WEBVTT

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Part three, chapters three, four, and five of the Kimasutra. This

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LibriVox recording is in the public domain
and is read by Mark Smith of Simpsonville,

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South Carolina. The Kimasutra by Vetsiayana, Part three, Chapter three on

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courtship and the manifestation of the feelings
by outward signs and deeds. A poor

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man possessed of good qualities, a
man born of a low family possessed of

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mediocre qualities, a neighbor possessed of
wealth, and one under the control of

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his father, mother, or brothers
should not marry without endeavoring to gain over

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the girl from her childhood to love
and esteem them. Thus, a boy

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separated from his parents and living in
the house of his uncle should try to

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gain over the daughter of his uncle
or some other girl, even though she

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be previously betrothed to another. And
this way of gaining over a girl,

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said Gotakamuka, is unexceptional, because
dharma can be accomplished by means of it

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as well as by any other way
of marriage. When a boy has thus

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begun to woo the girl he loves, he should spend his time with her

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and amuse her with various games.
And diversions fitted for their age and acquaintanceship,

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such as picking and collecting flowers,
making garlands of flowers, playing the

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parts of members of a fictitious family, cooking food, playing with dice,

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playing with cards, the game of
odd and even the game of finding out

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the middle finger, the game of
six pebbles, and such other games as

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may be prevalent in the country and
agreeable to the disposition of the girl.

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In addition to this, he should
carry on various amusing games played by several

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persons together, such as hide and
seek, playing with seeds, hiding things

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in several small heaps of wheat and
looking for them, blind man's bluff,

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stick exercises, and other games of
the same sort. In company with the

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girl, her friends and female attendants. The man should also show great kindness

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to any woman whom the girl thinks
fit to be trusted, and should also

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make new acquaintances. But above all
he should attach to himself by kindness and

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little services the daughter of the girl's
nurse, for if she be gained over,

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even though she comes to know of
his design, she does not cause

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any obstruction, but is sometimes even
able to effect a union between him and

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the girl, and though she knows
the true character of the man, she

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always talks of as many excellent qualities
to the parents and relations of the girl,

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even though she may not be desired
to do so by him. In

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this way, the man should do
whatever the girl takes most delight in,

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and he should get for her whatever
she may have a desire to possess.

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Thus he should procure for her such
playthings as may be hard hardly known to

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other girls. He may also show
her a ball dyed with various colors,

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and other curiosities of the same sort, and should give her dolls made of

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cloth, wood, buffalo, horn, ivory, wax, flour, or

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earth. Also utensils for cooking food, and figures in wood, such as

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a man and woman standing, a
pair of rams or goats or sheep.

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Also temples made of earth, bamboo, or wood dedicated to various goddesses,

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and cages for parrots, cuckoos,
starlings, quails, cocks, and partridges.

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Water vessels of different sorts and of
elegant forms, machines for throwing water

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about guitars, stands for putting images
upon stools, lac red arsenic yellow,

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ointment, vermilion, and coleerium,
as well as sandalwood, saffron, betel

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nut, and betel leaves. Such
things should be given at different times whenever

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he gets a good opportunity of meeting
her, and some of them should be

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given in private and some in public, according to circumstances. In short,

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he should try in every way to
make her look upon him as one who

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would do for her everything that she
wanted to be done. In the next

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place, he should get her to
meet him in some place privately, and

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should then tell her that the reason
of his giving presents to her in secret

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was the fear that the parents of
both of them might be displeased. And

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then he might add that the things
which he had given her had been much

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desired by other people. When her
love begins to show signs of increasing,

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he should relate to her agreeable stories. If she expresses a wish to hear

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such narratives, or if she takes
delight in Legerdamn, he should amaze her

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by performing various tricks of jugglery,
or if she feels a great curiosity to

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see a performance of the various arts, he should show his own skill in

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them. When she is delighted with
singing. He should entertain her with music,

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and on certain days and at the
time of going together to moonlight fairs

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and festivals, and at the time
of her return after being absent from home,

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he should present her with bouquets of
flowers, and with chaplets for the

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head, and with ear ornaments and
rings. For these are the proper occasions

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on which such things should be presented. He should also teach the daughter of

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the girl's nurse all the sixty four
means of pleasure practiced by men, and

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under this pretext should also inform her
of his great skill in the art of

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sexual enjoyment. All this time he
should wear a fine dress and make as

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good an appearance as possible. For
young women love men who live with them,

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and who are handsome, good looking, and well dressed. As for

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the saying that though women may fall
in love, they still make no effort

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themselves to gain over the object of
their affections, that is only a matter

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of idle talk. Now, a
girl always shows her love by outward signs

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and actions, such as the following. She never looks the man in the

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face, and becomes abashed when she
is looked at by him. Under some

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pretext or other, She shows her
limbs to him. She looks secretly at

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him though he has gone away from
her side, hangs down her head when

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she has asked some question by him, and answers in indistinct words and unfinished

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sentences. Delights to be in his
company for a long time. Speaks to

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her attendants in a peculiar tone with
the hope of attracting his attention towards her.

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When she is at a distance from
him, does not wish to go

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from the place where he is.
Under some pretext or other, She makes

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him look at different things, narrates
to him tales and stories very slowly so

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that she may continue conversing with him
for a long time time, kisses and

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embraces before him. A child sitting
at her lap, draws ornamental marks on

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the foreheads of her female servants,
performs sportive and graceful movements when her attendants

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speak jestingly to her in the presence
of her lover. Confides in her lover's

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friends and respects and obeys them.
Shows kindness to his servants, converses with

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them, and engages them to do
her work as if she were their mistress,

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And listens attentively to them when they
tell stories about her lover to somebody

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else. Enters his house when induced
to do so by the daughter of her

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nurse, and by her assistance,
manages to converse and play with him.

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Avoids being seen by her lover when
she is not dressed and decorated, gives

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him, by the hand of her
female friend her ear, ornament, ring,

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or garland of flowers that he may
have asked to see, always wears

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anything that he may have presented to
her. Become dejected when any other bridegroom

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is mentioned by her parents, and
does not mix with those who may be

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of her party or who may support
his claims. There are also some verses

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on the subject, as follows.
A man who has seen and perceive the

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feelings of the girl towards him,
and who has noticed the outward signs of

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movements by which those feelings are expressed, should do everything in his power to

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affect a union with her. He
should gain over a young girl by childlike

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sports, a damsel come of age
by his skill in the arts, and

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a girl that loves him by having
recourse to persons in whom she confides.

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Chapter four about Things to be done
only by the man and the acquisition of

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the girl. Thereby also what is
to be done by a girl to gain

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over a man and subject him to
her. Now, when the girl begins

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to show her love by outward signs
and motions, as described in the last

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chapter, the lover should try to
gain her over entirely by various ways and

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means, such as the following.
When engaged with her in any game or

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sport, he should intentionally hold her
hand. He should practice upon her the

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various kinds of embraces, such as
the touching embrace, and others already described

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in a preceding chapter, Part two. Chapter two. He should show her

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a pair of human beings cut out
of the leaf of a tree, and

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such things. At intervals. When
engaged in water sports, he should dive

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at a distance from her and come
up close to her. He should show

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an increased liking for the new foliage
of trees and such like things. He

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should describe to her the pangs he
suffers on her account. He should relate

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to her the beautiful dream that he
has had with reference to other women.

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At parties and assemblies of his caste, he should sit near her and touch

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her under some pretense or other,
and having placed his foot upon hers,

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he should slowly touch each of her
toes and press the ends of the nails.

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If successful in this, he should
get hold of her foot with his

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hand and repeat the same thing.
He should also press the finger of her

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hand between his toes when she happens
to be washing his feet. And whenever

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he gives anything to her or takes
anything from her, he should show her

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by his manner and look how much
he loves her. He should sprinkle upon

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her the water brought for rinsing his
mouth, And when alone with her in

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a lonely place or in darkness,
he should make love to her and tell

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her the true state of his mind, without distressing her in any way.

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Whenever he sits with her on the
same seat or bed, he should say

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to her, I have something to
tell you in private, And then when

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she comes to hear it in a
quiet place, he should express his love

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to her more by manner and signs
than by words. When he comes to

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know the state of her feelings towards
him, he should pretend to be ill,

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and should make her come to his
house to speak to him. There,

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he should intentionally hold her hand and
place it on his eyes and forehead,

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And under the pretense of preparing some
medicine for him, he should ask

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her to do work for his sake
in the following words. This work must

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be done by you and by nobody
else. When she wants to go away,

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he should let her go with an
earnest request to come and see him

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again. This device of illness should
be continued for three days and three nights.

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After this, when she begins coming
to see him frequently, he should

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carry on long conversations with her.
For says Gotakamuka, though a man love

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a girl ever so much, he
never succeeds in winning her without a great

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deal of talking. At last,
when the man finds the girl completely gained

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over, he may then begin to
enjoy her, as for the saying that

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women grow less timid than usual during
the evening and in darkness, and are

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desirous of congress at those times,
and do not oppose men then, and

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should only be enjoyed at these hours. It is a matter of talk.

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Only. When it is impossible for
the man to carry on his endeavors alone,

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he should, by means of the
daughter, of her nurse, or

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of a female friend in whom she
confides, cause the girl to be brought

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to him without making known to her
his design, and he should then proceed

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with her in the manner above described, or he should, in the beginning

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send his own female servant to live
with the girl as her friend, and

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should then gain her over by her
means. At last, when he knows

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the state of her feelings by her
outward manner and conduct towards him at religious

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ceremonies, marriage ceremonies, fairs,
fastisestivals, theaters, public assemblies, and

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such like occasions, he should begin
to enjoy her when she is alone.

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For Vetsiayana lays it down that women, when resorted to a proper times and

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improper places, do not turn away
from their lovers. When a girl possessed

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of good qualities and well bred,
though born in a humble family or destitute

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of wealth and not therefore desired by
her equals, or an orphan girl or

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one deprived of her parents, but
observing the rules of her family and caste,

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should wish to bring about her own
marriage when she comes of age,

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such a girl should endeavor to gain
over a strong and good looking young man

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or a person whom she thinks would
marry her on account of the weakness of

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his mind, and even without the
consent of his parents. She should do

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this by such means as would endear
her to the said person, as well

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as by frequently seeing and meeting him. Her mother also should constantly cause them

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to meet by means of her female
friends and the daughter of her nurse.

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The girl herself should try to get
alone with her beloved in some quiet place,

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and at odd times should give him
flowers, betel nut, betel leaves,

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and perfumes. She should also show
her skill in the practice of the

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arts, in shampooing, in scratching, and impressing with the nails. She

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should also talk to him on the
subjects he likes best, and discuss with

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him the ways and means of gaining
over and winning the affections of a girl.

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But old authors say that although the
girl loves the man ever so much,

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she should not offer herself or make
the first overtures. For a girl

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who does this loses her dignity and
is liable to be scorned and rejected.

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But when the man shows his wish
to enjoy her, she should be favorable

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to him and should show no change
in her demeanor when he embraces her,

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and should receive all the manifestations of
his love as if she were ignorant of

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the state of his mind. But
when he tries to kiss her, she

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should oppose him. When he begs
to be allowed to have sexual intercourse with

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her, she should let him touch
her private parts only and with considerable difficulty.

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And though importuned by him, she
should not yield herself up to him

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as if of her own accord,
but should resist his attempts to have her.

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It is only moreover, when she
is certain that she is truly loved,

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and that her lover is indeed devoted
to her and will not change his

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mind, that she should then give
herself up to him and persuade him to

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marry her Quickly. After losing her
virginity, she should tell her confidential friends

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about it. Here ends the efforts
of a girl to gain over a man.

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There are also some verses on this
subject, as follows. A girl

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who is much sought after should marry
the man that she likes and whom she

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thinks would be obedient to her and
capable of giving her pleasure. But when

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from the desire of wealth, a
girl is married by her parents to a

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rich man without taking into consideration the
character or looks of the bridegroom, or

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when given to a man who has
several wives, she never becomes attached to

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the man, even though he be
endowed with good qualities, obedient to her

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will, active, strong and healthy, and anxious to please her in every

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way. Footnote there is a good
deal of truth in the last few observations.

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Woman is a monogamous animal, and
loves but one, and likes to

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feel herself alone in the affections of
one man, and cannot bear rivals.

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It may also be taken as a
general rule that women either married into or

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kept by rich men love them for
their wealth, but not for themselves.

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And footnote. A husband who is
obedient but yet master of himself, though

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he be poor and not good looking, is better than one who is common

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to many women, even though he
be handsome and attractive. The wives of

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rich men, where there are many
wives, are not generally attached to their

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husbands, and are not confidential with
them, And even though they possess all

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the external enjoyments of life, still
have recourse to other men. A man

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who is of a low mind,
who has fallen from his social position,

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and who is much given to traveling, does not deserve to be married.

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Neither does one who has many wives
and children, or one who is devoted

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to sport and gambling, and who
comes to his wife only when he likes.

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Of all the lovers of a girl, he only is her true husband

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who possesses the qualities that are liked
by her. And such a husband only

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enjoys real superiority over her because he
is the husband of love. Chapter five

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on certain forms of marriage. Footnote. These forms of marriage differ from the

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four kinds of marriage mentioned in chapter
one, and are only to be made

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use of when the girl is gained
over in the way mentioned in chapters three

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and four, and footnote. When
a girl cannot meet her lover frequently in

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private, she should send the daughter
of her nurse to him, it being

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understood that she has confidence in her
and had previously gained her over to her

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interests. On seeing the man,
the daughter of the nurse should, in

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the course of conversation describe to him
the noble birth, the good disposition,

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the beauty, talent, skill,
knowledge of human nature, and affection of

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the girl in such a way as
not to let him suppose that she has

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been sent by the girl, and
should thus create affection for the girl in

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the heart of the man. To
this girl, also, she should speak

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about the excellent qualities of the man, especially of those qualities which she knows

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are pleasing to the girl. She
should moreover speak with disparagement of the other

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lovers of the girl, and talk
about the avarice and indiscretion of their parents

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and the fickleness of their relations.
She should also quote samples of many girls

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of ancient times, such as Secuntala
and others, who, having united themselves

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with lovers of their own caste and
their own choice, were ever happy afterwards

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in their society. And she should
also tell of other girls who married into

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great families, and, being troubled
by rival wives, became wretched and miserable,

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and were finally abandoned. She should
further speak of the good fortune,

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the continual happiness, the chastity,
obedience, and affection of the man,

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And if the girl gets amorous about
him, she should endeavor to allay her

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shame and her fear, as well
as her suspicions about any disaster that might

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result from the marriage. Footnote about
this see a story on the fatal effects

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of love at page one fourteen of
Early Ideas, a group of Hindu stories

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collected and collated by Honaryan W.
H. Hallon and Company, London,

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eighteen eighty one, and a footnote
in a word. She should act the

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whole part of a female messenger,
by telling the girl all about the man's

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affection for her, the places he
frequented, and the endeavors he made to

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meet her, and by frequently repeating
it will be all right if the man

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will take you away forcibly and unexpectedly
the forms of marriage. When the girl

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is gained over and acts openly with
the man as his wife, he should

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cause fire to be brought from the
house of a Brahmin, and, having

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spread the kusha grass upon the ground
and offered an oblation to the fire,

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he should marry her according to the
precepts of the relation religious law. After

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this he should inform his parents of
the fact, because it is the opinion

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of ancient authors that a marriage solemnly
contracted in the presence of fire cannot afterwards

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be set aside. After the consummation
of the marriage, the relations of the

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man should gradually be made acquainted with
the affair and the relations of the girl,

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should also be apprized of it in
such a way that they may consent

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to the marriage and overlook the manner
in which it was brought about. And

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when this is done, they should
afterwards be reconciled by affectionate presence and favorable

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conduct. In this manner, the
man should marry the girl according to the

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Gundharva form of marriage. When the
girl cannot make up her mind and will

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not express her readiness to Mary,
the man should obtain her in any one

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of the following ways. One,
on a fitting occasion, and under some

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excuse, he should, by means
of a female friend with whom he is

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well acqu pointed and whom he can
trust, and who also is well known

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to the girl's family, get the
girl brought unexpectedly to his house, and

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he should then bring fire from the
house of a Brahmin, and proceed as

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therefore described. Two. When the
marriage of the girl with some other person

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draws near, the man should disparage
the future husband to the utmost in the

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mind of the mother of the girl, And then, having got the girl

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to come with her mother's consent to
a neighboring house, he should bring fire

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from the house of a brahmin,
and proceed as above. Three. The

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man should become a great friend of
the brother of the girl, the said

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brother being of the same age as
himself and addicted to courtesans and to intrigues

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with the wives of other people,
and should give him assistance in such matters,

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and also give him occasional presents.
He should then tell him about his

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great love for his sister, as
young men will sacrifice even their lives for

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the sake of those who may be
of the same age, habits and dispositions

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as themselves. After this, the
man should get the girl brought by means

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of her brother to some secure place, and having brought fire from the house

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of a brahmin, should proceed as
before. Four. The man should,

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on the occasion of festivals, get
the daughter of the nurse to give the

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girl some intoxicating substance, and then
cause her to be brought to some secure

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place under the pretense of some business, and their having enjoyed her before she

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recovers from her intoxication, should bring
fire from the house of a brahmin,

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and proceed as before. Five.
The man should with the connivance of the

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daughter of the nurse, carry off
the girl from her house while she is

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asleep, and then, having enjoyed
her before she recovers from her sleep,

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should bring fire from the house of
a Brahmin, and proceed as before.

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Six. When the girl goes to
a garden or to some village in the

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neighborhood, the man should, with
his friends, fall on her guards,

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and, having killed them or frightened
them away forcibly carry her off and proceed

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as before. There are verses on
the subject as follows. In all the

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forms of marriage given in this chapter
of this work, the one that precedes

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is better than the one that follows
it on account of its being more in

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accordance with the commands of religion.
And therefore it is only when it is

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impossible to carry the former into practice
that the latter should be resorted to.

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As the fruit of all good marriages
is love. The Gandharva form of marriage

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is respected even though it is formed
under unfavorable circumstances, because it fulfills the

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object sought for footnote about the Gandharva
Vivaha form of marriage see note to page

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twenty eight of Captain R. F. Burton's Vikram and the Vampire, or

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00:25:02.640 --> 00:25:08.279
Tales of Hindu Devilry Longmand Greening Company, London, eighteen seventy. This form

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of matrimony was recognized by the ancient
Hindus and is frequent in books. It

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is a kind of Scotch wedding ultra
Caledonian, taking place by mutual consent without

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any form or ceremony. The Gandharvas
are heavenly minstrels of Indra's court who are

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supposed to be witnesses and footnote.
Another cause of the respect, according to

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the Gandharva form of marriage is that
it brings forth happiness, causes less trouble

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in its performance than any other forms
of marriage, and is above all the

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result of previous love. End of
Part three