Hello, and welcome to another episode of ten podcast Lane. In this episode,
we try to delve into the mystery wrapped in a conundrum that is retro
speed runnings Knucklebuster. Usually when a person in the speed running community thinks of
Ninja Guiding, instantly the feats of Arcas and the retro runners spring to mind.
But for the deeply in there is also another name that grasps or imagination
and wonder from a looming presence with no face or voice that still dominates with
flip flops and swagger to unimaginable times in eighty percent, low percent pacifist and
beyond. But who is the eponymous Knucklebuster? There are many rumors and theories
about his true identity, ranging from Tom Cruise to Jesus Christ himself to a
wanderer who sold his soul to the devil for the gaming prowess he now possesses.
Let's look into this mystery together and try to uncover the truth behind KB
Knucklebuster. March twenty third, twenty TI twenty was your average day, Young
Gaya. The sun rose in the east as the moon faded to the west,
and Earth was doing its usual one thoy six hundred kilometer traveled through the
vast emptiness of space. All was good in the ninja goiding community. Arcus
still dominated since twenty eighteen, and the Retrunner was still in a strong second
before we knew the magic he would later produce. Then all of a sudden,
there was a new contender throwing his cap in the ring, a young
upstart and emulator but the name of Knucklebuster, submitted at a time of twelve
minutes and thirty one seconds that s or simud of the time garadis twenty one
verified. But it wasn't his first submission. No, his first submission was
an actual ninja license run of twelve minutes twenty seven that unfortunately could not be
verified due to the frame counter not being enabled on the emulator, but it
was a submission no less. This was promptly followed on the eighteenth of April
twenty twenty with a twelve twenty six run ninja license after two accepted submissions.
Now, most will be happy with this, and I'm sure KB was,
but this wasn't enough for him. He thought, why not branch out in
categories, So that's exactly what he did. On May sixth, twenty twenty
with an impressive thirteen minute thirty seven run in Ninja guiding low percent. Having
got this milestone, KB went back to better his eighty percent time, implementing
skills attained in his low percent run and adding more swag along the way,
first improving with twelve twenty three, then with a massive twelve second PV,
bringing him down to an anti percent personal best of twelve minutes and eleven seconds.
Over the next year, he would switch back and forth between Ninja guiden
aty percent and low percent, improving his personal bests and skill with every submitted
run. Then, on March thirty first, twenty twenty one, KB would
add to his catalog of guiden with a first passifist submission of fifteen minutes and
thirty two seconds, and on August seventeenth, twenty twenty one, further adding
his guiding one hundred percent time. As before, he would chop and change
between categories on stream with the skill of a ninja and stoic silence of a
shellon monk, even adding a v he can percent category to pacify the easily
offended hippies. This brings us up to where we are today currently as of
October twenty twenty three, Knucklebuster's Ninja Guiden catalog is fifth place in ninety percent,
fourth place in one hundred percent, second place in low percent, and
the aforementioned vegan percent, and currently he holds the Ninja Guiden world record in
the Pacifist category, which in my opinion is easily one of the toughest speed
runs you can do as a whole let alone. Ninja Guiden with only Damageless
sping harder due to the precision and speed needed to kill the demon head without
taking damage. Now the man went out of face and the sweet voice of
a deaf mute does an only run Ninja Guiden Hell No. He has numerous
runs under his belt, including an impressive twelfth place in Bart versus the Space
Mutants, a sub ten minute run in Super Mario Brothers two, Andy Percent,
a world record in Super Street Fighter two, and a ridiculous world record
in Chippendale one Player two Controllers on the nes, which epitomizes the links the
Voice of the Voiceless will go to outswag the best in the world of speed
running. This episode of ten Podcast Lane is sponsored by Mixed Chili. Mix
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L l I dot com. And now back to the show. Now we
get to the good stuff, the digging, the findings and the rumblings of
who Knucklebuster is the hidden face voiceless stream gaming from the shadows. He is
someone that doesn't want the agile, just the band's chats. An occasional world
record. This to me screams, this is a place where I can be
myself, be anonymous, and be treated as an equal, which may be
different from his normal day to day. Some say he fasts for forty days
and forty nights at Easter, sparking the debate of whether or not he is
Jesus Christ reincarnated. The handsome Irish speed Runner Stabby Dead Guy has jumped to
think that he may in fact be none other than actor Tom Cruise due to
the death defying stunts KB pulls off in game. But what do we actually
know about KB. Fellow Ninja Guiden Runner and possible KB clone Black Squall was
once quoted as saying, which spoke volumes about the telepathic connection between the two
signed language and mode enthusiasts. Let's look at the facts. He's from the
West Coast of America in the LA area, an animal lover, a skateboarder.
These alone add up to the possibility of him being of higher society of
Hollywood. If I was a betting man, and I'm not, my initial
guess would be Jack Black. We know he's funny with a very distinct voice,
who was a gamer and also skateboards and longboards exhibit a being the skateboard
and the discord with the have you seen him sticker synonymous with Peril Parle the
longboards. We know a friend was quoted as saying, let's just say he
has a voice, which could read into as a distinct voice, which would
make sense as to why he doesn't talk and stream. Another possibility linked with
this would be Steve O, another skateboarder who is an avid gamer. My
third more out there guests would be Tony Hawk, another man who's big into
games and skateboarding. But for me, this is a little bit out there.
What if though it's another man, What if it's a distinct gaming woman
who also skateboards. For this, we could look at the possibility of it
being Avril Levine, this skater girl herself. Just a couple of guesses I'll
throw out as well, maybe Henry Caville, maybe Donald Trump, or maybe
skateboarder day One song. Either way, no matter who he is, he
will forever be a mystery that lives rent free in my fucking head because I
don't know who he is and it's really annoying, But I still love them
all the time. So make sure to hit me up on Twitch or something
like that with your guesses on who Knucklebuster is. So that brings us to
the end of another episode of ten podcast line, a bit of a different
episode this time, like the Goola one, it's a bit of a kind
of love letter to the to the retro speed running community and my friends there
who are just it's the best community in the world. Bunch of thirty and
forty year old lads trying to run games from our youth as fast as possible.
And be sure to tune in on the weekend of the twenty eighth of
October on Music and Gaming's Twitch channel for Horror Balser two. It's going to
be class two days of horror speed runs, games and events. I'll be
speed running Murder House for a second year in a row, myself trying to
better my time from last year, So be sure to tune in and have
a listener and a laugh. So, as always, until next time,
aim for the bushes.