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your Worker's comp attorneys from the Mac of All Trade Studio in Fairport and
driven by Victor Chrysler Dots. Give Bram It's bilified the Bill Moran Podcast.
Well, hello and welcome. Thank you forgetting your pot on. Thanks for
telling a friend. That's how we spread the word about the pirate ship,
one mother at a time. On Mother's Day, one mother at a time.
So my mom is here today. My dad's actually in the studio,
but I wanted to see himself in camera and said just for play. Didn't
want to be on camera. They're all in town for Jordan's graduation, which
I will admit I had some worries about as how all this would go.
I don't think it could have gotten better cool. The only thing I did
today was I did say to my parents is that I wish I had done
the toast a little differently, and I wish I had done something else.
Now, you guys should not slurred it. No, I I didn't slur
it, So Bill bradsc I did not. I did not, But I
will tell you this, I did get annoyed at the boys because all of
a sudden, where everybody's gathered, we're in Cobblestone on Maine. Did a
great job. The food was fantastic. Downstairs, h I was gonna say,
you're at the whole downstairs. No, not the whole downstairs. There
was just this smaller area that had a table for twelve that I knew we
would all fit at. And it has its own entrance. So it's just
easier to get in and out. And all of a sudden we can't find
Jackson and Jordan and so now and I'm pacing around and everybody's sort of standing
at the table awkwardly, but the guest of honor is not there. So
I go upstairs and I see them and they're at the bar and I go,
Fellas, what are you doing? Who were getting a drink? I
said, yeah, come on down, I will get you whatever you want.
This is ridiculous, but everybody's waiting for you. I mean we're a
good fifteen minutes three aged shots, right, so no, so I so
I look up Kevin, they're pouring guinness, and George like, oh,
I would just want to have a drink with my older brother now that I
graduated. I said you could do that after, because they were going to
go out after which, by the way, I already got the report they
were Montconnery's and everything last night and I so I said, well, then
you're paying for this. So they bought their and then came down and joined
us. But today that same brother who doesn't want to have who wanted to
have a beer? I want to have a beer with my older brother now
that I've graduated. That's all he was trying to do. Dad won't come
get his brother to bring him to have dinner with his mom at a restaurant
in the city. Well they did their drinks. They're good. Yeah,
absolutely, it's the quarter. It was asadine it was. It was ridiculous,
but the graduation was great and everything went off without it, without a
hitch. I was worried that you had said he might not be back,
and I saw the picture at least when we knew we got back. Well,
So there was all these questions all day. Because Jordan was competing in
South Carolina, my dad and I tried to watch him on Friday via the
internet. So I paid thirteen dollars to watch security camera footage of Jordan.
It was all it was all like choppy because they have the throwing field is
the furthest probably away from the internet router, so it was it looked like
security footage as they're walking across. It was like a bad video game back
in the night. And we watched that and I can see I can't really
tell because what they did was they placed the camera that they're throwing toward it,
so it's out on the field going back in see, really, you're
from a distance. It should be behind where they're throwing so you can see
them, so I can't really tell. And I think it's Jordan, and
I say, it didn't seem like it went as far as I've seen him
throw, and all this within seconds, as should I say that the phone
rings, my shoes broke, but immediately says, but I had a really
great season overall, and I said that perfect, that's all we need.
Let's go with that. You had to really yeah, So then he said,
no, I gotta get in a van for thirteen hours with a bunch
of sweaty people. And I go, okay, well you chose to go
down there, and they made it back. He was back by five o'clock
in the morning, and uh, you know, so everything worked out fine.
Everybody asked me the next day, have you heard from Jordan? Have
you seen Jordan? Thinking is he going to be here or not be here?
And I said, I don't know. I haven't checked. I figured
if it was bad to well, I figured I figured if it was bad
news, i'd hearn. Don't you always hear the bad news, it's the
good news. You never hear no it's always the bad news. If there's
shit hitting the fan, they're fine, you no, like you know.
That's why if I ever had to deliver my parents or any family members bad
news, I always start out with okay, everybody's okay. I love it,
so they okay, So they know that like not to like hold their
breath or have a heart attack. I've had to deliver three of those messages
over the years. Well, I was all apologetic today because you know,
it's Mother's Day. My mother's here, so I wasn't sure what to do
when I didn't make I had called Damien and said, are you doing anything
for Mother's Day? And he said should? I thums an Island and I
said, well, is there any you know? Are you doing a brunch
or anything over at Montconnery's And he happened to be sitting on the plane on
the tarmac heading out of town when I called him at to begin or at
the end of last week, I think before the weekend. So he said
no, but we're open, and I thought it was open at eleven,
so we showed up at eleven twenty two. They weren't open till eleven thirty.
We were the first people there. There's no real brunch thing. My
mother even says to me, I'm trying to talk to my stomach to make
it want lunch and not brunch. So now I feel like shit, I'm
going this is terrible. Within an hour, the place is packed, the
food was great. Damien comes in, he's doing all this stuff. Oh,
Kate is calling, all right, step out. And then he got
a knee bike, so I rode his ee bike for a minute. And
then we went over and there was Danny. Will you will not appreciate that
this today? Okay? This is uh. There was a psychic fare over
at at Iron Smoke and all the tarot card readings were booked until six thirty.
Sure, I mean Danny. The line it was like Disney, Yeah,
and down the stairs and around. I think people are My father could
ask me, do you think this is entertainment or do you think that people
believe? And I don't know. I think if you push most people there
half and half. I agree Kevin. I think that people will tell you
entertainment, But I think that a lot of people do believe. I think
they're looking for answers. Yeah, who's that psychic woman with the big blonde
hair. Oh, like the Long Island when she came to town a few
years Yeah, when she came to town to the Auditorium Theater, it was
the only show that was sold out for the year. Like the rest of
the show's the Auditorium Theater, like you could buy tickets a walk up.
That show was sold out immediately because every every and it's usually like ninety percent
women who go A lot of women, Yeah, it's not guys necessarily a
few. So you could go through and for five dollars you could pull one
card and they would give you the reading. So I got a card,
did you got? I got the hermit card? Okay, so the hermit
card. Listen to this. Now, do you tell me if this is
someone accurate or not? I don't know. She said. Sometimes you wind
up doing so much stuff, you become a hermit that you almost shut yourself
off from other people. And then you put the balloons in and you float
up and you see everybody. But then there's times you need to come back
down and you need to find a balance in whether you're buried in stuff or
you're out. And I went entertaining and authentic. I thought the same thing.
It weirded me out. It weirded me out. And I know that
you go to bed last night and this morning I got that. We got
we had a medium coming in in a couple of weeks. She's gonna be
in touch. She's gonna come in, she is gonna come Okay, So
my family and I have a pack and I told them, I said,
I'm gonna give you all a word, yeah, okay, to disprove this
whole philosophy. And we only we know that word, and it's a different
word for each one of them, So that I go. You could go
to any medium and say, my brother gave me a word that when he
passes, we're gonna have a secret word. If you can't tell us that
word, we know you're full of it. But is it after you passed
or yeah, after I once I passed. Oh okay, Okay, they're
gonna go and they're gonna test these people out and see what the word is.
Spoiler. It's Bill's super Bowl. Now I knows. As a Christian,
Now do you have do you think there's anything anybody who can tap into?
Maybe? Well there are, yeah, Like even the Bible talks about
in Second Samuel it talks about I'm sorry. First Samuel, Samuel dies and
Saul like goes and dresses up and goes to a medium to try to find
out, like, you know, his future because he knows he's on the
run and he was trying to kill David because David's annointed to be in the
next king. And he goes, wake up, wake up a guy named
Samuel. I need to talk to him because Samuel was the seer of Israel.
And he contacts Samuel and Samuel's like, what are you trying to bother
me for? I'm busy in the afterlife enjoying myself. I'm resting right in
a place called Abra, which we found out later was Abraham's Bosom, and
he do and then the realized, wait, you're Saul. You're the king
of Israel, aren't you. And he was like, uh yeah, uh
yeah, maybe I am. So what's it to you? Because he's tried.
In the next day, he ended up whacking himself basically falling on his
sword. That he get the phrase falling on your sword. Now, there's
a lot of details in there I didn't put in there, but the point
is, yeah, what he's not telling you is that Samuel L. Jackson,
what's it, yo, wallet A shock at me? I always think
that it's uh that there there there's energy, and some people can tap in
and read the energy. And I always think that the you know, you
could be more tapped in and tuned in, turned on, so to speak.
I think that was the phrase in the sixties, was it not tap
into? The Bible talks about familiar spirits. That doesn't mean necessarily that you
actually like, let's say, like if I want to and I'm not saying
I would do this, I want to contact my father right there could be
somebody there pretending to be my father on the other side. That doesn't mean
it was my father. There are people who have those like demon like abilities,
but they only will take you so so far. The idea is that
if you're trying to trust in a medium to get answers, you're not putting
your faith in God, who's supposed to let your steps one at a time.
You're not supposed to know, Just trust God. That's that's the whole
idea behind it. Now, if people want to do that, you know,
my wife gets into that stuff, my boss gets into that stuff.
Hey, knock yourselves out. I don't need to know nothing I know,
but one thing I will say, ladies and gentlemen, four years ago we
learned actually twenty nineteen. They're all these psychic fairs, and no one brought
up the pandemic. Nobody Now what person saw a pandemic? Dummick, not
buddy everything. Didn't want to worry people. Maybe yeah, yeah, maybe
that's it. I want to know about it. Maybe maybe not. What
do you say to that? Well, you do healing in reiki, healing
and energy, but that's energy. That's different. She's not giving you tonight's
lotto numbers. No, Danny had aphip his fitbit caught his a fip at
night. Yes, yeah, yeah, Mi. Now I'm on a seatpath.
I'm like an acronym machine. Are you in trouble with Katie for h
okay? A lot of pressures with Mother's Day? I don't know. Yeah,
and now I'm starting to see that the pressure on Kevin's mom passed away
in the fall. Yeah this year, Yeah, don't give that. Well,
maybe we could get mom and medium the Mother's Day. I think you
could still talk. I do think that you can talk. Do you ever
just go and talk to your dad? Oh? Yeah. Yeah, he's
always yelling at me. Though I have dreams about my father, he's always
disappointment. He's always yelling, really you again, you figure this out?
I feel like, you know Michael the godfather. Well, I would always
think like there's pressure to do something with mom. Uh, and then even
if you mess up, there's always the phrase that none of us believe.
Oh honey, don't worry about it, I just wanted to spend time with
you. We all think that's bullshit. And then I feel like I have
competition with my brother and sister, who have great well, but they're great
gift givers. Both of them really good gift givers, like thoughtful Katie gives
really creative gifts. And I always feel like that, well I do.
Yeah, well I found out I found out some So every year on Mother's
that we find out something about Mom that we didn't really so a family member,
right, like sometimes it could get pretty darker other times here, like
I found some stuff about my grandfather, her father yesterday. Then I was
like, oh, really, I thought he's worse than I thought. Well
anyway, but that's not My sister calls me like I went to show,
Hey, I go with the kids are screaming in the back. I got
it's dinner time. Oh, that'll be fine. Listen, we gotta talk.
What are you doing for mom for Mother's Day? Probably? I don't
know. I'm probably gonna, you know, call her up. Hang on,
Dad, you're calling me? Okay, we trust phone trying this medium
thing. I didn't know what it was. Oh, Kate calling you.
Sorry, Well you can go out and talk. I'm okay. Mother's Day.
So what did you learn about your Well? So my sister goes,
hey, what are you doing for mom for Mother's Day? I go,
I was gonna call her and see what she wanted to do. Get her
the usual potted plant that she can hang, the hanger planks that we do
her Mother's Day, right, but she loves them. So I'm like,
okay, probably take her. I go, well, because you know every
year sheh I see her around this time of year and she comes up and
then she doesn't say anything, but then she'll let it out that somebody didn't
do something for Mother's Day, or somebody didn't do this. It's like,
I'm like, mom keeps tabs like that. Yeah, she goes, Yeah,
I go, what has she ever said? About me. She goes,
well, nothing, you're pretty good about this. I go, oh,
okay, side, yeah, I go. But even she complains like
that to protect I wonder, but I'm like, no, I do something
for my mother every single year. I just don't remember what I do year
to year. I just I just do it, just do the same thing
every year. Apparently, apparent every year creative can't come on. Well,
my wife, like, they get they have fundraisers at school, so they
sell those hangers and like, and she goes, how much should I get
this year? Two or three? I just get two and if we need
a third one, I'll go get a gift certificate or something. Now.
My favorite was my aunt and my grandmother, my mom's sister and her mom.
Now you remember them. When we worked on CMF, I played the
voicemail that she left me. Know what it says? I know what it
says. That was the one WORDAD called on my birthday and I'm mowing the
lawn and I had I was listening to music on my phone and I had
missed a call earlier, and she says, oh, hi, Billy,
happy birthday. Did you get our message? I said no? She said,
oh, don't listen to the voicemail, so you knew I had to.
But on Mother's Day? Did they ever get in fights? On Mother's
Day? They got some epic fights. I remember. I'll tell you what
I know they did on Father's Day because I was with them one year and
it was me might have been Mother's Day. We were going out for for
uh well, I had gone down. You guys were in the Florida it
was Easter. It was Easter. It was Easter because the time had just
changed. And I'm driving and my grandfather dies later months later, like if
this is April. He's dead in August. He was very sick with cancer.
And we're going out to like an Easter brunch and my aunt and my
grandmother in the back and they're having an all out yelling over the time because
we sprung forward and no we can figure out what time it is, if
the clock is right or wrong. They're going at it and he's trying to
referee from right around right. It just was It was just funny. I
have to I think I have that voicemail somewhere. I tried looking for it
last year, God, and I couldn't find it. If you could find
that, if I can find that voice boil because I know because like when
you went to the drive, Yes, can I get a phone call?
It's like you real quiet. He's like all clandestine sounding. I'm like,
Bill, I'm right here. We have to whisper. I don't think anyone's
gonna tell on us, Hey you got that voicemail. I need the voicemail.
Well, because the radio stations would pull this bullshit that they owned everything
that went over the air, whether it was yours or not. And I
said, this thing they shouldn't own. This was This was the greatest comedy
ever written. And it wasn't written by anyone but the performers themselves. This
was my grandmother tried to leave me in veste and she can't realize that it's
my voicemail. She starts talking as though it's me. And my answer to
that, it's his voicemail. I know, I know what it says.
I know what it is. Mary. Well, you're talking like it's him.
It's not him. It's his voicemail. I get it. Just leave
me alone. Oh, go ahead and die. And this is how it
goes. It was the greatest comedy ever. Just leave me alone. I've
got to find this. I can't imagine what that trip was like, but
it was just it was funny and it was all love. It was all
love. I you know, I loved your mother. I don't mean that.
What would you say is the hardest hardest thing about being a mom?
Is there a hard part? To me? Because I think if someone asked
me what's the hardest part about being that, I don't know. I don't
know that there's necessarily a hard part. You're just in there now, you
love the most. Well, if you asked Jamison, he'll tell you,
and they ask you. Even the grandson yesterday said and I know I'm your
favor We play that game every year with my mother. But it's it's part
of a joke. But I don't know, like do you? I think
I think you're always questioning your own judgments, you know, yeah, and
like almost what you were saying today with the toast, yeah, look back
and go God, I could have done that better. Well. I did
a toast yesterday and I said one of the things I wish I had done
was say, everybody here at the table helped get you know, we're a
kind of a cog in the wheel that helped you reach the finish line,
right, Yeah, yeah, that's bad phrasing. But so I and I
didn't say that. I just said everybody had to say a little a little
bit of an investment. Well they did, because I mean there were you
know, everybody had a thing. He would call it. He knew it's
funny how kids know their parents, right, because he would call his mother
at three o'clock in the morning with whatever crisis was going on. He and
call me. But when he got into some kind of trouble, he would
call me because my hands would be like, are you okay? All right?
Don't worry about this when the sun comes up and everybody will be fine.
You didn't get video of the speech. I don't think so, No,
I didn't. I didn't. I didn't. Yeah, I wasn't gonna.
I know what you're saying. It would have been Uh. Jordan gave
a nice one at the end. Yeah, it's sort of the same thing
that that that did. That my mother's sake can can be hard. Was
it harder for you this year? For you? No carrying the kids and
all everything. So cleaning the shutout, that's it, And that's not the
euphanism. He was really he's getting a new shed in his backyard, so
we had to clean out the sheds. But well, are they coming with
the dumpster? They will be yes, I'll call him tomorrow, Yeah,
because they're getting the dumpster in the in the whole thing I lost when I
lost my dad. The first year was hard, and then year by year
was like, holy cow, well everybody else is out doing the Father's Day
thing. I got all this other time to do something else. You find
out that, like, because now you know where everybody is because it's Father's
Day, they're on the golf course, or they're barbecuing. Restaurants really aren't
packed on Fathers they're not so Actually you have the entire day to go out
and do whatever you want, and there's really not a ton of like lines
or anything like that. That just shows us that mom does the majority indoor
cooking. Indoor you say, barbecue is usually Dad's not always, but usually
and usually dad on Father's Day. Barbarous yourself, like I'm the master of
the grill. Today's my day to prove it. If they forget batchuls,
it wasn't me, it was your mother. That's true because the man who
runs the grill is the man who runs the house. Apparently I've heard.
I don't know. All right, we will, we'll take him all.
We're gonna call my brother and do uh yo, mama. But I wrote
nice ones. I wrote all nice ones. We're snap with your mom.
Yeah, but we're gonna snap back and forth. But I wrote nice ones.
I know Kevin's I told your brother to do. Did you really give
you the worst your mama off ever? Did you tell him the right nice
ones? I said, you know, I said you could play either way.
I went, well, we'll have to find out. We'll do that
and uh in a couple of minutes. But I didn't realize an Ethiopia.
By the way, Mother's Day three days, three days? Yeah, well,
it takes three days just to find food. I think over there,
I'm not sure to do anything, but you have to start Thursday. They
did. They said it's three days. I said, the only thing we
do that's your birthday. We do three days for your birthdays. Mom.
You know, Bob Marley festus a whole week. I know, it's a
week. All right. We'll take a moment on the Mother's Day with my
mom and studio. We will come back with more of that next. Leo's
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protected with circul Law. Bursting with a empathy, I'm feeling everything. Wait,
oh, the world on my shoulders. My tears don't freak you out.
They're just kind of come out into the music. And me and all
of the colors wish we didn't live, wish we didn't leave so far for
each other. I'm just sitting here thinking about the time sleep and miss I'm
other. It's Mother's say songs. It's Casey Musgrave's mother. Next one's gonna
be dansa Rightly Mother, which is a very different Actually, we will play
that next just to show you that. But it's a pretty song, is
that yeah? And that's no, it's a daughter singing. I missed my
mother. I wish we weren't so far away. I missed my mother.
I've never seen that. Kevin handed me his son home from Quinnipiaca. We
gonna get him in trouble. He doesn't listen. Okay, well no,
but he has fake ideas. One does not even really look like him.
That's the what he found. Had one of his but her maids found on
the floor in the bar and gave it to him, so it looks like
it doesn't really it's a New Jersey hair. But then the other one is
is a fake New York State one. Then he paid for this allegedly.
Okay, well right, allegedly, I understand, but I I took mine
out. Now mine, I don't know what I need to renew twenty twenty
five, but it's raised in certain areas and there's no raised here and there's
no number. But his says enhanced. Mine should be enhanced as well.
Are they the same size? Like if you put yours on top of the
same size, they are the same size. They have the same Here's the
probably the thing, now, don't I don't the number on the back,
That's the one thing I pointed out to. The number on the back,
Yeah, doesn't match the number on the upper right. Are they looking that
hard though? I don't think they are. Well, I don't know either,
right and I that's the thing that I don't know. They told me
though at the d m V. I said that once I said, you're
gonna put down six foot for my license, they actually put down six foot.
Well, baby, here's the deal. See, you're sixteen, so
you're gonna grow, so we want you to catch up with you. We
want you to catch up with your size. I've never heard of that,
And I'm like, okay, yeah, I've never heard it. Still you
didn't, I told, Okay, So Beth and I like, after brunch,
we went to Dick Sporting Goods. She was looking for nunchucks. Well
anyway, like they don't apparently she actually do a little chucking every now and
then. No, but I think they do sell. I thought they sold
almost nerf versions. They don't. Oh they didn't. At least we couldn't
find. I could have bought stun guns at the Dixon, Connecticut. Really
they had tasers. You can buy them there. Yeah, they were only
twenty bucks at pink purple, all the different colors. I what scary.
But I went to Palma Basketball. I'm like, I go. My hand
stopped growing it in like eighth grade because I knew there was a kidnam Johny
Miller, who could palm a basketball barely, and I couldn't palm the basketball.
I'm forty four now. I can't palm a basketball. It's not even
a girl's ball. I can't pal like Katelyn Clark could palm a basketball,
but I can't. Well, yeah, right, some ladies. Just so.
I've never hit six feet. Yeah, well, I think that's the
problem with my middle son. It's because even his younger brother now is six
foot okay, yeah he's not. And George in the picture you can see
clearly if you actually look, he's just short as one. Oh yeah,
my brother's tower. Only the strongest, but still the shortest. At the
moment, I saw a woman at the hotel. We were saying that she
made me look short. She was like six' five. I jo enormous
woman. Yeah, I'm a holy crap tall or big tall? Just tall.
Yeah. Well, I had a neighbor who was six foot and she
said that and very feminine looking. But if she was in an aisle at
home depot with a hat on and there was somebody coming over, yeah,
please come from behind, Uh, sir, can you find anything? And
then she would turn around and it was not at all. It is but
we just I don't think that there's any malice behind that. I just think
that people get a little offended. Yeah, so what is he gonna do
with this? Has it worked for him? Is that it worked? Okay?
I probably they assuming most bars are just looking at the date and say,
yep, it's yeah over the day we needed to be. I'm looking
at mine and I'm looking at those and like the new York State license.
Jesus Costanza. I'm sorry, Like they have the Danny, what is that?
What is that? That's my wallet? No, it looks like a
deck of plane. Oh yeah, it's like a brick. It's like,
yeah, well what kind of wall is this? The ridge? It basically
it protects you, like from people reading your data. Yeah, try to
steal my dad Danny paranoid bullet for it. But to go back, Yeah,
that's the other part to you get so paranoid. Who's staking? You
never know, man, with what they're gonna steal your id? Stoking like
yeah, we're good, we'll get it back to Okay, we're talking about
ghosts early in the first segment or people can read minds, right, so
you are no ghostskirit spirits? All right, whatever? So urber Pat McMahon,
we used to work with him one night when we worked at the JK.
Hunt building in High Falls. He had a ghost hunt and he had
these like little laser guns that detected like heat, that could tell heat like
and for some activity and certain and they said those types of guns can also
be used in certain ways to steal information of credit cards. Blah blah blah.
Right, that's why maybe, So that's why you carry the ridge because
that way it protects all your information. So I pulled this out. I
pull up my license and I know that there is a clear image of me
in the license, and in this there isn't one. So how does any
any we brought that up? Yeah, but here's the problem we did.
I can't believe it. No, But here's the thing. I don't know
what they may not know that the New York State license has a clear picture.
So there is a there is a book that shows all the IDs.
Yeah, but we used to have it when my buddy's dad on a convenience
store, and it would show what the ideas are supposed to have and what
you're supposed to look for. You'd think, though, that likely he's probably
not the first New York student to walk into a bar. Probably Connecticut.
That's why that's probably not. But my guesses are just looking today to birth.
So my dad brought up because I did get arrested for a fake ida.
I was about a week, maybe two weeks from my twenty first birthday.
I was working midnight to six on a rock station in Poughkeepsie. It
was only supposed to be a summer job. I ended up taking the year
off from Fisher and staying for the year. So I'm driving home and it
was eight o'clock in the morning and I got pulled over for overdue inspection and
the officer walked up to my U you know, the driver's side windows,
a license and registration, and when I went I didn't have it out already.
So when I went to pull it out, he said, why do
you have two licenses? And I said I don't and he said, yes,
you do. I saw it. You have another one in there and
I said, no, I don't in my wallet and he said, okay,
well we can have a problem. He said, then we have a
problem. Either you're going to show me what's in there, or I'm going
to arrest you on the spot and have your car impounded. So it became
one of these things where you know how everybody says, and we talked about
it the other day. If you tell the truth, it'll be less.
But it's never been less. No, it's never been less. It was
like the time you caught me, Dad, skip in school or not.
You didn't catch me. I came home and I told you I skipped school
because you saw mister Tye at the thing, and then he called the school.
They did give me. Instead of three nights, I got two nights,
but he still got its attention. No one needed to tell anybody,
right, So in this case, the guy said to me, follow me,
so instead of impounding my car, I guess I did get a break.
Follow me to the troop Cake headquarters. So I went down there and
I get in and they fingerprint me. They mug shot me, and then
they handcuffed me to a desk. They had a giant ring like hard bolted
into the side of a wooden desk, and I'm mancuffed. I couldn't go
anywhere. I'm sitting there for a couple hours. So I think my midnight
to six shift went. I think I didn't get out of it three or
four in the afternoon, and then I had to. I think they called
me. I don't know if I was supposed to. My dad was saying
something about picking them up the airport. I think you were in the Grand
Canyon. Oh, but I thought there was a yeah and probably and then
so I yeah, I had a call and say I got arrested. I
got arrested for fake I did. That was that was the thing when you
graduated high school. Did they raise your dust to the rafters for your detentions?
No? No, it was with the top of his desk, with
the little I didn't have a lot of detentions. I didn't get I didn't
I didn't have a lot of detention. I mean I got into fun,
little mischiefous stuff, but I didn't get into detention things. But I did
do something that I don't know that you're aware that I did. Do you
remember when, because it was a funny thing. I snuck out and I
was going there was a party in a field like there were, yes,
but in Appalachia there was always there was always parties and fields. So I
had the basement that had put in the new so he finished a room in
the basement for me, and he put in new windows. And these windows
would fold in and drop down. So it was a warm night, and
it had to be June because your air conditioning was on and I was sort
of under your room, and I you had TV on in your room and
I could see it flickering, and I snuck out and I ran down to
char Will Drive, which was our road, which was really like a cart
path. If you look at these roads now. They were like cart paths
on a slightly wider than you would find on a golf course. And I
remember diving into the side of the road because a car was coming up and
I didn't want them to see me. And then I got down to the
end and there was another road, Hicks Lane, and I jumped over a
barbed wire, a rock wall and barbed wire fence. There was a cowfield
that I hid from cars there and then I ran and I had I had
put on Dracar Noir, which was the colone at the time. Yes,
it would be the axe. It was the axe of the day, and
from the running and sweating, I now had a cloud of it, so
I had, Yes, I mean, just if you could, it would
be like pig pen from and these Jeanine Matteo and Tara Sullivan picked me up,
but they had two guys in the back of the car and I get
in and it must have just riached because everybody's rolling down the window. We
went to the party and then we went all the way out to the Pleasant
Valley Diner and then I got dropped off at the end of char Will Drive
at about four four point thirty, crawled back in my window at five,
and at six o'clock or six thirty, you're pounding on my door for me
to get up up and study for my chemistry regions, which I didn't fail
once. I failed it twice. And when I got up, he said
to me, why are I some blood shot? I'll never forget it,
and I went, I don't know. I didn't say, well, studying
hard for chemistry. And then then you went about your date and I went
about fine. And you never knew did you ever know? No, never
knew that. Yep, I did do that. Go ahead. It's just
like my brother at the time he came home floor walk up tenement. Huh.
The bottom line was that he took the fire escape outside to throw the
sheets away so that my mother would have been drunk. Oh, that he
came and drunk and sick. Oh he got sick. Yeah, and he
went out the window before they got up. Yeah, all the sheets.
What white is? They just grabbed sheets and made the bedroom walk down.
Did he get it? He gets sick. No, That's what I'm saying.
To change the seats because he got sick. I don't know what means.
He threw up or something right on the cheat, or he went to
bed drunk. I just texted your brother to tell him that you were many
stories, and I said, if he's got anything kidding, he was not
as a perfect angel. I don't I think he was. Or they knew
by that point because Kevin used to knew the signs because of you. Well,
no, Kevin admitted to them. Kevin used to Kevin used to have
parties. He would dig a fire pit in the backyard, right, and
then he would lay the sod off to the side, and then he would
put it back. And my father didn't believe that he Kevin admitted it so
that he would have a fire in there and then afterwards he would let everything
cool down and put the sod back, and it would grow up. And
they never know what moment, Well, the backyard would flood. It would
get really swampy. At times. You go to the house for something important,
yes, woods and else. Yeah, mar doesn't like GAMESE or anything
else. It was just ca Yeah, I was just camping in the backyard.
You don't like this game them, But you didn't know I had parties,
lots of parties. You knew about parties. You knew about Kevin.
Yeah, yeah, you yours somewhere. Not all of them, there were
lots. There were times where I didn't have parties and people came in thinking
I was going to have a party. That was because I had so many
parties. And they drank all your cores light and then found my bb gun,
set the cans up on the wood burning stove. Now it's not home.
They got in because we didn't lock. They drank your beer, they
set the cans up. They've had target practice. I came home. That's
when I had to call a neighbor who was pretty cool, Tom Walsh.
Mister Walsh came and he dropped off too, twelve packs of course regular and
coarse silver bullet, and I had it. My parents weren't going to be
home to seven. I was working till four. I'd be home by four
thirty. Of them on the driveway and there already home, and mister watsh
was replacing the beer. But the bad part was again, I don't mind
getting caught for something I actually did do. This was another one. But
you can't explain that. How do you say I didn't do it? Yeah?
I know, right, you can't. Well, so I had a
buddy of mine whose father was a pastor. Yeah, and his parents went
out for the weekend. They said, no, no parties, no,
screwed down. This guy became a pastor late in life, so his kids
weren't raised with him being a pastor. He became a pastor because, oh,
I ran out of things to do, and I'm a Christian. I
don't have an education. I'll just become a pastor. God's calling me to
be a pastor. He's still a pastor of this day, by the way,
but his kids were already on the wild path at this point. He
goes, I'm having a party at the house, but look, you guys
got to help me clean up because if my parents find out, you know,
screwed. But think about stupid kids when you're growing up at Chatauqua County,
right, you can't just apparently I didn't I didn't drink. I was
the d D for everybody. But apparently you can't just have cans. You
gotta have bottles, and you can't just have Budwis or Jenny. Oh no,
no, we got to get La Bat Blue. It's gotta be La
Bat Blue. That's the best beer you can drink when you're right. So
we clean everything out right, And I was the responsible one. I was
the one who got everybody, got all the stuff in the back of my
truck, throw all the cans out, all the bottles, all that stuff.
Right, parents come home like nothing ever happened. I File takes a
walk through the backyard because he knows better, and all he had to do
was step on one la bat blue cap. You knew, right, there
was just one little and if they had just used cads, not bottles,
nothing would have happened. Well, I had never found out. I had
a small little gathering of people and it was February break. You guys had
count come up here to Rochester and we had anleom kitchen floor and we had
a cleaning lady named Pam, and Pam had just been there and people had
come through with their muddy boots and snow and all this stuff. So again
I called over to the Walsh household and I asked Caroline, how do you
clean a kitchen floor because I didn't know. So she came over and she
showed me and I went down. I mopped it, but it was all
like cloudy. You needed to buffet. So we had a buffing machine.
I pulled out. It starts peeling the wax off. So now I'm in
full panic. I don't know what to do. I so, Danny,
I got down on my hands and knees with a towel and I'm just buffing
and buffing and buffing that whole floor. And I finish up. I put
everything away, and I'm just sitting there in an income my parents with my
younger brother and sister, and they come marching in with their boots and my
mother does, I mean full stop, hands up what that kitchen floor?
Get those boots off. Pam has it looking immaculate and that way, Yes,
I got away with it. I passed the pan. It's not good.
It's Pam good. It was Pam perfect, perfect perfect. That was
the greatest Thing'd be a great advertising at least, you know, when you're
retired from the podcast business you can always I mean it was it was.
That was crazy because she did she had it perfect, like Pam would have
the place looking at as clean as possible. He had no idea and it
wasn't a lot of people, but it was money boots through there. Yes,
I was just thinking, but I didn't pay attention to a lot of
details because remember the pot story. Oh, one of my favorite Kevin got
into this fight, and so I'm in the kitchen with them, and I
hear them fighting, and he goes, I'm going to tell them I'm about
the pot. To find out about the pot, and I find out that
she had earned because she was oh, okay, one of my pots.
They buried it in the woods, probably a year ago or something. And
now he's gonna tell me she never noticed the pot was, remember, but
I was. I was so happy to hear. Yeah, right, it
was a pot. Yeah, that's fine. Isn't as strange? I say
this a lot. I am repeating myself, but we've done a one eighty
of marijuana from when we were kids, at least from when I was a
kid. I can't think of when you when I always like to ask people,
especially older like there was a ninety eight year old guy in here,
what is the biggest change, I say to you, if Grandpa ed came
back or Dad's father came back. Technology has advanced so much in the thirty
five years that they haven't been on the planet. It's amazing and I'm thinking
in my lifetime, sure all that stuff But what was the one big thing.
I think it's marijuana. For me. It was growing up near Woodstock
Pine Plain. He had a lot of the liberal people people. There was
kids that grew it between the cornstalks on a farm that the farmer didn't know.
They were selling it in school. Oh yeah, I knew a guy
who grew it in my backyard. I didn't know this guy named Pete Kruple.
He went in the woods and he grew it out of the on a
tree stand in my backyard. You just people did it right. My father
let him hunt him and his father hunt. Yeah, and then the property.
Yeah, so he so because he kept the deer population down, and
they give my father some imediication. Didn't car We had all these woods and
nobody to use them. So he goes back there. But so he takes
pizza out there, like sitting up trapping's harvest weed. It's haed and and
probably the purest thing. But that was the worst. I say again,
I could never as an adult. Now look back to my fourth grade class,
and I remember mister Brannigan came in and burned it in front of the
guest instead smell, go get a teacher him. Then to be the oddest
thing ever. But if you smell this, come find an adult. And
there were kids that were getting pulled out. Six raiders picked up for angel
dust I think in pine plains and some I don't know where they got it,
but that or at least that's what we were. The kids are smelling,
they know the brand. I don't know. We're the cheachen chuck.
That's pat about red. That's a pad of gold. Well, now you
need a restrict plane and some of this. But it's just so different because
it's almost become a health food. Not that it is, but I mean,
you know, you'll hear all the benefits, the benefits at least of
the CBD, maybe not the THC. My father, well, my father
was living with cancer. The Puerto Rican guy down the street like recruited him
to smoke marijuana to help him eat. Yeah, he goes, he goes.
A lot of people don't like what we're doing, but he's eating.
He's eating, that's the important thing. Yeah. Yeah, it was shoddy,
and I go, what is he talking about? Oh okay, all
right, now it clicks. It makes sense. Well, who does it
like it? I don't know what he was talking about that. It me
and my mother. I don't think she even knew. No, I don't
think she had any imna. No, I don't think you guys never did
any of that stuff until you went to visit me. That was one of
my favorite stories. Still the greatest ring doorbell video of all time. Well,
the ring doorbell video. That was my fault in a way, that
was your fault. Yeah, the ring doorbell where Mom fell off and I
said to you walking up because I had a gummy and I had some beer.
I said, I don't know that you should be holding up to me
walking up the hill at my brother's property. Yes, it was pre operation.
And we get to the top of the stairs and I'm holding the door
open and she yes, pulling it open. Did you step back? And
there was no step behind and she went over into the grass And there's doorbell
video of this that my brother said later we counted into assistance, we counted
didn't move for. But I think it was a nineteen Mississippi honestly for no
woman. Because Morgan first he set his beer down and then came down to
find you. Okay, beer beer was in perfectly good condition, and you
could have left like the chalk out where of her body in the moult cause
in the garden, that's where Kevin said, he goes, Mom, he's
stand by the fire. He is, Yeah, he doesn't know that he
sees and he said, I think there were angels out there that pushed you
to the side. Otherwise you would have been on the walkway, yeah,
which was all brick. And next morning the two of them show up and
I'm in bed. Two boys come walking in the room and they said they
had and I said, you took a video of this, but also we
have bad news. Jimmy buffetted that's right, that's right, Jimmy Buffett that
died that weekend. But uh, the the ring door. See, that's
the problem. You didn't have any of this stuff. You are in video
more now than ever before. But I did, Uh, I thought,
I Yeah, I was a little high, so I just put my beer
down. I didn't want to rush over and be all worried. I wasn't
sure if I'd make it worse. So I'm trying to sort this all out
of my head, which was very cloudy. And my sister in law was
right there. She was right behind you. She could have caught you she
didn't. Maybe she pushed you over. I don't know. Speaking of that,
we will call him and we'll do our YOUO mama off and I have
nice ones, I promise you. She was a little nervous this morning and
I sat down. I'm going to write some nice ones. So we'll get
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Plates and Shakes. Danny, did you ever play this? No? Never
never played. So Glenn Danzig's interesting guy because he's also written, scored,
and starred in some b horror films. Okay, he did a spaghetti western
type horror movie that I I forget the name of it, but you can
find them online. Cat's grad he uh yeah, but he's creative outlet.
And I think made some money off of it. I think people were buying,
you know, kind of got that B movie online. I don't know,
taste or whatever. Uh my mom is here and I think she's very
uncomfortable. You seem uncomfortable today. I don't know if I make you nervous?
Am I making it nervous? A little bit? I can tell a
little bit. Oh damn it, dan around all right. I got called,
Oh God, should I have not admitted all those stories? No?
No, no, sories are fine, all right. I mean everybody survived.
You know what I always think was like, I don't know that my
kids did that. I don't know that they had the opportunity because their mom
didn't work and they weren't you know what I mean. And when we went
away, we all went away together, so there wasn't really Sometimes we'd be
away and they'd be home. This is a very tight knit neighborhood, and
we had a very tight knit neighborhood. And it was a very different time,
as funny as it sounds because it sounds old fashioned, but it was
with the d W I and the laws and he who hoes, you know,
loses the most, and that sort of thing that you didn't You didn't
really have that we should ask him about when he wrote the note to the
to the family saying that if you see my son, do not admit him
to the party. Do you remember this? Yes, yeah, we'll get
We'll get Jordan to admit something to you on Father's Day. Jordan. I
don't know that they really did it. I mean maybe it'd almost be like
good. Yeah, I don't see Geordane doing nothing other than losing his temper.
That's it, his temper. Wait. Wait, wait, wait,
I'm calling the wrong guy. Damn it. You want to the number I
do. I was calling uh Staten Island Kevin, which is our cousin Kevin.
He's a mortician, which will be terrible. I should not do that.
Hey, can I prepay? Hello? Hello? Your your daughter was
saying, don't forget to call Chuck. She just texted me. Oh,
so we're on the do Oh down at you down on your on your pond?
Yeah job, Oh very nice. Yeah. Well well okay, here
we're sitting like we're in a compact car. I can hear you. Well,
yeah, I can hear you. So I got them. Okay,
So so that means your your mamas are going to be clean? Oh god,
no, did you see them? Did you see the roast of Tom
Brady the other night? I did? Oh God, that has nothing on
what I've wrote, which, by the way, Kevin, I thought that.
I thought the roast. I thought the roast me next year. I
thought that roast was one of the most reverent things I'd ever seen. And
I thought Edelman may have been the filthiest and the worst. He was pretty
bad, I mean bad is bad. No, he was really edgy.
All right, So Mom, you have to choose who goes first, me
or Kevin? Get first? All right, Kevin, Your mom's cooking is
so bad. Even the microwave tried to fake a power outage. That's mild.
That's pretty mild. That is mild. Your mom is so smooth.
Her hip replacement rides like it's on a permanent vacation. I heard your mom
entered a cooking contest in one first place for best effort. Your mam is
so independent, she got her adult children wondering ifully start asking her for life
of life advice instead. Your mom values education so much. She thinks YouTube
recommendations should come with a GPA requirement. Like that. Your mama so charismatic.
Charismatic even after thirty six years of marriage. She's single hands. She
single handedly keeping the dating scene alive and kicking in Rhinebeck. Your mom remember
when kids used to say your mom sold she knew Burger King when he was
just a prince. Well, your mom is so your Well, your mom
is, I heard Mallory laugh. Well, your mom is so industrious.
She was his career advisor. Your mom is so loyal. She's been cruising
around her old white conda long in the some marriages last, that's true.
I think she might have beat mine. That's true. Your mom is like
Wi Fi. She has the strongest connection when you're trying to hide. Something
made me laugh. I know your mom is so wise. She did advise
her adult children. That's so sought on. They think that she's got a
direct line to the universe. Oh yeah, well we went to a psychic
fair today. Your mom is so kind. She sends apology notes for her
spam folder. I like that. Your mama is so adventurous when she's in
Cape Cod for the summer, even a while I'll invite her for skin around
the back. Oh look at this. Your mom is so pretty. Even
her mirror takes a moment every morning to appreciate the view before reflecting it back.
Like that. You so passionate about speech therapy. She could transform the
bark of a rhymebeck dog into a flawless rendition of the Nazareth College fights on
Kevin, I think you liked. Yes, your mom is so fit.
Her idea of a cheat day is switching from kale to spinach, and we
know that's full of ship. Your mama's put a cool grandma. She's the
reason grandkids invented the term and my goal. Oh Grandma gold, I mean,
come on, think of South Africa. Yeah, leeping in the ice
hotel? Okay. Your mom is so fit and busy. Her fitbit once
surrendered due to overachievement. If it just flashed, I can't even and gave
up. So I like that. Now mouth's got one, okay, I
can't wait to get your mouth all right. Now here's yours. Your mama's
some scars that when we went to visit, two of my socks went missing.
You want to do your that's your Dylan do you want me to do
it for you. Yeah, okay, Dylan had this one. Your mom
is so curious that when she washed my clothes she wanted to jump into the
very good, very good. I think Kevin wins honestly. Yeah, that
fight, that Nazarath fight song one was funny. That was what was it.
We were purple stomach that this is coming. Oh, Kevin, she's
off, Kevin going Well. I sat down at the table and she said,
are you working? I said, I'm just writing, like yo,
mama off, But I was making I said they're nice. I made sure
they were all nice. I did write when they say, but well,
tears in the corner, that would be terrible. We sat here viewing the
video from your house from a couple of years ago when she fell. No,
it wasn't a couple of years ago. It was just past last September.
It was right before the Yeah, it was right before the hip operation.
Ye didn't bounce Poo's bounce? Nice. Well. I did write another
one that said, they say love is the secret ingredient cooking. Our mom
has been cooking with sibling rivalry because nothing says complicated love like her chicken pot
pie. Oh I do like that, A little long, a little long
wordy. So what and I do have one last night? Oh? Yes,
your mom was so savvy, even after thirty six years of marriage.
She's got a backup plan for every plot. To us, that was the
last one mart that. So what fun things happened up in Maine for Mother's
Day? What do we do? Guys? What do we do today?
We went we went to broad that the kids called. They called it all
you can eat, and they thought that we didn't have to pay, so
that was fun. What else did we do? Then? We were going
to go to a Portland Sea Dogs game, but then we got a little
late and we wound up going up to Portland and we hiked some like it
was kind of like a lighthouse, right observatory, So we hiked up and
then we went to a brewery and hung out for a little bit, and
then we came home and we did be fishing from the dock. Nice,
oh, very good, perfect day. Catch. We might go for a
walk. We'll see do you catch anything in the in the pond? Just
to lead, but the fisher jumping we're watching jump? Okay, what's in
there? Kevin? Just bluegills and sunnies. Are there something a little heavy?
We got a little large drop bass and there. Oh okay, how's
that new bike? Now you've gone five hundred feet on it. That's got
a beautiful bike. Picked it up. It's like, no, you can't
walk away and talk Hi, I'm here. It's very shiny, silver,
sounds nice. We've now got it and rode it up to our fence and
said, okay, I've got She wrote it she needs an e bike.
I wrote a nee bike today. It's I know I will never ride any
body shooter. I might ride scooter. Scooter Mellory, Yeah today an scooter.
They're like four hundred bucks. I was like actually tempted to buy one.
Yeah, Jamison's bike was like five hundred. These the one I wrote
today, you get to I don't know how they do it because it's all
electronic. This is what's weird. You can get a governor basically lifted electronically.
You just have to do sign a waiver saying that you'll take responsibility if
something that happens, and it'll go up to forty miles an hour normally it's
twenty. But then you get this and it's all through email, which is
the most bizarre thing to me. So there's a release, Like a day
later, you all of a sudden you get an email back saying, okay,
go up to forty miles an hour. I was thinking about starting my
own like uh scooter club, getting contacting the Hell's Angels to make sure I
had permission. I just wanted to thank both of you. That was that
was fun. Oh it was lovely. Oh good, it's over, your
great sons. Well, i'll tell you what this is how I felt yesterday,
Kevin. At the end of the night, I went, oh,
it's over. We made it. We're all good. That's great though.
And yeah, I think Jordan's card I got it in Friday, so some
week Yeah, okay, all right, good, then I'll have it and
he'll be with me. So don't even worry about that. But Happy Mother's
Day to Morgan. Yeah, and uh, enjoyed my candle. Bar burn
that candle? Oh yeah, you want to hear My Mother's Day to Morgan.
Yeah, I got this lovely lavender candle and it says burn this when
my son gets on your nerves too much? Completely all right, Well,
Kevin, thank you for playing with me. Oh he just sent a picture
of it all. Well, the rest of the day, take care you
by love you, bye bye. There you go, Grandma being grandma right
here on the podcast. By the way, I haven't heard the name Mallory
since the show Family Ties. Oh it's interesting. Yeah, I didn't think
about that at all. Names got lost. Yeah, well here's another one
today. Uh pearl Miles. No for a guy Miles? Yeah yeah,
so yeah, my dad's cousin son had a baby boy just the other day,
maybe Friday or Saturday, and uh named it Miles. Cool. Yeah,
And I wrote back, am, why l E s? And he
said, no, they're spelling m I L E S. But that Miles
is an old is a name you don't really hear a lot? Yeah I
didn't. I do know one Miles. That's your age. No, like
somebody might generate. Somebody from my generation friend from high school named their their
son Miles. Yeah, okay, newer, newer, yeah, starting to
come back, yeah, Jamison and uh Seamus was another one that seemed to
be coming back to with with different people. All right, well this has
been fun. Mars yeah yeah, were you really nervous about this? And
Kevin said, just wait, we had a lovely day today. I was
very nervous when we started out there was no one in. We were the
first people in mult Connery's. And then there's nothing new, well there was,
there was no there was that one of the other breakfast things, and
I have been both both and the same trip. No, but you know
what's weird, And this is what I don't really like, and I have
to say this. I go up to uh To. I wanted to leave
a cash tip and I only had bigger bills, so I was trying to
break it. And the manager comes and goes, oh, your sons were
in here last night, and boy were they tearing it up. And I
don't want to hear that. I don't want them to go to the same
bars that I go to. But they did Daddy's Bar. No, no,
And they've known Damien and and so Damien Jordan had bad food allergies and
I think he might have broken an arm or did something. And we were
going he and I went then to get dessert. We're going to get dessert,
and so Damien was walking out. We're walking in and he goes,
what are you getting? And I said, we're getting ice cream, and
he goes it's on me. And he went back in and Jordan had to
have like coconut ice cream which was more expensive, and all this stuff,
and he bought it all. But this is when the kid was like seven
or eight, so they've known him most of their cognizant years. They've known
him, and now they can go to his bardrink with him. I'm not
sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. That is the uh,
that is the thing. Uh. Because it is Mother's Day, we
are going to wrap it up a little early tonight just to uh so everybody
can go spend time with their mom. I was thinking we should call your
mother, but she wouldn't really appreciate that. Well no, I mean,
like so she would talk your ears off about why Trump is an awesome president.
No. I found out. Oh yeah, that's the other thing.
I found out that my stepdad might be running for like some type of county
legislature or something like that. Uhh yeah, my mother she delivers meals for
meals on wheels. Just they recognize me now they know who Mike and I
are. And you know, it's kind of a big deal now because he's
really taking it to him. He's a tea party guy. Like, oh
boy, tea party. He's a tea party guy. Tea Party's back.
Yeah. A bunch of tacer cow duel behind me the time, about twenty
years behind. Well, she Taqoa County was kind of like Pine Plans.
They wound up playing each other in the Class C state finals in basketball.
Yeah, twelve, and it was I think that's when what's his name was
on the basketball team went to Syracuse after that from Tyler Lighton Tyler like,
I think he stayed an extra year to play with his brother before he went
to a prep school, and I think he went into a sophomore and then
on Syracuse. Then played for the Denver Nuggets for a few minutes. I'm
not sure what he's doing now. At least they got to taste of it.
Yes, he did. Chautauqua County pine planes. Look at that small
dales where they have those uh you know those psychics. Oh yeah, oh
the lily Dale Fair, Yes. Oh. Stocker County is known for several
things. Lu see ball commissioner Roger Goodell, ten thousand maniacs. They're all
from Jamestown, Chautauqua Lake of course, where Paul Newman used to live a
house down. Yeah, and uh and me there you go forget that.
Yeah, I do. For Kevin who brought in the pizza. Thank you,
for Dan who uh, celebrating Mother's Day Day early, went to see
his mom. And then for Mom Marge he sat through being not even roasted
a nice y o, Mama, we'll might Or Dad who didn't even have
headphones to be able to enjoy the thing off smack back for him, That's
right, the smack off I Bill Moran will see you tomorrow.