Previously on Quest for Competence. Welcome to Fandanglus's Fantabulus Fandangulation Factory. Do you
know where gem is that will bring dead girl back? That's a simple,
workable problem. Demon embasement of Inn needs to be dealt with. This town
full of idiots. Let's go kill Demon, because otherwise we'll be stuck here
and probably turning to idiots too. Live, Laugh, love, and there
must be laughter before there can be slaughter. I moved to not let anybody
else on fire. A magical mace appears out of thin air, smashes down
on the oney's head, and explodes it like a grape. Hey, y'all,
I am Judy Black. I am an author of primarily Dungeons and Dragon
stuff with a little bit of whimsy and a little bit of bloodshed. My
newest module is Short and Sweet, which is exactly what the title says.
It is a funny, cute, silly introductory model for new players to Dungeons
and Dragons, so you can check it out on the d MS guild and
this Quest for Competence, I play Gigi. The Nicole Man's there, and
yeah, we still haven't found any competence though, so me, I beg
to differ. I find competence every day, just not here. I am
the one, the only, the r Car otherwise known as Rachel to my
friends, Rikar, to all these assholes. When I am not playing D
and D, I write urban fantasy science fiction. My latest, Deviant Dark
Dryads, is out and I even have to share that title with one Rick
gualtery But don't hold it against me. In the game, I play Hilda
Swington, the Druid with anger issues, and we'll leave it at that.
Hey, everyone, my name is Rick Gualterian. I play Moog frees Eater,
the eldritch Knight who does your mom all night unless she's an elf.
In real life, I write, I write several things, including Well Ill
right, Bill, the Vampire and the books that come after. So check
me out. Hey, y'all, I'm Misty Massey. I'm the author of
the Mad Chestral series of pirate fantasy adventures. And today in the game,
I am playing and we're Crow, the suave, sophisticated rogue who just wants
to get in your pockets or your pants. It's your choice one, not
pockets and pants I have. It's in my pants. It's efficient. I'm
John Hartness and I am the director of this musical mayhem. In real life,
I'm the publisher and founder of Falstaff Books, and I write multiple series,
including The Black Night Chronicles, Bubba the Monster Hunter, and Quincy Harker
Demon Hunter. My most recent release is the Bubba the Monster Hunter novella Wampus
Rumpus, mostly because I just wanted to call something rumpus. Let the wild
Rumpus begin, And you can let the wild Rumpus begin by getting out there
and buying my chit. When last we left our intrepid idiots, they had
battled an one and defeated it and jumped on it and a bear after being
a spider. Yeah, pretty epic. It was inspiring, awe inspiring even
yes. Well, now you are in a warehouse full of stores full of
rice and flour, and sacks of barley and grains and all kinds of crap
that people make food from, and a dead one m Moog not remember you
burn only to keep them from coming back, right or maybe that troll.
Either way, Moog will set it on fire, oh dear. Okay,
and even if not well, provisions provisions this town needs for for winter.
That are flammable, Moog will laugh as they starve when the snow comes.
Before the fire gets out of hand, Can I just cast tidal wave on
it? Sure? Um to tell the lovely people at home, what tidal
wave does? I mean? It's not the most creatively named spell on the
planets. It summons a tsunami. Not to be confused with my cat,
because why kill when you can overkill? Can understand that logic, anything worth
doing is worth overdoing. So yes, I can conjure up a wave of
water that crashes down on an area within a range of one hundred and twenty
feet. I can make it up to thirty feet long, ten feet wide,
and ten feet tall. But I don't think that'll be necessary. As
tempting as it would be to wipe all these horrible humans and their urban spawn
off the face of the earth. I will merely dump it on the flames.
This one's okay. And if these urban assholes starved by raping the land,
Moog and I might agree a little on that. Okay, a fire
has been started, a fire has been quenched. Now you are in a
soggy warehouse with lots of soaked weak and flour and rice and other stuff.
Is there a cask of wine that I can rescue from this madness? As
I crawl out of the soggy, wet singed basement. Sure, um,
okay, yeah, how big a cat? You know you've got your smallish
casks, but then you've got some You want a big cask of wine?
Or do you want something that you could actually maybe carry? I want a
big cask of wine, but I'm not crazy, so yeah, just one
out and carry under my arm is fine, but could always strap it to
dwarf. You're funny, lad, stupid funny. There will be no strap
it of casks, temmy ass. I'm not turning into an ass. That's
just putting it out there. Why don't we go get paid and be done
with this mess? Pay this good well paid an information, but we might
get something else. Well, yeah, let's return to a stupid fantastic person.
As you are walking out of the warehouse, a bucket has been dislodged
from the rafters by the tidal wave and it tumbles from the ceiling, landing
firmly on Trin Karen's head, rendering her unconscious. Oh no, at least
we won't be sold to for the next few hours. Let's take the wind
strap her two dwarf's back as well. I second this. Yeah, you
might be wanting to ask the dwarf she is not my problem, she's your
problem. You want to bring the saleswoman along, that's on you. Mhm,
moot issue. I gouge your clan uses dwarves as pack animals. We
worked unto death because there will always be more pack animals. Has never ever
encountered the dwarves of the ball Smasher clan. Oh, now take a look
at her relative heights here? Boy, oh, you want to play this
game any further? And then he pulls out the device that will trigger the
explosive strapped to your arm, crazy horned necromancer lady can can your minions just
carry the unconscious little one very well? Mademoiselle Conchy and gel can just arms
one gets the legs not doormove Mook has suggestion you could just kill her and
then bring her back and then she walk herself. This is also true,
But I'm trying to save spell slats so that I can do other things,
like like other things on fire. Later, I'm gonna need a bigger tsunami
mug will laugh watching this pathetic town burn m it would do if an okay,
okay, the sales woman and have a good nep nep that bucket?
All right? I guess we leave? So I suppose you would like to
move back to Fendinglis's fabulous watch about gooy have to yeah, yes, only
if you want to get paid. That little shop changes names every time we
blank, doesn't it? If we can change names, or we can wait
for hardness to flip through his notepath, which one I'm going for? I
guess approached the desk and be like only dead pass before winter winds come and
you starved to death. There was some slight collateral damage that may have affected
some of the yours, just saying it was a big one in a small
space. Oh dear, oh, oh dear, I entirely one's fault.
There were actually no dear, just a bear that we killed the one.
Could we please have the information really you sent us? I don't know what
you expect. It's still standing, The whole place is standing and not on
fire anymore. So you're welcome. My taxes are going to go through the
roof regardless. You have, in fact performed the duty that I hired you
for that is excellent, and yes, I did promise a suitable reward.
So here you go. He reaches under the counter and pulls out a sack
of gold. There appear to be about five hundred gold total in the sack.
And everyone give me knowledge, Arcana please Moog rolls in eleven nineteen,
for Gigi held the rolls of four. She is distracted by the horribleness of
this urban setting. Sure that's every bit as reasonable as anything else you could
come up with. Alrighty from at least I didn't say I was looking at
Moog's ass, but we know that's what she meant. Yes, so Gigi
and on were because you are well versed in, in one case the use
and creation of magic and in another case, stealing valuable shit. The two
of you sense that there is something out of the ordinary and perhaps magical about
the bag itself. Hmm. And then you notice that it doesn't seem nearly
heavy enough for the amount of gold that pours out of it. Moog,
No take unconscious friend, put her in bag. Problem of carrying solved.
No no, no, no no no. Well, as long as we
leave her leave her head sticking out, Okay, you want Moog saw it
off first. No, no, no, no, that would make a
mess and we'd probably have to clean it up. No no, no,
yeah, yeah, ding Dong, mister ding Dong, what is what is
up with this bag? Oh? Yes, yes, yes, yes,
but nothing, nothing extraordinary. It is merely a small back of holding.
I did not expect anything explodinary from you. What is the deal with it?
Yeah, you don't look like the kind of man who has an extraordinary
sack. Well, dear, I expect that. Were you of my preferred
um species, we could have that conversation. Are you saying you have a
problem with green girls? No, I'm saying I don't like tall women.
I like gnomes. Well, I can't blame you. Everyone has a type.
Um. You know, there was a really good village of mc Canada.
Just um, the population of men is actually thin there now due to
an incident, and you might find yourself getting very lucky there. Okay,
I don't want to hear about mister Dingdong getting lucky. Moog has suggestion.
Moog's uncle crushed Dwarf and Slaver used to like gnomes two. He would stack
one on top of the other, then use both at the same time in
a sandwich. No, no one on top of other m okay, so
what is what is up with the bag been before we start discussing gnome sandwiches.
What's the information on the gem of Foo Foo Foo Mark? First?
Oh god, I have a horrible feeling. I have just had a revelation
about that name. Really really just all right, okay, you got there,
though, you got there. I'm proud of you looking at cast Okay,
it took a while seconds before Gaultier. Wow. Isn't that always the
case? Not usually, from what I understand, usually the other way around,
But anyway it is. It is just a normal back of holding.
You put things in there and it opens a small interdimensional rift to basically a
storage facility, and then you reach back up and you pull it back out.
Don't put living things into the bag of holding unless you want them to
come out not living. That's actually a very effective way to get corpses,
you know, and it keeps them very flesh. Well, that's that's why
I said. We won't put her head in. Everything else goes in and
we just close it around her neck and it's just somebody has to carry her.
Her body ends up in a storage facility other dimension thing and her head
roommate. That's just asking him to be held by Moog at this point,
can we we've got the corpses holding the not corpse right now, moving along.
What's the information we need on the gem of fu Mark? Yeah?
Um. Also, I do also have a ring that I wish to bestow
upon you for all of your all of your assistance. Um, here you
go, and he stretches out his hand. He doesn't take the ring off
of his finger, He just holds his hand out in your direction. M
finds himself skeptical. You want us to pull your finger now? Well,
no, especially not you, mister face face, fister, whatever your name
is. I don't want you to hold anything of mine. But yes,
just slip the ring off my finger. Wog is going to take another Why
can't you slip your ring off your own finger? I'm going to say this
is not going to end Well, no, I can't. Actually, it's
a magical ring that um can only be Ownership can only be transferred by it
being removed by the new owner. Now, historically this has happened upon the
death of the previous owner, but generally because you have been so helpful.
I would like to grant you this boon and whatt detect bullshit? Uh,
that would be insight. Oh I'm actually good at that bullshit detector. Go
Hilda rolls a fifteen. Nothing he has said to you is untrue. Everything
he has said is accurate. We'll have a question. Yes, moo,
so rin rin cannot be bestowed unless somebody unless gifted. Yes, yes,
but what if you not off one finger? That would be incredibly painful and
work. I don't know, probably, but I want to finish the day
with the same number of appendages as I began the day, So that is
one of my goals. So if Moog were to put ring on same hand
that device attached to and then decide to kill dwarf who currently enslaving us and
blows arm off, no move would be rid of device and ring and then
be free to use other arm to kill dwarf. Look, I think you
should give that a try. I want to see this happen. Let's go,
Can I recommend my therapist? I don't know anything about devices blowing arms
off, and very little about your grumpy Where is the bleeping gem? Before
I lose it and somebody gets their arm ripped off. Who isn't me?
Well, yes, I don't know. I know where it was, but
I don't know where it is. The last I heard was that it was
at a It was at a temple of Tirana, the goddess of the thunder
lizards, in Ragafael. It's about four days ride east of here. Got
us some thunder lizards, Rafael. Fun, let's go give Moog ring.
Here you go. He holds out his hand, don't pull his finger.
Move it never ends. Well, no, no, no, we're not
going to We're not going to curss my friend. No, no, no,
Moog have planned for this. Oh boy, take it and he will
put it. He will put the ring on on the same hand that is
currently attached to the device. Okay, the ring. The ring shrinks down
to fit perfectly. Now, only one who can take ring from Moog is
one who kill Moog. And as long as Moog has ring, that means
Moog is unbeatable. I don't think that's how it works. That's not at
all how the ring works. But Moog is already unbeatable, so it's perfect,
Bog. It's when the fel you are unbeatable, champion. Of all,
I'm surrounded by idiot all fear Moog and the Ring of Power. Considering
the potato in your hand, I would not be calling anybody idiot. Are
you mocking my meditato? I would never mock me? Okay, So we
got to go deal with them. The goddess of the undelivero is anyone very
lucky? That bloodshed is fun? Sir? Those of you who are spellcasters
can make a knowledge arcana check to see if you know anything about the Ring
and Moog. You can roll that with advantage since you are in contact with
it. Rules in nineteen Apparently staring at Moog's ass helps hill the rules in
nineteen. Yeah, I just want to see what's gonna happen. That's an
eleven, though I don't care. I have a spell that can identify it
later, and I don't care right now. It seems to be it seems
to have a lot of random chaos energy associated with it, and it feels
like it could um. It feels like something that could be activated once per
day. Oh, yes, you will lead the activation word and that is
fendingless. Just concentrate on your hand. I'll turn the activation phrase and something
fendtastical will happen, fan dangles. Don't do it in here, you moron.
Roll me a D one hundred and here is the best place to do
it, honestly, the wrong way. I'm right next to him. That's
the problem. Alrighty seven, we're making it way to the door. The
misery. Moo likes the chaos. Roll me a D four four. Okay,
four extra legs spout from your pelvis. They're very thin and spindly and
not really good for much of anything. Yes, No, mo can stump
four times the number of elves to death and they will turning into a spider.
They will remain attached to you for four hours. Moog legs, your
movement speed is cut in half if they If they don't go away after four
hours, you really should see a physician. They are about currently about the
size of Moog's arms. Moog will turn to Hilda and laugh and be like,
try figuring out where Moog's asses. Now, believe me, I have
a homing beacon. Now let's go so. Yes, once per day you
may utter the word fendingelus and a random magical effect will happen. Excellent,
who likes us? Dear Lord I can't think of anyone in the party better
to be blessed with this ring. No, it's perfect. So are we
are? Is he hustling us out the door or I'm leaving? I don't
know what he's certainly done with you. Yeah, he's gone back to straightening
shelves and generally ignoring you. Let I want to I want to check something
real quick before we leave town. Um can I Can I hold the bag
of holding for just a minute with all the money in it? I assume
you can come with me. I'm not going to touch the money. Everybody
can come with me. I just want to see if something will fit.
Okay, okay, And so I take the bag of holding back. No,
I go back to the to the inn where the where I had to
sadly leave behind the giant cask of wine. Will it fit the Will the
big cask of wine fit inside the bag? No? Damn? Okay?
Well, anything that go the inside of the bag of holding is largely um
dimensionless. But what can go into the bag of holding is limited by the
diameter of the opening, which is about what you would expect from a normal
sack that you could carry around. Realistically, twelve to fourteen inches across?
Will the small cask fit inside? I mean a pony keg? Okay,
I put I put several small casks in. We have wine for dinner every
night for a little while. All righty, hey, I was being generous
and helpful. You guys doubted me. Can't imagine why they would have doubted
you. I can't either anything else you would like to do now? BP
is mostly filled with crap, right, there's like no action, yea.
It is essentially the It is the wish dot com version of a magical emporium.
Okay, I'm just going to give everything a very judgmental look and then
leave. As if pillage and murder is not an option, then Moog says,
let us get out of town. All righty, I mean words to
live by. Is there any pillage and murder to be had? Just asking
out of curiosity at the moment. Okay, then we should probably go and
find some thunder lizards. Alrighty. As you exit the Magic Shop and begin
making your way back down the main thoroughfare, you hear a sound coming from
an the alley between the blacksmith shop and the inn. You hear a sound
coming from this direction. It sounds like something where has sprung an intermittent link
leak? So what also? My cat keeps read me owing. Every time
I do that, I will approach it cautiously and hope it's not somebody taking
a piss. It is, in fact, not someone taking a piss.
It is a human female. She appears to be in her mid twenties.
Dark clothing, dark hair pulled back in a ponytail, and a somewhat grim
expression on her face. Sounds tasty. Tell me more, there's a woman
in the alley I'm getting there. Do you have a problem, perhaps with
your teeth or were you just trying to get someone's attention, your attention,
not just someone's attention, but your Most humans don't consider that. Why so
what do you need? You have met my sisters, and as I understand
it, that meeting did not go well for them. I point to the
zombie. No it didn't. Well, they were much better looking alive.
But yes, debt debatable. My leader, my employer, My employer has
a proposition for you. Not like that that kind well maybe, but where
smiles and sad at the same time. Later, that's a conversation for another
time. Excellent, Would you care to accompany me. Is it going to
be an ambush where they try to get revenge and kill us all? I
mean, just tell us then we can decide. Honestly, No, if
it were going to be an ambush where we killed you all, I would
have sprung it already. Oh. Sometimes people take a little time to set
up. I mean we did. I certainly wouldn't ambush you right here in
the middle of town. I would arrange a meeting and lead us off.
Okay, that's fair, dear lady. What what is your what is your
suggestion? What is this this proposition you want to make? I am I
am not authorized to. I have no friging idea. My boss just sent
me here to get you. And honestly, I don't care if you come
with me or not. But if you don't know shit, all right down.
Oh, she she is known? She she yes, we are.
We are an all female order of um, protectors of the realms. We
refer to ourselves as the Sisterhood, and trees only when absolutely necessary, or
to make a fire also necessary. But our leader is referred to as Mother.
So I sounds lovely and culty, let's go. So, yes,
I am to bring you to mother where she can discuss a potential business arrangement
and maybe give you information that your current employer has withheld. And she gives
kind of a dirty look to George the bailiff, who shrugs and gives no
fox. We should go and find out. Perhaps one of us shall adopt
the title motherfucker. It's been tried by um better elves than you, Moog,
not elf Moog need mirror. I would suggest you see this line of
discussion leaders to your mummy. Okay, woman who speaks strangely. Everybody want
to go with the creepy woman into the obvious ambush like going with her?
Annoysed George. Oh, George is very much not down with this. Then,
Moogo, if you try to leave, I'll have to blow your arms
off. I got very specific instructions that you're to go get the gem,
bring the gem back, then I get paid and I never have to see
your ugly faces again, except for except for you, Frenchie, you're kind
of cute. Well, thank you. But but George, if we've been
if we've been ambushed and abducted by this young lady, what's we can't help
it? You can't blame us for for being abducted by by superior force.
I think you like to roll persuasion for that line of bullshit. Okay,
because George so far ain't buying it. What is an arm when you have
as many legs as mooch? Oh yay, it is one woman here,
guys, we're not exactly having arm um. Yeah, with a twenty three
on we're George is like, fine, yay, thank you already, come
with us, dwarf, and we will see how best we can betray you
Them them them, Georgie, you do not inspire confidence. Mister, mister
face liquor, That's not his job. His job is to rip off faces
and eat them. Let's least keep him in his wheelhouse. This is his
clue. Fair, No, he done sense diplomatic mission. But here we
are. I mean, let's let's be real. It's a trap. We're
probably going to get into some murder and some mayhem, but we might actually
get some information about noting Rock. We have to get. Worse scenario,
evil demon woman winds up with more servants. I could eyes use him a
bad deal. That doesn't even sound like the worst case. I can think
of about a hundred worst cases but we're not dealing with them yet. Fine,
let's go walk into the trap. Think of worst cases too, Mostick
Moostick remembering like you know, in not whole with wasps. Great, how
app that's interesting. I've never heard of that. And Sta, can we
can we go see mummy? Please? Please? Begging you to this.
She looks horrifically disturbed and just doesn't speak, just nods and yes, come
with me. She leads you to the outskirts of town and into a large
mansion, and immediately upon entering the mansion, leads you through the great hall
and down a set of stairs to the basement. Why are we always ending
up in the basement? I think it has something to do with rising to
the level of your morality. That's okay, And where's walking with Moog?
Down the stairs? Going tonight over around the fire. I want to hear
more about this bees thing. No, if you're telling the story, I
might just for pure natural behavior curiosity. Want to hear it. Right,
We'll tell a story of when Moog was was a carefree boy with his best
friend Dug, and we would two things together. Wait, do you prefer
doing things with Doug? Because together side by side not together with each other,
not that there's anything wrong with that. Okay, we're gonna because didn't
scale right, to make everything look not insane. We're going to have a
little theater of the mind imagine fight. I'll have to figure some shit out.
But oh boy, challenge accepted. What do you mean if we start
a fight it she gonna start the fight? We ain't starting. Yeah,
she gonna make the offer. I love that blind feet that John has.
Oh no, I have two different I have multiple different, multiple different ways
that this encounter can go. One of them doesn't suck for y'all. It's
like doctor Strange when he's like I looked at like twenty seven eleventy billion,
and there's one we win. Ye all right, Well, I'm sure we'll
find some way to find that three millionth in one. As you, as
the sister leads you down the stairs, there's a woman sitting at a long
table. She is currently peeling potatoes. Woman, Okay, I am at
ease. She is a large human ish as far as you can tell from
the back of her head, but she's very tall and very broad shouldered.
Um you can see thick, thick muscled forearms, thick sausage fingers, and
she seems to be using a short sword to peel potatoes. We have come,
as requested, Ogre woman. Is this like Lady Demit rescue from what's
that game? Um? Yeah, feet, I have no idea what Lady
Demotas is, but a lady she is. She is in fact a half
Ogre. Okay, so wow, she turns and she's welcome. Welcome.
She puts down the short sword and the potato. I am mother. I
bow. That's adorable. I don't do humans. I always bring my best
manners. Lady, you and I can talk later. Greeny as you as
you had an unpleasant encounter with my sisters. We are the daughters of Arandus.
We are dedicated to defending and protecting women across the land and across the
dimensions. And your quest is currently running contrary to our mission. How that's
interesting. The man that has, for lack of a better word, hired
you is not, in fact the mayor of the town. He is not
the father of the sleeping lord mayor. He has murdered the Lord Mayor and
cast a spell upon his daughter. What he does not, what he did
not know, is that only a conscious effort by the rightful ruler can open
the wards on the town treasury. In other words, he killed the wrong
person and now he can't get the money he wants to steal. That is
very funny. Dead daughter must be a weak to open wards and treasure if
we wish to steal treasure. That is also accurate. That's not what we're
working towards here. But yes, the daughter must be awakened using the gem
of food mark. But if you give it to the man currently pretending to
be the mayor, he will simply murder her and leave her. And after
he forces her to open the treasury, he will murder her and use the
money to usurp her position fully interesting. I'm looking at George Wood not care.
Yeah, George shrugs. I got hired. I was hired to do
a job. You want me to not do that job? Don't care.
You're just going to have to beat what the other assholes paying me. Well,
what are they paying you? Seven? Would you take a five gold
down payment? Oh? Give the dwarf money. Look at looks ablutely.
As long as five of us as arms, we still have five arms to
kill him with. Just just to hear me, out here, just just
just let's go for the simplest solution that doesn't get all of our arms blown
off. First we pay him off, and oh, the condition is we
get these things taken off George, and then we listen to what these people
have to say, and then we figure out who we murder afterwards. I
mean, murdering a prick who took over a pinnacle of capitalism and pain sounds
pretty good. And I'm willing to pay off anybody that can take these these
devices off of us without you know, the hard way that is. Moog
throws throws a wink at the at the at the Druid. He's like,
oh, Moog thinks he understands. We paid Dwarf. Dwarf takes off arm
things, then we murder Dwarf and take back money. Moog, your inner
monologue is gonna take a little bit of work, but we'll use this as
a running theory. Just keep that in your head. The most fun I
have ever had with the group you are are just Nah, you're beautiful.
I'll tell you what, if you give me, I'll take the crap off
your arms and leave Dwarf one head start. Yes, the Dwarf wants a
head start, but or we can go do the thing for the guy.
I don't care. I'm just here. I'm just doing a job. Okay,
um mummy, excuse me, m what is your proof of these stories
that you say? I just am joyous. I don't particularly care, but
I am invested, like I am listening to the bud in the square to
know. What proof do you have that this man is not to heat that
HEAs That's a fair question. You know that it is impossible to actually prove
a negative. I can't prove that he's not if he's casting something like a
disguise step, you know, And that's very simple. You just counter counter
spell it, or you dispell it. The spears have a certain dilations,
and right now people were not of spelt. It's very easy to prove if
someone is using a disguise if you are aware of that fact. He's just
a liar. He doesn't use magic to disguise himself. He's just a liar
and a murderer of course most men. Well that's true, but how does
he look exactly like the other guy if he's not using magic? Towns people
stupid? That is very polar point. Yes, mister what was your name
again, face eater of i Gouger Clan. Yes, mister face Gouger is
absolutely correct. Everyone in the town is stupid, everyone except the sleeping daughter.
She is very intelligent. Okay, who believes Ogre not lie human lie
dwarves lie elves lie trust Ogres. But she's half human. So bullshit detector
is going on. Probably half that not talking. Role perception detector is going
Yeah, can't really insight works, You can't really pick anything up. Yeah,
the half human half Ogre and Ogre's pretty are simple and don't lie,
but the human power makes me suspicious. Misty, you think the same thing
with a fourteen. It's probably you can't really tell. And Gigi, you
can tell that there's a lot of truth to what she's saying, but there
are some things that ring bullshitt ish to you, specifically the part about the
entire town being full of morons. Actually that was the part I believe the
most. That's fair. Yeah, so you're fairly confident that she at least
believes that the guy isn't really the mayor and that he has trapped the rightful
heir to the throne and needs the gem to get the money. You can
crush back around to the part where we can get these devices taken off of
us for a mere five hundred gold, and I'm willing to throw in a
hundred of my own actually move as questioned, that has not been answered by
Ogre woman. Is that down paying us? What Ogre woman beaying us?
I suppose this is not the time to suggest that you would do this just
because it is the right thing to do. No, that is a polar
That is a poor suggestion at this moment in time. I mean it is
helping an urban hell escape, so I will need some compensation. Fine,
I have been authorized to pay a ransom from our stores, and you may
keep the gem of food mark after it is used to awaken the mayor's daughter.
Good am, I am on board. I love helping women, me
too, and it mood likes hurting dwarf. Hey, laddie, I'm just
gonna leave. There's no need for violence. Yes, we can give Jogie
them any he can go at their new life money, take off the arm
bands, give the money. Restrain Moog, I'll try not to get too
excited by that. And Moog is okay, Moog will nuts. We'll not
harm dwarf. Now Moog enjoys the thought of hunting dwarf. When Dwarf is
sitting there in tavern drunk, having spent the gold, and then he will
look up and the last thing he will see will be Moog's boot descending upon
him, which boots. Though you have a lot of legs, now that
they have boots, four of them, do not four? Did they rip
through his pants too, leaving delightful holes for later? Yes, we're not
going to comment very much on whether or not moogs holes are delightful, but
these are magical legs, so they just kind of magic their way through the
pants and you won't know until the legs are removed or fade away whether or
not they left holes behind in his pants. Right now you can't tell because
delightful holes no less, whether or not they're delightful will be entirely in the
eye of the behole. But that foreshadowing. Now, great, you have
too many writers in this group. We just think, all right, and
that's a very h that's a very wife foo beholder there it is. It's
the bestest, cutest I have one of the super pink, super adorable,
very wife food bad lives on my desk. Yes, all of and all
of the weaves watching now are and all of the weaves listening are like,
wait, we can see this. Yes, YouTube kids, YouTube, Yeah,
but yes, let's them. Let's pay the dwarf for you the arms
and then um, mummy, do you know where as the gym is?
We've gotten like we last sight over here? But I mean that's not very
involved thunder lizards, which sounds both erotic and a knock obnoxious. Yes,
yes, rackafail, that is the last That is the last place anyone heard
of the gem being located, and it is in an ancient temple two the
goddess of thunder lizards. Yes, okay, that tracks. Hey, George,
do you want didn't you have an affair with the daughter of the maybe
lizard person Infiltrator? Dude? Oh, I can either confirm nor deny.
I'm just saying, once you're free of this and we're are paying you,
wouldn't you like to just sort of come along and see if she's okay and
also not give Moog a chance to hunt you It just arouses him. Yeah.
No, okay, I'm thinking that. I'm thinking that as soon as
I get Shetty your crew. I'm getting on a boat and I've heard good
things about Caldern' that's where I'm headed. It is, it's lovely over there.
You realize you just declared your destination in front of the man who wants
to hunt you. Does no one have an inner monologue? You're realized,
I'm not currently on a boat, so I might not be going where I
set him going. But I wasn't going to say that Tomog because he's a
moron. And if I tell him I'm going to Caldern, he's not going
to think that I'm not going to Caldern. Of a psychology of realize not
right. Let's just get this and just not speak your language. Well,
we'll trying to be insulted by such things. You might not speak my language
well, and you could be a marn There's no reason you can't be both,
son. I don't know that your capable holding two different thoughts in your
mind at one time, but a lot of us are up. Kay.
So here's if I found good visual and now you you before I give it
to you, take off the arm thing. He pulls out the controller from
his belt pouch, flips a switch, the glowing lights on the arm bands
go dark and they pop off. Then George drops the controller on the ground
and stomps on it. Yeah, see, I knew what you were thinking,
their moogie boy. You were gonna put those little bracelets all over me
appendages and then blow me up to pieces from on his extra legs to see
what happened. No, Moove actually was not thinking that at all. We
just you've had and where was now? You can have the bracelets. I
don't care what you do with them. I got some money, you know
what. We don't even need to call it a down payment. Five hundred
gold is good. I'm out of here. George turns around and heads for
the stairs and nopes. Write the f out smarter than all of us.
That's a low bar. He waves over. He waves over his shoulder.
Thanks, Frenchie LoVa mean it bye. I hope I never see any of
you again. Yes, you said that now, But who's going to defend
you? In dark and evil forests? Well evil to city water from I'm
a d water from Auron. What do you think I'm going to be in
a forest far? I'm going back underground, fuck all this sky and on
a boat. Who knows. So mother looks at looks at you. I
assume that means that you have chosen to accept my offer and are now going
to work with us too. Free the mayor's daughter, and she had a
name. It seems a little disrespectful to dis continuously as a position in relation
to a patriarchal figure. Isn't that a little low for a group such as
yourself? You know, I just thought her just dead, stupid human girl.
That it leads to her own inogue. Remember that is not as a
possessive I too would like to know her name, her lovely, lovely name.
Her name is Mikayla Tayla. Yes, make note of that, Mitchell
h or something. Thank you. You know I get annoyed. Continue to
refer to her as dead human girl if it makes you feel better, mood,
I'm not going to be judgmental. Even though you are a male.
She's letting you get away with all kinds of thing. You had a mail
in that group, because I have his corps right there's poutful like Gali is
right over there holding to keen. So you had a mail in the group,
so breeding stock or cannon fodder. It was really good cannon father lost
dost Do you speak owlbeart? I do as well. Yes, yes,
Sometimes after they have outlived their usefulness, they can find new usefulness living.
See Gigi understands that men have their place. Sometimes it's prone and sometimes it's
wandering around carrying heavy things. We can do other useful tasks too. But
who understands all about need for children? Once once father Naul gut Spiller burnt
the village of Elves, and he took their child children, and he adopted
them. And for years he raised children as as his own. They wanted
for nothing. And then finally, when the children loved him enough, he
pushed them all off a cliff and laughed as they screamed, why father,
Why? It was very fun night. It's like we go to the same
parties. We'll talk later, all right, there's many daddy issues to unpack
here. Yes, I just leaves them into the box of Ziah. We
did touch them. I think this is a good use for that bag of
holding hanging from your belt. Yeah, you can fit lots of daddy issues
in your bag of holding. To a company you on your journey, I
would like to ensure that we have some way to communicate, and for that
I will need to send along with you one of my sisters. Is anyone
going to strap something to us that will explode? Well, whatever you want
to strap to whatever is entirely your business. I'm not going to judge.
We all have our needs. Button. It's not part of her instruction.
She is just to lend aid, to render assistance, and to report back
to me when the task is complete and we can offer you your just rewards.
That doesn't mean anything nearly as nefarious and terrify as I now hear that
sounding. Yeah, I'm a thank you, but you're sounding a scarier than
the people who started us in jail. So can we file it back a
bit? I like it? Sorry about that. Sometimes it's the ogre.
Sometimes my sometimes I just need to threaten to murder somebody I can understand.
Have you tried therapy? I murdered my therapist, so yeah, it didn't
didn't help. I tried No, not her. That's fair. I would
like for you now to meet sister Georgina. A little bell and a dwarven
woman clumps down the stairs. Son of a bitch, I'm no laddie.
I'm not the son of a bitch. I'm the bitch herself. She has
a holy symbol hanging around her neck, a large hammer, a shield strap
to her back, and is dressed in heavy armor. She has a long,
graded red beard and looks like your average grumpy ass dwarven cleric. So
we now have upgraded George. You now have an upgraded George. We stay
here tonight or we leave now. You are welcome to remain within our my
domicile for the evening. We can we can let clean, we can stable
your mounts. We can provide you with a good meal, soft bedding.
Sure potatoe. See she has, She shows him with a mash him stuhm,
toss him in a pot potatoe. I think staying would be nice,
you know, and have a nice long rest is always appreciated by the spellcasters
of this group. Absolutely. I'll offer up a cask of wine to share
with everyone. Label that looks familiar. I'm pulling the label off real quick.
What label? I see the label? Fair enough? Neither do I.
I will see you in the kitchen. Georgina will lead you to rooms
where you may take your rest. You may bathe. She looks pointedly at
Moog with this not in the blood of your enemies, mister mug, but
in water, perhaps even with soap. So we will meet. We will
see you in two hours at dinner. Are you telling me there is an
opportunity for Moog in a bath whicher style. I'm just saying, is it
possible. Let your imagination take you. Anything is possible. Um, you're
a little tall for a enifer, but sure, go for it. You
can. You can toss a coin to your whatever the hell Moog is moo
again, he'll sitting in a tub. Alrighty. You're led to a set
of bath a set of bedrooms. There is a there is a pair of
large bath bathing rooms one. There are no gender designations on the bathing rooms,
so you'll figure that out amongst yourselves. You have a nice dinner,
You have a nice long rest. All of your hit points are restored,
all of your spell slots are refilled. Yeah, then you can take time
to study your spells, freshen up your walking corpses, and do all of
those things before you embark upon your trip to the Temple of the thunder Lizards.
I'm totally turning into a spider and sneaking in to see if I can
get my witch or moment. First thing I'm gonna I'm gonna be Fendinglis and
see what I get other than legs. Your legs do fade during dinner.
They just they did, in fact, leave delightful holes in the pants.
Um. We will roll for We will roll for flashing at the beginning of
the next episode of Quest for Competence. But as you all know, just
because the game session is over does not mean we're done. It does mean,
however, that we will now take your questions. And because our patreon
patrons at off patreon dot com, authors and dragons pay for the privilege,
they get to cut the line. So Rick, all right, roll that
beautiful being footage. We do not have a whole lot um. But our
friend Zach of all Treys asks what kind of explosions does your character like best?
I feel like g should answer that one of the game because we originally
asked right before fourth of July, So all right, someone else go first.
Audience this one. This one is easy for moog ones that involve elves
and we're like explosions of love. Just you know, anybody calling lightning upon
the infidels who would defile the land. Yeah, I don't think those are
explosions on we're as much as they are expulsions. Bulshit explosion. It's close.
Yeah, I was say, there's is there, like, you know,
an ancient like you know, uh, website called porn tavern here or
something. Probably I don't know, but I'd like to know about it,
he would, he would. Yeah, there's a you'll have to cast a
special kind of scrying spell for that, bad boy. I think Gigi,
even though she doesn't have a lot of the use spells, is basically super
cooling something and then hitting it so that explodes, leaving the bones nicely intact,
but the meat gone. Dang explosions are her favorite way. It's both
necromancer and pitmaster, you know, because the whole rotting process is very slow
for zombies and and yet and boiling a skeleton to like you know, yeah,
that's I mean, you could waste a whole night doing that. Yeah.
Well, and there's problems with stat pockets getting into the boat ownes and
causing them to be brittle. Yeah. You know, I've spent a lot
of time learning about taxidermy, so on the flip side with that one method,
plenty of soup stock. That's true, that's true. Oh damn on
long fork, delicious lung book. George's preferred method of explosions are honestly drunken
flatulence. He doesn't actually like blowing up people's arms. He'd rather just get
drunken fart a lot. We know him now he can go get drunk and
fart a lot. And oh we get upgraded, George. Yeah, our
limbs. She just met you give her time. I need to write down
that. My next corpse has to be named Georgie. M hm fair,
all right, we got another one, Rick, sure, Actually another one
for our friend Zach. What's worse When the GPS comes on right before the
big solo in a song, or right in the middle of it. Oh,
right in the middle middle, you're in the zone, and it's like
we're halfway turn right, Yeah here I am getting yes, agreed, Yeah,
gotta be in the middle. Gotta be in the middle. It's it's
like coite us interrupt us. Yeah, I mean everyone, There's nothing like
blasting out bon Jovi or something in a car. You know. The worst
thing was when we had the free Serious for three months when we first got
our card and it it ended dead smack in the middle of interstate love song.
I'm sorry, that's a sin. Oh my god. I don't interrupt
interstate love song for nothing. But that was really smart on their part because
it made you want to It made you think for just a second, God
damn it. Oh yeah, oh yeah. It's like when you get a
phone call in the middle of a song. I'm thinking, like you know,
with like you know, with John's example there, what if you're rocking
along to a song in the middle of getting RoadHead there and suddenly it's like,
traffic stop ahead my favorite announce So it has to be like a road
kill announcement because that that anytime ways makes that announcement, which I heard a
lot over this weekend, was always startling. Road Kill ahead was like I
literally I saw my first up close road kill yesterday, like really up close.
Why were you? Yeah, because a raccoon got poon onto the sidewalk
while I was walking, and I'm just like, oh god, oh god,
oh god, Thank goodness. It was insta dead because I didn't want
it was the biggest raccoon I've ever seen, and it was like right in
front of me, and I just didn't know what to do. And yeah
otherners ago and your first one. Really because we see dead possums every twenty
minutes my own roadkill. Yeah, it's not common. I mean occasionally there's
a squirrel or something, but this was a full recently bunked raccoon that mercifully
got insta cranium hit and just up and died. Because I was like,
what the Because if a raccoon is out in the day and running straight for
the street, it's probably rabid. Now I'm thinking that this is like the
first in a long line of Witch's kurches that like Rachel has got so every
time she goes out and increasing the large animal is just gonna get hit by
like a bus in front of her. Like tomorrow's O the water buff up
and died in India. That was that was more scary, but it wasn't
quite as close. Yeah, eventually it's black bear versus Pinto, and then
Rachel's just sitting there watching Pinto grumpy bear, and that will be the time
to run. Just Yeah, I do live in a very urban environment compared
to most of you guys, so if there's a black bear, we have
bigger problems. Why is it theres the road in the middle. I live
in the middle of a city and a deer ran into the side of my
car on the interstate. Yeah, seven lanes of I seventy seven and a
deer runs into my car, the driver's side of my car. So that
thing either got across four lanes or it got across three and then was heading
backwards and made it a cross two more and then headbutted my car to the
tune of close to six grand in damage. Yet it worse though, or
did the deer walk off? Shit? If I know, it's the middle
of the night and I was trying not to die as a deer headbutted my
car right in the driver's side door. Yeah. By the way, there's
apparently a lot of sensors in new subarus, so anytime you uh take pieces
off and put them back on, lots of recalibration employing similar with my old
Saturn. I was driving down this road and a deer ran out and I
swerved and basically the side mirror spunched it in the face. But it was
a Saturn, which were pretty much just all made of Frisbee plastic. So
yeah, so I'm surprised you weren't just like sitting then on the asphalt in
the driver's seat, and everything else was like one of those little cars back
when we were kids that you could put them together and crash into things.
The car would blow up and and I literally mean Frisbee. P I mean
you ever trying to destroy a Frisbee? This Saturn, like, I can't
tell you how many things I hit with this Saturn's bumpers, and like this,
the bumpers never even got so much as like a scratch. Yeah,
my mom had a Saturn, And it's true. You could bump into anything
and the bumper would just like that is kind of what bumpers should do.
Yeah, I mean maybe if everything was wrapped like bumper cars. I was
great. All. I tore off the fender on that car because I hit
a tree back and out of my driveway, and I replaced it with literally
duct tape, a new record for tangents. On right. I was about
to say, I dented the gymnasium building at the at the preschool where I
used to work years and years ago, with identity with the school van and
I did and tell anybody, and I recently drove by and it's still dented.
That dent in the building is still there, so I never told anybody
it was me. But now now, now people, and that would be
so all right. I want to do one more from discord and then we'll
jump over to the Book of Faces. That's good, we only have we
only have one more. Well, there we go. Friend Kyle, the
goof asks, what is something or someone your character would want to declare independence
from my lust for Elvin flesh? In so many different meanings of the word.
Yeah, yesterday i'd have said I wanted I would like to declare independence
from the nasty little Bengal on my arm. But I got it, so
yeah, yeay, now you can declare it. I have to cleared independence.
Some lily mook doesn't like taking orders from a dwarf. Well, Mooke's
gonna have a rough campaign. We just like, is there a like cloning
factory for no matter what, one will appear somehow. Maybe don't know.
Maybe it's like the Doctor Who of dwarves. They don't keep recasting them.
Yeah, it's sort of like how you can't tell the difference between a male
dwarf and a female dwarf because they all have beards. They're all also named
some form of George. I'm surprised, like John, you didn't have them
like walk out and like walk back in with like a wig on and be
like for all you know he did. It could be very good at disguises.
We don't know. Also, none of you were all that bright.
Hey, I resemble that remark. Yeah, but I'm very perceptive when I'm
not looking at Moog's at look gigs. Very smart. She just doesn't care.
Someone just described the entirety of my high school career looking at Moog's ass.
Yeah that too. All right, let's see what we've got on the
book of faces. Now. If you want to participate in some of these
Q and A sessions, but you would rather do it face to face,
you should hurry on over to Authors and Dragons dot com and get your tickets
and hotel reservations for authors in Dragons Con twenty twenty three this August in Portland,
Oregon. Tickets are selling out fast, so get your ass on over
there. This has been your friendly weekly reminder, Misty. Well, you
know it's funny you should say that, John, because Stephanie Taylor wanted to
know are there any must sees in Portland for the con us us. I
think I can tell that Judy and I have been friends for a while.
Yeah, I mean there's Voodoo donuts, which are legendary. They probably maple
bacon donuts. Somebody needs to bring me that shit, I know, right.
They also have really good vegan donuts. Oh, one person here.
Yeah, I've never been out a donut donut eggs, eggs, milk,
butter, and some of them used like fat for some bacon on them.
Yeah, yeah, okay, fair enough. Bacon donuts, probably not vegan,
probably not. I can miss the legendary wooster vegan donuts that are no
more. They were so good. Yeah, I never had to worry about
getting sick eating them. They were really really good. This sound very good.
I've been to Portland, but it was many moons ago and it was
purely for a work trip, so I didn't see anything in Portland when I
was there, so I have no idea other than us. Isn't there an
amazing bookstore in Portland? I'm sure lots. I think Powells is in Seattle,
Okay, that's what I was thinking of. I don't know where Abe
Books is. I think they're on West I'm sure there are solid comment leave
a comment, leave a note in the comments, or post a note on
our Facebook page, and next time we will report back with your best options.
One of you is in charge of looking that up and making a note,
because I'm not going to do it. Yeah, please let us let
us know what we should do in Portland, because I think the majority of
us have never been and have not much of a clue what to actually do.
So yeah, other than hang out the bust and hang out with y'all
exactly, which is why you're going all the money anyway. So I'm just
supposed to be going off campus. You're supposed to be following the authors and
dragons around in adoration and bringing them ciders when they look thirsty, So yeah,
that that is good. Or Starbucks like I was brought during recording,
exactly exactly. Well, then our other our other question is I am going
to miss this name up and I'm sorry, but Jamin's Stack or Steach.
I'm not sure. Please forgive me because I don't know precisely how to say
it, but I tried. UM wants to know what is your biggest hope
or your biggest fear. They do not ask whether it's our character or us
so go nuts. My what a big question, I know, right,
winning the lottery biggest fear not winning the lottery. I don't know after hearing
what happens to lottery winner credit, like so many of them end up dead
and miserable within just a few months. You know, we're all going to
end up dead regardless. And Rick already lives in Jersey. Yeah, I'm
I've tried poor. It sucks, I'm willing to take more. I'm willing
to run the risk of trying rich. Rich and miserable would be a new
flavor. Yeah, if it sucks, I'll be more than happy to admit
it afterwards. Let me try it first, though. I'm even okay with
winning the lottery when it's only like twenty million. I'm fine with that that
you know, you know, you know, you only get like five million,
which it sounds really however, I love if you ever want to be
horrified, just watch some documentaries on lottery winners and I'm like, nope,
I'm quite happy being poor in comparison. But see, the thing is,
most of them did dumb stuff, you know, like that one guy Ike
carried money around every Yeah, almost everyone who wins a lot has done dumb
stuff with it like there's very by definition, it's a penalty for being bad
at math yea, so specifically probability. Right. The trick is to have
a plan, like you know, like like I was, I was.
I was talking to my oldest the other day. I was like, you
know something, if we're wins something like the powerball, we set aside a
million as this is our pissing away cash to get it out ofverse system.
Everything else, though, either goes in like you know, new house,
I'll paying off bills, everything else and goes away and know you do not
touch it. I a whole lot more. I need a whole lot more
pissing away and getting it out of system than one million bucks will get me.
So John will wind up on that next that next documentary, see I
already. I have a friend who's a lawyer. We used to go to
the USC games um and tailgate together back in the olden days before my son
was even bored. That's how long ago this was. But he and I
have an agreement, I right, And he and I have an agreement if
I ever win the lottery. He's my first phone call, so you know,
I'm I've already got a lawyer already on standby waiting to be my lottery
lawyer. So and nobody literally get a lawyer. Yeah, like I think
the first will be late to call it my cell phone provider and cancel everybody's
phones so we can cancel internet. So we were pretty much locked down until
we get this ship settled. Yeah, I actually say, do you lock
all your social media? You find out if you can report anonymously. Most
lotteries do not allow you to do it, but if you can certainly do
that, and then basically you cut off ties with everyone. You lock everything
down, You change all your forms of communication, contact a lawyer, go
collect your ticket, see if you can do it as long as possible to
prepare, and then just be a hermit, get your goat farm, go
away, and uh yeah, where you only pull out four percent of the
totally cheer because even in a terrible market, the interest you will earn will
repay yourself and effectively you can live in a perpetual motion money machine. You
can also do it by investing wisely in the stock market and bonds. But
my accountant side is coming out, and I will just keep talking swash,
I will I will just go on record and saying, oh, like you
know, we're joking on. But my goal if I had, like you
know, if it was enough to like live on, that's one thing,
But if it was like an insane amount, like a powerball, my goal
would be to take a big chunk and try to do something good with it,
like make the actual try to try to do what I can so that,
like on my deathbed, I can be like, yeah, I left
the world as slightly better place that I found it. I've always thought it
would be ever so slightly. I've always thought it would be fun to take
the money and take some of the money and invest in all of my friends
small businesses, but do it anonymously so they don't know it's me, and
either that or make them sign an NDA so they can't tell anybody it was
me. And so all of a sudden, everybody I know is like super
successful. Nobody knows why. It's funny because we've all we've kind of been
watching this happen with Magic the Gathering the past couple of weeks. If you
watched the side quest I did with two of my magic buddies, there was
a multimillion dollar bounty placed on one magic card on the ring, the one
of one serialized one ring. Wow. There was a standing offer before the
set even released of over two million dollars. Wow. Well, it's been
opened, it's been opened, it's been authenticated, and apparently the guy that
opened it works two jobs and drives a forklift for a living and bought one
random pack of cards and probably changed his life. Now they've done a good
job of keeping him anonymous. Yeah, he's Canadian, I think. Yeah,
they have I think different rules on that kind of stuff. And there's
a shot the game store that he frequents. They made an announcement, Hey,
we know the guy. It wasn't sold here, so I'm guessing he
bought it at Walmart or something. Yeah, but like, yeah, it
wasn't sold here, But we know the guy. He's a good guy.
We're and we're keeping his name quiet. Yeah, some rando, which is
good because everybody expected some influencer to open it or one of the big stores
to open it. Yeah, someone who bought you know, three hundred packs
and very Charlie and the Chocolate Factor August. But I was thinking it spent
like thirty five or forty bucks on a Walmart or Target or whatever they have.
It's not equivalent in Canadia. No. No, he was walking home
from work and he looked down and he saw an old golden dollar coin in
the sewer, and he picked it up and he bought a pack of well
okay, maybe a five dollar coin or whatever the world needed, like a
TV. With that, It's like, yeah, I found it. I
don't like the stupid game. Now, the question is who's gonna buy it?
Yeah? Right, because if there was an offer before it was released
of over two million. The only reason you're going to prem with an offer
that high is if you expect the sale price at an auction to be significantly
higher. Sure, so we're talking about the most expensive trading card ever printed
at this point. Yeah, oh yeah, I think because I think the
one that Logan Paul bought. I think he paid half a million for that.
What it's a yeah post Malone paid eight hundred grand for a magic card
that isn't even playable, isn't even legally playable? Wow. Now, I
wouldn't and I wouldn't be surprised if one of the two of them didn't end
up with it, because they're both got stupid money. And they're into collectibles.
That's kind of part of their whole thing. But yeah, wow,
my those would that would be my first two. That would be my first
two people I reached out to would be Logan, Paul and Malone because I'm
like, yeah, my numbers five be interesting to see bucks. Yeah,
not exactly, all right. So that brings us to the end of this
episode of Quest for Competence. Please join us again in two weeks where we
find out what Moog tries to set on fire next, and in the meantime,
join us for join us next week for a side quest, and don't
forget to go buy all our books and pick up your tickets to Authors and
Dragons con and tip your waiter. They work hard for their money. By
Authors and Dragons brought to under Creative Commons license, meaning you were free to
share this material so long as credit is given to those who created, which
is us. People you just heard to play the game opening and closing themes
performed by the Gore Core four