Hey, look, hey, hey everybody, Hey, welcome to this Knock
Kang podcast. Sween he's still dead, he's still missing. He's being vigorously
touched on as we speak. Yeah, strangers beyond our control. I got
a I got a ransom video. Oh did yeah? Yeah, he he
was you know, it showed sweety on his knees, you know, bound
gagged with an apple. Of course, he's beaten, bloody, and essentially
the guy, you know, using one of those voice distortion things, was
like, I want and I'm be honest. The voice, even though the
voice was distorted, it was a little I could tell what region it was
from. It was somewhere in India, and he was just like, if
you want, if you want this guy back, I'm gonna need a fifty
dollars gift card to Amazon, and I'll be honest. Yeah, no shot,
not worth Yeah, no shot. I'm not spending fifty dollars. Yeah,
kinson back. Yeah that's that's no shot. Yeah, it's not worth
it. But I wish him yeah, sorry, hopefully. I mean,
I know Lily's loaded, maybe she'll fork over the money. We're not We're
not we're not doing that. Yeah, we're not doing that. Speaking of
a speaking of forking over the money, snart Tank dot shop, We've got
a merch operation open right now. It's early access for five dollars patrons over
at Patreon dot compslast a snart Tank you can get it. That store will
open on May seventeenth. Uh, it's doing pretty well. A lot of
people are big. There's big people are big fans of the Scumbag Hoodie in
particular. I should notice, brother, I should. Yeah, I knew
it. That's that's a big one. Gay Station three is a big one
too. So there's a lot of a lot of good ship over there.
There's some limited items there that will be gone when the store goes live for
everybody. And also because it's an early access period for patrons, there is
a there is a steep little discount there, so if you want to get
in before things get up to you know, normal prices. We're operating a
business here. You know, we got to come into our level. You
got to come into our you got to come into our hole. As the
kids say before you. I don't know what I was saying. Anyway,
there's merch over there. Go check that out. Uh what else? I
We're gonna focus a lot on questions because there's a lot of new patrons on
the five dollars tier, a lot of people asking questions now because of the
merch promotion, a lot of in like two days, there's like a ship
ton of questions. So we're gonna focus on questions today. But I do
want to mention. I do want to mention at the very least, there
is one thing that's happening in the news. There's a look, I don't
I don't know the politics of what's happening right now. I know there's like
a bunch of like protests happening on student campuses. I genuinely, and I
mean this sincerely, have no fucking clue what is going on because I've been
so offline I since I don't. I'm not even exaggerating when I say this.
I'm so disconnected from this that it's it's it's astounding, it really,
I've actually it's I'm flat, but it's probably it's probably the majority. It's
probably is the majority. Right, It's Look, man, the protests are
awesome, I'll just say that. And it is very cool seeing Palestinians acknowledge
the protests worth like signs and stuff and holding up a college, uh,
universities and stuff and science is kind of saying like we see you, like
thank you, and that's all I say about it. That's cool. But
other than that, like people are fucking busy, bro, I get it.
It's it's fucking yeah. I also I get it. The way I
feel about it, it's like it's it ain't going anywhere. As as fucked
up as that sound. I mean, they're going to the ground, you
know what I mean. You know what I mean? This conflict is is
how long? How old is this conflict? Like this it'll I'll catch it
is. But yeah, the reason I wanted to bring it up is because
there's been a big kind of conversation on Twitter, especially with like a lot
of streamer people weighing in. Obviously Hassan's weighing in. He's a political streamer.
Obviously, Destiny's weighing in, and and for some reason, asmen Gold
is weighing in also, and he's kind of like, yeah, he's he's
yeah, he's kind of like poking fun at the protesters, kind of like
doing all this stuff. And it's not surprising necessarily, but I and I
don't even again, I'm so detached from the situation that I don't even necessarily
I don't know what is going on. But I will say this. I
will say this, if I hypothetically agreed with everything asmen Gold was saying,
or his position on this issue, which I'm sure is very nuanced and very
deeply researched, Yeah, I feel like even if that were the case,
I would still be like, if I was in that audience and I like
had that perspective, I still feel like I would be like, hey,
can we can we get somebody who isn't caked in filth to say this?
Like I just I feel like genuine like from completely a politically speaking, I
feel like I would be a little embarrassed to have such a filthy person.
Did you see that picture going around of his room where like he's got bloodstains
on the wall, and apparently it was like like, oh yeah, he
replied to me, He's like, oh yeah, my gums would my gums
bleed every night and I would just wipe it on the wall instead of getting
up like yo, there's I just can't. I'm sorry, it's so bad.
That is so bad. It's an absolutely disgusting and I saw a picture
of him associating he was hanging out with other famous streamers or whatever. It
was like famous people, and all I could think was, I can't even
imagine how much that dude smells. Like there's no way that guy smells good.
Yeah, there's no way. He's like, oh man, like maybe
at best he smells like axe body spray. At best, he just he
doesn't shower, but he puts on after. He's like, good, I
smell good now, because if you don't, if you're at the point where
you don't brush your you're you're in. You're a first worlder that is rich.
And even before he was insanely wealthy, just doing well enough, you
can't afford I mean, a dentist in office. You don't even have to
visit the dentists and pay them. Just being in the office itself, there
will be toothbrush items, there will be toothcare available for you. There is
there is free shit, Like, there is zero excuse to not brush your
teeth. There's no it's not even absolutely no, it's not even It's not
even that that bothers me. It's the fact that like, dude, okay,
look, you got ginger vitis sucks, but like you're you wipe the
blood on your wall, dude, Like that is a next level that is
so fucking grimy. It's unbelievable. Like I really, like I couldn't believe
it when I saw that. I thought it was like AI or something.
I was like, there's no shot that he actually and that you would admit
to doing that, Like there's no shame. That's the thing. He doesn't
see anything wrong, Like the fact that there's even these pictures that exist.
If I like, say, my my office right now, there's there's some
shit on the floor right now, like nothing crazy, but there's a water
bottle, o feces, there's like there's a yeah, yeah, there's some
shit on the floor, but there's like my, my, my, goku
be me. There's a I took my socks off last night and they're still
there, so it's a little cluttered, but like it's but you would never
know because I would never show. It's not even that bad. But still
even though I got a pair of sweatpants back there on the floor that I
haven't picked up, WHOA what a tornado back there? Goddamn disaster. Yeah,
but like I would, I wouldn't would never show I am self aware
enough to where there's no way, there's no shot that I would ever show
how filthy I am. And when you see that these pictures are have been,
they were taken and shared without any problem or to admit to I wipe
my gum my bloody gums on on the wall, and it just it says
so much about a person. It says so much about a person that you're
like, Bro, do you remember he got some controversfore you when you said
wipe wipe his gums against the bloody why I physically imagined him pressing his gums
against the wall as they were bleeding against it and like scraping them against it.
Look, I'm not gonna pretend like I have amazing Like my teeth are
pretty are kind of fucked too, Like they've been stained by a lot of
like tea and coffee, and it kind of bothers me. Staining is is
unavoidable. If you eat food and drink stuff, you're gonna you're not gonna
avoid having stained teeth unless you're one of those people that go over the top.
Right, you go over the top, you get your teeth bleached.
You do all these extra things but it is natural to have stains on your
teeth. It's unavoidable. If you fucking eat, it's gonna happen. But
then there's your gums bleeding. That's actually different that you are not making Yeah,
that's you, not like it's simply just you, not mouthwash, not
gargling. It's really that. It's really that if you're not fucking using mouthwash
there it's a very easy chance that you can get ginger vitis because a lot
of people don't really brush their gums. But like the the mouthwash kind of
takes care of the you know, it prevents ginger vitis, so you get
Like anyway, we already know. He's absolutely disgusting and it is weird that
you would want to use this guy. I don't even know because he didn't
really say what was this position? He said he was making fun of the
protesters. Yeah he was. He let me, I can't remember exactly,
let me look it up. Uh real quick, here asmn Gold. By
the way, I've agreed with some of the stuff thatsmen Gold said before,
like as far as like gaming goes, but uh no, he has Yeah,
he has some reasonable takes outside of politics. In my it from what
I've seen, his takes outside of politics are reasonable, but when he's talking
about politics, it's pretty clear the type of people he watches. He put
it this way, he liked he he he liked to tweet by Ian Miles
Chong, which is kind of like a right, well they're that kind of
that says so much. He's, uh, yeah, it's it's you know,
it's it's something. It's something to consider that. It is something absolute
to consider that anyone don't. I can't really, I can't even say I
can trust anyone that would be like, oh yeah, this guy's ah,
I should get some news and information from this fucking guy. It's immediately I'm
like, oh, well, all right, Yeah that's how I feel.
I feel. I feel like that about a lot of people, though,
where yeah, I kind of yeah, outside of politics, there's a lot
of people that I'm like, yeah, like, uh, this band all
that remains. They just dropped a new single after like six years. You
know, their main guitar has died in a very sketchy way, and there's
been like a lot of shit going on, and then after all these years,
they finally dropped a single. And I was actually kind of browsing through
some forums and and and uh and whatnot and Reddit, just because I wanted
to get like a sense of what people thought about the lead singer, and
because he's like a liberally and he works. He's now a contributor on Tim
Poole's podcast, and so I just wanted to get a feel for what a
lot of people were saying. Yeah, and there's a lot of people that
obviously are trashing the shit out of him. But I've spoken with him.
I'm an acquaintance of his. He's actually featured on one of my videos and
so outside we're talking. Cool guy. But I don't want to talk to
him about politics ever, No, I don't want to do it. It's
it's always it's always disheartening whenever, like because if you look at my profile
anywhere, you're probably going to have a tough time predicting what you're going to
see, like the people that I'm going to retweet, or the or the
things that I like, like you're like on Twitter, like publicly, Like,
it's going to be really difficult for you to predict what that's going to
be. But whenever somebody disagrees with me on like something political, I always
go to their page, and I always I always know exactly what I'm going
to find. I always know exactly the accounts that I'm going to see retweeted,
I know exactly the accounts I'm going to see in their likes, and
it's all always right. It's always right. I'm never incorrect about it.
And it's like, God, damn, that's like NPC shit, Like literally,
like you are so route, you are so predictable in your routine that
I know exactly I know who you watch just by your blanket perspective on like
anything that I have to say. It's wild, and uh yeah, I
don't know how people function that way. I don't. Maybe they're all,
you know, maybe that's like an like a nightly reprogramming, like a nightly
like hard Reset, where everybody's you know, they go to bed, they
wipe their bloody gums on the wall, and then they wake up and they're
like, oh, you, Miles Strong has a lot of good points.
I like the way smart. I like you. I like what you try
to kill. I like how you try to kill a YouTuber. You try
to swat him and get him killed and then and then admit it to a
sex worker so like like, oh, I'm gonna I'm gonna gloat. I'm
gonna gloat to a fucking OnlyFans chick about like how I try to kill somebody.
That's a great give me think about that. Think about that as a
concept of thinking. That is a thing to be, like, hey,
what do you think of me? Now? Like you like that because they're
like, bro, who thinks murder I mean other than murderers or attempted murders?
That like, oh that yeah, that rules, bro, that fucking
rules. Dude, You're you're a really good guy. And the fact that
this guy sells a platform, I mean, I guess nothing really surprises me
anymore. Yeah, I am a little bit surprised about I'm a little bit
surprised about the risk how many people have because it's the cognitive dissonance. How
many of these people right now, like asthmen Gold understand legacy media mainstream used
to be called mainstream media, but now legacy media is less popular than like
say, independent media like a Tim Poole or something like they they will their
reach is more vast, like but they just have a less bigger production.
But like you see the biggest news on Facebook, the most like, and
the most traffic will come from like the Daily Wire or something for example,
right, which like, so, but the thing is so now it's been
classified as legacy media, but like, how many people know that legacy media
is bullshit? They will say, oh, yeah, you don't trust that
shit, like they're all just lying, it's all propaganda. But then at
the same time those motherfuckers will still consume pieces of it and be like,
I like what they're saying. So I'm just going I'm like, wha,
yeah, whoa. We'll hold on a second. It's always super hippocal.
Well, it's just annoying. It's kind of just it is just it's the
major it's not even the well, of course it's hypocritical, but it's like
the how do you hold these two thoughts? You know, Like the cognitive
dissonance is something that's so fascinating to me because I'm like, how do you
hold these two thoughts together? You understand this, but then you're still consuming
some of it. And the way that I am surprised how many people are,
like the way that they'll even classify the protesters. They'll call them like
pro Hama supporters, and I'm like, bro, Is that what you really
think? Do you think when people were against like the Iraq and Afghanistan like
ship that was going on, all the fucking mass deaths, over a million
dead motherfuckers, do you think they were pro al Qaeda? Like how fucking
stupid are you? Like? Come on, Yeah, it's a it's these
pro all kind of protests. Like it's like a very first grade it's a
very first grade understanding of like how the world works. But like whatever,
you know, people totally some people just don't. Some people just don't got
it. Uh but some people I don't know, don't. They just don't
got it. Man. But uh, I there's no I can't. I
can't get over the asthma gold dirtiness though, I can't get over Yeah,
I really that really that really is I think it's it's just it's really difficult
for me to respect somebody who who is filthy but doesn't have to be Like
I just I don't know what it is like and it's not I I assure
you, I really, I sincerely, I really do promise that this has
nothing to do with like, oh he has the like uh an opposing position
to mine potentially, Like I swear to you, Like, if I had
somebody in my camp who was saying the same thing, I'd be like,
there are better people to deliver this. There are there are There are better
people. You only the guy who like look, fondles roaches, wipes his
gum blood on the wall and fucking like smells like acts in a like a
fermented axe. Like we don't. Yeah, he was like, probably due
that's acts in a porta potty like access has been like sprayed and port that's
probably what he smells like. Bro, I want to do. I saw
something on Twitter a while ago and it was there's some girl I don't know
who the fuck this hick is. I think she's a streamer as well,
and she went on a rant about how filthy Asthma gold is and me,
I'm like, well, yeah, I get it, of course. And
then so x QC came out and defense was shitting on this girl, calling
her fat or something and like a drug un I don't know anything about her,
but it was bizarre seeing I'm like, why why is anybody? Why
would anybody defend this filth? And somebody really some EXQC, well ha on.
Somebody replied with exqc's room in some pictures he's had and he's not as
filthy as asthmen gold, but he's one of those people. So then I
understood that he actually, oh, he lives in squalor as well, and
he obviously takes that as a fence too, because he lives the same lifestyle
and he's like, well, he doesn't think anything's wrong with it. And
again another rich motherfucker beyond belief, wears all these rollies and shit, and
then apparently he's filthy as fuck too, and and look at it, and
I excuse is an absolute fucking mon But I will say I saw him one
time like mentally disabled, like there's no question, but I will say I
saw him one time really pushed back against Aiden Ross because Aiden Ross is like
the the excessor the successor of Andrew Tat or whatever is trying to be.
Yeah, he's he's like, he's like Andrew Tates cell junior. Right,
yeah, yeah, yeah, that's exactly what it is. And I saw
him pushing back because he was talking about the the like I think he was
basically advocating uh SQC, saying there isn't this gay agenda thing, like there
there is people just trying to live normally and comfortably and you are a bigot
and just having a problem with it and saying it's like some fucking epidemic or
whatever the fuck. And I was like, whoa, it was really weird
seeing excuc have like a really good, reasonable, normal take, really,
when everything else that I've seen him in has been just the dumbest fucking bullshit
ever. So I was like, at least his politics seem reasonable. That's
all I can say about excuse, you know, just to be like being
charitable, but he's still a filthy uft. I guess, I just I
know. It's it's really difficult for me, Like if dude, I'm sorry,
Like there's like if like if Bernie Sanders was on the campaign trail and
he was just caked and shit and you could see it on him, like
you can see it like dripping down his hair. So I was like,
there's no, I'm not voting for that guy, Like I'm sorry, Like
that might be like super shallow or whatever, or like like oh, well,
you're not really engaging with the substance. You're judging the person before what
they're saying. It's like, now there's a bunch of people are saying this
who aren't caked in filth, So like I'll just go to those people,
like it's there's there's many of people who you know what I mean, Like
I don't know, just have a higher standard for like who your optics are
important. You're right, optics are arguably like really the unfortunately, like the
only thing that do matter in like this modern era. So like you think
that you'd think that you'd be aware of it. Anyway, let's move on
to some questions from from our people. There's really not anything going on.
There is a whole thing going on in the rap game with Kendrick Lamar and
Drake and j Cole. I want to get killed in on that conversation specifically.
Yeah, so yeah, well we'll hold that off because I'm sure more
stuff will happen by then. But uh, let's see that night man.
Yeah, he's dead. By the way. On our merch store, did
you see the did you see the about section? I wrote I wrote like
a little I wrote, No, I didn't. I wrote a whole spiel
about our origins, our origin stories on our shop. I'm sure there's extremely
accurate. Absolutely, it's all. It's all incredible it's all. It's all
very incredibly accurate. Uh go check that out if you if you have access
to that store. By the way, I had fun writing that. The
Nightman wrote in he says, what is up, my goofy goobers, who's
the strongest fictional character you think you could beat in a fist fight? I'd
say for me, it would be close, but I could probably beat Kayu's
dad. I like this, Yeah, Cayu's father, somebody who's like someone
who's strong, and I could beat them probably, well, the strongest character
in fiction that you could defeat. Basically, it's a good question, Like
it's an interesting question, but I guess the strongest almost feels redundant because it's
like who who? Who do I think I can beat? Just like who?
Right? But the strong like the strongest? Ah, that's so subjective.
Uh, I don't know. I that's that is something that that's a
that's a that that definitely gets the nog and jogging, because I feel like
so many people in fiction are just there there, there's almost no in between.
They're either incredibly because they're just normal people are incredibly strong, right,
because like even like krillin for example, who's one of the weakest out of
the bunch. He would absolutely decimate us. You know. Yeah, It's
one of those things where I'm like, huh, yeah, I think maybe
I don't know man, Like I don't think I could beat Like, I
don't think I could beat mister Satan, you know what I mean. No,
Like, I don't like and and mister Satan is the joke in that
world. So like dragon Ball is off the table, I think like maybe
Yaji Robi maybe, like I think that's I think that's a chance because he's
the guy like Ralph build. Yeah, if he doesn't have a if he
doesn't have a sword. I think maybe I could defeat Yager Roby. I
think I do. Okay, I'll put it. I think I could beat
Sailor Moon. I think I could, Like if I just cut because I
think nobody, nobody interrupts her in the middle of the transfer the transformation sequence,
and I would I just wouldn't let her do it. I would say,
I would not She's a fourteen year old girl. She's a fourteen year
old girl. I would I would, I would would kill her like it
would easily, like it would be there would be no shot. But she's
also very she's strong. Theoretically, You're right, I think I could beat
most of the Sailor Scouts and a tuxedo mask I think, yeah, so
he tuxedo Mask does nothing. He just throws like roses or some shit.
He shows us at the end of He shows up at the end of every
conflict. I don't know if I'm remembering this correctly. I haven't watched Sailor
Moon in like since the nineties. Probably, I think maybe maybe like two
thousand and two was probably like the last time. Even that's being like generously
uh, you know, recent, It was the last time I saw an
episode of Sailor Moon. But I feel like I remember the structure of that
show being Sailor Moon's in trouble, she'd becomes Sailor Moon. She defeats the
thing, and then tuxedo masks come like comes down. It almost does like
a Hercule, where like he kind of takes credit for it in some way,
and then Sailor Moon is like swooning over it because it's like, oh
my god, he beat the beat the person, and then he runs away
all mysterious. The swooning, I don't that is actually funny. The funny
thing is I actually don't have any recollection of him doing anything either, and
maybe that is the joke. It's been too long, so I don't actually
remember the nuance at all, but you're probably right. I do remember there
being a scene, and I don't know if if somebody either put it,
if this was actually the actual dialogue, if somebody wrote it in themselves where
it was something like he shows up and it was like you didn't do anything,
and then he just takes this cape and then fucks off like kind of
a thing. I don't know if that was real or if that was representation
of how it normally goes. But I remember loving Tuxedo Mask, and there
was a brief moment where I was going to start a music project called Tuxedo
Mask, but the SEO was completely fucked because like if yeah, everything would
just immediately go to him and nobody would find my project. And I was
like, that's a good idea, but I tried, but yeah that yeah,
yeah, yeah, I think we can beat up the Sailor Moon Crew.
Maybe not the the the Queen Barrel. I don't I don't know if
they all had different names, because I know I know her name was different
in in English versus the dub versus the original, So I don't know if
they all had different names, but Queen Beryl is the main boss. Well
watching the Dub one and her opinions I think were pretty I don't think I
could beat them. They seem like that a lot of No, I don't
think. I know those are like those are straight up demons, I think,
But I think I could beat I think I think I could beat the
Sailor Scuts, provided I get in there before they transform. And even then
I think I might have a shot. Right, maybe the totally Spies I
would wipe the floor with. I think sure. I think the entire Scooby
Do Gang, with the exception of Fred, probably I think I could take
Fred. Yeah, Fred, I don't it seems jacked in a way that's
like really subtle, like almost like a muscle man, like not like a
not like a like a bodybuilder, but like a like a like a strong
man from like the thirties, you know what I mean, where like he's
got a lot of muscle, but none of it's defined or toned. He
just kind of looks like a just kind of looks like a like a like
like bubble Buddy almost. I feel like he's got that kind of build.
So I think Fred would probably kill me. But I think I could take
Shaggy. I think I could take uh. I mean, Velmont and Daphne
are easy marks. Yeah, Scooby might be a problem, but I think
he's so much a coward be a major problem. That's a massive dog,
but he is a coward away. Yeah, it's Shaggy too, right,
You just pass him a bunt and then you just snap his neck. That's
Shaggy. I bet I promise you that Shaggy has malnutrition, So I think
I think I could twist his I think I could just break his bones like
toothpicks he has he has, he has a tapeworm and he has eatrosis.
So I think I think I could. I think I could just if I
did one pushed down a good flight of stairs and Shaggy's it sounds like you
know those videos where they like roll vases down the stairs on TikTok, or
like they roll like glass bottles down the stairs and wait for them the shatter.
That's that's Shaggy falling down the stairs like you are going to hear breaking
ceramic and glass at every bounce because he's so frail, like I've got no
medical coverage. Yikes. And then fucking cook Scooby we uh we fucking yeah.
And then Fred, Fred, you just get a shotgun. I guess
that you just deal with him with a shotgun, because as strong as he
is, he just blow him away, unless like if I had, if
I had a gun, or like an enchant scepter, I think I could
take Fred Chad sceptor. Yeah, there's those are the only those, the
only two. Those are the only two instances I'm coming out on adience,
Fred, why was that your first thought? An enchanted scept What were you
watching? I really, I don't know. I tried to think of something
else as deadly as a gun, and I couldn't think of it, and
it immediately went to enchanted scepter. I don't know, Okay, but yeah,
I think yeah that counts. I think, yeah, I could take
any fictional kids patch hatch At. I don't know, man, I think
I feel like he has he has too many tricks up his sleeves. You'd
probably he'd probably inject you with the something lethal, like if you got too
close. Yeah, make sure I'm gonna kill you where you kill me?
Hey, look at me. He's got his clown nose on, and he's
got like a big but he's got a non Euclidean bag of tricks, and
he's just like he's pulling out like it's it's just an infinite bag where he's
just pulling out like hammers that are like five times the size of it.
Come over here. I haven't seen Patch Adams in a very very long time.
I don't think that's what the movie is, but I'm pretty sure it's
a movie about a guy in the hospital trying to make people smile by putting
on a cloud nose. I don't think there's any like Jim Carrey's the Mask
type fuckery going on in Patch Adams. But nevertheless, yeah, it's a
it's a good question. I kind of I feel like this could be its
own extra and I would love to get Kingston's input on this, so I
think we might recycle. This might be you know what I'm gonna I'm gonna
put a note here recycle for extra Ammo, because I think that'd be a
good one to come back to with everybody we use after we get some time
to think about it. You know, because I think that's a fun one.
I misspelled recycled. Oh well what, Yeah, I don't know.
I think I typed it. It's it's really you know, like I wrote
restyle, I wrote recyle by accident. That works. It works. Yeah,
whatever, Okay, distraught DM road and he says, hello, Hello,
longtime listener, first time homeless person. Welcome aboard, Welcome to the
homeless. We're gonna have a We're gonna have an army of homeless, the
likes of which not even Rome could withstand. I think, iding easily.
Oh dude, San Francisco is already like they're already on their way. All
right. Yeah, but he writes in, My question is if you could
put six problematic celebrities or media pundits in a death battle, who would it
be? Six problematic celebrities? Man, Okay, that's interesting. I think.
Look, it's a lot of it's a lot of people. I think
we can battles. Like are we talking about are we talking about like say,
the running series death battle? Are you just talking about like that's more
of a one on one thing. Yeah, I think I don't know.
Let's try to get six. We'll try to try to get six problematic celebrity.
Problematic celebrities, that's all. Well, damn uh A lot of them
are dead. Yeah, yeah, dancy, Yeah, just get these fat
ugly fucking yeah, Dan Snyder, that's a good one. Uh, Bill
Cosby, Maybe Bill Cosby would be good. I want Kevin Spacey, Oh
yeah, him as as Frank Underwood, though he has to be Frank Underwood.
I say, I say, this is gonna be a mighty fine death
battle. Yeah, He's gonna be a mighty battle to the death. I
think what I'll do is I'll buy Bill Cosby's throat out and spit it into
Dan Schneider's eyes. Yeah, that's what I'll do. I do declare I've
never seen that show. I mean it you it's you pretty much nailed it.
That's pretty much. Yeah. Leghorn, Yeah, he's like a foghorn.
Leghorn on ambient is what. It's kind of the vibe I get from
Frank Underwood where he's just he's just like I say, I say, I
say, I say, I will sell our country to the to the Rooskies
for five dollars. Yeah. That so fucking crazy. If somebody had the
like, just the authority to sell America and they settled for five dollars.
They're like, listen, give me a give me a solid fiber, and
this all this is yours. Yeah, I'm trying to get one of those
five dollars foot longs from subway. Yeah, he just gets a subway and
after he eats his sandwiches, like, hmm, what have I done?
This might have been what we call him the South, a fucking disastrous mistake.
I love, I love I really love the idea. Frank, it
would selling the selling America for a really like medial price. I love that
so deeply. Oh god, he goes to subway. He goes to subway
and he still has like it's not even like it's seven dollars for the five
dollars foot long with tax, so he can't even Oh fuck, when did
this happen? Where am I supposed to go to get this five dollar foot
long? I'm sorry, sir, that was fucking ten years ago. Well,
he's got almost he's got almost like a Mitch. He's got like almost
a Mitch Headberg kind of like quality to him in some in some way,
like like not exactly, but there's like like I could see I could see
Frank Underwood doing Mitch Hedburg style jokes where it's like, yeah, somebody,
uh, somebody in the audience called me a has been, which is strange
because I never I don't remember becoming an is B or something stupid that actually
that actually does track. Yeah, I can't take credit for that. I
definitely heard that somewhere. Uh okay, so this is my away. We
got three Oh yeah, that's right. Oh wait, okay, oh wait,
wait all right, so we got Harvey Weinstein, Bill Cosby, Dan
Schneider, Kevin Spacey. So we need two more problematic celebrities. I say,
throw oh man, wasn't there somebody there was somebody recent? Oh fuck
ah, I'm not gonna remember it. It was such an obscure thing.
But we could throw uh, I don't know, fucking throw him. Throw
An Shapiro in there. Why not? Yeah, I guess he is considered
a celebrity. So he's a problematic celebrity. He's in those Daily Wire movies
as a great Ben Shapiro. Yeah, I would like to put in Joseph
Rogane because oh, Joe Rogan Yeah, I think Joe rogan is. I
mean, at this point, I think he's probably the king of problematic celebrities
now because he just I was listening to a podcast and I totally agreed with
him. They're like, dude, this guy's so rich, he doesn't have
there's he has no reason he does not have to bring on top Er Carlson
on his fucking show. You get like, talk to anybody. That was
funny. That was funny as fun though, listening to Tucker Carlson deny evolution
in front of everybody that I couldn't believe that. I was like, this
is crazy, but it's funny to me. But I know that there are
tens of millions of people that are like, yeah, this guy's a fucking
genius. This guy really knows, this guy really yeah proved. Here's the
thing about this. Here's the thing about this death battle though, right,
that's the last one. So it's Ben Shapiro, Joe Rogan, Kevin Spacey,
Uh Harvey wins seen himillk Schneider, Oh, Dan Sneider, Joe Rogan's
winning. That sounded like, but I think Dan Snyder could eat Joe Rogan.
Oh wait, he's smaller. Now, fuck fuck, I'm not gonna
actually I'm thinking of Dan Snyder in his prime. Yeah, well and do
you dance? Site has always been big No, but he's like much smaller
now. Oh yeah, he's he's lost weight. Yeah I did see that
video that that apology video or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The
excuses that he's got to exploited, yeah one of them. Look, Dan
Schneider, I'm so confused by him because actually he's in the news too because
he's he's actually suing that the producers of that of that uh uh, not
the Netflix documentary, the HBO Max show Quiet on Set. He's suing them
for like defamation and ship and that. To me, I'm so I don't
know what to make of this guy. Like actually, like because part of
me looks at this guy and I was like, dude, he's so clearly
guilty, But then like why, But then I'm thinking about it, and
I'm like, he Okay, so he's he's definitely a bad boss. He's
definitely a creep, But like, why the here's my logic, right,
why would you sue under Why would you sue that company knowing full well that
if you are guilty of any of this that they're going to find it in
discovery? Why would you do that? I almost feel like he just wants
to hurt them a little bit financially and they'll just settle outside of court.
Yeah, yes, I feel like maybe. Yeah, it's just so weird
to me. I just don't I don't understand because even in the even with
it sounds like a terrible idea. Yeah, but even in that documentary,
like Dan Scheider comes across like a real asshole for sure, but like he's
also surrounded by genuine like like he's kind of thrown in there with like serial
rapists and like actual pedophiles, to the point where it's like, it's weird
to me that if there was any indication that he was one of those people
or he is that kind of person, that that wouldn't have come up in
the documentary. So I don't know what. I really don't know what to
make of Dan Sneider at all, Like he's either like a sadistic, evil
son of a bitch or the most unlucky person in the fucking world, because
I don't I don't know why he would be. I don't know why you
would, sue, Uh. I don't know what. I just it's all
I can't get in the mind, the headspace of it. It's so bad,
I think it. I think, well, I would just say he's
an egomaniac, which a lot of people are that get at that level,
and some of the stuff that they're saying about him in the documentary would probably
confirm that. And again, I think just wanting to hurt them, not
actually go through with a defamation lawsuit, just settle out of court. I
think that's what he's just trying to financially hurt them. I imagine he doesn't
actually want to go through with the with an actual lawsuit, which is what
I imagine. What still, even with that, it's just putting him more
in the limelight, which is stupid when you when you're when you're like,
when you're in his position, you want to just not say anything you want
to, just because mainly the documentary is he didn't actually do anything illegal,
so as far as like the documentary was talking about, so if anything,
it's like you kind of don't need to You can just kind of fade into
obscurity. People will forget about you after a while and then that's it.
And but I think egomaniacs can't let that happen. They're like, oh no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
you're it's it's stupid. But I think a lot of times they sabotage themselves
like that all the time. Like shit, I was just watching the video
on Hulk Hogan where he lied. He inserts himself into everything he lies about
some of the most obvious. He said that Andre did Giant, you know,
one of the biggest fucking wrestlers of all time, died two days after
he wrestled him at WrestleMania three. But he lived for like years after that,
like six more years or something. And it's like, what, what
the fuck is wrong with you? Like why do you have to make everything
about you? Like it's he just can't help himself, and he's still to
this day does it. Even recently was like, oh, I discovered the
Undertaker. He was like one of the extras in one of his movie,
Suburban Commando, and he's like, yeah, I remember blah blah blah,
and I gave him the name, and I was like, dude, he
was already signed to the WWF when that fucking movie is being feel like he
just can't not do it. And I feel like maybe Dan Snyder has somewhat
of that, Like I have to and I'm like, dude, just go
away. Stop, You've done enough. Even his legacy, I think his
legacy of the shows that he created, what Eclipse, the creepiness that he
did in time, like of course, like if you have her in a
discussion with Dan Snyder about Dan Snyder gonna be like, what a fucking creepy
ass weirdo. But mostly people are just gonna be like, oh, Drake
and Joss was dope, I Carly was dope. Whatever the fuck else he
was, you know, all the other shows that he was involved in.
It's he has it. Yeah, yeah, I don't know, man,
think I think Brian Singer is a great example. Brian Singer did like gay
orgies with like teenagers and shit. Why it was like filming X Men or
whatever. Like he did some crazy shit and no one talks about that at
all, Like it just it is crazy. He doesn't say anything. He
just like fucking is like, I'm out of here, bro, I don't
know weird. Yeah, I know, it's it's very strange. Anyway,
let's move on. We've got some other questions. Here, where's the water?
Wrote in he says, what's up? Charcoal? Onyx and Spick I've
recently started trade school, and my teacher was telling me about the potential injuries
on the job, such as losing my fingers or metal rods impaling me,
and what point did I majorly fuck up? Bonus questioned, what was the
most dangerous situation your job has put you through? So I the the first
question. We can't really answer that, like, that's that's up to you.
I don't know's at what point you fucked up? If that drop probably
pays pretty well, so i'd imagine you probably are in a pretty good position,
but just be careful, Just be careful. But the bonus question,
to me is a little more interesting. So I'm going to focus on your
bonus question, what was the most dangerous situation in your job has put you
through? I think because like so, I haven't worked any like factory jobs
or anything like that. I've done retail almost exclusively, and then I've done
this for oh my god, almost ten years now, which is fucking weird.
But so this is not a dangerous job, and retail isn't really dangerous
job either. But I do remember specifically being put I remember a black Friday
shift specifically where I would come in and I came in. Every day that
I would work, I would come in at six am and I would leave.
I would either have a part time shift where I would leave around like
noon, or I would I would leave at like four or something, and
that would be generally the shift. And we had a black Friday shift.
I can't remember if it was the I think it was Thanksgiving morning, where
I went in at six am. On Thanksgiving, I came back at I
think two. I went to Thanksgiving dinner at my girlfriend's house at the time.
This is like twenty twelve or you know, twenty yeah, twenty twelve,
And after dinner, I went back to work from I believe seven or
eight to four am, and then I had to be back the next day
at six am, and I worked till noon, and then I went back
from like from three to close. And it was a fucked scale, like
there was like no sleep whatsoever. And I remember driving home on my final
like the last shift of that of that entire sequence of events, and falling
asleep on the road and like just while I was driving and like like like
the shaking of the car like woke me up. I was like, oh,
was like at that point, I was like Yo, I'm quitting soon
because no shot am I going to die for seers. That that shit was
ridiculous. That schedule was so fucking insane. I don't even think I went
home. I think I slept in the car. I think I just slept
went to the parking lot and slept in the car, like overnight. Yeah,
from from three am to from three am to six It's fucking ridiculous.
Yeah, that type of shit, as far as I'm concerned, it's it's
supposed to be illegal, but I think it was supposed to be. Like
I forgot, there's a minimum of hours they can go back to work,
but obviously people abuse it all the time. Yeah. I used to work
for the government. Like there was these city projects that they would do to
install like water meters and electric meters, and I was. I was working
in Glendale and the new meters were being attached to these fiberglass lids. They
were being replaced with the old concrete lids, and uh, we didn't have
good I was. I was in charge of the warehouse essentially while the other
technicians and stuff were installing shit. And in my downtime, I had to
screw those meters. The water ones onto the lids, and I was telling
my boss like, hey man, I shouldn't be breathing this shit in like
like I just had these little shit masks, and I'm like, bro,
this is this is fiberglass, Like this is obviously this is gonna give me
cancer if I do this for you know, an extended amount of time.
And he was kind of like he's from the South. He looks like he's
fucking He already looks like he's he's like an old goat. He looks like
just he looks like a plucked chicken because he's just like one of those like
he's fifty years old, but he's just been working hard his entire life,
so he already looks like he's dead. And he's just like, ah,
like stop being a lot to post like he's he's one of those people where
he's like a little little little like he'd be one of those people like a
little as festis isn't gonna kill you, Like he's one of those type of
people. And I was like, bro, this is crazy that you're so
just why are you pushing back against this at all? Just invest a little
bit of money to get like good fucking mask you know that, like with
the whatever, and I had a bitch about that for quite some time before
he actually just did it, and then he only bought one, which I'm
like, all right, so then basically I'm supposed to just wipe this down
and then somebody else uses it after if I'm not doing like it was just
it was fucking weird, man. I was like, dude, why don't
and you hear about these stories of construction people, you know, getting all
fucked up decades later, Yeah, because they were doing similar shit, and
uh yeah, so that I'm I'm fine, but I do remember I did
have some pretty bad lung issues that year, and I will say I thought
it was funny. I learned about this was in twenty ten, and I
learned about Kim Trails in twenty ten, the conspiracy of Kim Trails, and
my chest was like hurting a lot at one point, and I was just
like, oh, maybe it's the Kim Trails instead of thinking, oh,
no, maybe it's the fucking fiberglass. I've been brick brig chest. Yeah,
dude, so fiberglass is no joke. Fiberglass is fucking crazy, and
you know, construction constructions so fucking like I had an uncle who like he
fell like they were like making bricks, like big concrete bricks, and he
fell into one of them, and then he just had to live the rest
of his life in that brick. His lips, I think his his lips
were outside of it, so it was like it was like if you were
looking at it from the side, it would be like it would be like
one side would be just a flat brick and the other side would be a
brick, but then you'd see his lips and like a little bit of his
nose popping out so you could breathe and eat. But that's pretty yeah,
he did. He becomes pretty fucked up superhero like Brickman or anything. He
no, he he died eventually, like really he died, I think like
three weeks later because he kept they couldn't get him out of it without killing
him. But then like he shot so much and he like he had to
go to the bathroom, so he shot so much in the brick, and
there's like there's no there's no other space. So he just filled himself up
with ship and died. Oh yeah, that's that's that's a really horrible,
really gruesome story. Man rest in peace. It's rest in peace? Yeah
real, sorry, yeah, yeah, he I mean, we didn't really
like him that much. It wasn't that big of a deal. It was
kind of a yeah, it was kind of a blessing in disguise. He
was a mooch sort of. We buried him in the brick you buried him
in. We figured it's enough of a coffin. You know, is he
holding up any foundation right now? Is he? Is he even? Is
he like his circle of live thing, he's like helping out. No,
we didn't even want to give him that. I think we just we were
kind of glad to get rid of him anyway. Fair enough, Thank you
for writing in, Thank you for writing in. Where's the water? Spank
Sinatra Road? And he says, uh span Sinatra and Bing comesby road he
says, howdy guys. One of the latest episodes. On one of the
latest episodes, you guys talked about the pop Tart movie. So I was
wondering if you could turn any of your bits from the show into a movie,
which one would it be, who would star in it? Better yet,
who would direct it? Would it be connected to the Snark Tank cinematic
universe? Stay snarky. So I just want to bring this up because we
have an entire sub series dedicated to this in some way where we write our
own versions of movies, but this is more specific. I guess it's what
bits would we turn into? Oh, go ahead easily, oh man,
uh a, since Sony wants to make these fucking dumbass Madam Webb and Morebius
and Craven and all this shit. Uh, we're making a Pizza Time movie
and we're bringing back Sam Raimi right now. And I don't know if Sam
Raimi has any type of contract with fucking Disney right now and stuff, because
he did the second what's that alien's name Cumberbatch movie that's yeah, yeah,
that's it, and so he did. Uh. I don't know if there's
yeah totally you know, I don't know if yeah, if he but we'll
work it out. I want Sam Raimi back. I want Willem Dafoe obviously
reprising well not I guess taking. I guess he's technically not reprising his role
because it's but he accepts. I feel like if you catch him walking down
New York, you know, people always like they'll they'll catch him walking down
New York somewhere like those him like doing his outfit and asking him, like
what he's wearing all that shit, Like just approach him and just hand him
the script. He might be like, yeah, I'm gonna take a look
at this, and I think he probably would end up calling. You'd be
like, I'm in now. I I was. I was. I was
walking down the street and this man approached me with this script and I thought,
wow, that's amazing. Pizza Time love, I was. I love
the idea of someone approaching Willem Dafoe with this script on the street and him
being instantly enamored. Was this Pizza Time cover of it? Just the cover
just and it's like it's it's Times due Roman. It says Pizza Time real
small, but then like underneath it it's clip art. It's like Windows ninety
eight, Windows XP clip art pizza underneath it. And he goes, wow,
this is uh, this is exciting. I must say, I'm captivated,
absolutely captivated by this, dude. I want that. Yeah, yeah,
yeah, I think it's a good idea. Yeah, there's a lot
of legs in that as far as like any other bit, like, I
don't know, that's that's really is the first one that came to mind really
was pizza Time, just because it is so stupid and so like, I
feel like it you could approach that from any angle and get something hilarious out
of it. But I'm sure there's I I really do not remember what the
fuck we talk about on this show immediately after we recorded. It's the same
thing with Sacred where like I just don't remember. So there's probably like a
million great it's probably at least one hundred great bits that I think could work
in that in that capacity that we just completely just completely gone totally. You
know what happened. I was at a gym yesterday and I I so normally
when I go in the sauna, I put on a playlist or something so
I don't have to I leave my phone outside of the sauna. I don't
like to bring it in. I know you can bring it in it it
especially if you keep it close to your body. It'll just absorb some of
the heat so it won't overheat. But I still just like to keep it
outside, so you just just put on music, let's it play. But
this time I was letting a podcast and I had ten minutes left in a
podcast and I ended up staying a song no longer than ten minutes, and
I was like, fuck, this is awkward. I don't want to leave,
but now it's silent. And so what I did was I pushed next
and it actually played snark Tank. It went to it like went to almost
like an auto thing, and it went to start, and I was like,
oh that's fucking. I'm like, oh great. I was immediately.
I was like, oh, great, fucking But it was actually a pleasant
surprise because I really don't after the editing's done, I don't want to hear
that shit ever again. But right how I heard the yeah right, and
I heard the Fred Flintstone shitting bit, like I listened to it and I
was actually laughing. I was like, in the sun, I'll laughing.
I was like, dude, this is really funny. I was actually really
like, this is awkward that I'm listening to ourselves back. But I forgot
how funny that fucking bit was. I I really enjoyed it. I do
it. I do it sometimes where like I'll go back to uh, I'll
just every down and then I'll get like an urge to see, like I
wonder what we talked about. So I'll go back like several dozen episodes and
I'll just like kind of click through it and skim through it to see I'll
usually look for our faces, like if we're all like smiling, or if
we're like moving a lot, because it's like, oh, something happened,
and it's usually like it. It's usually genuinely entertaining to me. Like I'll
watch it and be like this was, this was this is a fucking ridiculous
conversation. I love it, but I know what you I know what you
mean. It's like it's kind of awkward because it's like, oh, you're
listening to yourself. That's so fucking what. Are you a narcissist? And
it's like, no, I genuinely forgot it. Yeah, it is a
little feels pretentious. I will say I have twice. It was cool.
Somebody mentioned that they went back and listened to Independent Stay two because I've listened
to it twice. I've I have literally listened to that entire episode two times
because I wanted a refresher on all of the insanity that was in it.
And it was the second time it was it was just as good because I
kind of forgot and then I was like, oh yeah, like the and
I still it's probably out of all the ones that we've done so far,
that one's still my favorite because it was it was easily the stupidest it was.
It was the the mask one was pretty fucking stupid too, obviously,
but that the Uncle the Uncle Phil thing. I can't get over it.
It's it's too it's too stupid. Still every time I think about it makes
me laugh. It is so profoundly it is so profoundly dumb in a way
that you cannot explain. But yeah, no, that's it. Yeah,
I don't know, like I really like especially sometimes usually what I'll do is
I'll go back really far, Like I'll go back to like episodes in like
like even before one hundred, just to see, like, because there's no
shot I remember any of like the minute things in this episode, and I'll
listen to it at two time speed because listen, I'm not trying to you
know, I'm not trying to spend more time necessary listening to my own voice.
But there are some bits in there that I'm like, oh my god,
that was so funn especially like early COVID. The early COVID bits were
like really good before we understood, like what the hell was happening. There's
some there's some good stuff in there. In my mind, I say,
it's like, oh, we actually have a good show here. Sometimes it's
sometimes it feels like the opposite because it's just talking. It's just the same
thing that we do all the time. But it is there's there's some gold
in there. I think you're right, but I think pzza time. I
sometimes yeah times ship Yeah, no, go ahead, No, you're you're
right about that. No, you're right. I just I do. I
do believe. I do believe that we have the show is good. I
do lose sight of that. That is definitely true. Sometimes I almost feel
like the fuck are we doing in a way, But it's also it's also
me. I think sometimes it's just being a little bit hard on ourselves in
a way, like sometimes I feel like there's a certain standard and sometimes I
feel like I don't know if we reach that standard. But at the same
time, I'm not the listener. I'm the so really, if if I
see people complaining me like this shit sucks, like when they complained about the
titty rating episode, which was like I think unanimously, I mean, what
a disaster of a fucking episode, and all right, that's what I want
to like When people get us feedback like that, I'm like, Okay,
no fair, that was a shit episode. I totally agree, the worst
one, easily the worst one we've ever done. But I think by like
orders of magnitude because even the ones that aren't like because I think our last
the lastisode we did wasn't particularly like we didn't go off like hard in the
pan on like like crazy hilarious like diatribes, right, but like I feel
like it was at the very least like interesting. But like that one was
just like a mess, like that one that was fucking so bad. But
I think, well, here's the thing too about about this is that I
do think this is why I think it's important. I think being in person
just there's something about that energy being able to improvise with people on the spot
in person with no delay. You feel the energy in the room. It
just it. Because I was listening to those earlier episodes and you there is
a point where it's like you can't really tell necessarily. I really heavily edited
those episodes though, like I would like move things around a lot. Yeah,
but like you could just tell that there's like, oh, everybody's like
kind of like in the you can feel the energy of the room, which
I think is important in making jokes. I think you need to be able
to feel the energy in the and when you're separated by like you know,
the Internet and like it's a screen, it's a little bit more difficult to
do it. So I'm I'm just crazy. Yeah, delay really fucks everything
quite frankly, like it's and it's and and it and it all has to
do too with like there's all sorts of different things to factor and it's like
I think, I genuinely think sometimes that Sweeney's like volume, like his like
his volume for us is low, and he can't tell when we're talking sometimes
you know what I mean. It's like in person, I do there,
I can interrupt him, and I think it'll it'll it would flow like we
can interrupt each other in person in a way that's a lot more natural and
organic than we can hear. I will say, the biggest thing I am
ecited for is Sweeny me being able to or us to just fix everything that
that that that as as editors, as both of editing his podcast, that
like deal with his audio and certain things. Is it makes I was.
I randomly just had a fleeting thought where because you know he has the he
has the little stand on his desk, and like, why why do you
not have one of these? And he talked about getting a shitty one or
something that like fucked up, and all I thought about. I literally just
had a fleeting thought the other day, and I'm like, why did you
just buy a different one? Like why did you give up? Like why
did you like think the things that? Like? So, because when we're
in person, we'll have the proper shit, the the the audio, like
when we're doing our checks, like we're checking the balance. Because when he
got his new cloud lifter, I was like, fuck y as audio is
it is thick, it is good, And then somehow it went back to
being like the tiny with it. I'm like, what what happened? What
the fuck? Lady? Like, I'm just excited to be able to let's
just do our sound checks, Let's get everything good. We're in a nice
padded room to where there isn't just like his barren room that sounds like it's
fucking in a goddamn cave. Like I'm excited for the quality to really be
brought up and then us to bantern person like, I'm really excited for that
for sure. Yeah yeah, I was like, and I don't mean to.
I know it's probably annoying to hear. It's like constantly hyping this up.
I'm just genuinely excited about about doing I am a yeah. My my
my wife is she has one more week of work and then she's gonna fuck
off to her home country for a while. I'm gonna go. I'll talk
to you more about it, Chris, because I basically in a couple of
weeks, I don't know which day, but in a couple of weeks,
I'm gonna come back up to California, and the purpose is to secure an
apartment and try to be out of here by the first June, so you
know, hopefully it all works out. The problem is I'll look at Oh,
here's the new listing available, already seven applications put in, and I'm
like, oh, well, yeah cool. I'm like it's not all right.
Well I'll see what's available when I'm up there. I guess, yeah,
all right, let's see, let's see what the fuck So many of
these are? All right, I'm gonna read this one Tank Guard Triple Threat,
last Man's Standing Match featuring the Benua family wrote and he says, someone
is holding a gun to everyone of your family members' heads, and the only
way to get them to put it down is to suck dick until completion and
swallow. You're allowed to pick who the dick is attached to. Who you
picking must be male. You say it must be You say it must be
male. Uh so I'm gonna lawyer this easily. So yeah, trans women
are biologically male, so great, so I will pick this is a really
hot trans Yeah, come on? Uh, who's that really famous one that
they said Drake? Uh? They said that Drake fucked her. I don't
see, I don't know anything about the the Uh well, I can just
look it up real quick. If I put in trans drake. I'm sure
somebody here knows what I'm talking about. But there's this influencer that well,
actually it was the thing I don't know. See, Okay, I will
so the sake of argument, I'm want to say this that she still has
her penis because I don't know if she did the you know, she cut
her you know, she cut her her junk off the full transition what do
they call it? Bottom surgery? Yeah? Yeah, but yeah, so
so I'm not happy about the swallowing thing, obviously, that's uh, I
yeah, the problem is with that is the problem with that. To be
honest, I think I would probably vomit everywhere, but I think the attempt
would have to count because there's nothing I can do. But like, even
think about that upsets Yeah. Yeah. The thing about it is the thing.
The thing about it to me is like, would I would I be
happy sacrificing every single member of my family for the pride of knowing that I
wasn't gay? And the answer is no, I'd probably just I'd probably just
suck you know what I mean, Like, I'd probably suck it up and
just all right, fine, let's figure this out. I know there are
definitely some Look, man, I've definitely been around at least two trans women
in my life that have had me a little bit. I'd be like,
you know, this is stronger than not zero, you know, like more
more so than I ever thought. Like, uh, I'm like at least
five percent considering this. There's a lot of beautiful trans fasten there, and
uh, you wouldn't you wouldn't know. You wouldn't know, like say,
if they didn't fully transition, just you wouldn't know unless like oh, you
were invited back to the room. And then it's like some you know what
I'm saying, Like outside exterior, you would have no fucking idea. So
that's what I'm like lawyering in this situation, you would to lessen the blow
because I'm not there. There's no shot, Like with no joke jokes aside,
there's no shot. I could just blow some dude with abs and he's
all like to you know, like a like I've made jokes about like oh,
Henry cavill is so gorgeous. I but like, no shot, dude,
I'm not I'm not gonna fuck Henry cavi but like like but in a
situation like this, it's like a life or death thing for my family.
Okay, well we're getting You said it has to be male and I'm like,
all right, well you didn't say okay, so he didn't say it
has to be male passing, So I'm like, you just say, ok
here's the thing. Here's the thing about this. Let's say you do this
right and you save your entire family and then your family gives you shit for
it for the rest of your life. Well then I'm shooting my family myself.
But then but then you'd say that, but then you've swallowed come and
you have no family, So then it's like a lose, you lose basically,
you know what I mean, Like it's a it's a complete line.
Well, I think I think if you're a good person, you're saving your
family's life outweighs the gratitude I guess you should receive from them. It's almost
like when people kind of expect a gift back when you gift somebody something that
it's like, well, then you're not really gifting someone, you're ex're you
want an exchange, that's what you want. Or it's like a gift is
supposed to be something that is free, Like a gift is here, you
go, I'm just giving this to you because I preciate you, and if
you're expecting something back, it is nice to get something back. But if
you're expecting something back, well then it's not really a gift. You can
call it a gift exchange, which is different. Yeah, because then there's
the obligation. I think that's totally different. If I'm giving somebody a gift,
I don't I'm not doing it in like, oh, they better get
me back someday. Uh. And in the same vein if I were gonna
save my family, I wouldn't be like, I need your appreciation or something,
even if it was negative, even if they were like, well,
thank you for saving your life, but you're you're fucking you're gay as shit,
bro, like I could never. I could never, and I'd be
like, that's fucked up. But all right, I mean, I guess,
I guess I'm just a decent person and you're not. But whatever,
I still wouldn't I still wouldn't really take back. I wouldn't be like I'm
gonna go ahead. I'm gonna go ahead. I'm gonna go ahead in non
zero, I'm gonna go ahead and not lawyer out of it, just for
the sake of satisfying what you're doing. Aready know you're doing? I promise
no, no, I promise I won't change it. I promise I won't
change it. If you're if you guess correctly, Oh, I didn't think
you were going to. I just did I think you would do? Uh
Uh. We talked about him before Timothy shallow may or whatever the fuck his
name is. That was my first thought. But he's looking a little rough
lately, so no, I think I think, uh, that's so mean
for no reason. But I think I don't know. I feel like I'm
gonna say Tom holland he's he's like, I don't know. We're close enough
that it's like maybe, yeah, you know, I feel like we're close
enough to the point where it's like maybe I could convince myself that he's like
a it's like a clone situation, and this is like, I don't know,
I could figure I could figure this out mentally, you know. Yeah,
why do I Why do I feel like I don't know? Why do
I not know? I was I feel like I should know some famous trans
as women like there's oh, yeah, I don't know either. I was
trying to think they're okay. I got one. I don't remember her name,
but she was on anybody who watches oh well. To be fair,
I haven't watched The Flagrant podcast in a very long time because it kind of
sucks ass now. But Andrew Schultz's podcast, he had on a trans woman.
Uh, and there was a guy that a comedian that came on because
he was like a big fan of hers, and it was like it was
a funny episode. And it was also kind of nice because a lot of
Andrew Schultz fans in that Browie universe, a lot of them are kind of
not down with that shit, but this kind of kind of let their guard
down. So I would choose that chick, this porn star. It was
this trans chick porn star. And I'm like, that's the thing. Like
I said, you didn't say it be male passing. That's how we lawyer
this ship, bro, that's my answer. That's fair. All right,
how much time you got because we're on a tight schedule today, are we
looking for? Yeah? I think I can do well, really yeah,
I can do like probably two. Okay, all right, let's let's get
too then let's get two in and then I'll record the names later, just
so we can get as many questions and as possible. Oh okay, then
yeah, I can probably do it. Just yes, the pandemic? What
the fuck is all that? All right? Three? The three terabytes of
porn on Chris's old MacBook. That's insane. No shot, do I have
three terabytes of porn? I don't even think I have three terribtes of porn
like bookmarked. Honestly, like I don't even think no, no, have
much porn? Yeah, well, honestly, how much are you jacking it
to where you need like, say, really an hour more of Like to
me, it's like you really just need a couple of links that are like
compilations. Really, if if you? If you, because because like really,
how much porn do you? How long are you dra what are you
doing? That was like, man, some people, some people they're up
at five am. They're just jerking it. Some people are up five am,
they're jerking. At six am, they're jerking. At seven am,
they're jerking it. One pm, they're jerking it. I don't know.
Adults have time to goon Like to me, only porns, no, not
porn stars. The uh the what do you call the live streamers that stream
you know, like twitch streamers, but the porn ones, the porn ones
are probably streaming for hours gooning. That's their job. That makes sense.
Who the fuck else is who's time for that shit? I don't know,
but I assure you it's real. I know it, okay, fair enough,
So I don't know. I don't know, man, that's a lot
of porn. Hello, Jimmy Rings, Black Sanna and Derek the Gay.
Just posting this because I've been listening to you guys since the beginning of the
pandemic. That tends about right, that's when we kind of started. I've
had a long road and a lot of changes in my life since then,
lots of ups and downs. Thank you guys for providing the last throughout too.
By the way, I use my I use my last five dollars for
this. Can't wait to hear this from my cardboard box. This is just
a comment. I just wanted to get to it. It seems like it
seems new nice, so I appreciate it. Uh x esque Escamvic wrote in
he says, I got a hypothetical. If you and your co hosts are
in an apocalyptic wasteland, you have no food, who would you all eat
first among each other? Well, Kingston's obviously the first person to go.
There's just more of him. Oh yeah, like we could, we could.
We could rash for a long time. We could rash in kingson off
for years. Yeah, if we're really careful about it. You know,
Kingston is a big boy, what six three or something? Three about been
eating nice and hardy preparing for this. He's been paring, he's been preparing
himself for this scenario. I appreciate that. That's Actually what we've been doing
secretly, is that we underst band that the world is going to end.
So we've been kinda I mean, not to be rude about it, but
we've been kind of We've been giving him certain meals to make sure that when
the day comes, he's not listen, man, he ain't. He's not
outrunning us. We got him. So I think I think we just have
a we have a good situation here where Kingston's gonna last us. He could
Kingston. I think we could. We could last between the two of us
if we're really if we're really diligent about like rationing, we could we could
get a good year and a half out of Kingston. I think if we
like focus on maybe making jerky joey, king will last us for a long
time. Yeah, yeah, easily. So yeah, I think I think
he's easily. We got it. Yeah, yeah, because we're not.
No one's even me. I got nothing, I got off any Yeah,
you might as well. Just I'm like a salad and it's not just it's
not satisfying, but I'm like a salad that her to you. It's like,
it's like if you the least nutritious salad ever, it's just it doesn't
taste very good and it also doesn't help you. So it ain't happened.
I don't think Kicks is gonna taste very good either, but you know,
there's gonna be more of it, and survival is the name of the game.
Yeah, so yeah, really that? Yeah, man, can you
imagine how unfortunate it would be to be in a situation where like you've you're
let's you're crash landed on a desert island and you've been there for like however
many days it takes for starvation to take to take hold, and you start
eating the first person and then help arrives. I'm sure that is a scenario
that has probably actually happened, And yeah, I bet it's just got to
be incredibly awkward, like, oh m, well we did it. It
was necessary. I think we're humans really good at compartmentalizing. We would we
would be like, well, how to do it? You know, they
didn't really get to use the meat, you know, iguanas or something.
God's playing God, you know, like, what are you gonna what are
you gonna do? It's just, uh, well, we have all sorts
of idioms about we have all sorts of manners, manners of speech to get
away with something like that. I think it's like that's just the way the
cookie crumbled. You know, it is what it is, you know,
God's plan. Yeah, dude, I could see it, just like they
they finally hit him, They hit him over the head of the rock.
They kill him, and then they start cutting, they start skinning, and
like the very first slab, a helicopter light shines. Hi guys, we're
here. Yeah, it's great that would happen. That's absolutely what happens.
Yeah, we get home and King's uh, Lily's like where is King storm?
Hm? What is get his King stunt or whatever? And we're like,
man, you know, he just fell overboard. You know, you
guy washed. It was like that Christopher Walking story about that lady that fell
off the boat. Yeah, exactly. It's just you know, I we
can't you know, honestly, he he what happened. See what had happened
was he he was skipping down the down the beach and he tripped and hit
his head on a gun that went off and shot him in the and it
blew his head out, and uh and you know, yeah, it was
it was pretty gruesome. I'm glad you weren't there to see it, Lily,
you would have been really really taken it back by it. I think,
uh really sorry. Here's here's five gallons of piss as a as a
Yeah, just a token of our you know, of mourning that hopefully this
will help you cope in any way, shape or form. Yeah, we
weren't able to make much of his body, but here's the here's the jerky.
Here's the jerky that we made out of his shins. Yeah, we'll
just uh to you, Okay. She vacuum seals it and keeps it on
a mantle like somebody would with an earth Yeah, it's it's it's like a
bouquet. It's like a bouquet of shin jerky. Yo. Man of Action
rodes Is, Hey, boys, I'm back. Cool hypothetical here. Imagine
if you are jerking off to straight porn and just when the guy's about to
come, he runs up to the camera Jesus through the screen and Auntie,
what do you do? Then? Yo? I can't even express angry.
That would like that would both that would send me into such a First of
all, I would feel so disrespected and shamed, and then also feel so
I would feel so shaken in my understanding of how reality functions that I feel
like that those two intense emotions at the same time, I think would have
the potential to probably break me and make me insane. I think, yeah,
it would send me. If my immediate thought would would be I'm dreaming.
I'm clearly dreaming. I am lucid right now, especially because I I
just don't I don't watch porn with men in it. I just I the
the dude, the dude fucking like if if he says one fucking word or
any type of groaning and grunting, I'm just not into it. I just
don't like kind of immediate male moaning and shit. I'm like, ah,
no thing. If you're gonna be if like if you're having sex, it's
different, but like if you're if you're filming porn, shut up, yeah,
shut up, Like sorry, just be the stud, keep your mouth
fucking shut. Whatever. But obviously I know some women like that, but
I'm like, I don't know there's in there gay porn. You can watch
that ship. But anyway, Yeah, it's if, yeah, if that
happened to me for sure, And then I and then and then all of
a sudden, I verify that this is real life. I am absolutely in
a saint asylum. I'm I'm I'm gone the strip jacket. They're putting me
away. They're putting me away. It's like you're just saying that you got
km on by the computer. And I'd be like, yes, I swear
to you. I know this sounds insane, but I promise you he can't.
The computer came on me, and then I'd be I'd be in a
straight jacket. I'd be in a padded room and you would never be able
to get me out of there. Yeah, that would piss me off so
much. And the fucking the the psychiatrist or whatever that that's evaluating you.
It's he he he You see him. You see the back of his head
in his chair, and then he swivels around and it's the fucking guy porn
star, just wearing a lab code. You can see his abs. Yes,
what seems to be what seems to be the problem. Like I did
that? He would I like that I did that he would ask that question
even though you're already in a psychiatric hospital. So it seems to be the
problem. So what brings you here? So? What brings you here?
Oh? God, so good? You know? That would I don't know,
man, that would that would be too much. That would be too
much. That would really shatter me. I think that is a hilarious thing
to imagine, though, I do. I do appreciate the the the image
of that. Uh see, I think we got probably a lot more.
One more. Yeah, let's see. Let's think it a good one.
Okay, Kendrick raped Drake not the Nickelodeon one Road and he says, hey,
Mommy, Daddy and creepy uncle. In light of the Fallout show reviving
the Games, it also revived the most annoying fandom. I'm a part of
Fallout New Vegas fans. What are some annoying fandoms that you guys are a
part of. I'm not a part of any fandom, honestly, Like I
like Halo a lot, but like I I don't know, Like there's no
shot I'm gonna be there's a distinction a New Vegas fans. They're fallowing New
Vegas fans. Are fucking they I do want to I want to slap them.
They're they're being they're being ridiculous, Like, yeah, fallow Obsidian did
a great fucking job. It's a it's a it's a it's a fun game.
But but I'm be honest, and it may be really controversial. And
I would also say the numbers really prove my point, and even that Fallout
four is just a much enjoyable game overall, and why they said the numbers
obviously, and and even people who are really diehard fans of the Fallout series.
People I went on my Steam and I would see people booting up Fallout
four. They're not booting up fucking New Vegas. They're booting up fall four.
They d I joined that experience better, That's what I've been doing.
And I tried. By the way, I was like, you know what,
I should play New Vegas because it's the only one that I didn't finish.
It's the only one I started it so many times, and then just
like kind of fell off it and I went, I boot it up New
Vegas and I played about four hours of it. And it's well written and
it's good and I like it, but like, fuck, it kept crashing.
Still it crashes all the fucking time, and it's it. And then
also quite honestly like the yeah, I know that it's I know that I
would never say that it's not the best written Fallout game, because I think
it's by almost objectively true, by like a wide, objectively provable margin.
But like, I don't know, I kind of don't like that map nearly
as much as I like the Fallout four map or the Fallout three map,
and Fought four is just so much more playable that I just got to a
point where it's like, well, I'm thinking of thame crashing. I don't
really like this map that much. I'm gonna play fall At four and I've
been playing it for fucking twenty five hours because it's just right. It's just
really good to play. It's not nearly as well written, for sure,
but like, sure, I don't care, really like I don't I'm not
this. I know that that probably sounds like really annoying, but like,
if I'm coming to play a game, but first of all, if I'm
coming to play a game that I've played before already, you know, the
writing of the game is not really as important to me as like how how
much fun am I having and how good does it feel to play? Like
those are almost like way more, way more important. It's like Stellar Blade.
Stellar Blade is really great to play. That story is so dumb,
it's unbelievable. It is such a stupid, stupid story, But who cares.
I don't care because it's really talk it's enjoyable. Yeah, a lot
of Platinum games, for example, like a I played Devil May Christ five,
I don't remember the story at all, but I remember having a lot
of fun playing the game, or most the only Devil May Christ story that
I remember is hit the origin like story of his business, Devil May Cry
starting and stuff like, but like I remember that's where because I beat it
so many times. But everything else I have no idea, doesn't fucking matter
to me at all. I feel the same way about a lot of Bethesda
games in general, where I'm having so much fun in the world, like
like a fucking Elder Scrolls or a Fallout right and I'm having a lot of
fun in the Fallout four world, And I didn't boot it up again because
I actually played it two years ago, because I remember I was like,
I played this recently and so it feels it was recent enough to where I'm
like, I, I'm fine. I did try to be like Fallout three,
and guess what, it won't launch for me. I fucking patched it
too, and it won't launch for me. It just won't do it.
And I'm like, I'm like, bro, I can't. I literally can't
play it. I thought it was so funny. Yeah, yeah, I
don't fall for us good. It's a good game, man, like I
I you know, it's fun man, it's it's it's good. I like
those. I like, it's it's got me. Yeah, I'm two years
ago is too recent. I haven't played it since probably probably since it first
came out, really like they were still coming out with those, Like I
remember the newest expansion at the time that I stopped playing was that Amusement Park
one. It was like Nuka World or something, Nuka Colo, nuk World
or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah, And that was pretty soon after
release. I'm pretty sure, like that was no more than a year.
So like it's been it's fucking seven years since seven years since I played it,
and I'm remembering a lot of it as I'm playing through it. It's
like, oh yeah, I remember this. I remember Fatten Nick Valentine in
the in the subway, and I'm like, I'm remembering things as I'm playing
again, but like it's pretty good. And I haven't played Far Harbor either,
that apparently is like pretty good too. Like, so there's some stuff
that I'm I'm glad I waited because I have all this like stuff that's kind
of like accumulated over time. But yeah, no, Fall four is fucking
great. It's not an amazing story, but like I really don't, I
really don't care. I don't care. I don't, but I wouldn't.
I wouldn't consider myself a part of an annoying fandom. I think the closest
I would the closest it would get is like the Halo, I guess is
the closest. But even even that, I'm kind of like, I don't
know, I'm kind of jaded too at this point. Yeah, kind of
out of it. I think the only fandoms I'm like, the only fandom
that I'm truly a part of is the Simpsons, and the Simpsons I'd more
call it a community is the best out of anything. Just the memes that
are shared. Nobody's doing this weird shit, like trying to steal shit and
take credit for It's just like people are just putting shit out, shit posting,
sharing fucking scenes, and then people are just quoting. And I've literally,
out of all the years that I've been following this shit, not one
ayota aota of of drama have I ever even come across. And it's been
kind of cool, like just yeah, we just appreciate this show in the
well, Okay, there was one little thing. It was there was some
people writing essays trying to say the last good season was season eight. There's
some fucking runs trying to convince people, and I'm like that it's just it's
just untrue. It's it's just unfucking true. And I hate video I hate
most video essays. Yeah, they really take take something that is only like
kind of interesting to think about, and then they they just exhausted to the
point where it's like like that that happened kind of recently with like because Seinfeld
has like a famously like not loved finale or whatever, and there's been I've
seen this thing going around. It's like, well, it's like, yeah,
the middle seasons of Seinfeld are the best. And then at the end,
it gets it gets really bad because it becomes uh, really cartoony,
and I'm like, the whole show is fucking ridiculous, like the entire time,
Like the first season is way grounded, and the second season it's pretty
grounded, but ever since, like season three onward, it's fucking absurd.
Kramer gets In season three, Kramer gets arrested for being a fucking serial killer
in California. Like it's it's it's it's immediately cartoony, like from the get
they just kind of I don't know, like there was this whole thing.
It's like, yeah, the last two seasons are like really where Seinfeld loses
its way and I'm like, it's literally that's not true at all. It
becomes more of what it's always been, really naturally over over time, and
then it ends. It's it's not a great ending, I would agree,
but like I mean, like the last episode, that's where it really kind
of becomes a little weird. But I don't know, says are annoying anyway.
Yeah, absolutely, get the right, let's wrap it up and get
ourselves out of here. Ball and chain. All right, We'll see you
guys, We'll see you guys. Next time, I'm gonna read the names
now, give Derek some time, but we'll see you next time. I
remember star Tank dot shop. Uh, paton dot com slash of stark Tank
five dollars to get access to the early access shop and ask questions on the
show. All that jazz may five dollars up against your question gets your name
right at the end of the show. Uh, thank you for your support.
We'll see you next time. Sweeney should be back by next time.
By the way, up, guys, I'm gonna be the one reading the
uh the the names today. I'm gonna be doing it. So we're gonna
do it right now. We got round eyed Asian. I was just watching
something where I heard that. I don't I don't remember whatever I was watched
anyways, I am the com don't weigh a come, don't Oh that's uh,
I am wait. I am the cum don't weigh a com don't need
the to come to get erect upon his meet. By that, there's balls
Timate by Denzel Comy. That's pretty that's pretty good. I like that.
By the way, it might am I the only one who thought the first
time I heard that song, I thought it was some British nigga, Like
I swear like the way that it sounds. It sounds like like someone like
some British dude was rapping. And then it's like, oh no, there's
Denzel Cerry. He's from He's from the States, he's from here, And
I like, well, it's just the vibe. That's what it sounds like
to me. But anyway, who puts the sex in sex offender? Yeah,
that's me Zero with a hero Hercules, Benya, Benya been all up,
Benya mcg The Spank Tank starring Dick gay Cum, Harry Blackman and long
Penie very hot. Uh oh, I gotta make this a little longer like
my not penis hot ones. But the wings are covered in increasingly increasingly levels
of thick ropey, dripping, scorching coum that makes you gag and burp.
The home deepote day laborers who touched my son. I'm sorry, raging cancer,
it's funny to me. Miguel O'Hara's chair pussy, Walton Gaggins turrean pussy
in this life for the next I'm molested twenty three Vietnamese boys and all I
got was this lousy t shirt. It's a prank, bro as he placed
a semen in his penis. That's crazy. Pussy boy wanted beef after Galactic
acquisition. Wipe me down because I'm covered in. Come little Boozy nice Jack,
the world's fastest Maori and the only snark Tank fan from New Zealand.
I wonder if you are the only snark Tank fram from New Zealand. If
that's the case, whenever I make it to New Zealand, you and I
will have to have a I don't know if you guys say pines over her
too, I'm assuming you do. You guys talk about fighting wolves. Meanwhile,
I want to throat train Blade from Elden Ring. I want to kiss
his red rocket. That's come on, man. You saw the manzories nude
right, saw his nude mods? If not, I'm sure I posted them.
I don't know. I'll pull them up if I can. I mean
what, I guess you could just google it real fast. Big Meaty stinks,
Andy of the man who's handies are asked here and Dandy Drake Cox slapping
Kendrick in the face. I mean, he probably can do that. If
you take Tim Pule's beanie off. He looks like cuppead. Yeah, I'm
sure he does. Did you see he was at some like conference or something
in Florida where everybody's wearing suits and he still had the fucking beanie on.
I'm like, come on, man, can you not at least just put
on a nice like golf hatter, at least if you still want to be
you still want to conceal your baldness, Like, just put on a nice
hat. You can't even do that, man, like Damn Heath Smoker,
Gids, Uncle Magic molesting Tom Sweeney at the ripe age of thirty at his
own birthday party. That's facts, lick lick. What? Why can I
not say this like grit le grit tiggus cornbread. I don't know why I'm
struggling to say that Tarik Nasid's secret white gay lever facts. S'more MoU homeless
transfam who comes Kendrick raped Drake? Not the Nickelodeon? Would I pissed it
all at once like the sha Wait I piss it all. I pissed it
all at once like the shower in br twenty forty nine. Very cool,
Okay, I get it now, I get it. Okay, I'm a
fucking blade runner. I'm too I just never heard anybody do that. BR
twenty forty nine. I don't know. I just maybe I'm just not familiar
with that. I'm too medic I'm too medically and profoundly horny for racism.
I didn't know that that was a thing that that could happen. Listen to
swords drawn by Army of the Farohs and see if you recognize the sample they
are Like Jennime Trix, I definitely know Army of the Farols. They've they've
collabed, for sure, they for sure collabsed. That's funny swords drawn and
then the storm of swords. I wonder if I've heard that. I'll check
it out because I'm completely aware of those dudes. One of my lectures got
cut by the lead singer of the Pixies. I love that. I once
saw Sweety do fifty slow handstand push ups. I need that footage. KC
my curse. There is come burning to fun you you will wait, will
you come for me? I've I've actually thought about doing that one since I
since I already covered that on my main channel, I was thinking I should
just do this, but gay since I already have the I have the instrumentals
already. I could just do I just do it real fast. I've also
I thought about doing a different a different kill switch one of the song when
Darkness Falls. I was gonna call like when Gainness Calls or something, and
I've been working it out of my head. But whatever, let's see,
mister pants, can you can you show a oh do? Can you do
a deep dive extra Ammo on Destiny the guy? I wouldn't mind doing it,
but I would ask I'll ask the boys next time they hear I'll ask
them if they want to do that. I wouldn't mind doing it because it's
funny that I'm reading this right now, because this morning, in my head,
I was just thinking about his arc, his villainous ark, and what
he's doing it and why he's doing it. And I don't know if it's
just like if it's a money thing. I don't know if he got money.
I don't know if he's just trying to be the ultimate contrarian. But
I know he doesn't believe what he's saying because of arguments he's made in the
past, like Destiny is not a stupid person. And I'm like the arguments
he's made against Ethno states and the reason why Ethno states would never work,
especially to peacefully remove people from a popular from an area where they do not
want to go, Like it is impossible to move people peacefully if they don't
want to move, if violence will take place. That's the only way to
move them if they don't want to move. And so he's made these arguments
before and how peaceful Ethno states could never work, and say somewhere like the
United States, because the brown people don't want to leave and you would have
to forcefully remove them. You'd have to violently remove them. And so you
can extrapolate that to what has happened over the decades with Israel and Palestine.
Like, so it's like he knows this, and so his argument and where
he stands. I know he knows he's arguing not in good faith. But
the question is why, And unfortunately he won't tell us why because that would
give up his his you know, the jig would it would be up,
and then the cat would be out of the bag, and then that would
not look good on h him. So I don't know his motivation, and
only I'm pretty sure only he knows and maybe someone who paid him, or
if it's just his own his own volition, just wanting to be like,
I'm going to argue on the side of ethnic cleansing and and see how well
I can justify it. It's crazy, but you know, I digress.
Ballow the first sin spum befutters, stop calling me neurodivergent and say what you
want to say. You're African American, I know, right, Like I
just I just don't want I don't like look, man, I don't want
to use autistic as a pejorative. So I want people to understand when when
when it's saying when you're saying neurodivergent, I want people to understand what I'm
actually saying and not just calling somebody autism autistic in the way that it's like
an insult. And I mean that you literally are autistic, you know what
I'm saying, Like, I feel like some people need that differentiation. I
don't even know that word, but I think just to understand what I'm trying
to say and not just oh, I'm just trying to insult you or whatever,
because just being autistic does it is not purely an insult. It's just
like, oh, You probably are doing this because you're autistic, And I
don't mean that as a bad thing. It's just like you see the world
do this lens, So this is probably why you know. As an example,
I'm just trying to give an example, where do we go African American?
That's funny. I like that, though. I understand what you're saying,
neurodivergent in quotations and African American in quotations. I totally, I totally
understand where you're coming from. Jolly o dipshit flint dribble, owner of the
dibble, the dibble, the Dibsdale dibble dome. Geez, that was hard
to say. May thy load, drip and splatter, cipher graph, fiberglass,
flesh ripe, flesh light prank Ayo, Philly looking way better than New
York right now. Yeah, gay butcher Pete be like he's whacking and jacking
and pack and stupid hunter du bois out of spells, not shit else hosing
the homeless with dirty brown water. Yeah, you just get that flint water
and just hose them all down. Give us your dong, Give us your
dong. You're the penis man. Give us your dong. Tonight, we're
all in the mood for a slab of meat and my booties filled up nice.
Damn, I can't I can't tell what that is. Damn. I
hate when I can't tell, because then you can't spend too much time thinking
about it. You gotta move on. You must go to the Bodega system,
Caucasian container, the cracker barrel for gays. Disgruntled Donald Trump burping on
Dom's clip. I love that. That was a fun segment, fun little
bit. My granny shits with the dorm. Come on, Grandma, Like
it's how interesting is that though? Because you feel like old school ladies probably
have the most like like uh, they have the most trauma of you.
You you dare can't do anything that would be perceived a manly thing to do,
like a man just leaving the door wide open and shitting like that seems
like something like a man would do, and like usually grandma's were so like
probably beaten up back in the day for doing anything. That's like, hey,
sonny, miss, you're a perfect little angel. You do everything writing.
If you don't do it right, I'm gonna kill you, you know
kind of you know, you know what I mean? Max silhouette. I
convinced my friends twenty five years old that a camel second hump is where they
store their piss. I made sure to come clean because I remember you.
Let's see. Yeah, so that's funny. I mean, that's a harmless
one unless they try to write a paper about it. That that would have
been crazy or something. But that's pretty good. She pipkin on my pip
up possum Chris Milk's marsupials on the Weekends. I didn't know that, Derek,
Please stop being wrong all the time. I like when people say stuff
like that, but then like they never elaborate, like, say, this
happens all the time. When you see people in chats, will they just
say you're wrong or something like that, and they'll never elaborate on why or
how or anything. And it's because they ninety nine point nine percent of the
time have nothing constructive or of value to say. It's how what happens.
And sometimes that's the annoying part. I don't mind people telling me I'm wrong
because I'm a human being. Right, you can be wrong, you're human.
There's something fascinating about when people try to point and laugh at you or
try to be like, oh, you're wrong or something. It's like,
well, yeah, like you can't always be right. The hell are you
talking about? And then it's just like, well, just explain calmly what
you think I'm wrong about, and then we can agree to disagree, or
I can explain it, or I can concede or anything like that. So
I'm looking forward to you changing your name next time and explaining on how I'm
wrong or you know, DM Mela, explain yourself. Okay, maybe slightly
above average clit energy? How about just masterful clit energy? How about these
the best clit energy you know? How about epic clit energy? I like
that? Like Masterful's good. Epic clit energy sounds pretty good. How about
that? I like that? Let's see, how how can I be homophobic?
I blew as fucking brains up. That's so stupid. I like that.
Just the hard r Star coffee, rip the digital hookah. Now I'm
getting molested on the set of Embryonic Sheldon stupid. Once I've learned from one,
I think you meant to put thing. One thing I've learned from this,
Drake versus Kendrick is that the Toronto accent is fucking awful. Somehow the
worst than Sweetish accents. Swedish actions aren't that bad. I don't mind sweetest
actions. They are a little silly, though they are silly. Toronto accents
are bullshit completely. I feel like they were recently manufactured in the way like
I don't even think that it's like old, you know what I'm saying,
Like in a way that most dialects have not been invented that long ago.
Like I would say the latest dialect that exists is the Valley Girl accent,
right, I think that was the most recent. That's only been like a
couple of decades. And this new Toronto thing, I feel like it's fairly
new, Like I don't think you can go that far back, and then
there was people in Toronto that were talking like that. I could be totally
wrong, but I just feel like this conversation would have propped up a long
time ago because it is that bad. The Toronto accent is that bad.
My son froze to death in the waste of Ohio by going homeless to pay
you Fox, and this is now his memorial, Rip John. I appreciate
that man, great sacrifice. Transfim Grenlin exposing people with the lactose intolerance of
ninety million rotogens of ionizing radiation. Yosh wormst Craig the Canadian featuring a icy
hand job from a frosty Edmonton hooker. That sounds awful, but I'll take
it. It's your boy, Shawne d Gilbert Godfrey voice. I hit it,
I hit it from the back. I can't do I can't. I
can't do that. I hit it from the back and play whack them all
a third tapeworm. I know Chris can do a good Gilbert. I think
so he'll he'll have to do that one next time. Three x SO and
the Flintstones Tub Girl pilot episode. I love man that. I went back
that that fucking Flintstone show was funny as fuck to me, Like I usually
I think it's in the podcast. I don't listen back to myself very often
on the podcast, but you know, other than when it's just going through
the editing. But like that, that ship was making me laugh. I
was at the gym, like laughing my ass off. Anyway. There is
no cock like horse cock. Send your asshole. Oh yeah, there's no
cocklack horse cock, send your asshole in the shock. Yeah that's pretty good.
You need horse cock, of course horse cock. That's a crazy ass
song man slurpin stroke and smoke and joking emoticons going like this. I guess
I should go like this because my I think my thing is reversed. Uh
steep drip mh Lord of homeless drip ello cool Jay's voice. Don't call it
a cum shot, stupid, obi once you blow me. Jackson Vernon,
Norwegian game dev now developing a cardboard quest. I am homeless, dude,
cardboard quest stupid. I like that, Hey, good on you. Kremlin
to Grimlin dib Membrane is our only lif skined hispanic rep. I'm gonna steal
your bones. She as a rath on my Metreon till I zenthos, that's
very cool. One fish, two fish, gay fish, swenfish zoo by
Denzel Furry. We got two Denzel Curry references. Interesting and routing out our
list and rounding out our list. The King of Haphazard, that's false.
Alarm racists fallout. Walter Goggins be like, know what we used to call
your kind before the bombs fell? Dark dark darkie damn can you imagine?
Wade slave five eight three A sad guy from Michigan. I'm sorry, you're
sad telling the boys it isn't gay to join the snark Tank sex colt as
bottoms, but I'm secretly crossing my fingers. Dude, if we have a
gay sex cult and I'm unaware of this, I'm gonna be very upset.
I'm gonna be very very upset because this is something that I would want to
openly talk about and be very proud of. All Right, the Brini Bros
Present the Master ROASTI flow drink Master Corn's Sacred Water and got straight to pop
and lunch lunches, Sin Zu Bean very cool. Donkerson Dagoba D's nuts in
your mouth. I probably said that wrong, installing a faulty nearolink in Chris's
head that plays thunder on replete. You gotta pay the trolls. Told again
the boys whole gade six is afraid of Gaide seven because seven gapes nine.
That's fucking awesome. I didn't know when Chris was reading this that it was
two separate names, So like Gaatee six is guy and then this dude,
knowing that he was next, he continued it. That's very clever. I
didn't know that Chris didn't mention it because he sucks sometimes. Robinhood and little
John fucking in the four lot of golly, what a gay Roberhood and Little
John fucking in the four is I don't know why that that fucking rules.
That's a good one. I feel like that's something. Maybe maybe deep diving
more into more Disney shit would be good. Man, that's fucking awesome.
Sween reading the names was awesome. You do two shows a week, Have
Chris do the first, then Sween or Derek do the second one. Yeah,
what, I I think we should probably rotate. I think you should
just rotate like uh, I'm sure you guys would. You guys would prefer
that. So I'll bring it up next time, or at least if I
don't bring it up, it will bring it up again once this name is
read again. D z queif ah help fuck the dumbest lesbian. I'm sure
you're not the dumbest. I'm sure you know you give yourself some credit.
I'll carpet bomb the goss strip for a quarter, so great. John Strickland
ooh, okay, chronic herpes by come forty. There's no spaces in this
so see my boys getting stuffed and drowned a huge orgy with so much sound
it's actually kind of hard to read without spaces a little bit. It's a
little harder. It's kind of funny. Mark's eighteen eighty nine. I really
hope Mike Tyson kills Jake Erry. I mean, I mean, we we
all want that. But like Lit's just don't get your hopes up too high,
man, don't get your hopes up too high. Like God. I
would love that though, wouldn't that be great? The First Church of Keith
David. Will you wanta be like goon with me, goon with me and
will be in a world of savage masturbation. Yeah, it's pretty good.
Second Church of Key David featuring being better than the First Church of Keith David
nice pre raz Blake eight nine. I swear I thought I just read that.
No, I guess not. I gotta hit up that bitch Delphine.
Need to get myself some elf man ass at the thar More Embassy. Yeah,
yeah, why not? You should happy? Oh and they have the
I like the your your avatars that fucked up animation or drawing or whatever of
Norman Osborne that looked like the game Boy Advance or something. This was so
funny. Uh. Picture of Swen that says happy belated birthday. Swing,
Also, you're gay plays into Sandman poorly. Hell yah, Chris trying to
read like Papa Papa. Yeah, I notice. Yeah, I noticed a
couple of people do that. I've not He was the first person I've ever
noticed do that, and somebody else. I was probably listening to a podcast
and I heard them by Papa Papa, and I was like, I was
like, is that like a thing? Like multiple people do that, And
it's not just Chris Okay Kingston falling down an escalator that takes him up as
fast as he falls down. That's crazy. That's crazy, so that he
just fucking stays suspended, falling forever. I love that Alaska oil fill of
trash Texas tater salad Swen with the face of a ten year old white Oh
yeah, that's right. I forgot about that, dude. Can you imagine
Sue Hulk took on my ass. Here's Nicky Ziggy. Nicky Ziggy, congratulations
on the engagement to uh one of the gayest men. I'm just kidding,
but well, well, I mean maybe I'm not going maybe you actually agree
with that. Haamaanahammana awuga Sorry, Miss Jackson, badly brave hugger, Derek
duck Hunt, the vegan necromancer, I got consent. Nice etherean Brogerian hunter.
Uh oh, malefis one. Finally a rehabilitated and finally rehabilitated and back
in the saddle with two functioning hands. Let's go and rounding out the list.
Finally, Dan, how long was this? How long was this?
Let's see, let's see where's my timer? What the hell? Okay wait,
let me just say this King of Haphazard is the last one. I
should just say this before I fucking but like I think my stuff was.
Oh it was too crunched up. Twenty two minutes. I got clocked in
right now. But you know, I'm gonna cut it probably just a little
bit. So there you go. Thank you guys for uh if you made
it this far, appreciate you all very much. If you listen to this
entire thing, what do I want you to do? In order for you
to know that you listen to this entire thing? You can you can do
one of two things. You either you either need to DM me on Instagram
or at me on at me on Twitter and you need to say cummies.
You just just just send me the word cummies and that lets me know you
made it all the way through. So on Instagram at some BG you know
what. No, no, no, no, no, don't no no
no, I'm sorry. Not on my personal thing. Go to the snark
tank ig, you know, because I need to start using that more.
So. Go to the snark tank Instagram. I think it's just called snark
tank ig. Sorry if it's not. And just either DM comment on something
whatever because there's not much traffic on there, so I will see it because
I just don't want to miss it. If it's on the personal stuff,
there's too much traffic going in and out. So just put cummies anywhere to
let me know that you made it all the way to the end, and
I'll let you know that you're a true homeless person. You have no fucking
money, alright, Take care, guys,