Kathy and Elliott Lewis on stage. Katty Lewis Elliott Lewis, two of the
most distinguished names in radio, appearing each week in their own theater, starring
in a repertory of transcribed stories of their own. And you're choosing radio's foremost
players and radio's foremost plays. Drama, comedy, adventure, mystery, melodrama,
Ladies and gentlemen. Mister Elliott Lewis, good evening, May I present
my wife Jack Good Evening. A thief and his money are soon parted.
What is there a misquote? It should be a fool, But I want
to explain something about tonight's story, which is called Dig the Thief and is
about a man named John Digby played by you, and his adventures in the
state of New Mexico with a lovely girl named Cecily played by you. The
script was written by Morton Sein and David Freakin, and as a matter of
fact, there are several thieves involved. I'm not the only one. But
to find that out, we Dig the Thief. Oh oh, oh,
oh, well there it is. There's the town spread out like she is
like a little jewel in the valley. Can I say something atter? Digby,
it's allowed. All the tona is looking so pretty, full of moon
and all I love a love people sleeping peaceful. Ain't gonna last long?
Is it? Long as I've been hanging around the ranch? Mister Digby,
we never had a chivalry like this. Ah you sure something? Well?
Good to have you bored? Did Jamison girl? Okay, I'm right here
beside you, mister Digby. I'm fine riding the way you said, posting
the way you said. You know it works out real night. Well pass
the word back. Get ready, I get ready, get ready, get
ready, you get ready. I'll sat, mister Digby, I'll set then
all right, let's go, ah man, you me uh to me,
me spream and the board all right on him. I've hosted there for you.
You can get out, go home, you can get back to the
ranch, and you, dig Me, you can drop dead. What'll I
do? I didn't do anything. You've been chewing local weeks, dig Me?
What are they? You take a bunch of guests from a dude ranch?
You chew up? It's a town of otis. What do you use
blacks? Mister Conell? You to I told you to take the guests for
a moonlight ride. I told you no hanky panky, dig be he specifically,
I told you, I remember saying it, haggern Card. You were
leaning up against the corral fins, chopping on a straw and covering up the
turb and I told you yet no, Yeah, now I remember. Uh,
mister Cornell, you're fired. Mister Conwell, when you hired me to
take charge of guest relations, you said I could have a free reign.
You impressed me with the importance of recreating the Old West. I also old
you no hanky panky. Well, that's the kind of ombre you are not
i'd heard. Okay, mister Conel. Three days I worked for you,
fifteen dollars a day, he means, join me five. Your bar was
fifty. Well, we'll pay for him. Wiltie Feller, No sure,
sure what you're always so sleepy, mister Southgate. We are taking a collection
for Digby five dollars. Oh well, I'll pass the words. We're taking.
Oh, here's five bucks. It was worth it. You happy now,
mus Codels, get out of here, dig Me, get back to
the ranch, get your gear and get As I was walking the speed,
some lout radio. Hey, Hey, how about a lift. Hey are
you a uh hey, hey, you going my way? As in the
riot? You got your get inna sit up front of me? A fine?
Ah no, what begin to think this ride would never come? I'm
sorry I was a little late leaving the house, he ended. Uh uh,
ask you a question. Sure what tribe you come from? Apache left
the reservation last year? House tricks can't complain. What are you doing now?
You know? Yeah, you know, took up a trade at the
reservation school, or how to drive a Cadillac? Got a job? All
the boys are doing that now, all the boys still wearing the long braids
like you. I'll have mister Ramsey's idea for local color. You know how
mister Ramsey is. Mister Ramsey, Uh how he is? Oh? Well,
sure, sure glad I caught you. Else mister Ramsey would have well,
you know, oh we had your biting butts. Eh, let's say
nh uh you got a cigarette if you like work too? Yeah? Sure
here that's Oh, mister Ramsey's sure gonna be glad to see you. Just
walk right up there into the house. You're expected. Thanks a lot,
cheafie, get along with thank you, Haldie. Oh Hali, please come
in. I'm Cicely Ramsey. Uh, of course. Uh, how's mister
Ramsey? Fine, Dad and I just came in from a gallop. He's
tethering the horses. Uh, Dad's tethering'em. He never let anyone else
do it. Well, well, what, well, I hope I'm not
interrupting anything. Oh no, no, oh, what's the matter Why he's
staring at me? I'm sorry, you're not the type, that's all.
Oh, please don't do that. It scuffs the rug Yuh sorry, No,
you're not the type at all. Well, I've had the virus some
of who goes around digging in tombs like you do? What? Uh?
I guess it's silly of me, miss Johnny Wall, but I expected someone
to. Uh Dusty was a pis helman. No, don't do that the
rug. No, I'm sorry. You're the most bashful archaeologian. Oh uh,
well, we we don't come up very often. That's why all the
sunlight. Uh whew. Must be very interesting work though. Oh my yes,
digging up artifacts. Well that's the best part. Uh. You and
Dennis will get along just fine. Dennis, my fancy daddy wrote you about
him. Sure. Oh oh that Dennis yeah, Dennis. I can hardly
wait to meet him. Is he here? He's flying in? Dennis is
flying in? Is he as soon as he heard? Oh about the pot?
Oh, of course he'll be here the first thing in the morning.
You too will get along. Wa. Well, he's he's so very interesting
like you. Oh well, sure that's because he's in archaeology. Sure.
Oh yeah, he's just a student. He's at Harvard, you know,
majoring in archaeology. But he's having such a difficult time. You know,
this is the second time he's repeating Assyrian tombs one. Well, no wonder,
that's the hardest part. Oh, royal in here. Look he's here,
daddy. Well, hello, young man, howdy good, very good,
your honeywell, aren't you. I've made arrangements that mister Honeywell take the
spare suite in the west wing. Good, very good. Now, uh
you run along, Sesaly. Mister Honeywell and I have a lot to talk
about. We were having such an interesting conversation. Isn't he the youngest darkiologist
ever? It was such a reputation. Yep. Uh, don't do that
to the rug. Honeywell. Sorry, run along, sessily. You'll see
mister honeywell, and dinners honeywell, bye, ma'am whoa honeywell? Let me
take a look at you, Yes, sir, cert indeed, sir,
you do. You'll do fine? Now, Uh look, mister Ramsey,
my time's pretty valuable. There's digging to be done. You'll do? You
do fine? Yes, sir? Yes, archaeologists come high, expensive education
supplies, pith helmets and all. I wrote you in the letter ten percent,
didn't I ten percent? Well, yeah, I just dropped in to
day to tell you wasn't enough. All the way from Chicago, I was
passing by anyhow, on my way to Pultepec, the Inca country. You
know. Okay, make it fifteen percent. Well that's a lot better.
Come on, I'll show it to you this way, I'll bet you.
Eh. Well, what have you got to say? I hardly know?
I thought so stunners, aren't they all? Three? Have you ever seen
better examples of prehistoric Indian pottery in your life? Hardly? Ever? Those
pots are four or five thousand years old, wouldn't you say? Ooh,
give a little, take a little without a crack? Well, I really
build them in those days. I think we can get ten grand apiece for
them. Yeah, uh, ten grand sounds fair, especially since the ceiling's
off. Huh uh uh? Which one do you like? Who cares?
Oh? That middle one is my favorite? Black buffaloes too. Who's he?
Who? The Indian boy that made him four or five thousand years ago
last Thursday? Now, remember my daughter thinks they're yours. You shipped him
a head. That's the story in case anyone asks you might if I ask
you a question, mister Ramsey, well, how else you gonna know who's
going to give you ten thousand apiece for last Thursday's pots? Have you ever
heard of Harvard boy Dennis, your daughter's fiance, loaded boy, and I'm
the archaeologist who's gonna tell him they're worth ten thousand? He worships you?
Why that boy rocks himself to sleep reading or pat pipathies? Pots are phony?
They foods? You didn't they any well? Or flash judgment? I
didn't put the calipers on them or even uh e phony? Yeah, well,
these Harvard boys haven't got your ear. And Dennis is loaded a four
million and he ain't reel bright. He collects old crocs sill. He's my
intended son in law. I shouldn't speak too harshly. He's a fine boy,
great swimmer, always swims underwater, remarkable, and you're going to swindle
him out of thirty thousand dollars. We are you and me for twenty percent.
I am listen you. I found out about you. You have You've
got a good reputation, but you haven't got two shovels to rub to get
take it or leave it. I'll take it fine. Well, what times
did it? Sir mister Ramsey? You are listening to Kathy and Elliott Lewis
on stage tonight's play Dig the Thief in your town, in the next town
across the nation, you will find the Red Cross. But the Red Cross
is above and beyond all boundary lines, for it is infinite in its scope.
In time of hardships, epidemics, floods, fires, the Red Cross
is the symbol and soul of humanity. You are part of that symbol because
it is the money you contribute that enables the Red Cross to continue its great
work. Answer the call, and humanity will answer you with gratitude. Hey
with Cecily, Hi, Hi, Hi, good morning morning. What are
you doing out here so early? Scanning the horizon? Where Hey plays the
whole horizons for Dennis. He's arriving this morning. He flies, you know,
oh, his own plane. He'd be furious if he knew I was
scanning for it. Oh, he doesn't like people have watched swims a lot
underwater, you know. Well, things like that you have to respect with
Cecily. Why don't we just take a walk, work up an appetite for
breakfast. Just see the haze on the gorse, you know. Walk.
I'd love to, But uh huh, what should we talk about? Pick
a subject? Atioch who Patioch Jans was telling me about the remarkable work you
did there. Most are so fascinating working in those old excavations. Yure,
Well, there's no excavation like an old excavation. Dennis always says that too.
Well, he must have read it in one of my pamphlets. That
was the title of one of your pamples. Don't you remember it? Or
of you? Necessily. Let's not talk about old ruins. Let's talk about
you. Why I'm really nothing? No, no, I I must tell
you something that's amazing, and perhaps you won't believe it, but it's true.
When I dug up the sarcophagus of a wondrous and beautiful Egyptian princess.
No, uh, don't walk, stay here. I I really must tell
you about it all right on her tomb was painted, her portrait unbelievably beautiful,
with a serenity almost got its slightly. The first time I saw you,
I said to myself, Princess or Cyrus of the Seventh Moon, you
are wade. What let's take off our moccasins and wade. Yeah, that's
just what I've been trying to say, necessily, Let's take off our moccasins
and wade. Yeah. I haven't had a cold foot bath before breakfast since
Antiyok, you better hold my hands to honey, thank you? Yet,
this is this wonderful Dennis ever goes in here with me? But you love
him anyhow, don't you very much? Why? He's sweet, he's charming
and and really he's only bashful when other people are around. When Dennis and
I are a lot, But don't tell me about it. He's a very
gentle boy. It's all that's daddy. Yes, I know here we are,
Daddy. What how did he get you in that street? Cecily was
my idea? Daddy, what's the matter get your shoes on, Honeywell,
and come with me. You want to try this, mister Ramsey, I
was just telling your daughter when I was an abbey. I heard what I
said, get your shoes on. Something's happened, mister Honeywell. You still
haven't told me. What's the matter, mister Ramsey in here in the library,
Oh you know, allow me to introduce myself. I'm mister Honeywell.
Oh no, you're not well the heck I'm not. I am Honeywell the
archaeologist. Oh no, you're not sure I am. You just asked mister
Ramsey here. Oh no, you're not two against one. Huh? All
right? Who am I? Who are you eliminate? Honeywell? I'm Honeywell.
I asked you a question. Who are you? Your chauffeur said I
was Honeywell. Your daughter said I was Honeywell. You said I was Honeywell.
Now I'm confused. My chauffer was supposed to pick up mister Honeywell in
front of that dude ranch yesterday. He picked you up, so we all
fought you were Honeywell. How dare this young man has so Honeywell? Yes,
how dare you assume mister Honeywell's identity. You assumed it for me,
Ramsey. Let's not turn blue over a mistake you made. I must say,
mister Ramsey, the whole thing is your Schoffer's fault, just because I
arrived at the Dud's ranch a few hours later. Yes, now you what's
your real name? Digby? Johnny Digby and your Honeywell, the dishonest archaeologist.
I won't be called dishonest. Your profession's robbing graves, isn't it?
Thirty old babes? Nobody wants them anyhow? All I can say is you
fellows that got yourselves in a vine here. You are gonna cheat Dennis out
of thirty thousand dollars. Boy mm hmm, stop at the kitchen and have
the cook picture a real chuck wagon lunch. Then blow a real big vine
and his fifty dollars for your trump. That all right with you, mister
Honeywell. I don't care if I never see you again, sir, But
think what would happen to your reputation if I went out and spread it around
among your buddies of the shovel You were party to a fraud that you verified
that last Thursday's pots were old in the relics. How about that? How
much the honeyway? Hi? Ready must call Hey, Now wait a minute,
this young man is perfectly right, and I listen, Honeyway. We
had a deal. Those pots in the closet were supposed to be your pots.
Dennis would take your word for us that they're authentic. Ten thousand dollars
apiece. You can't run out on me, nily, mister Ramsey, really
what really? I must go? Hello, mister Ramsey, Hello, mister
Honeywell, name is Digbie, Johnny Digby. A flat fee a thousand dollars?
Oh listen and now come here to the window. Plane overhead, get
away from the window. Dennis don't like anybody to watch it. Dennis,
don't huh? Where were you saying? Ramsey? A flat fee one thousand?
Last night? You offered me twenty percent of thirty thousand dollars I offered,
doctor Honeywell, who am I? How are you? Mister Honeywell?
Very well, thank you, I'm just fine. I'll take six thousand dollars.
Please a loud question. I write your check. Please do make it
out to John Digby. Hey you are boy Ramsey. Yes, you signed
Honeywell's name to the check I did. Sounds like Dennis's plane is coming in
for a landing, Ramsey. I'd hate to disillusion Dennis about his future father
in law. You better write me another check. But you're the biggest seat
from the state of New Mexican. You write the check, sign your name,
than call your chauffeur. I want to get to the bank and cash
this check before I say hello's to Dennis. As a matter of fact,
to the whole Southwest. Write the check, Ramsey put her there. I'm
so sorry I wasn't able to meet you at the plane, Dennis, but
I had to stop at the bank. Mister Honeywell. Oh yes, mister
honeywey oh yes, geez, you don't mention it. Oh I must your
last paper, the one on the Ptolemies of eg Yes, it had a
certain style in this the way you just looked at that sand dune in the
middle of the Sahara and then made an X on the sands and said dig
here. Oh that was the most everybody messed everybody else. Oh well,
from mister Ramsey. My intended father in law dad to be my boy when
he wrote that you would be here expressly to meet me. Oh well,
well, what didn't it? And when mister Ramsey, my intended father in
law yet to be, of course, when he told me that he was
interceding in my behalf and that the pots could be bought for only thirty thousand
dollars or Dad to be drives a hard bargain. Of course, you know
I would have paid twice that much, mister Honeywell, may I see you
for a minute before Well, if Dennis feels the old pots are under priced,
we don't wanna take advantage of for that's no, no, no,
no, no, my pleasure. I know they'll be in good hands.
We're gonna have a place in New York, and we've got a spot in
the living room for them. A niche cicely a nich Oh, Denny's been
keeping them from me. I haven't seen them yet. Well, Dennis,
I I guess now's as good a time as any. Hell, let's take
a look Ramsey right uh this way next door to the sun room, mister
Honeywell, and I need a display. Well, Dennis, my boy,
what do you think? Oh my, oh, Dennis, they're in love.
You feel that quality? Dennis? Oh my oh, wait on my
friends at Harvard Cedre. We keep them away from the hasty pudding boys.
And only thirty thousand dollars. I feel like a thief if you've forgotten your
check book. Boy. Oh no, I brought along a certified check for
thirty thousand dollars, of course, made out to mister Honeywell. Oh good,
here and thank you, thank you so much. You're white. Welcome,
Honeywell, what are you doing? Dennis? He drew up the check.
Oh, it was too good to be true. Dennis, will pay
you any price. These two kids have got to fiddle their niches. Honeywell,
Dennis, Yes, sir, will you go forty thousand? Yes,
sir Honeywell, forty thousand? Take it or leave it. Cecily, I
hate you, Oh I don't hate you. What do you want, Cecily?
I think you're one of the loveliest young ladies I've ever met. How
much do you want, mister Honeywell? Nothing? Oh no, I don't
understand you. I don't understand him either, cessor all the trouble he went
through digging out these perfect they're yours, a wedding present from me to you.
Oh, I can't accept them. Well, of course you can't.
I'm going to be your father or no, And I say you can't accept
them. It's it's impossible, Cecily, you're a very sweet man. I
want you to have them. Yeah, i'd like to kiss you. Mister
Honeywell, I wish you would. Oh, thank you, bless you both,
my children. This has been the most touching day of our lives,
hasn't it been? Dennis, mister Honeywell, yes, Dennis, you're a
very superior man. Is I was walking the streets a movie, you know,
Hey, how about a lift? Uh huh? Hop in? Yeah,
hey give me way ahead of Texas? Nice place, Texas. I
used to think so, but maybe I ain't gonna like it anymore. Got
a couple of hundred acres north Amilla. Used to be peaceful there, I
gonna be peaceful no more. Oh what's the matter? Wife called me this
morning in Albuquerque where I was selling some hogs. Wife says the hog drought
back in Texas is running oil. H Yeah, I know hogs, but
I don't know oil. I know oil. Who are you headed for?
Amarilla? Do tell? Hey? Uh y, you wouldn't consider I might
if the deal was right. Yes, cigarette. If you roll your own
only way, I smoke'em. Thank you. I like a man rolls
his own signed honesty. We ain't gonna have any troubles, none at all.
Dig The Thief, starring Kathy and Elliott Lewis in a moment, mister
and missus, Lewis won't tell you about that. Next week's play. Colleges
preoccupy two of our leading programs this weekend on CBS Radio, The Von Monroe
Show will originate in Boston College, with Vaughn and Company serving up the top
tunes of this week. To mark the occasion, Gangbusters approaches learning from another
tangent, bringing us its true crime case history, The College Caper. Also
Saturday night on most of these same stations, The Geneaufrey Show brings us its
Western drama called The Ruthless Rustler. And Tarzan Lord of the Jungle introduces us
to the dreaded Lionmen in an episode titled Tarzan and the Arena of Death.
And now once again Kathy and Elliott Lewis, what did you do when you
got to Texas? Well, maybe in about six months, I'll tell you
if Morton Fine and David Friedkin can be prevailed upon to continue the adventures of
dig the Thief tonight while in New Mexico, John Digby was shrewder than my
father, John McIntyre, my fiance Lee Millar, and the legitimate archaeologist Hal
Gerard. While the same mister Digby got fired earlier in the play by Ken
Christie because he shot up a town with the help of G. G.
Pearson, Byron Kine and Bob Sweeney, who was a writer a few weeks
ago. Next week, we're going to do a new adaptation of a story
you all know about, but if you're at all like Elliott and me,
don't remember very well. In its original form, it was written by Frank
Stockton, and it's called The Lady or the Tiger. We'll be with you
next week. Until then, thank you for listening, and good night,
good night. Music for Tonight's story was composed by Fred Steiner and conducted by
lud Gluskins. The Kathy and Elliott theme is by Ray Noble, and the
program is transcribed and directed by mister Lewis. George Wall Streakings, mm HM
and Remember for Music and Song joined bon Row Saturday nights on the CBS Radio Network