1 00:00:00,600 --> 00:00:17,719 Made destangeon O Pace Sunny Sun on I hadasion nat Hey, everybody, what's 2 00:00:17,800 --> 00:00:23,440 up? What's up? I'm your host, Lynnette Corolla. I'm Stephanie Wilder 3 00:00:23,519 --> 00:00:28,640 Taylor. Welcome to for crying Out another another episode. Yep, let's say 4 00:00:28,640 --> 00:00:33,119 on to our freaking stupid people. Oh boy, not Anna Ferris, by 5 00:00:33,159 --> 00:00:38,200 the way, I just watched a lost in translation again for still holds up. 6 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:41,679 In fact, I might have liked it better, but Anna Ferris is 7 00:00:41,719 --> 00:00:46,039 in that movie. I thought of our friend Anne Farrish. You've never seen 8 00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:50,880 Transition? Seen it? I gotta watch it? So good? Yeah, 9 00:00:50,960 --> 00:00:55,159 I think you'd really like it, Ashley, so she can share Bear and 10 00:00:55,479 --> 00:01:00,600 do you want to hurshy bar and Kelly Lady dah and am he's at Katie. 11 00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:06,879 Katie's rolling on. She's rolling on that e Aaron. Who does Nikki 12 00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:11,040 call your girls? Leslie? Which one is it? I know? Is 13 00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:15,120 the one that's coughing all day long? Or is it the one who's accosting 14 00:01:15,239 --> 00:01:19,359 people? Both of you guys should be arrested. Jacob is very growley but 15 00:01:19,599 --> 00:01:26,719 adorable. Rita rocks everybody's kids, all the fcol listeners kids in her basket 16 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:30,799 head yep. Elizabeth, including Elizabeth Williamson's and Athena ginshured. We love your 17 00:01:30,879 --> 00:01:37,599 dancing and your lipstick. You wear some badass red lipstick. Eh, Polly, 18 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:42,000 we love your pancake and your SISO. I can use some pancakes. 19 00:01:42,840 --> 00:01:47,840 Valerie Bubba Fenwick gets out of the park. And Katerina that's still with the 20 00:01:47,879 --> 00:01:49,760 bowler. I know it's gonna fall out of her head. I know. 21 00:01:51,280 --> 00:02:00,000 Gabby and Missy they're rolling on eye with Katie yep Ishan Voshpeg Rebecca Kelly Brandt 22 00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:02,799 is not your aunt, but she has a mento's for you. Yes, 23 00:02:02,920 --> 00:02:08,400 Alicia Leslie, Oh, we already did her. Sarah's the final Aaron during 24 00:02:08,479 --> 00:02:13,240 Sanchez, Oh, Jennifer, get up, Sandra, it's not easy being 25 00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:21,120 green. Christa. You make me want to SHOOTE think's going on? Uh? 26 00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:24,919 I'm just getting a talking about rolling on E. Yeah, talking about 27 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:30,840 rolling on E. I okay. I feel that you will be proud of 28 00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:34,520 me for this. I haven't. I haven't. It's not really an announcement. 29 00:02:34,719 --> 00:02:38,199 But so Sadie, as you know, has her driving permit. Yeah. 30 00:02:39,719 --> 00:02:44,800 I think that because of my memory issues, I think I've rewritten history 31 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:47,039 a little bit, and I like to think of myself as having driven with 32 00:02:47,240 --> 00:02:51,360 LB all the time when she was learning to drive. But then it occurred 33 00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:53,919 to me that I complained about it all the time on this show, right 34 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:59,560 because I constantly thought she was going to shave off of somebody's here in a 35 00:02:59,639 --> 00:03:05,280 park mirror. I had a lot of anxieties. But somehow, and maybe, 36 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:07,879 like I said, maybe I've rewritten history. And you guys, you 37 00:03:07,960 --> 00:03:10,319 and Kaitlin correct me if I'm wrong, But I did drive. I feel 38 00:03:10,319 --> 00:03:15,319 like I drove with her quite a bit. Though you did well with who 39 00:03:15,599 --> 00:03:20,240 with LB? Yes, And to be fair to you, you have anxiety 40 00:03:20,240 --> 00:03:23,159 when you're driving with John, Yes, I do. You're driving with anybody. 41 00:03:23,199 --> 00:03:27,280 I do, Okay, so I but I feel like I took LB 42 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:30,400 a lot at the beginning, and then I do think at some point I 43 00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:34,080 was like, okay, I'm out, like this is hard for me, 44 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:36,840 and and John was like, it's not hard for me, and I was 45 00:03:36,879 --> 00:03:38,800 like, then you do it right. And he's the he took LB on 46 00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:42,879 the freeway for the first time, you know, and then he would drive 47 00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:46,560 with her for long periods, like up the freeway and you know, I 48 00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:52,599 will grant him that John has told me that he drove with LB like ninety 49 00:03:52,639 --> 00:03:54,039 percent of the time, and I'm like, well, I have a lot 50 00:03:54,159 --> 00:03:58,280 of memories of driving with her, a lot at the beginning when she was 51 00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:03,039 first had her permit, because I remember a time early on where we were 52 00:04:03,159 --> 00:04:09,039 driving and she, okay, you know the valley we're driving and we end 53 00:04:09,120 --> 00:04:15,479 up at Resita and it's not a protected like there's no light, and Elbie 54 00:04:15,599 --> 00:04:16,959 was like, oh, hell no, I can't. I don't. Like 55 00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:20,480 she didn't want to make a right turn into traffic and she certainly wasn't going 56 00:04:20,519 --> 00:04:24,279 to make a left turn, and she didn't feel like she could turn around, 57 00:04:24,399 --> 00:04:27,160 so we had to. I remember her kind of freaking out and having 58 00:04:27,199 --> 00:04:29,439 to switch sides with her and being like, don't worry, I got you. 59 00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:32,279 And then, you know, I remember a lot of specific instances. 60 00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:38,360 Okay, so going into Sadie, Now, Elb is a great driver. 61 00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:43,519 Still won't drive with her, but she's I'm sure I've heard I've heard from 62 00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:51,959 her, right. So anyway, with Sadie, the anxiety kicked in, 63 00:04:53,120 --> 00:04:55,959 Like from the first time driving with her, I was like, oh god, 64 00:04:56,160 --> 00:05:00,720 like, and I feel so out of control when she's in the driver's 65 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:04,720 seat because like, and I always think like the driver's ed people they have 66 00:05:04,879 --> 00:05:09,160 a battle on their side, which god, I wish I had a break 67 00:05:09,240 --> 00:05:13,120 pedal, I know, like that'd be amazing. You can't, and I 68 00:05:13,319 --> 00:05:16,759 have to fight myself sometimes from reaching over and like helping, like going I 69 00:05:16,839 --> 00:05:20,920 think you're okay, I know, but I don't do that right because anybody's 70 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:24,120 like, well, there's the thing to do that. I mean, more 71 00:05:24,360 --> 00:05:28,680 nerve racking than driving with your team. But you did it and seem to 72 00:05:28,759 --> 00:05:30,759 do fine. You let me drive all the time. Yeah, but it 73 00:05:30,920 --> 00:05:35,079 well, she started it more with her dad and he was taken around. 74 00:05:35,160 --> 00:05:39,439 So by the time I got with her, it was she was a little 75 00:05:39,480 --> 00:05:44,240 more comfortable. Sunny is a little too cautious, so you know, I 76 00:05:44,920 --> 00:05:46,800 it still was nerve racking because I'm like, you're going a little too swell. 77 00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:50,360 These people are like piling up behind us, Like it's just nerve wracking, 78 00:05:50,519 --> 00:05:54,199 right, Yeah. I I didn't. I didn't like it at all. 79 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:57,240 I hated it. So I have to force myself to do it. 80 00:05:57,519 --> 00:06:02,560 M But the problem is that John doesn't it doesn't have as much anxiety about 81 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:06,040 it. But he's such a procrastinator that she'll say like, hey, can 82 00:06:06,120 --> 00:06:11,399 I go driving? And He'll be like absolutely, like can you wait a 83 00:06:11,439 --> 00:06:14,759 little while? And then a little while goes by. He's like this with 84 00:06:14,839 --> 00:06:16,439 a lot of things, you know, going to the gym, right Like 85 00:06:16,839 --> 00:06:18,920 when I decide it's time to go to the gym, I'm going to the 86 00:06:18,959 --> 00:06:20,959 gym. Like I'm like, I'm ready to go to the gym. I've 87 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:24,759 I've just got the thought in my head, I've got a free hour, 88 00:06:24,959 --> 00:06:27,519 like I'm going by. You know, if you leave it to John, 89 00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:29,879 he'll be like, you know what if you wait, like I'll go to 90 00:06:29,959 --> 00:06:31,240 the gym with you, And I'm like, no, you won't. If 91 00:06:31,319 --> 00:06:33,879 I wait, then the next thing, then you'll be like, oh, 92 00:06:34,040 --> 00:06:36,199 now we're getting into the busy time at the gym. You know what we 93 00:06:36,199 --> 00:06:39,399 should do. We should go after dinner. And I'm like, no, 94 00:06:39,519 --> 00:06:43,160 I ain't nobody going to the gym after dinner, right, are you high? 95 00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:47,120 Like yeah, but that's not happening. Yeah, And John forgets any 96 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:50,279 kind of history, like he like, I will have to say to him, 97 00:06:50,720 --> 00:06:55,519 John, you almost never in his mind. He'll be like I go 98 00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:57,680 to the gym like twice a week. I'm like, you go to the 99 00:06:57,720 --> 00:07:00,399 gym once a month if that. But you know, it's like a thing 100 00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:04,560 where I think he really believes his own hype. Like he's like, no, 101 00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:08,240 I'm like going to the gym, Like look at me going. I'm 102 00:07:08,279 --> 00:07:11,319 like, you went once, and then you you do a lot of talking 103 00:07:11,399 --> 00:07:15,639 about going to the gym. So anyway, Sadie was like not driving and 104 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:19,120 not driving and not driving because she would ask John and he'd be like, 105 00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:21,920 I'm absolutely gonna take you. And then then he'd be like, you know 106 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:26,240 what, you know we should do tomorrow morning? I should take you. 107 00:07:26,319 --> 00:07:29,600 Yeah, we're getting into traffic or they're starting to be a glare, you 108 00:07:29,680 --> 00:07:32,519 know, so let's go. Let's make a plan to go tomorrow morning. 109 00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:35,959 And she'd be like uh huh. And then the next day would come and 110 00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:38,959 I'd be like, hey, I thought you were driving with d And she's 111 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:43,079 like, I thought so too, But you know, and she doesn't those 112 00:07:43,160 --> 00:07:46,240 two are really close, so she doesn't want to throw him under the bus. 113 00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:47,800 I will. I'll be like, what the hell, John, I 114 00:07:47,839 --> 00:07:50,959 thought you were driving with Sata. To day He's like I am, We're 115 00:07:51,079 --> 00:07:56,639 just waiting a few hours. And then I glare, glare, yeah, 116 00:07:56,639 --> 00:07:58,319 and then it's like, oh, we don't want I don't want to drive 117 00:07:58,360 --> 00:08:01,240 with her in the dark, So I wait till first thing tomorrow morning. 118 00:08:01,279 --> 00:08:05,079 I'm like, oh my god. So meanwhile, Sadie goes on a has 119 00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:09,439 an official lesson, and her last one her last official lesson, So they 120 00:08:09,519 --> 00:08:13,519 have three. They have to at a minimum have three two hour lessons, 121 00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:16,839 right, but the two hour lessons are two hundred bucks a pot us. 122 00:08:18,240 --> 00:08:22,680 So like, you don't want to farm it out completely to them give your 123 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:26,920 kid all their training hours because you will go broke that way. So you 124 00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:30,600 have to beef it up with your own hours. And they will tell you 125 00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:33,600 when they bring your kid home, here's their strengths and here's their weaknesses. 126 00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:39,320 And oh my god, I forgot I actually this is kind of funny. 127 00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:43,879 I forgot to tell you this. So basically, almost every driving lesson she's 128 00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:48,360 had, the instructor has been like, she needs like practice. You should 129 00:08:48,399 --> 00:08:52,000 be taking her out like every day for like like twenty minutes so that she 130 00:08:52,159 --> 00:08:56,799 can really get comfortable, you know, because yeah, duh, you don't 131 00:08:56,799 --> 00:08:58,639 want to go a month between she hasn't been out on the road. Then 132 00:08:58,639 --> 00:09:01,919 suddenly she's having a lesson. These poor instructors are like, you know, 133 00:09:05,200 --> 00:09:11,960 you know, she's actually exactly and I'm here, I'm like, better you 134 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:16,120 than me. You got the brake pedal, You got the brake pedals, 135 00:09:16,919 --> 00:09:20,759 you do it. Yeah, But the last lesson she went on hot on. 136 00:09:22,559 --> 00:09:26,320 The instructor comes back and she's got a smile on her face and she's 137 00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:30,039 like, yeah, Sadie did fine. She did, She did fine. 138 00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:35,240 There were a couple of moments. Uh, she took a corner where her 139 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:39,039 right hand cornering hit the curb a little bit. She needs to be you 140 00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:43,919 know, careful there, and like basically she needs practice. She just she 141 00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:46,639 just needs to practice. But like, I think she's got good spatial awareness, 142 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:52,000 like she said a lot of nice things. She leaves, Sadie starts 143 00:09:52,039 --> 00:09:58,000 crying. I'm like, oh no, what happened? And she's like apparently, 144 00:09:58,320 --> 00:10:01,720 And I do not underst stand the whole extent of this, but she 145 00:10:03,240 --> 00:10:09,759 says that she was trying to avoid a parked car and she went too far 146 00:10:09,919 --> 00:10:16,399 to the left probably and hit a car's mirror. Oh driving, but the 147 00:10:16,679 --> 00:10:20,279 but these I've done there plenty of times. Really, But like a car 148 00:10:20,399 --> 00:10:24,559 that was moving my younger days. Oh, the car was moving, The 149 00:10:24,639 --> 00:10:28,440 car was moving. The other car that she hit, yes, yes, 150 00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:33,720 So I don't really understand. I really don't understand the situation because I'm like, 151 00:10:33,799 --> 00:10:35,879 if you got into a move, if you got into an accident. 152 00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:41,519 She's like, she goes, well, the other car didn't stop and but 153 00:10:41,679 --> 00:10:45,559 it but it pulled our mirror back. She so, I was like, 154 00:10:45,639 --> 00:10:50,360 so did you hit it really really slightly, because if you made contact with 155 00:10:50,440 --> 00:10:54,759 another moving car, I would imagine that's an accident. So I don't understand 156 00:10:54,799 --> 00:10:58,639 the full story. All I know is that she had to pull over. 157 00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:03,120 The instructor had her pull over stop and looked at the mirror and determined there 158 00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:07,279 was no damage, like it was just but it freaked completely freak drivers. 159 00:11:09,279 --> 00:11:13,519 But I will tell you this, kudos to the instructor because that did not 160 00:11:13,720 --> 00:11:16,360 end the lesson. The instructor was like, oh, we are going to 161 00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:20,399 keep going, and they went on the freeway, so she obviously had confidence 162 00:11:20,919 --> 00:11:24,679 on their third lesson, they go on the freeway, right, So so, 163 00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:28,320 but Sadie was still shaken up, and I was like, well, 164 00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:35,399 the answer to that is that we start practicing like a lot. I was 165 00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:37,840 like, you can't let that. Yeah, you gotta because you're going to 166 00:11:37,919 --> 00:11:41,919 be you need a lot of reps. So they made a commitment that we 167 00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:43,799 she was going to drive like every day. So of course I was like, 168 00:11:43,919 --> 00:11:52,519 John, you gotta drive with every I was like, if it truly 169 00:11:52,639 --> 00:11:54,960 doesn't make you anxious, because I do want to ship my pants every time 170 00:11:56,000 --> 00:12:00,200 I'm driving with her. I am if the driving instructor has to have shit 171 00:12:00,279 --> 00:12:03,960 running down her like once, that's me every time. Like I can't take 172 00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:09,240 that many showers, you know, every day I got a shower. So 173 00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:11,879 but here's where you're gonna be proud of me. Yeah, I drove with 174 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:16,039 her the other day. I was like, you know what, I cannot 175 00:12:16,039 --> 00:12:20,960 let this kind of anxiety rule my life. And poor kid, like she 176 00:12:22,080 --> 00:12:24,639 needs to drive, and she is a decent driver. She's not a bad 177 00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:31,120 driver. She just literally needs practice and she's if anything, she's probably more 178 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:35,639 like Sunny. She's very careful, careful. So the other day I took 179 00:12:35,679 --> 00:12:39,039 her out and I drove with her for an hour and it felt like going 180 00:12:39,080 --> 00:12:41,759 to the gym, you know, Like I was like, we're going to 181 00:12:41,840 --> 00:12:45,919 drive for an hour. I want you to get practice. Then I was 182 00:12:45,960 --> 00:12:48,480 like looking at the clock, I'm like, oh, God, has it 183 00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:50,720 been. And then just when I would think like can we turn around and 184 00:12:50,759 --> 00:12:54,559 go, I'd be like no, no, no, keep going going, 185 00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:58,039 You're going to go this way. We practice that backing up that they have 186 00:12:58,159 --> 00:13:01,600 to do where they're not allowed to look at the mirror at the camera. 187 00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:03,639 They have to like turn their head, you know how they have to do 188 00:13:03,759 --> 00:13:07,799 the backing up parallel to the curve and they can't hit the curb or it's 189 00:13:07,799 --> 00:13:11,200 an automatic fail. We did that a bunch of times. She did not 190 00:13:11,320 --> 00:13:16,720 hit the curb. She's like good at it. But where I just get 191 00:13:16,919 --> 00:13:22,879 so stressed out is like, first of all, the car that we're driving, 192 00:13:22,279 --> 00:13:28,200 our pres and we're buying the car, like so it's still a lease 193 00:13:28,279 --> 00:13:33,159 at this point, but it's out of the it's just left the lease window 194 00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:37,519 and we're going to just buy it out right, but we haven't quite done 195 00:13:37,559 --> 00:13:43,080 it yet, but like that's our car. Yeah, so if we get 196 00:13:43,159 --> 00:13:46,600 into an accident, like we pay the deductible and it goes then it goes 197 00:13:46,639 --> 00:13:50,399 on your insurance. Like it's not it's not nothing. If you get into 198 00:13:50,440 --> 00:13:54,440 an accident right now, I know, it goes on your driving record and 199 00:13:54,639 --> 00:13:58,559 then you have to put it at the body shop for six weeks, you 200 00:13:58,639 --> 00:14:03,279 know. I mean because when Elbe got in her little she I don't know 201 00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,559 if you remember this. It was a couple of years ago. She hit 202 00:14:05,679 --> 00:14:09,679 somebody going onto an entrance ramp on the front light and she claims that the 203 00:14:09,759 --> 00:14:13,879 car stopped short in front of her. You know, I don't know. 204 00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:16,519 She was a very new driver. But that ended up and then the guy 205 00:14:16,720 --> 00:14:20,279 was like, we're not going to go through insurance. But then he did 206 00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:24,360 call his insurance company and then it was like a whole thing it for We 207 00:14:24,559 --> 00:14:28,720 had to replace the hood of the car. I mean, it was in 208 00:14:28,799 --> 00:14:31,440 the shop for a long time ever. We had rental cars, and it's 209 00:14:31,559 --> 00:14:37,960 like it all goes through my head when I'm like one false move with a 210 00:14:37,039 --> 00:14:43,360 new driver, right, and like you're you're so it's like I tried it. 211 00:14:43,639 --> 00:14:48,399 I try to just like but to meditate, you know, I try 212 00:14:48,440 --> 00:14:52,080 to just go like okay, like everybody has to learn how to drive, 213 00:14:52,519 --> 00:14:58,440 like she has a permit, and then I want to get one of those 214 00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:01,399 big student driver in a car you're not in an order, one of those 215 00:15:01,519 --> 00:15:05,240 I just passed it. I land on a long walk last night and I 216 00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:07,399 saw it. I was just like, that's a nice car for a student 217 00:15:07,519 --> 00:15:11,240 driver. I was like, I don't know, some jeep Cherokee thing, 218 00:15:11,679 --> 00:15:13,559 but yeah, yeah, it's a it's a magnet like a bumper stick, 219 00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:16,679 but you just put a magnet on there. I do just want people to 220 00:15:16,879 --> 00:15:22,639 understand because she got honked at for stuff that was not her fault. And 221 00:15:22,799 --> 00:15:26,320 this is the thing. When you're with your kid and they are trying to 222 00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:30,279 make an unprotected the thing they have to practice the most. There's two things 223 00:15:30,559 --> 00:15:35,320 in my experience kids that it takes a while to get. Is the unprotected 224 00:15:35,399 --> 00:15:39,600 left turn. Yes, so you're waiting for the light to turn yellow. 225 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:43,000 I'm like, okay, Sadie, when the when you're trying to make a 226 00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:45,639 left turn and you're waiting for the light to turn yellow, what is the 227 00:15:45,759 --> 00:15:48,600 most important thing? And she's like, have your blinker on. I'm like, 228 00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:52,639 that's important, not the most important, more important than that, and 229 00:15:52,720 --> 00:15:58,759 she's like, uh uh, I don't know. I'm like, okay, 230 00:15:58,039 --> 00:16:02,519 it's that when the light turns yellow, you can't just go. You got 231 00:16:02,679 --> 00:16:04,559 to make sure the cars that are coming are stopping, and that they're not 232 00:16:04,679 --> 00:16:07,679 going to try to gun it and speed up and go through the yellow light 233 00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:12,080 right because guess who got into a bad accident that way. Me. Yeah, 234 00:16:12,279 --> 00:16:17,879 when I was sixteen, I totaled a car going through it taking my 235 00:16:18,039 --> 00:16:21,639 left on yellow right. Because the cars are going to I think cars are 236 00:16:21,679 --> 00:16:23,879 going to stop. You gotta wait, I said, even if you have 237 00:16:25,080 --> 00:16:29,159 to wait, if you're not sure what they're doing, wait till the light 238 00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:32,919 turns red. I don't care if cars honk at you. Obviously you don't 239 00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:36,879 want to hesitate so long that the light's been red now and cars are starting 240 00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:40,279 to go the other direction, of course not, but like, yeah, 241 00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:44,639 if it's a long yellow light and and cars are coming and you don't know 242 00:16:44,679 --> 00:16:48,360 what they're gonna do, please wait. Yes, So that's I needed that. 243 00:16:48,759 --> 00:16:52,799 If you were in the left turn and we were talking, but he 244 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:55,600 was like he was a little nervous that we were waiting for the light to 245 00:16:55,679 --> 00:16:59,320 turn yellow because there was a loud traffic. And then the light turned red 246 00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:03,960 and he's still sat for a beat. I go like, go the lights 247 00:17:04,079 --> 00:17:08,039 red, now we're fuck And he's like, oh shit, Like you've got 248 00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:11,200 to pay attention to the light too. You can't just sit there. It's 249 00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:15,640 all like a fast thing though, And like we don't realize when you've been 250 00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:19,680 driving for a while, it's it's almost in your body right, You're you 251 00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:23,319 know what to do and you feel it's all like a feeling it. And 252 00:17:23,440 --> 00:17:29,839 I tried to have empathy for being brand new and every and also hot on. 253 00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:34,920 Sadie takes a little bit longer, like I do think alb he's got 254 00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:40,119 anxiety. Sadie's got a little bit of like things take her a little longer 255 00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:44,160 to process. Xander is going to be the best driver. He's just he's 256 00:17:44,240 --> 00:17:47,000 got none of that. He doesn't have the anxiety, and he doesn't he's 257 00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:49,240 going to make decisions better. He's the one who's the most scared to drive. 258 00:17:49,319 --> 00:17:52,759 He still doesn't have his permit. Oh he'll be fine. Sadie's braver 259 00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:57,160 than Xander. Okay, but takes a little bit longer to make decisions. 260 00:17:57,519 --> 00:18:00,880 So with Sadie, I have to be like, Okay, you just got 261 00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:03,920 to make you gotta do this. You got to gauge this. You watch 262 00:18:04,039 --> 00:18:07,480 the cars. If there aren't a lot of cars, if there's like one 263 00:18:07,599 --> 00:18:12,200 car coming and you really see them slowing down when the light turns yellow. 264 00:18:12,880 --> 00:18:17,599 Then pretty much before the light turns rid, you can make that turn if 265 00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:22,720 you have any question in your mind. Wait Also, you never know, 266 00:18:22,880 --> 00:18:25,960 like sometimes cars look like they're going to stop, but then they change their 267 00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:29,000 mind and they then they try and go. I know, it's scary. 268 00:18:29,160 --> 00:18:32,680 I hate it when when the light turns yellow and just cars keep coming and 269 00:18:32,759 --> 00:18:34,799 coming. In Now, I'm like, if that's the case, let them 270 00:18:34,799 --> 00:18:40,680 be assholes, let them run the and you just wait and if carshunked behind 271 00:18:40,759 --> 00:18:45,680 you, fuck up, I'm like, better safe than sorry, Like you 272 00:18:45,799 --> 00:18:49,400 know. So a couple of times a car honked behind her and I was 273 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:52,640 like, that's okay, it's not you, that's on them, Like you 274 00:18:52,920 --> 00:18:56,319 just have to be like it's fine, that's fine, that's fine, tune 275 00:18:56,359 --> 00:19:00,640 it out. But anyway, I drove with her for and hour through those 276 00:19:00,799 --> 00:19:07,240 situations. That's great. Practically had like fourteen heart attacks, but I was 277 00:19:07,319 --> 00:19:10,519 like, I did it, and then I felt like I felt so proud 278 00:19:10,559 --> 00:19:14,640 of myself. Right, she felt proud of herself. I felt more proud 279 00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:17,880 of myself. I was like, I was like, we have for an 280 00:19:18,119 --> 00:19:21,680 hour than the next day John's like, hold my beer, took her out 281 00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:25,640 for an hour and a half. So, hey, she had a lot 282 00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:29,119 of driving part did Yeah? Did she go on the freeway? She's on 283 00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:32,359 the freeway with John, Okay, not with me? Okay, No, 284 00:19:32,559 --> 00:19:34,839 I'm not that brave, right right, Like I have the thing. Yeah, 285 00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:38,039 she needs as much practice as she can get because then she'll start to 286 00:19:38,079 --> 00:19:41,480 get comfored is she feeling more comfortable? I think that that's what it is. 287 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:45,480 It's like I told her the same thing. I said, it's reps, 288 00:19:45,759 --> 00:19:49,039 Like I go, the more you try to make left turns, the 289 00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:52,240 better you're going to be at it. Yeah. And also, like another 290 00:19:52,359 --> 00:19:56,759 thing that we forget that kids have to learn how to do is park the 291 00:19:56,839 --> 00:20:02,279 car. Yes, Like you can't be out driving not feel secure about parking. 292 00:20:02,839 --> 00:20:04,680 So like I made her park a bunch of times at the street. 293 00:20:04,759 --> 00:20:08,200 Yeah I did that. Like parking in parking spaces, like in a parking 294 00:20:08,279 --> 00:20:12,319 lot. Trader Joe's parking lots are always the worst, and you should take 295 00:20:12,359 --> 00:20:15,640 them there. You have to have your license for like two years right before 296 00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:19,680 you park down the street. Yeah, you're braver than I am. If 297 00:20:19,720 --> 00:20:23,839 you're if you're practicing at Trader Joe's because it's up the street. I know 298 00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:29,519 that's gonna go there, and you know, and the spots are little and 299 00:20:29,960 --> 00:20:33,519 she got you. People are assholes and it's hard for me. I hate 300 00:20:33,559 --> 00:20:37,960 it, like you just maneuvering in and out and it's like, oh, 301 00:20:37,039 --> 00:20:41,279 here you come in my way. Like I had it free and clear until 302 00:20:41,359 --> 00:20:42,920 now you showed up right behind me. What do you want me to do 303 00:20:44,039 --> 00:20:45,720 with you now? Like? Now move? You know it's it's it's a 304 00:20:45,839 --> 00:20:51,200 dance and it's it can be stressful. So I always tell Sadie two, 305 00:20:52,160 --> 00:20:55,799 you know what, actually, let's take a quick break. Oh let's talk 306 00:20:55,839 --> 00:21:00,319 about Honey Love Love. Honeyloves. So I just want to see I just 307 00:21:00,359 --> 00:21:03,480 want to put this out there. Normally, I don't like shape wear. 308 00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:07,319 I don't like it. I don't like the way it feels. I don't 309 00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:10,559 like the fact that like it's always like rolling down and I got to pull 310 00:21:10,599 --> 00:21:11,960 it back up. I don't there's a lot of things I don't, but 311 00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:17,920 Honey Love has changed my opinion. Yes, And I was looking for a 312 00:21:18,119 --> 00:21:22,200 bra before they were our sponsors. I was looking for a bra that didn't 313 00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:26,960 have a wire that I could wear and that didn't like it smoothed the sides 314 00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:30,640 yea the back and I bought it. It was Honeylove and then they came 315 00:21:30,680 --> 00:21:33,359 on as our sponsor. It's true, It's true. I love that bra 316 00:21:33,599 --> 00:21:40,079 too, but I love the Superpower short uh huh, because like I got 317 00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:44,839 a lot going on in the underneath, yeah, in the back area yeah, 318 00:21:44,880 --> 00:21:48,559 and the live side of the thigh area. And sometimes you want to 319 00:21:48,559 --> 00:21:52,720 wear something like a jump suit or right or something a little tighter and you 320 00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:56,480 want to have that control. Yes, And the Steria Power short. It 321 00:21:56,880 --> 00:22:02,799 smooths out the stomach, the Thyes, it's got the perfect amount of compression 322 00:22:03,279 --> 00:22:08,119 and it's comfortable exactly. Yep. So treat yourself to the best brazen shape 323 00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:12,960 we're on the market and save twenty percent off at Honeylove dot com slash f 324 00:22:14,079 --> 00:22:18,599 col Use our exclusive link to get twenty percent off Honeylove dot com slash f 325 00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:22,200 Cool. After you purchase, they're going to ask where you heard about them. 326 00:22:22,359 --> 00:22:26,759 Please support our show and tell them we sent you. Treat yourself to 327 00:22:26,839 --> 00:22:33,160 Honeylove because you deserve it. That's right, Okay, So I forgot what 328 00:22:33,200 --> 00:22:36,400 I was gonna say about It was like I was gonna wrap it up with 329 00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:44,119 Sadie. I'm telling you, So she's is she feeling a little she's feeling 330 00:22:44,119 --> 00:22:47,000 a little better. When does she go to get her tests? Well, 331 00:22:47,119 --> 00:22:48,920 so she was. She was just asking. She was like, I want 332 00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:52,519 to schedule my test, and I said, I think you need. They're 333 00:22:52,559 --> 00:22:56,559 supposed to have at least thirty hours of driving time with their parent. With 334 00:22:56,640 --> 00:23:00,279 the parents, right, I think she needs. Listen, driving instructor who 335 00:23:00,319 --> 00:23:04,839 brought her home the other day where she was like, she did something. 336 00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:08,799 I think when she hit the corner. She was like, she did more 337 00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:14,400 than one thing that was an automatic fail on the test. So she needs 338 00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:18,559 more practice. But I'm like, listen, you just practice, practice, 339 00:23:18,599 --> 00:23:22,160 practice. It doesn't met like I don't. I said, I'm gonna be 340 00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:25,920 honest, I don't feel comfortable with you driving by yourself yet, license or 341 00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:29,480 no license, right, So like, let's just practice at least for another 342 00:23:29,559 --> 00:23:33,440 couple of weeks, going every day, and then we'll schedule the test. 343 00:23:33,559 --> 00:23:36,559 That you don't have to schedule it six months in advance, you can schedule 344 00:23:36,599 --> 00:23:38,039 it a week in it. Yeah, that's true. And you know that 345 00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:42,599 there's the DMVs. There's certain DMVs that that are like better than others. 346 00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:45,519 Right, we want to go to Wanca, you want to go to Aneka? 347 00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:49,960 Our leader, I'll be passed it Van Eyes, So did Sunny. 348 00:23:51,200 --> 00:23:53,279 Okay, I went to Van Eyes, but they say Waneca is like the 349 00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:59,119 best one. Okay, yeah, yeah yeah, but it is what it 350 00:23:59,279 --> 00:24:02,160 is, you know, And that's just the practice. Now. I drive 351 00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:06,480 with Italian. I've been going places together and I let her drive because she 352 00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:11,000 likes to drive. And I'm like, she's like, mom, I feel 353 00:24:11,079 --> 00:24:15,720 so comfortable driving like it's nothing because I'm like, you're gonna drive where that's 354 00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:18,599 far and she's like, mom, like I'm fine. So we've been driving 355 00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:25,839 like just around town, you know, and she's like I feel totally comfortable 356 00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:29,960 with her. Like she's fine. She doesn't scare me. Sunny is I 357 00:24:30,119 --> 00:24:33,680 try. I drive with him too. He's a little more cautious, but 358 00:24:34,079 --> 00:24:37,640 that's fine with me. You know. There's a Natalia could be a little 359 00:24:37,799 --> 00:24:41,160 heavy on the pedal and I'm like, you realize you're going like you're going 360 00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:45,119 ten miles over the steep. She's like oh, She's like I can't eat. 361 00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:47,680 I don't even really. I'm like, I know that's like your mom. 362 00:24:48,079 --> 00:24:51,599 I've gotten a lot of speeding tickets where you don't realize how fast you're 363 00:24:51,599 --> 00:24:53,720 going, but you gotta. Like so now that I'm with her, I 364 00:24:53,880 --> 00:24:57,119 have to call it out to her, like you're going away above the speedler 365 00:24:57,160 --> 00:25:00,559 and she's like oops, Like she doesn't even I realize it because she's just 366 00:25:00,759 --> 00:25:03,920 in the zone, you know, and just on the freeway going It's like 367 00:25:04,279 --> 00:25:10,759 it's easy to do. So it takes practice too on city streets to mind 368 00:25:11,319 --> 00:25:15,880 your speed because you know you will fail the driving test. Like so, 369 00:25:15,960 --> 00:25:19,599 if the speed limits thirty five, yes you can't go below thirty, but 370 00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:23,279 you can't go above the speed limit right, right, like if you're going 371 00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:26,960 because Sadie was going forty at one point and I was like, well, 372 00:25:26,079 --> 00:25:30,799 you're going to fail. Yeah, you have to stay at the speed limit 373 00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:34,119 or it's a speed limit, right if you're on a driving test, I 374 00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:37,119 don't think you can exceed the speed limit. But you also can't go way 375 00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:41,599 below this. You can't go like more than five miles below it either. 376 00:25:41,680 --> 00:25:45,480 I'm sure if you go a mile ahead, it's they're not gonna Yeah, 377 00:25:45,759 --> 00:25:48,480 I'm sure if you go thirty six or even thirty seven, you're not gonna 378 00:25:48,480 --> 00:25:52,160 get and then you slow back down. You're not gonna fail, but you 379 00:25:52,319 --> 00:25:56,160 definitely can't be driving at like twenty eight right right, Yeah, yeah, 380 00:25:56,799 --> 00:26:03,359 glad those days are over. I feel bad for you. And then you 381 00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:07,079 had Xander too, Like Xander, I have a feeling I'm going to feel 382 00:26:07,079 --> 00:26:10,599 more comfortable with that. But like, yeah, who told me to have 383 00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:14,240 three kids? Like you got to do it three times over? Yeah? 384 00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:18,640 And also like I remember when, uh so, when I found out I 385 00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:22,960 was pregnant with twins, I had this thing in my head where, first 386 00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:25,759 of all, I did not think I should have three kids. I definitely 387 00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:27,480 was like, oh, this is not for me. You know you I 388 00:26:27,599 --> 00:26:30,240 told you that. I was very honest, Yeah, I told I was 389 00:26:30,319 --> 00:26:36,519 really scared. I told John. I thought briefly about like, you know, 390 00:26:36,839 --> 00:26:40,000 oh, something happens to one of like if it gets absorbed, like 391 00:26:40,119 --> 00:26:42,559 it won't be the worst thing that happened, you know. And uh and 392 00:26:44,319 --> 00:26:47,319 I even had like I'm just gonna be I'm gonna be totally honest. I 393 00:26:47,440 --> 00:26:51,599 had a moment where I was like maybe we could like really early in the 394 00:26:51,640 --> 00:26:55,160 pregnancy, because I found out very early. I was like maybe we could 395 00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:59,200 like reduce. Well, this happened at the genetic testing. I was freaking 396 00:26:59,279 --> 00:27:02,599 out. Yeah, I think I told you this story. This is does 397 00:27:02,680 --> 00:27:04,519 not make me look good. No, we talked about this because I had 398 00:27:04,799 --> 00:27:10,000 I had triplets too, right, which is different, right, I only 399 00:27:10,119 --> 00:27:14,279 had the I only knew I had twins until I had the CVS test. 400 00:27:14,799 --> 00:27:18,200 Then they told me I'd been pregnant with triplets, but one of them had 401 00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:22,880 already were pregnant with triplets. So so I know I've told this story probably 402 00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:27,759 many times. But I found out I was pregnant. I knew I felt 403 00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:33,240 like off right, and we had tried. So I took a pregnancy test 404 00:27:33,359 --> 00:27:37,839 and it was I was pregnant. Then I went to the doctor and he 405 00:27:38,119 --> 00:27:42,519 was like, I don't it's uh, they couldn't find a sack. And 406 00:27:42,680 --> 00:27:48,799 then he did a blood test. Then my numbers like tripled went high. 407 00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:52,920 And then he this doctor was like, yeah, could be a topic pregnancy. 408 00:27:52,559 --> 00:27:55,720 Oh, he told me it was. He didn't think it was viable. 409 00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:57,359 He was like, I gave it like a fifty percent chance. And 410 00:27:57,480 --> 00:28:03,319 I was really pissed because you know, I don't know if I don't know 411 00:28:03,359 --> 00:28:06,359 if you were like this, but I knew I was pregnant, like I 412 00:28:06,559 --> 00:28:12,000 felt all the crazy hormonal like it's like a it's like feeling. Yeah, 413 00:28:12,039 --> 00:28:15,559 it just felt like I was on something. I felt paranoid and crazy, 414 00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:18,880 and I was like, no, this is this is pregnancy. Anyway, 415 00:28:19,519 --> 00:28:23,759 I end up going to the doctor at seven weeks, got a different gynecologist 416 00:28:25,119 --> 00:28:27,680 because I didn't like that doctor. And then she was like, oh, 417 00:28:27,759 --> 00:28:32,839 yeah, yeah, you're fine. Here's the sack you have. You're pregnant. 418 00:28:32,920 --> 00:28:37,200 There's the heartbeat. I saw the heartbeat at seven weeks. A week 419 00:28:37,359 --> 00:28:41,799 later, I had like a massive bleed and I was like, oh my 420 00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:47,400 god, I miss I miscarried. Called the called like Paige the doctor. 421 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:51,680 It was a Memorial Day. Yeah, it was a Memorial Day weekend. 422 00:28:52,119 --> 00:28:55,079 It's like on Monday. And so I paged the doctor and they're like, 423 00:28:55,240 --> 00:28:57,359 well you need to if you're still bleeding, you need to go to the 424 00:28:57,640 --> 00:29:02,359 er. Went to the er, even though I was like, this is 425 00:29:02,400 --> 00:29:08,799 a foregone conclusion. I definitely lost the baby. Then on call ultrasound person 426 00:29:08,920 --> 00:29:14,200 comes in, does an ultrasound and the guy's like, oh no, there's 427 00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:17,920 the heartbeat. Your baby's fine, and your other baby's fine too. That's 428 00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:21,519 how I found out I was having twins. So now I'm freaking out. 429 00:29:22,519 --> 00:29:26,480 Wow, so stressed out, and both of them seem to be doing fine, 430 00:29:26,880 --> 00:29:29,400 you know. So then I decided I was going to get a CVS 431 00:29:29,559 --> 00:29:33,240 test early on because I was like, I already have a kid. I 432 00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:36,279 want to know what's going on with this pregnancy early. I don't want to 433 00:29:36,319 --> 00:29:40,440 wait till like twenty weeks and have an ultrasound and find out something's really wrong. 434 00:29:41,039 --> 00:29:45,079 So go have the CVS test. They do the genetic counseling first, 435 00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:48,279 to go sit in a room and they tell you all the things that could 436 00:29:48,319 --> 00:29:52,599 be wrong, and I'm like upset, not at that, the same but 437 00:29:52,799 --> 00:29:56,200 not at that. But I'm not upset at that. And they're like, 438 00:29:56,440 --> 00:29:59,839 oh, yeah, this can be really like hard for people to hear. 439 00:30:00,039 --> 00:30:02,240 I was like, it's not that. She was like, oh, well, 440 00:30:02,279 --> 00:30:03,400 what's wrong? And I was like, I just don't want to have 441 00:30:03,559 --> 00:30:07,559 twins. I'm really scared. I can't afford it, Like this is too 442 00:30:07,720 --> 00:30:11,880 much. You know, we only live in a three bedroom house. And 443 00:30:11,519 --> 00:30:15,079 she's like well, she's like, well, you know there's options, like 444 00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:18,559 you don't have to have twins. And then she gives me a card for 445 00:30:18,759 --> 00:30:23,640 like selective reduction, right, so I keep that in my brain. But 446 00:30:25,599 --> 00:30:30,599 then I go and have the CVS test and then they tell me while I'm 447 00:30:30,680 --> 00:30:34,640 on the table, they're like, oh, there's another sack here, but 448 00:30:34,720 --> 00:30:38,599 it's empty. No. Yeah, and they said, did you have like 449 00:30:38,680 --> 00:30:41,920 an issue recently? And I was like, yeah, like a couple of 450 00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:45,400 weeks ago, I had a bleed. And they're like, yeah, you 451 00:30:45,519 --> 00:30:48,599 miscarried a triplet. You were pregnant with triplets. Wow, one of them. 452 00:30:48,960 --> 00:30:52,799 I did know this, but I forgot one of them would have been 453 00:30:52,319 --> 00:30:57,160 I think an identical. But now I can't remember which one right, right, 454 00:30:59,160 --> 00:31:03,240 I'm thinking, don't I don't know which one. But anyway, so 455 00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:06,839 that was like crazy. So then I was like, oh my god, 456 00:31:07,079 --> 00:31:10,599 like the news keeps getting worse, Like I was almost going to have triplets 457 00:31:10,839 --> 00:31:14,319 right anyway. Then I brought it up to John that like that they had 458 00:31:14,359 --> 00:31:15,440 given me this card, and he was like, oh, hell no, 459 00:31:15,640 --> 00:31:21,440 we're not doing that, and I was like okay, and then I adjusted 460 00:31:21,680 --> 00:31:25,680 yes to the idea. See, I was the other way around because we 461 00:31:25,839 --> 00:31:29,400 did IVF right, and I knew he was putting the three embryos in and 462 00:31:29,519 --> 00:31:32,279 then but then he was telling me, like, your chances of this is, 463 00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:34,480 you know, less than forty percent, and the embryo B is less 464 00:31:34,519 --> 00:31:38,599 than twenty percent. So you put all three in. And then they called 465 00:31:38,640 --> 00:31:42,759 two weeks later and they go, congratulations, you're very pregnant, she said, 466 00:31:44,279 --> 00:31:45,839 and I go, what does that mean? She goes, it means 467 00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:51,319 there's more than one? And I was like, oh my, more than 468 00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:55,079 how many? More? So then they did and there was always those two 469 00:31:55,200 --> 00:31:57,680 strong heart beats right, and then that other heartbeat was just kind of off 470 00:31:57,759 --> 00:32:00,799 to the side. And the doctor was like, yeah, you could do 471 00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:06,000 selective whatever reduction. But he's like, I get he goes, I've seen 472 00:32:06,039 --> 00:32:08,240 this a lot. He goes, I bet like by twelve weeks, that's 473 00:32:08,279 --> 00:32:12,440 going to be gone. And then it was gone. It was that third 474 00:32:12,480 --> 00:32:15,000 absorbed. Yeah. I never bled or anything. It was just gone. 475 00:32:15,599 --> 00:32:20,200 Yeah, that's so interesting. Never happened, no bleeding or anything. You 476 00:32:20,240 --> 00:32:22,200 didn't feel sad. But then no, after that, I was like, 477 00:32:22,279 --> 00:32:27,480 oh, twins, no problem, because for a long time, like triplets, 478 00:32:27,599 --> 00:32:31,599 what right right now? I was like freaking out and Wendy's like, 479 00:32:31,640 --> 00:32:34,920 oh, you can do. It's no problem. I'm about I'm like, 480 00:32:35,160 --> 00:32:39,880 bitch, please like no, you know anyway, but I convinced myself that 481 00:32:40,119 --> 00:32:44,319 I was like, Okay, so we're having three, but how much worse 482 00:32:44,400 --> 00:32:46,279 is three kids than two? Really? If you think about it, I'm 483 00:32:46,319 --> 00:32:50,000 like, you know, it's like at the beginning, yeah, double the 484 00:32:50,119 --> 00:32:52,759 diapers and double that. But then it gets easier because I wasn't thinking I 485 00:32:52,839 --> 00:32:57,319 had to freaking call it. You know, if I thought I head to 486 00:32:57,440 --> 00:33:01,119 college, I would have had a lot more anxiety about it. I mean 487 00:33:01,160 --> 00:33:05,359 I did have an anxiety. Of course I had anxiety. It's me, 488 00:33:05,720 --> 00:33:08,279 But I mean the twins part, I was like, I just got to 489 00:33:08,319 --> 00:33:12,119 get through this first like couple of years. That's what I kept thinking. 490 00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:14,960 I on the prize and you know, I cried all the time in our 491 00:33:15,039 --> 00:33:17,720 podcast and was like, is this going to get any easier? It's terrible 492 00:33:17,799 --> 00:33:22,000 when they were Look, I'm sorry all the moms out there. I want 493 00:33:22,039 --> 00:33:24,079 to be like more hopeful for you. If you're pregnant with twins, the 494 00:33:24,240 --> 00:33:30,000 first couple of years are a bit yes, Then what happens is once they're 495 00:33:30,000 --> 00:33:34,400 at an age where you can actually like go to a restaurant and you're not 496 00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:39,440 just constantly running around, right. It's and they start developing their own personalities, 497 00:33:39,559 --> 00:33:44,039 and then you're like, oh, yes, okay, I like having 498 00:33:44,200 --> 00:33:47,319 like of course I love having three kids. Now they're all so different, 499 00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:52,720 especially now that Elbie's almost out, I'm like, oh good, I got 500 00:33:52,759 --> 00:33:55,319 two more. Yeah, now that's what I was thinking. I was like, 501 00:33:55,519 --> 00:33:59,640 dang, you know, I've been thinking lately, like you know. 502 00:34:00,240 --> 00:34:01,480 Then everybody's like, are you gonna have any more? And I'm like, 503 00:34:01,519 --> 00:34:05,000 why would I have more? I got a boy and a girl one and 504 00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:07,480 done at once, you know too, and done at once, you know, 505 00:34:07,679 --> 00:34:09,719 like, hey, I don't have to do it again, like everybody, 506 00:34:10,159 --> 00:34:13,880 you know. But then I was like, I want to be nice 507 00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:16,679 if I had just done one more, like just one more. So there's 508 00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:21,679 three a couple of years younger. Yeah, just to you know, so 509 00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:24,119 I'm not such a shock when they go off to college, right, you 510 00:34:24,199 --> 00:34:28,800 know. So, I guess what we're saying is it's really really hard also 511 00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:34,000 have more kids exactly. It's just it is, it's it's like a blur 512 00:34:34,199 --> 00:34:37,000 for like the first few years was just a blur, you know, and 513 00:34:37,719 --> 00:34:42,639 you know, and and again like no grandparents or no no aunts or uncles 514 00:34:42,760 --> 00:34:45,360 or anyone. I mean, Olga, that was, you know, my 515 00:34:45,679 --> 00:34:50,960 only person and you know and uh it's and it's your first pregnancy too, 516 00:34:51,079 --> 00:34:53,199 so you don't know what to expect. You don't know what what does that 517 00:34:53,400 --> 00:34:57,119 mean when there's you know, this has happened, they're vomiting, or how 518 00:34:57,119 --> 00:34:59,760 do you bring a fever? Like you know, like who do you have? 519 00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:05,280 Right? Right? So remember that story about how when Elbe was like 520 00:35:07,239 --> 00:35:08,719 she was like eleven I want to say she was like eleven days old. 521 00:35:09,119 --> 00:35:13,800 She was less than two weeks old, and she was sleeping a lot, 522 00:35:14,559 --> 00:35:16,599 you know, not at night, but I mean, you know, all 523 00:35:16,719 --> 00:35:20,920 day long she would sleep. And I was like, this really seems like 524 00:35:20,960 --> 00:35:23,360 something's wrong. And I remember trying to talk myself down, but I had 525 00:35:24,000 --> 00:35:28,480 a lot of things I had. You think I'm anxious now. Post part 526 00:35:28,519 --> 00:35:32,440 of anxiety was insane through the roof, like all night long, googling things, 527 00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:37,239 you know, I mean, what does it mean? I wrote about 528 00:35:37,280 --> 00:35:39,760 this in my book, even just the laying. I remember laying on a 529 00:35:39,880 --> 00:35:45,719 bed with her, like testing her breath because I'd read somewhere that they should 530 00:35:45,719 --> 00:35:49,519 be breathing a certain amount of times per hour. Like I was really stressed 531 00:35:49,559 --> 00:35:53,039 out, you know, But I remember she was sleeping and sleeping and sleeping, 532 00:35:53,079 --> 00:35:58,920 and she wasn't waking up to eat. So I called the pediatrician, 533 00:35:59,079 --> 00:36:01,679 and I remember having to make that decision where you get the phone tree and 534 00:36:01,760 --> 00:36:06,800 they go, if this is an emergency, like if a true emergency, 535 00:36:06,960 --> 00:36:10,320 go to the er. But if it's an emergency, you can page doctor, 536 00:36:12,199 --> 00:36:14,679 or you can just leave a message if it's okay if they call you 537 00:36:14,760 --> 00:36:19,039 back like in an hour, right, or you can do an emergency page 538 00:36:19,079 --> 00:36:22,000 and they can call you back like within fifteen minutes. I remember having to 539 00:36:22,079 --> 00:36:27,400 make that choice. He's like, yeah, I mean she's not really waking 540 00:36:27,599 --> 00:36:30,280 up much like I have to like really like jostle her to wake her up. 541 00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:32,800 She doesn't want to wake up. And I couldn't decide, And in 542 00:36:32,880 --> 00:36:39,000 the end I decided it was an emergency. So the doctor calls me on 543 00:36:39,199 --> 00:36:42,920 call doctor and he was like, what's what's going on? And I said, 544 00:36:43,199 --> 00:36:46,079 well, she's really like lethargic, you know she's not, And he 545 00:36:46,159 --> 00:36:51,440 goes, okay, I go, she's just like sleeping and sleeping and sleeping 546 00:36:51,480 --> 00:36:53,840 and he goes, well, she wedding diapers and I said, yeah, 547 00:36:54,559 --> 00:36:58,760 yeah, and he goes, is she when she's awake? Like, is 548 00:36:58,840 --> 00:37:04,920 she eating? And I go and he's like, maybe she's tired. And 549 00:37:05,039 --> 00:37:08,119 You're like, what is this bitch tired from? She's only even alive eleven 550 00:37:08,239 --> 00:37:12,199 days? Was she got to sleep? For? I wish I'd had the 551 00:37:12,239 --> 00:37:15,480 wherewithal to say that, like, is she going to the gym? No, 552 00:37:15,920 --> 00:37:22,320 she needs to wake up, right. So yeah, I had one 553 00:37:22,360 --> 00:37:28,039 of those things with Natalia where she was like I just remember she would her 554 00:37:28,119 --> 00:37:30,320 eyes would roll in the back of her head a lot, like when she 555 00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:35,480 was really young, like like a month old, and I'm like, why 556 00:37:35,599 --> 00:37:37,519 does her eyes keep rolling? Like after I fed her and stuff, her 557 00:37:37,599 --> 00:37:42,440 eyes would roll, and I'm and so, I don't remember if I called 558 00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:45,760 a nurse, if I called the doctor or Wendy or somebody. But eventually 559 00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:50,840 they were just like, yeah, that's what babies do. They're they're they 560 00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:53,599 they're happy, they're happy, and they're she's sleeping like, but she would 561 00:37:53,679 --> 00:37:58,519 sleep with her eyes kind of half open, and it freaked me out. 562 00:37:58,960 --> 00:38:02,440 I was like, what is she doing? Why doesn't she close her eyes 563 00:38:02,639 --> 00:38:06,360 right? You know, right right, yeah, but but yeah, I 564 00:38:06,519 --> 00:38:08,119 had so many of those moments though, because you're like, you don't know 565 00:38:08,159 --> 00:38:10,559 what to do. Yeah, you just don't, I know. And my 566 00:38:10,719 --> 00:38:15,920 mother was you know, I know this isn't Patreon, and I try not 567 00:38:15,039 --> 00:38:19,039 to like bag on her too much on our regular show, but I remember 568 00:38:19,119 --> 00:38:22,039 her coming over. Her whole thing was like, you're fine. All the 569 00:38:22,119 --> 00:38:27,639 time. I was trying to breastfeed and it was impossibility, you know, 570 00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:31,280 and I'd had the breast reduction at that point, like twenty years before, 571 00:38:31,480 --> 00:38:35,079 and they had said you might not be able to breastfeed. So, as 572 00:38:35,480 --> 00:38:38,320 we've talked about many times, it was really really hard. But I felt 573 00:38:38,400 --> 00:38:43,239 a lot of pressure to do it because I had, remember I told you 574 00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:49,000 about that crazy postpartum doula I had who was like like a lactavist, Oh 575 00:38:49,079 --> 00:38:52,480 yeah, core like giving me the list of foods I can and cannot eat, 576 00:38:52,599 --> 00:38:55,760 and then she would come over and she would literally like grab my booth. 577 00:38:57,360 --> 00:39:00,960 I think she thought she was a full time black tas And then I'd 578 00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:04,960 have to lie and go no, I already just breastfed just right before you 579 00:39:05,039 --> 00:39:07,039 got here. But I was very stressed out about it. And it was 580 00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:10,239 I remember my mom just being like, well, I don't want you to 581 00:39:10,400 --> 00:39:15,599 stop, right. I'm like, because every what do you mean, I 582 00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:19,159 know, just stop? But she had breastfed too. She was like a 583 00:39:19,239 --> 00:39:22,519 hippie mom, but she was like, just don't worry about it. Yeah, 584 00:39:22,639 --> 00:39:27,800 that's the thing with twins too, because I was always like, you 585 00:39:27,880 --> 00:39:30,119 know, on this like sleep schedule, they got to eat at the same 586 00:39:30,159 --> 00:39:32,199 time, they got to go to sleep at the same time. And all 587 00:39:32,239 --> 00:39:36,840 my other friends were just like, why what it Just bring them over and 588 00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:38,800 let them sleep in the other like, and I'm like, but you don't 589 00:39:38,880 --> 00:39:43,519 understand. If like one falls asleep then the other one, then that one's 590 00:39:43,559 --> 00:39:45,480 gonna wake up, then the other one's gonna want and it's just never gonna 591 00:39:45,559 --> 00:39:49,599 end. It's a vis psy, such a bad cycle. Yeah, let's 592 00:39:49,639 --> 00:39:52,800 take a quick break. 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Okay, 635 00:43:01,840 --> 00:43:07,400 So yeah, the beginning with the babies is really really hard, yes, 636 00:43:07,760 --> 00:43:13,199 and you constantly think something's wrong, and my mom would come over and 637 00:43:14,199 --> 00:43:17,320 not help me with that. Like my mom's attitude was, I think, 638 00:43:17,559 --> 00:43:22,159 just like I raised three kids. It's it's easy. What are you complaining 639 00:43:22,199 --> 00:43:28,199 about? You know, And it's just like a different time though, And 640 00:43:28,599 --> 00:43:30,039 you know, there was a lot of eye rolling about the amount of stuff 641 00:43:30,079 --> 00:43:32,760 I needed, But I was like, I have to have an extra saucer 642 00:43:34,239 --> 00:43:37,960 and a swing and a jiminy, and I need all the things. I 643 00:43:37,159 --> 00:43:40,840 keep it moving. I gotta keep them moving, right, That's right. 644 00:43:42,039 --> 00:43:45,320 I remember, though, I got home from the hospital with you know, 645 00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:50,320 just speaking of like family support. I get home from the hospital, my 646 00:43:50,559 --> 00:43:54,000 mom comes over. I want to say, like maybe the day I get 647 00:43:54,079 --> 00:43:57,239 home because I had a C section with her, so I was in the 648 00:43:57,280 --> 00:44:02,039 hospital for a couple of days. I am trying to remember, maybe she 649 00:44:02,239 --> 00:44:07,760 visited me in the hospital, but you know, I feel like I might 650 00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:09,599 have handled things a little bit differently. The day after, you know, 651 00:44:09,639 --> 00:44:13,360 I get home, I'm home for a couple of days. She comes over 652 00:44:14,000 --> 00:44:17,519 and she brought soup. But the soup was like from her dinner that she'd 653 00:44:17,599 --> 00:44:21,480 have like a couple of days before. I told you that it was like 654 00:44:21,599 --> 00:44:24,840 leftovers, not not much was left over. She brought me like a bit 655 00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:30,079 of soup that was on her left over, her freaking leftovers, Like you 656 00:44:30,159 --> 00:44:34,320 can't go to a deli and get some like matza ball super like b Yeah, 657 00:44:34,920 --> 00:44:37,079 no, I you know what it was. It was like I was 658 00:44:37,159 --> 00:44:42,079 such an afterthought. It was such a like, oh, I guess I 659 00:44:42,199 --> 00:44:45,719 have to go help my daughter. I could tell that she didn't really want 660 00:44:45,760 --> 00:44:47,400 to be there. She was there for a little bit and then she was 661 00:44:47,480 --> 00:44:52,199 like, Okay, well I'm gonna go come luck with that, goodbye. 662 00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:55,960 You know, thank god I had. You would think I wouldn't have even 663 00:44:57,119 --> 00:45:00,880 needed a postpartum doula if I had a who lived in town exactly, you 664 00:45:01,079 --> 00:45:06,719 think brand new. I don't know. I know a lot of women my 665 00:45:06,920 --> 00:45:10,119 age who are becoming grandma's yeah the first time, and they are so excited, 666 00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:14,039 like there's a lot of stuff they can't do because they're like, oh 667 00:45:14,079 --> 00:45:15,880 no, I'm gonna go be with my daughter the baby. And they get 668 00:45:15,920 --> 00:45:20,880 so excited if they're going to watch the baby, you know, they're like, 669 00:45:20,960 --> 00:45:22,320 oh, I get to watch the baby. Like no, none of 670 00:45:22,360 --> 00:45:28,119 that was my mom's so bizarre. Did not want to watch I'll be that's 671 00:45:28,559 --> 00:45:32,800 crazy. It was a huge imposition. So yeah, no help. Now 672 00:45:32,880 --> 00:45:39,599 we're saying, and I remember not to you know whatever. But when I 673 00:45:39,760 --> 00:45:45,440 gave birth to the twins, my ex husband decided that was the two weeks 674 00:45:45,480 --> 00:45:52,480 he was going to take off of work to film his movie, so there 675 00:45:52,639 --> 00:45:58,320 was no extra hands. Wow. Yeah, you know, it was just 676 00:45:58,440 --> 00:46:01,400 I was just kind of thrown to the wolves with this new like you know 677 00:46:02,079 --> 00:46:07,079 nanny that we just way like, yeah, okay, I'm gonna take off 678 00:46:07,119 --> 00:46:08,840 time right, so the twins come so I can make a movie. Yeah, 679 00:46:08,840 --> 00:46:13,079 so the kids. Yes, I remember him coming to the hospital, 680 00:46:14,039 --> 00:46:16,039 sitting with the kids for a little while, and then leaving because he had 681 00:46:16,079 --> 00:46:19,800 to get up extra early to go film. It took two weeks to go 682 00:46:20,440 --> 00:46:27,280 film. Did you get it mad? Yeah? Yes? Wow? Yeah, 683 00:46:27,400 --> 00:46:31,519 But you know we're we We have a guest coming this week who is 684 00:46:32,320 --> 00:46:38,119 an ex. She's a Kate Anthony and she has a podcast about divorce. 685 00:46:38,800 --> 00:46:43,920 I listened to and I got a lot of questions, a lot of questions. 686 00:46:44,000 --> 00:46:47,239 We can't wait for her. Yeah, very successful podcast. You know 687 00:46:47,280 --> 00:46:55,760 who she's friends with, Robin Wazinski. Oh yeah, yeah. A lot 688 00:46:55,880 --> 00:47:00,440 of our audience is dealing with this. Yes, that's true. A lot 689 00:47:00,480 --> 00:47:05,079 of women in general deal with divorce. She's a divorce coach, right, 690 00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:08,519 so, which is awesome. I think something maybe I might need I could 691 00:47:08,559 --> 00:47:13,639 have used you. Well, you know, there's before, there's before divorce. 692 00:47:14,159 --> 00:47:17,639 There's deciding if you should be getting a divorce. Then there's going through 693 00:47:17,719 --> 00:47:21,599 the divorce. Then there's the post divorce. So I can't wait to talk 694 00:47:21,639 --> 00:47:24,360 to her. Yeah, and you know what we wanted to bring up before 695 00:47:24,480 --> 00:47:29,760 we have her on Thursday. Yes, on our Thursday show is the idea 696 00:47:30,519 --> 00:47:32,960 of because I was just listening, Okay, this is why I was listening 697 00:47:34,000 --> 00:47:37,239 to a forty eight hours Yeah, as you do. Yeah. And and 698 00:47:37,320 --> 00:47:39,199 by the way, Kate's in the room so she can hear this and then 699 00:47:39,440 --> 00:47:43,480 maybe speak to it. Yeah, on the show that she's on. Right, 700 00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:50,320 So I'm listening to this forty eight hours and it's about this this guy. 701 00:47:50,719 --> 00:47:52,519 And but this is a lot the theme of quite a few datelines and 702 00:47:52,559 --> 00:47:58,960 forty eight hours where the person is like, hey, if something happens to 703 00:47:59,079 --> 00:48:01,599 me, like my wife did it or my husband did it? Right, 704 00:48:01,719 --> 00:48:06,360 and they're like journaling, like I think something's going to happen, and I 705 00:48:06,440 --> 00:48:09,000 think this person's going to like poison me or kill me in my sleep or 706 00:48:09,039 --> 00:48:14,360 whatever. That seems like a good time to get a divorce. Maybe that's 707 00:48:14,440 --> 00:48:19,360 right. Yeah, Like, and I understand that there are I understand why 708 00:48:19,480 --> 00:48:22,039 people don't leave. Like it's really easy to say, of course, I'm 709 00:48:22,079 --> 00:48:23,159 not trying to blame the victim and say, like, if you're in a 710 00:48:23,199 --> 00:48:28,119 domestic violence situation, of course it's complicated, and of course it's dangerous to 711 00:48:28,199 --> 00:48:30,800 leave, and all of that I'm not trying to be problematic, right, 712 00:48:30,880 --> 00:48:36,559 but I'm saying, if you're like this person, if you're telling your friend 713 00:48:36,719 --> 00:48:39,840 friend like hey, if something, if I die, like check this guy 714 00:48:39,920 --> 00:48:44,760 out, how is your evening together? Like are you just watching Love Is 715 00:48:44,800 --> 00:48:47,480 Blind and being like, hey, money, I'll make you a cocktail? 716 00:48:49,119 --> 00:48:52,639 No? No, no, all myself one? Thank you? Right? 717 00:48:52,760 --> 00:48:55,239 Like that just seems ye, yeah, that seems like kind of a clear 718 00:48:55,400 --> 00:49:00,559 cut like this is probably a good person to divorce. Yeah, let's start. 719 00:49:00,599 --> 00:49:04,519 There's a lot of time, there's a lot of situations where it could 720 00:49:04,519 --> 00:49:07,920 seem more complicated making that decision. That one seems kind of pretty clear cut, 721 00:49:08,119 --> 00:49:12,119 right right, Yeah, but I don't know. We're gonna, well, 722 00:49:12,159 --> 00:49:15,000 we're gonna we're gonna talk to her. We're gonna ask about that. 723 00:49:15,400 --> 00:49:21,280 Okay, this has been super fun. Yeah, let's uh give our Patreon 724 00:49:21,400 --> 00:49:24,960 shout out. Yes, Adam Lerner, Yes, that's right. He's a 725 00:49:25,079 --> 00:49:30,960 car broker. He if you are looking to buy a new car, or 726 00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:35,719 or a used car or Lisa car, why would you not use a car 727 00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:38,320 broker. You're gonna save money, You're gonna not you can't get a better 728 00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:43,320 deal by yourself. A car broker has access to like better deals and then 729 00:49:43,360 --> 00:49:45,639 they'll handle they'll get you the best finance they do. They'll shop the rate 730 00:49:45,760 --> 00:49:50,199 for you and then they just bring the car to your driveway and you've signed 731 00:49:50,239 --> 00:49:52,039 some papers. It's the easiest thing ever. I would never not use a 732 00:49:52,119 --> 00:49:58,079 car broker. So get a hold of Adam Lerner at adams got acr dot 733 00:49:58,199 --> 00:50:01,599 com and he loves our FCOL listeners. Helped a lot of them get a 734 00:50:01,679 --> 00:50:07,679 car. Also, Christine has Storybook World Travel. They do travel around the 735 00:50:07,719 --> 00:50:10,440 world, not just theme parks. There's never a cost to use her services, 736 00:50:10,559 --> 00:50:17,199 It's free. She loves FCOL listeners, so go to Storybook World Travel 737 00:50:17,320 --> 00:50:23,760 find them on Facebook or Storybookworldtravel dot com. Also, sorry, Family Skeptical. 738 00:50:24,159 --> 00:50:30,519 Yes, the podcast about raising your kids without any kind of religious beliefs. 739 00:50:30,880 --> 00:50:32,679 Yeah, it's a good idea. Yeah. And if you're doing that 740 00:50:32,880 --> 00:50:36,440 and you don't want to feel so alone, why not listen to the Family 741 00:50:36,519 --> 00:50:39,360 Skeptical And I do. I'm not going to say the name of the person 742 00:50:39,400 --> 00:50:43,639 who hosts the show, by the way, because she asked me not to, 743 00:50:44,159 --> 00:50:45,599 right, she doesn't want to get hate. That's how ridiculous it is. 744 00:50:46,119 --> 00:50:51,000 That people get mad at you for that anyway. Also Wilmanfrida, Palm 745 00:50:51,079 --> 00:50:54,480 Springs pod Me. Yes, we love their food. We love Kelly. 746 00:50:55,000 --> 00:51:00,000 Go check them out if you're in Palm Springs or Palm Desert. Also basicly 747 00:51:00,079 --> 00:51:04,719 Becky, just Basic Bey or basic Becky on Facebook. Get a T shirt, 748 00:51:04,840 --> 00:51:09,159 get a mug, get a mousepadad yes, god to get all the 749 00:51:09,280 --> 00:51:13,199 things. You can make your own design. She'll design it for you, 750 00:51:13,400 --> 00:51:15,960 or you can look on our website and use what she has. Yeah, 751 00:51:16,079 --> 00:51:20,280 and we'll do the rest on Friday. All right, Thanks everybody, everybody. 752 00:51:20,360 --> 00:51:27,119 You're a parent, now, don't if it up. It's good letting go.