WEBVTT

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Welcome to ghost Wax, a foreign
Tall Tales production. The following story may

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contain graphic content. Listener discretion is
advised. Ghost Wax is written and directed

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by Robert Knutsen, production and editing
by Aaron Schenrock. Our theme song is

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by Bo Hoover. This episode features
Robert Kannutzen as Von sid and Harold,

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Aaron Schenrock as Luca, Stephanie Olsen
as Pip, h J. Raider as

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Olivia, a La Lushka as Amya, Mitchell Brooks as Charlie, Sarah Becasme

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as Adelaide, and Mark ar Kusha
as Sane. Outro music by Colton Warren.

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Episode forty four, Dissent to great
so quiet with the glass up?

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I prefer the breeze can't be helped. Don't despair. I will try.

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We have reason to be optimistic,
after all, though the recent history of

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banishings is how many of us are
there left? After Dalton twenty two,

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The last Stand of the Last Stand. You said you'd try. Yes,

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not to despair, and I shall. Olivia will banish the cipher, the

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plague will subside, Brighter days are
ahead. You'll see very good, very

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good. Right the ardent locked down
tight, air tight, nothing will enter

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up to the vanishing. We were
just discussing how you will perform brilliantly,

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and that we have total faith in
you. Don't make that face. We

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were fine. I believe you.
I do wish you would take the rekindled

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Adelaide into the chamber with you,
even just as a reservoir. She could

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be so helpful. You are lucky
we've allowed it to stay in the building.

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We have nothing to fear from her. Similar assurances were made of the

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last just before the murders. That
was truly different. She really is a

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nice young woman. They all seem
nice, but they are animals. The

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second you forget that, you are
locked in a cage with animals. But

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yes, very well, all possible
assets must be evaluated. Some of us

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still follow protocol. I think you'll
like her. It's time, Emir,

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would you accompany me to the upper
chamber. I'd be delighted, And Master

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Von said yes, I am censured, so I am not allowed into the

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upper chamber. I will continue my
functions and protect the ardent. Good.

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I don't imagine this will take over
long. Olivia, fight well, you

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will prevail. We had best hope. So that's it. The Ardent is

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sealed and the upper chamber is cloistered
above. Nothing can go in or out.

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We are well stocked on snacks.
How long could this take? The

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longest banishings have taken upwards of six
months. Welcome to my world. Yes,

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I suppose so, But Charlie,
I assure you, once this banishing

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concludes, we will work on freeing
you from the confines of the lodge.

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If the eyes that pursue you are
agents of the Cipher, they will be

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greatly diminished. And if they aren't, we'll find out what they are and

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how to help you. I just
want to know we have fresh water.

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I can resort to cannibalism if I
have to, but dying of thirst is

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one of my greatest fears after the
salt mummies. Oh yes, fresh water

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in a reservoir. Additionally, the
alchemists have core matter that they can render

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into many simple materials we might need
on demand. I dare say the Ardent

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is now our own little vessel,
unmoored from reality, itself, self sufficient

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and safe. The safest location may
be anywhere we are unmoored from the cosmos,

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and yet they still expect us to
work. It's just a few reclaimings

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from the backlog. Pip, will
you come with us to the labs.

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I know we're all sealed in and
all, but I would still feel better

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if I had you in sight.
Very sweet, but let's call it earshot.

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When the bodies start moving and talking
and shit, I just can't Adelaide.

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Yes, I'm feeling Wow. Luca, is the ghost wax picking her

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up? Yes, I think so. I still can't hear anything she's saying,

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but the needle is moving. Good, Adelaide. Your speech should continue

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to return to you as your strength
continues to grow. Grow already feel so

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strong. Oh, yes, you
are only just beginning. Amazing. Do

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you hear the phantoma responding to her
trying to talk? I do? They

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are kindred spirits after all. I
feel fear, I feel attention all around.

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I want to help. How can
I help? Unfortunately, I think

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it will take some time before the
others are fully willing to make use of

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your more wondrous capabilities. You see, Adelaide, Addie, please, yes,

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Addie, the other Hamsa and I
in the pursuit of our great work,

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well, we are very protective of
our safety. We are by our

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nature very hard to harm layers and
layers. It's hard to explain, but

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the part of the issue is you
are one of the rare things that could

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harm us easily if you so chose. They are afraid rekindled have hurt us

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in the past. You are a
weapon, and for now a weapon is

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all they can see. But I
know that you are more. I have

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seen your heart and I will show
you mine by my deeds. The others

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will too. We have nothing to
fear from each other. We want the

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same thing, all of us,
I think agreed. Yes, this building

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is on moored. We are very
safe, but still with all hands on

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deck in the upper chamber, would
you stay and watch the apiary, keep

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the phantomer company. When we are
closed like this, they tend to get

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a little bit lonely. Yes,
I like them. They're there. Rest

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your voice. We will be back
shortly. We are going to reclaim a

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young man who died very unnaturally and
see if we can determine why it happened

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and what we might do about it. Okay, uh, shall we yes,

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walk and talk with me Luca while
we have a moment here? Yeah,

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a gift? What really? Yes, it's nothing extravagant. I suppose

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it is rare. Why did wait
one year ago we started working together officially.

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I can't believe it's only been a
year. It has been eventful.

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What what is this? When you
were taken into the order, they took

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an object from you, I know
that it was very difficult, and well,

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while this is not them little if
that gave the object its power,

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it is something I made. In
the likeness of it. It's called a

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tumbling staircase, an impossible object like
the one you manifested, just not so

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puissant. It's it's beautiful. The
things you make are beautiful, full of

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goodness, purity of intent. We
cannot choose what others do with what we

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put into the world. We can
but put them into the world with an

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open heart. I am to wax
sentimental, quite inspired by you. Thank

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you. You are a good friend
and a fine young man. I don't

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mean to overstep, but I often
feel very much like an inverted Geppetto to

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your Pinocchio, only in that you
are young and proficient with the making of

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things, and I am older and
well wish you were a real boy.

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Forgive the metaphor, it was muddled
I'd have been rather lucky if you'd actually

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been my father. Well, I
look forward to working with you more.

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Yeah, me too. So,
hey, you too cool working on it?

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Are we cool? What do you
mean? Just feels I don't know,

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I feel weird about everything. No, it's it's gonna be fine,

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crazy days. Yeah, speaking of
which, do you hear that I've been

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feeling like I can Yeah, sounds
so bizarre. Ever since they sealed the

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building off, something is really different. Something in the walls. Yeah,

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come put your ear here. Huh
that's yeah, what is that? Usually

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you get like pipe sounds or buzzing
from electricity ere you know, building noises,

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but there's like nothing less than nothing. Weird. Hey you two?

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Uh having a nice wall? Listen
quiet, We are listening to the wall.

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Yes, the ritual has many bizarre
secondary effects. By the way,

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if your cell phones get any textual
messages from numbers you don't know, numbers

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from people outside the building or from
any deceased relatives, do not respond.

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How incredibly haunting. Yes, so
you said unmoored from reality? How literal

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is that? If I went to
the front doors and like got them open

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somehow would we all be pulled out
into the vacuum of space. No,

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I mean, I don't think so. Or would it be like a desert

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out there and big sandworms would start
chasing us and eat Pip. At least

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I get to be Geena Davis in
this reference, what would happen? You'd

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likely see the buildings across the street, people passing by, but were you

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to exit, you'd be lost elsewhere. We only appear to be where we

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currently are, So where are we
really? Nowhere? Ominous? It's the

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last peaceful place in the cosmos.
Honestly, what a sad thought. Not

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all violentles is bad. The crucible
of a star is quite violent. Not

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all chaos is undesirable. The fragmenting
and spiraling of galaxies is a thing of

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great beauty, even if it is
mostly madness. So poetic today, Eh,

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poetry, Grandpa doesn't really work.
Apologies I wax philosophical during a banishing,

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especially ones I cannot be part of. Yeah, what bullshit. I

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made my bed of coals, now
I lie in it. It's not fair.

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The injustice I am concerned with is
the one that befell this young John

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Doe in our examination laboratory. Shall
we attend to them. Oh boy,

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I can't believe I don't get to
see Olivia twist that tick mister media out

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of our reality. Instead, I
get stuck on corpse chat duty. I'll

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try not to take it personally that
you referred to the Chapter of Reclaimers and

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their sacred duties as corpse chat.
Sorry, all right, let's head down

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there. This is Master Reclaimer Owen
von Sid, together with Philippa, James

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Seer, Charles Baybridge, Order Initiate
and Luca Eso Reclaimer. Shit did we

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all just get promotions? They cleared
me? Oh wow, that hit harder

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than I imagined it would children later
mm mmm, Master Reclaimer Owen von Sid

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in attendance. The deceased was recovered
by Francis Faraday and Margo and Jeers in

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a tenement building in Lancaster, Pennsylvania
on a lead provided by Miss Philippa.

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The subject has not been able to
be identified due to a complete lack of

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a face, arms, or other
means of identification. Oh that reminds me.

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I keep forgetting how ubiquitous tattoos are, Luca Charlie, did either of

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you note any identifying tattoos on the
body during your initial examination? No,

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Nope. Yes, well, m
I see why we were given this one.

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A reclaiming of some kind would be
the only way to identify this body,

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as his DNA was nowhere in the
system either. This poor fellow has

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had all traces of himself erased.
As I said, the subject's face and

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arms and therefore finger prints are missing. There are no marks, cuts,

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or surgical indications of any kind,
simply smooth, unbroken absences where it seems

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any marring of the flesh has been
erased. Sinuses, mandible material, facial

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structures all visible, but those cross
sectioned appear undamaged. The face has been

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removed back to the line of the
ears, the left arm up to the

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shoulder, the right midway through the
forearm. There are no signs of bleeding,

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and the report indicated that there was
no blood at the scene, though

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it was a transient flophouse of sorts, so said scene was not the most

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secure and may have been tampered with. Reclaiming will begin after final preparations.

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Philippa, are you sensing anything disgusted? But nothing from the body. It's

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like its blank. How are we
going to do this one? Do you

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want to draw out the spirit?
Inhabit them. Well, I actually have

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an apparatus for situations like this.
Get a lot of faceless cases more often

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than I'd care to. There were
a series of cases where a killer had

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come to learn of the Reclaimer order, and, in an attempt to render

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the dead unable to speak to us, destroyed their faces. Luckily, my

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predecessor was a master medium and an
early adopter of the spirit board get out.

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Oh yes, we solved a fair
few grisly ones with a planchette in

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hand. That's incredible. I,
however, was interested in giving the dead

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a more physical final experience, and
so I repurposed something U Luca, the

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large glossy box there. Oh,
this crest looks familiar. Yes, there

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aren't many of them left. But
the chapter of wheels sort of your predecessors,

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I suppose the artificers whoa oh wow, holy shit, this porcelain face

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once sat upon a meticulously crafted and
lifelike automaton of human shape. They became

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quite a lot more than a gilded
curiosity, and were gifted flesh. However,

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this beautiful face seemed a shame for
it not to have a use.

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Are you talking about Cooza? The
librarian was a puppet person. That's why

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you were talking about Pinocchio earlier,
because you were carrying a puppet face in

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your bag. Huh, Maybe you
are right. At any rate, I

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will affix the prosthetic to the body
and they can inform us as to what

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transpired. Oh lord, hang in
there, After what you've been through,

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I'm sure this won't be that bad. Yeah, just a limbless dead body

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with an articulated automaton mask telling us
how it died. No, big please,

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don't let me get used to this, Shita. Could you hand me

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the suture kit? Lost soul come
home again, return to us and tell

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us your tale. Use these borrowed
eyes to see and lips to speak.

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Oh no, oh no, I
am so sorry, but your life has

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ended. Nothing will harm you now
though, and not ever again. We

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wish to help you. Oh no, I I knew this would happen eventually.

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Why why I knew I was going
to die? Fuck Mama's right.

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Breathe in and breathe out. I
am getting some intense feedback as I apply

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pressure to try and calm them.
Whatever killed them left quite a mark here.

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Let me just make a little adjustment
there try speaking again. Oh that

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that feels much better the magic touch. Can you tell us your name,

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Zaine, I'm saying, don't ask
me my last name. Perhaps your family

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would No, I don't want them
to know anything. Nothing. Please,

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I'm gone. Okay, I'm dead
to them already. They don't they don't

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need to grieve me again. Okay, very well, But Zay, could

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you tell us what happened to your
body? There seems to be a good

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deal of you missing. Yeah.
Oh yeah, Wow, my face must

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have fallen in or maybe they put
it in. Wow, that was the

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rush of a lifetime just thinking about
it. God, it felt so good.

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It was almost worth it. They
who Harold? Or? He said

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it was Harold. He showed me
where the soft spot was, where to

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find the hole, how to use
it. I want to be mad at

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him since it killed me, but
I've done everything like meth heroin fuck unnamed

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laboratory shit that won't be ruining people's
lives on the street for years yet.

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00:22:07.119 --> 00:22:15.720
But oh wow, nothing was like
this, Charlie. If you would take

204
00:22:15.759 --> 00:22:26.920
down the name Harold or I wonder
Harold a herald pardon? Please tell us

205
00:22:26.000 --> 00:22:36.279
what happened to you? Uh,
I'll spare you and I the painful backstory.

206
00:22:36.400 --> 00:22:40.480
If it's all the same, the
abuse, the acting out, the

207
00:22:40.480 --> 00:22:47.480
first using, the getting kicked out
of the house, so many variations from

208
00:22:47.920 --> 00:22:55.119
so many people, but all essentially
the same. You can just fill in

209
00:22:55.160 --> 00:22:59.759
the blanks. There is no need. This is your story. We would

210
00:22:59.759 --> 00:23:04.200
listen into whatever you wish to say. Yeah, no, we don't,

211
00:23:04.279 --> 00:23:11.400
We don't need to. Okay,
Well, I do want to say one

212
00:23:11.480 --> 00:23:15.880
thing about it. I mean that
recording thing, like if anyone is going

213
00:23:15.960 --> 00:23:23.359
to listen to this ever, I
guess just like, don't take shit your

214
00:23:23.440 --> 00:23:27.000
kids do that, that's that's bad, or or you think is bad.

215
00:23:29.160 --> 00:23:36.279
Don't take it personally. Not everything
your kid does is some attack on you

216
00:23:36.440 --> 00:23:45.640
or the family name or whatever.
My using was because of a whole I

217
00:23:45.720 --> 00:23:52.000
had inside myself, one that got
opened up by a few neighbor boys and

218
00:23:52.039 --> 00:23:59.880
then got made worse and worse over
time, filled in, torn open,

219
00:24:00.079 --> 00:24:11.000
and then made wider and wider by
little cruelty after little cruelty. But shit

220
00:24:11.240 --> 00:24:15.960
with my parents didn't get really bad
until they caught me using pills and decided

221
00:24:17.119 --> 00:24:23.200
that was me declaring war against the
family, the house and them personally like

222
00:24:25.759 --> 00:24:33.000
I liked them fine until all that
shit started. Anyways, Like Mom and

223
00:24:33.079 --> 00:24:40.319
Dad, I wasn't trying to hurt
you, Okay, fuck that. I

224
00:24:40.319 --> 00:24:48.440
don't need to do that dance anymore. I bounced around, homed, unhomed,

225
00:24:48.839 --> 00:24:56.440
homed again. And you know,
you don't know scary until you've been

226
00:24:56.480 --> 00:25:03.079
out on the street at night and
with with the shadows walking all around,

227
00:25:03.680 --> 00:25:12.960
feeling like you are being followed,
and then realize you don't have anywhere to

228
00:25:14.119 --> 00:25:22.000
go, nowhere to hide. That's
when I started taking lots of uppers.

229
00:25:22.440 --> 00:25:26.000
Gotta stay up all night, watch
your own back, sleep when you can

230
00:25:26.160 --> 00:25:30.400
during the day, but you gotta
spend all day trying to score really,

231
00:25:30.480 --> 00:25:37.960
so you wind up not sleeping much
at all. And so you see shit,

232
00:25:38.160 --> 00:25:42.039
That's why so many of my friends
who didn't have anywhere wound up seeming

233
00:25:42.240 --> 00:25:48.640
so haunted. I think, you
know, no sleep, no dreams,

234
00:25:48.119 --> 00:25:59.079
no kind of dreams at all,
but surrounded by nightmares. I'd hallucinated before,

235
00:25:59.319 --> 00:26:06.359
never going up or down, but
just from the not sleeping. So

236
00:26:06.440 --> 00:26:10.599
this guy, Harold, I had
seen him around a few places and I

237
00:26:10.680 --> 00:26:15.039
never really knew him, but he
waved me over in this empty building.

238
00:26:15.160 --> 00:26:18.359
A bunch of us were hanging out, and you know we could get into

239
00:26:18.440 --> 00:26:25.480
through the door someone forgot to lock. Anyways, Harold waves me over and

240
00:26:26.319 --> 00:26:30.359
didn't say anything at first, just
waves. He always wears his hoodie up.

241
00:26:30.400 --> 00:26:33.720
You know, he's got a few
of them, always these like loud

242
00:26:34.039 --> 00:26:38.680
patterns all over them. Looks like
he's got graffiti drawn all over him.

243
00:26:38.759 --> 00:26:45.480
And it's kind of cool actually,
But he's got a mask on. Said

244
00:26:45.480 --> 00:26:48.440
it's because he's burned, but I
don't know. Guy's a nut whatever.

245
00:26:48.519 --> 00:26:55.160
It's got little x's for eyes and
a smile stitched on. I used to

246
00:26:55.160 --> 00:26:59.640
think it was kind of scary,
but the pandemic days everyone had a mask,

247
00:26:59.720 --> 00:27:04.880
so by then it wasn't even that
weird. Okay, So he waves

248
00:27:04.920 --> 00:27:14.960
me over and just points. There's
this spot on the wall, middle of

249
00:27:15.000 --> 00:27:18.119
a concrete wall, super tagged up, lots and lots of spray paint and

250
00:27:18.160 --> 00:27:23.359
shit all over it, but no
names I recognize, or any cruise,

251
00:27:23.559 --> 00:27:32.160
just like pictures and shapes like crazy
trippy shit. But there's this spot on

252
00:27:32.200 --> 00:27:37.759
the wall where all the other pictures
are kind of pointing towards that spot.

253
00:27:37.920 --> 00:27:45.559
Doesn't have any paint at all just
a sign drawn over it that says Heaven.

254
00:27:45.759 --> 00:27:51.079
Only the H and the E were
both capitalized, so maybe HEV and

255
00:27:51.559 --> 00:27:59.720
I don't know Heaven. Yeah,
and it wasn't lying Just looking at it,

256
00:28:00.240 --> 00:28:07.000
I could feel my mind slowing down. Then Harold said this weird fucking

257
00:28:07.039 --> 00:28:14.640
thing. What did he say to
me? Come on saying, go ahead,

258
00:28:14.680 --> 00:28:21.279
reach out and touch faith. Yeah? Well, I already wanted to,

259
00:28:22.319 --> 00:28:29.960
wanted to reach out. And when
just the tippy tip of my finger

260
00:28:30.079 --> 00:28:41.039
touched it, electric liquid relief,
this flood of joy rushing up my fingers

261
00:28:41.039 --> 00:28:48.160
and into my blood, like pure
love. Part of me wanted to shove

262
00:28:48.240 --> 00:28:52.119
my arm and just right away,
the opposite of touching a hot stove.

263
00:28:52.440 --> 00:28:59.880
Right, But a little part of
me self preservation screamed out, and so

264
00:29:00.039 --> 00:29:08.440
oh I pulled back. Nice it
was. It was the nicest. But

265
00:29:08.559 --> 00:29:18.519
then there was numb, like more
than numb. Nothing in the dim,

266
00:29:18.839 --> 00:29:25.240
dirty light of that empty building.
I could see where the tip of my

267
00:29:25.400 --> 00:29:30.920
finger wasn't just empty space at the
end of my knuckle. Oh god,

268
00:29:32.920 --> 00:29:41.880
she sure felt like it. Sorry, I feel kind of dusty. Oh

269
00:29:41.960 --> 00:29:47.440
my, perhaps I didn't clear the
mask thoroughly. I'm very sorry. I

270
00:29:47.440 --> 00:29:51.480
I'm sorry. I feel like I
have something in my eye. You okay,

271
00:29:52.359 --> 00:29:56.640
it's all right, Charlie Van said, Oh, and could could you

272
00:29:56.680 --> 00:30:03.000
look in my eyes? Do you
see anything? M No, I do

273
00:30:03.119 --> 00:30:11.400
not. Okay, that's okay.
Maybe you should go rinse them. Yeah,

274
00:30:11.480 --> 00:30:15.160
yeah, okay, I'll be right
back. I'll go with him.

275
00:30:15.200 --> 00:30:22.519
I could use a break. I
understand. Poor kid. Mm hmm,

276
00:30:23.240 --> 00:30:29.559
he's a user. Oh you think
so? Lah, Yeah, definitely,

277
00:30:30.720 --> 00:30:37.039
you're right. He told me he's
had addiction problems before, he had to

278
00:30:37.119 --> 00:30:40.400
take a year off to get it
under control before he went to college.

279
00:30:41.400 --> 00:30:48.759
I see nothing to be ashamed of, certainly, but perhaps this story was

280
00:30:48.559 --> 00:30:55.680
Yeah. I think it was getting
to him realizing how this is gonna end.

281
00:30:56.359 --> 00:31:03.160
Poor boy. M hm, you
had discovered the cost of this mysterious

282
00:31:03.279 --> 00:31:11.279
spot in the wall. Yep.
When I came to Harold was gone.

283
00:31:11.599 --> 00:31:18.799
I had lost hours just that tiny
little touch, and I'd sailed away for

284
00:31:18.279 --> 00:31:25.240
hours. I went around looking for
him to ask him what the hell was

285
00:31:25.279 --> 00:31:29.880
going on, but I couldn't find
him. A part of me was pissed,

286
00:31:29.920 --> 00:31:32.960
like thinking he put something on the
wall, like some kind of acid.

287
00:31:33.160 --> 00:31:40.559
Maybe part of me hoped he had
more, but I couldn't find him.

288
00:31:41.599 --> 00:31:45.359
So I went back to the spot, half expecting it to be gone,

289
00:31:45.599 --> 00:31:52.759
you know, but it wasn't.
It was there. I started like

290
00:31:53.440 --> 00:32:00.359
messing with it. It was soft, the spot. I tried pushing stuff

291
00:32:00.359 --> 00:32:04.960
into it later, like the concrete
was like I don't know, doweye.

292
00:32:05.640 --> 00:32:09.440
Whatever I pushed in there, like
a broom handle or a rock gone,

293
00:32:10.319 --> 00:32:16.079
The rock came back, sheared clean. The edge sharp enough that I sliced

294
00:32:16.079 --> 00:32:21.079
a finger on it, like the
tip of my index finger just flapped loose

295
00:32:21.400 --> 00:32:27.799
because the edge was so sharp,
which is when I got the idea,

296
00:32:29.279 --> 00:32:37.400
the idea to reach in again,
just a little, just using this part

297
00:32:37.440 --> 00:32:44.359
of my finger I already had practically
cut off when I thought that, Like

298
00:32:45.119 --> 00:32:52.079
shit, I got so scared.
I realized then what was going to happen,

299
00:32:52.920 --> 00:32:58.440
Just like with all the other shit, A little bit, a taste,

300
00:32:58.720 --> 00:33:05.640
a touch, but then it's so
good you hope it never ever ends,

301
00:33:05.720 --> 00:33:10.319
and so you start to compromise more
and more, give it more and

302
00:33:10.400 --> 00:33:15.799
more of yourself, and fuck.
This spot in the wall was like a

303
00:33:15.880 --> 00:33:24.119
metaphor made real. Right. I
walked around the building. I found this

304
00:33:24.160 --> 00:33:28.759
guy I knew who had some paint
pens. I went back to the hole

305
00:33:28.759 --> 00:33:35.759
and xed out the word heaven wrote
in don't I knew what was going to

306
00:33:35.759 --> 00:33:40.440
happen, left wrote it off,
planned to move towns if I had to,

307
00:33:40.640 --> 00:33:51.319
But I mean I was a goner. I'd been bit. I could

308
00:33:51.400 --> 00:33:57.759
practically feel my brain rewiring itself into
a machine that just said get more.

309
00:33:59.200 --> 00:34:08.760
Fuck. Nothing else felt good anymore. Nothing. I don't even really remember

310
00:34:08.840 --> 00:34:15.360
going back, rationalizing all the way
you cut your finger. It's so dirty

311
00:34:15.719 --> 00:34:21.280
where you've been staying, you'll probably
get an infection. Anyways, might be

312
00:34:21.559 --> 00:34:30.079
a good idea to just lose that
little bit. Before I knew what was

313
00:34:30.119 --> 00:34:37.760
happening, I gave it my index
finger up to my knuckle. So stupid.

314
00:34:39.519 --> 00:34:45.119
I'm so sorry. God damn it, I'm so fucking sorry. I'm

315
00:34:45.159 --> 00:34:51.880
sorry to myself, God damn it, say please forgive me. Fuck fuck.

316
00:34:52.800 --> 00:35:05.880
But it was so so good.
It felt like falling into infinity,

317
00:35:06.920 --> 00:35:19.639
fucking ambrosia. My soul was singing, you just you can't know what you

318
00:35:19.960 --> 00:35:29.039
do to get that feeling back.
I do, I understand, Yeah,

319
00:35:29.119 --> 00:35:32.519
you do, don't you. You
You've got the look of someone who had

320
00:35:32.639 --> 00:35:46.119
heaven lost it can't find the way
back, don't you. Oh, well,

321
00:35:47.159 --> 00:35:53.119
shit, I think. Once I'd
lost my whole left hand, I

322
00:35:53.199 --> 00:36:00.079
started giving it more to like fight
the feeling of horror and shame at having

323
00:36:00.159 --> 00:36:07.079
already given it so much, I
couldn't stop. This wasn't like a normal

324
00:36:07.119 --> 00:36:13.719
fix. It wasn't I would stuff
my sleeve into my pocket, trying to

325
00:36:13.760 --> 00:36:19.760
make it look like I still had
had an arm. I don't know who

326
00:36:19.840 --> 00:36:22.719
I was trying to fool. I
don't know who would have even noticed or

327
00:36:23.360 --> 00:36:35.360
cared if they did. I don't
know. Shame is a fucked up funny

328
00:36:35.360 --> 00:36:42.360
thing. I got all the way
up to my shoulder one night, and

329
00:36:42.440 --> 00:36:49.960
the euphoria got so intense I almost
passed out and fell forward my face like

330
00:36:50.079 --> 00:36:57.440
almost grazed it. That was a
wake up call. I realized how easy,

331
00:36:57.639 --> 00:37:07.760
how fucking easy, it would be
fall asleep and fall in. I

332
00:37:07.920 --> 00:37:22.880
was so scared, get me away
about a week. I might have stayed

333
00:37:23.280 --> 00:37:31.840
away forever. But Harold showed back
up new neon pink mask, shining out

334
00:37:32.000 --> 00:37:37.679
under his hood at me in the
dark. You know it misses you,

335
00:37:38.679 --> 00:37:49.280
it told me. He said that
to me, and his breath. There

336
00:37:49.440 --> 00:37:57.920
was something in it a smell.
I didn't realize I had missed some kind

337
00:37:57.960 --> 00:38:05.840
of incense, and I realized that
the spot smelled like incense. And fuck,

338
00:38:07.880 --> 00:38:12.119
I don't even know what happened,
but I was back there again.

339
00:38:14.559 --> 00:38:21.360
This time was different. Before all
of me had focused in so hard on

340
00:38:21.480 --> 00:38:28.159
it, on the fix, but
now I felt like it was watching me,

341
00:38:29.400 --> 00:38:38.800
like it had been waiting for me. I just grazed it and lightning

342
00:38:39.800 --> 00:38:51.559
white hot everywhere, and I slipped. I knew it was going to happen.

343
00:38:51.719 --> 00:38:55.199
I'd scolded and screamed at myself all
week about it. Do you want

344
00:38:55.559 --> 00:39:07.639
to fucking die? But then it
just happened. My legs gave out,

345
00:39:08.960 --> 00:39:19.639
I fell. I fell into it. This big bang of pleasure went straight

346
00:39:19.719 --> 00:39:25.800
to my brain through the face that
disintegrated into the hole in the wall.

347
00:39:30.239 --> 00:39:38.880
Part of me is still there,
a forever moment, my last moment.

348
00:39:40.480 --> 00:39:51.199
Oh, God's saying, I am
so sorry. But wait, there's there's

349
00:39:51.239 --> 00:40:00.159
something else I can My ears were
left. I hear something. It's Harold.

350
00:40:00.239 --> 00:40:07.239
He's talking. He's over me,
Yes, concentrate. What is he

351
00:40:07.400 --> 00:40:15.679
saying? Yeah, it's weird.
It almost seems like he's talking to the

352
00:40:15.719 --> 00:40:24.480
whole dong to worry. He says, don't worry. I just need him

353
00:40:24.559 --> 00:40:35.440
to stay alive long enough to finish
the big nasty on his back. What

354
00:40:35.480 --> 00:40:40.000
does that mean, the big nasty
on my back? Oh? Yeah,

355
00:40:40.079 --> 00:40:45.840
yeah, then I felt like I
mean, they didn't even really register because

356
00:40:46.320 --> 00:40:52.039
of the bliss rolling through me.
But I think he rolled me over.

357
00:40:52.559 --> 00:41:00.000
I think he burned something into my
back, like a shape, A shape,

358
00:41:00.320 --> 00:41:07.800
a big sharp star. I I
thought, Luca. Didn't you say

359
00:41:07.840 --> 00:41:14.440
there were no markings, you didn't
see any during the initial exam. No,

360
00:41:14.719 --> 00:41:20.239
I didn't see any. I don't
think I did. Perhaps it was

361
00:41:20.360 --> 00:41:27.840
hidden somehow or healed. Here.
Help me turn him over and we will

362
00:41:28.039 --> 00:41:35.599
see what we can find. Yes, a scisun is inscribed. What is

363
00:41:35.679 --> 00:41:49.199
this form? Oh god, old
Luca. Oh shit, oh oh wow,

364
00:41:49.639 --> 00:41:57.800
Charlie, deep breaths. Are you
okay? Put your head under the

365
00:41:57.800 --> 00:42:06.880
faucet here? Oh shit? Oh
fuck? Oh okay, Charlie, let's

366
00:42:06.880 --> 00:42:15.320
get you to medical. Okay,
come here, okay, hey, Pip,

367
00:42:15.079 --> 00:42:20.199
yeah, what is it? Would
you look into my eyes? Okay?

368
00:42:20.280 --> 00:42:31.320
Sure? Let me Oh oh no
ah, hey hey just sit down.

369
00:42:34.280 --> 00:42:37.239
No oh, here you go sit
down. You're going into shock.

370
00:42:37.920 --> 00:42:45.960
I Okay, keep breathing. I
don't know what you did exactly why.

371
00:42:45.960 --> 00:42:50.840
This is what they want. They
showed you the truth, so now your

372
00:42:50.840 --> 00:42:58.400
eyes belong to them. Fuck you, this is your fault. It's your

373
00:42:58.480 --> 00:43:00.880
fault. I have to do this. You think I want this? Fuck

374
00:43:01.639 --> 00:43:07.239
you. You broke their heart,
Pip, you have to pay for it.

375
00:43:13.320 --> 00:43:15.920
Okay, okay, okay, holy
shit, this is really happening.

376
00:43:16.360 --> 00:43:22.599
Fuck okay the shock. Lean into
it and let that happen. It'll be

377
00:43:22.639 --> 00:43:31.199
easier. Okay, one down,
once to go. Don't take a lass.

378
00:43:31.239 --> 00:43:49.880
Look around, don't you okay?
Please? Oh God, please please

379
00:43:49.960 --> 00:43:59.119
wake up. I'm so sorry.
Oh my boy, God right, I

380
00:43:59.239 --> 00:44:08.960
can't. I can't hold on,
Oh Charley, thank the God's stay back,

381
00:44:09.079 --> 00:44:15.719
please please. The car's fire is
still burning. Can you see him,

382
00:44:15.960 --> 00:44:22.079
guy, he's here beneath me,
but flash my eyes? Is he

383
00:44:22.320 --> 00:44:29.440
okay? You shielded him? I
tried to here. Can you reach him?

384
00:44:30.000 --> 00:44:35.000
Don't let the fire touch you here. Give him to me. I'll

385
00:44:35.000 --> 00:44:40.960
take care of him. Oh,
they're gentle. He's unconscious, a great

386
00:44:42.039 --> 00:44:47.280
deal of force, but he's okay. The fire didn't touch him. No,

387
00:44:47.840 --> 00:44:54.480
he's unconscious, but he's okay.
I can't believe it. Good,

388
00:44:55.159 --> 00:45:00.280
yes, yes, good, good, Charlie. I need you to listen

389
00:45:00.320 --> 00:45:07.679
closely. I'm very badly hurt.
I think I think I can hold on,

390
00:45:07.880 --> 00:45:14.000
but I need you to get me
something from my quarters. Charlie,

391
00:45:14.840 --> 00:45:19.239
Charlie, Charlie, can you hear
me? Why didn't you save me?

392
00:45:19.960 --> 00:45:30.440
I, Charlie, why didn't you
save me? No? Oh, no,

393
00:45:30.280 --> 00:45:37.480
oh no, Charlie, why didn't
you save me? Why? I

394
00:45:37.880 --> 00:45:45.159
try? I wanted to. I
thought you thought we could outpace the documents

395
00:45:45.320 --> 00:45:50.800
in your heart. I did not
realize how deep it and rooted. I

396
00:45:50.880 --> 00:46:00.760
am sorry. I failed you.
I am about to bet your head and

397
00:46:00.840 --> 00:46:06.360
with the broken piece of this stone. And you are apologizing to me because

398
00:46:06.519 --> 00:46:13.960
you are my friend, even if
I am not yours. Please Charley,

399
00:46:14.039 --> 00:46:22.199
listen, I will die, I
promise. I am ready. Whatever has

400
00:46:22.280 --> 00:46:29.480
forced your hand, you have one. I accept it. The last necromancer

401
00:46:29.679 --> 00:46:35.000
felt that will be how it is. But please, Charlie, you cannot

402
00:46:35.800 --> 00:46:43.199
black Fish. I can barely hold
on to him. I have nothing left.

403
00:46:43.599 --> 00:46:49.559
If you strike at me now,
I will consume him on instinct,

404
00:46:49.880 --> 00:46:54.719
without wanting to. It will be
a reflex. And oh no, please,

405
00:46:55.000 --> 00:47:00.679
Charley, please, he is the
best of us. Do not condemn

406
00:47:00.840 --> 00:47:08.440
him to oblivion because of my failings. Just give me time time to let

407
00:47:08.480 --> 00:47:22.079
him go gently, Please don't.
Please, Just give me a few moments

408
00:47:22.440 --> 00:47:30.079
to let asam my other half,
to let him go. Really exactly how

409
00:47:30.320 --> 00:47:36.559
long? Maybe I don't I don't
know, to detach him, let him

410
00:47:36.559 --> 00:47:43.000
go adrift. Maybe five seven minutes, that is all. Oh, thank

411
00:47:43.119 --> 00:47:47.480
you, Charlie, thank you.
That's too long. They'll be coming,

412
00:47:49.119 --> 00:47:52.800
Charlie. Wait if you kill me, If you do this, all that

413
00:47:52.880 --> 00:47:59.039
I have bound will be loosed.
This place will fill with horrid, dangerous

414
00:47:59.119 --> 00:48:06.719
things in. You won't survive it
either. I died almost a year ago.

415
00:48:07.960 --> 00:48:14.519
My soul died the night before you
came for me. When my wall

416
00:48:14.599 --> 00:48:20.559
split open and it looked through.
It stripped me bare, showed me the

417
00:48:20.679 --> 00:48:25.440
dangling marionette corpses you things have made
of us, showed me what happened to

418
00:48:25.480 --> 00:48:32.199
the real world. I've only got
one way out now. Please know you

419
00:48:32.239 --> 00:48:37.920
are my friend. I trust.
Need a few more. Please not like

420
00:48:38.079 --> 00:48:47.679
this. You've had enough time already. As am I I am sorry.

421
00:48:51.800 --> 00:50:16.719
Suck my beautiful high and m