Wal check, check and check. This is the two seventeen Recovery Podcast with
Corey Winfield. You knows as soon as he gives it to her, he's
gonna give her his heart to her too, and we have kids and getting
married. That's too far. It is the twenty six of May twenty twenty
three. My name is Corey Winfield and welcome, so the two seventeen Recovery
Podcast. Special guests. I guess you're not special guests anymore, but I
have Mitch and I have Adam. You guys are joining Adam Stevens. Can
we still be special? M Yeah, but you're just not No, no,
no, you're just getting that. I don't even think you're guests anymore.
We're not guests, but we can be special, right, Well,
I put guests on your websites, so we're gonna talk about today. M
did you guys to upload stuff to it every day? Just kidding? You're
like, how you don't even give us access to it? How we supposed
to do that? That's exactly for my head to build a bridge to China
as well. We'll get right on that too. What else what do you
want us to do? I did you see the guest thing, and I
was like, all right, well, I guess I'll get you. Guys
have been on the podcast before, so I figured I'll throw guests on there.
Don't make us a permanent part of it. I guess. Well,
we go to two seventeen recovery dot com slash Mitchell. It'll pull up Mitchell's
page and you can read his story. You can drop him an email,
and Adams is when didn't you know it to seventeen recovery dot com slash Adam?
No, Adam, have you sent the page off to like family members
and stuff like here's my page? I have not, and I also have
to finish my bio that I just remembered, Yeah, because yours needs to
be replaced. Well, I thought it was pretty good. Story's great,
it's awesome. He's my hero. I pick up poop when he leaves the
yard. I'm gonna shout out to me, like gonna shout out to that
training I did with nim Sass to help me with mine, Like it really
gave me a good messaging strength skills pizzles for learning, you know, And
I used that to build my bio And I was like, hey, this
is real. Let me let me ask you a question about that, because
the messaging training is what you're referring to, and when you first take that,
you're like, oh, yeah, at least I was. It was
like, yeah, we should think about it different. And what we call
things, you know, what we what we call things is what we give
power to kind of you know, like if I wasn't dropped the F bomb,
you know, it's like, did I give power to that bomb?
How did I say it? Was I talking about my FFing cat? Or
do I want to talk about my f and paycheck? You know, like
which one is it? I know that it makes no sense whatsoever. And
I'm really bad at analogies, but that's cool because you know what I'm talking
about because you did the messaging training. Like if you talk about somebody being
in recovery versus oh he's a junkie. Yeah, I mean, that's probably
way better example. But I did notice while we were going into it,
I was like, you, you guys have a pretty good culture around here
of saying I mean, we joke around a lot because we like to have
fun, but you know, when we're serious, we used pretty caring terms.
I was saying, gentle terms. You know when we're talking, but
anyway the proper way to say it. So going into it, I was
like, yeah, I think I've got a pretty good handle on this.
And there was some stuff where I was like, yeah, we'd we already
do that, and then there was other stuff that, you know, I
was like, oh, that really makes sense. And then after that we
went down to U FAM and I remember helping somebody with the tent and the
lady made a comment because it took like six of us to put up her
tent. She's like, how many drunks does it take to put up?
I was like, hey, hey, easy, lady, I don't like
jokes. Yeah, but before that it was I probably want to be even
thought about it, so now you will. And it's funny because this one
lady emailed me from it's some college and what they're trying to do it.
I think it's a great idea. They're offering. It's like online college,
and they're offering these online classes for people and obviously what they do, but
they're also offering like online help and they put in there with substance abuse,
and it's that's how they build their program, you know. And so I
told her this will, it'd be great, and I would love to link
to that to our website, which I will once you change your wording on
everything. I mean that the whole page. It was like landmines, like
stop calling it that, Like, I don't want to send anybody there because
they're going to get the wrong messaging. And I told her how I went
on this rant. I was like, messaging is very important, and especially
it was someone who's just getting into it, and they think that they're the
bad person now because they're at school and they're going to college and they're stressed,
and what do they do when their stress? Will they drink or use
drugs? And well, now they're the bad guy. They're the bad person
for just doing what they would normally do to relieve their stress. But now
it's the problem and it's their problem. They're the bad person. So nope,
I'm not linking that to our website. So change it. And I
didn't hear from her for like six months, and then she finally wrote me
back and she's like, hey, I was just wondering if you look that
over her anymore, And oh, I thought they changed it, So I
went to their website. Nope, so this is how lazy I am.
So instead of like ranting at her again, I just went back and the
other email that I sent her and then just resent it to her. That
was my reply. I was the resentend her. What if she got it
though she was over like, oh that's just resent and they didn't even think
about it. I wanted her to know that I resent it because I'm not.
I mean what, they have nothing else to say that the email let
us sent her for said everything, So I was just thinking, like,
did she put did she connect that in her head? Doesn't sound like that
maybe she would have. So, like, Adam, do you ever out
in the public and you hear people talk about like, oh, yeah,
well the substance abuse is really bad. Or do you hear commercials on the
radio and talk about it. If you're handling substance abuse problems, call loss
and we'll help you out. Yeah, oh yeah, I hear it a
lot. And that's kind of what I was thinking too, Like you know,
um, you know, i'd like I would be taking trainings like that
too and everything. But a lot of it you do kind of pick up
just being around people in recovery too, you know, like a lot of
it I've picked up just from like, oh yeah, like I just hear
it, and so, yeah, I think it is a lot different because
it is like you go to AA meetings and stuff, you get a lot
of little timers. I mean, that's just how they refer to us as
drunk, you know. And it's and I think you know, they do
it in a friends or like a warm way, really in a in a
way in their mind, you know, that's they just call each other drunks,
you know, and everything and good intentions. But that's the thing is
not everybody considers themselves a drunk either, you know what I mean, just
because you're at AA, so I think you know. So yeah, I
think it is really important, especially with like what we do and everything.
You know, there's all different kinds of routes, and yeah, it's not
just one way. So I think that's the big part of it is not
steering people in the wrong direction and how you feel about it, trying to
tell people that there's only one way out, because that's that's not the case.
That's gonna take somebody down the wrong path. Yeah, Like what Adam
does is he doesn't talk for a really long time, but then when he
does he says something very profound. I'm like, hey, that's the first
time I've done it here. Actually, that's that. That That was my
That was my thing in rehab. I didn't talk a whole lot, but
when I did, I was it's because I felt like I had something to
say. You know, it meant something. This time. You guys were
just looking at me. So I had to say something. I had to
respond betting on the hot seat there. Well, I feel bad because we've
talked before, and you're pretty humble with your speech when there's a whole bunch
of people talking at once, and I have to remind myself, Adam's here,
he has an opinion. I appreciate it, so we So I want
to talk about the video we made. But then I was like, oh
no, no, we didn't talk about this because this is actually recovery related.
But I just can't remember what that is. So I'm to the video
next. Yeah, we're having a grand opening here at the two seventeen Recovery
Center that's on June eighth. And we made a little video we recorded let
me think, let's rephrase that. We recorded a little video today and I
don't know, there's worst things you could be doing, right, I mean
true, but looking back at it, and when out and I talked to
Mitchell and the lobby, I sat with him and I was like, dude,
I don't know if that's gonna even fly. Like, I just don't
think Martie's gonna like it. I don't, I don't know. I just
think I think a lot of people be hating on it. And even though
we are joking in the video about some stuff, but like, I just
think that there's a lot of haters out there. Man. I like it.
The idea of it, and this is you're coming from this place to
begin with. Is it's one of our goals here is to have fun and
recovery. And you know I usually charged so much more for my acting skills.
Yeah, I got you on the cheek. Yeah. So Holiday Friday,
I'm gonna be really I'm gonna be real sad if you don't use that
footage personally. I'm going to I just just questioning if it's appropriate material.
Well, strippers are people too, right? Right? Yeah? I think
I don't think it's necessarily offensive. I just think maybe it makes us look
like dumb guys, but we're we are kind of coming. I mean,
right, you know that's what I'm saying. Yeah, I mean that was
that was kind of the point. We're not trying to set the bar too
high, you know, we're definitely not. I don't think it was offensive
anyway. Okay, we're only bagging on mail strippers. Usually they don't get
the brunt of the stigma that guys are giving all these spoilers away. Look
for the video, it'll brown. Watch the blooper reel, you'll appreciate it
more, and then wait for the subsequent ones because we'll probably get better.
Say go yeah, well, I don't know, like just a whole it's
fun video of like what am I supposed to do? Like film you guys
going, Hey, come see us at our grand opening with a jingle?
Yeah you needed two seventeen jingle like, I mean, that's not the one.
Tyrone had one for us at one point. It was like her guitars,
but it was a takeoff of Sanford and Son I think or something like
that. It was pretty hilarious, and Tyrone's right at home going I don't
remember that, but you did, Tyrone. I'll have to see if I
can find it. Thank you for what you do. Tyrone, we love
you. And he came by the other day and he likes to do outreach,
you know, and he was kind of disappointed. He wanted to spend
more time out there doing that this week. And he drove like an hour
in and I think it was out there for like twenty minutes and they were
like, we're done. I know, and I got here. I think
he made a joke about Tyrone and Adam going from Alpina to Lansing today and
I was like, wait, they're doing what I believe And it wasn't what
happened. I don't know what it was. I thought you were talking about
their route that they were taking with the van or something. No. I
think I was saying that Justice was going from Elpinato Lancing. Sorry, well,
miss communicate. It was a coato. It was funny because at first
I was like, they're gonna do what today. That's that's a big day.
And then they came back like thirty minutes later. That would be a
really long shirt for Tyrone. He sleeps a lot, like in the car,
like man, you get him in there and he's worse than Marnie,
Like, not even a mile down the road, he'll just be talking to
you about cheeseburgers. Then you and you're like, whoa dude, And which
was literally really funny because when he was talking to the other day about his
job that he had at GM back in the day, and he said,
he's like Winfield, I'd be out all night, be out all night,
man, doing drugs and you know, I smoke crack whatever, and then
I would have to go to work. And they told me that if I
missed anymore work, I'd be fired. So I would just show up and
I would go in the bathroom room and I would sleep and living with I've
lived with Tyrone, I've driven Tyrone. I know how loud this man's snores.
And I started laughing my ass off because I could just picture Tyrone trying
to hide up in the bathroom. I'm just snoring like a madman, and
like, who are you trying to like hide from, dude, Like,
of course you got fired because he said they caught him sleeping in the bathroom
and they said, no, that's that's not what we're trying to do here,
man. We want you to come to work and work, not come
here and sleep in the bathroom. And I could just imagine him though,
just sitting on the pot and then walking in and just hearing somebody in the
bathroom just just logging it up, you knows on logs. I thought,
that's pretty funny. I've had one job. It was a midnight job back
when I was still in the addiction and I hadn't been diagnosed with my sleeping
stuff yet, my sleeping disability sleep at me yet, and being a single
dad and work like trying to sleep one of my kids at school, and
you know, having a houseful of people that don't care that you work nights,
and you know, that was that was great. Actually made my addiction
a lot worse because I couldn't sleep because of sleep. At the end,
I couldn't sleep because nobody gave a crap that I had to sleep during the
day. And so then that was a problem. And then I'd worked nights
and I got away with the most of it. I got caught a couple
of times, but I got fired from that job for other reasons. There's
a laundry list they could have fired you for. Yeah, snapping on the
job with one of them had a pretty good system. I remember looking back,
I was like, I got away with more than I should have there
mostly naps and looking back to some of that stuff and you're like, how
did I do it? Yeah? How was that not fired a long time
ago? Like that's crazy, But now we have pretty cool job. So
then, like working in the recovery field is something that I find rewarding.
And I don't know, it's just he's just giving back man and Adam,
Like I just kind of figured. I remember one time Adam told me that
he was like, yeah, I think I gotta work in the I gotta
work in the field somehow. I gotta do something in the industry, like
to to be in it, you know, to be in it, in
it, you know, and when you work in it, do you guys
get burnt out? Not me, man, Like, I'm still at the
point where, you know, when I have a chance to mention it,
like that's what I say, is I you know, I'm grateful because I
mean, I don't I don't know what, Like I like you were saying,
that's how I feel it felt about it is living in is going to
make it so much easier to do it, you know. And the most
important thing to me had to be me staying sober and everything and I don't
know, to me what better way, Like, you know, I don't
want to live at rehab, but at the same time, I love the
feeling you have while you're there and everything. And you know, I always
thought of like working there in a place, in that environment and every thing.
It would just make it easier to every day be reminded what you're working
on, you know, because that's the thing you jumped a few times.
I've jumped back into my old life just pretty much the same way, you
know, thinking I just got to get back to where it got it,
back to the routine and everything, and that routine does kick back in and
that leads to the routine of drinking and everything. And yeah, I kind
of lost where I was going with that, but I think that's a decent
ending place. I kind of mentioned that That's what I was talking about earlier
when I was talking about when I quit vaping, and it was like I
was trying I would beat how do I say this? So I went through
this with drinking too, and I would have been sober for a really long
time and then I would have to do something that caused me to like for
example, my job at the vape store That was the first what i'll call
real job that I had since coming out of addiction and getting in getting into
recovery. And one of the things I had to talk with my therapist at
the beginning of that was, I haven't had a job like this since I
was drinking, And how am I gonna go to work, leave work and
then just come home and not stop at a liquor store, Like that's just
what I did every day. That was part of my routine, and it
felt like going into it, it was just gonna happen again, like that
just had to be a part of it. She's like, well, you
haven't done it yet, so you know, and she talked me through it.
So it ended up not being as big of a thing. But then
that feeling came back trying to quit nicotine, and I would do something like
get in the car, I'd want to hit my vape, and I'd want
to go to bed, I'd want to hit my vape one last time.
Wake up in the morning, I'd want to hit my vape. It's like
I had to conquer each one of those things over and over again for a
few days until they started to go away. So that's a thing what are
your thoughts on nicotine harm reduction? Nicotine harm reduction. Yeah, it's harm
reduction. It's because here's the thing about the harm reduction that I just love
is, first of all the things that I was told about, it was
they want to pass out needles because it's too expensive to cure hepatitis. Like
they don't care about people, They just want to stop paying for them.
That's the vibe I got. And they're talking to I got, so I
was like, okay, cool. And then like there's some stuff online that
you can go read and it'll tell you like this is how you're supposed to
feel, and this is what you're supposed to do. But we're all individuals.
We all think and feel our own ways. But when it comes to
somebody who wants to get off of cigarettes, and if you go from cigarettes
to vape, oh hell to the no. Not in Michigan. No,
no, no, you are a piece of shit. And actually that is
harm reduction. Now. Is vaping good for me? No? Neither's eating
all that ice cream? You know, Like I make bad, bad choices
every single day. But going from cigarettes to vaping, I will tell you
I don't smell, I don't cough like a long up every morning. I
don't like just just that that happened when I smoked. That doesn't happen now
now again, is it good for me? No? But is it a
harm reduction absolute fricking lutely yes. But if you talk to like harm reduction
companies, and there's one in Michigan, harm Reduction Michigan, you talk to
them about it, and then my uh dealings with this Derek guy about it.
He was like, nope, vyping stupid, Nope, And well they
do all the other harm reduction, but they won't do this, you know.
And I know the governor was getting money from, you know, a
tobacco company guy, and so she was anti vaping. Go whitmer lover a
sarcasm there if you couldn't pick that up. But um, but it just
it just kind of like surprises me. But it doesn't because at the end
of the day, it's all about money and if we really want to hurt
the government again, not that I want you to hurt the government, but
if you really ever just like, I've had enough of this politics crap,
quit smoking, quick gambling, quit drinking. There you go for a month,
everybody do that well, it wants yep, and you'll find out how
much the government wants you to smoke, and how much they want you to
gamble, and how much they want you to drink. I had to kind
of get over some feelings of being a hypocrite because somebody was talking to me
about how they really liked the taste of beer so over once in a while
they'll go out and get non alcoholic beer. And I was like, well,
that's walking a really thin tight rope. I feel like you're like one
a little step away from just falling back in it. And then they were
like, well, I figure it's it's like harm reduction. In harm reduction,
in one way, it feels kind of icky. It doesn't feel great.
It's like it kind of feels like a cop out. But I will
say that to quit nicotine, I did use harm reduction. I'd call it
long term harm reduction. Like I quit smoking and went to vaping, and
I just did that forever because I've had the same results that you did.
Like, it wasn't good for me, but it was so much better than
smoking was. I didn't have any of the breathing issues, and that was
the biggest issue for me, and that's how I had the breathing issues,
because I'm a big guy too, and I had some hard issues back in
the day. But it went from like one hundred percent of an issue to
like five percent of an issue. They were still there a little bit,
but barely. And then to quit the vaping eventually years later, I ended
up just going off the nicotine but staying on the vaping because I didn't realize,
well I kind of realized this, but I didn't realize how bad it
was. I was addicted to just the act of vaping, I think just
as much, maybe more, but at least just as much as the nicotine
itself. So betting able to step that down, getting off the nicotine for
a week and then getting off the vaping, you know, doing it in
two steps. I think that helped. I was because that one day that
I got off both, I wanted to kill all you guys for no reason.
You did nothing to me that day, and I just all I can
imagine with my hands around your neck, you know. The next day I
got to know nicotine vape, and it's like fifty percent of all of this
hatred that bubbled up inside me. I didn't know who existed was gone.
That's nice, but you did that. But so I don't know how to
about the harm reductions, like because it worked for me with that, but
I don't feel like buying people needles is going to help anybody. Yeah,
I don't know. Maybe it'll help somebody not get sick. Yeah, they
I don't know. They said that if all just because someone's drinking, and
so the stuff that we have to go through is very confusing, and you're
about to go through the recovery coach training but you know, and it might
have changed from the one that I've taken. I'm not sure, but they
were like, look, you know, if someone and and that's the thing,
like you're a recovery coach. You're trying to be a recovery coach.
Amy a recovery coach, Like it's not your job to judge people. You
know, if someone drinks that day and then college you the next day and
says, hey man, I need help, Like we're not gonna be like
no, because you drink your das drugs, you're out of here, buddy.
That's not what we do. You know, that's complete, that's not
what we do. So you know, we just help the people where we
can and where they meet them, where they're at. But sometimes they'll say,
like, look, man, like this guy was drinking this much and
now he's drinking this much. I mean, end result, he's drunk,
and I'm like, yeah, but I really don't want to talk to a
drunk person. My mom told me a long time ago that it's pointless,
like if somebody's like hammered drunk, you can't get through to them. Nothing
you stay will ever make sense and they're always going to be right in their
mind. And you know, just she's like she learned from me dealing with
me. Well, it never worked for me either, because I tried that,
you know, well maybe I can switch this up or only drink half
pints or only drink you know, lower proof, and it didn't really matter.
Every time I cut down, it's like the pathway found a way too
more than I was before. So it's very temporary, and I mean,
I don't think everybody's like that. Maybe it works for somebody, but I
feel I'll tell people. The same thing about AA meetings is I think they're
great. I think they work for some people, but they just that didn't
work for me. So maybe that's the same case. Maybe there is something
to harm reduction. Maybe they're giving it too much energy. Maybe it helps
less people than they think it does. Maybe it helps more and we're just
not doing enough. I don't know. I don't have that answer. I'm
willing to talk to If anybody out there and wants to talk to me about
it, go to two seventeen recovery dot com slash Mitchell hit me up on
an email and we can have a conversation about it. Because it's just not
something I know enough about. I have feelings about it, but I have
no idea if my feelings are right right although, and that's the thing,
like I just feel like sometimes they tell us, Nope, this is what
you have to believe. This is what everybody has to believe. And again
I just don't. I just don't believe that's the case. Like the dude
from Harm Reduction, that Derek guy, he doesn't like people who vape.
He has every right, he's has every right to think that, you know.
But I just thumb it out there because I think that vaping is a
harm reduction, but yet it's not looked at it like that. And I
know there are a few companies that are trying to get it past as harm
reduction, and I think it should, you know, but well never in
Michigan. I don't think when Whitmer's in office. I think when she leaves,
it will probably help out. That's it in the beginning too, though.
Yeah, and it's just like that went away. I don't I don't
know how they got that to go away because there so you can't say that
because there's not enough evidence. Well there's not enough evidence the other way either,
Yeah, to say that it's not so. And I don't know.
We can go on about this and I don't want to because it just gets
me fired up. Man. I want to talk about something that happened to
me yesterday. If we got time. It's a little bit of a of
a switch. But it was really cool. Um, I got to take
my first recovery to treatment and it was a little bit of an adventure.
She was great. Um, we you know, had a good conversation there
and back. I got to talk to somebody that was going into detox.
That was a really great conversation and it really it kind of took me back
to some places that I've been. But the biggest thing was where I took
this person to treatment was right in the heart of some of the trauma from
my past, and I didn't realize. I've been working really hard through my
spirituality and just personal growth and my recovery to deal with some of that,
and I thought a lot of what I started to experience yesterday was already taken
care of. And I started to dip into some of the hatred for a
certain person in my past that I had in bitterness because of things that they
had done to me sexual relationship. I will neither confirm nor deny, but
um, and it took me a little bit. I just kind of fell
into that, that that hat and that those those negative feelings like a pit
Yeah, um, where were the where were the sound effects when we needed
a cheer earlier? Man? But anyway, I was able to be self
aware enough, like I it, these negative feelings hit me and I was
on the drive back, and I was able to be self aware enough to
use some of the new coping mechanisms that I've learned. Man, So like
send text messages to your boss. Well that was this was after that complaining
about the death trap he sent me in. Um, I wouldn't recommend that
hoping skill for other people listening out there. No, this was this was
other things. Uh, I wondered if you still had that. Um,
I've been using that all over the place now, that's like my sign off.
But anyway, I was able to do the good things that I've learned
to get myself out of it, and I feel like I grew from it.
And then I went to a meeting last night and I got to share
that, and everybody really really enjoyed the story about how I had went through
this tough thing. I used something that I learned in recovery and kind of
and grew from it and it was a good thing. And in the end,
like that or they were like, thanks for sharing that. That's great
that you're vulnerable and that you opened up to everybody. Let's say it was
the opposite of that. They were yeah, they were happy about it.
Oh yeah, yeah, they were like yeah that good. No, No,
They're like, that is awesome, that's great, thank you for sharing
that. Like that makes a lot of sense. And somebody was like,
I have never thought about it that way. And there's a lot of other
cool thing is that happened at that meeting, But that was just a really
good one and I got to leave there with kind of a bigger sense of
purpose and it was it was cool yesterday. It was a good day I
had. I got grumpy in it and said some things to my boss I
probably shouldn't, but he has been pretty gracious with me and moved on and
it ended up good. So maybe he cares about your concerns. That's that's
funny, isn't it. It's probably the chances of that. So no,
I care when Martie makes me dang. Since we got what we got,
like a truth serum going on here, I answering no tough questions, no,
but like I learned something that well, I know, we guys probably
want to wrap it up and go home, but like I'm still paying you
for the next couple minutes. Just hang out, listen to me talk.
But there was the thing we had to go to in Plymouth for Marnie's father,
and he was a lawyer for fifty years, and the Bar Association of
Michigan was having like this luncheon for them, like people that had fifty years,
you know, and you walked to the bar the Bar Association. Yeah,
yeah, I passed the bar. Her dad like passed the bar and
he is actually in recovery too, like fifteen years and I think now,
So he was having that. And it was all the way in Plymouth,
which is like four hours from here, and it was at noons. We
had to leave early on Thursday to get there. And we get there and
it's about two hours and then we were posted to drive back. But I
think Justin had told me, Man, just pack your bag and stay there.
So I was like, man, we're gonna do this and this because
I still had a bunch of things I had to do for work, you
know, And I was like, how the hell, Like I'm gonna drive
eight hours through the day, which I've done before, sure, but then
I still have about four hours of work to do, important work that like
if I don't do, then we don't we don't eat, you know.
So it's not like just like, yeah, well maybe I'll get to that
later. It's like, no, this has to be done at this time
or else. So we ended up staying there. But but I was given
an out. Marnie said, Honey, I know you have a lot of
things to do tomorrow. You don't have to go with me. And I
sidestep that bear trap? Is there no way not falling for that one?
I'm going with you, you know, And yeah I did. I mean
they the selfish part of me wanted to go, okay, cool, see
you when you're gonna be home by eight o'clock. Okay cool? You know,
like that's the selfish part of me wanted to do that, you know,
because I'm like, man, I'll go in, dick around at work
or whatever and get my stuff done up plenty of time then and then what
am I gonna do? A fly to drone or something or I don't know,
just that that selfish part of me though, And when you're in early
recovery, it maybe it takes longer for that stuff to kind of stink in
that You have to choose the right you have to make the right choice sometimes,
and that's not always the choice you want. You mean to tell me
that, Well, I was complaining to you about what was frustrating about my
day yesterday, that you were having a day yesterday. You have feelings too,
And I told Marny, I was like, no, that's what I
thought. Yeah, not everybody's still working on them looking for him, but
no, it was one of those situations though that I told her, I
was like, look, this will be a character builder because when I get
stressed, I get grump being angry, and I think that's a normal reaction.
Though before I would go drink when I got stressed, but now I
don't do that, so it's like er. But I'm still trying to figure
that out. And I told her, I was like, it'll be a
character builder for me, you know, like I'll have some pressure and I'll
have to get this stuff done at a certain time, but you know,
there's there's other ways to do it. And I can still go with you
and be with you when you support your father and when you get stressed.
Um it it becomes a thing where I have to watch what I say.
It's a exercise for both of us because codependency going on here. Sometimes you
some of the things you say when you're frustrated, and I don't think i've
been able to I'm glad we're doing this on a podcast. Yeah, are
kind of funny. Bye, um Man, I'm gonna have to listen to
podcast just so I can hear the sound effect. That's right. We should
just sit really close to each other and pull it out and then you know
we can get right. I think we're doing that stuff anyway. We do
have the door closed in my office, but when I get sitting close and
pulling it out, that's not like your positions you said earlier. While we
were filming things, We're like, wait a minute, what are we film
me? When you went into the bathroom real quick, You're like, hold
on, give me a minute. See in there, come out like powder.
I'm like, you don't powder your balls, man, I'm telling you
you don't do that. How's another conversation we had the other day. But
you know, it's just it's great. Like I'll have to be like because
I want to say something because a lot of times we joke around with each
other. But I'm like, no, he's actually frustrated right now, keep
your mouth shut. Yeah yeah, that's dude. Yeah, some things that
just drives me nuts. But I don't know, man, it's part of
it, you know, and it's part of learning and part of growing.
But I just was proud of myself that I could sidestep the bear trap because
if I'd have been like, okay, and this is a message for all
guys. The bear traps are set. They're out there. They're easy.
Here you go walking on this road. Yeah, there's there's a bear chapter.
You're gonna stop in it. And then it's then what it's gonna be
like. You know, then you're gonna be really hate in life. And
there's a lot of things I like, and that if my wife isn't happy,
then them things don't happen, you know I'm saying. So I'm just
saying that I want to make her happy, and at the same time it
might not be what I want to be doing with my time, but she
is my wife and I have to go do those things. Welcome to being
married, I know that's what some guys saying right now. He's like,
we're going to be a married sucker. I hate it when people do that.
Added well, yeah, or talked down about their marriage. Well,
I was saying, it's probably some guy who would you don't do that,
But some fifth year old guy has like three or four twenty eight year old
girlfriends. And my dad was that way, and I've known other people like,
well, you're know, like, how's it going? You're like,
what are your old wife for her? And I'm just like, well,
why are you if this is such a pain in your ass? Why are
you doing this? You know? You just you hit a thing where when
people bring it up, it's just like one of those things for me,
like there are people out there that want to have that relationship and you're shitting
on it right now. So you didn't do that, I'm just gonna stop.
Yeah. I kind of did that about Tuesday night when I was talking
about the stream center, but I had some jokes to go with it.
I'm like, well, I love being married all the stuff you gotta do.
But I was kind of telling them that you have to do the stuff
you don't want to do, And that was my whole kind of point with
that. You gotta be that with those guys though. Yeah, I haven't
figured out how to reach them yet. You do it really good sometimes,
like two weeks show it was horrible. Then this last week though it was
good. That was another day. I was just off that night. You
know, you want to go and I'm like, I just want to go
home and go to bed. I don't know what. It was a full
Oh. That was the day that I had to step out of my comfort
zone for you again. Again, we weren't sitting close pulling anything out like
that. Nobody was videotaping either. No, we never videotaped those. No.
Yeah, I just heard a lot of excuses of why something couldn't get
done, and it's like, dude, look man, like it can it
can't get done, you know. And my whole thing was, there weren't
excuses why something couldn't get done. There were reasons why I had already done
it, but not in person. But I just was waiting for the results
of it to come back. You're like, yeah, it's not fast enough.
You need to figure it out further. And I'm like, my whole
thing was, it's like, okay, so the excuses were a thing I
did in addiction, and so I don't do that anymore. And so I
thought I had already done well, yeah, I'm trying not to do that.
I thought I already made took those steps. And then you're like,
yep, not good enough. So whatever I went, I went full.
I went all the way through it and pushed through, proved that I can
do it. So and that felt good at the end of the day too.
You're like, no, I was in a really bad mood. By
the end of the day, it felt good. Like the next day after
I got some rust. You're like, wow, cool, I got that
done, Like that's great. Yeah, And it was cool because I got
it done in the expiration dates further back then it would have been, and
there were there were good things about it, but I was so drained by
the end of the day and just having to do things that I didn't like
to do. And I need to have gratitude about it because it's it's a
growing thing and thanking you for pushing me. And I kind of did through
gritted teeth. I was like, thank you because it was a growing experience
and I appreciate you pushing me. Just post my limits so I can exp
but I didn't feel it yet when I said it, and I was trying
to get there. So yeah, it's I can't hurt you, you know,
you can still do it. But it's just it's hard, though,
to do those things you don't want to do. That's why I had to
do it again. I was like, okay, and then you do them
and you're like, oh, that wasn't so bad, you know. And
Marty tried to telling me that today when I had to deal with the state,
Oh, dude, some so much though in different directions and yeah,
this is like the unemployment insurance or whatever that they automatically take from everybody,
you know, Like it's not like I'm like, hey, let me take
some of that, but no, they're like we're taking this. And I'm
like okay. Yeah. So they're like, oh, you got to report
on that, and I was like, yeah, but you guys didn't let
me set up my password and or something an email and let say, I
know, they told me I couldn't have a number. Then they gave me
a number, so I used it and they're like, oh, yeah,
wrong number. And I'm like, well, who we've been paying? Then,
you know, like who's got that money? They're a little lepricrown running
around there, and they're the unemployment tree. I don't know, like Whittner's
out there with a little lepricrown run around money. Yeah, you probably do.
But so yeah, I so I had to deal with that. And
then she's all like see, doesn't that feel good to deal with that and
get it over with? And I was like, just go chuckle, that's
what we're not done yet. That was like one phone call. That one's
yeah, now I feel carsick. So which one's my fault. I'm gonna
go film some videos. Oh but for real though, look at our grand
opening video or look for it. It'll be coming soon. And I'm glad
we did that. It was fun and I think the bloopers are going to
be the best part of it, all of them. They always are at
everything. You'll get to see how much fun we're having. We're not having.
We get to have some fun push, like I said, pushing past
those boundaries. Yeah. But if you want to talk harm production, you
reach out to Mitchell at two seventeen recovery dot com is page to seventeen recovery
dot com slash Mitchell. It's a conversation I want to have. If you
want to talk about feelings, then that would be with Adam Stevens. It's
two seventeen recovery dot com slash Adam and Adam at two seventeen recovery dot com
is his email. Hi. Yeah, I want to talk videos. What's
up Justin? Do you want to buy shirts justin that in the video somewhere?
Yeah? We should. I wish we had a video of that.
We're talking about the live breaks we were doing with the wireless in Justin you
fam, Yeah, it's inappropriate timing, which but it was perfect timing,
like you couldn't play it perfectly inappropriate. Oh that's yeah, you're helping people
and Grant, okay, you want to buy shirt? That was his whole
goal was to at least sell a certain amount of shirts. It's like,
this girl's talking too long, all that stuff you're telling me, that's awesome,
we want buy shirt? I mean, and it is in all fairness.
It was like that one lady. I told him. I was like,
look, you're gonna go get some either grab that stuff out of the
trash or help her put it in the trash. It was the one that
got me though. It was the lady she didn't even want a shirt.
She wanted to give us money. Yeah, and she was awesome too,
And he's just like, you want to I think that was that the third
or fourth one ladea. I was trying to talk to people, and so
I wasn't paying attention. I kept looking over in between people, and I'd
catch a little bits of the lady putting boxes in the trash, and then
then this other lady and she did. She was saying some really profound things
about recovery. And then you know she wanted and all right, sure that's
a great yeah, because you'll be able to hear exactly what he says on
what day was that last Thursday? Yeah, yeah, week ago? Yeah
yeah, it was the one that Adam was on. So if you find
on our app or on YouTube or however you listen on our website, find
the one with Corey, Adam and Justin on the wireless. It's like the
second or third one from you fam. Yeah, look for that and enjoy
it and we'll talk to you. I don't know. Enjoy the holiday weekend.
We'll talk to you when we talk to you. Hye bye bye are
you saying bye again? Bye? Stop with Mitchell? Bye? Oh Christ
the budon I have a problem. Thanks for listening to the two seventeen Recovery
Podcast. We hope you come back for our next episode.