Brown brown brown brown, brown brown and brown bo brown brown brown bound.
Move over, Tom Manda. We're officially better musicians than than Tom Manda.
You can tell tell your friends we're back Episode sixty one. We're sept sectagenarians.
Septics sect sectagenarians. Don't call us sextatagenarians. That's you se seven seven
right, Yeah, sex sex is six sex sectagenarians, sextagenarians. Yeah.
Set new Genius Spanish as well. It's been it's been a quick summer.
One week, two weeks. We had an episode. I forgot the rest
of the lyrics. An episode. We got quite a few emails. Oh
have you? I'm assuming you guys have come across some better answers to our
tub question now that have people? We got a lot of emails. There
were a couple of occurring answers, a lot of cotton candy. Yeah.
Importantly, I was at a poker game with my entire family last night and
my sister, who does not play video games or listening to video game podcast,
brought it up. She saw the video pop up on Instagram and she
posed it to the whole family and said all of us have to answer,
and it was a unanimous yes. We would eat the poop. Oh,
you're talking about Mary and I. Mary and I don't ever need that much
money where we grew up rich kids. We have to clarify because that's not
true. And the whole point is that, like we have been misconstrued.
And no, no, no, no, no no no, I'm not
doing people. We're not We're not I'm not giving them oxygen. Well,
I want to talk about the food. I'm talking about the food just because
one hundred and twenty five k is nothing to you high rollers. Some of
us real Americans here are struggling and I could use one hundred and twenty five
day. I don't what food, Okay, So a lot of people said
cotton candy. To Jake's credit, while he was editing the episode, long
before any of these emails rolled in, he did DM me saying cotton candy
is the right answer. A man said's popcorn. A lot of people found
it funny that we I just automatically assumed that we would be naked. I
think so, I mean, yeah, I think be less uncomfortable if we
were. Imagine getting like mac and cheese out of your jeans. Yeah,
it's just gonna weigh you down. You're gonna feel like you weren't a wet
shirt. You ever going? You ever wrote an amusement park and you take
one of the water rides and you're just fully dressed for a normal amusement park,
not the water park, but there's a water ride and you just get
absolutely slashed and you got to walk around with the squishy socks and the heavy
shirts. That's not good. It's not fun. Someone else mentioned oranges because
they have a natural casing that would protect the food part from until you're ready.
Yeah, you still have to poop, right, but at least it
doesn't fix that. Nothing's gonna fix that. I guess things kind of fix
that unless you have to eat the peels too. But yeah, cotton candies
a good answer. We got through a lot of emails, like doing the
math of how many bags of Skittles it would take. It was like,
I think it's like one hundred twenty You would have to eat one hundred twenty
three party size bags. Party size is that big? There's like families maybe
family size. Yeah, his family one of the ones that has like the
fucking zip block in there because they assume no one's that we're going to finish
it, and you're not gonna do this in one sitting. Yeah, okay,
that seems like too much Skittles. Anytime Candy has a zip block bag,
that's Candy saying don't fucking eat this all at once. It's candy underestimating
me. And my result is what I think that has. But yeah,
we realized that, we learned that Mary Mary sneezes at one hundred and twenty
five K. I guess is the lesson we all learn. Well you too,
like me. Look, I'm the only one who sees the value of
dollar around here. HI would like one hundred and twenty five K. I
just value not eating poop a little higher. Yeah, oh, Ivory Tower,
Yeah, my not eating poop tower. You up on your high horse
without poop in your stomach? Year. Yeah. And Dan the king of
shit eating City. Look, I'm just here to earn an honest buck.
That's not an honest buck, that's a poop buck. That's some gross bus.
Some other big developments I saw Oppenheimer. Finally, Lincoln Square in New
York has been booked solid. I like that movie quite a bit. I
loved it. It's I mean this as a compliment and I say, this
is someone who does like Christopher Nolan's movies a lot. There were times during
that movie when I actually forgot it was a Christopher Nolan movie and it was
similar to dun Kirk, although Dunkirk still had some of his quirks, like
all those like showy kind of time travel stuff until a lot of the sound
stuff going on too, a lot of like hey, check out what I'm
doing with my sound here that yeah, and like until Hans Zimmer's score would
creep back. I was like, oh, right, this is a Christopher
Nolan movie. And I do think it dragged in some parts, but by
and large I liked it a lot. I thought it was great. So
the movie's really long. And as I was sitting down with my popcorn and
my big corona because the movie theater I went to you could get one giant
can of beer those like tall boys. So I had a huge corona and
a huge popcorn, and my buddy sat next to me and goes, now,
I heard there's a scene where the brother comes in to give Oppenheimer his
new badge. When that happens, you can go pe because it's a good
like three to four minutes where nothing really happens, And I said, I'm
glad you told me that, because I probably will need to pe in this
experience. But my response to you, Nolan is, if there is any
portion of this film in which I can leave and p and nothing is really
lost or gained, why is your movie so fucking long? Like, just
don't have the scene where the brother gives him the badge or an intermission like
it did that, did it? Or whatever? All these movies don't need
to be three hours. I think my major point is is like, sure,
Brake would be nice so that I can pee, but they don't need
to be this long. And that's more and more frequent now. I think
Mission Impossible was close to that. Do you remember in the early days of
the iOS app store it wasn't the first iPhone. I think it was the
second one, the three G one where the app store launched it and one
of the most popular apps at the time. We had a bunch of just
like gimmick like you know, would make it look like you're drinking a beer
or here's like a little ball rolling thing. But there was one called run
P and it was specifically supposed to be for any movie in the theater.
It would tell you specific time stamps. It was like user submitted stuff of
like places, times to pe, so you could like check beforehand and shee
like, oh okay, so at this time, same this time, same
this. You can set it to like vibrate your phone or something there okay
and go p real quick. Yeah. Yeah, there's a website now.
I forget the name of it. I thought. I assumed that's where Mary's
friend got the time to do that. The spoiler free image, spoiler free
scenes or whatever, it's like, hey, without spoiling it, there's a
scene where X does this. That's all say, go to the bathroom then,
and you can come back without missing crucial plot details. Which, yeah,
I think that movie is a bit too long. I thought. At
least Irishman came out like on a streaming service and I was at home.
Yeah, but I TMNT with the streaming service. I think that would be
a really great movie to watch in the sanctity of my home TMNT. I
absolutely im plan on watching it. I just don't know if I have to
see it in a theater where it's like this is my personal opinion. Both
Barbie and Oppenheimer are great theater experiences for very different reasons. Oppenheimer has excellent
excellent audio design, I mean some of the best in the business, and
being able to hear that in the theater and hear the way that they constructed
the audio to create tension or build a moment phenomenal in a theater that I
don't. I don't think most home experiences could replicate Barbie. You should see
in theaters because of the theatre of the entire experience. All the people in
pink, all the women like freaking out at the end and being like I
say that all the time, like I've been gas lit my whole life,
Like all the kids like loving the experience of seeing their idol on the big
both of them. Theater theater experiences also visually Barbie. I saw Barbie a
few days ago and fucking loved it. Visually. All the stuff specifically like
in Barbie Land, was so visually like I feel like just through osmosis,
even if, like you know, I never had Barbies or know anything about
the brand or anything, but like I feel like you would see those commercials
if you're watching something Nickelodeon, where it's like, you know, the doll
floating down from the top to the bottom, and just knowing how they stand
and bend and stuff. It's like they seem to really take a lot of
care with that. And they obviously used some CGI throughout it. There's lots
of opportunities where you'll be like, that's CGI. But you can also tell
the amount of effort they put into physical sets, and that is valuable and
something you see less and less of, especially with all these Marvel films.
You can just tell that someone's essentially in a green box and then they're painting
everything in this Mark, this Barbie film. Those houses are real, those
sets are real. When they make a little joke about a physical on set,
it's real she's holding in her hand. They do that a lot throughout
the sequence of this movie. And I think practical effects live sets. I
just think I'm a fan of that. Maybe that's a product of our age
or something, but I really appreciate and find the humor and physical prop comedy
as opposed to using CGI. Yeah, and the thing that really blew me.
First of all, it was hilarious. I did not expect it to
be as funny as it was, but I was like laughing all the whole
opening thing. I won't spoil it for Mike, but the whole opening thing
with like spelling out the P I n K and all that stuff was killing
me. And like the thoughts of you know, anxious thoughts and things like
that. We're really interesting, but I just you know, we've all worked
for giant corporations before, and giant corporations like to play things safe, you
know. I remember like at w E, they were so protective of the
brand and their IP and everything has to go through a million things of approval
and everything that's sanded down and nothing says or does anything by the end.
It's just the homogenized goop that comes out of the wrestle factory. Like for
Mattel to take Barbie, which is obviously like I know, they have a
bunch of hot wheels and all sorts of stuff, but like Barbie, I
feel like it's this like iconic, iconic. Okay, you don't want to
mess with her image. You probably don't want to like mess with the Mattel
brand. And they they they do roll Mattel in dog shit, that whole
thing when they show the office and it's just this drabbed thing with these cubicles
is great cubicles and the CEO stuff and all the like this the parody stuff
like you Will Farrell and the CEO stuff and all the mid like it is
like, I can't I didn't know he was. He's in the credits.
He's in the credits. Wait wait, how would I know he's in the
credits if I haven't seen the movie yet? Wells and stuff trailers, he's
an every trailer. Yeah, that's the bar for a spoiler. Now there's
actors that are in the movie. That's insane. Okay, hold on a
second, fuck both of you. I have the least I give a shit
about spoilers, the least of anybody I know. I was just saying,
like, if it's a cameo the pops up, don't tell me, no,
no, no, he is like a big role in Mike scot one
hundred and twenty five k. And if you tell him what actors were lead
in a film? Yeah, well okay, well he's not a lead in
the film, so that joke doesn't work. So jokes on you if I
answer that it's a spoiler. That's the twist of Barbie is that Will Ferrell
isn't the lead. He's main, he's the main care. It's actually all
about well would. It's crazy how critical they are of just Mattel's history of
the place Barbie has, you know, the spot that toy has played in
a lot of girls lives growing up and everything. It's highly fucking critical the
whole. They clearly we're given a huge level of creative control when writing this,
and I have to respect that. I also feel like I wonder if
the executives of Mattel are going to get the wrong idea from this movie because
it's made a billion fucking dollars that like they've already like greenlit seventeen o.
They're like, oh no, in Hot Wheels movies and stuff, it's like
this magic. This is like had say over Greta Gerwig being attached, I
would imagine, right, I heard that, So Robbie got brought on,
and she was brought on as a producer and star and she was the one
who pushed for Greta Gerwig because she had worked with her own Pretty Women,
is what I Yeah, But like at some point someone at Mattel must have
signed off on Greta Gerwig doing it and Naven the freedom because like you do
like five minutes of research on Greta Gerwig. You know she's borderline art house.
She's not going to make a straight Barbie movie, which thank god,
because it's a fucking fascinating, awesome, hilarious movie that, like, I
just can't believe that came out of Mattel approving this thing that actually has things
to say and it does it well and a man, I was, I
loved it. I think it's a good reaction. I'm glad to hear you
say that I had that action too, which is like what a fever dream,
Like what a crazy thing that they got through the door at all.
Obviously, from scripting to shooting it to editing, it was just such a
fever dream of a film that they tried to get through. And I think
what I hope Hollywood takes from this, and I don't think this will happen,
but what I hope the lesson is is being experimental with beloved brands is
good. Doing what we don't expect, Trying the unknown is what we're hoping
for, and I genuinely believe. I know, I'm like, I'm pretty
hard on Marvel, but it's like after the generation where we have come to
expect all of the same stuff from these films that you could. I could.
They're practically right themselves, and you kind of know the process and what's
going to happen in these scripts. They gave us a film where you had
no idea what would ever happen next, and if you tried, you were
absolutely wrong because he just kept changing and mixing it up and surprising you.
And I think that's great. I hope that's what people take from this.
I also think we should hopefully see more like female focus stories, like female
directors, female lead It's more like films like this is hopefully a really nice
direction, and so I think it's a huge win for society. We should
all go see it and support it. But I criticized the film as well.
I think it was hard to follow, and I think some of the
message stuff in the back half it's a little all over the place, like
wait, hang on, what's happening? Like, Yeah, there's I think
everybody complex at times for what it is. Yeah, they just tried to
do a lot. There's like eight messages that they try to cram home to
the audiences. And I feel bad for any young children that see that film
because I saw a bunch of like little girls in my showing and they were
like, what is going on? This film is not for kids. It
doesn't make sense. It's got way too many complex moving parts for like young
kids to understand and ink Disney, I would say one thing, Mike,
I won't tell you what it is, but there's a part you're gonna love
where Ken goes outside of his bubble and basically gets inspiration for his entire life
and fashion sense based off just seeing something. And I malready know what I'm
referring to, Wait, say it one more time. What Ken bases his
new fashion sense on when he Okay, he just sees a couple images and
bases his entire persona. I'm thinking of no Hoo hanks bloodborne outfit from a
Pinnacle of Men. Really, really, you really can't beat no Hank.
Yeah, we're really excited see it. I mean, I'll have seen it
by time people hear this, but seeing it tomorrow, I'm interested in what
you say about it and like your ear takes on it. Speaking of one
other movie that's in theaters, uh, I learned recently that Amanda had never
seen or at least remembers seeing any of the Mission Impossibles that last season you
were episode weren't you going through all of them or something? Yea beginning we
are. We're finally into I mean it's taken us a bit because we're we've
been busy, but we're finally about to this weekend, gonna watch start the
New Era. Whatever you want, like Full four. I just watched three
last night. I like three more than I remember actually with Philip Stimore Hoffman.
Philip Hoffman is great. The rest is a little messy, but yeah,
he can't say that film. I don't remember ever seeing Mission Impossible two,
like, oh yeah, here, I remember seeing now. I So
one was cool because it was like, you know, like it was pretty
like nostalgic in nineties, like grainy vhs or Intrigue, you know, spy
stuff. Yeah, and then mister Wu come in. Yeah. So and
then all of a sudden it's like a John Wu film. And I was
like, and I know, like jj abrams debut was three. That was
jj abrams first movie was Mission Impossible three, which is crazy, and then
who did four before McQuary came in too. It might be it was Road
Nation four. No, that was fine. Those protocols for right, it
might be Christopher McQuary because he's he's basically he's basically Brad Bird who just did
what did Bradbird just don like this movie guy? This last year, I
know Bredbird just did something? Was it? Bat Man? Before I dive
into Mission Impossible too, he story four The Incredibles to Okay, a bunch
of finding Okay, all good movies though, So I saw it was a
John wu film and I was like, wait a minute, hold on a
second, and I was an Amanda's scene face Off, and I was like,
that's the guy who did face Off. I do not remember him doing
a Mission Impossible movie. And then turns out, if you are rewatching the
movies like we are, and you don't want too to be from ninety seven
to be spoiled turned off the next ten seconds the first scene, he rips
off some his Tom Cruise's face to reveal the villain. And obviously there was
face changing stuff in the first movie, like light stuff, right the second
one they go all out with it. And then I looked up and I
was like, he did this movie three years after Face Off, if I'm
not mistaken, or three years okay? So maybe I'm mistaken it maybe a
Mission Impossible two is two thousand, let me see, so that sounds right.
Just continued he just continued doing face swapping movies. But in like and
of course Mission Possible two was not like the peak of popularity for that movie
series, but it was already a TV show. Tom Cruise is a big
thing, so it wasn't a small movie. I mean, I remember when
It's coming out, you know it was a big movie. I remember that
Metallica song was like for the movie. It featured video that was kind of
like the pinnacle of his career, Like that was tight, wasn't it?
Ninety seven? No, not the pinnacle. He was definitely like big though.
Yeah it wasn't big for three decades, but he was huge then.
And John Loui was coming off Faceoff and he did wind Talkers after that.
You might have been coming He came right off the Faceoffs. Face Off was
ninety seven, the Broken Air and ninety six that was is big, like
us coming out party based off ninety seven, and they give him a big
time Mission I Possible too, Like I remember I was I was sixteen when
am I two came out, and like that was a big fucking like marketing
tie in, like it wasn't like a tiny little movie by any means.
Yeah, I don't mean if I at any point said it was a tiny
movie. In fact, I don't think I did say it's hard house.
It's hard house. No, I'm saying it's all the more. It's all
the funnier that they give the second movie to John Woo when the last movie
he made was just this or you know, one of the you know,
face off was the surrealistic actor swapping and swapping back and swapping like I don't
even know how you described that like for a mainstream Hollywood action movie. It
was just fucking insane. Yeah, And I couldn't believe it. And then
there were points way early in the movie during the rock climbing scene where I
was like, oh, this already feels like a John wu movie, Like
when he gets the glasses and blow up. But before that, when they
shoot the guy from the helicopter shoots the message at him with that like rocket
thing, he's got that like like that smile on it. It's like the
most of the group are like or like what hot American summer, like like
that B movie leaning that he does like John Woo does in a really great
way, but done earnestly. It's like not done is extremely earnest and I
love And I couldn't believe they got all of these actors like I would.
I can't believe all these people were super on board to do this type of
thing because for most of the movie, I'm like, okay, I feel
like the John wunas has cooled off a bit. And then in the final
action sequence there are doves flying around. There's a white dove that flies out
basically from Tom Cruise's crotch. Want to be the flaming door, right,
and all the doves come out. It's not just him, you know,
like the more modern movies, the combat hand to hand combats more Jason Bourn
kind of like brutal, knock this dude out as quickly as you can with
as like quick as a puff of punch as you can't. And it's just
Tom Cruise running at people across open fields, dodging their bullets, flipping and
then drop kicking their the top of their head, and then jousting with motorcycles.
Oh my god, that was the scene where they come up and they
are facing and they do. They both do a wheelie on the way.
Yes, that's just a dick measuring contest. And then I saw them the
trailer. They showed them the trailer and I was like, what, I
have to see this. They leap off the motorcycles going probably seventy five and
somehow don't break every bone in their body when they collide midair. He's doing
like slow, little pale kicks to the back of the guy's head, and
oh man great. And then the fight, the hand to hand fight between
them was like all good hand to hand combat fights, just the twin the
Twins fighting on top of the nuclear summary at the end of Guns of the
Patriots. Oh yes, of course that movie was incredible, and the whole
time, like I was, I just could not believe it. You do
it. You have to not watch it with the same expectations as the rest
of the series because it's not nearly as smart. You just have to look
at this, look at it as this anomaly where it's like, what if
John WU got a Mission impossible movie? Yeah, and it happened. You
know, I still can't believe it happened, because I at that time I
would have been I would have been nine. The first mission Impossible I saw
when it was new was three and God, and I don't like again.
I appreciate three a little bit more now. But going from John wu to
JJ Abrams, just going from this like signature weirdo like just to b movie
autour earnest to JJ Abrams the most sterile director ever with a lot of his
stuff is so jarring. But I told him and I was like, basically
from here on out, every movie is incredible. Yeah, that's six.
All get better. And I've not seen Dead Reckoning. We're gonna go.
We're trying to see these and time to go see it in the theme,
I hope you get it. We saw it in theaters and I think I
think it's a pretty neat theater experience too because of the intense action sequences.
So it's fun to see in theaters. But I for the record, I
think if you saw it in your living room that would be fun. Would
you would be really missing out? I think we just want to keep the
Barbenheimer Street going of like it's just nice to get excited about going to theater
again. So we're like, oh, let's build up to this, you
know, Dead Reckoning and like, I feel like I owe it to Tom
Cruise because he saved movies last year with Top Gun, And that's right.
But that's the joke I've seen going around is that like he saved movies and
now we thank him by I don't know. I don't know that Dead Reckoning
has done poorly in the box office, but I know it's done below expectations,
especially compared to Barbie. Did one hundred and twenty million, and it's
opening weekend, I believe over a billion worldwide. Now, yeah, that's
that's crazy. Like theaters did a good job coming out of the pandemic where
it's like, okay, so the pandemic happens, everyone is like, holy
shit, we're never going with theater again. We're just gonna watch at home.
New movies are coming out and streaming, the new Madrins is streaming all
this stuff. And then during that time it seems like theaters really up their
games in terms of like reclining se and features and stuffing like being able to
like, you know, put a bar in heresh. Honestly, it's better.
Movie theaters feel better post pandemic. They totally do. Like I like
them a lot better. Yeah, I don't know. It's just like I'm
thirty two, basically, and it's so fun to be like sneaking drinks and
the I mean, we don't get you know, Rambow last Blood, We'll
never forget. Oh my god, what just swimming in a pool of white
claw that I was spilled all over us, yep sort of thing, and
they probably they had to close just for that. After they saw that,
they were like, there's like, there's like a gallon of white claw in
this carpet. We're gonna have to close. That was patient zero for everything
My white Claws soap jeans coming out began. I went, I took a
train the next day. I spread it immediately. Oh yeah, yeah,
oh my god, Mission Impossible, Mission IPOs too. What a movie you're
not seen in a while, and I want to rewatch one of them.
I would recommend it. I gotta do. I wonder if we should do
a movie thought when you come visit me. I think it'll be fun because
we usually watch something altogether, you know, whether it's Jackass four or I
should have like some kind of thing that we watch everything in succession. That
would be really fun. I remember marying like twenty seventeen or so, I
came back for Game of the Year to the San Francisco office and we just
first night, got a bunch of booze and watched mcgrouber at the Giant bonb
in the office. Yeah, that was really funny, and I think it
was Abby's first time or something like that. There was like a first timer
in that space, and it was just like a funny experience being like why
not, like here we go or I'll watch Grouper and you know, get
in it. But that's such a funny thing, like your very first night
in the city, and that's what we did. Welcome to San Francisco.
That's a good night. That's fun. But yeah, we're looking forward to
Ghost Protocol, Rogue Nation, Fallout. I can't wait to watch Fallout.
The first time I watch Fallout, Dan, we was at your apartment in
Connecticut. I th yeah, it would have been like twenty twenty. Yeah,
we watched it and streamed it and yeah, I remember you loved it,
Jesus Christ. Like, I mean, I've seen it once, but
one of the best action movies I've ever seen. It's very good. And
I which is the one with the underwater vault. That's the four or five.
I think that's five Rogue Nation. I think four is the one with
the birds Dubai. Five is the one with the underwater vault where he actually
held his breath forever, the birds Galifa. I remember that scene too,
That is nuts, But the underwater vault I remember being like, this is
intense, and I love how the further the series goes, the more they
become like just as much heist movies as they are action movies, Like they
have these long and so top Gun Maverick is basically a heist movie as well.
They have these Most of the movie is them planning for one big thing
or it's like mass effect too kind of. I like that structure of story.
So I'm looking forward to watching these next few. It's been good.
I don't have anything else outside of that. I don't think when you guys
been up to I rented a boat? Oh yeah, Instagram, Yeah I
Instagram. Renting a boat is really fun. Did anybody in your party need
a license? No? But Josh got one anyway, because he's kind of
boat, you know, interested, and so we thought it would be fun
for him to have because you never know when you might need a boat safety
course. So for the record, he doesn't have a boat license. He
took the boat safety course, which basically includes doing some kind of internet review
that takes an hour or two where they tell you, like, be careful
how you turn the boat, and you know, really take care in docking
the boat. Anyway, here's your digital license. You can take a photo
of this. Yeah, but you didn't, Like I'm surprised. Maybe it's
maybe it's a state thing, like maybe Oregon doesn't require it. I'm just
surprised, Like if you were to get pulled over by any authority that you
wouldn't need a license. You need a car license in order to rent the
boat on the same thing with jet skis, so you do have to have
a license, and then the boat has to be registered and they show you
where the registration is in the boat in case you get pulled over, and
it can I believe impact your driving license. So like if you drove the
boat drunk and like got in trouble for it, I think it counts as
a dewey. I think you had to be absolutely it does. I was
asking him when I was at Lake of the Ozarks, because like everyone there
is always just drinking on a boat. Everybody always do you do on there?
So yeah, I was asking about that and they were saying, like,
yeah, technically you can get that, you can get the dui and
everything, but like you have to really be like like on a lake,
you got to be like trying to get a duy. You gotta be like
fucking with people or being like super loud in the middle of the night or
something. I agree. I think you have to be a total dickhead.
And if you're gonna do that, just get a jet ski because you're not
gonna damage anyone on a jet ski. Most likely, you'll probably just fall
off and act a fool. But like boats, anything that's big and heavy
and speedy, you gotta keep your shit together. I definitely feel like we
had a really good time and we're like down to have a drink, but
you you had to keep your wits about you on a boat, you know,
you don't want to mess around with that stuff. Also, like I
don't really much about like marritime rules and licenses and stuff like that. That's
exactly how you pronounce it, marie time. I'm that's it's maime. That's
a little bit marritime every day maritime clause or page twenty three, clause sixteen.
Let me look, pull out your little book and like, shall not
not drink tall? I don't know because I wrote it. It's my diary
and it just has merry time on it. It sounds fun, though.
Were you on a river or a lake? Uh river Portland has a few
of those, so you can go up, go lammet uh and kind of
go back and forth on that one. And so we did that a lot
and hooked up our radio. It was really fun because we had a I
didn't know you could do this, but you can have a joint Spotify playlist
and anyone can add to the playlist. You send a link around to everybody,
so anyone can add to the playlist. So we're like listening to eighties
rock, which is probably like, uh, Josh's addition, and then Katrina
probably put in like some some nineties classics that we grew up with, and
then I put on this is Halloween, and uh, everybody was like,
god damn it, Mary. But it became a little bit of a theme
throughout the day because we'd be listening to a tropical beat song and the afternoon
heat would kick in and then all of a sudden it would be like this
on a lake. Loved it by the end, I think it became funny.
I'd recommend the Lake of the Ozarks if you want to only hear Jason
Aldean all the fucking time. Oh oh, you will be on a boat
blaring Jason Aldean, passing three ducks Blarry Jason Aldean. People have Jason fucking
aldin fucking Couzi's on their beer. Oh boy, he's basically yeah and on
a dirt road. Is that cold bear hanging at the window? And then
my old chuck, it's a forward you know what song? I random uh
neither aman alright, really listen to That's a much country but just randomly,
if I'm bored or it's too quiet in the apartment, I'll start shouting,
Uh, what's the beer? Is a good thing song? I don't know
who sinks there is a good thing? Makes carn, carn, makes whiskey?
Why nice and frisky? Let me see thee you're making that. I
want to see if you guys have heard these Yeah, have you guys heard
these songs? Or is it just a Kansas thing? Because I've heard these
a million times in every bar I've been to for twenty years Upstate New York.
I think my track, or she thinks my track, or okay,
you know that one. He would check out. I don't care honk,
but you know that one too. These are like early two thousands, like
they're still played every fucking night. Another one, Yeah him my red MC
moment ain't no high class brown. There's the h I took a forty four
shamy to both head like Louisville. Yeah, that's carry Colin carry way down
the under in the Chattahoo you never knew everybody if little Live want more times
the speed you sound like a TikTok a little on the trash. You're sad?
You know that one on a dart right out up state New York.
Really likes country music as well, at least really the circles I was kind
of on the periphery of when I was coming up. The entirety of my
knowledge of this type of music comes from working at a Texas roadhouse, and
I heard I ate it one last night all get out. Did you do
the thing where you bring saddle and rolls from scratch the Cinning rolls. There's
a bag filled with those rolls upstairs right now. No, they were really
fucking good. Do they do that thing where they bring the saddle out and
if someone's birthday and everyone has to say ye to do all that? Oh
yeah, I drolled that saddle out. Oh wow. We make all of
the dressings from scratch as well. So the ranch is made with mannaise and
spices. I got the chicken critters with barbecue and ranch. Oh yeah,
that ranch was made in house, sir. Good is ranch the base of
ranch dressing mayonnaise? Most of the time, I always assumed it was like
sour cream based. I think it's got like cream and mayo and five.
Oh no, I guess that makes sense. Mayo makes sense. Yeah,
yeah, cool ranch. The ritos are cool ranch. I got some popcorn
that'school ranch flavor. Now, yeah, that sounds good. So when I
was sixteen, I probably lived off of those roles, Dan, because those
roles. At the end of the day, after I swept up all the
fucking peanuts, I would grab a bag of those rolls and butter and then
eat them in my car. Yeah. Kayla asked for a bag of them
when we were leaving, which because they bake them fresh every day, so
they can't keep them, so they give them to all the staffs because they're
so soft. They're so good. But I do not personally believe that they
survive a day, do you know what I mean? I'm not I'm not
hating them up. I think she's like air frying the man. They're gonna
be rough, I think on the second, on the second eating, but
the boter is still so good. The cinnamon butter. Yeah, it's fucking
I can't believe we're hyping up this place. I hated this fucking place.
And it's like such a classic. You know. My boss was like nineteen
and he was a manager, and he was like, yeah, are late
by five minutes, and it's like, shut up, you're drunk like all
the time. I do not take this job. Seriously, you guys cannot
control me. I'm going to do drugs as soon as I leave this,
play podcasts about video games when I'm molder, and I'm gonna talk shit about
you. I'm gonna talk shit about you. Ron speaking speaking of I really
like those roles. I like, well, everybody likes lob red lobsters,
cheddar biscuits. Oh, I'm box of that and made those at home.
Yeah, you can this like, but a decade ago they actually released it
to the wild. It was mark crazy. It's like talking about fire sauce
and souff. We sell it on sores. Now it's like, oh yeah,
why weren't they doing that malive garden. They're dressed dressing game changer changed
mall off. But if you never had all of garden dressing, I know
it's not endless. I just get a bowl of Alfredo and eat like thirty
fucking bread six with it. I think you know it's in your hot tub.
Make money filled with alfredo. Now we're talking. Okay, it's local,
right, had masks that comes? What? No whos suck? No?
Jake just piped in on the mic. Here you just stop the zoom
Scott into growlings, Jake, Jake Decker. Come on, dude, it's
a gross person. It's just so stumbled in here. Oh, what's a
social security? Are you gonna face off Jake Decker? God, I would
love to. It's a lot taller than you. You got to be a
similar height. Yeah, he is like, keep your keep your silts.
Just have his face weirdly like painted. He's sitting on my shoulders and we
have a trench coat. All of a sudden, I'm taller and skinnier,
and I'm on stilts. It's like, what the fuck is this guy doing?
Clearly it's you. I didn't change, but I don't bother changing my
voice. Jake got a bunch of new tattoos. Who would you who?
If you had the chance for one week to face off with somebody else,
who would you do? Or who would you be? I've always said John
Drake, John Drake, and I would just go to a bunch of like
Disney meetings, like big executive stuff, and just be farting and saying stupid
ship career. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, oh okay, interesting,
Yeah, I shouldn't be surprised do yeah. But it'd be funny. It'd
be worth it, he would laugh. I think I would go Who would
I be? I got you cut you fucker ruined your life, your degree,
God, your wife and baby hate you now. I farted all over
that kid. They are you know, let's let's say they're like in a
healthy induced coma. No that's not healthy. They're in a healthy like they're
taking a healthy like they're put into cryo sleep for a week. I mean
that happened to cast you Troy, and you saw what happened, so you
got we have president Mary, who would you be? I don't know.
You just sprung this on me. I'm not prepared. Could It doesn't work
with birds? No bird faced across your human head. I don't want to
fly. You would cover your nose. Mary. This is clearly you.
No, you're not getting it's a bill like et finch into a bird like
this is a you're swapping faces. You're gonna suck up that bird skins.
No, you definitely were not ready for this question. Clearly I'm not saying,
and you don't know how to fly just because you would do we surgically
attach your head and brain to a bird? Is that what you're asking?
Oh my god, imagine a bird body trying to fly with Mary's actual size
like big cartoons, stitches like Frankenstein's. It's not the fead. It's not
like I have a head on like a pigeon. It would be like my
face on an albatross, look like a soft, wrinkly softball flying through the
air. But then we got a bird, you would have a bird face
on your nose, cover dress, your nose. But but I'm the other
one, right, Well, your brains in the same body, so that
would suck up. So you're just gonna have a weird, fucked up bird
face. You're you're still you why but you're a very convincing clone of another.
First thought, you're facing off, You're not You're not swapping. It's
not called body off. Are you taking this back? Are you officially we'recanting?
Are you going to double down? Okay, yeah, we'll come back
off. Can come back to me, Dan, John Drake, I have
someone in mind. I have someone in mind, but I'm worried they're boxing
skills. Are I'm too good of a boxer to pull them off? I
think my Irish accents also too convincing. I don't know who would I be.
No, this is a good question. I'm trying to think. If
you remember, you have the same body, it's just you're getting someone else's
face, so you have to deal with your same body. We learn from
the bird ex right, But like right and John Trakes, you could wear
like baggy clothes so people don't like notice that you've fluctuated, and I can
shove my beard into the John Drake face. Skin, so it might be
coming out the mouth. But I would be this. Maybe I'd be like
Chris Plant in like a company meeting, like like an all hands give yourself.
I would be like, hey, hey, he's here on the call
somewhere, but we're actually giving like Ma Hardy a five hundred thousand dollars a
year. Well, I don't know why would I would announce the monetary rays
Uh, he's also head of he's gonna be h. He's also we're giving
him New York City like the city itself. I don't know how he'd have
the power. Do you sign all of Chris plants plants benefits and life insurance
and stuff over to you as the benefits? Yeah? I take all of
his four oh one k. Yeah, you could do that with anybody.
I'm just targing Chris Plant now because he came to mind. Sure. Yeah,
you guys are just yeah, well you're just doing it to bully someone
theirs John Drake. Oh, I would addresses Chris Plant and go to a
soup kitchen and feed the homeless and give him a really good reputation. Is
that what you want to hear? Mary? No, Mary wants the fucking
strap her face to a bird around a bird. Yeah, you can cover
the whole bird with your fucking face fully for Toado over here. I just
said, I like, that's your theme song. Not's the song's about.
Yeah, that's the joke. And then she tries to fly away, and
then the bird wrote promiscuous yep, and then Jada to fly Oh. I
would be a basketball player, but like only at the press conference is and
not on the question just bedazzled. Oh yeah that happens. Oh my god,
so bad. Yeah. I would never want to be a sport person
because you need brain for sport and I could never get away with it.
And it's your same body. If if I put you're still you. If
I would wayne Bob's face on my face, I still have my body.
You could drink yeah, because you drink the seventy beers on the way to
I don't know if there's seventy though. But I definitely couldn't play baseball.
No, baseball is hard. It sets me someone with an important face like
Biden. That would look weird if you put Biden. Yeah, but I'd
probably still get in the room if I wore like sweatpants. Are you cutting
your hair? I would you just set your stuff in your beard under so
like hair, Yeah, all right, but it might come out of the
eye holes and then like when you're up in the podium, people are gonna
be like, what's wrong. Joe's consider the top of your head and you
wear like a big hat with the flaps over there. Everything that sprouts from
the neck up is considered. Yeah, hair sprouts, I guess from the
neck up. But still like I think there's height and other bodily things going
on with If you put Joe Biden's face on yours where people would notice he's
photographed a lot, I think people would notice people. People, people will
Fox News would be like Fox News would have Biden. I can tell Fox
News to go fuck itself and Mary could go into the to the press conferences
and just thrash people. I assume we get the microchip that changes your voice
too, right, Yeah, just sound like my ass Fox says Joe Biden.
We're protecting all the amendments, all of them liked you. I'm old.
Let's come back to listen the email section, get maybe think about some
more answers. Feel good now and my warm up? I feel good and
I would be Kamala and I'd be there waiting with a sharpened blade, and
it's the perfect crime. Guys. I changed, Okay, I changed.
I changed my answer. Mary, what's the name of your best friend?
How dare you? I won't tell you it's a bird. I would just
I would just be your best friend. Can get in real close, and
then it's the perfect crime. If I was like, you're my best friend,
Oh, get the face off yourself seems unnecessary. Really, yeah,
at that point, I might as well just do the thing. Oh,
Mary, that's so sweet. There's twenty five new holes in your Do you
guys want talk about video games? Sure? Dann and Mary. I've been
trying to get you two into wine for years and it's finally been super easy
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com slash Fire Escape fifty to get fifty percent off. I have spent a
lot of the video game section the last two episodes talking about how excited I
am for Balder's Gate three shot up about it that excitement was warranted. I'm
like, in that game a whole bunch, all right, tell me what
you like about it. I also like it, but I'm curious, Like
I've had a couple of people say to me, this is the pinnacle of
storytelling and will essentially become like the new gold standard by which we judge story
games. I'm the story has me hooked, for sure. My appreciation of
the game or admiration of the game is not just on story. I actually
think they're I mean, it's a super dense game with hundreds, if not
thousands of characters that you can just chat with that some of them, you
know, it runs the gamut in terms of dialogue quality and storytelling, and
I think there are some parts in the story where I was shaking my head
a bit and kind of flabbergast did that this happened that way? X and
Y. But just in general in terms of the role playing and the like,
it's so funny to see this coming off of Tears the Kingdom. I
feel like twenty twenty three, we're finally seeing like emergent gameplay immersive sim elements
really leak into everything. This isn't the first time Larry And Studios has done
this. Divinity Original Sin two was basically the reason. You know, I
imagine that Balder's Gate. You know, they got the rights to Balder's Gate
to make this, But just the density of this world and the amount of
times in the last two weeks that I've been playing where I'm like, oh
my god, I never even once considered doing this puzzle like that, or
like doing anything like this with that character, or holy shit, that's the
same class I'm running, and I'm seeing someone do something super cool on social
media or my friend text me, or like Jake, who's played way more
than me, he has three characters. Just the sheer breadth of things that
Larry And Studios has accounted for in the immersive sim elements of this game,
puzzle solving, combat, character storytelling. Of course, you're you're gonna push
up against the limits every once in a while, but oh my god,
like I have to keep every once in a while, I do something,
I'm like, all right, that was weird, that was off the beaten
path. There's no way Larry and is going to account for that and then
they do, and I have to keep reminding myself not to underestimate them.
And it's not perfect. There are a lot of annoying things about this game
as well, but it just pals in comparison to how fun this is.
It feels like playing a BioWare RPG in their golden age, but times three
hundred. I can't get enough of it. I'm it's the most obsessed with
the game I've been, like, I liked and I'm not going to start
comparing it to other games yet really in terms of how much I'm liking it,
But like, oh my god, I played a lot of Tears the
Kingdom and I liked that game a whole fucking lot. But I don't think
I thought about that game as much when I'm not playing it as I'm thinking
about Balder's Gate three. It's amazing what they let you get away with,
and I agree with you. There's decisions that you make really early on.
You're like, it's a little early to make such a dramatic choice in this
game, and I feel like within the first hour they're just like, well,
we're all turing the entire game because you've made a decision. Good luck,
fuck. Oh. I do appreciate the fact that they have given the
create the player so much power, but it's like, to your point,
A lot of times you're like, you can't let me get away with this
already, can you? And they do. I fuck myself over that much.
There's there's no way they'll let me fuck myself over like that, Like,
oh, yeah, you just kill any character pretty much, right,
even like critical Okay, I know I was going to test in that on
a joint bomb streaming. I think I killed like the cover stars of the
game immediately upon meeting them, so I think you can do that. I
think basically killed There's characters in the very first area where it says very clearly
I would be careful pressing any buttons in here. I immediately pressed a button
and killed someone and went I shouldn't have pushed that button. Oh, just
kept going. Are you guys on a console? No? Okay? PC?
Both? Okay? Controller either you? Uh no, but I've heard
you good, Yeah, you can hear it. Yeah. So it doesn't
actually release on consoles until September six Xbox in twenty twenty four. However,
you can play with the game head and apparently I have a co worker Joshua
Rivera, who wrote a quick thing today I'm Polygon, who was saying,
if you can try it out, you might like it if you're playing on
PC, as you've seen, if you're not super used to CRPGs or MMOs.
Not that this is an MMO, but they have similar uy's. It's
like my character has forty five different spells they could cast. It's overwhelming.
However, apparently there are radial dials on game pad that kind of the game
itself boils down for you what you can do at any one moment, so
it makes it a bit more digestible. Apparently I still would play mouse and
keyboard personally, but supposedly you can. It kind of distills your possible actions
at any one moment on game pad, which I want to check out.
I like that idea of I would prefer because I like the idea of putting
it on a TV and playing with a controller. That's like my storytelling game
preferred method. But I could not get it's a function with a controller myself,
and I found it confusing, and I went back and played it with
keyboard and mouse, and I had just such a better experience. Yeah,
I'm playing mouse keyboard. It's I Mary, what a Dan? Are you
so? Actually? Dan? And I think I want to ask you because
I would assume, knowing Mary's love of divinity original sin too, I would
assume Dan, you're probably not as committed to your playthrough or I'm already done.
Okay for me? Yeah wow, good job. Yeah my third character
beat it with that. Yeah, well maybe if we don't count the Belgian
stuff I played there. I've played about hour hour and a half away,
did a stream that was maybe a couple of hours, then I made a
character on my own. But uh yeah, it's it's one of those games
I can just completely respect what it's doing, and it seems like it's between
a lot of fascinating things that I would like to see in the experience,
Like Mike you're saying, they're like, oh, there's no way they accounted
for this, and then you can do it like that stuff is I always
love that shit. It's just at the end of the day, the UI,
the amount of like, I don't know any I've never played a CRPG
before, I've never played an MMO before, I've never played Dungeons Dragons really
before. It is just too much for me, it's too much talking,
it's too many systems. So I think it's just something that I have to
like, uh respect from Afar, but it's it's not for me. I
said that out loud. I said this is too talkie. Dan will never
survive this. Oh no, there's way too much going on. Yeah,
it's it's also well, I have quite a lot of this game that's annoying
me, several which I'm confident they'll they'll patch out. But Mary, what
do you have one character right now? Are you focusing on one? Are
you kind of running? I've built, but I'm only playing one. I'm
currently playing a half elf sorcerer. I made her real hot, nice,
I made her super hot. What she's joke? She's Oh, it was
like you'd be like, I'm confused, I'm not. Do you have a
photo anywhere? Have you like tweeted or anything? Yeah, I'll put or
have you streamed it? Because I want to see did you just wrap your
character's face around a bird? Are you? I love that body of a
bird? Right, Yeah, that's my big thing. He's just human faces
wrapped around birds, That's right. Daniel, little freak on the Airborne needs
the airborne. Yeah, I like my women in the sky. That's what
I say. What does that mean? You know what it means? You're
a little Dan. Dan randomly stops when we're on the side. I points
to a burden the sky like that's where women belong. And I'm like,
Dan, they're late for dinner. What are you doing? Keep the stuff
to himself. He does it all the time. Stop the car. I
respect them so much in the air. I like that. And You're like,
wait, is this like a weird is this a bad thing? And
You're just like, no, I have such a profound respect. He's good
sky women. This insane Mary. I'm I'm doing a Gnome an Earth Gnome
Druid with the Circle of the Lands subclass, so I'm kind of vascillating between
shape shifting. But also I'm like my party's healer and castor yes, I
am doing a playthrough first. And that's the thing that's like, that's the
the double side of coin of games. This dense. It's like, while
I'm playing this playthrough, ideally, I'm like, oh man, I can't
wait to do another play through, whether I even finish this one or not.
And I'll use will Way more and my party I'll have. I'll have
house in and my party way more. I'll have like Carlac, I'll play
with her more. But it's like right now, I'm kind of enjoying sticking
to my one party that I really like and just seeing things through with them.
I've got a Starian, got Lazelle and shadow Heart. I'm romancing to
shit out of shadow Heart because she's a babe. Dancing people is fun.
Being a little slut is fun. Being caught is super fun. My gnome
is a little babe. Shit sounds like we're both having sorry, really sexy
time. I have a little song that I sang when I play it.
What is it? Two sexy ladies? This is Halloween Mary. That was
the boat song. Leave it on the boat. We've got in international waters.
Put her, I put her in the discord. I got sidetracked by
Paramon. Did you oh, what's the face? Dots on the face dots?
I the maace dots. I gave her scars. I gave her smoky
eyeshadow romeos. She has two different colored eyes. It gus. I'm gonna
go for a few minutes. Come on a breath when I get back.
I was just I was running. It was I went for it. I
had so much much fun. And the whole last part was like I chose
everything based on aesthetics, so like she's a sorcerer and she's really good,
like she ya throws a mean fireball. But I did it all because I
thought she looked good in those ros. She looks she's got a Margot Robie
type one thing. Yeah, as if that was an accident. What's her
name, Barbie aesthetics? Uh, Gabbo Gabo wasn't a puppet from the Simpsons.
I always do a joke name. I got a breath. I was
just, I was just. I was Janet to Gabbo in the bathroom.
Gabbo, Yeah, Gabbo anyway, Yeah, I'm sticking to a starian who
Okay, I'm also seeing one of two camps. A lot of people are
saying they're having a really hard time romancing everybody, and people are just throwing
themselves in my character left and right. My theory is that the game for
most characters is tailored to appreciate respectable actions, and the people that I'm a
polygon who I know are just like doing homicidal runs or having a tougher time.
I'm like, I think it's because I'm actually kind of playing the Optimists.
He's like the therapist of the group. They're all just fucking confiding in
me. And shadow Heart, of course, is my gift. But I
people like Astarian. I don't want to spoil anything, but you know,
I'm letting him do his thing as a vampire Gail. I'm helping him out
with his basically addiction. I'm helping Will out with his demonic stuff. I
don't know. I'm I'm torn between trying out a bunch of new characters in
the party, but I'm also I've got a I've got a good party.
The storylines so far, the wider storylines I'm finding less enjoyment and the overall
plot than in finding these little pockets of the world where there are these interesting
side quests going on, which isn't a s I think that's most RPGs,
And you can't really see the overall arc until you finished the game. And
by all means, if I finished this game, it'll take me ninety hours.
And if I don't finish it, it's not because of its quality,
It's because I got stuff going on, you know, I don't know this
just this game is incredibly nuanced but also just vast as hell, and it's
intimidating in a many ways. It is intimidating. I promise myself I would
not save scum and just see where things took me. But again, to
your point, Mary, it's like it's it's you can really fuck up that
universe. Oh my god, you like it's crazy too. Like it's like
I was thinking to myself, Okay, what if I didn't rescue that person
on this ship right at the beginning of the game, they would crash and
die at a certain point. And that's not a spoiler, that's that's that's
right at the beginning. But then people are like, oh, no,
there are ways you could bring them back to life. And I'm like,
oh, it must have been this story based side quest that I didn't find.
They're like, no, it's like an item in your inventory. Like,
oh Jesus right, Like there are certain simple things that this game that
I take for granted because I've played every other video game ever made, and
this game really actually takes a lot of that into account. It's like,
no, you have the simple item in your inventory. You got to start
thinking like this character. This character had this magical item, which in this
world is part and parcel. It's just part of this world. They would
use it without a second thought. I'm like, oh right, Like Larion
has just so all encompassingly created this believable world for as dumb as the shit
I'm doing. And I'm doing the crate stacking Lazelle my like my high strength
character. Her inventory is all huge boxes in her clown car pockets, and
I'm just stacking like twelve crates before I get into hard fights so I can
put my archer on top of those to get the advantage. It's like like
Skyrim or something. There are but high strength characters have a pretty high carry
capacity and boxes do not take up as much way as they should, so
you can I saw a stream where Matt Mercer from Critical Role and the guy
who voices Mensk was streaming with Larry and he got to Balder's Gate the titular
city and stack forty seven boxes and use an arrow of teleportation to get over
the ramparts way before he should have, and I was like, sequence breaking.
It's like we've been doing fire Escape long enough, and some people who
listen to fire Escape have been following my work and my collective work with you
guys for long enough where I think people know it's like that's the kind of
gameplay at Cream my jeans over is like sequence breaking and immersive some elements and
immergent gameplay, And I feel like it's your version of a bird with a
lady faced on it. Exactly. That's my bird. That's my face off
in here, fucking Gabbo. It's still got I mean gone on my desktop
background. She just looked at me right now. I feel like twenty twenty
three, it's just been an incredible year. Like games just have been fucking
awesome. The kind of games that I just seek out are now like this
massive RPG that is like continuing this series that Biour kind of passed the torch
on, maybe not willingly, but like a fucking Nintendo is doing this with
Zelda now. It's like I love all the dorics that we're whining for like
the last ten plus years about like they're trying to kill single player games.
It's all got to be multiplayers. Pretty sure we're doing okay on Gable.
I know this is multiplayer as well, but like just single player, you're
You're gonna be all right in a lot of different ways. If ever,
two games were the most, like pay seventy bucks, here's three hundred and
fifty hours of stuff you won't even repeat content. Ye, it's these two.
I was like, it's all cyclical, but and I don't know.
I'm Mary, I'm sorry, I've been rambling. I love this game and
I want to keep seeing it through. But yeah, I don't know.
Have you what are some characters you've liked so far? I'm really early on.
I spent probably five hours building characters just because it's fun to make them
as hot as humanly possible. What what? What? What? What type
did you go with for gabbo? Oh, Vulva two? Nice? Thanks
for asking. I was Penis. Which penis did I go with? Come
on, you have to remember I know what fuck penis type. I wish
everybody should watch Dan's reaction when I said Vulva two. I don't think I
got them Slider or whatever. I'm just a gnome called Dorf on golf.
I'm circumcised, and then my gnome drew Oh my god, here, Oh
really miss that mixer? Yeah, I'm really on. I spent a lot
of time on character creation. I had fun in the early stages. I've
been making some dumb decisions. I've killed several characters already before we're really getting
to know them. I did not kick the squirrel. I feel like that's
important. I don't know if everybody's had this decision, but there's a decision
early on about whether or not you kick a squirrel. It's a little bit
of a does the dog die type situation, so you have to be like,
heads up, like you can kill a lot of stuff. People don't
animals. I know. But it's funny because I've killed people willy nilly and
will not go back on it. I won't be like I should restart,
like that's a good I think that's a good character. I've just killed whoever
I want. But if an animal is in the mix, it's like I
gotta protect, protected, save. Almost always same here in most games.
However, as a Druid, I immediately had the option to talk to animals.
Some of them are dicks and getting hearing like the human voices. I'm
like, oh now I don't feel so bad about fucking rocking you, but
yeah, the animals I can understand. It's like I don't want to broach
this. I don't want to broach this loss of translation with violence served to
be talked down to by animals like we're bad first, and you know we
shot first. If animals are like untrusting of us and nefarious and even a
little sneaky, I say, God, love, that's us. Though.
My druid fucking grew up in the woods. He's a Paul Bunyan folk hero
type. Speak for yourself, you buggle, you could never speak for the
trees, gambo you fucking forests. All the animals are like, we don't
trust her, but god damn, she's so hot. Are you guys doing
any co op at all? Are you guys just doing a single Blair?
Yeah? I play co op. Like I said, we both go with
hot ladies and then we're two sex ladies, says Halloween. Weird with the
conversations and stuff like can you both be having separate conversations? No, the
game. I think. One thing I want to credit this game with is
how it controls the camera and the fighting sequences is really fluid. You can
rotate the camera really easily and very easily, like I can plan my next
move or even can I can move other AI characters while my friend is thinking
about their next move, and I think that's nice to move things along.
When a person in my party strikes a dialogue, it talks for both of
us, so the voting system, right, I get that window on my
screen, and when they make a decision, I see their dice, okay,
which I think is neat because then I'm like kind of seeing whether or
not they deserve to have, like like sometimes they make a gamble they shouldn't
have made, and there they need eighteen and it's like, you don't have
the dice for this, dude, Like you shouldn't have gone there. I
think the dice thing is a big thing that took me out of it because,
like I guess it's because I don't play D and D so I don't
really get the context. So it's like I just don't understand. Like I'm
talking to someone and then I choose something and then I see a fucking physical
dice. Like I know this is just a mean thing, but I see
a dice and I'm like, why the fuck is that dice involved in this
conversation? You know, like it's yeah, it's I mean the number and
I know you know this too. I don't mean to be patronizing the number
of video games you played in the last two years that are using dice but
just not showing you probably, But that's the thing. It takes me out
of it when I see sure for sure, and it's Larian is very much
like doing that, like pull back the curtain and kind of embrace its tabletop
roots. Yeah. I to me, I like it because it's like,
as deep as the role playing is in this game, I'm still fucking pulling
forty two boxes out of this this toad woman like pockets to do something dumb.
So I'm already taking myself out of it willingly just to do like silly
shit. But yes, I can see how it clashes if you're not like
it is. It's just it's just a very obvious, like, hey,
this is how the game works, fourth wall breaking kind of stuff. To
me, it's like, yeah, if I was watching Oppenheimer and then there's
a scene and then it like pans out and I see Nolan like a camera,
It's like, I got It's like, and then it goes the next
scene like that would take me out of it. It's yeah, and I
know that stuff's happening in the background. I know D and D stuff is
influenced games for fucking ever, but like, I don't want to see a
fucking dice on the screen, get that. But I think it's fun to
kind of see the randomness that comes with the choices that you make. So
let's say you're really smart but you're weak. I think it's interesting to me
that if you choose to, let's say, like persuade someone, you have
like a lot of automatic dice, will be like, we're just gonna add
eight to whatever you roll because you're really smart and you're probably gonna understand the
situation. Whereas if you're saying that you're gonna like hold two pieces of a
bridge together so that someone can walk over it, and you're weak, it's
gonna be like, listen, whatever you roll, it's negative too, because
you're a weak little bitch. And that's interesting to me that it's essentially like
you are making these choices. But at the end of the day, Dan,
I can still roll a Gnat twenty, Like I can still have a
really lucky role and do something that my character shouldn't be able to do,
and the dice for whatever reason, is the bridge that allows me to understand
that sometimes I'm doing something that shouldn't happen with my character because I got lucky
because the environment allowed it, because the world said, shit, even a
blind pig finds an acorn once in a while, so you can have it.
But it is rare, and so the roll of the dice to me
is a it's a fourth ball break for you, but for me, it's
what allows me to understand that that crazy stuff happens. Yeah, And I
don't know why it doesn't bother me when, like, you know, if
I'm playing x com and I see four percent chance of a sniper shot landing
or something like that doesn't bother me, and it gives me the same type
of thing. I'm like, oh my god, I hit it. Holy
shit, the odds on that were so low. I don't know why.
It's just the physical die die that I see on the screen. I think
it's just because I don't know D and D and I don't get it,
like you know, I think that's why the die thing throws me off.
I'm just not used to sing that in conjunction with a video game. You
know. You know, it's funny that I know dice from Yatzi and Craft.
Those are my two things. So to see it when I'm like,
oh, what is you're talking to a merchant, It's like, what the
fuck is a dice involved here? Like Yaz doing it my fucking lens thing.
It's funny that Starfield is releasing a month after this, well same day
as the PS five version, because Elder Scrolls came over, and a big
thing with Bethesda's RPGs, basically all of them, is this stuff is happening.
I don't know if you remember, like Elder Scrolls, I think Oblivion
to this as well. And then fall Out three, when you were attempting
a persuasion check in dialogue, it would give you the percentage in brackets right
next to it, right yeah, So no, it would not show the
die rolling and then you would have to wait for it. That would be
happening. And I think, and I might be butchering this, I think
it was fall Out four. They went even further in removing that where it
wasn't a dice roll anymore. It was if you had a certain level of
the stat that was needed to pass this check, you would automatically get it.
So that's what was the what was the thing fall out to, like
you your thing when you were a kid, like the scoring thing. It
was an acronym. Yeah, what the fuck was that? You know what
I mean? The not your aptitude stuff or something like yeah, your vaults
or I don't know, oh I don't. It's just like one of those
automated school things that they did with the children. It was one of those
things where it's like basically the stats you got when you like started your character,
that's the smart one. Why am I? Man? I can't,
I can't remember what the the name of that was Fallout falls statude test character
the GOAT generalized is that special perception charisma intelligence of Gevy and that's all made
up garbage. It was the ghosts the generalized occupational aptitude tests. Okay,
that's something, but yeah, no, I get that, like because they're
just going all out in again, like Bethesda was like further and further trying
to get rid of that stuff. When then I can't remember whether Skyrim was
percentages or just you had to hit a baseline and you passed it automatically.
But like I think Skyrim great out the things. Your character wasn't good enough
that so you could leave the conversation and come back with that. But yeah,
you could see it. So it'd be like, oh, you need
intelligence thirty for this, and then level up a couple of times, come
back and have the conversation. Yeah, and that. Yeah, and that
would make sense because it was like a very intelligent character you were trying to
hoodwink and it would be hard. It makes sense. But yeah, it's
I appreciate that Larry In, for as good as they are making these things,
never takes themselves too seriously to be like, no, we gotta make
this feel like this. Uh we we gotta cover up all these systems that
are at play here. It's like I like that they kind of embrace it,
but I want thousand percents. See how that would also not be for
everybody. But I know it's a meat thing, and I know the audience
that interest this does not bother them, Like I this is not this is
a It's impeding my enjoyment of it a little bit, but like, I
don't think it's like a problem with the game or a bad decision or anything,
you know. But but to your point about coop, you can actually
even way more than I loved playing co op and Original Sin too. However,
and we talked about this last episode, it did feel like it was
more Instead of one coher of co op campaign, it was four separate players
doing their own ship and then kind of convening in the overworld for combat baldr
Gate three. From the limited time I've spent and from everything I've heard I'm
seeing in our slack channel at work, it's like, you can sincerely fuck
with your part your friends campaigns. All the stuff we're saying about killing off
people in your own campaign I've heard. I've seen people saying that one person
has started a critical quest for like one of the main storylines, and they're
like, we're gonna be I'm gonna be a pacifist. I do not have
good combat stats. I'm trying to be a pacifist for this run. They're
like, well, I'm kind of a homicidal maniac. So and then they'll
walk up and kill the quest giver right after they were done. They can't
return it. And I actually don't know how like quick saves would work.
I imagine it would just you would have to appoint someone the host and then
they would be the ones quick saying anything like this, you should have a
bunch of save slots. I would think, Oh yeah, So I don't
know. I would love to play more co op at some point because I
don't know. And as someone who I love the idea of tabletop RPGs.
And I've done like three campaigns in my life and I had a blast every
time, even for the ones that even one of them was genuinely good because
I had a good GM, but the other two were still fun. It's
like I've loved Larryan's RPGs. I love CRPG specifically because it gives me the
thrill of those kind of campaigns, but without having to you know, meet
at someone's house once a week or like I can binge like four hours of
the game or something. So that's why I'm enjoying it. But there's just
so many people that work we're bouncing off it because they're like, oh,
i'll it's Polish Gate three. It sounds like it's like a Biowaress kind of
thing, and then you know, they get into and they're like, oh
man, there's a lot here that is pushing me away. That's the thing.
If it was more BioWare, I think I could do it. You
know, like I played through all the Mass Effects outside of Andromeda, and
even though that's not my usual thing like super talking, heavy thing or whatever,
I appreciated those games. That's kind of what I was kind of hoping
I would have that type of experience with this at front time, with it
in Belgium. But yeah, it's just it's the systems and the game and
the D and D elements has ever just kind of a little beyond me.
So yeah, I don't think it's happening. Oh yeah, it's It's funny.
It's like Mass Effect as well. It's like BioWare, who started Father's
Gate as a series, went and with Mass Effect obscured a lot of these
systems as well, and I think they did a great job of bringing it
to a wider audience. I loved Mass Effect as well. But yeah,
I'm gonna keep playing this. I've got I've got some DLC for a game
that I've talked about this podcast a lot, which I'll be talking about next
episode that is taking me away from Father's Gate. Three s Tro I saw
saying tro has some new deals you out yea, it's gotta be you know
me Diehard Saints Row Mark I'm playing other stuff now, but there's Gate three
I think is going to be the one I go back to between everything else.
Dan, you've been playing wrestle Quest. Yeah based, it's yeah on
paper, this make it sounds like RPG for wrestling. It is, it
is, that's what it is. Yes, no, no, no,
it's on paper. You would think that this is a me game where it's
like, oh, it's wrestling focused and it's like paper Mario type, you
know, combat where there's qts during the fight and stuff. I don't like
this game. I don't like it. I also I'm also not like I'm
fine with my wrestling being in my wrestling and my video games being in my
video games. I don't really need, Like I love wrestling, so I
need to have like a story wrestling Like, No, I'm I don't need
that. And like I do think that you're mileage on this game is going
to vary wildly based on how much of a mark you are for just references
to things and they It is such a wide focus this game has where it's
like, yes, it's wrestling centric in the story, but it's full on
like Ready Player one, it's like, hey, remember blank and blank and
Blank and Ninja Turtles and Pettus Mensers and sa Same Street and this and this,
and it's like, I know they're leaning on like eighties wrestling stuff.
There's a lot of like Macha Man, Jake the Snake, Sergeant Slaughter type
stuff. But it's also like the mini music is like scinth Wave, and
it's like, okay, listen, I said, I don't associate scinth Wave
with wrestling. You're just kind of like doing this big eighties barf on the
screen along with a bunch of other stuff. And it's just weird. Like
Machu Man Randy Savage exists in the game, but you play this game Muchacho
Man Randy Santos, who is just like a he's just a parody of Macho
Man, but like he admires like his hero is the Macho Man. It's
there's a lot of guys that obviously didn't get the license for and they just
made like, oh, this is the Bret Hart stand in, this is
the Rick Flair stand in, this is the Sting stand in. But then
there's also some like okay, that is actual Jeff Jarrett or Diamond Dallas Page
or whatever. It's just kind of weird but I don't know. I just
I don't find any of the writing particularly clever, and it just the fact
that it is a reference for reference's sake isn't enough to like get me,
Like, oh, I know that it's a sting reference, you know,
I don't. I don't. Yeah. Yeah. It feels very funko pop
Marvel fucking Ready Player one to me, and I don't like it at all.
And like, I love as much as I'm not an RPG guy,
typically, I love paper Mario. I love Mario and Luigi because they bring
action into the turn based combat where it's like, Okay, I'm timing when
this gumbo jumps in my head. If ay it's the last second, Mario
will kind of block some of the damage. This tries to do that kind
of But it's it's all just QT. It's all just a face button.
So you're just waiting for a face button to show up on screen. Okay,
I'm gonna hit. Why I countered that, Okay, I'm gonna hit.
Actually, your basic attack you have to do like a QTE twice every
fucking time, So every fight you do, it's not a lot of specific
Oh, in this move, I have to hit the button. Now it's
a lot of just waiting for a face button to show up and hitting it,
and it's a laborious Immediately there's a system for like pinning the opponent at
the end, and you'll, I think everyone will want to immediately turn it
off and just turn on the auto pen thing. It's I don't know,
it's I don't like it. If you're someone who just likes references for reference's
sake, sure maybe, But like the over it's supposed to be this big,
sprawling RPG, but the overworld has very little things to do. The
Hut elements in the map are like not they don't work well all they're like
puzzles and stuff in the overworld are just really straightforward and basic. And I
don't know, I feel like it had very, you know, grand ambitions
and wanted to be this big, sprawling RPG, and ultimately the writing's not
there to back it up. The combat which pops up all the time isn't
there to back it up. It's ye, and I had glitches with it.
I had problems where it's like an animation loop in the middle of a
fight, like a long boss fight. I had to read start an old
save. If you're listening to this. It was supposed to launch on the
eighth today as we're recording this, but fucking the eleventh hour they delayed it
two weeks. So they found out there's some like save progression type stuff that
you'd lose a whole save. So it's got a lot of problems. I
don't I don't like it. I appreciate that, Like, you know,
people that made it obviously have a love for wrestling. There's you can tell
in the way that they were writing it and stuff in the dialogue that like
they were trying to do something different with the wrestling genre and wrestling and video
games for the last I don't know ten years has been a pretty ugly spot,
Like the two K games are not great, the AW game is not
great, and it's like there was room for something that was trying something different
in this space, and uh, this ain't it. But I appreciate that
they try. So do you think there is an audience for this game?
There's no audience for Funco pops. I don't know. People like fucking seeing
references to ship that they like Ready Player one was popular. I don't know,
It's like not my shit at all. I think people wanted this game
to be good. I wanted this game to be good, you know.
I A good love letter to wrestling sounds fun to me, but it's just
this is, uh, this is not doing it. Did you play Golf
Story? I did, and I love golf video games. I don't give
a shit about actual golf, but like golf video games are so much fun.
And I was like, oh, man, if we built a JRPG
or like an RPG around golf, that's such a cool idea. I remembered.
I mean that was years ago at this point, and I played maybe
a couple hours before. I was like, this isn't like the concept and
very like kind of high concept that I liked a lot, but it I
remember not liking the game play that much. Yeah. I liked Golf Story.
And then they released this year or last year Sports this story, right
Sports with that this year it was resonally that was recently. Yeah, I
like those because I think they're a bit low lift. They're nice to just
kind of relax with the Steam deck helped. I was hoping Wrestle Quest was
going to be kind of the Golf Story for wrestling. I know it's not
at all the same developer that those two were sidebar games. But I was
hoping wrestle Quests would be like, oh, cool term based wrestling like with
like the fact that it's laden with little like inside baseball references makes me not
want to try it out. Well, it's not even inside baseball like wrestling
references. It's just like a shitload of just like eighties nineties stuff where it's
like it's just throwing everything in the wall. And even that though, like
even that, it's like golf story wasn't like frequency frequently referencing like Arnold Palmer
or like these older golfers like Phil Nicholson. Those are the two I know.
But like that's why I could enjoy it, because I can enjoy the
mechanics of the sport in like this cute, kind of relaxed RPG world.
But I don't. I knew from a glance that wrestle Quest was not the
same thing, but I was kind of hoping it could be like that,
like wrestling light game I get into, But it does not sound like that's
the case. No, there's a place where this could have worked, but
this is not the one, not the one. Huh m. Hmm,
Mary, you did you finish Venba? I know it's like an hour long,
it's an hour and a half to two hours, and I did finish
it. What do you think of it? So, yeah, this is
for anybody who doesn't know. This has been making a round at Polygon as
well. Uh like kind of half visual novel, half simple cooking puzzles about
some an immigrant family. He plays the mother coming to Canada and they are
she's making meals for her family. Basically, that's the premise i'd say,
But yeah, I don't know you take it from there because I have not
played it. I've heard great things about It's on your description. It seems
like you have it takes uh stuff about it. It's such a short game
that you really can experience this in a in just a piece of your evening.
So I really have to recommend this game. It's on game Pass.
I did not kiss it. I was recommended it because I was playing other
wholesome esque games, And I would say the main gameplay mechanics is your mom
has a recipe book, but it's been a little ruined and so pieces are
missing out of it, and you get to make those decisions and decide how
you should be cooking authentic Indian dishes. They are extremely delicious looking and sounding,
and they do a great job at the audio and the video, and
they have a radio that plays original tunes while you're while you're making the food,
and it's fun. I don't know how to make any of those dishes.
I learned a lot about how to make some of those those dishes.
But it's also a very authentic and genuine sneak peek into a family's life and
what it's like when you are a first gen immigrant moving to Canada, and
it's extremely passive in how it allows you to see and understand what's going on
in these characters lives. I'll give you a couple examples, but I'll be
careful not to give away too many. Because this game is so short,
I could accidentally give away the point of playing it, so I want to
be careful not to give away too much. But one of the examples is
that the mom wears a lot of jewelry, and they make a active effort
that every time she's in a scene she kind of jingle jangles when she walks,
which is such a classic mom move. And I don't know about you
guys. But my mom always had her keys and I could always hear her
keys and her purse when she would walk around, And he's like, my
mom is nearby because I can hear them keys. It's kind of like that,
where like she has this iconic audio to her. So they did a
good job kind of characterizing her in her outfits, in her style and her
design and her audio to you feel like she's just like that classic mom doing
her thing. But then they will explain pieces about what's going on in the
family's live with small visual or audio cues that hopefully you pick up on.
One of them is it's a mom and a dad and a child. And
in one of the scenes that they're trying to spell out the dad's name and
they have to say it like six times because it's not a standard American name
and as is tradition where we can't process it because the name isn't you know,
Vince, And they show him later and his name tag for his company
that he works for is misspelled, and I feel like, and they never
comment on it doesn't come up. It's just shown for very brief moment,
and I think that's such a telling expression that this game is explaining it's very
difficult to come from another culture and have people just constantly not know how to
pronounce your name, spell your name, not give a shit about the way
your name is shown on his ID badge, right, that he goes into
work every day and it's wrong. So it's just these like small moments that
let you really feel for this family and what they're going through. But again,
they do it very passively. I don't think that it's too heavy handed.
Most of the game play, again is learning how to cook, which
is fun and lighthearted, and then every once in a while a cut scene
I'll get you, and I would say this might have beaten my record for
game to cry. I cried within ninety minutes, Flats. I absolutely cried
towards the end cut scene, and I absolutely texted my mom that I loved
her that evening. These are real stories that happened to me after playing Venvia.
I do encourage you to play. It's such a short amount of your
time, Like, even if it's not Holy your cup of tea, you
can play this game by the time somebody builds a character in Balder's Gate,
Like, it's a really good story. And I do think it's worth everyone
playing. I think it's well told. It is short, and it's simple,
but the themes and what it's trying to say is important. I think
it nails the things that it's trying to accomplish. And it'll make you love
your parents because they went through a lot of shit for your stupid ass,
you know. The oddly enough the and again I've not played, but yet
I intend to. But the idea that you're it's telling this kind of bite
size story, emotional story in like through cooking reminds me of Florence, that
mobile game about that relationship building and then like kind of breaking up. It's
a good comparison that was also like an It's like not not a heavy this
is not a difficult game to play. This game I actually want to play
with my mom. I bet you my mom would appreciate this game and enjoy
learning recipe. I'll also say I'm very interested in eating one of these dishes
now because I haven't heard of many of these dishes before. These are not
your like standard dishes exactly. And that comes up in the game as well,
which is like can't you make a vindoloo? And they're like all right,
you are not on the same where we are not on the same level
here. These are very authentic dishes that I have never seen, let alone
made, so I'm very out of my comfort zone. But having the recipe
say don't forget to blank or it's gonna get all soggy, And I'm like,
what is it? Because I don't know how to make this, let
alone what I'm supposed to do to stop it from being ruined. It's it's
a it's an interesting concept to see, like how you ruin the food and
it's just it immediately snaps and lets you try again. There's like no punishment.
It's not like your kids like I hate you, mom, you ruin
my dinner. It just it just lets you try again. I do want
to check it out. It helps that it's like ninety minutes, but also
between the bear and parts unknown coming back to max now as it's called,
I'm very much in the mindset of like storytelling through food and cooking, So
I feel like Venba might a company compliment those two shows valid job of explaining
culture, family dynamics, and also how you express yourself. And that happens
in the first five minutes of the game. You will learn how food is
it just a means of fuel or like the way you survive. It's how
they communicate. It's a piece of us, and that is true for most
of us, if not all of us. That maybe like the dishes that
you cook or the dishes that you ate as a child do define you,
and you will absolutely get You will watch it's so fun to watch someone get
ratitu eid, you know, like, watch someone get ratitu eied in this
game is really funny. They just like eat a dish and they're like my
mother, Like that happens to all of us. I feel like I have
dishes that I ate as a kid that if I have now, I'll be
like my mom used to cook that. My mom used to always make this.
I mean these are very generic and classic, but my mom always made
chicken noodle soup when I was sick, and as she made it mostly from
scratch, and I just like, not the noodles, you know, but
like I haven't chicken. A little soup reminds me of my mother, just
like it's it's like sends me right back, man, And I think this
this game really does that, and it does it with heart so fully recommend
it, and again it's it's an hour and a half and it's free on
game Pass, Like, yeah, give it a whirl. Yeah, I
want to try it out. I might do that like over a lunch break
at some point if I can't finish it by that, Dan, you should
try it too, because I was worried about you because it is talkie is
talkie, but the Dewey is really fun, Like it's it's fun to try
and cook, and I think you might like those aspects of it if you
can get through the talkie. I like the like cooking related game stuff like
you know, even like cooking mama and all that stuff. Like that's it.
It's a fun thing that translates to games better than you think it would,
or whether it's serving food like a cook served delicious or actually preparing it
so like yeah, but I mean I can see myself enjoyant. Yeah,
make an emotional whenever I make a Totino's party pizza because I made it.
I made it. Yeah, my mom was working at Macaroni Grill. But
yeah, it just makes you nostalgic for your own cooking when you were young.
Yeah, yeah, when I eat a quarter pounder or make a Totino's
party pizza. I get nostalgic for my own feeding myself. Like when you
if if you pretend I'm your kid, you are my kid. Yep,
okay, And in sick seventy years, when you're dead, all I have
left of you is your cookbook and it's just a microwave recipe for totinos.
I'll do it. I'll like know, you just have memories of me dropping
you off at the fire station and never saying you again. Do kids get
dropped off at fire station? You can. It's legal. You can just
drop them off. It's a safe it's a safe thing if you don't want
your kid. Yeah. I can't believe people don't talk about this more.
This seems like a great way out if you don't like having a kid.
It's just like they have signs at the fire station being like, hey,
drop off your kids if you don't want them. Like, I don't know
what people aren't doing this all the time. They have little dirts and they
get you Are you serious? That's a real deal? Yeah? Like all,
let me look at what the actual name is. It seems like a
station's like sanctuary places for children drop Yeah, yeah, yeah, so like,
yes, yeah, safe haven location. If you have to, you
can surrender your baby to a safe haven location like a fire station. No
matter your age, you will never get in trouble for surrendering a baby safely
or contacting adoption agency, even if you're under eighteen. So you can just
if you're not into it, if you have a kid and you're like,
oh, this is more than I thought it would be, just put it
in a basket, drop it off at the door, and bring the doorbell.
You're fucking done, home free. What other methods? What other places
can you drop kids off? I don't know, say it has to be
other places. Oh, police stations, I guess are cool. All right,
Okay, so government government buildings, safe haven laws. Okay, that's
what it's called safe haven laws. Okay, you drop a kid off.
Because of the implication the just you don't want the kid, it seems like
a good system. I do think there should be a better system for being
like I'm a bad parent, I'm going to do a bad job, so
I'd rather not do it. We have a better system to pre empt that.
But oh, just not having kids? Oh right, I was just
saying a lot of states outlawed it recently. I'm not having kids not to
go. It also seems like a good system. Yes, it feels like
a better system. Also in favor of that system, yees feel like we
had a better system than now. It's like now fire stations are flooded everywhere?
How often you don't know that. I'm shocked. It's not I'm shocked.
Then every time you drive by a gas or a fire station, there's
not thirty kids in front. Your little Freddian slip is just infants crawling over
a BP terrible trying to fuel up, and they're crawling in the backseat and
you gotta pull them out. Yea, the fine warm fire going off,
and all the firemen get they got the hose. They're spraying them off the
driveway, like get the out. Would kill a baby. That would murder
a baby. They're just trying to be friends with you so that you take
them home unleaded Papa, away from the driveway. The driveway, we got
to move the trucks out here. Okay, a hose at a gas station.
I thought you met the fire station. No, I'm talking about the
fire hose. Okay, that would kill me. I'm saying we need to
move these babies quick because we have a fire to put out. We're turning
fire hose. I'm doing what should have been done two trimesters ago. Should
we cut that? I'm bad? Oh, it's fine. Baby seem annoying?
The baby kids seems like a great that's great. Yeah, we we
just we figured everything out in this country. What else about? What?
So? Uh? Frog Song? Sorry? Frog Song is a game I
found through Wholesome Games, which is the opposite of this podcast. Wholesome Games
is ah. It's just like a little group. They have a Twitter and
a TikTok and they explain like cozy, comfortable games that aren't stressful, and
I like them. And they teamed up with Steam and they did a sale
on Wholesome Games, and so I picked out a couple of games through that
sale, and one of them is frog Song. This came out this year.
It's pretty cute. It's a heartfelt adventure and you're just a little frog.
You have a backpack and a cute little butt and you want to protect
the world. But your previous village, I guess I didn't believe in you
or kind of thought negatively of you. So they leave. I thought this
was neat because it's not very common. But the frog is non binary,
so it's kind of like a non binary hero and they're just like running around.
They got a little sword and they're fighting the bugs and really big monsters
out in the world kind of to prove themselves to the universe. It's got
some really fun action elements to it. I would say the combat's really simple.
It's one button. There's also a dash, but it really doesn't come
into play that much. It's essentially you just you hit a button to swing
your sword, but you know it gets the job done. There's a lot
of fun little mechanics where you sharpen your sword. There's a person you could
buy sweet treats from like every shop so that you can have food in your
backpack in case you need to eat when you're in the world so that you
don't die. You can deckor at your home. I thought this was fun.
You can buy things from various vendors in the areas that you meet,
and then you decorate your little frog dwelling with it. I bought some cute
stuffed animals and hung them on my like put them on my shelf at home
and made it feel a little bit more comfortable. It's cozy and kind of
sweet, but it is in action games. There is fighting in it.
Another thing I thought was neat is that this game, you get a bug
that's in your backpack and he just kind of hangs out with you, and
for whatever reason, if you're like I no longer want to be stressed,
you take the bug out and he helps you fight, and then you're like,
honestly just kind of over, You're just op and it takes a lot
of the stress out of combat. But if you're like me, you keep
the bug in the backpack and you fight and sometimes you die. Zo.
Yes, Yeah, it's like it's a simplified it's a nice, seamless way
to essentially be like, if you don't want to worry about it, just
take the bug out. There's a map. A lot of it is exploration
to get to the next destination. You're constantly helping the villagers with their deeds
or their tasks. Eventually, when you get to the end of an area,
you'll typically find uh like a boat, and the boat is fast travel
and travels you to the next area. The cut scenes are stupid adorable,
like when you're when you're fast traveling. It's just like a frog like on
the edge of the boat being like, where are we going? You look
ridiculous. You just look so cute in this game. I don't think that.
If you look up the images for Frog's song, almost immediately you'll see
this just like outrageously cute frog with a little dagger being like, oh what
do I do? It's just it's a cute. It's a cute. But
I don't see any butts in the images. Well, I don't think that
in any of these images they had the character walk away. But if you
point the character away from you, you get a good little butt shot.
All right, I found one. I'll put this in the in our discord.
It's just a don't know, I'm using the bumping gabble Gabbo with this
frog's but oh, imagine a face swap of Gabbo and this frog. You
need to put an adult tag on this discord. There's just like he's got
I don't know. I don't want to say it's a it's a simple game.
It is not a complicated game. I wouldn't say this is for people
who are looking for a more serious adventure game. This is lighthearted, it's
cute, it's quaint. Your life is lily pads, So you have like
like four lily pads. It's super easy to acquire more life more lily pads,
and so towards the end of the game you have like twelve lily pads.
If you use that plus your bug yate Diane, uh, you basically
just get to like run around, fight bugs, protect your frog friends,
and you defend your honor a lot. This game is a lot of tones
of people not believing in you or tough relationships. This frog ends up going
back to the village that they originally left, and everyone in the village is
like, your back, huh. We kind of knew you weren't going to
make it. And it's just like there's tones of this frog being wronged in
their life significantly over time, which is basically like fuck you guys, I'm
leaving and dealing with that and dealing with the process of that. And Mike,
I know previously there were games that you and I liked, the one
where you paint stuff, the one where you paint the world chicky. Yeah,
that game I think was similar where it kind of touches your heart a
little bit and you're like, there's some serious tone stuff in here about what
it's like to look deep and down inside yourself and get strength and move forward.
I think frog Song has some of that too, although it's a bit
more watered down, but it's got heart. You know. It's about overcoming
obstacles and people not understanding who you are are or your identity or why you
choose the things you choose. And I think that's great. So I think
it's very wholesome. It's adorable. You look cute with your little frog butt
in your backpack, and I've I've enjoyed it. But I say so with
the caveat that if you're looking for a tough adventure game, this ain't it.
This is a very sweet, adorable game that allows you to have some
combat and feel good about yourself. Sounds like a nice compliment to Bather's Gate
three. What is a dense adventure game? This is a palate cleanser.
Also, it's very dewy. It does have dialogue, but predominantly you're fighting
bugs, like predominantly you are in the midst And then every once in a
while you talk to someone and they say that they never really thought you would
make it and you tell them to eat shit. That's kind of the main
two halves of this game. Cool thing else, I'll say real quick,
Pickman four one hundred percent of it forty five hours and Pickman four. That
game kicks so much ass. It is so much better than I expected.
And that's I played every Pickman before and enjoyed them all before. This one
is the best one. It is. I would have played another forty five
hours of it. It was so much fun. I could play it on
not Steam Deck, but on the Switch. Yeah. Is it a good
switch game? Or did you play it somewhere else? I like it?
No, I mean like, is it a good switch game? Does that
make sense? Oh? Yeah, yeah, Like I played some on TV
and it but it's not it's not this big, like you know, I
could see the argument like Tears the Kingdom or something where it's like, oh,
it's this big epic adventure and all this stuff. Yeah yeah, and
four is like, I know it came from you know, GameCube and what
we use kind of portable issue, but you know, it doesn't need to
be It doesn't need to be on a big screen to be appreciated. I
played probably eighty percent of it undocked, portable, and just what a fucking
delight. It is so good. It's a great game too. If you
just want to put something on in the background, have it on back there
while you're playing. There's a lot of story to take in everything. It
just keeps you super engaged the entire time. Never got an old consestly felt
like was making progress. It's a It's an absolute delight. My number two
of the year with a bullet for sure. I love that. I think
Mike, we should probably play it because it's gonna come up for Goadi and
I want to make sure we're paired. Yeah, so I'll I'll give that
a whirl. You get a dog, that's that's a pro. Does it
as an astronaut's helmet? Is it? What gives the pickman when you leave
them behind? No, you don't. Any pickman he helps. They can
all hop on him. So if you want to go across a lake or
something, you hop on and all the pickmen jump on Ochi and then OCHI
will dog paddle over and like all the pickman and you are writing him.
Oh, it's the fucking best, so cute. Yeah, there's several dogs
in that game. I'm not sure. It's always interesting. It's too early
to ask me if like the games I played this week will come up with
GODI because really good stuff could hit and it could be bumped down, so
you just never really no, But I would say I'll probably do another wholesome
category, So I think these could come up in that space. I don't
know if they're like Godie worthy, but they are absolutely like category worthy.
Yeah, I can already tell, like Balder's Gate is definitely gonna come up,
I'm sure in Game of the Year discussions. And despite the fact that
I've only played, you know, a couple of hours of it or whatever,
and I'm not going to play more, it's not gonna be one.
I'm gonna like argue hard against because it's I can recognize the obvious quality.
Yes, you will, you'll argue. You'll start stabbing at it the second
we're like, we think Balder's Gate should be higher than Pickman for okay,
well, okay, okay, though we're gonna say some way crazier. But
I could have the Pickman versus Balder's Gate conversation. But let's not get crazy
with perhaps other switch games and Boulder's Gate there are, then we might have
some. There are people who would. I'm not saying I'm one of them.
There are people who, by the end of Balder's Gate three, I
could see saying that, not Fire's Gate related, just in general. I
don't want to meet these people. They're a little out. No, they
can't come in. I'm The only other thing I'm playing is I have Total
War Warhammer three's Shadow of Change dealc which I know you're both cream your jeans
for. I creamed a couple times. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I
can't wait. I'll talk about that more on the next episode. We have
to work towards it. Uh. Oh cool, Do you too want to
do some emails? Yeah, Jake, pick it up here we're back.
Yeah, okays, this is Joe, This is Joe Biden. Let me
do my Biden, my best Biden impression. I do voices only if it's
President Alight us with the taft William Taft. Yeah there was. Yeah,
we're coming for you. I'm just doing like Grover Cleveland. All right,
come on, gotta get job, ned van Buren. I'm gonna cut your
neds often keep them for myself. Give them, would say nads, some
of them that you have to change it. William Harding, Yeah, oh
dude, Oh that's easy. McKinley, Oh, McKinley is tough one.
That's a good. Ye. Gave me Hi, please, Hi, please
have here, please hair balls please JFK now, hair I'd like to have
you on neds please, that'd be great. Ask not what you add,
what your testicles can do for this country? Trump vice versa. No,
I don't. I don't know how to trump. God. I love it's
it's stupendous. I love. I love your neds. That'd be great.
Give them so those guy's balls that I gotta have these balls. Saw these
guy's balls, and saw these guy's balls. I saw this guy's balls.
I actually come and think of it. I don't know what. There's a
Simpsons episode with Bush Senior and he's like, we gotta get that guy's balls,
and how he spoke right, he was fairly. I get it,
but I want those balls. I'll get them. That's what he talks like.
That's my best impression. But I'm really bad at impressions. Yeah,
I think we all might be to the Persians pretty spot on. He just
did twelve that's true. Yeah, what is this Persian golf sport everybody keeps
talking about. I'm not talking about Persian tennis. If you want to write
into fire Escape, you can send questions, comments, concerns. Uh,
you can. You can rash Mary for not wanting one hundred twenty five Ki.
No, no, no, it's not that she doesn't want it.
It's that she doesn't need it, and neither just Mike, I understand the
value of a dollar. Yeah, you're still got a touch Mary, value
of a dollar. You just want to eat poops so bad eat a I
don't do it for fifty cents, honestly on the dollar. If the turd
was gabbos, then yes, I'd eat it for no less than five no
less than five figures. I'm gonna give you exactly ten thousand dollars. I
couldn't work you down. Yeah, no question. It's not the yearly thing.
It's the one time, one time. That's post tax. I don't
think the government's gonna tax eating twenty bucks for one rabbit pellet twenty No,
I'm not doing for twenty bucks. That's something like kid on a playground eating
worms. Shit, I'm not lowering myself to that. Shove your face on
it sounds like a very specific memory like that whe when Gary, when Gary
tells you that your mom and him had sex on the playground, So then
you're like, oh, Gary, I bet you wouldn't eat this worm poop
And then Gary, I'm just pretending it was like an act combody else you
had. Oh okay, and then Gary comes in the next day with a
worm and you have to eat a ship, and this is Barlow gets pissed.
No, no, I would need a hefty sum for any any poop
eating you. Getting right into Fireskipe casting gmail dot com for questions, we
got a couple tonight. Uh. We did shorten this one a bit because
there was a longer example, but uh we got one here, more video
game oriented one to kick things off for from Sean from There's a Place called
show Low Arizona. I might be mispronouncing that I like it. I like
it, think I am, But that sounds cool. Mary. Do you
want to read this first one from Sean from Sholo okay fo show showlow Hi
fire Escape. What's the first game you remember finishing when you were younger and
how do you think this affected your current gaming habits? My example, when
I was younger, the one hundred percent SATIS sensation and lack of money for
more games kept me focused on doing everything I could in a game, and
that completionist mindset stuck with me for years. As my love of games grew,
I put one hundred hours into each Fallout three, New Vegas, Skyrim,
Kingdoms of Alamer, Reckoning which Or three, and Assassins Creed Valhalla.
Having Game Pass and getting to play so many different games helps me appreciate shorter
indie games and finally break that completionist mindset. But I struggled to not waste
hours walking all over the map and games like Yakuza and Persona five. Love
the show and love you guys. Thank you, Sean from show Low Arizona.
Thank you. That's a good well, it's a really good one.
I think about that for a bit. If I had to guess, maybe
the first one was like Mario three, but I probably, like if I'm
not kind of like game genie stuff, I feel like I probably learned about
the warp whistles and Mario three and beat that. But that's my guests.
The one I know for sure because I distinctly remember beating it was linked to
the best. I remember just like okay, defeating Ganon and like feeling like
I had been on like a month's long quest or oh my god, it
was forever. I remember waiting for a Stragedy Guide for Christmas, and I
think it took me like two Christmases to actually get the Tragic Guide because my
parents couldn't find it, and so I mean it could have been like over
a year I was trying to beat that game, and I do remember like
finally getting to that Gannon fight and the silver arrows and all that, and
like just in the end where it says that Zelda ending where the credits are
playing, Everyone's waving at you in the town like, oh you did it
link and like I distinctly remember like watching those credits and me like the world.
But I probably beat like an nes platformer or like a Mario three or
something before that. Yeah, mine was the one I vividly remember was Acarina.
I actually didn't finish Linked to the Past until I was older, but
I remember playing Linked to the Past Super Mario Bros. Three. I remember
vaguely playing the first Super Mario Bros. On Anys, but the first one
I remember like vividly like anticipating finishing and then finishing and being proud of it
was Akarina because several times through it, I just got very intimidated with all
the underwater, not just the water temple, but like Jabu Jabu's belly just
for some reason struck me as very dating. Yeah yeah, and it wasn't
carrying her around and like which thing do I throw her in to make her
land on the thing I want her on? Like yeah, thinking back,
and it was so effective at the time and still somewhat today. Everything including
and this is coming off a dungeon where many of the floors were lava in
Dodnggo's cavern, but like everything in Jabu Jabu's Belly felt dangerous, the walls,
the floor, the ceiling because you're in the boomerang fucking membrane stuff that
you got hit with the boomrang and then slash it up like yeah, it's
up. I don't even mean like annoying, although it definitely is not a
well designed dungeon by Zelda standards today or you know what Zelda dungeon standards were
several years ago, But like I just I remember being like, okay,
I'm getting swallowed by this fish. The dungeon is inside an animal that's scary.
At the time I was when that game came out, I was five.
No Acarina would have been ninety seven ninety eight, so I was six
when it came out, so and then I when I started playing it like
for real. Later on even I had to have my brother do Jabu jabu
in the water Temple, and the water Temple just played into my actual real
life fear of deep water, which I largely have gotten over through scuba diving
and confronting it. But I was like, finally actually doing that whole game
myself for the first time, a game that I know better than any other
game I've played in my life. It was definitely like, I think the
thing that, to answer the question, the thing that that instilled in me
was like from software games today, elden Ring. There was a part,
there was a point where I'm like, fuck, I might be this game
might be getting the best of me. And that's not saying you can't find
value in games without pushing through the challenge, because you can get There's other
people I know who played elden Ring completely different than being in a less challenging
way they love that game more than I do. But it was like it's
it's a completionist thing. But it's also like, I do really appreciate when
a game is challenging me and I have to push through, like a really
tough spell Bather's Gate three, I've gotten that in Act one already, and
I'm like appreciating the games so much more. On the other side, x
Com two, it took me eight playthroughs to finally succeed and not just have
to to wipe. I think Acorino was very much my like, Okay,
I get I can get how the sense of the sense of what the fuck
is the word I'm looking for, very obvious word discovery, no satisfaction,
sense of reward, achievement, thank you, holy shit, sense of achievement
I can get from finishing something like that. Instilled that back when I was
like not playing as many games. To Sean's point, I was like,
Okay, I got this. I bought this game. I saved up the
sixty bucks. I'm going to play this at the time, like that was
a big deal when I could buy my own video game when I was that
age, and then just like fighting through it and enjoying it and finding ways
to enjoy the challenge. Was Acarina definitely was the jumping off point for that.
There's probably a couple of examples I can think of, but the best
one, I think is when I was younger having a Sega Genesis and playing
with my sisters and getting a game that we all started competing in and wanting
to be the best. I learned very early on that I'm pretty competitive and
that it was important for me to probably try and obtain the best score.
So Miss pac Man is probably one of the most important games of my childhood,
and I think what it instilled in me was the importance of winning Miss
pac Man against anyone who's a lesser gamer. And that really came into play
during Mike's bachelor party when I beat Dan Reichert's high score in Miss pac Man
at our event and I didn't just keep I got a very important text you
keep talking about, Mike. Yeah, Yeah, forty thousand, two hundred
and fifty as the top score when Dan couldn't beat it, and I do
have photos of the tape that prove it. I think really instilled me as
a as a young girl that I'm a better gamer than Dan and that that
was really meaningful to me. That's the end of my my point. You
beat me, you beat me, fair and square. I will very much
enjoying how like wholesome it was. And then Mary took her turn to just
threshed, No, no, she's right. She's like, I love computing,
but if I lose. No, no, that's it. I was
getting text from my friend who found a miss pac Man place where he's at
this weekend, and look at what the hell. I don't know if this
is going to focus one hundred and seventy fourth. That's my buddy Ross.
He uh, yeah, he did that. He's insane. Yes, he
says, we're out a vacation of a small resort up north and they have
a miss Pacman machine in the lodge. Time to get serious, And then
he got one hundred and seventy four thousand. It's such a good thing to
put in an airbnb for like people coming in. Yeah, no, it's
very smart. We got a lot of use out of that. And Mary,
Mary, I did my fun little gag of oh, I acted like
I ripped the thing and I got the higher thing. But no, I'm
saying right now, Mary, straight at baby was much better than me,
and that so congrats. I'm a sportsman above all else. I'm shocked that
it's going this way. I saved uning for last that I could just watch
you squirm, and he's being the bigger man, and I'm confused. Won
you won? You won? You beat me, you were better just when
you think you locked in down. He's being a good person. Sometimes I
gotta do it every once in a while. You know, five minutes ago
he was talking about hosing babies. Okay, no, Mary, though,
no, fireman, we're doing it so they could go put out fires,
not married. It's from your brain. Well, I just yeah, it's
a good idea. But Mary, this is what he wants to happen.
You know Dan, Well, I would venture. I would venture to say
I know him better, and there are people to know him better than me,
but I know him good enough, well enough to know that. This
is part of the game. Like playing the the the gracious, the deferring
to you card is very much part of continuing what is the point? What
do I gain by lying about wedding when I did? It's not lying,
she's straight up. Being such a benevolent loser is part of Dan's the ongoing
competition just cut throat. Next time he gets his hand on a silver medal,
is still a metal? I feel good about it? Well, thank
you, Sean. Dan. Do you want to read this one from Piston
Honde? Oh? Bisda? I all right, Hey, virus Gape.
A few episodes ago, you said Dan was at a Hot Pockets convention while
he was out. He did say that indulgent a year ago or something when
you were gone, when, oddly, I guess appropriately enough, Vinnie and
Jake were here and I said that Dan, you were at a Hot Pockets
convention and Mary was at a how to Get Better at Miss pac Man training
camp. Oh okay, okay, all right, well okay, so Dan
was at a Hot Pockets convention while he was out, And that got me
to thinking, if you were to go to a invention centered entirely around a
single video game, either a standalone game or a specific entry from an established
franchise, what game would you go with and what kind of panels would you
want to see? For example, I can imagine Dan having a blast with
cos players and speed runners at a Mike Tyson's punch Out convention, Mike relapsing
a ten Ocon and Mary attending a panel where the developers of Hollow Knight discussed
the importance of engaging your audience early by having absolutely nothing of interest happened in
the first twenty minutes. Love the show, Piston Hunda. Piston Hunda is
a very big fan of Piston Hundai. Yeah. I never will forget this,
the fact that you could actually have a convention around Hollow Night because of
the depth in the gameplay and mechanics. Is there one the lore? The
depth? A guy's a bug and he jumps around for a while. Don't
do this, Piston, What the fuck is wrong with you? I'm not
reading your emails anymore? Mary, I was actually asking, is there a
Hollow Night convention? I don't think so, as far as I'm aware.
I think after Silk Song we got ourselves a stew go in. But right
now it's still early on. Okay, So before you guys, are you
let me say, as Piston has pointed out, I have been to a
convention based around one video game. Jake and I went and shot that documentary
at ten o'con, which I maintained was the best work I ever did a
game spot. Jake and I did a really good behind the scenes video about
that. I would one thousand percent go to a convention. It would likely
be in the UK based entirely around Total War as a franchise, or Total
War Warhammer three specifically, or the trilogy Total War Warhammer. I would go
to a panel about each of the twenty seven factions, each of the ninety
faction leaders. I would spend a week there and I would not get enough
of it. It would be fucking nirvana that the geek like. That would
be the geekiest thing I would do, and I would I would find people,
and I would recognize all their the ship that they're wearing, and I
would It would be awesome. I would be lost in the sauce of Total
War war Hammer three. I would say, imagine a wide focus Mario convention
where, okay, in the main like the south hall of the La Convention
Center, if we're going there, is all the mainline Mario games, the
single player you know, like the main big titles, and the people doing
speed running all sorts of stuff like that, like races four, people racing
through Mario six four at the same time, blah blah blah, and then
all the side rooms in Kencha Hall, and everything is like, Okay,
here's the Mario party thing, here's the Mario Kart thing, here's the Mario
tennis thing. Mari havingbbits, Mario We're having Yeah, we're having We're having
tournaments of everything. So here's Larti's wasted the Mario Rabbits room. Sorry,
I don't mean that's is where I would be hanging out drinking. That's thing.
I think there's a wide focus to the Mario thing. There's just so
much and so much single player, multiplayer, speed run all that stuff.
I think that could actually be like that could justify a large convention hall which
just a bunch of Mario shit. It'd be fun. Dang, I think
that would be super fun. I wonder if there's like trying to think of
like something that would be just stupid fun to attend, you know, like
you don't go so much for the game and for like how good it is
at home. I can play that at home. Yeah, I don't come
here to play the game. I come here to like interact with a bunch
of like dumb dumbs and just like have fun and run around. Yeah,
what is the Barbenheimer to your no, no, no, like, what
is the Barbenheimer to your hollow night at home? What is the game thing
that would get you out of your house that you could have at home?
It's crazy. I need like more time to think about it. I feel
like there's got to be a couple like old school games, like something old
that we just think we all agree, this would be very funny if everybody
caused played as this game and it had this whole world around it and it's
just stupid. I like the idea of the Barbenheimer for games just outside of
the convention, Like what is that if you want to do a back to
back thing like flick through the Metal Gear Solid series and then Benjo. Yeah,
yeah, it's two opposite world. What's one game and then the next
series is do one game and then one game? Well, now, first
Mary, you answer, would it be a hollow Night convention? No?
For me, I think it would be something like I have to like think
a little bit more on it, but something that you enjoy an example,
but just something silly and we could all laugh about it later. Think it
wouldn't be important. Okay, it's see, you're going to it all.
Think it's fun. This isn't a single game to evade pistons question a bit.
I could see you go into like a cozy game con Yeah, definitely,
that's not a single game. But I would absolutely go to a convention
that was just about like, you know, comfortable games that I enjoy that
like, have nothing important going on, everyone wears pajamas. Yeah it sounds
fun. Oh yeah, okay, dream Daddy. The convention could be really
fun, just a bunch of like hotties walking around. I'd go to that.
I'd subscribe to that news like where wow, God, Well where was
the address so I know to avoid it was the address world and time God,
so I know how to avoid the line what time does the line form?
Oh God? Or that Devolver? I think a Devolver convention would be
pretty funny, right because I like just the stupidest games, the one with
like the penises fighting general jousting. Yeah, I have a new I have
a new answer. Go on. It would be a convention for Gold and
I and the entire original cast of the movie would have to well hang on,
now, I would go that sounds I think I know where Mike's where
Mike's going, you know what's room up being? The space is a weird,
like you know it, you know it, you know what's room being
the boncohol. Yeah, but Dan, your question, what would be the
Barbeheimer of video games minus like going out for them? What is like two
super opposing games that would kind of sort of compliment one another in a weird
way. So Pa Stranding and Slime Rancher see that. I like that.
I was gonna say, like the world is dying and everyone sucks. Look
at these little slimes. I think I'll catch them with a with a net.
I was gonna say, like heavy rain and conquers bad for a day.
All right, that's a good one. Yeah. I feel like middle
of Yourself is such an obvious Oppenheimer's staying in. They would have to be
like definitely Braide Braid, which is basically Brady Oppenheimer. Okay Oppenheimer. I
mean the story is about Braden Castle Crashers. I'll think them that. I
don't think at all. Yeah, I like that. The Witness and is
Witness Oppenheimer. Yeah, yeah, it has to be right because it smells
its own farts. Oh it's the same person. Witness and Cat Cafe manager
Explosion Man. The working title for Oppenheimer was splosion. Man, what would
uh? What was the uh? What's the shark game? Last year?
Man? Eater? It's like this garbage elden ring right, obviously, checkery
checker. He's got some fucking shit going on in there too. That's very
thoughtful. You got it. You're on the trolley. Yeah, yeah,
that's all right. I'm circling back. Mary. You still face offing with
a bird or did you come up with anything else? Oh? I still
feel comfortable with my Biden concept. I think it would be funny to fill
my fill my suit with newspaper and then try and pass a law that harms
men for some reason, for no reason at all, Give me a little
fucker about it. I'm coming for your balls. I'm gonna outlaw balls.
You're going to try the minute you're sworn in office. They just fall off.
Oh gosh, you got me. She'll dip me out. She doesn't
make any sense. It's just so bad. It's a joke gone horribly awry,
and I ruined the United States. Biden comes out of his comas like,
oh, she got mine too, got them all. I'm coming for
I get you can go for one, you go for all, you know,
And then he goes into the secret room beneath the Oval office, in
which in which Richard Nixon is still in cry asleep and a in a in
a cyberpunk coffin, and he comes out with one metal eye and he's like
time to get back everybody's balls. And then and then he pulls out a
pulls out a penis pistol, and then it goes to work. My old
penis pistol. I always keep one handing also to get them back. I
charge per ball. So, uh, you need do nothing? Do you
have to? No, you can live a full life with one. I
mean with neither, right, Like if I if I'm a tragic accident tomorrow,
you're functional with both. If that's what we're talking about, Yeah,
I mean I just have one list thing that like hurt real bad if something
hits him, right? Are you saying you would get them removed because it's
more convenient to write about entirely? But I'm saying if some like factory accident
having tomorrow like and just my balls were removed, I'm what I'm doing.
I'm sorry there's been a factory accident. Works rights, right, Dick,
what factory I just imagining imagining Dan waddling up his driveway, but like Bianca
and just bleeding from his cross, there was an accident. The okay,
you guys are gonna hung up on the how let's just say I'm going on
my walk in the morning and dog bites my balls off. A dog bites
my balls off. I don't. Let's forget the factory. A dog bites
my scrow them off. How did the dog get in the factory. There's
no factory. There's no factory. A dog just ain't my scrowed them What
kind of factory is making dogs? Oh my god, you guys are being
ridiculous bit off. Nothing else happened at all. Fuck, I don't know
tomorrow. A dog eats my scrotum? How is my life difference the dog
factor? Buck? My bass, my boss buck? How they're gont suckt
boners? Right? And then you're like, I have no idea, no
issues? Well right, like isn't it is the only consequence that I just
can't have kids, which I don't want anyway, So like then like or
the balls is completely superfluous. I have no idea. If it's a clean
rip, yeah, just it's gone and its just like I just do a
rambo and I put a bunch of gunpowder where my balls were and I light
it. It's catterized. I just have a dick. How does the dog
get involved? Does he light it? It's Kansas there. While I've been
walking around, there's a lot of dogs that are like, oh, that
dog's gonna kill me, Like no, no, no, no, no,
hold on, I think not. And I don't know, but I
think heavily. Assume coming would not work the same without balls. Wait what
it's the it's I mean that's where sperm production happens, right, But can't
you just shoot blanks? I guess you could still out. I guess you
could feel it and get a boner and stuff. You can feel it and
get a boner and stuff, and you might be honest. I'm fine.
Yeah, Yeah, this is a hindrance. Yeah. They hurt so bad
if something like brushes against them. God, men have it so hard.
You know how many times razor Just that's on my balls, and it's like,
that's how I wake up, That's how I start my day as a
dog stepping on my balls. Daisy does that. It sucks and then my
chest and sma. Hopefully one day they'll make a movie that really addresses the
trials and tribulations of men. It'll be our Barbie. Finally, God turns,
I'm gonna make it. I'm gonna pitch. I'm gonna pitch. It's
gonna be Sound of Freedom, and then Barbie, You're gonna be our movies.
I've been hearing a lot about Sound of Freedom here in Kansas. Jesus
yea which a woman hating. I'm lost context. We talked during the bricks,
we did well, We're gonna keep it. I assume, no,
not parts. I also sang most of Monster Mash, not the specific parts
about specific people in our lives, right, right, right, I'm keeping
all the names. What do you mean you are Jake's editing. Yeah.
Yeah, he's the fupeteer here. Jake Decker is Jake. Jakes don't got
all of our balls and advice because we've said so many names. I can't
wait for cancel us, can't wait for cool Judge Jake again and December or
whatever. Fuck he's a jerk. I aw, I don't think he's cool.
I don't think he's behind the scenes stuff. He's not a cool Judge.
Rejuvenating Judge we gotta make some new decisions. We gotta mix it up,
gotta change it. No, I want cool judge J again. I
can do a character if you want. I'm really good at voices accents.
Oh my god, I mean all the presidents. You cycled between every president
yeah, uh huh. Get a lot of mustaches going yep, yeah,
that's my uh. And that's the email section. Thank you Piston, and
thank you Sean. Uh. Like I said you you can rent through fireskit
cast at gmail dot com s and some questions. We've gotten quite a lot
of quasi corrections saying we should have used cotton candy. People said you could
just the email said we could have access to water. So he's pour water
into the tub with the cotton candy. You just drink most of it.
The straws. Where the fuck? We're all of you? And I think
that's against the spirit in which the that's the that's the galaxy brain solve.
I like it. Mary. Where can people go for some hot threads?
I think they can go to fire Escape merch cast dot fireskate merch dot com.
You can get some fucking sweet shirts, some mugs people have been rioting.
I'll have you know in my friend's circle, and by people who have
been writing, I mean two people, my fiance and my good friend Rachel,
my good friend fighting for this merch people here specifically there pissed that there's
no banana yellow crop top. Oh you want a banana yellow crop top.
I might be able to add such a thing you. I think you can.
But go to Fireskate March dot com for some fucking sick rags. Also
working on new designs that I'm very excited about. But we'll get there.
When we get there. There's new stuff in the works. It's stuff in
the works making some tweaks and getting it ready for full production. Dan,
what can people do on Spotify the five Stars wherever you get your podcasts?
Easy? Thank click, couple of buttons there help us out. Other than
that, where I'm at is are we doing that? Are we doing the
plug thing? That? Did that? Conflate this giant bomb dot com?
For the point people to one thing, I would say, bat Grub,
it's our Blake club thing where we play the worst games ever. And Grub
is playing Batman Dark Tomorrow for the GameCube, which he is saying is the
worst game he has ever played, and This is a man who just got
done playing bubbsy three D on Giant Bomb. So check out the Batman Dark
Tomorrow stuff we've been doing on Giant Bomb. It's been a hoot. Mary,
what about you. I'm strumming on Twitch most mondays. I've been playing
a lot of these wholesome games because of the Wholesome Fest on Steam. I
think there's like up to ninety percent off some wholesome games on Steam. So
I've been loving that. Yeah, So Twitch is usually where you can find
me. I'm at Polygon. Got a lot of stuff up about Bather's Gate
three, got some more games coming down the pike, got Armored Cores six,
got some Total War Warhammer three DLC good stuff, got some blasphemous two.
Got some some Starfield not too far from now, about a month from
now last if you pre order what September one, getting ready for that,
it's like to try that out. Got a lot of a lot of good
stuff going up on polygon dot com. A lot of movies and stuff,
and continuing Oppenheimer coverage and TV stuff as well. That's our episode. It's
episode sixty one. Who what are we gonna do for Episode one? Hundred.
We did it. We got some time, We got plenty of time.
We're just doing the math quick. It will not happen around Xmas,
No, not at all. I'm just trying to do some basic math right
now, which I'm worse at than complicated math. This will go up on
the fourteenth. People listen to this on day one of August. So stands
to reason two per month from none. That'll take. I put a calendar
in the discord. If you want to see like a little I tried to
like I'm predicted it. You put a shark with heaving breasts with a bikini
on. I got you, what a nice thing. I clicked over to
see the information and then did not get information. Nope, I mean we
got got some information. I don't know if that's the word for it.
What does a shark look like with huge boobs? I guess in a technical
sense that information. The MSB got some information, if you know what I
mean, my Hardy's Bank Bank. I don't know. It'll be like it'll
be like two and a half years since until we're at episode one hundred,
We've we've got tons of plans already. It'll be great. We gotta figure
out is the plan. Yeah, we're ten. Yes, that's the plan.
We'll see whether it'll happen. We gotta starry. We'll make some arrangements
here soon. Yes, it'll be good. It'll be fun. Judge stuff
brought. I was coughing. Oh chick. Fire escapecasts on YouTube? Oh
yes, follow fire escapecasts on YouTube because that's where we will be. That's
where the archive will be. Is because we have a YouTube channel now,
so check it out there. We'll do it live again. We don't have
a Twitch channel, so maybe that'll just be the usual thing. We'll have
to talk about that the YouTube. Definitely check out fire Escape cast on YouTube.
That's where it will live. But then we will give you updates on
words and be streamed and all that stuff. And of course you can just
listen to it here on this speed and then the YouTube channels also where Mary
and I are playing through Resue before remake, we brought Knevel over to the
fire Escape YouTube, so if nothing else, you're still getting notifications for when
we put up the new episodes of that show. Mary I also put up
our short of Dan talking about possibly eating a turret on YouTube, just because
it's funny. I've been I've been playing around with our content. You know,
if you see some weird shit on our socials that I was in there,
you just beat and rescue before we make you just beat well heafe.
Yeah. It was super fun. It was really it was really funny because
like I was kind of at the end of my rope where I was like,
man, this episode has been long and exhausting, and then it was
like, now you have to beat a man who is kind of a centipede.
Sake, I'm not ready for this amount of like pain. But the
boss fight wasn't nearly as hard as the Trebuche. I was not prepared for
the difficulty that the Trebuche brought me. Yeah, I can repeat that area
like time annoying. Yeah, I gave you that guy ass handed to me
those barrels. Yeah, I blame Capcom for my back. I said that,
and Mike was like, you don't need to do No, you just
don't listen. Just don't listen to Mike. It's taken. We're in the
sixteenth season of that show and you still follow my every word I do.
God help me. Okay, thank you everybody. That was episode sixty one.
Thanks for joining. We'll be back in a couple of weeks with episode
sixty two. More games, more movies. Hopefully i'll see Dead Racketing Heart
one by then, a lot of a lot of life changes, got some
stuff to catch up on. It'll be a fun one. Everyone we have
seen Barber, don't fucking miss it. Will be here, or I swear
to God, I will find you. I will come to your house.
Send me your address first, and then I'll come to your house. I'll
be there if you don't show up for sixty one security number and your address,
and a list of your fears, yes, list of your weaknesses too,
if you have any like achilles heels. Like literally, if your heel's
weak, tell me I'll get I'll get a flail. It'll be fun.
Love it all right by everybody may see May the st style