WEBVTT

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Welcome to the two seventeen Recovery Broadcast. If you don't make mistakes, you

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won't learn. With your host Corey
Winfield, you know how you know fish

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as bad as you can't put it
on pizza and special guest Justin Burke.

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I said something boy, that to
our master radio broadcaster, and he said

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that he didn't hear nothing got your
ass. It is the twenty second of

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February twenty twenty four. My name's
Corey Winfield. I'm Justin Burke. This

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is the Tear seventeen Recovery Podcast,
Marty, and now we're going to do

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one this weekend. But we have
a kid kids give you busy bro Mash

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eight weeks old. Oh man,
this is good stuff. He's finally turning

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into like a person, because like
last week he was on my lap and

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I turned him over and I have
man tit and he was like he looked

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like something out of The Walking Dead, which I know is the show you

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don't watch. No I don't,
but he looked like a zombie, like

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just probably his head was just like
like look like I'm just trying to eat

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me. Man. I was like, Marnie, I was like, do

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we have this thing child ours is
a satan. I got no satan.

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It's not in my house. Jesus
is a big fan. I'm a big

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fan of Jesus. So in a
two way street there, But you're actually

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wearing your two seventeen recovery Jesus is
a big fan shirt today. Any compliments

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on that? Not yet? No. I was like wearing that once in

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Costco Costco. Somebody am I saying
that right? Justin Yeah? I think

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so Costco. Yeah. Anyway,
this lady comes up and she's like,

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oh my gosh, I love your
shirt. And she can tell she just

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got out of church. She's like, I'm going to listen to your podcast.

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I said, hold on, hold
on, don't maybe just listen to

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it yet. I don't know if
it's for you. Jesus has a sense

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of humor. Did you explain the
podcast to her? No. I just

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said, well, it's just not
just hold the excitement just a little bit

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and not tell her we had an
app and that she can listen to all

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the episodes on there. I didn't
say any of that. I just said

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it's not for everyone, is what
I might have said. We did a

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podcast about it. I think that
was in twenty twenty two. So if

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you want to go back and find
that one, I think it says lady

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at Costco. I don't know something
like that. It's the title. But

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it was a fun weekend. We
went and did the Ats Beach Volleyball Tournament.

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Yep, we did not play.
Nope, because A I'm forty six

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years old and I'm not trying to
blow out a knee. Right, I'm

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overweight and in my mind I'm still
twenty three and as they call it,

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fit as a fiddle. Yeah something
like that. Yeah, but in reality,

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I'm not so like that. And
I saw Kim, which we should

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call make sure she's okay. Yeah, I was thinking about that because Kim

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was diving. See Kim in her
mind is twenty three, and it is

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a fiddle too, because I saw
her diving for so many balls and that

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would have been me. Yeah.
I even took a video of it.

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Yeah, your video is horrible?
Was it? Yeah? The quality of

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it's really bad? But whatever?
Can all be heroes? Not an expert?

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Nope, I'm sure or not.
Yeah, if you watch the recap

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video you'll see what You'll be like, Oh, that's the justin video because

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ouch, Yeah, it looks like
you did it with a phone that came

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out in two thousand and four.
Ooh, I know, I haven't played

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with the studience since you set it
up. He zoomed in a little too

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far, Son, a little too
far, and you saved that for the

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post post production, like I can
zoom in and makes a little bit better.

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But yeah, so we had fun
though, and Kim diving Dirty pictures

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are at two seventeen Recovery dot Com. Yep. Then I took iticture and

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I didn't even realize it because with
our cameras you can take if you put

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it in portrait mode, you can
kind of drop down the uh aperture.

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I don't know, I really know
what I'm talking about. The f thing.

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I know on a camera it's like
one point seven anyway, it makes

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the back ground blurry yep, and
you focus just on that person. And

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I did that when as Kim was
walking over there and bloop, what do

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you see a booty? A booty
is a booty in the picture. I

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was like oops. First I thought
you took it and I was like justin

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and I was like, oh no, that was me because I was taking

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pictures of Kim. But so,
guys, if you're like, oh,

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should I go check out those beach
photos, you might want to. I'm

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just saying, not that I'm taking
credit for it. I should do better.

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You should. I should do better. I didn't take any photos.

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I took the video. Yeah,
good job, Justin. But you were

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on the grill. I was,
and by the time I got done,

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I was hot. I was sweaty, exhausted. Yeah, and Max Power

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And because they weren't really hot dogs, they were like frank Furters or something,

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yeah, something like that. They
were delicious though. People loved them

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and Max Power here in Traverse City. They wanted to support the recovery community,

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so they donated a ton of them, so everybody was well fed and

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things. Again to Max Power for
that. That was very sweet. And

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we love organizations that support the recovery
community and having fun and recovery. That's

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what we were doing, and we
had a pretty good time. It was.

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It was interesting though, because I
am because your daughter. It was

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Okay, hold on, let's rewind
it just a little bit. Because we

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did a podcast last week for Recovery
Dads. It was such a good episode.

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You probably think different, but it
was such a great episode. We

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talked about so much cool stuff and
so much father stuff and daughter stuff in

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your case, and then we had
like power surges. Yeah. And it

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was crazy because I almost recorded the
episode to the board, but then I

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was like, nah, I we'll
record it right into Adobe. And then

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Adobe crashed and it kept crashing because
we kept having power searches. So I

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think Adobe is like, I give
up, because normally you can just pull

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it back up, open it and
says, do you want to pull up

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that last thing you're working on?
Yeah, well you'll try that for a

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week a week, that's how good
this episode was. Yeah. I was

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like, you're sure you just don't
want to record. Nope, I'm going

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to recover it. Yeah, it's
not happening. But you were complaining last

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week because you had your daughter over, not this last weekend, but the

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weekend before. You're with your daughter
and your mom and yep. So your

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daughter was being not nice to you, lazy. Yeah, And you said

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that she was having the girl problems
of the twenty eight day thing. Yep.

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And I said, justin lay off
of her, she's feeling like crap.

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She's young. This is still relatively
new to her and it's uncomfortable,

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and you're like, yeah, but
I was chasing the dog around trying to

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make the dog get the cat,
and of course she's telling you to stop

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it, dad, it's annoying.
What are you two years old? Justin?

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And then Mitch chimed in and then
you're like, and she wouldn't even

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help my mom clean out her storage
closet, Like, just shit, your

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mom's been piling up in there for
the last two or twenty thirty years.

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Of course she doesn't want to help. That's your mom's job. She should

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be doing that her damn self.
If you clean that out, then you

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don't have to get your son and
your granddaughter and their kin and their friends

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from school to help. Like,
you don't have to do any of that,

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just do it yourself. So we
were just like on your ass about

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that, and I told you that, you know, you need to google

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and you like pulled out your phone. You're about to google it. And

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that's the best part of it.
Yeah, And I was like minstrel cycles

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or something, I don't remember what
it was about. It was funny and

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we got your ass and then yeah, we don't have it. So anyway,

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now we're here in this past weekend, and yeah, how was your

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experience with her? How would you
rate that on the scale of one to

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time. I mean, she helped
out Mitch's child, Logan helped out Parker

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was the only one who didn't.
He was just kind of their sleep but

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sorry, he's eight weeks old in
the past. And it was fine until

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I look over at our table and
there's a half eaten apple on it and

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not just like set down with a
skin side, No, just set down

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where you just like take bites out
of it. Just And one thing about

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apples I've learned, actually I probably
learned this when I was like four.

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Is there sticky? Yeah? Yeah, they're no, they can't. They

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are sticky, and if you just
put them right down on something, you're

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gonna need to wipe that off.
So I look around, I just see

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this apple and I was like,
you've got to be kidding me. It's

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like, who just laid their apple
on our table? Get all sticky and

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all dirty? And here comes your
daughter, Ma Mo. I was like,

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is this your apple? Yeah?
I said, what the hell you

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putting it on the table that's your
table, said something like that, and

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she's like, oh, I didn't
know. I was like, oh my

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god, you didn't know. And
then it all takes me back to like

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three weeks ago when we're here in
the we're here in the office, and

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here comes justin with the tooth missing. She went to the dentist that day

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and they're like, we're taking this
song, bitch out, and your daughter

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comes in with where'd you guys go? Jersey mikes, you guys want somewhere.

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Oh, and you got some kind
of sandwich for her with onions all

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over it. It's great to bring
to the office whatever. So she gets

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in here, she starts opening her
sandwich right there at the front desk,

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and and because she likes juggling and
it's not very good at it, she

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drops her sandwich right on the floor. And you always defend her. Now,

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she opened the sandwich, so it
wasn't just ooh, I dropped my

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sandwich. It's wrapped up. No, no, I'm talking about she had

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it in her hands, started juggling
it or whatever she was doing, and

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dropped it on the floor. I
said, what the hell are you doing?

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First of all, you're stinking the
place up, and you're dropping food

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on the floor. And then ten
minutes later, I think my son is

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here and she I don't know,
for what reason, She's trying to paint

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the ceiling with sticky stuff. I
don't know. She takes her straw and

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does something silly and just pop just
flies up into the ceiling, all over

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my son, all over me.
The person stand next to me, and

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I was like, what are you
doing? And then the apple thing on

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top of that. Now you see
what I deal with all the time,

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I think, because I was like, you know what, I don't think

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I'm on team Justine anymore. No, my mom said thank you for finally

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saying something to her. Yeah,
because it was like you, Corey always

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defends her. I'm always the bad
guy. Yeah, always. I think

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I'm just off team Burke, just
off team b Yeah, I'm just off

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team Burke. I can't handle either
one of you. Don't ever bring your

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mouth to an event. That really
pushed me over the top, like what

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the hell's going on now? But
it's it's cool to see family and friends

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help out and for your daughter,
and for for Logan Mitch's son to be

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there too, that was really cool. There's pictures of him. He's the

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one wearing the sober shirt. If
you go to two seventeen recovery dot com

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and you want to go click through
the photos he's doing like the Superman like

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I guess it'd be more like bodybuilder, Yeah, bodybuilder, bodybuilder pose.

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And he had like one good serve
he served it. It went over the

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net just barely and just landed.
It was an ace, and the very

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next serve went into the trees.
I don't know how you can't find I

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don't know, some people just aren't
athletic, but you just find that same

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point, you know, and just
keep serving him up. But not him.

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He just I didn't see anything like
it. It's like the reverse of

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athleticism. It's I don't even know. It's so opposite that I just there's

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not even a word for it.
And if there was, you'd make it

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up. So yeah, But but
it was nice to see family members and

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stuff like that helping out and the
people out there, you know, in

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recovery, right, like learning that
they can have fun. And then you

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know what was interesting. I kind
of wrote a blog about it a little

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bit and a sentence about it.
Yeah, on the way back, you

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know, from the event, my
daughter looked at me and said, you

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know that, I actually had a
lot of fun. I met a lot

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of really cool people in recovery.
I hope they stay there like you decided

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to do so that way they can
have just a fulfilling life. Yeah.

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Yeah, that kind of made me, said a little bit statistically speaking,

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we know that not everybody will make
it. We hope that everybody will make

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it, but we know deep down
inside not everybody will make it. And

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I had a couple of things this
weekend happened, and I'm just like,

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are you kidding me? Man?
I'm not talking about my house flying apart,

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but I got a message and it's
like, oh, so and so

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is doing this and blah blah blah. And I'm like, well, I

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can't do anything about it, right
and until this person can understand like there's

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nothing wrong. And again, how
was at this point too, But there's

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nothing wrong with never drinking again.
Yeah, but that addiction just gets your

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ass and it just grabs you.
And this person's at the point where addiction

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has tricked them and alcohol will do
this like no other. Let you think

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you have control, Yep, oh, I have control. I can control

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it. I only drink on the
weekend there's a point after I stopped drinking

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every single day where I did three
months not drink again, and then it

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was out of control. But then
I'd pull it together and then I'd have

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three months. So just by saying
I only drink on the weekends is not

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a good excuse, because you're still
not in control. No, when that

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alcohol goes down your throat, you
are not in control. I'm just gonna

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00:14:37.159 --> 00:14:43.960
have two. Ah No, you're
not. No, because you are not

206
00:14:43.080 --> 00:14:50.240
in control. Now you can have
two at the restaurant. But the only

207
00:14:50.279 --> 00:14:52.480
reason you can have two at the
restaurant is because you know that you're stopping

208
00:14:52.480 --> 00:14:56.200
at the liquor store on the way
home, or you already got a bunch

209
00:14:56.200 --> 00:14:58.320
of stuff at home. Yep.
But you'll put on a front in front

210
00:14:58.320 --> 00:15:01.200
of people what I used to do. Oh yeah, I'll have a beer.

211
00:15:01.440 --> 00:15:05.960
Yeah see, I just drink a
beer. Oh boy, I couldn't

212
00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:07.399
wait. I'd be making excuses I
had to leave early. Well, I

213
00:15:07.440 --> 00:15:11.399
got it this. I could pick
up this food from a cat or it

214
00:15:11.440 --> 00:15:16.480
didn't matter. You make dumb stuff, dumb ass excuses, the dumbest excuses

215
00:15:16.559 --> 00:15:18.919
you'll ever hear. Yeah, like
this makes no sense. It's eleven o'clock

216
00:15:18.919 --> 00:15:22.480
and night. He's got to pick
up cat food on he's got to go.

217
00:15:22.559 --> 00:15:24.639
He only had one beer that was
weird, but he likes to drink.

218
00:15:26.440 --> 00:15:31.039
I'm driving, Toya, you know. But that's that's the truth,

219
00:15:31.159 --> 00:15:33.919
you know. So just to say
that I only drink on the weekend or

220
00:15:33.960 --> 00:15:39.080
this or that. Nah, And
there's nothing wrong with thever drinking again,

221
00:15:39.360 --> 00:15:45.000
But it's so scary because a I
don't want to be one the one with

222
00:15:45.039 --> 00:15:48.840
the problem, right, because that's
what they say, it's your problem.

223
00:15:48.960 --> 00:15:52.639
Okay, Well it doesn't work that
way. That's the alcohol company's play.

224
00:15:52.799 --> 00:15:56.000
Drink responsibly. Yeah, well you
weren't drinking responsible? No, no,

225
00:15:56.000 --> 00:15:58.840
no, no. There are people
who can drink, can have a beer

226
00:16:00.200 --> 00:16:03.360
and go home. There's the people
and they go to the casino like ten

227
00:16:03.399 --> 00:16:07.320
bucks, go home. Yep.
There's people that can probably smoke a joint,

228
00:16:07.919 --> 00:16:11.840
go home. But then there's people
that can't. There's people that need

229
00:16:11.879 --> 00:16:15.519
to be high twenty four seven.
Yeah, the minute they wake up,

230
00:16:15.519 --> 00:16:18.440
they're blazing up. You know.
It's funny how you say that, because

231
00:16:18.440 --> 00:16:22.240
my brother just went to jail and
he finally got a hold of my mom

232
00:16:22.720 --> 00:16:30.559
and he's in jail with one of
his friends and got yo as my brother's

233
00:16:30.600 --> 00:16:34.960
friend hopped on the phone for a
minute and he was like, I've never

234
00:16:36.039 --> 00:16:40.559
seen Josh that sick looking. I
say his name on here, it don't

235
00:16:40.600 --> 00:16:44.720
matter. Yeah, you know,
she's never seen him that sickly looking.

236
00:16:45.279 --> 00:16:47.840
He was like, dude was sick. He was like, I was giving

237
00:16:47.879 --> 00:16:51.759
him my trades, trying to get
him back healthy, you know, and

238
00:16:51.799 --> 00:16:56.039
it's like, well, that's what
our addiction does, you know, especially

239
00:16:56.080 --> 00:17:00.919
when you know you're going away and
you're like, screw it, I'm gonna

240
00:17:00.960 --> 00:17:03.920
go to jail. Anyways. That's
a sad way to look at it,

241
00:17:03.960 --> 00:17:11.279
you know. Yeah, I didn't
care for jail. A jail didn't fix

242
00:17:11.359 --> 00:17:15.799
me, but it was the the
whole having consequences and realizing that I could

243
00:17:15.839 --> 00:17:19.640
have killed somebody. Yeah, that's
what really kind of turned it for me,

244
00:17:19.720 --> 00:17:23.160
and thinking that could be in prison
for thirty five years or someone I

245
00:17:23.160 --> 00:17:30.000
don't even remember. And that's what
alcohol does. It will you think you

246
00:17:30.079 --> 00:17:33.480
have control, and then you get
those three months and if you drink like

247
00:17:33.519 --> 00:17:37.839
I did every single day, like
tons and tons, and then you stop,

248
00:17:37.400 --> 00:17:41.839
your tolerance goes down and so when
you get that sober time in there

249
00:17:42.559 --> 00:17:45.680
and you go back to drinking,
you go back just as hard, but

250
00:17:47.160 --> 00:17:51.839
your tolerance isn't built up, so
you black out. And there was no

251
00:17:52.000 --> 00:17:53.759
just have a beer for me.
There was no just do two shots or

252
00:17:53.839 --> 00:17:59.400
one shot. It was getting drunk. There's no point of drinking unless I

253
00:17:59.440 --> 00:18:03.480
can get And that was the numb
pain. That was to numb sorrow,

254
00:18:03.799 --> 00:18:08.720
which only created more pain and more
sorrow, and it made me broke,

255
00:18:08.880 --> 00:18:12.839
and it's a vicious cycle. Almost
killed me. How many people do you

256
00:18:12.839 --> 00:18:18.200
think are in our prison system right
now that honestly blacked out and killed somebody

257
00:18:21.039 --> 00:18:27.440
hm driving? Say eight eight percent? Yeah, I'd probably say a little

258
00:18:27.519 --> 00:18:34.839
higher. It could be probably fifteen, like eighty percent or eighty five percent

259
00:18:36.119 --> 00:18:38.279
people. I'm just throwing numbers out
there. I have no idea. And

260
00:18:38.359 --> 00:18:45.160
our prisons are from drugs. Yeah, yeah, the drug and alcohol related

261
00:18:45.200 --> 00:18:48.119
incidents. I'll cause the drug,
So that should be limped in there altogether.

262
00:18:48.880 --> 00:18:52.200
Well, I said it that way
some way listeners would understand that,

263
00:18:52.799 --> 00:18:56.440
because some still view it separately.
You know, Yeah, no, I'll

264
00:18:56.480 --> 00:19:00.960
call it is a drug and yeah, well but it's lee shut off,

265
00:19:00.079 --> 00:19:03.960
So sleep with it. So ito's
weed in almost all states now. But

266
00:19:04.960 --> 00:19:10.160
whatever, Still a drug still alters
your mind. You still want to do

267
00:19:10.400 --> 00:19:15.960
things that you would normally do.
Yeah, and sugars. Sugar is legal

268
00:19:15.960 --> 00:19:18.359
too. Yeah, that's horrible.
But I wouldn't eat a gallon of ice

269
00:19:18.359 --> 00:19:22.839
cream a day. Why not?
Because it's bad for me. It'll kill

270
00:19:22.880 --> 00:19:25.960
me. Oh but you're gonna go
ahead and drink that every day. Yeah,

271
00:19:25.960 --> 00:19:30.480
but it's legal. Go get some
ice cream. Let's go, right,

272
00:19:30.720 --> 00:19:34.079
you know, I'm down twelve thirteen
pounds something like that. Did you

273
00:19:34.079 --> 00:19:37.799
ever try those yaz bars that I
told you about? No? Why not?

274
00:19:37.960 --> 00:19:41.279
Because I got fruit? Oh well, these are Greek yogurt bars that

275
00:19:41.279 --> 00:19:44.720
are actually really good. I have
no time for that. I eat fruit

276
00:19:45.640 --> 00:19:52.240
and chicken. Fruit and chicken that's
oatmeal, and brown rice and brown rice.

277
00:19:52.039 --> 00:19:56.519
Nice. Yeah. Yeah, because
I went to the doctor last month.

278
00:19:56.640 --> 00:20:00.680
Last it was in June. I
was clocking and then at three oh

279
00:20:00.960 --> 00:20:07.640
five day and then I went a
month later. But that whole month I

280
00:20:07.720 --> 00:20:11.119
wasn't doing good. It was just
after fourth of July is when I was

281
00:20:11.160 --> 00:20:15.000
like, all right, I really
have to start changing things. And I

282
00:20:15.000 --> 00:20:18.160
think you guys are hearing me.
Bitch less about Oh, I feel nauseous,

283
00:20:18.319 --> 00:20:22.359
Oh I feel sick. Yeah,
because it was like every day,

284
00:20:22.440 --> 00:20:26.319
dudude. It was driving me nuts, and I tried not eating breakfast and

285
00:20:26.400 --> 00:20:29.880
this and that, and then nothing
worked until I was like, Okay,

286
00:20:30.599 --> 00:20:34.799
I'm going need some oatmeal in the
morning. Do that and like whole weeat

287
00:20:36.200 --> 00:20:41.039
stuff. Made a whole wheat pizza
yesterday. It was good because I put

288
00:20:41.079 --> 00:20:45.440
a lot of cheese on it,
a lot of sauce, a lots of

289
00:20:45.480 --> 00:20:48.400
sugar sauce on it. Nah,
but it was it was not good.

290
00:20:48.480 --> 00:20:52.960
Really. Marnie's side was horrible because
she has had bacon and mushrooms on it,

291
00:20:53.599 --> 00:20:59.680
and mine had like chorizo and pepperoni
and mushrooms and bacon and so like

292
00:20:59.720 --> 00:21:03.160
at all like soaked into the crust
made it a little bit more tolerable.

293
00:21:03.200 --> 00:21:06.160
But I had a bite of hers. I was like, that's why you

294
00:21:06.160 --> 00:21:11.279
thought it was gross, because it
is. But and you normally make really

295
00:21:11.319 --> 00:21:14.640
good pizza from what I've heard.
Yeah, it looked good. I mean

296
00:21:15.000 --> 00:21:18.880
it was what it was. I
mean, if I have to eat pizza

297
00:21:18.920 --> 00:21:22.400
like that, and I have to
eat pizza like that, the better than

298
00:21:22.400 --> 00:21:29.200
no pizza. You only make cauliflower
a cross pizza you can buy all the

299
00:21:29.240 --> 00:21:34.440
store isn't too bad. I'm just
just sticking my I've got a big old

300
00:21:34.440 --> 00:21:38.519
bag wheat flour. But those are
the things I have to do. Those

301
00:21:38.519 --> 00:21:41.200
are the changes I have to make
to get the results that I want.

302
00:21:42.640 --> 00:21:48.640
Same thing though, with drugs,
you're gonna sit here in black. I

303
00:21:48.640 --> 00:21:53.920
don't want to die from liver failure. Well you say that, but you're

304
00:21:53.960 --> 00:21:57.880
still drinking a fifth of day,
Like, yeah, your actions don't match

305
00:21:57.880 --> 00:22:00.799
your words. Yeah, And if
you're drinking it for the day, you're

306
00:22:00.799 --> 00:22:04.480
going to get the shakes and you're
gonna your body is gonna physically become dependent.

307
00:22:06.000 --> 00:22:07.680
And then you know, it's scary
to just quit cold turkey. You

308
00:22:07.680 --> 00:22:11.759
know, you really should go to
a detox program, right, not necessarily

309
00:22:11.839 --> 00:22:15.279
a nice thing. You have to
go to an inpatient treatment program. That's

310
00:22:15.319 --> 00:22:19.279
definitely totally up to you. But
first five days after quitting are the most

311
00:22:19.319 --> 00:22:26.559
crucial days of your life. Like
you could die, yeah, even longer

312
00:22:26.599 --> 00:22:29.079
at than that. Actually it's up
to two weeks, I think it.

313
00:22:30.839 --> 00:22:36.440
But those those things are real.
And if you're not sure where to start,

314
00:22:36.720 --> 00:22:37.960
you don't want to be labeled.
I don't want to be labeled as

315
00:22:37.960 --> 00:22:44.240
it alcoholic. Well, here's a
fun fact for you. If you stop

316
00:22:44.319 --> 00:22:49.039
doing drugs, you can join the
recovery community and there you're not an alcoholic,

317
00:22:51.480 --> 00:22:55.079
You're not a junkie, you're recovery, your person in recovery. Look

318
00:22:55.119 --> 00:22:59.079
at that, right, that sounds
pretty damn good, a lot better than

319
00:22:59.319 --> 00:23:03.720
being all those shameful words, you
know, like the one person about earlier.

320
00:23:03.759 --> 00:23:07.440
It's like I've said to them,
don't you just want to be in

321
00:23:07.519 --> 00:23:10.880
recovery? But I don't even think
they know what that means. No,

322
00:23:11.599 --> 00:23:17.640
like what a lot of people like
tiptoe round recovery, but deep down inside

323
00:23:17.839 --> 00:23:22.440
they don't want it, but they
just want to make it look good to

324
00:23:22.519 --> 00:23:27.480
please people for a while. And
there's usually some kind of trauma that they're

325
00:23:27.480 --> 00:23:33.160
trying to cover up too. Yep. You know, when you do drugs,

326
00:23:33.160 --> 00:23:36.640
you actually will add to the trauma
because you will say things and do

327
00:23:36.720 --> 00:23:41.119
things that you regret, which you
will not care about if you start using

328
00:23:41.200 --> 00:23:45.440
again. So that's one way to
hide from that. And I think me

329
00:23:45.480 --> 00:23:51.799
and Mitch spoke about that on our
podcast last week. When was it the

330
00:23:51.799 --> 00:23:56.720
week before we talked about trauma white
knuckling it dot com. Yep, thanks,

331
00:23:56.920 --> 00:24:00.960
I do you want to check that
out after this one? Yeah,

332
00:24:00.359 --> 00:24:07.480
it's something there, man, And
until you can get a grasp on that

333
00:24:07.839 --> 00:24:08.920
to deal with it. And you
don't have to just deal with it all

334
00:24:10.000 --> 00:24:11.440
at once either, you know,
you can just be aware of it.

335
00:24:11.680 --> 00:24:18.119
Yeah. I recommend breaking it up
into sections and talking about it with a

336
00:24:18.200 --> 00:24:22.799
therapist. Everybody in recovery programming will
tell you go get a sponsor, Go

337
00:24:22.880 --> 00:24:27.920
get a sponsor. Those sponsors are
not equipped to handle someone's trauma that work

338
00:24:27.960 --> 00:24:33.000
in the steps is going to bring
up. No, And I always tell

339
00:24:33.000 --> 00:24:36.400
everybody that you plan on working the
steps, you better have a therapist.

340
00:24:37.119 --> 00:24:40.400
And when you're going through your stuff
work, talk to your therapists about it

341
00:24:40.480 --> 00:24:44.680
and be open about it with them, because they're going to help you guide

342
00:24:44.680 --> 00:24:48.000
your way through that process. Where
a sponsor, yeah, they have lived

343
00:24:48.079 --> 00:24:57.960
experience, but they don't know how
to professionally help you at all. Yeah,

344
00:24:59.640 --> 00:25:02.240
let's say our therapist. Then they're
going to tell you that they can't

345
00:25:02.279 --> 00:25:06.839
be your sponsor or your therapist.
So that's not gonna work. And just

346
00:25:06.880 --> 00:25:10.000
because your friend, my friend went
and she's this, and she does that,

347
00:25:10.119 --> 00:25:14.039
and she says, I'm I'm not
an alcoholic and I don't have a

348
00:25:14.079 --> 00:25:19.240
problem, like I've lied to my
therapist too, lots of them. Ye,

349
00:25:19.880 --> 00:25:23.240
well, why are you sleeping it? I don't know. I was

350
00:25:23.279 --> 00:25:27.799
a ton I was doing whatever drug
I was doing at the time, and

351
00:25:29.240 --> 00:25:30.559
or how much I was doing you
know, no wonder why I couldn't go

352
00:25:30.640 --> 00:25:36.920
to sleep. Yeah, well,
we'll leave those parts out and we'll just

353
00:25:36.960 --> 00:25:41.680
talk about the crazy and we'll edit
the version that we want them to hear,

354
00:25:41.759 --> 00:25:44.119
and then they tell us what we
want them to say. So here

355
00:25:44.160 --> 00:25:47.599
you go. It's a win win. I can go ahead and thanks for

356
00:25:47.680 --> 00:25:52.960
signing my bullshit. Thank you think
Yeah, but oh you're just saying,

357
00:25:52.960 --> 00:25:56.559
oh my crazy pills, all right, one stuff closer, getting that monthly

358
00:25:56.680 --> 00:26:00.720
check. Yeah, it's it's a
road man, but it can be done.

359
00:26:00.960 --> 00:26:03.559
You're doing it. I'm doing it, Marty's doing it, Mitch is

360
00:26:03.599 --> 00:26:07.640
doing it, Kim's doing it.
We know a lot of people doing it.

361
00:26:07.559 --> 00:26:15.200
And how much better life is,
how easier life is is what blows

362
00:26:15.200 --> 00:26:18.160
me away. And I was talking
to somebody, I think at the volleyball

363
00:26:18.160 --> 00:26:19.799
tournament. I'm like, why,
why we fought it so hard. I

364
00:26:19.839 --> 00:26:22.839
have no idea. You know,
there's one guy out there right now that

365
00:26:23.480 --> 00:26:29.680
has fought it for so long,
and I've talked to him multiple times.

366
00:26:29.680 --> 00:26:33.119
You've talked to this guy multiple times, and he's finally taking recovery coach training.

367
00:26:33.839 --> 00:26:38.039
Yeah, you know, putting forth
the effort to change his life.

368
00:26:38.799 --> 00:26:47.519
And I actually called him this morning
congratulated on him for actually doing something good.

369
00:26:48.240 --> 00:26:52.079
I know, I messed up words, It's all right. You congratulated

370
00:26:52.160 --> 00:27:07.839
on him an a porno and yeah, so yeah you yeah, hangratulations for

371
00:27:07.000 --> 00:27:11.200
actually doing something that's gonna help him
in his recovery, not only him,

372
00:27:11.319 --> 00:27:18.559
but other people because he suffers from
a lot of different things. Mitch is

373
00:27:18.559 --> 00:27:23.519
here, obviously, obviously that was
the guy's favorite drop. Yeah. Yeah,

374
00:27:23.559 --> 00:27:27.720
so those are those are huge steps, you know, because to talk

375
00:27:27.759 --> 00:27:30.599
about it and to say, oh, I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna

376
00:27:30.599 --> 00:27:32.759
just but then realize, you know
what, I have to work in this.

377
00:27:33.039 --> 00:27:33.839
Yeh. I have to make this
my life. I have to be

378
00:27:34.000 --> 00:27:38.920
in recovery and there's nothing wrong with
that. There's another guy that I know

379
00:27:40.720 --> 00:27:45.400
who moved away, far away,
and then I didn't hear frohim for a

380
00:27:45.440 --> 00:27:51.920
while, and so I'm checking jails
and obituaries and like, what's going on.

381
00:27:52.240 --> 00:27:57.319
Then to get a call this person
said, well, I went to

382
00:27:57.359 --> 00:28:04.160
a treatment program and and now I'm
going into this sober living housing and I

383
00:28:04.200 --> 00:28:08.279
get to stay there for a year
free. It's nice, Winfield, it's

384
00:28:08.359 --> 00:28:12.559
nice, I said, cool.
He said, all I have to do

385
00:28:12.720 --> 00:28:22.160
is go to X amount of meetings
every week and don't do drugs, don't

386
00:28:22.200 --> 00:28:29.440
drink, don't do nothing. Seems
easy. Then I was asked for a

387
00:28:29.640 --> 00:28:33.519
shirt, so I sent this person
a shirt, two of them. Yeah,

388
00:28:33.680 --> 00:28:37.519
well I'll say you sent them too, not just one, two two

389
00:28:37.559 --> 00:28:42.039
shirts, And I didn't hear from
them. I had some questions I was

390
00:28:42.079 --> 00:28:47.799
asking and didn't hear back. And
then and got a message back saying thanks

391
00:28:47.799 --> 00:28:52.480
for the sweatshirt. Got your sweatshirt. And I said, well, this

392
00:28:52.559 --> 00:28:56.960
isn't making sense because I ain't send
he was a sweatshirt. No sweatshirt would

393
00:28:56.960 --> 00:29:00.240
have never fit in that little package. So the stuffs. It makes perfect

394
00:29:00.279 --> 00:29:03.559
sense to me, really, but
it makes no sense. But it makes

395
00:29:03.599 --> 00:29:11.599
perfect sense. And person called me
today and said again, Winfield, thanks,

396
00:29:11.640 --> 00:29:15.200
I got your sweatshirt. And I
said I didn't send you sweatshirt,

397
00:29:15.759 --> 00:29:18.880
send you to T shirts. You
didn't even open the package, did you?

398
00:29:18.000 --> 00:29:23.240
He said, no, I send
your gate kicked out of the sober

399
00:29:23.319 --> 00:29:29.640
living place. He said yeah.
I said you were in there drinking and

400
00:29:29.640 --> 00:29:34.559
stuff. And he said yeah.
I said, are you okay? How

401
00:29:34.559 --> 00:29:37.599
are you doing? I got to
go. I get another call coming in.

402
00:29:38.880 --> 00:29:41.839
I said, come on, dude, no you don't. I got

403
00:29:41.880 --> 00:29:45.640
another call. I'll call you right
back to hear from him because you started

404
00:29:45.680 --> 00:29:51.799
asking him real heavy questions, because
I really want him to this person to

405
00:29:51.839 --> 00:29:56.440
see a therapist. Man, and
there's a lot of trauma that this person

406
00:29:56.599 --> 00:30:04.480
wants to bury deep down that he's
got to deal with. Yeah, and

407
00:30:04.519 --> 00:30:07.960
until you fix that, and you
don't again, you don't have to deal

408
00:30:07.000 --> 00:30:11.039
with it all at once. Mitchell
knows we're doing a podcast where he keeps

409
00:30:11.039 --> 00:30:15.960
coming in and out. Obviously,
sorry, that'll to keep going off.

410
00:30:15.000 --> 00:30:19.640
But you don't have to deal with
it all at once. Like the whole

411
00:30:19.640 --> 00:30:23.599
stuff I had, I just put
it on a shelf in my mind somewhere.

412
00:30:23.640 --> 00:30:26.640
I just put it on a shelf
in a closet, and it's like,

413
00:30:26.640 --> 00:30:30.440
I'm gonna get to you, but
I knew that I had to be

414
00:30:30.480 --> 00:30:33.200
on stable ground, and A I
knew I had to get a year.

415
00:30:33.519 --> 00:30:36.400
It's like, I want to get
at least a year before I even start

416
00:30:36.640 --> 00:30:41.000
touching that because I want to be
solid, you know, I don't want

417
00:30:41.039 --> 00:30:45.359
something to trip me out or start
really thinking about it or you know,

418
00:30:45.400 --> 00:30:48.000
if I was four months in and
tried doing it, I don't know if

419
00:30:48.039 --> 00:30:52.200
I would have had resentments or if
I would have felt stupid for maybe a

420
00:30:52.240 --> 00:30:57.359
text message that I had sent.
I don't know, it was a whole

421
00:30:57.480 --> 00:31:02.920
ordeal. But when I could actually
put together, I actually have two years

422
00:31:02.960 --> 00:31:07.880
clean, and I was okay with
what I had said in that text message.

423
00:31:07.920 --> 00:31:11.920
Then I was like, look,
would I have sent that same message.

424
00:31:11.960 --> 00:31:15.880
No, it had been worded a
lot differently, but probably the same

425
00:31:15.920 --> 00:31:21.839
meaning behind it. Yeah, And
I'm not And I didn't apologize for sending

426
00:31:21.839 --> 00:31:25.440
it. It was sent. I
can't do nothing about it, right,

427
00:31:25.839 --> 00:31:30.359
you know, and it is what
it is. If it hurts your feeling,

428
00:31:30.440 --> 00:31:37.559
sorry, but I don't regret sending
it because there's nothing I can do

429
00:31:37.599 --> 00:31:40.920
about it. You know, if
you sit here and cry about stuff that

430
00:31:41.000 --> 00:31:44.400
you can't ever change, then you're
going to keep it your stuff in that

431
00:31:44.400 --> 00:31:45.319
cycle. But if you can step
up and man up and be like,

432
00:31:45.400 --> 00:31:48.799
yep, I sent it and what
I had just done that was the same

433
00:31:48.799 --> 00:31:52.799
one. Today. No, I
would word it a lot differently, but

434
00:31:52.920 --> 00:31:56.759
at that time I was a person
who was using drinking feelings at that moment.

435
00:31:56.839 --> 00:32:04.400
Yeah, And that's the biggest part
about being in recovery is actually expressing

436
00:32:04.759 --> 00:32:08.440
our feelings again two people and how
you actually feel. And it's okay to

437
00:32:08.440 --> 00:32:12.559
set boundaries with certain people. A
lot of people you're going to have to

438
00:32:12.599 --> 00:32:16.559
set boundaries with. You can't be
that yes man anymore. It's okay to

439
00:32:16.599 --> 00:32:23.640
say no, yeah, and to
own up to things that you've done that

440
00:32:23.680 --> 00:32:27.720
you've caused. You know. And
somebody said something to me once and it

441
00:32:27.799 --> 00:32:30.720
was it might have been Stephen butt
Well, he said a lot of good

442
00:32:30.720 --> 00:32:36.240
things to me, but it was
what role did you have in it?

443
00:32:37.119 --> 00:32:39.000
What role did you play in that? And maybe it wasn't him, I

444
00:32:39.000 --> 00:32:44.039
don't know, but it got me
thinking about a lot of different things and

445
00:32:44.039 --> 00:32:49.519
a lot of different situations, and
even around here at work, when you

446
00:32:49.559 --> 00:32:53.519
screw up, I'm like, uh, what role did I have in that?

447
00:32:54.119 --> 00:32:59.960
Well? I didn't equip him with
the right knowledge or the right tools,

448
00:33:00.200 --> 00:33:06.720
or the right expectations or where whatever
you know, and not every time

449
00:33:06.759 --> 00:33:08.119
you screw up as my fault.
But I'm just saying, like, what

450
00:33:08.160 --> 00:33:14.200
could I have done that? I
direct you well enough, right, And

451
00:33:14.240 --> 00:33:17.160
I take a lot of my own
accountability for things though. Too. It's

452
00:33:17.160 --> 00:33:22.200
not like I try to make excuses
for anybody else where what I had going

453
00:33:22.240 --> 00:33:25.480
on. You know, I take
accountability for what I did. If I

454
00:33:25.519 --> 00:33:30.839
did it, I did it.
I can't hide behind shame and guilt,

455
00:33:30.200 --> 00:33:35.519
you know, for otherwise I'm going
to end up going back down the road.

456
00:33:35.599 --> 00:33:37.960
I don't want to go down because
I'm not owning up to my own

457
00:33:38.000 --> 00:33:45.960
mistakes. Right. Some people they
like to do that, and I used

458
00:33:45.960 --> 00:33:49.000
to do it too. It would
hide behind the bottle and then you just

459
00:33:49.039 --> 00:33:52.119
don't feel and who cares, I
don't care, blah blah blah, and

460
00:33:52.119 --> 00:33:55.599
you'll back your own bs. Nope, I wasn't my fault anyway. Screw

461
00:33:55.720 --> 00:34:00.519
them, f one Field. I
don't need him anymore. Subway. If

462
00:34:00.559 --> 00:34:05.960
I work there, I can make
sandwiches and eat them too. Her McDonald's

463
00:34:05.960 --> 00:34:12.159
pay justice good and they give you
a free meal every day. Yeah,

464
00:34:12.239 --> 00:34:17.679
and I could take days off when
I want, call in sick all the

465
00:34:17.679 --> 00:34:23.079
time and get free fries. I
wonder if they have a rule there if

466
00:34:23.079 --> 00:34:28.480
they hit hit the floor and you
eat them. I wouldn't want to eat

467
00:34:28.559 --> 00:34:30.119
nothing off a restaurant floor. Now, if you clean the floor, you

468
00:34:30.239 --> 00:34:34.599
clean just like a little section.
You start dropping like chicken sandwiches and ship

469
00:34:34.760 --> 00:34:44.239
just trabbi oops, trash instantly.
What if it's like okay, what if

470
00:34:44.239 --> 00:34:50.159
it's a rabbi or like a New
York strip or something and it's raw so

471
00:34:50.239 --> 00:34:52.760
you just seasoned it. You're about
throwing on the grilled oops. And you

472
00:34:52.880 --> 00:34:58.280
got Justine Fingers, your daughter,
and she drops it around the floor.

473
00:34:58.719 --> 00:35:04.199
Are you are you asking like from
the Waiting movie? No? Oh no,

474
00:35:04.320 --> 00:35:07.199
I'm just wondering, because if you
drop that, do they just go

475
00:35:07.559 --> 00:35:12.119
just throw it on the grill.
You're gonna cook the dirt off? What

476
00:35:12.199 --> 00:35:17.559
at one point in the deep frar? Oh that's what, Justin, did

477
00:35:17.599 --> 00:35:21.480
you work on a restaurant. I've
worked in lots of restaurants. I've I

478
00:35:21.559 --> 00:35:24.000
haven't seen people do that. Drop
something on the floor and like, oh,

479
00:35:24.039 --> 00:35:28.199
we'll just throw in the deep fry
for a minute. Mistake. All

480
00:35:28.239 --> 00:35:30.519
that hot grease will cook whatever's off
of it real fast, and they'll throw

481
00:35:30.519 --> 00:35:34.000
it on the tar boiler. No
one will ever know. It's like some

482
00:35:34.000 --> 00:35:36.880
fries or because I don't see you're
throwing a steak in the deep frier.

483
00:35:37.400 --> 00:35:42.599
You're shaking your head. Yes,
bacon, bacon cooks real fast and deep.

484
00:35:42.840 --> 00:35:46.880
Yeah, that's not steak. Got
cook got cook off whatever bactery was

485
00:35:46.920 --> 00:35:52.199
on the floor. You don't throw
it on the tar boiler. The friers

486
00:35:52.239 --> 00:35:54.239
all liquids. The dirt will fall
to the bottom of the deep fryer too.

487
00:35:54.440 --> 00:35:59.800
Theory, Yeah, hmmm, I
don't know. I think around this

488
00:36:00.119 --> 00:36:02.679
here, though I've seen people do
it. What if we started a restaurant

489
00:36:02.679 --> 00:36:06.440
that's all we did was drop food
on the floor and then deep fry it.

490
00:36:07.760 --> 00:36:10.159
That would be so horrible. You
wouldn't come to my restaurant. No,

491
00:36:12.360 --> 00:36:22.480
not at all. Call it second
chances. I wonder what Mitch would

492
00:36:22.519 --> 00:36:28.679
eat because there would be some people
like mmmm. I don't know. Have

493
00:36:28.679 --> 00:36:30.639
to try this out, but I
think it's a good idea if we if

494
00:36:30.679 --> 00:36:34.440
we just expand our horizon a little. Yeah, yeah, years ago,

495
00:36:34.440 --> 00:36:37.440
I want to start a coffee company. I remember that I still do.

496
00:36:37.519 --> 00:36:40.199
I don't think it would be that
hard. Well, it kind of would

497
00:36:40.199 --> 00:36:44.159
be because we'd have to like roast
all the beans because the beans are not

498
00:36:44.239 --> 00:36:49.159
cheap and you can't just grow some
coffee no plants, like to get them

499
00:36:49.159 --> 00:36:52.559
from a different country or something.
I heard the best coffee bean comes out

500
00:36:52.559 --> 00:36:59.159
of poop. Ah, I don't
know about that. Yeah, watch too

501
00:36:59.159 --> 00:37:01.639
many movies, do No, Seriously, there's a coffee bean that comes out

502
00:37:01.639 --> 00:37:08.079
of poop and they it doesn't come
out of poop like something. They poop

503
00:37:08.119 --> 00:37:13.800
it back out and it's supposedly the
best coffee ever. And I will never

504
00:37:13.880 --> 00:37:17.039
try it because someone digested that bean
and then they pooped it out. Then

505
00:37:17.079 --> 00:37:21.360
it gets roasted, ground up,
and then you drink it. We can

506
00:37:21.400 --> 00:37:27.079
call that second Chances. They just
have Mitch and they're eating coffee beans and

507
00:37:27.119 --> 00:37:30.400
them up after. I don't remember
what coffee it was, but yeah,

508
00:37:30.519 --> 00:37:37.880
and then we'll do a double roast
where he eats it again. Second Chance

509
00:37:37.960 --> 00:37:46.199
coffee double roasted, which would really
be like four times through. Be interesting.

510
00:37:46.760 --> 00:37:51.920
Now that is a good cup of
coffee, right that he's delicious?

511
00:37:52.760 --> 00:37:57.800
Well, I don't know. We'll
get back into that that's some other time.

512
00:37:57.840 --> 00:38:01.800
But I'm just wondering, because sometimes
I wonder different things. Clearly,

513
00:38:04.280 --> 00:38:08.199
you did actually go to a local
coffee place around here and tried a bunch

514
00:38:08.199 --> 00:38:14.559
of different coffees and creating your own
blend in an't you. Well, we

515
00:38:14.639 --> 00:38:22.280
realize that I'd have to buy a
roaster, which I don't. I want

516
00:38:22.280 --> 00:38:25.719
to stay like five hundred bucks okay, so very doable at that time in

517
00:38:25.760 --> 00:38:30.960
my life. Very not doable.
So it was like, hey, we

518
00:38:30.000 --> 00:38:35.719
can buy coffee from said company,
kind of like what Meyer does, right,

519
00:38:35.960 --> 00:38:37.719
you know, they'll go to Tyson
and be like, hey, once

520
00:38:37.760 --> 00:38:42.639
you give us, we'll buy that
chicken from you, and then here's some

521
00:38:42.719 --> 00:38:45.760
bags put in those bags for us
to pay for that too. Like they

522
00:38:45.840 --> 00:38:49.280
pretty much package they do all the
stuff for him, and it just says,

523
00:38:49.280 --> 00:38:52.360
Myron it but it's the same damn
thing. Yep. You know,

524
00:38:52.480 --> 00:38:54.519
Cereal is a little bit different,
but it kind of the same. Yep.

525
00:38:55.519 --> 00:39:00.400
But it was like, yeah,
we could do that, but then

526
00:39:00.440 --> 00:39:04.639
we'd ended up like not making anything. And we were hoping at first,

527
00:39:04.679 --> 00:39:07.159
like a coffee company would come out
to us and go, hey, can

528
00:39:07.199 --> 00:39:10.719
we use your logo to put it
on a bag of ours, and let's

529
00:39:10.760 --> 00:39:15.440
come up with a coffee, and
then every bag that's sold will donate X

530
00:39:15.480 --> 00:39:17.719
amount of dollars to you guys.
And that would have been the way I

531
00:39:17.880 --> 00:39:21.039
wanted to do it at first,
but then I just started thinking, well,

532
00:39:21.039 --> 00:39:23.400
hell, we might as well just
roast our own beans, put them

533
00:39:23.400 --> 00:39:30.519
in bags, and we sell them. Yeah, but this office is not

534
00:39:30.599 --> 00:39:35.360
big enough. No, and we'd
have to have people there when because like

535
00:39:35.400 --> 00:39:40.440
an order would come in and we'd
be like, ah, I'm gonna go

536
00:39:40.519 --> 00:39:45.480
roast some coffee. Hold on,
don't row some too long? No,

537
00:39:49.760 --> 00:39:53.280
sorry, very fine. Yeah,
it was I don't know. It's something

538
00:39:53.280 --> 00:39:59.519
that we could get into at some
point. But why not now? Huh

539
00:39:59.599 --> 00:40:04.280
yeah? Why not? You we
just did our own for the office coffee?

540
00:40:04.320 --> 00:40:06.960
Is this is some good coffee?
Yeah? And then I have to

541
00:40:07.039 --> 00:40:08.920
learn how to roast it. Yeah. Should I go to like a different

542
00:40:09.039 --> 00:40:15.719
country and become a roast master?
Good question? You do like being in

543
00:40:15.800 --> 00:40:19.840
college? They don't offer college classes
in that I like being in college because

544
00:40:19.840 --> 00:40:22.239
they pay me, right, That's
what I mean. You have found a

545
00:40:22.280 --> 00:40:28.719
scam that's unbeatable as long as you
keep going. But eventually they stop paying

546
00:40:28.760 --> 00:40:31.000
you like, or they want some
of it back. I'm not sure how

547
00:40:31.039 --> 00:40:36.360
that works. Yeah, I'm not
sure either. Yeah, we'll have to

548
00:40:36.400 --> 00:40:39.599
figure all that out. But that's
the beauty about being sober, being in

549
00:40:39.639 --> 00:40:45.119
recovery is if I really wanted to
start a coffee company, I could.

550
00:40:46.519 --> 00:40:51.239
You really can do anything that you
want in life if you really want to

551
00:40:51.440 --> 00:40:53.480
do it. Yeah, I mean, it's the age of the internet.

552
00:40:53.519 --> 00:40:57.239
You can look up stuff. How
do I do this? There you go?

553
00:40:59.039 --> 00:41:04.639
So I'm using you're not gonna ever
get that chance. Now, you're

554
00:41:04.639 --> 00:41:07.880
ever gonna go anywhere using No.
They're like, well, I've been drinking

555
00:41:07.920 --> 00:41:10.400
for years. I just drink beer. Somebody tell me that too. I

556
00:41:10.519 --> 00:41:17.039
just drink beer. Well, the
end result equals drunk, and that's what

557
00:41:17.079 --> 00:41:22.480
screws you up. That's what nobody
likes. That's the problem. It's not

558
00:41:22.599 --> 00:41:27.719
beer liquor. Liquor. If you
drink that like I did, it destroys

559
00:41:27.719 --> 00:41:31.599
your organs quicker. But beer will
do the same because you drink more and

560
00:41:31.639 --> 00:41:34.559
more and more and more. And
it's like the guy that's like, I

561
00:41:34.639 --> 00:41:37.559
drink a six pack at night my
first word out of the first words out

562
00:41:37.559 --> 00:41:45.119
of my mouth, or the first
word is liar And what else? No,

563
00:41:45.159 --> 00:41:50.079
I just drink a six pack every
night, because after about two weeks

564
00:41:50.480 --> 00:41:54.679
you're gonna need about eight beers.
In about two three months, you're gonna

565
00:41:54.679 --> 00:42:00.800
need nine to ten. You're gonna
switch to a higher alcohol beer. Did

566
00:42:00.840 --> 00:42:02.360
you realize it's getting expensive? And
you still want to tell people I drink

567
00:42:02.360 --> 00:42:07.280
six's bag But then it gets to
a twelve pack and then you start buying

568
00:42:07.320 --> 00:42:13.760
cases and you drink about ten to
twelve thirteen fourteen a night, high alcohol

569
00:42:13.840 --> 00:42:16.239
stuff, and then you pass out
every night, you know, and the

570
00:42:16.320 --> 00:42:24.639
end result is drunk. So it's
it's not a thing of what type of

571
00:42:24.639 --> 00:42:30.800
alcohol you're drinking. No, but
it can be tough, you know,

572
00:42:30.920 --> 00:42:37.760
to actually pull it all in and
have the awareness to realize that list that

573
00:42:37.800 --> 00:42:40.400
you're making of great things that happened
to me when I'm drinking versus the bad

574
00:42:40.440 --> 00:42:45.000
things that happen to me when I'm
drinking. Let's get pretty one sided.

575
00:42:45.840 --> 00:42:50.440
And even writing that list out,
looking at it, it's still hard to

576
00:42:50.480 --> 00:42:54.239
go, Yeah, probably shouldn't do
that, because that's how addiction works.

577
00:42:54.280 --> 00:43:00.280
It takes that logic out and you'll
make more excuses. This is stupid anyway.

578
00:43:00.360 --> 00:43:07.000
And yeah, but the first step
though, is to admit that you

579
00:43:07.000 --> 00:43:09.039
have a problem. If the person
can't admit they have a problem, even

580
00:43:09.079 --> 00:43:13.760
though they know they have a problem, they're not ready, no, because

581
00:43:13.800 --> 00:43:15.480
it's about them, you know,
it really is. It's on them.

582
00:43:15.719 --> 00:43:21.440
They're the ones that have to make
the choice to change, and change is

583
00:43:21.480 --> 00:43:23.960
hard. People don't like change sometimes, but you're changing for the better.

584
00:43:27.079 --> 00:43:30.559
I don't know how many people I'm
sure has happened, but they just quit

585
00:43:31.159 --> 00:43:37.519
using drugs and their life just got
shittier. I've never heard that even either,

586
00:43:37.559 --> 00:43:39.760
but I'm sure I maybe it's like
I hit by a bus or something.

587
00:43:39.800 --> 00:43:44.920
I don't know, like it could
have happened. I don't know,

588
00:43:45.960 --> 00:43:49.199
Like I gotta lie. The first
year of recovery is a little bumpy,

589
00:43:50.320 --> 00:43:54.840
but that's just because you're going through
all these emotions, you're going through trauma

590
00:43:54.880 --> 00:43:59.599
that you're working with with a therapist. You know, there's a lot of

591
00:43:59.599 --> 00:44:04.960
things putting together that first year that
it's gonna seem rough. It's gonna seem

592
00:44:05.000 --> 00:44:09.159
a little bumpy, but give it
eighteen months and two years, you're gonna

593
00:44:09.159 --> 00:44:19.360
be thankful that you did it.
Yeah, well, I was gonna get

594
00:44:19.360 --> 00:44:22.559
to another stat that I saw,
but I'm I'm not. I'm gonna actually

595
00:44:22.559 --> 00:44:31.519
look it up before I start spewing
misinformation. But that's all I got for

596
00:44:31.559 --> 00:44:36.559
today though. Yeah, so we'll
wrap it up and that'll that'll do it

597
00:44:36.599 --> 00:44:45.159
for today's podcast. Check out the
latest recovery Stories story that I posted.

598
00:44:45.639 --> 00:44:52.440
If so, all the stories are
posted Roberta's, Matt's, Corey's, and

599
00:44:53.039 --> 00:44:57.880
Melissa's. They're at two seventeen recovery
dot com. You can check them out

600
00:44:57.880 --> 00:45:00.719
there. You can check them out
on our YouTube. We have some other

601
00:45:00.719 --> 00:45:05.599
fun videos there as well, but
check out the pictures too from the Volleyball

602
00:45:06.920 --> 00:45:09.760
and two seventeen recovery dot com slash
picks. But so next time I have

603
00:45:09.800 --> 00:45:14.199
a great one. To hang in
there and we'll chat with you later later.

604
00:45:14.400 --> 00:45:17.760
Thanks for listening to the two seventeen
Recovery podcast. Listen to over nine

605
00:45:17.840 --> 00:45:22.360
hundred episodes on the two seventeen Recovery
app that's free in your app store or

606
00:45:22.400 --> 00:45:30.000
online at two seventeen recovery dot com