A decade of destruction and here we are ten years. That's a long time.
Boys. You've been doing this for a decade now, and we would
come to celebrate a decade of fucking holes and taking souls like like only a
LAPS fan can. And I'm just here to share my little testimonial and my
experience in piece of the Pie. I'd like to say I've been here for
the whole ten years, but that that would not be accurate. I found
the LAPS fan at the at Carney's convention in Shamberg in twenty twenty eighteen.
I believe it was the last day. I was just kind of walking around
in the aftermath of everything, and I saw this name on the sheet,
said the Lapse Fan, and I was like that, that sounds like it's
something I might be interested in. So I uh, I think I had
even looked like you guys up maybe even a couple of months before that.
I was looking for some I was like, I'll start listening to some wrestling
podcasts, and uh, I saw the Lapse fan and I remember thinking,
Jesus fucking Christ, this shows like five six hours long. How the fuck
am I gonna think I gonna do? That idiot. So I believe that
that was around the time that uh Brucey was coming out and something to wrestle
with and uhh but I uh so I listened to that, and you know,
I enjoyed and a little hour and a half shows and all that,
and I thought it was pretty cool. So I get to uh Shamburg and
I walk in. You know, there's the big ten area in and Cody
and all his cigar bullshit's going on outside. What a fraud, But anyway,
he We're in there and then then the coach heirs come in do their
thing, and we got the lapse vents and this is all brand new to
me. And the moment and I think I've said it a couple of times
to anybody that cares to listen to me. The moment that got me it
was laps events talking about doctor Jerry Graham and I have done large amounts of
cocaine together, and I was like, oh fuck, what's this ship I
was in, Like, you know, that's it set the tone and let
me know like, Okay, this is some big boys shit here. We're
not fucking around with horseshit stories and and and lies. You know, we're
I mean, we're kind of sort of fucking around with life. But in
more ways there's more truth in those lies than the supposed truth that we're presented
with. And that's all the fucking matters at the end of the day,
is that output. Motherfuckers. So anyway, I was hooked. I I
completely was enamored, listened to uh believe it was was one of the I
thinkst battle the Superstars on the way home on the plane, lord Al laps
lord Ow. I fucking love lord Al and to hear somebody else like go
into a Lord owl. I I was smitten. I was smitten quite frankly.
But you know those six years ago, so I I gotta say,
if it wasn't you know for the Labs fan, uh, I'm I gonna
get corny and so it's like, oh, it wouldn't be here today,
but I wouldn't be doing you know, shit, didn't get good. It's
been a rough last few years and the need to get in my soapbox.
But I I don't think I would have been as good as I was without
the Lapse fan. It it gave me, he gave me shelter from the
stone Daddy. If nothing else, I had something to grab onto. I
had something I knew was going to be there. I found people I know
we're going to be there. It's it is outside of my family. It's
probably been the most transformative thing in my life. And I cannot pay that
back. I couldn't even I can't even put it into words. So I
wanted to do my best to try to not be the nature boy and and
go, God, I shot got But the feeling is real. That's that's
how I feel about this show, these guys. At the end of the
day, the what it creates, what it gives out to the universe is
the only the thing that makes our existence is worth anything on this planet.
And I'm fearful and I'm terrified that we're going in every other direction to avoid
those things. And the laps Fan is a beacon of light that shines and
leads the way and says, no, this is how we do it because
we're the fuckers that know, and we know how it used to be when
it was better. We know more than anybody how to make it better.
And the co chairs, I hope you have ten more decades. I don't
know if I'll be around for all of those. You know that would make
me one hundred and forty something. But with the advancements in modern medical science,
I'm sure we'll be hooking ourselves to ports very shortly and consuming our nutrients
and coming through them and it all be fantastic and it'll be fine, is
what I'm saying. So I'm looking forward to it. I can't wait.
Thank you, guys, Thank you, just I mean to everybody out there,
it's a collective. Unless you're one of the dipshits, then you can
go fuck yourself and get lost. But you know, you know if you
are, and if you're not, I'm not talking about you and you know
that too, So I love all of you. Thank you,