Others a dragon, time of magic, age to find the band of heirs,
the up to the fight, playing with powers, they don't understand,
wholl they fucking arm wholly save the lads, frecherslylighting in words, they are
the always dead, the babies wing the bing cars as a dragon, as
a giant step powers combine. A group of fantasy offers take on a sadistic
GamesMaster. Will they survive the odds to not look good? Others a dragon?
Others a dragon that was lovely? All right, let's make everything less
wholesome now now we're play off dragons. Hi yah, Welcome to dream Wankers
the One Shot I will be performing. I'm Steve weverl. This is the
first time I've ever DMed the game. Joining me as players today are Drew
Hayes. Hello Hello, I will be playing Gordon Skinflint, Joseph Brassy.
I will be playing by Bjornson, enthusiastic and violent Barbarian Robert Bevan. Hello
friends, I will be playing Klaus Richter, the Notorious rog and John G.
Hortness and returning returning Champion. Last on the charts, but first in
your Heart's fan Dingo The Fantastical okay. So, because this is my first
time dming a game, we begin our adventure in a tavern. We have
to go to the selar and fight routes. I'm leaving y oh shit,
Well there goes the first act. It's a tavern. It's a tavern of
well reputed tavern in a well reputed town. It is Lady Appleby's house of
meat. You were here to see a professor goose Waddle. He's a famous
in the wizarding scene. He's known to be a fair dealer with some odd
side quest and deep pockets. So as you enter the bar you see a
an academic looking gnome kind of looks stoned in this picture other but I don't
have many known pictures. This will have to do. He beckons you over.
Oh you're a oh, welcome to authors and dragons. Ye see,
we really do these live shows once. So y'all realize why you don't want
the fucking out. This is your Steve bringing a little bit of rodeo da
day. There we go, all right, technical difficulties in awkward silences.
This is what it's all about. Guys. This end of the table doesn't
really even know what's going on. So I deliberately made it so none of
us know what's going on, so it's more fun for everyone. Okay,
Professor Ghostwaddle again, looking slightly stoned and contemptuous, he reckons you over said,
Oh well, you guys must be the adventurers that answered my ad How
do you do? Good day, sir? I am lugubrious. Oh an
excellent word. Well done. Okay, we look, let's get past the
pointless introductions. It doesn't really matter who you are or who I am.
Well, it matters who I am. No, you are you the guy
with the money? That's good. No names means no background checks. Yes,
I am the man with the money, and that's excellent. That is
exactly the attitude I'm looking for. Today. We will be taking a rather
unusual journey. You may have heard of the astral planes and the planes of
the mind, but have you heard of the planes of inspiration? I'm a
fucking barred inspiration is what I do. Okay, so I'll take that as
a no. Definitely hasn't. That's fair. I don't not about the ass
planes. That's that's a different adventure. Friends. To put it in simple
terms, which I'm sure you people will appreciate. Well, I've learned how
to transverse dreams, and we will be taking a trip. You needn't worry
too much about the fundamentals. Have you ever seen the movie Inception? Oh
no, you wouldn't have if you don't have movies in this reality. It's
it's a shame of Leonardo Epio explains this far better than I can. He's
very charismatic. Man. Well, anyway, I will just need you to
do whatever it is you people do. Just deal with the unpleasantness and let
me do my thing. Our target is that man over there, and he
points to a man. He's kind of he's like tall, he's bold,
he looks like he may have pissed himself. He is sort of unconscious on
a table surrounded by empty tankards. I will leave people to draw their own
conclusions about it. Let's say that's our target there. We will be traversing
the subconscious of this man. Now, things may go wrong, so I
will need you to and what's the word be human shields? I mean that
is why we keep Jorg around. But all right, I got a question,
if if the target is right over there, can I just throw a
fireball on him and we can get paid. No, I want to do
the opposite of incinerating him. You want us to douse him in water.
I think he wants us to freeze him. He looks like he may have
already doused himself in a way I guess would have to fill him up with
water from the inside with a hose. Until he exploded, no, we
can do this, we can do this game. I better wake up.
I was thinking we will be filling him up from the inside in a sexual
way. Salty Bastards is until Sunday duty. I think this is the parts
normally starts taking his pants off. Okay, well before before we get that
where we're going, we don't need pants. Oh boy, I thought he
said, I need you to do what you people do. To Klaus,
he was, you know, ignorant of what he was saying. But the
more he talks, the more he was like, No, he did hire
this intention. So here's you have the right man, which is rare for
us. He brings out a device it's it's too fantastical to describe, so
I won't even try. That's fucking trademarked. And he goes, well,
first of all, we need to be in the right plane of reality and
he hits a button and the tavern changes around you. It's still roughly the
same shape, but where there are half elf some gnomes now they're just humans
and they're all kind of dressed funny. And uh but the man, yeah,
that the gnome was pointing out, is still there. His clothes are
different. He's still definitely pissed in him and he's still definitely unconscious at a
table. And uh yeah, some some what looked like serving wenches of another
world walk past you, and kind of these guys cause players, they have
fucking terrible cause players. Is that guy supposed to be a rogue? He
just it looks like a meth head. She recognized I was supposed to be
a rogue, and apparently she knows whatever a meth head is. Is she
from the seven Northwest? Again, I will leave this to the conclusions of
the audience. So the Professor's filling with a machine like woman. We're now
in the right plane of physical reality. It's time to enter the realm of
imagination. Now, before we enter the realm of imagination, that was imaginative,
well done, that was dramatic. There is a mechanic for this game
not many, but while you are in the realms of inspiration, you will
be able to on your turn role and imagination a dice which is a D
twenty, which means you can use your powers of imagination to conjure something that
may help you or may amusingly not help. So the professor explains, where
we're going is a mental plane. You will still be you, but the
rules are kind of written in the realm of this drunken man. Now,
I'd advise that we don't be too conspicuous and don't try to change things too
much, because the mind has an order, even this one, and it
will kind of you haven't seen inception, have you? No, it does
have its own self defense mechanisms. I don't know what they will be,
but that's what I'm paying you for. Is everybody ready to enter the realm
of imagination? Can I throw fireballs at the bald guy when we get to
the realm of imagination? Sure? Go nuts? All right? Cool?
I'm ready to enter. The bald guy's not ready to watch him? Yeah,
I'd like to get out of here before that happens. There's gunther anywhere
around because if I'm gonna because the last time I changed planes. It was
his damn fault. Well, you won't need him for this head trip,
okay. So he presses another button on the indescribably describable machine, and you
find yourself in an unfamiliar land. It's strange. It seems to be like
desolate concrete with all these metal chariots. You can't say any horses, and
they're all are kind of abandoned, and in the distances what seems to be
an eatery of some kind of a rather suspect looking chicken on it. I
don't actually know why this chicken looks like bulls, but I thought it was
ideal. Did you sort through? I got a bunch of chicken huts and
pick the worst one. Yes. Do you notice the closest to you one
of the metal chariots hide and the others has the word free candy painted on
it. Now, the Professor's kind of feeling with his machine is I need
to get to the correct level of the subconscious, but this has to be
sort of a slow process while I find out what the entry point is.
So, now that we are in the game, would everybody like to roll
initiative? Please? What we got eleven? All? Right? Class rules
are twenty two nice fending her rules at eleven good and skin flint rules a
gentleman's six. Okay, all right, Klaus, you have the initiative.
What would you like to do? All right? Last time, Klaus a
van like that he got molested. Klous would like to enter the van.
God damn it. All right, now we've hit the authors and Dragons trifect
us. We've had technical difficulties. We were late to start, and Bob
made chose for goddamn it. Okay, well that was a lot easier than
I thought it was going to be. Klaus. He wandered over to hit
the obvious trap. Open the door. You just about finding traps is my
job. He's not wrong. You just about open the door. You see
a box that says definitely free candy, not scorpions. But just as you
do, a tentacle reaches out, the van pulls you inside. You will
be tech. You are grappled. You can roll to escape that on your
next turn. In the meantime, you're taking one D four acid damage as
you are digested by what is clearly a mimic. So I'm not I'm not
into it. Whoever, No, you're into it. It's kind of choking
you. I don't know if that's I got. I gotta turn to figure
this out. So straight into the action, guys, and I guess next
is Joe Giver will walk over to the van and say God, Matt and
then try to pull class out. Okay, well, the bold choice to
to wrestle the mimic everything okay, horrifying, pretty I'm pretty sure I dated
her in high school. Or she might move something I saw because the mimic
is already sprung its trap that will go lasting initiative, So you can you
can offer me a strength check or pulling off blouse. Well that is he
that's you kind of sort of pulling him out of the door, but he's
still still got very firm grip on. Does he get any penalties if I
resist? This? Is? This is beautif we're talking about I've got to
give him the benefit of the day, even with a lower yet liking this.
It's not healthy for you. Whatever you're doing with your hands isn't isn't
helping you stick to the movie even more. The mimic's got that covered.
So loving I've got something, I'll help me stick to it. Now we
hit the A and D tri factor. How could you be? I put
time and effort into making the most awful thing and here you are just surpassing
me everything. Okay, so no, Klaus is still very much being good
on by this this thing. John, you'll turn alrighty, you know,
I why am I even looking at ship? I have one thing? Hey?
Byrd yes, duck, don't think I can? Well, I know,
fireball, that's a dexterity spell save DC fifteen seventeen? Do I roll
the same? Yeah? You really should? Uh fourteen? Okay? Well,
the good news is the mimic is not very agile. Barely knows how
many lada vam with that DC fifteen did you say? Yes? Okay?
DC fifteen, So bad news for you. Klaus. The big takes a
hit? How much damage is that? Thirty three three takes quite a big
hit. It shrieks, it is burned and in pain enough to let go
of Klaus Bjork. You kind of schlop back with a wet Klaus and sixteen
points of damage and you're both slightly on fire. So well done. Well
there is now I don't know if you want to roll around in it,
but dam offending goes in the middle of something. Okay, Gordon's and esophagus,
Gordon Skinflint, you'll turn all right. Well, now that Fandingo has
softened it up, Gordon skin Flint has been inspired since we stopped at that
first dimensional shift. So he's going to roll an imagination die to raise his
hand and scream, come forth, I summon you, my applebees. I
wish I could just give you that one, but you gotta roll a D
twenty minute. Oh my neat one. Okay. According to the chop,
your penis grows to the size of a pick. It has a face on
it that talks to you. All movement related saves and Mehley attacks are taking
it disadvantage. You get to choose what kind of face the penis hands?
Uh exuberant. This means he's going to go apport someone. How long before
I can cast fireball again? Wow? Does it just rip its way out
of his pants? Yeah? I'm sure, buddy. You said it could
talk right, Oh my gosh, okay, stations that that's definitely how it
talks. Excellent, wonderful. There are genuinely some really cool things on this,
but no, that wasn't all be different. You don't have to beg
a little buddy. You can just ask nice. Oh you think a little
about that, buddy. We should have put a little hat on it or
something. What do you think he's gonna imagine? Next round? Okay,
it's a mimics turn. It gets two tentacle attacks. It will roll for
at Bjorg and Klaus, then close does a twenty hit. Yeah, it
does a fourteen hit for you. All right, well again this bu Klaus
is safe. You are not. But you do get to roll a saving
throw. I believe to not be grappled, so that's a seven. You
are grappled, sir, and you will take eight damage. I don't want
this kind of hug. I feel like I've been rejected and it's offending,
goes Fault. Well, the mimic is it looks really damaged. It's it's
not really Van shaped anymore. It's kind of just a mess. Parts of
it singed, it's still screaming. It's very annoyed. And with that,
who turns it now? Clouds. I thought we had something Vane. I
don't know. Man turned me down, his his sucking on Borg. Now
the only thing they can get me out of this is my imagination. I'm
gonna roll and die nineteen nineteen. Oh excellent. Okay, you didn't know
what a rocket launcher was, but now you do. Not only do you
have a massive rocket launcher, but you have you just have the intuition to
know exactly how you can function up with it. So every round you can
use your attack to launch four fireball cells, spells, a single or multiple
tug. I used to know you. Everyone, Just remember, don't kill
the healer. You took my mimic away, but you can now have Gordon's
pink penis. Okay, so we'll have to see exactly how you fucked up
on the next round. Joe, your turn. I'm gonna roll imagination,
dice to get out of this. That's a thirteen. Think yeah, thirteen.
You're suddenly wearing cargo shorts and a critical Failure's T shirt. You've never
felt so comfortable. You add add one to your ace and ten your movement.
You will be spared. I look at the mimic and I go,
you don't want to grab something that's front brewery, right, okay, and
you would take one point of acid damage with that ten Joe, Sorry,
John, you'll tell I'm actually just gonna throw a firebolt at the thing.
Not a fireball this time, You're just a firebolt. I mean I'm durable.
That's eight ten, So I guess I miss you do miss? Yeah?
Well then I'm just gonna glare at the I'm gonna glare at the former
van disapprovingly. It has a bike seven eyes. You don't know where to
glare. You might might be glaring back at you. Some of them are
making kind of google eyes at Klaus. But you've had your chance, van
golden skin flint and your massive friendly paintis what have you convert? What do
you think? Buddy? Team work? All right, I don't like this?
Does that? I'm an extra attack around uh well, as a as
a part monk, I already get an extra unarmed attack per rounds. Oh
and if you spend a key point, you can use flurry of blows.
So yeah, I'm gonna do a unarmed strike U and then use the extra
one. And I'll go ahead and burn a key point to do flury of
blows to add two more. So it's a strip of dick. I'm just
gonna do this thing that's seriously flogging the molly. First hit is twenty two
definitely hits. Yeah. Second one is natural twenty hits sick of doom.
The third one is eighteen eighteen hits a right roll damage seven and six.
Holy crap. That as good as I was going to do on that.
This thing has had the worst death in possibly. Gordon just kind of immediately
embraces his new friends. It's like caber tossing. I guess the Scott's wish.
Yeah, he just rains down on this thing with an ultimate meat combo,
and he is dead. It has exploded into a pile of goo and
horrified eyes. And as it dies you hear very distantly something that sounds like
oh my and h Professor goose Waddle looks up in it. Oh, I
think we've been discovered. We should probably move along, Yes, move along
rather quickly into this chicken hut building. Please do you follow him in?
Or yes? Yeah, I want to get as far away from that pile
of stuff. I'm trying to just trying to in first well, roll a
perception guys, fourteen nineteen. Okay, it's not a high one. You
can sort of see something on the horizon. It looks like kind of a
wall of flabby red and you hear, oh my, oh my, getting
louder and louder, Professor goosewallders. Ah, this is the subconscious self defense.
Think of it as like antibodies, but much much worse. Come on,
and he ducks into the chicken restaurant rubber sharpish. I will follow same.
Okay, you enter the chicken, the abandoned chicken hut. Yeah it's
not looking very classy. I've been worse, but yeah. So the professor
is kind of looking around a little bit more frantically now checking the lights on
his devices. The device has lights. There you go. That's that's one.
It's got a little screen. It looks like an exploded game boy.
There you go, And he starts walking around. He says, if you
could just stop as being destroyed for a little while, I will try to
find a way out. Or you could help me try and find a way
out. That would be useful. So what do you guys want to do
While he's coons a way out, I will shoot four rockets at the nearest
wall. Okay, we knew this was coming the minute ago. I'm not
gonna lunch. You got to give the people what they want. I did
say, you like completely know how to use the rocket launch. You you
do know that firing at the wall of the building, your insight is probably
not going to end well for everyone. How about be met in particularly.
Okay, I guess everybody rolled me a decks. Check those of us who
have been in a party with Klaus for more than fifteen minutes, we get
advantage on that, right because we knew this ship was coming. Do you
tell anyone you're about to explode everything? I advantage them because yeah, you
know what's gonna happen. Sixteen everybody beat. Yeah, you've been in venturing
with Klauss long enough. Now you know he's a dick. As soon as
he got that rocket launch, you're like, oh no, this is gonna
end horribly. So you dive over the counter shoulder. Nope, yeah,
you blow up the wall. It's not a very well made place, man,
You probably could have just kicked it down, but no, this whole
place is now just has a smoking sort of frame where the wall used to
be. And now you see, the wave of red is close enough now
that you can make it out, and it appears to be thousands upon thousands
of chubby red wizards, sorcerers sprinting towards you, just making like a kind
of gibbering mass, like a bunch of weird sex chickens. Are they just
like gnome sized or what? Well, they're well, they're small because they're
far away. That doesn't mean they're gnomes, but it doesn't mean they're not.
No, Okay, roll me an intelligence check to see can be far
away? Far away? No, there must be nomes because that's a three.
Okay, Well, THEO says, holy shit, gnomes. The rest
of you could see. Probably not nos maybe just far away, but there's
thousands upon thousands of them, and they look a little bit crazed. You
can hear the rising cry of oh my, oh my, what those nomes?
You're just gonna chew the ship out of our kneecaps, guys, Professor
Goosewolder says, now, when I said look for a way out, I
didn't mean explode something. But well done, well done for taking some initiative.
Set nice to be appreciated. Okay, do you guys want to look
around? Are you're just waiting for the professor to do his thing? I
think I want to see how blown up Bjorg is and then probably killed him.
I appreciate it done, because I'm guessing that you're pretty toasty now.
H Yeah, there's sixteen points tip. Yeah, he's he's pretty. That's
pretty all right. I'm a little hurt because of your fireball. I thought
you were just hurt because I hurt your feelings for taking you away from your
that too, okay. One of those we don't have enough time, money,
or therapy to handle. And the other one of those, I'll burn
a cue. I'll burn a cure wounds on whiles again, and you can
have back. You're just rewarding him for blowing the place up. Yeah,
you can have fourteen head points. Thank you, solidarity from somebody who blew
some shit up. The cordon is going to do an another imagination die check
as he once more tries to summon his apple eaves. Okay, I'm really
terrified. You know what happens if I natural one again? This man grows
a penis. Man, Well, this is gonna this might balance things out.
You'll sword arm doubles in size and it's totally ripped, just one arm,
but choke that big. We could probably use that to carry a dick
around. But you now add five to wolf physical damage. Rolls. Oh
hey, that's pretty cool. An unarmed strike and swing your giant dick more
firmly. I like to imagine that like between the arm and then the other
guy. It just does look balanced out but just wrong. Oh man,
it's a shame you I'm go you can. You could draw that bevan.
That would be wonderful. That would enriches all. Okay, while you're doing
that, you know, it's kind of when you use your imagination powers,
the stampede of chubby red wizards gets louder, and you know, you're kind
of this is what's drawing attention to you. Every time you try and change
something in the world. The world seems to know. So yeah, they're
pretty close. But Professor says, come through here and there's like a freezer
room. So he says, yes, this is the nexus point for the
next level of the subconscious. Please do gather around before we are beaten to
death by pervert wizards. So I am a gnome. They are just far
away, it's like the north and here will they get so they're gonna grow
Just he just repeats exactly what he just said, but he's now talking to
Borg and not you. Okay, so he dabs a few buttons on his
exploded game boy. The good news is, I'm going to show everyone in
my chicken drawing anyway. You didn't search around the place, so you didn't
disturb the haunted chickens, so you don't have to fight them. Oh you
know, apparently, But yeah, I spent a lot of time on that,
so I'm showing you anyway. Okay, you close your eyes and the
world kind of warps out, and when it warps back in, it's a
familiar place. You will think that you've been here before. You've you've seen
this village on fire. We need to go back down in the world.
Oh well, that is a good point. Actually roll me perception while you're
kind of getting your bearings, Professor goose Waders, this is this will not
do at all. This is no where near where we need to be.
Class rolls are three nineteen uh eight, no six. Now I have to
ask myself, like, how well do your characters remember ship? Did they
remember episode one? Yes? I remember I was dying in a goddamn well.
Okay, yeah, this is definitely remembers the world. This is traumatic
enough that you remember it pretty clearly. You've been here before. They're supposed
to be a well in the middle of the of the courtyard, but there
is not, and everything is very on fire, to the point where it's
starting to sort of singe your body hair. For those who have bodies class
proof to the village. Since we were here, we'll see about that.
It feels like they might be missing that well about now, though undeniably an
unwise decision. But Gordon, you do notice. I'm going to give you
some credit for your intelligence that you're actually paying attention. There where there was
a well, there's now a stone tablet with a plaque on it. Gordon
will approach the plaque, but as soon as he gets close, the extra
helper bolts, like leans forward to snip it out. Okay, it's in
some kind of braille thing with your monstrous pain, and Gordon does not have
any idea what's going on. He's not involved. Okay, you see on
a plaque a riddle my specialty. Don't touch this with a dog. Oh
no, well, last no one. We could never solve the riddle says
I shine like gold, but often go to waste. You might want to
drink me, depending on your tastes. Well, there's a feme all right
of exploring a fee so some klous when the mimic was trying to eat you.
I have like one gimmick, right, and I did that. You
have like three gimmicks, and now it's time for you to perform number one.
I'm going to go walk into the fire and die. I have set
you on fire far too many times for you to think that will kill you.
You're not wrong. I don't I don't need some tablet to tell me
what to do. I know how to put out a fire. Okay.
I assume you're just gonna stop pissing on the floor that is, well,
on something that's on fire. Well, that is one way to answer the
riddle. Well done. The answer was pissed. Yeah. And as soon
as you do that, as soon as you make the kind of mental connection
like, well, there's only one realistic way to put out a fire,
the world fills with a familiar and unpleasant smell, and you hear a roaring,
as if a waterfall was approaching. The good news is the village won't
be on fire for long. Bad news is you're all about to drown in
a tidal wave of piss Next level, Next level, next level, next
level. Yeah, the professor is very, very enthusiastically mashing at his device
at the moment. I'm gonna cast mage hand and have it kind of floating
in front of my face to wipe pistol. Exactly. I get the feeling.
That's kind of like taking a It's what I got. I don't have
a giant, a giant self aware cock to don't end Jill Wiper with that.
I don't want to see that. You didn't look over a minute ago.
Fuck all right, roll perceptions except for you class. You're busy eighteen
Oh that's good. Twenty three borg while desperately looking for a way not to
drown a piss, are you noticed that the plaque is still there, but
the riddle has changed. It now reads you can see me, but I
have no weight. I get a little bigger with everything you take. This
one isn't horrible. It could be horrible, isn't his giant sent to deck
that certainly has wait the universe enters he with silence, personal look out.
Think it's a whole old well. Thank god for Gordon's penis number twenty seventeen
on ship. We never thought anyone would say, and wish they hadn't.
As Gordon's penis says, whole. Immediately a well rises up where it should
be. All right, Claus get it whole. Professor goose World said,
ah, yes, this is definitely an exus point. Come on, no
time to waste. I don't want to die in piss. Please, Maybe
I should not put out of the fire. You could stay to fire if
you want hero man, or you can go to the well. I'm going
to the well. Yeah, I'll be the first one in. This is
my home, we know. Yeah, okay, blue blue Blue, down
the well. You go. Reality seems to shift again. When it shifts
back, you're not entirely sure where you are. It's some kind of workshop.
There's lots of kind of aluminium cans around, some tools you don't really
know. There's like a glowing tablet on a table that seems to be playing
the adventures of some kind of revolutionary school girl. But don't it feels like
home. But the strangest thing is there's a red curtain at the back that
doesn't appear to be long there, and it's twitching kind of rhythmically. Don't
you may chand or open up? Yeah, I'll use may ch hands to
pull the curtain aside. It's pretty few to work. As soon as your
spectral hand begins to make the journey across the garage, a flash of green
light appears at a head looks down or you recognize it. It looks familiar.
You may have seen this guy face down in a puddle of beer and
pisson an Applebee's. The head looks down at you and says, pay no
attention to the man jerking off behind the curtain. May Chan stops believe me.
I'm not I have beheld the face of God. The head says,
kind of guy, just pass out on an Applebee's without being bothered anymore.
What are you fucking doing to my subconscious I'm looking for the exit in cash.
I'm trying to figure out how to bring my buddy here with me.
What is that pig? I'm like, oh, yep, I'm gonna roll
an imagination die. If ever there was a time take it away? Six.
Let me consult my shot. Six isn't good. I can tell you
that. I think that's going to depend entirely on your definitions. Yeah,
I've got a lot of use out of my natural walk. You haven't.
I No, I did go on to be such an advantage. You've really
spun that one around here for you're just gonna be That's how you can tell
it's his first time. DM. Yeah, he had no idea that what
he thought was going to be a big deal. The players were like,
oh, fuck that noise. I'm going over here and taking a ship in
the corner. Okay, six, you haven't changed, but suddenly you're dressed
in some kind of female school uniform, like some kind of revolutionary school goal,
very short shorts and big shoulder pads. You lose to AC, but
you do gain advantage in charisma. Check. Well, I thought I couldn't
get sex here. I'm personally very happy to see that you were wrong.
The head looks down. He says, this is the weirdest jerk off dream
I've ever had. Top three. Maybe work's just getting started, bab Okay.
The professor looks up from his device and he says, ah, whatever
we're looking for is definitely behind that curtain. Okay. The head takes some
kind of stick in its mouth and inhales a cloud of exhales a cloud of
vapor at you. It doesn't do anything. It is quite rude. I'll
use may chances to pull the curtain aside. Okay, as you do,
it reveals a figure who was indeed jerking off. They have kind of kind
of glassy looking now I don't like. Maybe this is all they do and
all they're supposed to do. And Klaus, you recognize the figure because it's
you. And the Professor walks up to it and goes, ah, yes,
this is the core of the subconscious. And he kind of sort of
skirts away from the jerking hand and all the business. We don't. He
manages to kind of reach up and whisper something in the Klaus's ear, the
real Klaus, or you know, maybe not the real the Klaus is jerking
off. Now. That doesn't narrow it down either, does. Its already
behind the the Klaus behind the curtain. He whispers something. You don't hear
what it is, Bathy does. He claps his hands together and says,
well, for less time to go. He hits a button and you were
back at the tavern. You were my best break, Gorded, Yes,
you'll Peetis is now tragically normal. No, what's tragic? Because he still
has the gaping hole in his pants. We can all see his crushing disappointment
in life to bring back his body. Klaus, you're addressed as you were.
Each of you have a hole in your heart from the fantastical times.
If you no longer have a rocket launcher, you no longer have like a
full foot penis. It's all very sad, but you're back in the real
world. And that professor goose Waddle says, well, thank you everybody,
And you look over at the unconscious man and he kind of starts awake,
and it just kind of staggers off home and said, there we go.
I'll get a quiet well done gentleman. Questions, Did I at least get
to catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror? Oh? As the no,
you never saw the true wonder of your outfoot well to see if we
were able to hear what he whispered. No, because that's in the past
now and I'm not going back there. This is dream travel, not time
travel. That will be the next game. I feel like I've learned things
that I wish I didn't learn. Well, still, somehow closer to Gordon
had a bonding experience their buddy. The professor said, oh, oh it
was the that was heartwarming, But it wasn't it was not supposed to be.
Yeah, the professor says, well, well done, gentlemen. As
you may have guessed reality, it seems are all kind of planes of inspirations,
some more robust than others. And that fella might not look like it,
but he's sort of my god. So the world I exist in is
rip but rather fragile. So by gaining an audience with what is probably my
creator, I was able to, let's say, just ensured that the next
time he thinks of me, he thinks of me kindly. In short,
gentlemen, I may have just secured my immortality. Now what you do at
the rest of your evening is up to you, and he well, first
I got to get paid. Bit he clinks down the gold and he says,
oh, enjoy it. It's just as real as you are. And
with that he fades away, and that is the end of our adventure for
today. Partisan Dragons brought you under a Creative Commons license, meaning you were
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