WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.800 --> 00:00:06.240 Successful individuals use coaching and mentorship to help them unlock their potential. Not all 2 00:00:06.280 --> 00:00:10.199 coaches are created equal, and that's why we work with the top five percent 3 00:00:10.240 --> 00:00:13.640 of coaches at Idemics. Welcome to Coaches you Need. Brought to you by 4 00:00:13.679 --> 00:00:22.960 Idemics. Welcome to Coaches to Know Podcasts short by Idea Mix Radio. This 5 00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:28.399 brief podcast is designed to demystify coaching and help you our audience, understand what 6 00:00:28.519 --> 00:00:32.640 coaching is and how it can help you. I'm your host, Jamie, 7 00:00:32.759 --> 00:00:37.960 and today I'm very excited to be here with Coach Lisa to talk about executive 8 00:00:38.159 --> 00:00:42.759 presence. I'm very briefly, I'm gonna introduce Coach Lisa. Coach Lisa has 9 00:00:42.759 --> 00:00:48.119 been coaching for sixteen years. She has been but she has been working for 10 00:00:48.159 --> 00:00:54.560 more than twenty years in organizational development and change management. She holds a master's 11 00:00:54.560 --> 00:01:00.600 degree and Positive Psychology Coaching at certifications and Neuroscience Gallop Sifting Strengths Assessments, three 12 00:01:00.920 --> 00:01:07.319 three sixty assessments, and others. Her clients are typically self aware leaders within 13 00:01:07.480 --> 00:01:14.519 organizations who want to have a positive impact on those around them. And what 14 00:01:14.560 --> 00:01:19.799 I really love is that Lisa defines a leader as anyone trying to influence or 15 00:01:19.879 --> 00:01:26.879 lead others towards a common goal or outcome so we can all be leaders. 16 00:01:26.719 --> 00:01:34.480 She also works with entrepreneurs and mentors new coaches working towards their IF certification. 17 00:01:34.079 --> 00:01:38.840 Lisa, thank you so much for joining us here today. Thank you, 18 00:01:38.959 --> 00:01:42.719 Jamie. I'm excited to dive into this topic with you. So, as 19 00:01:42.760 --> 00:01:47.239 I said, today, we're going to discuss executive presence. I always like 20 00:01:47.280 --> 00:01:53.280 to start by coming up with a general understanding or definition of what our topic 21 00:01:53.400 --> 00:01:57.840 is. So what is executive presence and what is not or are there any 22 00:01:57.879 --> 00:02:02.000 misconceptions around on what it is and is it? Yeah? I think executive 23 00:02:02.040 --> 00:02:07.280 presence is a really fascinating topic because it's one of those things that people look 24 00:02:07.280 --> 00:02:09.280 at and they say, ooh, I want more of that, but they 25 00:02:09.280 --> 00:02:14.360 don't really stop and think about what exactly that is. And if you take 26 00:02:14.400 --> 00:02:21.319 the words apart, it basically means being present or showing up like an executive. 27 00:02:21.919 --> 00:02:24.319 And I think one of the interesting things, especially in today's world, 28 00:02:24.520 --> 00:02:30.599 is when we think about kind of the standard executive, we might think about, 29 00:02:30.639 --> 00:02:32.680 you know, somebody who's tall. We might think about a man, 30 00:02:32.840 --> 00:02:38.400 We might think about a three piece suit. We might think about showing up 31 00:02:38.520 --> 00:02:43.960 very authoritatively, knowing all the answers, being very commanding, and we might 32 00:02:44.039 --> 00:02:50.439 have the stereotypical ideas of what an executive looks like. And in today's world, 33 00:02:50.599 --> 00:02:54.960 we're so much more aware of the diversity of executives and the diversity of 34 00:02:55.039 --> 00:03:00.479 executive presence, and so I would say these days it's very individual. It 35 00:03:00.520 --> 00:03:05.360 depends on who the person is, how they're trying to show up, and 36 00:03:05.400 --> 00:03:08.280 what it is that they're trying to show up for. Because different organizations will 37 00:03:08.280 --> 00:03:14.759 have different cultures around how they expect executive presence to be demonstrated. That's why 38 00:03:14.800 --> 00:03:19.120 I really like coaching on this because there is no one size fits all, 39 00:03:19.560 --> 00:03:23.879 But how do you show up in the leadership or executive way that you would 40 00:03:23.960 --> 00:03:28.319 like to and what is it that's going to work best for you and your 41 00:03:28.439 --> 00:03:32.240 environment and that mixture that's in between that kind of ven diagram, If that 42 00:03:32.280 --> 00:03:38.439 makes sense. Yeah, absolutely, I really love having you sitting hit the 43 00:03:38.479 --> 00:03:40.599 nail of the head. I mean, obviously, when I think of executive 44 00:03:40.599 --> 00:03:44.879 presence, I will tell you straight up that, like I think of that 45 00:03:44.919 --> 00:03:49.879 man and the three piece suit, And now that you know in our society. 46 00:03:49.879 --> 00:03:53.120 Well, we're much more aware, and you know, there are more 47 00:03:53.240 --> 00:03:59.439 than just men in power positions. You know, that stereotype no longer, 48 00:04:00.639 --> 00:04:03.879 you know. I think we're also moving away from more from this hierarchical, 49 00:04:04.120 --> 00:04:14.599 authoritative structure of operating as well. But I like what you said. Just 50 00:04:14.639 --> 00:04:19.560 to clarify though, it's really about showing up in a way where you can 51 00:04:19.639 --> 00:04:26.120 have impact based on your environment and based on who you are. Yeah, 52 00:04:26.160 --> 00:04:29.399 and again, a lot of people tend to think of executive presence as I 53 00:04:29.439 --> 00:04:32.639 need to have all the answers. I would say that's not even necessarily true. 54 00:04:33.240 --> 00:04:39.160 You can show up very I'm going to keep using the word authoritatively, 55 00:04:39.240 --> 00:04:43.639 but that means different things. And you can show up very authoritatively and ask 56 00:04:43.680 --> 00:04:47.839 a lot of questions. You can show up as executive presence and not know 57 00:04:48.079 --> 00:04:53.439 what's going on and learn and try to get the lay of the landscape. 58 00:04:53.800 --> 00:04:59.759 You can show up with executive presence and involve other people very heavily and delegate 59 00:05:00.040 --> 00:05:03.040 a lot. You know, that's also part of executive presence. So I 60 00:05:03.079 --> 00:05:08.120 think one of the benefits of coaching is we can help individuals get clear on 61 00:05:08.160 --> 00:05:12.759 what do they mean by executive presence. Who do they admire, who do 62 00:05:12.800 --> 00:05:16.480 they think demonstrates executive presence, and what can they learn from them? And 63 00:05:16.519 --> 00:05:20.959 then how does that help you show up in your leadership best whatever that looks 64 00:05:21.000 --> 00:05:27.680 like? Great, thank you so much for that for their explanation. So 65 00:05:27.720 --> 00:05:33.399 how does someone know that they may need help developing their executive presence? Yeah, 66 00:05:33.759 --> 00:05:40.079 they signs If there are signs, yeah, I would say typically there 67 00:05:40.120 --> 00:05:44.759 are two things. One is our own sense of I would like to develop 68 00:05:44.800 --> 00:05:48.079 more executive presence, and I work with a lot of clients who have that 69 00:05:48.240 --> 00:05:53.720 inner knowing or that inner inkling like I would like to show up more like 70 00:05:53.959 --> 00:05:58.199 a leader, more like an executive, with more authority, with more confidence, 71 00:05:58.319 --> 00:06:00.240 you know, with more charisma, whatever that looks like for them. 72 00:06:01.000 --> 00:06:04.639 And then the second is we might get feedback from other people. Now, 73 00:06:04.680 --> 00:06:09.959 sometimes feedback from other people can be a little frustrating because someone might say, 74 00:06:10.040 --> 00:06:13.800 hey, Lisa, I think you could benefit from more executive presence, and 75 00:06:13.839 --> 00:06:17.079 then they leave and I don't really know what to do with that. So 76 00:06:17.120 --> 00:06:23.720 being able to break down executive presence into some behaviors like is this about tone 77 00:06:23.759 --> 00:06:28.879 of voice? Is this about eye contact? Is this about what I'm wearing, 78 00:06:28.959 --> 00:06:32.120 because let's recognize that what we wear can affect how people see us and 79 00:06:32.160 --> 00:06:36.959 if they see us as leaders or not. Is this about my knowledge base 80 00:06:38.120 --> 00:06:44.600 because maybe I'm asking what I might call rookie questions and people are expecting more 81 00:06:44.639 --> 00:06:48.120 of me at that time. Or is this about I'm holding everything to myself 82 00:06:48.160 --> 00:06:51.600 and I do need to delegate and involve others more, and how to do 83 00:06:51.680 --> 00:06:58.680 that with executive presence. I will also say that sometimes our own inner inklings 84 00:06:58.879 --> 00:07:02.480 are not matching the feedback, and so we may feel that we need more 85 00:07:02.519 --> 00:07:06.920 executive presence, but we're not actually getting that feedback from other people, and 86 00:07:06.959 --> 00:07:11.800 so it's worth checking in with both sources. How am I feeling, how 87 00:07:11.839 --> 00:07:15.519 are other people feeling? What feedback can I get from within and from without? 88 00:07:16.040 --> 00:07:19.879 And then how does that help me narrow down on what is it that 89 00:07:20.000 --> 00:07:24.600 I'm already good at, What am I already doing well that helps me with 90 00:07:24.680 --> 00:07:30.000 executive presence? And where are some of those behaviors where I could tend to 91 00:07:30.040 --> 00:07:34.360 grow And there might be mindsets behind some of those behaviors, but typically executive 92 00:07:34.399 --> 00:07:42.199 presence is about projecting something through your words and your actions that other people are 93 00:07:42.240 --> 00:07:45.839 going to pick up on. So I think it's worth checking in with both 94 00:07:45.839 --> 00:07:53.279 sources on that. Yeah, I tend to think of when we think about 95 00:07:53.360 --> 00:07:56.480 executive presence, and because it's the way you show up, it's a form 96 00:07:56.519 --> 00:08:03.279 of communication, and how are you communicate with wherever you're showing up to, 97 00:08:03.839 --> 00:08:09.199 right, And it's not about this is not just a verbal communication, right, 98 00:08:09.920 --> 00:08:11.199 It can also be just busy. You were saying, like the way 99 00:08:11.240 --> 00:08:18.240 you're dressed, your pasture, you know, the whole host of things, 100 00:08:18.800 --> 00:08:22.839 your eye contact, how much time you are spending with people you know. 101 00:08:22.879 --> 00:08:28.879 People also talk about charisma, for example, and how there are certain politicians 102 00:08:28.879 --> 00:08:31.120 who are really good at looking at you and making you feel like you are 103 00:08:31.159 --> 00:08:35.559 the only person who matters in that moment when you've got like a thousand other 104 00:08:35.600 --> 00:08:41.080 people in the press around you. There are some people who naturally seem to 105 00:08:41.120 --> 00:08:46.679 come by this, But there are learnable skills and behaviors in there, and 106 00:08:46.720 --> 00:08:50.120 there are coaches who will work with you on how you dress and how you 107 00:08:50.200 --> 00:08:56.320 look, and you can get presentation coaches on how you do a presentation and 108 00:08:56.360 --> 00:09:00.200 what you do with your voice. Like there are a lot of people out 109 00:09:00.200 --> 00:09:05.279 there who will help you with the different behaviors of more executive presence. And 110 00:09:05.320 --> 00:09:07.240 that's why I can be helpful to break it down and find out where are 111 00:09:07.279 --> 00:09:11.120 you doing well and where are other people seeing that? Yeah, like there 112 00:09:11.159 --> 00:09:16.519 might be room for some tweaking here. Yeah, yeah, So can we 113 00:09:16.600 --> 00:09:20.360 delve in a little bit, you know, definitely we've touched upon a little 114 00:09:20.360 --> 00:09:26.200 bit sort of what coach, how coaching can help somebody develop executive presence. 115 00:09:26.480 --> 00:09:31.200 But let's let's can you lay out like a process, maybe our approach that 116 00:09:31.240 --> 00:09:35.879 you use with with people or you know, how does coach? What does 117 00:09:35.879 --> 00:09:41.639 coaching do and why is it so impactful in this area of developing these skills 118 00:09:41.679 --> 00:09:46.240 or these behaviors? Yeah? Great, great question. I would say if 119 00:09:46.279 --> 00:09:48.000 I have a client. Let's imagine Jamie, that you come to me and 120 00:09:48.080 --> 00:09:52.080 you say, Lisa, I have been told that I should work on my 121 00:09:52.159 --> 00:09:56.080 executive presence, and I agree with this. I would like to work on 122 00:09:56.120 --> 00:09:58.440 my executive presence. Well, the first thing I'm going to ask you about 123 00:09:58.720 --> 00:10:05.279 is what does executive presence mean to you? What is the specific feedback that 124 00:10:05.360 --> 00:10:09.440 you have received, what's important about this for you now? In this current 125 00:10:09.519 --> 00:10:15.120 situation is this about, you know, maybe a board of directors, or 126 00:10:15.279 --> 00:10:18.080 is this about growing in your career, or is this about helping you find 127 00:10:18.159 --> 00:10:24.440 more confidence in yourself? Like what is the real meaning and motivation behind all 128 00:10:24.519 --> 00:10:30.600 of this? And I would want to dive into your strengths where this is 129 00:10:30.679 --> 00:10:35.039 already working well. And that might be strengths from a leadership assessment like the 130 00:10:35.120 --> 00:10:39.360 Gallop Clifton Strengths Finder or another one. It could also come from assessments that 131 00:10:39.399 --> 00:10:45.039 you may have done in the workplace. So there's all sorts of personality assessments 132 00:10:45.039 --> 00:10:48.480 out there, leadership assessments and so on. You may already have things that 133 00:10:48.480 --> 00:10:52.000 you're going to bring into a coaching situation. We'll sit down and pull those 134 00:10:52.080 --> 00:10:56.159 apart. And it might also be your own sense of your strengths and feedback 135 00:10:56.200 --> 00:10:58.200 that you've gotten from other people. But I want to know what's already working 136 00:10:58.279 --> 00:11:03.639 for you. Quite often with a client, once we pull apart what is 137 00:11:03.720 --> 00:11:09.279 already working, sometimes it's about doubling down on that and owning it and recognizing 138 00:11:09.360 --> 00:11:13.480 like, yeah, I've been using this in a smaller way, like maybe 139 00:11:13.559 --> 00:11:18.519 I'm very confident when I'm presenting to my team and the small group of peers 140 00:11:18.519 --> 00:11:22.159 who I know really well. I'm not showing up as confident when I'm doing 141 00:11:22.200 --> 00:11:26.759 board presentation. So we can leverage what's working into other areas that you want 142 00:11:26.759 --> 00:11:31.360 to grow into, and that helps your executive presence. And sometimes there's something 143 00:11:31.440 --> 00:11:35.480 completely new. Right, this is genuinely an area that is not working well 144 00:11:35.519 --> 00:11:39.519 for you. It might be career limiting or getting in the way of your 145 00:11:39.559 --> 00:11:45.080 goal, and it's worth diving into there. And so if you have found 146 00:11:45.080 --> 00:11:48.559 an area that you want to improve on, I might ask you questions like 147 00:11:48.720 --> 00:11:52.360 when have you done this well, even if it's in a very small capacity 148 00:11:52.519 --> 00:11:54.879 or something outside of work, or when did you use to do this well? 149 00:11:56.320 --> 00:11:58.240 If that's not working, if you have no examples, I would ask 150 00:11:58.279 --> 00:12:03.879 who else do you know who does this well? Where are exemplars in your 151 00:12:03.960 --> 00:12:07.320 life? Whether there are people that you know they could be family members even, 152 00:12:07.559 --> 00:12:13.600 or friends or bosses or colleagues or mentors or people that you've read about, 153 00:12:15.039 --> 00:12:18.879 right, like you want to have you know something that Oprah does really 154 00:12:18.919 --> 00:12:24.039 well or whoever that role model happens to be for you. And then if 155 00:12:24.080 --> 00:12:26.840 that's proving difficult, I might also ask, well, just like who could 156 00:12:26.879 --> 00:12:31.879 encourage you right, Who could you get on your side as you are developing 157 00:12:31.919 --> 00:12:37.600 this, Who could help give you the feedback in real time because as a 158 00:12:37.679 --> 00:12:39.759 coach, we're going to talk let's say, you know, every two weeks, 159 00:12:41.279 --> 00:12:45.360 but then you're going to go out and practice outside of that time. 160 00:12:46.080 --> 00:12:50.480 So who can help you when you are practicing? Who can watch you in 161 00:12:50.600 --> 00:12:54.559 action? Who can give you the encouragement, who can catch you doing things 162 00:12:54.639 --> 00:12:58.440 right and give you that positive feedback. Who can you bounce ideas off of? 163 00:13:00.039 --> 00:13:03.519 And that's especially helpful if you're trying to work within a certain context. 164 00:13:03.080 --> 00:13:07.600 And then after that, quite honestly, Jamie, it's a lot of practice, 165 00:13:07.960 --> 00:13:11.799 and it's a lot of experimentation, and these things typically feel awkward at 166 00:13:11.840 --> 00:13:16.759 first because these are skills tying your shoe, riding a bicycle, learning how 167 00:13:16.759 --> 00:13:22.440 to swim right, whatever it is. They all feel really awkward at first. 168 00:13:22.519 --> 00:13:24.519 You think about the first time you held a tennis racket or a golf 169 00:13:24.519 --> 00:13:26.879 club right, like, it's weird, what do you mean I have to 170 00:13:26.919 --> 00:13:31.759 like put my thumbs this way and hold it just like this, Like it's 171 00:13:31.960 --> 00:13:37.240 very awkward. But then over time it becomes more comfortable and over time you 172 00:13:37.320 --> 00:13:41.080 become much more effective at it. And so what we would do in coaching 173 00:13:41.159 --> 00:13:45.320 is continue to work on every two weeks or so when we meet what did 174 00:13:45.320 --> 00:13:48.080 you try, how did it go, What did you learn, and now 175 00:13:48.159 --> 00:13:54.960 what and just continue to build and develop those skills to the point where you 176 00:13:54.039 --> 00:14:01.000 move past the kind of conscious incompetence and into being more consciously competent and then 177 00:14:01.080 --> 00:14:05.200 just into the flow. This is just a new skill that you have and 178 00:14:05.240 --> 00:14:11.320 you can use it automatically. I love that the way of thinking about it 179 00:14:11.360 --> 00:14:16.360 is like, this is a skill that you can develop and it takes practice. 180 00:14:16.480 --> 00:14:20.200 I mean that's something that we learn from when we were very young, 181 00:14:20.440 --> 00:14:24.840 and it just makes you know, it's very it makes it very digestible and 182 00:14:24.879 --> 00:14:31.080 achievable. And I love the role of coaching to diagnose and then really come 183 00:14:31.159 --> 00:14:35.159 in and help create a plositive feedback loop so that you can keep improving, 184 00:14:37.720 --> 00:14:41.279 which is sort of sort of what I think you were just describing that process, 185 00:14:41.360 --> 00:14:46.919 Yeah, of really just honing in and making sure that you're aware of 186 00:14:48.039 --> 00:14:50.360 what's happening and what progress is being made and where you can get still grow. 187 00:14:52.120 --> 00:14:54.879 So I love that, Lisa, that is all the time that we 188 00:14:54.960 --> 00:15:00.240 have today. We have, but thank you so much for joining us to 189 00:15:00.279 --> 00:15:03.720 our audience. If you would like to work with Coach Lisa or any of 190 00:15:03.759 --> 00:15:09.720 other our other qualified coaches, please visit videamx dot com. Thank you, 191 00:15:11.639 --> 00:15:16.519 thanks for listening. Please subscribe wherever you listen and leave us a review. 192 00:15:16.279 --> 00:15:22.000 Find your ideal coach at www dot vidmx dot com. Special thanks to our 193 00:15:22.039 --> 00:15:24.840 producer Martin Maluski and singer songwriter Doug Allen.