WEBVTT

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Introduction to Footsteps of Fate by Luis
Couperus. This is a LibriVox recording.

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All LibriVox recordings are in the public
domain. For more information or to volunteer,

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please visit LibriVox dot org. Introduction
the Dutch Sensitivists by Edmund Goss.

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In the intellectual history of all countries, we find the same phenomenon incessantly recurring.

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New writers, new artists, new
composers arise in revolt against what has

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delighted their grandfathers and satisfied their fathers. These young men, pressed together at

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first by external opposition into a serried
phalanx, gradually win their way, become

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themselves the delight and then the satisfaction
of their contemporaries, and falling apart as

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successes secure to them, come to
seem lax, defeats and obsolete to a

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new race of youths who effect a
fresh esthetic revolution. In small communities.

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These movements are often to be observed
more precisely than in larger ones, but

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they are very tardily perceived by foreigners. The established authorities in art and literature,

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retaining their exclusive place in dictionaries and
handbooks long after the claim of their

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juniors to be observed with attention has
been practically conceded at home. For this

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reason, partly and partly also because
the mental life of Holland receives little attention

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in this country. No account has
yet been taken of the revolution in Dutch

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taste which has occupied the last six
or seven years. I believe that the

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present occasion is the first on which
it has been brought to the notice of

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any English speaking public. There exists, however, in Holland at this moment,

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a group of young writers, most
of them between thirty five and twenty

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five years of age, who exhibit
a violent seal for literature, passing often

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into extravagance, who repudiate sometimes with
ferocity. There rare the sleepy Dutch authorship

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of the last forty years, and
who are held together or crushed together by

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the weight of antiquated taste and indifference
to executive merit which they experience around them.

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Certain facts seem to be undeniable,
First that every young man of letters

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in Holland whose work is really promising
has joined the camp. And secondly,

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that with all the ferment and crudity
inseparable from prose and verse composed in direct

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opposition to existing canons of taste.
The poems and the stories of these young

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Dutchmen are often full of beauty and
delicacy. They have read much in their

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boyhood. They have imitated Rosetti and
Keats. They have been fascinated by certain

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Frenchmen, by flood Ware, by
Goncour, particularly by Weismanns, who is

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a far away kinsman of their own. They have studied the disquieting stories of

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Edgar Poe. But these exotic influences
are passing away, and those who know

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something of current Dutch belllectra can realize
best how imperatively a plowing up of the

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phlegmatic tradition of Dutch thoughts was required
before a new crop of imagination could spring

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up, rejecting the conventional aspects of
contemporary Dutch literature. I will now attempt

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to give some sketch of the present
situation as it appears to a foreign critic

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observing the field without prejudice. The
latest novelist of great importance was Madame Gertrude

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Boss born Toussaint, who was born
in eighteen twenty one. After having written

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a long series of historical romances for
nearly forty years, this intelligent woman and

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careful writer broke with her own assured
post public had took up the discussion of

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psychological questions. She treated the problem
of socialism in Raymond de schein Wecker and

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the status of women in Major France. Madame Bospon Toussain died in eighteen eighty

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six, just too early to welcome
the new school of writers, with whom

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she would probably have had more sympathy
than any of her contemporaries. Her place

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in popular esteem was taken for a
short time by miss Obsomer he S.

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C. Wallace, whose long novels
have been translated into English in Dargen van

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Stride, in Troubled Times and forced
ungunst Royal Favour. She had genuine talent,

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but her style was heavy and tedious. After the new wind began to

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blow, although she was still young, she married, went to Hungary and

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gave up writing novels. Three authors
of importance, each by a curious coincidence,

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born in the year eighteen twenty six, fill up the interval between the

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old and new generation. These are
Decca, buskan Witt, and vos Mar

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Edward Douvers. Decca, whose novel
Max Havilah dates from eighteen fifty eight,

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was a man of exceptional genius.
Bred in the interior of Java, he

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observed the social conditions of life in
the Dutch Indies as no one else had

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done, but his one great book
remained a solitary one. He died in

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eighteen eighty seven without having justified the
very high hopes awakened by that extraordinary and

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revolutionary work. The career of Conrad
Buskin Houitt was very different. The principal

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literary critic of Holland in his generation, he aimed at being the sad Buth

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of the Dutch, and in his
early days as the dreaded thrasibulus of journalism,

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he did much to awaken thought.
His volumes of criticism are extremely numerous

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and exercised a wholesome influence during his
own time. He died in Paris in

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April eighteen eighty six. These two
writers have had a strong effect on the

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prose style of the younger school of
essayists and novelists. They lived long enough

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to observe the dawn of the new
literature, and their relations with the latest

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writers were cordial, if somewhat reserved. What Duva Stecca and Buskin Huet did

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in prose was effected in poetry by
Carol Vussmer. This estimable man, who

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died in eighteen eighty eight, was
well known throughout Europe as an art critic

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and an authority on Rembrandts. In
Holland, he was pre eminent as the

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soul of a literary newspaper, the
Nederlanska Spectator, which took an independence line

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in literary criticism and affected to lead
public taste in dad directions less provincial and

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old fashioned than the rest of the
Dutch press. Vosmar wrote also several volumes

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of more or less fantastic poetry,
a translation of Homer into Alexandrian's and an

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antiquarian novel, Amazona eighteen eighty one. But voss Mayer's position was above all

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that of a precursor. He and
he alone saw that a new thing must

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be made in Dutch poetical literature.
He and he alone was not satisfied with

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the stereotyped Batavian tradition. At the
same time, Vossmar was not, it

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may be admitted, strong enough himself
to found a new school, perhaps even

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in his later days. The Olympian
calm which he affected, and a certain

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elegant indolence which overcame him, may
have made him unsympathetic to the ardent and

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the juvenile. At all events,
the singular phenomenon has occurred. He who

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have all living Dutchman was ten or
fifteen years ago, fretting under the poverty

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of thought and imagination in his fatherland
and longing for the new era to arrive.

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He is at this moment the one
man of the last generation who is

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most exposed to that unseemly ferosita de
June, which is the ugliest feature of

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these esthetic revolutions. I have just
been reading with real pain the violent attack

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on vos Mayer and his influence,
which has been published by that very clever

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young poet mister Villum Close, the
New Vegheds, December eighteen ninety. All

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that cheers me is to know that
the whirligig of time will not forget its

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revenges, and that if mister Close
only lives long enough, he will find

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somebody now unborn to call him a
bloodless puppet of one other representative of the

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transitional period, Marcellus Emmenced say Little. He wrote a poem Lilith and several

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short stories. Much was expected of
him, but I know not what has

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been the result. The inaugurator of
the New School was Jacques Perk, a

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young poet of indubitable genius. He
was influenced to some degree by Shelley and

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by the Florence of the Dutch browning
Potchita. He wrote in eighteen eighty A

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Matilda, for which he could find
no publisher. Presently died. Had began

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to be famous on the posthumous issue
of his poems, edited by Vossmer and

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Close in eighteen eighty three. The
sonnets of Perk, like those of Bulls

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with Us one hundred years ago,
were the heralds of a whole new poetic

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literature. The resistance made to the
young writers who now began to express themselves,

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and their experience that all the doors
of periodical publication in Holland were closed

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to them, led to the foundation
in eighteen eighty five of de Nuverheed's arrival

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to the old Dutch quarterly Deheds.
In this new Review, which has steadily

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maintained and improved its position, most
of the principal productions of the New School

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have appeared. The first three numbers
contained Decliner Johannes Little Johnny of Doctor Friedrich

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van Aiden, the first considerable prose
work of the younger generation. This is

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a charming romance, fantastic and refined, half symbolical, half realistic, which

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deserves to be known to English readers. It has been highly appreciated in Holland.

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To this followed two powerful books by
L. Van Deesel, Ein Leifte

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a Love and Decliner Republique The Little
Republic. Van Deesel has written with great

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force, but he has hitherto been
the enfon terrible of the school, the

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one who is claim aimed with most
insolence to say precisely what has occurred to

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him. To say, he has
been influenced more than the rest by the

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latest French literature. While speaking of
the New School, it is difficult to

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restrain from mentioning others of those whose
work in the Nieu Vahids and elsewhere has

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raised hopes of high performance in the
future. Jacques van Ley, a painter

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by profession, has published, among
other things, an exquisitely finished volume of

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prota prose essays. Franz Netzka,
who deliberately marches in step with the French

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Realists is the George Moore of Holland. He has published a variety of small

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sketches and one or two novels.
Hari Prince, under the pseudonym of Copeland,

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has written some very good studies of
life. Among the poets Avilem Close,

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Albert Vervey, and Hermanhorta, each
of whom deserves a far more careful

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critical consideration than can here be given
to him. Philem Close, indeed,

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may be considered as the leader of
the school since the death of Perk.

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It was to Close that in the
period from eighteen eighty to eighteen eighty five

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each of the new writers went in
secret for encouragement, criticism and sympathy.

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He appears to be a man of
very remarkable character, violent and passionate in

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his public utterances. He is adored
by his own colleagues and disciples, and

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one of the most gifted of them
has told me that Close has never made

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a serious mistake in his estimate of
the force of a man or a book.

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His writings, however, are very
few, and his tone in controversy

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is acrid and uncompromising. As I
have already indicated, he remains the least

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known and the least liked, though
the most powerful of the band. The

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member of a new generation whose verse
and prose alike have one most acceptance is

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certainly Fredrik van Eden. His cycle
of lyrical verse Ellen eighteen ninety one is

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doubtless the most exquisite product of recent
Dutch literature, for the peculiar quality which

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unites in one movement the varied elements
of the school which I have attempted thus

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briefly to describe. The name sensitivism
has been invented by one of themselves,

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by Van Diesel. It is a
development of Impressionism grafted upon naturalism. As

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a frail and exotic bud may be
set in the rough basis of a thorn.

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It preserves the delicacy of sensation of
the one, and strengthens it by

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the exactitude and conscientiousness of the other. Yet without giving way to the vagaries

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of impressionism or to the brutality of
mere realism, it selects and refines.

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It re embracesancy that's maiden so rudely
turned out of house and home by the

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naturalists. It aims, in fact, at retaining the best, and nothing

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but the best of the experiments of
the French during the last quarter of a

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century. Vandesel greets Lajent with elaborate
courtesy, with the respect due to a

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fallen divinity. He calls his friends
in Holland to attend the gorgeous funeral of

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naturalism, which is dead, but
urges them not to sacrifice their own living

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sensitivism to the imitation of what is
absolutely a matter of past history. It

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will be seen that Dutch sensitivism is
not, by any means unlike French symbolism,

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and we might expect prose like Malamaise
and verse like Mariases. As a

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matter of fact, however, the
Dutch seem, in their general attitude of

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reserve, to leave their mother tongue
unassailed and to be as intelligible as their

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inspiration allows them to be. Be. To one of these writers, however,

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and to one of the youngest,
it is time that I should turn.

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The first member of the new Dutch
school to be presented in the following

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pages to English readers is Louis Marie
Anne Kuperus. Of him, as the

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author of this book, I must
give a fuller biography, although he is

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still too young to occupy much space
by the record of his achievements. Luis

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Kuperus was born on the tenth of
June eighteen sixty three at the Hague,

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where he spent the first ten years
of his life. He was then taken

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in company with his family to Java
and resided five years in Batavia, returning

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to the Hague, where he completed
his education. He began to make teaching

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his profession, but gradually drifted into
devoting himself entirely to literature. He published

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a little volume of verses in eighteen
eighty four, and another of more importance

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called Orchidean Orchids in eighteen eighty seven. Oriental and luscious. But he has

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succeeded, as everyone allows, much
better in prose. His long novel of

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modern life in the Hague, called
Elena Vera, which ran through the reeds

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and was published in book form in
eighteen eighty nine, is an admirable performance

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of nod Lot literally to be translated
Fate or Destiny eighteen ninety. Our readers

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will now judge for themselves. Mister
Kuperis is at present engaged, as he

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tells me on a novel called Extaza
Ecstasy, such as the brief chronicle of

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a writer from whom much is expected
by the best critics of his own country.

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End of introduction, Section one of
Footsteps of Fate by Luis Kuperus,

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translated by Clara Bell. This is
a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are

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in the public domain. For more
information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox

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dot org. Part one one.
His hands in his pockets and the collar

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of his fur coat turned up,
Frank was making his way one evening through

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squalls of snow along the deserted length
of Adelaide Road. As he approached the

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villa where he lived. White Rose
Cottage was called sunk buried, wrapped in

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white snow like a nest in cotton
wool. He was aware of someone coming

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to meet him from Primrose Hill.
He looked steadily in the man's face,

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since he evidently intended to address him, doubting as to what his purpose might

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be this lonely snowy night, and
he was greatly surprised when he heard said

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in Dutch, pardon the intrusion,
Are you not, mister Vesthova, Yes,

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replied Frank Vesthova, Who are you? What do you want? I

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am Robert van Mehren. You may
perhaps remember what you Bertie, cried Frank.

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How came you here in London?
And in his amazement, there rose

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up before him through the driving snow, a vision of his youth, A

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pleasing picture of boyish friendship, of
something young and warm. Not altogether by

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chance, said the other, whose
voice had taken on a somewhat more confident

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tone at the sound of the familiar
Bertie. I knew that you lived here,

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and I have been to your door
three times, but you had not

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come in. Your maid said you
were expected at home this evening, and

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I made so bold as to wait
here for you. And again his voice

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lost its firmness and assumed the imploring
accent of a beggar. Is your business

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so urgent? Then asked Frank in
surprise, Yes, I want, Perhaps

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00:19:03.599 --> 00:19:07.519
you could help me. I know
no one here. Where are you living

202
00:19:07.319 --> 00:19:11.319
nowhere? I only arrived here early
this morning, and I have I have

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00:19:11.440 --> 00:19:18.000
no money. He was shivering from
standing in the cold during this short dialogue

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00:19:18.359 --> 00:19:22.759
and seemed to shrink into himself,
almost fawning like a cowed dog. Come

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00:19:22.799 --> 00:19:27.720
in with me, said Frank,
greatly astonished but full of sympathy, and

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00:19:27.799 --> 00:19:33.599
of the affectionate reminiscences of his boyhood. Come and spend the night with me.

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00:19:33.640 --> 00:19:37.880
Oh, gladly, was the reply, eager and tremulous, as if

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he feared that the heaven inspired words
might be retracted. They went together a

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00:19:45.160 --> 00:19:48.200
few steps further. Then Frank took
a key out of his pocket, the

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00:19:48.279 --> 00:19:55.039
key of White Rose Cottage. He
opened the door. A hexangonal Moorish lantern

211
00:19:55.160 --> 00:19:59.720
was burning low and shed a soft
light in the hall. Go in,

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00:20:00.119 --> 00:20:03.799
said Frank, and he locked the
door and bolted it behind them. It

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00:20:03.960 --> 00:20:08.720
was half past twelve. The maid
had not yet gone to bed. That

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00:20:08.960 --> 00:20:14.519
gentleman called here a little while ago. Two or three times she murmured with

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00:20:14.599 --> 00:20:18.240
a look of suspicion at Bertie.
And I've seen him hanging about all the

216
00:20:18.319 --> 00:20:22.000
evening as if he was on the
watch. I was frightened, you know,

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00:20:22.559 --> 00:20:27.240
it's so lonely in these parts.
Frank shook his head reassuringly. Make

218
00:20:27.279 --> 00:20:30.599
the fire up as quickly as possible, Annie, is your husband still up

219
00:20:32.400 --> 00:20:36.440
the fire? Sir? Yes,
Bertie. Will you have something to eat?

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00:20:37.319 --> 00:20:41.559
Gladly if it gives you no trouble? Replied Bertie in English, for

221
00:20:41.640 --> 00:20:45.279
the benefit of the maid, and
he looked with an insinuating expression to meet

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00:20:45.319 --> 00:20:51.359
the surprised, cold blue eyes of
the neat, brisk young woman. His

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00:20:51.519 --> 00:20:56.319
voice was persuasive and low. He
tried to take as little room as possible

224
00:20:56.319 --> 00:21:00.279
in the small hall, and to
avoid her gaze, seemed to shrink to

225
00:21:00.319 --> 00:21:06.160
efface himself in a corner where the
shadow fell. Frank led the way into

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00:21:06.240 --> 00:21:10.599
a large back room, cold and
dark when they entered, but soon lighted

227
00:21:10.680 --> 00:21:15.559
up, and before long genially warmed
by the huge fire which blazed up in

228
00:21:15.640 --> 00:21:22.200
the grate. Annie laid the table
sapper for one, sir, nay for

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00:21:22.279 --> 00:21:26.720
two. I will eat something,
said Frank, thinking that Bertie would feel

230
00:21:26.720 --> 00:21:33.440
more at his ease at his friend's
invitation. The visitor had seated himself in

231
00:21:33.480 --> 00:21:37.160
a large armchair by the fire,
and there he sat bolt upright, without

232
00:21:37.200 --> 00:21:42.960
speaking, feeling shy before the woman
who came and went. And now in

233
00:21:44.039 --> 00:21:48.680
the light, Frank could see the
poverty of his appearance, his thin shabby

234
00:21:48.720 --> 00:21:55.079
coat shining with grease and bereft of
buttons, his worn fringed trousers, his

235
00:21:55.200 --> 00:22:00.279
dirty comforter hiding a lack of under
linen, his ripped and slipshod shoes oose.

236
00:22:00.519 --> 00:22:06.359
In his confusion and awkwardness, he
still held his battered hat. This

237
00:22:06.519 --> 00:22:11.480
garb accorded ill with the aristocratic elegance
of his figure, the thin, pale,

238
00:22:11.559 --> 00:22:15.400
chiseled features, full of distinction,
in spite of the unkempt light hair

239
00:22:15.839 --> 00:22:21.680
and unshaven stubble of a beard.
It was like a masquerade of rank and

240
00:22:21.759 --> 00:22:26.839
culture in the rags of misery,
beseeming it as ill as an unsuitable part

241
00:22:26.880 --> 00:22:32.559
in a play. And the actor
sat motionless, staring into the fire hill,

242
00:22:32.599 --> 00:22:36.279
at ease in the atmosphere of luxury
which surrounded him. In this room,

243
00:22:36.920 --> 00:22:40.680
evidently the home of a young man
of fortune who had no yearnings for

244
00:22:40.759 --> 00:22:45.599
domestic society. The curtains and carpets
were of handsome quality, so were the

245
00:22:45.640 --> 00:22:52.079
furniture and ornaments, but arranged without
any reference to comfort. The chairs and

246
00:22:52.119 --> 00:22:56.279
tables against the wall, stiff and
orderly and shining with polish. But it

247
00:22:56.319 --> 00:23:00.680
did not make this impression on Bertie, for sense of the blessedness of warmth

248
00:23:00.680 --> 00:23:06.799
and shelter possessed him wholly of peace
and reprieve, as calm as a lake,

249
00:23:06.920 --> 00:23:11.680
and as delightful as an oasis,
a smiling prospect after the snow and

250
00:23:11.799 --> 00:23:15.599
cold of the last few hours.
And when he saw that Frank was gazing

251
00:23:15.640 --> 00:23:21.960
at him invisible wonder at his motionless
attitude by the glorious fire, where the

252
00:23:22.039 --> 00:23:26.880
dancing flames flew up like yellow dragon's
tongs, at last he smiled and said,

253
00:23:26.920 --> 00:23:30.920
with humble gratitude, in the tone
of a beggar, thank you very

254
00:23:32.000 --> 00:23:37.359
much. This is good. Annie
had not much to set before them,

255
00:23:37.720 --> 00:23:41.640
the remains from the larder of a
young fellow who lives chiefly away from home.

256
00:23:41.119 --> 00:23:45.559
A bit of cold beef, steak
and salad, some biscuits and jam.

257
00:23:45.720 --> 00:23:49.519
But it bore some resemblance to a
supper, and Bertie did it full

258
00:23:49.559 --> 00:23:56.400
honor, eating and drinking with systematic
deliberateness, hardly conscious of what, and

259
00:23:56.519 --> 00:24:02.319
imbibing hot grog without confessing the hunger
with which had nipped his very vitals.

260
00:24:03.200 --> 00:24:07.359
At length, Frank tried to make
him speak, drew him into talk and

261
00:24:07.440 --> 00:24:11.279
into telling him what had reduced him
to such misery. Bertie told his tale

262
00:24:11.319 --> 00:24:17.240
in a fragmentary fashion, very abjectly, every word sounding like a petition,

263
00:24:18.440 --> 00:24:22.079
disputes with his father about his mother's
fortune, a trifle of a few thousand

264
00:24:22.119 --> 00:24:27.799
golden quickly spent vicissitudes in America,
where he had been by turns a farm

265
00:24:27.880 --> 00:24:32.839
servant, a waiter in a hotel, and a super on the stage.

266
00:24:33.400 --> 00:24:37.480
His return to Europe on board a
liner, working out his passage in every

267
00:24:37.559 --> 00:24:44.200
variety of service. His first day
in London without assent, he remembered Vestova's

268
00:24:44.200 --> 00:24:48.720
address from letters bearing date of some
years back, and had at once made

269
00:24:48.720 --> 00:24:52.519
his way to White Rose Cottage,
only fearing that meanwhile Frank might have moved

270
00:24:52.559 --> 00:24:59.599
half a dozen times and left no
traces. Oh his anxiety that night,

271
00:25:00.119 --> 00:25:03.440
waiting in the cold wind, while
it grew darker and darker, the gloom,

272
00:25:03.720 --> 00:25:08.279
with no relief but the ghostly whiteness
of the deathly silent snow, and

273
00:25:08.359 --> 00:25:14.599
now the warmth, the shelter and
food. And again he thanked his friend,

274
00:25:14.880 --> 00:25:18.960
cowering, shriveled in his threadbare clothes, Thank you, thank you,

275
00:25:21.240 --> 00:25:25.119
Annie Sulky, over so much trouble
at this hour of the night, and

276
00:25:25.240 --> 00:25:29.880
for such a vagabond brought in from
the street, had nevertheless prepared a bedroom,

277
00:25:30.240 --> 00:25:34.680
and Frank led him upstairs, Shocked
by his exhausted appearance and ashy paleness.

278
00:25:36.839 --> 00:25:40.559
He patted him on the shoulder,
promising to help him, but now

279
00:25:40.599 --> 00:25:44.200
he must go to bed. Tomorrow
they would see what could be done.

280
00:25:45.200 --> 00:25:51.000
When Bertie found himself alone, he
looked about him. The room was very

281
00:25:51.000 --> 00:25:56.559
comfortable, the bed ample, soft
and warm. He felt himself squalid and

282
00:25:56.640 --> 00:26:00.640
dirty amidst such surroundings of luxury,
and, by an actatural instinct of decency

283
00:26:00.640 --> 00:26:06.640
and cleanliness, though his teeth were
chattering with cold, he first carefully and

284
00:26:06.720 --> 00:26:11.119
elaborately washed himself, lathering, rubbing, brushing, till his whole body was

285
00:26:11.240 --> 00:26:17.759
rosy and glowing and smelling of soap
SuDS. He looked in the glass and

286
00:26:17.880 --> 00:26:22.960
only regretted that he had no raisors. He would have shaved. At last,

287
00:26:22.079 --> 00:26:26.799
Having slipped on a night shirt which
lay ready for use, he crept

288
00:26:26.839 --> 00:26:32.559
in between the blankets. He did
not immediately fall asleep, reveling in the

289
00:26:32.599 --> 00:26:37.519
comfort, in his own purification,
in the whiteness of the sheets, the

290
00:26:37.559 --> 00:26:41.799
warmth of the quilt, in the
gleam of the night light, even which

291
00:26:41.839 --> 00:26:47.400
showed discreetly through a green shade.
A smile came into his eyes and parted

292
00:26:47.440 --> 00:26:52.400
his lips and he was asleep without
a thought of the morrow, happy in

293
00:26:52.440 --> 00:26:56.440
the respite of today and the warmth
of the bed, his mind almost vacant,

294
00:26:56.559 --> 00:27:02.799
indeed, but for the single recurring
thought that Frank was really a good

295
00:27:02.839 --> 00:27:11.759
fellow. Two next morning, there
was a hard frost, the snow glittered

296
00:27:11.839 --> 00:27:17.960
like crystals. They had breakfasted,
and Bertie was relating his disasters in America.

297
00:27:18.160 --> 00:27:22.960
He had been trimmed and shaved by
Frank's barber, and he was wearing

298
00:27:22.000 --> 00:27:26.839
Frank's clothes, which were a world
too wide for him, and a pair

299
00:27:26.880 --> 00:27:30.799
of slippers in which his feet were
lost. He already felt more at home

300
00:27:30.839 --> 00:27:34.640
and began to bask, like a
cat which has found a warm spot of

301
00:27:34.680 --> 00:27:41.559
sunshine. He lounged at his ease
in the armchair, smoking comfortably, and

302
00:27:41.720 --> 00:27:45.880
was on the old familiar terms with
Frank. His voice was soft and mellow,

303
00:27:47.000 --> 00:27:51.960
with a ring of full content,
like an alloy of gold. Vesthova

304
00:27:52.440 --> 00:27:56.119
was interested and let him tell his
story in his own way, and he

305
00:27:56.200 --> 00:28:00.319
did so very simply, without making
any secret of his poverty. But everything

306
00:28:00.319 --> 00:28:06.599
had happened inevitably and could not have
turned out otherwise. He was no favorite

307
00:28:06.599 --> 00:28:11.680
of fortune. That was all,
but he was tough. Many another would

308
00:28:11.759 --> 00:28:15.279
not have pulled through as he had. Frank looked at him in astonishment.

309
00:28:15.920 --> 00:28:21.319
He was so frail, so pale, so delicate, almost devoid of all

310
00:28:21.400 --> 00:28:26.839
manly developments. He was lost in
the grotesque amplitude of Frank's coat and trousers,

311
00:28:27.440 --> 00:28:33.359
a mere stripling as compared with his
own stalwart's angular frame. And he

312
00:28:33.400 --> 00:28:37.000
had gone through days of hunger,
nights without a shelter, a depth of

313
00:28:37.039 --> 00:28:42.559
poverty which to Frank, well fed
and ruddy with vigorous health, seemed unendurable,

314
00:28:44.720 --> 00:28:48.359
had he spoke of it so coolly, almost jestingly, without complaining,

315
00:28:48.799 --> 00:28:53.319
only looking with regretful pity at his
hands, which were thin and blue with

316
00:28:53.359 --> 00:28:59.960
the biting cold, and chapped and
raw about the knuckles. At the moment,

317
00:29:00.359 --> 00:29:03.240
the state of his hands seemed to
be the only thing that troubled him.

318
00:29:03.440 --> 00:29:07.039
A very happy nature, thought Frank, while he laughed at him for

319
00:29:07.119 --> 00:29:14.039
his concern about his hands. But
Bertie himself was shocked at his own heedlessness,

320
00:29:14.359 --> 00:29:18.440
for he suddenly exclaimed, but what
am I to do? What am

321
00:29:18.440 --> 00:29:23.400
I to do? He gazed into
vacancy, helpless and desperate, wringing his

322
00:29:23.519 --> 00:29:29.519
hands, Frank laughed him out of
his despair, poured him out a glass

323
00:29:29.559 --> 00:29:33.000
of sherry, and told him that
for the present he must stay where he

324
00:29:33.200 --> 00:29:37.559
was to recover. He himself would
be heartily glad of Bertie's company for a

325
00:29:37.599 --> 00:29:42.759
few weeks. He was a little
sick of his wealthy bachelor life. He

326
00:29:42.839 --> 00:29:47.839
belonged to a circle of idlers who
went out a great deal and spent a

327
00:29:47.839 --> 00:29:51.720
great deal, and he was tired
of it. All dinners and balls in

328
00:29:51.759 --> 00:29:56.920
the world as suppers and orgies in
the half world. It was always the

329
00:29:56.960 --> 00:30:02.519
same thing, a life like a
montaignourus down and then up again, down

330
00:30:02.559 --> 00:30:07.240
and then up again, without a
moment for thought, an existence made for

331
00:30:07.279 --> 00:30:11.880
you in the position you made for
yourself. At the moment, he had

332
00:30:11.920 --> 00:30:17.920
but one anxiety, Bertie himself.
Frank would help him after a few weeks

333
00:30:18.000 --> 00:30:22.599
rest to find an appointment or some
employment, but above all he was not

334
00:30:22.640 --> 00:30:27.319
to worry himself. For the present. Vestova was only glad to have his

335
00:30:27.400 --> 00:30:33.240
old friend. Under his roof,
memories rose up before him like dissolving views,

336
00:30:33.279 --> 00:30:37.799
pale hued and swift, but appealing
to his sympathy. Memories of his

337
00:30:37.920 --> 00:30:44.519
school days, of boyish mischief,
zigzag excursions, picnics among the sand hills

338
00:30:44.599 --> 00:30:49.319
near the Hague. Did Bertie remember? Frank could see him still, the

339
00:30:49.440 --> 00:30:55.480
slight, fragile lad, bullied by
louts, protected by himself, Frank,

340
00:30:55.920 --> 00:31:00.119
whose fists were always ready to hit
out right and left in defense of his

341
00:31:00.279 --> 00:31:07.640
friend, and later, on their
student days in Delft, Bertie's sudden disappearance

342
00:31:07.680 --> 00:31:12.200
without leaving a trace even for Frank. Then a few letters at rare intervals,

343
00:31:12.720 --> 00:31:18.400
and then years of silence. Oh, he was glad, indeed to

344
00:31:18.440 --> 00:31:22.440
see his friend at his side once
more. He had always had a great

345
00:31:22.519 --> 00:31:26.920
love for Bertie, just because Bertie
was so wholly unlike himself, with something

346
00:31:26.920 --> 00:31:32.000
of the cat about him, loving
to be petted and made much of but

347
00:31:32.119 --> 00:31:37.119
now and then irresistibly prompts it to
flee over roofs and gutters, to get

348
00:31:37.240 --> 00:31:41.680
myery and dirty, and return at
last to warm and clean himself on the

349
00:31:41.759 --> 00:31:47.640
hearth. Frank loved his friend as
a twin brother, quite different from himself,

350
00:31:48.160 --> 00:31:55.559
imposed upon by Bertie's supercilious and delicately
egoistic fascination, a catslike creature altogether,

351
00:31:56.640 --> 00:32:00.839
Bertie found it a great luxury to
stay in door the whole of that

352
00:32:00.000 --> 00:32:06.359
day sitting by the fire, which
he kept blazing by feeding it with logs.

353
00:32:06.880 --> 00:32:09.880
Frank had some capital port, and
they sat after lunch sipping it,

354
00:32:10.400 --> 00:32:15.160
dreaming or talking, Bertie telling a
hundred tales of his adventures in America,

355
00:32:15.599 --> 00:32:20.559
of his farmer, master, of
his hotel, and the theater where he

356
00:32:20.599 --> 00:32:24.160
had acted, and one anecdote led
to another, all garnished with a touch

357
00:32:24.200 --> 00:32:30.920
of singular romance. Frank presently wanted
a little fresh air and said he would

358
00:32:30.960 --> 00:32:35.759
go to his club, but Bertie
remained where he was. He could not

359
00:32:35.960 --> 00:32:38.920
go about in rags, but he
could not appear anywhere with Frank in the

360
00:32:38.920 --> 00:32:44.400
clothes he had on. Frank was
to return to dinner at eight o'clock,

361
00:32:45.000 --> 00:32:47.519
and then, suddenly, as if
it had come to him like a lightning

362
00:32:47.559 --> 00:32:52.839
flash, Bertie said, say nothing
about me. Pray to any of your

363
00:32:52.880 --> 00:32:55.480
friends. They need not be told
that you know such a bad lot as

364
00:32:55.559 --> 00:33:01.599
I am. Promise me, Frank
promised, laughing and holding out his hand.

365
00:33:02.279 --> 00:33:07.240
The bad lot added, how can
I ever repay you? What a

366
00:33:07.279 --> 00:33:09.680
happy thing for me that I should
have met you. You're the most generous

367
00:33:09.680 --> 00:33:15.440
fellow I ever knew. Frank escaped
from this volley of gratitude, and Bertie

368
00:33:15.480 --> 00:33:20.480
remained alone in front of the hearth, toasting all over in the blaze,

369
00:33:20.680 --> 00:33:25.359
or stretching his legs with his feet
on the shining bars. He poured himself

370
00:33:25.400 --> 00:33:30.240
out another glass of port and made
himself think of nothing, reveling in the

371
00:33:30.359 --> 00:33:37.279
enjoyment of idleness, while he seriously
examined his damaged hands, wondering how best

372
00:33:37.359 --> 00:33:45.839
to ensure their rapid recovery. Three
Bertie had been a month at white Rose

373
00:33:45.920 --> 00:33:51.480
Cottage and was now hardly recognizable in
the young man who sat by Frank's side

374
00:33:51.839 --> 00:33:57.960
in a Victoria in an irreproachable fur
lined coat a fashionable tall hat, both

375
00:33:58.000 --> 00:34:01.799
the men wrapped about the knees in
a hands plaid. He now mixed quite

376
00:34:01.880 --> 00:34:07.360
at his ease with Frank's other acquaintances, carefully dressed, agreeable and entertaining,

377
00:34:07.760 --> 00:34:14.880
and lisping English with an affected accent
which he thought elegant. He dined with

378
00:34:14.960 --> 00:34:20.000
Frank every day at the club to
which he was introduced, criticized game and

379
00:34:20.079 --> 00:34:23.559
wines with the most blase air in
the world, and smoked havannahs at two

380
00:34:23.559 --> 00:34:30.519
shillings apiece as if they were mere
straw. Frank had in his inmost soul

381
00:34:30.840 --> 00:34:35.440
the greatest belief in him, and
watched him with a smile of secret satisfaction

382
00:34:35.920 --> 00:34:38.320
as he calmly went his own way, chatting with men of the world,

383
00:34:38.719 --> 00:34:45.719
without ever for a moment's feeling shy. And Frank thought the comedy altogether so

384
00:34:45.880 --> 00:34:52.239
amusing that he introduced his friend wherever
he went. Winter yielded to a foggy

385
00:34:52.280 --> 00:34:58.119
spring. The London season was upon
them, and a Bertie seemed to find

386
00:34:58.199 --> 00:35:02.239
great pleasure in assisting at after noon
teas and evenings at home, in sitting

387
00:35:02.280 --> 00:35:07.639
at a grand dinner between two pairs
of fine shoulders, and flirting with each

388
00:35:07.679 --> 00:35:12.800
in turn, never dazzled by the
glitter of jewels, nor bewildered by the

389
00:35:12.840 --> 00:35:17.679
sparkle of champagne, in leaning with
languid grace in the stalls or dress circles,

390
00:35:19.199 --> 00:35:23.960
his chiseled features full of distinction and
lordly repose, a fragrant white flower

391
00:35:24.039 --> 00:35:30.480
gleaming in his buttonhole, and his
opera glass dangling between his now white fingers,

392
00:35:30.920 --> 00:35:35.559
as though not one of the ladies
was worthy of his inspection. Frank

393
00:35:35.960 --> 00:35:39.000
for lack of occupation as a man
who takes his pleasure where he finds it.

394
00:35:39.440 --> 00:35:44.199
Had pushed Bertie forward in the world, not merely to help him,

395
00:35:44.360 --> 00:35:47.199
but also for the fun of it, a silly amusement, to make a

396
00:35:47.239 --> 00:35:52.800
fool of society. Bertie himself had
many scruples, had kept a note in

397
00:35:52.840 --> 00:35:58.599
a pocket book of everything Frank spent
upon him. When times were better,

398
00:35:58.639 --> 00:36:01.639
he would repay him all, and
in a fortnight it had mounted up to

399
00:36:01.679 --> 00:36:07.079
a total of some hundred pounds.
Even at home, Frank found him amusing

400
00:36:08.519 --> 00:36:13.280
Bertie, who had contrived, by
a few kind words, to win the

401
00:36:13.320 --> 00:36:17.519
good graces of Annie and her husband. Vestova's valet and butler, turned all

402
00:36:17.519 --> 00:36:23.519
the furniture about in whimsical disorder,
bought statuettes, palms, and oriental stuffs,

403
00:36:23.880 --> 00:36:29.239
and changed the unsociable aspects of the
room into one of artistic comfort,

404
00:36:29.679 --> 00:36:36.400
which invited to indolence as subdued lights, wide divans, the atmosphere of an

405
00:36:36.400 --> 00:36:43.239
alcove redolent of Egyptian pastels and fine
cigarettes, in which thought floated into dreams,

406
00:36:43.719 --> 00:36:47.679
and the half closed eyes rested on
the nude figures of bronze nymphs seen

407
00:36:47.760 --> 00:36:54.079
through the greenery of plants. Here
in the evening high festivals were held orgies

408
00:36:54.199 --> 00:37:00.920
with a few chosen friends and select
fair ones, two ladies from skating rink,

409
00:37:00.960 --> 00:37:05.719
and a figurance from a theater,
who smoked cigarettes with their vermilion lips

410
00:37:06.079 --> 00:37:10.320
and drank to Bertie's health. Frank
left, to his heart's content to see

411
00:37:10.360 --> 00:37:16.159
Bertie, a contemner of the fair
sex, quite insensible to the three charmers,

412
00:37:16.199 --> 00:37:21.360
making game of them, teasing them, setting them by the ears till

413
00:37:21.360 --> 00:37:24.119
they were almost ready to claw each
other, and to conclude the matter,

414
00:37:24.519 --> 00:37:31.159
pouring floods of champagne down their des
collite throats. No, Frank had never

415
00:37:31.199 --> 00:37:36.159
been so well amused during all his
long residence in London, where he had

416
00:37:36.159 --> 00:37:39.719
settled as an engineer in order to
give, as he said, a cosmopolitan

417
00:37:39.800 --> 00:37:45.920
character to his knowledge of the world. He was thoroughly good hearted and too

418
00:37:45.039 --> 00:37:51.119
highly prosperous to be a deep thinker. He had tasted of every pleasure and

419
00:37:51.239 --> 00:37:54.079
had no high opinion of life,
which was after all but a farce,

420
00:37:54.800 --> 00:38:01.840
lasting according to statistics on average six
and thirty years. He made small pretense

421
00:38:01.880 --> 00:38:07.159
of any philosophical views of existence,
beyond a determined avoidance of everything that was

422
00:38:07.239 --> 00:38:13.679
not amusing. Now Bertie was very
amusing, not only in his fun with

423
00:38:13.760 --> 00:38:17.519
women, the cruel sport of a
panther, but especially in the farcical parts

424
00:38:17.599 --> 00:38:22.159
he played in Frank's world, where
he figured as a man of fashion,

425
00:38:22.679 --> 00:38:27.360
he a vagabond who only a month
since had stood shivering in rags on the

426
00:38:27.400 --> 00:38:32.360
pavements. It was a constant secret
delight to his friend, who gave Bertie

427
00:38:32.440 --> 00:38:37.880
carte blanche to enable him to keep
it up, a carte blanche which was

428
00:38:37.920 --> 00:38:44.119
amply honored, bringing in heavy tailor's
bills for Bertie, dressed with refined vanity,

429
00:38:44.559 --> 00:38:49.039
bought ties by the dozen, adopted
every fancy that came into fashion,

430
00:38:49.360 --> 00:38:53.159
has scented himself with all the waters
of Rimmel. It was as though he

431
00:38:53.280 --> 00:39:00.480
was fain to plunge into every extravagant
refinement of an exquisite after having been a

432
00:39:00.519 --> 00:39:06.159
squalid scarecrow. And although at first
he kept faithful record of his outlay,

433
00:39:06.519 --> 00:39:10.159
he soon forgot first one item,
and then another, till at last he

434
00:39:10.239 --> 00:39:17.199
forgot all. Thus weeks slipped by, and Frank never thought of troubling himself

435
00:39:17.239 --> 00:39:23.960
to inquire among his influential acquaintances for
employment for his companion. Their life as

436
00:39:24.000 --> 00:39:30.760
wealthy idlers filled their minds entirely.
Frank's at any rate, for Bertie had

437
00:39:30.760 --> 00:39:37.039
brought a new charm into it.
But suddenly a strange thing happened. One

438
00:39:37.119 --> 00:39:40.559
day Bertie went out in the morning
alone and did not come in to lunch.

439
00:39:42.679 --> 00:39:45.559
After luncheon at the club, no
Bertie, nor yet at dinner,

440
00:39:46.559 --> 00:39:51.920
he did not come home in the
evening. He had left no clue.

441
00:39:52.280 --> 00:39:59.000
Frank, extremely uneasy, sat up
half the night no one. Two days

442
00:39:59.039 --> 00:40:04.800
went by still no one. Frank
inquired right and left, and at last

443
00:40:04.880 --> 00:40:09.000
gave information to the police. At
last. One morning, before Frank was

444
00:40:09.079 --> 00:40:15.639
up, Bertie appeared at his bedside
with an apologetic smile. Frank must not

445
00:40:15.800 --> 00:40:19.840
be angry with him. He surely
had not been alarmed. You see,

446
00:40:20.119 --> 00:40:24.199
such a monotonously genteel life had suddenly
been too much for him. Always these

447
00:40:24.280 --> 00:40:30.360
elegant ladies with trains and diamonds,
always clubs full of lords and baronets,

448
00:40:30.800 --> 00:40:36.559
and skating rinks, the pink of
finery, always a chimney pot's hat,

449
00:40:36.920 --> 00:40:43.079
and every evening full dress with the
regulation buttonholer. It was intolerable. He

450
00:40:43.119 --> 00:40:46.840
could endure it no longer it had
been too much for him. But where

451
00:40:46.880 --> 00:40:52.440
did you hide yourself, asked Frank
in utter amazements. Oh here and there

452
00:40:52.840 --> 00:40:58.239
among old acquaintance. I've not been
out of London, and you did not

453
00:40:58.400 --> 00:41:02.559
know a soul here. Oh well, no fashionable folk like your friends.

454
00:41:04.000 --> 00:41:07.800
But escape grace or two, you're
not vexed with me. Frank had sat

455
00:41:07.880 --> 00:41:12.320
up in bed to talk to him. He saw that he looked pale,

456
00:41:12.639 --> 00:41:16.960
weary, and unkempt. His trousers
were deeply bordered with mud, his hat

457
00:41:17.159 --> 00:41:22.880
crushed. There was a three cornered
rent in his greatcoat. And he stood

458
00:41:22.920 --> 00:41:27.800
there in evident confusion, like a
boy with his doubting, coaxing smile.

459
00:41:29.000 --> 00:41:31.960
Come, do not be cross with
me, Take me into favor once more.

460
00:41:34.039 --> 00:41:37.760
This was too much for Frank,
Provoked beyond the measure, he exclaimed,

461
00:41:38.480 --> 00:41:43.360
But Bertie, what a cat you
look? And where on earth have

462
00:41:43.440 --> 00:41:47.079
you been? He asked again?
Oh? Here and there? And he

463
00:41:47.119 --> 00:41:52.000
could get no more out of him. Bertie would only say that he had

464
00:41:52.000 --> 00:41:55.239
wanted to disappear, and now he
was tired he would go to bed.

465
00:41:57.320 --> 00:42:01.480
He slept till three in the afternoon. Frank laughed over it all day and

466
00:42:01.599 --> 00:42:07.360
Bertie went into fits when he heard
of the police. At dinner at the

467
00:42:07.400 --> 00:42:10.679
club, he related with a melancholy
face that he had been out of town

468
00:42:10.719 --> 00:42:15.679
for a few days attending a funeral. Frank had failed to receive a note

469
00:42:15.760 --> 00:42:21.519
through the carelessness of a servant.
But where in the world have you really

470
00:42:21.559 --> 00:42:27.840
been? Whispered Frank for the third
time, infinitely amused and inquisitive, here

471
00:42:27.920 --> 00:42:30.559
and there, I tell you,
first in one place and then in another,

472
00:42:31.039 --> 00:42:37.360
answered Bertie, with the most innocent
face in the world, and dapper

473
00:42:37.440 --> 00:42:42.679
as ever. He delicately lifted an
oyster his little finger in the air and

474
00:42:42.840 --> 00:42:52.119
swallowed down his half dozen without another
word on the subject. Four the season

475
00:42:52.199 --> 00:42:58.039
passed away, but Bertie remained sometimes. Indeed, he talked of going to

476
00:42:58.119 --> 00:43:02.800
Holland. He had an uncle,
a stockbroker in Amsterdam, possibly that uncle,

477
00:43:04.440 --> 00:43:07.480
but Vestova would not hear of it, and when his friend's conscience pricked

478
00:43:07.519 --> 00:43:13.119
him for sponging on him, he
talked him down. What did it matter.

479
00:43:13.519 --> 00:43:16.119
If Bertie had been the rich man
and he the pauper, Bertie would

480
00:43:16.119 --> 00:43:22.039
have done the same by him.
They were friends. A true appreciation of

481
00:43:22.079 --> 00:43:27.280
the case began to dawn on him. In the now firmly established habits of

482
00:43:27.360 --> 00:43:34.360
their life. Frank's moral sense whispered
drowsily in the ease of their luxurious existence.

483
00:43:35.639 --> 00:43:38.239
Now and then. Indeed, he
had something like a vague suspicion that

484
00:43:38.320 --> 00:43:42.760
he was not rich enough for two, that he had spent more in the

485
00:43:42.800 --> 00:43:46.400
last few months than in any former
season. But he was too heedless to

486
00:43:46.480 --> 00:43:52.519
dwell long on such unpleasant doubts.
He was lulled to sleep by Bertie,

487
00:43:52.719 --> 00:43:58.239
as if by opium or morphia.
Bertie had become indispensable to him. He

488
00:43:58.320 --> 00:44:01.639
consulted his friend on every part,
and allowed himself to be led by him

489
00:44:01.679 --> 00:44:07.320
on every occasion, completely subjugated by
the ascendancy held over him by the fragile

490
00:44:07.360 --> 00:44:12.639
little man with his velvet paws,
as though he had him under a yoke.

491
00:44:13.880 --> 00:44:16.800
Every now and then, a longest
frequent intervals of about a fortnight,

492
00:44:17.320 --> 00:44:22.400
Bertie disappeared, stayed away four or
five days, and came back one fine

493
00:44:22.440 --> 00:44:30.159
morning with his insinuating smile, exhausted, pale, and tired out. These

494
00:44:30.199 --> 00:44:37.000
were perhaps some secret excesses of dissipation
mysterious adventure hunting in the sordid Purlieus of

495
00:44:37.039 --> 00:44:42.800
the lowest neighbourhoods of which Frank never
heard nor understood the truth, a depth

496
00:44:42.840 --> 00:44:47.639
of depravity into which Frank seemed too
precise and dainty to be initiated, sins

497
00:44:47.679 --> 00:44:52.000
in which he was to have no
part, at which Bertie, in his

498
00:44:52.159 --> 00:44:58.880
refinement of selfishness, kept for himself
as an occasional treat. Then Frank's hours

499
00:44:58.880 --> 00:45:04.639
were passed in disgusting of life.
He missed the unwholesome stimulants of his existence.

500
00:45:05.880 --> 00:45:09.719
In his solitude, he sank into
gray, melancholy and sadness, verging

501
00:45:09.800 --> 00:45:15.039
on despair. He stayed at home
all day, incapable of any exertion,

502
00:45:15.639 --> 00:45:21.920
sulking in his lonely house, where
everything, the draping of the handsome curtains,

503
00:45:22.320 --> 00:45:25.719
the bronze nudity of the statues,
the careless disarray of the cushions on

504
00:45:25.760 --> 00:45:30.960
the divan had still, as it
were, an odor of Bertie, which

505
00:45:30.000 --> 00:45:36.400
haunted him with regret. On such
days as these, he was conscious of

506
00:45:36.440 --> 00:45:42.480
the futility of his existence, the
odious insignificance of his sinulous, empty life,

507
00:45:43.000 --> 00:45:47.440
useless, aimless, null Sadly,
sweet memories would come over him,

508
00:45:47.800 --> 00:45:53.440
reminiscences of his parental home, shining
through the magic glass of retrospect, like

509
00:45:53.519 --> 00:45:59.400
bright still pools of tender domestic harmony, in which the figures of his father

510
00:45:59.480 --> 00:46:05.719
and mother stood forth, grand and
noble, glorified by childlike affection. He

511
00:46:05.840 --> 00:46:10.239
longed for some unspeakable ideal, something
pure and chaste, some high aim in

512
00:46:10.320 --> 00:46:15.280
life. He would shake off this
torpor of the soul. He would send

513
00:46:15.280 --> 00:46:22.760
away Bertie. But Bertie came back, and Bertie held him tightly once more

514
00:46:22.800 --> 00:46:28.719
in his silken bonds, and he
saw more clearly every day that he could

515
00:46:28.800 --> 00:46:34.079
not live without Bertie. And then, catching sight of himself in a mirror,

516
00:46:34.480 --> 00:46:38.519
tall and brawny and strong, the
healthy blood tinging his clear complexion,

517
00:46:39.519 --> 00:46:45.360
he could not forbear smiling at the
foolish visions of his solitude, which struck

518
00:46:45.440 --> 00:46:50.239
him now as diseased imaginings, quite
out of keeping with his robust vigor.

519
00:46:51.360 --> 00:46:53.880
Life was but a farce, and
the better part was to play it out

520
00:46:53.920 --> 00:47:00.320
as a farce, in a mere
sensual enjoyment. Nothing else was worth the

521
00:47:00.360 --> 00:47:05.639
pains. And yet sometimes at night, when his big body lay tired out

522
00:47:05.679 --> 00:47:10.000
after some riotous evening, a gnawing
dissatisfaction would come over him, not to

523
00:47:10.000 --> 00:47:15.920
be conquered by this light hearted philosophy, and even Bertie himself would lecture him.

524
00:47:16.400 --> 00:47:22.119
Why did not Frank seek some employment, some sphere of action. Why

525
00:47:22.159 --> 00:47:25.960
did he not travel for a while? Why not go to Norway? Asked

526
00:47:25.960 --> 00:47:31.079
Bertie one day for the sake of
saying something. London was beginning to be

527
00:47:31.119 --> 00:47:37.159
intolerable to Bertie, and as the
notion of traveling smiled on Frank, both

528
00:47:37.159 --> 00:47:39.960
for a change and for economy,
since they could live more cheaply abroad than

529
00:47:40.000 --> 00:47:45.320
in the whorld of fashionable London.
He thought it over had came to a

530
00:47:45.400 --> 00:47:50.519
decision to leave white Rose Cottage for
an indefinite period to the care of Annie

531
00:47:50.519 --> 00:47:54.559
and her husband, and spend a
few weeks in Norway. Bertie should go

532
00:47:54.639 --> 00:48:07.440
with him. End of Section one, Section two of Footsteps of Fate by

533
00:48:07.559 --> 00:48:17.239
Luis Kuperos. This LibriVox recording is
in the public domain. Part two one.

534
00:48:17.360 --> 00:48:22.679
After luncheon at the table dote of
the Britannia Hotel at Torontier, the

535
00:48:22.760 --> 00:48:27.639
friends made their way along the broad
quiet streets with their low wooden houses,

536
00:48:28.400 --> 00:48:31.760
and they had left the town,
going in the direction of the Yettrielt when

537
00:48:31.800 --> 00:48:37.360
they overtook in the village of Eileen, an elderly gentleman with a young girl,

538
00:48:37.840 --> 00:48:42.760
evidently bent on the same excursion.
The pair had sat a few places

539
00:48:42.800 --> 00:48:46.599
off at the table dote, and
as this much acquaintance justified a recognition in

540
00:48:46.679 --> 00:48:52.440
so lonely a spot, Vestova and
his friend lifted their hats. The old

541
00:48:52.480 --> 00:48:59.719
gentleman immediately asked in English whether they
knew the road to the yitfrielt He and

542
00:48:59.760 --> 00:49:04.400
his daughter, who during the colloquy
never looked up from her Badeka, could

543
00:49:04.400 --> 00:49:08.280
not agree on the subject. This
difference of opinion led to a conversation.

544
00:49:09.519 --> 00:49:14.159
The two young men begged to be
allowed to join them, Frank being of

545
00:49:14.199 --> 00:49:20.199
the opinion that Baedeker was right.
Papa will never believe in Badeker, said

546
00:49:20.199 --> 00:49:23.119
the young lady with a quiet smile, as she closed the red volume she

547
00:49:23.159 --> 00:49:28.320
had been consulting. Nor will he
ever trust me when I tell him I

548
00:49:28.320 --> 00:49:31.679
will guide him safely? Are you
always so sure of knowing your way?

549
00:49:32.199 --> 00:49:38.000
Said Frank, laughing always she saw, soily, declared with a gay laugh.

550
00:49:39.079 --> 00:49:43.800
Bertie inquired how long a walk it
was and what was to be seen

551
00:49:43.840 --> 00:49:47.880
at the end of it. Frank's
everlasting walks were a weariness and a bore.

552
00:49:50.039 --> 00:49:53.599
During his residence with his friend,
he had so spoilt himself in order

553
00:49:53.639 --> 00:49:59.039
to forget his former wretchedness, that
he now knew no greater pleasure than that

554
00:49:59.159 --> 00:50:01.280
of lying on a bed bench with
a cigar or a glass of port,

555
00:50:02.079 --> 00:50:07.239
and above all would avoid every exertion. But now abroad, when a man

556
00:50:07.360 --> 00:50:14.199
is traveling, he cannot forever sit
dozing in his hotel. Besides, he

557
00:50:14.360 --> 00:50:20.000
was quite stiff with riding in a
carryall. All this useless rushing about was

558
00:50:20.119 --> 00:50:23.599
really monstrous folly, and White Rose
Cottage was not such a bad place.

559
00:50:24.880 --> 00:50:30.440
Frank, on the contrary, thoroughly
enjoyed the clear, invigorating air of this

560
00:50:30.559 --> 00:50:34.519
brilliant summer day, and he drank
in the sunshine as though it were a

561
00:50:34.599 --> 00:50:40.239
fine wine cooled by a fresh mountain
breeze. His step was elastic, and

562
00:50:40.360 --> 00:50:45.800
his voice had a contented ring.
Are you an Englishman? Asked the gentleman.

563
00:50:46.840 --> 00:50:52.079
Vestova explained that they were Dutch,
that they lived in London, and

564
00:50:52.199 --> 00:50:58.000
his tone had the frank briskness which
a man instinctively adopts to fellow travelers as

565
00:50:58.079 --> 00:51:01.840
sharing his lot for the moment when
the weather is fine and the landscape pleasing,

566
00:51:04.159 --> 00:51:08.159
their sympathy being thus aroused by their
admiration of Norwegian scenery, they walked

567
00:51:08.199 --> 00:51:14.360
on side by side, the elder
man stepping out bravely, the young lady

568
00:51:14.480 --> 00:51:17.840
very erect, with her fine figure
molded in a simple, close fitting blue

569
00:51:17.840 --> 00:51:22.920
cloth dress, to which a cape
with several folds, something like an elegant

570
00:51:22.960 --> 00:51:29.519
type of coachman's cape, lent a
dash of smartness. She wore a sort

571
00:51:29.519 --> 00:51:34.280
of jockey cap with a Mannish air
on her thick twists of ruddy gold hair.

572
00:51:35.599 --> 00:51:38.800
Bertie alone could not understand how all
this could be called pleasure, but

573
00:51:39.000 --> 00:51:45.280
he made no complaint. He spoke
little, not thinking it necessary to make

574
00:51:45.360 --> 00:51:50.159
himself agreeable to people whom he might
probably never set eyes on again after the

575
00:51:50.199 --> 00:51:54.360
morrow, so he just kept up
with them, wondering at Frank, who

576
00:51:54.440 --> 00:52:00.679
had at once plunged into eager conversation
with the young lady, but perceiving on

577
00:52:00.719 --> 00:52:06.599
a sudden that his own politeness and
tact were a mere superficial varnish as compared

578
00:52:06.679 --> 00:52:14.039
with Frank's instinctive good breeding at that
moment for the first time, notwithstanding his

579
00:52:14.159 --> 00:52:19.519
better features, and natty traveling costume. He felt himself so far Frank's inferior

580
00:52:19.880 --> 00:52:24.719
as a surge of fury resembling hate
thrilled through him. He could not bear

581
00:52:24.800 --> 00:52:30.599
this sense of inferiority, so he
approached the old gentleman, and, walking

582
00:52:30.639 --> 00:52:36.559
by his side, forced himself to
a show of respectful amiability. As they

583
00:52:36.639 --> 00:52:40.679
followed the windings of the upward and
diminishing path, they by degrees lagged behind

584
00:52:40.800 --> 00:52:46.320
Frank and his companion, and thus
climbed the hill two and two. So

585
00:52:46.440 --> 00:52:50.960
you live in London? What is
your name? Asked the young lady,

586
00:52:51.320 --> 00:52:57.880
with calm curiosity. Frank Vestova.
My name is Eva Rhodes. My father

587
00:52:58.000 --> 00:53:02.159
is Sir Archibal Roads of Roads grow. And your friend his name is Robert

588
00:53:02.280 --> 00:53:07.719
van Meren. I like the sound
of your name best. I believe I

589
00:53:07.760 --> 00:53:12.800
can say it like English. Tell
it me again. He repeated his name,

590
00:53:12.960 --> 00:53:16.199
and she said it after him with
her English accent. It was very

591
00:53:16.199 --> 00:53:22.360
funny, and they laughed over it. Frank Frank Westhoover, and they looked

592
00:53:22.400 --> 00:53:29.119
back. Papa, are you tired? Cried Eva. The old man was

593
00:53:29.199 --> 00:53:34.239
toiling up the height with his broad
shoulders bent. His face was red under

594
00:53:34.239 --> 00:53:37.159
his traveling cap, which he had
pushed to the back of his head,

595
00:53:37.519 --> 00:53:42.840
and he was blowing like a triton. Bertie tried to smile pleasantly, though

596
00:53:42.880 --> 00:53:47.800
he was inwardly raging in high dudgeon
over this senseless clamber. They had half

597
00:53:47.800 --> 00:53:52.639
an hour more of it, however, before the narrow track, which zigzagged

598
00:53:52.719 --> 00:53:55.920
up the hillside like a gray Arabesque, came to an end, and they

599
00:53:55.920 --> 00:54:01.320
sat down to rest on a block
of stone. Eva was enchanted. Far

600
00:54:01.400 --> 00:54:07.400
below lay Drontime, with its modern
houses, encircled by the steely waters of

601
00:54:07.440 --> 00:54:12.000
the Knee, and its fiord,
a magic mirror on which floated the white

602
00:54:12.119 --> 00:54:17.079
mass of the fortress of Munkenholm.
The mountains rising on all sides were blue.

603
00:54:17.719 --> 00:54:22.039
Nearest to them, the bloomy purple
blue of the grape, then the

604
00:54:22.119 --> 00:54:28.559
deep sheeny blue of velvet, further
off, the transparent crystalline blue of the

605
00:54:28.599 --> 00:54:34.079
sapphire, and in the distance the
tender sky blue of the turquoise. The

606
00:54:34.159 --> 00:54:38.239
water was blue like blue silver.
The very air was blue as pearls are,

607
00:54:38.559 --> 00:54:45.000
or mother of pearls. The equable
sunlight fell on everything without glare and

608
00:54:45.079 --> 00:54:52.119
without shadow, from exactly overhead It's
almost like Italy, exclaimed Eva. And

609
00:54:52.280 --> 00:54:55.800
this is Norway. I had always
pictured Norway to myself as being all like

610
00:54:55.960 --> 00:55:00.920
rum Style, wild and barren,
with rocky peaks like rob Style Horn and

611
00:55:00.960 --> 00:55:07.320
the troll Tinder, and with raging
cascades like the slatter Hoss. But this

612
00:55:07.480 --> 00:55:10.800
is quite lovely and so softly blue. I should like to build a house

613
00:55:10.840 --> 00:55:15.239
here and live in it. That
I would call its Eva's Bower, and

614
00:55:15.400 --> 00:55:19.880
keep a whole flock of white doves. They would look so pretty flying in

615
00:55:19.920 --> 00:55:24.599
the blue air, dear child,
laughed Sir Archibald. It looks very different

616
00:55:24.639 --> 00:55:30.039
in winter, I suspect, no
doubt, different, but still lovely.

617
00:55:30.880 --> 00:55:35.360
In winter. I should love the
fury of raging winds and the roar of

618
00:55:35.440 --> 00:55:39.199
the waves of the fjord below my
house, and gray mists would hang over

619
00:55:39.199 --> 00:55:45.480
the hills. I can see it
all. Why you would be frozen,

620
00:55:45.039 --> 00:55:51.159
argued the father gravely. Oh no, and I should sit at my turret

621
00:55:51.280 --> 00:55:57.280
window dreaming over Dante or Spencer.
Do you love Dante and Spencer? The

622
00:55:57.360 --> 00:56:01.239
question was addressed to Frank, who
had listened and somewhat puzzled to Eva's raptures

623
00:56:01.679 --> 00:56:06.920
and was now a little startled.
For you see, though he knew Dante

624
00:56:06.920 --> 00:56:09.840
by name, he had never even
heard of the poet Spencer, only of

625
00:56:09.880 --> 00:56:15.440
Herbert Spencer. What you do not
know the fairy Queen Yuna, and the

626
00:56:15.559 --> 00:56:22.840
Red Cross Knight and britom Art.
How very strange, dear child. What

627
00:56:22.960 --> 00:56:28.000
a little fanatic you are over those
silly allegories, said Papa. But they

628
00:56:28.000 --> 00:56:34.480
are glorious, Papa, Eva insisted, Besides, I love allegory above all

629
00:56:34.480 --> 00:56:39.159
things, and admire no other kind
of poetry. The style is so affected,

630
00:56:39.559 --> 00:56:45.239
you are drowned in symbolism. It
is the keynote of the Renaissance.

631
00:56:45.679 --> 00:56:51.280
Eva protested. In the time of
Elizabeth all the court talked in that high

632
00:56:51.320 --> 00:56:57.360
flown style, and Edmund Spencer's images
are splendid. They sparkle like jewels.

633
00:56:58.639 --> 00:57:02.639
Bertie thought this disco much to learnard, but he kept his opinion to himself,

634
00:57:02.840 --> 00:57:08.079
and made some remark about Dante's inferno. They were by this time rested,

635
00:57:08.480 --> 00:57:14.159
and went on again up the hill. My daughter is half an aesthetic,

636
00:57:14.639 --> 00:57:19.559
said the old gentleman, laughing,
and Evil laughed too. Nay,

637
00:57:19.960 --> 00:57:22.000
that is not the truth, Papa, Do not believe him, mister,

638
00:57:22.599 --> 00:57:28.239
mister Westhoover. Do you know what
makes Papa say so? A few years

639
00:57:28.280 --> 00:57:30.960
ago, when I had but just
left school, I and a few girls

640
00:57:31.000 --> 00:57:37.159
I knew were perfectly idiotic. For
a while, we tousled our hair into

641
00:57:37.199 --> 00:57:43.199
mops, dressed in floppy garments of
damask and brocade with enormous sieves, and

642
00:57:43.280 --> 00:57:49.119
held meetings among ourselves to talk nonsense
about art. We sat in attitudes,

643
00:57:49.559 --> 00:57:53.639
holding a sunflower or a peacock's feather, and were perfectly ridiculous. That is

644
00:57:53.679 --> 00:57:59.280
why Papa still says such things.
I'm not so silly now, but I'm

645
00:57:59.320 --> 00:58:05.039
still very fond of reading. And
is that so very esthetic? Frank looked

646
00:58:05.079 --> 00:58:09.639
smilingly into her honest, clear gray
eyes, and her ringing, decided voice

647
00:58:09.840 --> 00:58:15.400
had an apologetic tone, as if
she were asking pardon for her little display

648
00:58:15.440 --> 00:58:19.960
of learning. He understood that there
was nothing of the Blue Stocking in this

649
00:58:20.079 --> 00:58:23.960
girl, as might have seemed from
her sententious jest before, and he was

650
00:58:24.079 --> 00:58:29.760
quite vexed with himself for having been
compelled to confess that he knew nothing of

651
00:58:29.800 --> 00:58:34.719
the poet Spencer. How stupid she
must think him. But it was a

652
00:58:34.760 --> 00:58:38.039
moment when the beauties of the scenery
had so bewitched them that they moved,

653
00:58:38.079 --> 00:58:43.239
as it were, in a magic
circle of sympathy, in which some unknown

654
00:58:43.360 --> 00:58:51.039
law overruled their natural impulses, something
electrically swift and etherially subtle. As they

655
00:58:51.079 --> 00:58:54.719
climbed the meandering mountain track or made
shortcuts through the low brushwood, where the

656
00:58:54.800 --> 00:59:00.440
leaves glistened in the sun like polished
green needles, And as he breathed that

657
00:59:00.639 --> 00:59:05.079
pure, intoxicating air, Frank felt
as though he had known her quite a

658
00:59:05.119 --> 00:59:07.719
long time, as if it were
years since he had first seen her at

659
00:59:07.719 --> 00:59:14.599
the table dote at dorontiim Ad.
Sir Archibald and Bertie Lingering behind were far

660
00:59:14.719 --> 00:59:22.280
off miles away. Mere remembered images
Eva's voice joined with his own inharmonious union,

661
00:59:22.719 --> 00:59:27.039
as though their fragmentary talk of art
and poetry were a duet which they

662
00:59:27.039 --> 00:59:30.639
both knew how to sing. Although
Frank candidly confessed that he had read but

663
00:59:30.800 --> 00:59:37.800
little that what he had read he
scarcely remembered, she playfully scolded him,

664
00:59:37.960 --> 00:59:43.039
and her sweet clear tones now and
then startled a bird, which flew piping

665
00:59:43.119 --> 00:59:47.360
out of the shrubs. He felt
within him a revival of strength, a

666
00:59:47.480 --> 00:59:52.920
new birth, and would fain have
spread his arms to embrace the air.

667
00:59:55.440 --> 01:00:00.559
Two that evening, on their return
from their war, after dinner, over

668
01:00:00.599 --> 01:00:06.800
a cup of coffee, they discussed
their further projects. We are going to

669
01:00:06.920 --> 01:00:13.239
milder, said Sir Archibald, and
so are we, Frank, exclaimed The

670
01:00:13.280 --> 01:00:16.559
old gentleman at once expressed a wish
that the friends would continue to give him

671
01:00:16.559 --> 01:00:22.679
and his daughter the pleasure of their
society. Frank had taken a great fancy

672
01:00:22.719 --> 01:00:28.599
to him, and Bertie thought him
courteous and good company. Bertie had talked

673
01:00:28.639 --> 01:00:31.400
a good deal about America, but
he had not told the whole history of

674
01:00:31.440 --> 01:00:37.239
his farming experiences in the far West. He had indeed idealized it a little

675
01:00:37.480 --> 01:00:43.920
by speaking of my farm, and
Frank did not contradict him. By the

676
01:00:44.039 --> 01:00:46.840
end of two days spent at Fronteign, they were the best of friends,

677
01:00:47.320 --> 01:00:53.320
with that confidential intimacy which on a
tour when etiquette is out of court sometimes

678
01:00:53.360 --> 01:01:00.000
arises from mere contact without any knowledge
of character on either side, and sympathy

679
01:01:00.039 --> 01:01:07.880
in trifles and mutual attraction a superficial
sentiment of transient admiration which occupies the traveler's

680
01:01:07.920 --> 01:01:14.079
leisure the day on the sea by
steamboat to Malder was like a party of

681
01:01:14.119 --> 01:01:17.679
pleasure in spite of the rain which
drove them below. And in the cabin

682
01:01:17.920 --> 01:01:22.159
over a bottle of champagne, Miss
Eva and the three men played a rubber

683
01:01:22.199 --> 01:01:28.039
of whist but afterwards, in a
gleam of pale sunshine, there was an

684
01:01:28.159 --> 01:01:31.920
endless walk to and fro on the
wet deck. The low, rocky shore

685
01:01:31.920 --> 01:01:37.840
glided slowly past on the larboard side, the hills varying in outline, now

686
01:01:37.880 --> 01:01:43.719
close together and again showing a gap
covered with brown moss down by the water,

687
01:01:44.239 --> 01:01:49.960
and gray above with patches of pale
rose or dull purple lights at Christian

688
01:01:50.039 --> 01:01:52.599
sand. They were far from land, and the waters, now rougher,

689
01:01:52.920 --> 01:01:59.960
were crimson in the glory of the
sinking sun fast approaching the horizon. Everywhere

690
01:02:00.239 --> 01:02:04.119
had a crest of flame colored foam, as though the ocean were on fire.

691
01:02:05.239 --> 01:02:08.360
Frankened Eva, meanwhile, pacing up
and down, laughed at each other's

692
01:02:08.360 --> 01:02:14.880
faces, reddened like a couple of
pianists, or like two maskers rouged by

693
01:02:14.920 --> 01:02:19.920
the glow of the sun, to
the semblance of clowns. They reached Malda

694
01:02:20.000 --> 01:02:23.719
late at night, too late to
see its lovely feord. But next morning

695
01:02:24.199 --> 01:02:30.199
there it lay before them, a
long, narrow inlet encircled by mountains,

696
01:02:30.280 --> 01:02:35.559
capped with snow, a poem a
song of mountains, pure, lofty,

697
01:02:35.719 --> 01:02:40.639
beautiful, severe, solemn, without
one jarring note. The sky above them

698
01:02:40.719 --> 01:02:46.119
was calmly gray, like brooding melancholy, and the peace that rains sounded like

699
01:02:46.159 --> 01:02:55.199
a passionless and ante. Three next
day, when Sir Archibald proposed a walk

700
01:02:55.239 --> 01:03:00.199
at Maldehoy, Bertie declared that he
was tired and did not feel well,

701
01:03:00.559 --> 01:03:05.559
and begged to be left at home. In point of fact, he thought

702
01:03:05.559 --> 01:03:08.880
that the weather did not look promising. Heavy clouds were gathering about the chain

703
01:03:08.920 --> 01:03:14.079
of hilltops, which shut in the
fiord like a sweeping drapery of rain,

704
01:03:14.559 --> 01:03:20.079
threatening ere long to fall and wrap
everything in their gloomy folds. Eva,

705
01:03:20.159 --> 01:03:23.320
however, would not be checked by
bad weather. When people were traveling.

706
01:03:23.599 --> 01:03:29.599
They must not be afraid of a
wetting So the three set out, and

707
01:03:29.719 --> 01:03:34.000
Bertie, in his patent slippers,
remained in the drawing room of the Grand

708
01:03:34.000 --> 01:03:38.400
Hotel with a book and a half
pint bottle. The road was muddy,

709
01:03:38.760 --> 01:03:44.960
but they stepped out valiantly in their
waterproofs and stout boots. The rain,

710
01:03:45.039 --> 01:03:49.159
which hung threateningly above their heads,
did not daunt them, but gave a

711
01:03:49.159 --> 01:03:52.920
touch of romantic adventure to the expedition, as though it threatened to submerge them

712
01:03:52.920 --> 01:04:00.000
in an impending deluge. Once off
the beaten road and still toiling upwards,

713
01:04:00.519 --> 01:04:03.679
they occasionally missed the track, which
was lost in a plashy bog, or

714
01:04:03.800 --> 01:04:09.960
under ferns dripping with rain, or
struck across a wild growth of blue bilberries.

715
01:04:11.199 --> 01:04:15.840
They crossed the morass, using the
rocks as stepping stones, the old

716
01:04:15.880 --> 01:04:19.760
gentleman without help, and Eva with
her hand on Frank's, fearing lest her

717
01:04:19.760 --> 01:04:25.760
little feat should slide on the smooth
green moss. She laughed, gaily,

718
01:04:26.280 --> 01:04:30.599
skipping from stone to stone with his
help, sometimes suddenly slipping and supporting herself

719
01:04:30.639 --> 01:04:35.559
against his shoulder, and then again
going on bravely trying the stones with her

720
01:04:35.599 --> 01:04:41.760
stout stick. She felt as though
she need take no particular heed, now

721
01:04:41.800 --> 01:04:45.559
that he was at her side,
that he would support her if she stumbled,

722
01:04:45.000 --> 01:04:49.320
and they chatted eagerly as they went, almost leaping from rock to rock.

723
01:04:50.519 --> 01:04:56.079
What sort of man is your friend, mister westhova Eva suddenly inquired.

724
01:04:57.280 --> 01:05:00.760
Frank was a little startled. It
was always an unpleasant task to give any

725
01:05:00.800 --> 01:05:06.039
information concerning Bertie, less on account
of his past life than of his present

726
01:05:06.159 --> 01:05:13.519
position, his quiet sponging on himself. Frank, who though enslaved by Bertie

727
01:05:13.920 --> 01:05:16.679
knew full well that the situation was
strange, to say the least of it

728
01:05:17.199 --> 01:05:21.519
in the eyes of the world.
Oh, he's a man who's been very

729
01:05:21.599 --> 01:05:27.840
unfortunate, he said evasively. Had
he presently added? Has he not made

730
01:05:27.840 --> 01:05:32.039
a pleasant impression on you? Eva
laughed so heartily that she was near falling

731
01:05:32.079 --> 01:05:36.440
into a pool of mud if Frank
had not firmly thrown his arm round her

732
01:05:36.480 --> 01:05:43.639
waist. Eva Eva cried her father, shaking his head. Pray be more

733
01:05:43.679 --> 01:05:48.719
careful. Eva threw herself up with
a slight blush. What can I say,

734
01:05:49.119 --> 01:05:53.880
she went on, pursuing the subject, if I were to speak the

735
01:05:53.920 --> 01:05:59.159
whole truth, of course, But
perhaps you will be vexed, For I

736
01:05:59.199 --> 01:06:02.559
can see very plainly that you are
quite infatuated with your friend. Then you

737
01:06:02.639 --> 01:06:08.480
do not like him? Well,
then if you insist on knowing the first

738
01:06:08.559 --> 01:06:13.199
day, when I made his acquaintance, I thought him insufferable. With you,

739
01:06:13.639 --> 01:06:17.679
we got on famously at once as
an amusing traveling companion, but with

740
01:06:17.840 --> 01:06:21.880
him. But perhaps he has not
traveled much. Oh, yes he has,

741
01:06:23.440 --> 01:06:28.239
said Frank, who could not help
smiling. Well, then perhaps he

742
01:06:28.400 --> 01:06:32.000
was shy or awkward. However,
I began to think differently of him after

743
01:06:32.039 --> 01:06:38.840
that. I don't think him insufferable
now. It was strange, but Frank

744
01:06:38.920 --> 01:06:44.639
felt no particular satisfaction on hearing the
young lady's changed opinion. He made no

745
01:06:44.760 --> 01:06:48.679
reply. You say he has had
much to trouble him, And indeed I

746
01:06:48.719 --> 01:06:53.519
can see it in his face.
There is something so gentle in him,

747
01:06:53.679 --> 01:06:58.639
so tender, I might almost say, such soft dark eyes and such a

748
01:06:58.679 --> 01:07:02.960
sweet voice. At first, as
I tell you, I found it intolerable,

749
01:07:03.320 --> 01:07:08.400
but now it strikes me as rather
poetical. He must certainly be a

750
01:07:08.440 --> 01:07:13.119
poet and have been crossed in love. He can be no commonplace man.

751
01:07:14.280 --> 01:07:17.639
No, that he certainly is not, said Frank, vaguely. A little

752
01:07:17.639 --> 01:07:23.000
ill at ease over Eva's raptures,
and a mingling of jealousy and regret,

753
01:07:24.360 --> 01:07:28.519
something like an aversion for the worldly
polish, and a dull envy of the

754
01:07:28.559 --> 01:07:32.920
poetic graces which Yva attributed to his
friend, ran through his veins like a

755
01:07:33.039 --> 01:07:39.480
chill. He glanced up, almost
pathetically at the pretty creature, who was

756
01:07:39.519 --> 01:07:45.119
sometimes so shrewd and sometimes so naive, so learned in all that bore on

757
01:07:45.239 --> 01:07:50.280
her favorite studies, so ignorant of
real life. A dim compassion came over

758
01:07:50.400 --> 01:07:55.119
him, and on a sudden the
gray rain clouds weighed upon him with a

759
01:07:55.199 --> 01:08:00.559
pall of melancholy, as though they
were ominous of some inevitable fatality which threatened

760
01:08:00.559 --> 01:08:06.320
to crush her. His fingers involuntarily
clasped her hand more tightly. Here's the

761
01:08:06.360 --> 01:08:11.639
path, once more, cried Sir
Archibald, who was twenty steps ahead of

762
01:08:11.639 --> 01:08:15.479
them. Oh yes, there is
the path. Thank you, mister Westhova,

763
01:08:15.920 --> 01:08:20.239
said Eva, as she sprang from
the last stepping stone, pushing her

764
01:08:20.279 --> 01:08:26.119
way through the snapping bracken to the
beaten track. And up there is the

765
01:08:26.199 --> 01:08:30.279
huts with the weather cock. Her
father went on, I believe we've made

766
01:08:30.279 --> 01:08:33.600
a long round out of our way. Instead of chattering so much, you

767
01:08:33.640 --> 01:08:38.119
would do well to keep a sharp
look out for the path. My old

768
01:08:38.159 --> 01:08:42.880
eyes, you know, but it
was great fun jumping over the stones,

769
01:08:43.359 --> 01:08:46.760
laughed Eva. Far above them,
they could now see the huts with the

770
01:08:46.840 --> 01:08:50.479
tall pole of the weather cock,
and they went on at an easier pace,

771
01:08:51.000 --> 01:08:56.239
their feet sinking into the violet and
a pink blossomed heath. Crushing the

772
01:08:56.279 --> 01:09:02.359
bilberries, dimly purple like tiny grapes. Eva stooped and picked some. Oh

773
01:09:02.840 --> 01:09:09.159
so nice and sweet, she exclaimed, with childish surprise, as she pulled

774
01:09:09.199 --> 01:09:13.159
some more, dyeing her lips and
fingers blue with the juice of the berries.

775
01:09:14.000 --> 01:09:17.479
Taste them, mister Westove. He
took them from her soft, small

776
01:09:17.560 --> 01:09:23.880
hand, stained as it were with
purple blood. It was true, they

777
01:09:23.920 --> 01:09:28.560
were deliciously sweet, and such fine
ones. And then they went on again,

778
01:09:28.760 --> 01:09:32.520
following Sir Archibald, often stopping and
triumphing like children. When they came

779
01:09:32.560 --> 01:09:38.479
on a large patch where the watleberries
had spread unhindered, like a miniature orchard.

780
01:09:39.560 --> 01:09:44.279
Papa, Papa, do try them, Eva cried, heedless of the

781
01:09:44.319 --> 01:09:48.520
fact that Papa was far ahead,
but Sir Archibald was not out of sight,

782
01:09:49.119 --> 01:09:54.000
and they had to run to overtake
him. Eva's laughter ringing like a

783
01:09:54.000 --> 01:09:58.800
bell, while she lamented that she
must leave so many berries untouched, and

784
01:09:58.920 --> 01:10:02.600
such beauties. I dare say there
will be plenty round the hut, said

785
01:10:02.640 --> 01:10:08.520
Frank consolingly. Do you think so, she said, with a merry laugh.

786
01:10:09.239 --> 01:10:13.520
Oh, what a couple of babies
we are. The path grew wider,

787
01:10:13.840 --> 01:10:16.880
and they found it easy walking up
to the top, sometimes quitting the

788
01:10:16.920 --> 01:10:23.039
track and scrambling over the stones to
shorten the way. Presently they heard a

789
01:10:23.119 --> 01:10:27.359
shout, and looking up, they
saw Sir Archibald standing on the cairn,

790
01:10:27.760 --> 01:10:31.319
in which the staff of the weathercock
was fixed, and waving his traveling cap.

791
01:10:32.399 --> 01:10:36.840
They hurried on and soon were at
his side. Eva knocked at the

792
01:10:36.880 --> 01:10:42.119
door of the hut. The hut
is shut up, said her father.

793
01:10:42.960 --> 01:10:46.520
How stupid, she exclaimed. Why
does it stand there at all? If

794
01:10:46.520 --> 01:10:50.359
it's shut up, there's no one
live in it. Why, of course

795
01:10:50.439 --> 01:10:55.560
not, said Sir Archibald, as
if it was the most natural thing in

796
01:10:55.600 --> 01:11:00.520
the world. Frank helped Eva to
climb the cairn round the pole, and

797
01:11:00.600 --> 01:11:05.439
they looked down on the panorama at
their feet. It's beautiful, but melancholy,

798
01:11:05.920 --> 01:11:12.479
said Eva. The long fiord lay
below them, a narrow ribbond of

799
01:11:12.560 --> 01:11:16.720
pale, motionless water, hemmed in
by the mountains, now wreathed with gray

800
01:11:16.800 --> 01:11:25.399
vapor, through which they gleamed fitfully
like ghosts of mountains Laupardon and Venulinda,

801
01:11:25.560 --> 01:11:30.479
Troultinda, and the Romsdal Hall towering
up through the envious rolling mist, which

802
01:11:31.000 --> 01:11:36.039
swelled by the coming storm, hung
in black clouds from every peak and cast

803
01:11:36.039 --> 01:11:42.880
a gloomy reflection on the still waters. The hills were weeping, unsubstantial,

804
01:11:43.039 --> 01:11:48.760
motionless phantoms, sorrowing and tragical under
some august and superhuman woe, a grief

805
01:11:48.840 --> 01:11:55.520
as of giants and demigods. The
Fiord, with its township, a plot

806
01:11:55.560 --> 01:11:59.880
of gardens and roofs and walls,
and the white chalet of the Grand Hotel,

807
01:12:00.439 --> 01:12:04.880
all weeping, all motionless under the
gloomy sky. A ghostly chill rose

808
01:12:04.960 --> 01:12:10.399
up from the gulf to where the
trio stood, mingling with the tangible clamminess

809
01:12:10.399 --> 01:12:15.039
of the mist, which seemed to
weigh on their eyelids. It was not

810
01:12:15.199 --> 01:12:17.520
raining, but the moisture seemed to
distill on them. From the black,

811
01:12:17.600 --> 01:12:24.600
unbroken rack of clouds, and to
the westwards, between two cliffs which parted

812
01:12:24.600 --> 01:12:28.960
to show a gleaming strip of ocean, a streak was visible of pale gold

813
01:12:29.000 --> 01:12:32.479
and faint rose color, hardly more
than a touch of pink. A sparkle

814
01:12:32.520 --> 01:12:39.000
of gold, a stinted arms of
the setting sun. They scarcely said another

815
01:12:39.039 --> 01:12:44.880
word, oppressed by the superhuman sadness
which enwrapped them like a shroud. When

816
01:12:44.960 --> 01:12:49.119
Eva at last spoke, her clear
voice sounded far away through a curtain.

817
01:12:50.359 --> 01:12:55.520
Look, there's a glint of sunshine
over the sea. Here. We are

818
01:12:55.640 --> 01:12:59.840
pining for the sun. Oh I
wish the sun would break through the cloud.

819
01:13:00.520 --> 01:13:05.359
It's so dismal here, so dreary. How well I understand Oswald's cry

820
01:13:05.439 --> 01:13:13.239
in Ibsen's ghosts when he is going
mad the sun the sun men might pray

821
01:13:13.319 --> 01:13:17.520
for sunshine here and get to no
more than that distant gleam Oh I am

822
01:13:17.680 --> 01:13:24.960
perished. She shivered violently under the
stiff, shining folds of her waterproof cloak.

823
01:13:26.199 --> 01:13:30.640
Her face was drawn and white,
and her eyes looked large and anxious.

824
01:13:30.960 --> 01:13:36.039
She suddenly felt herself so forlorn and
lonely that she instinctively took her father's

825
01:13:36.159 --> 01:13:42.600
arm and clung to him closely.
Are you cold, my child? Shall

826
01:13:42.600 --> 01:13:46.319
we go home? He asked?
She nodded, and they both helped her

827
01:13:46.319 --> 01:13:51.479
down the heap of stones. Why
she knew not, but suddenly she had

828
01:13:51.520 --> 01:13:56.279
thought of her mother, who was
dead, and wondered whether she had ever

829
01:13:56.319 --> 01:14:00.600
felt thus forlorn in spite of her
father's fondness. But when they came in

830
01:14:00.680 --> 01:14:04.239
sight of the hut again, she
said, as if it had just occurred

831
01:14:04.239 --> 01:14:10.119
to her Papa, there are some
names cut in the door. Let us

832
01:14:10.119 --> 01:14:15.479
cut ours too, But child,
you are so cold and pale. Never

833
01:14:15.600 --> 01:14:18.319
mind, let us cut our names. I want to, she urged,

834
01:14:18.399 --> 01:14:25.199
like a spoilt child. No,
Eva, what nonsense. Oh but I

835
01:14:25.279 --> 01:14:29.680
do want to, she repeated,
coaxingly, But the old man would not

836
01:14:29.840 --> 01:14:33.800
give in. Grumbling still, Frank, however, pulled out his pocket knife.

837
01:14:35.000 --> 01:14:40.359
Oh, mister Westhova, do cut
my name? Nothing but Eva,

838
01:14:40.520 --> 01:14:45.840
only three letters, will you,
she asked softly. Frank had it on

839
01:14:45.920 --> 01:14:48.239
his lips to say that he would
like to cut his own name with hers,

840
01:14:48.680 --> 01:14:53.720
although it was so long, but
he was silent. It would have

841
01:14:53.800 --> 01:14:59.039
sounded flat and commonplace in the midst
of this mournful scenery. So he carved

842
01:14:59.039 --> 01:15:02.880
the letters on the door, which
was like a traveler's album. Eva stood

843
01:15:02.920 --> 01:15:08.239
gazing out to the west, and
she saw the three streaks of gold turn

844
01:15:08.319 --> 01:15:14.000
pale, and the rose tint fade
away. The sun, the sun she

845
01:15:14.159 --> 01:15:17.479
murmured with a shudder and a faint
smile on her white lips and in her

846
01:15:17.520 --> 01:15:24.079
tearful eyes. A few heavy drops
of rain had begun to fall, so

847
01:15:24.319 --> 01:15:29.359
Archibald asked if they were ever coming, and led the way. Eva nodded

848
01:15:29.399 --> 01:15:31.720
with a smile and went up to
Frank. Have you done, it's,

849
01:15:31.760 --> 01:15:39.079
mister Westover, Yes, said Frank, hastily finishing the last letter. She

850
01:15:39.199 --> 01:15:44.119
looked up and saw that he had
cut Eva rhoades and in very neat,

851
01:15:44.279 --> 01:15:48.880
even letters smoothly finished below he had
roughly cut Frank in a great hurry.

852
01:15:49.920 --> 01:15:55.079
Why did you add roads, she
asked, and her voice was faint,

853
01:15:55.560 --> 01:16:03.199
as if far away, because it
took longer. Frank replied simply four.

854
01:16:04.399 --> 01:16:09.560
They got back to the Grand Hotel
in a torrent of rain. A deluge

855
01:16:09.600 --> 01:16:13.920
poured out of all the urns of
heaven, muddy to their waists, wet

856
01:16:13.960 --> 01:16:17.119
to the skin, and chilled to
the bone. Eva, after a hot

857
01:16:17.159 --> 01:16:20.680
supper, was sent off to bed
by her father and the three men,

858
01:16:21.079 --> 01:16:26.159
Sir Archibald, Frank, and Bertie
sat in the drawing room, where a

859
01:16:26.199 --> 01:16:30.640
few other visitors, all very cross
at the bad weather, tried to solace

860
01:16:30.680 --> 01:16:35.399
themselves with illustrated papers or albums.
The old gentleman took a doze in an

861
01:16:35.439 --> 01:16:42.079
easy chair. Frank gazed pensively at
the straight streaks of rain, which fell

862
01:16:42.199 --> 01:16:46.279
like an endless curtain of close steel
needles thrashing the surface of the fiord.

863
01:16:47.199 --> 01:16:53.640
Bertie sipped to hot grog and luked
as his shiny slippers. And did you

864
01:16:53.720 --> 01:16:58.520
not miss my company on your excursion, he asked, addressing Frank with a

865
01:16:58.560 --> 01:17:02.720
smile, just to break the silence
that reigned in the room. Vesthova turned

866
01:17:02.760 --> 01:17:08.319
to him in some surprise, as
if roused from a dream. Then,

867
01:17:08.479 --> 01:17:13.800
with a frank laugh, he briefly
answered no. Bertie stared at him,

868
01:17:14.000 --> 01:17:17.319
but his friend had already turned away, lost in thought over the patter of

869
01:17:17.359 --> 01:17:23.279
the rain. So Bertie at last
took up his book again and tried to

870
01:17:23.319 --> 01:17:29.359
read, but the letters danced before
his eyes. His ears and nerves still

871
01:17:29.479 --> 01:17:34.760
thrilled uncomfortably under the remembrance of that
one short, astounding word which Frank had

872
01:17:34.800 --> 01:17:40.720
fired into the silence like a leaden
bullet. It annoyed him that Frank should

873
01:17:40.760 --> 01:17:45.960
take no further notice of him.
Frank stood and moved, looking out at

874
01:17:45.000 --> 01:17:50.840
the mountains, scarcely visible through the
watery shroud. What he saw was their

875
01:17:50.880 --> 01:17:57.520
walk back from Maldoy, the meandering
downward path through the tall, dripping bracken,

876
01:17:58.199 --> 01:18:02.359
the pelting rains streaming in the faces
as from a watering pot. Eva

877
01:18:02.560 --> 01:18:08.279
closely wrapped in her wet macintosh and
clinging to his arm as if seeking his

878
01:18:08.359 --> 01:18:14.239
protection. Behind them, her father
carefully feeling the slippery moss grown stones with

879
01:18:14.319 --> 01:18:18.479
his walking stick. Frank had wanted
to wrap her in his own thick waterproof

880
01:18:18.560 --> 01:18:24.399
coat, but this she had positively
rejected. She would not have him made

881
01:18:24.479 --> 01:18:29.479
ill for her sake, she said
in that far away voice. And then

882
01:18:29.560 --> 01:18:32.600
when they were home again, after
they had changed their clothes and dined and

883
01:18:32.720 --> 01:18:39.039
laughed over their adventure, Sir Archibald
was afraid lest Eva should have taken cold.

884
01:18:40.279 --> 01:18:45.119
Frank remembered at this moment the fragments
of their conversation, his asking her,

885
01:18:45.560 --> 01:18:49.279
a little surprised, in spite of
himself, have you read Ibsen's Ghosts?

886
01:18:49.720 --> 01:18:55.279
You spoke of Oswald when we were
up on Milderhoy. As it happened,

887
01:18:55.720 --> 01:18:59.119
he had himself read Ghosts, and
he did not think it's a book

888
01:18:59.199 --> 01:19:03.199
for a young girl. She noticed
his surprise and had blushed deeply as she

889
01:19:03.239 --> 01:19:08.479
replied, Yes, I have read
it. I read a great deal,

890
01:19:08.880 --> 01:19:12.640
and Papa has brought me up on
rather liberal lines. Do you think that

891
01:19:12.720 --> 01:19:16.479
I ought not to have read Ghosts? She herself had seen no harm in

892
01:19:16.520 --> 01:19:23.319
it and had not perhaps fully understood
it, As she candidly confessed, he

893
01:19:23.399 --> 01:19:27.800
had not ventured to tell her that
the study of such a drama of physiological

894
01:19:27.840 --> 01:19:31.920
heredity was, to say the least, unnecessary for a young girl. She

895
01:19:32.000 --> 01:19:36.880
had answered vaguely, and she had
colored yet more deeply and said no more.

896
01:19:39.039 --> 01:19:42.640
She must have regarded me as a
prig of a schoolmaster, thought he

897
01:19:43.159 --> 01:19:46.279
Ill at ease. Why should she
not read what she likes? She does

898
01:19:46.319 --> 01:19:50.560
not need my permission for her reading. She has grown up enough. She

899
01:19:50.640 --> 01:19:57.119
must have thought me a pedantic owl. Frank, said Bertie again. What

900
01:19:57.600 --> 01:20:02.359
said Frank startled? Will this place
tomorrow morning? I suppose yes, that

901
01:20:02.520 --> 01:20:06.680
was our plan, at least if
the weather improves. What is the name

902
01:20:06.720 --> 01:20:13.359
of the next outlandish spot? We
are going to fabe lungs Nas and from

903
01:20:13.399 --> 01:20:18.279
there to Romsdahl and gudbrand Stahl and
the roads. They are going to bergen

904
01:20:19.079 --> 01:20:26.920
tomorrow I don't know, And he
stood once more lost in thought, the

905
01:20:27.000 --> 01:20:30.640
gray, wet atmosphere without cast a
gloom on the scene. Within, and

906
01:20:30.760 --> 01:20:35.399
in his soul too, rained the
deepest gloom. What was the use of

907
01:20:35.479 --> 01:20:42.840
fostering warm feelings when a few days
of sympathetic companionship could only end imparting?

908
01:20:44.039 --> 01:20:47.399
This was always the case with friendly
traveling acquaintance. And was it not so

909
01:20:47.600 --> 01:20:54.560
throughout life? With everyone everything we
love? Was it worthwhile to care for

910
01:20:54.640 --> 01:21:00.279
anything? Was not all love a
great delusion by which men blinded themselves to

911
01:21:00.319 --> 01:21:13.359
their disgust at life? End of
section two, Section three of Footsteps of

912
01:21:13.399 --> 01:21:20.239
Fate by Luis Kuperus. This LibriVox
recording is in the public domain. Part

913
01:21:20.319 --> 01:21:28.960
three one to six, one December
in London, cold and foggy, white

914
01:21:29.079 --> 01:21:32.520
rose cottage, wrapped in mist,
in the back room a blazing fire.

915
01:21:33.119 --> 01:21:38.000
But Robert van meyer And was no
longer in the blissful mood to enjoy this

916
01:21:38.119 --> 01:21:43.600
luxury as we have hitherto known him. Moreover, he now regarded it as

917
01:21:43.680 --> 01:21:46.640
quite a matter of course, which
came to him by right, since he

918
01:21:46.760 --> 01:21:53.239
was a creature of such refined feeling, so slight and fragile, and did

919
01:21:53.279 --> 01:21:59.439
not feel himself born to endure poverty
and want. Still he had known misery,

920
01:22:00.039 --> 01:22:02.760
slavery of hired labor, to which
he had bent his back with crafty

921
01:22:02.840 --> 01:22:09.399
subservience. Still he had felt the
gnawings of hunger, the bitterness of squalid

922
01:22:09.439 --> 01:22:14.199
beggary. But all this seemed long
ago, and as vague as a dream,

923
01:22:14.439 --> 01:22:17.760
or as the vanishing lines of London
streets out there, dimmed and blurred

924
01:22:17.840 --> 01:22:23.479
by the pall of fog, as
indistinct as our dubious impressions of a former

925
01:22:23.560 --> 01:22:29.560
state of existence. For after his
metamorphosis, he had determined to forget.

926
01:22:30.039 --> 01:22:33.760
He had forced himself to forget,
never for an instant to recall his sufferings,

927
01:22:33.880 --> 01:22:39.399
ought to think of the future.
He hated the past as an injustice,

928
01:22:39.880 --> 01:22:45.520
a disgrace, an ineradicable stain on
the superficial spotlessness of his present life.

929
01:22:45.560 --> 01:22:49.640
He persuaded himself that all those things
which he had now hidden, buried,

930
01:22:49.840 --> 01:22:55.560
forever ignored, had indeed never happened. Had he had succeeded in this

931
01:22:55.640 --> 01:23:00.600
effacement of his life in America,
it seemed wiped out of the annals of

932
01:23:00.640 --> 01:23:06.840
his memory. Why now must those
years rise slowly before him, like ghosts

933
01:23:06.840 --> 01:23:11.520
out of the grave of oblivion.
What had they to say to him?

934
01:23:11.560 --> 01:23:15.760
Now? Nearer and nearer, till
year by year, month by month,

935
01:23:16.000 --> 01:23:20.119
day by day they passed before him, dancing in the flames at which he

936
01:23:20.159 --> 01:23:25.960
sat staring, like a dance of
death. Of the years. They grinned

937
01:23:25.960 --> 01:23:30.479
at him from skulls with hollow eyes
and pallid faces distorted by a crafty smile,

938
01:23:31.560 --> 01:23:36.319
the dead years which beckoned to him, wearing filthy rags and poisoning his

939
01:23:36.359 --> 01:23:42.359
cigar with their foul odor. He
saw them, He smelt them, He

940
01:23:42.479 --> 01:23:46.680
shuddered with their chill. There in
front of the fire. He felt their

941
01:23:46.760 --> 01:23:51.399
hunger, in spite of the dinner
that awaited him. Why was it that

942
01:23:51.439 --> 01:23:57.119
the future, which he no less
persistently ignored, was beginning to hang over

943
01:23:57.199 --> 01:24:00.640
him as an omen of evil,
which each day he jour brought nearer and

944
01:24:00.720 --> 01:24:08.479
nearer irresistibly inevitably. That future must
perhaps be such as the past had been.

945
01:24:10.680 --> 01:24:16.000
Yes, something was impending there he
sat, sick with alarms, cowardly,

946
01:24:16.199 --> 01:24:20.960
spiritless, sea feet. Something was
in the air. He felt its

947
01:24:21.000 --> 01:24:26.359
coming nearer to overwhelm him, to
wrestle with him for life or death.

948
01:24:26.560 --> 01:24:31.479
In a frenzy of despair, he
felt himself tottering, sinking. He was

949
01:24:31.560 --> 01:24:35.479
torn from the ease and comfort of
his present life, cast out into the

950
01:24:35.520 --> 01:24:41.159
streets without shelter, without anything,
for what had he of his own?

951
01:24:42.000 --> 01:24:45.640
The clothes he wore, the shoes
on his feet, the ring on his

952
01:24:45.680 --> 01:24:49.760
finger were franks. The dinner to
come, the bed upstairs were franks.

953
01:24:50.239 --> 01:24:54.359
Thus had it been for a year
past? And if he were to go

954
01:24:54.439 --> 01:24:58.720
with all he possessed, he would
go naked in the winter, And he

955
01:24:58.720 --> 01:25:01.800
could not again be as he had
been in America, tramping for work day

956
01:25:01.840 --> 01:25:06.960
after day. His body and mind
alike were enervated, as by a warm

957
01:25:08.000 --> 01:25:12.960
bath of luxury. He had become
like a hothouse plant, which is accustomed

958
01:25:13.000 --> 01:25:15.880
to the moist heat and perishes when
it is placed in the open air.

959
01:25:16.960 --> 01:25:23.520
But it hung over him, cruel
and unrelenting. Not for an instant did

960
01:25:23.520 --> 01:25:28.800
the threat relax, And in his
abject weakness, he feebly wrung his white

961
01:25:28.840 --> 01:25:35.680
hands, and two tears, hot
with despair, rolled down his cheeks struggle

962
01:25:35.760 --> 01:25:41.880
for existence. He was incapable of
such a battle. His energy was too

963
01:25:41.960 --> 01:25:45.960
lax for that, a laxity which
he had felt growing on him as a

964
01:25:45.079 --> 01:25:49.960
joy after his fight for life,
but which now had made him powerless to

965
01:25:50.000 --> 01:25:57.760
screw himself up to the merest semblance
of determination. And before him he saw

966
01:25:57.840 --> 01:26:02.680
the fateful chain of events passing onwards, some so infinitely small, each detail

967
01:26:02.720 --> 01:26:09.239
a terrible link, and all leading
on to catastrophe. Strange that each one

968
01:26:09.319 --> 01:26:14.199
was the outcome of its predecessor,
the future, the outcome of the past.

969
01:26:15.079 --> 01:26:18.399
If after his failure from sheer idleness
at Leiden, his father had not

970
01:26:18.600 --> 01:26:23.560
placed him as clerk in the office
of a Manchester house, he would probably

971
01:26:23.640 --> 01:26:29.720
never have known certain youths, his
fellow clerks, fashionable young rakes and fierce

972
01:26:29.800 --> 01:26:35.119
strugglers for existence, still scarcely more
than boys had already the worse for dissipation.

973
01:26:36.279 --> 01:26:40.760
If he had never known them,
And yet how pleasantly had they borne

974
01:26:40.840 --> 01:26:45.239
him along merely by humoring his natural
bent, he might perhaps not have played

975
01:26:45.279 --> 01:26:49.920
such underhand tricks with the money belonging
to the firm that his patron, out

976
01:26:49.960 --> 01:26:54.920
of sympathy and regard for his father, had helped him to go to America.

977
01:26:56.119 --> 01:27:00.039
That was where he had sunk deepest, swamped in the mailstre more energetic

978
01:27:00.119 --> 01:27:05.359
fortune hunters. If only he had
been less unlucky in America, he would

979
01:27:05.359 --> 01:27:11.520
not have found himself stranded in London
in such utter destitution, or have applied

980
01:27:11.560 --> 01:27:16.600
to Vestovah for help. And Frank
but for his suggestion, Frank would never

981
01:27:16.640 --> 01:27:21.560
have gone to Norway, never have
met Eva. Oh, that journey to

982
01:27:21.640 --> 01:27:27.920
Norway, how he cursed it now, for Frank might perhaps not have fallen

983
01:27:27.920 --> 01:27:33.000
in love and never thought of marriage. And only yesterday Vestova had called at

984
01:27:33.000 --> 01:27:39.119
Sir Archibald's house whether two friends had
been made very welcome after their acquaintance in

985
01:27:39.239 --> 01:27:45.319
Norway, and had come home engaged
to Eva. Frank would marry and he

986
01:27:45.840 --> 01:27:49.159
Bertie? Where was he to go? What was to become of him?

987
01:27:49.680 --> 01:27:55.079
He was painfully conscious of the fatality
of life, of the injustice of the

988
01:27:55.119 --> 01:28:00.199
dispensations of fortune. And he discerned
that his own immediate difficul cultis owed their

989
01:28:00.239 --> 01:28:06.840
origin to a single word, one
single word, Norway, Norway, Eva,

990
01:28:08.439 --> 01:28:14.439
Frank's falling in love, Frank's engagement
and marriage, and his own shipwreck.

991
01:28:15.680 --> 01:28:18.720
How horribly clear he saw every link
of the chain of his own life

992
01:28:19.000 --> 01:28:26.560
in each word, one word uttered
under a foolish impulse Norway, and it

993
01:28:26.640 --> 01:28:30.000
had irretrievably wrought to the happiness of
two other persons at the cost of his

994
01:28:30.119 --> 01:28:38.680
own injustice. In justice, had
he cursed the impulse, the mysterious innates

995
01:28:38.720 --> 01:28:43.920
force which more or less prompts every
word we speak? And he cursed the

996
01:28:44.000 --> 01:28:48.920
facts that every word uttered by the
tongue of man remains beyond recall. What

997
01:28:49.159 --> 01:28:56.039
is that impulse? Something obscurely good
and unconscious better self as men declare,

998
01:28:56.439 --> 01:29:00.359
which, though deeply and mysteriously hidden, dashes ahead like an unbroken colt,

999
01:29:01.039 --> 01:29:06.439
treading down the most elaborate results of
careful thought. Oh, if he had

1000
01:29:06.479 --> 01:29:12.800
but held his tongue, why Norway? What concern had he with that one

1001
01:29:13.000 --> 01:29:18.239
fatal, fateful land above all others? Why not Spain, Russia, Japan?

1002
01:29:18.800 --> 01:29:24.520
Good God can chat her for aught? He cared, why, especially

1003
01:29:24.600 --> 01:29:30.159
Norway idiotic impulse, which had unlocked
his miserable lips to pronounce that luckless name.

1004
01:29:30.640 --> 01:29:35.119
And Oh, the injustice of fate, of life, of everything,

1005
01:29:36.520 --> 01:29:42.880
energy, will? What could will
and energy do against fate? They were

1006
01:29:42.880 --> 01:29:46.880
words, empty words, be a
cringing fatalist like a Turk or Arab,

1007
01:29:47.159 --> 01:29:51.920
And let day follow day, never
think, for behind thoughts, lurks,

1008
01:29:51.960 --> 01:29:59.920
impulse, fight against fate, who
forges her chains blindly, link upon link.

1009
01:30:00.079 --> 01:30:04.640
He threw himself back in his chair, still feebly wringing his hands,

1010
01:30:05.079 --> 01:30:11.279
and the tears trickled again and again
down his cheeks. He saw his own

1011
01:30:11.319 --> 01:30:15.279
cowardice take shape before him. He
stared into its frightened eyes, and he

1012
01:30:15.359 --> 01:30:19.920
did not condemn it, for he
was as Fate had made him. He

1013
01:30:20.039 --> 01:30:25.520
was a craven, and he could
not help it. Men called such a

1014
01:30:25.560 --> 01:30:29.279
one as he a coward. It
was but a word. Why coward?

1015
01:30:29.720 --> 01:30:33.079
Or simple and loyal and brave,
or good and noble. It was all

1016
01:30:33.119 --> 01:30:39.039
a matter of convention, of accepted
meaning. The whole world was mere convention,

1017
01:30:39.479 --> 01:30:43.720
a concept, an illusion of the
brain. There was nothing real at

1018
01:30:43.760 --> 01:30:48.960
all, nothing, and yet there
was something real. Misery and poverty were

1019
01:30:49.000 --> 01:30:54.039
real. He had felt them,
wrestled with them hand to hand, and

1020
01:30:54.119 --> 01:30:58.680
now he was too weak to fight
them again, too delicate, too refined,

1021
01:31:00.039 --> 01:31:04.079
would not face them again. Then, leaning back with his pallid head

1022
01:31:04.199 --> 01:31:09.399
resting against the cushion the back of
his chair, his deep set, black

1023
01:31:09.439 --> 01:31:14.640
eyes clouded with the venom of these
reflections, he was aware of a gentle,

1024
01:31:14.840 --> 01:31:19.680
pleasing electric current thrilling through him,
a current of will. Fatality had

1025
01:31:19.680 --> 01:31:25.760
willed to bring Frank and Eva together. Well, he, a mere plaything

1026
01:31:25.840 --> 01:31:30.640
of fate, would will that,
Yes, he would will to part them.

1027
01:31:30.800 --> 01:31:34.079
And before his very eyes, as
it seemed that purpose rose up,

1028
01:31:34.479 --> 01:31:41.119
cold and rigid, an evil and
mysterious form, like an incarnation of satanic

1029
01:31:41.199 --> 01:31:45.479
malignity. It looked at him with
the eye of a sybil, of a

1030
01:31:45.520 --> 01:31:50.119
sphynx. And as compared with the
titanic cruelty of that image, his former

1031
01:31:50.199 --> 01:31:55.720
vision sank into nothingness. The dance
of death, of the years, the

1032
01:31:55.800 --> 01:32:00.479
continuity of fatality, had his cursing
of it. All these now vanished,

1033
01:32:00.720 --> 01:32:05.560
and he only saw that figure,
like a ghost, almost tangible and almost

1034
01:32:05.680 --> 01:32:12.239
visibly solid in the dusk against the
dying glow of the fire. The gloomy,

1035
01:32:12.359 --> 01:32:17.079
questioning gaze of those eyes hypnotized his
soul. His instincts fell asleep under

1036
01:32:17.079 --> 01:32:25.079
its crushing power. Friendship, gratitude, They too were mere words. There

1037
01:32:25.119 --> 01:32:30.600
was nothing real in life but conventionality
and poverty. And then there was that

1038
01:32:30.720 --> 01:32:35.039
image there in front of the fire, with its staring, fixed gaze,

1039
01:32:35.399 --> 01:32:45.560
petrified to an embodiment of silence,
irresistible, infernal magnetism. Two that night,

1040
01:32:45.800 --> 01:32:49.079
he saw Frank no more, for
he had stayed to dine with Sir

1041
01:32:49.159 --> 01:32:56.479
Archibald Roads van Mehren. Could not
sleep. The wildest fancies kept him wide

1042
01:32:56.520 --> 01:33:02.119
awake. Illusions and schemes whirled through
his feet brain. Strange voices buzzed in

1043
01:33:02.199 --> 01:33:08.439
his ears, hissing like an angry
sea. He saw himself sitting with Eva

1044
01:33:08.479 --> 01:33:14.760
in a cab passing through the gloomiest
and foulest parts of London. Squalid figures

1045
01:33:14.720 --> 01:33:18.359
stood in their way and came close
to Eva. He laughed as he saw

1046
01:33:18.399 --> 01:33:23.520
her dragged away by men with brutal
faces, and then come back to him

1047
01:33:23.760 --> 01:33:29.640
with her clothes torn, sobbing because
she had been insulted. A fearful headache

1048
01:33:29.680 --> 01:33:33.079
hammered in his brain, and he
groaned with a painful effort to control the

1049
01:33:33.119 --> 01:33:39.399
wild extravagance of his fancy. He
got up, rubbing his eyes as if

1050
01:33:39.439 --> 01:33:43.760
to drive away the melodramatic vision.
Had wrapped his burning head in a wet,

1051
01:33:43.880 --> 01:33:48.319
cold towel. He involuntarily looked in
the glass, and in the subdued

1052
01:33:48.399 --> 01:33:53.520
glimmer of the night light, his
face stared back at him as pale as

1053
01:33:53.600 --> 01:33:58.239
death, drawn and haggard, with
hollow sunken eyes and a gaping mouth.

1054
01:33:59.399 --> 01:34:02.920
His heart beat violently, as if
it were rising into his throat, and

1055
01:34:03.039 --> 01:34:08.680
he pressed it down with both hands. After drinking a glass of water,

1056
01:34:09.039 --> 01:34:14.880
he lay down again, forcing himself
to be calm. Subtler fancies now crowded

1057
01:34:14.880 --> 01:34:19.760
his mind like fine threads caught a
thwart and across webbs mingled in a maze,

1058
01:34:19.840 --> 01:34:26.319
like an inextricable tangle of lace,
and his imagination worked out the intricacies

1059
01:34:26.359 --> 01:34:30.000
of weariful intrigues, as though he
were a poet who, during a night

1060
01:34:30.079 --> 01:34:35.600
of lucid sleeplessness, constructs a drama, and, not content with its plot,

1061
01:34:36.039 --> 01:34:41.720
goes through it again and again to
master the great conception in his mind

1062
01:34:41.840 --> 01:34:46.359
before writing it out. Now he
saw the orges of a past day repeating

1063
01:34:46.399 --> 01:34:50.880
themselves below in the sitting room,
he saw the skating rink and Frank and

1064
01:34:51.039 --> 01:34:58.560
himself drinking champagne and laughing and singing. But suddenly the door opened as Archibald

1065
01:34:58.640 --> 01:35:03.199
came in with Eva on his arm. So Archibald cursed Frank with tremendous words

1066
01:35:03.239 --> 01:35:09.319
and vehement gestures, and Frank hung
his head, but Eva threw herself between

1067
01:35:09.359 --> 01:35:14.079
them with words of anguish and imploring
hands. And it was all the last

1068
01:35:14.079 --> 01:35:17.800
scene of the fourth act of an
opera. The singing in his ears and

1069
01:35:17.840 --> 01:35:23.439
the dreadful throbbing in his aching head
were like the thunder of a full orchestra,

1070
01:35:23.920 --> 01:35:28.520
excited to the utmost by the beat
of an energetic conductor and the loud,

1071
01:35:28.600 --> 01:35:34.319
strident crash of brass instruments. Bertie
moaned and tossed from side to side,

1072
01:35:34.760 --> 01:35:41.039
compelling himself to picture less violent scenes. Now it was like a modern

1073
01:35:41.039 --> 01:35:45.760
comedy. Eva, at his suggestion, was suspiciously watching Annie, the maiden

1074
01:35:45.880 --> 01:35:53.600
housekeeper at White Rose Cottage. Eva
was jealous, and then a grand catastrophe.

1075
01:35:54.000 --> 01:35:59.760
Eva, finding Annie in Frank's arms, sick with thinking, bewildered by

1076
01:35:59.800 --> 01:36:05.199
his his own imaginings, he drove
away the chaotic vision. Exhaustion overcame him.

1077
01:36:05.600 --> 01:36:10.840
His frenzy was worn out, though
his head was still burning, throbbing,

1078
01:36:11.039 --> 01:36:15.920
bursting, although acute pain shot through
his brain from his brows to his

1079
01:36:15.079 --> 01:36:20.319
neck as if he were being scalped, Although the blood in his temples leapt

1080
01:36:20.439 --> 01:36:27.479
furiously in his veins with rhythmical torture, and in the immediate torment of physical

1081
01:36:27.520 --> 01:36:31.920
suffering, his pride, which was
to defy fatality, collapsed like a tower

1082
01:36:32.000 --> 01:36:39.560
crumbling into ruins. His imagination became
vacancy. He forgot his terrors of the

1083
01:36:39.600 --> 01:36:45.760
future. He lay motionless, bathed
in clammy sweat, his eyes and mouth

1084
01:36:45.840 --> 01:36:50.000
wide open, and the indecision of
exhaustion cast a softened light on all his

1085
01:36:50.119 --> 01:36:57.000
fancies, mere delirious dreams, which
could never bear the faintest resemblance to reality.

1086
01:36:58.159 --> 01:37:01.760
Things must go on as they might. He lazily thought the future was

1087
01:37:01.800 --> 01:37:06.119
still remote. He would think no
more about it. He would let himself

1088
01:37:06.159 --> 01:37:12.520
go with the chain of events link
by link. It was madness to double

1089
01:37:12.520 --> 01:37:21.199
his fists against fate, which was
so strong so omnipotence. Three the following

1090
01:37:21.279 --> 01:37:27.159
days passed quietly enough, though a
vague fear still hung over Bertie's head.

1091
01:37:28.199 --> 01:37:31.640
He bowed that head without further thought, but still with a dull ferment in

1092
01:37:31.680 --> 01:37:38.000
the depths of his heart, below
the superficial calm. Then one day he

1093
01:37:38.079 --> 01:37:42.119
went with Frank to the roads,
and Eva, taking his hand, said

1094
01:37:42.479 --> 01:37:45.560
we shall be good friends, shall
we not? And after she had spoken,

1095
01:37:45.920 --> 01:37:50.880
he heard her voice still ringing in
his ears like little bells. He

1096
01:37:50.960 --> 01:37:57.359
mechanically let his velvety eyes rest on
hers and smiled and allowed her to lead

1097
01:37:57.439 --> 01:38:01.239
him to a sofa and show him
designs for furniture and patterns of curtains for

1098
01:38:01.319 --> 01:38:06.560
their new home, her home and
Frank's. Frank himself sat a little way

1099
01:38:06.600 --> 01:38:12.840
off talking to Sir Archibald. He
looked at them, sitting side by side,

1100
01:38:13.119 --> 01:38:16.319
like brother and sister, on the
softly cushioned settee, their heads bent

1101
01:38:16.399 --> 01:38:21.199
together over the rustling pages of the
pattern book, their hands meeting from time

1102
01:38:21.239 --> 01:38:27.319
to time, and his brows were
knit in a frown of displeasure. And

1103
01:38:27.399 --> 01:38:30.640
yet he laughed and said to Eva, Bertie will be of the greatest use.

1104
01:38:31.039 --> 01:38:34.800
He has far better taste than I. And he felt as though he

1105
01:38:34.840 --> 01:38:39.840
had spoken the words in spite of
himself, or had meant to say something

1106
01:38:39.920 --> 01:38:44.720
quite other than this compliment, but
could not help it. All the time

1107
01:38:44.760 --> 01:38:48.840
he was talking politics to Sir Archibald, his eyes rested on them, magnetically

1108
01:38:48.840 --> 01:38:55.159
attracted by their familiar manner. There
was a sisterly gentleness in Eva, an

1109
01:38:55.159 --> 01:39:00.000
emanation of sympathy for her lover's friend, a somewhat romantic interest in the missile

1110
01:39:00.239 --> 01:39:04.640
of Van Mehren's fine, dark eyes
and insinuating voice, had a compassion for

1111
01:39:04.680 --> 01:39:11.479
the deep byronic sorrows, which she
attributed to him something like the esthetic pathos

1112
01:39:11.479 --> 01:39:16.640
of a sentimental reader over the inexplicable
woes of a hero of romance. It

1113
01:39:16.800 --> 01:39:23.880
was to her a poetic friendship which
very harmoniously supplemented her love for frank Vestova,

1114
01:39:24.279 --> 01:39:28.680
a kind of love which, in
her girlish enthusiasm she had never imagined

1115
01:39:28.680 --> 01:39:31.920
the existence, and of which,
if she could have suspected it, she

1116
01:39:31.960 --> 01:39:38.439
would certainly never have thought herself capable. A calm, peaceful and true affection,

1117
01:39:38.960 --> 01:39:44.880
practical, almost homely, without the
faintest tinge of romance, a love

1118
01:39:45.319 --> 01:39:48.800
not blind to her lover's faults,
but faithful to him in spite of them,

1119
01:39:49.159 --> 01:39:55.600
like a mother's for her undeserving child. She perceived his indolence over every

1120
01:39:55.680 --> 01:40:00.560
voluntary effort, his indecision over every
serious question, his vacillation between this and

1121
01:40:00.600 --> 01:40:05.720
that, and did not blind herself
to all this weakness. But it was

1122
01:40:05.840 --> 01:40:11.640
this very weakness which had gained her
heart, as a pleasing contrast with the

1123
01:40:11.720 --> 01:40:16.239
cool, uneffusive sober affection of her
father, who spoiled her indeed, but

1124
01:40:16.319 --> 01:40:24.199
never so much as she herself desired. Then there was another contrast which charmed

1125
01:40:24.199 --> 01:40:28.439
her even more, which had filled
her heart with an admiration that had become

1126
01:40:28.479 --> 01:40:32.880
a passion. The contrast in Frank
himself, of his mild, yielding character,

1127
01:40:33.199 --> 01:40:39.399
with the robust vigor of his stalwart's
person. She woman, as she

1128
01:40:39.600 --> 01:40:43.960
was, found something adorable in the
fact of this splendidly strong youth, with

1129
01:40:44.079 --> 01:40:48.239
his broad chest and shoulders, his
great mane of fair hair and powerful neck,

1130
01:40:48.840 --> 01:40:55.119
this man, whose suppleness and ease
in lifting and moving things betrayed constant

1131
01:40:55.199 --> 01:41:00.199
practice and the use of his limbs, being so feeble in determination, so

1132
01:41:00.279 --> 01:41:03.920
gentle in demeanor. When she was
alone and thought of him, so she

1133
01:41:03.960 --> 01:41:09.800
could not help smiling, though the
tears came into her eyes, tears of

1134
01:41:09.840 --> 01:41:14.920
happiness, for this contrast made her
happy. It was very strange, she

1135
01:41:15.000 --> 01:41:17.600
thought, and she could not understand
it. It was a riddle, but

1136
01:41:17.720 --> 01:41:20.960
she did not try to solve it, for it was a riddle that she

1137
01:41:21.039 --> 01:41:25.920
loved. And as she thought of
it, with smiling lips and tear dimmed

1138
01:41:25.960 --> 01:41:31.600
eyes, she longed only to have
her arms round his neck her own Franks.

1139
01:41:32.880 --> 01:41:38.760
She did not idealize him. She
never now thought of platonic twin souls

1140
01:41:38.800 --> 01:41:43.760
in superhuman ecstasy. She took him
as he was a mere man, and

1141
01:41:43.880 --> 01:41:46.840
it was for what he was that
she worshiped him, calm and at rest

1142
01:41:46.880 --> 01:41:51.560
in her worship. Although she knew
that the romantic side of her nature could

1143
01:41:51.640 --> 01:41:57.319
never find fulfillment such as it now
did through her sisterly regard for Bertie,

1144
01:41:57.880 --> 01:42:00.960
she had no regret for it in
her abounding love for Frank. And since

1145
01:42:01.079 --> 01:42:05.680
nature found completion in the enjoyment of
the moment, she was pleased and quite

1146
01:42:05.720 --> 01:42:11.680
satisfied, and felt such a sunny
glow in her and about her as deserves

1147
01:42:11.720 --> 01:42:17.039
to be called true happiness. This
was her frame of mind now as she

1148
01:42:17.119 --> 01:42:23.840
looked through the patterns with Bertie while
Frank sat chatting with her father. There

1149
01:42:23.960 --> 01:42:28.279
was the man she loved, here, her brother friend. This was all

1150
01:42:28.279 --> 01:42:30.960
good. She never could wish for
anything more than to be thus happy in

1151
01:42:31.000 --> 01:42:35.960
her love and her friendship. She
looked at Bertie with a protecting and pitying

1152
01:42:36.039 --> 01:42:42.000
smile, and yet with a touch
of contempt at his slight, boyish figure,

1153
01:42:42.279 --> 01:42:45.600
his white hands, and diamond ring, his little feet in patent leather

1154
01:42:45.640 --> 01:42:51.079
shoes hardly larger than her own.
What a dapper little mannikin. He was

1155
01:42:51.680 --> 01:42:57.840
always spotlessly precise in dress and manner, with an appealing cloud of melancholy over

1156
01:42:57.880 --> 01:43:01.920
his whole person. As he glanced
up at her, consulting her about some

1157
01:43:02.079 --> 01:43:06.720
detail in one of the prints,
Bertie detected this smile on Eva's face,

1158
01:43:08.279 --> 01:43:14.000
ironically patronizing and at the same time
kind and sisterly, and knowing that she

1159
01:43:14.239 --> 01:43:18.119
liked him, He could to some
extent read its meaning. But he asked

1160
01:43:18.159 --> 01:43:23.199
her, what are you smiling at? At? Nothing, said she,

1161
01:43:23.800 --> 01:43:28.520
as she went on, still smiling
affectionately. Why did you never become an

1162
01:43:28.600 --> 01:43:33.359
artist? Bertie? An artist,
said Van Meren, What next? A

1163
01:43:33.439 --> 01:43:40.119
painter or an author? You have
great artistic taste, aye, he repeated,

1164
01:43:40.399 --> 01:43:44.800
much surprised, for he really did
not know that he possessed very remarkable

1165
01:43:45.000 --> 01:43:49.079
esthetic feeling, an exquisiteness of taste
worthy of a woman of a connoisseur.

1166
01:43:49.880 --> 01:43:55.560
And her words set his own character
before him in a new light. Does

1167
01:43:55.560 --> 01:44:00.680
a man never know himself and what
really lies in him? I could do

1168
01:44:00.800 --> 01:44:06.079
nothing, he replied, somewhat flattered
by Eva's speech, and in his astonishment,

1169
01:44:06.640 --> 01:44:11.359
candid for once, in spite of
himself, he went on, I

1170
01:44:11.399 --> 01:44:15.439
should be too lazy. He was
startled by his own words, as though

1171
01:44:15.439 --> 01:44:20.239
he had stripped himself bare, and
he instinctively looked across at Frank to see

1172
01:44:20.279 --> 01:44:26.279
if he had heard him. Vexed
at his own thoughtlessness, he colored and

1173
01:44:26.359 --> 01:44:30.399
laughed to hide his annoyance, while
she, still smiling, shook her head

1174
01:44:30.439 --> 01:44:40.319
reproachfully. Four. When a little
later Eva was alone with her lover and

1175
01:44:40.399 --> 01:44:45.600
she showed him the patterns which his
friend had preferred, Frank began Eva.

1176
01:44:45.279 --> 01:44:50.920
She looked at him inquiringly, beaming
with quiet happiness. There was a turmoil

1177
01:44:50.960 --> 01:44:56.119
in his brain. He wanted to
speak to her about Bertie, but he

1178
01:44:56.159 --> 01:45:01.159
suddenly remembered his promise to his friend
never to reveal anything of his past life.

1179
01:45:01.399 --> 01:45:05.600
Frank was a man who simply regarded
a spoken word as inviolable, and

1180
01:45:05.680 --> 01:45:10.239
he suddenly perceived that he could not
say what he had on his tongue.

1181
01:45:10.800 --> 01:45:16.000
And yet he remembered his uncomfortable sensations
when on the top of Mulderhoy Eva had

1182
01:45:16.000 --> 01:45:21.359
so innocently expressed her change of opinion
in his friend's favor. Had he not

1183
01:45:21.640 --> 01:45:26.880
then felt as though the black clouds
were an omen of evil hanging over her

1184
01:45:26.920 --> 01:45:30.239
head, And had he not experienced
the same shudder as he saw them sitting

1185
01:45:30.319 --> 01:45:33.960
side by side on the sofa,
as if a noose were ready to cast

1186
01:45:34.039 --> 01:45:41.479
round her neck. It was an
instinctive dread springing up unexpectedly, without anything

1187
01:45:41.520 --> 01:45:45.840
to lead up to it. Ought
he not to speak, to tell her

1188
01:45:45.920 --> 01:45:50.680
what Bertie was, but he had
promised, and it was foolishly superstitious to

1189
01:45:50.760 --> 01:45:57.680
allow such an unreasoning terror to have
any influence on his mind. Bertie was

1190
01:45:57.720 --> 01:46:01.399
not like ordinary men. He was
very late and lived too contentedly at the

1191
01:46:01.439 --> 01:46:06.239
expense of others. I think that
Veshova could not understand, and over which,

1192
01:46:06.279 --> 01:46:11.560
in his good nature he simply shook
his head with a smile. But

1193
01:46:11.720 --> 01:46:15.560
Bertie was not wicked. So he
was concealing nothing from Eva, but that

1194
01:46:15.680 --> 01:46:20.520
Bertie had no money. Still,
he meant to say something, Something was

1195
01:46:20.600 --> 01:46:26.840
seething in his brain. Eva was
looking at him wide eyed. He must

1196
01:46:26.880 --> 01:46:31.840
speak, So he went on,
embarrassed in spite of himself, coerced by

1197
01:46:31.840 --> 01:46:38.359
a mysterious force which seemed to dictate
the words. I was going to say.

1198
01:46:38.760 --> 01:46:41.960
Perhaps you will think me silly,
but I do not like. I

1199
01:46:42.000 --> 01:46:45.840
do not think it's right. She
still looked at him with her surprised eyes,

1200
01:46:46.399 --> 01:46:51.239
smiling at his hesitancy. It was
this very indecision which, in her

1201
01:46:51.319 --> 01:46:57.520
eyes, was so engaging a contrast
to his stalwart's frame. She sat down

1202
01:46:57.560 --> 01:47:00.600
on his knee, leaning against him, and her voice sounded like a poem

1203
01:47:00.600 --> 01:47:05.319
of love. Well, what,
Frank, my dearest Frank, what is

1204
01:47:05.359 --> 01:47:12.119
it? Her eyes smiled in his. She laid her arms round his neck,

1205
01:47:12.319 --> 01:47:15.840
clasping her hands, and again she
asked, tell me, foolish boy,

1206
01:47:16.239 --> 01:47:20.640
what is the matter? I do
not like to see you always that

1207
01:47:20.760 --> 01:47:27.720
you should always sit so with Bertie. The words forced their way against his

1208
01:47:27.840 --> 01:47:30.159
will, and now that they were
spoken, it seemed to him that he

1209
01:47:30.199 --> 01:47:36.720
had meant to say something quite different. Eva was amazed. Sit so with

1210
01:47:36.840 --> 01:47:42.640
Bertie? She repeated, how do
I sit with Bertie? Have I done

1211
01:47:42.720 --> 01:47:45.079
anything I ought not? Or?
Tell me, Frank, are you so

1212
01:47:45.199 --> 01:47:50.520
horribly jealous? He clasped her closer
and kissing her hair, He muttered,

1213
01:47:50.960 --> 01:47:56.640
yes, yes I am jealous,
but of Bertie, your best friend who

1214
01:47:56.640 --> 01:48:00.520
lives with you. You cannot surely
be jealous of him. She burst out,

1215
01:48:00.600 --> 01:48:04.600
laughing, and carried away by her
own mirth, fairly shook as she

1216
01:48:04.680 --> 01:48:10.760
sat there on his knee, with
her head against his shoulder. Ah,

1217
01:48:10.800 --> 01:48:15.439
Bertie, she said, still gasping. How is it possible, Oh,

1218
01:48:15.760 --> 01:48:18.439
oh, of Bertie. But I
only think of him as a pretty boy,

1219
01:48:18.720 --> 01:48:24.640
almost a girl. He is so
tiny and has such neat little hands.

1220
01:48:25.079 --> 01:48:30.039
Oh, oh, what jealous of
Bertie? Do not laugh? So,

1221
01:48:30.640 --> 01:48:32.600
he said, with a frown.
I really mean it. You are

1222
01:48:32.640 --> 01:48:38.880
so familiar with him, But he
is your dearest friend. Yes, so

1223
01:48:39.000 --> 01:48:43.720
he may be. But yet she
began again to laugh. She thought him

1224
01:48:43.720 --> 01:48:46.439
most amusing, and at the same
time she loved him all the better for

1225
01:48:46.520 --> 01:48:53.159
being so sullen and jealous. Silly
fellow, she said, and her fingers

1226
01:48:53.199 --> 01:48:58.520
played with his fair, gold tinted
mustache. How foolish, oh, how

1227
01:48:58.600 --> 01:49:02.920
foolish you are. But promise me, he began again. Of course,

1228
01:49:03.399 --> 01:49:06.760
if it will make your mind easy, I shall keep more at a distance.

1229
01:49:08.119 --> 01:49:11.279
But I shall find it very difficult, for I am so accustomed to

1230
01:49:11.319 --> 01:49:15.640
Bertie, and Bertie must not be
allowed to guess it. Thus your friendship

1231
01:49:15.680 --> 01:49:19.399
will remain unbroken. I must still
be good friends with him. No,

1232
01:49:19.399 --> 01:49:24.000
no, I tell you, I
must be kind to him. Foolish boy

1233
01:49:24.039 --> 01:49:27.479
that you are. I never knew
that you could be so silly. And

1234
01:49:27.560 --> 01:49:31.760
she laughed again, very heartily,
shaking his head in her engaging merriment and

1235
01:49:31.880 --> 01:49:41.279
touzling his thick hair with her two
little hands. Five. Frank had of

1236
01:49:41.359 --> 01:49:45.880
late begun to think of Bertie as
an intolerable burthen, though he himself did

1237
01:49:45.880 --> 01:49:50.279
not understand why he could not bear
to see Eva and his friend together,

1238
01:49:50.880 --> 01:49:57.319
and their intimacy brought this about almost
every day. Eva had rightly perceived that

1239
01:49:57.399 --> 01:50:01.960
she could hardly behave to Bertie otherwise
than she had done hitherto. Meanwhile,

1240
01:50:02.359 --> 01:50:08.600
he had to put up with great
coolness from Frank after one of his escapades,

1241
01:50:08.760 --> 01:50:14.720
which had lasted three days. This
coolness was very conspicuous. Vestova,

1242
01:50:15.079 --> 01:50:19.239
who usually made very pressing inquiries on
his return from these mysterious absences, on

1243
01:50:19.319 --> 01:50:25.600
this occasion, said not a word, and Bertie vowed to himself that this

1244
01:50:25.640 --> 01:50:30.199
should be the last of these disappearances. But then came the discussion which Van

1245
01:50:30.239 --> 01:50:35.840
Mehren had so greatly dreaded. In
a confidential moment, his friend spoke of

1246
01:50:35.880 --> 01:50:42.279
his impending marriage and asked Bertie what
plans he had for the future. For

1247
01:50:42.399 --> 01:50:45.479
you know, dear old fellow,
was Frank's kind way of putting it,

1248
01:50:45.920 --> 01:50:48.439
that I will, with pleasure do
my best to help you here or in

1249
01:50:48.479 --> 01:50:53.079
Holland. I have a few connections, and so long as you have nothing,

1250
01:50:53.479 --> 01:50:56.479
of course, I shall not leave
you out in the cold on that

1251
01:50:56.600 --> 01:51:00.880
you may safely reckon. But I
shall be leaving Whitrose Cottage. Eva thinks

1252
01:51:00.880 --> 01:51:04.560
it too much out of the way, and as you know, prefers Kensington.

1253
01:51:04.960 --> 01:51:09.439
But we have had good times together, haven't we. And he clapped

1254
01:51:09.479 --> 01:51:14.119
Bertie on the shoulder, grateful for
the life of good fellowship they had enjoyed

1255
01:51:14.159 --> 01:51:18.000
within those walls, and feeling a
little compassion for the poor youth who took

1256
01:51:18.119 --> 01:51:24.079
so kindly to the good gifts of
wealth, and who had alas no wealth

1257
01:51:24.199 --> 01:51:29.840
to procure them with. However,
he penetrated no further into Bertie's state of

1258
01:51:29.920 --> 01:51:34.399
mind, and had always had a
turn for a bohemian existence. He had

1259
01:51:34.439 --> 01:51:39.960
known luxury after living in misery.
Now life must be a little less easy

1260
01:51:40.000 --> 01:51:45.840
for him again, that was all
Bertie, on his part, horrified by

1261
01:51:45.840 --> 01:51:51.560
the heartless villainy of his first reflections, allowed himself to slide on day by

1262
01:51:51.640 --> 01:51:58.439
day with no further thought of his
various plots. He sometimes even had a

1263
01:51:58.520 --> 01:52:03.439
naive belief the last moment, fortune
would look on him with favor. His

1264
01:52:03.600 --> 01:52:12.239
fatalism was like a form of worship, giving him strength and hope. Six.

1265
01:52:13.520 --> 01:52:17.000
However, a moment came when he
thought all hope lost. The danger

1266
01:52:17.119 --> 01:52:23.359
was pressing an imminent Bertie, said
Vestova, who had just come home in

1267
01:52:23.439 --> 01:52:28.000
some excitement. Tomorrow you can find
some employment to suit you. I think

1268
01:52:28.920 --> 01:52:31.479
tail You know, our friend at
the club tells me that he wants to

1269
01:52:31.479 --> 01:52:35.640
find a secretary for his father,
Lord Tail. The old man lives on

1270
01:52:35.720 --> 01:52:42.319
his place up in Northumberland. He's
always ailing and sometimes tiresome. Still,

1271
01:52:42.760 --> 01:52:45.600
it seems to me that you will
not easily get such another chance. You

1272
01:52:45.600 --> 01:52:48.680
will have a salary of eighty pounds
and live in the house. Of course,

1273
01:52:49.479 --> 01:52:53.560
I should have spoken of you to
Tailor at once, but that you

1274
01:52:53.640 --> 01:52:58.399
begged me long ago. Then you
did not mention my name, said Bertie

1275
01:52:58.600 --> 01:53:03.479
hastily, and almost a no,
replied Frank, surprised at his tone,

1276
01:53:03.960 --> 01:53:08.279
I could make no overtures till I
had spoken to you, But to make

1277
01:53:08.399 --> 01:53:11.560
up your mind at once. The
Tail has two other men in his eye

1278
01:53:11.600 --> 01:53:15.119
already. If you can decide at
once, I will go back to Tail

1279
01:53:15.199 --> 01:53:17.880
this minute. My cab is waiting. And he took up his hat.

1280
01:53:19.079 --> 01:53:26.039
Eighty pounds and a position as secretary
with three quarters at the castle. How

1281
01:53:26.079 --> 01:53:30.199
the splendor of such an offer would
have dazzled Bertie not so very long since

1282
01:53:30.680 --> 01:53:35.279
in America. But now, my
dear Frank, he said, very coldly,

1283
01:53:35.920 --> 01:53:41.439
I am much obliged for your kind
intentions, but pray take no trouble

1284
01:53:41.479 --> 01:53:45.600
on my account. I cannot accept
the place. Dismiss your cab. What

1285
01:53:46.319 --> 01:53:50.760
cried his friend in utter amazement.
Will you not at least think it over?

1286
01:53:51.359 --> 01:53:55.560
Thank you very much. If you
have nothing better to offer me than

1287
01:53:55.600 --> 01:53:58.920
to become the servant of the father
of a man with whom I have been

1288
01:53:58.960 --> 01:54:02.800
intimate as an equal, I can
only say thank you for nothing. I'm

1289
01:54:02.840 --> 01:54:08.239
not going to shut myself up in
a country house and scribble for an ailing,

1290
01:54:08.399 --> 01:54:12.800
fractious old man for a pittance of
eighty pounds a year. And what

1291
01:54:12.920 --> 01:54:15.560
would Tale think of me? He
has always known me as your friend,

1292
01:54:16.000 --> 01:54:19.920
and we have been familiar on that
footaying, and now he is to see

1293
01:54:19.960 --> 01:54:25.800
me his father's hired menial. I
cannot say that you have much delicate feeling,

1294
01:54:25.840 --> 01:54:30.760
Frank. His brain was in a
whirl while he spoke. Never before

1295
01:54:30.800 --> 01:54:34.279
had he assumed such a haughty tone
in addressing Frank, But it was like

1296
01:54:34.319 --> 01:54:40.880
a cry of despair rising up from
the ruins of his false pride. But

1297
01:54:41.119 --> 01:54:45.960
good god man, what do you
expect, exclaimed Vesthova. You know all

1298
01:54:45.000 --> 01:54:48.359
my friends, and it is only
through my friends that I can hope to

1299
01:54:48.439 --> 01:54:53.600
help you. I will take no
help from anyone like the men of our

1300
01:54:53.600 --> 01:54:57.600
own club, nor from any one
to whom you have introduced me as their

1301
01:54:57.640 --> 01:55:01.560
equal. That's certainly, it makes
the case a difficult one, said Veshova

1302
01:55:01.800 --> 01:55:05.960
with a sharp laugh, for great
wrath was rising up in him. Then

1303
01:55:06.000 --> 01:55:11.199
you have nothing to say to this, nothing, But what on earth do

1304
01:55:11.239 --> 01:55:15.920
you want, said Frank indignantly for
the moment? Nothing for the moment,

1305
01:55:16.079 --> 01:55:20.319
well and good, But by and
by that I will see all in good

1306
01:55:20.399 --> 01:55:27.000
time. And if you cannot be
more considerate, he stopped short, startled

1307
01:55:27.000 --> 01:55:30.279
by his own voice. He was
speaking loudly, as it would seem with

1308
01:55:30.359 --> 01:55:36.239
domineering vehemence, but in fact only
with the energy of despairing indolence and pride.

1309
01:55:36.239 --> 01:55:41.439
At bay. The two men looked
at each other for a few seconds,

1310
01:55:42.079 --> 01:55:45.560
and each suddenly feeling as though he
had a store of buried grievances against

1311
01:55:45.560 --> 01:55:50.680
the other, grievances which had accumulated
in spite of the friendly intimacy of their

1312
01:55:50.720 --> 01:55:55.640
lives, and which they were on
the point now were flinging in each other's

1313
01:55:55.680 --> 01:56:00.359
teeth as foul insults. But Van
mer And checked his out first. He

1314
01:56:00.439 --> 01:56:05.880
recollected himself, or he had not
forgotten himself. He smiled and held out

1315
01:56:05.880 --> 01:56:11.279
his hand. Forgive me, Frank, he said, humbly, with that

1316
01:56:11.479 --> 01:56:15.600
voice like beat and gold, and
that mitigating smile. I know you,

1317
01:56:15.680 --> 01:56:19.920
bent well. I can never,
no, never repay you for all you

1318
01:56:20.000 --> 01:56:25.560
have done for me, But this
place I cannot really accept. I would

1319
01:56:25.640 --> 01:56:29.439
rather be a waiter or the conductor
of a tram car. Forgive me if

1320
01:56:29.439 --> 01:56:34.079
I seem ungrateful. So they made
it up. But vesover thought this pride

1321
01:56:34.119 --> 01:56:40.000
on his companion's part ridiculous, and
was vexed that the whole affair must remain

1322
01:56:40.039 --> 01:56:44.520
a secret from Eva. He would
have liked to consult her on the subject.

1323
01:56:44.760 --> 01:56:47.840
And it was with a deeper frown
and more scowling glance that he watched

1324
01:56:47.880 --> 01:56:53.560
those two Bertie and Eva, as
they sat side by side in the evening,

1325
01:56:54.079 --> 01:56:58.159
in the subdued light of the blue
shaded lamp, chatting like brother and

1326
01:56:58.239 --> 01:57:03.039
sister, like some covered dishonesty.
It was all he could do to keep

1327
01:57:03.079 --> 01:57:09.800
from proclaiming aloud that Bertie was a
parasite, a low fellow, from tearing

1328
01:57:09.840 --> 01:57:15.840
them apart from snatching them away from
their blissful, smiling and guileless intimacy as

1329
01:57:15.880 --> 01:57:29.880
they discussed furniture and hangings. End
of section three, Section four of Footsteps

1330
01:57:29.880 --> 01:57:34.760
of Fate by Luis Kuperus. This
LibriVox recording is in the public domain,

1331
01:57:36.920 --> 01:57:45.479
Part three seven to ten seven.
After this ineffectual attempt to help Vanameron,

1332
01:57:45.920 --> 01:57:50.520
his friend took no further trouble,
expecting that when the case became urgent,

1333
01:57:51.000 --> 01:57:58.199
Bertie himself would ask his assistance.
But Bertie's refusal led Frank to perceive for

1334
01:57:58.239 --> 01:58:01.119
the first time the false pers position
in which he had placed his companion,

1335
01:58:01.479 --> 01:58:08.000
both with regard to himself and to
his associates. His kindness to a friend

1336
01:58:08.039 --> 01:58:11.399
out of luck in allowing him to
live for a year as a man of

1337
01:58:11.439 --> 01:58:15.199
fortune. Struck him, now seen
in the light of an attachment which had

1338
01:58:15.199 --> 01:58:21.640
purified, renovated, and transformed his
whole nature, as indescribably preposterous, as

1339
01:58:21.720 --> 01:58:27.840
trampling on every law of honor and
veracity, and unjustifiable mockery of the good

1340
01:58:27.920 --> 01:58:31.399
faith of the world he lived in. Formerly, he had thought all this

1341
01:58:31.680 --> 01:58:35.920
very amusing, But now he felt
that it was mean to have enjoyed such

1342
01:58:36.000 --> 01:58:42.960
amusement as this had he understood that
he had himself encouraged the growth as of

1343
01:58:43.000 --> 01:58:47.800
some poisonous weed of Van Mahden's false
pride, which now forbade him to accept

1344
01:58:47.800 --> 01:58:54.199
a favor from any one of their
boon companions. The days glided by,

1345
01:58:54.720 --> 01:58:59.760
and Vestova could not shake off the
sense of self reproach, which indeed grew

1346
01:58:59.840 --> 01:59:03.199
up on him. As time went
on. Van Maheron cast a shadow over

1347
01:59:03.239 --> 01:59:08.960
the happiness of his love. Eva
saw that some dull grief made him silent.

1348
01:59:09.760 --> 01:59:13.840
He would sit brooding for many minutes
at a time, his brows knit,

1349
01:59:14.359 --> 01:59:19.000
and a deep furrow across his forehead. What ails you, frank nothing,

1350
01:59:19.039 --> 01:59:24.920
my darling, Are you still jealous. No, I will cure myself

1351
01:59:24.960 --> 01:59:28.800
of it. Well, you see, it is your own fault. If

1352
01:59:28.840 --> 01:59:31.760
you had not always sang the praises
of Bertie as your best friend, I

1353
01:59:31.760 --> 01:59:36.560
should never have become so intimate with
him. Yes, it was his own

1354
01:59:36.600 --> 01:59:43.000
fault that he saw very clearly.
And are you satisfied with me now?

1355
01:59:43.399 --> 01:59:47.359
She asked, laughing. He too
laughed, for indeed it was true.

1356
01:59:47.800 --> 01:59:53.640
For Frank's sake, she had now
suddenly changed her behavior to Bertie. She

1357
01:59:53.680 --> 01:59:57.399
would rise and quit the sofa where
they sat while he was yet speaking.

1358
01:59:58.479 --> 02:00:02.840
She sometimes contradicted him, reproached him
for his foppishness, and laughed at him

1359
02:00:02.880 --> 02:00:09.159
for his dainty little hands. He
looked at her in amazement, fancied she

1360
02:00:09.239 --> 02:00:14.560
meant it for flirtation, but could
not understand what she would be at one

1361
02:00:14.640 --> 02:00:18.800
evening. For hour after hour,
she pestered him with petty annoyances pinpricks,

1362
02:00:19.239 --> 02:00:26.439
which she intended should reassure Frank and
not wound Bertie too deeply. The conversation

1363
02:00:26.640 --> 02:00:30.039
presently turned on heraldry, and Sir
Archibald wanted to show the two men the

1364
02:00:30.039 --> 02:00:35.439
blazoned roll of his family tree.
Frank rose, ready to follow him to

1365
02:00:35.479 --> 02:00:41.079
his study, and Bertie did the
same. Eva felt a little compunction,

1366
02:00:41.640 --> 02:00:45.560
thinking she had carried her teasing rather
far this time, and she knew that

1367
02:00:45.640 --> 02:00:49.560
her father's pedigree would not interest him
in the least. Leave Bertie here,

1368
02:00:49.600 --> 02:00:55.800
Papa, said she he knows nothing
about heraldry, And at the same time,

1369
02:00:55.920 --> 02:01:00.760
to comfort Frank, who dared not
betray his jealousy, she added lightly,

1370
02:01:00.000 --> 02:01:04.800
with a mollifying twinkle of her long
eyelashes, Frank will trust us alone

1371
02:01:04.800 --> 02:01:10.479
together, I dare say. Her
voice was so simple, her glance so

1372
02:01:10.600 --> 02:01:15.000
loving, that Frank smiled and nodded
trustfully, though annoyed at seeing Bertie sit

1373
02:01:15.079 --> 02:01:20.199
down again. As soon as they
were alone, Bertie began for shame ether,

1374
02:01:20.720 --> 02:01:25.800
how could you torment me as you
have been doing. She laughed and

1375
02:01:25.920 --> 02:01:29.680
blushed, a little, ashamed of
herself for treating him so to please Frank.

1376
02:01:30.880 --> 02:01:34.520
But Bertie's face was grave, and
with an appealing gesture, he folded

1377
02:01:34.520 --> 02:01:39.520
his hands and said, beseechingly,
promise me that you will not do so

1378
02:01:39.640 --> 02:01:45.680
again. She gazed at him in
surprise at his earnest tone. It's only

1379
02:01:45.720 --> 02:01:49.279
by fun, said she, but
a form of fun which is suffering to

1380
02:01:49.319 --> 02:01:55.239
me, he replied in a low
voice, and still she looked at him,

1381
02:01:55.279 --> 02:02:00.000
not understanding. He sat huddled up, his head on his breast,

1382
02:02:00.479 --> 02:02:03.760
his eyes fixed before him, and
his brown hair, which waved a little

1383
02:02:03.800 --> 02:02:09.399
over his forehead, clinging to his
temples, which were damp with perspiration.

1384
02:02:10.640 --> 02:02:15.199
He was evidently much agitated. He
had no idea what might come of this

1385
02:02:15.319 --> 02:02:18.520
dialogue, but he was aware that
his tone had been solemn, that these

1386
02:02:18.560 --> 02:02:24.960
first words might be the prelude to
a very important interview. He felt that

1387
02:02:25.000 --> 02:02:28.520
these few minutes were destined to become
a precious link in the chain of his

1388
02:02:28.640 --> 02:02:32.119
life, and he waited with the
patience of a fatalist, for the thoughts

1389
02:02:32.119 --> 02:02:36.199
which should take shape in his brain
and the words which should rise to his

1390
02:02:36.319 --> 02:02:41.399
lips. He kept an eye on
himself, as it were, and at

1391
02:02:41.399 --> 02:02:45.319
the same time spun a web about
Eva. As a spider entangles a fly

1392
02:02:45.960 --> 02:02:50.359
in the thread, it draws out
of its bowels. You see, he

1393
02:02:50.439 --> 02:02:55.680
went on slowly. I cannot bear
that you should torment me, so you

1394
02:02:55.760 --> 02:02:59.119
think less well of me than you
used. But if I have little hands,

1395
02:02:59.479 --> 02:03:03.239
I cannot help it. She could
not forbear a smile at the intentionally

1396
02:03:03.279 --> 02:03:09.640
coquettish tone. He had assumed an
affectation of spoilt childishness, which she saw

1397
02:03:09.760 --> 02:03:15.000
through at once, But she replied
nevertheless, well, I beg your pardon

1398
02:03:15.039 --> 02:03:18.159
for teasing you. I will not
do so again. He, however,

1399
02:03:18.359 --> 02:03:21.920
had risen from his chair, and, pretending not to see the hand she

1400
02:03:23.000 --> 02:03:27.560
held out, he silently went to
the window and stood there, looking out

1401
02:03:27.600 --> 02:03:33.159
on the parklike greenery of Kensington Gardens, dimmed with mist. She sat still,

1402
02:03:33.600 --> 02:03:39.199
waiting for him to speak, but
he said nothing, Are you angry,

1403
02:03:39.239 --> 02:03:45.000
Bertie? Then he slowly turned round. The gray daylight fell through the

1404
02:03:45.079 --> 02:03:49.199
muslin curtains and gave a pallid look, a hue of Parian china to his

1405
02:03:49.279 --> 02:03:56.119
delicate features. Very gently, with
a deep, melancholy smile, he shook

1406
02:03:56.159 --> 02:04:00.600
his head in negation, and to
her romantic fancy, the madness of that

1407
02:04:00.760 --> 02:04:04.279
smile gave him a poetic interest,
as of a youthful god or a fallen

1408
02:04:04.319 --> 02:04:11.000
angel, the celestial softness of a
sexless mythological being, such as she had

1409
02:04:11.039 --> 02:04:15.279
seen in illustrated books of verse,
a man in form a woman in face.

1410
02:04:15.880 --> 02:04:19.399
She longed to invite him to pour
out his woes, and at this

1411
02:04:19.600 --> 02:04:24.960
moment. It would scarcely have surprised
her if his speech had sounded like a

1412
02:04:25.000 --> 02:04:30.880
rhythmical monologue, a long lament in
blank verse. Bertie, my dear fellow,

1413
02:04:30.199 --> 02:04:35.640
what is the matter? There he
stood speechless in the pale, slanting

1414
02:04:35.760 --> 02:04:42.079
light, knowing that the effects must
be almost theatrical, and she, sitting

1415
02:04:42.119 --> 02:04:46.479
where it was darker, could see
that his eyes glistened through tears. Much

1416
02:04:46.560 --> 02:04:50.279
moved, she went up to him. She took his hand and made him

1417
02:04:50.319 --> 02:04:55.840
sit down by her side. Speak, Bertie, have I vexed you?

1418
02:04:56.239 --> 02:05:00.000
Can you not tell me? But
again he shook his head with that face

1419
02:05:00.239 --> 02:05:03.840
smile, and at last he said, huskily, no, Eva, I'm

1420
02:05:03.840 --> 02:05:09.279
not vexed. I can be vexed
no more. But I am very very

1421
02:05:09.399 --> 02:05:13.640
sad because we must so soon part, and I care for you so much

1422
02:05:14.920 --> 02:05:19.520
part. Why where are you going? Indeed? I do not myself know

1423
02:05:19.640 --> 02:05:24.880
that, sweet girl. I shall
remain till you are married, and then

1424
02:05:24.920 --> 02:05:29.880
I must go to wander hither and
thither quite alone. Will you sometimes think

1425
02:05:29.920 --> 02:05:32.159
of me? I wonder? But
why do you not stay in London?

1426
02:05:33.239 --> 02:05:38.560
He looked at her. He had
begun this conversation without knowing whither it might

1427
02:05:38.680 --> 02:05:43.880
lead him abandoning himself to chance.
But now with this luke which her eyes

1428
02:05:43.960 --> 02:05:47.560
met in response, there suddenly blazed
up in him a little diabolical flame.

1429
02:05:48.680 --> 02:05:54.439
He knew now what he was driving
at. He weighed every word he uttered

1430
02:05:54.720 --> 02:05:59.399
as if they were grains of gold. He felt himself very lucid, very

1431
02:05:59.439 --> 02:06:04.039
logical, calm, free from the
painful incoherence agitation of the last few minutes.

1432
02:06:04.800 --> 02:06:10.000
And he spoke very slowly, in
a mournful, hollow voice, like

1433
02:06:10.039 --> 02:06:15.720
a sick man in London. No, Eva, I cannot remain here,

1434
02:06:15.520 --> 02:06:20.560
Why not? I cannot, dear
girl, I cannot, not with any

1435
02:06:20.600 --> 02:06:27.159
decency. It is impossible. The
hypocrisy of his eye, the languor of

1436
02:06:27.159 --> 02:06:31.560
his tone, his assumption of inconsolable
grief, distilled into her mind a vague

1437
02:06:31.600 --> 02:06:36.800
suspicion, like an insidious poison,
the suspicion that it was on her accounts

1438
02:06:36.800 --> 02:06:41.680
that he could not remain in London
because he would have to meet her as

1439
02:06:41.720 --> 02:06:46.720
his friend's wife. It was no
more than a suggestion. The wordless despair

1440
02:06:46.760 --> 02:06:53.000
which seemed to exhale from him inspired
the inference, but her mind rebelled against

1441
02:06:53.039 --> 02:06:58.560
it. It was a mere suspicion
and groundless. He went on, still

1442
02:06:58.680 --> 02:07:04.000
very slowly, becausensidering every word as
if with mathematical accuracy. And when I

1443
02:07:04.039 --> 02:07:09.119
am gone and you are left with
Frank, always with him, will you

1444
02:07:09.199 --> 02:07:14.600
be happy? Eva? Why Bertie? She paused, It would be almost

1445
02:07:14.720 --> 02:07:18.039
cruel to say yes in the security
of her happiness in the face of his

1446
02:07:18.199 --> 02:07:25.159
pain. Why do you ask,
she said, almost timidly. He gazed

1447
02:07:25.199 --> 02:07:29.319
into her face with the deep,
soft, misty blackness of his fine eyes.

1448
02:07:30.239 --> 02:07:33.239
Then he bent his head and they
filled with tears, and he clutched

1449
02:07:33.279 --> 02:07:42.039
his hands as if they were cold. Why why, Eva insisted nothing nothing,

1450
02:07:42.479 --> 02:07:45.600
Promise me that you will be happy, For if you were not happy,

1451
02:07:45.920 --> 02:07:49.359
I should be heartbroken. What should
hinder my being happy? I love

1452
02:07:49.399 --> 02:07:55.520
Frank so dearly, she exclaimed,
though still fearing lest she should hurt his

1453
02:07:55.600 --> 02:08:00.520
feelings. Yes, and so long
as you are happy, all is well,

1454
02:08:01.000 --> 02:08:05.800
he murmured, low, still rubbing
his hands. Then, on a

1455
02:08:05.800 --> 02:08:09.560
sudden while her inquiring gaze still rested
on his face, he said, poor

1456
02:08:09.680 --> 02:08:16.720
child. What why poor child?
She asked in dismay. He seized her

1457
02:08:16.760 --> 02:08:22.960
hands, his tears dropped on her
fingers. Oh, Eva, Eva,

1458
02:08:24.039 --> 02:08:28.119
God, who can read my heart? If you, Oh, I feel

1459
02:08:28.199 --> 02:08:33.920
such pity, such great passionate pity
for you. I would do I know

1460
02:08:33.039 --> 02:08:37.920
not what I would give my life
if I if you, poor poor child.

1461
02:08:39.079 --> 02:08:43.880
She was standing up now, trembling
and as pale as death. Her

1462
02:08:43.880 --> 02:08:48.760
fingers clutched the table cover, which
slipped as she pulled it, and a

1463
02:08:48.800 --> 02:08:54.720
glass vase in which a few flowers
were fading was upset. The water trickled

1464
02:08:54.760 --> 02:08:58.960
over the velvets cloth in great silvery
beads. She let it flow into pool,

1465
02:09:00.720 --> 02:09:05.199
staring at it with wide, terrified
eyes, while he covered his face

1466
02:09:05.279 --> 02:09:09.560
with his hands. Bertie, she
cried, oh, Bertie, why do

1467
02:09:09.600 --> 02:09:15.000
you speak thus? What is it
all? Tell me, tell me everything

1468
02:09:15.479 --> 02:09:20.520
I must know. I desire you
to speak out. His reply was a

1469
02:09:20.560 --> 02:09:26.079
gesture, a perfectly natural gesture of
deprecation, with no touch of theatrical insincerity,

1470
02:09:26.560 --> 02:09:31.600
a gesture as though he would retract
his words and had said something he

1471
02:09:31.640 --> 02:09:35.279
should have kept to himself. Then
he too rose, and his face had

1472
02:09:35.359 --> 02:09:41.159
changed. His expression was no longer
one of suffering or pity, but of

1473
02:09:41.239 --> 02:09:46.560
cool decision. No, no,
there is nothing to tell eva, nothing,

1474
02:09:46.960 --> 02:09:52.039
And you could exclaim, poor child, And you pity me, Good

1475
02:09:52.119 --> 02:09:56.560
God, but why what is this? What evil threatens me? She had

1476
02:09:56.640 --> 02:10:01.319
Frank's name on her lips, but
dared not utter it. And he was

1477
02:10:01.439 --> 02:10:05.800
conscious of this. Nothing, really
and truly nothing. Dear Eva, I

1478
02:10:05.880 --> 02:10:11.880
assure you nothing. I sometimes have
the most foolish thoughts, mere fancies.

1479
02:10:11.399 --> 02:10:16.760
Look, the vase has fallen over. But what were you thinking? Then?

1480
02:10:16.039 --> 02:10:22.520
What fancies? He wiped the water
off the tablecloth with his pocket's handkerchief

1481
02:10:22.920 --> 02:10:28.079
and replaced the flowers in the glass. Nothing, nothing at all, he

1482
02:10:28.199 --> 02:10:33.640
murmured huskily. He was tremulous with
nervousness, and his tone was deeply compassionate,

1483
02:10:35.079 --> 02:10:39.840
as if his words were meant to
shroud some awful secret. Then,

1484
02:10:39.000 --> 02:10:43.600
as he said no more, she
sank on the sofa and broke into uncontrolled

1485
02:10:43.640 --> 02:10:48.960
and passionate sobs, scared by the
undefinable terror which rose up in her soul.

1486
02:10:50.239 --> 02:10:56.199
Eva, dear Eva, be calm, he entreated her, fearing lest

1487
02:10:56.239 --> 02:11:01.000
someone should come into the room,
And then then he knelt down close by

1488
02:11:01.079 --> 02:11:05.119
her, taking her hands and pressing
them tenderly. Look at me, Eva,

1489
02:11:05.479 --> 02:11:09.920
I assure you, I swear to
you there is nothing wrong, nothing

1490
02:11:09.960 --> 02:11:13.359
at all. But what exists in
my own imagination. But you see,

1491
02:11:13.640 --> 02:11:16.720
I care for you so fondly.
You will let me say so, won't

1492
02:11:16.760 --> 02:11:22.439
you? For what I feel for
you is only guileless devoted friendship for my

1493
02:11:22.520 --> 02:11:26.680
friend's bride and my own little sister. I love you so truly that I

1494
02:11:26.720 --> 02:11:31.279
cannot help asking myself, will my
dear Eva be happy? It is a

1495
02:11:31.319 --> 02:11:35.720
foolish thought, no doubt, But
in me it is not strange, because

1496
02:11:35.760 --> 02:11:39.520
I am always thinking of those I
love. You. See, I have

1497
02:11:39.680 --> 02:11:45.039
known so much sorrow and suffering that
when I see anyone I care for so

1498
02:11:45.159 --> 02:11:48.640
truly as I do for you,
see her so full of confidence in life

1499
02:11:50.039 --> 02:11:54.359
and of fair illusions, the thought
comes over me, terrible but irresistible,

1500
02:11:54.760 --> 02:12:00.159
will she be happy? Is there
indeed any such thing as happiness? Us?

1501
02:12:01.039 --> 02:12:03.279
Oh? I ought not to say
such things. I only darken your

1502
02:12:03.279 --> 02:12:09.720
outlook and give you pessimistic notions.
But sometimes when I see you with Frank,

1503
02:12:09.159 --> 02:12:13.840
my heart is so full. For
I love Frank too. I owe

1504
02:12:13.880 --> 02:12:16.439
so much to him, and I
should so gladly see him happy with some

1505
02:12:16.600 --> 02:12:22.399
woman with someone. Still, I
can only say, trust wholly in Frank.

1506
02:12:22.880 --> 02:12:26.760
He loves you, Though he is
a little fickle, a little capricious

1507
02:12:26.760 --> 02:12:31.840
in his feelings, but he adores
you. The delicate shades of a woman's

1508
02:12:31.960 --> 02:12:35.960
nature are above his comprehension, perhaps, and he is apt to carry his

1509
02:12:37.079 --> 02:12:41.079
light heartedness a little too far.
Still, he means no harm. He

1510
02:12:41.159 --> 02:12:46.560
is so candid, so honest,
You know, always so exactly what he

1511
02:12:46.640 --> 02:12:52.239
is at. And so, Eva, dear Eva, never let any misunderstanding

1512
02:12:52.319 --> 02:12:54.960
come between you. Always be open
with each other, will you not,

1513
02:12:56.199 --> 02:13:01.880
my child? Oh, my poor
Eva. And he two sobbed low in

1514
02:13:01.000 --> 02:13:05.920
his mysterious anguish, which was not
altogether a pretense, for he was really

1515
02:13:05.960 --> 02:13:11.920
in despair at the prospects before him. She looked down on him in dismay,

1516
02:13:11.359 --> 02:13:16.039
greatly distressed by his words, from
which she inferred something which he would

1517
02:13:16.039 --> 02:13:22.079
not reveal, each word a drop
of subtle venom, and the germ of

1518
02:13:22.159 --> 02:13:28.479
strange doubts which shot up like poisonous
weeds. Then there is nothing to tell,

1519
02:13:28.960 --> 02:13:33.319
she said once more, in a
weary tone of entreaty, clasping her

1520
02:13:33.359 --> 02:13:37.479
hands. No, dear Eva,
nothing at all. Only I am worn

1521
02:13:37.520 --> 02:13:41.319
out, you see, quite an
old man, And so I worry myself

1522
02:13:41.399 --> 02:13:46.600
sometimes about you two, when how
far away, far from London. Will

1523
02:13:46.640 --> 02:13:50.359
you be happy? Tell me,
Eva, will you be happy? Promise

1524
02:13:50.399 --> 02:13:56.279
me, swear to me that you
will. She gently nodded in the affirmative,

1525
02:13:56.520 --> 02:14:00.600
with a sigh of regrets that he
must leave London, regrets for what

1526
02:14:00.720 --> 02:14:03.399
he had suggested, worst of all, for what he had left, and

1527
02:14:03.560 --> 02:14:09.359
said, the mystery, the terror. He meanwhile had risen, holding out

1528
02:14:09.439 --> 02:14:13.760
his hands to her and shaking his
head as though over the follies of man.

1529
02:14:15.199 --> 02:14:18.479
He said, with his most pathetic
smile, How silly you must think

1530
02:14:18.560 --> 02:14:22.840
me to torment myself so about nothing. I ought not to have said so

1531
02:14:22.960 --> 02:14:28.079
much. Perhaps I have saddened you
with it all, have I? No?

1532
02:14:28.640 --> 02:14:33.079
She replied with a gentle smile,
shaking her head. No, not

1533
02:14:33.279 --> 02:14:39.720
really. He let himself drop into
a chair, sighing deeply. Alas such

1534
02:14:39.840 --> 02:14:43.720
is life, he murmured, with
a fixed gaze full of sinister significance.

1535
02:14:45.960 --> 02:14:50.720
She made no answer, her heart
was too full. By this time it

1536
02:14:50.880 --> 02:14:56.439
was dark. Van Maheron took his
leave. Frank alone had been asked to

1537
02:14:56.479 --> 02:15:00.920
stay to dinner. Have you forgiven
me? He asked, very humbly,

1538
02:15:01.079 --> 02:15:05.319
with his most insinuating and romantic air. As the last rays of daylight shed

1539
02:15:05.359 --> 02:15:11.439
an ethereal glow on his face for
what she said. But she was silently

1540
02:15:11.479 --> 02:15:18.520
weeping for having distressed you even for
a minute. She nodded and rose,

1541
02:15:18.680 --> 02:15:22.760
trembling, exhausted and tottering, Oh, yes, you gave me a great

1542
02:15:22.800 --> 02:15:26.880
fright, but you will not do
so again. I beg Never, he

1543
02:15:28.039 --> 02:15:33.439
murmured. He kissed her hand,
a courteous caress he was accustomed to bestow,

1544
02:15:33.920 --> 02:15:37.000
with a touch of foppery, like
an eighteenth century marquis, and he

1545
02:15:37.079 --> 02:15:43.239
went away. She was left alone, standing there in the middle of the

1546
02:15:43.319 --> 02:15:48.119
room. She closed her eyes,
and she felt as though a mist had

1547
02:15:48.159 --> 02:15:52.359
fallen and then wrapped her. And
in that mist she saw Mulder her and

1548
02:15:52.439 --> 02:15:58.520
the spectral fjord gleaming between the two
ranges of protecting mountains, and far away

1549
02:15:58.600 --> 02:16:05.239
in the wear those three thin bars
of gold. And suddenly she felt as

1550
02:16:05.239 --> 02:16:09.840
she had never felt before, so
forlorn, so lonely, in the midst

1551
02:16:09.880 --> 02:16:15.079
of the cloud, without even a
thought of Sir Archibald and Frank, remembering

1552
02:16:15.119 --> 02:16:18.880
nothing but her long dead mother.
Her weight pressed on her brain like the

1553
02:16:20.119 --> 02:16:24.119
icy palm of a giant's hand.
Dusky gloom closed in upon her, and

1554
02:16:24.279 --> 02:16:30.279
Suddenly the living warmth within her was
chilled, as with a deadly frost.

1555
02:16:31.119 --> 02:16:35.000
She felt as if she were standing
in vast space and through it, invisible,

1556
02:16:35.120 --> 02:16:41.399
intangible, and yet sensibly and undeniably
real. She was aware of a

1557
02:16:41.440 --> 02:16:46.840
coming horror, rolling dully on like
distant thunder. She stretched out her hands,

1558
02:16:48.360 --> 02:16:52.719
feeling for some support, but she
did not fall senseless. She recovered

1559
02:16:52.760 --> 02:16:56.719
herself and found that she was still
in the middle of the room, now

1560
02:16:56.799 --> 02:17:01.799
almost dark, a little tremulin and
with a feeble sensation about the knees.

1561
02:17:03.559 --> 02:17:07.159
And she could not but think there
was something, yet, something which Bertie

1562
02:17:07.239 --> 02:17:16.559
had concealed from her. Eight next
day she thought it all over once more.

1563
02:17:16.040 --> 02:17:20.799
What was it? What was it? Would Bertie have pitied her so

1564
02:17:20.920 --> 02:17:24.799
if there really had been nothing in
it but his own pessimistic fears for her

1565
02:17:24.840 --> 02:17:28.840
happiness? Or was he not indeed
hiding something and had it anything to do

1566
02:17:28.920 --> 02:17:35.000
with Frank? And then Frank came, and she often saw him sit quite

1567
02:17:35.040 --> 02:17:39.360
still for a time with a frown
on his brow. What is the matter,

1568
02:17:39.959 --> 02:17:43.600
she asked, and he replied,
just as usual, nothing, sweetheart.

1569
02:17:45.079 --> 02:17:48.600
And they chatted together, at first
a little constrained, but soon quite

1570
02:17:48.600 --> 02:17:54.040
happy again in their plans and dreams, forgetting what weighed on their minds.

1571
02:17:54.319 --> 02:18:00.440
Eva would laugh brightly and perch herself
on Frank's knee and play with his stash.

1572
02:18:01.399 --> 02:18:05.120
But if Bertie came in, something
seemed at once to come between them,

1573
02:18:05.440 --> 02:18:09.920
a shadow which parted them. It
was when the friends were alone together

1574
02:18:09.000 --> 02:18:15.159
that they were most still at ease. Then Vestova could only long to turn

1575
02:18:15.239 --> 02:18:20.879
Van Mayern out of doors at once
without the smallest perceptible cause, like a

1576
02:18:20.920 --> 02:18:26.840
mangy hound, he pictured Bertie as
he had seen him, standing shivering in

1577
02:18:26.920 --> 02:18:31.479
his wretched raiment that snowy night.
Now he was such a dandy, and

1578
02:18:31.639 --> 02:18:37.239
nothing was too good for him,
and he was irreproachable. He did not

1579
02:18:37.399 --> 02:18:41.680
even go off for a few days
at a time, wandering obscurely like a

1580
02:18:41.680 --> 02:18:48.079
cat. He was always interesting with
his halo of melancholy, and since the

1581
02:18:48.120 --> 02:18:52.760
scene over the Secretary Ship, he
often assumed a reproachful tone in his voice

1582
02:18:52.760 --> 02:18:58.319
and expression when speaking to Frank.
Eva, when left to herself, was

1583
02:18:58.399 --> 02:19:03.479
deeply wretched. Chaotic doubts tortured her
soul, doubts which for the moment she

1584
02:19:03.520 --> 02:19:07.600
could set aside, but which would
force themselves on her as soon as she

1585
02:19:07.680 --> 02:19:15.200
thought of Bertie's sympathetic smile and strange
compassion for her. Oh, what was

1586
02:19:15.239 --> 02:19:18.680
it? What was it? She
had often meant to talk it over with

1587
02:19:18.760 --> 02:19:22.559
Frank, but when she was on
the point of beginning the subject, she

1588
02:19:22.639 --> 02:19:28.280
did not know what to say.
That Bertie pitied her. It could be

1589
02:19:28.319 --> 02:19:33.559
nothing but his own pessimism, which, in its universal humanity, regarded the

1590
02:19:33.600 --> 02:19:39.440
world as worthy of pity, since
it seemed created to be wretched. Should

1591
02:19:39.440 --> 02:19:43.639
she ask Frank whether he had any
silent grief, if he had anything to

1592
02:19:43.719 --> 02:19:46.959
trouble him. This she did once
or twice, and the answer was always

1593
02:19:48.040 --> 02:19:52.360
the same, nothing, dearest.
What's then? Oh? What was this?

1594
02:19:52.479 --> 02:19:58.559
Horror? Alas she could get no
further, She stood as it were

1595
02:19:58.559 --> 02:20:03.600
a blindfolding, an enchant circle which
she could not overstep, and her hand

1596
02:20:03.719 --> 02:20:09.840
felt all round but could grasp nothing. If she resolutely banished such thoughts,

1597
02:20:09.280 --> 02:20:16.120
they came back again, persistently,
they overwhelmed her afresh. They repossessed themselves

1598
02:20:16.120 --> 02:20:22.360
of her brain, suggesting endless doubts, and ending always always in the same

1599
02:20:22.440 --> 02:20:28.600
question. Which was the invariable outcome
of these miserable cogitations? What can it

1600
02:20:28.680 --> 02:20:35.120
be? Is there anything at all? And never an answer? She had

1601
02:20:35.159 --> 02:20:39.719
once again questioned Bertie, but he
had only smiled with that terrifying smile of

1602
02:20:39.799 --> 02:20:43.600
woe, and had implored her not
to rack her brain over anything which he

1603
02:20:43.680 --> 02:20:50.520
might have inconsiderately let drop as the
natural outcome of his melancholy temper. Otherwise

1604
02:20:50.680 --> 02:20:56.639
he should henceforth always be afraid of
speaking to her with any frankness. He

1605
02:20:56.719 --> 02:21:01.840
must weigh his words and their confidential
intimacy a brother and sister would be at

1606
02:21:01.840 --> 02:21:05.600
an end, and her own feeling
in the matter was full of dubious half

1607
02:21:05.719 --> 02:21:11.479
lights, in which no outline was
distinct, no color decided, a confusion

1608
02:21:11.520 --> 02:21:18.079
of shadowy gray tints which dimmed the
clear brightness of her love with increasing gloom,

1609
02:21:18.600 --> 02:21:24.399
fatiguing her spirit by their indefiniteness,
then no existence in actual life,

1610
02:21:24.440 --> 02:21:33.879
and their intangible semblance of reality like
a dream. Nine Once, however,

1611
02:21:33.079 --> 02:21:39.920
the dream took substance. Once she
touched, she saw, she heard something,

1612
02:21:39.399 --> 02:21:43.719
but what was that it? They
were coming out of the lyceum.

1613
02:21:43.959 --> 02:21:50.000
The crowd streamed forth, slowly,
shuffling, pushing impatiently now and then shoulders

1614
02:21:50.000 --> 02:21:56.159
to shoulder and in the crush close
to her. Eva saw the flaming red,

1615
02:21:56.200 --> 02:22:01.000
plush opera cloak of a tall,
stout woman and under a babyish cherry

1616
02:22:01.040 --> 02:22:05.799
ripe hat. Her face rose white
and black, with a doll like smile,

1617
02:22:05.239 --> 02:22:11.000
which suddenly leaned across her to address
Frank. The brim of the hat

1618
02:22:11.120 --> 02:22:15.360
rested on a mass of yellow curls. A scent of musk and rice powder

1619
02:22:15.399 --> 02:22:20.239
greeted her nostrils, and like a
blow in her own face, she heard

1620
02:22:20.280 --> 02:22:24.760
the words, HALLO, good evening, Frank, how are you, old

1621
02:22:24.840 --> 02:22:30.879
boy? She started and shrank back, looking hastily first at the rouged face

1622
02:22:31.239 --> 02:22:35.799
and then at Frank. She saw
his flashing look of rage. Nor did

1623
02:22:35.879 --> 02:22:41.159
the tall woman's confusion escape her notice
a damsel of the skating rink. Though

1624
02:22:41.200 --> 02:22:46.079
the stranger drew back at seeing a
lady on Frank's arm, she had evidently

1625
02:22:46.239 --> 02:22:50.239
at first seen him over Eva's head
in the crowd, and she now vanished,

1626
02:22:50.719 --> 02:22:54.479
disconcerted by her own blunder in addressing
a man who had a lady with

1627
02:22:54.600 --> 02:22:58.920
him. But she shot a glance
of amazed inquiry at Van Meyren, who

1628
02:23:00.159 --> 02:23:05.399
close behind Bertie might have warned her, for it was Bertie who had whispered

1629
02:23:05.479 --> 02:23:09.399
three words under the cherry ripe hat, with a nod towards the front,

1630
02:23:09.079 --> 02:23:15.680
saying, there goes Frank. She
was vexed with herself, but she really

1631
02:23:15.719 --> 02:23:20.600
had not seen the young lady.
When they reached home, Sir Archibald,

1632
02:23:20.680 --> 02:23:26.200
who had observed nothing, was bidding
them good night at the door. But

1633
02:23:26.360 --> 02:23:30.159
Frank exclaimed, I beg your pardon, but I must speak to Eva.

1634
02:23:30.360 --> 02:23:33.959
I beg of you. It was
already late, but Sir Archibald was no

1635
02:23:35.079 --> 02:23:39.079
stickle of her etiquette. They were
alone, looking at each other with anxious

1636
02:23:39.079 --> 02:23:46.479
eyes, but neither spoke. Frank
began hurriedly, stumbling over his words,

1637
02:23:46.559 --> 02:23:52.239
as if he were eager to forestall
any evil suspicion she might entertain. Eva.

1638
02:23:52.639 --> 02:23:56.200
Believe me, Eva, you must
believe me. It was nothing.

1639
02:23:56.719 --> 02:24:01.360
You must not think anything of of
what's happened just now. In a few

1640
02:24:01.399 --> 02:24:05.000
brief words, he told a former
acquaintance, a young man's acquaintance of the

1641
02:24:05.000 --> 02:24:09.399
skating rink. This was all at
an end. It was a thing of

1642
02:24:09.440 --> 02:24:13.760
the past. She must know that
every man had a past. She knew

1643
02:24:13.760 --> 02:24:20.000
that, surely a past, she
echoed, coldly, Oh, every man

1644
02:24:20.079 --> 02:24:26.200
has a past. But we we
have no past, Eva, Eva,

1645
02:24:26.680 --> 02:24:31.959
he cried, for through the irony
of her tone there pierced such acute pain

1646
02:24:33.280 --> 02:24:37.879
that he stood dismayed and helpless,
not knowing how to comfort her. Tell

1647
02:24:37.959 --> 02:24:43.000
me only this match. She went
on, going close up to him and

1648
02:24:43.079 --> 02:24:48.079
looking into his face with that strange
stare. She laid her hands on his

1649
02:24:48.200 --> 02:24:52.399
shoulders and tried to read his inmost
soul through his eyes, and she slowly

1650
02:24:52.440 --> 02:24:56.200
said, expecting to hear her own
doom in the first word, he should

1651
02:24:56.280 --> 02:25:01.920
utter, is it? At an
end, he fell on his knees before

1652
02:25:01.959 --> 02:25:05.479
her, where she had dropped on
a chair, rigidly upright, as if

1653
02:25:05.520 --> 02:25:11.479
she were frozen. He warmed her
resisting hands in his grasp, and he

1654
02:25:11.639 --> 02:25:16.280
swore that it was his oath.
Rang true truth was stamped on his face,

1655
02:25:16.399 --> 02:25:22.520
and she believed him. He besought
forgiveness, told her that she must

1656
02:25:22.520 --> 02:25:26.479
never think of it again, that
all men, Oh, yes, She

1657
02:25:26.600 --> 02:25:31.559
nodded her comprehension, I know,
I understand, Papa has brought me upon

1658
02:25:31.680 --> 02:25:37.600
rather liberal lines. He recollected that
phrase. She had used it once before,

1659
02:25:37.079 --> 02:25:43.840
and they both at once remembered Mulderhoy
and the black clouds. Eva shuddered,

1660
02:25:43.920 --> 02:25:48.319
are you cold, dearest? But
she shook her head still, with

1661
02:25:48.399 --> 02:25:54.079
a strange light in her eyes.
He would have clasped her in his arms,

1662
02:25:54.479 --> 02:25:58.639
but she drew back, and he
felt himself rebuffed, almost rejected.

1663
02:25:58.680 --> 02:26:03.520
He could not understand her. Why
no kiss, Why no generous reconciliation?

1664
02:26:03.799 --> 02:26:09.000
If she understood so well, if
she had been so liberally trained, but

1665
02:26:09.079 --> 02:26:13.440
she was perhaps a little upset.
He would not be too urgent. It

1666
02:26:13.479 --> 02:26:20.200
would, no doubt blow over when
he was gone. Eva, in her

1667
02:26:20.200 --> 02:26:24.239
own room, shivered and her teeth
chattered, as if she had an ague,

1668
02:26:24.840 --> 02:26:28.200
and she began to cry, bitterly, miserably, with deep, despairing

1669
02:26:28.319 --> 02:26:33.200
sobs, for grief that she lived, that she was a rational being,

1670
02:26:33.760 --> 02:26:37.239
a woman above all that she had
ever loved, that the world existed,

1671
02:26:37.399 --> 02:26:43.120
That everything was so mean, so
base, a mud heap. She loathed

1672
02:26:43.159 --> 02:26:46.440
it all. She felt as if
she had never really understood any of the

1673
02:26:46.479 --> 02:26:52.639
books she had read. Neither the
fairy Queen nor ghosts, especially ghosts,

1674
02:26:52.200 --> 02:26:58.719
never understood anything she had learnt under
her father's rather liberal training. The White

1675
02:26:58.760 --> 02:27:05.040
Fea, the redown of her illusions, was blown into space. A rough

1676
02:27:05.040 --> 02:27:09.000
hand had rubbed away the bloom from
her most secret and inmost soul. The

1677
02:27:09.079 --> 02:27:15.639
sacred innocence of her maidenhood had been
dragged in the gutter for the first time.

1678
02:27:16.120 --> 02:27:20.520
The peace of her great but reasonable
love for Frank came into violent collision

1679
02:27:20.559 --> 02:27:26.200
with the romance of her girlish dreams, and the balance of the two feelings

1680
02:27:26.319 --> 02:27:33.479
was destroyed. Of the practical and
the romantic side of her character. Ten

1681
02:27:35.639 --> 02:27:39.520
after that conversation with Eva, Bertie
felt as though he were living in a

1682
02:27:39.520 --> 02:27:45.000
more subtle atmosphere, wondering in a
labyrinth full of mysterious ways of craft and

1683
02:27:45.079 --> 02:27:48.639
cunning, in which he must walk
very circumspectully if he did not wish to

1684
02:27:48.719 --> 02:27:54.239
lose himself. He knew very well
what he had been driving at. He

1685
02:27:54.319 --> 02:28:01.360
wanted to instill into Eva suspicions of
Frank's constancy. She not herself know her

1686
02:28:01.360 --> 02:28:05.799
lover to be fickle, almost capricious. Had not his hints been well chosen,

1687
02:28:07.600 --> 02:28:11.879
had he not sown the seed of
doubt he did not know. He

1688
02:28:11.920 --> 02:28:16.479
saw nothing to reassure him. In
the regular monotonous routine of everyday life,

1689
02:28:16.000 --> 02:28:22.239
in which subtle shades of manner so
often escape even the keenest observer. Eva

1690
02:28:22.319 --> 02:28:28.799
had indeed once asked him about that
something. But after that, in appearance

1691
02:28:28.879 --> 02:28:33.719
at least their intercourse had been on
the old footing. Again, he saw

1692
02:28:33.760 --> 02:28:37.479
no difference in Eva, none in
Frank. So Eva could have said nothing

1693
02:28:37.520 --> 02:28:45.440
to her lover and asked him no
questions. Before that afternoon, Bertie had

1694
02:28:45.440 --> 02:28:50.920
known hesitancy, had felt some disgust
at his own heartlessness, some horror of

1695
02:28:50.959 --> 02:28:56.000
his own monstrous selfishness. But that
talk with Eva had been the first step

1696
02:28:56.040 --> 02:29:00.920
on a downward path, where it
was now impossible to turn back. A

1697
02:29:00.959 --> 02:29:05.600
singular lucidity of thought dawned in his
brain, as though his brain was a

1698
02:29:05.600 --> 02:29:11.600
crystal mirror in which his ideas were
reflected in a vivid light. Never yet

1699
02:29:11.680 --> 02:29:16.920
had he felt himself so keenly alert, so clearly logical, Never had he

1700
02:29:16.000 --> 02:29:20.120
aimed so true at an object in
view with the precision of a needle.

1701
02:29:22.239 --> 02:29:26.639
The clearness of his mind was so
perfect that, in a naive perception of

1702
02:29:26.680 --> 02:29:31.559
his own baseness, a lucid moment
of self knowledge which once flashed on him

1703
02:29:31.719 --> 02:29:35.600
to his surprise, for no more
than a second, he wondered that he

1704
02:29:35.639 --> 02:29:41.399
should not apply so much talent and
ingenuity to a nobler purpose. Why did

1705
02:29:41.440 --> 02:29:46.120
you never become an artist? He
could hear, even asking him, but

1706
02:29:46.239 --> 02:29:50.479
he only smiled. The practical weariness
of life rose up before him, his

1707
02:29:50.559 --> 02:29:56.280
own indolence, his catlike love of
physical ease. No, no, he

1708
02:29:56.319 --> 02:30:01.319
could not help himself. So it
must be the first step was taken.

1709
02:30:01.879 --> 02:30:07.520
It was fate then, that evening, as they came out of the theater,

1710
02:30:09.120 --> 02:30:13.680
that woman who belonged to their past
life, his own significant nod and

1711
02:30:13.719 --> 02:30:18.719
his words, there goes Frank.
Was not all this too a fatality?

1712
02:30:18.559 --> 02:30:22.680
Did not Fate s drew such trivial
incidents as these in the path of those

1713
02:30:22.719 --> 02:30:28.719
who burnt incense at her shrine and
paid her due worship, to be utilized

1714
02:30:28.760 --> 02:30:33.399
by them as benefits, infinitely small
links which they must themselves welded into the

1715
02:30:33.479 --> 02:30:39.799
chain. Did not Fate give men
the illusion of free will and a semblance

1716
02:30:39.840 --> 02:30:43.000
of truth to the lie which says
that they, by their own energy can

1717
02:30:43.040 --> 02:30:48.920
coerce the course of circumstance no more
than a word a nod, there goes

1718
02:30:48.959 --> 02:30:54.840
Frank. And then for the rest
trust to the chance chance. What is

1719
02:30:56.000 --> 02:31:01.680
chance that the smart damsel of the
skating ring should Overlookeiva, tiny dainty,

1720
02:31:01.760 --> 02:31:05.920
Eva lost in the crowd. Had
the results been such as he had counted

1721
02:31:05.959 --> 02:31:11.440
on, had he guessed the purpose
of fate, Yes, he thought,

1722
02:31:11.680 --> 02:31:15.799
in some small degree, Why else
should Frank have craved an interview with Eva

1723
02:31:15.840 --> 02:31:20.639
at so late an hour, and
so in that atmosphere of finely spun cunning,

1724
02:31:20.200 --> 02:31:24.920
in that labyrinth of wiles. He
no longer regarded himself as base,

1725
02:31:26.120 --> 02:31:33.000
heartless, selfish words, mere words, It was folly to consider things too

1726
02:31:33.040 --> 02:31:39.399
closely. He dismissed all scruples,
and if they would sometimes force themselves on

1727
02:31:39.520 --> 02:31:43.200
him, he would argue with himself. Who could tell whether it was not

1728
02:31:43.280 --> 02:31:46.399
a good thing. If Frank shourued
not to marry, he was not a

1729
02:31:46.399 --> 02:31:50.559
man to marry. No, really, he was changeable, capricious, and

1730
02:31:50.639 --> 02:31:56.200
inconstant. He would not make a
wife happy. Still, Van Meyern could

1731
02:31:56.200 --> 02:32:00.719
see at once that this was a
self deception, and he would laugh to

1732
02:32:00.799 --> 02:32:05.879
himself, shaking his head at finding
himself so droll, so singular. Life

1733
02:32:07.000 --> 02:32:11.559
was as nothing, Nothing was worth
troubling one's self about. But this introspection,

1734
02:32:13.000 --> 02:32:16.559
this self study, looking into one's
own mind, juggling with one's own

1735
02:32:16.639 --> 02:32:22.479
thoughts, that was really interesting,
That was an amusing occupation while lying at

1736
02:32:22.600 --> 02:32:30.559
full length on a comfortable sofa,
And yet he seldom enjoyed any repose of

1737
02:32:30.680 --> 02:32:35.479
mind. The web of his scheming
was perpetually being wearily woven in his mind.

1738
02:32:37.680 --> 02:32:41.319
His interviews with Eva were a fatiguing
effort, sometimes a long discourse,

1739
02:32:41.840 --> 02:32:48.479
sometimes only half utterances, for he
had constantly and precisely to weigh every word.

1740
02:32:48.840 --> 02:32:54.000
Still, this weariness was never to
be detected in his air and manner,

1741
02:32:54.559 --> 02:32:58.760
or in the phrases which fell from
his lips, so apparently unpremeditated that

1742
02:32:58.840 --> 02:33:05.600
they seemed alive with natural impulse,
They were in fact the outcome of a

1743
02:33:05.639 --> 02:33:11.920
theatrical and carefully elaborated pessimism. They
were lamentations over the ills of life,

1744
02:33:11.840 --> 02:33:18.799
pity for Eva, wrapped in mysterious
regrets. And amid all this melancholy accusations

1745
02:33:18.840 --> 02:33:26.159
against Vestova mere trifles, passing hints, amounting to nothing but for the tone

1746
02:33:26.159 --> 02:33:33.799
and accent, accusations of levity,
inconstancy, caprice, fickleness. But at

1747
02:33:33.879 --> 02:33:39.440
the slightest outcry on Eva's part,
he was ready to contradict himself, fencing

1748
02:33:39.520 --> 02:33:43.479
cleverly enough now with himself and now
with Eva, with all the feints of

1749
02:33:43.520 --> 02:33:48.200
a master of the foils, just
touching her lightly, a prick here and

1750
02:33:48.239 --> 02:33:54.239
a prick there, drawing a tiny
drop of blood at each hit. And

1751
02:33:54.360 --> 02:33:58.479
to Eva it seemed that her soul, after having been dragged through a gutter,

1752
02:34:00.200 --> 02:34:05.440
was bleeding to death under these pinpricks. It was a very sensible pain

1753
02:34:05.520 --> 02:34:09.600
when she hopelessly compared the reality with
her dreams as they grew more vague and

1754
02:34:09.639 --> 02:34:15.520
faded away. When she argued with
herself in the cold light of reason and

1755
02:34:15.639 --> 02:34:20.120
asked herself, why am I so
wretched? Because Frank is a young man

1756
02:34:20.239 --> 02:34:24.479
like other young men, because Bertie
is a pessimist, The despairs of my

1757
02:34:24.559 --> 02:34:28.760
ever being happy. And then she
would shrug her shoulders. Her trouble was

1758
02:34:28.799 --> 02:34:35.040
intangible, had paled to a thin
cloud and vanished. She had always been

1759
02:34:35.159 --> 02:34:39.799
very happy. Bertie's dejection was sickly
nonsense. She should be happy again.

1760
02:34:41.559 --> 02:34:46.719
But notwithstanding that, her common sense
thus dissipated the pain, it's constantly returned,

1761
02:34:46.760 --> 02:34:52.200
in spite of reason and argument,
returned persistently, like an object tossed

1762
02:34:52.239 --> 02:34:58.959
on a wave which comes and goes, comes and goes. She could enery

1763
02:35:00.000 --> 02:35:03.280
you're it no longer. And one
day, when she ventured to look honestly

1764
02:35:03.319 --> 02:35:09.120
into her own heart, she saw
that she did indeed doubt Frank and the

1765
02:35:09.200 --> 02:35:13.920
truth of his statements about that woman. Longing for some certainty, she asked

1766
02:35:13.959 --> 02:35:18.559
Bertie, his friend, tell me, Bertie, that's something of which you

1767
02:35:18.600 --> 02:35:24.479
once spoke to me. That's mystery. What is it? Oh? Nothing,

1768
02:35:24.600 --> 02:35:30.520
my dear girl, Absolutely nothing.
She gazed at him with penetrating eyes

1769
02:35:31.000 --> 02:35:35.719
and went on in a strange,
cold tone. Well, but I know

1770
02:35:35.120 --> 02:35:39.920
I have guessed. Bertie was startled. What was she thinking? What had

1771
02:35:39.959 --> 02:35:45.479
she got into her head? Yes, I have guessed it, she repeated.

1772
02:35:45.920 --> 02:35:50.479
Frank does not love me. He
loves he loves that's woman, that

1773
02:35:50.719 --> 02:35:54.680
creature of the lyceum. He has
always loved her. Is it so?

1774
02:35:54.959 --> 02:36:01.079
Bertie said nothing, but stared before
him. That was the easiest and best

1775
02:36:01.159 --> 02:36:07.319
reply, Bertie, tell me,
is it so? No? It is

1776
02:36:07.399 --> 02:36:11.639
not so, he answered, Dully, what a foolish notion to have got

1777
02:36:11.680 --> 02:36:16.000
into your head? What made you
think of such a thing? But there

1778
02:36:16.040 --> 02:36:20.159
was no ring of conviction in his
voice. He spoke mechanically, as though

1779
02:36:20.200 --> 02:36:24.879
in absence of mind, as if
he were thinking of something else. Does

1780
02:36:24.879 --> 02:36:28.719
he ever see her now? She
went on, feeling as if she were

1781
02:36:28.760 --> 02:36:33.399
defiling herself with her own words,
as if her lips were dropping slime.

1782
02:36:35.239 --> 02:36:39.479
Why, of course not, what
are you thinking of? She leaned back

1783
02:36:39.559 --> 02:36:45.680
with a sigh, and tears glistened
in her large eyes. He was silent

1784
02:36:45.799 --> 02:36:50.799
for a minute, studying her out
of the corner of his eye. Then,

1785
02:36:50.200 --> 02:36:54.639
as if to mitigate his too feeble
repudiation of the suspicion, he went

1786
02:36:54.680 --> 02:37:00.639
on, reproachfully. Really, Eva, you must not think such things as

1787
02:37:00.719 --> 02:37:05.040
Frank. It is not nice.
He must have some confidence in the manure

1788
02:37:05.120 --> 02:37:09.799
to marry. Then it is not
the truth, certainly not. He never

1789
02:37:09.840 --> 02:37:15.680
sees her now? But does not
he think of her? Still? He

1790
02:37:15.760 --> 02:37:20.520
gave her a long, deep,
enigmatical look. His eyes were like black

1791
02:37:20.639 --> 02:37:26.680
velvet darkness. She could not read
their meaning. Fie said, he reprovingly,

1792
02:37:28.079 --> 02:37:33.000
and he shook his head. That
is no answer, she said urgently,

1793
02:37:33.959 --> 02:37:37.959
and again he fixed that dark gaze
on her. Good God, answer

1794
02:37:39.000 --> 02:37:43.159
me, she cried, her heart
wrung to the very core. How can

1795
02:37:43.200 --> 02:37:48.520
you expect me to know Frank's feelings? He dared to murmur, I don't

1796
02:37:48.559 --> 02:37:54.239
know. There, then it is
so, she moaned, clutching his hands.

1797
02:37:54.399 --> 02:38:00.000
I don't know, he repeated,
and freeing himself from her grass,

1798
02:38:00.760 --> 02:38:05.879
he turned away and rose. He
loves her, he cannot live without her.

1799
02:38:05.319 --> 02:38:09.360
Hears that creature's slave, as you
men sometimes are to such women.

1800
02:38:09.760 --> 02:38:13.479
And though he sees her no more, out of respect for me, he

1801
02:38:13.559 --> 02:38:16.879
thinks of her and talks of her
to you. And that is why he

1802
02:38:16.959 --> 02:38:22.559
is so silent and grave when he
is here. Is it so good?

1803
02:38:22.680 --> 02:38:28.280
Heavens? I do not know,
he groaned with mild impatience. How should

1804
02:38:28.319 --> 02:38:31.959
I know? But why then does
he pretend to love me? Why did

1805
02:38:31.959 --> 02:38:35.440
he ask me to marry him?
Because once, for a moment, in

1806
02:38:35.520 --> 02:38:39.440
no way he fancied he could do
without her, because he meant to live

1807
02:38:39.479 --> 02:38:45.600
a new life, and out finds
that he cannot. She clasped her hands

1808
02:38:45.760 --> 02:38:50.879
with a gesture of anguish. Good
God, Eva, say no more,

1809
02:38:50.479 --> 02:38:54.319
Say no more. I do not
know. I tell you, I know

1810
02:38:54.440 --> 02:39:00.319
nothing about it. Nothing. He
sank back in his chair with a sigh

1811
02:39:00.360 --> 02:39:05.360
of exhaustion. She said no more. The tears streamed from her eyes like

1812
02:39:05.559 --> 02:39:18.879
rain, impossible to be restrained.
End of Section four, Section five of

1813
02:39:20.000 --> 02:39:26.680
Footsteps of fate by Luis Kuperos.
This LibriVox recording is in the public domain,

1814
02:39:28.879 --> 02:39:35.760
Part three eleven to fourteen eleven.
And in her misery, she thought

1815
02:39:35.799 --> 02:39:39.399
she had been very clever and cunning, and that she had guessed rightly,

1816
02:39:39.040 --> 02:39:43.000
while in truth as guileless as a
child. She had been, as it

1817
02:39:43.159 --> 02:39:48.959
were, hypnotized by his magnetic gaze, and had spoken the very words he

1818
02:39:48.000 --> 02:39:54.120
had intended she should utter. She
felt nothing of this. She saw him

1819
02:39:54.120 --> 02:39:58.479
still as her brother friend, fragile, affectionate and unhappy, dreading to wound

1820
02:39:58.520 --> 02:40:03.959
her, anxious to screen her from
the truth for fear of hurting her,

1821
02:40:03.680 --> 02:40:07.920
and yet not crafty enough to conceal
it when she pressed him too closely.

1822
02:40:09.079 --> 02:40:13.280
This was how he appeared to her. Not for an instant did she suspect

1823
02:40:13.440 --> 02:40:18.639
that she was as a fly wrapping
itself closer and closer in the spider's toils.

1824
02:40:20.879 --> 02:40:24.639
But he himself, after this scene, failed to see clearly that he

1825
02:40:24.760 --> 02:40:28.840
had pulled the wires, that he
had been the first to taint her confidence

1826
02:40:28.920 --> 02:40:33.399
with the poison of suspicion, that
he had brought about the catastrophe as they

1827
02:40:33.440 --> 02:40:37.959
came out of the lyceum, that
he had compelled Eva to follow the clue

1828
02:40:37.000 --> 02:40:43.120
he had chosen to suggest. Dimness
shrouded the clearness of his mental vision as

1829
02:40:43.159 --> 02:40:48.639
a breath clouds a mirror. The
lucid crisis of his faculties was pasted.

1830
02:40:50.000 --> 02:40:54.319
This was all the outcome of circumstances, he thought. No human being of

1831
02:40:54.360 --> 02:41:00.760
his own free will would work such
things out. How easily everything had come

1832
02:41:00.799 --> 02:41:05.719
about, how simply without a hitch. It was because fate had so willed

1833
02:41:05.719 --> 02:41:11.079
it and had favored him. He
had no part in it. Nor was

1834
02:41:11.159 --> 02:41:18.520
this self deception, he really thought
so. In the evening after their last

1835
02:41:18.559 --> 02:41:22.760
interview, Eva went very late to
seek her father in his study, where

1836
02:41:22.760 --> 02:41:28.840
he sat reading his books on heraldry. He supposed she had come to bid

1837
02:41:28.879 --> 02:41:31.840
him good night, as usual,
but she sat down facing him, very

1838
02:41:31.920 --> 02:41:37.200
upright and with a set face,
like a sleepwalker. Father, I want

1839
02:41:37.239 --> 02:41:43.600
to speak to you, he looked
at her in surprise. In the Olympian

1840
02:41:43.680 --> 02:41:48.719
piece of his genealogical studies, in
the calm, emotionless existence of a hale

1841
02:41:48.760 --> 02:41:52.600
old man who finds a solace for
advancing years, among his books, he

1842
02:41:52.680 --> 02:41:58.200
had never discerned that a drama was
going on close beside him. Played by

1843
02:41:58.280 --> 02:42:01.639
three beings whom he saw every day. And he was startled at his daughter's

1844
02:42:01.719 --> 02:42:07.159
rigid face and tone of suppressed suffering. Are you ill, my child?

1845
02:42:07.639 --> 02:42:11.159
Oh no, I'm quite well.
But I want to ask you something.

1846
02:42:11.600 --> 02:42:16.920
I want to know if you will
speak to Frank. To Frank, Yes,

1847
02:42:16.079 --> 02:42:20.000
to Frank. The other evening,
as we were coming out of the

1848
02:42:20.120 --> 02:42:24.120
lyceum, and she told him the
whole story, sitting straight up in her

1849
02:42:24.200 --> 02:42:28.719
chair, with that strange look in
her face and a husky, subdued voice,

1850
02:42:30.280 --> 02:42:35.760
all about the yellow haired woman and
her own suspicions and distrust. It

1851
02:42:35.959 --> 02:42:39.360
was wrong of her to doubt Frank, but really she could not help it.

1852
02:42:39.600 --> 02:42:43.680
She would fain have quoted Bertie as
evidence, but Bertie had, after

1853
02:42:43.760 --> 02:42:48.239
all, said nothing definite, so
she did not see how she could bring

1854
02:42:48.360 --> 02:42:52.879
him into court, and did not
therefore mention his name. Sir Archibald listened

1855
02:42:52.879 --> 02:42:58.520
in dismay. He had never suspected
what was going on in his daughter's mind.

1856
02:42:58.319 --> 02:43:01.799
He had always suppose that everything was
as clear as the sun at noon.

1857
02:43:03.719 --> 02:43:07.840
And what then, he asked,
in some embarrassments, And then I

1858
02:43:07.920 --> 02:43:13.120
want you to speak to Frank,
ask him point blank whether he still loves

1859
02:43:13.159 --> 02:43:16.959
this woman who has played some part
in his past life. Whether he cannot

1860
02:43:18.000 --> 02:43:20.639
bear to give her up, whether
that is the reason he is always so

1861
02:43:20.719 --> 02:43:24.920
silent and gloomy when we see him
here. Get him to speak out.

1862
02:43:26.479 --> 02:43:30.559
I would rather hear my doom than
live in this dreadful suspense. And to

1863
02:43:30.639 --> 02:43:33.520
you, perhaps he will clear it
all up so that things may go on

1864
02:43:33.639 --> 02:43:37.840
as they were before. Say nothing
of my distrust. If it is not

1865
02:43:39.120 --> 02:43:43.840
justified by the facts. It might
make him angry. It is too bad

1866
02:43:43.879 --> 02:43:46.520
of me to suspect his truth.
And I have tried to bring myself to

1867
02:43:46.559 --> 02:43:52.559
a better mind, but I cannot
succeed. There is something in it I

1868
02:43:52.600 --> 02:43:56.799
know not what. There is something
in the air about me. Oh what

1869
02:43:56.079 --> 02:44:00.959
I know not which whispers to me. Do not trust him, Do not

1870
02:44:01.079 --> 02:44:05.520
trust him. I cannot understand what
it is, but I feel it in

1871
02:44:05.600 --> 02:44:09.239
me, all about me. It
is a voice in my ear, sometimes

1872
02:44:09.239 --> 02:44:13.280
an eye which gazes at me at
night when I cannot sleep. It looks

1873
02:44:13.319 --> 02:44:18.040
down on me, it speaks to
me. I feel as if I were

1874
02:44:18.040 --> 02:44:22.520
going crazy. Perhaps it is a
spirit. But do you speak to him,

1875
02:44:22.520 --> 02:44:26.319
Papa, do that much for your
child. I'm so very very unhappy.

1876
02:44:28.520 --> 02:44:31.079
She knelt at his feet and laid
her head on his knees, sobbing

1877
02:44:31.159 --> 02:44:37.280
bitterly. He mechanically stroked her hair. But he did not in the least

1878
02:44:37.360 --> 02:44:41.360
understand. He loved his child,
but his affection was more a matter of

1879
02:44:41.440 --> 02:44:48.520
tender habits than of sympathetic intelligence.
He did not understand her. He thought

1880
02:44:48.559 --> 02:44:52.639
her foolish and fanciful. Was it
for this that he had given her a

1881
02:44:52.680 --> 02:44:56.200
first rate education, let her read
all kinds of books, and made her

1882
02:44:56.239 --> 02:45:01.399
know the world as it was stern
practice and selfish, a struggle in which

1883
02:45:01.440 --> 02:45:07.079
each one must endeavor to conquer and
secure a place and a share of happiness

1884
02:45:07.360 --> 02:45:11.360
by sheer calm determination. He had
his own corner in it, with his

1885
02:45:11.479 --> 02:45:16.920
books and his heraldry. Why did
she let herself be a victim to nervous

1886
02:45:16.959 --> 02:45:22.280
fancies? For it was all nerves, nothing but nerves. Cursed things were

1887
02:45:22.319 --> 02:45:26.959
nerves. How like her mother she
was, in spite of her liberal education,

1888
02:45:28.559 --> 02:45:33.600
dreamy, romantic, full of absurd
imagination. He speak to Frank,

1889
02:45:35.040 --> 02:45:39.159
Why what about? What was he
to say the lady at the lyceum,

1890
02:45:39.440 --> 02:45:43.680
this woman or that to whom he
had bowed, that might happen to anyone.

1891
02:45:45.040 --> 02:45:48.879
Eva was very absurd not to see
that it might. And as to

1892
02:45:48.920 --> 02:45:52.879
his talking it over with Frank,
why the young man would think that his

1893
02:45:52.000 --> 02:45:58.079
future father in law was a perfect
fool. There were thousands of such women

1894
02:45:58.120 --> 02:46:01.799
in London. Where was the young
man who had no acquaintance among them?

1895
02:46:01.920 --> 02:46:07.920
And the picture of disturbed peace,
of an unpleasant discussion which would destroy an

1896
02:46:07.920 --> 02:46:11.399
hour of perhaps a day, of
his Olympian repose, and tear him from

1897
02:46:11.440 --> 02:46:16.799
his studies rose up in his brain, a terror to his simple minded selfishness.

1898
02:46:18.079 --> 02:46:22.600
Come, Eva, this is sheer
folly, he good, humanly grumbled.

1899
02:46:24.319 --> 02:46:28.239
What good you think I can do? These are mere sickly fancies.

1900
02:46:28.559 --> 02:46:33.959
No, no, they are not
sickly fancies, not fancies at all.

1901
02:46:33.520 --> 02:46:39.399
It is something something quite different.
There is something in me, around me,

1902
02:46:39.879 --> 02:46:46.239
beyond my control. But child,
you are talking nonsense. When I

1903
02:46:46.360 --> 02:46:48.719
try to think it out, it
goes away for a little while, but

1904
02:46:48.840 --> 02:46:54.639
then it comes back again. Really, Eva, you must not talk so

1905
02:46:54.760 --> 02:46:58.040
foolishly. After all, what is
this story you have told me? What

1906
02:46:58.079 --> 02:47:01.799
does it all mean? It comes
and it goes, and it stays away,

1907
02:47:03.319 --> 02:47:07.120
and then again it comes and goes. She shook her head sadly,

1908
02:47:07.520 --> 02:47:13.280
sitting on the floor at his feet
in front of the fire. No,

1909
02:47:13.280 --> 02:47:16.760
no, she said, very positively. You do not understand. You are

1910
02:47:16.799 --> 02:47:20.440
a man. You do not understand
all there is in a woman. We

1911
02:47:20.639 --> 02:47:24.840
women are quite different. But you
will speak to him, will you not?

1912
02:47:24.159 --> 02:47:28.920
And ask him about it? No, Eva, that I certainly will

1913
02:47:28.959 --> 02:47:33.639
not. Frank might very well ask
me what business it was of mine.

1914
02:47:35.440 --> 02:47:39.440
You know as well as I do
that every man has or has had acquaintance

1915
02:47:39.479 --> 02:47:43.319
among such women. There is nothing
in that, And Frank strikes me as

1916
02:47:43.360 --> 02:47:46.719
too honorable to have anything to do
with one of them. Now that he

1917
02:47:46.799 --> 02:47:52.079
is engaged to you. I know
him too well to imagine that. It

1918
02:47:52.159 --> 02:47:58.479
is really too silly of you.
Do you hear too silly? She began

1919
02:47:58.600 --> 02:48:03.000
to sob passionately and a moan.
In an overpowering fit of grief. She

1920
02:48:03.120 --> 02:48:11.000
wrung her hands, rocking herself from
side to side as if suffering intolerable torments.

1921
02:48:11.639 --> 02:48:16.399
Oh Papa, she entreated, dear
Papa, do do do this for

1922
02:48:16.440 --> 02:48:20.760
your child's sake, you little Eva. Go to him, Talk to him.

1923
02:48:22.319 --> 02:48:26.040
I am so unhappy. I cannot
bear it. I am so wretched.

1924
02:48:26.559 --> 02:48:28.959
Speak to him. I cannot speak
of such a matter. I am

1925
02:48:30.000 --> 02:48:33.959
only a girl. It is all
so horrible, so sickening. Oh,

1926
02:48:33.000 --> 02:48:39.440
Papa, Papa, do speak to
Frank. She tried to lean coaxingly against

1927
02:48:39.440 --> 02:48:43.600
his knees, but he stood up. Her tears angered him and made him

1928
02:48:43.639 --> 02:48:48.680
more obstinate. His wife had never
got anything from him by tears, quite

1929
02:48:48.719 --> 02:48:54.799
the reverse. Eva was silly and
childish. He could not recognize his spirited

1930
02:48:54.879 --> 02:48:58.760
daughter, always indefatigable and bright,
with whom he had traveled half over the

1931
02:48:58.799 --> 02:49:05.840
world. World in this crushed creature
dissolved in woe. Stand up, Eva,

1932
02:49:05.200 --> 02:49:09.399
he said, sternly, Do not
crouch on the floor. You will

1933
02:49:09.520 --> 02:49:13.760
end by vexing me seriously by your
folly. What are you crying for?

1934
02:49:13.159 --> 02:49:18.360
For nothing? Pure foolish imagining.
I will have no more of it.

1935
02:49:18.639 --> 02:49:24.639
You must behave reasonably Get up.
Stand up. She dragged herself to her

1936
02:49:24.680 --> 02:49:28.520
feet, groaning as she did so, with a white face and clenched hands.

1937
02:49:30.760 --> 02:49:33.120
I cannot help it, she said, it is my nature. I

1938
02:49:33.159 --> 02:49:39.040
suppose. Have you no pity for
your child, even if you don't understand

1939
02:49:39.079 --> 02:49:43.000
her. Oh, go and speak
to him, only a few words,

1940
02:49:43.079 --> 02:49:48.719
I implore you. I beseech you. No, no, no, he

1941
02:49:48.879 --> 02:49:52.159
cried, stamping his foot, his
face quite red, as if from a

1942
02:49:52.200 --> 02:49:58.639
congestion of rage at all, this
useless, undefined vexation, and his daughter's

1943
02:49:58.680 --> 02:50:03.319
folly and weeping entry, which his
obstinacy urged him on no account to indulge.

1944
02:50:05.399 --> 02:50:09.680
She, however, rose, looking
taller in her despair. Her eyes

1945
02:50:09.760 --> 02:50:13.559
had a strange look as they gazed
into her father's. Then you will not

1946
02:50:13.639 --> 02:50:18.079
speak to Frank, You will not
do that much for me. No,

1947
02:50:18.719 --> 02:50:22.280
it is all nonsense. I tell
you, worry me about it no more.

1948
02:50:24.559 --> 02:50:28.120
Very well, then I must do
it, she said, gravely,

1949
02:50:28.479 --> 02:50:33.440
as if pronouncing some irrevocable decision,
and very slowly, without looking round,

1950
02:50:33.879 --> 02:50:39.920
without bidding him good night, she
left the room. It was as though

1951
02:50:39.040 --> 02:50:43.639
Sir Archibald was a total stranger,
as though there were no bond of tenderness

1952
02:50:43.680 --> 02:50:48.600
between her and her father, nothing
but the hostility of two antagonistic natures.

1953
02:50:50.479 --> 02:50:54.120
No, under their superficial affection,
they had had no feeling in common.

1954
02:50:54.479 --> 02:51:00.479
They had never really known, never
try to understand each other. She had

1955
02:51:00.520 --> 02:51:03.840
no sympathy with his old age,
he had none with her youth. They

1956
02:51:03.840 --> 02:51:11.360
were miles asunder a desert, a
pathless waste lay between them. They dwelt

1957
02:51:11.399 --> 02:51:15.799
apart, as completely as though they
were locked up in two shrines, where

1958
02:51:15.879 --> 02:51:20.520
each worshiped a different god. He
is my father, thought she as she

1959
02:51:20.600 --> 02:51:26.479
went along the passage. I am
his child. She could not understand it.

1960
02:51:26.479 --> 02:51:31.879
It was a mystery of nature that
scarcely seemed possible. He her father,

1961
02:51:33.440 --> 02:51:37.399
she his child, and yet he
could not feel her anguish, could

1962
02:51:37.399 --> 02:51:43.600
not see that it was anguish called
its folly and fancy, and a vehement

1963
02:51:43.760 --> 02:51:48.040
longing for her mother rose up in
her heart. She would have understood.

1964
02:51:48.159 --> 02:51:54.120
Mamma, mamma, she sobbed out, Oh, mamma, come back,

1965
02:51:54.600 --> 02:51:58.040
tell me what I can do.
Come as a ghost. I will not

1966
02:51:58.120 --> 02:52:01.760
be afraid of you. I'm so
lawn, so miserable, so miserable,

1967
02:52:03.239 --> 02:52:09.399
Come and haunt me. Come only
come in her room. In the darkness,

1968
02:52:09.639 --> 02:52:13.520
she watched for the ghost, but
it came not. The night hung

1969
02:52:13.639 --> 02:52:22.479
unbroken, like a black curtain behind
which there was nothing but emptiness. Twelve.

1970
02:52:24.680 --> 02:52:28.600
When Frank came to call next morning, he at once saw in her

1971
02:52:28.639 --> 02:52:33.239
face that she was greatly agitated.
What is the matter, dearest, he

1972
02:52:33.319 --> 02:52:39.319
asked. At first, she felt
weak. There was something so terrible and

1973
02:52:39.360 --> 02:52:43.280
then again so shocking. But she
commanded herself. She drew herself up in

1974
02:52:43.360 --> 02:52:50.399
her pretty self will, which gave
firmness to the childlike enthusiasm and womanly coyness

1975
02:52:50.399 --> 02:52:54.239
of her nature, like a sterner
background against which so much that was soft

1976
02:52:54.280 --> 02:53:01.200
and tender stood out and feeling above
all she stood alone, abandoned by her

1977
02:53:01.239 --> 02:53:07.040
father, she was determined to be
firm. Frank, I have no alternative,

1978
02:53:07.760 --> 02:53:13.639
she began, with the energy of
despair. I must talk matters over

1979
02:53:13.760 --> 02:53:18.159
with you, even before you answer
me. I am almost convinced that I

1980
02:53:18.200 --> 02:53:22.559
am wrong and think myself odious.
But still I must speak, for I

1981
02:53:22.559 --> 02:53:28.520
am too unhappy under this, all
this, to keep it all to myself

1982
02:53:28.559 --> 02:53:31.280
in silence is more than I can
bear. I can endure it no longer.

1983
02:53:31.319 --> 02:53:35.000
Frank. I ask Papa to speak
to you, but he will not.

1984
02:53:35.719 --> 02:53:39.680
Perhaps he is right, Still it
is not kind of him. For

1985
02:53:39.760 --> 02:53:45.399
now I must do it to myself. Even in the excited state of mind

1986
02:53:45.479 --> 02:53:50.239
she was in, she loathed this
cruel necessity, but she controlled herself and

1987
02:53:50.319 --> 02:53:56.840
went on That woman, Frank,
Frank, that woman. I could think

1988
02:53:56.879 --> 02:54:03.000
of nothing else but dear Eva,
Oh, let me speak I must speak.

1989
02:54:03.399 --> 02:54:07.440
I see that creature always at my
elbow. I smell her perfume,

1990
02:54:07.840 --> 02:54:11.440
I hear her voice. I cannot
get it out of my ears. She

1991
02:54:11.479 --> 02:54:16.840
shuddered violently, and the dreadful thing
came over her again, again, possessed

1992
02:54:16.920 --> 02:54:22.559
her, the ghostly hypnotism of that
eye, that whisper, that strange magnetic

1993
02:54:22.719 --> 02:54:30.719
power which her father could not understand. The words she spoke seemed prompted inspired

1994
02:54:30.760 --> 02:54:35.600
by that voice. Her expression and
attitude obeyed the coercion of that gaze in

1995
02:54:35.680 --> 02:54:41.079
her. Inmost soul, she felt
those eyes as black as nights. Oh

1996
02:54:41.120 --> 02:54:46.760
Frank, she cried, and the
tears came from nervous excitement and the fear

1997
02:54:46.879 --> 02:54:52.000
lest she should not have courage to
obey these promptings. I must, I

1998
02:54:52.159 --> 02:54:56.239
must ask you. Why when you
come to see me are you always so

1999
02:54:56.399 --> 02:55:01.639
grave and silent? So you were
not happy in my society? Why do

2000
02:55:01.680 --> 02:55:07.399
you evade all direct replies? Why
do you always tell me that there is

2001
02:55:07.440 --> 02:55:11.040
nothing the matter? That woman?
It is because of her, because you

2002
02:55:11.079 --> 02:55:16.200
still love her, better perhaps than
you love me, because you cannot forget

2003
02:55:16.280 --> 02:55:20.200
her, because she still is a
part of your life, a large part,

2004
02:55:20.719 --> 02:55:24.879
perhaps the largest, Oh, it
is such torture, such misery,

2005
02:55:26.319 --> 02:55:31.360
ever present misery. And I am
not meanly jealous, I have never been.

2006
02:55:31.840 --> 02:55:35.760
I quite understand your feeling about her
the first comer, though it is

2007
02:55:35.879 --> 02:55:39.319
dreadful. But you yourself are too
silent, too sad, And when I

2008
02:55:39.360 --> 02:55:43.600
think it's over, I doubt,
in spite of myself, Frank, in

2009
02:55:43.639 --> 02:55:48.639
spite of myself, I swear to
you, but the suspicion forces itself upon

2010
02:55:48.719 --> 02:55:56.479
me and overwhelms me. Greats God, why must it be? But Frank,

2011
02:55:56.000 --> 02:56:00.360
tell me I am a simpleton to
think so, and that she is

2012
02:56:00.399 --> 02:56:03.239
nothing to you any longer, nothing
at all. You never see her,

2013
02:56:03.280 --> 02:56:07.959
do you tell me? Tell me
the anguish of her soul? As she

2014
02:56:09.040 --> 02:56:13.879
spoke, was eloquent in her face, though disfigured with grief and pale with

2015
02:56:13.000 --> 02:56:20.479
the dead whiteness of a faded azalea
blossom, A convulsive pang pinched the corners

2016
02:56:20.520 --> 02:56:24.239
of her mouth, and a quivering
eyelids. She was indeed a martyr to

2017
02:56:24.360 --> 02:56:30.600
her own too vivid fancy, But
he, at this moment was incapable of

2018
02:56:30.639 --> 02:56:33.840
seeing her as a martyr. Her
words had roused in him a surge of

2019
02:56:33.920 --> 02:56:37.959
fury, such as he could remember
having felt, occasionally as a child,

2020
02:56:39.639 --> 02:56:43.280
lashed up, as it were,
by the blast of a hurricane, drowning

2021
02:56:43.360 --> 02:56:48.760
every other feeling, sweeping away every
other thought like dust before the storm.

2022
02:56:50.280 --> 02:56:54.760
It came blustering up at the notion
of his honesty being questioned, his perfect

2023
02:56:54.920 --> 02:57:00.760
candor, honor, and truth,
like a whirlwind of righteous indignation at such

2024
02:57:00.799 --> 02:57:05.639
injustice. For his own mind.
He could not conceive of such a doubt,

2025
02:57:05.079 --> 02:57:09.680
knowing himself to be honest, honorable, and true. His dark gray

2026
02:57:09.719 --> 02:57:16.440
eyes flashed between his deeply knit brows. His words came viciously from between his

2027
02:57:16.559 --> 02:57:20.719
set teeth, which shone large and
white under his mustache like polished ivory.

2028
02:57:22.920 --> 02:57:26.600
It is inconceivable, Good God,
this is monstrous. I have answered you

2029
02:57:26.879 --> 02:57:31.120
once and for all. I have
told you in plain words, no,

2030
02:57:31.120 --> 02:57:35.159
no, no, And you ask
me again and again. Do you think

2031
02:57:35.200 --> 02:57:39.239
I am a liar? Why have
you ever seen anything in me to make

2032
02:57:39.280 --> 02:57:43.719
you think I can lie? I
say no, and I mean no,

2033
02:57:43.280 --> 02:57:48.840
And you still have doubts. Still
you think and worry over it like an

2034
02:57:48.879 --> 02:57:52.040
old woman. Why do you not
take things as they are? You know

2035
02:57:52.120 --> 02:57:56.719
the facts. Why do you not
believe me? I am not sad,

2036
02:57:56.920 --> 02:58:00.600
I am not gloomy. I'm quite
happy with you. I love you.

2037
02:58:01.040 --> 02:58:05.280
I do not doubt you, but
you you believe me. If you go

2038
02:58:05.399 --> 02:58:09.120
on in this way, you will
make yourself miserable, and me too,

2039
02:58:09.479 --> 02:58:15.840
me too. She looked at him
steadfastly, and her pride rose up to

2040
02:58:15.879 --> 02:58:20.719
meet his wrath, for his words
offended her. You need not speak to

2041
02:58:20.760 --> 02:58:24.200
me in that tone, she answered, haughtily. When I tell you that

2042
02:58:24.319 --> 02:58:28.520
it is against my will, you
hear in spite of myself, that I

2043
02:58:28.559 --> 02:58:33.040
have doubts, and that this makes
me miserable. You need not take that

2044
02:58:33.159 --> 02:58:37.479
tone, have some pity on me, and do not speak like that.

2045
02:58:37.920 --> 02:58:43.719
But Eva, when I assure you. He began again, trembling with rage,

2046
02:58:45.120 --> 02:58:50.639
which he tried to control, forcing
himself to speak gently. When I

2047
02:58:50.719 --> 02:58:54.600
assure you, you had done so
already, and you doubt my word,

2048
02:58:56.360 --> 02:59:01.319
only in so far as you disbelieve
me, he roared, quite beside himself.

2049
02:59:03.360 --> 02:59:07.040
Only in so far as I think
you are keeping something back, She

2050
02:59:07.239 --> 02:59:13.559
cried, something back? What in
Heaven's name? His friend's name was on

2051
02:59:13.639 --> 02:59:18.280
her tongue. But as soon as
she thought of Bertie, hesitancy and indecision

2052
02:59:18.360 --> 02:59:22.920
took possession of her, for she
knew not what exactly Bertie had in fact

2053
02:59:22.959 --> 02:59:26.520
told her. It was always as
though Van Mehren had enclosed her in a

2054
02:59:26.559 --> 02:59:31.200
magic circle, a spell of silence
which made it impossible for her to mention

2055
02:59:31.399 --> 02:59:37.239
him. And even at this juncture, he was an intangible presence, his

2056
02:59:37.399 --> 02:59:43.559
name an unutterable word, his hints
a mere, inarticulate jangle. What what,

2057
02:59:43.239 --> 02:59:48.120
she gasped in bewilderment, Oh,
I do not know, if only

2058
02:59:48.159 --> 02:59:52.520
I knew, But you are concealing
something from me. Perhaps it is something

2059
02:59:52.520 --> 02:59:58.239
about her, that woman. But
when I tell you that she no,

2060
02:59:58.239 --> 03:00:05.360
no, she insisted, confirmed in
her imaginings by her offended pride. I

2061
03:00:05.479 --> 03:00:09.879
know, I know you men count
such matters as nothing, a thing of

2062
03:00:09.920 --> 03:00:13.399
the past. It is so all
the world over, you say, And

2063
03:00:13.520 --> 03:00:18.000
what I called something you call nothing. And so I say, there is

2064
03:00:18.079 --> 03:00:24.840
something that you are hiding. Frank
Eva, I swear, do not swear

2065
03:00:24.920 --> 03:00:28.079
to it, for that would be
a sin. She shrieked out, wrought

2066
03:00:28.200 --> 03:00:33.399
up in spite of herself to a
paroxysm of insane belief in a thing of

2067
03:00:33.399 --> 03:00:37.120
which she knew nothing certain. For
I feel it, I feel it here

2068
03:00:37.520 --> 03:00:43.719
in me, about me, everywhere. He seized her by the wrists,

2069
03:00:43.440 --> 03:00:48.920
carried away by his rage at her
rejecting his asseverations, wounded in his proud

2070
03:00:48.959 --> 03:00:56.000
consciousness of honor and truthfulness, and
amazed at the depth of her infatuated distrust.

2071
03:00:56.239 --> 03:01:00.000
Then you do not believe me,
he said, with an oath,

2072
03:01:00.520 --> 03:01:05.079
you do not believe me, and
for the second time, his tone offended

2073
03:01:05.079 --> 03:01:11.000
and enraged her. The exposure of
their two antagonistic natures, with all their

2074
03:01:11.040 --> 03:01:16.440
passions and infirmities, brought them into
collision. No, since you will have

2075
03:01:16.520 --> 03:01:20.000
it, No, she cried,
and she wrenched herself free from his vise

2076
03:01:20.239 --> 03:01:26.440
like grasp with such violence that her
slender wrists cracked. Now you know it.

2077
03:01:26.760 --> 03:01:31.079
I do not believe you. You
are hiding something from me, and

2078
03:01:31.159 --> 03:01:35.559
it has something to do with that
woman. I feel it, and what

2079
03:01:35.600 --> 03:01:41.360
I feel is to me undeniable.
That creature who dared to speak to you

2080
03:01:41.719 --> 03:01:46.479
has taken root in my imagination.
I feel her close to me, smell

2081
03:01:46.559 --> 03:01:50.440
her scent, and am so intensely
conscious that there is still something between you

2082
03:01:50.520 --> 03:01:54.639
and her that I am bold to
say to you. You lie, You

2083
03:01:54.879 --> 03:02:00.520
lie for her sake, and are
cheating me. With a sort of low

2084
03:02:00.600 --> 03:02:05.840
bellow, which broke from him involuntarily. He rushed at her, clenching his

2085
03:02:05.000 --> 03:02:11.319
fists, and she mechanically shrank back, But he seized her hands again and

2086
03:02:11.440 --> 03:02:16.600
closing them in his great, strong
fingers, so that she felt his power

2087
03:02:16.639 --> 03:02:22.159
through her flesh, in her very
bones. Oh, and it was like

2088
03:02:22.360 --> 03:02:26.799
muttering thunder. You have no heart, none that you can say such things

2089
03:02:26.840 --> 03:02:31.799
to me. You are base,
mean even to think them. You feel,

2090
03:02:31.840 --> 03:02:35.799
and you feel, Yes, it
is your own petty narrowness that you

2091
03:02:35.920 --> 03:02:41.319
feel. You have nothing in you
but base and contemptible incredulity. Your whole

2092
03:02:41.399 --> 03:02:46.600
nature is mean. Everything is at
an end between us. I have nothing

2093
03:02:46.639 --> 03:02:52.559
more to do with you. I
was mistaken in you. He flung her

2094
03:02:52.639 --> 03:02:58.200
off onto a sofa. There she
remained staring up at the ceiling with wide

2095
03:02:58.239 --> 03:03:03.959
open eyes. Yes, at the
moment, she was startled rather than angry,

2096
03:03:03.280 --> 03:03:07.799
and did not fully understand the state
of things. Her overwrought brain was

2097
03:03:07.840 --> 03:03:13.360
bewildered. She knew not what had
happened. For a minute, he stood

2098
03:03:13.399 --> 03:03:18.360
looking at her, His lips wore
a sneer of contempt, and his eyes

2099
03:03:18.680 --> 03:03:24.920
half closed in scorn, glanced over
her prostrate form. He saw how pretty

2100
03:03:24.959 --> 03:03:30.120
she was. Her graceful figure,
stretched on the Turkish pillows, revealed the

2101
03:03:30.159 --> 03:03:35.040
soft lines of its supple, girlish
mold through the clinging folds of a thin,

2102
03:03:35.159 --> 03:03:39.079
pale green material. Her hair,
which had come loose, hung to

2103
03:03:39.120 --> 03:03:45.639
the floor like the red gold fleece
of some rare wild creature. Her bosom

2104
03:03:45.719 --> 03:03:50.920
heaved with spasmodic rapidity. She lay
there like a ravished maid, flung aside.

2105
03:03:50.920 --> 03:03:56.280
In a fit of passion, he
saw all the charms that he had

2106
03:03:56.319 --> 03:04:01.120
forfeited. Deep wrath sprang up in
him, wild longing for the happiness he

2107
03:04:01.200 --> 03:04:09.200
had lost, But his injured honor
ousted regrets and longing, he turned away

2108
03:04:09.399 --> 03:04:13.120
and left her there. She remained
on the same spot, in the same

2109
03:04:13.159 --> 03:04:20.680
attitude. She was full of obscure
wonderment. Darkness had fallen on her soul,

2110
03:04:20.000 --> 03:04:26.120
as though after being entrapped by falsehood, blindfolded by doubt, she had

2111
03:04:26.159 --> 03:04:31.360
been led into a labyrinth, and
then suddenly released her eyes and bound in

2112
03:04:31.399 --> 03:04:37.600
a dark chamber. Her soul indeed
seemed to have bled to death. She

2113
03:04:37.639 --> 03:04:41.799
could not yet know how deeply it
was wounded, And in spite of her

2114
03:04:41.840 --> 03:04:48.879
intolerable grief. She still thought only
of the darkness about her. How strange,

2115
03:04:48.319 --> 03:04:58.040
she whispered, But why in Heaven's
name, why? Thirteen after this

2116
03:04:58.239 --> 03:05:03.319
there was a month peace. A
sudden calm had fallen on them, both

2117
03:05:03.879 --> 03:05:07.879
full for both alike of silent,
bitter grief, and with it all the

2118
03:05:07.920 --> 03:05:13.719
insignificant commonplace of ordinary life and the
recurring, monotonous tasks of every day.

2119
03:05:15.879 --> 03:05:20.319
Even Bertie found himself breathing this strange, stagnant air. He wondered greatly what

2120
03:05:20.520 --> 03:05:26.360
could have occurred, how simply,
how easily things had worked themselves out?

2121
03:05:26.159 --> 03:05:31.360
He no, he had done nothing, He could have done nothing. Events

2122
03:05:31.360 --> 03:05:35.479
had merely followed each other. What
had come about was the inevitable, and

2123
03:05:35.520 --> 03:05:39.799
the possibility of a life free from
care again lay before him an eternity of

2124
03:05:39.840 --> 03:05:45.639
comfort and wealth with Vestova, for
whom he felt his old affection revived with

2125
03:05:45.719 --> 03:05:50.280
the glow almost of a passion,
now that Frank severed from Eva. Though

2126
03:05:50.280 --> 03:05:56.879
blaming himself, indeed needed consolation and
sympathy, and Bertie's low, unctuous tones

2127
03:05:56.920 --> 03:06:01.440
were full of sympathy. Oh the
dark man. Melancholy of the first few

2128
03:06:01.520 --> 03:06:07.920
days, the terrible grief of wondering
when now his indignation cold, Frank asked

2129
03:06:07.000 --> 03:06:11.680
himself, as Eva had asked herself, why why had this happened? What

2130
03:06:11.879 --> 03:06:16.360
had he done? What had brought
it about? And he could not see,

2131
03:06:16.680 --> 03:06:22.000
could not understand. It was like
a book out of which leaves have

2132
03:06:22.159 --> 03:06:26.639
been torn so as to spoil the
sense. He could comprehend, neither himself

2133
03:06:26.680 --> 03:06:33.040
and his fury, nor Eva and
her doubts. All life seemed to him

2134
03:06:33.079 --> 03:06:37.360
a riddle. For hours together he
would sit gazing out of the window,

2135
03:06:37.920 --> 03:06:41.959
staring at the opaque, dullness of
the London fog, his eye fixed on

2136
03:06:41.079 --> 03:06:46.040
that riddle. He rarely went out, but sat dreaming in White Rose Cottage,

2137
03:06:46.360 --> 03:06:52.239
which was lonely and quiet enough in
its remote suburb and enovating indifference possessed

2138
03:06:52.280 --> 03:06:56.959
his stalwart's frame. For the first
time in his life, he saw himself

2139
03:06:58.000 --> 03:07:01.559
in a true light, and detected
the vacillation and weakness deep down in his

2140
03:07:01.680 --> 03:07:09.319
being, like a lymphatic stream traversing
his sanguine physical vigor. He saw himself

2141
03:07:09.360 --> 03:07:13.559
as a mere child in resistance to
the storm of rage. The blast of

2142
03:07:13.639 --> 03:07:18.159
fury, which had swept away his
happiness and his suffering, was so terrible

2143
03:07:18.280 --> 03:07:22.159
that he could not entirely comprehend it. It seemed too all embracing for the

2144
03:07:22.280 --> 03:07:30.079
human mind. These were days of
dreary gloom which they spent together, Frank

2145
03:07:30.159 --> 03:07:35.159
too dejected to go out of doors, Bertie creeping about very softly under the

2146
03:07:35.200 --> 03:07:41.319
pressure of a vague dread and indefinable
dissatisfaction. He felt Frank's friendship reviving,

2147
03:07:41.959 --> 03:07:46.840
and flattered by this revival, was
conscious of a sentiment of pity, almost

2148
03:07:46.920 --> 03:07:52.879
of sympathy. He tried to rouse
Frank from his moodiness and talked of a

2149
03:07:52.920 --> 03:07:58.280
supper party with ladies on the old
pattern. He made plans for going away

2150
03:07:58.520 --> 03:08:03.200
here or there for a few days. Es He tried to persuade Vestovah to

2151
03:08:03.239 --> 03:08:07.360
take to work, mentioning the names
of various great engineers who were to be

2152
03:08:07.399 --> 03:08:13.440
found in London. But everything fell
dead against Frank's obdurate melancholy. Everything was

2153
03:08:13.479 --> 03:08:18.159
swallowed up in the dark cloud of
his dejection, which seemed incapable of more

2154
03:08:18.200 --> 03:08:22.879
than one idea, one self reproach, one grief. Had. The only

2155
03:08:22.959 --> 03:08:26.479
solace of his life was always to
have Bertie at his side, a closer

2156
03:08:26.520 --> 03:08:31.600
intimacy to which Van Mahern himself was
no less prompted now that he had gained

2157
03:08:31.600 --> 03:08:37.280
his selfish ends, having no further
fear of impending poverty, and seeing always

2158
03:08:37.319 --> 03:08:43.559
by him a consuming sorrow. Had
he not rejected the notion that he had

2159
03:08:43.600 --> 03:08:46.040
been the cause of it all,
and had he not, during his late

2160
03:08:46.120 --> 03:08:52.239
existence as an idle bachelor, become
so super fine a being that he felt

2161
03:08:52.239 --> 03:08:56.079
a craving for the vague delights of
sympathy, nothing more than sympathy, Since

2162
03:08:56.159 --> 03:09:01.879
no greater and noble love, no
strong and generous friendship, could breathe in

2163
03:09:01.959 --> 03:09:05.120
the complicated recesses of his soul,
for lack of room and fresh air in

2164
03:09:05.159 --> 03:09:11.079
those narrow cells built up on strange
fallacies, And since love and friendship must

2165
03:09:11.079 --> 03:09:18.079
pine and die there like a lion
in a boudoir. Thus it was that

2166
03:09:18.159 --> 03:09:22.000
he could still feel, for Frank, could lay his hand on his shoulders

2167
03:09:22.079 --> 03:09:26.479
and try to comfort him, could
find words of affection new on his lips,

2168
03:09:26.840 --> 03:09:31.920
and unwanted phrases of consolation or cheering. Women, he would say,

2169
03:09:31.200 --> 03:09:35.079
were so narrow minded, they were
nothing, They loved nothing, They were

2170
03:09:35.120 --> 03:09:41.319
a mere illusion. No man should
ever make himself miserable for a woman there

2171
03:09:41.399 --> 03:09:46.120
was nothing like friendship, which women
could not even understand and never felt for

2172
03:09:46.159 --> 03:09:50.879
each other, a passion of sympathy, the noble joy of affinity and agreement.

2173
03:09:52.239 --> 03:09:56.040
And he believed what he said,
sunning himself in platonism with cats like

2174
03:09:56.120 --> 03:10:01.559
complacency, just as he basked in
materi real ease and comfort, rejoicing in

2175
03:10:01.639 --> 03:10:09.399
his raptures of friendship and admiring himself
for his lofty ideals. But Frank's love

2176
03:10:09.479 --> 03:10:15.879
for Eva had been and was still
so absorbing that he erelong saw through this

2177
03:10:16.120 --> 03:10:22.840
feats and decrepit devotion, and thenceforward
it afforded him no solace. His depression

2178
03:10:22.920 --> 03:10:28.120
wrapped him in darker folds. He
forced himself to recall exactly everything that had

2179
03:10:28.120 --> 03:10:33.639
happened, what Eva had said,
what he had replied, and he laid

2180
03:10:33.680 --> 03:10:39.440
all the blame on himself, exonerating
Eva for her doubts. He cursed his

2181
03:10:39.520 --> 03:10:43.959
own temper, his barbarous violence to
a woman and to her what was to

2182
03:10:45.000 --> 03:10:50.360
be done? Parted, parted forever. It was a fearful thought that he

2183
03:10:50.440 --> 03:10:54.280
might never see her again, that
she could be nothing henceforth in his life?

2184
03:10:54.639 --> 03:11:01.280
Could it be not? Otherwise?
Was all lost? Irrevocably. No,

2185
03:11:01.280 --> 03:11:05.399
no, no, The desperate denial
rose up within him. He would

2186
03:11:05.479 --> 03:11:11.280
triumph over circumstances. He would win
back his happiness. And she, how

2187
03:11:11.360 --> 03:11:15.200
was she? Was she too suffering? Did she still doubt him? Or

2188
03:11:15.239 --> 03:11:20.319
had his vehemence, notwithstanding its brutality, made his innocence clear. But if

2189
03:11:20.319 --> 03:11:24.639
it were so, if she no
longer doubted him, and how could she?

2190
03:11:24.200 --> 03:11:28.360
Good? Heavens, how wretched she
must be, grieving over her want

2191
03:11:28.399 --> 03:11:33.920
of trust, with self accusation even
more terrible than his own, For his

2192
03:11:33.079 --> 03:11:39.559
wrath had at any rate been justifiable
and her suspicions were not. Was it

2193
03:11:39.680 --> 03:11:43.079
so? Or was she, on
the contrary, stricken almost to death,

2194
03:11:43.239 --> 03:11:46.680
perhaps by his cruelty, or filled
with contempt for his lack of power to

2195
03:11:46.760 --> 03:11:52.280
control his anger, which was like
some raging wild beast? How was she?

2196
03:11:52.600 --> 03:11:58.360
What was her mood? A passionate
desire to know pierced his heart now

2197
03:11:58.360 --> 03:12:01.399
and again, like a sword thrust
to go to her, to pray for

2198
03:12:01.520 --> 03:12:05.639
pardon, for restoration to the happiness
he had thrown away as he had flung

2199
03:12:05.680 --> 03:12:11.319
her from him on that sofa.
She would never admit him to her presence

2200
03:12:11.319 --> 03:12:16.879
after so great an insult that he
might write, of course, a letter.

2201
03:12:18.000 --> 03:12:22.920
His heart leapt with joy but bliss
to grovel on paper in the dust

2202
03:12:22.959 --> 03:12:28.479
at her feet, to humble himself
in penitential prayers for mercy and adoring words,

2203
03:12:28.920 --> 03:12:33.239
while asserting his dignity and the pride
of his truth and his anguish under

2204
03:12:33.239 --> 03:12:37.959
her doubts. She would hearken as
a madonna to a sinner. He would

2205
03:12:37.959 --> 03:12:43.799
recover his lost happiness. Had he
tried to compose his letter, thrilling with

2206
03:12:43.879 --> 03:12:48.520
the effort to find words which still
did not seem fervent or humble enough,

2207
03:12:50.799 --> 03:12:54.040
he spent a whole day over his
task, polishing his phrases as a poet

2208
03:12:54.120 --> 03:12:58.440
does a sonnet, And when at
last it was finished, he felt refreshed

2209
03:12:58.479 --> 03:13:05.879
in spirit, with renewed hopes a
complete resurrection. He was convinced that his

2210
03:13:05.040 --> 03:13:11.319
letter would remove every misunderstanding between him
and Eva. In the highest spirits,

2211
03:13:11.399 --> 03:13:16.239
he betook himself to Van Mehreen,
told his friend of the step he had

2212
03:13:16.239 --> 03:13:20.040
taken and all he hoped for.
He spoke eagerly. His very voice was

2213
03:13:20.159 --> 03:13:26.399
changed. Bertie leaned back in his
chair, rather grave and pale, but

2214
03:13:26.520 --> 03:13:31.200
he controlled himself so far as to
smile in answer to Vestov's smile, and

2215
03:13:31.360 --> 03:13:35.479
he agreed in his anticipations, in
words to which he vainly strove to give

2216
03:13:35.520 --> 03:13:41.920
a ring of conviction. To be
sure, of course, everything must come

2217
03:13:41.000 --> 03:13:46.840
right again, he muttered, and
the perspiration stood on his forehead under his

2218
03:13:46.000 --> 03:13:56.200
chestnut curls fourteen. But an hour
later, alone in his room that evening,

2219
03:13:56.520 --> 03:14:01.920
he walked to and fro with such
seething agitation has set every nerve quivering

2220
03:14:01.000 --> 03:14:07.760
in his slight frame as a storm
tosses a rowing boat. His soft features

2221
03:14:07.760 --> 03:14:11.760
were distorted to a hideous expression of
malignancy. With rage at his own impotence,

2222
03:14:13.280 --> 03:14:16.799
had he strode up and down,
up and down like a beast in

2223
03:14:16.879 --> 03:14:20.879
a cage, clenching his fists.
Then it was for this that he had

2224
03:14:20.879 --> 03:14:26.680
elaborated his tastes, had sharpened and
polished all his natural gifts, and had

2225
03:14:26.719 --> 03:14:33.159
directed all the powers of his mind
like a battery charged with some mysterious fluid,

2226
03:14:33.479 --> 03:14:37.040
on the secrets of a girl's love
and life. A single letter,

2227
03:14:37.520 --> 03:14:41.280
a few pages of tender words,
and the whole work would be destroyed.

2228
03:14:43.440 --> 03:14:46.440
But now, in his wrath,
he suddenly saw and prided himself on the

2229
03:14:46.479 --> 03:14:52.799
fact, he saw that he very
certainly he had guided events to sever frankened

2230
03:14:52.799 --> 03:14:58.440
Eva, how could he, even
for a moment have doubted it? And

2231
03:14:58.559 --> 03:15:03.399
it was all to come to naught, never, never, no, a

2232
03:15:03.479 --> 03:15:09.840
thousand times no, awful and infinitely
far as the horizon, the perspective of

2233
03:15:09.879 --> 03:15:13.600
life yawned before him, the dead
level of poverty, the barren desert in

2234
03:15:13.639 --> 03:15:18.520
which he must pine and perish of
hunger. And in his horror of treading

2235
03:15:18.559 --> 03:15:24.040
that wilderness, every sinew of his
lax resolve seemed strained to the verge of

2236
03:15:24.079 --> 03:15:31.920
snapping. He must take steps forthwith
an idea flashed through his brain like the

2237
03:15:31.000 --> 03:15:37.639
zigzag of forked lightning. Yes,
that was his only course, the simplest

2238
03:15:37.639 --> 03:15:41.319
and most obvious means, a mere
stroke of villainy, as conventionality would term

2239
03:15:41.360 --> 03:15:48.159
it. No need here for any
elaborate psychological pros and cons They were never

2240
03:15:48.200 --> 03:15:54.280
of any use. They got entangled
in their uncomplications, simply a theatrical coup.

2241
03:15:56.399 --> 03:16:00.200
He took his hat and crept quietly
out of the house, with a

2242
03:16:00.079 --> 03:16:05.000
near of contempt, of scorn for
himself that he should have fallen so low.

2243
03:16:05.120 --> 03:16:09.040
It was half past ten. He
hailed a cab and laughed to hear

2244
03:16:09.079 --> 03:16:15.200
the melodramatic sound of his own voice
as he gave the driver Sir Archibald's address,

2245
03:16:15.799 --> 03:16:20.360
the voice of a stage traitor.
Then he shrank into a corner of

2246
03:16:20.399 --> 03:16:24.639
the vehicle, his shoulders up to
his ears, his eyes half closed,

2247
03:16:24.680 --> 03:16:30.200
and gazing out through the dim mystery
of the night, deadly melancholy lurked at

2248
03:16:30.200 --> 03:16:35.559
the bottom of his soul. He
got out near Sir Archibald's house, walked

2249
03:16:35.600 --> 03:16:39.440
a few yards to the door,
and rang. And the minutes he waited

2250
03:16:39.440 --> 03:16:45.079
in the darkness before the closed house
seemed an eternity of intolerable misery, of

2251
03:16:45.159 --> 03:16:50.360
horror, aversion loathing of himself.
His lips were pinched into a grimace of

2252
03:16:50.399 --> 03:16:56.600
disgust. A manservant opened the door
with a look of surprise at the belated

2253
03:16:56.680 --> 03:17:01.520
visitor, a surprise which gave way
to an impertinent stare when he saw that

2254
03:17:01.639 --> 03:17:07.000
Van Mehren was alone, without vestover. He bowed with insolent irony and held

2255
03:17:07.040 --> 03:17:13.360
the door wide open with exaggerated civility
for Bertie to enter. I must speak

2256
03:17:13.360 --> 03:17:18.559
with you at once, said Bertie
coolly, At once, and alone.

2257
03:17:18.799 --> 03:17:22.520
The man looked at him, but
said nothing. You can do me a

2258
03:17:22.600 --> 03:17:28.200
service. I need your assistance pressingly. Can I say two words to you

2259
03:17:28.280 --> 03:17:33.440
without being seen by anyone? Now, said the servant, Yes, now,

2260
03:17:33.479 --> 03:17:37.799
without delay? Will you come in
into the servants hall? No?

2261
03:17:37.799 --> 03:17:41.200
No, come out and walk up
and down with me and speak low.

2262
03:17:43.200 --> 03:17:46.479
I cannot leave the house yet.
The old man will be going to bed

2263
03:17:46.520 --> 03:17:48.399
in an hour or so, and
then I can join you in the street.

2264
03:17:50.319 --> 03:17:52.879
Then I will wait for you opposite
by the park railings. You will

2265
03:17:52.879 --> 03:17:56.760
be sure to come. I will
make it worth your while. The footman

2266
03:17:56.840 --> 03:18:01.920
laughed, a loud, brazen laugh
which rang through the hall, filling Bertie

2267
03:18:01.920 --> 03:18:07.200
with alarm. Then you are a
gentleman now and pretty flush, eh,

2268
03:18:07.399 --> 03:18:13.719
yes, said Van Mehren hoarsely.
Then you will come, yes, yes,

2269
03:18:13.959 --> 03:18:16.920
in an hour, or more fully
an hour wait for me. But

2270
03:18:18.040 --> 03:18:20.760
if I am to do anything for
you, you will have to fork out,

2271
03:18:20.840 --> 03:18:24.000
you know, and fork out handsomely
too. All right, all right,

2272
03:18:24.360 --> 03:18:28.639
said Bertie, But I hope you
will not fail me. I count

2273
03:18:28.639 --> 03:18:33.440
on your coming. Mind. The
door was ruthlessly shut. He walked up

2274
03:18:33.440 --> 03:18:37.680
and down for a very long time
in the cold and damp. The chill

2275
03:18:37.799 --> 03:18:43.159
pierced to his very marrow, while
the twinkling gas lamp stared at him through

2276
03:18:43.159 --> 03:18:48.079
the gray mist like watery eyes.
He waited, pacing the pavement for an

2277
03:18:48.079 --> 03:18:52.479
hour an hour and a half,
perishing a fatigue and cold, like a

2278
03:18:52.520 --> 03:18:58.120
beggar without a shelter. Still he
waited, shivering as he walked, his

2279
03:18:58.239 --> 03:19:03.159
hands in his pot, his eyes
dull with self contempt, staring out of

2280
03:19:03.239 --> 03:19:07.719
his white face at the dark square
of the door, which still remains shut.

2281
03:19:09.840 --> 03:19:22.840
End of section five, Section six
of Footsteps of Fate by Louis Kuperus.

2282
03:19:24.079 --> 03:19:30.799
This library vox recording is in the
public domain. Part three fifteen to

2283
03:19:30.879 --> 03:19:37.239
eighteen fifteen. When after a few
days of anxious expectancy, Frank still had

2284
03:19:37.239 --> 03:19:41.799
no answer from Eva, he wrote
a second time, and although the first

2285
03:19:41.840 --> 03:19:46.799
bloom of his revived hopes was already
dying, he started whenever the bell rang

2286
03:19:48.159 --> 03:19:52.040
and would go to the letterbox in
the front door. His thoughts were constantly

2287
03:19:52.079 --> 03:19:56.840
busy with picturing the messenger who was
walking up the road with his happiness wrapped

2288
03:19:56.920 --> 03:20:01.559
up in an envelope, and he
would imagine what, ever's answer might be,

2289
03:20:01.600 --> 03:20:07.319
just a few lines somewhat cool,
perhaps in her large, bold English

2290
03:20:07.319 --> 03:20:11.879
hand on the scented ivory laid paper
she always used, with her initials crossed

2291
03:20:11.920 --> 03:20:16.719
in pink and silver in one corner. How long she took to write that

2292
03:20:16.879 --> 03:20:20.600
answer? Was she angry? How
could she not make up her mind how

2293
03:20:20.680 --> 03:20:26.719
to word her forgiveness? Was she
elaborating her letter as he had elaborated his

2294
03:20:28.000 --> 03:20:31.319
had The days went by while he
waited for that note. When he was

2295
03:20:31.360 --> 03:20:37.879
at home, he pictured the postman
coming nearer and nearer, now only four

2296
03:20:37.319 --> 03:20:41.639
three, two doors away. Now
he would ring, and he listened,

2297
03:20:41.959 --> 03:20:46.200
but the bell did not sound,
or if it did, it was not

2298
03:20:46.479 --> 03:20:50.920
by reason of the letter. When
he was out, he would be electrified

2299
03:20:50.959 --> 03:20:54.079
by the thought, for the letter
must be lying at home. And he

2300
03:20:54.159 --> 03:20:58.399
hurried back to White Rose Cottage,
looked in the letter box, and then

2301
03:20:58.399 --> 03:21:03.399
in the sitting room, but he
never found it, and the intolerable emptiness

2302
03:21:03.479 --> 03:21:07.399
of the place where he looked for
it made him swear and stamp with rage.

2303
03:21:07.639 --> 03:21:11.760
Twice he had written two letters,
and yet she gave no sign,

2304
03:21:13.120 --> 03:21:16.040
and he could think of no cause
in his ardent expectancy, which made him

2305
03:21:16.040 --> 03:21:22.000
regard it as the most natural thing
that she should reply at once. Still

2306
03:21:22.319 --> 03:21:26.680
he lived on this waiting. The
reply must come. It could not be

2307
03:21:26.760 --> 03:21:31.200
otherwise. His brain held no other
thought than it is coming. It would

2308
03:21:31.239 --> 03:21:35.799
come to day. All life was
void and flat, but it could be

2309
03:21:35.879 --> 03:21:41.239
filled by just one letter. Day
followed day, and there was no change.

2310
03:21:43.440 --> 03:21:46.360
I've had no answer yet from Eva, he said, in a subdued

2311
03:21:46.399 --> 03:21:52.319
tone to Bertie, as feeling himself
humiliated, disgraced by her determined silence,

2312
03:21:52.680 --> 03:21:58.760
mocked at in his illusory hopes.
Not yet, said Bertie, and a

2313
03:21:58.840 --> 03:22:03.840
mist of melancholy glistened in his black, velvety eyes. Await indeed lay on

2314
03:22:03.920 --> 03:22:09.840
his mind. He sighed deeply and
frequently. He really was unhappy. What

2315
03:22:11.000 --> 03:22:15.319
he had done was so utterly base, But it was all Frank's fault.

2316
03:22:16.600 --> 03:22:20.000
Why now that he was parted from
Eva, could he not forget his passion?

2317
03:22:20.440 --> 03:22:26.360
Why could he not find sufficient comfort
in the sweets of friendship. How

2318
03:22:26.399 --> 03:22:30.479
delightful it might have been to live
on together, a happy pair of friends,

2319
03:22:30.879 --> 03:22:33.600
under the calm, blue sky of
brotherhood, in the golden bliss of

2320
03:22:33.680 --> 03:22:41.200
perfect sympathy, with no woman to
disturb it. Thus he romanced, consciously,

2321
03:22:41.280 --> 03:22:45.920
working up his friendly, compassionate feeling
towards Frank to a sort of frenzy,

2322
03:22:46.280 --> 03:22:50.319
in the hope of comforting himself a
little and forgetting his foul deed,

2323
03:22:50.719 --> 03:22:56.239
of convincing himself that he was magnanimous. Nay, that in spite of that

2324
03:22:56.280 --> 03:22:58.799
little deception, he now, more
than ever since he was sunk in the

2325
03:22:58.840 --> 03:23:05.120
mind, really longed for a high
ideal. It was all Frank's fault.

2326
03:23:05.520 --> 03:23:11.000
And yet was Frank to blame because
he could not forget eva. No,

2327
03:23:11.000 --> 03:23:16.000
No, that was all fatality.
No one was to blame for that.

2328
03:23:16.000 --> 03:23:20.159
That was the act of fate.
Yes, that is certain, thought he.

2329
03:23:20.600 --> 03:23:24.000
But why have we brains to think
with? And why do we feel

2330
03:23:24.040 --> 03:23:30.280
pain if we can do nothing to
help ourselves? Why are we not plants

2331
03:23:30.360 --> 03:23:35.719
or stones? Why should this vast, useless universe exist at all? And

2332
03:23:35.799 --> 03:23:41.479
why why did nothingness cease to be? How peaceful? How delightfully peaceful that

2333
03:23:41.680 --> 03:23:46.479
would be? He stud as it
were before the sealed portals of the Great

2334
03:23:46.600 --> 03:23:52.719
Enigma, suddenly amazed and horrified at
himself. Good God, how had he

2335
03:23:52.799 --> 03:23:58.040
come to this? How was it
that nowadays he was always thinking of such

2336
03:23:58.120 --> 03:24:03.360
things? Had he ever had such
notions in America? When he was toiling

2337
03:24:03.399 --> 03:24:07.040
and tramping in his daily slavery.
Had he not then regarded himself as a

2338
03:24:07.040 --> 03:24:13.079
gross materialist, caring for nothing but
plenty of good food and unbroken peace?

2339
03:24:13.000 --> 03:24:18.719
And now, when he had long
experience of such material comforts, now he

2340
03:24:18.799 --> 03:24:24.399
felt as though his nerves had been
spun finer and finer to mere silken threads,

2341
03:24:24.479 --> 03:24:28.920
thrilling and quivering under one emotion after
another, vibrating like the invisible aerial

2342
03:24:30.000 --> 03:24:35.639
pulsations which are irresistibly transmitted with a
musical murmur along the telephone wires overhead.

2343
03:24:37.760 --> 03:24:41.520
How had he come by all this
philosophy the blossom of his idle hours,

2344
03:24:43.079 --> 03:24:46.840
And in his bewilderment, he tried
to recall his youth and remember whether he

2345
03:24:46.879 --> 03:24:52.799
had then had this predisposition to thought, whether he had then had any books

2346
03:24:52.840 --> 03:24:56.440
which had impressed him deeply, tried
to picture his parents, and whether this

2347
03:24:56.600 --> 03:25:03.760
might be hereditary he he had handed
round coffee cups in New York. Was

2348
03:25:03.799 --> 03:25:09.120
he not, after all happier in
those days and freer from care? Or

2349
03:25:09.120 --> 03:25:15.000
was it only that distance lent enchantment
to the view, the distance of so

2350
03:25:15.159 --> 03:25:22.399
few years sixteen, when Frank,
after a few days of death in life

2351
03:25:22.559 --> 03:25:28.680
patience had still received no answer,
he wrote to Sir Archibald. Still the

2352
03:25:28.760 --> 03:25:35.520
same silence, he poured out his
grief to Bertie in bitter complaint, no

2353
03:25:35.639 --> 03:25:39.719
longer humble, but full of wrath, like an enraged animal, and yet

2354
03:25:39.920 --> 03:25:43.920
half woeful at the ill feeling shown
by Eva and her father. Was it

2355
03:25:45.000 --> 03:25:48.639
not enough that he had three times
craved forgiveness? Had Eva cared for him,

2356
03:25:48.680 --> 03:25:52.680
in fact, so little that when
he groveled at her feet, she

2357
03:25:52.719 --> 03:25:56.000
could find no word even to tell
him that all was at an end.

2358
03:25:58.120 --> 03:26:01.120
I cannot now remember all I said, he told Bertie, as he paced

2359
03:26:01.120 --> 03:26:05.200
the room with long, equal and
determined steps. But I must have been

2360
03:26:05.239 --> 03:26:09.920
hard upon her. God help me. I can never govern my speech.

2361
03:26:09.319 --> 03:26:15.159
And I seized her. I recollect
so by the arms, and then I

2362
03:26:15.239 --> 03:26:18.000
came away. I was too furious. I ought not to have done it.

2363
03:26:18.319 --> 03:26:24.360
But I cannot keep cool. I
cannot frank. I wish you could

2364
03:26:24.399 --> 03:26:28.920
get over it, said Bertie soothingly
from the depths of his arm chair.

2365
03:26:28.600 --> 03:26:33.479
There is nothing now to be done. It is very sad that it should

2366
03:26:33.479 --> 03:26:37.920
have happened. So, but you
must throw it off. Throw it off.

2367
03:26:37.159 --> 03:26:41.520
Were you ever in love with a
woman, certainly then you must know

2368
03:26:41.639 --> 03:26:46.159
something of it, But you could
never love any one much. It's not

2369
03:26:46.239 --> 03:26:50.079
in your nature. You love yourself
too well. That may be, But

2370
03:26:50.159 --> 03:26:54.159
at any rate I love you,
and I cannot bear to see you.

2371
03:26:54.239 --> 03:26:58.360
Thus, Frank, get over it. They seem to have taken the whole

2372
03:26:58.399 --> 03:27:01.680
business so ill there is nothing more
to be done. I wish you would

2373
03:27:01.680 --> 03:27:07.360
only see that and submit to the
inevitable. Try to live for something else.

2374
03:27:07.159 --> 03:27:11.799
Can there be no other woman in
the world for you? Perhaps there

2375
03:27:11.840 --> 03:27:15.520
is another. A man does not
perish so for love. You are not

2376
03:27:15.600 --> 03:27:20.799
a girl. Girls do so.
He gazed at Frank with such a magnetic

2377
03:27:20.920 --> 03:27:24.200
light in his eyes that Vestova fancied. There was a great truth in his

2378
03:27:24.280 --> 03:27:31.600
words, and Bertie's last reproof reminded
him of his vacillation, his miserable weakness,

2379
03:27:31.719 --> 03:27:37.120
which lay beneath his manly and powerful
exterior like an insecure foundation. Still,

2380
03:27:37.200 --> 03:27:41.799
he clung to his passionate longings,
his vehement craving for the happiness he

2381
03:27:41.840 --> 03:27:48.360
had lost. You cannot possibly judge
of the matter, he retorted, impatiently,

2382
03:27:48.760 --> 03:27:52.879
trying to escape from Van Mehren's eye. You never did love a woman,

2383
03:27:52.079 --> 03:27:56.799
though you may say so. Why
should not everything come right again.

2384
03:27:56.399 --> 03:28:01.120
What has happened? After all?
What have I done? I fell into

2385
03:28:01.159 --> 03:28:05.959
a violent, vulgar rage? What
then, is that so unpardonable in the

2386
03:28:05.000 --> 03:28:09.680
person you love? But perhaps,
I say, can I have addressed the

2387
03:28:09.760 --> 03:28:15.399
letters wrongly? During a few seconds
there was a weight of silence in the

2388
03:28:15.479 --> 03:28:20.920
room, an atmosphere of lead.
Then Van Meyrn said, and his voice

2389
03:28:20.920 --> 03:28:24.000
had a tender, coaxing tone.
If you had written but once, I

2390
03:28:24.120 --> 03:28:30.000
might think it's possible. But three
letters to the same house it is scarcely

2391
03:28:30.040 --> 03:28:35.440
possible. I will go myself and
call, said Vesthova. Yes, yes,

2392
03:28:35.760 --> 03:28:39.639
I will go myself. What are
you saying? Asked Bertie dreamily.

2393
03:28:41.440 --> 03:28:45.520
He was still under the influence of
that heavy moral atmosphere. He had not

2394
03:28:45.719 --> 03:28:50.440
quite understood nor grasp the idea.
What was it you said? He repeated,

2395
03:28:52.520 --> 03:28:56.239
I shall go myself and call at
the house. Frank reiterated, at

2396
03:28:56.280 --> 03:29:01.639
what house? Where? Why?
At the roads on eva? Are you

2397
03:29:01.719 --> 03:29:07.840
daft? But Bercy rose to his
feet, and his eyes glittered in his

2398
03:29:07.959 --> 03:29:13.600
pale face like black diamonds with a
hundred facets. What to do there?

2399
03:29:13.079 --> 03:29:18.360
He said, with a convulsive effort
in his throat to keep his voice calm

2400
03:29:18.559 --> 03:29:22.479
to talk to her and set matters
straight. I cannot bear it. It

2401
03:29:22.520 --> 03:29:28.719
has gone on too long. You
are a fool, said Van Merin shortly.

2402
03:29:28.319 --> 03:29:31.959
Why am I a fool? Whilere
you a fool? You have not

2403
03:29:33.120 --> 03:29:37.719
a grain of self respect? Do
you really think of going there? Yes?

2404
03:29:37.760 --> 03:29:43.280
Of course I consider it absurd,
said Bertie. All right, said

2405
03:29:43.319 --> 03:29:48.879
Frank Pray think so, I myself
can see that this is very weak of

2406
03:29:48.920 --> 03:29:52.799
me. But good God, I
can hold out no longer. I love

2407
03:29:52.840 --> 03:29:56.319
her. So I was so happy, life was so sweet, and now

2408
03:29:56.479 --> 03:30:01.719
now by my own fault, I
do not care what you think about it,

2409
03:30:01.079 --> 03:30:05.159
absurd or not. I mean to
go all the same. In his

2410
03:30:05.319 --> 03:30:09.760
distress of mind, he had thrown
himself into a chair, and every muscle

2411
03:30:09.799 --> 03:30:16.079
of his features was quivering with agitation. But he went on, I do

2412
03:30:16.120 --> 03:30:18.520
not know what it is that I
feel. I am so unhappy, so

2413
03:30:18.719 --> 03:30:22.799
deeply, deeply wretched. Never in
my life had I known what it was

2414
03:30:22.879 --> 03:30:28.840
to feel so content in such harmonious
equilibrium of soul as when I was with

2415
03:30:28.000 --> 03:30:31.799
Eva. At least, so it
seems to me now. And now it

2416
03:30:31.920 --> 03:30:37.399
is all at an end, and
everything seems aimless. I no longer know

2417
03:30:37.479 --> 03:30:41.680
why I live and move and eat
and have my being. Why should I

2418
03:30:41.719 --> 03:30:46.479
take all that trouble and then have
this misery into the bargain. I might

2419
03:30:46.600 --> 03:30:50.399
just as well be dead, you
see. That is why I mean to

2420
03:30:50.440 --> 03:30:54.520
call there. And if things do
not come right, then well I shall

2421
03:30:54.520 --> 03:30:56.959
make an end of myself. Yes, yes, I shall make an end

2422
03:30:58.000 --> 03:31:03.399
of myself by the burthen of life. He lay back in his chair,

2423
03:31:03.760 --> 03:31:07.680
with his features set, his great
limbs stretched out in their useless strength,

2424
03:31:09.319 --> 03:31:13.719
all his power, and a mind
by the mysterious inertia which gnawed it away

2425
03:31:13.840 --> 03:31:18.760
like a worm. Before him stood
Van Mehren, drawn to his full height

2426
03:31:18.840 --> 03:31:22.520
and the energy of despair, and
his flashing eyes darting sparks of fire.

2427
03:31:24.559 --> 03:31:30.239
He laid his tremulous hands on Vestova's
shoulders, feeling their massive breadth, heavy

2428
03:31:30.280 --> 03:31:35.760
and strong. A reaction electrified him
with something like defiance. He scorned this

2429
03:31:35.879 --> 03:31:41.399
man of might in his love sickness. But above all, oh, above

2430
03:31:41.440 --> 03:31:45.959
all, he felt himself being dragged
down to the lowest deep. And it

2431
03:31:46.040 --> 03:31:50.840
was with the tenacity of a parasitic
growth that he clung to Frank, setting

2432
03:31:50.879 --> 03:31:56.200
his fingers into his shoulders. Frank, he began almost hoarsely. Just listen

2433
03:31:56.280 --> 03:32:01.280
to me. You're making yourself ill. You talk like a fool, and

2434
03:32:01.319 --> 03:32:05.239
then you cry out just like a
baby. You must get over it,

2435
03:32:05.600 --> 03:32:09.719
show a little more pluck. Do
not mar your whole life by these foolish

2436
03:32:09.840 --> 03:32:15.079
lamentations. And what about when all
is said and done? What about all

2437
03:32:15.120 --> 03:32:18.360
because a girl has ceased to love
you? Do you place your highest hopes

2438
03:32:18.399 --> 03:32:24.200
of happiness in a girl? They're
creatures without brains or heart, superficial and

2439
03:32:24.319 --> 03:32:30.719
vain, whipped up to a froth
mere, windy nothingness. And you would

2440
03:32:30.760 --> 03:32:35.000
kill yourself for that heaven above,
man, it is impossible. I do

2441
03:32:35.079 --> 03:32:39.159
not know what it is to love
a woman. Hey, but you do

2442
03:32:39.159 --> 03:32:43.239
not know what trouble and misery?
Are you? Fancy that all the woes

2443
03:32:43.280 --> 03:32:46.840
on earth have come upon you?
And it is nothing, after all but

2444
03:32:46.920 --> 03:32:52.159
a little discomfort, a little wounded
conceit. Perhaps it will be no worse.

2445
03:32:52.399 --> 03:32:56.319
If I had made away with myself
at every turn of ill luck,

2446
03:32:56.680 --> 03:33:00.360
I should have been dead a thousand
times, but I pulled through. You.

2447
03:33:00.399 --> 03:33:03.639
See, how can you be such
a coward? Eva has shown you

2448
03:33:03.799 --> 03:33:07.200
very plainly that she does not want
to have anything more to say to you,

2449
03:33:07.479 --> 03:33:11.280
and you would see her once more. Suppose she were to show you

2450
03:33:11.319 --> 03:33:16.920
the door, What then if you
do such a thing, if you go

2451
03:33:16.079 --> 03:33:20.680
to her, you would be so
mean, in my eyes, so weak,

2452
03:33:20.200 --> 03:33:26.079
so cowardly, so childish, such
a fool, such a damned fool,

2453
03:33:26.479 --> 03:33:30.120
that you may go to the devil
for aught. Eye care. He

2454
03:33:30.200 --> 03:33:33.639
cleared his throat as if he were
actually sick, and turned away, with

2455
03:33:33.719 --> 03:33:39.360
a queer, light headed feeling in
his brain. Vestova said, nothing torn

2456
03:33:39.399 --> 03:33:45.159
in his mind between two impulses.
He was no longer clear as to his

2457
03:33:45.280 --> 03:33:48.639
purpose, quite bewildered by the false
voice in his ear, in his soul,

2458
03:33:50.760 --> 03:33:54.639
there was something factitious in Bertie's speech, a false ring which Frank could

2459
03:33:54.639 --> 03:33:58.239
not detect, though he was conscious
of it. And the voice of his

2460
03:33:58.319 --> 03:34:05.079
own desires rang false too, with
jarring, unresolved chords which jangled inharmoniously against

2461
03:34:05.159 --> 03:34:11.159
each other. He had completely lost
his head. But he sat silent for

2462
03:34:11.200 --> 03:34:16.319
some time, till at length he
repeated, with solemn obstinacy, all right,

2463
03:34:16.799 --> 03:34:18.440
I do not care a pin.
I shall go all the same.

2464
03:34:20.479 --> 03:34:26.040
But Bertie began again with honeyed smoothness, this time seating himself on the floor,

2465
03:34:26.360 --> 03:34:28.920
as was his wont when he was
out of luck on the fur rug

2466
03:34:30.000 --> 03:34:35.399
before the fire, resting his throbbing
head against a chair. Come, Frank,

2467
03:34:35.799 --> 03:34:39.319
get this out of your mind.
You never meant that you would really

2468
03:34:39.360 --> 03:34:43.159
go. You are at heart too
proud and too brave to think of it.

2469
03:34:43.280 --> 03:34:48.280
Seriously pulled yourself together? Have you
forgotten everything? Did not even tell

2470
03:34:48.319 --> 03:34:52.920
you that she did not believe your
word, that you were false to her,

2471
03:34:52.360 --> 03:34:56.639
that you were still friends with that
other girl, and that she knew

2472
03:34:56.639 --> 03:35:01.040
it. To tell you the truth, I observed from the fur how suspicious

2473
03:35:01.040 --> 03:35:03.799
she was, and I did not
think it to be coming in a young

2474
03:35:03.879 --> 03:35:09.319
lady. I did not think it's
quite quite nice to be sure that evening

2475
03:35:09.360 --> 03:35:13.079
at the lyceum it did look as
if there was something in it still when

2476
03:35:13.079 --> 03:35:16.719
you assured her that it was at
an end. It seems to me quite

2477
03:35:16.840 --> 03:35:22.280
monstrous that she did not believe you. Then you cannot possibly mean what you

2478
03:35:22.399 --> 03:35:26.239
say when you speak of seeing her
again. Of course it makes no difference

2479
03:35:26.239 --> 03:35:31.600
to me go by all means for
what I care, But I should regard

2480
03:35:31.639 --> 03:35:37.639
it as such folly, such utter
folly. And still Frank sat speechless,

2481
03:35:37.200 --> 03:35:43.760
lost with the bewildering jangle still in
his brain. And you will take the

2482
03:35:43.760 --> 03:35:46.239
same view of it if you only
think it over. Think it over,

2483
03:35:46.319 --> 03:35:54.719
Frank, I will, said Frank
gloomily. Bertie went on flattering his manly

2484
03:35:54.799 --> 03:35:58.639
courage, and it sounded like bells
in Frank's ears, pride, pluck,

2485
03:36:00.120 --> 03:36:05.120
pride, pluck, Only the bells
were cracked, and yet the jingle soothed

2486
03:36:05.200 --> 03:36:09.200
him. Did he, at this
moment's love Eva? Or was it all

2487
03:36:09.239 --> 03:36:13.239
over? Had she killed his love
by her doubts? Pride, pluck,

2488
03:36:13.680 --> 03:36:20.159
pride pluck? He could not tell, alas he could not tell. With

2489
03:36:20.239 --> 03:36:24.879
a movement like a caress, Bertie
crept nearer, laid his head on the

2490
03:36:24.000 --> 03:36:30.280
arm of Vestova's chair and clasped his
hands about his knees, looking in the

2491
03:36:30.360 --> 03:36:35.680
dusk and firelight like a supple panther, and his eyes gleamed like a panther's

2492
03:36:35.079 --> 03:36:41.440
black and flame colored speak. Frank, I cannot bear to see you like

2493
03:36:41.479 --> 03:36:45.319
this. I care for you so
much, though perhaps it does not seem

2494
03:36:45.360 --> 03:36:48.440
so to you just now, and
though I have my own way of showing

2495
03:36:48.479 --> 03:36:52.120
it. Oh, I know very
well that you sometimes think me ungrateful,

2496
03:36:52.440 --> 03:36:56.200
But you do not know me.
I am really devoted to you. I

2497
03:36:56.280 --> 03:37:01.879
never loved my father, nor any
woman, nor even myself as I do

2498
03:37:01.959 --> 03:37:05.760
you. I could do anything in
the world for you, and that is

2499
03:37:05.799 --> 03:37:09.520
a great deal for me to say. I say, Frank, I will

2500
03:37:09.520 --> 03:37:13.200
not have you. Look, so
let us leave London. Let us travel,

2501
03:37:13.479 --> 03:37:18.399
or go to live somewhere else in
Paris or Vienna. Yes, let

2502
03:37:18.520 --> 03:37:22.120
us go to Vienna. That is
a long way off. Or to America,

2503
03:37:22.319 --> 03:37:26.280
to San Francisco, or to Australia. Wherever you choose. The world

2504
03:37:26.360 --> 03:37:31.680
is wide and you may see so
many things that you will get fresh ideas.

2505
03:37:31.600 --> 03:37:35.559
Or let us make an expedition to
the interior of Africa. I should

2506
03:37:35.719 --> 03:37:39.879
enjoy seeing such a savage country.
And I'm stronger than I look, I'm

2507
03:37:39.959 --> 03:37:45.959
tough. Let us wander about a
great deal and go through a great deal

2508
03:37:46.280 --> 03:37:50.239
great bodily fatigue. Don't you think
it must be splendid to cut your way

2509
03:37:50.280 --> 03:37:56.239
through the impenetrable bush. Oh?
Yes, let us bathe our souls in

2510
03:37:56.399 --> 03:38:01.920
nature, in fresh air and space
and health very well, Frank grumbled.

2511
03:38:03.159 --> 03:38:07.319
We will go away, we will
travel, but I cannot do it comfortably.

2512
03:38:07.600 --> 03:38:11.680
I have very little money. I
spent so much last year. Oh,

2513
03:38:11.879 --> 03:38:15.959
but we will be economical. What
need have we of luxury? Ay,

2514
03:38:16.360 --> 03:38:20.680
at any rate, can do without
it very well, Frank muttered again,

2515
03:38:20.040 --> 03:38:26.360
we will do it cheaply. Then
they were silent for a time in

2516
03:38:26.399 --> 03:38:31.840
the twilight. Frank, by some
slight movement, touched one of Bertie's hands.

2517
03:38:31.280 --> 03:38:37.120
He suddenly grasped it, squeezed it
almost to crushing, and said,

2518
03:38:37.319 --> 03:38:46.840
in a low voice, good old
fellow, dear good fellow. Seventeen can

2519
03:38:46.920 --> 03:38:50.319
you have gone there? Thought of
Anna Mahren, as he sat at home

2520
03:38:50.360 --> 03:38:54.840
alone the next evening and did not
know with what purpose Vestova had gone out.

2521
03:38:56.040 --> 03:38:58.920
Well, he would sit up for
him. There was nothing else to

2522
03:38:58.959 --> 03:39:01.559
be done, just a few days
to arrange matters, and then they would

2523
03:39:01.600 --> 03:39:07.360
be off away from London. Oh
what a luckless wretch, he thought himself,

2524
03:39:07.040 --> 03:39:11.680
All this villainy for the sake of
mere material comfort, of idleness and

2525
03:39:11.760 --> 03:39:16.840
wealth, which, as he was
slowly beginning to discover, had all become

2526
03:39:16.879 --> 03:39:22.120
a matter of indifference to him.
Oh for the bohemian liberty of his vagabond

2527
03:39:22.200 --> 03:39:26.280
life in the States, free,
unshackled. His pockets, now full of

2528
03:39:26.360 --> 03:39:33.799
dollars, had again empty, absolutely
empty. He felt quite homesick for it.

2529
03:39:33.799 --> 03:39:39.520
It struck him as an enviable existence
of careless independence, as compared with

2530
03:39:39.559 --> 03:39:45.360
his present state of vacuous ease and
servility. How greatly he was changed.

2531
03:39:46.239 --> 03:39:50.559
Formerly he had been unfettered, indeed
by conventional rules, but free from any

2532
03:39:50.600 --> 03:39:56.440
great duplicity. And now his mind
had been cultivated, but was sunk in

2533
03:39:56.479 --> 03:40:01.200
a depth of baseness, and whats
for to enable him to hold fast that

2534
03:40:01.440 --> 03:40:05.639
which no longer had any value in
his eyes? No value? Why then,

2535
03:40:05.719 --> 03:40:09.559
did he not cut his way out
of his own net, to go

2536
03:40:09.639 --> 03:40:13.840
away in poverty and write a single
word to Frank and Eva, to bring

2537
03:40:13.879 --> 03:40:18.879
them together again. It was still
in his power to do this, He

2538
03:40:18.000 --> 03:40:22.479
thought of it, but smiled at
the thought. It was impossible, And

2539
03:40:22.559 --> 03:40:28.440
yet he could not see wherein the
impossibility lay. But it was impossible.

2540
03:40:28.799 --> 03:40:31.360
It was a thing which could not
be done. It was illogical, full

2541
03:40:31.399 --> 03:40:37.200
of dark difficulties, a thing that
could never come about for mysterious reasons of

2542
03:40:37.239 --> 03:40:43.120
fatality, which indeed he did not
clearly discern, but accepted as unanswerable.

2543
03:40:43.239 --> 03:40:48.959
He was musing in this vein alone
that evening, when Annie, the housekeeper

2544
03:40:48.120 --> 03:40:52.120
came to tell him that someone wanted
to speak with him. Who is it?

2545
03:40:52.920 --> 03:40:56.200
She did not know, so he
went into the sitting room, where

2546
03:40:56.239 --> 03:41:01.399
he found Sir Archibald's footman, with
his big nose and ugly, shifty gray

2547
03:41:01.479 --> 03:41:07.959
eyes like a bird's twinkling in his
terra cotta face, which was varied by

2548
03:41:07.000 --> 03:41:11.680
blue tracts of shorn, whisker and
beard. He was out of his livery

2549
03:41:11.959 --> 03:41:16.040
and dressed like a gentleman, in
a light overcoat and a felt hat with

2550
03:41:16.120 --> 03:41:22.239
a cane and gloves. What brings
you here? Said Van Mehren shortly,

2551
03:41:22.280 --> 03:41:24.520
with a scowl. I have always
told you that I would not have you

2552
03:41:24.600 --> 03:41:28.440
come to the house. You have
no complaint to make of me, I

2553
03:41:28.479 --> 03:41:33.360
suppose. Oh no, he had
no complaint to make. He had only

2554
03:41:33.399 --> 03:41:37.239
come to call on an old friend
such as swell Bertie would remember the times

2555
03:41:37.239 --> 03:41:41.000
they had had in New York.
They had been waiters together, pals at

2556
03:41:41.000 --> 03:41:46.120
the same hotel. Rumchan say that
they should run up against each other.

2557
03:41:46.159 --> 03:41:50.159
In London. It was a small
world. You were always running up against

2558
03:41:50.159 --> 03:41:54.920
someone wherever you might go. You
couldn't keep out of anyone's way. In

2559
03:41:54.000 --> 03:41:58.680
fact, if it was God's will, you should meet a fella you couldn't

2560
03:41:58.719 --> 03:42:01.319
keep out of that fella's way,
and then you might sometimes be able to

2561
03:42:01.360 --> 03:42:05.120
do him a good turn. There
had been some letters written, and he

2562
03:42:05.239 --> 03:42:11.959
scraped his throat inconvenient letters. Sixty
quid down for two letters to the young

2563
03:42:11.000 --> 03:42:16.479
woman. That was the bargain.
Life was hard to get a little fun

2564
03:42:16.559 --> 03:42:20.399
now and then in London cost a
deal o money. And now there was

2565
03:42:20.440 --> 03:42:24.799
a third letter in the same hand, dear, dear, who's could it

2566
03:42:24.879 --> 03:42:28.639
be? Now? Addressed to the
old man. He didn't want to be

2567
03:42:28.719 --> 03:42:31.239
too hard on an old pal,
but he had come just to ask him

2568
03:42:31.479 --> 03:42:35.639
whether that letter, too, was
of any value. He had it with

2569
03:42:35.719 --> 03:42:39.879
him, Then give it here,
stammered Van Meron, as pale as death,

2570
03:42:41.120 --> 03:42:45.719
holding out his hand. Aye,
but thirty sovs was too little,

2571
03:42:46.079 --> 03:42:50.079
a mere song. This letter was
to the old man who was worth more.

2572
03:42:50.719 --> 03:42:54.360
And to tell the truth, his
old friend was hard up, desperately

2573
03:42:54.399 --> 03:42:58.559
hard up. Bertie was a gentleman
who could throw the money about, and

2574
03:42:58.600 --> 03:43:01.280
he had a noble heart. He
would never leave an old pal in the

2575
03:43:01.399 --> 03:43:05.280
lurch, the devils in it.
We must help each other in this world.

2576
03:43:05.719 --> 03:43:11.920
Say a hundred you are a rascal, cried Bertie. We had agreed

2577
03:43:11.959 --> 03:43:16.200
on thirty pounds. I have not
a hundred pounds. I am not rich.

2578
03:43:16.079 --> 03:43:20.840
Well, of course he knew that. But mister Vestovna, no doubt

2579
03:43:20.000 --> 03:43:24.319
gave his friend sixpence now and then. And mister Vesthova was made of money.

2580
03:43:24.959 --> 03:43:28.280
Come, come, mister van Meyer, and must think it over.

2581
03:43:28.680 --> 03:43:33.680
He really should do something for an
old pal, and a hundred pounds was

2582
03:43:33.719 --> 03:43:37.799
not the whole world. After all, I have not a hundred pounds at

2583
03:43:37.799 --> 03:43:41.399
this moment, I assure you,
said Bertie, huskily, from a parched

2584
03:43:41.440 --> 03:43:46.559
throat and shaking as if in an
eager fit. Well, he would come

2585
03:43:46.559 --> 03:43:50.360
again, then, by and by
he would take great care of the letter.

2586
03:43:52.479 --> 03:43:54.479
Hand over the letter. I will
give you the money another time.

2587
03:43:56.200 --> 03:44:01.680
But his old pal laughed cheerfully.
No, no given is given. They

2588
03:44:01.799 --> 03:44:05.600
might trust each other, but it
should be given. Take the letter for

2589
03:44:05.639 --> 03:44:09.440
the hundred pounds down. But I
will not have you coming here again.

2590
03:44:09.760 --> 03:44:13.600
I will not have it. I
tell you all right. There was no

2591
03:44:13.680 --> 03:44:18.600
difficulty on that score. His swell
friend might bring it himself to morrow,

2592
03:44:18.719 --> 03:44:22.440
Yes, to morrow without fail.
And now go, for God's sake,

2593
03:44:22.600 --> 03:44:28.799
go. He pushed his demon out
of the house. Promising him to morrow

2594
03:44:28.040 --> 03:44:33.319
to morrow evening. Then he called
up Annie and vehemently asked her whether she

2595
03:44:33.399 --> 03:44:39.760
knew the man who was the fellow
he roughly inquired, like a gambler who

2596
03:44:39.840 --> 03:44:43.840
plays a high tramp at a critical
point of the game. She however,

2597
03:44:43.879 --> 03:44:48.559
did not know, and was surprised
that mister van Marin should not have known

2598
03:44:48.639 --> 03:44:52.959
him. Had he been troublesome.
Yes, a beggar, a regular beggar.

2599
03:44:54.680 --> 03:44:58.840
He was dressed like a gentleman too. Be more careful for the future,

2600
03:44:58.079 --> 03:45:05.719
said Bertie, and let no one
into the house. Eighteen. He

2601
03:45:05.840 --> 03:45:11.520
sat up that evening till Frank came
home. As he sat alone, he

2602
03:45:11.600 --> 03:45:18.239
wept for hours. He sobbed passionately, miserably, till in the slightly built

2603
03:45:18.319 --> 03:45:22.079
little villa Annie and her husband might
have heard him, till his head felt

2604
03:45:22.120 --> 03:45:28.799
like a drum and bursting with throbbing
pain. He fairly cried in irrepressible wretchedness,

2605
03:45:30.120 --> 03:45:35.239
and his sobs shook his little body
like a rhythm of agony. Oh,

2606
03:45:35.319 --> 03:45:39.799
how could he get out of this
slough? Kill himself? How could

2607
03:45:39.840 --> 03:45:43.559
he live on in such wretchedness?
And again and again he looked about him

2608
03:45:43.600 --> 03:45:48.399
for a weapon, his hands clutched
his throat like a vice. But he

2609
03:45:48.479 --> 03:45:52.639
had not the courage, at least
not at that moment. For as he

2610
03:45:52.719 --> 03:45:58.280
clenched his fingers, and an endurable
pain mounted to his already aching head that

2611
03:45:58.399 --> 03:46:05.120
he wept all the more bitterly at
finding himself too weak to do it.

2612
03:46:05.120 --> 03:46:09.680
It was one in the morning.
Frank must surely come in soon. He

2613
03:46:09.760 --> 03:46:13.680
looked in the glass and saw a
pale, purple gray face, with swollen,

2614
03:46:13.719 --> 03:46:18.760
wet eyes, and thick blue veins
on the temples, pulsating visibly under

2615
03:46:18.799 --> 03:46:24.520
the transparent skin. Frank must not
see him thus, and yet he must

2616
03:46:24.559 --> 03:46:30.200
know that he must ask. He
went up to his room undressed and got

2617
03:46:30.239 --> 03:46:33.879
shivering into bed, but he did
not go to sleep. He lay listening

2618
03:46:33.920 --> 03:46:39.760
for the front door to open.
At half past two, Vesthova came in.

2619
03:46:39.920 --> 03:46:43.159
Good God, if he had gone
to the roads. No, no,

2620
03:46:43.600 --> 03:46:48.719
he must have been at the club. He went straight upstairs to bed.

2621
03:46:48.440 --> 03:46:52.239
Annie and her husband locked up the
house. There was a noise of

2622
03:46:52.319 --> 03:46:58.200
bolts and locks, the clank of
metal bars. Half an hour later,

2623
03:46:58.520 --> 03:47:03.280
Bertie rose. Now it would be
dark in Frank's room, Otherwise he would

2624
03:47:03.280 --> 03:47:11.719
have seen that purple pallor out into
the passage. Tap Frank Hallo come in

2625
03:47:11.719 --> 03:47:16.479
in he went. Vesthova was in
bed. No light but the night light

2626
03:47:16.319 --> 03:47:22.159
Bertie with his back to the glimmer. Now would Frank mention the roads?

2627
03:47:22.799 --> 03:47:28.040
No? He asked what was up
and found Mahring began. There was an

2628
03:47:28.159 --> 03:47:31.639
urgent matter he must lay before his
friend, some old debts he had remembered,

2629
03:47:31.879 --> 03:47:35.840
which he must pay before they went
away. He was so vexed about

2630
03:47:35.879 --> 03:47:41.680
it, it was really taking advantage
of Frank's kindness. Could Frank give him

2631
03:47:41.719 --> 03:47:46.200
the money? My dear fellow,
I have run completely dry. I have

2632
03:47:46.319 --> 03:47:50.120
only just enough to pay for our
passage to buen as Aires. How much

2633
03:47:50.159 --> 03:47:54.760
do you want? A hundred pounds? A hundred pounds, I assure you.

2634
03:47:56.079 --> 03:47:58.920
I do not know where to lay
my hand on the money. Do

2635
03:47:58.959 --> 03:48:01.000
you want it now on the spot? Can you not put it off?

2636
03:48:01.440 --> 03:48:05.559
Or can you not do with a
bill? No? I must have money

2637
03:48:05.600 --> 03:48:11.719
down, hard cash. Well,
wait a bit, Perhaps I can find

2638
03:48:11.719 --> 03:48:15.200
a way. Yes, I will
manage it somehow. I will see about

2639
03:48:15.200 --> 03:48:18.760
it tomorrow tomorrow morning. Are you
in such a juice of a hurry?

2640
03:48:20.239 --> 03:48:24.440
Well, all right, I will
find it somehow. But now go to

2641
03:48:24.479 --> 03:48:28.280
bed, for I'm sleepy. We
made a night of it. Tomorrow I

2642
03:48:28.280 --> 03:48:31.959
am sure I can help you,
and at any rate I will not leave

2643
03:48:31.000 --> 03:48:35.079
you in a fix that you may
rely on. But you are a troublesome

2644
03:48:35.120 --> 03:48:39.719
boy. Do you hear? Only
the other day you had thirty pounds,

2645
03:48:39.959 --> 03:48:45.600
and then again thirty more. For
a minute Van Mayern stood rigid, a

2646
03:48:45.680 --> 03:48:50.399
dark mass against the dim gleam of
the night light. Then he went up

2647
03:48:50.440 --> 03:48:52.920
to the bed, and, falling
on his knees, lay his head on

2648
03:48:54.000 --> 03:48:58.399
the coverlet, and fairly sobbed.
I say, are you ill? Are

2649
03:48:58.399 --> 03:49:03.319
you going? Cre asked Vestova?
What on earth ails you? No?

2650
03:49:03.559 --> 03:49:09.040
He was not crazy, but only
so grieved to take advantage of Frank's good

2651
03:49:09.120 --> 03:49:13.680
nature, especially if his friend was
himself in difficulties. They were such shameful

2652
03:49:13.719 --> 03:49:18.799
debts he would rather not tell him
what for debts outstanding from a time when

2653
03:49:18.879 --> 03:49:24.799
for a few days he had disappeared. Frank knew, didn't he old sins

2654
03:49:24.840 --> 03:49:28.280
to pay for a well behave better
for the future. We will set it

2655
03:49:28.319 --> 03:49:33.360
all right tomorrow. Make no more
noise and go to bed. I'm dead

2656
03:49:33.479 --> 03:49:37.440
sleepy. We all had as much
as we could carry come get up,

2657
03:49:37.520 --> 03:49:43.280
I say. Van Maheron rose,
and taking Vestov's hand, tried to thank

2658
03:49:43.399 --> 03:49:48.200
him. There that will do.
Go to bed, I say, And

2659
03:49:48.280 --> 03:49:54.120
he went in his own room.
He presently through the wall heard Frank snoring.

2660
03:49:54.360 --> 03:49:58.920
He remained sitting on the edge of
his bed. Once more his fingers

2661
03:50:00.120 --> 03:50:05.799
gripped his throat tighter, tighter,
But it's hurt him, made his headache.

2662
03:50:07.040 --> 03:50:11.239
Great, God, he thought,
is it possible that I should be

2663
03:50:11.440 --> 03:50:24.760
the thing I am? End of
section six Section seven of Footsteps of Fate

2664
03:50:24.280 --> 03:50:33.319
by Luis Kuperus. This LibriVox recording
is in the public domain. Part four

2665
03:50:33.840 --> 03:50:41.040
one to four one A life of
wandering for two years and more of voyages

2666
03:50:41.159 --> 03:50:46.559
from America to Australia, from Australia
back to Europe, painfully restless, finding

2667
03:50:46.600 --> 03:50:52.440
no new aims in life, no
new reason for their own existence, no

2668
03:50:52.559 --> 03:50:56.600
new thing in the countries they traversed, or in the various atmospheres they breathed.

2669
03:50:58.719 --> 03:51:01.959
A life at first with that the
struggle for existence, dragged out by

2670
03:51:03.000 --> 03:51:05.920
each under the weight of his own
woe, with many regrets, but no

2671
03:51:07.040 --> 03:51:13.239
anxiety as to the material burden of
existence. But presently there was that growing

2672
03:51:13.319 --> 03:51:18.399
dread of that material burden, the
unpleasant consciousness that there was no more money

2673
03:51:18.440 --> 03:51:24.000
coming out from home month after month, disagreeable transactions with bankers in distant places,

2674
03:51:24.479 --> 03:51:30.680
constant letter writing to and fro.
In short, the almost total evaporation

2675
03:51:30.799 --> 03:51:35.879
of a fortune of which too much
had long since been dissipated in golden vapor.

2676
03:51:35.840 --> 03:51:39.559
Then they saw the necessity of looking
about them for means of subsistence,

2677
03:51:41.079 --> 03:51:46.159
and they had taken work in factories, assurance offices, brokers' warehouses and what

2678
03:51:46.280 --> 03:51:50.239
not, simply to keep their heads
above water. In this life which they

2679
03:51:50.280 --> 03:51:54.959
found so aimless and wretched. They
had known hours of bitter anguish and many

2680
03:51:56.040 --> 03:52:01.239
long days of poverty with no escape, and the remembrance of White Rose Cottage.

2681
03:52:01.399 --> 03:52:07.000
Still they had felt no longing for
White Rose Cottage, again, gradually

2682
03:52:07.079 --> 03:52:13.079
yielding to indifference and solemn patience,
their fears for the future and struggles to

2683
03:52:13.120 --> 03:52:18.840
live with the outcome of natural inherited
instinct rather than of spontaneous impulse and personal

2684
03:52:18.879 --> 03:52:26.360
desire. And even in this gloomy
indifference, Van Mehern had one comforting reflection,

2685
03:52:26.840 --> 03:52:31.799
one delicate pleasure, exquisite and peculiar, as a solace to his self

2686
03:52:31.840 --> 03:52:37.239
contempt, the consolation of knowing that, now that Vestova had known some buffeting

2687
03:52:37.319 --> 03:52:41.959
of fortune, now that they had
to work for their bread, he had

2688
03:52:41.000 --> 03:52:46.239
never felt impelled to leave his friend
to his fate or desert him as soon

2689
03:52:46.280 --> 03:52:50.799
as the game was up. The
impulse to abandon Frank had never risen in

2690
03:52:50.840 --> 03:52:54.879
his soul, and he was glad
of it, glad that when it occurred

2691
03:52:54.879 --> 03:52:58.079
to him afterwards as a possibility,
it was merely as a notion with which

2692
03:52:58.120 --> 03:53:03.399
he had no concern and which was
no part of himself. No, he

2693
03:53:03.479 --> 03:53:07.600
had stuck by Frank, partly,
perhaps as a result of his cat like

2694
03:53:07.760 --> 03:53:13.280
nature, and because he clung to
his place at Frank's side, but not

2695
03:53:13.520 --> 03:53:18.959
for that alone. There was something
ideal in it, some little sentiments.

2696
03:53:18.639 --> 03:53:22.520
He liked, the notion of remaining
faithful to a man who had not assent

2697
03:53:22.680 --> 03:53:28.479
left in the world. They had
worked together, sharing the toil and the

2698
03:53:28.520 --> 03:53:33.879
pay with brotherly equality, two long
years, and now they were back in

2699
03:53:33.959 --> 03:53:39.799
Europe, avoiding England and returning to
their native land, Holland, Amsterdam and

2700
03:53:39.840 --> 03:53:45.360
the Hague. A strange longing had
grown up in them both to see once

2701
03:53:45.440 --> 03:53:48.959
more the places they had quitted so
long before, bored by their familiarity,

2702
03:53:50.280 --> 03:53:54.879
to see the wider world, to
drag home their broken lives, as though

2703
03:53:54.920 --> 03:53:58.239
they hoped there to find a cure, a miraculous bomb to console them for

2704
03:53:58.360 --> 03:54:05.159
existence. They had scraped together some
little savings and might take a few months

2705
03:54:05.200 --> 03:54:09.840
of summer holiday by thriftily spending their
handful of cash. So they had taken

2706
03:54:09.920 --> 03:54:13.959
lodgings in a villa at Scathing,
a little house to the left of the

2707
03:54:15.000 --> 03:54:18.200
Orange Hotel, looking out over the
sea, and the sea had become a

2708
03:54:18.280 --> 03:54:24.639
changeful background for their lazy summer fancies, for they did not care to wander

2709
03:54:24.680 --> 03:54:28.559
away. Amid the bustle of the
court house and the sands. Frank would

2710
03:54:28.600 --> 03:54:33.399
sit for hours on the balcony in
a cane chair, his legs on the

2711
03:54:33.479 --> 03:54:37.799
railing, the blue smoke of his
cigars curling up in front of his nose,

2712
03:54:37.600 --> 03:54:43.440
and then he felt soothed, free
from all acute pain, resigned to

2713
03:54:43.520 --> 03:54:46.479
his own uselessness, though with a
memory now and again of the past,

2714
03:54:46.799 --> 03:54:52.639
and of a sorrow which was no
longer too keen and then stiff. With

2715
03:54:52.760 --> 03:54:56.840
sitting still, he would play a
game of quoits or hockey offence a little

2716
03:54:56.879 --> 03:55:01.520
with Bertie, whom he had taught
to use the foils. He looked,

2717
03:55:01.559 --> 03:55:05.239
full of health, was stouter than
of yore, with a fine, high

2718
03:55:05.280 --> 03:55:09.239
color under his clear tanned skin,
a mild gravity in his bright gray eyes,

2719
03:55:09.600 --> 03:55:16.360
and sometimes a rather bitter curl under
his sheeny yellow mustache. But Bertie

2720
03:55:16.399 --> 03:55:20.159
suffered more. And as he looked
out over the semicircle of ocean and saw

2721
03:55:20.200 --> 03:55:24.440
the waters break with their endless rollers
of blue and green, and gray and

2722
03:55:24.600 --> 03:55:31.440
violet and pearly iridescence, the vaulted
sky above, full of endless cloud scenery,

2723
03:55:33.000 --> 03:55:37.639
sweeping or creeping masses of opaque gray
or white, silvery pinions, dappled

2724
03:55:37.680 --> 03:55:43.920
feathers, drifts of down like sky
foam. He fancied that his fate was

2725
03:55:43.959 --> 03:55:50.079
coming up over the sea. It
was coming closer, irresistibly closer, and

2726
03:55:50.200 --> 03:55:54.760
he watched its approach. He felt
it so intensely that sometimes his whole being

2727
03:55:54.920 --> 03:56:00.799
seemed to be on the alert while
he sat motionless in his cane chair with

2728
03:56:00.920 --> 03:56:09.239
his eyes fixed on the barren waste
of waters. Two. Thus it happened

2729
03:56:09.239 --> 03:56:13.319
that, sitting here one day,
he saw on the shore below, between

2730
03:56:13.360 --> 03:56:16.920
the tufts of yellow broom growing on
the sand hills. Two figures coming towards

2731
03:56:18.000 --> 03:56:22.399
him, a man and a woman, like finely drawn silhouettes in Indian ink

2732
03:56:22.479 --> 03:56:26.879
against the silver sea. A pang
suddenly shot through his frame, from his

2733
03:56:28.000 --> 03:56:33.280
heart to his throat, to his
temples. But the saltreak came up to

2734
03:56:33.360 --> 03:56:37.120
him and roused his senses with a
freshness that mounted to his brain, so

2735
03:56:37.239 --> 03:56:41.680
that in spite of the shock,
it remained quite clear, as if filled

2736
03:56:41.719 --> 03:56:48.959
with a rare atmosphere. He saw
everything distinctly, down to the subtlest detail

2737
03:56:48.000 --> 03:56:52.719
of hue and line, The silver
gray curve of the horizon like an enormous,

2738
03:56:52.799 --> 03:56:58.559
glittering liquid eye with mother of pearl
tints, broken by the tumbling crests

2739
03:56:58.559 --> 03:57:03.280
of the way leaves, and hardly
darker than the spread of sky, strewn

2740
03:57:03.360 --> 03:57:09.159
with a variously gray fleece of rent
and raveled clouds. To the right,

2741
03:57:09.600 --> 03:57:15.920
one stucco facade of the courthouse,
looking with stupid dignity at the sea out

2742
03:57:15.959 --> 03:57:20.479
of its staring window. Eyes further
away by the water's edge, the fishing

2743
03:57:20.520 --> 03:57:28.319
boats like large walnut shells with filmy
veils of black netting hanging from the masts.

2744
03:57:28.360 --> 03:57:31.879
Each boat with its little flag playfully
waving and curling in the breeze.

2745
03:57:33.360 --> 03:57:37.360
And on the terrace, on the
strand, among a confused crowd of yellow

2746
03:57:37.399 --> 03:57:41.280
painted chairs, a throng of summer
visitors, like a great stain of pale

2747
03:57:41.319 --> 03:57:48.680
water color in gay but delicate tints, he could see quite clearly. Hear

2748
03:57:48.799 --> 03:57:52.959
a rent in the red sail of
a boat. There a ribbon fluttering from

2749
03:57:52.000 --> 03:57:56.520
a basket chair. And again a
seagull on the shore, swooping to snatch

2750
03:57:56.600 --> 03:58:03.079
something out of the surf. He
noted all these little details, minute and

2751
03:58:03.159 --> 03:58:07.600
motley trifles, bright specks in the
expanse of sky and ocean, and very

2752
03:58:07.680 --> 03:58:13.799
visible in the subdued light of a
sunless day. And those two silhouettes,

2753
03:58:13.079 --> 03:58:18.520
a man and a woman, grew
larger, came nearer along the sands,

2754
03:58:18.680 --> 03:58:22.680
till they were just opposite to him. He knew them at once by their

2755
03:58:22.719 --> 03:58:28.840
general appearance, the man by a
peculiar gesture of raising his hat and wiping

2756
03:58:28.879 --> 03:58:33.120
his forehead, the lady by the
way she carried her parasol, the stick

2757
03:58:33.239 --> 03:58:37.520
resting on her shoulder while she held
the point of one of the ribs.

2758
03:58:37.079 --> 03:58:43.079
And recognizing them, he had a
singular light headed sensation, as though he

2759
03:58:43.120 --> 03:58:46.799
would presently be floating dizzily out of
his chair as swept away over the sea.

2760
03:58:48.840 --> 03:58:54.319
He fell back, feeling strangely weary, and dazzling sparks danced before his

2761
03:58:54.479 --> 03:59:00.920
fixed gaze like glittering notes of interrogation. What was to be done? Could

2762
03:59:00.920 --> 03:59:05.879
he devise some ingenious excuse and try
to tempt Frank to leave the place to

2763
03:59:05.000 --> 03:59:09.159
fly? Oh? How small the
world was? Was it? For this?

2764
03:59:09.440 --> 03:59:13.799
They had wandered over the globe,
never knowing any rest, to meet

2765
03:59:13.840 --> 03:59:20.000
at their very first halting place,
the two beings he most dreaded? Was

2766
03:59:20.079 --> 03:59:26.319
this accident or fatality? Yes?
Fatality? But then was he really afraid?

2767
03:59:26.959 --> 03:59:31.159
And in his dejection he felt quite
sure that he was afraid of nothing,

2768
03:59:31.600 --> 03:59:35.760
That he was profoundly indifferent, full
of an intolerable weariness of self torture.

2769
03:59:37.799 --> 03:59:41.200
He was too tired to feel alarm. He would wait and see what

2770
03:59:41.319 --> 03:59:46.120
would happen. It must come.
There was no escape. It was fatality.

2771
03:59:48.200 --> 03:59:52.639
It was rest to sit there,
motionless, inert, willless, with

2772
03:59:52.760 --> 03:59:56.559
the wide silver gray waters before him, waiting for what might happen, To

2773
03:59:56.639 --> 04:00:01.559
struggle no more for his own ends, to fear, no more, but

2774
04:00:01.600 --> 04:00:05.879
to wait patiently and forever. It
must come, like the tide from the

2775
04:00:05.959 --> 04:00:11.079
ocean. It must cover him as
the surf covers the sands, and then

2776
04:00:11.239 --> 04:00:16.479
go down again, and perhaps drag
him with it, drowned and dead.

2777
04:00:16.639 --> 04:00:20.399
A wave of that flood would wash
over him and stop his breath, and

2778
04:00:20.559 --> 04:00:26.559
more waves would follow, endlessly,
a senseless tide, a fruitless eternity.

2779
04:00:28.760 --> 04:00:31.920
I wish I did not feel it
so acutely, he painfully thought. It

2780
04:00:33.000 --> 04:00:35.479
is too silly to feel it.
So perhaps nothing will come of it,

2781
04:00:35.559 --> 04:00:39.639
and I shall live to be a
hundred in peace and contentment. Still,

2782
04:00:41.120 --> 04:00:43.920
this is undeniable. This is a
fact. They are there. They are

2783
04:00:43.959 --> 04:00:48.159
here. But if it were really
coming, I should not feel it.

2784
04:00:48.799 --> 04:00:54.639
Nothing happens but the unexpected. It
is mere nervous weakness over tension. Nothing

2785
04:00:54.639 --> 04:00:58.959
can really matter to me, Nothing
matters. The air is lovely and pleasant,

2786
04:01:00.319 --> 04:01:05.319
soft. There floats a cloud,
and I will just sit still without

2787
04:01:05.440 --> 04:01:09.239
fear, quite at my ease.
There they are again, the sea,

2788
04:01:09.360 --> 04:01:15.639
muse fly low. I will wait. Wait. Those boys are playing in

2789
04:01:15.680 --> 04:01:20.200
that boat. What's folly? They
will have it over? He looked with

2790
04:01:20.280 --> 04:01:24.840
involuntary interest at their antics, and
then again at the gentleman and lady.

2791
04:01:24.840 --> 04:01:28.600
They were now full in sight,
just below him, and they went past,

2792
04:01:30.079 --> 04:01:35.159
knowing nothing, without a gesture,
like two puppets. Ah, but

2793
04:01:35.319 --> 04:01:39.040
I know, thought he. They
are here, and it has come in

2794
04:01:39.120 --> 04:01:43.159
their train perps. But it may
go away with them too and be no

2795
04:01:43.239 --> 04:01:46.600
more than a threat. So I
shall wait. I do not care.

2796
04:01:46.000 --> 04:01:50.000
If it must come, it must. They had gone out of sight.

2797
04:01:50.479 --> 04:01:54.680
The boys and their boats were gone
too. The shore in front of him

2798
04:01:54.719 --> 04:02:01.120
was lonely, a long stretch of
desert. Suddenly he was seized with a

2799
04:02:01.200 --> 04:02:07.639
violent, shivering an agu He stood
up, his face quite colorless, his

2800
04:02:07.719 --> 04:02:13.520
knees quaking. Terror had suddenly been
too much for him, and large beads

2801
04:02:13.520 --> 04:02:18.959
of sweat bedewed his forehead. God
above, thought he life is terrible.

2802
04:02:20.479 --> 04:02:24.879
I have made it terrible. I'm
afraid. What can I do? Run

2803
04:02:24.920 --> 04:02:28.200
away? No? No, I
must wait. Can any harm come to

2804
04:02:28.280 --> 04:02:33.079
me? No? None, none, none. There they were, both

2805
04:02:33.079 --> 04:02:37.000
of them, she and her father. I am really afraid. Oh,

2806
04:02:37.280 --> 04:02:41.200
if it must come, great,
God, only let it come quickly.

2807
04:02:43.399 --> 04:02:46.440
Then he fancied his eyes had deceived
him, that it had not been those

2808
04:02:46.479 --> 04:02:52.040
two impossible. And yet he knew
that they were there. Terror throbbed in

2809
04:02:52.120 --> 04:02:56.879
his breast with vehement hearts beating,
and he now only marveled that he could

2810
04:02:56.879 --> 04:03:01.680
have looked at the boats with the
boys at all whilst Archiebald and Eva were

2811
04:03:01.719 --> 04:03:07.159
walking down on the shore. But
it's not to be upset. That was

2812
04:03:07.200 --> 04:03:16.319
what he had been thinking of the
boat. Three A whole fortnight of broiling

2813
04:03:16.440 --> 04:03:20.440
summer days slipped by. Had he
waited, always too weary to make the

2814
04:03:20.520 --> 04:03:26.879
smallest effort to induce Frank to quit
the place, it might perhaps have cost

2815
04:03:26.959 --> 04:03:30.520
him no more than a single word. But he never spoke the word,

2816
04:03:30.959 --> 04:03:35.079
waiting and gradually falling under a spell
of waiting, as though he were looking

2817
04:03:35.120 --> 04:03:41.040
for the mysterious outcome of an interesting
denouement. Had they already met, anywhere?

2818
04:03:41.520 --> 04:03:45.600
Would they meet? And if they
should, would anything come of it?

2819
04:03:46.879 --> 04:03:50.440
One thing inevitably follows another thought.
He nothing could ever be done to

2820
04:03:50.559 --> 04:03:56.079
check their course. Vestova was in
the habit of remaining a great deal indoors,

2821
04:03:56.680 --> 04:04:03.120
leading a quiet life between his gloomy
thoughts and his favorite gymnastics, not

2822
04:04:03.239 --> 04:04:07.680
troubling himself about the summer crowd outside
on the terrace and the shore. Thus

2823
04:04:07.719 --> 04:04:13.440
the fortnight passed without his becoming aware
of the vicinity of the woman whom Van

2824
04:04:13.600 --> 04:04:20.040
Meherin dreaded. Not a suspicion of
premonition thrilled through Frank's mild melancholy. He

2825
04:04:20.120 --> 04:04:26.920
had gone on breathing the fresh sea
air without perceiving any fragrance in the atmosphere

2826
04:04:26.959 --> 04:04:31.920
that could suggest her presence. He
did not discern the prince of her little

2827
04:04:31.040 --> 04:04:35.360
chores on the level strand below the
villa, nor the tilt of her parasol

2828
04:04:35.440 --> 04:04:41.719
passing under his eyes as he sat
calmly smoking with his feet on the railings.

2829
04:04:41.840 --> 04:04:46.520
And they must often have gazed at
the self same packets steaming into the

2830
04:04:46.600 --> 04:04:50.239
narrow harbor, like a colored silhouette
cut out of a prince, with its

2831
04:04:50.319 --> 04:04:56.600
little sails and flag of smoke.
But their eyes were unconscious. How nearly

2832
04:04:56.639 --> 04:05:01.920
they must be crossing each other out
there over the sea. After these two

2833
04:05:01.079 --> 04:05:05.639
scorching weeks, there came a dull, gray, sunless day, with heavy

2834
04:05:05.760 --> 04:05:13.440
rains stored in the driving black clouds
like swollen water skins. Frank had gone

2835
04:05:13.440 --> 04:05:16.000
for a walk on the shore by
the edge of the wailing, fretting sea.

2836
04:05:18.200 --> 04:05:22.399
The basket chairs had been carried higher
up and were closely packed and almost

2837
04:05:22.440 --> 04:05:28.600
unoccupied. There was scarcely anyone out. A dismal, sighing wind swept the

2838
04:05:28.639 --> 04:05:33.479
waters. It was an autumn day
full of the desolation of departed summer joys.

2839
04:05:35.000 --> 04:05:39.360
And as he walked on his ears
filled with the morning breeze, he

2840
04:05:39.440 --> 04:05:45.520
saw her coming towards him, with
waving skirts and fluttering ribbons, and great

2841
04:05:45.600 --> 04:05:50.159
heaven, it was she. It
was as though a massive rock had been

2842
04:05:50.239 --> 04:05:54.959
suddenly cast at his breast with a
giant's throat, and he lay crushed and

2843
04:05:54.120 --> 04:06:01.040
breathless beneath a surge of mingled joy
and anguish, struggled through his pulses,

2844
04:06:01.600 --> 04:06:07.840
thrilled his nerves mounted to his brain. He involuntarily stood still and almost unconsciously

2845
04:06:07.920 --> 04:06:13.799
exclaimed in a tone inaudible, indeed
at any distance and drowned in the wind.

2846
04:06:13.360 --> 04:06:18.879
Eva, my god, Eva.
But the distance was lessening. Now

2847
04:06:18.920 --> 04:06:24.040
She was close to him, and
apparently quite calm, because she had already

2848
04:06:24.079 --> 04:06:28.399
seen him that very morning, though
he had not seen her because she had

2849
04:06:28.440 --> 04:06:31.639
gone through the first emotion, because
she had walked that way in the wind,

2850
04:06:33.079 --> 04:06:35.440
close by the villa into which she
had seen him. Vanish in the

2851
04:06:35.479 --> 04:06:41.879
hope of meeting him again. The
question flashed through his mind whether he should

2852
04:06:41.920 --> 04:06:46.520
greet her with a bow as a
stranger, doing it with affected indifference,

2853
04:06:46.079 --> 04:06:52.719
as though unmoved by this accidental meeting
and forgets full of the past. And

2854
04:06:52.840 --> 04:06:56.680
in spite of his tremulous excitement,
he could still be amazed at seeing her

2855
04:06:56.760 --> 04:07:03.680
cam straight towards him without a hesitation, as if to her goal. In

2856
04:07:03.760 --> 04:07:09.479
an instant she stood before him with
her pale, earnest face and dark eyes

2857
04:07:09.520 --> 04:07:15.440
beaming with vitality. He saw her
whole form and figure, absorbed them into

2858
04:07:15.520 --> 04:07:20.159
himself, as though his soul would
devour the vision. Frank, she said

2859
04:07:20.239 --> 04:07:26.639
softly. He made no reply,
shivering with emotion and scarcely able to see

2860
04:07:26.680 --> 04:07:33.959
through the mist of tears which dimmed
his eyes. She smiled sadly. Will

2861
04:07:33.959 --> 04:07:37.520
you not hear me, she said, in her low, silvery voice.

2862
04:07:37.639 --> 04:07:43.799
He bowed awkwardly, muttering something awkwardly, putting out his hand. She gently

2863
04:07:43.840 --> 04:07:50.520
grasped it and went on still in
that subdued tone like an echo. Don't

2864
04:07:50.559 --> 04:07:54.000
be vexed with me for addressing you. There is something I should like to

2865
04:07:54.000 --> 04:07:56.239
say to you. I'm glad to
have met you here in scathing, and

2866
04:07:56.360 --> 04:08:01.719
by mere chance, or perhaps not
by mere chance, there was some misunderstanding,

2867
04:08:01.799 --> 04:08:05.879
Frank, between you and me,
and unpleasant words were spoken on both

2868
04:08:05.920 --> 04:08:11.040
sides. We are parted, and
yet I should like to ask your forgiveness

2869
04:08:11.040 --> 04:08:16.680
for what I then said. Tears
choked her. She could scarcely control herself,

2870
04:08:18.040 --> 04:08:22.159
but she concealed her emotion and stood
calmly before him, brave as women

2871
04:08:22.239 --> 04:08:26.319
can be brave, and with that
sad smile, full of hopeless submission,

2872
04:08:26.879 --> 04:08:33.079
without affectation, candid and simple.
Do not take it amiss. Only let

2873
04:08:33.159 --> 04:08:37.000
me ask you whether you can forgive
me for having once offended you, and

2874
04:08:37.079 --> 04:08:43.319
will henceforth think of me more tenderly? Eva Eva, he stammered, You

2875
04:08:43.440 --> 04:08:48.799
ask me to forgive? It was
I? It was I who Nay,

2876
04:08:50.159 --> 04:08:54.159
She gently interrupted, you have forgotten
it was I? Do you forgive me?

2877
04:08:56.079 --> 04:08:58.920
And she held out her hand.
Frank wrung it with a sob that

2878
04:09:00.120 --> 04:09:05.520
choked in his throat. Thank you, I am glad, she went on.

2879
04:09:05.120 --> 04:09:09.600
I was in the wrong. Why
should I not confess it? I

2880
04:09:09.680 --> 04:09:13.360
own it? Frankly, Will you
not come and see Papa. We are

2881
04:09:13.360 --> 04:09:18.200
living in a hotel, GARNI have
you anything to do if not come now

2882
04:09:18.239 --> 04:09:22.200
with me, Papa will be very
pleased to see you. Certainly, of

2883
04:09:22.319 --> 04:09:28.360
course, he muttered, walking on
by her side. But I am not

2884
04:09:28.440 --> 04:09:31.840
taking you from any one else.
Perhaps some one is waiting for you.

2885
04:09:31.280 --> 04:09:37.200
Perhaps now by this time you are
married. She forced herself to look at

2886
04:09:37.280 --> 04:09:41.959
him with her faint smile, a
languid, pale courtesy which parted her lips,

2887
04:09:41.079 --> 04:09:46.040
but sadly, and her voice was
mildly blank, devoid of any special

2888
04:09:46.079 --> 04:09:52.280
interest. He started at her words. They conveyed a suggestion which had never

2889
04:09:52.319 --> 04:09:56.920
occurred to him, A strange idea
transferred from her to him, but it

2890
04:09:56.959 --> 04:10:01.799
took no root and perished instantly married. Oh Eva, no, never,

2891
04:10:03.319 --> 04:10:09.239
he exclaimed, Well, such a
thing might have been, said she coolly.

2892
04:10:09.399 --> 04:10:13.079
They were silent for a while,
but in a few moments, Eva,

2893
04:10:13.280 --> 04:10:18.559
touched by the tone of his last
words, could no longer contain herself

2894
04:10:18.799 --> 04:10:24.079
and began to cry gently like a
frightened child, sobbing spasmodically as they walked

2895
04:10:24.079 --> 04:10:30.680
on, the tears soaking her white
gauze veil in front of their hotel,

2896
04:10:30.799 --> 04:10:35.760
she stopped, and, controlling herself
for a moment, said Frank, be

2897
04:10:35.879 --> 04:10:39.559
honest with me. Do you not
think it odious of me to have spoken

2898
04:10:39.639 --> 04:10:41.440
to you? I could not make
up my mind what I ought to do,

2899
04:10:41.879 --> 04:10:46.000
but I so much wanted to confess
myself wrong and ask you to forgive

2900
04:10:46.040 --> 04:10:50.639
me. Do you despise me for
doing such a thing which perhaps some other

2901
04:10:50.719 --> 04:10:56.959
girl would never have done? Despise
you? I despise you, cried he

2902
04:10:58.120 --> 04:11:01.280
with a gulp. But he could
say no more, for some visitors were

2903
04:11:01.319 --> 04:11:05.280
coming towards them, though, but
few were out on this windy and threatening

2904
04:11:05.399 --> 04:11:11.680
day. They went a little further, hanging their heads like criminals under the

2905
04:11:11.719 --> 04:11:20.879
eyes of the strangers. Then they
turned into the hotel four. Sir Archibald

2906
04:11:20.959 --> 04:11:26.280
received Frank somewhat coolly, though civilly. Then he left them together, and

2907
04:11:26.360 --> 04:11:31.399
Eva at once began sit down.
Frank, I have something to tell you,

2908
04:11:31.440 --> 04:11:35.479
he obeyed, in some surprise.
Her tone was business like, her

2909
04:11:35.479 --> 04:11:39.280
emotion was suppressed, and she seemed
to be prepared to make some clear and

2910
04:11:39.360 --> 04:11:45.840
logical statements. Frank said, she
you once wrote a letter to Papa,

2911
04:11:46.000 --> 04:11:50.239
did you not, Yes? He
nodded, sadly, You did, she

2912
04:11:50.399 --> 04:11:56.920
exclaimed eagerly. Yes, he repeated, two to you, and one to

2913
04:11:56.959 --> 04:12:01.120
sir Archibald, what two to me? Well, she cried in dismay.

2914
04:12:01.959 --> 04:12:07.360
Yes, he nodded once more,
and you had no answers, She went

2915
04:12:07.399 --> 04:12:11.600
on more calmly. Did you ever
wonder why why, he echoed in surprise,

2916
04:12:13.239 --> 04:12:16.840
because you were offended because I had
been so rough, no, said

2917
04:12:16.879 --> 04:12:22.799
she very positively. Simply and solely
because we never received your letters, what

2918
04:12:24.600 --> 04:12:30.639
cried Vestova, They never reached us. Our servant William seems to have had

2919
04:12:30.639 --> 04:12:37.319
some interest in keeping them back,
some interest, repeated Frank Dully, bewildered

2920
04:12:37.879 --> 04:12:41.639
Why that? I do not know, replied Eva. All I know is

2921
04:12:41.680 --> 04:12:46.639
this our maid Kate, who remember
her, came crying one day to tell

2922
04:12:46.680 --> 04:12:50.479
me that she could not stay any
longer, for she was afraid of William,

2923
04:12:50.600 --> 04:12:54.920
who had declared that he would murder
her. I inquired what had happened,

2924
04:12:56.319 --> 04:12:58.639
and then she told me that she
had once been just about to bring

2925
04:12:58.719 --> 04:13:05.120
up a letter to Papa in your
handwriting. She knew your writing. William

2926
04:13:05.159 --> 04:13:07.479
had come behind her when she was
close to the door and had snatched it

2927
04:13:07.520 --> 04:13:11.600
from her, saying that he would
carry it in, But instead of doing

2928
04:13:11.600 --> 04:13:16.079
so, he had put the letter
into his pocket. She had asked him

2929
04:13:16.120 --> 04:13:20.040
what he meant by it. Then
they had a violent quarrel, and ever

2930
04:13:20.079 --> 04:13:24.879
since she had been afraid of the
man. She had wanted to tell me

2931
04:13:24.920 --> 04:13:28.879
a long time ago, but dared
not for fear of William. We questioned

2932
04:13:28.920 --> 04:13:33.399
William, who was rough and sulky, and considered himself offended by our doubts

2933
04:13:33.399 --> 04:13:37.920
of his honesty. Papa had his
room searched to see if he had stolen

2934
04:13:39.040 --> 04:13:43.280
any more letters or other things.
Nothing, however, was to be found,

2935
04:13:43.799 --> 04:13:48.120
neither stolen articles, nor letters,
nor even the letter to Papa,

2936
04:13:48.639 --> 04:13:52.360
which seems to be the last of
the three. You wrote, it,

2937
04:13:52.639 --> 04:13:58.600
was said Frank. Of course Papa
dismissed the man, And oh what was

2938
04:13:58.680 --> 04:14:01.280
it? I wanted to tell you? I cannot remember. So you wrote

2939
04:14:01.440 --> 04:14:07.479
actually three times? Indeed I did
three times. And what did you say,

2940
04:14:07.920 --> 04:14:11.760
she asked, with a sob in
her throat. I ask you to

2941
04:14:11.840 --> 04:14:16.360
forgive me, and whether whether all
could not be the same again. I

2942
04:14:16.399 --> 04:14:20.760
confessed that I had been wrong,
but you were not, perhaps not,

2943
04:14:22.200 --> 04:14:26.280
I cannot tell now I felt it. So then I waited and waited for

2944
04:14:26.360 --> 04:14:31.719
a word from you or your father, and none came. No, none,

2945
04:14:31.760 --> 04:14:35.520
She sighed, and then what could
I have done? Why did you

2946
04:14:35.559 --> 04:14:41.040
not come yourself? Oh? Why
did you never come near us? She

2947
04:14:41.200 --> 04:14:46.360
wailed reproachfully. He was silent for
a minute, collecting his thoughts. He

2948
04:14:46.399 --> 04:14:52.079
could not remember it all. Tell
me, Frank, she said softly,

2949
04:14:52.559 --> 04:14:56.799
Why did you not come yourself?
I cannot remember exactly, he said,

2950
04:14:58.000 --> 04:15:03.559
dully. Then you did think of
it, yes, certainly, said he.

2951
04:15:03.319 --> 04:15:07.920
Then how was it that you never
came? Frank suddenly broke down.

2952
04:15:09.719 --> 04:15:15.120
He gulped down his tears with difficulty, a gulp of anguish. Because I

2953
04:15:15.239 --> 04:15:18.959
was heart broken, because I was
so wretched, so unspeakably wretched. I

2954
04:15:20.040 --> 04:15:24.639
had always taken rather cynical views of
women and love and so forth, and

2955
04:15:24.680 --> 04:15:28.280
then when I met you, it
was all so new, so fresh to

2956
04:15:28.319 --> 04:15:31.239
me. I felt myself a boy
again. I was in love with you,

2957
04:15:31.440 --> 04:15:35.600
not only for your beauty, but
for everything you said and did,

2958
04:15:35.079 --> 04:15:39.879
for being what you are, always
so calm and sweet, good God,

2959
04:15:41.200 --> 04:15:45.639
I adored you, Eva. Then
there was that change that doubts, that

2960
04:15:45.799 --> 04:15:50.959
dreadful time. I cannot remember it
all now, and I felt so forlorn

2961
04:15:50.000 --> 04:15:56.239
and broken hearted I could have died
then, Eva, Eva, you were

2962
04:15:56.280 --> 04:16:00.479
so miserable and you did not come
to me. No, but good Heavens,

2963
04:16:00.479 --> 04:16:04.840
why not I wanted to go to
you? And why did you not

2964
04:16:06.040 --> 04:16:11.040
do it? Then again he sat
lost in thought, his brain seemed clouded.

2965
04:16:12.079 --> 04:16:17.120
Ah, yes, I think I
remember all about it now, he

2966
04:16:17.200 --> 04:16:22.440
said, slowly. I wanted to
go, And then Bertie said, what

2967
04:16:22.680 --> 04:16:26.520
did Bertie say that? He thought
to me a fool for my pains,

2968
04:16:26.920 --> 04:16:32.319
A coward and a cur and a
fool. But why because you had disbelieved

2969
04:16:32.360 --> 04:16:36.680
my word? And then I thought
perhaps he was right? And I did

2970
04:16:36.680 --> 04:16:42.159
not go. She flung herself on
a sofa in utter woe, weeping passionately.

2971
04:16:44.120 --> 04:16:48.799
Then it was what Bertie said,
She cried, reproachfully. Yes,

2972
04:16:48.479 --> 04:16:53.959
nothing else, he said, mournfully, God in heaven. That alone.

2973
04:16:56.000 --> 04:17:02.280
They were both silent. Then Eva
sat upright again, shivering. Her face

2974
04:17:02.440 --> 04:17:06.799
was white and bloodless, her eyes
fixed with a dull, vacant glare,

2975
04:17:07.200 --> 04:17:12.120
like weathered glass. Oh, Frank, she cried, Frank, I am

2976
04:17:12.280 --> 04:17:18.479
so frightened. It is coming what
what he asked? In alarm? I

2977
04:17:18.600 --> 04:17:22.959
felt its coming upon me, she
moaned, panting. It is like the

2978
04:17:23.040 --> 04:17:27.840
sound of distant thunder droning in my
ears and in my brain. Great heavens,

2979
04:17:29.120 --> 04:17:30.879
it is close to me. Frank, oh, frank, it is

2980
04:17:30.920 --> 04:17:36.840
above me, over me. The
thunder is over my head. She shrieked

2981
04:17:36.879 --> 04:17:41.159
and fought the air with her arms
as if to beat something off, and

2982
04:17:41.239 --> 04:17:47.159
her slender frame was convulsed as from
a series of mysterious electric shocks. Her

2983
04:17:47.200 --> 04:17:51.680
breath came rattling in her throat.
Then she tottered, and he thought she

2984
04:17:51.719 --> 04:17:56.079
would have fallen. He clasped her
in his arms. Eva, Eva,

2985
04:17:56.559 --> 04:18:02.399
he cried. She allowed him to
drag her to the sofa without making any

2986
04:18:02.440 --> 04:18:07.959
resistance, happy in his embrace in
spite of her hallucination. And there she

2987
04:18:07.040 --> 04:18:12.040
remains sitting by him, with his
arm round her, cowering against his breast.

2988
04:18:12.879 --> 04:18:17.520
Eva, come, Eva, what
is it that ails you? It

2989
04:18:17.600 --> 04:18:22.920
has passed over, she murmured,
almost inaudibly. Yes, it is gone,

2990
04:18:22.920 --> 04:18:26.440
now it is gone. It has
come over me so often lately.

2991
04:18:26.040 --> 04:18:32.079
It comes roaring on slowly and stealthily, and then it breaks over my head,

2992
04:18:32.440 --> 04:18:36.479
shaking me to the core, and
then it goes away, dies away

2993
04:18:36.799 --> 04:18:41.159
away. I am in such terror
of it. It is like a monster

2994
04:18:41.200 --> 04:18:45.079
which comes bellowing at me, and
it frightens me. So what can it

2995
04:18:45.159 --> 04:18:52.040
be I cannot tell overwrought nerves,
perhaps, he said consolingly. Oh,

2996
04:18:52.120 --> 04:18:56.559
hold me close, she said,
caressingly, Hold me tightly to you.

2997
04:18:56.280 --> 04:19:00.600
When I am alone, after it
is past. I am left in such

2998
04:19:00.680 --> 04:19:04.680
deadly fear. But now now I
have you you once more, you will

2999
04:19:04.719 --> 04:19:08.719
not cast me from you again.
You will protect me, your poor little

3000
04:19:08.760 --> 04:19:12.639
evil, will you not? Ah? Yes, I have you back now.

3001
04:19:14.040 --> 04:19:17.479
I knew, I felt I should
have you back some day, and

3002
04:19:17.559 --> 04:19:22.639
I have made Papa come to Scaveningen
every summer. I had an idea that

3003
04:19:22.680 --> 04:19:26.159
you must be somewhere in Holland,
at the Hague or at Scaveningen, that

3004
04:19:26.239 --> 04:19:30.079
if we were ever to meet again, it would be here. And now

3005
04:19:30.200 --> 04:19:34.159
it has happened. And I have
you once more. Hold me tightly now

3006
04:19:34.559 --> 04:19:40.479
in both arms, both arms.
Then I shall not be frightened. She

3007
04:19:40.639 --> 04:19:45.040
clung more closely to his breast,
her head on his shoulder, and then,

3008
04:19:45.399 --> 04:19:49.159
in a voice like a child's luke, she said, holding out her

3009
04:19:49.159 --> 04:19:57.159
wrist, What asked he that little
scar you did that I did? Yes,

3010
04:19:57.719 --> 04:20:03.239
you clutched me by the ri lists. He felt utterly miserable in spite

3011
04:20:03.239 --> 04:20:07.000
of having found her again. Had
he covered the line of the scar with

3012
04:20:07.120 --> 04:20:14.200
little kisses, She laughed quietly.
It's a bracelet, she said lightly.

3013
04:20:15.239 --> 04:20:26.840
End of section seven, Section eight
of Footsteps of Fate by Luis Kuperus.

3014
04:20:27.799 --> 04:20:34.639
This libery vox recording is in the
public domain Part four, five and six

3015
04:20:37.159 --> 04:20:45.319
five. Presently, however, he
started up eva he began suddenly recollecting himself.

3016
04:20:45.200 --> 04:20:51.840
How why what is it? She
said, laughing, but a little

3017
04:20:51.879 --> 04:20:56.719
exhausted after her strange fear of the
fancied thunder? Those letters? Why did

3018
04:20:56.719 --> 04:21:02.239
William? What could they matter to
William? Not make curiosity to see what

3019
04:21:02.399 --> 04:21:06.639
was in them? He would not
have snatched that last one so roughly from

3020
04:21:06.719 --> 04:21:11.399
Kate if it had been all no, no, Then you think he had

3021
04:21:11.440 --> 04:21:15.639
some interest I do? But what
Why should he care whether I wrote to

3022
04:21:15.680 --> 04:21:21.959
you or no? Perhaps he was
acting for well, for someone else,

3023
04:21:22.760 --> 04:21:26.719
but for whom. What concern could
my letters be of anybody's? What advantage

3024
04:21:26.719 --> 04:21:30.879
could it be to anyone to hinder
or getting them? She sat up and

3025
04:21:30.920 --> 04:21:36.280
looked at him for some time,
without speaking, dreading the questions she must

3026
04:21:36.319 --> 04:21:41.719
ask. Can you barely think of
no one? She said? No?

3027
04:21:41.600 --> 04:21:48.239
Did no one know that you had
written? No one but Bertie Ah only

3028
04:21:48.440 --> 04:21:53.239
Bertie, said she with emphasis.
But Bertie, no, surely, he

3029
04:21:53.319 --> 04:22:00.399
asked her, indignant at so preposterous
a suspicion, Perhaps, she whispered,

3030
04:22:00.840 --> 04:22:10.159
almost inaudibly. Perhaps Bertie eva impossible. Why how she sank back into her

3031
04:22:10.200 --> 04:22:14.879
former attitude, her head on his
breast, trembling still from the impression of

3032
04:22:14.920 --> 04:22:18.680
the thunder she had heard, and
she went on, I know nothing.

3033
04:22:18.159 --> 04:22:22.920
I only think I have thought it
over day after day for two years,

3034
04:22:23.399 --> 04:22:27.760
and I have begun to find a
great deal that seems mysterious in what had

3035
04:22:27.799 --> 04:22:33.520
never before been puzzling, but indeed
sympathetic to me in Bertie. You know,

3036
04:22:34.000 --> 04:22:38.280
we often used to talk together and
sometimes alone. You were a little

3037
04:22:38.360 --> 04:22:42.799
jealous sometimes, but you had not
the smallest reason for it, for there

3038
04:22:42.840 --> 04:22:47.399
was never anything to make you.
So we were like a brother and sister.

3039
04:22:47.920 --> 04:22:52.799
We often talked of you. Well. Afterwards, I remembered those talks,

3040
04:22:52.200 --> 04:22:56.879
and it struck me that Bertie,
yes, that Bertie, that he

3041
04:22:56.959 --> 04:23:02.479
did not speak of you as a
true friend should I'm not sure when he

3042
04:23:02.600 --> 04:23:04.959
was talking. It never occurred to
me, for Bertie had a tone and

3043
04:23:06.040 --> 04:23:10.360
a way of saying things. I
always fancied then that he meant well by

3044
04:23:10.440 --> 04:23:12.680
us both, and that he really
cared for us, but that he was

3045
04:23:12.719 --> 04:23:18.680
afraid of something happening, some evil, some catastrophe, if we were married.

3046
04:23:18.360 --> 04:23:22.959
He seemed to think that we ought
not to marry. When afterwards I

3047
04:23:22.040 --> 04:23:26.600
thought over what he had said,
that was always the impression. He really

3048
04:23:26.600 --> 04:23:32.760
seemed to think that we that we
ought never to be married. She closed

3049
04:23:32.760 --> 04:23:37.239
her eyes, worn out by this
effort to solve the enigmas of the past,

3050
04:23:37.799 --> 04:23:40.799
and she took his hand and stroked
it as she held it in her

3051
04:23:40.840 --> 04:23:45.159
own. He too, tried to
look into that labyrinth of the past,

3052
04:23:45.719 --> 04:23:49.639
but he could discern nothing. His
memory carried him back to their last days

3053
04:23:49.680 --> 04:23:56.719
in London, and he did recall
something. He recollected Van Mayhorn's stern tone

3054
04:23:56.799 --> 04:24:02.600
when he Vestova had said that he
should call at the roads. He remembered

3055
04:24:02.639 --> 04:24:07.120
Bertie's urgent haste to get out of
London and wonder about the world. Could

3056
04:24:07.159 --> 04:24:11.479
Bertie had Bertie any interest? But
he could not discern it in the simplicity

3057
04:24:11.479 --> 04:24:17.120
of his unpractical, heedlessly liberal friendship, which had never taken any account of

3058
04:24:17.159 --> 04:24:22.200
expenses, always sharing what he had
with his companion because he had plenty,

3059
04:24:22.360 --> 04:24:26.360
and the other had nothing. He
could not see it, since he had

3060
04:24:26.360 --> 04:24:30.440
never thought of such a possibility in
his strange indifference to everything that approached money

3061
04:24:30.440 --> 04:24:37.319
matters, an indifference so complete as
to constitute a mental deficiency, as another

3062
04:24:37.360 --> 04:24:41.360
man is indifferent to all that concerns
politics or art or what not, matters

3063
04:24:41.360 --> 04:24:45.840
which he held so cheap and understood
so little, and could only shake his

3064
04:24:45.920 --> 04:24:52.479
head over it, as over an
abracadabra he looked, but saw not you

3065
04:24:52.600 --> 04:24:56.680
see? I fancy it afterwards that
Bertie had been opposed to our marrying,

3066
04:24:57.200 --> 04:25:03.319
Eva repeated dreamily, and then,
bewildered by the mystery which life had woven

3067
04:25:03.399 --> 04:25:07.719
about her, she went on,
tell me, Frank, what was there

3068
04:25:07.760 --> 04:25:11.559
in him? What was he?
Who was he? Why would you never

3069
04:25:11.639 --> 04:25:15.680
tell me anything about him? For
I discovered that too later during those two

3070
04:25:15.799 --> 04:25:21.719
years when I thought out so many
things. He looked at her in dismay,

3071
04:25:22.280 --> 04:25:26.760
bitter self reproach came upon him,
but never having told her that Bertie

3072
04:25:26.920 --> 04:25:30.479
was poor, penniless, and dependent
on his friend's bounty. Why was it

3073
04:25:30.520 --> 04:25:34.040
he had never told her? Was
it out of a sense of shame at

3074
04:25:34.120 --> 04:25:40.600
being himself so careless, so foolishly
weak about a concern in which others were

3075
04:25:40.639 --> 04:25:47.520
so cautious and prudent, so foolishly
weak, careless to imbecility. And still

3076
04:25:47.680 --> 04:25:52.079
he looked at her in dismay.
Then a suspicion of the truth flashed across

3077
04:25:52.079 --> 04:25:56.959
his mind like the zigzag glimmer of
distant lightning, and he shrank from its

3078
04:25:57.040 --> 04:26:03.639
lurid gleam. Eva, he said, I will go to Bertie. To

3079
04:26:03.840 --> 04:26:10.559
Bertie. She shrieked, is he
here? Yes? He here? Oh?

3080
04:26:10.639 --> 04:26:14.200
I had never thought of that.
I fancied he was away, far

3081
04:26:14.319 --> 04:26:18.159
away, dead. Perhaps I did
not care what had become of him.

3082
04:26:18.559 --> 04:26:22.479
Great God. Here, Frank.
I implore you, Frank, leave him,

3083
04:26:22.719 --> 04:26:26.319
do not go near him. But
Eva, I must ask him.

3084
04:26:27.000 --> 04:26:30.520
No, Frank, oh, Frank, for God's sake, do not go.

3085
04:26:30.959 --> 04:26:36.760
I am afraid, afraid. Do
not go. He soothed her gently

3086
04:26:36.799 --> 04:26:41.239
with a soft, sad smile,
which just lifted his yellow mustache. With

3087
04:26:41.319 --> 04:26:47.280
grave fondness in his honest eyes.
He soothed and petted her very gently to

3088
04:26:47.360 --> 04:26:51.719
reassure her. Do not be afraid, my darling. I will be quite

3089
04:26:51.799 --> 04:26:56.399
calm. But still I must ask, don't you see? Wait for me

3090
04:26:56.440 --> 04:27:00.920
here? I will return in the
evening, Can you really be Oh,

3091
04:27:00.959 --> 04:27:03.760
you had better not go. I
promise you I will be quite calm,

3092
04:27:03.920 --> 04:27:10.079
quite cool, And he embraced her
fondly, closely, with passionate fervor.

3093
04:27:11.079 --> 04:27:15.120
Then you are mine once more,
he asked. She threw her arms round

3094
04:27:15.120 --> 04:27:19.319
his neck and kissed his lips,
his eyes, his face. Yes,

3095
04:27:21.040 --> 04:27:25.440
she said, I am yours.
Do what you will with me till we

3096
04:27:25.479 --> 04:27:30.399
meet again, then said he,
and he quitted the house. Eva,

3097
04:27:30.600 --> 04:27:33.959
left alone, looked about her with
a shudder, as if seeking the evil

3098
04:27:34.079 --> 04:27:40.280
she dreaded. She was afraid,
afraid for herself and for Frank, but

3099
04:27:40.440 --> 04:27:45.360
chiefly for Frank. In an instant, her fears had risen to intolerable horror.

3100
04:27:45.280 --> 04:27:49.959
She heard her father's step in the
passage. She recognized his shuffling tread.

3101
04:27:51.959 --> 04:27:55.639
It was impossible to her to meet
him. Just then, she snatched

3102
04:27:55.719 --> 04:27:59.360
up a cloak and wrapped it about
her, pulling the hood up over her

3103
04:27:59.360 --> 04:28:07.639
head as she rushed out of doors. It was raining heavily. Six Frank

3104
04:28:07.719 --> 04:28:12.079
found Van Maren at home, and
Bertie saw at once that it had come.

3105
04:28:14.120 --> 04:28:17.959
He read it in Frank's drawn face, heard it in the thick utterance

3106
04:28:18.000 --> 04:28:22.559
of his voice. And at the
same time he felt that the lax springs

3107
04:28:22.600 --> 04:28:26.959
of his determination were trying to brace
themselves in despair, in self defense,

3108
04:28:27.319 --> 04:28:33.040
and that they failed. Bertie said, Vestova, I want to speak to

3109
04:28:33.079 --> 04:28:38.680
you, to ask you something.
Bertie made no reply. His legs quaked.

3110
04:28:40.159 --> 04:28:42.639
He was sitting in a large cane
chair, and he did not move.

3111
04:28:44.799 --> 04:28:48.000
I have just met Eva. Frank
went on, and I went with

3112
04:28:48.040 --> 04:28:51.479
her to see her father. So
Archibald tells me that they have been here

3113
04:28:51.520 --> 04:28:56.799
some weeks. Still Bertie spoke not. He gazed up at Frank with his

3114
04:28:56.920 --> 04:29:02.879
deep black eyes, and their brilliancy
was overcast by distress and fear. Frank

3115
04:29:02.920 --> 04:29:06.360
stood in front of him, and
he now passed his hand over his brow

3116
04:29:06.440 --> 04:29:11.239
in some confusion. He had at
first purpose to tell his story, and

3117
04:29:11.280 --> 04:29:15.680
then quite calmly, to ask a
question. But something he knew, not

3118
04:29:15.799 --> 04:29:21.639
what in Bertie's cat like indolence roused
his anger made him furious with him for

3119
04:29:21.680 --> 04:29:25.920
the first time in all the years
he had known him. He was angry

3120
04:29:25.959 --> 04:29:30.760
that Bertie could stay there, half
lying down languidly at ease, his graceful

3121
04:29:30.840 --> 04:29:34.840
hand hanging over the arm of the
lounge, and he did not detect that

3122
04:29:34.959 --> 04:29:41.959
his attitude at this moment was assumed
merely to conceal an all too overwhelming agitation.

3123
04:29:41.799 --> 04:29:48.680
Had Frank's intention of telling a logical
tale and asking a plain question suddenly

3124
04:29:48.719 --> 04:29:52.120
collapsed in rage, giving way to
a mad desire to know at once,

3125
04:29:52.680 --> 04:29:57.520
at once. Listen to me,
Bertie, you remember the three letters that

3126
04:29:57.600 --> 04:30:02.559
I wrote before we left London.
Eva tells me they were kept back by

3127
04:30:02.600 --> 04:30:07.319
their servants. William. Do you
know anything about it? Bertie was silent,

3128
04:30:07.639 --> 04:30:11.799
but his eyes were fixed on Frank
with dull, anxious entreaty. No

3129
04:30:11.879 --> 04:30:17.040
one knew of the existence of those
letters. But you have you any suspicion

3130
04:30:17.120 --> 04:30:21.280
why it should be to William's interest
to suppress them? Then? No,

3131
04:30:21.959 --> 04:30:26.760
how should I said Bertie, scarcely
above his breath. Come speak out,

3132
04:30:27.079 --> 04:30:32.639
cried Vestova, quivering in every muscle. You must know something about it,

3133
04:30:32.920 --> 04:30:37.399
that is quite clear. You must
speak out. All thought of self defense

3134
04:30:37.559 --> 04:30:45.760
melted away under the vehemence of Frank's
tone. Bertie hardly had any curiosity even

3135
04:30:45.840 --> 04:30:49.360
to know what had occurred to betray
William's complicity, and he felt that it

3136
04:30:49.399 --> 04:30:55.760
would be easiest now to give himself
up completely without reserve, since that which

3137
04:30:55.799 --> 04:31:00.000
he had been dreading for weeks had
come upon him inevitably and fatally, since

3138
04:31:00.040 --> 04:31:06.559
whatever was to happen would happen inevitably
and fatally. And in his weakness he

3139
04:31:06.680 --> 04:31:11.319
was conscious of the horrible pathos,
the hopeless pity of his being what he

3140
04:31:11.559 --> 04:31:15.399
was, of things being as they
were. Well, then he muttered,

3141
04:31:15.399 --> 04:31:22.079
dejectedly, I do know what do
you know? It was I who who

3142
04:31:22.120 --> 04:31:26.760
did what? Who bribed William not
to deliver the letters? Vestova looked at

3143
04:31:26.799 --> 04:31:33.479
him in dumb astonishment. Darkness clouded
his sight. Everything was in a whirl.

3144
04:31:33.920 --> 04:31:37.840
He did not hear, did not
understand, forgetting that the truth had

3145
04:31:37.879 --> 04:31:42.920
already flashed across his brain. You
you, he gasped, My god,

3146
04:31:44.319 --> 04:31:51.440
but why vanam Heron got up.
He burst into tears, because because I

3147
04:31:51.520 --> 04:31:56.600
don't know, I cannot tell you. It is too vile. Vestovah had

3148
04:31:56.639 --> 04:32:00.639
seized him by the shoulders. He
shook him and said, in horse raar,

3149
04:32:00.120 --> 04:32:03.680
you damned villain. You will not
tell me. Why you will not

3150
04:32:03.760 --> 04:32:07.840
tell me? Almost I shake it
out of your body. Why tell me

3151
04:32:07.920 --> 04:32:15.200
this instant? Because because sobbed Van
Mehren, wringing his white hands, tell

3152
04:32:15.239 --> 04:32:21.440
me out with it because I wanted
to stay with you, and because if

3153
04:32:21.479 --> 04:32:25.159
you married, I should have had
to go. I was so fond of

3154
04:32:25.200 --> 04:32:30.479
you, and speak out. You
were so fond of me and then and

3155
04:32:30.520 --> 04:32:33.840
you were so kind to me.
You gave me everything. I foresaw that

3156
04:32:33.959 --> 04:32:37.959
I should have to work for my
living again. And I was so well

3157
04:32:37.000 --> 04:32:41.360
off where I was, Frank,
Frank, listen to me. Hear what

3158
04:32:41.399 --> 04:32:45.840
I have to tell you. Before
you say anything, before you are angry,

3159
04:32:45.200 --> 04:32:49.280
let me explain. Do not condemn
me till you know. Oh,

3160
04:32:49.399 --> 04:32:52.799
yes, it was base of me
to do what I did. But let

3161
04:32:52.799 --> 04:32:56.079
me say a word, and do
not be angry, Frank, till you

3162
04:32:56.159 --> 04:33:00.680
know everything. Frank. Try to
see me as I am. I am

3163
04:33:00.719 --> 04:33:04.200
as God made me, and I
cannot help it. I would have been

3164
04:33:04.240 --> 04:33:08.040
different if I could, And I
only did what I could not help doing.

3165
04:33:08.599 --> 04:33:11.880
Indeed, I could not help it. I was driven to it by

3166
04:33:11.919 --> 04:33:18.000
a power outside me. I was
so weak, so tired. I could

3167
04:33:18.040 --> 04:33:22.000
rest with you. And though you
may not believe me, I loved you,

3168
04:33:22.240 --> 04:33:25.599
I worshiped you, and you wanted
to turn me out and make me

3169
04:33:25.720 --> 04:33:30.479
work. Then it was then I
did it. Hear me, Frank,

3170
04:33:30.919 --> 04:33:34.119
let me tell you all. I
must tell you all. I made either

3171
04:33:34.240 --> 04:33:38.080
believe that you did not really love
her. I made her doubt you so

3172
04:33:38.159 --> 04:33:42.720
that everything was broken off between you
and the letters. I stopped them.

3173
04:33:44.119 --> 04:33:48.200
It was all my doing, Frank, all all. And I hated myself

3174
04:33:48.240 --> 04:33:52.360
while I did it because I was
not different from what I am. But

3175
04:33:52.479 --> 04:33:56.720
I could not help it. I
was made so. And you do not

3176
04:33:56.919 --> 04:34:00.639
understand me. I am such a
strange mixture that you cannot understand. But

3177
04:34:00.799 --> 04:34:04.119
try to understand me, and you
will, Frank, And then you will

3178
04:34:04.159 --> 04:34:08.159
forgive me. Perhaps you will even
forgive me. Oh, believe me,

3179
04:34:08.319 --> 04:34:12.680
I beseech you. I am not
wholly selfish. I love you with all

3180
04:34:12.680 --> 04:34:18.040
my soul, so truly as one
man hardly ever loves another. Because you

3181
04:34:18.080 --> 04:34:22.560
were so good to me. I
can prove it to you. Did I

3182
04:34:22.599 --> 04:34:26.439
not stick by you when you had
lost all your money in America? If

3183
04:34:26.479 --> 04:34:30.200
I had been selfish, should I
not have left you then? But I

3184
04:34:30.240 --> 04:34:33.759
stayed with you. I worked with
you, and we shared everything and were

3185
04:34:33.799 --> 04:34:38.360
happy. Oh why did not things
remain as they were? Now? You

3186
04:34:38.400 --> 04:34:44.479
have met her? And now have
you done with words? Roared Frank?

3187
04:34:45.000 --> 04:34:48.479
So you did this? You wrecked
all that life held for me. God

3188
04:34:48.520 --> 04:34:53.360
in Heaven, is it possible?
No, you are right, I do

3189
04:34:53.479 --> 04:34:59.560
not understand you. He ended with
a venomous laugh, his face crimson,

3190
04:34:59.720 --> 04:35:04.279
and he eyes starting with rage.
Bertie had dropped crouching in a heap on

3191
04:35:04.360 --> 04:35:10.680
the ground and sobbed aloud. Oh
but try to understand, he entreated.

3192
04:35:11.159 --> 04:35:15.880
Try to see a fellow creature as
he is, in all his comfortless nakedness,

3193
04:35:15.279 --> 04:35:21.159
with no conventional rappings. My God, I swear to you that I

3194
04:35:21.200 --> 04:35:23.720
wish I was different, But how
can I help being what I am?

3195
04:35:25.159 --> 04:35:29.040
I was born without any option of
my own. I was endowed with a

3196
04:35:29.119 --> 04:35:33.680
brain, and I must think,
and I think otherwise than I gladly would

3197
04:35:33.720 --> 04:35:37.759
think. And I have been tossed
through life like a ball. Like a

3198
04:35:37.799 --> 04:35:41.919
ball, What could I do thus
tossed? But try to keep my head

3199
04:35:42.000 --> 04:35:47.840
up? Strength of will, strength
of mind. I do not know whether

3200
04:35:47.880 --> 04:35:52.360
you have any, but I have
never never felt such a thing. When

3201
04:35:52.360 --> 04:35:55.439
I do a thing, it is
because I must, because I can do

3202
04:35:55.560 --> 04:35:59.720
no otherwise. For though I may
have the wish to act differently, the

3203
04:36:00.000 --> 04:36:06.680
strength and energy are not there.
Believe me, I despise myself. Believe

3204
04:36:06.799 --> 04:36:12.639
that Frank And tried to understand and
to forgive words words you are raving,

3205
04:36:14.159 --> 04:36:18.520
growled Frank, I do not know
what all your talk means. I can

3206
04:36:18.599 --> 04:36:22.599
understand nothing at this moment, and
even if I could, at this moment,

3207
04:36:22.080 --> 04:36:26.880
I would not. All I understand
is that you have ruined me,

3208
04:36:26.400 --> 04:36:30.720
that you have destroyed my whole life's
joy, and that you are a low

3209
04:36:30.799 --> 04:36:37.400
scoundrel who bribed a servant to stop
my letters out of gross, vile,

3210
04:36:37.759 --> 04:36:42.319
unfathomable selfishness. Bribed him. Tell
me, rascal, wretch, coward,

3211
04:36:42.799 --> 04:36:48.040
bribed him with what in Heaven's name? Tell me with what you bribed him

3212
04:36:48.799 --> 04:36:55.919
with with? But Van mehr And
hesitated in abject fear, for Westover had

3213
04:36:55.959 --> 04:36:59.880
collared him by the waistcoats as he
groveled on the floor, and shook him

3214
04:36:59.880 --> 04:37:04.520
again and again by thunder, you
villain. You bribed him with my money,

3215
04:37:04.959 --> 04:37:10.400
with my own money. Tell me
speak, or I'll kick it out

3216
04:37:10.400 --> 04:37:15.799
of you. Yes, with my
money, Yes, yes, yes.

3217
04:37:17.080 --> 04:37:21.360
Frank flung him down with a yell
of contempt, of loathing of such a

3218
04:37:21.400 --> 04:37:26.840
thing as he. But Vana Meheron
was experiencing a reaction from his self abasement.

3219
04:37:26.599 --> 04:37:30.880
The world was so stupid. Men
were stupid. Frank was stupid.

3220
04:37:32.880 --> 04:37:36.799
He did not understand that a man
should be such as he Bertie was.

3221
04:37:37.639 --> 04:37:41.680
He could not understand. He bellowed
out in his brutal rage, like some

3222
04:37:41.840 --> 04:37:48.040
wild beast without brains or sense.
He himself had brains. Happier was he

3223
04:37:48.119 --> 04:37:52.880
who had none. He envied Frank
his lack of them. He sprang up

3224
04:37:52.919 --> 04:37:59.639
with one leap. Yes, yes, yes, he hissed it hard if

3225
04:37:59.639 --> 04:38:03.959
you don't understand, if you are
too idiotic to take it in, yes,

3226
04:38:03.080 --> 04:38:07.720
I say, yes, yes,
yes, I bribed him with your

3227
04:38:07.799 --> 04:38:11.000
money that you were so kind as
to give me. The very last day,

3228
04:38:11.040 --> 04:38:15.919
when we were leaving London, you
gave me one hundred pounds to pay

3229
04:38:15.919 --> 04:38:21.840
William. Do you remember to pay
William? You do not understand, well,

3230
04:38:22.240 --> 04:38:26.400
you don't understand. You're a stupid
brute without brains, Aye, and

3231
04:38:26.479 --> 04:38:30.159
I envy you for having none.
There was a time when I had none.

3232
04:38:30.479 --> 04:38:33.799
And do you know how I came
by them? Why? Through you?

3233
04:38:34.720 --> 04:38:38.560
There was a time when I toiled
and worked and never thought and never

3234
04:38:38.639 --> 04:38:42.959
cared. I ate all I earned, and when I earned nothing, I

3235
04:38:44.040 --> 04:38:48.639
went hungry and I was happy.
It was you, You who fed me

3236
04:38:48.680 --> 04:38:52.479
on dainties and gave me wine to
drink. And it was you who clothed

3237
04:38:52.560 --> 04:38:56.279
me so that I had not to
work, but had nothing to do but

3238
04:38:56.400 --> 04:39:03.159
to think, think in my contempt
idleness all day long. And now I

3239
04:39:03.200 --> 04:39:07.799
only wish I could crack my skull
open and throw my brains in your face.

3240
04:39:07.119 --> 04:39:12.159
Having made me what I am,
so finikin and full of ideas you

3241
04:39:12.200 --> 04:39:18.279
don't understand, then perhaps you will
not understand that at this moment I feel

3242
04:39:18.319 --> 04:39:21.959
no gratitude for all you have done
for me, that I hate you for

3243
04:39:22.040 --> 04:39:26.040
it, all that I despise you, and that you have made my life

3244
04:39:26.200 --> 04:39:30.400
infinitely more wretched than I have made
yours. Do you understand that much at

3245
04:39:30.439 --> 04:39:34.759
any rate? Ah, that I
despise you and hate you, hate you.

3246
04:39:36.880 --> 04:39:41.919
He had entrenched himself behind a table, sputtering out this volume of words

3247
04:39:41.919 --> 04:39:45.880
in a paroxysm of nervous excitements.
He felt as though every fiber of his

3248
04:39:47.000 --> 04:39:52.880
frame was ready to crack like an
overstrained cord. He got behind the table

3249
04:39:52.200 --> 04:39:56.720
because Vestova was standing before him at
the other side, now, his eyes

3250
04:39:56.840 --> 04:40:03.599
staringly white and bloodshot in his head, purple face his nostrils dilated, his

3251
04:40:03.720 --> 04:40:08.759
shoulders up, his fists clenched ready
as it seemed to spring upon him.

3252
04:40:10.000 --> 04:40:14.520
Vestova was waiting, as it appeared, till Van Mehern had spit out in

3253
04:40:14.639 --> 04:40:19.159
his face all the foul words he
could find. Yes, I hate you,

3254
04:40:19.759 --> 04:40:25.720
Bertie repeated, I hate you.
He could find nothing else to say.

3255
04:40:26.880 --> 04:40:32.200
Then Frank let himself go with a
bellow like a wild beast, a

3256
04:40:32.240 --> 04:40:36.599
sound that had nothing human in it. He sprang over the table, which

3257
04:40:36.639 --> 04:40:41.000
tilted on its side, and came
down with all the weight of his impetus

3258
04:40:41.040 --> 04:40:45.119
on Bertie, who fell under him
like a reed. He seized his foe

3259
04:40:45.200 --> 04:40:49.240
by the throat, dragged him over
the legs of the table into the middle

3260
04:40:49.279 --> 04:40:53.040
of the room, dropped him with
a crack on the floor, and fell

3261
04:40:53.119 --> 04:40:57.840
upon him. With his bony,
square knee on Bertie's chest and his left

3262
04:40:57.880 --> 04:41:03.599
hand holding his no like a vice, and a hard, dry feeling like

3263
04:41:03.639 --> 04:41:10.360
a thirst for sheer brutality rose to
Vestova's throat. With a dreadful smile on

3264
04:41:10.439 --> 04:41:15.200
his lips, he swallowed two or
three times, fiendishly, glad that he

3265
04:41:15.279 --> 04:41:18.520
had him in his power. In
the clutch of his left hand under his

3266
04:41:18.599 --> 04:41:23.959
knee, and he doubled his right
fist and raised it like a hammer with

3267
04:41:25.040 --> 04:41:33.520
a tigerish roar. There there there
he growled, And each time a sledgehammer

3268
04:41:33.560 --> 04:41:40.520
blow fell on Bertie there there there, on his nose, his eyes,

3269
04:41:40.759 --> 04:41:45.000
his mouth, his forehead, and
the blows resounded dully on his skull,

3270
04:41:45.279 --> 04:41:52.200
as if on metal. A red
mist clouded a vestover's sight. Everything was

3271
04:41:52.279 --> 04:41:57.279
red, purple, scarlet's vermilion,
a blood stained metally circled round him like

3272
04:41:57.360 --> 04:42:03.919
whirring wheels, and through that strange
crimson halo, a distorted face grinned up

3273
04:42:03.919 --> 04:42:08.919
at him under the pounding of his
fist. The corners of the room swam

3274
04:42:08.959 --> 04:42:14.840
in red, as if they were
full of tangible red terror, whirling whirling

3275
04:42:14.959 --> 04:42:19.639
round him, a purple dizziness,
a scarlet madness, a nightmare bathed in

3276
04:42:19.799 --> 04:42:29.240
blood. And his blows fell fast
and steadily there there there, and his

3277
04:42:29.400 --> 04:42:34.799
left hand closed tighter on the throat
below that face. The door flew open,

3278
04:42:36.240 --> 04:42:41.080
and she Eva rushed up to him
through the red mist, parting it,

3279
04:42:41.639 --> 04:42:47.119
dispelling it by the swift actuality of
her appearance. Frank, Frank,

3280
04:42:47.520 --> 04:42:52.200
She screamed, stop, I entreat
you, stop, you are murdering him.

3281
04:42:52.759 --> 04:42:56.080
He let his arm drop and looked
at her as in a dream.

3282
04:42:57.240 --> 04:43:02.200
She tried to drag him back,
to get him away from the battered body

3283
04:43:02.560 --> 04:43:06.959
to which he clung in his fury
like a vampire. Leave him, Frank,

3284
04:43:07.319 --> 04:43:11.040
I beseech you. Let him stand
up, Do not kill him.

3285
04:43:11.360 --> 04:43:15.080
I was outside and I was frightened. I did not understand because you were

3286
04:43:15.080 --> 04:43:18.479
speaking Dutch. Great heavens, what
have you done to him? Look?

3287
04:43:18.919 --> 04:43:23.520
Look what a state he is in. Frank had risen to his feet,

3288
04:43:25.080 --> 04:43:30.279
dazed by that red frenzy. He
had to lean on the table. I've

3289
04:43:30.279 --> 04:43:33.680
given him what he deserved. I've
thrashed him, and I will do it

3290
04:43:33.720 --> 04:43:37.439
again. He was on the point
of falling on the foe once more,

3291
04:43:37.840 --> 04:43:42.040
with that devilish grin on his face. And that's brutal thirst still choking him.

3292
04:43:44.279 --> 04:43:48.840
Frank. No, Frank, cried
Eva, clinging to him with both

3293
04:43:48.880 --> 04:43:52.799
hands. For God's sake, be
satisfied. Look at him, oh,

3294
04:43:52.880 --> 04:43:57.599
look at him? Well, Then
let him get up, Frank snarled.

3295
04:43:59.000 --> 04:44:03.639
He may get up, Get up, wretched once, get up. He

3296
04:44:03.720 --> 04:44:07.240
gave him a kick, and a
second and a third to make him rise,

3297
04:44:07.680 --> 04:44:11.279
but Van Meheron did not move.
Great God only look at him,

3298
04:44:11.720 --> 04:44:18.279
said Eva, kneeling down by the
body. Luke, don't you see She

3299
04:44:18.439 --> 04:44:22.759
turned to Frank, and he,
as if awaking from his dream of blood,

3300
04:44:22.119 --> 04:44:27.319
did see now, and soar with
horror. There it lay the legs

3301
04:44:27.360 --> 04:44:33.000
and arms, convulsed and writhing,
the body breathlessly still in the loose,

3302
04:44:33.159 --> 04:44:37.680
light hued summer suit, and the
face a mask of blue and green and

3303
04:44:37.880 --> 04:44:45.040
violet stained with purplish black, which
oozed from ears and nose and mouth,

3304
04:44:45.560 --> 04:44:52.799
trickling down clammy and dark, drop
by drop onto the carpet. One eye

3305
04:44:52.840 --> 04:44:56.720
was a shapeless mass, half pulp
and jelly. The other stared out of

3306
04:44:56.799 --> 04:45:03.759
the oval socket like a large,
dull, melancholy opal. The throat looked

3307
04:45:03.799 --> 04:45:07.680
as though it had a very broad
purple band round it, and as they

3308
04:45:07.759 --> 04:45:12.680
stood gazing down at the features,
it seemed that they were swelling, swelling

3309
04:45:12.840 --> 04:45:19.959
to a sickening, unrecognizable deformity.
Out of doors, the storm of rain

3310
04:45:21.080 --> 04:45:26.040
had not ceased. There they stood, staring at the horror that lay bleeding

3311
04:45:26.119 --> 04:45:30.599
and motionless on the ground before them, a leaden silence within and without the

3312
04:45:30.639 --> 04:45:38.240
falling torrent, an endless endless plash. Eva, kneeling by Bertie's side and

3313
04:45:38.279 --> 04:45:44.479
shuddering with terror, had felt his
heart. Had listened with her ear against

3314
04:45:44.479 --> 04:45:48.680
the breathless trunk, close to the
dreadful thing to make sure. As she

3315
04:45:48.720 --> 04:45:53.639
had got up again quaking, had
very softly stepped back from it, her

3316
04:45:53.680 --> 04:46:00.159
eyes still directed on it, and
now stood clinging against Frank as if she

3317
04:46:00.159 --> 04:46:04.479
would become one with him. In
her agony of fear Frank, she gasped,

3318
04:46:04.959 --> 04:46:10.279
God, have mercy, Frank,
he's dead. Let us go,

3319
04:46:10.720 --> 04:46:15.200
let us go, let us fly. Is he dead? Asked Vestova dully.

3320
04:46:17.319 --> 04:46:21.520
His mind was beginning to wake,
a faint dawn like murky daybreak.

3321
04:46:22.599 --> 04:46:27.639
He released himself from her grasp,
knelts down, listened, felt, thought

3322
04:46:27.799 --> 04:46:33.759
vaguely of fetching a doctor of remedies, and then he added, huskily,

3323
04:46:33.319 --> 04:46:37.240
certain indeed of what he said,
but quite uncertain of what he should do.

3324
04:46:38.040 --> 04:46:42.799
Yes, he's dead, he's dead. What can i Eva still hung

3325
04:46:42.840 --> 04:46:48.279
on to him, imploring him to
fly, to escape, but his mind

3326
04:46:48.400 --> 04:46:53.720
was gradually getting clearer, daylight shining
in on his bewilderments. He freed himself

3327
04:46:53.720 --> 04:46:59.119
from her embrace and tried to go
his hand was already on the door handle.

3328
04:47:00.759 --> 04:47:03.560
Frank, She shrieked, for she
saw that he meant to abandon her.

3329
04:47:04.319 --> 04:47:08.159
Hush, he whispered, with a
finger on his lips. Stay here,

3330
04:47:08.720 --> 04:47:12.240
stay here and watch him. I
will come back, and he went.

3331
04:47:14.560 --> 04:47:17.759
She would have followed him, have
clung to him in an agony of

3332
04:47:17.880 --> 04:47:22.080
terror, but he had already shut
the door behind him, and her trembling

3333
04:47:22.119 --> 04:47:27.080
knees could scarcely carry her. She
sat down by the body, shivering miserably.

3334
04:47:29.159 --> 04:47:33.799
There it was, the swollen,
bruised and purple face, sad and

3335
04:47:33.880 --> 04:47:37.919
sickening in the diffused afternoon light which
came in obliquely through the curtain of rain,

3336
04:47:40.080 --> 04:47:44.279
every breath stuck in her throat.
She was dying for air, and

3337
04:47:44.360 --> 04:47:48.360
long to open the window, being
closer to that than to the door,

3338
04:47:48.439 --> 04:47:55.080
but she dared not. But outside, through the dim square panes, she

3339
04:47:55.119 --> 04:48:00.319
saw the tragical sky covered with driving
slate colored piles of cloud, and the

3340
04:48:00.439 --> 04:48:06.919
rain falling in a perfect deluge,
and the sea dark and ominous as an

3341
04:48:06.959 --> 04:48:12.680
imminent threat, the raging foam gleaming
through a shroud of pouring water. Mulder

3342
04:48:14.159 --> 04:48:19.040
moulder, she exclaimed, icy cold, with terrible remembrance. It is the

3343
04:48:19.080 --> 04:48:25.119
sky of Moulder, the fjord of
Mulder, that was where I first felt

3344
04:48:25.159 --> 04:48:30.119
it. Oh God, help help, And she fell senseless on the floor.

3345
04:48:33.439 --> 04:48:45.119
End of section eight Section nine of
Footsteps of Fate by Louis Uberus.

3346
04:48:45.439 --> 04:48:53.959
This libertyvox recording is in the public
domain. Part five one. Since that

3347
04:48:55.080 --> 04:48:59.799
day of terror, two years had
elapsed, years of silence, endurance for

3348
04:48:59.840 --> 04:49:04.520
them, both each suffering alone,
for they were parted with only the solace

3349
04:49:04.560 --> 04:49:07.759
of a brief meeting now and then, when she could go and see him

3350
04:49:07.840 --> 04:49:12.799
where he was spending those two years, the days slowly dragging past in the

3351
04:49:12.840 --> 04:49:18.599
prison among the sand hills. He
had given himself up at once to the

3352
04:49:18.639 --> 04:49:22.159
police of Scheveningen, as if he
were walking in his sleep, had been

3353
04:49:22.200 --> 04:49:27.000
taken to the house of detention.
He had stood his trial. It had

3354
04:49:27.080 --> 04:49:32.759
lasted six weeks, a short time, his lawyer had said to comfort him,

3355
04:49:33.080 --> 04:49:37.200
because there was no mystery to clear
up. The murder was proved to

3356
04:49:37.240 --> 04:49:41.119
a demonstration beyond the shadow of a
doubt, to be the result of a

3357
04:49:41.200 --> 04:49:45.279
quarrel. This was evident also from
the evidence of miss Rhodes, who had

3358
04:49:45.319 --> 04:49:51.360
stated that the criminal himself had not
at first understood that his friend was dead,

3359
04:49:51.720 --> 04:49:55.639
for that he had immediately after kicked
him two or three times to rouse

3360
04:49:55.720 --> 04:49:59.520
him, thinking he was only in
a state of collapse, and that this

3361
04:49:59.599 --> 04:50:03.439
had taken and place in her presence. The trial was watched with interest by

3362
04:50:03.479 --> 04:50:07.759
the public, and their sympathy was
aroused when the purchase of the letters came

3363
04:50:07.799 --> 04:50:12.560
out through the evidence of Sir Archibald
and his daughter, confirmed by William,

3364
04:50:12.680 --> 04:50:19.639
whose presence was secured by diplomatic interference, there were no difficulties. Six weeks

3365
04:50:19.680 --> 04:50:26.520
settled everything. Frank was sentenced to
two years imprisonment and the case was not

3366
04:50:26.560 --> 04:50:32.159
taken to a higher court. He
had spent the time, day after day

3367
04:50:32.439 --> 04:50:37.959
in a waking dream of gloomy lucidity, with always always the sinister vision of

3368
04:50:37.000 --> 04:50:41.919
that writhing body and the horror of
that dreadful, battered face before his eyes.

3369
04:50:44.080 --> 04:50:47.639
He had felt its glide over the
pages of his book when he tried

3370
04:50:47.680 --> 04:50:52.639
to read among the letters he traced
when he tried to write what he scarcely

3371
04:50:52.720 --> 04:50:57.400
knew fragments of an account of his
travels through America and Australia. A melancholy

3372
04:50:57.439 --> 04:51:03.119
employment and full of pain, since
every word reminded him of the murdered man

3373
04:51:03.159 --> 04:51:07.599
who had been his constant companion.
And when he did nothing but gazed in

3374
04:51:07.680 --> 04:51:12.400
dreary reverie out of the window of
his cell, there just below and not

3375
04:51:12.639 --> 04:51:17.479
very far away, he could see
the villa where they had dwelt together and

3376
04:51:17.560 --> 04:51:19.720
where he had done the deed,
with a glimmer of the sea, a

3377
04:51:19.759 --> 04:51:26.319
shining gray streak, and in fancy
he could smell the briny scent, as

3378
04:51:26.319 --> 04:51:30.319
in the days when he had spent
hour after hour with his feet on the

3379
04:51:30.360 --> 04:51:33.840
balustrade, the hours which, as
they crept on, though he knew it's

3380
04:51:33.880 --> 04:51:41.080
not, were bringing inevitable doom on
them both every moments nearer. So it's

3381
04:51:41.119 --> 04:51:48.000
never left him, It's haunted him
incessantly. Heava had entreated her father to

3382
04:51:48.040 --> 04:51:53.400
remain at the Hague during all this
terrible time, and Sir Archibald had consented,

3383
04:51:53.799 --> 04:52:00.680
fearing for his daughter's health. Her
natural sweet equanimity had given way to

3384
04:52:00.759 --> 04:52:06.680
a fitful nervousness, which tormented her
with hallucinations, visions of thunder and of

3385
04:52:06.759 --> 04:52:11.959
blood. So they had settled in
the van Storck Park, and all through

3386
04:52:11.000 --> 04:52:15.520
Frank's imprisonment she had been able to
see him from time to time, coming

3387
04:52:15.599 --> 04:52:21.880
home more exhausted from each visit,
in despair over his melancholy. However,

3388
04:52:21.919 --> 04:52:25.680
she might try to encourage him with
hopes for the future. Later on,

3389
04:52:25.880 --> 04:52:30.159
when he should be free, she
herself could hope, nay, lived only

3390
04:52:30.200 --> 04:52:36.840
on hope, controlling her excitability under
the yoke of patience and of her confidence

3391
04:52:36.919 --> 04:52:41.000
in something brighter which might come into
her life by and by when Frank was

3392
04:52:41.080 --> 04:52:47.680
free, a new life, oh
for a new life, and her spirit

3393
04:52:47.840 --> 04:52:53.560
stanced at the thought and new happiness, Great God, some happiness. She

3394
04:52:53.599 --> 04:52:57.840
did not herself understand how she could
still hope, since she had known so

3395
04:52:59.000 --> 04:53:03.200
much of life and of men,
and since she had lived through that fearful

3396
04:53:03.279 --> 04:53:07.360
experience. But she would not think
of it, and in the distant future

3397
04:53:07.560 --> 04:53:15.119
she saw everything fair and good.
Even her hallucinations did not destroy her hopefulness,

3398
04:53:15.599 --> 04:53:18.840
though dreading them she regarded them as
a recurring malady of the brain,

3399
04:53:19.119 --> 04:53:25.720
which would presently depart of itself.
She could even smile as she sat streaming

3400
04:53:25.799 --> 04:53:30.080
in the pale light of a starlit
summer evening, the calendar in her hand,

3401
04:53:30.279 --> 04:53:33.360
on which she scratched through each day
as it died with a gold pencil

3402
04:53:33.439 --> 04:53:38.200
case which she had bought on purpose
and used for nothing else. Wearing it

3403
04:53:38.279 --> 04:53:44.759
in a bracelet, struck it out
with a glad, firm stroke as bringing

3404
04:53:44.799 --> 04:53:48.639
her nearer to the blissful future.
And she would even let the days pass

3405
04:53:48.720 --> 04:53:52.639
without erasing them severally, that she
might have the joy at the end of

3406
04:53:52.680 --> 04:53:59.119
a week of making six or seven
strokes, one after another in a luxury

3407
04:53:59.159 --> 04:54:07.880
of anticipation. Two and now long
as they had been, the days had

3408
04:54:07.919 --> 04:54:14.040
all stolen by all, one after
another. Beyond recall, the past was

3409
04:54:14.080 --> 04:54:18.680
more and more the past, and
would forever remain so it would never come

3410
04:54:18.720 --> 04:54:22.799
back to them, she thought,
never haunt them more with hideous memories.

3411
04:54:22.959 --> 04:54:29.159
She grew calmer, her nervousness diminished, and something like peace came upon her

3412
04:54:29.560 --> 04:54:33.400
in a passionate longing for the happy
future, for she was going to be

3413
04:54:33.520 --> 04:54:37.680
happy with Frank. She was now
in London again with her father, living

3414
04:54:37.799 --> 04:54:44.759
very quietly, still feeling the past
in spite of her present gladness, still

3415
04:54:44.799 --> 04:54:49.119
conscious of what had been in all
its misery and its horror. Frank too

3416
04:54:49.279 --> 04:54:53.360
was in London, in a poorly
paid place as an assistant overseer, in

3417
04:54:53.439 --> 04:54:57.759
some engineering works, the only opening
he could find by the help of his

3418
04:54:57.840 --> 04:55:04.279
old connections, jumping at it.
Indeed, in consideration of his antecedents,

3419
04:55:04.319 --> 04:55:08.240
of which he had no cause to
be proud by and by, he should

3420
04:55:08.279 --> 04:55:12.919
get something better, something more suited
to his attainments. And he took up

3421
04:55:12.959 --> 04:55:18.919
his studies again to refresh his technical
knowledge, which had grown somewhat rusty.

3422
04:55:19.000 --> 04:55:25.200
So Archibald had grown much older and
was crippled by attacks of rheumatism, but

3423
04:55:25.319 --> 04:55:30.360
he still sat poring over his heraldic
studies, living in Holland for his daughter's

3424
04:55:30.400 --> 04:55:34.360
sake. He had too long been
out of his own circle of acquaintance and

3425
04:55:34.520 --> 04:55:38.400
groove of habits. And though he
had, from time to time, in

3426
04:55:38.439 --> 04:55:44.240
a fit of childish temper, expressed
his vexation at Eva's becoming the wife of

3427
04:55:44.279 --> 04:55:48.360
a murderer, he now agreed to
everything, shrinking from the world and troubling

3428
04:55:48.479 --> 04:55:53.840
himself about nothing, only craving to
be left undisturbed in the apathy of his

3429
04:55:53.959 --> 04:56:00.360
old age. He knew nothing about
it, old men, nothing thing of

3430
04:56:00.439 --> 04:56:04.479
such things. The young people might
please themselves. They always knew best,

3431
04:56:04.520 --> 04:56:11.479
and must have their own way.
So he grumbled on apparently indifferent, but

3432
04:56:11.720 --> 04:56:15.400
glad at heart that Eva should marry
Frank, since Frank, if he could

3433
04:56:15.439 --> 04:56:19.799
be violent, was good at heart, and Eva would be well cared for,

3434
04:56:21.279 --> 04:56:25.040
and he himself would have someone to
bear him company in his own house.

3435
04:56:25.720 --> 04:56:32.080
Yes, yes, a little company. Frank and Eva met but rarely

3436
04:56:32.200 --> 04:56:36.119
during the week, for he was
busy in the evenings. But they saw

3437
04:56:36.159 --> 04:56:40.400
each other regularly on Sundays, and
Eva had the whole week in which to

3438
04:56:40.439 --> 04:56:44.080
think over the Sunday which he had
last seen him, and she tried to

3439
04:56:44.119 --> 04:56:48.000
recall every word that he had said, every look that he had given her.

3440
04:56:48.680 --> 04:56:52.240
On these treasures she lived all the
week. She had never loved him

3441
04:56:52.279 --> 04:56:57.000
so dearly as now, when crushing
depression weighed on him, which he longed

3442
04:56:57.040 --> 04:57:02.560
to lighten by the solace of her
love. There was something motherly in her

3443
04:57:02.560 --> 04:57:06.200
feeling for him, as though his
sufferings had made a child of him,

3444
04:57:06.720 --> 04:57:11.479
needing a tenderer regard than of yore. She had loved him then for the

3445
04:57:11.520 --> 04:57:15.680
mysterious charm, as it seemed to
her of the contrast between his feeble gentleness

3446
04:57:15.680 --> 04:57:22.040
and his powerful physique, And now
it was no more than a higher development

3447
04:57:22.159 --> 04:57:26.520
of the same charm, since she
saw the stalwart strong man suffering so pitiably

3448
04:57:26.880 --> 04:57:30.639
under the memory of what he had
gone through, and lacking the energy to

3449
04:57:30.759 --> 04:57:37.159
rise superior to it and to begin
life anew. But this want of vigor

3450
04:57:37.200 --> 04:57:41.880
did not discourage her in her hopes
for the future. On the contrary,

3451
04:57:41.360 --> 04:57:47.599
she loved him for his weakness,
while regarding this as singular and incomprehensible in

3452
04:57:47.639 --> 04:57:52.720
herself, dreaming it over in her
solitude, or smiling with gladness, for

3453
04:57:52.840 --> 04:57:57.479
she, as a woman, in
spite of her nervous visionary temperament, could

3454
04:57:57.560 --> 04:58:03.720
resolutely forget the power as bravely go
forward and meet the future, compelling happiness

3455
04:58:03.759 --> 04:58:10.080
to come to her by her sweet
patience and elastic constancy. Had not all

3456
04:58:10.159 --> 04:58:15.159
the woes of the past lain outside
them both, had not Frank done penance

3457
04:58:15.319 --> 04:58:18.759
enough for his fit of rage to
hold up his head again. Now,

3458
04:58:18.919 --> 04:58:23.040
Oh, they would soon have got
over it completely. They would insist on

3459
04:58:23.159 --> 04:58:29.959
being happy, and she would cure
him of everything like heart sickness. Thus

3460
04:58:30.080 --> 04:58:34.639
she hoped on a long long time, refusing at first to acknowledge that he

3461
04:58:34.680 --> 04:58:41.880
grew more melancholy and gloomy, sinking
into deeper and deeper dejection under his burden.

3462
04:58:41.919 --> 04:58:45.880
But at last she was compelled to
see it, could no longer blind

3463
04:58:45.919 --> 04:58:52.639
herself. She could not help seeing
that he sat speechless when she talked,

3464
04:58:52.680 --> 04:58:57.880
so hopefully listened in silence to her
cheerful words and bright illusions, saying nothing

3465
04:58:59.360 --> 04:59:03.959
and sometimes closing his eyes with a
sigh which he tried to suppress. She

3466
04:59:03.959 --> 04:59:10.479
could not deceive herself. Her sanguine
moods aroused in him only an echo of

3467
04:59:10.520 --> 04:59:15.279
despair. And when one day this
was suddenly clear to her, she felt

3468
04:59:15.479 --> 04:59:21.560
suddenly too that her nervous fears had
worn her out, that she was sad

3469
04:59:21.560 --> 04:59:26.080
and ill, that her courage,
her hopes, her illusions were sinking down

3470
04:59:26.639 --> 04:59:32.080
down, deeper and deeper. Her
bitterness, as of wormwood, rose up

3471
04:59:32.080 --> 04:59:37.119
in her, tainting everything. She
flung herself on her bed in her loneliness,

3472
04:59:37.639 --> 04:59:44.119
hearts broken, in utter anguish,
and cursed her life, cursed God

3473
04:59:44.439 --> 04:59:52.639
in helpless woe. Three then circumstances
occurred, which, in spite of all

3474
04:59:52.680 --> 04:59:56.159
this, led to its being settled
that they were to be married in quite

3475
04:59:56.200 --> 05:00:02.520
a short time. In about six
weeks, Frank had been helped by some

3476
05:00:02.599 --> 05:00:07.360
of his old friends to obtain an
appointment as an engineer in a great Glasgow

3477
05:00:07.439 --> 05:00:11.520
firm. Eva was to have her
mother's fortune. There were no difficulties in

3478
05:00:11.560 --> 05:00:17.919
the way. Frank now always spent
the whole of Sunday at Sir Archibald's house.

3479
05:00:18.040 --> 05:00:22.159
He came to lunch sitting as silent
as ever, and after lunch they

3480
05:00:22.159 --> 05:00:29.040
were usually left to themselves. At
first, the hours flew by, sped

3481
05:00:29.080 --> 05:00:33.439
by Eva's daydreams. Though she was
still and in spite of herself somewhat nervous.

3482
05:00:34.080 --> 05:00:40.040
They would discuss various matters and even
readtogether. But then for some little

3483
05:00:40.080 --> 05:00:45.520
time, minutes would link itself to
minute while they did nothing but sit side

3484
05:00:45.520 --> 05:00:49.799
by side on a deep sofa,
holding each other's hands and gazing into vacancy.

3485
05:00:51.880 --> 05:00:55.799
And a moment came when they could
no longer endure that grasp, no

3486
05:00:55.880 --> 05:01:00.439
longer dared, the image of Bertie
with his purpose old, blood stained face

3487
05:01:00.919 --> 05:01:07.520
would rise up between them. Their
hands parted. They were both thinking of

3488
05:01:07.599 --> 05:01:11.119
the dead. Eva felt as if
she had been an accomplice in the deed.

3489
05:01:12.200 --> 05:01:18.639
As it grew darker, intolerable misery
would so overpower her that it seemed

3490
05:01:18.680 --> 05:01:22.159
as though she must suffocate. Then
they would throw the windows open, and

3491
05:01:22.279 --> 05:01:27.720
stand for a long long time to
refresh themselves in the cool air, looking

3492
05:01:27.759 --> 05:01:33.080
out over the park in the gathering
gloom. She listened in dread to Frank's

3493
05:01:33.080 --> 05:01:37.959
breath as it came and went hi. And she was afraid of him in

3494
05:01:38.040 --> 05:01:44.000
spite of her love. After all, he had committed murder. He could

3495
05:01:44.000 --> 05:01:48.560
do such things in his rage.
Oh if in a fit of passion she

3496
05:01:48.759 --> 05:01:52.279
too, But she would defend herself
with the strength of despair, she would

3497
05:01:52.279 --> 05:01:59.159
cling to life. Had she not
herself felt strong enough to kill. No,

3498
05:01:59.159 --> 05:02:03.560
No, no, she surely she
was too timid. And besides,

3499
05:02:03.840 --> 05:02:07.720
she loved him so dearly, she
adored him, and soon she would be

3500
05:02:07.799 --> 05:02:12.799
his wife. Still she was afraid. The Sundays were no longer days so

3501
05:02:12.880 --> 05:02:17.799
sweet as to leave a treasure of
memory in which she could live through the

3502
05:02:17.840 --> 05:02:22.520
week. On the contrary, even
now dreaded Sunday, she awaited it with

3503
05:02:22.680 --> 05:02:29.479
terror. Friday, Saturday. Here
it was again. There was Frank.

3504
05:02:30.000 --> 05:02:34.200
She heard his step as still she
was afraid, and she still loved him.

3505
05:02:36.560 --> 05:02:41.200
They were sitting thus one evening,
hand in hand and silence. It

3506
05:02:41.360 --> 05:02:45.880
was still early in the afternoon,
but a storm threatened and the gray gloom

3507
05:02:45.000 --> 05:02:51.560
peered in through the thick lace curtains. Eva, depressed by the heavy weather,

3508
05:02:52.040 --> 05:02:56.639
thirsting for some comfort, suddenly,
in spite of her fears, threw

3509
05:02:56.680 --> 05:03:02.479
herself on Frank's breast. I could
not longer endure this weather, she wailed,

3510
05:03:02.759 --> 05:03:07.040
almost moaning, the dark, cloudy
sky always oppresses me. Of late,

3511
05:03:07.479 --> 05:03:11.720
I want to go to Italy.
Frank, to the sun, the

3512
05:03:11.759 --> 05:03:15.919
sun. He pressed her to him, but did not speak. She began

3513
05:03:15.959 --> 05:03:22.240
to weep softly, Say something,
Frank, She sobbed. Yes, I

3514
05:03:22.319 --> 05:03:26.959
do not like this heavy sky,
he said dully. Again, there was

3515
05:03:27.000 --> 05:03:32.759
silence. She tried to control herself, clinging closely to him. Then she

3516
05:03:32.840 --> 05:03:37.959
went on, I cannot be up
against it. I believe since that rainy

3517
05:03:37.000 --> 05:03:41.560
day which overtook us in Mulder so
long ago, now five years and more.

3518
05:03:41.639 --> 05:03:47.000
You remember when we had met three
or four times a few days before

3519
05:03:47.040 --> 05:03:52.159
at Doroncim. She smiled and kissed
his hand, remembering her youth. She

3520
05:03:52.319 --> 05:03:57.159
was old. Now you recollect.
We got home to the hotel drenched.

3521
05:03:57.840 --> 05:04:02.840
I believe I have been well ever
since that day that I took a bad

3522
05:04:02.919 --> 05:04:06.520
cold which settled in me, though
at first I did not feel it and

3523
05:04:06.560 --> 05:04:11.319
said nothing about it, but which
has been undermining me ever since, all

3524
05:04:11.400 --> 05:04:15.959
this long time. He made no
reply. He too had a vague recollection

3525
05:04:17.080 --> 05:04:21.279
of something tragically painful at Smulda,
but he could no longer remember what.

3526
05:04:22.639 --> 05:04:26.520
But she suddenly burst into a violent
fit of weeping. Oh, Frank,

3527
05:04:26.880 --> 05:04:33.799
speak say something, She besought him, in despair at his silence, feeling

3528
05:04:33.840 --> 05:04:38.400
her terror grow greater in the stillness
and her heart throbbing wildly in spite of

3529
05:04:38.439 --> 05:04:45.400
herself. He passed his hands over
his forehead, trying to collect his thoughts.

3530
05:04:45.840 --> 05:04:51.680
Then he slowly replied, Yes,
Eva, for I have something to

3531
05:04:51.720 --> 05:04:56.959
say to you, just this very
day. What is that? She asked,

3532
05:04:56.439 --> 05:05:02.639
looking up through her tears in surprise
at strange tone. I want to

3533
05:05:02.680 --> 05:05:07.840
speak to you very seriously, Eva, Will you listen? Yes, I

3534
05:05:07.919 --> 05:05:11.520
want to ask you something to ask
if you would not rather be free to

3535
05:05:11.639 --> 05:05:15.959
ask, if you would not be
glad that I should release you. She

3536
05:05:17.080 --> 05:05:21.919
did not immediately understand him, and
sat gazing at him, open mouthed.

3537
05:05:22.119 --> 05:05:27.200
Why, she said at length,
shuddering, terrified, lest he should understand

3538
05:05:27.360 --> 05:05:32.959
something of what was torturing her soul, because it would be so much better

3539
05:05:33.000 --> 05:05:37.840
for you my child, he said
gently. I have no right to fetter

3540
05:05:37.919 --> 05:05:41.360
your life to mine. I am
wrecked an old man, and you are

3541
05:05:41.400 --> 05:05:48.000
young. She clung closely to him. No, I am old too,

3542
05:05:48.599 --> 05:05:52.119
said she with a smile, and
I will not have it. I will

3543
05:05:52.159 --> 05:05:55.479
be true to you. I will
always comfort you when you are out of

3544
05:05:55.560 --> 05:06:00.560
heart, and so together we will
both grow young again and both be happy.

3545
05:06:00.560 --> 05:06:04.360
Her voice was as sweet as balm. To give him strength. She

3546
05:06:04.479 --> 05:06:10.159
felt something of her old illusions reviving
in her. She would cling to him

3547
05:06:10.200 --> 05:06:15.720
whatever the cost. She loved him. He clasped her tightly to his breast

3548
05:06:15.200 --> 05:06:21.080
and kissed her fondly. For the
moment, she felt no fear. He

3549
05:06:21.159 --> 05:06:26.560
was so unhappy. You are a
dear good girl, he whispered in a

3550
05:06:26.639 --> 05:06:30.880
husky, trembling voice. I do
not deserve that you should be so good

3551
05:06:30.919 --> 05:06:36.000
to me. But seriously, Eva, think it over once more. Consider

3552
05:06:36.080 --> 05:06:40.560
again whether you would not be unhappy, nay wretched, if you had to

3553
05:06:40.599 --> 05:06:45.479
be with me always. There is
yet time. We have our future lives

3554
05:06:45.479 --> 05:06:48.680
in our hands, and I cannot
spend mine with you, Eva, only

3555
05:06:48.759 --> 05:06:53.560
to make yours more miserable than I
have done already. So for your sake

3556
05:06:53.880 --> 05:06:59.560
for your happiness. I would gladly
give you back your word, but I

3557
05:06:59.599 --> 05:07:03.840
will not have it, she moaned
desperately. I will not. I do

3558
05:07:03.959 --> 05:07:07.639
not understand you. Why should you
give me back my word? He took

3559
05:07:07.720 --> 05:07:11.840
her hands caressingly in his own and
looked in her face a long time,

3560
05:07:12.319 --> 05:07:18.799
with a sad smile under the gold
colored mustache. Why because because you are

3561
05:07:18.840 --> 05:07:23.959
afraid of me, my darling.
A spasm shot through her whole frame like

3562
05:07:25.000 --> 05:07:32.040
an electric shock. Wildly, she
looked at him and wildly protested, It's

3563
05:07:32.119 --> 05:07:36.720
not true, Frank, I swear
it's not true. Great God, why

3564
05:07:36.759 --> 05:07:38.759
do you think that? What have
I done to make you think it?

3565
05:07:40.319 --> 05:07:44.040
Believe me, Frank, take my
word. I swear to you by all

3566
05:07:44.119 --> 05:07:48.159
that is holy there, I swear
to you it is not true. I

3567
05:07:48.240 --> 05:07:52.560
am not afraid of you. Yes, yes, Eva, you are afraid

3568
05:07:52.599 --> 05:07:56.919
of me, he said, calmly. And I understand it. It must

3569
05:07:56.919 --> 05:08:00.959
be so. And yet I assure
you you should have no cause to be,

3570
05:08:00.400 --> 05:08:03.360
for I should be a lamb in
your hands. I would lay my

3571
05:08:03.479 --> 05:08:07.680
head in your hands, your pretty
cold white hands, and sleep like a

3572
05:08:07.799 --> 05:08:11.799
child. You should do with me
whatever you would, and I would never

3573
05:08:11.840 --> 05:08:15.880
be angry with you, for I
could never be so again. Never again,

3574
05:08:17.759 --> 05:08:19.880
I would lie at your feet,
I would feel your feet on me

3575
05:08:21.439 --> 05:08:26.040
on my breast, and lies so
still, so calm and blessed. He

3576
05:08:26.080 --> 05:08:30.639
had fallen on his knees before her, with his head in her lap,

3577
05:08:30.040 --> 05:08:34.680
on her hands. Well, then, she said, gently, if that

3578
05:08:34.880 --> 05:08:38.400
is the case, why should I
ever be afraid of you? Since you

3579
05:08:38.479 --> 05:08:42.479
promised me this? And why do
you talk of releasing me from my word?

3580
05:08:44.400 --> 05:08:48.880
Because I cannot bear to live on
seeing you so unhappy? Because you

3581
05:08:48.959 --> 05:08:52.279
are unhappy with me, as I
can see, and because you will be

3582
05:08:52.319 --> 05:08:57.599
even more so when we are together
later Always, she quivered in every fiber,

3583
05:08:59.240 --> 05:09:03.520
A strange li ucidity came over her. She saw all that had happened

3584
05:09:03.680 --> 05:09:07.240
as if mirrored in crystal. Hear
me, frank, she said, in

3585
05:09:07.279 --> 05:09:11.959
a clear, bright voice, Remain
where you are and listen to me.

3586
05:09:11.319 --> 05:09:15.200
Listen well. I mean to be
true to you, and we shall be

3587
05:09:15.279 --> 05:09:19.599
happy. I feel that we shall. What has occurred that we should always

3588
05:09:19.639 --> 05:09:25.159
be so miserable? Nothing, I
repeat it, nothing. Do not let

3589
05:09:25.240 --> 05:09:30.360
us spoil our own lives. I
doubted you once you have forgiven me.

3590
05:09:30.919 --> 05:09:33.720
That is all. At an end
you discovered that Bertie was a scoundrel,

3591
05:09:33.799 --> 05:09:37.880
and you killed him. That too
is ended. Nothing of all this can

3592
05:09:37.919 --> 05:09:41.279
matter to me now. I will
never think of it again. It has

3593
05:09:41.319 --> 05:09:45.959
ceased to exist so far as I
am concerned. And that is all,

3594
05:09:45.000 --> 05:09:51.479
Frank. Consider reflect, that is
all. Nothing else has happened, and

3595
05:09:51.560 --> 05:09:56.119
that is not much. We are
young and strong, we are not really

3596
05:09:56.159 --> 05:09:59.720
old. And I tell you we
can live a new life somewhere together,

3597
05:10:00.360 --> 05:10:03.759
somewhere a long way from London,
A new life, Frank, a new

3598
05:10:03.840 --> 05:10:08.240
life. I love you, Frank. You are everything to me. You

3599
05:10:08.319 --> 05:10:14.279
are my idol, my husband,
my darling, my child, my great

3600
05:10:14.439 --> 05:10:19.080
child. She clasped his head passionately
to her bosom in a rapture, her

3601
05:10:19.080 --> 05:10:25.959
eyes sparkling and a flush tinging the
azalea whiteness of her cheeks. But his

3602
05:10:26.080 --> 05:10:30.840
eyes met hers with a look of
anguish. You are an angel, Eva,

3603
05:10:30.200 --> 05:10:36.119
you are an angel. But I
cannot claim you for Listen to me

3604
05:10:36.919 --> 05:10:41.400
the real truth. Well, what
is the truth? Bertie was not a

3605
05:10:41.479 --> 05:10:45.680
scoundrel. He was nothing but a
man, a very weak man. That

3606
05:10:45.959 --> 05:10:51.240
is the truth. Listen to me, Eva, let me speak. I

3607
05:10:51.319 --> 05:10:55.319
thought a great deal at Scheveningen,
among the sand hills. You know,

3608
05:10:56.520 --> 05:10:59.560
I thought over everything I could remember
of what he had said to me in

3609
05:10:59.599 --> 05:11:04.360
those liveslast moments in self defense,
and by degrees all his words came back

3610
05:11:04.400 --> 05:11:08.360
to me, and I felt that
he had been in the right, in

3611
05:11:08.439 --> 05:11:12.000
the right. Oh, Frank,
I do not know what he said in

3612
05:11:12.080 --> 05:11:18.840
self defense. But now still shall
Bertie's influence come between us to part us?

3613
05:11:18.319 --> 05:11:22.680
She cried in bitter despair. No
it is not, that, he

3614
05:11:22.720 --> 05:11:27.040
replied, Make no mistake. It
is not Bertie's influence which divides us.

3615
05:11:27.439 --> 05:11:33.159
It is my guilt, your guilt, My guilt which rises up before me

3616
05:11:33.200 --> 05:11:37.000
from time to time, reminding me
of what I have done, so that

3617
05:11:37.080 --> 05:11:41.840
I cannot forget it, shall never
forget it. Let me tell you he

3618
05:11:41.959 --> 05:11:45.400
was right in what he said at
last. He was a weak creature,

3619
05:11:45.599 --> 05:11:51.400
he said, flung into life without
any strength of will. Was that his

3620
05:11:51.520 --> 05:11:56.080
fault? He despised himself for having
done so mean a thing about those letters,

3621
05:11:56.400 --> 05:11:59.599
but he had not known what else
to do. Well, And I

3622
05:11:59.639 --> 05:12:03.479
forgive him for being weak, for
he could not help it. And we

3623
05:12:03.520 --> 05:12:07.880
are all weak. I am weak
too. But you would never have done

3624
05:12:07.959 --> 05:12:12.159
such a thing, cried Eva,
because I perhaps some difference, But I

3625
05:12:12.200 --> 05:12:15.840
am weak all the same. I
am weak when I am angry, and

3626
05:12:15.880 --> 05:12:21.319
then then in my fury, I
was utterly, utterly weak. This is

3627
05:12:21.360 --> 05:12:25.799
the truth. This is what is
crushing me and broken as I am.

3628
05:12:26.279 --> 05:12:30.279
I cannot be your husband. Oh
what would I not give to have him

3629
05:12:30.319 --> 05:12:33.840
still alive. I was fond of
him once, and now I could say

3630
05:12:33.840 --> 05:12:38.599
to him that I do understand that
I forgive him. Frank, do not

3631
05:12:38.759 --> 05:12:45.240
be so foolish, so foolishly good, she exclaimed. Oh it is not

3632
05:12:45.479 --> 05:12:49.159
foolish goodness, he said, with
a melancholy smile. It is philosophy.

3633
05:12:51.279 --> 05:12:53.560
Well, then, she cried,
in a hard, rough tone, I

3634
05:12:53.599 --> 05:12:59.080
am no philosopher. I am not
foolishly good. I do not forgive him

3635
05:12:59.080 --> 05:13:03.919
for being a villain and for making
us miserable. I hate him, hate

3636
05:13:03.959 --> 05:13:07.360
him dead as he is. I
hate him for coming between us and haunting

3637
05:13:07.439 --> 05:13:11.639
us now that you have killed him, and for the diabolical influence he still

3638
05:13:11.680 --> 05:13:15.840
brings to bear on you and on
me. But I say I will not

3639
05:13:17.080 --> 05:13:22.639
have it, She shrieked, despairingly, starting to her feet, but still

3640
05:13:22.639 --> 05:13:26.720
clinging to him. I tell you
that I will not lose you for the

3641
05:13:26.799 --> 05:13:30.880
second time. I swear that if
you try to leave me here, I

3642
05:13:30.919 --> 05:13:34.279
will stand, holding you fast in
my arms, clasping you to me till

3643
05:13:34.319 --> 05:13:38.479
we both are dead, for I
will not let impart us. I hate

3644
05:13:38.560 --> 05:13:42.360
him. I am glad you murdered
him, and if he were living now,

3645
05:13:42.720 --> 05:13:47.680
I would do it myself. I
would kill him, strangle him,

3646
05:13:47.840 --> 05:13:52.279
strangle him. She clenched her hands
as if she gripped his throat, and

3647
05:13:52.400 --> 05:13:57.720
held Frank in her embrace as though
he were her prey. Out of doors,

3648
05:13:57.799 --> 05:14:03.520
it was growing darker every minute.
He gently released himself, supporting her

3649
05:14:03.639 --> 05:14:08.159
indeed, for he felt that she
was tottering in her overtension of energy and

3650
05:14:08.240 --> 05:14:14.319
courage. She was staring out at
the weather with her sunken gray eyes,

3651
05:14:14.759 --> 05:14:18.159
and she shivered from head to foot. He led her back to the sofa,

3652
05:14:18.639 --> 05:14:22.880
made her sit down, and again
knelt before her in more passionate devotion

3653
05:14:23.040 --> 05:14:30.159
than ever eva. He whispered,
Oh, look at the clouds, She

3654
05:14:30.240 --> 05:14:34.639
cried, It is pouring a deluge, Yes, said he, What does

3655
05:14:34.680 --> 05:14:40.439
that matter? I love you.
I cannot bear up against such weather.

3656
05:14:40.880 --> 05:14:45.919
She moaned. It oppresses me and
frightens me. Oh, it terrifies me.

3657
05:14:45.080 --> 05:14:51.680
So protect me, Frank, shelter
me. Come close. She drew

3658
05:14:51.759 --> 05:14:56.479
him to her on the sofa,
and, opening his coat, nestled against

3659
05:14:56.560 --> 05:15:02.080
him. I have so frightened.
Hold me tightly, wrap your coat round

3660
05:15:02.119 --> 05:15:04.240
me. Oh, do not let
it come upon me. Lord, have

3661
05:15:04.360 --> 05:15:08.479
mercy, and do not let it
come over me again. I beseech thee.

3662
05:15:10.599 --> 05:15:14.240
It was the visionary thunder. She
prayed to be spared, and she

3663
05:15:14.360 --> 05:15:18.240
threw both arms round her lover,
clinging to him as if to hide herself.

3664
05:15:19.400 --> 05:15:26.119
So she remained while he held her
close. When presently twisting her fingers

3665
05:15:26.159 --> 05:15:30.599
into his waistcoat pocket, she murmured, what is this? What have you

3666
05:15:30.680 --> 05:15:34.240
here? What have you found?
He said, in alarm, This in

3667
05:15:34.279 --> 05:15:40.919
your waistcoat pocket? Nothing? A
little file, he muttered, Some drops

3668
05:15:40.919 --> 05:15:45.880
for my eyes. I've been troubled
by my eyes lately. She took out

3669
05:15:45.919 --> 05:15:49.680
the file. It was a tiny, dark blue bottle with a cut glass

3670
05:15:49.680 --> 05:15:55.439
stopper and no label. For your
eyes, she said, I did not

3671
05:15:55.599 --> 05:16:00.799
know. Yes, really, he
answered, give it me. But she

3672
05:16:00.919 --> 05:16:04.479
held it hidden in her two hands
and laughed, No, No, I

3673
05:16:04.520 --> 05:16:07.919
will not give it to you.
Why are you so uneasy? I shall

3674
05:16:07.919 --> 05:16:11.200
not break it? Does it smelt
I want to open it, but the

3675
05:16:11.200 --> 05:16:17.560
stopper's stuck. Eva, I entreat
you, give it me, he implored

3676
05:16:17.599 --> 05:16:22.599
her, and the perspiration stood on
his brow. It is nothing but drops

3677
05:16:22.599 --> 05:16:25.799
for the eyes, and it has
no scent. You will spill it and

3678
05:16:25.880 --> 05:16:30.319
it stains. But she puts her
hands behind her back. It is not

3679
05:16:30.479 --> 05:16:34.400
for the eyes, and you have
nothing the matter with yours, she said

3680
05:16:34.439 --> 05:16:40.880
positively. Yes, really, no, you are deceiving me. It is

3681
05:16:41.200 --> 05:16:44.799
it is something else, is it
not? Eva? Give it to me?

3682
05:16:45.599 --> 05:16:49.319
Does it take effect? Quickly?
She asked. Eva, I insist

3683
05:16:49.439 --> 05:16:53.720
give it me, he repeated,
angry now, and at his wits end,

3684
05:16:55.880 --> 05:16:59.680
he threw his arm round her and
tried to seize her wrists, but

3685
05:16:59.759 --> 05:17:03.599
he only grasped one empty hand,
while the other flung the file over his

3686
05:17:03.720 --> 05:17:08.439
head on the floor. There was
a little clatter of falling glass, and

3687
05:17:08.560 --> 05:17:12.840
before he could rise, she had
thrown her arms round him again, dragging

3688
05:17:12.919 --> 05:17:18.680
him down among the cushions. Let
it lie there, she murmured, with

3689
05:17:18.720 --> 05:17:22.680
a smile. It is broken.
I have broken it for you. Tell

3690
05:17:22.720 --> 05:17:26.439
me why did you carry that about
with you? It is not what you

3691
05:17:26.560 --> 05:17:30.240
fancy, he replied, still on
the defensive. So much the better.

3692
05:17:30.680 --> 05:17:37.360
Why did you have it? He
sat silent for a moment, then yielding

3693
05:17:37.400 --> 05:17:41.520
to her insistence, he said,
to take it when all was at an

3694
05:17:41.639 --> 05:17:45.959
end between us in the evening,
of course, And now you cannot do

3695
05:17:45.080 --> 05:17:49.000
so. Perhaps I can manage to
buy some more, he said, with

3696
05:17:49.040 --> 05:17:53.000
a gloomy laugh. But why is
everything to be at an end between us?

3697
05:17:55.080 --> 05:17:59.439
He was suddenly quite serious, mocking
no more at life and death.

3698
05:18:00.159 --> 05:18:03.799
For your sake, my angel,
for your happiness, I beseech you,

3699
05:18:04.240 --> 05:18:07.639
let it all be ended. Let
me feel that I no longer need to

3700
05:18:07.680 --> 05:18:12.279
make you wretched. You may yet
be happy, but I I feel that

3701
05:18:12.360 --> 05:18:18.200
everything in me hinders my ever being
happy, and all happiness must begin in

3702
05:18:18.279 --> 05:18:22.799
ourselves alone. And do you think
I shall let you go now that you

3703
05:18:22.840 --> 05:18:26.479
have just told me what you would
do in the evening. But you are

3704
05:18:26.520 --> 05:18:30.360
not to think that I should do
it only for your sake. I always

3705
05:18:30.400 --> 05:18:33.919
go about with that in my pocket. I have often thought of doing it,

3706
05:18:33.279 --> 05:18:37.599
But then I have thought of you, and I lacked courage, for

3707
05:18:37.639 --> 05:18:41.599
I know that you loved me only
too well, not too well. I

3708
05:18:41.639 --> 05:18:45.000
have lived in you, but for
you I should never have truly lived but

3709
05:18:45.200 --> 05:18:49.000
for me you might have lived with
another and have been happy. No,

3710
05:18:49.720 --> 05:18:53.639
never with any other. That could
never have been. I had to live

3711
05:18:53.680 --> 05:19:00.240
with you. It was fatality,
ay, fatality, Bertie, you to

3712
05:19:00.279 --> 05:19:06.080
say, do not mention Bertie.
As she spoke, the rain dashed against

3713
05:19:06.080 --> 05:19:11.279
the window panes in a perfect torrent. It is always raining, she murmured,

3714
05:19:12.000 --> 05:19:18.479
Yes, always, he mechanically repeated. She shuddered and looked in his

3715
05:19:18.599 --> 05:19:22.959
face. Why do you say that, she asked quickly. I do not

3716
05:19:23.119 --> 05:19:27.759
know, said he startled and bewildered. I really do not know. Why

3717
05:19:29.200 --> 05:19:33.799
what did I say? They were
both silent. Then she began again,

3718
05:19:33.959 --> 05:19:38.200
Frank, my darling, I will
not let you leave me again, not

3719
05:19:38.319 --> 05:19:42.200
even for a day. I shall
always be in terror for you. Let

3720
05:19:42.200 --> 05:19:47.479
there be an end to everything,
my child. No, no, listen,

3721
05:19:47.919 --> 05:19:52.159
Let us be together forever, forever
and ever. Let us lie down

3722
05:19:52.240 --> 05:19:57.200
to sleep while it is still raining. Eva together. You say yourself that

3723
05:19:57.319 --> 05:20:03.240
everything in you fails of happines,
and that nevertheless, happiness must come from

3724
05:20:03.240 --> 05:20:07.279
within. Well, it is the
same with me, And yet we love

3725
05:20:07.279 --> 05:20:11.400
each other, do we not?
Yes? Yes? Then why should we

3726
05:20:11.479 --> 05:20:15.799
remain awake in this weariful life?
It is always always raining? Give me

3727
05:20:15.840 --> 05:20:19.759
a kiss, Frank, a good
night's kiss, and let us sleep while

3728
05:20:19.799 --> 05:20:26.040
it rains. Let me go to
sleep in your arms. Eva, What

3729
05:20:26.119 --> 05:20:30.520
do you mean, he asked hoarsely, for he did not understand her.

3730
05:20:30.319 --> 05:20:34.439
I broke the file, broke it
for you, she went on wildly.

3731
05:20:34.720 --> 05:20:40.880
But you can always get another.
An icy chill shot through his very marrow

3732
05:20:41.119 --> 05:20:45.599
like a sudden frost. God in
heaven, Eva, what do you want?

3733
05:20:45.880 --> 05:20:49.479
She smiled at him, calmly,
with the soft light in her beaming

3734
05:20:49.560 --> 05:20:53.959
eyes, and she threw her arms
round him. So die with you,

3735
05:20:55.319 --> 05:21:00.720
my dearest, she whispered, as
in an ecstasy of joy. What good

3736
05:21:00.799 --> 05:21:04.200
can life do us? You were
right? You can never be happy again,

3737
05:21:04.680 --> 05:21:08.040
and I can never be happy with
you. And yet I will not

3738
05:21:08.200 --> 05:21:11.799
leave you, for you are all
in all to me. Then how can

3739
05:21:11.840 --> 05:21:15.799
we live? Or why? But, oh, Frank, to die together

3740
05:21:17.040 --> 05:21:22.159
in each other's arms, That is
the greatest bliss, A kindly poison,

3741
05:21:22.240 --> 05:21:27.040
Frank, nothing painful, something easy
to take that we can take together and

3742
05:21:27.159 --> 05:21:33.279
clasp each other and die, die, die. Frank shuddered with horror.

3743
05:21:34.000 --> 05:21:37.639
No, Weaver, no, he
cried. You must not wish that,

3744
05:21:38.040 --> 05:21:42.439
you cannot wish that. I forbid
it, Oh, do not forbid it,

3745
05:21:42.959 --> 05:21:48.279
she said, persuasively, falling on
the floor and embracing his knees.

3746
05:21:48.799 --> 05:21:52.680
Let us share the same fate.
That will be bliss. All about us

3747
05:21:52.680 --> 05:21:59.159
will be rose color and gold and
silver like a glorious sunset. Oh,

3748
05:21:59.360 --> 05:22:04.360
can you image anything more beautiful?
Frank? That is happiness, the happiness

3749
05:22:04.360 --> 05:22:08.560
we have looked for, which everyone
in this world is looking for. It

3750
05:22:08.720 --> 05:22:14.680
is paradise, It is heaven.
He was not carried away by her rapture,

3751
05:22:15.080 --> 05:22:18.840
but her words tempted him, as
with the promise of a brief joy

3752
05:22:18.880 --> 05:22:23.560
in this life and an unutterably peaceful
rest in death. He could say no

3753
05:22:23.680 --> 05:22:27.840
more to dissuade her, to check
her in the heavenward flight of her fancy.

3754
05:22:29.439 --> 05:22:33.759
But still he reflected that there were
no means at hand since the file

3755
05:22:33.959 --> 05:22:38.759
was broken. Eva had risen irresistibly
attracted to the spot where the file had

3756
05:22:38.799 --> 05:22:44.759
fallen. She stooped and picked it
up. It had fallen into the drapery

3757
05:22:44.799 --> 05:22:48.759
of a curtain. It was not
broken, only cracked and chipped. Not

3758
05:22:48.880 --> 05:22:55.799
a drop had been spilt. Frank, she screamed in her frenzied gladness.

3759
05:22:56.360 --> 05:23:00.560
It is not broken. Look it
is whole. It is Fate's would not

3760
05:23:00.599 --> 05:23:04.319
allow it to be broken. He
too was standing up, quaking with an

3761
05:23:04.479 --> 05:23:10.840
icy chill. She had already forced
out the stopper and half emptied the file

3762
05:23:10.959 --> 05:23:15.639
with a mad, ecstatic smile.
Eva, he shrieked, and quite calmly

3763
05:23:17.119 --> 05:23:21.880
smiling still, she handed it to
him. He looked at her for a

3764
05:23:21.959 --> 05:23:26.319
moment, feeling as if they too
were already no longer of this world,

3765
05:23:26.759 --> 05:23:32.000
as if they were floating in a
sphere of unknown natural laws in which strange

3766
05:23:32.080 --> 05:23:37.080
things must come to pass. The
world, as it seemed, was about

3767
05:23:37.119 --> 05:23:41.159
to perish in that deluge of pouring
rain. But he saw that she stood

3768
05:23:41.240 --> 05:23:48.159
waiting with her strange smile, and
he drank. It was quite dark.

3769
05:23:48.840 --> 05:23:52.200
They lay on the sofa, side
by side, in each other's arms.

3770
05:23:53.000 --> 05:23:57.520
He was dead. She raised her
head in an agony of alarm at the

3771
05:23:57.599 --> 05:24:03.599
storm which was raging outside and that
other storm which was raging in her dying

3772
05:24:03.639 --> 05:24:08.560
body. The lightning glared white,
and the thunder was close overhead, but

3773
05:24:08.759 --> 05:24:14.319
louder than the echoes in the air. The thunder came rolling on towards Eva,

3774
05:24:14.919 --> 05:24:19.479
nearer and nearer, louder and louder. A supernatural thunder on the wheels

3775
05:24:19.520 --> 05:24:26.040
of the spheres tis coming. She
murmured, in the anguish of death,

3776
05:24:26.720 --> 05:24:32.959
Great heavens. The thunder again,
and she sank, convulsed on the body

3777
05:24:33.040 --> 05:24:37.639
of her lover, hiding her head
under his coat to die. There then

3778
05:24:37.799 --> 05:24:42.959
came a shuffling step in the passage
outside the dark room. An old man's

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thin voice twice called the name of
Eva, and a hand opened the door.

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End of section nine, end of
Footsteps of Fate by Luis Kuperus,

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translated by Clara Bell, read by
Phil Benson in Sydney, Australia,