Uh, they are traveling with their closest friends for the Ultimate girls Trip,
not all their closest friends. Right, what's that? Oh? Jeezus,
I interrupted? You go ahead? Sorry, Oh way, pat ask him,
okay, what'd you get it? First? Ask him what he got?
Would would you get a club on a sup A club on a sup
on? Sorry? It was pretty good. Okay, you were saying.
One guest is semi coach? Ask him do they put another piece of bread
in there? Ask him if they put like a club? Yeah, Kalin,
I'm sorry. Do they split the bread like a you know, like
a typical club? Is there? Is there a three layer? Because that's
a club? Hilo. Welcome to the second episode of the week. It
is into the below Deck podcast show. I'm Dylan. I'm settled up next
to one Patrick Kikey. Permission to coupleboard granted. Public service announcements. Love
is Blind at Patreon dot com. Slash another podcast network. Season one coverage
of Belowdeck at Patreon dot com, Slash another podcast network, Lots of Crazy
Stuff, another podcast show show where we'd really just Gavin goof. We talked
about your wife's disgusting hall pass list over the Oh yeah, her Hall passes
Jonah Hill and Tom Hanks and Chat Hanks, which is the hall pass list
of mentally unwell person And I love Sharre, but that is disgusting. You're
burying the lead though. Yeah, you can listen to us talk about hall
passes. By the way, we had a challenge for all our listeners there
over at patreon dot com slash another podcast network. We wanted your hall passes,
but we wanted your hall passes that aren't celebrities. So you can feel
it's safe space in there. You can put in the comments section you're anonymous.
We don't know if you can put your little funny names in there.
Yeah, and you could secon rider, I want to sleep with my neighbor.
Yeah yeah, and uh, no one's going to know who you're talking
about, Sarahka Latreust like Robert de Niro said, and meet the parents and
then meet the Fokkers and then the third one. So we're here season one,
no, I said, though, oh you did, okay? Adrian
from season one comes on our newest podcast and she talks some shit. Yeah,
and we talked some ship too. I mean it was a tough episode
for her because it was an episode wherein she was titually called out as being
the devil, so she endured some tough questions from me and Pat. It
was. It was an interesting interview we learned about she gives it as good
as she can take it or is it the opposite, she takes it as
good as she can give it. Yeah, she threw it back at us.
It was fun banter. As the point I'm trying to make, yeah,
yeah, And I think we're going to conclude our season coverage of season
one by having three people from the show wrap up the season with us.
We'll attempt to, but they're sea rats. You know, you never know
what these sea rats speaking of, We have a crazy sea rat filled episode
of Below Deck to get into. Pat, how did you feel about the
second one of the week. Okay, I'm not gonna lie. I really
enjoyed watching the proposal to be a girlfriend thing. I think they called it
tick the box. Yeah, will you marry me? Girlfriend? M Yeah?
Yeah. I was so confident that when he did this proposal that she
would say no. I was very surprised with this, although I will say,
and we'll get into the episode, despite her giving a verbal yes in
her head, also said yes, but I think her heart and her vagina
wanted to be on Mars. But that's just me or vagina wanted to be
on Mars. I didn't think she wanted any part of it. But then
at the tail of the episode, he has a an ultimatum given to him
hang out in the jacuzzi with your six back and your funny hair, or
cross the threshold of door number five. Yeah. I think he chose correctly,
but I was shocked at he was given the ultimatum. God, I
think thought, I think we just covered the entire episode. No, just
at first four minutes, okay, uh oh and then yeah the end too,
So pretty much the entire episode. Yeah yeah, yeah, but you
know that that's the Oreo cookie. We just but but we need to explore
the filling inside made out of pig hoofs. That's what this episode was.
Okay, okay, Dylan. I touched on this on the Last Step podcast
that we did here Ken just public service announcement. Can fucking Confections and Nabisco,
Can you guys chill the fuck out please. We do not need cold
brew caramel M and m's. We do not need oops, it's mint and
peanut butter oreos, Like, what is going are these people on fucking app?
I said, at these companies, there's nothing wrong with just peanut M
and m's us buying sprite tic TACs. I saw a sprite tic TACs the
other day. I mean, Dylan, if you get hired at one of
these companies under new product development, you gotta come up with something. Yeah,
yeah, I can crazy, I gotta call kill him. There's a
preference sheet meeting in here, and he's already on his way back down.
He did it again. And you know what I planned for this? You
did, so I don't need to call him. I kind of planned for
Why don't you call him? All right? Let me call him, by
the way, I thought. All right, So here's the problem with this.
In most seasons of Below Deck, you get around the episode fourteen fifteen,
all the good stuffs out of the way. Margot didn't get fired for
being a boozer. We already had all that other problematic stuff take place.
A couple of people have been fired. You know, I don't think Captain
Hantpants has it in him to fire another person. Especi actually this late in
the charter season. Yeah, yeah, so I think we're gonna just wind
this down. Yeah, it's like Genghis Khan towards the end was like I've
seen enough, Is that right? Yeah? He it was a moral quandary.
Towards the end, they got him to stop beheading and raping people.
Oh that's nice. Yeah. Yeah, it's kind of like liar liar,
kind of figuring out a lesson in the end. Hey, Kaylin, I'm
telling you, we're gonna get to like the preference sheep meeting in like ten
minutes. Helen, I'm telling you, Oh, he's in firehouse subs right
now. Oh you're in fire house. You're at firehouse. Yeah, okay,
Hey Kaylin, can you get that Preference sheep meeting out of the way.
We're gonna call you back in like ten minutes. Uh yeah, y'all
load it up on my computer. All all right, sounds good, I'll
talk to you, said all right by Didow. Yeah, he should tell
you no more often. He's done with work. He's at firehouse, SUPs
getting god knows what on a piece of bread, and you gonna make him
open up his computer. I didn't make him do anything. I asked him
politely. You're like keith Rin Jerry d him fucked up. I thought the
episode was wonderful. I mentioned it last episode that was all over the place.
I apologize for that. But Culver and private school girl on this dock
and the kind of Greek chorus of mockery surrounding this entire thing was fucking amazing,
absolutely amazing. We had an insight into sea rat decorum and custom this
week in the bill coverage. Who gets the tab? Oh yes? And
Culver, like any good boyfriend of someone who is impossibly too hot for you
would do, he makes her pay and not just have Gosh, it's not
just a hey, they're coming early tomorrow, let's take it easy. He
gets He is almost stuck with the let's have eight coconut chili margarita knights.
Like this bill was, I'm excited to talk about this waitress, one of
the pushiest people I've ever seen about. Oh she doesn't want him to run
out on the bill man, Oh no, no, I'm just talking about
the ordering. It's like, we're just gonna send out one of everything,
and can I get eight coconut spicy Margarita's seven. I'll have a normal drink
and not fucking toilet water. With a hob and arrow on the side of
it. My god, no, I do not want that. But anyways,
lots of crazy things in Sue fun episode for pots. So let's get
into the in tick Box the whole thing. We pick up with Tickbox ultimatum.
What's that spider you compared uh Schoolgirl too? Well, she loved Okay,
I love that analogy, Dylan, and a lot of people that saw
heard that in the podcast did as well. Yeah, what is at play
for Jim? Just toying with food? Okay, Yeah, that's it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think there's got to be an end though.
I think that there's something wrong with Private school Girl. Okay, obviously,
I mean there's something wrong with all of us. But of course,
yeah, I think it's just tedium. Yeah, yeah, I think it's
ted It's tedium. It's proximity. It's there, and it's toying with your
food. It's like if Tom was always caught Jerry and and fucked him,
you know that kind of Okay, Circadian Drive, Yeah to Torment, Yeah,
cats, paw Mama Jamas. Yeah. Well anyway, okay, so
we have to talk about, yeah, the whole thing. So my favorite
part of this is Harry and Luca just taking the absolute piss out of them
while they're doing this. There's so much camaraderie around. How insane this is.
Uh Joe, He's like, these crazy kids. I get that they're
gonna have such a happy two week relationship. Luke is like, well if
she hasn't ticked the box. Yeah, I mean everyone is making fun of
this because it's just fucking hilarious. You know, I got I got high.
I got stuck on the couch watching this. And the danger of that
is that if you are coma toast into an apathetic and immovable state marijuana,
the remote, you know, be at an inch or five feet away from
you, is too far to do anything with, which means that coming up
next is Couch Talk with Captain Lee and kits Dan Lee. I watched Lee
break this down and and Lee is just like, I mean you can see
how uncomfortable she is. Yeah, why is this a show? Oh we
know? Yeah, he's four sener. Well yeah, if if you don't
have enough Lee in your life, he's got a podcast. Now. Yeah,
we'll talk about that behind the paywall. So culver, we talked about
it last episode, and I want to stop being So we have a tough
job because we don't talk about things on this podcast. We talk about people,
So it gets a little messy sometimes, and saying something like Culver is
too dumb to realize how in a appropriate this is is a mean thing to
say. But I do think it's his saving grace because I don't think he
is aware of how uncomfortable he's making her. You know, it's not picking
up on it at all. I don't think that it's malicious. I don't
think that it's kind of using people in any way. I just think he's
blissfully ignorant of how painfully awkward this is. I will say this, though,
I'll give it to him. This is definitely cutting off Luca at the
pass he saw a competition coming on the boat. Come on, you could
feel it. It's palpable. He's a very attractive man and clearly Jamay was
attracted to him. And I think this is Culver going immagining you out.
Yeah, locking it down. Well, we move on to the rest of
the boat. Serena and Margot have an unbelievable this is this is kind of
oddly enough. It's these little moments that are making me just fall in love
with the show when you're talking about the real moment, with the true friendship
of these SI rats. I mean, it's beautiful. Zerena is very supportive
because Margot basically cops to, uh, yeah, I should have probably been
fired because I'm on I was drinking on the job, and then Szerena basically
says, hey, look, we've all been there kind of thing. We're
all fucking seat. But she also hears Margot go, you know, we're
not allowed to drink on the boat. Serena says, what excuse you?
No? I mean the sense of humor on Serena, it's just unbelievable.
So many of them are so funny. I mean Asia getting Asia gets so
fucked up, man, how good is tofu? It's just unbelievable. Now,
I will say one thing against Kermit, and Zarina kind of brings it
up in this conversation with Margot, because Margot ships her and Juwa right,
you know, she's like, why don't you guys, you know, get
a room and whatnot, And then Zorena reminds us that she's got a few
things to contend with, one being that Kerma. It's pretty fucking judgy about
Yeah, Kermit's not happy, but no, no, no no. Also
she'd be banging one of her friends exes. That's problematic. It is problematic.
And most of these bomances go nowhere. You know, DC rats have
loved and lost and experienced this mostly lost. Yeah yeah, yeah right yeah
uh so yeah, all things are against this consummation of this little uh relationship.
Yeah. I was gonna say something awful and I didn't, and I'm
proud of myself, so that's not gonna stop Serena though. They're talking about
being dolphins rubbing up against each other, and she rubs his cock. Yes,
and that's smoothie is down there. Well, she greets him, tells
him she shaved, she's ready to get in the jacuzzi tonight, and then
she rubs his balls. I want to say that I feel so bad for
women. You have to be and of course you don't have to do anything
right, but there's so much more surface area exposed, and those little spidies
can pop out anywhere. You have to take care of them, you know,
and you don't have to do anything, but you know, take it
away, take it away from okay, okay, okay, I love the
Zerina laid this on the table because guys were dumb. We're confused. We
don't know if it's go time? Are you into us? You know?
We know is killing? Fuck? Well, when a woman's telling you she's
shaved and she's ready to getting a bikini and jacusy, I mean, it's
not a done deal. Maybe she wants you to go down on her.
You know, when I was fourteen, I lost my virginity. Kelly,
I won't say her last name. I'm wearing the I'm working the concession stand
at Whale and Park. Yeah, and we've been dating for about two months,
you know, And she walks is this a personal story? Oh yeah,
yeah, this is how she told me it was go time? Oh
really? She walks up to me. She hands me the fucking what do
you call this on a can? The tab, the tab, the tab,
the tongue, the tap of any kind of aluminum can, the nipple
of the can. She hands it to me, and I turned to my
cowork She walks off and smiles, and they said, ah, what's this
mean? And Sully goes, it means she wants to oh yeah, yeah.
And that was in nineteen ninety one. That threw a move on her
and she was like, what are you doing? I needed to throw that
away. No, I lost my Virginia that night. Oh cool. Yeah,
anyway, there's a it's a some women will tell you when it's when
you will. They're giving you the green light, you know. And that's
what Serena was doing. I appreciate it. I love Serena. You know,
we got to text a little bit or whatever this weekend. She says,
there's more exciting stuff to come in this season. I begged to differ.
So Margot goes downstairs and she the three girls, private school girl,
Margo, and Asia all have a little power, and this is an example
of three women who do not know each other well enough to help anyone.
Margot is reading the bizarre scratchings of Lego ahead and Asia is over the moon.
Over the moon, that's how you deserve it. Over the moon,
jama Private school girl Sheilab is on the verge of tears, and Asia is
screaming, and Margo is thinking, I think she's on the verge of tears.
And no one is really doing anything except this kind of full congratulations over
I don't know. I wouldn't equate it to celebrating a diagnosis, but it's
not anything to sell it. Yeah, hey, del this is how I
say amazing, oh amazing. How does Kermit say amazing? You know,
I you've you've done this to me again and and she says it like this,
Oh it's amazing, and it's bad. I don't I don't do a
good Kermit, and you keep fucking you keep you know what. I thought
you did a great job. Thanks. You want to talk about the Vans
and them, the girls concocting this game of sorts, which I thought it
was gonna be an exercise, has happened. You put me all up in
my listen. It's not a big deal. You do, Kermit. You
know the only no, the only way we can do this. We have
to move forward. I think everybody is happy that you did that because that
was phenomenal. So, yes, we had to mischief and oh that's restaurant.
Yeah. I thought in the van the girls were gonna like, hey,
let's come up with all these questions to get to know why our fellow
Sea rats better. Yeah, no, no, no, no, we
just want to learn about Luca more. Yeah. They wanted to learn about
Luca because he's the he's the fresh meat, and we get to mischief and
meet the pushiest waitress of all time. And these people. You see these
people a lot in Los Angeles. I didn't mean to sound like Bill Maher
there, but I did. Dah. These people, these writers, you
don't deserve to make a living. Okay, why don't you go call another
sex worker and make her sign whatever and stay out of it. So this,
this often happens in Los Angeles, and we've joked about it before.
The waitress who comes and asks if we're familiar with the way they do things
here, which spoiler alert is reading off a menu, receiving the food,
even the food, and paying for the food exorbitant. But these waiters and
waitresses come up to you and they recommend Joey chestnut amounts of food for the
table, and they're so nonchalant in this that should be that should be enough
for everybody. You have to have the courage to tell these people we're not
going to order a mount olympus of top us here. Okay, we're not
going to turn this thing into a competitive eating show. Okay, we're just
trying to catch up with our friends in from New York. I don't want
to ship my pants after this. But this waitress is of that bride.
She comes out, she's like, we're gonna be sending out specials. We're
going to be sending out some of our favorites. And we've got a new
drink. It's a chilly coconut margarita. Can I get your guys eight?
Go away? She'd be the head trainer for waite staff at my restaurant,
Dylan, Yeah, yeah, Oh she's a damn good waitress. Yes,
yes, damn good waitress. But but you thought the same thing, right,
Those those drinks looked absolutely I can't do the specialty cocktails. There's just
they're so often a miss Well, I kind of enjoyed, uh, the
what's the word for it. I enjoyed the forwardness of the waitress. Did
I make you have an opinion on something you didn't have an opinion on?
Well? No, I actually did have an opinion when you mentioned, like,
do you know how we do things here? One of my good buddies,
Sebastian, who is famously features mass Yeah, kitchen nightmares. But the
g man he definitely could say that because he'd walk up to a table and
said, do you know how we do things. Yeah, okay, we
got twenty two flavors. You choose the flavor. You can even have it
on French fries, a pizza, which or a salad. This is how
we do things here. You can get chicken, parmer, veal, veal
palm, a shrimp pom. Okay, you can have that protein and a
better rice, a better greens, a better eggplant, lots of things.
Just walk through it. And the G Man is like, I've never in
mind line Bush, I've never had someone in my life that I believe in
as little as I do you. Yeah, dude. The g Man back
in the day was was hitting below the belt. Allah Sarah this evening,
and I can't believe we didn't talk about this fucking gaggle of monsters that come
aboard this says, I'm kidding, these these girls are self on. These
women are so I've reached out to guh, We're gonna get to the bottom
of this relationship. Gee's a nutbag, But I mean Sarah went below the
belt, as Zara said, that's fucking one of the meanest things I've ever
heard anyone say to another person. We had to we had to pick rows
to see who would room with you? Ah, shoot me with a goddamn
arrow. Don't say that, be it barbed or otherwise. Don't say that.
All right, So we sit down and we ask Luca some questions to
really get to know him. Do you wax your balls? As the first
question from Rasha, are you single? Comes from Margo? Yikes, little
brutal to Harry. What's the best thing to ever happen to you? From
Serena. What a question that is? Like, I think you should leave
kind of comment what's the best thing to ever happen to you? And the
Sigmacai vibes are going up and down this table. He's like, uh me,
no, you guys, they're just having so much. I do want
to say this. So drinks were drink but the sea rats normally, and
I always had a problem with this, like, guys, can't you just
go out and have a fucking Why do you have to not remember what took
place the night before? Right? And totally, But on this night I
think everybody kind of held it together. Yeah. I mean, listen,
when you see a guy die and you see his friend's nutcare and you see
them tell you that he's in Melbourne, you gotta go out and drink that
away. It needs to get filed into the subconscious quickly and dealt with at
a later date. But we've got work to do. We've got people to
fuck. The bill hits. It's a sea One thing you missed is uh
oh the making out on this making out, Zarina says, don't embarrass me,
and then her and Juel just starts sucking face. Yeah, kind of
hot, I think, So don't embarrass me. That's like that's essentially give
someone the nipple of a sprite camp. It's like, I'm about to make
out with you. Yes, that's cool. So the bill hits and sea
rat tradition. Like I said, like any good boyfriend, he makes the
hottest girl he's ever been with in his life. Pay for the bill.
Did you catch it? When he went up to talk to her about it,
she said fuck off. Yeah, well he does the thing where he
goes, hey, can I give you a little cash for that? And
she says fuck off. I don't know if she's like intrigued by his there's
this thing where, of course he's drooling over her, but he's not doating
the way that I'm sure so many men have been to her, and I
think she's probably intrigued by that. Yeah, he's playing it right now.
I don't think he's playing anything. I just think he's doing unaware. Yeah,
all right, So we've talked to a lot of sea rats and this
is this what do you call it? How they handled the bills? This
is pretty much sea rat Like. God, why can't I think tonight We've
been talking for so long, We've done many parts. Anyways, this is
normal every night or every time they go out, a different sea rat will
pay for it. And the fact that it was his turn and then he
fucking hides. When the bill comes, it's pretty slimy, little slimy,
and also slimy from the rest of the sea rats, and I think that's
an indication of how they feel about Culver. Like I said, I think
this bill was probably bigger than other bills, a little more padded. And
this is when Harry's like, hey, brother, it's your turn. You
know, I don't know, I could be wrong. But they get in
the car and Culver is mocked for having Jamie pay and this is where he
gets a little nasty, like Culver is the odd man out in the camaraderie
of the crew. I feel like a little bit. I know, he
does his Keith Stone, but there's there's a tree ruth to the revelry with
the other sea rats. That is not so with Jamay, Private school Girl
and Culver. He's getting rased as he should be rased. And he says
Harry has a tough time reading women. Now it's it's funny, but it's
also like kind of out of context cutting and Culver's not really laughing about it.
He's just like in a defensive posture. And I was just like,
oh god, we're having such a good time. What the fuck? Man?
Yeah, you know you gotta pay for the bill. So we head
back to the boat. Everyone is rat fucked a shot chief among them.
She is, I mean, Jamay comes up to her and she goes hey,
Asia and Asias like yeah, can we uh come on the if we
put new sheets in room five, can we have sex in there? And
He's just like yeah. Jimmy is like great, I'm gonna go make the
bed. Asha just wants to eat cup of noodles and watch whatever traffic accident
on Twitter she's watching and go to sleep. She is a leader, but
Private school girls, a little pissed. She got the sheets in room five
ready, and Culver is this is one of those things where he's not locked
in on her the way that other men have. He wants to party with
the rest of everybody, while he also wants to play pretend with a character
he stole from a key Light commercial, Yeah from twelve years ago, new
un original bastard. Yeah. Yeah. So he heads up for a little
mullet and budgee time and Jamay is pissed off. She gets in her bikini,
conceding to his desires to party in the jacuzzi, and that's when he
comes down. And this is the most black widow moment where she's just like
get in the room, and I'm just like, what is going on here?
There's like kind of a venomous thing. Am I? Am? I
putting too much onus on her? Well, it's just confusing because supermodel Culver,
why so get in the room. We're all asking that same question,
Dylan, Okay, because your silence and my hesitancy is making me question whether
or not chooses door number five the correct choice, sir. Yeah, Now
I'm far more interested in Yeah, they finally hit it apparently four times,
but will they quit it now? The next morning, Zerina appears have buyer's
remorse. Can I really quickly say, quite a creepy cam? They go,
oh, you know you sign up for the show. You know they're
gonna watch you beat off? Fuck? Yeah, this is really intimate.
I mean they're really having sex with each other. And they cut to some
kind of goblin fish in the ocean. I don't understand. I get the
bee pollinating the flower, but not some fucking deep sea alien. I don't
know. It didn't make any sense. Go ahead, Oh yeah, yeah,
So anyway, look here's Zaree and I'll I want, I hope we
can interview her. She said she'd come on. This is not this pr
for this season. Oh boy, don't like you get me back to we
are not supposed to say their names. Yeah, all right, so Zerina,
it's not really discussed that much. But she does have a friend that
dated this guy, and yeah, you know, look, I look,
if you've moved on, people should get to do what they want to do.
But seeing as there are seven billion people on the planet, did you
have to fuck the guy I dated? Well, Pat, and I'll say
it again. I see rats fair enough. It's like, uh, okay,
I think this has appened. Who who's that family that ate each other
stuck in the Colorado Mountains? Oh? Wait, they ate each other in
Colorado. Yeah, they got snow down. You're not talking about the soccer
team that ate each other. Well, they ate each other too, let's
call it the soccer team. Right, they're they're getting a plague crash,
right, they fucking hit somebody in the head with the stone. They start
eating as ass, fucking haunches all that ship. And it's only because they're
in that group. And someone like you comes along and goes, hey,
there are seven billion people on this planet. Could you have eaten anybody else?
And it's like, hey, listen, I'm fucking stuck on a boat
with this guy. I'm gonna eat living in the here and now. Yeah,
I'm gonna eat his fucking quads. And he's circumcised, so that's a
plus as well. Yeah, although I feel like people who aren't circumcised get
a bad rap. And I think if you watch porn you realize that,
you know, it's kind of cool. You know, it's like it's like
a worm coming out of his lair. You know every once in a while.
Yeah, no, no, no, I think it's like a kind
of like there's like a chambering thing you can do that you can't do with
our normal fucking cocks. You know, they robbed us of that. I'm
looking at getting one put on. I had a consultation with the guy said
can you make it look good? He's like, what do you mean?
I was like, what do you mean? What do I mean? You
know you're not the right guy? And I walked out telehealth too, very
awkward. All right, So Harry is the cutest. He wakes up.
He's like, I do not want to see the sunlight. I do not
want to see the sunlight. And he's like, oh my god, what
a beautiful day. Juah and z Arena finally porked. What a time.
Oh Asia says that to hot captain in just the lowdest, funniest way.
What a team? What a time? I have written down what a team?
What a time? And it is time now to pluck that young man
out of fires. What is it called firehouse firehouse? Yeah yeah, firehouse
subs? Firehouse subs? Is that the place that makes the gas station sandwiches?
But you can just get them fresh. No, no, no,
no, they make it fresh there and they donate like ten percent of the
profits to uh fire departments around the country. Great, that's sweet. Still,
before we get him, Kaylin and the blower, A Kermit reports to
Captain hot Pants that Jay and juwal boned and I'm sure that needs to be
noted in the boat's manifesto, alongside a guest almost dying crewmember nearly killing everyone
by dropping an anchor prematurely weird. Oh, and h Boson fuck the chef.
Yeah, it's like the guest Book of Horror. Yeah, here we
go. I'm so happy that the company donates all that money to fire departments
because they need it more than ever. Now there's a lot of fires,
and there are a lot of people who are running at people with access and
they need to go help them. I agree. Hey, Kaylin, Uh,
it's time for the preferentiate minute egg. What do you got for us?
All? Right? Carner number eight San Francisco based co primaries and longtime
friends Zara Robotham and Melissa Peroni. Uh. They are traveling with their closest
friends for the ultimate girls Trip, not all their cluessest friends, right,
what's that. Oh jeezus, rupted, you go ahead? Sorry? Oh
way, pat him? Okay, what'd you get in first? Ask him
what he got? What'd you get? A club on? This up?
A club on a sup on? Sorry, it was pretty good. Okay,
you were saying. One guest is semi coach? Ask him? Do
they put another piece of bread in there? Ask him? Like a club?
Yeah, I'm sorry. Do they split the bread like, you know,
like a typical club? Is there? Is there three layers? Because
that's a club? No? Okay, sorry? Yeah, one guest,
the semi kosher or another doesn't like starch, and the third one doesn't like
gluten. Chef he is annoyed at the dietary restrictions and just hates girls trips.
Yeah, uh, guests want a late lunch of high tea with a
mad Hatter theme and second night dinner cuisine is up to the chef, but
they want a neon low decor theme and the get crew must dress as the
thunder from down on it. Can you ask him if it was chicken or
turkey? That is your preference? Me? Great job? Did is there
chicken or turkey as the protein? There is there chicken? Oh? The
girl that doesn't like a s also doesn't like chicken. No, I'm sorry.
The club in a sub it's turkey, yeah I thought it was so
it's turkey, lettuce, tomato, bacon in a sub row? Is that
what it is? Kyln you did a great job in the preference meeting,
buddy, all right, thanks guys, all right, bye, Well there
you have it. G did not mention that she was lactose intolerant. It's
not a club. I didn't even hear what was on it. Does a
club even have cheese on it? I guess I'm gonna have swiss, right,
I don't think a club has cheese. No, it's supposed to be
bacon, lettuce, tomato, right, and then turkey or I think it's
chicken though, and we're in California. They also had the avocado man.
Yeah. Well, anyway, Margot is back in the laundry room. I
feel for her guests. Rive Harry tells us he's got a real knack for
flirting with those old women. That's because they want to hand you a lollipop
and take it to Disneyland, your skinny, little weirdo. Not seeing this
on Instagram, a lot people doing these chopped sandwiches. People really have no
notion of what things are not anymore. We're boking convention de Yeah, today
I'm gonna be making a BLT. I chopped up some lettuce, some tomatoes,
some bacon. I threw in some olives, some onions, some peppercinis
and put some honey mustard on there. And I'm just like, we're doing
something else here. And and I don't know why this has five hundred thousand
likes because we're doing something else. I I gotta get off the internet just
period. It's not good for you. Hey, you're not on the internet,
You're just on the Jeopardy app. I don't do it. I don't
do any of that I have. I'm a pretty happy guy. Man.
Hey, the guests arrive, you know, uh, do you know that
hot Pants tells the guests they look fantastic? Yeah, I don't think you
need to say that, hot Pants. Oh really, Now you're the captain,
you don't need to comment on how people look. Well, I'm drive
about. I didn't think that private school girl needed to tell Margot she was
being going to be doing a lot of steaming. That was a little brutal,
but cute plates get dropped. Margot has no clue what kosher is.
She's like this one I think is slaughtered properly or something. I don't know
what you joosy to be fair, though neither does Asha, and neither do
I really, I don't know what the fuck kosher is. You can have
cheese here, you can't have the cheese touch this here. I mean,
there's lots of finicky rules that Chaudie is at Chacuderie for the gods that is
laid out. The platters are magnificent, but not gods that are lactose intolerant.
No, and there's a lot of cheese. G. G starts with
it already, And to be fair to G, the women go in on
G. But G is kind of a magnet for abuse because G is out
of her fucking mind. G is talking about how she took her pill,
and she's talking about her lactose intolerancy or her lactose intolerance, as though it
it is something that needs to be taught, talked about more than zero times.
Yeah, just shut up about it, right, nobody really cares.
You've talked about this pill like four times now, Dylan. Something's occurring occurring
here that is becoming a theme in the below Deck kind of franchise, which
is people are coming on the boats and they're not actually a group of friends.
Yeah, there's someone that could afford eighteen thousand dollars and are willing to
be filmed. There's someone who the other people on the boat had to avoid
the punishment of staying with. That's not a friend. No, no,
no, no, no, yeah, that's I gotta talk to g or,
I gotta talk to Sarah. Well, the lactose intolerance stuff is going
to be an issue when we get to high Tea because there's clotted cream,
there's fingers sand which is I don't know, there's cream cheese on that.
You know, Gee's got to walk through a minefield before we sit down.
The women are beginning with their vulture, uh, like descending upon the men.
I was gonna say this High Tea hour, Uh, this event looks
more like a fucking mixer for singles than it does. Yeah, yeah,
yeah, a work environment. I was fearing a role reversal segment tonight from
you. Are we getting that? No? Not really? Yeah yeah right,
no. No. The difference is, like the men are willing participants
in this. They're willing participants. Now that doesn't mean that the women have
to treat their palms as platters for Harry's testicles. But you know, there
is a difference in that Harry coteep kick this this drunk dever set over the
boat if he wanted to. So that's why it's different. But you know,
you you, like Asha said, we went way over the line.
But we're not there yet. We are at high tea. We cut to
Jamay. She says, I think that Matt Hatter is from Alan and Wonderland
or is that the ten man this is? I don't think it's okay?
Do you know what I mean? All right? When you said that,
are you referring to g bringing this up, Sarah and Shoshana? And also
I forget that I'm referring to Jamie not having any fucking idea what's going on
in Alice in Wonderland or Wizard of Oz. It's just a little nuts to
me. They're they're so maybe Australia is different. I don't know. Yeah,
maybe they have their own things over there. Yeah, they probably got
their own things, and you know, maybe it was my Jewish grandma or
something. I don't know. I think everybody should probably know that it's not
allan in Wonderland high Tea. We've got Macarin scones, clotted cream finger sandwhich
is a lovely looking kiche. I feel like this might be wasted on these
ladies. They do a mayor Amricans get whether a high tea is a seven
or a nine, Like I just I don't know. The whole thing looked
beautiful. I mean they're fans. They were falling over themselves over that they
loved it. Yeah, Luca is dressed up in the Matt Hatter costume.
Serena says, I'm oddly attracted to you right now. Serena, you got
you had sex like five times last night. What are you doing doing this
right now? It's completely unnecessary. Just fall in love with ju Wow.
I ship you guys. So the fight begins. Gee is being careful about
the dairy once again, and Show says you're eating the cheese right now.
Gee pipes up in to quote the other Primaries description of her kind of a
country way. She says, I know my body, thank you, thank
you. You don't need to speak to me about my body. I really
know it. And this is when the women get pissed. Now, No
one needs to tell Gee Sarah that they were all talking about how they hate
you. But also, why are you bringing up that you're gonna have diarrhea?
If you have a pharmaceutical fix to the problem, just you take the
pill and let's talk about anything other than your dire right to be fair to
g I believe she mentioned it once or twice and she was just checking in
with chefs Arena, and that's when it seems like she got ganged up on.
Quite honestly, Yeah, but checking in with chef Serena, it doesn't
make any sense. She's like, I just want to let you know I'm
lactos and tolerant, but I have a pill to fix the issue that I'm
having. So let's just have a conversation. Conversation about what you said you
had the pill. What are we talking about? Oh mix in? Uh,
you know for mimosas on the boat's in for mimosas before you got on
the boat. Self obsession. Yeah, things get a little crazy fast.
Look and I'll say this, Karmit nails it. This isn't an argument about
it's bigger than the lat Yeah, it's bigger than the lactose, So we
missed the beach unfortunately because of the fight. The moon is II and this
guy and the guests head out for a little rallying. We're blackout in the
jacuzzi and that's when hot ass comes out. Good on him. They asked
him to go to dinner and he goes apps fucking lutely not. You know
what would happen if that man sat down at that dinner table. One hundred
percent, someone would have reached under the table to try grab his balls,
grab his dick or something, rub the inside of his thigh. Something would
have happened, at least a thigh rub. And he doesn't deserve that.
No, no, no, he's trying to just be up in the crow's
nest in a Hawaiian shirt, looking out onto the dark blackness of the open
ocean. He's got a job to do. So Jaw and Serena have a
chat about the relationship. Oh I thought this was cute. He asked out
on a dinner day. I think this is adorable. I'm so happy for
them. They are sea rats, so who knows if they're going to last
except for everybody, But this was cute. Let's get to dinner and a
table full of sexual ass. Been lucky for Harry, you know. And
the guys, like I mentioned, they can stiff arm. Not only are
they soft targets already, but they're absolutely shit faced, so no real harm
is going to be done. But again, one of them just starts smacking
them in the ass. And don't forget that, Sarah, she wanted sea
balls on her face. Yeah, yeah, yeah, And Luke is like,
they're talking about getting fucking bottles in their face, and I'm like,
what are we doing here? But the other one bends over again. I
don't mean to allude to the child who was taken over by demon Emily Rose,
but she kind of backbends and walks like a spider underneath the table so
that she can get close to the testicles. Now she starts in a kind
of hieroglyphic, kind of Egyptian wall painting, kind of going like this to
their balls, Lady Justice I described, yeah, but not blind and actually
looking at the cocks and sticking her tongue out and mimicking licking their nipples.
So less dignified but more fun, you know, really good time, really
good time. The boys come out. Animalism is up next. Oh yeah,
yeah, they'res This is Caligula type stuff. The boys escape safely,
and we had to next week's episode where we're gonna have Margo asked to be
third stew again. We're gonna have Harry stepping in inappropriately per a kermit about
recommending that she not being the room of Yeah, the doom of God.
Why can't find the doom and glimm of the laundry room? Now? Who
knows? Somebody might die next week? Maybe they just you know, are
slow playing at her bearing the lead. But it does look like a pretty
boring episode. Hopefully it's not. It probably won't be because this crew is
so amazing. We've had such a good time breaking the season down. Love
you for listening. Join us at patreon dot com for season one. Join
us at patreon dot com for Love is Blind. We love you guys very
much. I'm Dylan saying goodbye, pat Say goodbye, dudes,