Made uh de Saint John, Oh, thanks, Sonny sum On, I
hadon nice so nte? What's up everybody? It's it's us me and Stephanie.
Yes, it's for crying out loud. Let us say hello to our
fabulous got a new one? Oh HOI Meg Malloy. Yes, and we
saw her yesterday on our zoom. Oh it was really nice. The zoom
was so fun. Zoom hangout and Rachel Newcome? Why did you not?
She's not new anymore. I know she's that's Rachel Oldcome. And Ashley she's
so she she was there briefly. She made an appearance. Kelly Laddie da
Amy's a count She was not there. Katie's rolling on e not Anna faris
Aaron? Who is? She was there? Nikki call your girl? Not
there? Leslie accosting people left and right. Yeah, and the other one's
coughing up a storm. Still, it's a lot. It's two attention seeking
at this point, it's enough already. Jacob is so growy and he was
there. Rita was rocking. Elizabeth Williamson's kids who also was there. Hi,
Elizabeth, Fina Ginscherd. We live your dancing, probably, we live
your pancakes. Valerie hit it out of the park and came to the zoom.
Katerina get that, Moler check Gabby and Missy. Neither one of them
were they're white out crossing that right, losing their flip flops. Not there,
Rebecca, No, but jo cute. Not there, Kelly Brandt,
she's your aunt. But you know what, there's a new aunt in town.
That's right, that's right? For uh? I think that was no.
I forgot anyway. Alicia asked Alane, Sarah's the fun? Oh,
Aaron is a dirty Sanchez. Jennifer get up. Sandra said, he's being
green, but it was easy for you to come to our zoom Yep.
Christa gets strapped and Stephanie's dinker Rinker was also there. Yes, what's up?
What's up? So? Yeah, had had an interesting Friday, Yes,
tell you about it? Yeah, so, uh, Friday morning the
last few days of the week. As I told you last week, Kaylin
Lynette, Friday was going to be some college decisions are coming right away,
So Friday was going to be Berkeley, right and Tuesday, as in today
that you're listening to the show is Santa Barbara and Wednesday's you see Okay,
Now Elbe has been feeling very stressed out, but as her mom, I
think I'm more stressed out. It's really, of course, really hard.
As you know last year hot on, I know, LB got denied every
college. I know. I repeat this to give but you have to understand
that Elbe's circle of friends all got into amazing schools, and it's just it
just it just ground her into the ground because she worked just as hard as
her friends. She had amazing grades. We know that she picked a major
that was impacted, which you know that college counselor I hired did not tell
me. I'm still mad, you know, I need to learn to let
that go. So Lbie watched as friend after friend got into these amazing schools
and then was like, oh, LB, I'm sorry. Yeah. And
then you know, Elbie actually sat in the car of one of her best
friends when the Berkeley and UCLA came out. Her friend's dream school was Berkeley,
and she was sitting in the car and she was just like, oh,
I knew I didn't get in, but like I watched her and she
was like, oh my god, I got in. Sorry LB. Anyway,
that's what I'll be dealt with last year. As you know, then
her boyfriend broke up with her ten days he left for school. What's a
girl did not have a good and does she talk to him by the way
at all? Ever? Yes? Oh okay, So this whole year has
been just a major shit show, as you know. And I'm you know
what, I am proud of this girl for I think somebody else like me
would have just been like fuck it, I don't care, like I don't
know. I don't know that I would have had the wherewithal to really try
my hardest at community college. I just think, I, well, that's
what happened to me. I didn't go to college, and then I just
couldn't apply myself. I went to two classes in community college. I know
we all know this already, but it's just like the motivation wasn't there as
I was working. Yeah, it was also different time like when I would
go it was time to go off after high school. Most of all of
my friends just went and got jobs. Like very few of us went off
to colleges. Some did and some didn't. So it wasn't like you know,
our kids where all their friends are applying and everybody's applying. Everybody's got
a college counselor to work with and shit like that, right, there was
no college counselors to work with back then. Same you know. So it
was like my you know, my parents told me the same thing, like
what do you like to do? What do you want to do? Do
you want to go to school? And school's not for me? Well,
what do you want to do? Go to work? You know. So
it was like that. It was different, you know for us. But
yeah, it's it's different now. Yeah, especially if you're just in with
a group of kids and they're all not only going to college but going to
great schools, right, and then you just feel like, you know,
I just know LB has been feeling like what is my life? You know?
Yeah. But and then she got you know, wait listed to Polly
Slow, which was you know, she just as you know, saw that
as a bad sign. But then she got into Irvine and that was amazing.
Now she has she remember that she went to go to Berkeley to visit
her best friend. She has two best friends at Berkeley, So my friend
Laura, my closest mom friend, her daughter who's been friends with LB their
whole lives. She's there too, so her her two of her closest friends
and she went to visit them and she had an amazing time. She's been
not wanting to dare to get her hopes up for UCLA and Berkeley because they're
impossible. They're the number one and umber number tied for number one public university
in the country. Anyway, and she doesn't have like a ton of extracurriculars.
I mean, she works, that's about it. Yeah, this whole,
this whole college time, John and I have fought ourselves to not be
those parents that are like, well, you know that would look good on
your college application, like maybe you should stick with this club, maybe you
should do that, you know, because you're a freaking' no I know.
So anyway, Friday we wake up and I could not get to sleep the
couple nights leading to Friday, and just because I was like, she's I
don't think she's going to get into Berkeley, but I don't want the disappointment
to just weigh her down so much that she just goes back into like feeling
depressed. And you know, I just was like, I need her to
still have hope for other schools. Right, So it's Friday, I'm whatever
at like twelve thirty. I was going to my friend's a little birthday gathering
for my friend that night, So I ask Elbie, do you want to
go with me to the mall to help look for a gift for her?
Spoiler alert, I didn't find anything for her. We all gave her gave
money to her favorite charity, huh, or really to our favorite charity,
and then told her that's now going to be our favorite charity. But I
thought i'd find like a little funny mug at Spencer's. Yeah. Do you
know this is a little side note? Do you know that everything in Spencer's,
all the jokes these days are just all pot oriented? Is it all
getting high every time? Is about like long? You know he's high as
fuck? Or really? It used to be my favorite store at that mall,
at the Tapega mall. Yeah, Oh my god, it used to
be my favorite store. And I used to like save up money to buy
posters and shit, yes, black light posts or black light post yes.
But I haven't been to one in a Spencer's in years. Oh, I
have gone regularly. Is it's at your mall? Yeah? And remember how
taboo it felt to go in there too, because it felt like there were
so many dirty jokes. Yes, and then like in the back of the
store, it's all like bridal shower stuff, sax stuff, you know,
but all the shirts are so inappropriate, right. I'll be bought herself a
shirt at Spencer's a few weeks ago that says smells like slut in here,
and she wears it all the time and it makes me laugh every time,
smells like slut in here. Oh my god, she's really funny. So
I go, oh, but you want to go to the mall with me
to like get your mind off things. She's like, yeah, okay.
So we're in the car and she's just like, oh, I'm just so
anxious, And I said, well, I know. I was like,
but you know, just keep your expectations really low, because you know,
it's the acceptance rate at Berkeley is very low, even for transfers. Anyway,
she was like, no, I totally know. But then here's the
thing. I am obsessively following Reddit stuff about transferring, and it's so it
feels awkward because it's all the kids that are posting there like oh my god,
I'm shitting myself like about today, like oh my god, if I
don't get into Berkeley, Like, I don't know what I'm going to do,
and I got waitlisted for Irvine? What do you would chance me?
So I have and to know that the decisions were coming out at three o'clock.
That's what everybody was saying. So Elbe's like, I don't the decisions
are supposed to come out like in the late afternoon, around four or five.
And I was like, and I don't want to be super cringe and'll
be like, well, according to Reddit, supposed to be three, right,
you know what I mean, because it's this is her journey. Yes,
yeah, But I was like, oh, really did you do?
You know that for sure? And she's like no, but that's what people
say, like late afternoon. And I was like, okay, because it
could be like three. Then I like, look away a little bit.
You can't see me doing that. But I'm like, it could be three.
I don't know. I mean, what do I know? I mean,
I do know it's three. Yeah, But anyway, so Elvie's like,
oh, is it it's three? Where'd you hear that? I read
it? I don't know, so I read it somewhere, you know I
read it? Read it? Yeah, somewhere somewhere. Yeah. So there's
this website called missus sun I think it's called, and a lot of you
know, my also obsession. I'm actually off of paying for college one oh
one. Oh okay, good. I don't follow it anymore, but every
once in a while I go look at it. But it's all they talk
about is FAFSA uh huh on there. So anyway, yeah, and then
if you say that, if you say your kid got into a college,
they're always like, move it over to the rear. To the roar.
Roar is where you're allowed to say what college your kid got into. So
anytime somebody's like, hey, decisions for session and such came out, my
kid got in, the admins are always like, you got to move that
to the returning off comments. Why there's just so so so stupid. So
parents find a way around that by going like, my kid got into you
know whatever school. But my question is, it's like it's trying to get
around the dators. We see you, I see you, right, or
move it over to the roar. Yeah yeah, you're only allowed and then
anyway, So whatever, I hate I hate paying for college one on one,
So I'll about Reddit yeah, okay, so wait, what's missus Sun.
So missus Sun is something that's that knows a lot about all the UC's
so, so missus Sun it's like a website if you if you google miss
missus Sun. There it's all about the UC system and it there's a lot
of information on there. But somehow's that website will tell you what the decision
dates are for most schools now they don't know one hundred percent, but like
Berkeley officially put it out that their decisions were coming out on Friday, but
they don't say what time. Okay, okay, So anyway, we go
to the mall Alb's like, Mom, I just oh so like distracted,
you know, like I totally get it, true, but I don't want
to make it about me. So I just I try to I try to
be a mom and not an obsessive freak like I'm feeling on the inside.
I try to just parent and go, yeah, I get it your journey
too, So like it. You know, I mean, you're her mom
my concern and it's her mental state. My concern is that, you know,
it's not even the disappointment I understand, Like listen, rejection is redirection
and all that shit, you know, But how much more rejection does this
could need right now? And my fear is getting these big rejections again,
Like if it didn't stop her motivation last year, I can't imagine what she
would do if she didn't get in anywhere now going into this SDSU. I
told you she got into that school and she got into Irvine, So we're
not all is not lost, like we're sitting in a good position. We're
happy, you know, but whatever, and she's still more decisions to go
and she didn't. You guys, never went to look at sdu So San
Diego. No. And we had kind of a a thing about it because
I really wanted her to go to SDSU. I thought if we went down
to SDSU on the accepted students day, she went to go see you see
Santa Cruz. As you remember last year, she didn't want to go to
school on a hiking trail. They made the drive. It's like a you
know, seven hour drive out there. But she didn't get into accepted students
day. It was too full already. So she had just a really boring
tour of the school where she felt like she was walking through a forest,
which she was and it just wasn't impressive. So I had it in my
mind like I got to get her to go to Accepted Students Day where it's
going to be tons of energy people from her department, Like I want her
to get psyched, you know, but she was like, I can't get
the day off work, you know. I think we in retrospect what was
going on is she's just very much like wanting to know what are my choices
and then I'll go CEUs depending on I don't want to drive all the way
to San Diego do this whole thing. If if I can help, if
I can go to somewhere that I really want to go. And I think
in her mind her top choice was U see Santa Barbara, where she got
where she was really hopeful for last year. She got waitlisted, she never
got off the waitlist. I think she thought that was an achievable school this
year, and if she got in there, she'd go, Okay, that
one comes out today when you're listening to this, and UCLA comes out tomorrow.
That kind of stay okay. So we come home from the mall,
it's like a little bit before three, and I'm like okay, bye,
and I go to my computer and I look at Reddit and it's like all
these posts are like, oh my god, countdown any minute now, you
know. Meanwhile Elb's going to check it like four or five, right,
But I get my own. I know better, but I don't want to
say anything. So it's at three o'clock. Right at three o'clock, somebody
goes, Davis is out. So you see, Davis was out. She
didn't apply there. So then somebody's like, oh my god, where's Berkeley.
Where's Berkeley? Now? It's like three oh two, and somebody else
says, uh, chill, They'll usually come out like a couple minutes after
three. So then I refresh again and somebody's like, Berkeley's out. My
heart starts beating like a hand. My heart's beating right now, just listening.
So I go, I go. I try to be cool, you
know, I go. I saunter into her room. I don't know if
saunter's the right word. I just like real casual, like, hey,
what's up? Just poke them my head and I was like, so Berkeley's
out. She looks at me, what did you? She doesn't know because
I'm trying not to be like I'm all over Reddit. I know, because
every time I do, she rolls her eyes at me. Yeah, and
I feel stupid, you know, like, mom, why are you so
obsessed with that? You know? Okay, So she's like it is Are
you sure? And I go, yep, I'm sure. So she goes,
oh my god, I'm so nervous. So she opens her computer.
She clicks on the thing for her portal that's where they update you. And
I'm sitting right next to her looking at her computer and she opens it up
and it says your application's under review, still under review, and she's like,
fuck, it's not. It does it's not? Can you go check?
Can you go see? Are you sure? So I'm like, okay,
I'll be right back. So I go back to my room, I
go boot back up the reddit page and then I see, you know,
now there's like ten comments, and a few of them are like I don't
see it. Mine's not updated. But a few of them are like I'm
in Oh my god, I'm crying, you know. And then uh so
I'm like fuck, so I so because my brain, my mind is like,
so, maybe they're telling the people who got in first, and then
the people who aren't, who aren't getting their results yet are because they're not
telling the rejections yet. So I screenshot what I'm seeing with the with the
trying to be upbeat, like, well, hey, not everybody's is updated
yet. So I screenshot that and I send it to her and then uh,
and then I go back in her room just to say like, hey,
all is not lost, like some people are still waiting for their results.
So she reboots, she refreshes her screen again, and she's like,
I don't have anything. And I'm like, well, do you see the
thing I sent you? And she's like, yeah, I'm looking at it
right now, and then she refreshes again and she goes, oh god,
I got it. Then fucking craziness ensued and I I don't think I've ever
been so fucking happy in my entire life. I was screaming at the top
of my lum. We started jumping up and down and hugging and ran into
the other room and Elbie was starts crying, and John's like, what's going
on? And Alway's like and she falls down on her knees and is just
like crying and like freaking out, and I was She's like, I gotta
tell my friends, and I was like, I gotta tell my friends more
importantly, and we both start like texting people because my friend Laura, whose
daughter is there, has been on the biggest pins and needles and she's I
was super happy for her daughter when she got in and she's was so I
think equally sad. It's like, it's happening to your own kid. Cool,
she's been in pain, so she's just been waiting and oh my god.
And then she was just like doing you know, like crying and still
yelling, and it felt like I felt like we were having a dream.
So she was super super excited. She was facetiming her friends and her friends
were freaking out. And then and then she had to go to work,
so she was leaving for work. I can't remember. So now it's like
three point thirty and she had to leave for work like in an hour.
So anyway, she's doing her makeup and all of a sudden, she comes
in and she's like, mom, you see San Diego. Decisions are out.
Now that's a really hard ucy to get into because you can't tag that
one. As I explained to you about the tag system, you it's one
of the top tier you sees as well, and she was like, oh
my god, I got a check, got into got into you see,
San Diego, and got into Berkeley in one day. While she's feeling so
much better. Thank God, this poor kid. Yes, and she would
go to Burke for sure before I think Santa Barbara. Yeah, but her
dream school is UCLA, so we're super happy and I think you'll go there.
I think, like, if she gets into UCLA, that's her massive,
massive dream and she's just praying. It's amazing. And remember that UCLA
has that special honors program that helps you get in and she didn't end up
in because the stupid counselor at school, yes, didn't specify how to sign
up for honors, right, she just told her, do do this class,
do this honors class. So she signed up for that class that she
was told to sign up for and it wasn't honors separate sign up. She
didn't know. So anyway, oh my gosh, that's such great news.
Like I had a feeling she was going to be she was going to get
in like you did. Yeah, I did not have a good feeling.
You're her mom and you're in the thick of it. But like she's a
good student, I know, but there are tons of kids are four point
zero students and they get rejected, like I mean, tons of kids with
better stats than Lbe got rejected from Irvine. So you know, yes,
she has stuff going for her. She has two associate's degrees that she already
made in one year. She looks like a go getter. But you just
don't know what they're looking for. But you know what, speaking of mental
health, yes, our show is sponsored by Better Help and we're so excited
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It's flexible. My kids are in therapy, which is a good time
for them to be in therapy. All three of my kids are in therapy,
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ten percent off your first month. That's Better Help. H e LP dot
com slash f c O l Oh. Yeah, that's awesome news. That's
so great, Kaitlin. Are you happy for me? I'm very happy for
you, specifically for you all about me. It's so hard to I mean,
I'm being funny about this, but it I have felt very self centered
about it because it's who's the one who has to pick up the pieces like
exactly you know me. It's very challenging to parent your kid when they're just
like, when their motivation has decreased, when they just feel, you know,
loads of rejection. You feel like you have to be a cheerleader all
the time, and it's so hard, and you know, it's just such
a fear to go. I don't know how much more right now. It's
it's so hard. Yeah, like the motivation. When you see their motivation
and their their spirits get crushed no matter what age they are, you know.
I remember when my kids were struggling when they were young, like you
know, in sixth grade, seventh grade, you know, and they you
know, just like not getting good grades and you know, and then well
they have to get we should get them on the IEP and then that helped,
you know, Like, but when they're not, when they're when you
see them legitimately trying and then they're still not getting anywhere at school and like
thriving or whatever, that's when their motivation gets crushed. And that's when us
as parents feel like we have to do something about it. You know,
it's like up to us to figure it out, you know, like these
little little helpless birdies, like they need to be helped, you know,
and we have to figure out their way. So yeah, it's it's it's
it's tough. It's a lot. When Sadie and Xander switch schools to the
to the large public school, and it was you know, and Sadie was
pretty traumatized. And then they had that mister Zippity Doo dah. Yeah,
day one, mister zippity DooDah, like wouldn't let them back in the classroom,
like the door locked. They went out to go find their locker or
whatever their first day and they were having trouble finding their classes and he was
just a dick to them and like enjoyed their humiliation. Both of them at
different times had work in tears. And then Sadie, who I had put
in honors classes, you know right away, was like drowning. You know.
That was just one of the worst times because I felt like, oh
my god, I did this to them, you know, I put them
in this. I kind of blame our listeners because a lot of our listeners
were constantly like, why don't you put your kids in your neighborhood public school.
That's how they're going to find their people that you know, put them
in the neighborhood school. They said it'll be great. They said it wasn't
fucking great. It was really one of the most traumatizing things that's happened to
both of them. Xander ended up finding his way, but Sadie was crushed.
And I really considered all of my options, one of them being like
homeschooling or because every single day she was crying, and you know how I
didn't even ask how school was because she was barely speaking, you know,
John and I just did not know what to do. That's that's when we
got her. Well, she was already in therapy at that time, but
that's when we ended up getting her medicated because she just was a shell of
herself. She was there was no joy. She would come home from school,
go in her room, shut the door, and just like either go
to sleep, you know, yeah, totally demotivated. I had to take
her out of all the honors classes, put her in all just regular classes
where she was not with any kids that were that were sort of like Xander
was starting to make a friend group, you know, Sadie would just kind
of follow him around at lunch. It was such a such a hard time.
And I have to say that when Elbie did not get into any schools
and was just going to go to community college and you know, stay home
and she was in her room a lot, I was like, oh no
again, I know, I know it's so sad. Yeah, but you
know it is like what makes you know, like resilience and learning, rejection
and all that, But it's like how much, yeah, like how much
can a kid take? You know it is? Yeah, I remember I
was homeschooled. I forgot about. Did I ever tell you I was homeschool
No, I think I did. I went to school with Jamie Fars.
Oh yeah, yeah son, yeah yeah, yes, yeah. You guys
had the little homeschooling community. Yes we did. And that your dad a
range. Yeah, My dad and like another parent and some like three parents
decided it was just me and like six other kids. Jamie Farr's son.
I remember they had a dog that was blind and deaf, and I was
like, what the fuck is this? How does this creature exist in my
Like I was probably I think I was like in it was my fifth grade
year or sixth grade. I had something like that, and I hated it.
It was like I was at home, like I wanted to be at
school with my friends. So you guys didn't go to each other's houses.
We went to what they never we went to Jamie Farr's house. It was
just always at that house and I would just get dropped off in picks.
So was your dad friends with Jamie Farr or was he friends with somebody that
was friends with Jamie Farr? Something like that. I don't know. I
don't I have no idea how it became about, but I just remember it
was the worst year. I just hated it because I was like, what's
real? Like all I cared about was recess and lunch and like socializing,
and there was only like the same six kids, you know, every day,
day in and day out, and it was just like ugh, you
know. But I got through with that year, and then I went to
like Columbus Junior High in Canoga Park, Oh. Then I went to the
high school or junior junior high, and then in eighth grade, my dad
took me out of that and sent me to the the the alternative school,
the Magnet School. Now, did you have friends at the junior high?
Yes, I did. My girlfriend that lived on the street with me,
Wendy, Like she was my best friend, and we went to that together.
And then I didn't want to leave that highst that junior high. I
wanted to go. I was supposed to go to Canoga Park High School that
was my high school, and it was no good back then, and my
dad was like, no, you need to go to like a magnet school
and van eyes it's artsy, it's this and that theater and then you know,
and that's what my kids school is like, yeah, yeah, but
so then yeah, but that was like my kids school. Literally, my
kids high school is probably the same as your high school was back then.
Really yeah, literally, only a few hundred kids the whole school. Yeah,
and everybody was busting drama. Yeah. Well there's no busting at ours
because it's not a magnet, it's a charter. But you know, they're
all about the drama department, the music department. They have poetry competitions,
they have Shakespeare competitions, they have you know, all the art. Yeah,
a lot of that photography we had. Yeah, my photography class was
fun. But no sports. No, we don't have that either. No
sports, which was fine with me because I didn't play sports, right,
but see, my kids were kind of bummed about the no sports. But
I'm like, what sport are you going to play? Like, they're not
going to play a sport right right, It's just there's no like Friday night
football game right right. But because other schools in the area that they can
go to those kids games if they want to write, which we did because
that school that I went to was next door to Birmingham School, so we
would always go to Bird. That's how I met Mike Gerstein and Glenn and
those guys because they went to Birmingham. Okay, yeah, yeah, Birmingham's
right by my house. Yeah. So you know the Magnet School I'm talking
about that. Oh yeah, of course, yeah, yeah, yeah,
the Valley Alternative School. Yeah, Alternative Magnet School. Yeah, they have
a mural out there, like sure do. Yeah, it's the same.
It's the same. To go drive by it. I know, I haven't
seen it in so long. It's the same. We used to use that
school. So, you know, the choices in LA. If you want
to get your kids into Magnet school, you have to you have to apply
to certain schools. So everybody applies to one that they know they can't get
into, and it's that school, a Valley Alternative Magnet. It's such a
small school that they don't have enough spots. So what you do is you
apply to that when you get turned down, and then you get points so
that you start accruing points, and if you have a certain amount of points,
it's easier to get into. So, like let's say you want to
go to SOSA, which is Sherman Oaks Center for enriched studies. That's a
big that's that's like a medium sized school that a lot of kids want to
go to. It's a magnet. If you want to go there for high
school, you just you just apply to a schools year after year after year
that are going to say no, and then you'll have a bunch of points
that will hopefully get you in when your kids in high school. Interesting,
that's interesting. And then we called our teachers by their first names. Did
your did your kids do that? No? No, it's a little more
traditional. But because it's not, it's not supposed to. Our school is
not supposed to be an alternative school. It's a it's supposed to be a
school for that the chart, you know how charters are built on something.
Our kids school is built on getting kids into college. Literally like a college
prep school. They're all about they have their own college counseling system and they
do they do tons of workshops and they like they're training these kids up to
get them into a good college, nice or a college that's right for them.
Right. But when I was a kid, my elementary school was like
your high school. Like my high school called everybody. We called it open
structure. So They didn't separate you into grades, separated by grades. It
was just a big pool of kids. You you know, you'd be in
this math level, you'd be in this reading group, you'd be in this
social studies class, and we are. We called our teachers by their first
names. It was Becky, Charlotte and Shelley as our English teacher. And
we all learned about like all the different we had Ethnic studies, We learned
about Kwanza, we learned yeah, yeah, lots of stuff about slavery.
Yeah, the Republicans would hate it. It was like a baby version of
critical race theory we learned about, you know. And that's how my school
was super integrated because our school was the alternative to bussing. Yes, so
when they were bussing back in the seventies, a bunch of the parents were
like, we don't, we don't need to do that. We have an
all black school, which I went to. You know how Howard Stern talks
about having gone to an all black school. I went to one. There
were like two white kids in the whole school. I was one of them.
There was me, and there was one Asian girl, and I believe
there was one other white student and you learn how to dance, yes,
right, yes, yeah, just love to try to dance. I know
they'd be like, I remember this one day, they were like, do
the running Man, Now do this, now do the do the sprinkler,
and then they go do the white girl dance. And then they go,
oh that's just yell every day thing. You don't need to do the white
girl dance. You know the white girl dance? Yes, yes, yes,
but yeah. We would have dances on Fridays just for fun, like
just I loved it you did. Yeah, oh my god, like that's
where all those that's those muse those songs that uh that we would play that
that we were talking about on our show a couple Yeah, you know,
like yeah, Egypt, Egypt, you know, like all that stuff all
like after school Friday's dance party. It's like somebody would DJ and everybody,
the teachers would hang out. Yeah. So our school didn't have bells and
none of that. Right, we did what a lot of field trips to
Alvera Street and same downtown and went there. Yeh yeh, I love that.
I know. I loved it too. I remember because I I remember
getting a churo at al Vera Street they would get it. So our school
was super small. It was the same as your It was on the campus
of another school, and your school was on the campus of Birmingham. Our
school is one of it was next next door. Yeah, but and it's
grades kindergarten through twelfth. Oh. Your school was Magne. Yeah, our
Valley alterna school. Oh, I think it still is. Okay, Well,
our school was just an elementary school. But when I was at the
all black school, which was called Crescent Heights Elementary School. So where I
lived, if you traveled like a few blocks south of me, it was
all black neighborhood. If you traveled a few blocks north of me, it
was all white, like Jewish carried Jewish neighborhood over in West la By like
Pico and Robertson. Yeah, but then south of Los Sienaga was all black.
So when I was really little, like kindergarten and first and half of
second grade, I was at the all black school. I got beat up.
I got it was. It was not a good situation because being and
you know, my heart goes out to anybody who's African American who's in white
spaces all by themselves all the time, like you know, I I know
what that's like in reverse, and it's not fun. You know, it's
not fun. And especially in those days, there was a lot of like
racial unrest. There was a lot of you know, kids that were angry,
and I got a lot of like I got called honky every day.
They called me a honky, and they wouldn't let me get a drink of
water. Sometimes they wouldn't let me in the bathroom. You know. So
this school, this other school. This was around the time that integration,
forced integration was happening. So, like I said, there was this all
like white school and all these you know, do gooder parents, very liberal
parents in California, were like, let's take kids from Crescent Heights and kids
from this Canfield school and put them together and we'll have our own school.
So it was on the campus. They did it for different years on different
campuses, so that ours was on the campus of Canfield the little bungalows,
so they're just a couple of bungalows for all the kids. But it was
great. I mean, I loved that. And what was that for?
That was like pretty even was that junior high that you know that was elementary
school? So that ended up being third, fourth, fifth, and sixth
grade, Okay. And then I moved to Spokane, Washington, Okay,
and went to junior high there, and then I did half of high school
there and then the other half of high school in Springfield, Massachusetts, and
then I moved back to California. Wow, Massachusetts for basketball Hall of Fame.
Yeah Springfield Yeah Wow, Okay, Range, I know we need to
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Boom love it. You know. Speaking of shape, I have to tell
you that this is always I've said this before many times. We're bored.
But I stopped eating sugar. I go to the gym. But like I
really set my expectations of myself low. I'm telling you this is the key
to getting in shape. Yes it is. I have lost some weight.
I don't know if you can tell I have lost some weight I fit into
small my getting getting smaller clothes. But I really eat pretty much what I
want, and sometimes I pig out, like yeah, I went out to
dinner the other night for my friend's birthday, and I ate a ton of
like fried food. I don't, I don't care, but I try.
But no sugar at all, no dessert, no candy, because you know
I will just eat that all day long. Yeah. And then when I
go to the gym, I go. I do thirty minutes of cardio.
I don't try to be a hero like I don't. Even if I could
raise the tension on the Precorp machine, I don't. Yeah, I do
it ever so slowly, like I've gone up one since I started. Just
do thirty minutes, stretch out a little bit, do a couple of machines
for weights, and then I'm like done. None, have a good day.
I don't take classes where I know I'm going to be like you know
I now you know I am. This is my key, my suggestion,
don't work that hard. Yeah, just a little bit, like just get
moving. Yeah. I started working out with so Suzanne's ex husband. I
introduced them right and he was he was working I joined twenty four hour fitness
like eight I don't know how many years ago, like twenty five years ago,
and and he was the like I was. I was sold. I
remember buying the package because they said I would get like a personal trainer for
the first week I was there or whatever. And so when I show up,
I was kind of like Helen Paradise, like where's my where's my personal
trainer? You know? And I was like, I was told. I
was sold on a stupid membership. I only joined because I wanted a personal
trainer. Where is he? And then Carlos walked. I was like,
take it easy, take it easy. He's like, I'll train you.
So he trained me. And then I told Suzanne. I was like,
you gotta check out twenty four hours. They're doing this deal and you'll get
Carlos the trainer. And so then she joined, and then her and Carlos
ended up getting married. They oh my god, yeah, and then they
got married. Then they had Gracie and then they got divorced, and you
know, so he would work out me and Suzanne back then. So now
like I'm talking to Suzanne recently and hot, I'm like one of his best
friends passed away. Unexpectedly. Oh yeah, yeah. It was really sad.
And so I could be asking like, how's how's he doing? How's
Carlos doing? And it wasn't just his best friends, one of his big
clients that he would train, and Suzanne's like, you know, and I
would be at the condo and I kept going like, I gotta, you
know, figure out, I gotta find a gym around here, I gotta
find some classes to take something. And She's like, why didn't I even
think of this before. She's like, Carlos lives like right up the street
from you in an apartment building. In his building is a gym that he
trains his clients out of. She's like, why don't you go work out
with Carlos? And I was like, oh shit, okay, So I
started working out with him, and I started once a week, like listen,
I'm not trying to be a hero. You know, I'm only here
a couple of days a week, so you know, when I'm in the
neighborhood, I just want to to get a good work eat. And my
god, did he work me my Like, like ye, my face was
like bright red, I'm out of breath. But the good thing about Carlos
is. I can be like, dude, relax like I'm tired, like
and he would be like, oh, come on, just give me five
more, five more, come on, you can do it. You can
do it. Five more fun. See I hate that. Yeah, I
don't mind it. I don't mind it. Listen to a lot of people
like that. Yeah, so I hate it. Yeah, I'm just like,
no, I don't want to feel like this. This is not I
want to work out here. Here's why I like to work out. I
like to do the least, but then still have that feeling like I took
a half a Xanax afterwards. It gives you that calm, like calm brain,
and then I feel like, oh okay, I feel like settled and
calm. It's like it's like when people meditate. I don't like meditating.
I like listening to a podcast right and exercising fairly slowly. You are least.
I don't ever get super out of breath. I mean sometimes a little
bit. But yeah. What else telling everybody's you don't have to, No,
you don't have to. But what I'm telling everybody is, don't work
out with Carlos. But yeah, but I'm with you. But But the
thing is is when I started working out with him, I told him I
don't want to be worked out hard. I just want to get in shape.
I don't want to be like and next thing, you know, he
tricks you. He'll just be like, Okay, get on the treadmill for
twenty minutes, and then after that we'll just do a little easy weights here
and there. But like, the stuff that I'm doing is not even with
weights. I'm on the So the one thing that I had nightmares about,
which is I'm he makes you lay on your stomach and it's like Superman,
right, So you put your arms out like you're flying in the air.
You're laying flat on your stomach. But he wants you to raise your figs
and raise your upper body, your upper chain and keep your arms straight.
Hell, that's the hardest fucking thing in the world for me in the world.
Like, look, I'm not joining the military, right, I'm just
trying to like lose a pant size, right, you know, Yes,
we got all go down a little bit. Yeah, But you know,
for me, I don't want to make goals. I don't fitness goals,
I know, but for me, I get like my upper body is like
very weak, and so I'm like hunched over and you know with the big
boobs and everything, and it's like, you know, I'm I'm trying to
have like a better pasture, not so my back isn't hurting all the time.
And he's like, well, you want to get a stronger back,
this is the way to do it. But like after that, I'm out
of breath, I'm exhausted, I'm tired. And then I was like,
I'm going to kick it up. I want to go, like so now
I'm going to start going I think two days a week. Look at you,
Yeah, but we'll see. Well, I feel like I'm forty now,
so I do want to get in better shape. You know, now
that you're forty. Yeah, it's like, you know, that's when things
start sliding a little bit. So I want to like, you know,
cut that off. But listen, you know what I want to talk about
right now. I want to talk about our our fifty dollars a month subscribers.
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all right, thanks everybody. Thank you. Kaylen, you're a parent
now, don't have it up. It's good. Let angels