Hello, everyone, Welcome back to the Fire Escape Cast. I'm Mike.
It's Monday. Is it February yet? I got a January thirtieth, So
tomorrow is January thirty first, and then Wednesday, February first? Is it's
episode forty seven. That's Dan. Hi, Hello, that's Mary. You
sound like my parents when they send me a voicemail. My parents are the
last people on earth that when they call and I do not answer, they
will put in a voicemail and they will say, hey, Mary, it
is Tuesday, seven pm. This is your mom trying to call you,
and I'm not able to get ahold of you. Give me a call back
when you get this. Yeah, And they give me all the information that
the phone gives me. Do they give they text? Are they texters?
They are becoming better texters, But their preferred method of delivery is telling me
the information of the date and the time on my voicemail. That tells you
all that, yeah, you know what I need to They could just hang
up and you would know who it was and when they called, and that
you should get back to them. They want me to know that it is
I think they like to look at their watch when they do it. It
is uh seven pm Thursday. We're just trying to get a hold and then
they'll tell me stuff that I know. Right, I was just calling you
to catch up. You weren't available. Give me a callback. These are
all things that I missed. Call tells me crocod Crocodiles have shorter snouts than
alligators. But the teeth there's two rows and then yeah, but it's about
eight fifteen now, Um, just wondering when you're gonna call me back,
factory. Did you know there are Did you know there are fifteen cities in
China with populations over five million? Are your parents a page of day calendar?
Just a little trivia fact. I love page of day calendars. I'm
a big mark for the smarlways at the fireside ones. In my teenage years,
I had sports illustrated swimsuit ones. I had joke ones. Yeah I've
gone through it. Had a Garfield one back in the day. But yeah,
they don't give me except the Yeah, it'd be cool if they gave
me a little factoids. You know, the Burge Khalifa, tallest building in
the world. Call me back. We had a coach in in wads class
in high school that had a page of day vocab calendar, and every day
he tried to like shoehorn the word of the day in and it was just
so goddamn obvious, where it's just like, all right, this big dumb
ass, there's no way he was saying this word with more than three syllables,
and he's not using it right, he's not pronouncing it right. That
deadlift was a tokthinus bronic. Oh nice. Those push ups were sacra sanked.
Actually, I would probably say that if a Jim Bro said that to
me, I'd be fucking amped and do another fifty. You're accused me of
saying slang. I've talked last time about how I'm not cool enough to do
slang. I described one of my punch out runs is I had a really
clutch like round one win on Don Flanco two is clutch slang. Yeah,
I would say that's like young millen or that's like millennial slang for sure.
Wait, no, I feel like I always heard that from like nineties baseball,
being like, oh, jip Or Jones is a real clutch pitcher.
No, no, no, no, clutch pitt in baseball is an actual
like that's like a lingo for baseball, But the way that millennials started using
it was like that's clutch, like good save, or like, oh that's
awesome, you really came through with that gatorway when I'm hungover, that's clutch,
Like oh, I wasn't trying. Yeah, literally speaking, literally speaking
in baseball, it means exactly what it sounds like. But baseball they use
it as an actually clutch, clutch hitter, that was a clutch, you
know whatever. And for the record, that's the that's how I'm using it,
that's the context. I'm not trying to be a cool millennial. I'm
trying to use it as an old baseball term. Yeah, because then people
were also saying that you say, like shoot and mark and that's the industry
karni shit lingo, that's fucking I guess technical back like nineteen twenties carnivals.
This is not cool kids stuff. Yeh, shoot and work in kabe.
I would take industry talk. Technically, lingo jargon could like be seen as
a form of slang within a specific community, but I still wouldn't consider them
like worldwide slang in the way that slang And I think like this is what
the kids today are saying yeah, and I'm never going to do that.
I'll use my industry terms, I'll use my old baseball terms, but I'm
not going to say anything that the hip kids and the millennials. Wait,
millennials aren't hip kids anymore. I'm a millennial whatever today. I think most
of our listeners are millennials too. Listeners. I wonder, we're going around
the clock again, and now we're at jen A. You're double A,
double A then double B. Yeah, we're on the same page. Wait,
I wonder if we have any gen Z. What is jen Z?
They're like, they're like young twenties, mid twenties. And the kids today,
aren't they they're college ish? Yeah, yeah, because one baby,
there's one. There's one under gen Z that's like in high school. I
believe what are they? I don't know. Supposedly this is these are all
just like marketing things that are made up to sell shit and to blame people
in news articles. It makes yes, it makes thing. It's the millennials.
We know, that's no it is. I've never liked my generation.
I've always preferred older people. When I was a kid, I always associated
with old folks. You've ever talked to people in class or anything, because
they all listened to the hip music of the early nineties, and I was
listening to my old stuff. Like I never liked you. You two folks
are fine, but yeah, you know, thank you. Maybe you're like
a combo. You're a moomer. You're a half millennial, half boomer.
I don't think any part of me is young. It wouldn't gen there's a
generation body of an old aged millennial, but the soul and rugged anger of
a boomer. I go to physical therapy three times a week. I got
nothing young about me, speaking of I'm very curious. You told Mary and
I last Friday, or actually, like I don't know, last Friday,
before this recording, that I'm going off the grid. I won't be able
to talk until Sunday evening. Uh talk to you then, And alarm bells
went off in my head because that's a very mysterious thing to say before you
get You said I'm going off the grid specifically, like I can I read
it out loud if I find it anyway, continue and then I'll read it
well if I can find it. Yeah, So here's why I was off
the grid and unreachable last weekend. Nothing crazy here, but you know,
I'm i ever, never ending quest to just remove myself from the Internet and
you know, the modern just bullshit of the Internet and all that stuff and
social media. I read a lot of books about like digital digital minimalism and
stuff like that, and like just you know, ways to come back way
and what this shit's doing to our brains and we're the first to grow up
the Internet and we're all fucking we don't have attention spans and blah blah blah.
So as I've read, I've probably read ten plus books about like specifically
this topic. I try to read anything recently written about this topic. Um,
a name kept coming up, and it was Henry David Throw. Yes,
go on, I know who he is. Waiting for dramatic effects.
No, I was just laughing at Mike, laughing because well it's it.
That's like, yeah, I knew he wouldn't expect Thorrow to come up,
and that that's why I was gone left Throw and Ralph Henry, Yeah,
I've heard of both of these very famous writers and thinkers and philosophers. Did
not really until I started reading all these books about like, hey, fuck
the Internet. Um, and they keep bringing up Walden Pond. Yes,
okay, yeah, a philosophy course. Oh okay, all right. So
for the listeners who maybe you don't know, I guess, I guess he's
famous. But if you don't know, he like in the eighteen hundreds,
when like factories and shit and industrialization or whatever was happening, he was like,
dah, that's probably unhealthy. I'm gonna move out to the fucking woods
for a couple of years. And so he moved out to a pond and
he built a cabin, and he just fucking like he didn't like ruugh it.
He was going into town in Concord, Massachusetts, and he was doing
all this other stuff and everything. He had visitors and all that shit.
He just wanted to step away from the ever busying world around him. In
the eighteen hundreds, he started valid for our listeners exactly. Yes, So
he did it for two years and just kind of lived in a cabin and
wrote a book called Walden about he's talking about looking at the ice and fucking
like how to build a cabin and how much money you need to survive for
a year and stuff like that, and just really like boiling life down to
the essentials and all that stuff, and you know, just I don't finding
himself whatever now. And every time I read about this, I'm like,
man, that sounds fascinating, that sounds that what a cool idea. I
liked that, and so I took inspiration from that. I booked a cabin
in the Catskills and I went solo. I bought Walden, and I bought
a collection of Ralph Waldo Emerson essays. I left all my electronics at home.
I made sure I picked a cabin that did not have there's no TV,
there's no anything. And I brought my phone for GPS and emergencies and
music, and I just went up there and I spent a whole weekend by
myself. I fucking made a fire and just stared at it. It turns
out you just stared at a fire and it's fire, looks cool as hell,
and listened to you know, like it was. I got a bottle
of wine. I fucking read Walden. It was great, amazing. I
fucking loved it. But it was so interesting too, because like I brought
a puzzle, like a thousand piece of puzzle, and I was putting that
together on the floor of a cabin and stuff by myself. It was just
it was fun as hell. And one thing I did do and I asked
bon because this was antithetical to kind of what I was trying to do.
I had a friend who lived up in New Pault's, New York, which
is kind of not too far from it. I was, I don't get
to see him often I worked with them, or a good friend of mine
Alex, and uh. I was like, well, I'd love to see
him while'm up there. I don't get to see him very often. And
you know it's I figured, well, the point was to unplug. It
wasn't to not talk to human beings. And even like the Row, you
know, met with people and stuff. So I was like, okay,
well I will use my phone to call an uber to New Pauls and I'll
meet up with him. But I called the uber at the second I get
it. First of all, I had to make that I was staying on
like this giant farm and I had to make this like uber come down this
long farm road. And I seemed like a fucking serial killer, Like it
was just completely dark, just pitch black. He's going down like an unpaved
like gravel road. And I'm just like waving a light for him to see
it. I'm sure I look completely insane. But so the second I got
in the uber, I turned off the phone entirely. It's like, all
right, that's it. I called the uber. I won't turn on my
phone again and tell if I need to get a ride home, you know.
And so he takes me there, but the guy will get the New
Pauls. And the guy can't find the restaurant or the bar that we're going
to, and so I was like, I'll find it. I get out,
and I'm like, oh fuck. I would normally just I reached for
my phone to like Google Maps and walked in and I was like, wait,
no, I gotta stick to my guns here. So I'm just in
New Pauls. I've never been there before. By stars to termining what North
based on the constellation leaves yeah out And so I'm walking around. I don't
see this fucking place anywhere, and I just like stop a girl on the
street and I'm just like, hey, do you know where this bar is?
And she's like, oh, yeah, it's down there. It's past
SuDS or snugs or something. I was like, I don't know what the
fuck that is? But I'm not gonna bug her, and so I start
walking in the direction, still can't find the place, not gonna pull out
my phone. I'm like, okay, I'm gonna walk into a liquor store
here, and I'm gonna like, where's this place? That? Like,
it just felt like such an old thing to do. I've never had to
like stop into places or stop people in the street and ask about where something
is eventually found it and everything. But like, you don't really realize how
often we use I mean, obviously we use our phones a lot, but
it's like, Okay, the food was on a menu, but the drink
menu was a QR code thing, and so then it's like, well,
fuck now, if I'm doing this thing, I gotta be the annoying friend
who it's like, Alex, can I can I see your phone after you're
done? And I want to pull my thing out. It's just like,
it's kind of crazy how much you have to use that. I stuck my
guns. He gave me a ride back to the farm and everything, but
yeah, I just fucking hung out there. I had a night where I
was like, okay, I bought a bottle of wine. I'm just gonna
kill this bottle of wine and read in bed all night, and it was
like, this is the most middle aged dad fucking night ever where I started
out a fire for like an hour drinking and then I laid in bed with
Walden and I poured my first glass of wine and I put on Miles Davis
What this is? They? Did you wine? And Miles Davis reading Walden
in bed? Did you get a did you get a sleeve tattoo as well?
Are you just trying to become me? Oh? Oh yes, I
was thinking of this entire time, because it's like I didn't give you any
indication of what I was doing. Yeah, I had. It wasn cling
that it might be something like that. Okay, yeah, after recent news
and everything. Sure, sure, Yeah, well actually I booked it a
few weeks ago and then yeah, turned out to be really four two at
a time in because stuff happened like the day before. We're yeah, let's
get away from the I didn't see any of the aftermath. It could be
really good for you. I we did something similar are right before the last
presidential election. Oh yeah, and I actually think we both we kind of
just like mentally were like I'm gonna not wanna like be around people or look
at the internet. And so we booked the tiny house like in the middle
of nowhere and kind of just like got away. Um. I had a
similar getaway as well. My mother invited me to her retirement community in Florida
for the week, and I spent my last week in the Villages. Have
you guys ever heard of the villages? Jerry's parents live in Seinfeld. Compare
it to that. It's a bit crazier than that, because the concept of
the villages is a community where you have to be fifty five to have a
house, and it has like a fob so that people who come and go
in the villages are all fifty five or up. The median age is seventy
two. And your house comes with like fees that allow you to partake in
all of these community events that happen every day. It's like camp but for
old people, and you could go do water aerobics, or it comes with
all the golf you'd ever want to play, and there's like a bunch of
different golf places to play at, and there's put putt and there's game.
I went to the gaming rooms. It was really funny. Yeah, there
was one. Uh there was a gaming center had you know, the electronic
basketball, like an arcade basketball. Uh, it had a foosball, it
had um oh, I don't forget what these are called, but it's got
those little pucks and sam and you slut shuffle board shod yeah, table shuffleboard.
They had that too in a different place. You know, all the
classic old people stuff. Oh, and they had arcade machines that just had
preloaded like three hundred old school games on them. So I played like you
know, Galagha. Of course I played Frogger, got my name on the
board on Frogger, as you do. And uh, I basically hung out
with these people. I was allowed to visit, but you are not allowed,
Like you couldn't own a place there even if you wanted to. And
then every night at the town Square they would have a band play and all
these like older people would come out and get their little two for one beer
wine from the special and then they would dance to this old school band.
It's kind of like they call it Disney for a like for old people,
it's essentially Disney World, but it's only like for retired people. That sounds
awesome, Like honestly, like that sounds like a great way to spend your
Joe. Look, I went in there laughing about it, because you do
research on it, you'll find all these like really funny facts. Right,
it has the highest is very high std rate because all these old people are
fucking yeah, and everybody's like super old. So like as you can imagine,
like it's just a very strange environment to be walking around and everybody's like
seventy oh, and I'm sure there's a lot of widows and widowers and they're
just a lot oh boy, yeah, you know, like you know,
pregnancy isn't an issue at that point, so everyone's just going for it.
Right. Then ask a stupid question, yeah, oh god, is this
about menopause? I think I think I know the answer to this for the
record, but I went into my head is like, I know it's dangerous
to have kids over like thirty four or whatever, but like, can you
could like an eighty year old lady get pregnant? It's just super dangerous.
I think it's extremely unlikely because you are set with a certain amount of eggs.
Oh right, and you run out and okay, um, while there's
like recorded precedence of like forty five year old women having babies. I think
even like up to like fifty, and if you freeze your eggs, right,
like I could freeze my eggs and then have them implanted in me,
that would possibly even have me go into it later. At the point of
like fifty, you are pushing your body. Um, you know, science
can only go so far. I think if it was seventy, right,
that doctor would have to be a pro. So they're just not using protection
because they're not going to get anyone pregnant, but they're getting there's definitely no
eggs left at that point. Yeah, Like most people go through menopause way
before that, so I don't think so you guys probably got the old the
old v v oh yeah yeah yeah, I think a lot of them.
This is old school, right, Like that's probably before a lot of men
get vasected me as you should. Um, but like especially us, especially
especially if you're not gonna, like if you don't want children, because it's
so much less invasive on you than it is on the on the woman,
Like getting your tubes tied is like really difficult and hard on like a woman's
body. You don't even get put under for it. That's the park concerns
me. Yeah, well they just my friend had it done and he said
that they numb you. You don't feel it, and then you sore for
like two days. Yeah, two by four of the head knocked me silly,
you know, just fucking knock me out. In what kind of hospital
do you go to the right one? Hello, I'm the anesthesiologist. To
be unconscious for anything medical, anything I don't just medical is done. We're
talking about the rehabilitation. So the procedure is done for me. But you're
growing has been sure cooked. I've surely told the story about my dad after
he's protect me and trying to jump over the thing in the parking garage and
god, yeah, yeah, okay, yes, yes, Dan, I
think you were thinking of I think, for on average, if a woman
every year above thirty five, for the average woman that you have a baby,
I think the chances of complications in the baby, like down syndrome for
instance, increase. Every woman is different. I think thirty five is like
the average age of that. From my understanding, it's really great just never
having to worry about this because we're not having kids, so I don't have
to think about it. I don't have to know about it. Abuts not
as a dude, I'm saying as a couple who's not getting you're not having
kids. It's just like we just don't have to think about this at all.
It's not like, whoa fuck the clock's sticking, you know, It's
like it just doesn't cross our minds. Ever. So, do you ever
like think about retirement and what ideal retirement? Because here's what going to the
village is really kind of where it resonated with me is that I've never considered
what happens when I'm fifty five, Like that is future Mary. I don't
even consider what's supposed to go down. But walking around and seeing all these
like pretty old people, and like when you're like sixty, like upper sixty
seventies, not everybody's like super mobile. No, but even with their like
walkers and canes and with their like everything that they needed to keep mobile,
they were dancing, they were like double fisting wines. They were like talking
to women, And I was like, I do want to live like that?
When I'm like, like, don't. I don't want to die when
I'm sixty five. I want to like live my whole full life, and
I think what was inspiring about the villages is like it's a silly place,
but I'm really grateful that they're like out there doing shit. And it's the
first time in my life I ever thought what do I want to do when
I'm sixty five? Like when I retire? What do I where am I
going to go? Yeah, And honestly, that is something that I've kind
of been thinking about the last couple of weeks because it's like I have been
having like a lot of fucking issues with my neck and stuff and see an
X rays and it's like, oh man, I'm kind of fucked up physically
right now and thinking about like, Okay, well, I'm glad I'm addressing
this at thirty eight because I've been thinking a lot about like, fuck,
if I'm in this batter shape, it's just fucking structurally at thirty eight,
I need to fucking do shit now. So when I'm fucking seventy, I
am not just completely you know, immobile and things like that, so you
know, I'm doing things. I got a standing desk, you know,
I'm doing the physical therapy three times a week and all that stuff. So
I'm trying to make the chance I can, but it's like it's fucking hard.
I've been able to get on the peloton or anything for this whole month.
I got that COVID the first couple weeks of January, and then i
had the pinch nerve also at the beginning of January. So I've been in
like physical, fucking severe pain and sick for the whole month. So I'm
over the COVID now and I think I'm starting to get better with the next
stuff. But like, man, it's just like again, I'm thirty eight,
and I've talked to all these doctors about like they ask what my job
is and stuff, and I'm like, listen, it's it ain't great as
far as like posture, and like I spend a lot of time in this
fucking chair and playing video games. You know, I do it all day
during the day, and I'm streaming at night or podcasting at night, like
I'm sitting a lot, and they're all like, yep, that'll do it,
So yeah, something to think about for sure. And spurs and fucking
spinal stenosis and vertebrae they're trying to fuse together and all sorts of shit,
and it fucking hurts. I don't want to live like this, you know,
Yeah, next stuff sucks, it sounds I don't. I don't know
if your's a spinal or muscular both. Yeah, I've slipped a disc in
my I mean I've fractured my tailbone, which is obviously the other end of
the spine. But I mean that was no walk in the park. But
I've slipped a disc in my like between my shoulder blades a couple of times.
It sucks. Yeah, like for like the recovery too, Like you
have to You're like Batman before he gets that new suit in Dark Night that
can help him turn. I specifically brought up Michael Keaton Batman in my physical
therapy. It can't turn normally because it's it's spinal and it's muscular. Because
because my neck so fucked up, my upper back, Yeah, my upper
back muscles have had to basically hold my head up. And so because they've
been taking all this undue stress, it's fucking knotted up. And it is
like everybody who's touched my back and the last few weeks has been like oh
shit. And my neck is fucked up too, so it's like it's all
bad. Up here, so I have a I like for doing what we
do or like, I mean, I don't know a lot of different professions
just sit at desks in front of computers all day. But I got that,
like, I don't know, it looks like kind of a detective's holster
thing they put on my shoulders back. You try to use that at least
a couple of times a week. Stuff. You do it over the shirt
or under it, because like it's itchy. If it's under I do it
over A short ideal, I'll just put like a flannel on over that.
Got it okay to cover it up? Like because people have seen it,
be like, what is they think it's a bit it looks weird. Yeah,
but I just stay in the house. I guess I don't know why
I'm worried about that. I do have to ask Dan, as someone who
kind of often will scoff. I know you're you're not like a verse completely
a verse to highbrow stuff, but like, what did you think of Not
that Walden's specifically highbrow, but what did you think of Walden? I loved
it and I haven't finished it. I thought I would. Well, so
here's the thing I thought that night. I was like, I'm kill this
bottle of wine. I'm gonna read this whole fucking book, because like,
here's the thing. I and I was already you know, a good I
was like one hundred pages in or something, and there's like three hundredth pages
there. I'm gonna finish tonight, and I'm no stranger to staying up super
like, God damn this, sorry, audio listeners. I have a new
camera and if I hold my hand up, it activates tracking and I'm gesturing
a lot and then my camera starts yes, yes, um. So anyway,
I lay down in bed day Mike late ast fuck, I will stream
and till the fucking sun comes up. I will stay up, like after
we record this tonight, we'll probably finish around midnight, and then I'll fucking
I'll play games and watch Tonight's a w and all this stuff like, I'll
be up till two, three, four in the morning. And so I
thought, no problem, I'm going to read this whole fucking book tonight and
drinks the bottle of wine. I poured half a glass of wine. No,
no, no, I poured a glass of wine, drank maybe half
of one glass, and fell asleep in bed with Miles Davis playing with a
book on my chest. I it's never fucking fallen asleep unintentionally in my life.
Really, Like I fucking like I never understood like if I'm watching a
movie with someone they fall asleep. I've never been able to do that because
I think I just have so much energy all the time. But my hypothesis
here is, since my day wasn't filled with like NonStop playing games and being
on the Internet and different things in stimuli and all that stuff, I think
I just had a normal day where I was just doing normal, non digital
things, and I think my body was just ready. It's like, well
it's like midnight, Yeah, you're gonna fall asleep nowt Like I've never done
that before. Well, blue light itself also can break havoc on your sleep
sleep yeah yeah, so it's like that's kind of my theory is that,
like, well, fuck, I just fell asleep at midnight, which I
never do U. So yeah, I mean that that's even more to me
like evidence that like, yeah, okay, this is the right path to
go here where it's like, yeah, I know I work on the internet
and I have to look at a bunch of screens and I love playing video
games and shit, but like dial back where I can like, you know,
I don't know if I talked last time about the Twitter stuff I did
where I like muted everybody into the list, and like now I just don't
even see Twitter. Really it's great. It's fucking amazing. Um, yeah,
dial back where I can um reading more. Uh, it's I got
that whole Ralph Walda Emmerson book and yeah, it's been it's been good.
So I'm very very happy without that's going. And yeah, I'm not would
I make fun of hyebrows stuff, I'm fucking I'm channeling my friend. He
believes it. He's like, ah, you fancy pants, fancy boy whatever,
it's like some coastal elite thing or whatever. I'm just being a dick.
I'm kid in a book, whine in a book. At Miles Davis
in a cabin. I realized that you know this, uh honestly sounds like
an incredible weekend. I would. I loved it. I drove home from
there just like fucking just calm and well rested and fucking like it was a
great time. Um, that sounds great. Speaking Mary, you mentioned table
shuffleboard I thought you were gonna say you played shuffleboard. Well you said they're
shuffle did photos. Me and my mom played shuffleboard for real fun, the
physical you know, one with the stick. I did it. I did
it last weekend. Um place. There's a place in Brooklyn called Royal Palms.
I had a funny weekend because, um, we weren't Amanda and I
weren't, or I rather are not. January is not over as of this
recording. We're not doing dry January intentionally, but we were also not feeling
well like the first two weeks of January. So then kind of two weeks
later we realized like, oh shit, we haven't had like a drop of
alcohol, and of course we're like sleeping much better. We're feeling better in
the Morning's like, oh interesting, I'm not sure what to learn from this.
No, um, But then we went to play shuffle board and then
had drinks. The first time got really drunk. It was really fun.
A shuffle board's fun. But B I had this. You guys know my
sense of humor. I guess people watching this no my sense of humor.
Um. I don't know if this comes through in the podcast, but sometimes
I will just like lie as a joke, like boy who cried Wolf well
for instance, Okay, so, um, like someone will be going to
hand me a drink. I'm like, oh no, sorry, I don't
drink, and but like take the drink anyway. It's dumb, it's not
even funny, but it makes people laugh for some reason. Amanda and I
were sitting at this bar and we're We're at um the bar in a hotel.
It's a fairly well known hotel in New York, and Amanda's back was
to the entrance of the cafe, and uh, all of a sudden,
Channing Tatum comes into the cafe, sits down at a table, and of
course I'm like, Amanda Channing Tatum sitting right behind you, and she's like
oh okay, And then I had to say it like yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah. I had to say it no joke like six times.
I'm like nope, okay, I realized this sounds like a bit, but
he's behind you. I'm pretty sure Zoe Kravitz lives in Brooklyn, so maybe
that's Ray I know, so yeah. Um. Finally she looks and he's
like, oh, holy shit, it is And like that was Friday night
and I never bother celebrities when I see them, just because I don't want
to be a most of the time. And I'll get to this, but
I usually don't bother people because I know that there are people they just don't
want to be like That was embarrassing when we were in New York that one
time when you saw Cosby. I've never seen anyone Mark. If you're a
new listener, I do not like Bill Cosby. We've gotten a bunch of
new listeners recently, and I don't like Mark photos with the cause, I
would say the cause I don't like this joke. I genuinely don't. Okay.
So that was Friday night, Saturday night or Saturday. We go to
play shuffle board at the Royal Palms in Brooklyn, and I'm with my buddy
Dan or you both know, Drew. I think at this point, um,
we're on a team or no, rather we're on the same side of
the court, so we're not on a team. But you know, I'm
talking to him and all of a sudden, Steve Nash, for those who
don't know, most recently, was the coach of the Brooklyn Nets. He
was a very famous guard for the Phoenix Suns back in the day. Famous
Canadian basketball player who came in was a big NBA player. He sits sound
this boothy behind my buddy Drew, and I'm like, oh, Steve Nash
just sat down, and again I had to tell him like six or seven
times until he finally looked. He's like, oh, you're You're not kidding,
because of course that's something I know, you crab wolf, and I'm
reaping what I've sewn. But it happened two nights in a row, and
then I actually I did get a photo of Steve Nash because other people were
like, fist bum me. He was being friendly as hell. He was
great. I was like, hey, man, I've been a fan here
since you played for the Suns. You known if we get a photo,
and I got one, and that was my that was my. There were
very few people I would like get starstruck by. We've talked about this,
Dan, Dan, you always say letterman, I would be David Byrne.
If I saw David Byrne, I'd piss my pants and still go up and
talk to him and then ship easy with anyone with common sense, It's pretty
easy to tell if it's a good time to ask a celebrity, like talking
to him or you ask for a picture or something. Sometimes they're just being
you know, smiley and fun talking to people and stuff like yeah yeah when
they're eating. No chanting to him was like hunched over winter hat on,
clearly covering up his face. I was like, okay, let's not Steve
Nash though, was like kind of wandering off by himself with a drink looking
or whatever. He's drinking looking at They had like NBA banners, the pennants
on the wall. He's looking at all those. He went to get to
the food truck and line like he clearly wasn't like hiding, and the people
start fist bumping and we're like, all right, let's go ask. And
he was super nice. He seems like a good guy, and I'm surprised
he's still hanging around Brooklyn. He got canned unceremoniously because of all the the
bullshit of the players on the Brooklyn nets. He got done dirty, as
they say, speaking of slang. Yeah, but you guys had some cool
weekends. Yeah, it was great Experio And I'm going to San Antonio this
weekend so I'll have another one. Nice. You are very active, These
young viril active. I'm so viril, so viril. What is the definition
of viril? What's the Lariam Webster here? It's about like child able to
have children? Is there something weird like that? Is that? No?
Yeah, I would say it's like, let me look, I think up
viral the dude version of that, and what's the lady version. It's uh,
there's a word too, viril and new bile beef in the oven.
You ever call me new bilele like au bile the same thing. No,
new bile is I'm fairly certain like a young young, young sexual. We
all look this up virile. The dude person of that thought all viral,
he's very virile or they probably gross words we shouldn't use. They're all having
having strength, energy and a strong sex that drive for a man. But
no, that's it looks like virile. But I think you usually say like
viral, viral. Okay, new bile, let's look that up. Nu
ball is a young woman sexually mature. But if she's sexually sure, that's
better. But the you know, old enough for marriage. I thought it
was versions of what country. Yeah, I've only ever seen on corn sights,
which is not a good start. I know that word. I see
it all the time. What sights? Where are they? What? Just
so I know not to go there. It's my favorite category. Yeah.
No, I'm gonna say I'm very virle this week at work and see what
they say. They're gonna tell you to get rid of your word of the
day calendar. Yes words, that would be so ghosh if they did that.
Um. There's an old Disney show called Even Stevens and if you guys
ever watched it, So the older brother who was like such a good character
on that show, he did this bit where he had a word of the
day calendar and every time he would walk into the room, he'd be like,
there's so much going on in this room. It's almost like a cornucopia
of items. And then he would walk out and they'd be like, this
fucking guy, Chyla move was No, it's brother, but there's like an
older guy. Oh okay, okay. Spans was the neighbor who came in
and just hung maybe it's that guy whatever. Beans was their neighbor that was
like his best friend or like the neighborhood was popping in at dinner time.
Disney Channel. I never had the Disney Channel, and I never had Cartoon
Network, and so there's realms of things I didn't like. I was Nickelodeon
through and through me had dug Nicktoons ran and steppy end of that ship.
Absolutely, but like Disney Channel stuff. We would have like three weekends and
I'd get see a couple episodes of goof Group or whatever, um, but
never any of the like there was that whole like live action era. Like
when my sisters were young, we had the Disney Channel and it was all
even Stevens and Hannah Montana and all that shit that they were sister sister.
Yeah, exactly like that era. But I was, yeah, what a
good era? Well yeah, because then Nickelodeon was my favorite by far,
but then Cartoon Network had Dexter's Laboratory, had Invader Zim. Fairly I had
that growing up, but I knew them because my parents. My dad had
them, so my dad had cable, my mom didn't. But I live
with my mom, so I never grew up with that stuff. Um,
but I was aware of how cool they were, how chicken that was like
the the young version of having different streaming services. I'm like, yeah,
I mean I had whatever, Cartoon Network, All right, swet channel because
that's well, it's like Nickelodeon for us was channel thirty four. Also shaquea
Eel's number, So I remember that Cartoon Network was fifty two cards in a
deck? And then shit, what was what was Disney Channel was like way
up? It was like it was like eighty five Dennis Rodman's number. Nickelodeon
growing up wasn't Nickelodeon, Comedy Central, Uh, CBS for Letterman, NBC.
Yeah, yeah, I was gonna say, you you judge, you
you knew networks by their talk show hosts. I didn't think you knew enough
about it to question me the most famous team in sports ever. Um,
yeah, I missed those days when I did not have a phone, when
I just had to worry about what cartoon channel this next show was going to
be on. Cartoon Network also had Looney Tunes all the throwback stuff when I
watched that, that was on Nickelodeon or what. But like, yeah,
I definitely grew up watching like Looney Tunes. And you know why the coyote
and all that shit, Um must have been a Nickelodeon. I would think
that ship was from like Mary Melodies. And all that. That was like
the sixties, right, what was it doing airing in like the early nineties.
Well, because Nick Nickelode did Nick at Knight. I was always like
Mary Tyler Moore and Dick Van Dye. You know what were you talking about,
like like Looney Tunes like that Space Race, Like I imagine it's just
like syndication shit like this is I don't know, I guess it's not that
different from streaming services now where it's like that's where Jerry sign That's why Jerry
Seinfeld has so much fucking money because Seinfeld got syndicated, so he was just
set for life. Oh yeah, syndication rights are massive. Yeah, I
mean that still happens, like you know, big Bang theory or whatever.
It's just raking in money because it's a syndication. But yeah, it's just
a bunch of different landscape now. Yeah. But then among the many other
not to be a downer, among the many other economic concerns recently, it's
like, um else it the phrase Hollywood Wall Street, Like the people on
Wall Street who inform the Hollywood market are saying like, oh man, all
this money you've been like catapulting into streaming is starting to not pay dividends.
You should pull out. We'll not pull out, but like, hey,
here's a slight warning that you're you're kind of you're kind of poking the bubble
um, which I think has been happening for all. Like Netflix hasn't been
great for a while, but it's also just white noise. Do you guys
know, Speaking of books, do you know um Don DeLillo? White noise?
Have you seen on Netflix with Adams Driver? It's credit Girwig as his
wife. Okay, so it's one of those books that's like widely considered Gwig.
Is that the the Global Warming? No, that's cred A Fundberg.
Oh okay, she's married. Okay, like Credi Gerwig directed Francis Ha.
She she's done, like she did Ladyberg, Ladybird. It's so new bile
though, you know that word sounds gross? Yeah, it is gross.
You've ruined that word was quite. I didn't know what it meant, and
you guys got weird with it. No, you didn't know. I mean
you were correct. Mike had the immediate reaction to someone who feels guilty because
he knew where that word came from. In his mind, what he's a
writer. You know, he's got don't don't don't be, don't be,
don't be, laconic um White Noise. Yeah, kind of more like laid
back, easy. Yeah. Wouldn't people describe orange cassidy. He's a laconic
Yeah, Okay, all right, he's the definition of it. White Noise.
This book by Don de Lillo, who also did Underworld. His first
book was Americana. He's done a shit ton. It's one of those books
that's considered like unadaptable to movie. Basically, Noah Bomback, who has done
like marriage stories done Noah on the Whale. He's just done these like low
key dissolving marriage, divorcing parents, kind of family drama stuff. He took
on White Noise, which is also where the band Airborne Toxic Event gets their
name. But the amount of money that they just threw at this dude who
had never done a movie of this scale and scope and by the I mean
Netflix, is absurd. I started watching it the other night and it's long.
I got two hours in and I'm like, this is the most expensive
movie I've seen in a long time. And Noah Bomback, who the last
movie I saw by him was about Scarlett Johansson, Adam Driver breaking up for
three hours in like three rooms that directed it. Yeah, yeah, which
I liked, But it's crazy and I'm like, if Netflix is doing this,
this must be like a tipping point of some sort. And it's not
that I didn't. I actually kind of enjoyed the movie. It's not perfect,
but from what I saw, I liked it. I feel it was
just a spending spree from like maybe the mid twenty tens, like we'll say,
like twenty sixteen, twenty seventeen, until maybe a little bit into the
pandemic where it's just like, you know, Netflix and Hulu and Amazon everyone
just spending so fucking much money just trying to get their exclusive things. Ever
since, I feel like House of Cards was that first really big one,
you know, where it's like, oh, we're just going to dump all
this, you know, the whole season goes up at once and it's Netflix
exclusive and all this stuff, and we got a list actors and all this,
and then like spending and then like I feel like, was it mid
pandemic or late kind of pandemic lockdown era that it's like, oh it should
like Netflix had a harsh drop off they went like seven hundred, eight hundred
to like fucking one fifty or two hundred or something like. It was precipitous.
Yeah, because other like others with your calendar words it three ones real
quick and trying to yeah, it's really okay, and it really is.
I think I think the the natter thing when things were nascent really would have
been ten. And then it just really did it really did just um precipitate
several wells. There were several defining factors of the of the of the It
was really raining shows. How would you describe that dead lift? Oh,
that dead lift was absolutely inscrutable. All right, dude, that guy,
that guy that's doing those uh those lateral raises looks pretty nonplussed. I never
plus okay, actually no, what defined nonplused? Well, it's confused because
I used in a bunch of giant on once and and people told me I
was saying it wrong. So oh yeah, yeah, okay, so I
see it is like unaffected unbothered, um, which it's like the opposite.
Okay, it's actually the opposite. I always thought that too, And then
I use it and someone was editing one of my like reviews or something,
and of course I use non plus in a video game review because I'm a
douche bag. But they're like, actually, this means that they were very
agitated, like upset. I was like, oh, that makes no sense.
It doesn't sound like that. The one I always remember from writing a
video game review was saying something like, oh, this thing, the visuals
don't jive with the whatever you know something? Yeah, oh gay, and
it's jibe with a B. Yeah yeah. But we debated it. Yeah,
and I always thought it was jive as well. And we talked about
coming down the pike as opposed to pipe right right right right. But yeah,
m hm. My vocabulary is real big. I know a lot of
words. I don't think I know what most of them or a lot of
them mean. I just hear them in a certain context and I think I
know how to use them, and I think ninety percent of the time I'm
right, but sometimes i'm pretty off, like non plussed. I was off.
Yeah, it happens. I pronounced a ray as ari until I was
like eleven eleven. Yeah, I was eleven. Uh, never forget when
you know, the old amuse bouche conversations happened and I embarrassed myself forever.
What's the actual thing? What did you? Well, that's how you said.
What did you What were you saying? Uh? What did I say?
I always a yeah, I just embarrassed myself. Fully, I don't
know how to say uh oh, hors, divors. Yeah, you're just
just tough though, Like I know order of when I see it, but
like when I actually go to spell it, But why don't we just convert
it like we do everything else because we're dumb dumbs. It's a lot of
problems, Mike orders, can you look it up? And I want to
see if I can spell a French word correctly, spelling prowess so technically I
believe it's more than one word. But sure, I turn up. Okay,
I got it? Uh, okay, do you I'm gonna need like
actual like exclamation points in it. Well, I don't know the lots or
whatever. It's r R S right, sure, d apostrophe O U R
B E S. No, you got the right letters, they're out of
order. It's d apostrophe O E U v R E s U ship.
But it's also v R e s all right, all right, it's it's
a dumb language. No, I'm just kidding. French is actually pretty cool.
Amanda speaks it really well. I speak Spanish proficiently, and Spanish makes
way more sense in my mind. Spanish is not that hard. No,
it's not read most Spanish. Yeah, French, Spanish, Italian. I
mean just they're the romantic languages. That's not a thing there. They come
from, like Roman, like largely affected by Roman Roman romantic m wait does
like love Romantic well, like Roman language is largely like Latin from what I
believe then, like a lot of different like what is it? There are
certain like this is like sat stuff that I forgot, like to know whether
the plural of a word would be like pie or like octopie or octopuses.
You have to know whether it's Greek origin or Latin. Latin is awesome though,
Like I loved learning, Like in junior high, I learned a bunch
of Latin stuff and like the prefixes and subfixes and you can like it's like,
oh, I can see where a lot of English words come from.
Where it's like uh, liberaate you know, liberty, freedom, you know
things like that, Like it's I thought that was really interesting. People don't
speak it now the five most widely spoken. Okay, I'm gonna look up.
Okay. The Romance languages, sometimes referred to as Latin languages or Neo
Latin languages, are various modern languages that evolved from Vulgar Latin. They are
the only extant group subgroup of the Italic languages in the Indo European language family.
Holy shit, there's a lot of different things there. What does vulgar
means? Also known as popular or colloquial Latin, is the range of non
formal registers of Latin spoken from the Late Roman Republic onward. There you go.
So there were the prominent languages in the Late Roman Republic that carried on
into like big languages nowadays. When was Rome like a big deal? Was
that like hundreds or thousands of years ago, the thousands, when like Caesar
and all that ship was happening, Caesar, Augustus Marcus Aurelius, was that
near Never forget Augustus Gloup that part of the Renaissance? Or was that this
would have been before the Renaissance? Okay, well, I mean, like
the Renaissance sparked near where all this shit happened, but it was long before
it there's so much creat because you learned about, like I know of the
Renaissance. I know of like the Roman Empire and all that stuff, but
there's crazy shit that you don't realize where the crossovers were, Like what was
that was then Assassin's creed in origins were with pyramids. That was one where
it's like there was like Roman statues and stuff, and it's like, what
the fuck does all this? Yeah, I heard that like Rome and Egypt
had like a crossover view going on Libya, which is just west of Egypt.
Was I'm gonna mix this up. Was a initially, I believe.
I think it like changed hands between the Greeks and Romans several times through like
political and bloodshed. So the Rome like invade Egypt and like own the pyramids
and stuff. Oh yeah, Rome, and like what Cleopatra and Caesar got
super tight. I fuck it with Clepand whenever I hear about Cleopatra, they
were historical context, they were virile, they were new bile anybody that he
boo. Whenever I hear Cleopatra brought up in a historical context, that fucks
me up because I think I always confused her with Medusa and I think Medusa
was fictional, and so like when I I I'll hear Cleopatra and I'll picture
like the snake hair and everything. I'm pay a minute. That wasn't a
shoot, Like Cleopatra wasn't around, but I guess she was like a historical
real person. Yeah, Cleopatra's brother was told me the I forget the number,
told me the sixth or second or something. He was installed by that.
I believe, I'm fucking so much of this up. I think he
was allied with the Greeks, and then Cleopatra was like in exile, she
got close with Caesar, believe they were they were bumping uglies. And then
she came back to Egypt and she had her brother killed and took over.
I actually want correction on that because I was interested in that stuff for a
while. UM, just make make sure you're correct, because if you're not,
we can't air this. I know, you know, all right,
I can't wait for the emails. No, I'm actually asking for corrections there
because I think I'm sort of fairly close. And you know how you know
how history exams go in high school when your teacher makes you you failed,
like I was in the Ballpark. Yeah. Anyway, Um, do you
guys want to talk about video games? It's two thousand and eight the USG
issue. No, I'm just kidding. Death Space Make It Out is now
out? If you're listening to this came out Friday. Does it have any
kind of like remake or it just it's just all dead Like if you look
at the two titles listed side by side, there's no correct, it's just
both dead Space right correct? Yeah? Yeah, I guess from from here
on out, we'll have to say it like Doom twenty sixteens, like Dead
Space twenty twenty three. Yep, yep. I don't necessarily like that,
but it works like if I say a Hitman twenty sixteen. You know,
I'm not talking about the fucking PS two games. So yeah, it works.
Got a Wars same thing. Yeah, I'd rather that than like a
clunky subtitle. You know. Oh yeah, what are the I mean some
of them lean into a tomb Raider anniversary tomb Raider legend. You know,
there's there's like they get recently, they have really bad ones. Was it
remastered edition? Yes, that's exactly the one I would have. Was that
Red Faction Gorilla Remastered oh, there was a Darksider's Death Definitive edition. Yeah,
yeah, which the remarkstart, I don't mind because that game is already
like dumb fun that Darksiders, which is not really that. So that's when
I was like, oh my god. Yeah, the first game was very
serious of Darksiders, like let's do gritty mythical or like biblical. Yeah.
I like that first one a lot. I like the first and second one.
The second one was like a bit more over, like open and collectible
laden. But now here's a question, what's the new dead Space like?
It's I like it a bunch. They made some changes. I would say,
right off the bat, if you really liked the first game, you
played it, it'll be noticeable how much Isaac Clark talks. Now. Yeah,
I had forgotten because like in two and three he had a voice,
right, but I forgot he was silent in the first one, and they
like totally changed his face. He looks like Lance Armstrong. Now they changed
his face. They couldn't um, I'm assuming it's contractual thing. They didn't
get Hammond back pretty the dude. He's the actor who gets kicked into the
bottomless well in three hundred played Hammond, if memory serves, But oh yeah.
At first I was like, oh God, what are they doing?
But the more I played it, and I think I'm about halfway, I
actually like it. The voice actors are all good, but specifically with Isaac
talking, but he'll take his helmet off and walk around and talk on the
radio sometimes. But I think they actually did it in a creative way,
in the sense that when you have objectives Isaac when he's talking to Hammond and
should I forget his other shipmate's name after Chen gets killed, he'll like give
more engineering centric reasons for what the objective is. That kind of lend a
bit more flavor to it. It's no longer just like Hammond somehow knows how
to decouple this thing and then refuse that. It's Isaac being like, oh,
guys, someone they'll give him an objective Isaacly like, that's actually not
as easy as you're making it sound. Also that the medical wing is flooded
with necromorphs or whatever, like guys like I will have to do this in
that and this that's a complicated process, and the like, well we gotta
I was like, oh, okay. In the original version, it was
like Hammond being like, you'll have to go there reattach this and somehow he
knows this, so it actually works. It's not just ham fisting dialogue.
In For the most part, I think all of the changes work really well,
and I was surprised because like I hadn't really follow the development or announcements
or anything. There's more changes than I expected. In fact, I one
of the things I definitely remember about the first one was the asteroid thing being
a giant pain in the ass, Like there's a part where you just have
to sit and like, yeah, just shoot a billion asteroids one die.
Yeah, I remember being like a pain in the ass. And this one,
like there is still that sequence where there are asteroids coming at the ship,
but the way they handle it, Mike, I don't know if you've
been there yet is like totally different and it's fun. It's just like basically
you're kind of flying around in zero G, which they added like a bunch
of like zerog like mobility stuff to this one. And yeah, that's really
well, which you know, that's an easy thing to kind of fuck up
and be disorienting, but like they made it really easy to kind of like
write yourself and rotate and all that. So you're going up with these different
stations of these turrets and you have to calibrate the turrets by pointing them at
a certain amount of asteroids, and once you've done that, you can leave
it and it will shoot the asteroids for you you move on to the next
one. It just makes it a much smoother experience there. Yeah, the
map's a lot better now. It looks more like kind of like the map
from like you know, Resival to Remake. It's not a clunky like you
know, mid two thousands where everything was trying to do the worst. According
to Kayla, goddamn god, damn it. Yes, it's everything was trying
to do three D maps in the mid two thousands and most of them sucked.
So this is like flat and works better. Yeah, this zer g
stuff is good. Some of it doesn't. Some of it really shows the
time it was made. There's a lot of very obvious like environmental storytelling or
stuff like as soon as you get the plasma cutter that's cut off their limbs
written in blood on the wall, and in the span of like five minutes
I got the mcutter. It says that in blood on the Wall there's an
audiolog I find where they're like, we shot it in the face, but
it didn't die. We had to shoot off its arms and its legs before
he died. Yea. And then I got a tooltip that was like,
hey, just to reiterate, oh my god, it's arms and it's legs.
And then a tooltip pops up and says, hey, hey, you
should shoot their limbs with the plasma cutter. You can rotate it if you
need to cut the limbs better. Then you get a call from your captain
and he says, don't even try to shoot him in the head, and
Isaac goes, yeah, the only ways to kill him is to cut off
their limbs, their arms, their legs. Clear. I wrote that down
verbatim because it was so just like, hey, shoot their fucking limbs.
I have a I have a screen shot at one of the tram stations.
I forget which one, in small paint chalk, I don't know. There's
several of those, kind of like a hyper corporate propaganda posters the tram station
to say come work for concordance. It's the whole like Verhoeven, like RoboCop,
like yeah, doopian um. There's a little. I don't know who
wrote this or if it happened after the outbreak or what, but it just
says, in case you guys weren't aware of the very subtle themes of the
trilogy, someone wrote, fuck this ship, it's a shitty capitalist organization.
Yes, And then I saw I took a picture of one sent at the
bunk where it's just like a post it note or something, and it just
says, we have run out of body bags here the spray painted it on
the wall. Well, I realized that I forgot how kind of dumb this
game is with stuff like that, and like spoiler story mute for ten seconds
if you went through here. Um, but like the whole gimmick of the
yeah the Nicole is dead, gimmick of the first letters of all the chapters,
It's like, that's such a dumb thing, like but love. And
I was seventeen, I'm like, oh, that's that's so brilliant that that
means. That does not mean what I'm saying. It means. Okay,
I remember thinking it was back then, but it seems kind of just like
okay, sure, right, I don't think it's a neat idea. It's
kitchy and it's silly, but it is like an interesting thing. I was
reading a whole thread about how graffitian games rarely does what it's meant to do,
because graffiti is pretty much about trying to say something to the masses that
you're not supposed to or allowed to say. In protest right, it's not
really meant to be something that you yeah, it's not. It doesn't work
like that, and so you can do that to get the word across.
But that's why it always feels awkward to the player in terms of like story
building, because no one would actually write that down. They did write like
anything. They would just probably write like it, you know, like we're
all gonna die or whatever. Did you guys remember the Left or Dead storyboards
that would just say like, you know, we're all gonna die, and
then they would fight in the storyboars and be like I hope you died.
He'd be like, you know what, screw you man, and they were
like fighting in the spray paint like that's like a classic. Well, we
talked about Signalis last year. That was the first game in a while that
did not do all these tropes like you get a code you could read emails
on computers because there was a power surge that reset the security on the computers,
which let you there was people complaining that someone had access to this channel.
It all was, I don't know, more diagetic that like actually I'm
serious about um no, yeah, actually good diagetic. I wrote my notes
for this because of all the digetic hud stuff. Oh yeah, yeah,
you know that holds up like seeing the AMMO on the guns and seeing the
health bar like on his back, like fucking no hut at all. It's
all diegetic, like in world like that. That's awesome, I think.
Yeah, and they did make so Yeah, the zero G is no longer
you're picking a point and leaping shooting there like a laser and then you're magnetized
to it. It is. They retrofitted two and three, especially three zero
G into one, so that works like they've retrofitted a lot of two and
three stuff into one, whether it's the zero G or Isaac talking more.
But they also messed with the weapons a bit in ways I love because I
don't know if you remember, in the original version of Dead Space, the
pulse rifles alternate fire. He would kind of stick it in the ground and
it would rotate like a sprinkler shooting bullets, but the bullets were never powerful
enough to do anything. Pulse rifle is only good if you can shoot them
like seventeen times in a row in one specific spot. So like, what
the fuck is the point of this? So now it's the proximity mine that
was not the alternate fire in the original game. They added that, um,
did you get the flamethrower yet? Yes, the what was the flame
the flamethrowers original alt fire? I forget what it was. But now it's
like a wall of fire that anybody who goes any necromorpher that goes through it
just is incinerated. So in like a room, you can like you know,
you can set up like okay, well that blocks off that area.
Yeah, yeah, they did that some of the like for all of the
dumb blood on the wall stuff. Some of the text logs are I forgot.
Someone compared one my coworkers, who knows the game the original much better
than I do, show the difference between two text logs, and I was
like, oh, the writing is better now, Like I don't think I
would have noticed when I was seventeen. Hub and I've played that game many
times since, but I don't read the text slugs anymore, or I haven't
read them since I was seventeen and played the game for the first time.
So it was really I was like, oh, wow, they are a
bit less ham fisted than the first game. It was all that, like
the same annoying, overwrought in your face, blood in the wall stuff,
but same text logs. And now not that they're all perfect by any means,
but they definitely show a bit more understanding, and it helps that the
trilogy has been completed for a while, so they have more context for They
introduce the alien technology unitologist stuff much earlier markers a unitology or unitarians a real
thing unitology. Yes, I get a mixed up. Yeah, yeah,
it's a lot of that, Like it seems dated now, but also everything
was doing it at the time, so it's like, you know, I
get kind of oh, there's a lot of audiologs here. There's these video
transmissions that play and you can't really do anything until it's done. It reminds
me of the like Gears or the Arkham like slow Walk and talk about like
it's annoying now, but like that wasn't really a big problem back then,
so it's like it's not bothering me too much here, But like there are
those moments where you realize that this was a game that was made two thousand
and eight, but a lot of it, like the fucking stomp is still
so good. I still think the objective marker, just that tram it shows
it on the ground is great because then it's like, Okay, that's the
way forward. I can go down these side things if I want to explore
and get some nodes or whatever. I forgot about the kinetic stuff though,
like the I love any game that has like that psy ops you know,
Force Star Wars. You can throw stuff, Yeah, and I forgot about
the stuff where it's like, oh, I can cut off a fucking spiky
arm up one neck or more kinnetic that into my hands and then use it
to impale another one against the wall, which she feels good. Yeah.
I love that. There's also like three levels of security doors now, yeah,
which gives it more of a metroidvania feel, which the game was always
somewhat of a metroidvania, but now it's specifically like, okay, mental note
to come back to this room. That the story will probably not take me
to so I can get past this into this locker. Yeah, it's like
metal Gear. You get like a level three key card and find yourself in
an early area. It's like, oh, fucking go into this room now
and give both the famaus or whatever. Yeah. Yeah, in general,
it's faithfully made, but they changed enough little nitpicky things. I probably would
have had if I played the original nowadays. I think that played the original
like three years ago maybe, Yeah, replayed the trilogy the best weapon Mary,
it would have been when we played it for Knevil. Those were good
times. Yeah, And I don't I don't think any of the Dead Space
games have aged particularly poorly. Really enjoying them, every one of them.
I remember like kind of breezing through and not having too much difficulty. I
do remember the Asteroid sequence fairly well, Dan and like how that was a
little annoying but such a scary game. It's a spoopy game. It's great
but tense and like it had a lot of action. It wasn't it wasn't
full on survival horror where you're like scraping by for Ammo and stuff, like
there would be those rooms where you walk in and it's like, Okay,
there's gonna be a bunch of fucking action in here. There's gonna be a
bunch of ship coming through events and everything, and like it was just tense
action more than I think it was horror. And also it was the game
that most channeled Event Horizon to me, and I love Event Horizon and just
that like idea of like space horror, like just fucked up stuff is happening
on the ship. Like I thought it worked so well then, and this
is a really really great remake. I think, Yeah, it's super good.
I don't. I it's all so darker in a good way, not
in like a Game of Thrones finale way. It's like it makes it scarier
because you go into some rooms and they purposely the lights will go off and
the power is faltering, and like, oh fuck, and it's you're not
supposed to be able to see. It's not a screen darkness problem, it's
oh fuck, the lights are off in the game. In the world.
In the room, you have that new mechanic where it's like you go up
to the circuit breaker or whatever, and it's like, okay, you can
only use two of these three things, and one of them is the lights.
So it's like, Okay, I can unlock the elevator and the doors,
but that means I gotta turn the lights off and I gotta go through
this scary ass place with no lights. And I was HDR around when two
thous newer technology, so like DR and just getting those like darker blacks and
everything like that's uh, it's really really effective in this. Yeah, I
like it a whole bunch. Yeah, I'm getting excited. I'll probably maybe
play some more after that. I want to play it. It's really cool.
But it's got that the last of us resival for perfect pacing loop of
like Scavenge Crap at Kale Gather Upgrade Puzzle Solve Scavenge Craft. It's like it's
hard to put down. It's like I'll just play another ten minutes until the
next day point. Yeah, oh but now I can go I have another
Yeah, I have my notes. I put every note in the plasma cutter,
so like if I run out of plasma cutter, mo like the other
stuff works, but it's like my plasma cutter is just amazing. Yeah,
that's the that was the achievement. That was a really fun achievement to get
on three sixty the pla. Yeah yeah, um yeah, I uh,
I like that game quite a bit. Great, it's still very good if
you never played it back in the day, Like you don't really need nostalgia,
just just play it. It's very good. Yeah. What a cool
looking suit too, Yep, very cool. Yeah, I love the suit.
Yeah, you're toast her head. Yeah yeah, Mary, I'm curious
what you think having played Dead Space for the first time, Like, what,
I haven't played it. You guys played it. I haven't played No,
sorry, excited, I'm curious what you think having only played the first
one. Finally played the first one three years ago. Right, it's I
don't know, like there's a lot of stuff. I forget that that circuit
breaker puzzle wasn't even in the original. Yeah, it's it does what a
good remake should do, and kind of it's like, oh right, this
is how I remember the game, even if it's up every once in a
while. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sure if I looked back at like footage
of eight, I'd be like, oh wait, that actually looks way worse.
But in my mind, like this is how I remember playing this game.
It's good. Timing too after Plissa Protocol was not great. Actually,
yeah, that's that's great. Having past that game was not we did.
We talk about that on here. It's not good. Yeah, okay,
um Mary, would you play playing? Um? So, I gave up
on a game a couple of months ago and I talked about it on here.
It was called The Night Which, yeah, we talked. We were
all excited when we heard the Elevator pitch for it, and we were all
excited about it. And I played it and I said, it's kind of
ridiculous and it shoves you in these like really small spaces with a shit ton
of enemies and it's just like good luck, and like it's really kind of
chourney in that space. So I quit. Well, I went to the
villages in Florida and I brought my Steam deck. I'm sure you were.
That was a hit. They were all paying those couldn't get enough. What
are these night Wich You didn't spoilers? You had to walk around with your
hands over your ears. Yeah, what is that? Dead space? I
needed? Uh? I needed a game I could play on the plane for
like five hours. And this is a game you can really sink your teeth
into because it's all about improving your skills. It's like I said, it's
very churney, like these boss fights can take a lot of turns to get
through, and I needed something that I could spend a lot of time on.
So I restarted The Night Wich and I kind of like it now it's
pretty good. Um, I think putting in time, I hint, I'm
a better person now. I needed to put more time into building my character,
and I also think I need to get over the hurdle of this game.
You build a deck and you are you are a Nightwich, and you
fly, so you can you can go anywhere. It's a bit of a
bullet hell where you can fly anywhere with your left stick. Your right stick
is your aim, and you just kind of basically want to always be shooting
abs so that you can constantly be hitting all the enemies that are coming at
you. You can either point your stick at them to shoot them that causes
more damage, or you cannot. You will auto target the closest enemy for
a little less damage. But then you don't have to like you don't even
have to point at them. You can just shoot and run around like a
little what was this a while ago? You talked about this a couple months
ago. Maybe it was it was recommended to me by um like another streamers
while Kim Chika does like a lot of cozy games and so on my Steam
deck and no, I got it on my switch or something, and I
played it on a plane. I totally forgot I played that. It's like,
oh wait, I remember flying around doing this like my third Vanian thing.
That's right, That's why I played it too. A bit was it
was impressed, but I only played it on that one flight. Yeah,
kind of. It was just ramps up the difficulty really heavily, and I
got to this point where I was like, this game isn't worth like beating
my head against a wall to beat these spaces in these areas. This trip,
however, because I was sitting on a plane for five hours, I
just kept churning these areas, and every time I beat one it felt good,
like it gives you a nice feeling when you can get through these very
difficult spaces or that like tough boss fight and so kind of burning through it,
I have felt a bit more confident and a bit more of an understanding
of what this game is trying to do. It just push you and again
the mechanics of like, so you pick this deck and you always have three
cards. They're randomly going to give you three cards. You get manna from
killing enemies, and then you can use that man to play a card.
A card could be something like a shield, or it could be a really
heavy weapon or a machine gun. There's all sorts of line. I'm I'm
now, I'm so far in the game because I played it all the way
there. I played it while I was in Florida, and then I played
it all the way back. So now I've like sunk, you know,
fifteen hours into this game. I have all the cards. I'm pretty I'm
a powerful witch, and I am murdering these things. And I've started to
notice that the depth of the game is a little deeper than I was giving
it credit for. The art of the game is actually pretty good. There's
a couple areas I've been in now that are fucked in a good way,
you know what I mean, where like they put a lot of energy into
like showing really sad ass creature, just like a gross grotesque, like fucked
up creature, And I was like, man, the art team had a
ball making these like weird ass creatures in what I would consider if you were
to look at this game, if you were to look at image of this
game on Google, you'd be like, this just looks like a cute like
kitchy sweet game has a dark underbelly, and it has a decent concept of
a story of like how you know how the media plays a toll on like
war and like a person who is in war, whether or not they're on
the right side. And you know, I mean, these things are have
been said before. But I think it's an interesting take on the game and
I've enjoyed it. I actually I've I've completely flipped my script on it.
I think it's a good game. I do think people should give it a
shot. Thanks Kim Chica. Sorry it took me six months to come to
terms with it, but I actually think it's pretty good. The thing that
I got that I bounced off of with it is a lot of games are
using deck building in interesting ways to mash up with other genres. My problem
with this was, like in a bullet hell and correct me if I'm wrong.
I think if memory serves it's, yeah, you're building a deck of
three cards and then you're using the three. You're using X, Y,
and B the face buttons to cast that random card that's as signed to that
button. In a bullet hell, when things get difficult, I would rather
know which button the shield is on. But the way that they randomize the
buttons, I'm like, I don't feel like that fits with a bullet hell.
That was one of the things that really kissed me off. Yeah,
because you're talking about like a screen filled with bullets and I have to look
at the lower right and be like, okay, so why is a my
machine gun? And you can have I think your deck can have like eight
to ten cards, but it's random which three you have at any given time.
So just because you have a show doesn't mean it's in your three at
this time. Yeah. I don't know. I just didn't It didn't feel
like a fifth. Maybe I just wasn't there too, because I'm finding that
I can't have the card that I want at the appropriate time. I think
that's honestly the reason I quit. Am I here. I think you're frozen,
Mike, No, you're completely Wait now you're back, You're coming back,
You're coming back. Okay, I think you might be back. Okay,
Am I back, wait, wait, tell you something like I am,
I am saying something. Oh you're slowly waiting too, And yeah,
Mike was telling him where he started that he's had some bad internet because there's
been storms in the area. Well, I'm also in the area. But
I have you known adult internet? You know you had internet problems like last
year for two weeks straight. It's a nightmare. But then I did the
adult thing and I got, you know, stuff that worked, so we
come on, it should work. Yes, Well, okay, let's get
out of the screw driver or whatever you are there. My biggest problem is
just my power goes out, like not all the time, but like if
there's a storm with wind, I'm like, oh, I better stuck up
on candles, Like it's a It's a consistent enough thing that I've gotten to
accept it. I guess mine is the basement flooding. If I had to
pick one thing, yeah, powers good, but yeah, basement flooding.
Snakes is fucking phenomenal. But every once in a while, snakes. I'll
take good Internet if it means I get a snake or two. I don't
think they're connected, honest, Like that reminds me like when we worked at
Gabe Spot. Mike used to do that all the time, with those stupid
like um like something really good, but something bad happens to you. And
there would be like two different versions of them, and they were both so
horrible, like they would they would just be like terrible things like you know,
your feet are hands and your hands or your feet um or you know
you have to like poo and pee out of the same hole. And every
time you do you have to whistle. It's just like no one wants to
pick between those. Well, that's the whole point is you got to debate
which one's worse. And I had a book I remember once and the one
that always stuck with me. The book was all would would you rather this
or that? And it was would you rather poop a watermelon or pam Marble?
And I assume it is meant for dudes, and I would I don't
know, no, no, no, no, not a watermelons, poop
a softball or pam marble? So like watermelon would wreck you for life,
but like softball would just be a bad day. So like, I don't
know which one would be worse. I mean they sound awful, I would
say me the marble. Here's the thing kidney stones sound back is they're jagged
and they're gonna rip up your urethra. I think a marble being smooth,
it would just be like whoa, that's stretchy. But it wouldn't be like
cutting you up, you know. Yeah, you just squeeze the hose a
little bit and it kind of shoots out. Yeah, you can just kind
of grab the base and scoot it up like a toothpaste tube and just get
that marble out of there. Probably, I don't know if that's like honest
for you. If that, I think I have a normal I don't look
like you're the kind of person that says that you want to be knocked out.
Looking Dan with the big pepole, look got the big hole on Dan.
I don't think there's a lot of variants in that, is you can
shoot marbles out of that thing. No, I don't want to do you
guys, I probably shouldn't pose a question with my internet's unstable. No,
you're coming back for now, I'm back. Do you remember the movie Little
Nikki? Yeah? I never saw it. I played the game Boy,
so I mean he's the Devil's son or something. Adam Sandler, but like
he's in hell and Hitler shows up and his punishment in I Forget Um,
his Hitler's punishment is to get a pineapple shoved up his ass every single day
for the like eternity. Okay, and the watermelon reminded me of that.
I got to look up who played Hitler in Little Nikki, because there's no
way it's just a random person I think it was. It wasn't a character,
it was just someone. It was a cameo from Hitler. Really,
er Carroll. It's Chris Carroll. Oh yeah, that Hitler looking guy.
Okay, Yeah, it just looks like Hitler. Okay, I thought it'd
be Chris Kitain since it was an SNL guy. Okay. I don't think
this movie was super SNL heavy people. Was it that Lauren most of the
time? Maybe this was like Happy Madison era, but a lot of the
SNL stuff early on, like producing it. Yeah, Oh yeah, this
is a Tim Hurley that the Sandler squad. Yeah. I would rather Yeah,
I guess I would rather Pam Marble. Yeah, I'd be smoother.
The softballs have seems and I don't want that fucking up I wrecked him or
whatever. Yeah, I'm trying to remember now what some of the weirder ones
I said would have been. It's like, would you rather be buried alive
for thirty seconds every time you sneeze? Or or uh, be falling from
a skyscraper for ten seconds every time you poop? I can hold in my
sneezes, but I can't hold in my poops. So fun. Yeah,
if you know you're not gonna land and be fine, Yeah, I'm totally
fine. Actually, i'd be fine with the baried to life teop. With
the baried to live part wouldn't be fun. It would just be like,
all right, I gotta do this for ten seconds. The falling while you're
falling. Oh um, no, you don't actually poop. It's like falling
from a skyscraper replaces the poop function in your body. That just sounds fun.
I love skydiving. I would love to do that every time. Yeah.
Um, would you rather have game cubes for nipples or plasma two thousand
little plasma TVs for nose hairs? Do I have to have? Do I
have to have three GameCubes as nipples? Since I have nipples, have three?
You'd have the orange one, the purple one tiny GameCube. Yeah,
okay, yeah, I get the spice orange for my third one, I
get the end to go for the all right, yeah, yeah, I
guess I'd go with the GameCube nipples, although that'd be hard to hide the
shirt. I guess the plasma TV nose hairs if they're tiny enough you wouldn't
really notice. I would do the GameCube nipples because I think you could sell
that. Do they work? People would pay good money? The GameCubes and
the TV's work. Okay, Oh if I had, can I choose both?
And then I can like component from the GameCube nipples to the plasma Which
would you rather have? GameCube nipples are saying you could play like sunshine on
your nose hairs, but you couldn't see it. You'd have to have like
a mountain thing that came out. Yeah, yeah, you run, You
run Sunshine on your nipples, but you the images in your nose. Someone
else could play. You could just sit. You're like one of those consoles
that the McDonald's. You just sit in a chair and kids play Sunshine with
your nipples in your nose. The officer get ordered for bachelor parties, but
you stop after you take off your shirt and then everyone starts playing plays Warrior
were Mega party games speaking of nipples for hands or gamecubesure this. I'll do
my best to not make this boring for the audio listeners, Hey, what
the fuck are you doing? Not being video? Yes, video people,
I have a dual sense edge. It is. Uh, it's the it's
the elite equivalent that it's PlayStation's first like quote unquote professional grade controller. Uh.
Comes in a cool roundish like astro hard yep. Okay, what do
you put that in a luggage and it's not going to get squish? Correct?
Yeah, it's it's but it's got a little cool velcro flap so you
can be charging it while it's in here. Nice. Um, But I
don't know if you're looking at it, I guess describe it. It's just
if you're looking at head on, it honestly looks like a dual sense except
there are two. You could see these two like kind of extra small like
outcropping like yeah, nubs under the analog sticks. And you'll notice I have
the PS three half dome analogs I swapped in. Those are the coolest part
actually, So it's not super different from the Xbox Elite. But UI wise
it is great because I have control layouts. It's got the two back buttons
here where your middle fingers are. Those can either be levers more like the
Xbox Elite like that click, but I accidentally hit those a lot, and
I prefer these, which are like half PS three analogs, and they're very
satisfying and they're easier. So in games like I used a few examples um
Horizon for Bin West, Red Dead Redemption to Elden Ring. In games where
you normally have to use the dpad to cycle through items, you could just
put them there so you don't have to take your thumb off the analog during
boss fights or anything. You can swip, swept, swap incantations or spells
in Elden That's what I do with the the I have the Elite for Xbox
and for like Fortnite and stuff, I have it, so like I switch
between weapons and stuff with those paddles and the super helps and so these nubs
here though they both do the same thing, it's just oh shit, A
my damn, am I out again. I'll continue for the audio listener,
he's probably sounding fine. He doesn't sound fine here, h I'm gonna wait,
no, wait, you're coming back. You're going back, You're backs
back. I'm going to continue for the audio listeners and for people in video.
Yeah yeah yeah, but um, there's two of these nubs. They
do the same thing, just depends on which thumb is free. You hold
it, it brings up a menu. Each phase button is assigned to a
specific profile that you saved. So I have one profile it's called dead Space.
I have one profile that's Horizon. I have one profile it's elden Ring.
You could swap like in a matter of two, like a second immediately,
so I jump into Warhammer Vermontide too. I'm like, oh right,
I saved a specific analog sensitivity, a certain button layout. I'm going to
switch to Vermintide. There's six different default analog sensitivities. You can fine tune
them. You could do dead zones, you could do actual you can change
it shows you like the bar graph of how sensitive they are in the middle
compared to when you first press end let go, so you can get really
into it. If you're playing like Overwatch two semi professionally, I don't know
why you'd be playing on console, but you could do it immediately, like
I have Red Dead. I was just testing it out and I'm like,
oh, Red Dead would be a game. I want to change the analog
sensitivity because that game can be kind of floaty in a lot of ways.
That game just doesn't for as much as I love, it doesn't control all
that well. So I use the steady analog sensitivity, that's what they call
it. It's like you can aim smoothly but also quickly, so I don't
have to rely on the audio or auto aim. So it's it's cool,
honestly, it's it's nice to be able to jump between these games, which
on modern consoles it's super easy to jump between games, so now it's nice
to be able to I was like, oh, I'm going to play a
shooter game, so I'm going to go back to the default dual sense and
just you pull them off like that and put it on and now you have
that analog. There a couple of main questions here, because I love my
Xbox, I'll lead, Does it have the thing where you can adjust the
throw of like L two and R two. Yes, the trigger stop there's
two. You do a real quick pop up to shoot. But if it's
like more of an analog racing game or something like that. Yeah, you
can see if you're watching there's just two notched. His next game, there's
only three settings. That's what Yeah, I just had too. So for
Vermintide a game where you're hacking and swinging a lot, or maybe if you're
playing Skyrim when you kind of its fingerstrained and be swinging a saurdaton, you
can raise the trigger stops so it's like clicking, it's only going down like
a quarter inch inside the whole trigger pull. It's Red Dead game, a
game where you're pulling triggers for like old school weapons. It kind of I
like keeping it the original, like all the way down. But yeah,
that's there too. That does not you cannot save that to the profile because
that's that's analogic flip. That's easy, just flip. The other one is
my other question is um I just one of my favorite things and so simple
about the Elite is just the weight. It just feels like less plastic e
it's heavier. It just it feels feels legit. You know, the dual
sense dual sense has some weight to it. Um. Yeah, it feels
the yeah heavy with good but the controller light the okay the Honestly, this
reminds me of why the steam deck feels so much better than the switch.
It doesn't feel as like flimsy. The edge feels a bit heavier. I
like it. The only thing is visually. Oh. Also, the grip
is different on the back where your middle fingers rest. It's a bit it's
not as coarse. I kind of like it. But there it's like a
separate plate on the back instead of just one smooth thing. How much is
it? Two hundred? To be clear, I got it sent from Sony.
I wouldn't about this fight, didn't. I just like it's a novelty
to have, and this is just like one of Polygons units. I just
have it at the apartment. Now. That other difference is again I'm trying
to describe this as well as I can. For audio, I've got the
black dual sense here, it's more of the Matt Black where the PlayStation logo
button is between the analogs, the dual sense edge. It's like shiny now
specifically because that's the plate you remove if you want to swap out the analog,
The actual the base of each analog. Let me see if I can
do that. I didn't realize that made different colors for the dual sense.
I thought it was just the white one. They brought up the black,
that blue, and now there's a maroon as well. Really, so you
can take that off, you can take the plate off, and then you
can actually pull out the analog housing. I don't I won't do it right
now. I don't have to. But which the main thing to do there
is, or the main reason they do that is it's because like hey,
joy or analog drift is a thing nowadays. So rather than buy a whole
other two hundred dollars controller, just pay like I don't know, those are
not included the replacements. It's like, just pay for whatever, like forty
bucks for the new one. I'm like, on the one hand, I
guess it's nice to have that option, but also it kind of sucks because
it's just like saying analog drifts like we can't fix it. It's a break.
Yeah, So I was like, oh, come on, yeah.
One thing that really annoys me about the elites. I've had two of them
do this now is it's got the kind of rubber like feels good. It's
got the rubber textured grip. But I've had two Elites now, and maybe
it's just because I use them all the time, but um, they flap
out and they like they get disconnected and then like there's no good way to
shove them back in. It's just like it's a lemogram. This one has
not done it. But on the back here there's like a break basically here
where the like rubber pad is, and then like it'll just like get loose
and flappy. It's just like, well, okay, that's just like that
now, and I can shove it back in. You can't like hot glue
it back in there. I could see that having there. Yeah, there
is a similar ridge here. Um, I hope I do tell if that
happens there. Yeah, I mean it's a wild for both elades that it
didn't too. But yeah, I've gone I have like five elides. I
mean it's it's largely a novelty for me as someone who's not like who doesn't
really get super care that much about like dead zone and whatnot. But like
it is kind of fun to again jump into vermintied two, switch my triggers
to the highest trigger style. I said everything audio listeners, I said everything
I want to say my internet still messed up. Yeah, you're you're you're
back, You're back. You don't go, don't for too long, and
that's all your listeners should be. Right. I probably wouldn't say, I
probably wouldn't spend two hundred dollars on it. But I'm not playing like I
don't again, I don't get into like dead zone stuff and too deep into
it. It's just nice to have options for different games. Yeah, we're
not doing competitive fucking fps or anything like that, but like, I just
like the weight. I do like the paddles. I use those sound mainly
for Fortnaite, but I use it for Elden Ring two, So like b
I mapped to one of those paddles, so like I can dodge and I
can sprint, which is that kind of like back right pinky without without taking
your thumb off the camera analyog exactly. Yeah. I did that with this
too, eld and I find it very useful. Which yeah, I'm near
the end of that again. So yeah, you guys been playing anything else?
Yeah? Yeah, Mari, what do you planned? Um, I'm
playing this game called I'm probably not going to pronounce this right. I believe
it's called moncage. It is a three D cube puzzler in the vein,
would you burge anything? Um, turn, I'm picturing like a three D
cube puzzler spirit than a cube. Let me think if this could be compared
to I'm like trying to the Intelligent Cube Intelligent Cube for the PlayStation. Does
that even mean? I don't think I played that. It's been it's a
cube puzzler. Oh okay, yes, yeah, I believe I believe you.
Okay. So the idea is like, you see a cube and you
can move it around three D and in the first view, maybe there's I'm
gonna make it up because I want to give away the puzzles, but there's
a fire and then if you turn the cube, there's like a note and
if you rotate the cubes that you can see both pictures pretty much, and
you line it up just right, the fire will catch the thing on the
other screen on fire, and then it will alter the images and progress the
puzzle. So is this superlative? Yeah? Yeah, but that was like
it was like a two D thing, right, It was two D,
but it was always about picture progression. Right, So you see something and
you're like, I think I know what it's going on here, and you
could like alter it so that you could progress the puzzle. This is very
similar. It is about perspective. It's very perspective puzzle based um and sometimes
it's even timing base, which is crazy because you have all the different sides
of the cube. So sometimes um, like maybe maybe they'll be like a
marble on the top and you'll get it to fall, and then you have
to line it up so that it falls perfectly on the side, and then
you got to rotate it again so that it perfectly goes down this ramp and
then like lands in a tunnel or something like that, and each of these
pieces will progress the story. Maybe like that marble lands on a gas pedal,
which makes a cargo and now you're in a different environment because you did
that. It's like a mc esure, what's the fucking Rube Goldberg device where
it's like, oh, it's kind of game or something. You were right
the first time. It sounds like a combination of both. Yeah, it's
both. It's definitely visual puzzles and you are kind of connecting the dots to
see the different types of puzzles. I've gotten stuck a couple of times,
but they're well. I love about this game is that if you hit pause,
they have a hint like aspect to it, and so there's a couple
times where I'm like, I literally don't know what to do. I've tried
to get everything to line up, nothing's happening, and the hint will be
like, looks like you need to light the lantern, and it's like,
okay, okay, I can work with that, and doesn't tell you what
to do. It doesn't tell you what to line up. It just gives
you a bit of a nudgee and if that still isn't enough, you can
you can increase the hint, like it'll be like cool, so if you
want to light the lantern, you're probably going to need to use the light
source here. And then if that's not enough, it's like all right,
dumb, dumb, and then it gives you like a really plain out hint
at the end, so you don't really get stuck with it. I find
it very zen and calming. I've really enjoyed it. I actually streamed this
game, and then usually when I stream a game, I don't always continue
it. Sometimes I just I move on. I've played it for three to
five hours and that's enough for me. But this game, I played it
again in Florida. I played it a significant amount. I'm probably pretty close
to finishing it just with how many hours I put into it. I think
it's cool. I think it's a really calming experience if you like If you
liked Gorgo, I think you would like this. It's also got secrets littered
throughout it, so you can find little photos that are hidden in the space
and they give you extra lore. But I think the interesting mechanic of it
is that real joyous feeling you get when you perfectly aligned two pieces and then
they animate together and you find out that you can switch scenes or move things
around. I also think there's a couple puzzles that I've found to be very
thoughtful. It's hard for me to explain them without giving them away, but
there was a couple that worked with mirrors that is more than just lining things
up. It's about thinking about what things look like upside down because of the
mirror, because of the reflection, and then using the reflection to your advantage
when you're sinking things up and moving something along. And so it's more thoughtful
than just just lining up two items. That's cool because like I feel like
I've done a billion Zelda puzzles where I'm like pushing a mirror around to like
reflect light. But I'm like, as far as like this going into this
in the perspective of like what's upside down or like that sounds a little more
in depth. Yeah, And it's also neat to see different items and how
they might connect together. So, for example, the marble concept, maybe
it goes down a pipe. So they'll be like a pipe in a building,
and you'll be like, oh, that that Marble could go down that
pipe, But then you realize the pipe would perfectly match a child's like playground
ladder, and so the Marble goes down this pipe from a building and then
matches with a child's like playground slide, and then the Marble goes down the
slide and you're like, actually, that slide matches this train track, and
so now the Marble goes down the train track. So you kind of you
kind of start to like detect all these different components to it. It's very
simple in nature, but it does get complicated. I don't think this is
like a super easy game, but I also I wouldn't say, it's hardy
there, you just kind of like you should kind of go through the motion
with it. I find it very zen. I found it very relaxing.
I enjoyed it very much. This game came out in twenty twenty one.
I don't know why what made me. I've been doing this a lot where
I like, I kind of go through different like I go down like a
Steam rabbit hole when I'm in a lull. You guys know it's a lull,
right, there's not a lot going on right now. I will on
a Monday when I'm streaming, I will go on Steam and I'll be like,
here's games that I like, and Steam will be like, here's sixteen
games, and some of them are totally not my style. But every once
in a while I'll see a game and I'll be like, I would play
that. I play that shit anyway. That's how I found Monkage. I
think it's great nice. Yeah, that sounds cool. I like those kind
of like perspective based puzzle games. Like that sounds fun. Yeah. Actually,
oddly enough, my favorite puzzles in or my favorite side activity and Horizon
Forbidden West is lining up. Have you guys done those or when you play
the game, you gotta you get this little transmission that shows a like hologram
projected in front of you of a forced perspective of the landscape, and you've
got to find the exact point in the landscape where like that satellite dish in
the distance and that mountain closer to you and that bush next to you line
up. Those are really fun. I like Fight Night round three where you
get knocked out and you look at the referee and there's two hazy versions and
you got to make them go over each other before you can stand up.
Yeah, exact same. Yeah. It reminds me. I saw a photo
once of a person who had the tobler own package and he lined it up
perfectly with the actual mountain that the tobone, you know, and he was
just like, ah, I made it. People doing the leaning tower of
piz Oh. Yeah. Speaking of Fight Night round three, Yeah, how's
punch out going? Yeah? Just I figured this might be a regular recurring
segment here where I just let you know my current status. I don't need
a wax nostalgic about a punch out every time. But what's your number?
Dad? Right? Launch chime? I was at thirty nine minutes, twenty
six seconds and forty three milliseconds or whatever, So about forty minutes, and
I think I was around sixty seven sixty eight in the world last time.
I shaved fucking eight minutes over eight minutes off that. I said a personal
best last night, and I said a personal best this morning shaving it down.
Oh wait, no, that update is out of date now, Holy
shit. I wrote down an update that was thirty one ten. No,
this morning I got fucking twenty eight oh one. So I am sub thirty
now I'm it's up thirty. The world record is like fourteen fifty five forty
minutes fifty five and what's years again, twenty I'm at twenty eight minutes now
twenty eight o one, So that's a huge difference. Oh my god.
Yeah, there's there's ship. But I'm learning all the time and I'm doing
great. What was I gonna say? I'm sixty fourth in the world now,
So sixty fourth in the world of punch out. My next goal is
I want to hit under the time. I want to be in the top
fifty, and eventually longer term goal, I want to get a sub twenty
minute time and that would put me in a good spot. Is there a
world in which you're ever top ten? That seems crazy right now, But
with the fucking progress I've made this month, I'm not going to say anything's
impossible, because it's fucking crazy how much I've learned this month. And I
mean shaving off ten minutes. When we're talking about like how much that means
in the speed run community, I will see I got a lot of work
to do, a lot of work to do this long term in the like
most defining moments of your life. I guess here to four. If you
were hypothetically to become the number one Mike Tyson speed Mike Tysons punch Out speed
runner in the world, where would that rank in your achievements in life?
Honestly, that would be above you know I did the two top ten?
Would it be top ten achievements of your life achievements? Achievements? Is that
different than like big like you know, I think about like getting married and
stuff. No, it doesn't have to be like a life milestone. You
can can give you the same list Mike Tyson's punch Out top ten stuff you
have worked for that you then accomplished. Where would it rank it can be
getting hard work, accomplishing type stuff. Fuck I mean in terms of just
difficulty in practice required, Like I was never a kid who played a lot
of sports or anything like I would have to think this would be number one,
because I remember in twenty twelve they said, in twenty eleven they sent
me the Guinness Book World Records, the Gamers edition when I was a Game
Informer, and I was like, I am making it my goal to win
a Guinness World Record, and I wound up winning two of them, but
they were both because I would see the speed run records and be like I
kind of like flirted with it. I looked at like link for the past
and everything. They're like, this is just impossible. There's no fun way.
And so I did the marathon stuff like Okay, I can sit around
with my friends for thirty hours for fifty hours, and I did that,
but that's just sitting around. I wasn't really doing a lot of work.
I just it was a stamina thing. This is the first time it's like,
this is pure skill and focus in response time, and like, this
is about the most challenging thing I think I've ever done in my life in
terms of like working towards something and getting better incrementally at it, and god
damn it, it feels good every time you get better and seeing myself kind
of just even just one or two or even sometimes I'll get a new personal
best and it's not enough to even move me up the ranks one but twenty
seconds better it. If I was able to get into that top tier,
that would be yeah, top top accomplishments my life in terms of, like
I get not talking life events, getting married, stuff like that, but
like it's just accomplishments. I would say maybe number one. I'm so glad,
Like I mean, if you did have kids, I knew you were
just like son, Yeah, you are right behind getting in the top ten.
He would. If I had a kid, it'd be like never one
regret. I think, like I'm talking things I like, I would hate
my kid. But you can't say that. You gotta be like, oh
he's great, Oh he's a little scampy. Like no, I'd be like
fuck you run. In my life, I used to sit around and play
video games and say four more. Yeah, fuck this kid. I would
hate that. Bunch out just universally positive. What okay, So you're at
twenty nine plus twenty twenty minutes twenty eight minutes is shaving off more time.
Obviously it's a matter of skill, But are there other Are there like tricks
that you still have not learned yet or is it just literally a matter of
combination of the perfect run and skill slash reaction time. There are a lot
of tricks that are just insane. They're not even really tricks. Like if
you look at like the thing for like Don Flamenco two, it's like,
I can do it at this point where I've gotten a few round one tkos
and that's a huge deal for me. But if I want to go crazy
with it, it's like, okay, so if you were holding a star
here, you get a one sixteenth, one out of sixteen chance for a
star punch every seventh punch when you do this or whatever. But then if
he gets up and he gets a medium health refilled, then that alters your
strategy and so you have to like have different strategies refill. They get it's
fucking insane. But in terms of just like the base level speed running tactics,
I'm getting there. I need to be able to be ticon round one.
I've never done that. I've never been ticon round one. That is
a major milestone I need to cover. Mister Saman's the only other one I've
not beaten Round one. I can beat everyone else round one. Once I
can get ticonto mister Samman down around one. That'll help a lot. I
had a breakthrough today with Don Flamenco two. That's gonna help me get around
one a lot. I had one of the best speed runners in the world
coaching me last night on my stream, and now I got great Tiger down.
I got the Greater Tiger method where you can knock them down with star
punches, and I learned how to farm star punches off him. There's this
well goes fucking deep, and if you're watching it, and I have a
lot of people joining my stream and just watching, like, oh, you're
just punching or whatever. The amount of bullshit I am doing every fucking time,
between buffering punches and guard manipulation and all this fucking crazy shit and things,
you have to pay attention to that well, like for a game that
was made in the fucking late mid eighties or whatever, it is so deep,
but it's insane. But as a lot of this by the developers intended
people to learn this, or it's a result of the code, that's just
how it worked, the way they put it together. I haven't looked like
deep into it, but I've heard people mention that like they wanted it to
be kind of like a boxing match where it's like you can do guard manipulation.
So like, let's say, okay, so here's the classic guard manipulation.
So the first time you fight Piston Honda, when he comes down,
he will guard low. But as he's coming down to fight you, if
you hold up, you will manipulate his guard because he thinks you're gonna hit
up, so he'll bring his fists up and then you can get some gut
punches in and then you can get star punches. So it's kind of like
trying to emulate like, oh, if somebody looks like they're gonna hit you
in the face, they're gonna guard their face. If they look like they're
growing for body blow, they'll guard their stomach. So this is very basic
anys stuff or whatever, but like it is them trying to emulate that.
But I've heard that I don't know the development history, but like it seems
like a great deal of thought went into this game's development. Is there I
actually have that I haven't read much about his develop Is there a lot of
party as? Just like this was before they knew speed running was even a
thing. It's not like they considered it. They're just making a fun boxing
game. But like you know, I mean, is there a lot of
Is there much reporting on its development or is it still No? I don't.
I don't really look up, Like I don't know a lot of development
stuff and I just see people say stuff in the chat or whatever. It's
I think it's a perfect fucking video game, and I think it's the most
perfectly aged video game of all time. That I've played this game my entire
fucking life, and I'm having more fun with it now then damn near any
game I've I'm having more of an adrenaline rush and more feelings of personal accomplishment
playing this game than a video game has ever made me feel. And I've
been playing this since I was a fucking five year old or whatever, Like
it's insane, Like I hook up, I do a heart rate thing through
my Apple Watch when I get to a Tyson thing, because like that's the
thing, Like you can have the best fucking run of the world. But
if Tyson kicks your ass, it doesn't count. You can't put it through.
So I will. Literally before the Tyson fight last night, my heart
rate was over one hundred and forty one fucking getting ready for Tyson, just
because it's like, holy shit, I've got a good run. This is
a personal best. If I'd just be Tyson and around two, then I
got a personal best. But no game gets me that fucking jacked up.
It's amazing. Is I'm getting exists. He's getting jacked up just talking about
it. So good. So it's but it's no fort Spoken. Oh nice,
Let's let's discuss this force Spoke. Have you played Spoken yet? I
haven't, but I've been reading all the controversies online and I am enjoying that.
Oh boy, it's this It might have you played it? No,
then this will be short because I literally played like fifteen I've known for a
while it's just fifteen minutes. Well I was so just turned off, but
as fuck this thing. Yeah, before you say that, I will say
it seems like some people are enjoying it for kind of like a lity.
Threes out of one hundred on critic yeah, I just don't. It is
so it seems at face value to me such like such triple a game design
fodder that I have no interest in it. And here's the thing, as
someone who's only played fifteen twenty minutes, but I certainly cannot go into like
the open world or I didn't even get to the fucking fantasy dragons y or
whatever. We made fun of the trailer, which is a really bad trailer,
and the tone of that is pervasive throughout the fifteen or twil like it's
really bad dialogue, really awkwardly delivered. But um, the thing that I
want to bring it up for was I read Austin Walker's piece on this.
Did you guys see this? Yeah? I read it too too, Yeah
yeah, And so I read it and Austin again, he put it much
more eloquently than I'll describe it here, but he was basically saying that,
like this snarky Marvel bullshit writing, like if these characters in this world aren't
taking any of it seriously, then why are we as the person playing it's
supposed to like if the writers are making fun of like, oh, hey,
okay, so I'm fighting dragons and you're like a queen and you're speaking
poem. But why like they are trying to be like, yeah, we
know it's stupid, so why the fuck are we supposed to care about it?
And maybe but then why did it work on High on Life? Well,
I'm serious before before we get into like the weirdness of that, like
you like you don't have to touch on that High on Life completely made fun
of itself and we've and you played it and you liked it originally, Um,
I played it. I haven't played it since the last time we talked
about it. No, no, no, And I'm not going to get
into that part. But what I'm saying is is, yeah, yeah,
Like that's totally separate the my point, which is that that game was self
aware and was making fun of itself the whole time, and that was acceptable
to you. I don't think I was saying I liked the stuff. I
think I was more into the action and like the gun play and stuff like
I maybe I'm wrong. I always forget what we're saying immediately, But like,
what was I saying I liked the like stuff working? Because like I
don't necessarily like this. You accepted it were tutorial and the game in spite
of it. Yeah, I do remember kind of enjoying that. I think
this is more than pushing you to see like where I understand, Like I
agree the dialogue is like pretty whack, but like, is it because the
gameplay can't make up for it? Like is that why I would think it's
more because like High on Life, it seems like it it presented itself as
a silly, comedy, gross out game. You know, it was certainly
not trying to be anything serious, and like this one started trying to be.
This one starts with like, oh, this girl's down on her luck
in New York City and el she's got is her her cat, and you
know this gang is like, you know, trying to pressure in to steal
a car. Like it seems like it's it's not a comedy game, you
know what I mean. So it's like I think the fact that it's trying
to like be somewhat of a serious story where it's High in Life is like
this is the game where the gun takes a shit or whatever. Like I
think I think that's the difference to me where it's like I didn't necessarily love
the self aware like oh, the tutorials bad or whatever in high in Life,
But like I didn't bother me as much, I think, And again
I don't want to be mister high in life depender. I played at that
one time and did not mind it. I thought it was fine. It
was better than I expect. But this one, this is trying to like
tell a story. Like you're in court and you know, you're in court
for felony theft, and like for some reason they've laid out all these photos
from your life and all this stuff and you're talking about the judge about your
shitty life or whatever, and it's just like but then from the clips I've
saying and everything, I didn't get back to the like oh, you know,
you're traveling back in time to dragons and shit like that. It's a
lot of just snarky like, Okay, so I'm talking to a magic cuff
and you're speaking in poems and blah blah blah. It's like I think about
in metal you're solid if solids Snake was like solid at snake. Huh what
a dumb Oh So you're the president and you're my clone brother whack off motion.
You know, it's like I would like, why would I give a
shit about that story if the characters don't give a shit about it. Like,
that's why I like the Austin's blog post a lot, is because it's
just like you're making like a mockery of this universe that you're trying to present
to people, you know, Right, It's like it's like a friend who
only uses self deprecating humor. It's like it can be it can be effective
when deployed, you know, in moderation tastefully, but if you do it
too much, it's like if you hate yourself this much, then it starts
to like sink it, Like I'm going to start to actually dislike you and
think these things are true, right, or it's like yeah, like a
person who just like has low self esteem, right, and you're just like,
well maybe you do suck y. Yeah, now I'm just concerned for
you. Yeah. Maybe that is like kind of what's happening at some point
is that the writers were writing this cheeky dialogue being like, you know,
I don't know if this game is going to be any good at all,
and it actually kind of rubbed off into the way that we see the game
because we're like the writers didn't really think this game was any good, I
guess did they. Have you seen the clips people were posting of like the
bad dialogue example, it's seen a couple. It's great, it's grating,
But I will also say there are some passages in God of War Ragnarok that
are not that much worse. I think it's good to compare it to other
ones because this game's getting so much shit. And I agree with you.
There was lots of like awkward, uh dialogue in Gotta War Ragnarok. But
Gotta War Ragnarok did take itself really seriously when it talked about the dad and
like boy dynamic, Like it was very it was a very serious dynamic about
whether or not like they were going to be okay and what happens to like
the fear of losing a son or a father and things like that. This
game, I don't know at any point it felt like she could have she
could have like woken up on a futon and been like it was all a
dream. Like it just never felt like it was actually invested. Well,
if somebody actually if you get transported back to crazy Magic Dragon Times or whatever,
you'd just be like, what the fuck is going on? Oh my
god, what the fuck like I would just heard what is this dragon?
Would you like? Mister Game of Thrones? All right, shut up,
I like I want to like. This is just purely for me, you
and Mary. But the voice you're doing with forre spoken is a very specific
person that you mock and it's really annoying me. Wait, thinking of this
person you use that same voice. This is terrible radio. I know this.
I'm so sorry. No, no, but let's let's let's let's keep
this going. Give me some hints. Well no, so I give you
too many hits. That person might figure it out if they listen to this
someone we all know. Yeah, there's one I'm thinking of you you're doing
the voice. I'm trying to figure out a hint that would not I'll tell
you after. I know people, I'm so different Terribordio. You should you
should know it'll click. I think I know. Yeah, that was the
worst bit for the show ever. It's not a bit um, but it
actually is like braiding me because you use that voice and it makes reminds me
of this person that I love. Yeah, yeah, I don't know.
Yeah, I don't loathe anybody else. Well a couple of people, um,
yeah, I don't have any attention of the I love term my TV,
I don't have any intention of playing it. I like the aspects of
it that seemed like Infamous Infamous three E. I'm like, Okay, that
looks super fun, but apparently that combat doesn't even get that fun until pretty
far in. That's what I hear. I love good mobility and an open
world and I can look bast a lot of stuff if it's got that.
But it's just like, man, I like, I can't even handle fucking
Spider Man half the time where he's just being snarky flying around like it's just
like, let's like I hate just that marble snark and like that marble humor
and it's god damn it. It's so pervasive now and like you said,
even it got a word Ragnarock. So I'm climbing around a magical force that
I met another giant and I'm it's fuck yeah, it takes seriously Yeah if
I if he doesn't count, I should make every game. Well. Yeah,
Metal Gear broke the fourth wall in more like a melodrama way press the
action button, but it took itself seriously generally, didn't this story did?
Yeah? Like when when something shitty happened, Solid Snake or Big Boss was
like, oh fuck, you know, like they weren't like, okay,
Solid is, I'm fighting my elderly twin brother on top of the looks badass
sword fight him on top of the US Treasury building. It's cool, serious
storytelling, very serious. It's all Deadpool humor. I'm we seen a second
of Deadpool, but everything I've heard about it, it sounds like that is
like the prototype of like, yeah, okay, he's like up to turn
up to eleven, but yeah, um he he's supposed to be so self
aware that it's funny again. He's making fun of Marvel, making fun of
the family guy thing where it's going on so long it got funny again and
then it got boring. It's more like him pointing out how dumb Marvel pointing
out how dumb it is is. I don't need that. I don't need
that, Like I don't think you like meta whatever, like it's not clever,
yeah lazy. Um yeah. Well I should also point out we're recording
the day that Hi Fi Rush Surprise released after the Xbox event, the new
Tango game work game that looks like Sunset Overdrive meets jet Set Radio but with
Nine Inch Nails music. Did you see this today? No? I got
a code for it and I redeemed it and I heard people. Yeah,
it was the Xbox Bethesza event. Shinji Bakami showed up Tango game work.
They made well obviously Shinji Bakami of Resuvable fame, but then they made Evil
Within, so people are like, oh, Evil Within three maybe, but
then sorry, it's Tango U Ghost Wire Tokyo yes, okay, okay um.
So they also were like, okay, well now, um we're gonna
show this new thing. And it's basically like Sunset Overdrive movement okay, and
like grinding around on stuff. But it looks like jet Set Radio almost,
but there's also Nine Inch Nails music in it. It looks like who knows,
maybe like I intend on playing it if not after this recording then tomorrow,
but actual Nine Inch Nails music or like inspire almost positive, it's actual,
And you know, I really like Sunset Overdriving. It feel like it's
kind of just played it agout. I just played every single game pass.
Yeah, it's still really fun, good game. The humor there, though,
is it's Marvel Humor. But but yeah, it has a really good
gameplay mechanic and loop um and travel is really fun. Yeah. A lot
of grinding around on rails and power lines and stuff. Yeah. Yeah,
that's high rash Insomniac. Did they make sense? Yeah, they give us
fun Xbox One launch game. Um right, yes so and then also tomorrow,
as of this record, last Thursday, the twenty sixth hit Man Freelancer
Mode comes out. Still confused about what it is, but I'm excited.
It was trying so for my understanding, and I think it's live right now.
Technically I might play that after. My understanding is they took nineteen locations
across the trilogy because I think to prepare for this, they made if you
wrote an assassination. If you go by to Hitman three now on marketplaces,
it's just all three games bundled into one. If you already owned Hitman three,
I think you got the first two games unlocked. I might be messing
some of that, but that's the gist of it. But from what I
understand it, Freelancer Mode, they took nineteen locations as of now for the
time being, and your ultimate goal across a run is to or over time,
is to kill four elite targets. But in order to you you do
not have the backing of the whatever the organization is, the CIASH organization that
gives you intel, gives you baseline supplies. You're on your own. You're
this freelancer, hence the title. So in order to get the locations,
like where are they even, what map they're even on those four elite people,
to figure out what part of the map they're out, and which disguise
would get you there and which weapon might help you, you need to first
in like a sort of mercenaries esque way, like take out very low rung
people on other sort of that's what you reminded me of. So you're taking
out like lower rung targets, well a, you're figuring out who those targets
even are. Like it's like Berlin style map across a bunch and I haven't
played it yet, but based on I was reading the website today and the
press release, it sounds like you're like slowly building up your arsenal, Like
I don't know if you even have the piano wire at the very beginning.
So you're like, oh shit, okay, I got the location of one
of the elite people. But they are deep in the labs on Sapienza.
So where can I get a hazmat suit? Oh? Right, they have
one on Colorado. And this is you can't You can't just go to Sapienza
and get it. That's where I'm confused. I'm like, well, if
you figure out where they are, couldn't you get it? So I think
they're doing some like what's what's the term randomizer to Okay, But again I
could be watching a lot of this, but I know it involves nineteen A
locations across the trilogy, and you are like taking out like almost Shadow of
Mordorish, like taking out thugs first to work your way up to high profile
targets. But you're coming back between missions and I don't know how the roguelike
expect kicks and like if you are to die at once in a mission,
do you lose everything? It sounds like you lose a lot if you do,
and there's like risk rewards stuff. So in theory, it sounds awesome,
but I haven't touched it yet. Um I plan on it, and
it's a free update. I want to try this. Yeah, it sounds
awesome. Like it's funny too, because I mean, Mary, you've been
playing a lot of Hitman recently, and it's in the time when roguelikes are
just very good most of the time now, or at least like, sorry,
I shouldn't say that, but like, rouguelikes are this force. I
always like, yeah, and I'm very addictive. There's no feeling like the
feeling that you are in a run that's taken you hours and at any second
you could fucking lose it all. But hit Hitman specifically, like playing through
those games, I've always thought, or at least since Hitman two three,
I'm like, oh, man, this would work well as a roguelike.
So now doing that, and I'm very curious how it's gonna work. Um,
I don't know if it's live at midnight or what, but I want
to try that a sap. I'm gonna play it tomorrow for sure. That
sends what you should talk about that next time. Yeah, so that if
I rush I want to try. Both are free if you have game Pass
or sorry. Hitman is free if you own the game Hi Fi. Rush
is free if you have game Pass. Yeah. So Xbox has certain like
visual options and upgrades, but the one does not have online multiplayer, which
I would have like online multiplayer but split screen like shitty ate. Yeah I
would. Yeah, it's still crazy that that's finally getting added to um Rare
Replay now. Yeah, I think that's cool. I'll play it on an
Xbox just to get the chimns in Golden Eye. That sounds fun to me.
That was fun, um watching you play on double O seven difficulty.
Yeah, another Friday. Yeah, yeah thing. Yeah, that's the only
time I've ever done it that way. Yeah, that was fun. But
yeah, so I'll play those two games before then. And then there's actually
kind of a bunch of like medium profile stuff on the horizon. There's Atomic
Heart that like military shooter set in like a Soviet city. There's Wild Hearts
coming up that's like EA Omega the developer Omega and published by EA, their
take on Monster Hunter but Japanese like Beautiful Japan. Um. There is deliver
Us Mars, which I think is a sequel um It's like open world puzzle
like they're describing it like tomb Rader on Mars, but based on what I've
seen it doesn't. I'm not optimistic about it. And there's one more thing.
It's tomb Rader proper been dead for a while. Was that last one,
Shadowed the tomb Rader, Yeah, two thousand and nineteen. I feel
like I feel like it's been ten years since I've experienced the fun of a
of an old school tomb Raider. I want to Yeah, I really like
Rise, the second one. I think that was the one. I liked
the reboot and I liked Rise. I don't know if I've played the role
of Shadow Shadow Shadow went really hard on like, oh, we need big
hub areas. I was like, it's like, that's not what I was
playing these two. There are these games, Um yeah, but yeah,
so we'll have those to talk about next episode. Nice. I think that's
is that all the games? Anything else? Guys? What I touch on
cool sounds any game very lightly And I'm probably gonna butcher the way you say
the name, but I think it's called Chia. You play a lot of
games that are like not immediately pronounced pronounceable, I know, and that's terrible
for me. So uh huh, all right, um, it's early.
I think it's alpha. This game is uh a kind of an open world
physics sandbox game right where you can like run around. But what's cool about
it is that you can put your soul into shit. So you can like
see a turtle on the beach. You could be like soul and then you
could like be the turtle. And you could see like a chair and you
could be like soul and then you could be the chair. Is this I
remember that game Everything? Oh yeah, where you could be like I'm the
shark, I'm the tree, I'm the planet, I'm everything. Right,
that was a gimmick there, right. This does have that similar gimmick.
I forgot about that. This game has, Like I think it's like I
think it's loosely like trying to be uh well, I don't think it's trying
to be I think it's it is loosely based off of like either the people
who made this game like grew up in an environment like this, and so
it's not literally based on these same people, but it is heavily inspired by
these people. So you were like an island kid, you're definitely like learning
from the island people. You're learning from the land. I thought it was
interesting and one of like this scenes, one of the people on the island
was playing music and you play along and it gives you these like little blurbs
to when to play music. And then it had this sign that goes,
you know, you can try and play it on the beat, but you
also cannot because it's music, so like you know, go go nuts.
And I was just like playing my little bongas as I wanted to, because
that's true. Like it's such a funny little anecdote, which was just like
it's music, so like you know, you can't really go wrong, so
just enjoy yourself, bud. And I was like playing music and enjoying learning
from these like different people that I was meeting on the island. Um.
It's very cute concept, but it's very early, so you know, there's
like some bugs. Not everything worked the way. It needs to cook a
little longer. But I like the idea of it, not just the soul
swap, but of kind of being a little scamp on an island and learning
from island people and they're they're different, you know worldviews. Also, there's
just a lot in the game, um boating, climbing, Um, you
can pare, you have a glider, which I think is fun, swim
and collect items. There's a lot to do. Yeah, I've been a
scamp on an island with a glider. The sounds glider. Yeah, the
climbing with a with a limit. Right. It even has like I think
a circle of like how long you can climb, same thing for how long
you can swim and be underwater? For everything you can? Now when did
they show this? Was it like an epic game showcase or something? But
it definitely was showcased early. But I think it needs more time in the
oven, Like there's no question that it's not ready. But like I enjoyed
my alpha playthroom, So that's all I have to say about it. I'm
I'll have more to say when the game actually comes out. It's pretty satch.
It is pretty satch. I think that is fair. It is very
uh yeah, millennials. It's going on in this photo? Why is one
of her eyes lime green glowing neon? That's her soul trying to escape her
body and getting to the body of a nearby dove. My soul tries to
escape through my dick. You guys want to do emails, all right,
I gotta get into emails. But first Dan tell people what they can do
on Spotify. Go to Spotify. We all got the Spotify. You just
heard for fire Escape Cast. I think it'll probably tell you podcasts and music
all that. You will know it when you see it. If you listen
to this podcast, play it. Do the five stars good thing for us.
If you don't like the podcast, you don't want to give it five
stars, then Max show you can throw your stars that way. Um yeah,
we always say kind of funny. You know they probably got like six
different podcasts, you know, go with that. That's fine. Yeah,
G four is probably no, they don't have one. Um, you know
there's any number podcasts, uh, just not ours. Can you give us
the five more stars? More likely that will surface on certain discovery pages.
More money, which means more cool in person bonus stuff. It's for your
own good patre dot com, slash fire Escape or firescapecast dot com. You
enjoined our game of the year and you want to see more stuff like that?
Uh money a ton literally paid for it. So yes, yes,
we put your money back into production, goes back into the show because we
love doing it and we want sure we would keep doing it. I'm can
I look forward to recording this money, just some of it. Everything I've
been embezzling from fire escape. Oh my god, strings. You know what's
funny? You make Danny beg me for money. Mike's always saying like,
oh wait, this is a you know, this is a decent month,
and it's like he could be like, this is a really bad month.
Guy. Sorry, but I do not look at our books. They are
cooked as a Christmas goose. Um. But anyway, emails you could write
into. I almost just gave my personal email like it was on the tip
of my tongue. No you can, I don't. I think I just
like ever, like you didn't realize you saw something, but you did,
and you're trying to look around where you saw it, like a sign on
the highway. Anyway, Firescape cast at gmail dot com. You can write
into fire Escape Pass at gmail dot com. Questions comments can earns corrections the
ladder of which I never read, but I do want to hear them about
our conversation about Egypt and as it relates to uh, Greece in Rome and
Cleopatra with the snake care know each other? Yeah? Were they the same
time? Quite a long overlap? Yep? Okay? Were they at war
several times? Yeah? They butted heads? Who is the Rome guy?
If Caesar was Grease, who was a Greek guy. I don't know.
I mean there were a lot of Caesar's Spartacus. Uh no, I think
Spartacus is fictional. Oh real? Uh fire Escape cast at gmail dot com.
We have from about Lincoln. What was he doing? Background? Okay,
you brought up a president. We know who you really want to talk
about. That's your trojan horse into talking about Lincoln. Nice, all right,
get to it. Okay, she's not gonna talk about Nick all right.
First one from Bianca. Uh yeah, okay. This one doesn't say
hello, it just gets right into it. It makes more sense now that
Dennis told us she's I read this before Dan told us what he was doing
over the weekend from Bianca. When Dan returned home, he described the sounds
he heard at night as hyenas and coyotes. He was surprised to learn that
he Anda's aren't typically found in New York or North America in general, this
hemisphere. I don't think. He continued to tell me about the church Cheetah
Bianca. I'm pretty sure hyenas are specifically Africa. I didn't know that.
Now I'm curious. I mean, I know they're at least Africa, where
are hyenas? I was in a cabin laugh it was late, and I
heard crazy. It sounded like monkeys at or in a Planet Earth episode or
something. But I knew it couldn't be monkeys, because that'd be ridiculous.
There's not monkeys just running around. The catskills and you know. So I
went out there and it was just crazy, just like what he said,
the same sounds, and I was like, oh fuck, there's like some
warring packs of hyenas in the middle of the night and the catskills here.
And I was like, but so I just mentioned it's like, oh yeah,
it was like hyenas or coyotes or something or Bob gats. I don't
know what the bucket is. And then she laughed at the hyena's part,
and apparently, to my knowledge based on her laughter, hyenas are not found
here, correct, correct, not in the western hemisphere at all. Okay,
I was right in Africa, but they can also go toward India,
okay. And so the church Cheetah, I just kind of realized that I
don't really know, there's like a class of animal. I don't think I
understand. This came up today I was recording a demodist thing with Jeff Grubb
and they were showing a raccoon at a live action rack, and I didn't
know. I called it like a hyena or a cheetah or something like.
I think just animals that have pointy ears and run around the four legs and
have tails. I get confused if they're not like housecats. And so the
church cheetah thing, raccoon, it's not a cat, that's the thing.
I don't know. I don't know what's what. Actually, if you police
line up all I can point it out, like that's a raccoon, the
church cheetah. I was reviewing Modern Warfare three, uh, the you know
old one, and so Game in Forma. I got flown out to fucking
some press event things, so I was the only one who got to see
it, so no one a Game in Former could like fact check me on
this. But I was talking about how crazy the campaign was, and I
was like, yeah, it's typical over the top call of duty stuff or
whatever. Like. At one point I was in a church and I got
attacked by a cheetah and I had to shoot it in the head. A
bunch of times. There was like a quick time event where had to shoot
this cheetah on the head a bunch of times. And I wrote that in
the review and it went to the proof reading process and Joe Juba was like
me, Dan, are you sure that it was the cheetah? And I
was like, yeah, like a cheetah like burst in the church door and
you gotta like blow his brains out. And he's like, it's cheetah and
it's like aggressively like attacking you and stuff like yeah, I think so,
and he just kept questioning me. I don't know why he thought that was
impossible. I would imagine a cheat that could attack something. Um, but
it was about to go to print and then Joji but I don't know if
he like contacted activision or whatever he wanted to pack check it. It turns
out it was a hyena, And so I confused a hyena and a cheetah.
Well, have you seen the Lion King? Yeahs are those like evil
twins that are like Hyena's laugh, I get that, but like Hyena's cheetahs,
wolves, coyotes, big dogs, some cats like panthers, yeah,
bobcats, Yeah, I don't I can't tell all those apart I'm not get
that. I know, boon, I don't know what the fuck like I
confronted with this, No, yeah, I'm not an expert. I definitely
still would have laughed along with Bianco and you said hyenas specifically, because hyenas's
impossible. Is it impossible that I was in the catskills and there were some
gangs of hyenas fighting. I'm pretty sure it's impossible. Like I can't imagine
literally impossible, well not literally situation where they drop in a bunch of hyenas,
but it would be it wouldn't be found here. Yeah, if someone's
parachuting families of hyenas into the catskills, then it's not impossible. But but
that's artificial. Yeah, what's the naturally what if in Pangaea Days, if
a bunch of hyenas, No, I get where you're going here, that
happened, That's happened with a lot of animals, But like, if they
were small enough numbers, they would have died off by now. So maybe
they were true like six hyenas and the Pangaea Days were like let's go northwest
here and they wound up on this continent. It's possible they've just been roving
around right well, and again that depends on again Pangaea days that they would
have if they didn't survive the environment, they wouldn't have evolved to survive,
and they die out and be extinct. Who knows, really tough though,
I don't know enough to refute this, but it sounds wrong. So it's
unlikely but not impossible that I heard about jo hyena's last night. Um,
I don't know. Let me. It's sounded fucking crazy. It's coyotes,
man, They're fucking weird kyotes howling. This was like no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, coyotes do like these high
pitched barks. They they're dogs, many they're wild dogs. How big are
there? Are they like like horses? Like? No, no, are
you an elden ring? I was thrown off because I set the thing forever
going giant bomb where I said I could beat a wolf in a fight.
You know me, wolves were like a billion times bigger than I thought,
So maybe I'm off wolves big, but they're not as big as horses,
but they are big. Hyenas are like I'm trying to think of a domestic
dog that size. Are they bigger than cats. Yeah, well domestic housecats.
Yeah, but the animals can be sucked up looking like copies. You
like, they're shaped, but from what I would compare the size of a
coyote the size of a fox. No, little, there's maybe a little
little bigger, probably a little. Boxes are tiny. I've seen foxes in
my backyard. Yeah, true, No, foxes are small, bigger than
bigger than a fox, but smaller than a wolf. What about a dog?
What about like my like razors gizmo, bigger than a coyote? No,
no, no, no, no, okay, no coyotes. I'm
trying to think of a domestic dog. Tokyotes are probably like labrador size.
I've seen them several times. They're not. They can be small though,
because if they don't like eat a lot, they're skinny little shits and they're
just eating. Oh Dan, okay, Dan here, actually googled it.
They'll eat your cats. That's what they do. Everybody who knows if your
cat gets out and you don't see it. No more. This is actually
really funny, Dan, look up hyen is. When you get the chance.
They are odd looking. They have like maple leaf shaped years. Okay.
North America used this is a headline from Smithsonian maag dot com, So
you know it's official. North America used to have its very own hyena.
These giggly beasts didn't just roam Africa in the Middle East. They were right
here in our backyard. But this was the as recently as the Plio scene
era. When was that? The fucking pictures hyena? I need scale though,
Put me a hyena next to a fucking quarter or something like hyena first
scale. Okay, I really have no sense of how big they are.
Oh wait, ear scale? What the fuck? No, they're huge?
Are they really? Oh? My god? Picture? Okay, they lived
in the North America until the early plant plus the scene when was that?
Freak? Wolves have been considered the likeliest explanation for sightings of modern America hyenas.
How big a hyena is? How big are hyena? You're gonna have
a bunch of weird scale photos here. This one makes them fifty nine inches
Jesus hyena versus wolf size. The hyena and the wolf are very similar in
terms of their size. Okay, they're huge, they are large. They
can weigh up to one hundred and ninety pounds, But those are that's like
not normal. I spotted hyena. Spotted hyenas are smaller. I went to
a wolf kill. No, no, no, no, no no sorry.
We were talking about coyotes northwest, and they are. We were talking
about the size of coyotes though, let me look at it yet fox sized
they were. Now we're talking about most adults are about forty eight sixty inches
long. Okay, Well, these kids, like if I if a coyote
was in my backyard, hey, get out of here. Would it kill
me? No? They're pretty skittish. From everything I understand. They kill
they can. I have a friend whose house gat got killed by a coyote.
But they wouldn't. They'd run away from me. They wouldn't, just
fairly, I think, so I wouldn't test it. But yeah, three
feet long, two feet tall, that's not that big. Okay, So
coyotes are kind of tiny, Like you could probably beat a coyote in a
fight. I could be wrong, I don't know. But a wolf no,
no, not wolves ever since I saw pictures of wolves there. But
also there's always like seven wolves. It's not never just one. That's right,
ring fuck that wolf pack? Oh uh, thank you bianca Um again
Fireskift cast at gmail dot com for corrections that I will routinely. I have.
I have a filter that sees the word correction and then just puts in
the trash. It's just the word, actually, and it just filters out.
It's the word Mike, idiot, completely misleading. I heard you say
this filter trash immediately fum. All right, thank you, Bank Church Cheetahs.
You can't prove it was bob Ba. I'm going to read this one
because this one I just put in completely selfishly, because it's kind of a
suite. I don't know if you guys remember I talked about Gus and I
at the Polar Bears at the Central Park Zoo that I saw when I was
nine, and then also when I came back when I was twelve, I
got an email about that. I also said both of them died. But
anyway, good evening, Fire Escape Crew. First, you were a great
listen for my long commutes, and I love your banter. Thank you.
Second, my wife and I are lifelong zookeepers, and not only was I
thrilled to hear you speak so positively about zoos, but Mike also mentioned Gus
and Ida at the Central Park Zoo. My wife and I met while working
at the Central Park Zoo and both were there when they passed away. The
outpouring of compassion from the community at the time was amazing to see as many
people sent or brought flowers and we left them outside their habitat at the zoo.
It is entirely possible that one of the days Mike saw them at the
zoo playing with their toys. They were put into the exhibit by my wife,
and that it is and has always been our mission to not only educate
and bring joy to the public, but give the best possible care and enrich
these animals lives as best we can. We are now zoo keepers living in
New Orleans. I would love to see your show. Make it down this
way. Keep up the good work, too, lifelong zookeepers. Oh my
god, God, I love New Orleans. I'll be at the New Orleans
Zoo in May if you happen to be working in the New Orleans Zoo.
I've been there before. It's a great zoo. It's awesome and there for
a honeymoon. Why are you zoo? It's my fifth trip to New Orleans.
I just love it and we've got some friends together and we're going to
do a New Orleans trip and one of the days we're talking about doing a
zoo thing the awesome Yeah right in again. Please if hey we get to
hang out as animals and take some like that, that sounds great. Uh
yeah, May Memorial Day weekend, I'll be in the and yeah, that
sounds awesome. Yeah, that's crazy that I was there at the same time.
I remember Gussneida miss him. Um oh well, thank you. Good
to the zoo zoos I've been. I love New Orleans as well. I
have so many good memories there, but I don't think I've ever been to
the New Orleans. It's a great zoo. Do it. Take a day
and just walked on Magazine Street and all the cool little shops and everything wind
up at the zoo there and then there's a great diner not far from there
bank and I had an amazing day. That makes me happy. Get some
prolins at a little shop. It's man New Orleans. Ohe yes, you
guys, is that is Prowlins. It was New Orleans. You say prowlin.
I've always said pray lining, but I was very much informed by someone
who would know that you say prolins when you're in Okay, good to know,
um Dan, do you want to read this? Last? This question?
This is actually a question, Hi fire Escape crew. I know twenty
twenty three has been treating you well so far. I've primarily been a console
game or my whole life, but the PS five and Series X are starting
to have games with lower performance and or resolutions than I'd prefer this point in
their cycle. I feel that's going to be the case even more so going
forward. Since graphic card prices had finally come down to reasonable prices after cryptocurrency
crashed earlier in the year, I decided to pull the trigger and build a
gaming PC myself over the holidays. I was super apprehensive since I've never met,
never spent this much money on a non essential thing like this, But
after having it for a few weeks, I can definitely say I'm happy with
it and I'm glad I took that chance. Do any of you have a
similar experience with being nervous about buying a luxury item, gaming related or not,
but are really glad you did so. Thanks for everything you guys do.
Justin p there is no question that a Steam deck is a luxury item
and is not necessary, and I fucking love my steam Deck. It's worth
every penny. Is so awesome to have a portable computer. I love my
steam Deck. I take it with me everywhere I go. It's more important
to me than a wallet. It has been the greatest gift. And I
think it's unnecessary. I say it's luxury in the sense that it's absolutely unnecessary.
But my god, do I love my steam I mean doing my PCU
during COVID was also the same thing, pretty nerve wracking. But this is
a bit different, but two things. Most of my life, I was
always afraid to have nice sunglasses, expensive ones, because I was like,
oh, I'll lose these and it will be way more sunken cost. However,
it was the flip. It was the reverse, where it's because they're
expensive and nice, I took way better care of them. Yes, that,
and I have a nice pen the same thing, because it's a nice
pen. It was a gift. The pen was a gift, so it
doesn't really apply. But like, because it's a very nice pen, I
know exactly where it is at all times. I'm not just gonna leave it
on my desk at work that like the janitor will then clean up. You
don't just throw it in like a junct drawer or something. Yeah, I
feel I got my first prescription sunglasses recently, and I used to do the
dorky thing where I put the sunglasses over my glasses and that's just uncomfortable and
looks stupid. So I got prescription sunglasses and it's like, okay, you
take care of me. You know where they are. You take them when
you're driving in some places and it's sunny. Yeah. Yeah. Watches too.
I have a bunch of watches, but the ones that I sort of
splurged on are the ones I most I have like sentimentality attached to some of
the cheaper ones, but the ones that I spent the most money on you
can tell, like the actual winding mechanisms, they're just lifespan, still on
time after X number eight years and I wind them. I like those two.
Not that I don't enjoy like a nice fifty dollars watch that looks good.
But yeah, Dan, you have luxury alcohol that you bust out on
special occasions. Yeah, thank you consider luxurious in your life. I'll name
two non gaming things. One is recently we bought this. Neither of these
things are sponsored. We just bought them, um, just like giving them
disclaimer. Uh, Peloton I got. We got the bike and the treadmill,
and there is something like I've had. I've gotten elliptical down there,
like a dumb elliptical or whatever. And you know, I've had treadmills and
bikes and them all that shit in them. But having something with like that
subscription service where it's like, oh, okay, I got my favorite instructor
and like I follow all this stuff and like that shit is a really great
motivator. And I've really like Mak and I really love the Peloton stuff and
that's been excellent. The other so I'm sitting in right now. You might
remember I used to be in a big couch that I bought from Box Discount
Furniture. It was it was good, it was comfy. I enjoyed it
at cup Holders, but especially like I sit here so much. We were
talking earlier about the post stuff and everything, and it's like, all right,
well, I got this love seat, this two seat thing. I
live here at three hundred and six to five days a year. I have
guests here that sit in this room maybe fucking ten or twelve days a year
and space is a premium. You know, I want to make sure I
got a lot of shit in this room. I want to make sure this
is where I like broadcast from. I want to make sure I'm making the
best of the use of space. And so we went to a Lazy Boys
store and we found this one that's fucking got the power stuff and the lumbar
support and all that. It is comfy as shit. It's very expensive,
but it's like that was a very like like Monk was like, you should
splurge on this because, like talk about something you use every day. I
Am going to sit in this for most of the day every day and it
should be comfortable, and it is fucking awesome. I love this thing.
So yeah, this Lazy Boy has been very, very good. I'm glad
to hear that. I do think that people who sit for a living should
invest in a good chair. It will save your ass, it will save
your back, and I think you should have ergonomic setups. That's worth investing
in for sure. It's like protecting your bones and your body and things like
that and making sure that you're comfortable. I'm trying to think about things that
I like, literally was like, oh, like should I do it?
And you know it's interesting is most of the time that I've like debated that
and done it, it's been a wonderful purchase. Like it's not very often
that I do that. I go, what a waste of my money?
A lot of times when you are really on the fence about buying something quality,
it's a wonderful thing that you get to have forever. I really like
coffee. I'm a pretty big coffee person. I splurged on like a more
expensive, like like a drip coffee thing, and it looks nice and it
makes wonderful coffee, and I get stoked about like having my coffee every day,
and that's super worth it to me, even though it's like, could
I have just used a cureg Probably, but I wanted this like nice drip
coffee system and I like it very much. I remember when I was just
getting into game Spot, I used to always wear the same fucking like shitty
tennis shoes that I've had for years, like they probably had holes in them,
and I never fucking changed them. And everyone was like, you should
get like good shoes, and I never would because I was like, I'm
like, I've just got to wear these shitty old shoes because they're cool and
they make me, you know, like they're they're whatever, Like they give
me character. I fucking bought a pair of Ultra boost and it changed my
life. I'll never leave Ultra Boosts. They're so comfortable. Wear good shoes.
Buy expensive shoes. Please buy good expensive sneakers. It's your feet,
it holds your ass, it holds every part of you. Like, don't
don't cheap out on something that like you walk on every day. Good shoes
is super valuable. I didn't even think of that, like the clothing thing,
like that's a recent thing for me, like in the last few months.
It's like my entire life up until like six months ago, I always
just bought like every fucking shirt I ever wore was some screen printed it or
like thick like Gildan fucking like just shitty twenty dollars shirt that was just itchy
and heavy and not comfy or anything. And at a certain point I was
like, I'm just kind of tired, like I just it just kind of
feels shitty, you know, And Bonk, I asked Bond because like I
just don't know. I was like, what are good brands? What can
I just like quality because like I've had a couple of like comfy shirts.
It's like I want more stuff like that. I want comfy jeans, I
want comfy shirts. And like even like what I'm wearing now is like a
white T shirt. It just looks like a white T shirt, but it's
like from a brand that Bonk told me about there, like oh, they
make really high quality stuff and you can tell the difference. Like I just
assumed Barry Paul Rakard here and it's like Dad, the white shirt. It's
all the same thing. Why are you gonna spend more or whatever? Like
like no, actually, sometimes you get what you're paying for and it's going
to feel better, and it's it's not a look thing. It's not a
status thing. It's not a high flutent thing. It's just like it's a
higher quality product. You know. Yeah, not always too right, Like
there are like things where you're paying for the brand and you're paying for the
name that you wear. I'm not a huge like brand person. I don't
like wearing things that have like Louis Vitan on it. Like that's not a
huge thing that I crave, but I do crave quality when I went to
it's not that crew behind you. I was gonna say that's the gap or
like equal you say, Tanning Chatam on purpose, Channing, I always fuck
that up, Sanna, the same thing, mister Chatum, Yeah, would
have been I've spent decent money on one bottle of wine in my life that
I was like, oh, that might have been too much, and then
I drank in and it was worth it. Well, it makes sense where
it's like like we had that Johnny Blue when we did the Game of the
Year thing. But like literally when I moved into this house over two years
ago, Anniball, one of my best friends, sent me a housewarming gift
the day I moved in of like, here's a bottle of Johnny Blue because
I like Johnny Black. I've drank Johnny Walker a long time. I've never
had blue and he sent it to me, and like, I saved that
and that's only for like, okay, the first I think the first time
we recorded fire Escape, I think I had a little sip of that.
I think, like, you know, if I Bunkt's new job, we'll
have a sip of that or something like that. Is it is saved for
those things, so like that has lasted like a couple of years and I
just bought a new one because that one's about done. But like, like
I think that's that's fun to be able to do that, But like I
don't necessarily understand the like I feel like there's like statusy stuff where it's like,
yeah, I think with a car stuff like I'm not a car guy
at all, and as long as a car can get me where I want
to go safely, And it's like, you know, I can hook up
my phone and I got beaten stuff and back when she like, it doesn't
need to be fancy. You don't need to range over. The cars can
go insane in price, but like you can spend thirty K and get a
car that is like very nice, or you can spend fucking three K and
get like a status thing or something. It's like, well, it just
seems unnecessary And I never even I've never even bought a new car my entire
life. I do think that there's probably something that feels good about driving a
car off the lot, but I've never experienced that. I remember, like
from a very young age, like having a car was such a wild thing
to own, you know, when I was growing up. I don't know
what you guys like your first car, but like my first car was a
Chevy Cavalier and I think it was like it was probably worth like seven thousand
dollars. And I remember Cavalier was one of my cars, and I remember
thinking to myself when I was like, when I got in it, like
put the key in it and stuff, I was like, this is seven
thousand dollars, Like wow, that's so much money. And I like couldn't
believe that I had like seven thousand dollars by my hands. No, my
parents had to help me. I had to, like Dad, my dad
calls it the Bank of Dad, and he's always like he no, he
well, yeah, he would buy it and then I would pay him back
and yeah. My dad would basically say like he'd help me do it,
um and then I would what was the VG was it? What was the
vig on that action though? The vig? Yeah, what's the vig with
Bank of Dad's interest he's charging so none, that's his thing. That's the
that's is like, what's the what's the interest charge? Yea his catch sopranos.
Of course I taken a loan. I just I didn't know the word
vig. My dad always said that the Bank of Dad doesn't charge interests.
Um. It was the same thing for like several things in my life.
I'd be like I need help, and he'd be like, oh, you
want some Bank of Dad and he'd, you know, he'd always give me
like, like, you know, five hund bucks if I need it,
but you got to return the money from the Bank of Dad. I've only
ever personally owned one car in my life. Before that, I was just
borrowing my parents whenever I could, And I think I spent like something like
eight thousand dollars a night that I had saved up for a two thousand and
seven Super Legacy turbocharge GT. I didn't want a turbocharge car that would require
premium gas to not fuck the engine up. But like it was there,
and I was like, as soon as I paid for I was like,
oh, this was a mistake. But then I got in and it's it's
like I want that car again, like that exact one. I loved it.
As soon as I was just fucking cruising, I knew that was the
car I belonged in. I thought it was bullshit. My my grandma used
to tell me and my cousins that, like, all right, so damn
Matt, Melissa, if you if you don't do drugs and if you don't
drink alcohol before your eighteenth birthday or maybe you said sixteenth, we will buy
you a car. And I was like, hell, yeah, I don't
know. I'm not gonna drink, like, yeah, that's easy. And
I don't think I did, like I didn't like And I first of all,
if I did drink alcohol like sparingly a couple of times or whatever,
there's no way my grandma would have known. But I think I got disqualified
from that at some point because they didn't buy my car. The old the
old LC got to you. I got screwed. He got drink, he
got drink extra make up for this drink. Yeah, L will get you
when at least expect him. I mean, I think like it's it's it
is what it's worth to you. I know that to some people that I
know who love cars and they love old cars, they invest in an old,
expensive car, brand new, fucking you know, expensive car, A
lot of people use it as a you know, I never thought I'd be
able to purchase a car of this magnitude. Before, and now I'm in
a place in my life that I can so I'm buying this expensive car because
so be it. And it's like cool if that's like you know, your
jam, and then that would be worth it to you. I don't invest
in cars that get me to A to B. They are not they are
not prestigious items to me their utility, so I don't care about that.
But um, there are things that I've like I don't know if I want
to say like waste, but I've spent extravagant, Like I've had like a
fancy meal once that was like way more fancy I would ever buy usually,
And I remember being like, I can't appreciate this. My pellette is asked,
but I was like eating this like moose like chicken shit, and I
was like, this is so nice that I can like pretend to like be
this fancy person for a night. And I enjoyed the experience, and like,
hell, I think that was worth it, even though it was so
extravagant and unnecessary. So whatever, you pick your spots though, because it's
like you don't do that on a random like Wednesday night, but abolutely not.
And I went to a Ruba it's like, Okay, we're going to
go to these like restaurant we're on vacation, Yeah, go for it.
I think about the money stuff, like let's go to like an expensive place
we normally wouldn't go to, And it turns out it was one of our
favorite nights and favorite meals we've ever had. So like, you know,
you gotta pack your spots. Basically, yeah, the bottle of wine I
bought, and like in the grand scheme of things, it's it wasn't like
nearly as much as you can spend on a bottle of wine, but I
spent like several hundreds when I was like twenty. It was for a family
get together and I hadn't seen my family since I had moved to the West
Coast. So I'm like, oh, I'll send this back from a winery
in California. And I was like, oh, I could get that that
vintage would be great from like what little I knew, and I could tell
the difference when I had it finally, But like that was that was that
was a different thing. It was like you buy a gaming PC, it's
gonna serve you well entertainment and hobby wise. For a long time, I
mean, you might have updated, but like a bottle of wine is pretty
fleeting in the grand scheme of things, so you gotta savor it while you're
drinking it. Yeah, a bottle of wine is like very precious. I
think a gaming like our dear writer justin that is going to serve you for
years. You will have that for a long time. You're going to spend
so many hours, countless hours enjoying the benefits of this purchase. In no
way could I consider this a poor decision. I admire you from making this
big purchase that you probably like questioned a little bit and like thought about,
and I hope you get to enjoy it for as long as humanly possible.
I do not believe that you will ever come back to this decision and be
like, I shouldn't have bought it, I should have just played like games
on lower rest. You're gonna love this experience. You're gonna enjoy that you
did this, and I think you made a great call. And honestly,
if you're in that position where like you are like that, that is a
thing that comes about every like a handful of years or whatever, buying a
new gaming PC. If you do a half measure, and if you skimp
on stuff, it's like, okay, well you're just gonna have to do
this shit again in a couple of years all the way, just go nuts
and then you want to deal with it for like five six years or something
like that, Like just go big now, don't deal with it for a
while, you know, don't don't have asset right now. Yeah, I'm
not a fiduciary, but like, spend fucking money on your gaming PC,
dude, yeah, put it all in important shit? Yes? Who needs
to retire? Do you have children? Justin? Are they going to college?
Can you borrow from the Bank of Dad? I'm glad you heard.
Can you say that again the audience heard. I don't want to repeat it,
due Mike. I was proud of you for that. It was good.
I said, more like borrow one k. That's really good. It's
just it's the Billy Madison joke. Just but the two is good. You
did a good job. Let's hear it from. Don't patronize me. I
know I'm funny. I don't need your praise. What is this condescending?
I don't need this funny? You are pretty funny. Thank you. I
know you baby left a lot. I know you both have a lot um,
but yeah, it's thank you. It's like listening to four spoken right
now. You're telling me I'm on a podcast talking to Marry and Mike.
We got microphone video game voter pills. That's not Marvel. That's just me
shouting things all right. Justin thank you so much. Oh my god,
No, it reminds me too much of him. Um, thank you.
Justin pee frequent person. Right in you narrowed it down, you said to
him. No, not justin Pea really narrows it down. Game to me?
Yeah, um, yeah, there's not many hymns in games left.
Yeah, all right, Mary, tell them where they can go to get
some hot threads. Uh yeah, you can go to fire Escape merch dot
com, get mugs, get my mousepads, Get mice pads. Will redirect
you to fire Escape dash shop dot fourthwall dot com because that's where we put
the new merch. We still actually have our old shop. It hasn't we
haven't taken it down. But I like the new shop because you guys seen
that banana yellow shirt someone tweeted today multiple banana yellow shirts are in the wild,
which I did put in and I want to just say I specifically put
those in because you guys asked for it. I expect to see some people
wearing banana yellow shirts. Um, there's also a mug. There's a beverage
container. I'm sure it has a fancier title, but you know, like
water and stuff. The banana yellow shirt, hoodie, crop sweater. For
those of you that would like to see your entire belly out, I know
that you're out there. The Dorky Christmas line, the fire Escape coaster and
the about the author MIKEL. Mhardy coaster and computer Matt Now, these are
very classic. You're gonna want these in your life. Yeah, number one,
you should get those first and foremost. Just let them know that you
know Mike as a person. Well, holidays coming up. Get these as
Valentine's gifts, so they're not Holidays are coming up. Yeah, yeah,
the holidays are coming. We're about as far from holidays as you can be.
There twenty well twenty six days from you need unless you celebrate Chinese New
Year. You're the rabbit. Yes, you you guys. We talk about
indulging, we talk about splurging. Why don't you splurge on some splooge on
these deals, on these hot deals, Hot on these deals. You cream
your jeans all over our merch. Let your soul out of your out of
your d it's your s onto these this m your wide hole, just blue
down, get that marble of a soul onto these sick hot sweet threads.
Oh what I'm just most to like fucking ejaculate my soul onto the sick merch
through my big Yes, it's pretty simple, justin it's pretty simple. Just
jay it onto our banana yellow shirt. You can do it. Everyone's your
property. You can jay onto it. You can ja into it. It
could be your jay sock for and you don't want to go to the bathroom
for tis jacks. Buy our shirts. You this jay socks? Let me
see if Yeah, it's just a sock. It's just a sock with an
actual dick on the side, so like it looks like a continuation of your
dick. That as you can tell your mom it's a sock, and then
in the meanwhile you're doing ungotten things. Yeah, walk into the kitchen naked
except with the sock on, and then it'll be discreet and tell your mom
don't worry about it, because it'll be just gree Okay, thanks sweetie.
Did you did you clean the gutters out yet? Yeah? I got come
on our merch all right, thank you. Justin we're past the emails.
UM patreon dot com, slash fire Escape, go to firescapecast dot com and
again, one of these days, if any of these sites redirect to like
new bile porn that was not us, we promise and apologize and sympathize.
But go to firescapecast dot com. You can get ad free versions of these
episodes. You can get video version these episodes. You could see my sick
dual sense edge, you could see Dan's what's he getting? You can see
oh my god, oh that's disorienting. I don't like that. You could
you never mind, don't get the video version would be subjo. Wow that
chair looked like someone was in it camera a sentient. Uh yeah, go
to our patreon even if you don't want to add free version of the video
versions. Uh, every every dollar counts. If you want to just treat
us a tip jar to help us out and get more bonus episodes and more
in persons episodes or for every all patreons so goes directly at the three of
us and to Jak Pooh. We will be back in a couple of weeks.
We will be back on February thirteenth. Yeah, and we'll be talking
about hit Man Freelancer Mode. We'll be talking about Hi Fi Rush. That's
March Resume Be four remake. Yeah, that's farther out. I want to
play that bad trying to think it for PSVR two by then, I don't
think so. Maybe we'll have be able to talk more about Atomic Heart.
I think wild Heart a fucking minute. Mary, did you fucking lose?
I thought I was. You know, sometimes you get a thing and you
like it's got Was this a fucking did you put a fuck googly eye?
It could be Bonk? I was, she put I put that ship all
over your house, dude, but it's very I was like, oh,
there's like one of those things where it's like, oh, a packing glue
or something. And I was like trying to like and I saw googly eye
going around, Yeah she did that? Does this? I think this is
you man. I've been googling all your ship and it is actually derived from
Bonk. Because Bonk came up to me without any like reason. There was
no discussion about this previously and gave me entire plastic container filled with Google eyes
and said, hey, here are some Google eyes and they said, oh
cool, thanks thanks Bunk, and I just I just grabbed a handful and
put in my pockets and I just went to town. I did not expect
to find one on a beer like two months later. All right, nice
work, nice work, I hope you enjoy. There was a lot.
I mean, it could have been her, I think, I know,
I remember doing that. I don't want to take credit for her work,
but I remember doing it to a lot of different like pieces in both of
your houses, and they were both surprises. Um. The cat one was
my favorite, though, Mike, because your cat looks like it should have
though she already has googly eyes. Yeah. But yeah, that was when
I was sitting at this desk working because you were here an extra day and
you were just kind of like walking around looking around. I was like,
what are you doing. You're just like and she went into the bedrooms like
just snooping, like all right, And he didn't question it. He just
went to his bedroom and said, I'm just snooping, just a little friendships,
like all right, whatever. Yeah, I just don't go into the
little red door in the wall. Oh my god, there's a gimp in
here. New mile gimps. All right, everybody, thank you. No,
that'd be different. Wait no, no, no, hold on a
second gimp. Someone in a gimp suit, I think is what you meant,
right? Uh yeah, a gimp suit. Nubile gimp suit. Nubile
gimp suit. That's my favorite, Mario three powder, ubile gimp suit.
Socks, blue je cum sock. God, do not google that. We've
gotta sell those socks. Gotta get them the fuck out of our house.
There's a bunch of dicks on socks that I don't need anymore. Buy them.
They're three hundred dollars. It's just a logo. You can come in.
Your heart is a rock, Aim for the Flaming f Thank you,
Thank you. Alex Greenling. Put the music on. Okay, Jake,
play us out. We'll be back. We'll be back in February thirteenth.
Thanks everybody. You could have been anywhere in the world tonight, but you
chose to hang out here. Go get your cum socks, get your cum
sacks. Get that soul out in that cum sock. Yeah, get that
soul. Into that. Long will we go, Mary, how long will
we go? Get that soul, Get that soul deep in that jake,
Get that so deep in the fibers. Get that so deep in the fibers,
and and keep it there and then get more in. Let it layer
so, let it, let it kick up, let it lay dr Get
that CUM sock three hundred dollars for three hundred socks. Get one sock the
Costco of CUM socks only get one, all right by everybody. The acronym
of costco of CUM socks would be cocks Wait, costco? Oh what the
chop the sticks style