Hey, Hey, I'm back with something for you. Yes, you to
think about. You know that old saying you don't miss your water until the
well run dry. After the well runs dry, people realize, oh my
goodness, there's no water. That's the way it is with relationships, the
well has run dry. Too many people get into relationships for the wrong reasons
with the wrong people, and as I always say, expect for it to
work, or expect for good to come out of it. When you start
out wrong. Wrong is what's it's gonna be. When you know you got
into the relationship based on what your eyes could see, you already know you're
gonna have issues. Some people get into relationships with good, good people,
people who treat them right, but because of what's inside of self, all
of the insecurities, the way your mindset is, and all of those unresolved
issues, you destroy what you have. The person try and try and try
and try to make it work, but it does not. It will not.
You cannot make a relationship work by yourself. It takes two people.
So you go through life with the person that you're supposed to love and you're
just acting up, bringing drama, causing problems, making it all about you
doing everything. You know it's wrong. You know it's wrong to take your
significant other for granted. You know it's wrong to cause any kind of abuse.
You know it's wrong to hurt them in any way. You know it's
wrong to talk to them any kind of way. You know it's wrong to
disrespect them, But you do it because you get away with it, number
one. And you do it because of what's inside of you, all of
the unresolved inside of you you project in your relationship and on your significant other.
No matter what they do, it's never good enough for you. No
matter how hard they try, you don't care because it's about you, what
you want. So you see all of the hurt that you cause your significant
other. But I want you to understand you, you and you. I
want you to understand you. Always hear me say, if you take it,
if you take this type of treatment from your significant other, you are
your biggest problem. You already know they are a problem because of all of
the mess that they're holding on too. But if you take it, you
a problem for yourself. Because people treat you how you allow them to treat
you, and you create the monsters in your life. So allowing your significant
other to do whatever they want to you. That's what they're gonna do.
They figure, hey, they got it like that because you're doing nothing.
They know what they're doing. They're aware of the things that they're doing because
they know it's based on what they want. Too many of you, too
many settle for these types of relationships. You're so unhappy, you're miserable inside
because you have this undeniable love for this person who's treating you like crap.
So you try everything you can possibly think of to make that person happy.
But you cannot please an unhappy person, no more than that unhappy person can
please you. People try every day. They stay in very unhealthy, unsatisfying
relationships because they want to be with someone and the person they chose. They
want to be with that person at any and all costs, even though they
see how that person is treated them, and you become just miserable. Your
heart is hurting because you feel in your heart your significant others should treat you
better. You feel in your heart your significant should treat you a certain way
because that's what you want. But I've told you, it don't matter what
you want if you're not on the same wavelen. Then you're not on one
accord. You're not gonna want accord. One person wants something, the other
person wants something else. You're not wanting the same things. So you're gonna
have drama. When you're dealing with the person with a lot of unresolved issues,
you're going to have drumma. When you have a lot of unresolved issues,
you're going to have drauma because you're gonna accept and allow things in your
life that you shouldn't and that other person is going to bring it because you
do nothing about it. So you get to a point of trying to please
and satisfy this person, and then your eyes begin to open in your life.
I just can't do it anymore. I've done everything I can think of.
I've tried everything that I can think of, and they still won't do
me right. They're still talking to me any kind of way. They're still
cheating on me, they're still doing this, they're still doing that. Then
you get to a point of forget it. I don't care if I got
to be by myself. I am done with this relationship because the well runs
dry. And I talked about this a little bit on some other episodes,
But people don't understand what it means because they don't think. They're so gone
in their own minds that they don't think that they're significant others will finally have
the courage to walk away. Because the person have taken so much for so
long, they don't think they'll ever walk away. But when that whale runs
dry, oh you will not only walk away, you will run away because
you get so sick and tired. And let me tell you, when a
person have made up their mind, I don't care if it's male or female.
When they have made up their mind, there is nothing you can do.
There's nothing you can say. They're done because that whale has run dropped.
Some people just want it their way. They just want it their way.
They don't care. They just want it their way because of their own
selfishness. They don't care because they feel I'm an adult. I can have
whatever I want whenever I want it. Nobody tells me. But people don't
realize it what they're doing a lot of times because of that unresolved those unhealed
hearts and healed minds, so they don't see necessarily what they're doing to their
significant other because they're blind. They're blind to their own hearts, by their
own minds. They're blind. All they know is self gratification. I have
to have this. I have to have that. It's all about self gratification
to them until they're significant other. Besides, no more. I'm full and
I'm tired. I'm not dealing with it anymore. Sometimes people decide that,
hey, I'd rather go at it alone than to keep going through what I've
been going through. And you know, honestly, I wish more people was
that way. I wish more people will understand and I'm going through this.
It's not getting any better. It's making my life just misersable. I need
out, and I wish people would understand that it's your choice. It's your
decision to be in a relationship happy or to be in a relationship unhappy.
But one thing is for sure, you cannot make another person happy unless they
already have happiness inside of them. People will wear you down, and they
will wear you out physically, emotionally, and mentally if you allow it.
No one is worth that. There are people who literally kill themselves, want
to kill themselves, or attempt to kill themselves because they want to be with
their significant other. It don't make sense. It does not make sense.
And I say, wanting to do that is the last straw for them.
But it's not the real cause. Let me say that again. Having that
mindset, getting to that point, it is in their mind why they're doing
what they do, want to harm self, kill self, attempt to kill
self or other people. But it's not the real cause for why they made
the decision they made. The real cause is the root cause, which was
something that they were dealing with alone before the significant other came alone. But
these are the decisions people are making. If I can't have you, I
don't want anyone when basically you don't have anyone anyways, because they treat you
like crap. But some people just cannot see it. They cannot see it.
But for those who eyes come open, thank God. That's why I
tell people all of the time. You walk into a relationship with your eyes
open, not with your eyes wide shut. That means they're open, but
you don't see anything. Walk into relationships with your eyes open, being able
to see the truth, being able to acknowledge the truth, being able to
understand the truth, and take heed of warnings and signs. That is the
way to walk into a relationship not being blind by your unhealed hearts and unhealed
minds, because when you do, when you walk into those relationships like blind,
I'm telling you you will suffer the consequences. You'll suffer the consequences when
you walk around blind because of love. You're seeking love, you want it
so desperately. You open yourself up to ridiculous things. You open yourself up
to things that you shouldn't. You allow and accept things that you shouldn't because
you want love. Well, let me tell you this, love yourself first,
and then you will understand you don't have to deal with all of that
drama. You won't deal with all of that drama. When you love yourself
first, you already know you're not going to open yourself up to the all
of the misery, the lies, the deceit, the being mistreated, and
you're not going to open yourself up to that. You're not. But so
many people do it backwards. They get into the relationship, then they decide
they want to find themselves after years of abuse or years of being controlled miss
us taken advantage of. Then people want to, Oh, I have to
find myself. I have to learn to love me. You need to go
into your relationship that way. I promise you on everything. If people went
into their relationships knowing self, loving self, the things people are enduring,
the things people are opening themselves up to and signing up for, I promise
you it will not be the case. It would not be the case.
More people would be happy in their relationships, but right now they're not.
I guarantee you most people you see, most couples, whether marrit or just
in relationships, most couples, they're not happy. Most relationships are one sided.
I've always told you that most relationships are one sided, and they're not
happy because one person wanted more than the other. The other person is still
wanting to do what they've done before they got into the relationship. They are
still seeking self gratification while the other individual has set down and they want love
and they want relationship. They want all of those beautiful things, but they
don't get them because of who they chose to be with. So a lot
of times people go through the drama, they go through the turmoil, they
go through the headaches and the heartaches, they go through dealing with the shenanigans
and the chaos until they finally decide it's not worth it. It's not worth
my sanity. Some of you becomes financially broke because you try to buy that
person. You try to buy their love. Every time you look around,
you were buying this, buying that. The more money you have, the
more money you spend trying to appease and please that person, when that was
never, ever, ever, ever, ever what it took for love.
So some people get in financial streights because of trying to please the person they
chose to be with through material things. So sometimes people exhaust themselves in every
way mentally, physically, emotionally, financially, And I'm telling you from the
start, it's not worth it. It is never worth it in no shape
form of fashion, to go through hell trying to love the hell out of
somebody because you're not gonna change that person. You can change. You can
become a person who is bitter, holding onto things, resentful, mad,
sad, all kinds of things because you try to love the hell out of
that person only to find yourself in hell. I didn't hope a whole episode
on that. But people do it all the time. They think that their
love is so much more, greater, so much more powerful than the last
person that individual was with. They think, oh, if I do this,
if I do that, they'll they'll act right. They won't treat me
like they treat it the last person they will with, only to find out
they treat you worse. People gotta stop thinking things are going to go their
way, because nine out of ten times they're not. They're not people gonna
do what they do. They're gonna want what they want. It don't matter
what you want, It does not matter how you feel. You'll still be
crime because you don't know where they're at. You'll still be crime because you
found out they were cheating. You'll still be crime because they're talking about you
two people. You'll still be crying because they're treating you any kind of way,
talking to you any kind of way. You'll still have headache and heartache
because you chose to be with that person. But oh my, my,
my, mom my, mind when you finally wake up because that whale has
run dry, it's lack an epiphany. You see the light, you see
real, you see re reality, And sometimes you can just kick yourself for
going through something that you went through. You can just kick yourself, but
it's all right, you don't have to get down on yourself. Matter of
fact, you should be proud that you finally can see the light. Your
eyes finally open, So you should be proud. Don't worry about the years
you went through or the munch you endure because of that other person. Don't
worry about it, don't dwell on it. It's over. You see reality.
Now, you see the truth. You're no longer blind. The scales
have fallen off your eyes. When people get to that point and they really
mature, I'm not talking about people who get to that point with that person,
because you can get to that point with that individual the person you're with,
But that don't necessarily mean that you have gotten a different way of thinking.
When you have a different way of thinking and you see things differently,
then it changes how you think. It alters you as an individual. You
no longer see things the way you used to see them because you was so
hurt and going through so much with that person. It literally shook you to
the core. So now you know things that you didn't know. You understand
things that you didn't understand before. So it gives you a whole new insight
on loved relationships, life and That is when change is lasting. You won't
go through what you went through again with somebody else because now you understand better.
People that you see who relationship jump from one relationship to another being a
relationship break up, and then they own into another relationship. That's because they
have not changed. They went through hell, all types of drama, but
it didn't change how they think. They still think the same. That's why
they go from relationship to relationship. They still have all of that stuff inside.
No matter what they went through, no matter what they endured, it
did not rock them to the core. It hurt them, it made them
upset and all of that, but it did not rock them to the court
of change. When it rocks you to the court of change, that well
runs dry. You know, local care. I don't care if I don't
have anything, I don't care what I have to do to make it on
my own. Well, you do care what you have to do. But
what I'm saying is you will do whatever it takes to make it on your
own rather than continue to be with someone who is treating you any type of
way. Sometimes that's what happens. But again I would say, don't don't
wait until the whale runs dry, don't wait until the whale runs dry.
That's the mindset you should have from the start, from the beginning of your
relationship, because you know who you are, you figured you out. You
know what you need, which is different from what you want desire. You
know what you need. You know if someone is in your life, they
should enhance it, not drag you down, not make things worse, not
make you have to struggle harder. Anyone who's in a relationship, who's struggling
harder, you are with the wrong person for whatever reason. Because people in
your life should enhance it, not make it worse. When the whale runs
dry, Sometimes it opened your significant other eyes. They realize, old,
my goodness, I'm not getting what I used to get. I can't do
what I used to do. I can't talk to them the way I used
to talk to them, old mind. There's a change that's taking place.
Sometimes it whips them into shape. Now they realize what they have in you,
and they don't want to lose it. But your will has run dry.
You don't care that they've come to realization of what they've been doing.
A lot of times, when the whale run dry, the will has run
dry now they want to be all this and that. Sometimes it's fake anyways,
but there are occasions where people really do realize the error of their ways,
but sometimes it's too late. So I want you to think about your
life. What are you going through? Some of your wells haven't run dry
yet, You're still taking unnecessary drama from your significant other because you're trying to
hold on to something you should have let go. You're trying to work a
relationship that's not even worth working, not even work a bone. So in
that case, you have to look at yourself. What is going on with
you? Why are you accepting and allowing what you're accepting and allowing. You
have to look at yourself. Some people have been in relationships years and years
and years and years and years and years, still going through the same drama.
The whales never run dry because people continue to think the same it's all
about that significant other, and for the significant other, it's all about self.
I truly, truly, truly hope people understand what I am saying.
In relationships, whatever you open yourself up to is what you're gonna get.
Whatever you allow is what you're gonna get. Whatever you accept is what you're
gonna get because people treat you exactly how you've taught them to treat you.
They treat you exactly how you allow. For those of you who wills run
dry great move on to better for yourself. Stop making being in love with
someone your greatest mission. When the person you should be in love the most,
the human person you should be in love with the most, itself,
not in a negative way, but in a way that foster's positivity in your
life, in a way that keeps you able to see the truth. But
so many people fail themselves in this way because they're looking at that other person.
Listen. I'm gonna leave it right there. Thank you so much for
stopping by and listening. Please share this episode. Also check out Relatable Life
Chronicles. That is my other podcast. I have a lot of good information
there. Please share that also. Much love to each and every one of
you. Thank you again. I end every episode the same, and I
hope and pray you do it, think on it.