Hey, hey, I'm bad with something for you to think about. How
to avoid affairs? Well, in all honesty, for immature people, it's
hard and most likely a lot of people, immature people will have affairs,
and it's all because of the mindsets that they have. But if you're an
individual who's trying to be better, who's really working on being faithful, well,
I believe and this is just me, you should get yourself together before
you get in a relationship, because you shouldn't be trying in a relationship.
You should be doing. But nevertheless, I'm gonna talk about how to avoid
affairs. First of all, it requires a person who know who he or
she is as a person. You have to know yourself. It is necessary.
You must know yourself first, and you must love yourself first. You
must be at a certain level of maturity. Also, it makes all of
the difference in the world. The issue with people having an affairs or people
you know just wanting to be with someone else is you're inner issues that you
have not resolved, you have not dealt with. Because what's inside of people
is that part of you that is not visual, but it affects your life.
You can't see it, but it affects your life. It causes you
the mentality that you have, the mindset that you have, because people hold
in trauma and pain, people hold it inside. When people don't allow themselves
to heal, they carry all of this with them and it causes you.
I've talked about it many times. It causes you insecurities, all types of
insecurities. And it does not matter how beautiful you are inside and out,
you still could have lots of insecurities, and most people do because who you
see before you most times is not who that person really is. So first
you have to deal with yourself, allow yourself to heal, mature and grow
because people get older, but they don't become more mature in their bodies because
their bodies are aging, but not in their minds. And that's just fact
accept or not. That is just true fact. That's why people go through
all of the things that they go through because of their mindsets, they have
not gotten to that level of understanding, that level of growth mentally. So
a lot of people get into relationship the wrong way, no foundations, no
boundaries, no requirements, because people are basing their love so called love on
superficial things, those things that won't last. And that is the very reason
why many people get into relationships and on into marriages, but they're unhappy and
one or both are having affairs, and some people have multiple because they have
not grown mentally. They have not learned yet how to love self. When
you love yourself, you don't do these things, yes, don't. That's
one thing about societies all over the world. They like loop everybody together in
the sense of, oh, women this or men this. You know,
they loop people in together when people are not on the same level mentally.
I'm not speaking intellectually, you know, I'm not speaking on that. I'm
speaking mentally. In general, people are not on the same level. The
level I'm speaking of takes growth, it takes self love, it takes maturity,
and most people are not on that level because they're still dealing with things
that they have not let go of. And that is one of the biggest
factors when it comes to avoiding affairs and temptation and all of that, because
a lot of people are still following the flesh or chasing the flesh, you
know, self satisfaction, self gratification, money, love, things, titles,
possessions, lusting after so much. So first It starts with you loving
yourself, knowing yourself, because when you mature, you get to a level
of seeing things differently and understanding things better. You get to a level of
realizing what's most important in life and what's not as as important as you thought
it was. You learn to value and appreciate the person you chose to be
with. Some people completely missed the mark and they lose that person. And
sometimes people right on the verge of losing that person and they realize that they're
not good people and they need to change, not for that person, but
for self. But one of the greatest things that people fail to understand is
your mindset is everything. If you know you're in a relationship and you supposed
to love who you're with, you shouldn't be thinking about being with anyone else.
That shouldn't be a thought in your head. And I know many people
think, oh, well, everybody does it. Everybody think of being with
someone. That's a lie. And that shows you the level of immaturity for
anyone to think that way. That's a lie because it's not true. It
simply is not true. When you get those thoughts in your head, you
have to be the adult to resist those thoughts and not dwell on them.
That is the problem for everything, especially negative thoughts. When you dwell on
things, you give power to them, and when you dwelling on being with
someone, and most times it's because of physical attraction. Let's be real,
it's lust of the flesh. So when you dwell on that and you dwell
on it, and you dwell on it, then you're gonna develop feelings more
and more until you start doing whatever you think you need to do to make
it happen. But again that goes back to the mind of an immature person,
because a man or a woman who's mature know themselves and love themselves and
love who they're with. They're not trying to bring any discord in their relationship.
They're not. I'll tell you right now, it is hard in this
world today, trying to date. It's hard because people are liars, they're
not who they pretend to be. And if you don't know in love yourself,
you'll fall for it every time. You'll fall pray because they are predators
and they're looking for vulnerable people. And some of you, you're so eager
and you're so desperate for love that you are vulnerable and individuals who seeking vulnerable
people will see it in you because you will show it. You will actually
show it to them, and the things you say, the things you do,
they will see it. And that's why so many people are taking advantage
of and used because you're just so vulnerable and gullible. You fall for anything
because you want love so bad. When love starts with love in yourself,
but you don't understand that. Some of you don't want to understand that.
You just want what you want. So when you get those thoughts of being
with someone else, you know it's not who you chose to be with,
you already know what's wrong. Think of it like this. Any time you
get a thought of doing something with someone else other than the person you chose
to be with, think about them doing that very same thing to you.
Now, if you wouldn't care, that's because you don't love that person,
obvious. If you don't care what they do, you obviously don't love that
person. You don't have no business being in the relationship anyways. But that's
the problem. So many people get into relationships they should have never gotten in.
Marry, and I've mentioned this before, People marry and cheat on their
wedding day, or they cheat the day before they get married, or the
whole time up to it. They get married, and guess what, when
they get married, they continue to cheat because that's an immature person, a
person that needs to grow up. So if you want to avoid things like
that, you have to be a mature person. You have to be a
person who have healed, who have grown and matured and let go all of
that negativity so you don't drag that stuff into your relationship. You have to
get to that level. And unfortunately a lot of people have not a lot
of people have gone to their and going to their graves with immature mindsets,
still womanizing, still chasing men on into their old age, just never maturity
because they've never allowed themselves to heal internally. Never. And when we don't
allow ourselves to heal, all it does is rekhabit in our lives. That's
what it does. In so many different ways. It reeks have it in
our lives. And I mean, it does not matter who you are,
how much money you have, how you look, your title, your position,
It does not matter. When you are not healed and you have not
let those inner things go that has affected you, you always, always are
affected in some way. Look at how people in this world, how they
follow individuals who do wrong, and I mean they worship them. It's like
a cult. They worship people. It's like a cult. You have no
reason to worship anyone. No one is better than you. But some of
you, many of you, millions of you, You focus more on other
people than you do yourself when those people don't even care nothing about you.
But you'll give your life for these people. But they definitely wouldn't give theirs
for you, probably wouldn't even give you a dollar if you ask. But
because millions of people in this world have not yet matured or learned to love
self, they can't see what they do. They just cannot see the things
that they do in their own lives. People spend more time and energy focusing
on other people than they do self, and that's sad, but that's the
way it is in the world. Everyone and everything is more important than you.
And I mean this is a real thing, it really is. Some
of you are in relationships you're cheating. You've been cheating, You've never stopped
cheating because that's who you are, because you don't love yourself, and you're
still seeking voids in your life. You're still seeking someone. You need to
have your ego stroke. You always have to be validated. You have issues.
I mean, I got to keep it real. You have issues.
You have to allow yourself to heal. Whatever it is, whatever have you
in the mindset that you're in, you have to allow yourself to heal.
And that's why some people easily fall for other people, even though they're in
a relationship. They fall for other people. They're attracted to other people as
soon as someone do good to them, they can't take it. They end
up falling for that person when that person is not looking at them at all
in that way, but they end up falling for the person because of the
kindness the other person is showing. They just fall for them. And that's
not a good thing because you shouldn't have your mind on someone else. If
you've chosen to be with another person, that's who you chose, that's who
you should be satisfied with. But again, most people are not happy or
satisfied in their relationships because number one, they're not happy or satisfied with them
self, and they realize that that other person can't do it for them either.
And sometimes people stay together, but they're far apart, and I just
think it's just terrible. What's the point. But that's what a lot of
people choose. So if you wanna avoid affairs, grow up. Grow the
heck up, grow up, because if you don't, you're gonna always see
someone that you feel look better than who you're with, because somebody mightter a
fact, many people will look better than who you're with. I don't care
how beautiful they are. Someone is always prettier, someone is always more handsome.
So if that's what you're basing it on, you've messed up any ways.
Superficial things do not hold a relationship together. Looks, titles, money,
positions, status, None of that holds a relationship together, none of
it. But it's what many people choose as a foundation for their relationships.
That's why they have nothing. They have nothing because there's no solid foundation at
all. And people start looking for something to satisfy their itch and someone else
and then guess what they get with that person while they're with someone, and
they find another person that satisfy another itch. That's just the way it is
until people grow up, until people learn to love self, when people make
self matter, when people make self a priority in their own lives, things
begin to change. Being faithful is not hard at all. It is not
a struggle. If it's a struggle, you're the problem. You're the problem.
If it's a struggle, you can avoid anything you choose to avoid in
your life. You just have to choose it. And being faithful that should
not even be an issue for anyone if you're in a relationship, but unfortunately
it is for many because of their mindset, immaturity, self neglect. And
I know people don't like the truth. I know it, but I'm never
gonna stop giving it to you because it's fat. If you want change in
your life, if you're sick and tired of doing the same things, then
you've got to do something different. You must grow up. You must.
Some of you mess up every good thing you've ever had because you refuse to
change. You always thinking someone else. It's you, but you won't acknowledge
it. You're always messing up, You're always cheating, You're always looking at
others when or other men, it's you who's the problem. And until people
acknowledge self, you look in that mirror and you see you for who you
are. You're gonna always do what you've always done, and that's just the
way it is, believe it or not. If you want to stay faithful,
it starts with you because you definitely can and you should. I don't
think any person in the world should be in a relationship if you haven't gotten
yourself together and you know who you are and you love yourself. No one.
But that's just how I feel, because there's millions in the world who
do just that, get into relationships, never have learned to love self,
still holding on to things that's affecting them that they carry into their relationships,
causing problems, and then make every excuse as to why they cheat. No,
you cheat it because you want it to and you cheat it because that's
who you are, and you cheat it because you need to grow up.
Avoiding anything is possible, And like I said, being faithful isn't hard at
all, but it is when you got that immature mindset. I don't care
how pretty or handsome someone is. You shouldn't have a desire. You shouldn't
have a tickle below. You shouldn't have a desire or spark rise up in
you just because you see somebody gorgeous or someone beautiful or someone who's who's who
you've connected with mentally, that shouldn't make you want to be with him or
her. But some of you concentrate on the wrong things. That's why you're
always in trouble. That's why you always doing the wrong things in your relationships
because you're concentrating on the wrong things. Grow up. Some of you think
all men are alike, some of you think all women are alike, and
it's just not true. But I get it because I understand people. I
know why people think like that, even though they don't even see it.
It's their mindset immaturity. But most people think they are mature because they're grown,
but so so far from the truth. So that's all I'm saying on
it. If you want to avoid affairs, then do it. But you're
gonna have a hard time when your mind is on doing the wrong thing.
You're gonna have a hard time when you don't love yourself. You're gonna have
a hard time when you have not grown and matured. You're gonna have a
hard time when you're holding onto negativity because without healing thyself, without allowing yourself
to let go of things, you're gonna always go through life allowing all that
negativity to cause you to feel less than, to cause you to seek chase,
to cause you to always want your flesh fulfilled. All of that stuff
comes from your mindset, so it starts with you. I'm leaving it right
there. Thank you for listening. Much love to each and every one of
you. Please reach out to me. Go to my podcast page and I'll
tell you how to reach out and I will respond. Thank you, giving
much love. Please check out Relatable Life Chronicles. Check out that podcast and
have a lot of good things for you, and share. Share this episode.
I appreciate you. I end every episode the same and I hope you
do it. I mean, people need to change. We are seeing some
things going on in this world. It does not look like it's getting any
better anytime sooner change needs to occur. In every episode the same and I
hope you do it. Thank on it.