WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.200 --> 00:01:03.640 Can capital by big pit vibes in the bell? Now, what is going 2 00:01:03.679 --> 00:01:07.719 on? Everybody? How? How were you all today? Man? Was 3 00:01:07.040 --> 00:01:19.079 can I get it? Managing? You're right? Ad time? I hate 4 00:01:19.120 --> 00:01:29.879 you really, dude? Look how you feel like life with you allowing you 5 00:01:29.920 --> 00:01:36.840 to be the whoa, that's insane. That's real love. No, it's 6 00:01:36.959 --> 00:01:42.200 not what it is. Man, Man, that's real love. Somebody's gonna 7 00:01:42.200 --> 00:01:45.680 tell you. Just give my brother this. Yeah, it's the last day 8 00:01:45.719 --> 00:01:53.040 of black history, though it's accident every four years. I think it's John 9 00:01:53.079 --> 00:02:01.000 Ru's birthday too. That's the funniest ship. Why do you remember because he 10 00:02:01.040 --> 00:02:05.920 was born on the leaper? How do you not remember that? I don't 11 00:02:05.920 --> 00:02:14.319 care about y'all. I guess that's some It's very unusefulized informations as unuseful as 12 00:02:14.400 --> 00:02:22.439 fun a question jeopardy super random? Who's born on leaper? What is genre 13 00:02:23.080 --> 00:02:28.879 or who is genal? We don't We don't got the right lin. Yeah, 14 00:02:29.080 --> 00:02:30.639 I gotta make sure my defense to take care of you want to get 15 00:02:30.719 --> 00:02:38.680 up and adjust the life of h Yeah, okay, the light coming, 16 00:02:38.759 --> 00:02:47.360 I mean, but your people will be really vain in real life, but 17 00:02:47.520 --> 00:02:57.360 humble on the internet. You oh not, okay, we're not going there. 18 00:02:57.400 --> 00:02:59.479 I'm not. Let me tell you something. I agreed to do this, 19 00:02:59.520 --> 00:03:04.759 but have no, you don't think you have pretty privilege, know what 20 00:03:04.800 --> 00:03:07.439 I'm saying? Thank you please? Ad minute? Do you feel like you 21 00:03:07.479 --> 00:03:14.280 got pretty privilege? Why so you don't think niggas are nice to you because 22 00:03:14.280 --> 00:03:17.159 you're pretty? Like I think there are there are regular human beings who were 23 00:03:17.240 --> 00:03:21.000 just out of the kindness that they are. Like if I saw you, 24 00:03:21.039 --> 00:03:23.719 I would open the door because I'm a nice guy. But then there're some 25 00:03:23.919 --> 00:03:28.879 dudes like, damn, she beautiful and she's thick. Watched me all the 26 00:03:28.919 --> 00:03:30.560 door so I can watch your walk through the door. There niggas that do 27 00:03:30.599 --> 00:03:35.639 that. That just that. Just me and my friends. We was trying 28 00:03:35.639 --> 00:03:38.840 to get this parking spot downtown and we was all dressed up as a car 29 00:03:38.919 --> 00:03:40.800 full of beautiful women. And this dude like, we was going like this 30 00:03:40.879 --> 00:03:44.360 for this parking spot, and I rolled my window down. I said, 31 00:03:44.360 --> 00:03:46.400 come on, brother, it's a car full of beautiful women. You can 32 00:03:46.479 --> 00:03:53.639 let us have this park He's like, y'all, look at y'all Prettytorting this 33 00:03:53.800 --> 00:04:00.439 ship out of the niggas made this night a little bit as a gentleman. 34 00:04:01.000 --> 00:04:04.919 No, he got extorted, he lost, he didn't have no whill power. 35 00:04:06.319 --> 00:04:09.960 Man, you already know how I feel. Our men are protectors. 36 00:04:10.360 --> 00:04:14.439 So in a scenario like that, I think that's what our men should do. 37 00:04:14.560 --> 00:04:17.199 Yeah, let her have the parking, right, I mean, if 38 00:04:17.240 --> 00:04:23.120 they're attractive to you or not, Yes, there you go. You know 39 00:04:23.199 --> 00:04:29.040 my belief system. To me, you're beautiful because you're beautiful on the inside. 40 00:04:29.480 --> 00:04:35.920 Your inside matches your outer. You're right, she is gorgeous, voice, 41 00:04:36.839 --> 00:04:41.279 gorgeous. But I just want to mention John Brews birthday is today, 42 00:04:41.319 --> 00:04:47.160 My birthday tomorrow. Thank you, thank you. I do like I saw 43 00:04:47.240 --> 00:04:54.319 him and him and a curious everybody was a shouting too. She made it 44 00:04:54.360 --> 00:04:59.800 though. I would pay good money. Justicee you cut loose like one time 45 00:05:00.079 --> 00:05:03.759 where I keep saying that, like one good time, like come on, 46 00:05:04.079 --> 00:05:06.560 it's me, how long you been? How long you been knowing me? 47 00:05:06.639 --> 00:05:14.639 Shall it's me, It's Wane, right, it's wan. Just just be 48 00:05:14.759 --> 00:05:20.680 like these niggas one time, just one time, just one time. I'm 49 00:05:20.759 --> 00:05:30.920 saying, like, man, I'm there, right, I used to go 50 00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:36.120 to place I can't play pool, so I'll be are you trying to get 51 00:05:36.160 --> 00:05:41.839 lose all my little you be giving our lesson. You're a baby pool. 52 00:05:44.319 --> 00:05:46.480 You begetting them to because you look innocent. You got you gotta lose. 53 00:05:47.759 --> 00:05:58.040 You walking around with the construa. We're here talking about apparently we're here to 54 00:05:58.079 --> 00:06:01.279 talk about love and what is it? You guys know what love is and 55 00:06:01.879 --> 00:06:05.680 what's the definition of love? Know's gonna start? I tell her, I 56 00:06:05.680 --> 00:06:15.240 don't know why y'all keep asking me to. I'll give because even though the 57 00:06:15.279 --> 00:06:18.399 first the first tour, we gave him a textbook definition. But now that 58 00:06:18.519 --> 00:06:24.839 we're like three years older than we were before, that definition of change. 59 00:06:24.879 --> 00:06:31.399 Okay, what we want what makes us love? Love is different, like 60 00:06:31.720 --> 00:06:34.680 love to me could just be like, hey, when I come home, 61 00:06:35.079 --> 00:06:42.240 shut the fuck up, shut out, I want to be quiet. I 62 00:06:42.279 --> 00:06:44.399 want to talk to me. I want you to know about your dad. 63 00:06:44.399 --> 00:06:46.399 I want to know what was going on. I want to know what's making 64 00:06:46.439 --> 00:06:48.839 you feel the way you feel that way when we go to bed. I 65 00:06:48.959 --> 00:06:54.639 know about you. I'm cool with that. I like that. I'm more 66 00:06:54.639 --> 00:06:58.279 about intimacy, Okay, I'm the kind of person we can sit here and 67 00:06:58.279 --> 00:07:01.519 watch Abvid Elementary while your leg and thrown across my leg and running your feet 68 00:07:01.560 --> 00:07:16.040 while we're watching this ships on as hell even better act of service. I'm 69 00:07:16.079 --> 00:07:19.879 glad you said that because probably were supposed to want off. Yeah we should, 70 00:07:21.120 --> 00:07:26.600 thinking that whatever number one is the only one we supposed to care about 71 00:07:26.639 --> 00:07:30.639 all plus one more right? And I like everything, man like I like 72 00:07:30.800 --> 00:07:34.879 just because gift given from me, it's not my first one, it's this. 73 00:07:35.720 --> 00:07:41.399 I still don't like you, right, I still wants I recently just 74 00:07:41.439 --> 00:07:44.120 told her check I wouldn't dare because she told me she wouldn't buy me a 75 00:07:44.120 --> 00:07:50.920 pair of shoes, your shoes. I don't know if I felt bad, 76 00:07:50.959 --> 00:07:54.639 but I like, that's what I stood on that ship though, like I 77 00:07:54.720 --> 00:08:05.560 meant it like I meant it, by something like you know what you listen 78 00:08:07.480 --> 00:08:11.519 to a degree, that's true. But again, hold on, listen. 79 00:08:13.800 --> 00:08:18.199 I am a shoe kind of shuit. But just because you don't, you 80 00:08:18.240 --> 00:08:22.319 don't gotta buy me the hype ship because that I'm not waiting for. But 81 00:08:22.519 --> 00:08:24.879 if you like, all right, babe, I'm going out of town such 82 00:08:24.879 --> 00:08:28.399 and such a go to Tennessee. There's a mall every fucking work. And 83 00:08:28.439 --> 00:08:30.959 if you in the mall with your homies. You be like damn Bay like 84 00:08:31.000 --> 00:08:33.679 air Max and he don't got this color, or at least I've never seen 85 00:08:33.759 --> 00:08:35.519 him put it on. And you bring me a pair of air Max that's 86 00:08:35.600 --> 00:08:37.840 cool. Now, if you bring me a pair of Migo Mikes, you 87 00:08:37.840 --> 00:08:46.399 gotta put your hands, you have to put yes, and they come back 88 00:08:46.440 --> 00:08:50.679 with some six rings a divorce. You're not married. I would definitely be 89 00:08:50.720 --> 00:08:54.440 mad at you because that mean you're not paying attention. Like like, if 90 00:08:54.480 --> 00:08:58.360 you see what I wear and you've never seen me wear this kind of shoe, 91 00:08:58.360 --> 00:09:03.080 why would you buy it? Budget couldn't afford her money? My money? 92 00:09:03.080 --> 00:09:09.080 She got money? You noting to hand over the credit card if we 93 00:09:09.360 --> 00:09:16.440 if we like, if we liked that, if we locked in, yeah, 94 00:09:16.759 --> 00:09:20.919 credit score with somebody that ain't got a ring on their finger with you. 95 00:09:22.279 --> 00:09:24.399 If we locked in, we locked them. Bro, I'm a nice 96 00:09:24.399 --> 00:09:33.799 guy, that nice guy. But if you, if you really my girl, 97 00:09:33.960 --> 00:09:37.320 if we locked in like that, why wouldn't I Why wouldn't I do 98 00:09:37.360 --> 00:09:41.759 that for you? Ship that mas You just went on the head and the 99 00:09:41.840 --> 00:09:46.840 bucket and so Carolina Jets. She went out and copped you a couple of 100 00:09:46.840 --> 00:09:50.720 shirts and a matchic pair of shorts. Are you cool with that? Then 101 00:09:50.799 --> 00:09:54.200 you should have said I'm not gonna buy your shoes. But I met your 102 00:09:54.240 --> 00:10:00.440 fly up. She wasn't trying to do none of that, just a lack 103 00:10:00.480 --> 00:10:03.320 of effort. But I just didn't know if I should have felt bad because 104 00:10:03.320 --> 00:10:07.039 I was like, you don't buy shoes? I can't. She was just 105 00:10:07.039 --> 00:10:11.559 like, I'm never gonna do that, right. I was like, like, 106 00:10:11.639 --> 00:10:15.039 I asked you for a two hundred dollars pair of shoes? What's that 107 00:10:15.080 --> 00:10:18.600 to a nigga who is willing to give you the fucking world? Because I 108 00:10:18.759 --> 00:10:20.720 just know the type of nigga I am like, what you don't know that? 109 00:10:20.919 --> 00:10:28.240 When I'm she should did she know that it's a lot of variable? 110 00:10:28.440 --> 00:10:31.559 Well, it ain't. It ain't. It ain't for her to know that. 111 00:10:33.240 --> 00:10:37.159 But the man is supposed to lead, so you have to know what 112 00:10:37.159 --> 00:10:39.759 I'm saying, is this chick I said it to like I'm not even interested 113 00:10:39.799 --> 00:10:43.000 in her like that, And she was just you know, asked a general 114 00:10:43.080 --> 00:10:46.759 question, and like from the conversations we had, I see how you talk 115 00:10:46.799 --> 00:10:50.320 about and you you one of them females that like stand up. I ain't 116 00:10:50.360 --> 00:10:54.080 doing it for a nigga, bro, If you gonna be like that, 117 00:10:54.240 --> 00:10:58.759 then what kind of what kind of relationships is gonna do? Right? If 118 00:10:58.759 --> 00:11:05.159 I'm like a two pair of shoes ain't shipped, but you're eventually gonna ask 119 00:11:05.159 --> 00:11:07.000 for a house, and all I wanted was a pair of jays and you 120 00:11:07.120 --> 00:11:11.480 asked me for a house. You asked for my last name, but I 121 00:11:11.480 --> 00:11:16.399 couldn't get a pair of tentiones. So you so far, you're describing the 122 00:11:16.440 --> 00:11:22.240 way someone loves you as someone who considers you, attention to you, and 123 00:11:22.399 --> 00:11:26.600 has a level of trust in you. But of course it's the man. 124 00:11:26.919 --> 00:11:31.480 Y'all have to y'all have to lead the way I'm gonna teach my girlfriend how 125 00:11:31.840 --> 00:11:35.159 I'm gonna teach my girlfriend how to roll. I know that sounds like some 126 00:11:35.279 --> 00:11:41.919 weirdose ship and it sounds wow, that's like I don't know. I said 127 00:11:41.679 --> 00:11:46.360 very clear expectations about and I expect reciprocation. But I make that clear. 128 00:11:46.399 --> 00:11:50.639 I'm a I'm a super communicator because I feel like I know all the words, 129 00:11:50.720 --> 00:11:56.279 so I use them, say these words. I know you big words. 130 00:11:58.879 --> 00:12:03.120 You want the emotional intelligence, niggas, And then it didn't get It 131 00:12:03.159 --> 00:12:09.360 didn't get one may be like I don't, I don't know. This is 132 00:12:09.399 --> 00:12:13.919 what I asked, Bro, I asked all the question are all of y'all 133 00:12:13.919 --> 00:12:20.240 single? H Well, I mean why are y'all single? And I won't 134 00:12:20.279 --> 00:12:26.679 ask no more questions, I promise because the show show I'm just curious y'all, 135 00:12:28.000 --> 00:12:35.440 and we still technically then explain. Yeah, so maybe why you're single 136 00:12:35.679 --> 00:12:39.879 and then your definition of love if you want. I don't think I'm interested 137 00:12:39.879 --> 00:12:45.960 in dating Loky. What got you to that? Like it just like out 138 00:12:46.000 --> 00:12:48.879 here that it got you to that point where you're no longer it's just the 139 00:12:48.960 --> 00:12:52.480 process of doing it, like it get repetitive, like just when you realize 140 00:12:52.519 --> 00:12:56.960 all the small talk you really make with a woman before y'all can get into 141 00:12:56.960 --> 00:13:01.240 them conversations, that's the ship. That is, what's your favorite color? 142 00:13:01.240 --> 00:13:07.440 What you like to do? That shit nasty you do. But it's like, 143 00:13:07.840 --> 00:13:11.879 so in January, I was asking to check what's our favorite because I'm 144 00:13:11.919 --> 00:13:15.559 the type of nigga like if I like you and I give you, you 145 00:13:15.679 --> 00:13:18.279 know, I'm a singular kind of guy. I don't really be like that. 146 00:13:18.759 --> 00:13:22.799 So I'm talking to one person. But then again, when you're doing 147 00:13:22.799 --> 00:13:26.840 it multiple people. That's just crazy. How to ask three people in the 148 00:13:26.840 --> 00:13:28.559 course of a week, what's your favorite color? That's disgusting? Work? 149 00:13:28.600 --> 00:13:35.559 Brother, Like, you can find that out organically. A lot of purple 150 00:13:35.879 --> 00:13:43.600 your house, Right, it's just like the small talking again to know people 151 00:13:43.600 --> 00:13:48.320 that should get on your nerves and tell and then I like and with being 152 00:13:48.399 --> 00:13:52.879 uninterested, you look interest fast. So like we went jamming for a week 153 00:13:52.960 --> 00:13:56.799 and then two days of silence, I was like, all right, I'm 154 00:13:56.799 --> 00:13:58.759 off there. Let me find something else to do. I'd rather play Xbox. 155 00:14:00.480 --> 00:14:05.399 So it's been a pattern. It's been a pattern. I try not 156 00:14:05.440 --> 00:14:09.559 to waste people of time. I try not to stay away from some people. 157 00:14:09.600 --> 00:14:16.600 That's the wisdom. Can you put some the maturity that grows, Like 158 00:14:16.120 --> 00:14:20.519 when I tell people I be chilling, that's what the fuck I mean? 159 00:14:20.600 --> 00:14:22.840 Like I go to work, I come home, play my guy, smoke 160 00:14:22.919 --> 00:14:28.480 with me off to myself. I don't you just want a woman that's in 161 00:14:28.559 --> 00:14:31.799 alignment with you know, I just said, I'm I'm gonna teach my girlfriend 162 00:14:31.799 --> 00:14:37.000 how to roll blots. I'm sure what this little white button right here when 163 00:14:37.039 --> 00:14:43.039 you hit it and make a beat big and then the TV glows I'm gonna 164 00:14:43.039 --> 00:14:46.879 show you how to roll the Dutch so that way when I come over, 165 00:14:48.159 --> 00:14:52.120 when I get here, all of this is ready. Let me have twenty 166 00:14:52.159 --> 00:14:56.399 to thirty minutes of this silence. Anything you want to say, what you 167 00:14:56.480 --> 00:15:00.440 want to do. Ah, you give me thirty minutes. That's fair, 168 00:15:01.000 --> 00:15:07.360 Okay, I'm not asking no questions. Go hand, that's what you So? 169 00:15:07.720 --> 00:15:18.000 Why am I single? Because you didn't want call back? They won't 170 00:15:18.000 --> 00:15:22.399 here for that part they were here for. They like, what is he 171 00:15:22.559 --> 00:15:31.399 sayingext I don't. I don't think I have a singular reason. I just 172 00:15:31.720 --> 00:15:37.000 haven't found anybody that's in alignment. I'm very self I'm a very self aware 173 00:15:37.080 --> 00:15:41.360 person, and I think a lot of men that I encounter can't handle that. 174 00:15:41.440 --> 00:15:48.639 They don't know what to do with that. Maybe I have and I 175 00:15:48.720 --> 00:15:50.720 posted about this. I have no interest in dealing with anyone that has is 176 00:15:50.759 --> 00:16:00.440 not engaging in his healing work. So that eliminates a big pool drop a 177 00:16:00.480 --> 00:16:07.799 ball for you, motherfucker. All right, man, go get some therapy, 178 00:16:07.879 --> 00:16:08.639 Man, go get a hud. But you come talk to me. 179 00:16:08.879 --> 00:16:12.679 That eliminates a lot of the data for me. Because I'm very far in 180 00:16:12.759 --> 00:16:15.240 my healing working in my journey, and I don't think any of us are 181 00:16:15.240 --> 00:16:18.799 gonna come to the table fully healed. That's just not a thing like right, 182 00:16:19.159 --> 00:16:23.279 But I need to know that you that you're at least willing to work 183 00:16:23.320 --> 00:16:29.519 and engage because like we all have been through things, which also then in 184 00:16:29.600 --> 00:16:34.279 turn how you were saying earlier about like just having an emotionally intelligent male. 185 00:16:37.039 --> 00:16:40.360 So I think it's like a culmination of things. While I'm single, I'm 186 00:16:40.399 --> 00:16:44.799 just not willing to settle. I'm not desperate, so I'm not gonna just 187 00:16:44.799 --> 00:16:47.600 take whatever just to say that I have somebody. It's not that deep to 188 00:16:47.639 --> 00:16:51.039 me. I actually enjoy my loan. I enjoyed my solitude. So at 189 00:16:51.039 --> 00:16:57.360 this space, at almost forty year old, trainer who it's hard to say 190 00:16:57.799 --> 00:17:07.160 it's forty, I'm at the face of if your presence doesn't feel as good 191 00:17:07.160 --> 00:17:08.559 as my piece, baby, you can't be here. Yeah, you need 192 00:17:08.599 --> 00:17:22.279 a king, that's simple. You can't be here. Uh So, as 193 00:17:22.279 --> 00:17:25.160 you were, you were saying like that, the small talk, I don't 194 00:17:25.240 --> 00:17:26.440 do with some of that. We could be on the first and I'd be 195 00:17:26.440 --> 00:17:33.680 like, so tell me about your childhood. But that's necessary and if they 196 00:17:33.680 --> 00:17:37.559 can't talk about their childhood. There's no day too. It's a lot, 197 00:17:37.599 --> 00:17:41.039 I could, I could say a lot because also I'm not interested in surface 198 00:17:41.119 --> 00:17:45.400 level. Yeah, I don't want nothing surface level. Shot like I need 199 00:17:45.480 --> 00:17:48.279 depth. And that's hard to that's hard to find. It's hard to get. 200 00:17:48.319 --> 00:17:49.559 So I'm like, I'm not gonna setle them, so I find find 201 00:17:49.759 --> 00:17:53.480 And that's a real beautiful grown woman. The fact that she cares about your 202 00:17:53.559 --> 00:17:57.240 childhood. It's a lot of women out here the only care about your pockets, 203 00:17:57.359 --> 00:18:00.319 only care about where you work and stuff like that. She cares about 204 00:18:00.319 --> 00:18:04.920 your core. And someone that's going to nurture your core. Bring a lot 205 00:18:04.960 --> 00:18:08.039 of these men, anybody got time? A lot of these men out here, 206 00:18:08.680 --> 00:18:14.359 you know, instead of doing the work to heal, they shut down. 207 00:18:14.480 --> 00:18:18.160 And we don't want child to shut down as men. We we we're 208 00:18:18.359 --> 00:18:22.640 you know, good women, real women. We're okay with you not being 209 00:18:22.720 --> 00:18:25.839 all the way there. You know, as long as you're willing to like 210 00:18:25.839 --> 00:18:30.119 like this beautiful plane, said Trina, Ta Trina, as long as you 211 00:18:30.160 --> 00:18:33.559 know, like Trina said, as long as a man is willing to do 212 00:18:33.599 --> 00:18:37.799 the work, you know, and I have run into that will get so 213 00:18:37.960 --> 00:18:41.720 far, or they'll they'll say like, oh, I've gone to therapy, 214 00:18:41.880 --> 00:18:44.519 but did you Okay, you went to therapy, great, but were you 215 00:18:44.559 --> 00:18:47.440 even honest with the therapist, because that be it's like, you can go, 216 00:18:47.480 --> 00:18:51.440 but are you really engaging in the work. What does your shadow work 217 00:18:51.440 --> 00:18:53.000 look like? What does it look like healing your inner child? I actually 218 00:18:53.039 --> 00:18:56.640 just do what he was saying, like he was doing something and I was 219 00:18:56.680 --> 00:19:00.200 like, oh my gosh, your inner child must be so happy. Was 220 00:19:00.240 --> 00:19:04.720 just like what I just don't know about the inner child? You know about 221 00:19:04.720 --> 00:19:08.960 yours? Well, absolutely child, outer child right now that day. I 222 00:19:10.039 --> 00:19:11.759 won't lie to tell you. I won't lie to you my inner child. 223 00:19:11.799 --> 00:19:15.720 We've been working because you got a lot of trauma that we have to unpack. 224 00:19:17.440 --> 00:19:18.880 Were good, we we better? We ain't good? We better? 225 00:19:21.680 --> 00:19:25.160 What's like to hear a man say that, I'm like, okay, good 226 00:19:25.160 --> 00:19:26.319 because you're not going to come to that. And then, especially because a 227 00:19:26.359 --> 00:19:30.359 lot of women, we are further ahead in that journey, let's just call 228 00:19:30.400 --> 00:19:34.319 thing like more man. I'm excited and happy to see them engaging in self 229 00:19:34.359 --> 00:19:37.359 care, self love and therapy and stuff. But y'all just kind of getting 230 00:19:37.400 --> 00:19:41.480 there where some of us have already been doing that, so now we're not 231 00:19:41.519 --> 00:19:45.039 going to be equally yoked in that. But as long as you're willing to 232 00:19:45.319 --> 00:19:47.920 engage in it, then I'm willing to be open. Like, Okay, 233 00:19:48.200 --> 00:19:51.400 I see you, I see you. And I told my oldest son gonna 234 00:19:51.400 --> 00:19:57.440 be twenty one this year. God, damn damn. It's not okay, 235 00:19:57.759 --> 00:20:03.799 y'all. Y'all gotta understand. I have known her for a minute and when 236 00:20:03.799 --> 00:20:08.039 me and her first mate saying was just in middle school, so now for 237 00:20:08.119 --> 00:20:15.119 him to be twenty on men, we had a congress, We had a 238 00:20:15.160 --> 00:20:22.119 conversation. Hits you gotta remember one. It hits me when people who are 239 00:20:22.279 --> 00:20:29.480 my age are starting to celebrate the birthday grandkids. Wow, I'm just I'm 240 00:20:29.880 --> 00:20:33.319 happy that my oldest is going to middle school. Okay. I felt like 241 00:20:33.359 --> 00:20:37.400 I got hit with some old lines night and oh me say, it's also 242 00:20:37.400 --> 00:20:41.880 assessed that how his trauma can affect you. And that's where we are selfish, 243 00:20:42.079 --> 00:20:47.240 you know. No, No, I'm actually proud of a lot of 244 00:20:47.240 --> 00:20:52.680 women right now because a lot of y'all are no longer accepting potential as a 245 00:20:52.720 --> 00:20:56.920 reason to give somebody a chance. Y'all got to not only have potential, 246 00:20:56.960 --> 00:21:00.599 but you gotta at least have the platform or what you plan doing with this 247 00:21:00.720 --> 00:21:04.400 potential to even be considered for a first or second date. And that was 248 00:21:04.440 --> 00:21:08.319 a lot of y'all mistakes to I sit back and I watch it, but 249 00:21:08.440 --> 00:21:11.519 he has this, and he can do this, and he can do that, 250 00:21:11.640 --> 00:21:15.839 and then he's on the couch with a million dollars in gt ah. 251 00:21:15.039 --> 00:21:33.960 That's all definitely definitely try to mold the potential word. I feel like we 252 00:21:33.960 --> 00:21:37.079 can fix him if I love him enough, it'll just you know, But 253 00:21:37.240 --> 00:21:41.000 you can't. You don't, like you said, if they're not they're not 254 00:21:41.079 --> 00:21:45.279 intube the inner child and working on that. You can't fix the house that 255 00:21:45.319 --> 00:21:52.160 got too many holes in it. My house and they're talking about that foundation 256 00:21:52.240 --> 00:21:56.559 in the house. And I hate this term the whole bring what you bring 257 00:21:56.599 --> 00:22:00.920 to the table, but but you do. You have to come like you 258 00:22:00.960 --> 00:22:07.599 gott at least come at at this age because because what kind of because what 259 00:22:07.680 --> 00:22:21.119 kind of though? What kind of table are you? Women? A lot 260 00:22:21.160 --> 00:22:26.119 of women, because I see these things on they just be like hold on, 261 00:22:26.519 --> 00:22:32.119 like they like what you bring to the table. And I'd be like, 262 00:22:32.400 --> 00:22:37.240 that's interesting, But what kind of table are you? You know what 263 00:22:37.279 --> 00:22:41.079 I'm saying, what if? What if? What if you're the table to 264 00:22:41.359 --> 00:22:45.519 table? What if you're the kind of table that you need to be propped 265 00:22:45.599 --> 00:22:49.119 up with a book? So you're asking me what I'm bringing, and what 266 00:22:49.160 --> 00:22:52.960 I'm bringing is heavier than this table that you got. So I need to 267 00:22:52.960 --> 00:22:56.400 bring what I need to put on the table and a book to prop your 268 00:22:56.839 --> 00:23:00.000 unstableiss up. Yeah, check book. You know what I'm saying, Like, 269 00:23:00.079 --> 00:23:03.880 who just want to know where we bring it to the table. We 270 00:23:03.920 --> 00:23:07.039 don't know what kind of table I hate? I hate that person, you 271 00:23:07.200 --> 00:23:10.160 know what I'm saying. As far as like you gotta come, I'm not 272 00:23:10.240 --> 00:23:14.960 here, I'm not dating under I'm gonna keep it going backward. I bring, 273 00:23:15.119 --> 00:23:22.839 I bring Netflix and I'm keeping I got I got snacks to ship. 274 00:23:23.400 --> 00:23:29.720 You got Netflix and snacks and ding dongs and I'm a great cuddler. I 275 00:23:29.799 --> 00:23:33.559 listened to all that sounds great, but at this big old age like I'm 276 00:23:33.599 --> 00:23:37.640 trying to build, So it's like you're gonna come and cast what you want 277 00:23:37.640 --> 00:23:41.839 to watch. You gotta come with a four on one K you gotta be 278 00:23:41.920 --> 00:23:48.279 that's my guy. I'm trying to get primary care doctor. I'm trying to 279 00:23:48.279 --> 00:23:53.319 give list no bullship. I've seen that pop up on my timeline. Was 280 00:23:53.359 --> 00:23:57.480 like, I understand you like this, but do you know who your primary 281 00:23:57.519 --> 00:24:02.519 caregiver is? When I tell you? That was probably the most quietest post 282 00:24:02.759 --> 00:24:07.359 I ever seen, because it's real. Can we log into your my chart? 283 00:24:07.519 --> 00:24:12.599 Yo? But it's real ship though, because like I look at it 284 00:24:12.680 --> 00:24:15.839 like I'm thirty five, and then I look at the questions and the conversations 285 00:24:15.880 --> 00:24:19.160 that I have with women now versus what I was talking to bitches about when 286 00:24:19.200 --> 00:24:23.480 I was like eighteen nineteen. Right, you've got chill, bro. We 287 00:24:23.519 --> 00:24:29.079 don't love to bitches and hoes. I'm trying to get that up well, 288 00:24:29.119 --> 00:24:34.759 like versus I'm just saying so long. My sister said, I'm a marble 289 00:24:34.799 --> 00:24:37.480 table. I'm hard to break and strong and I can hold my own. 290 00:24:37.599 --> 00:24:51.160 That's right, that's a bar that shirt. I think about the because he's 291 00:24:51.160 --> 00:24:56.160 been waiting pay go ahead, she asked the question, I ain't met him 292 00:24:56.200 --> 00:25:03.200 yet, Okay, your turn. I had a it's hard to follow that, 293 00:25:03.240 --> 00:25:10.640 she said, And I ain't met him yet. That's like going to 294 00:25:10.720 --> 00:25:15.039 prices, right, and say two thousand and one because the person before you 295 00:25:15.039 --> 00:25:25.000 said two thousands? Why am I single? I mean, I don't be 296 00:25:25.079 --> 00:25:27.480 doing nothing? Are you actually a good dude? Johnny? You check a 297 00:25:27.519 --> 00:25:36.039 lot of boxes. Crazy. The fact that you got on sweats got on 298 00:25:36.119 --> 00:25:40.799 sweats today threw me the funk off because you he's normally a well dressed, 299 00:25:40.880 --> 00:25:45.680 well kept gentleman. Naturally he comes in suiting, ties, prestige, he 300 00:25:45.799 --> 00:25:52.160 got manners. He's what women want when they create a create a man. 301 00:25:52.920 --> 00:25:59.160 So now I have a question, man, I feel, which is why 302 00:25:59.240 --> 00:26:02.960 Johnny got it like here. So my question I have to ask this for 303 00:26:03.680 --> 00:26:07.279 in that position for you, what type of women are you running into? 304 00:26:07.480 --> 00:26:12.079 Because to me, a man does a man does the choosing. Of course 305 00:26:12.119 --> 00:26:15.960 a woman chooses as well, but I'm all about a man being a leader 306 00:26:17.000 --> 00:26:21.519 in my life. So as a man that would choose his spouse, there's 307 00:26:21.559 --> 00:26:23.119 so many women out here they will look at you as a good man. 308 00:26:25.119 --> 00:26:26.759 What type of women are you running into? So? Okay, So, 309 00:26:26.960 --> 00:26:30.000 like you said, I'm thirty seven, so I'm moving towards for you. 310 00:26:30.079 --> 00:26:37.680 I read thirty seven thirty seven, but you know I'm moving that for me 311 00:26:37.920 --> 00:26:42.880 like you said, you're building out of built, So I don't want somebody 312 00:26:42.880 --> 00:26:48.319 that's building to be too too. I mean that sounds but it's sometimes it's 313 00:26:48.319 --> 00:26:52.839 just really the truth. Like I don't want somebody I have to because generally 314 00:26:52.079 --> 00:26:57.640 if she's building, she wants to use my resources to build. Right, 315 00:26:57.759 --> 00:27:00.759 it ain't nothing wrong with that. But I really like you. And sometimes 316 00:27:00.960 --> 00:27:06.039 they be wanting that ship like the third day you met him. But you 317 00:27:06.079 --> 00:27:07.559 know what I'm saying. Sometimes the third message all to sit between each other. 318 00:27:07.559 --> 00:27:11.359 It'll be like, oh, hey, I help I need can you 319 00:27:11.359 --> 00:27:14.880 help me? Can you? And that's fine, Like and if you ain't 320 00:27:14.920 --> 00:27:17.559 got an operations, you need to comedies. That's what I'm a financial advisor. 321 00:27:17.559 --> 00:27:19.400 That's what I do. But that's part of what I do. Let 322 00:27:19.400 --> 00:27:22.279 me put it like that. But I just tell people all the time, 323 00:27:22.359 --> 00:27:27.000 like there's a lot of important things that we haven't learned. And then you 324 00:27:27.119 --> 00:27:30.200 need to be willing to learn that, right, Like you said, man 325 00:27:30.400 --> 00:27:32.640 to be he has to have gone to therapy. You have to really work 326 00:27:32.680 --> 00:27:33.759 on themselves. I did all that. I did that. I did that 327 00:27:33.799 --> 00:27:37.279 when I was twenty five, so this is a long time. I did 328 00:27:37.319 --> 00:27:40.240 it before the women was doing that. So there's a lot of things that 329 00:27:41.160 --> 00:27:42.960 if you're talking about being equally open and stuff like that, it is hard 330 00:27:42.960 --> 00:27:45.599 to find. And I'm not the ship. It's just and I'm not saying 331 00:27:45.640 --> 00:27:48.880 I'm insali. I don't know, but I'm just saying, like I'm a 332 00:27:48.920 --> 00:27:52.519 regularly dude. But it's just be crazy to me. Sometimes I'd be like, 333 00:27:53.720 --> 00:27:57.160 that's that's not it that some people a lot of people overvalue themselves, 334 00:27:57.440 --> 00:28:00.559 said, I must say, had to really self aware person too, So 335 00:28:00.680 --> 00:28:03.960 like, and I've been through I have some very unique experiences in life and 336 00:28:04.000 --> 00:28:07.880 things I've been through that nobody else has or nobody that I know. So 337 00:28:07.920 --> 00:28:14.200 that's some stuff that it's unique to me. But you gotta work fast, 338 00:28:14.240 --> 00:28:17.519 you gotta work through it. You have to level up yourself. And it's 339 00:28:17.559 --> 00:28:21.319 wild to me how many people are broken and unhealed and fucked up and they 340 00:28:21.480 --> 00:28:27.079 be like, hey, come join in, bring it's a yeah, it's 341 00:28:27.079 --> 00:28:33.000 a paid party. Yeah, stuff like that, Like you're trauma bonding sick. 342 00:28:33.880 --> 00:28:38.799 That's so sick. People got marble tabletops and rotted wood legs, you 343 00:28:38.799 --> 00:28:47.039 know what I'm I mean? Looking like you look good up here, right? 344 00:28:47.160 --> 00:28:52.480 You like like you just gotta I feel like a lot of people don't 345 00:28:52.519 --> 00:28:59.839 have all their bases covered, and then what you are you trying to get 346 00:28:59.839 --> 00:29:00.960 in to it and all mine ain't even cover. But when you try to 347 00:29:02.000 --> 00:29:04.599 get into it, they're not even willing to have the conversation, particularly with 348 00:29:04.680 --> 00:29:11.440 women. You're looking like women that's willing to learn what she doesn't know. 349 00:29:12.039 --> 00:29:17.279 Yeah, a lot of us struggle and I'm not and I'm not I'm not 350 00:29:17.319 --> 00:29:21.240 a the way I can communicate and talk to people. I'm never you know, 351 00:29:21.480 --> 00:29:23.559 I don't talk down to anybody. I don't degrade anybody. I don't 352 00:29:23.559 --> 00:29:30.359 disrespect anybody. But it's really hard. It's really hard to challenge somebody's self 353 00:29:30.400 --> 00:29:34.559 image hmm, particularly when it's a woman, because it becomes an emotional thing. 354 00:29:34.799 --> 00:29:40.200 They're not a logical thing. This this is tangible. This is and 355 00:29:40.240 --> 00:29:44.160 how you feel about it as a relevant Like I told the woman I was 356 00:29:44.240 --> 00:29:45.599 dating for like six months, I said, you need to get your credit 357 00:29:45.640 --> 00:29:48.599 score up because if you you talk about marriage and you're not gonna bring my 358 00:29:48.640 --> 00:29:52.759 ship down. I'm not for I've worked hard for a long time and there's 359 00:29:53.440 --> 00:29:56.359 people got all my ass about that that's that's crazy. Why would you just 360 00:29:56.400 --> 00:30:04.839 like because I have earned out my seven seventy that's crazy. Man, Man 361 00:30:06.759 --> 00:30:11.200 together, if I'm not quite there and you and you, I can learn 362 00:30:11.240 --> 00:30:15.039 from you, that's very attractive about you. I love a man I can 363 00:30:15.119 --> 00:30:18.039 learn from see me. I believe a man is supposed to lift a woman 364 00:30:18.200 --> 00:30:22.119 up. Absolutely. I want to look up to my man. So for 365 00:30:22.200 --> 00:30:25.680 me, that's what's going to happen for me. But clearly there was something 366 00:30:25.680 --> 00:30:32.000 else lacking where you didn't feel the desire to continue to pour into that woman, 367 00:30:32.240 --> 00:30:33.960 or you didn't see the potential because at the end of the day, 368 00:30:34.000 --> 00:30:40.519 you don't have to do it there. Vulnerability is very attractive, and pride 369 00:30:40.720 --> 00:30:42.680 is not to be like, hey, we needed this is what you want. 370 00:30:42.759 --> 00:30:45.880 You told me you want to do this. Yeah, this is how 371 00:30:45.920 --> 00:30:48.000 you get there, get there. I'm not doing none of that. Ship 372 00:30:48.519 --> 00:30:56.960 okay, marriage, So a lot of us not just a lot of us 373 00:30:56.079 --> 00:31:00.960 moving, and it's like and that gets in the way of a lot of 374 00:31:00.000 --> 00:31:03.640 things. I had a man called me. He said that he was like, 375 00:31:03.279 --> 00:31:07.559 he was like, you moved so much your egos But I was like, 376 00:31:07.559 --> 00:31:11.680 oh wait a minute, he might be right. Yeah, probably not 377 00:31:11.079 --> 00:31:15.000 what he said. I was like, can I can kind of see how 378 00:31:15.000 --> 00:31:18.640 you say? That's sure you're going on thirty wouldn't have said the same thing 379 00:31:18.680 --> 00:31:21.880 though, right see, you know what I'm saying. So there's a lot 380 00:31:21.880 --> 00:31:27.759 of shitty time. I'm trying to ask them question because you said ego. 381 00:31:29.000 --> 00:31:30.839 He was talking about your ego? Was it your ego? Was it a 382 00:31:30.880 --> 00:31:37.880 protective mechanism? You know what? Did you really examine that and identify what 383 00:31:37.920 --> 00:31:40.400 it was? I can't even remember what happened. I just remember being I 384 00:31:40.440 --> 00:31:44.039 was a lot of time for a woman. Indeed, like a lot of 385 00:31:44.039 --> 00:31:47.279 times for a woman. It's just our protective mechanism. I'm very guarded, 386 00:31:47.319 --> 00:31:56.559 and a lot of a lot of men move around with that. I'll be 387 00:31:56.640 --> 00:32:00.200 like, I see through it, like because I am a man too, 388 00:32:00.279 --> 00:32:02.519 Like I know, I know the fasage you're putting up. I mean, 389 00:32:02.559 --> 00:32:06.079 you do need it, you do need your a little bit. I'm not 390 00:32:07.319 --> 00:32:10.839 abandon it, but you know, but like my guard is up very high. 391 00:32:10.839 --> 00:32:15.920 That's another thing, Like I'm not willing to let it come down too 392 00:32:15.960 --> 00:32:19.079 far. So this is my thing. We talked about this two years ago 393 00:32:19.200 --> 00:32:22.759 when I was here last time, My other thing is like people and I 394 00:32:22.759 --> 00:32:25.039 I say men, but I feel like people women do this too. People 395 00:32:25.039 --> 00:32:30.720 show up as they representative and that's my other thing. While that guard don't 396 00:32:30.720 --> 00:32:32.640 come down to fact, I literally be like, hm, this is cute, 397 00:32:32.640 --> 00:32:36.839 and I like all the things in it's first like three months, I 398 00:32:36.880 --> 00:32:39.720 need to see who you let it starts to unravel in like three months. 399 00:32:40.160 --> 00:32:44.480 That's who I want to meet and see and talk to and like, because 400 00:32:44.720 --> 00:32:47.359 it's like you're trying to impress each other and like people just don't show up 401 00:32:47.400 --> 00:32:52.680 as their true, authentic selves and I think that's where that's where people struggle. 402 00:32:52.680 --> 00:32:54.519 So like I'm self aware and like I'm like, I'm not I'm not 403 00:32:54.559 --> 00:32:58.880 going to show up as anything other than training. Like who what you see 404 00:32:58.960 --> 00:33:00.480 is what you get. I'm not seeing. You're like trying to be something 405 00:33:00.519 --> 00:33:02.920 that I'm not. Like, I've been through a lot of ship. This 406 00:33:04.000 --> 00:33:06.240 is where I'm at. Either meet me where I'm at, or you can 407 00:33:06.319 --> 00:33:09.880 keep it moving. It's really a solution to that because there's so many people 408 00:33:09.880 --> 00:33:13.880 in the world, you know, we definitely want to date. What's the 409 00:33:13.920 --> 00:33:16.559 solution to that? My answer would be time, Like we just you just 410 00:33:16.640 --> 00:33:20.920 have to give a time, like letting the guard down, to get to 411 00:33:21.039 --> 00:33:25.240 know that person, see who that person really is. When they're wag, 412 00:33:25.440 --> 00:33:29.599 don't got money, you know, whatever it is, it's gonna come out 413 00:33:29.640 --> 00:33:31.680 in those different scenarios. And that's what I always say that though. I'm 414 00:33:31.680 --> 00:33:35.640 like, I need to see you in all seasons. Yeah, yes, 415 00:33:36.240 --> 00:33:38.519 so all that that cute. Okay, it's cute. Yeah, I like 416 00:33:38.599 --> 00:33:40.720 you and all that, but it's like, I want to see you when 417 00:33:40.680 --> 00:33:47.319 you're mad, when you sad, when you broke, but when you gotta 418 00:33:47.400 --> 00:34:02.359 see when I don't want, I don't want you got and they just yeah, 419 00:34:02.440 --> 00:34:06.160 yeah, I can't. I need to see all that before, you 420 00:34:06.200 --> 00:34:08.840 know. And also I'm one to probably rare. I don't want to get 421 00:34:08.840 --> 00:34:14.920 married. I have no desire for marriage. It's very rare. And and 422 00:34:15.000 --> 00:34:22.159 a lot of men don't like, yeah, do I look like a white? 423 00:34:25.039 --> 00:34:29.280 I don't know why you don't want to be a white? I don't 424 00:34:29.280 --> 00:34:35.239 want to be. Okay, So here's my thing. I'm not I'm not 425 00:34:35.559 --> 00:34:42.320 totally opposed to it, right, I'm leaving a door open. I absolutely 426 00:34:42.360 --> 00:34:45.239 don't want to do this. I just don't have a desire to do it 427 00:34:45.320 --> 00:34:47.480 because from Number one, I haven't seen enough healthy examples of it that makes 428 00:34:47.480 --> 00:34:50.559 me want to do it. Everything that I've seen, I'm like, y'all 429 00:34:50.760 --> 00:34:55.000 keep that I'm good. Number two for women particularly, I feel like marriage 430 00:34:55.000 --> 00:35:00.039 and motherhood is very self sacrificial. I've already I've been helping take care of 431 00:35:00.079 --> 00:35:02.679 people since i was ten years old. I'm the oldest of my family, 432 00:35:02.719 --> 00:35:06.280 so I have younger siblings. Then I messed around and had a baby when 433 00:35:06.280 --> 00:35:07.760 I was eighteen, moved out when I was nineteen with their dad. We 434 00:35:07.800 --> 00:35:14.360 have more kids, so I've kind of done a lot of that area taking 435 00:35:14.400 --> 00:35:16.719 care of other people. So now I'm in a space my kids are older 436 00:35:16.760 --> 00:35:20.199 that I'm like, dang, what does it look like for Trina to just 437 00:35:20.239 --> 00:35:22.880 do training? I don't know what that looks or feels like, so I 438 00:35:22.880 --> 00:35:25.719 don't really have a desire to do that. I have a desire for partnership. 439 00:35:25.719 --> 00:35:28.880 I just don't think it has to look like what everybody else is. 440 00:35:29.679 --> 00:35:32.039 But that that's the one thing about marriage, and a lot of people get 441 00:35:32.039 --> 00:35:37.480 confused. Marriage doesn't look the same for everybody either, because you you might 442 00:35:37.559 --> 00:35:40.000 get prime example, you hear about people who've been married two, three, 443 00:35:40.159 --> 00:35:44.119 four times, and we're like, Bro, you don't seem to get it 444 00:35:44.199 --> 00:35:47.079 right. Why do you keep getting married? Because every single marriage is different 445 00:35:47.519 --> 00:35:52.599 for him. So you in the greatest age of the forties right now, 446 00:35:52.880 --> 00:35:57.000 you may fit me the man to be like, you know what, I 447 00:35:57.039 --> 00:36:00.679 want partnership with you. But because I got these as when I'm out of 448 00:36:00.719 --> 00:36:04.599 here, I don't want you to be without. Yeah, so that marriage 449 00:36:04.639 --> 00:36:07.119 could be more so long term stability, you know, because at the end 450 00:36:07.119 --> 00:36:10.559 of the day, marriage is really more financial. It's a business. So 451 00:36:10.679 --> 00:36:15.039 if you're already doing the partnership, the love we're together, let's just go 452 00:36:15.119 --> 00:36:19.000 ahead and slap the business. And I'm open to that. I just I'm 453 00:36:19.039 --> 00:36:21.679 not in a rush to do it. I don't really have a desire to 454 00:36:21.719 --> 00:36:22.840 do it, but I'm not totally closed off to it. It just has 455 00:36:22.920 --> 00:36:27.039 it would have to look and feel good for us. Like my biggest thing, 456 00:36:27.079 --> 00:36:29.599 I always say, do what feels good to your spirit and yourself. 457 00:36:29.719 --> 00:36:31.800 I'm not really interested. I've never I'm a very free spirited, out the 458 00:36:31.800 --> 00:36:37.679 box type of person. I'm not interested in being in anybody's boxy just be 459 00:36:37.760 --> 00:36:40.599 free. So basically, what you're saying is four years and then he ain't 460 00:36:40.639 --> 00:36:45.440 popped. Question, you ain't tripping. It depends on what we've discussed and 461 00:36:45.480 --> 00:36:47.840 what we've talked about. I always said, if I did get married, 462 00:36:47.840 --> 00:36:51.239 I'm probably going to be an older bride. It probably would be when my 463 00:36:51.320 --> 00:36:53.960 kids are older, just because like then, also, I don't want to 464 00:36:53.960 --> 00:36:58.519 do the Brady Bunch thing. I don't want to. Yeah, I don't 465 00:36:58.519 --> 00:37:02.239 want to now because my kids again, I have twenty year old, fifteen 466 00:37:02.239 --> 00:37:06.039 and a ten year old, Like, I just have no interest in doing 467 00:37:06.079 --> 00:37:09.440 all like I don't want to do. Okay, I got a question. 468 00:37:10.079 --> 00:37:15.920 So when you understand some of the ship that you not gonna be like, 469 00:37:16.159 --> 00:37:20.599 this is what I'm not into. I ain't doing that to do, Like, 470 00:37:20.719 --> 00:37:23.480 are you self aware enough to know that? Like the dating pool kind 471 00:37:23.480 --> 00:37:28.440 of shrinks when you start to pick and choose at what you will want, 472 00:37:28.960 --> 00:37:30.079 you know, deal with, and I think a lot of people will be 473 00:37:30.800 --> 00:37:35.119 I don't want this. But then you get in the regular sized pool looking 474 00:37:35.159 --> 00:37:37.559 for what you want, Like that's not gonna work. You're gonna be subjected 475 00:37:37.599 --> 00:37:42.639 to everybody because you didn't shrink your data. You gotta go, you gotta 476 00:37:42.920 --> 00:37:45.599 I feel like there's nothing wrong what you want right, No, it's not 477 00:37:45.639 --> 00:37:50.639 wrong. I just people don't understand that when you start putting your standards and 478 00:37:50.719 --> 00:37:53.000 boundaries out here, the dating pool shrinks. You're not wrong, for one, 479 00:37:53.079 --> 00:37:55.960 and what you won't. You just gotta understand that your resources get, 480 00:37:57.000 --> 00:38:00.239 you know, very limited when you start being like, all right, six 481 00:38:00.280 --> 00:38:02.039 feet tall. Not everybody in the world is six feet talk. You gotta 482 00:38:02.079 --> 00:38:05.639 make this kind of money. Not everybody got that kind of bad. So, 483 00:38:05.800 --> 00:38:08.159 like, you know, like you went from eighty people to twenty people, 484 00:38:08.480 --> 00:38:12.239 twenty people to ten. Now you only'all five and you don't even like 485 00:38:12.280 --> 00:38:15.159 these vibes. Yeah, I mean, that's that's fair. That's okay. 486 00:38:15.239 --> 00:38:21.960 I just got too perspective, sir. You know what I'm saying. I'm 487 00:38:22.119 --> 00:38:27.000 very stern on what I want. Yeah, you know that's and that's cool. 488 00:38:27.159 --> 00:38:30.239 That's probably because if you're supposed to you figure. I've been dating since 489 00:38:30.280 --> 00:38:34.519 I was fifty sixteen years old. It's like that's gonna come with time. 490 00:38:34.559 --> 00:38:36.800 I'm like, yeah, I'm not gonna deal with this again. I don't 491 00:38:36.840 --> 00:38:39.559 want to do this. It's all experience. Every every encounter to me is 492 00:38:39.599 --> 00:38:43.719 just an experience, and you got to learn from each experience. So these 493 00:38:43.719 --> 00:38:46.639 experiences have gotten me here. I have no desire to do these things. 494 00:38:46.639 --> 00:38:51.800 However, I'm gonna never say never type of person. So if it's a 495 00:38:51.800 --> 00:38:55.800 man that comes in into my life, my biggest thing is safety. I've 496 00:38:55.840 --> 00:39:07.599 never felt safe. I don't even I was just gonna say, I think 497 00:39:07.679 --> 00:39:10.880 for you, it's going to take a man to really convince you and show 498 00:39:10.920 --> 00:39:16.239 you what he can be for you to want those things. Go ahead safe. 499 00:39:16.400 --> 00:39:20.280 No, Yeah, one of my biggest things is safety because and it's 500 00:39:20.480 --> 00:39:22.159 worked out with my therapist that I didn't even realize. She's like, so 501 00:39:22.800 --> 00:39:27.960 I got I keep you say you have not felt safe since you were three 502 00:39:28.000 --> 00:39:31.639 years old. Oh and then no encounter with any man in my life have 503 00:39:31.760 --> 00:39:35.199 I ever felt safe? You know? It's crazy about that, So like 504 00:39:35.960 --> 00:39:42.599 I might in this psychology, right, So these are things Jesus, keep 505 00:39:42.599 --> 00:39:46.559 it in your pains. But these are the things I pick up in conversation. 506 00:39:47.000 --> 00:39:52.960 But when you put that mirror up to a woman and it's it's great 507 00:39:52.000 --> 00:39:54.320 because you're taking from your therapist, But if you took it from the nigga 508 00:39:54.360 --> 00:39:59.199 sitting on the couch with you. It's a problem. Right, What I'm 509 00:39:59.199 --> 00:40:02.840 saying you being sent on the cops together. But I'm just saying like a 510 00:40:02.880 --> 00:40:07.159 lot of women can take that advice or that guidance from an outside source. 511 00:40:07.440 --> 00:40:13.480 If it comes from inside the relationship, though, it's that woman is not 512 00:40:13.760 --> 00:40:16.840 ready for a relationship if she can't take that type of advice because you know 513 00:40:16.920 --> 00:40:20.880 why, she just saw a video or you can't tell me what I can 514 00:40:21.000 --> 00:40:25.199 and came where there's this there's a lot of influence out there called influencers, 515 00:40:25.239 --> 00:40:30.639 right, So like there's a lot of just static and it's hard to see 516 00:40:30.679 --> 00:40:35.000 through, particularly when somebody is standing next to you. You you can't, 517 00:40:35.079 --> 00:40:37.440 they can't. You can't see. What they can see is weird. Like 518 00:40:37.840 --> 00:40:39.199 it comes from outside and you can accept it, but if it comes from 519 00:40:39.199 --> 00:40:43.639 inside, you can't. Are you attracted to a woman that wouldn't see you 520 00:40:43.679 --> 00:40:46.800 as a leader in her, in in the relationship or physically, yes, 521 00:40:46.840 --> 00:40:52.480 everything else, Because there's women that think are pretty. I'd be like, 522 00:40:52.599 --> 00:40:54.840 I like her, and then you get to talking to I'd be like, 523 00:40:55.199 --> 00:40:59.159 she doesn't see you as a leader. That I means she doesn't trust you. 524 00:40:59.199 --> 00:41:02.079 So that's not that's not a relationship. Okay, I'm gonna earn her 525 00:41:02.079 --> 00:41:06.920 trust you be like, okay, I'm trying to try. Yeah, yeah, 526 00:41:07.960 --> 00:41:12.360 because she hasn't done her work and her three year oaming like I can't 527 00:41:12.400 --> 00:41:15.119 trust you, I can't treat you because I've never been able to do that. 528 00:41:15.159 --> 00:41:19.199 And so safety and security stability, like those are main things. So 529 00:41:19.519 --> 00:41:22.400 if somebody comes in. I actually had an experience with a man who said 530 00:41:22.440 --> 00:41:27.000 he's like, I don't think I'm gonna be able to convince you. And 531 00:41:27.039 --> 00:41:29.360 I'm like, oh, okay, did he say it was too much? 532 00:41:29.840 --> 00:41:31.880 He didn't. I've heard that much. I've heard that too, but no, 533 00:41:32.000 --> 00:41:34.920 he didn't say that. But he's like, I'm not here. He's 534 00:41:34.920 --> 00:41:36.559 like, I'm not here to force you. I don't think I'm being able 535 00:41:36.559 --> 00:41:37.519 to convince you. But what I was trying to explain to him, I'm 536 00:41:37.559 --> 00:41:43.920 like, naturally, organically, if things just keep flowing the way, it'll 537 00:41:43.920 --> 00:41:47.119 flow that way. Like once I see that I can trust you and I 538 00:41:47.119 --> 00:41:50.400 can feel safe with you, and I could be myself and I could be 539 00:41:50.480 --> 00:41:54.440 vulnerable, let the guard down. Baby, it's gonna just naturally organically happen. 540 00:41:54.559 --> 00:41:59.559 But people don't like you gotta eliminate themselves. They do. Oh, 541 00:42:00.000 --> 00:42:02.960 I was talking to you with this big ass D sign above your head that 542 00:42:04.039 --> 00:42:07.840 says not saying, not saying. I can see it every time you look 543 00:42:07.880 --> 00:42:09.599 me in my eyes. It just ain't not saying, not saying. No 544 00:42:09.639 --> 00:42:14.719 matter how much I'm showing you that I got you, You're not going nowhere. 545 00:42:14.719 --> 00:42:16.559 I got a grip on this. It just keeps saying, not saying, 546 00:42:16.920 --> 00:42:21.039 not saying. So I'm saying, but that's that's the thing that's got 547 00:42:21.039 --> 00:42:23.800 to be worked out between those two people. I feel I feel like a 548 00:42:23.840 --> 00:42:27.239 lot of people really forget that. It's the only two people in the relationship 549 00:42:27.320 --> 00:42:30.239 is those two people in the relationship, and they have so many again, 550 00:42:30.280 --> 00:42:32.719 they have so many outside forces. Their friend group, their family group, 551 00:42:32.960 --> 00:42:38.920 their social media groups that are all these pieces of input that are skewing their 552 00:42:40.039 --> 00:42:45.639 their outlook on what's going on. I got a friend who's married to his 553 00:42:45.679 --> 00:42:47.199 wife, right, I don't know his wife like that, but I said, 554 00:42:47.280 --> 00:42:51.440 bro, you have to you have to show her security, and you've 555 00:42:51.440 --> 00:42:54.679 got to do it all the goddamn time. So I told him, when 556 00:42:54.679 --> 00:43:00.039 you pay a bill, send her the receipt for a notification because as she's 557 00:43:00.079 --> 00:43:04.079 never felt safe for secure, like because she had to move a lot when 558 00:43:04.079 --> 00:43:05.719 she was a kid. I was like, you told me this, you 559 00:43:05.719 --> 00:43:08.760 don't even really he's not connected and that's cool. Lot a lot of people 560 00:43:08.800 --> 00:43:12.880 can't connect that. This is that's all I do. So like they be 561 00:43:12.920 --> 00:43:14.880 talking, and she she said, like, you know, we used to 562 00:43:14.920 --> 00:43:16.360 move on when I was a kid and all this. I said, so 563 00:43:16.480 --> 00:43:22.719 every every time where you pay the rent, just say a little okay. 564 00:43:22.760 --> 00:43:25.920 So she could say, okay, we're cool for but and eventually hopefully you 565 00:43:25.960 --> 00:43:29.559 don't have to keep doing that. But if you do, just keeping it 566 00:43:29.920 --> 00:43:32.800 it's a minor inconvenience for a major advantage in the relationship. A lot of 567 00:43:32.840 --> 00:43:37.039 people ain't really willing to even make that. A lot of women need reassurance. 568 00:43:37.440 --> 00:43:40.199 A lot of people keep I told her. I told her, I 569 00:43:40.280 --> 00:43:43.920 told her, you got to tell him you love him a lot. You 570 00:43:43.920 --> 00:43:45.360 gotta say it all the time. You can't just you know, I love 571 00:43:45.440 --> 00:43:50.559 him, you know what I'm saying, Like you have to you have to 572 00:43:50.559 --> 00:43:54.119 find out what's joe partner security blanket and provide that to that And a lot 573 00:43:54.119 --> 00:43:58.760 of people miss that because they say they should he should already know already, 574 00:43:58.960 --> 00:44:00.360 or she should know how I feel, or he should have felt it, 575 00:44:00.480 --> 00:44:04.079 or he knew that I. It starts to move into that, and a 576 00:44:04.159 --> 00:44:06.920 lot of people I see people argue all the time, and I'd be like, 577 00:44:06.920 --> 00:44:09.679 man, y'all arguing each other, y'all not even trying to resolve the 578 00:44:09.719 --> 00:44:14.039 issue. Yeah, a lot of people don't realize that it's not me versus 579 00:44:14.079 --> 00:44:17.199 you, it's us versus the problem because everybody got the mentality that I'm the 580 00:44:17.239 --> 00:44:22.159 prize, right, everybody got a lot of people have the bars going on. 581 00:44:22.360 --> 00:44:23.519 It's a bar fest. Like I had to think to tell me, 582 00:44:23.559 --> 00:44:24.960 like, bro, you really the prized? I said, No, I'm 583 00:44:24.960 --> 00:44:32.960 not. The union is the prize that has been needed to be said, 584 00:44:34.360 --> 00:44:37.519 because I am so sick and tired of I'm the prize. I'm the catch. 585 00:44:37.559 --> 00:44:44.079 No, this fucking successful union is that's how you get the fifty year 586 00:44:44.119 --> 00:44:46.039 marriage. And I get old the motherfucking die and I'd be like, oh 587 00:44:46.239 --> 00:44:53.119 what my wife said? Not fuck that bitch, Like it's just it's crazy 588 00:44:53.119 --> 00:44:55.519 to me. And I'd be like, and to me, it's so clear, 589 00:44:57.039 --> 00:45:01.519 like I feel like it's self evident. People don't they don't see that 590 00:45:01.719 --> 00:45:06.239 she walking around like I'm the ship. I'm fine. I get my own 591 00:45:06.280 --> 00:45:09.880 money. I got my own ship going on. My kids is well dressed 592 00:45:09.920 --> 00:45:14.480 and taken care of. I'm the prize and the dude walk around, Yeah, 593 00:45:14.519 --> 00:45:16.880 I got it, bag my nigg I gotta fly the motherfuckers. My 594 00:45:16.960 --> 00:45:20.719 niggas love me. I'm the prize. And it's like, no, neither 595 00:45:20.760 --> 00:45:22.159 one of y'all are. You need to get the fuck out of each other's 596 00:45:22.199 --> 00:45:25.039 way, because y'all you in your own way and then he get it your 597 00:45:25.039 --> 00:45:29.400 way and she get in his way, and y'all gotta get out of the 598 00:45:29.400 --> 00:45:35.480 way and really realize that being together is a prize, that relationship, that 599 00:45:35.639 --> 00:45:38.920 union is the prize. That it's not you the individual, it's y'all as 600 00:45:38.920 --> 00:45:47.119 the human. Yeah. I agree. Yeah, damn, I can't tell 601 00:45:47.119 --> 00:45:51.320 you this check on the prize. That's right said because it sounds good. 602 00:45:51.360 --> 00:45:58.880 I said, That's what I'm saying, just so good. It sounds good 603 00:46:00.760 --> 00:46:06.400 what I'm the pro just you should feel that way. I feel like the 604 00:46:06.480 --> 00:46:10.519 eyes on the prize. A brother, don't don't discount my confidence, sir. 605 00:46:13.280 --> 00:46:15.880 But I was saying too earlier, like a lot of people need reassurance, 606 00:46:15.920 --> 00:46:17.079 and I actually hadn't counted this one guy. He said, he was 607 00:46:17.119 --> 00:46:21.079 like, it's not my He's like, I'm never going to sit here and 608 00:46:21.119 --> 00:46:24.840 give keep giving women reassurance. I was like, what, he's tired. 609 00:46:29.480 --> 00:46:32.480 All of a giant they get thrown at them. That don't mean that they 610 00:46:32.760 --> 00:46:37.960 fulfilled. Like you can smash and dadds when you go home. Trust me, 611 00:46:38.719 --> 00:46:45.440 you still be at home feeling lonely, hold your blanket like yeah, 612 00:46:45.159 --> 00:46:51.920 I'm telling you from personal experience, how much you get. Really, it's 613 00:46:51.960 --> 00:46:54.239 just you go home at the end of the night or whatever and be like 614 00:47:00.079 --> 00:47:01.960 getting done and you're going in the bathroom. You look at yourself in the 615 00:47:01.960 --> 00:47:07.440 mirror like I could, right, I could. I could have played the 616 00:47:07.440 --> 00:47:14.119 game. But there's so many other things like in the moment though, there's 617 00:47:14.159 --> 00:47:19.079 nothing you want more rights, nothing like when when the vibe is vibing and 618 00:47:19.119 --> 00:47:22.280 she's like you're about to get this, I won't that ship. Don't get 619 00:47:22.280 --> 00:47:25.079 me wrong, it's not like I'm here. We go again to have sex, 620 00:47:25.199 --> 00:47:28.679 but it's not like that I want this is what I was here for 621 00:47:29.760 --> 00:47:34.119 when I showed up for tonight. But afterwards you know you thing she or 622 00:47:34.280 --> 00:47:37.320 you know that you go home. I'll be in the car sometimes like damn 623 00:47:38.519 --> 00:47:43.440 could have watched like I just be like this this is it don't feel great 624 00:47:43.440 --> 00:47:45.920 because you know, like you know, you have no intention, don't do 625 00:47:45.000 --> 00:47:51.079 what like you know link situation and it gets olf. I'm like, yeah, 626 00:47:51.119 --> 00:47:53.000 yeah, get tired quickly. I don't don't. I don't want to 627 00:47:53.000 --> 00:47:55.440 do this. People think, oh, that means the sex one good. 628 00:47:55.519 --> 00:48:02.039 That's not the I'm empty inside. I'm right because no matter how much Gucci 629 00:48:02.079 --> 00:48:07.239 you but you can't feel that, you can't feel that whole. That's why 630 00:48:07.280 --> 00:48:10.400 you keep going. I can't this person for they don't they don't care about 631 00:48:10.400 --> 00:48:14.760 me as a person. Like it's just purely I'm like, I'm at work 632 00:48:14.920 --> 00:48:21.920 starting you can't bring me food lunch when you get like, no, I'm 633 00:48:21.920 --> 00:48:27.480 not doing that, but you have a question. So I'm a very like 634 00:48:27.639 --> 00:48:32.239 rigid person. I'm very you know, kind of narrow vision. I'm not 635 00:48:32.639 --> 00:48:36.800 always on a social scene and things like that. I go to work, 636 00:48:36.880 --> 00:48:39.440 I take care of my son. You know what I'm saying. I could 637 00:48:39.440 --> 00:48:43.840 clean all that all that stuff. So I'm not around, I'm not in 638 00:48:43.960 --> 00:48:47.440 these like places to like meet different men. So my therapist recommended to me 639 00:48:47.639 --> 00:48:55.159 to do so. I created a dating I know, right, I created 640 00:48:55.159 --> 00:49:00.320 a dating profile. I'm on day four and I'm ready to be active in 641 00:49:04.000 --> 00:49:10.639 They got it, I don't know. They tell people you do it, 642 00:49:10.719 --> 00:49:20.519 say now get her. My cousin been on and off the story. My 643 00:49:20.639 --> 00:49:23.880 data website is Facebook. I ain't gonna lie to you. So my question 644 00:49:25.079 --> 00:49:29.199 but that that's the best man. I want to know everything, and you're 645 00:49:29.199 --> 00:49:32.760 gonna give me to your life your Facebook profile exactly. So that's the best 646 00:49:32.760 --> 00:49:37.039 way to go to your Facebook profile absolutely and see how you talk all that 647 00:49:37.079 --> 00:49:43.199 good stuff. If I want to continue with you, you gotta stop pretending 648 00:49:43.239 --> 00:49:46.880 that for me. Yeah, I just I don't know. I don't know. 649 00:49:47.400 --> 00:49:52.800 Question to well both of y'all. But for you first, it sounds 650 00:49:52.840 --> 00:49:55.239 like you run into a lot of women who don't listen and you entertain it 651 00:49:55.280 --> 00:50:00.840 because of maybe physical attributes. I'm just are you just say you're running? 652 00:50:00.880 --> 00:50:05.920 Are you running into good women? Are you meeting I've definitely up some good 653 00:50:06.000 --> 00:50:09.079 women or man. Because you're a woman with a good court. Girl, 654 00:50:09.639 --> 00:50:14.960 you're a woman with a good cord, and you're a man, So where 655 00:50:15.000 --> 00:50:22.159 are the Where can the people with the good course like take you? She's 656 00:50:22.159 --> 00:50:23.760 saying all the right thing, but no, both of them. All I'm 657 00:50:23.800 --> 00:50:27.840 hearing is both of y'all got good hairs on y'all shoulders, y'all got good 658 00:50:27.920 --> 00:50:31.800 course, but y'all meet the opposite. This is a tractor. I don't 659 00:50:31.840 --> 00:50:36.079 know for what for my experience, Like I be honest, like half the 660 00:50:36.119 --> 00:50:38.480 time when I end up dating a woman, it's not even intentional. Like 661 00:50:38.559 --> 00:50:40.960 most of the time, I just be like, I want to eat, 662 00:50:40.960 --> 00:50:43.800 but eat the loan. So you want to go with me? Yeah, 663 00:50:43.840 --> 00:50:45.599 okay? And I want to go to the movies. You're trying to go 664 00:50:45.599 --> 00:50:50.239 see a movie? We go together like that. That's That's just how I 665 00:50:50.239 --> 00:50:52.360 am. Like, I don't I would rather do something with someone else than 666 00:50:52.440 --> 00:50:55.719 do it. I feel like I have run into some decent guys, but 667 00:50:55.760 --> 00:51:01.639 they don't be ready. I've definitely I don't want to date you, Okay, 668 00:51:02.800 --> 00:51:08.119 I'm definitely. I'm definitely just because I wasn't always good, you know 669 00:51:08.159 --> 00:51:12.679 what I'm saying. So like there's and I have moment sometimes sometimes sometimes I'll 670 00:51:12.719 --> 00:51:16.960 be like I'm a well rounded scumback I do tend to attract narcissistant, well 671 00:51:17.039 --> 00:51:27.000 round scumback sometimes a trophy. Yeah I got her, And me and my 672 00:51:27.000 --> 00:51:30.239 friends just have this conversation that those men that try to humble you. So 673 00:51:30.440 --> 00:51:36.039 the things that was attractive, Oh she she pretty? Then it was like, 674 00:51:36.079 --> 00:51:37.119 you be doing too much? Why you be posting that? Why are 675 00:51:37.119 --> 00:51:40.559 you posting meself? Like whoa bro? What? Like that's the same stuff 676 00:51:40.599 --> 00:51:46.880 I was doing prior. And then because you're his now, I tend to 677 00:51:46.960 --> 00:51:51.880 attract. And then they also say sometimes you tend to date or track men 678 00:51:52.039 --> 00:51:55.960 like your father, And I'm like, oh I have there's one in particular. 679 00:51:57.000 --> 00:52:01.360 I'm like, this is my dad reincarnated. Holy but I like mamauld 680 00:52:01.360 --> 00:52:08.960 have been marry her. If I met a woman like I could absolutely, 681 00:52:09.360 --> 00:52:15.079 But I feel like it was it was a lesson in that MoMA like wholesome 682 00:52:15.079 --> 00:52:19.719 and ship. I'm just saying, like, are you Mama's boy? I 683 00:52:19.719 --> 00:52:22.719 love my mama. I'm not mam woman with the same value the values that 684 00:52:23.719 --> 00:52:28.280 my oldest son. Actually, I was like because when he said, like 685 00:52:28.320 --> 00:52:30.239 the type of girls that he like, like you like girls like your mama, 686 00:52:30.320 --> 00:52:32.719 But he was like, I want a girl I mean, he's getting 687 00:52:32.719 --> 00:52:37.559 into the dat and stuff which is wild grown. He's grown now, and 688 00:52:37.599 --> 00:52:42.440 he's like I was, he don't my son, He don't do too much 689 00:52:42.440 --> 00:52:45.679 of a kicking in and all that. He by his business. He drives 690 00:52:45.719 --> 00:52:47.960 dump truck. He like he about his business and he like, I don't 691 00:52:47.960 --> 00:52:51.639 want the girl that's our He was like the girls that's for the streets. 692 00:52:51.639 --> 00:52:52.800 Mind He's like, I want to girl that's on her stuff. Like I 693 00:52:52.840 --> 00:52:57.119 am, you want a girl like that? But then I'm glad that's what 694 00:52:57.360 --> 00:53:00.880 he saw and what I couldn't. Still looking for a home, but also 695 00:53:00.920 --> 00:53:04.719 so me and my oldest son was having a similar conversation and I told him, 696 00:53:04.719 --> 00:53:07.599 I said, I'm trying so hard and him I might be a little 697 00:53:07.639 --> 00:53:08.880 because he's already in his twenties, but at least with my little boys, 698 00:53:08.880 --> 00:53:12.519 I'm like, I'm trying so hard to raise young men that women are not 699 00:53:12.519 --> 00:53:16.159 gonna need healing from. Like that's one of my main goals. So I 700 00:53:16.199 --> 00:53:20.920 try to like be open up with emotions. And I never was the type 701 00:53:20.920 --> 00:53:22.880 of mom like boys don't cry. No, you could cry about it, 702 00:53:22.880 --> 00:53:24.480 We're not gonna sit here and keep crying about it. But It's okay to 703 00:53:24.519 --> 00:53:30.079 feel your feelings. Get that out, let's talk about it. My kids, 704 00:53:30.079 --> 00:53:32.280 we just recently had some just major stuff happening in our lives, and 705 00:53:32.280 --> 00:53:37.199 I've been very intentional about checking in with my boys about how they're feeling about 706 00:53:37.239 --> 00:53:42.000 things so that when they do start to get into, you know, dating 707 00:53:42.039 --> 00:53:45.320 and stuff, that they're just aware. That's my biggest concern With my oldest 708 00:53:45.320 --> 00:53:49.039 son. I'm like, I wasn't even I didn't have a capacity as he 709 00:53:49.239 --> 00:53:51.320 we kind of grew up together, right, So I'm like, dang, 710 00:53:51.400 --> 00:53:53.079 like, so now I'm trying to talk through this stuff with him, Like, 711 00:53:53.119 --> 00:53:57.440 I just don't want you to like shut down or not be able to 712 00:53:57.480 --> 00:54:00.519 express yourself. For that's important because a lot of our marmos, especially in 713 00:54:00.639 --> 00:54:07.800 our age, a lot of dopeians holes like literal like prostitution ship. So 714 00:54:07.840 --> 00:54:12.320 there's mama one home and daddy went home at a lot of and even that's 715 00:54:12.480 --> 00:54:17.360 the strength. A lot of our parents worked. So their love, they 716 00:54:17.599 --> 00:54:24.239 their way of showing they loved us materialistic stuff in the n yeah, like 717 00:54:24.599 --> 00:54:29.519 these other responsibilities. This is how I show you love you, And they 718 00:54:29.599 --> 00:54:32.079 never verbally expressed it. So a lot of men did not know what love 719 00:54:32.199 --> 00:54:37.119 looked like even from home. Oh, and don't look like your daddy, 720 00:54:37.599 --> 00:54:40.280 okay, because if your daddy wasn't ship and you look like your daddy, 721 00:54:42.000 --> 00:54:45.639 reminder, And a lot of times you got that, you kind of got 722 00:54:45.719 --> 00:54:52.079 unnecessary backlash at time like here here your mind is struggling trying to keep the 723 00:54:52.159 --> 00:54:54.119 lights on, and you come walk in the house asking like, hey, 724 00:54:54.119 --> 00:54:59.360 can I get a PB and Jay, And she's fast on you because her 725 00:54:59.400 --> 00:55:02.559 actual aim is the fact that your dad decided to go be a fuck nigga 726 00:55:02.679 --> 00:55:06.719 and you just look like him. So a lot of times we didn't have 727 00:55:06.760 --> 00:55:09.840 that opportunity to have that connection with our moms. To really figure out what 728 00:55:10.320 --> 00:55:15.519 love looked like, we had to take it from our grandma. And Grandma 729 00:55:15.679 --> 00:55:19.039 was spread thing as is because by that point in time she was sick of 730 00:55:19.079 --> 00:55:24.480 Granddad' shit, so she's not showing. Then it kind of goes back to 731 00:55:24.519 --> 00:55:28.199 my point earlier when I said about me really not wanting to get married, 732 00:55:28.239 --> 00:55:30.119 because that's what so many of us have seen. I'm like, what about 733 00:55:30.159 --> 00:55:34.679 this? I want to do this, but I what I tend to find 734 00:55:34.719 --> 00:55:37.760 out, But what you tend to find out later on down in life, 735 00:55:37.039 --> 00:55:38.920 and for some a lot of people, they've already made up their mind, 736 00:55:38.960 --> 00:55:45.199 so they don't understand that real happy married people ain't got time to show you 737 00:55:45.239 --> 00:55:51.360 that they really married and happy. So a lot of representations of marriages are 738 00:55:51.480 --> 00:55:55.000 usually either the back end of all the bad shit because social media is notorious, 739 00:55:55.000 --> 00:55:59.880 were just putting negativity out there, Like two days ago, y'all we 740 00:56:00.119 --> 00:56:04.559 happy, loving each other, pillow fighting, having laser tag. But then 741 00:56:04.599 --> 00:56:07.960 today he's forgot to take the trash out and that's what you put on the 742 00:56:07.960 --> 00:56:10.519 internet about him, even though he did everything you needed him to do, 743 00:56:10.559 --> 00:56:15.000 But that one moment is what you decided to tell the world about. So 744 00:56:15.119 --> 00:56:19.280 now those people who looked up to you as that's a relationship that I've seen 745 00:56:19.400 --> 00:56:22.639 grow, Oh yeah, that's why I can't get married all because they only 746 00:56:22.800 --> 00:56:27.920 shows you the negative side of it. Then you get a lot of people 747 00:56:27.960 --> 00:56:31.559 who get divorced and they'll show the victim side of it, but nobody sits 748 00:56:31.599 --> 00:56:35.880 back and take accountability. You what did you also do to get here? 749 00:56:36.159 --> 00:56:38.960 Because yes he cheated on you, and yes some men will do what men 750 00:56:39.039 --> 00:56:44.320 don't do, but some men do what they do because you not doing what 751 00:56:44.360 --> 00:56:46.880 you're doing. So where does your accountability come at in regards to it? 752 00:56:47.000 --> 00:56:49.920 Yes, So I want to go back to what you're saying about the mom 753 00:56:49.920 --> 00:56:52.119 stuff. So another thing is I feel like a lot of moms toddle their 754 00:56:52.119 --> 00:57:01.639 sons, so then we run can and I don't. I try not to 755 00:57:01.719 --> 00:57:06.599 do that. And then also I feel like we run into like men that 756 00:57:06.760 --> 00:57:10.119 can't receive affection because it goes back to their mom, like if they never 757 00:57:10.679 --> 00:57:14.079 seen it or felt it, and a lot of it. I think, 758 00:57:14.079 --> 00:57:15.440 well, I can say for women who might be mad at their dads before 759 00:57:15.480 --> 00:57:19.079 my experience with men like I'm like, bro, you mad at your mom? 760 00:57:19.159 --> 00:57:22.920 I didn't do it. And that's why I do ask about their relationship. 761 00:57:22.960 --> 00:57:24.480 I'll ask you when I said them first day questions, first couple, 762 00:57:25.000 --> 00:57:28.320 I want to know your childhood, what's your relationship with your mom? Like, 763 00:57:29.039 --> 00:57:30.719 I want to see how you handle your mom and the and someone like 764 00:57:30.760 --> 00:57:35.800 man, my mom she is. I'm like, so then because if you're 765 00:57:35.800 --> 00:57:37.400 really mad at her, and then you're gonna and I trigger you in some 766 00:57:37.480 --> 00:57:43.159 way. Yeah. With women, Yeah, and I why some women are 767 00:57:43.239 --> 00:57:54.599 super materialistic because you gotta spoil me, and so much stuff relates back to 768 00:57:54.880 --> 00:58:00.000 our childhood. And but that's where again, where come we're doing that work 769 00:58:00.199 --> 00:58:02.760 comes in because it's like you won't even recognize those things about yourself have if 770 00:58:02.800 --> 00:58:06.440 you're not trying to do some of the work. So I figured out I'm 771 00:58:06.440 --> 00:58:09.800 like because I did end up my kids father is a lot like my dad 772 00:58:09.880 --> 00:58:14.199 in the streets, came out the streets. My dad was a pure gangster 773 00:58:14.400 --> 00:58:17.639 like, so I end up kind of gravitating towards man like my father. 774 00:58:17.920 --> 00:58:22.840 And then I was like, hold on waiting, a little narcissistic running around, 775 00:58:22.920 --> 00:58:27.760 got playing fifty eleven kids, all the kind of goofy yeah, because 776 00:58:27.760 --> 00:58:30.880 you sometimes you don't. You go after what you are familiar with. Lot 777 00:58:32.880 --> 00:58:37.000 to you got eleven or you got fifty. But I'm the oldest of twelve. 778 00:58:37.119 --> 00:58:44.239 But it might be believe pretty much less. It's more than eleven, 779 00:58:44.280 --> 00:58:49.119 but it's less of fifty. It's a lot that's a good man out here. 780 00:58:49.119 --> 00:58:52.039 So I pray that one of those good men good women out here. 781 00:58:52.039 --> 00:58:55.480 So I paid that one of those. I'm thirty seven, I got no 782 00:58:55.599 --> 00:58:59.960 kids. That's why I thought that kids, because I refuse to be he 783 00:59:00.320 --> 00:59:04.960 the unicorns. I refused to remember when Barack Obama was running for president. 784 00:59:05.960 --> 00:59:12.440 Yeah, no tattoos and no baby mama is just yeah, how do you 785 00:59:15.880 --> 00:59:20.519 define I definitely nobody mama, but yeah, I don't want to be young. 786 00:59:20.679 --> 00:59:22.280 But I didn't go into it as the baby mama. I didn't you 787 00:59:22.280 --> 00:59:27.079 see that? And I think that's the difference. There's those situations where like 788 00:59:27.559 --> 00:59:30.519 him, you lay down with him, but you know in the back, 789 00:59:31.159 --> 00:59:34.920 this is not gonna be. That's gonna be long term. And then you 790 00:59:35.079 --> 00:59:37.280 pregnant. I was. I mean I was sixteen, seventeen, you know, 791 00:59:38.480 --> 00:59:42.119 I wasn't thinking about that. But you still you stayed with him. 792 00:59:42.239 --> 00:59:45.559 You know I had more, so you wasn't a baby mama. There was 793 00:59:45.960 --> 00:59:49.480 hope. What it was for me, I was twelve and I decided I'm 794 00:59:49.480 --> 00:59:52.519 not gonna be a baby. I was twelve, and I remember, I 795 00:59:52.559 --> 00:59:55.880 remember the exact direction I say it. When it was between a family member 796 00:59:57.559 --> 01:00:02.639 and his baby mama. That's it doing this, I remember. And then 797 01:00:02.920 --> 01:00:07.639 when I turned old enough to start fucking, I was like, yeah, 798 01:00:07.639 --> 01:00:10.199 I'm not going I'm not getting trapped like this. It's not gonna beat me. 799 01:00:10.440 --> 01:00:14.480 And also then when I got older, I was like, I refuse 800 01:00:14.519 --> 01:00:16.079 to another man raised my child, my children, my child or whatever, 801 01:00:16.159 --> 01:00:21.239 because the nigga's dumb and you cannot. I can't. I can't be trying 802 01:00:21.280 --> 01:00:27.519 to unprogram my child from what this thing was talking about, because like, 803 01:00:27.840 --> 01:00:30.760 I'll be frustrated sometimes, be like I got friends who got kids. I'll 804 01:00:30.800 --> 01:00:37.320 be like, your father is terrible. At least you trying. Were all 805 01:00:37.440 --> 01:00:40.360 like learning as we're going. And what's crazy is a lot of us are 806 01:00:40.400 --> 01:00:46.119 reparenting ourselves or we're reparenting our parents because as we are on a journey and 807 01:00:46.199 --> 01:00:50.400 kind of stopping these generational curses and trauma. Now, I'll be trying to 808 01:00:50.400 --> 01:00:54.280 bring them along to like, hey, this is not what doing. Ain't 809 01:00:54.280 --> 01:00:59.360 nobody gonna ever get it right now? No nobody. You just gotta get 810 01:00:59.360 --> 01:01:00.800 it the best you can because they know ain't no right way to pay it. 811 01:01:01.760 --> 01:01:07.480 You know what I'm saying, Like, is your child? Yeah, 812 01:01:07.360 --> 01:01:12.119 them sales are different. My two kids are polar opposite, so the way 813 01:01:12.159 --> 01:01:16.800 I parent one most the other one, So they different, and all you 814 01:01:16.800 --> 01:01:20.840 can do is hope that you did. I got two girls, so all 815 01:01:20.880 --> 01:01:23.119 I can do is hope that they don't fall in love with a natty headed 816 01:01:23.119 --> 01:01:27.719 ass nigga. Yeah, okay, that's crazy. Me and my oldest and 817 01:01:27.800 --> 01:01:30.519 already have we. I mean, we talk a lot so and I'm glad 818 01:01:30.559 --> 01:01:32.920 that me and my two big boys like we able to have a type of 819 01:01:32.920 --> 01:01:36.360 conversation that they come for to come talk to me because I say this, 820 01:01:36.519 --> 01:01:37.679 like already talking to my oldest son, I was like, listen, you 821 01:01:37.719 --> 01:01:43.360 come around here and talk about baby. I'm not the grandma you. That's 822 01:01:43.360 --> 01:01:45.280 not what you're gonna want to do. I'm not doing it because I just 823 01:01:45.280 --> 01:01:47.920 got this saying I've been taking care of people my whole life. I'm ready 824 01:01:47.920 --> 01:01:52.239 to do me Like, I'm not about take that kid up to her grandma 825 01:01:52.440 --> 01:01:55.440 her mama house. But that's unique to too, because y'all, like I've 826 01:01:55.480 --> 01:02:00.079 talked to a lot of women about like losing their identity they become a mama, 827 01:02:00.239 --> 01:02:02.880 but losing the identity once they become a wife. That is very unique 828 01:02:02.880 --> 01:02:07.480 to women. Men do not go through that ship. Yeah, that's just 829 01:02:07.760 --> 01:02:10.880 the one thing I'm as I'm getting older than from man that that are be 830 01:02:10.960 --> 01:02:15.960 selfish. And I just said that man and not in not saying in a 831 01:02:15.960 --> 01:02:17.920 bad way. But y'all gonna always think about y'all like we don't do that. 832 01:02:19.000 --> 01:02:22.880 We think about everybody else before that. Most men, you're gonna think 833 01:02:22.880 --> 01:02:27.320 about yourself first. You know why though, Right, there's there's there's a 834 01:02:27.400 --> 01:02:30.840 history behind that too. Because if I fall all fall right, I can 835 01:02:30.920 --> 01:02:35.159 see that. But if mama fall, y'all ship fall apart too. Don't 836 01:02:35.159 --> 01:02:37.000 get me wrong, but it's it's just a different type of like if it's 837 01:02:37.000 --> 01:02:42.000 a nigga kicking the door. I got to be defense number one, period, 838 01:02:42.440 --> 01:02:45.280 No questions, ask no nothing, none of that ship. So that's 839 01:02:45.280 --> 01:02:49.920 why you think of That's why I hear you. But billion years we've been, 840 01:02:50.360 --> 01:02:55.079 we've been the number one. We are we are? You said what 841 01:02:55.320 --> 01:02:58.840 we talking about? Two different things. I hear what you're saying, but 842 01:02:58.960 --> 01:03:01.559 I'm saying just in dream man like he's not going too much or just anything 843 01:03:01.599 --> 01:03:08.800 he got going on leadership. Yeah. Selfish, Yeah, But they go 844 01:03:08.800 --> 01:03:13.880 ahead and end though, because he is selfish because the way his mind is 845 01:03:13.960 --> 01:03:17.519 already programmed and wired and what society expects of him, and like that, 846 01:03:17.760 --> 01:03:23.199 it's they it's an underlying cause. Right, Most men are selfish because they 847 01:03:23.280 --> 01:03:27.400 have to be in the position to win. That's that's what the world's gonna 848 01:03:27.440 --> 01:03:31.960 keep telling you forever and ever and ever. To a certainty, he has 849 01:03:32.000 --> 01:03:37.840 tothing I'm not. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about just in 850 01:03:37.920 --> 01:03:40.880 general. Every day men aren't really thinking about himself. You're thinking about himself. 851 01:03:42.119 --> 01:03:45.679 He's not considering for himself, for the family. But every I'm telling 852 01:03:45.719 --> 01:03:50.320 you what you're saying, he's really a family man. I agree with her. 853 01:03:50.800 --> 01:03:52.880 I'm lost. I ain't even gonna lie to you. Your selfish period 854 01:03:52.920 --> 01:03:58.440 regardless. You ain't got nobody to worry about. Definitely be selfish. You 855 01:03:58.440 --> 01:04:00.320 ain't got nothing to worry about, so you are to be self I was 856 01:04:00.400 --> 01:04:08.719 like, is this kind of like I forgot you? Wow? That's that's 857 01:04:08.760 --> 01:04:21.719 that's the kind of that type of learn from y'all. No, I agree 858 01:04:21.719 --> 01:04:25.840 with you, But I agree with you because I had to tell somebody the 859 01:04:25.880 --> 01:04:30.800 other day that being selfish is not a bad thing. You have to be 860 01:04:30.800 --> 01:04:34.440 because a lot of times, and especially women, y'all get put in the 861 01:04:34.519 --> 01:04:41.159 role that you have to be. You gotta take care like kids gotta be 862 01:04:41.280 --> 01:04:43.679 fed, I gotta have this done. You got to take care of something 863 01:04:43.719 --> 01:04:46.039 that your job because you in some time of some type of support status in 864 01:04:46.119 --> 01:04:49.920 regards to it. Not time to tell. Your family leans on you because 865 01:04:49.960 --> 01:04:55.000 you're the strong one out all the kids. You know what I'm saying. 866 01:04:55.360 --> 01:04:58.199 Your friends might come to you because you the only one with common sense in 867 01:04:58.280 --> 01:05:01.639 regards to group. So you will have so much that comes at you every 868 01:05:01.639 --> 01:05:06.519 single day that when you stop and say this is my time. Fuck y'all, 869 01:05:08.199 --> 01:05:12.039 people got to respect it because you need that in order to be able 870 01:05:12.079 --> 01:05:14.719 to continue to deal with all that over there. Now, see what you're 871 01:05:14.719 --> 01:05:18.280 saying, what I would like it to be, No, but we get 872 01:05:18.320 --> 01:05:24.519 with you like it. That's a whole. That's a whole another episode. 873 01:05:24.639 --> 01:05:27.519 What I would like it to be is more so of a competition to please 874 01:05:27.559 --> 01:05:30.440 each other. And that's that's one of my requirements in a relationship because I 875 01:05:30.480 --> 01:05:34.639 know I'm a giver. I know if there's an issue, I'm going to 876 01:05:34.679 --> 01:05:38.559 solve that problem, you know, whatever it is. So I can't be 877 01:05:38.679 --> 01:05:41.800 with the person to partner with a person that's going to take advantage of that. 878 01:05:42.360 --> 01:05:45.000 I cannot do that. Even if I see that you you know, 879 01:05:45.239 --> 01:05:50.519 are willing to take and not give and see that's that's the same thing I 880 01:05:50.599 --> 01:05:54.840 keep working right because I am a problem solving like you come to me like 881 01:05:55.400 --> 01:05:59.440 I don't know how I'm gonna do this. I'm a bastardize some ship, 882 01:06:00.079 --> 01:06:04.360 fix it and really fix it. I just be like you as that man 883 01:06:04.400 --> 01:06:08.920 should be more so looking for women who are like you and kind of like 884 01:06:09.119 --> 01:06:13.800 why you said at the beginning, he expected that woman to just kind of 885 01:06:14.400 --> 01:06:16.840 buy him the shoes and know that he's going to give her the world without 886 01:06:17.480 --> 01:06:20.519 actually showing her that he's going to give it a world. But at the 887 01:06:20.519 --> 01:06:24.880 same time, you've been in a position knowing what you can give, you 888 01:06:25.079 --> 01:06:28.639 really kind of should be in the shadows looking at what she's going to do. 889 01:06:28.840 --> 01:06:31.199 That's almost you shouldn't test a person, but that's kind of what you 890 01:06:31.199 --> 01:06:34.599 should be looking for. You know, how is she going to operate with 891 01:06:34.639 --> 01:06:39.960 me? And then instead of showing her what you can get, watch what 892 01:06:40.000 --> 01:06:45.760 she does first, and then that's your standard operator, like you know, 893 01:06:45.840 --> 01:06:50.800 like change it because it's like changing yourself. I got a question for you. 894 01:06:51.559 --> 01:06:57.079 How much is I am coming to ask no question today? How much 895 01:06:57.159 --> 01:07:03.280 questions? How much is too much changed? Like a lot of change yourself. 896 01:07:03.519 --> 01:07:09.880 I think changing that can be the start of changing yourself. Like, 897 01:07:10.519 --> 01:07:15.760 not everybody user tactics, not yourself. For a man, especially a man 898 01:07:15.880 --> 01:07:20.119 that is able to provide, Like y'all have to protect yourselves, so you 899 01:07:20.199 --> 01:07:28.519 shouldn't be displaying certain things to a woman. Yeah, I'm not a sucker, 900 01:07:30.079 --> 01:07:32.480 of course, I'm saying, watch how she Just watch how she operates. 901 01:07:32.800 --> 01:07:36.400 Just watch how she operates. First, because that's why y'all wanted to 902 01:07:40.320 --> 01:07:43.519 because a lot of them that's what they bring. And listen, I ain't 903 01:07:43.559 --> 01:07:46.519 saying all, but a lot of like that's all they have. They leave 904 01:07:46.599 --> 01:07:48.880 with that because that's all they have. But now you want to get into 905 01:07:48.920 --> 01:07:57.559 some like really intelligent conversation, it's like, bro, and then it was 906 01:07:57.599 --> 01:08:00.440 just gold. That's all you, that's all you. Because this is America. 907 01:08:00.480 --> 01:08:04.239 There's very few problems you can that you can't solve without throwing money. 908 01:08:04.320 --> 01:08:09.599 But these are two women right here that don't look for necessarily a man. 909 01:08:09.880 --> 01:08:12.480 I'm not talking about that. I'm someking about There's very few problems you can't 910 01:08:12.480 --> 01:08:15.480 solve by throwing money at it. If you are about to get put out 911 01:08:15.480 --> 01:08:18.520 your place, I can go pay the rent money solves that problem. If 912 01:08:18.560 --> 01:08:21.439 you are struggling at work and you want to quit your job, go ahead 913 01:08:21.479 --> 01:08:26.720 and quick because money can solve that problem. That's so there's another skill set 914 01:08:26.760 --> 01:08:28.600 that you need to have. And I feel like a lot of like you 915 01:08:28.640 --> 01:08:30.000 said, a lot of men lead with that because they know that's the easiest 916 01:08:30.000 --> 01:08:33.560 way to solve any problem. Is it the easy way to solve a problem 917 01:08:33.640 --> 01:08:39.840 or the easiest way to get a woman? Because that's track Both finances are 918 01:08:39.840 --> 01:08:47.439 never going to Yeah, question why am I here? Is yo? You're 919 01:08:47.439 --> 01:08:51.560 not paying rent? Yeah? Why you're talking to me? That's the thing. 920 01:08:51.600 --> 01:08:57.399 That's that's the question I asked. I'm yeah, exactly like you get 921 01:08:57.520 --> 01:09:00.439 this situation. I'm out. That's somebody texts me that say, no food 922 01:09:00.520 --> 01:09:04.359 my house. How do you get here to judge? Because I'm not in 923 01:09:04.399 --> 01:09:15.319 the best situation like that just better yesterday if you I ain't gonna neither do 924 01:09:15.479 --> 01:09:24.840 I I'm like, what is that me? I probably do need to get 925 01:09:24.840 --> 01:09:29.680 out more Jesus because niggas looking for hand downs. You don't want that kind 926 01:09:29.720 --> 01:09:31.479 of smoke, but you really are. This niggas is poor. I can 927 01:09:31.560 --> 01:09:39.000 tell my good man the money people, So what you're entertaining that that that 928 01:09:39.039 --> 01:09:44.520 would be my entertain just waiting for your king. You you're waiting for your 929 01:09:44.560 --> 01:09:50.239 bow ass to show up to show what to be married. Okay, I 930 01:09:50.439 --> 01:09:54.720 just only know that because my mama, Minister Bro. That's the only reason 931 01:09:54.760 --> 01:09:59.479 I know that I know the whole story because O patiently wait and I'm okay 932 01:09:59.520 --> 01:10:03.159 with that Bible Bibles over there. No, I can't say that if I'm 933 01:10:03.159 --> 01:10:11.640 walking. No, I'm patiently wait. And that's the thing it's like, 934 01:10:11.840 --> 01:10:15.920 because I am patient and I'm okay with being alone, and I've done enough 935 01:10:15.920 --> 01:10:23.199 work on myself that I'm not going to settle. I'm not just this is 936 01:10:21.439 --> 01:10:28.399 question because I know Michelle is comfortable with being alone. You know, Trina 937 01:10:28.479 --> 01:10:32.319 is comfortable with being alone. One just got comfortable with being alone. Johnny 938 01:10:32.399 --> 01:10:39.000 is probably comfortable with being alone. Since you guys are comfortable in your loan 939 01:10:39.159 --> 01:10:44.039 space, does that make it more difficult for anybody to even approach you today? 940 01:10:44.279 --> 01:10:49.640 Absolutely? What did I say before? If your presence don't feel as 941 01:10:49.640 --> 01:10:54.159 good as my piece, you cannot be here and I can say I'll be 942 01:10:55.079 --> 01:11:00.319 do y'all give people fair opportunities. I feel like I don't up a girl 943 01:11:00.359 --> 01:11:05.359 yesterday for not liking the song, because like when you said, you like, 944 01:11:05.399 --> 01:11:09.600 you said, you don't want them to disrupt your peace. But in 945 01:11:09.760 --> 01:11:13.239 order for you to be able to find your mate, you have to allow 946 01:11:13.319 --> 01:11:17.159 them the opportunity. I think when people are long alone for such a long 947 01:11:17.279 --> 01:11:21.920 time, they find anything to be like, it's not gonna work. So 948 01:11:23.000 --> 01:11:26.479 you don't give people a fair chance. Johnny said she didn't like a song 949 01:11:26.520 --> 01:11:30.439 he liked, and now he kissed it to the curve. Maybe that person. 950 01:11:33.039 --> 01:11:38.479 I'm not that like strict about it. Like, but if it's somebody, 951 01:11:38.560 --> 01:11:41.239 it's just I'm just such a thing. You just have to be a 952 01:11:41.319 --> 01:11:43.800 natural, organic thing. It just has to flow. If it's not. 953 01:11:43.840 --> 01:11:45.560 I'm a you know me, I'm an energy person all day. So it's 954 01:11:45.560 --> 01:11:50.119 like if I'm feeling your energy, we catching a vibe, let's just organically, 955 01:11:50.159 --> 01:11:53.319 let's see where I'm fine, Like, let's see where it goes. 956 01:11:53.359 --> 01:11:55.800 I'm not in a rush. And I think that's where a lot of women 957 01:11:55.840 --> 01:11:59.319 come on this timeline, right because I already have kids, I already own 958 01:11:59.359 --> 01:12:02.119 my house. I don't I'm not honest. Timeline of like my clock, 959 01:12:02.239 --> 01:12:04.960 not ticket I'm not looking for it, like I don't need like to do 960 01:12:05.119 --> 01:12:08.640 like I'm so, I'm really in a space of like, no, I 961 01:12:08.680 --> 01:12:11.680 really jenuinely want to get to know you. I'm not looking to feel. 962 01:12:11.760 --> 01:12:15.640 No imaginary timeline that's important, tho, because you know, like some people 963 01:12:16.119 --> 01:12:17.760 like, look, I'm to be thirty, I gotta get married. I 964 01:12:17.800 --> 01:12:21.199 supposed to be married before I thirty. I'm not putting that already. I 965 01:12:21.239 --> 01:12:24.560 was supposed to have my first kid by now. Yeah, I don't have 966 01:12:24.600 --> 01:12:28.720 this imaginary timeline. I don't have that pressure. I'm very much. We 967 01:12:28.800 --> 01:12:31.600 keep hearing about this soft life. I'm creating that for myself. I'm putting 968 01:12:31.600 --> 01:12:36.920 myself in a position to have that like with or without somebody, period. 969 01:12:38.680 --> 01:12:46.439 And I know I haven't had it in so longs. My sister said, 970 01:12:46.439 --> 01:12:51.359 you Baddy for a song. She said, you Saddy, So what was 971 01:12:51.399 --> 01:12:57.279 the song? You wasn't feeling her? He was. You know, It's 972 01:12:57.359 --> 01:13:00.279 like she asked for a ride. I'm like, all right, for a 973 01:13:00.359 --> 01:13:02.640 right where you mean it? They need a ride. They ain't got no 974 01:13:02.680 --> 01:13:10.720 food in I just talk to people not interesting and I'm not interested. Yeah, 975 01:13:11.119 --> 01:13:15.760 that's what it really is. How many women am bad, but think 976 01:13:15.880 --> 01:13:23.119 because they got a pussy, they gonna win me over. Sh That's crazy. 977 01:13:23.119 --> 01:13:25.279 When you really sit back and looking at the life, you're like you 978 01:13:25.520 --> 01:13:31.680 fu Yeah you're not. And I'm work in a bar and the dudes that 979 01:13:31.800 --> 01:13:35.359 be in here doing the most be happy. I'd be like, bro, 980 01:13:35.520 --> 01:13:40.359 come on now, like be all on the I actually had an experience with 981 01:13:40.399 --> 01:13:43.800 this, this dude forty some here. This was a couple of years ago, 982 01:13:43.920 --> 01:13:45.439 so forty something years old. I'm scoring on this Instagram. I'm like, 983 01:13:45.600 --> 01:13:49.920 okay, tell me why we get in it? And this man asked 984 01:13:49.960 --> 01:13:53.800 me. First of all, I was counting my pocket, said, uh, 985 01:13:54.520 --> 01:13:57.000 I know, it's like text time. First of all, already right 986 01:13:57.039 --> 01:14:00.479 there, like oh what actually the hell up and buy a car? I 987 01:14:00.520 --> 01:14:03.560 ain't s I'm like, first of all, baby, I don't know what 988 01:14:03.640 --> 01:14:06.680 type of women you used to do, but I am not Jersey. These 989 01:14:06.720 --> 01:14:12.399 niggas out here asking for my car. Law, you are not aiming high 990 01:14:12.560 --> 01:14:16.399 enough. You're supposed to shoot for the car. And then when you say 991 01:14:16.479 --> 01:14:20.439 no the car, bay, I can't even swim, but can we go 992 01:14:20.439 --> 01:14:28.520 get some k I was like, buy me a parachute? So yeah, 993 01:14:28.520 --> 01:14:32.359 it's man out here today you're bum trying to be on. And then another 994 01:14:32.399 --> 01:14:34.880 thing with me working in the bar, I see a lot of fun. 995 01:14:36.039 --> 01:14:39.720 Bet oh yeah, that'd be my other thing today. And I'm like, 996 01:14:39.800 --> 01:14:45.479 I'm cool on your because hm, well with shout out to the Lord. 997 01:14:47.399 --> 01:14:54.159 Definitely, I definitely I just like them dragson my business. Let me tell 998 01:14:54.199 --> 01:15:08.039 you I might my business. One thing about say the upstairs figures that we 999 01:15:08.079 --> 01:15:15.319 have we have fun allowed each other. So what would y'all say? Some 1000 01:15:15.359 --> 01:15:19.399 good places for you to meet people that are more like y'all you know that 1001 01:15:19.520 --> 01:15:29.119 are like comic con work, w w S, sneaker Con. I'm asking 1002 01:15:29.159 --> 01:15:31.279 for myself because I don't know they're not working and I don't want to come, 1003 01:15:32.239 --> 01:15:41.000 but you you gotta catch me. Go meet man at church? But 1004 01:15:41.079 --> 01:15:45.960 that might be, but I think that might be. Why not, but 1005 01:15:45.159 --> 01:15:54.720 I'm in tears the brother. Do you you think you think you're gonna meet 1006 01:15:54.760 --> 01:16:00.319 your mister right inside of the nightclub? And that's point exact. Yeah, 1007 01:16:00.359 --> 01:16:03.880 they don't mean but one being funny, but truthfully, for you, Lachelle, 1008 01:16:04.319 --> 01:16:11.439 you need to meet you. You need to look for me orient hated 1009 01:16:11.840 --> 01:16:17.359 things because one of your biggest wire manumber one is to be in one with 1010 01:16:17.520 --> 01:16:21.760 God, so you can't go to places where God is not present. I'm 1011 01:16:21.800 --> 01:16:29.279 not going to trust him to leave me, so you need more orientated, 1012 01:16:30.000 --> 01:16:36.880 right, I can't take you to ain't your heart? Let me say something. 1013 01:16:36.920 --> 01:16:44.720 I like a lot. Tell what you'll see about her time is not 1014 01:16:44.800 --> 01:16:50.960 who's not before her? I just like the heart the pictures. I definitely 1015 01:16:51.000 --> 01:16:56.800 will one anyway. I just like the heart. We call you. You 1016 01:16:56.840 --> 01:17:01.199 don't like I never? I've never. I am a lot because it's therapy. 1017 01:17:01.920 --> 01:17:05.880 But like you know, best parties are like I don't enjoy I don't. 1018 01:17:05.960 --> 01:17:10.399 I don't like you. A lot of be saying I don't. It's 1019 01:17:10.399 --> 01:17:15.239 just it's weird. Let's go ahead a lot to the strip because it's be 1020 01:17:15.279 --> 01:17:16.640 honest. It's just like how you're saying I like to go see you, 1021 01:17:18.079 --> 01:17:20.159 but you was like I want to go see a movie. I just don't 1022 01:17:20.159 --> 01:17:26.880 want to go see a movie alone. I want to eat and then I 1023 01:17:26.960 --> 01:17:30.880 just want to I want neative women around. I want neative women around what 1024 01:17:33.640 --> 01:17:41.399 I want beautiful women who talk and you know, I don't know, I'm 1025 01:17:41.439 --> 01:17:48.279 not my wings. I like do that and enjoy that. Yeah, whatever 1026 01:17:48.359 --> 01:17:55.840 you enjoy my girlfriend? Are you really my girlfriend? But that's just you 1027 01:17:55.960 --> 01:18:00.119 like, But that's what I'm saying though, Like if I can't, if 1028 01:18:00.119 --> 01:18:05.000 I can't take you somewhere that I find to be pleasurable for do we vibe 1029 01:18:05.039 --> 01:18:10.560 because you're gonna take me to this bullshit you like as your boyfriend. I 1030 01:18:10.560 --> 01:18:13.920 gotta pretend like I like it, that's true. I've been the strawberry fast. 1031 01:18:13.960 --> 01:18:18.239 I'm like, I was gonna say probably, I don't know. See 1032 01:18:18.239 --> 01:18:25.119 for me, I'm not, Yeah, so I don't. I'm very like 1033 01:18:25.159 --> 01:18:28.680 when I keep saying natural organic, I'm very fine with like it just being 1034 01:18:28.760 --> 01:18:33.399 like, you gotta put yourself out there so they're not gonna find you if 1035 01:18:33.439 --> 01:18:38.920 you want to be found. You like the like networking. I feel like 1036 01:18:38.920 --> 01:18:45.359 like like networking even stuff like that, Like listen, y'all attracted to be 1037 01:18:45.479 --> 01:18:48.720 very everywhere. Yeah, because some of the biggest at the at the work 1038 01:18:49.199 --> 01:18:58.239 that connection niggas at the network. It was funny somebody like, do you 1039 01:18:58.800 --> 01:19:02.760 our looks a big You are very visual? You feel like, look like 1040 01:19:03.119 --> 01:19:10.159 looks are men are visual beings for me, even women. The way that 1041 01:19:10.239 --> 01:19:15.079 I look at someone being attractive is how they treat people about their inner coord 1042 01:19:15.920 --> 01:19:20.600 So I mean, I agree, but I'm I'm shallow you listen. I'm 1043 01:19:20.640 --> 01:19:28.199 like, look, I'm like you if a little bit when I say, 1044 01:19:28.319 --> 01:19:34.560 maybe you're not listen, I'm nothing wrong, There's nothing I want to hear 1045 01:19:34.600 --> 01:19:43.960 this. I feel like people always think about I understand that you are a 1046 01:19:44.079 --> 01:19:48.319 person that likes to get to know people. Hear me, though, to 1047 01:19:48.479 --> 01:19:54.640 hear me, hear me, hear me, king, I don't know how 1048 01:19:54.680 --> 01:20:00.159 good your inside is. Whatever your preferences are are your preferences. My preferences 1049 01:20:00.199 --> 01:20:02.880 are going to be that in the court. My preferences are going to be 1050 01:20:02.920 --> 01:20:06.239 your relationship with God. My preferences are gonna be how you treat me and 1051 01:20:06.279 --> 01:20:09.960 how you treat the people around you. Okay, so let me ask you. 1052 01:20:10.079 --> 01:20:12.800 So when you're on that app, you not gonna know that so like 1053 01:20:13.119 --> 01:20:15.279 you see the picture? I mean no, some I'm saying, so, 1054 01:20:15.359 --> 01:20:20.960 like is that so? What would yeah? What would make you like like 1055 01:20:20.960 --> 01:20:28.960 like Jesus? And every time they give me their name, I go to 1056 01:20:29.039 --> 01:20:35.920 their social media. I see how they listen, and I stop responding on 1057 01:20:35.960 --> 01:20:42.000 social media, like to play around. That's what I said. I don't 1058 01:20:42.000 --> 01:20:44.279 want people to joine me by my social media because I be on there on 1059 01:20:44.319 --> 01:20:47.319 some pure shenanigans. But but I hope that somebody would. I hope somebody 1060 01:20:47.319 --> 01:20:50.359 would be that and be like, she likes it, she funny because I'm 1061 01:20:50.479 --> 01:20:55.079 hilarious, Like I will hope I like that, have fund I will help 1062 01:20:55.119 --> 01:21:02.880 somebody people. But I be on like I don't like that. I just 1063 01:21:03.680 --> 01:21:05.880 like that. I just like the pictures. You can't put me in a 1064 01:21:05.920 --> 01:21:13.000 box. Bro, there's no box to that. I am a I am. 1065 01:21:13.279 --> 01:21:16.199 I'm shallow that I ain't gonna hold you in the box. They're done. 1066 01:21:17.199 --> 01:21:25.720 People like you definitely jacket a box. I'm popping out. You should. 1067 01:21:25.720 --> 01:21:28.760 People be like, oh, he's so like button up and serious. 1068 01:21:28.920 --> 01:21:35.000 I'm returning. But the R word sorry. I really want you to be 1069 01:21:35.000 --> 01:21:41.239 able to go one. I'm goofball, bro, like I find like sorry, 1070 01:21:41.479 --> 01:21:45.960 and you are in a space. It feels like you're in a very 1071 01:21:45.000 --> 01:21:50.640 like heel space, a very mature space. Leave I leave people alone, 1072 01:21:53.239 --> 01:21:59.520 cut off. I'm very aware enough to know that right now I'm not none 1073 01:21:59.560 --> 01:22:03.000 of that. You gotta catch we chilling now if you want to be in 1074 01:22:03.039 --> 01:22:06.600 my space. Cool, but these are the rules and regulations, and this 1075 01:22:06.680 --> 01:22:15.039 is good. We're about to wrap this up. I'm gonna hit you out 1076 01:22:15.079 --> 01:22:17.880 with one final question. What would it take I got twenty two of them 1077 01:22:17.920 --> 01:22:24.800 for that person to get you out your comfort zone, to give them a 1078 01:22:24.920 --> 01:22:28.800 chance. I give everybody a chance. Man, that's your problem. That's 1079 01:22:28.800 --> 01:22:34.680 you. You can't give everybody chance. How to separate the women from the 1080 01:22:34.720 --> 01:22:42.319 whole woman. We have a good heart, you can't love again. I'm 1081 01:22:42.359 --> 01:22:46.199 such an energy person that you know, I gotta I gotta like, you 1082 01:22:46.239 --> 01:22:53.279 gotta have good energy, good vibe for me. Yeah, that's you. 1083 01:22:53.359 --> 01:23:03.720 Gotta have good good, good health. PROP know that, but that he 1084 01:23:03.840 --> 01:23:10.079 take care of So that's important to me too. So especially yes, So 1085 01:23:10.279 --> 01:23:14.600 I feel like I feel like I am open. I'm not really like looking 1086 01:23:14.680 --> 01:23:17.000 right now, but I'm open. So it's like if somebody comes across and 1087 01:23:17.039 --> 01:23:20.039 I'm like, okay, I see what you're doing. Like it's hard. 1088 01:23:20.279 --> 01:23:24.840 It's hard to answer that because it's like, it's not that I'm closed off 1089 01:23:24.840 --> 01:23:28.000 and not willing to give people a chance, but I just have I'm at 1090 01:23:28.000 --> 01:23:32.640 where I'm at. So what you're doing this Saturday, let's hop out. 1091 01:23:33.600 --> 01:23:40.239 It depends on it. I gotta examine that. Let's go that's your problem. 1092 01:23:40.279 --> 01:23:42.560 You can't just keep hopping out with just anybody. Ain't popping out with 1093 01:23:42.560 --> 01:23:47.920 just anybody. Let's let's be clear, because a good woman is gonna look 1094 01:23:47.960 --> 01:23:51.920 at that and not take you seriously. So because you're just going with anybody, 1095 01:23:51.960 --> 01:23:55.960 I'm just once she gets to know your heart, then she might be 1096 01:23:56.000 --> 01:24:00.119 like, Okay, if you just here, I don't be I kind of 1097 01:24:00.199 --> 01:24:03.600 just want to be on that type of time. I don't that's finely a 1098 01:24:03.640 --> 01:24:12.600 serious dat I am. I'm not. I don't know. That's wild as 1099 01:24:12.600 --> 01:24:15.920 a dude to be a serial dater because the expectation is for every day. 1100 01:24:16.439 --> 01:24:20.520 You are a financial provider for that because a lot of a lot of men 1101 01:24:20.399 --> 01:24:24.239 can't be alone. I'm not saying him, but a lot of men can't 1102 01:24:24.279 --> 01:24:29.359 be experience I learned from ship. But you gotta if you can make it 1103 01:24:29.399 --> 01:24:30.880 to five days, you can have me. You can make it to five 1104 01:24:30.960 --> 01:24:39.399 days, because five days it's hard to get to because I can't get two 1105 01:24:39.439 --> 01:24:46.279 days. Time. I went on a trick by myself. That's ye. 1106 01:24:47.000 --> 01:24:53.239 People keep saying that, right, we walked around this more for the day 1107 01:24:53.279 --> 01:25:00.239 by ourself. I want to know by myself and twenty and halfw want to 1108 01:25:00.239 --> 01:25:02.800 be around here too long. You don't know about you go down to Atlanta 1109 01:25:03.039 --> 01:25:09.640 and I went to Miami. I went to Miami by myself. Anything I 1110 01:25:09.800 --> 01:25:14.079 ever heard about Atlanta, it's purely but it is but for me, I 1111 01:25:14.079 --> 01:25:18.000 don't like trouble alone A lot of if you want to go, don't be 1112 01:25:18.119 --> 01:25:27.199 mistaken as a drug mule. Why you put that on that answer? What 1113 01:25:27.359 --> 01:25:31.560 was love? Because we we we come to the realization love move a target 1114 01:25:31.640 --> 01:25:35.439 that's not going to be the same for anybody. And it looks like a 1115 01:25:35.439 --> 01:25:40.000 lot of women, what's love to you today may not be love to you. 1116 01:25:40.000 --> 01:25:43.079 You could have loved kindness. I want a man that's kind You know 1117 01:25:43.119 --> 01:25:45.000 what my therapist asked me what I wanted. I want to sit you on 1118 01:25:45.039 --> 01:25:49.199 a blind day. But go ahead, keep going. She was like, 1119 01:25:48.720 --> 01:25:57.399 I want to blind. Yeah, I want to see a Johnny Tree today. 1120 01:25:57.840 --> 01:26:12.039 We got that looks like right now, I'm just saying like a little 1121 01:26:12.039 --> 01:26:17.000 hard to get. Actually I got somebody. Actually we just spent the time. 1122 01:26:17.239 --> 01:26:21.880 Oh my thing, My thing is this bro Like I don't have a 1123 01:26:21.880 --> 01:26:26.279 problem spending time with somebody. Now, I'm not gonna have sextion. No, 1124 01:26:26.279 --> 01:26:28.760 but it's just like, you gotta get to five days, and it's 1125 01:26:28.800 --> 01:26:30.920 hard to get to five day. You're gonna do for the love of john 1126 01:26:30.960 --> 01:26:34.840 you know what I'm saying, it's hard to get to We're gonna do for 1127 01:26:34.880 --> 01:26:38.600 the love of Johnny. It's hard to get the five days, That's all 1128 01:26:38.640 --> 01:26:42.239 I'm saying. So then she get the five I really like her, and 1129 01:26:42.359 --> 01:26:45.199 I found out that I really like her. That first day is just because 1130 01:26:45.720 --> 01:26:50.319 he wants Yeah, it'd be that. The second one was like, Okay, 1131 01:26:50.359 --> 01:26:53.960 she didn't fuck it up on the first time, Let's see that she 1132 01:26:54.159 --> 01:26:57.760 is who she said she was. That third one is like yeah, the 1133 01:26:57.840 --> 01:27:00.640 fourth one is like, all right, let's go ahead, feel this deal 1134 01:27:00.720 --> 01:27:06.840 real quickly. Five town. Never mind, I don't go He's not definitely 1135 01:27:06.880 --> 01:27:15.439 gonna but you might want to funk out. He's just saying if he won't, 1136 01:27:15.960 --> 01:27:18.760 he's willing to give it up because five days probably the course of two 1137 01:27:18.800 --> 01:27:30.600 months, two days a week. Yeah, it all depends on how so 1138 01:27:30.640 --> 01:27:32.279 it might be six months before we get to the second date. I don't 1139 01:27:32.319 --> 01:27:39.520 even know. You're not intentional dating, man, Yeah, you want to 1140 01:27:39.560 --> 01:27:43.000 go to I ain't never that we just go. That's a whole new level 1141 01:27:43.039 --> 01:27:45.680 of border for me to call you gonna volunteer my pockets to you. It's 1142 01:27:45.840 --> 01:27:51.279 thirty dollars. I think. I think people are intentional because they don't know 1143 01:27:51.319 --> 01:27:57.760 what the difference between dating and they just throw it all the one big bag. 1144 01:27:58.880 --> 01:28:00.199 I know the levels of different. It's like if I like you, 1145 01:28:00.239 --> 01:28:04.479 though, you're gonna know that. Yeah, I'm gonna be alright once wrap 1146 01:28:04.520 --> 01:28:10.600 this up? All right? So you still got a question? Do you 1147 01:28:10.640 --> 01:28:14.479 have a question? Because I want to know what you get out? You 1148 01:28:14.560 --> 01:28:17.840 know, what when when? When we hit the anybody you can ask Johnny 1149 01:28:17.880 --> 01:28:26.159 whatever you want. But let's get let's get through this right, let's get 1150 01:28:26.159 --> 01:28:30.319 through this now. What was you saying? Tom? It's time to go 1151 01:28:30.359 --> 01:28:32.199 home? All right? So well, what we're gonna do before we go 1152 01:28:32.279 --> 01:28:35.920 home? So, like I like to do like random ship in my personal 1153 01:28:35.960 --> 01:28:41.239 time. So sometimes I like to sit on my phone and create notes. 1154 01:28:42.039 --> 01:28:48.680 So I got like twenty five random questions. I'm right, yeah, what 1155 01:28:48.880 --> 01:28:51.680 is? The list is kind of short, so I can only take twenty 1156 01:28:51.680 --> 01:28:59.560 two. That's if you guys want to play, you're gonna play a rapid 1157 01:29:00.199 --> 01:29:04.239 go ahead, of course, I'm here. You can ask him to. 1158 01:29:04.399 --> 01:29:09.479 Usually when I write these my female go ahead. If you feel like there's 1159 01:29:09.479 --> 01:29:19.560 a male question you can ask. I said, Oh yeah, I think 1160 01:29:23.359 --> 01:29:30.600 my life has disappeared? Are you an only child? All right? What's 1161 01:29:30.680 --> 01:29:36.880 your favorite comfort? Snack? Comfort? Like me? I like high fries, 1162 01:29:39.199 --> 01:29:44.399 plain las with chips and dips with chips and dip with a PEPSI no 1163 01:29:44.479 --> 01:29:58.399 pickle, that's right? Cheese was plain cheesecake? Nope, put no chill 1164 01:30:00.199 --> 01:30:09.119 on the one from one A tame Rachel conversation like my skills eight solid. 1165 01:30:10.279 --> 01:30:15.960 I'm a digger bro. I can talk about anything. Do you prefer looks 1166 01:30:15.039 --> 01:30:21.520 or personality? Personality? I mean personality, but the looks gotta draw me 1167 01:30:21.560 --> 01:30:26.680 in. I ain't always I'm a little shallow in that way. You look 1168 01:30:26.720 --> 01:30:30.119 good. You look good. It's a pretty thing. We got pretty privilege 1169 01:30:31.560 --> 01:30:36.640 ups around track. Bringing the proper personality is attracted to me, then I'll 1170 01:30:36.680 --> 01:30:45.279 be attracted to Yeah, what about your personal You said personality first? But 1171 01:30:45.319 --> 01:30:51.399 I'm like, you got you got you gotta look at you gotta because then 1172 01:30:51.560 --> 01:30:55.000 if we get in it, like you could be attractive in the handout, 1173 01:30:55.039 --> 01:30:58.000 no personality. It's like right, and it's like, bro, you have 1174 01:30:58.359 --> 01:31:01.000 what if you gonna laugh about the corny joke? I can't funk with you. 1175 01:31:00.920 --> 01:31:10.520 You don't laugh on my what's the shoe? You? Thirtee? Grand 1176 01:31:10.600 --> 01:31:19.960 gestures are small thoughtful, small thought mm hmmm, oh grand gester TII what's 1177 01:31:20.000 --> 01:31:30.880 in your whole bank? My hop like I don't have my makeup, white, 1178 01:31:32.920 --> 01:31:42.680 my makeup. I can't care Regie all right, caveat to that same 1179 01:31:42.760 --> 01:31:51.399 question. Spend all my stuff that I would need at home. A Jason 1180 01:31:51.520 --> 01:31:57.399 question? Jason question, how long until he sees you without your makeup? 1181 01:32:00.439 --> 01:32:02.920 How many dates before he's able to see you without your mak oh bare face, 1182 01:32:03.239 --> 01:32:08.680 bare face, swimt pants, hand time chilling with no makeup? That's 1183 01:32:10.600 --> 01:32:15.760 very Yeah, I don't know. I don't have like a like I'm not 1184 01:32:15.800 --> 01:32:16.479 just type like, oh my god, he can't see me. It's just 1185 01:32:16.520 --> 01:32:19.039 like when I when we get ready to go out and have my makeup phone. 1186 01:32:19.079 --> 01:32:23.039 But then if it's just like a casual like we just sworn to. 1187 01:32:25.000 --> 01:32:30.359 Yeah, I don't got no spend of that. You all gotta go. 1188 01:32:31.560 --> 01:32:34.600 You don't got to spend the night back, She'll just say she don't got 1189 01:32:34.600 --> 01:32:38.840 no place to spend the night at you. You don't keep the Bible in 1190 01:32:38.920 --> 01:32:42.800 that moment. Don't got a travel sized Bible? Yes, and a bottle 1191 01:32:42.880 --> 01:32:45.960 water with a two friends? You only have new Testaments? Or do you 1192 01:32:45.000 --> 01:32:54.520 have the full thing? I respect? All right? You got big parties 1193 01:32:54.640 --> 01:33:00.479 or a small gathers? Like a kickback? Kickbacks, kickback a crowd? 1194 01:33:00.720 --> 01:33:13.520 Do you know your body count? Yeah? If you don't as favoring fruit, 1195 01:33:14.039 --> 01:33:19.800 fruit, fruit, pineapples? Do we just come fast and the grass? 1196 01:33:24.560 --> 01:33:27.640 I do? I don't think I care about you, like if you 1197 01:33:27.680 --> 01:33:31.720 want to, I like water. But you're a nigga for have you ever 1198 01:33:31.760 --> 01:33:42.079 been out of the country. I went to Curesle. What the hell is 1199 01:33:42.079 --> 01:33:49.960 that Russia? It's the island and the Caribbean. You want to I've heard, 1200 01:33:51.800 --> 01:33:56.479 oh some bad ones in the standard, That's what I saw. A 1201 01:33:56.560 --> 01:34:01.039 sh I was at the music Okay you left the country. No, we 1202 01:34:01.600 --> 01:34:05.880 didn't know they was there. We were just down there and it was just 1203 01:34:05.920 --> 01:34:10.479 like, oh the music festivals, like they're here. It's like a bea 1204 01:34:12.239 --> 01:34:19.760 would you day outside your race? I mean I'm mixed. I can't outside. 1205 01:34:21.840 --> 01:34:30.439 I would you will know I haven't not anymore. Yes, Tom, 1206 01:34:30.520 --> 01:34:33.479 we know why, we know what what happened, the whole story. That's 1207 01:34:33.520 --> 01:34:41.439 not for this episode. Do you have a kink? Yes, that's all 1208 01:34:41.439 --> 01:34:45.760 we need. That's that's just the questionn't ask you what is your king? 1209 01:34:47.399 --> 01:34:53.119 Yeah, you're not having enough sex? Find out I'm not having anything when 1210 01:34:53.159 --> 01:34:58.319 you we will come back year old sons. No, no, you had, 1211 01:34:58.880 --> 01:35:00.439 But I ask you, are you having enough now to know if you 1212 01:35:00.479 --> 01:35:04.920 have a kink? I don't know. I think he just doesn't realize that 1213 01:35:05.279 --> 01:35:16.399 you like to be praised. What next question? Off the Yeah, what's 1214 01:35:16.479 --> 01:35:26.880 your non sexual attraction to people? Confidence? I like, I guess it's 1215 01:35:26.920 --> 01:35:30.279 on the lines of confidence too. Like I'm gonna track it to a man 1216 01:35:30.359 --> 01:35:40.239 that speaks well, like a speaker, eloquence, confident, but not arrogant. 1217 01:35:39.279 --> 01:35:44.880 I feel like my job in life is to humble arrogant, and that 1218 01:35:45.039 --> 01:35:51.359 is why niggas come at you, because you challenges all humble, the humblers. 1219 01:35:53.520 --> 01:35:58.079 I'm a humble So it's like a good skin, you good skin? 1220 01:35:58.119 --> 01:36:03.119 That's this definitely. I don't know why. I just like maybe I can 1221 01:36:03.159 --> 01:36:15.199 see or bad boy hybrid. I would love a hybrid? Can you really 1222 01:36:15.239 --> 01:36:18.239 be yes, a nice bad boy? Yes, just like you can do 1223 01:36:19.479 --> 01:36:27.479 yes, I like retired, yes exactly. So you like gang members but 1224 01:36:27.520 --> 01:36:30.239 they love their mama. No, I like it. I like the man, 1225 01:36:30.399 --> 01:36:32.159 like if you a little, I don't mind rough around the edges. 1226 01:36:32.760 --> 01:36:35.319 I like street smarts. I ain't saying I want I don't want no gang 1227 01:36:35.439 --> 01:36:39.000 like still in the streets type of dude. But like if you if you 1228 01:36:39.960 --> 01:36:42.640 yeah, I don't, I don't. I'm not like a judgmental type of 1229 01:36:42.640 --> 01:36:45.159 person, so whatever, Like if you that was your past, I'm not 1230 01:36:45.359 --> 01:36:47.600 tripping. It depends what you did, though, Like hold on, but 1231 01:36:48.119 --> 01:36:50.359 like a little I don't know, I'm a little rough around edges. I 1232 01:36:50.399 --> 01:36:54.359 don't mind a little rough round. But how have you grown? Like I 1233 01:36:54.399 --> 01:36:58.199 don't want you steal forty in the streets, bro, Like what did you 1234 01:36:58.279 --> 01:37:01.239 learn? Did you take that money and flip ft into some legal Like I 1235 01:37:01.319 --> 01:37:05.119 wanted to be street smart, but also you know, be able to go 1236 01:37:05.239 --> 01:37:11.920 to opened up seven barber shops. But he flipped it and he make us 1237 01:37:11.920 --> 01:37:14.600 a legit money. Now, I was all right, that's called criminal enterprise. 1238 01:37:15.279 --> 01:37:21.199 That's a fella it is, you know, like I would stay like 1239 01:37:21.319 --> 01:37:27.279 you know who I love and y'all you look like her. I love Nixy 1240 01:37:27.399 --> 01:37:35.239 Hussey like everyone just like he life what he was doing before. He like, 1241 01:37:35.319 --> 01:37:44.760 oh my god, that was that's to me? Like that yeah, 1242 01:37:44.960 --> 01:37:48.560 all that good stuff. Who That's what they asked. One next question, 1243 01:37:48.880 --> 01:37:51.479 I'll just ask a questions. You're trying to go home. Do you have 1244 01:37:51.520 --> 01:38:00.800 a toxic trade yes, the yeah, everybody has the toxic t Yes. 1245 01:38:02.039 --> 01:38:06.800 I mean I'll have a nicknamed t T talk to. I think I just 1246 01:38:06.800 --> 01:38:11.760 need to be open. I need to be more open. I be distant 1247 01:38:12.680 --> 01:38:17.600 sometimes. It was really a yes enough question. I had to get into 1248 01:38:17.600 --> 01:38:23.600 depth, but I appreciate it. Damn man said, your real life crazy. 1249 01:38:23.760 --> 01:38:30.079 You're sitting there to mother before. Don't have you started learning about fun 1250 01:38:31.199 --> 01:38:35.279 here though? You don't make sure he has fun. He's enjoy life. 1251 01:38:35.520 --> 01:38:42.439 You're going to be the right. You're like a Christian like it's like the 1252 01:38:42.520 --> 01:38:49.800 human embodiment of Christian mingle you are. I am not. Do you prefer 1253 01:38:49.960 --> 01:38:59.760 a shower or a bye? That's a good both, he said. You 1254 01:39:00.119 --> 01:39:06.159 the bath girls, we met bad bombs and now relaxation. I have taken 1255 01:39:06.199 --> 01:39:14.479 a bad years. You living yourself life time. I'm not touching you like 1256 01:39:14.560 --> 01:39:17.359 I'm a if you out here with the bath bomb bro, you just shout 1257 01:39:17.399 --> 01:39:24.039 off taking myself, might have candles, set the moved, read yourself a 1258 01:39:24.079 --> 01:39:28.960 book. You be in the tub like run like the speaker on the window. 1259 01:39:29.199 --> 01:39:30.760 And I don't know who the fuck y'all are. That's why when she 1260 01:39:30.800 --> 01:39:39.119 said house could be you don't wear e lotion. I don't need to. 1261 01:39:42.760 --> 01:39:45.640 I am comfortable. Do you have a type? Yeah? She just really 1262 01:39:45.640 --> 01:39:51.239 said it a lot of times. Okay, just like looks like a personal 1263 01:39:51.439 --> 01:40:02.760 like you have. I feel like we don't have everybody. Everybody? Yeah, 1264 01:40:02.960 --> 01:40:13.920 can you write in curses? Can you write my ship? Kind of 1265 01:40:13.960 --> 01:40:16.720 like a blame between Frank and Curse at science time? And I gave up 1266 01:40:18.560 --> 01:40:29.720 Ronie or a T shirt and a Bondet T shirt, You too, T 1267 01:40:29.880 --> 01:40:33.039 shirt and scarfs. You out here giving away big T shirt, pussy. 1268 01:40:34.880 --> 01:40:41.399 I am almost sporting, I too, man, give me something given that 1269 01:40:41.479 --> 01:40:45.800 niggas and I'm almost you get it out. This is how we wrap it 1270 01:40:45.960 --> 01:40:56.800 up tonight. A question. Just don't wear my boy. I like his 1271 01:40:56.920 --> 01:41:00.039 T shirt. She came. She came to the room. Now you're talking 1272 01:41:00.079 --> 01:41:05.520 about T shirt. It's not like last question that we can't go. You 1273 01:41:05.520 --> 01:41:15.840 guys believe you guys believe in gender. Do you believe in gender roles in 1274 01:41:15.920 --> 01:41:19.720 some ways? But not like I don't think. I don't think it's up 1275 01:41:19.720 --> 01:41:25.399 to the woman to cook and clean, but you know they do have there's 1276 01:41:25.399 --> 01:41:28.159 just some ship. I can't do that. She can, she can't do 1277 01:41:28.199 --> 01:41:30.520 that. I don't. I think I don't believe I'm a traditional I'm not 1278 01:41:30.560 --> 01:41:34.039 a traditional type of person. That's hard to answer. Now, I want 1279 01:41:34.039 --> 01:41:38.840 you to just be a regular human being, Like do what needs to be 1280 01:41:38.840 --> 01:41:43.840 done. Yeah, Like nigga, if you were leaving the house before you 1281 01:41:43.960 --> 01:41:46.319 left me sleeping, you say that the coverage needs to be taking dropping on 1282 01:41:46.319 --> 01:41:49.479 the lay out. If you don't walk past it, don't do what you 1283 01:41:49.520 --> 01:41:55.479 gotta do. Come home and be like take the coverage out you left before 1284 01:41:55.560 --> 01:42:01.920 me. Now your next to the garage. But but do you wash the 1285 01:42:01.960 --> 01:42:05.279 dishes because woke up. If I was in the kitchen and I was cooking, 1286 01:42:05.319 --> 01:42:08.880 I'm gonna watch the dishes if you want to cook. What if she 1287 01:42:08.880 --> 01:42:11.479 cook last right with the bed, got up on the way out, took 1288 01:42:11.520 --> 01:42:20.720 the trash out you woke up later on the Microwaves go on an episode of 1289 01:42:20.840 --> 01:42:25.920 Raw See. I feel like as I get older, ship like that. 1290 01:42:26.159 --> 01:42:30.319 It was just because to me, that's a childhood trump because you're gonna come 1291 01:42:30.319 --> 01:42:31.800 in the house and you're gonna see something ain't done. You gonna yeah, 1292 01:42:32.720 --> 01:42:35.199 ship, my mama would do you come in the house and you see something 1293 01:42:35.399 --> 01:42:41.159 done, you start yell. You're growing bro, so so so this is 1294 01:42:41.199 --> 01:42:43.880 what I'll be trying to explain to you, know, my little bro. 1295 01:42:43.920 --> 01:42:46.359 I'm like, look, man, we all still live here with moms, 1296 01:42:46.680 --> 01:42:51.800 so let's make life as easy as possible. Because it's three of us in 1297 01:42:51.840 --> 01:42:55.640 here. We're all grown as adults. And I feel like, if you 1298 01:42:55.640 --> 01:42:58.479 don't want nobody talking to you, and you know what they're gonna talk about 1299 01:42:58.760 --> 01:43:02.399 doing about talking to me. So I know if I'm finna go downstairs for 1300 01:43:02.520 --> 01:43:08.399 my evening activities, I'm in the kitchen. So if I'm here, let's 1301 01:43:08.520 --> 01:43:11.600 wash the dish get out. So once I'm done with everything and I'm sitting 1302 01:43:11.600 --> 01:43:14.560 on the couch on my vibe, you can't you can't say, hey, 1303 01:43:14.600 --> 01:43:18.439 bro, you didn't do it, peace right. I just I don't want 1304 01:43:18.479 --> 01:43:21.560 you talking to me, So whatever you want to talk about, I'm gonna 1305 01:43:21.560 --> 01:43:26.000 get it out of the ways, and you don't speak to me. But 1306 01:43:26.159 --> 01:43:30.760 I like, thank everybody for coming around with me on this episode of all 1307 01:43:30.840 --> 01:43:33.319 right, wait, what more thing before we get out of here. Last 1308 01:43:33.399 --> 01:43:41.039 night I had a moment of damn, you might be getting old. My 1309 01:43:41.239 --> 01:43:48.079 sister turned twenty seven on the twenty second we are Now, I'm not oblivious. 1310 01:43:48.199 --> 01:43:51.720 I know my little sister day tonight or whatever the fuck you do with 1311 01:43:51.800 --> 01:43:56.680 niggas, that's what you do. I'm not oblivious. You're twenty seven. 1312 01:43:56.680 --> 01:44:00.000 You're doing something. But she ain't never brought the work to the house. 1313 01:44:01.920 --> 01:44:11.960 So last night I was downstairs getting knocking the ship out. I'm like, 1314 01:44:12.000 --> 01:44:15.960 I'm from the road. It's blowing washing this and I'm gonna stand outside smoking. 1315 01:44:15.800 --> 01:44:19.560 Now, I forgot my sister wasn't in the house. Or usually when 1316 01:44:19.560 --> 01:44:21.399 she's not in the house, I leave on the doors on the lot. 1317 01:44:21.439 --> 01:44:27.760 Because I'm downstairs, I forgot she wasn't home. So I had to get 1318 01:44:27.840 --> 01:44:30.039 up and go open the door for us. All the doors a lot so 1319 01:44:30.119 --> 01:44:33.239 and she walk in the nigga bop being with his head down. I'm like 1320 01:44:33.720 --> 01:44:43.359 I want to say, but look for in my eyes, nigga, what 1321 01:44:43.359 --> 01:44:51.840 what bro in this room? Man? How old he right? It don't 1322 01:44:51.880 --> 01:44:58.399 matter how old you get me like a motherfucking man. Bro, I'm not 1323 01:44:58.479 --> 01:45:00.840 on your I'm not on your ne I know your ass about ship. Bro. 1324 01:45:00.880 --> 01:45:04.199 I understand what's going on. But that was funny saying to me. 1325 01:45:05.880 --> 01:45:15.640 Got his head down. But whatever bro too, Bro, I would have. 1326 01:45:16.600 --> 01:45:21.000 I would have because he didn't come in there just stiff arm that nigga 1327 01:45:21.880 --> 01:45:26.800 like greeting me like a real nigga. Hold your head and look me on 1328 01:45:26.880 --> 01:45:34.399 my eyes. Man, you yeah, just because I ain't never met the 1329 01:45:34.439 --> 01:45:41.199 action. That's like when your sister like bump into the bitches bring. I 1330 01:45:41.199 --> 01:45:48.479 sat at the house nigging out of here last night. Thank y'all for tuning 1331 01:45:48.600 --> 01:45:55.000 into this first episode on this long tour. Thanks for having We got several 1332 01:45:55.079 --> 01:45:59.920 dates and I thought myself, like life skinned nigga, Okay, I know 1333 01:46:00.079 --> 01:46:02.319 my little sister. I learned something new every day. We like to thank 1334 01:46:02.840 --> 01:46:13.279 Johnny and Lachelle for popping in with us. Make sure you check us out 1335 01:46:13.279 --> 01:46:15.319 of all streaming platform that Spreaker, Spotify, iHeart Radio wherever it is looking 1336 01:46:15.319 --> 01:46:19.560 at the show. The Death Fresh Show will eventually be back to normal in 1337 01:46:19.600 --> 01:46:24.640 the spring. We don't know yet, but make sure you build a lookout 1338 01:46:24.640 --> 01:46:28.960 for where I come from and kickboxing somewhere in between. All that. With 1339 01:46:29.000 --> 01:46:30.640 that being said, we ought to hear people peace, Peace,