WEBVTT

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Good morning, Metroplex. How are
we doing. Let's get out there,

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let's get it going. Big one
today. Well, here's you up.

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Cowboys win, MAVs win, Appenheimer
wins, so much stuff. Big Show

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Todays, including We'll talk some Cowboys
and NFL playoffs for you at seven at

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eight o'clock, eight thirty Golden Globes
review at nine. We just need to

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get rid of a ward shows in
general and a host of fens Taylor Swift,

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Well MAVs for you in thirty minutes. We also have the big story

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about the gaping hole inside the plane
and the cannon ball heard around the world

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when the guy with an absent penis
jumped into the aquarium at Best Pro Shops

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at Alabama. It was a wild
weekend. Not how cold are those tanks?

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They have to be so crazy.
I mean from the far away shot,

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you couldn't even tell that he had
a male appendage that counts the micro

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Oh yeah, is micro pe affliction? Like is that a medical thing or

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is it just there's some sort of
cutoff where you're like, all right,

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I'm in the club. We would
have to get someone on who would know

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something about that, and we had
so much luck. Last week someone on

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who had a medical penis extension.
But I'm sure the micro peen lines are

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going to just blow up. One
guy called in. She just said he

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couldn't hold through the break. So
but we're gonna we would have to get

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an expert on you know, that
type of thing, because we know anything

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about that world. Nah, I
think that guy had I don't think it

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was micro. I think micro is
when it's like a basically it never develops

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beyond five years old. Shake that
tiny d one seemed like it was just

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you know, I don't know.
Did you see the close up shot when

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they had him arrested. I mean
it it had for the hills and the

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hills were inside his body, and
then did you zoom in further like KT

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did, had a little smiley face
on it. Maybe he's what do they

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say as a grower, not a
shower. Okay, and that's fine.

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Actually that's an interesting discussion. But
even those that are growers are not showers.

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You don't spend a day looking like
that. Yeah, I mean when

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you when you're getting arrested and you
jumped out of a cold pool, maybe

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you look like you know, an
eighth or a an eight year old,

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but when it's business time, maybe
he turns into Danny D. Yeah,

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okay, Danny D. Is that
what you call it? No, that's

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not even him, Danny D.
Is that a star? Yeah, it's

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a star a brit How do you
go, Britt, How do you know

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that that's gonna be y'all's era?
No? No, he's squarely in the

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game right now. Yeah, google
him, ladies. It's like Jordi is

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a little Latin kid. Okay,
Jordy just like Danny D. An idiot,

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but that he looks like, you
know, a little buffalo nickel holding

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it between his thighs. It's weird. Is the birthday of Tyler Quinn today?

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She's twenty six? You guys in
on that not really a legend?

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No, no, it doesn't matter. I know the dudes, dudes,

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candid Cam slam, those are the
ones I keep up with you guys,

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keep tracking the guys in the world
of Adultlam. But we're tracking all of

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our heroes. Yeah, right,
absolutely we are. Nothing makes me happier

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than seeing Mikey's reaction to the referencing
of the random throwing out for him looking

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right at me and knowing I can't
hide that I know exactly who he's talking

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about. Soap micro penis can't occur
on its own, but it often accompanies

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other health problems due to hormonal disorders
that could have been birth conditions as well.

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And it is a penis that measures
three point six seven inches or less

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when gently stretched gently. That's the
definition a little hand ruler in here.

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This comes out a lot when just
keep guessing with our fingers. Jeez,

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I don't know what to say.
Treatments. We'll shout out to that guy

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that's a there's not a cure.
Three point seven inches is like that.

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I've said it for years that it's
a common joke in pop culture, and

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it's almost like making fun of someone
for being tall, or making someone for

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being short, like they had no
say in the matter. They popped out

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and this is what they were going
to be. M okay, And you

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were making little jokes because you tend
to be an advocate for the man with

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the defender. Yes, I'm a
defendant person if that person right now a

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vocal defender. So I'm saying it's
no different than racism. The fact that

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you would make fun of someone's skin
color, you know how stupid, that

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is. I bet it's a lot
different than racism. No, it's not

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that different. It's quite different.
Well, he's right in that it's because

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of in front of someone for something
they had no control over, and it's

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just a physical aspect of there being
I agree with that. I think yes,

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and you racism with underwearing pants.
You know, there's a deeper discussion

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for sure, But not for FM. That's for HF. It's for AM

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and Color TV that debate. Do
you guys believe in curses? What is

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he talking about? I don't believe
in curses. No one, man,

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no no. So I told you
guys. I've watched a little bit of

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the show on Showtime called The Curse, which is about a real event that

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happened in Nathan Fielder's life. The
actor Nathan Fielder, and he had this

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concept and it is about a girl, like a little kid, a girl

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who said I curse you, and
then his life had events in the next

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couple of months that did okay,
and then he was trying to right the

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wrong and all that stuff. I
was kind of thinking with this with the

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Cowboys, So if the Curse happened, the Jimmy Johnson thing. If that's

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real and there was legit sold my
soul to the I would sell my soul

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to the devil. For Super Bowl
things, you kind of do have to

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beat the Packers first, right to
lift the curse, like you got the

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game against the Lions, which is
a fluke right after Jimmy goes into the

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Ring of Honor, and then you
get the Packers. And then for all

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you non believers out there, you
would get the Lions again and then beat

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them fair and square. And then
who's the other franchise that you would have

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to beat for the curse? It
would be the forty nine Ers. And

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then your front runner in the AFC
to the Super Bowl, in my estimation,

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is not the Ravens. It's the
Bills. I know the Ravens haven't

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buy whatever. The nineties Cowboys who
beat the Bills what twice? Twice?

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Yeah, but they did lose four
in a row. Then you go beat

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the Bills again just as a commemoration
of thirty years ago. I kind of

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think there's something here. Do you
think if it was a curse though,

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and it was being excised exercise Hampster, it would be the Bills to beat

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the Cowboys wouldn't that be the the
real curse that's gonna would be getting blasted?

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Well? Yeah, are the bills
the ones that are cursed? Well,

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nobody's cursed. Jerry Jones cursed.
No, no one's cursed. He

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lifted the curse by putting Jimmy in
the ring. Would your mind change on

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curses if it played out in this
fation? Why the Lions involved in the

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curse? Like it's a it's all
flimsy, everything's flims things. You say,

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everything's flimsy. There are no hard
answers to anything. So because the

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Packers beat up on the Cowboys a
few times in the last decade or whatever,

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uh huh, that's curse level one. Yeah, and then Chris level

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two would be the Lions beating them
fair and square even a a week.

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Associate ciation with the head coach too. If you think about that McCarthy getting

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revenge on Green but just playing into
that because it was Jimmy and finally getting

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rid of this petty thing that you
had forever. This is almost as flimsy,

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of not more flimsy than the whole
Jeff Epstein eleven letters thing. Yeah,

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last week, like you can find
you can find a cursor, a

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conspiracy and anything hard enough, right, and just throw the Lions in there

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like that's some sort of that fits
the your narrative. Then well then you

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just say and then the Lions.
What about the Lions? Look it up,

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do your own research. That's that's
that's froyd. That's the easiest one.

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The Lions is for all the non
believers. You have to beat them

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fair and square, not you just
had a ref or some Vegas conspiracy.

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But it's my timeline is flooded with
that that Michael Parsons is still the league

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has it out for Michael Parsons because
he didn't get called for holding again yesterday.

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Watch every game in the NFL,
people, every pass rusher gets held.

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I'm sorry, you're not the only
one, Mike, go oh my

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god. But it's not like you're
guaranteed. Even if. I mean,

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it could be the Bucks or Philly, right, could be fit your curse

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thing a little bit better, because
at least it's a divisional deal. Yeah,

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but beating the Lions for real,
for real, not after a ref

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gave you the game, there's something. Maybe it wouldn't be Philly because likely

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the way this would play out as
Philly would go play San Francisco and get

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destroyed by them. Not the Rams
beat the Lions. Not the Rams beat

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the Lions, and then the Rams
take San Francisco, so you could get

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Philly. You're right, see,
so if you want it to be that

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way, that's fine. Hey they're
loose. Nothing's firm ever for me.

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So it's like when I was playing
at yesterday, like the number one thing

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I did not want was Packers and
Cowboys because I'm a lifelong Packers fan who

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wants the Cowboys to do well.
Okay, and this happens. I mean,

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dude, I had It's the only
time I've ever like been like nearly

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assaulted. I had a Cowboys fan
launch a and now I remember it very

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vividly. It was the number twelve
striped pool ball like in Billiards. Threw

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it at me one time because I
said I was a Packers fan on the

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air. Now, people are nuts. Okay, did he just hoss it

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at you or no, he threw
it overhund uh. You know that's it's

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kind of a blur where it was
back to say he was at the Omni.

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It was at the Omni. It
was in the press box bar.

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Okay, they're doing a show there, and I was we were just like

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on Friday, like, what do
you thing's gonna happen in the game.

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It's before the twenty sixteen game Packers
thirty four Cowboys thirty one. I predicted

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Packers thirty four Cowboys thirty one would
be the game again, launched a pool

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ball at me. Is he what
kind of a submarine delivery? I don't

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know. Again, I don't remember. You think you just tossed it and

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landing on the table loudly in front
of you. No, no, because

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that's a soul. It's like if
he really threw it at you, that's

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serious. So in front of us
is a bunch of cowboys fans, okay,

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And it was kind of running through
the generic thing on the Friday broadcast

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what is gonna happen? You know, and the crowd's kind of getting into

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oh oh, the time has where
we've been in skin of course, been

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and skinned with cowboys, And I
was like, to be honest, man,

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like you had the crowd and the
palmier hand Aaron Rodgers. I did,

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like the tremendous actor you are now, I did go full heel turned

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as I stood up in the chair, it started getting them all revved up

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and calling Benn and skin Homers and
all that stuff, and said, I

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just think it would be thirty one
guy. He probably just Tim wakefielded a

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knuckler that harmlessly landed on Kevin's live
spot. Copyes, fast, did it

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touch your body? It did touch
your body? No, I caught it

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O nice catch, but it wouldn't
have killed the Randy Johnson bird flying across

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if there was one. But it
was not soft and it was uncalled for,

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and the guy was escorted out like
it was like a very tense thing,

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like what the You had him thrown
out? You had him escort it

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out. I think everyone saw it
was like what the hell like, dude,

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it was a shocking thing. Point
is what happened in that game.

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Packers won thirty four to thirty one. And if you guys are just listened

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to me for a second, I'm
right all the e f in time,

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never wrong. I tried to like
I offered my advice all the time,

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and no one takes me seriously.
And you know why, It's because I'm

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a little bit shorter than the rest
of you. And all these things that

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I can't control. Yeah, back
to the penis thing again. Yes,

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00:14:01.559 --> 00:14:05.159
the penis and you sit here and
we do this and we think we know

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everything until you start to listen.
And that's all I'm asking for people to

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do right now, to listen.
Are we still talking about the curse.

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We're all kind of asking people to
listen. Tweet from a guy today,

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Guys, you guys go do the
Miami Mall story. We did it Friday.

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I need you all to listen.
Need it, like need it,

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00:14:24.840 --> 00:14:30.519
not want it, need it.
Listen to Kevin, everybody that you're too.

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I curse could all with the climb
this opportunity to listen to you regularly,

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and now what do we do?
I accept, but there's no such

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thing as curses. Kevin. Okay, you just said you're always right.

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Then you talk about a curse and
the lions were involved somehow could be We'll

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see. Hey, if you ever
get assaulted in public and I'm around,

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that is that will not happen.
He's going to catch hands. Let me

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just tell you, unless the dude
is bigger than me, or it looks

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super scary in any way, you
know, or like crazy eye. Yeah,

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I remember one of those three scenarios, I have your back and showing

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allegiance with Mikey, I will quickly
notify and quietly notify the manager and have

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them thrown out, so much so
that Daniel will lock himself in the manager's

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office the facility just to make sure
that the manager is not in the office

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and is actually out they're doing his
job. And then you're in there covering

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the management part total of this business
until this guy's gone. Till this scum

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is gone, it won't happen,
Kevin. On my watch, this dude

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is jacked, then I'm out.
I'm totally can't be really nice. And

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we haven't done downbeat remotes in the
morning, really, And I'm told that's

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because I'm too toxic. There's too
much potential for violence taking me to the

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streets. Yeah, I doesn't have
anything to do with nothing's open at six

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00:16:00.480 --> 00:16:04.440
in the morning. Yeah, it's
largely due to that. Yeah, we're

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in a broadcast of the one guy
Starbucks about to go run around the lake.

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Well, Kevin, Yeah, I
don't transition Dolphin's bills. What last

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night didn't go well for you,
Mikey, that sucks it for you.

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You know, I was thinking I
don't know if it's like maybe it's how

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Ranger fans felt until a couple months
ago. You know, it just feels

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like the good things never happen.
You know, the good thing never happens.

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Do you ever roll your eyes at
Cowboys fans too bitch about yeahing?

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It deput playoff run in because you're
looking at three straight twelve one seasons.

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And I guarantee if you if the
Cowboys lose to uh Green Bay, it

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is fire Mike McCarthy one week from
today. It should be. No,

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it shouldn't be. But but I
mean, I don't know if it should

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or shouldn't. But it's not definitive
one way or the other. Three straight

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twelve one seasons. They're not very
good multiple division championships. Dolphins haven't wont

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a division championships since eight oh and
that was an outlier. And you're also

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lucky there was a nineteen straight non
repeat NFC East champions Yeah, nineteen.

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And all I do as a fan
of that idiot team is watch the Patriots

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win it for about twenty years and
now the Bills win him five in a

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row or whatever it is. Garbage
man, it's the opposite of the NFC

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East, and I would much rather
be a division where yeah, sure it

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rotates and you win sometimes, so
yes, No, it's frustrating to be

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at home. And it's so cyclical
because this happened in what nineteen ninety two,

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when the Dolphins had home field advantage
of the playoffs and the Bills are

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coming to town. I'm like,
screw it, here we go. Let's

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whoop the Bills ass and make and
show, you know, exercise these demons.

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And they Kenneth Davis ran one hundred
screenplays, wasn't even Thurman Thomas,

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and they whipped us. And now
thirty years later, it's like, all

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right, Bills. The only saving
grace is that both teams will The Dolphins

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were locked in the playoffs. Before
the game, It's like, I don't

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know, you rather play Buffalo in
Miami or at KC. And I'm like,

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I think they're better. Dolphins are
a better team than Kansas City.

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I'm not sure we're a better team
than the Bills. So losing wasn't the

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end of the world, because you're
still in the damn playoffs. Do you

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have peacock? I do. That's
good because we're exclusive on peacock Saturday Night

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that's wild, the Dolphins at the
Chiefs and Outside exclusive exclusively on Peacock only

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on I think if you're in Kansas
City or Miami, I think you get

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regional. You've got to be kidding
me, but yeah, for us,

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this is the first playoff game that's
ever not been on widespread Yeah, easily

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available TV. You gotta download the
damn app. You gotta pay for it,

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but you're gonna free trial it or
whatever. Now. They tried to

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warm me up for this two weeks
ago and they did Bills and Arger's Saturday

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Night Peacock Exclusive. They're promoting the
crap out of it. It's genius.

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00:19:06.839 --> 00:19:10.359
It's genius by a business and what
a play You really want to watch the

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NFL playoff game? The only thing
people watch live? As we saw,

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like, go get the Peacock app, which I have because you know what,

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I like a lot of things that
I can see on there. I

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watched the very first episode of Saturday
Night Live last week from nineteen seventy five,

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George Carlin, Billy Preston. Probably
not you know, not really,

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you know, but it's very it
was cool to see just to look at

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how it all worked. Out.
I'm split on this because I, on

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some surface level, think it's crazy
that there's a NFL playoff game that you

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can't easily watch. But for all
the NFL's done for me and us,

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and if it is five bucks whatever, like, would you just hand someone

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five dollars so I can watch this
for the next three hours? For sure

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I would pay five dollars to watch
the Dolphins and Chiefs playoff game, right,

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just that. Yeah, that's exactly
kind of what I mean. One

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game for sure. You told me
I get all of parks and rec with

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it. Great, you get poker
face too, No, I got that

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many. Now I wonder how the
politics of how that not not the decision

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to air that game on Peacock,
but how it all shook out on who

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gets what games, because I was
assuming Peacock would get the crap game of

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the weekend, which would be the
what Texans? And who are they playing?

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Texans? Browns? They lot Texans
like, you know, you're the

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new guy, Yeah, ten year
seniority, you know, pecking order,

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you're getting whatever the worst. Fine, we'll give you a game, but

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you're getting the worst one. But
not I mean Dolphins Chiefs? Is I

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mean, how Tata is going to
be there. That is like, it's

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a it's a no joke. I
could ever judge how the Dolphins are viewed.

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But I mean it's a Chiefs home
game in Arawhead. That automatically makes

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it not the worst game of the
weekend. I really am surprised. I

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had no idea until today. Yeah, because like NBA will do that in

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the playoffs. Baseball does it where
you. The difference is, though,

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the networks that they typically show those
games on are like USA TBS, ESPN,

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NBA TV, those channels, Yeah, T and T there you go.

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But those channels are usually part of
an expanded cable package or a basic

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cable package that you get when you
go with I say, the more traditional

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streaming platforms like Hulu Live and YouTube
TV. This is a standalone app,

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yeah, that you have to download
onto your smart TV sub sign in with

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an email and a credit card,
and subscribe to it just to watch a

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football game, like Amazon what you
would have to do for Thursday night football

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all year long. So yeah,
that's that's true. But that's a huge

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difference between a Thursday night football game
and an NFL playoff game. How is

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the League reconciled with this. They
cannot be happy about not having their product

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a little more widespread. But it's
NBC, So it's NBC throwing their elbows

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out a little bit. I think
it's one small step for the direction the

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NFL wants to go. Is what
not user friendly? Well it's nothing.

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That's kind of what makes the NFL
great. We talked about this last week

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is that their games, regardless of
where they occur, they're not regionalized to

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some specific network that makes them unavailable
in other markets. Well, I mean

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it's weird to me though, because
like you would think Dolphins Chiefs is the

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headliner AFC game, That's what you
would want. And so I don't know

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if they the networks rotate in their
bidding. Obviously Fox gets the NFC,

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CBSABC, We've known this forever.
But the Cowboys is what anyone would want.

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So if you're NBC, you'd probably
be going, I want if I

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get the first pick, I want
Packers Cowboys on Saturday night on Peacock and

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we said, well we get in
at the Fox. It's funny as a

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Monday night game on Super wild Card
weekend, they do the Monday night game

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too. Now they're two three one
dumb, but they do it. I

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remember last year Joe and Troy doing
Eagles and Bucks round one of the playoffs

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two years ago, and I remember
Troy bitching about that game, and I

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was like, all right, well, it'll be way better for you on

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Monday night football. And there they
go, they have the Eagles and Bucks

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on Monday Night. I mean,
Troe was just like, ah, this

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is terrible football, you know,
And he was mad because he didn't get

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a Cowboys game probably or a good
game. So if we were getting the

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worst game on Monday night? Was
that the game also where there was like

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00:23:44.720 --> 00:23:49.039
a giant tray of fajidas next to
him that they what was that that they

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00:23:49.039 --> 00:23:52.759
were trying to eat a meatball?
It was a meet beat ball. Yeah,

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00:23:52.880 --> 00:23:57.559
the meat balls are over here getting
cold. They gotta do something about

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00:23:57.599 --> 00:24:02.920
this officiating. The gaves are going
on too long, and Joe calls him

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out for having food. It's just
getting cold in front of him. I

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don't know, it's uh, it's
gonna be Brown's. Texans is the Deshaun

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Watson Massage Bowl. You got the
Peacock game, which is great. Dolphins

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00:24:17.519 --> 00:24:22.400
Chiefs zero degree kickoff Saturday night.
Yeah, that's great, I mean not

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great for your team the way they
like to play, right, Yeah,

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because every single player on the Dolphins
team was just born and raised in Aruba.

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They're just used to hundred degree tempts
in humidity. I think that's weird.

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Yeah, I mean he's warm boy. Steelers at Steelers, Bills at

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noon Sunday, pack Cowboys three point
thirty Sunday, Iconic Rams, Lions Sunday

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00:24:53.200 --> 00:24:57.839
night the golf and Stafford Bowl.
That's pretty juicy, although very juicy,

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00:24:59.400 --> 00:25:03.400
you know, or the Cowboys Packers
would be the first draft pick. Yeah,

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if you were all the networks,
and do you think Sunday night is

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the most premier spot? It is
now, it has been for fifteen years,

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but for Super wild Card weekend,
which I think now it's that midday

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yeah, because they usually rotate whether
it's the whether it's the Fox game or

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the CBS game is the big one. It was last year, but it

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was like, I'm hype for this, but it just seems so spare Eagles

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Bucks is like the Monday night.
Yeah, like, all right, I

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won't be excited, I'll watch it, won't be hype for that a few

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games, they are kind of all
right, let's get through this whatever.

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Yeah, now I'm with you,
but okay, we'll have more on this

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all throughout the day because a lot
of stuff to talk about when it comes

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to your cowboys. They won in
Washington yesterday, but another team won last

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00:25:56.119 --> 00:25:57.720
night as well, and it might
have all been covered up by all of

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the football happening. Us a special
gift if you worked here next time.

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Ninety seven won the free