Content warning. This episode of on Schedule contains gunshot sounds which may frighten some
passengers. Oh man, my boys shorted a number on you. I was
honestly hoping you'd be dead. Suppose you're the some bitch that sent those kids
in here, dragon crowbars and the god almighty sledgehammers, wasting good sturdy tools
on a job you could finish with one bullet. I got crowbars to wipe
my ass with. Now, ammo, that is a lot harder to come
by. Boss can't trust those E ranks to shoot straight, so they got
me as their B rank shop aarone just in case B rank huh couldn't cut
it for a rank. Then you can't even hold the damn gun? Still,
what are you? Eighteen nine team, I'm turning twenty five. Goddamn
stupid boomer Drop something, kid, don't laugh at me, you fucking queer.
Boss says I'm in charge, and I'm gonna pop you between the fucking
eyeballs if you don't tell me where you're keeping your food. You're soft.
You think you can hide behind your boss and that gun and those kids you
sent in first, But you who can? You got more backup? For
when you shoot your own kneecap off. Kid, you don't want to push
me right now. I could make this real fucking bad for you. All
I need is the house and the food. Everything else is up to me.
Now, listen, you ain't never taking my home. That sounds like
a threat, dumb son of a bitch wasting bullets. I'm getting tired of
this game. You've officially been declared dead by the Burkholder Empire, and it'll
be my honor to do it. Episode six, Stump in the Woods.
All right, girls, Archie and Elliot are coming with me to check out
this station. We've been running pretty well on food and we're gonna need all
the hands we've got. Do you remember the rules we talked about. No
getting off the train without Archie, Sadie or Elliot presence, and buildings are
off limits until the grown up state it's safe yea, which means we're not
allowed to help carry stuff and the grown ups have to do everything. I
can put stuff away in the kitchen when you're back, watch out, Mara.
Sadie hates and the organization system that's not hers. No, I hate
your organizational system. You just truck shit wherever. Ask me where anything is
in the pantry and I could find it Like that a child could understand it.
I think a child might do better. Actually, Kat's really taken a
liking to you, Maura. She's such a sweet little lady. Watch hey,
Kat, kitchen trash, kitchen trash. Come on, Oh, you're
such a good little baby. Who's a cute little kitchen trash? Whoa she
can turn into the kitchen trash canbo. I've been teaching her how now she
can do bathroom, kitchen and dining room trash cans. I don't know how
to get her to change back, though. She just kind of does that
on her own. That's more progress than any of us have made by a
long shot. You're really good at Oh thank you, Paige. Could you
run back to Claire's room and tell her we're headed out? Nope, seriously,
whatever, you're not my dad, Maura. Could you tell Claire?
Okay, Kat's probably not going to change back for a bit anyway. I
think she goes to sleep like this. This place better have something left in
it. I haven't had anything but freeze dried cauliflower for like three straight days.
I need something fatty or I'm gonna keel over on top of Archie and
I might just crush him. All right, you are that much solider than
me. I'm twice as dense though. See. Okay, I hope you
guys are this energetic while we're looking for food. There's a good chance where
nowhere you are the first people to dig through this place. Yes, survival
Master Sadie, we will work diligently and without rest, for we are all
perfect scavenger robots like yourself. Hey, if you're going to choose to be
a direction list ball of chaos, I'm going to direct you. It's what
I do best. Let's get going. I'm sick of cauliflower too. I
just bitch about it less. Hey, I came from farm fresh eggs and
bacon every morning before I got here. Rowing boys gotta have an appetite,
declare. If I come out of her room this morning, I don't know.
I'll go tell her what Sadie said. Can you get me some orange
juice on your way back? Please? We ran out this morning. I
take it all back. This way sucks. Those three are going to find
more food. That's why they get out at all the stations. Well,
they're bad at it. They haven't brought anything back and forever. We'll figure
something out. I promise I'll look around the pantry and see if there's any
other juice. Okay, thanks, Maura. At least you actually care.
What are friends for? Claire? Is everything okay? In there? Get
online? Three Junior Scout leader Claire? This assistant Junior navigator, Mara.
I know it's you, Maura. You don't have to read off your title
every time. How else can we prevent identity theft over? You don't need
to over either. I can hear you through the door. Look, you
can't come in. Just leave me alone for the next two hours or so.
I'm busy. You told us we need to stay on our radios at
all times. You made that rule. Remember what are you so busy with?
Anyway? Can I help? No? I need to go by myself.
Go where nowhere? I mean, I'm organizing stuff. I just want
to be alone. Claire, you are going to follow them, weren't you?
Don't tell Paige please, she can't know. Sadie told us not to
get off until they know the area is safe. They're trying to help us,
Well, I don't think they can help us we need to be ready
for anything, and that includes leaving, which we will be doing eventually.
I'll track the adults to see where they forage for supplies, and then I'll
add some things just for us. I'll climb back through my window, snash
what I found under my bed, and we'll be ready, ready for what.
Larry, why is it fair they share everything they have with us,
but you're going to steal a bunch of stuff and not tell them about it.
I'm not going to argue this with you. It doesn't have anything to
do with them. The last time we pulled resources and relied on other people,
things went horribly. I won't let that happen again. I can't just
call me when you're alone, so I know you're okay, and you're not
going to tell Paige. You know I hate lying. It's not lying.
Just don't talk about it. I bet she's just moping around making up problems
anyway, Like always, I'll keep you updated, Mar We'll be safe soon,
I promise. I feel safe now. That's the fourth station in a
row that was completely empty, even the trash cans. We couldn't rely on
rooting for statious forever. Yeah, but I didn't think it would be this
bad already. It certainly doesn't help that we doubled the number of mouths to
feed. It's not their fault. Well, yeah, it's our fault.
That's what happens when you rash resources for three people and it becomes six overnight.
That's to say nothing about the bottomless pit the conductor dumps his beans into.
So we'll make it work. Those girls managed to survive just as long
as us with even less, which means we just need to look harder.
What are we looking for exactly? Any of the plants in this book?
Page said it was her foraging journal. It's got a bunch of pictures of
plants native to this area, and there's notes on each plant too. But
I swear this girl writes in hieroglyphics half of the time. Look at this.
There's even a root rec forgrading someone's cuteness and datability. Now there's a
survival essential. Now is not the time to screw around. We only have
like an hour of daylight left, and I don't want to go back empty
handed again. Fine, fine, but this will be costing you some datability
points. I wish she was food over datability. Every time. I understand
the grown ups have to know where they're going, right, I know we
were going this far. I would have brought a flashlight down. Oh more
violets. At least get a little extra nutrition with these a raspberry bush jack
pots. I'm so much better at this by myself. Wait this, this
soil was tilled at some point, mar I found something. I think,
who is this again? Over Junior Scout Master Claire reporting, I think I
found an old garden plot about fifteen minutes east of the train. It looks
overgrown and it's full of weeds. Over Junior Assistant Navigator Mara. Someone might
have been there recently. Be careful over, Roger. It's hard to see,
but I think there's an old cabin, maybe a hundred feet deeper into
the woods. It's off the path that Sadie and company are taking, Roger,
and you're gonna go inside. Over it's probably a hunting cabin or something.
Nobody's here right now, Geez, someone living out here. They had
to have left some stuff behind, and Sadie and those guys haven't seen it
yet. Maura, this is perfect. I'll have my pick of the food
stash. I am approaching the back of the cabin. Now, the part
that's closest to the tree line. I see a set of cellar doors that
I'm gonna try to No, no, that's too heavy. There's a window
right next to the doors. I should be able to handle that. Oh
geez, oh geez. What over? The window is pretty high off the
cellar floor, maybe six feet. Just gotta jump down easy. Do you
anything down there over? Oh? Yeah, I do. These are super
nice pickling jars playing cards. I wonder if it has all fifty two?
Oh my gosh, this is so cool. Clear looking for food? Over
right? Right? I think I hear a freezer. There's a couple of
boxes stacked on top of the lid. Let me just clear this off.
Over All I need is the house and the food. Everything else is up
to me. Shoot. Never is that Elliott in? That sounds like a
threat. Oh my god, Oh my god, was that a gun?
Mar I'm backing out. I'm gonna climb back through the window. I can't
understand you say freaking out. I can't reach the window from in here,
and there's someone upstairs. They have a gun. I can't understand what you're
I need to get out of here. Right now. I'll just climb the
stairs and run for it. Oh my god, see you in? Hello
man, Claire, Claire, can you hear me? Are you okay?
Please respond? Good God? Are you keeping kids in the basement? Now?
That ain't right? Come on out, little girl. I ain't gonna
hurt you. Don't you worry this rottin Old Ferry got you locked up down
there, don't he My boss has a comfy bed all for you. Come
on out now, little girl. That was a gun shot. There was
a gun in that building, and someone is firing that gun. We have
to get out of here. I can see someone through the window. If
we moved, they might see us. What the hell are we supposed to
do? It can't be safer than just Sadie. I'm sorry, but fuck
this. You ain't too close to this right now? I know that voice.
What that was? Claire? What You're sure? No? But it
was a kid? Elliott, Do not just run in. We need to
think this, Ellie. God damn it. What the eyes closed? Kid?
Ellie? Oh my god, are you okay? Are you hurt?
What happened? I didn't know when I came in. I'm I'm so sorry.
I didn't know anyone was here, a little missie, be glad that
man had my attention. I nearly shot you for breaking into my home,
So I just want to make sure you know what you're signing up for here.
What did you say your name was? I didn't, So what is
it? Stump? Stump? Yeah, like the part of the tree stuck
in the ground. Okay, well, Stump, I just want you to
know I was a veterinary technician, so you know I can handle any procedures
that overlap with the needs of zoo animals. But I'm not a real doctor.
I'm not even a real animal doctor. I can't promise I entirely know
what I'm doing, because now more than ever, I feel like I really
don't well, seeing as how I'll likely be dying soon without your help.
I'll take the sword to doctor over, no doctor at all, Okay,
I'll start taking a look at your wounds. Then I'm very sorry for how
this is gonna sound, but just so I know what's it like? Expect
you mean, like, am I a sir or a man? Yeah?
I didn't want to assume before I started looking you over. Ain't that funny?
My word? Can't you even remember the last time someone talked about me
in such a respectful way. Let's see now he stump, she stump,
they're stump, it's stump. It don't much matter. Just get these bullets
out of me. They're starting to hurt, all right, getting started now,
you said it so many times. It's just a weird sound. Now,
stump stump, stump, stump, stump. Ain't it funny? Sharon
language, I'm feeling lad is a cloud chatting with you, folks. That's
the morphine kicking in. Only about five milligrams. We don't have much of
spare. Feels like the kiss of an angel compared to a moment ago.
Hell of a drug you got there, Yeah, speaking of a moment ago.
Stump. I've got some questions. I've got a fee for you too,
Claire, so don't go anywhere. Yes, ma'am, suppose I've got
a number of my own as well. Then let's help each other out,
because we just walked in on a bloodbath. Five men were dead inside your
house, every one of them shot through the head. You shoot the killer,
You don't waste the bullet. Maybe find something to bite down on.
Stump. This is going to hurt, won't be necessary. Yeah, I
killed yea four of them earlier. Today. They roughed me up after they
broke into my sitting room. I took care of it. Yeah, I
passed out a while from the pain. Then his asshole comes running in with
a gun in his hand. So what were they doing at your house?
We haven't seen almost anyone down the whole East coast, and suddenly there's a
gang assaulting a hut in the middle of the woods. Well, it's a
homestead, it ain't no hut. I've been getting unwanted visitors my whole life.
I know how to keep them out. These fellas were real squeamish about
the pistol when I showed it to him, so they stayed away for a
while. This time, though, they just busted the door down, screaming
at me. You mean these guys have tried to break into your house before
them or someone similar, They was wearing fancy black and white suits, just
like these ones were. No way, that's a coincidence. What in Christ's
name were a bunch of wannabe mobsters doing way out here in the woods multiple
times? That doesn't that doesn't make any sense. Stranger shootout. I've ever
had in my life. Tell you what the head asshole was sniffing out my
food in store and talking about the Burkholder Empire or some nonsense. Burkholder one
nine meat bullet removed from left cash. Thank you doctor, Oh my goodness,
thank you. All right, looks like it's my turn to talk.
It's peculiar having this gang of business folk trying to break into my home shirt
but to have a child and then y'all bursting in, Well, peculiar don't
even cover it. And it don't even begin to explain the locomotive. Y'all
have what's your angle exactly? We aren't in any gangs, and we don't
want to rough you up. We're kind of just the guests of a man
who thinks he's both a child and a train conductor at the same time.
You mean like he's two people. I guess he thinks he's two people.
I have no idea, but we wound up finding your shrack after there was
nothing left to scavenge in town. H Stavenger's a well, it's like you
guessed you ain't nowhere near the first people to stoop around for food. Bunch
of push carts are going up and down the tracks all the time now,
dragging anything not nailed down away with them. Only food left around here is
what's growing in the woods and what's growing in my garden. It ain't much,
but I'll offer it. Cauliflower's been cropping up nicely. She said it,
Paige. I told her to stay in your room. You're not my
dad. Oh, I'm really sorry, Sadie. I tried to get her
to listen. I just wanted to know. Claire was okay, I'm fine,
Maura. Can we just get this over with so I can go.
Oh, you want to get to the ship that you pulled? Okay?
You ignored everything I said and you almost got killed because of it. Sorry.
Oh great. Hopefully that half ass sorry can deflect bullets in the future.
Claire, I thought you were a leader. What kind of example is
this. It's not an example. They aren't supposed to do stuff like this.
That's why I have to That's why we have to the adults, the
big people that have been alive twice as long as you. I know you're
smart, but this was incredibly selfish of you. One nine millimeter bullet removed
from must soul of right arm. I'm trying to be a good leader,
you need to try harder. I know, Larry, she was expressing tears.
It's those kinds of observations that make you a strong leader. It's not
a duty I cherish, but someone must be at the controls. The help
has informed me that we have a new passenger. Mister Muller, please address
all questions to Elliott or Sadie. Sir, A bitch, I'll handle this
one, mister conductor m Stump Elliott pleasure. Ah okay, well, I
can't be certain. You know how trains work, but it's the only thing
that hasn't changed since the apocalypse. The what now? Oh wow, Well
we'll get back to that, I guess. For starters. Since you're on
the Advent Nomad, you need to give this lanky boy here a ticket.
He's the conductor and he will accept literally anything you call a ticket. Tradition
is important. Times may be changing, but the Advent Nomad presses on indefatigable
in its mission to transport its passengers in a safe and timely manner to their
destination anywhere in the continental United States. All right, then here's my ticket,
mister conductor. Sir, mister Archie, here just pulled it out.
Your patron is just so super duperly appreciated. I'll get right on setting up
your sleeping arrangements. But before that, I must ask a rather embarrassing question.
Due to a recent downed bridge repair, we have run dry unusable lumber.
I'm afraid I lack both the proper tools and the time to mill any
trees myself. Are you aware of any stockpiles of lumber in the area.
Well, just what I got back at the homestead. It's rough hewn,
ran out of sand paper. Are you saying I can have it the wood
and the shack I would like to use its lumber? Sure, tear it
down, I say, God damn bark. Older men are going to swarm
the place like ants on a roopy or barrel. Otherwise I meant it when
I told them they ain't never taken my home and exchange though I'd like an
empty train car to do what I like with top to bottom very well,
so long as it is used for the betterment of the advent. Now I
got a shack to go tear down. Hope you enjoy your stay. Huh
strange fellow. Oh, since all that's out of the way, Oh boy,
I'm not gonna bullshit you stuff. This looks bad. The third bullet
sladged in your rip cage. There's no way I can remove it without breaking
a bone. And honestly, I don't understand how your rip cages in one
piece. The bullets close to your heart, and lead poisoning is extremely likely.
Mhmm. Missed my heart though I've always been lucky like that, I
guess. But lead poison, Well, I want to have long then can
I get some damn windows open in air? I need to think? Okay
it okay, just thirteen more thinks? All right, um, excuse me.
Just don't formalities or for funerals. Oh okay, Well, I've brought
you some dinner and a little pain medicine. I don't know if it's any
good. It's been in my backpack for like two years, so I don't
got any money on me. Oh, I wasn't going to sell it to
you. You can just have it. Oh well, then that's real nice.
Do you do you want some help with that? I'm not trying to
get anything from you, I promise no. I believe you. Well,
could you pin this or down? Somehow? It keeps rolling up? On
me. Sure, what are you writing? Gotta put down the dimensions of
that car that conductor's letting me use? Oh are you designing a greenhouse?
Well, ain't you sharp? We're gonna need more food around here, I
bet, And it's better to make what you need than take it. Is
that what you did back at your house in the woods. Sure never had
to do it on a train, though, But life's full of firsts.
If you want, I could try to help you draw it out. Oh
yeah, hm, I like to draw. Pagoey's has me do the pictures
in her foraging journal. And this way, anyone helping you build it,
we'll know how you want it to look. Well by all means there,
Picasso, take the reins, still greenhouse. I'll just start with the outline,
then you can tell me about the inside. Okay, gives me time
to start eating. So something going on with you and your buddies. I
don't know what. No, an artist, but not an actress. Huh
do you want to try that again? Come on now? Not often someone
your age would rather spend time with a crusty old so and so over her
friends. Claire doesn't want to talk to me right now. Maybe not at
all anymore. She told you that she didn't have to. I'm sure she's
shocked. This ain't something little girls should be dealing with. She'll be feeling
better soon. I wish you were right. It used to be four of
us once. Yeah. Yeah, our friend Isabelle. She she died a
few months ago before we found the train. My goodness, Back when we
were all together, it was like it was always fun, even when it
wasn't. You know. We'd all talk in this dumb voice that Page always
hated, especially when we did it at school, but she would always wind
up doing it too, And Claire gets all awkward about hugs, so we
just started doing group hugs so she wouldn't be embarrassed about liking them. But
ever since what happened with Izzie, it's like the rules changed. What rules,
I don't know. Page is always mad, even though I try to
help her like all the time, and then Larry's the complete opposite. She
refuses to let me help her with anything or even talk to me unless I
basically force her. I'm just not good at this, not good at what
making them happy. Look, now, it ain't your job to fix other
people's problems. They got to do that themselves. But is he always knew
how to help them through stuff like this? Respectfully, there is no stuff
like this that compares to losing somebody. Believe me. I know that.
I guess you're right. I just I missed when they used to get along.
I missed the buddy voice and the hugs. I've missed my friends.
It's a mean life, dear. Y'all are learning hard lessons. You're too
young to be losing somebody. Does it get easier when you're older? Is
that how you could kill those people? Young lady? They stormed into my
home. They looked me dead in the eye and said it was theirs,
and they beat me bloody on my living room carpet. They got a mercy
compared to what they deserved. I don't want to hurt anybody. You got
a good heart, Mara, but you need to look out for yourself too.
I know I got the outline finished up. Well, heck, that
was quick. Let's see what we Yeah, Hello, mister Burkholder, it's
roxy. The situation with the new compound has hello, sir. The site
from the new Georgia Barracks has Hello. Speak up? Is someone there,
sir? For fuck's sake, the squadron ecent is dead. Oh, come
on, a rank, it was just a joke. I could hear you
the whole time, silly girl. Besides, they were just e ranks.
Just remind that new b rank boy to get in touch with me once he
clears out the bodies and you focus on your own mission. He hasn't checked
in since last night. Excuse me. I wanted to see what was going
on at the shack earlier this morning, and by the time I got there,
the whole place was torn apart. There was this guy just hauling pieces
of it towards the garden. The fucking food just disappeared overnight. All that
work scouting this place and it just walks away. Tell me this, tell
me this. Are you a complete waste of my charity, a rank,
or do you have some good news? There's something else, sir. I
saw the guy hauling the pieces back down the mountain toward the train station.
The train station. More scavengers on my railway. Jesus, they're like termites.
How are they like termites? Oh? Come on, if you see
one, there's bound to be a thousand more just behind the wall. Of
course, I've never heard that one before. But dude, I mean,
sir, there's something else. There's a gaudy ass train sitting at the station.
Are felon on the run, So you finally caught up to it.
I told you you would. Yeah, it was a good guess. The
train would follow the tracks. So can I go for it? These highwaymen
are going to think that this land is all theirs if we don't do something
about them. We are well within our rights under Burkholder law to eradicate them
and claim their trade. Oh this is going to be so fucking easy.
Get ready to mobilize. Thank you for listening to this episode of on Schedule.
This show is created and produced by Kyle Goss and Caroline Byrne, with
associate production by Victoria Pereira. This episode was written by Kyle Goss and Caroline
Byrne. In this episode, you heard the Conductor and the Help voiced by
Kyle Goss, Archie Muller voiced by Christopher Medina, Sadie Laskins voiced by Kiera
Frost, Elliot Denver voiced by Connor, Riley Claire Kelly voiced by Caroline Byrne.
Mara Perez voiced by Victoria Pereira. Paige Lindbergh voiced by Sarah Carper,
Stump Burrows voiced by Ian Rubin, b Rank voice by Christian Woodward, Roxie
Malloy voiced by Angelique Geronimo and Bertram Burkholder, the third voice by Alex Scully
folly In. Sound design was done by Kyle Goss and Caroline Byrne. Audio
editing was done by Caroline Byrne. Our. Theme music is Hands composed by
Christina Jane George and performed by Christina Jane George and Anthony Saddik. This episode
also features Jonathan's coat by Christina Jane George and passage by White Sand. You
can find Christina's compositions on her SoundCloud and White Sand's works on their YouTube channel.
Be sure to subscribe to on Schedule so you don't miss any of the
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Attention, passengers, we will be departing the station shortly. Please take
your seats, stow your luggage, and try not to think about that movement
you saw in the bushes. We'd hate to spoil Roxy's surprise in episode seven,
The berkeholder Men