Hope for Today's show with your host Louise Boobron Macaluso. Hi, everyone,
Welcome to Hope for Today. Welcome, Welcome. It's like, uh,
today is Willie awesome as usual? I have some amazing guests with me.
Um to my left is miss none other than my lady Cruz. Hi,
guys, I am so blessed and honored to to kind of be here with
you and sharing this space and your show. I love to join your show
all the time that I can. Oh my goodness, it's always fun.
And more importantly, I feel that your show, like the title Hope for
Today, brings a lot of hope for people. So I'm just honored to
be a part of that. Oh my goodness, it's always so much fun.
Yes, it's like the topic today is just like just on point about
hope because I think we need that. But first, in the four of
us, we want to introduce. Our second guest is Crystal Wallace High.
Crystal, thank you so much again for having me. Yeah, so,
you know, I didn't want to let you go. I was like,
you know what, let's do a panel and talk about this topic that is
so important, And the topic is about fixing the divisive atmosphere that we are
we've been having for the past I don't know when, and it feels like
it's been amplifying. Yes, I think after covid Um things got a lot
more amplified, that divisiveness, that that kind of I don't know that atmosphere
and energy of we have more than two sides here, right, um.
And I think that politics haven't helped, you know, it's kind of contribute
to us feeling more divided. There's a lot there's a lot of arms to
this topic. Yes, and it's so important. It's so good that you
mention politics because I think like that that is like one of the main factors
that have started it then, especially in the recent years, where families have
like you know, become a stringed as a result of politics because of different
views, which is really sad, right, it is really sad and unfortunately,
um, you know, And keeping with that, it's like there used
to be a time when you can disagree politically. First of all, we
didn't even talk about politics in this country for a while. I was like,
you know, you don't know who's what, and but now it's like,
oh, well what are you? Which side are you? And then
you know, um and then actually have that some sort of discrimination because of
which side of the poll you're on. Yeah. Yeah, there's a very
heavy polarity that we're seeing right now, to the point where you see a
lot of people unfriending, you know, people that they have been knowing for
a very long time, just because they are this party or that party.
Right, this frame of mind or that frame of mind. When did we
get to the point where we can't have a conversation even if we have opposite
you know, mindset to frame of thinking. Yes, exactly, learn to
coexist and you know, just agree to disagree on certain things and there's nothing
wrong with that. Yes. And I know one of my friends who said
that like almost a childhood's friend. You know, they've known each other for
their almost their whole lives, and because of politics, the end of like
you know, they their friendship is broken. Now you no longer speak to
each other. It's communication, Okay, that's what I think. My thought
is, we have all these mediums for communicating, but we don't know how
to communicate. If I have a problem with you, I'm not going to
come to you and talk to you like an adult. I'm going to post
about it, right, and throw subliminal messages on social media rather than coming
to the person directly. What on earth? Like why it's immaturity right?
Exactly? The irony of social media, social right, social rights. It's
just something that has to be addressed because it's a trickled down to the younger,
like the kids, the teenagers, you know, and it's like,
you know, I mean, do we have to like take a minute,
you know, pause and just be Okay, something has to be done because
like we live, do we let that to fester? You know, where
are we gonna eat like ten years from them? Oh that's a great question,
and that brings about an even bigger question when you are looking at the
global kind of atmosphere that we have right now, where the United States is
a declining power and the China, for example, is increasing power. So
if we do not do something about the unity of the United States, let's
say, the world is going to suffer because the United States have always,
you know, for a very long time, not always, but for a
very long time been the power that has held a lot of the democratic ideas
right around the world, and it looked up to But if we have a
power like China take over, that's not going to be so democratic, right,
So we kind of need to wake up. It's more of the just
affecting us. It's a global issue, right, and the fact that we
cannot communicate the fact that even if we have very similar idea years and if
it varies, just to tap it. Oh, you are a Christian,
but you're you know whatever, Christian and I'm this Christian. I mean,
we're all humans at the end of the day. And the beauty of differences
and diversity is that it brings you different ways to solve problems, creative ways
to solve problems, right, Yeah, exactly. And you know that's a
good point because like we can learn from each other absolutely, you know.
And so if we like, uh, just choose to just state in our
little corners, oh, I'm just like dealing with like this group, you
know, because they have the same views as me, you know, the
same political views or you know, religious views. So I mean seriously,
we're just like, you know, closing up on a like all little world.
Yeah yeah, and it has to come from our religious leaders as well.
I mean we you know, in my opinion, you know a lot
of you know, the people who have the influence. You know, it's
not going to come from the politicians. Got to come from those religious leaders
to say, you know, hey, let's put this aside. You know,
at the end of the day, you know, it doesn't matter what
the person believes, whether they don't believe, whether they agree or disagree,
it has to be we have to be united, you know, and it
can't just be. It has to be on both sides, you know what
I'm saying. I can put that to the side. But at the end
of the day, it's because we know that what we believe shapes our behavior,
and I can't say anything differently, you know. And so it's like,
well, if you believe this, then you must do X, you
know, and you make these certain assumptions about folks because we know that what
you do or what you believe is, you know, directly connect so what
you be here, you know that, and so you must do this.
But that doesn't necessarily be I mean, that's the case. I might agree
with certain things that certain someone does, but I don't agree with everything,
right, yeah, exactly, you know, And that's something that I've noticed
that is just so uncomfortable to see where people in terms of like politics,
if you identify with like a group or you know, it's like you have
to like agree with everything that person, the leader of that group does.
Like that's like ridiculous. Like I mean, like I may identify as,
like, you know, with a group, but the leader of that group,
I'm not gonna agree with every single thing that person does, you know,
because like I'm not a chief, you know, like following you know,
in politics, that's even it is a big issue. I've been around
politics for for some time, not in but around politics, right, and
I know how it works. And unfortunately, for example, you identify yourself
as Democratic and you, for some reason are seen taking a picture with the
Republican. Oh that's like you trader, you know, And I think that's
a maturity. Like for um, That's why after some time, I don't
consider myself to be either Democrat or Republican. I'm a human when I'm when
I'm asking what, yeah, what's your party, I'm a human. Yeah,
yeah, I'm a human Because at the end of the day, there's
things to change in a and there's things to change and be right because that's
what they want you to They want you to pick a side It's like,
I don't have to pick a side, right you If you want to pick
a side, you can. I don't have to. But at the end
of the day, you know, it's with with politics and with these things
that we are discussing here, we have to understand that it's about humanity,
like yes, um is you know, about being good humans to each other,
you know, and it doesn't matter what side wrong. You know,
if you're in need, you're in need, absolutely. And what I believe
has also contributed to this kind of culture of you know, dividing and segregating
is the algorithms of these social media platforms because they show you only what you
like, only what you want to hear. Right when you click like on
something, that will show you everything that's related to that, everything that is
only about that. So all of a sudden, these kids, these young
generations, and not only kids, by the way, these older folks.
Everyone humanity is now okay, I I only want to see this. How
about the other side? Oh no, they're wrong. I'm right. First
of all, there's no such thing as complete right or wrong. I mean,
if you because yes, and I'm so glad you said that, I
would just say my glasses off because you were making such a good point.
I love that. You know, if you you don't want to idolize yeah
person, because that person is now an idol if you agree with every single
thing. There's no one in my life I agree, and I don't want
people don't agree one hundred percent with me either. You know. I like
when I that. I like, I don't enjoy it, but I like
when someone can tell me the truth and pull my coattail, you know,
not all the time, not disrespectfully, not rude or not in front of
people, but I like that when someone gets say that, Crystal, you
know, what you said was kind of messed up. What you did was
kind of messed up. If you can't say that about someone you support,
is that person an idol? Right? Right, That's a great point.
Just like when somebody can tell you playing point, like something that you did.
You know that you said, Crystal, It's like it helps you to
grow, you know how as a human. You know. And so the
fact that a lot of the times, like you just we've been seeing that
especially recently, where you know, a leader becomes like a faultless writing where
you know they could do like the most vile things, and then they would
be like and then people would defend them like death, and then they like
comparing I'm like, I don't even want to name any names. Or they
would compare an individual who did something like horrific, you know, very vile,
and then they comparing them to Jesus. I was like, how dare
I'm like, really, you have a lot of nerves to compare someone who
did something wrong. And then you're saying like you know, oh like they
just like, you know, you know, doing what they did to Jesus.
I mean, seriously, get a grip. Or they assume, they
make assumption that you support this person. Everyone supports this person because they are
x right. You know. It's like, you know, no, none
of its supposed the right, Like it could be another reason, but they
we don't want to learn why people, you know, support who they support.
We don't want to learn. All we want to do is stereotype them
and make assumptions and then run with that. Whatever assumptions we have in our
head, it's now a reality. Yeah, and then we roll with that,
and that is causing disunity as you're talking, yeah, and then like
you know, and that's motivated also by like you know their own like whatever
it is that their motives are, you know, whether you know their political
goals you know, so yeah, and they all have an agenda. And
then so it's like somebody has to be the the um the scape goals,
right, you know, and then it goes from there. Yeah, this
this cancel culture that we're also living in. Oh my god, yes,
don't get me started, right. You know, that's another thing when you
have a human being. For example, I know so many people that are
content creators that I personally follow that focus on creating motivational, inspirational, amazing
content. Right, But you have these other individuals that focus on creating content
that is important, but they're in the forefront of these these heart debates,
you know. And these are people that get the brunt of a lot of
rocks thrown at them because they're talking about difficult topics, right, Um,
and they say one thing, they have a whole recording of an hour they'd
separate one middle section. Yeah, take things out of content to crucify,
and they crucify. I'm like, are you serious? This person is going
to lose a hole? For example, Um, what's his name? Joe
Rogan He's an example that was gonna lose an entire um contract that he had
for millions of dollars. Yes, he did something wrong, he said the
N word, right, Yes, but look at the man's complete history,
right, look at the context of what he's doing. And yes, he
made a mistake, and he publicly you know, you know, like I
said, I'm sorry, but don't we all make mistakes? Yeah, And
I do believe that, like, just like Crystal said to if you,
if you're myself, for somebody to be able to say, yeah, that
was wrong, right, you'll russ the line. Right. I believe in,
like, you know, being able to just like, uh, resolve
things as opposed to just like cancel someone all absolutely, And it's all the
context in which and how you say and why you say things, and how
you utilize things. You can't completely take something out of context and change the
narrative. Right. That's happening a lot today where people say something and it's
taken out of context, you know, um, and we can't even feel
like we could express ourselves in a way that makes sense for us or whatever
it is, because it's going to be changed for something else or to you
know, the agreement of another party. So that's another issue with this,
you know, you know, with the society that we're living in that we
have to constantly be feel like we have to walk on eggshells, right,
Yeah, you know it's well, what I will say is, you know,
nicknames, to stay away from him. Absolutely. I don't know what
his reason was, motivation. I don't care, Sam. Absolutely, I'm
not absolutely to cancel soul, but I'm just saying to stay away from them.
This. You don't call anybody out the day, Yeah, absolutely,
you know, absolutely, you know I say, look, I don't know,
I'm not. All I'm saying is just stay away from him. Just
avoid him at all. Pause, right, and not even pillow talk.
Right, But if you want to do it, dude, in a couple
of your own pillow, but not in front of bolts, don't just don't
do it. Absolutely absolutely, And that's when you come across people that,
Okay, you made the mistake, you openly said, I apologize, I'm
sorry. You don't do it again, okay, right, right, we
all we can all kind of extend that benefit of the doubt. Right now.
If you do it again, that's a different story. But we need
to get into the culture of not crucifying people because they make one mistake.
That's my point behind that we need to start getting into the habit of you
need to look at your own kind of you know, dirt in your eye
before you start pointing, because those fingers are three of them are pointing back
at you. Yeah. Right, And that applies to like relationships as well,
you know, absolutely, it's not just like you know, in the
public setting, but in relationships, you know, because like people we love
sometimes they do stuff that are you know, hurtful that like you're like,
okay, I need a manner to digest that before I can even like,
you know, And that's why I said not even in pillow talk, stay
away from it, even in pillow talk, because what you do in private
is gonna spill over in public. I'm just thinking that what I mean,
I'm just thinking, like, you know, yeah, you're right, You're
you're absolutely right, for sure, you know, it should be eliminated,
you know completely. I'm just thinking, don't do it in public, right,
don't do it right, just right, way from it. As it
concerns nicknames, just stay away from it. It's offensive. And and that's
the thing too, especially you know when you can when you have words that
were used to belittle and yes, be great and hurt and any other vile
words, any evil thing you could think of, but the words was used
for that, just stay away from it, right, don't use it.
Just don't use it. You're gonna be And I think that's a lack of
knowledge, dude, Like you know, ignorance, because like if you go
into like you know, researching, you know where that word when it's like
the the the heavyweight that that word carries for you know, people of color,
you know, um, you would be like, oh no, there's
no way I could say that because like you know, the pain that came
with that word or for that community, you know, you you would be
respectful. And that's another thing to keep in mind. In order for you
to be in the space to create unity, you need to be mindful of
the things that are offensive for different cultures and different people. Definitely, right,
every culture, there's a word that is used unfortunately, for every single
culture. For Hispanics, they have a word for this, they have a
word for that, they have a word. You know, ignorant people,
right, ignorant people that create these these words that are degrading, right,
So we need to be mindful of that. We need to be mindful of
the of the language that we use when we communicate, so we can create
a culture of unity, definitely, because like you know, even um,
when I was doing my doctors, you know, they had us take a
course on multiculturalism where we learned that, like you know, and for fighting
therapy, certain things. Not everything means the same to every everybody, So
you have to learn about like each culture, you know, even like body
language because like certain cultures, you know, um, if you're talking to
them, they're not going to look at look at you in the eyes because
that's a sign of disrespect if they look at you in the eye. And
then like in the meantime here, you know, you have to look at
the first and in the eye when you're speaking with them, otherwise they think
you are lying, or you're being disrespectful or not things all right, you
know, you see those opposite right, mindset of the same thing of the
same. Actually, So in the order for us to be able to learn
to coexist, I think we need to learn about each other. Yeah,
we do need to learn about each other. We do need mindful of those
things. I do think that it's impossible to know every single thing that's a
principle to every single culture if you have so many. Um but I you
know, it's so there are some like I said, what we know for
sure, nicknames don't don't do it, don't even do it. Um But
the thing like I know, like even in my field being a realtor,
you know, I meant so many different people. And there are some cultures
that I know not to go up to the man to talk, right,
I know that he would much rather me talk to his wife. I know
in some cultures I know not to shake their hands, you know, and
they will remind me when they do like this, So I'll go to reach
and you know, and I'll you know, but I've learned that in certain
cultures I know what to do and when. Like it's talk about body language
for sure, you know, even as a simple greeting, you know,
I want to keep my hands on myself just hey, hey, how do
you talk? I give a very warm all day listen you hey. Yeah,
that's interesting. And and you're saying that what came to mind is also
not taking things so personal, yes, because some people would have felt offended
that they would have extended a hand and there was no other hand to greet,
right, So understanding that this means I'm greeting you, but because of
a certain belief I have, then you not taking that personal And it gave
me a moment of learning, you know where you're like, oh, you
know, I have to find out like if that culture, you know,
whether they're their customs, you know, they need not shake hands, and
you get to I just like I mean like google people, you know google
that. Um what So this this is a question for for both of you.
What do you guys think that needs to happen in order to open and
make the playing feel kind of nice and even and balance and more neutral.
Well, I mean I think, like, you know, the basis of
things, it's like us not seeing each other as equal that has created that
huge barrier. Yeah, and I think like we have to start there because
like if we were to come together as one, like little kids like they
don't see color, they would like just like you know, they any kids
like you know, they would play with them and like, oh my gosh.
The other day I saw a video and it cracked me up. Two
kids, they were like five, you know, one white one black and
then like, you know, the white one said, Mommy, I have
a twin. He looks exactly like me. Yes, it's like they don't
they It's a learned thing, racism and to learn behavior and so like,
if we were to be able to see things from my kids' perspective in that
sense where we don't see someone or measure them based on how they look,
you know, the color of their skin, their ethnicity, I think that
will be a huge step forward and achieving unity. Yeah, and I would
have started you of course, would start with the thought because you're it all
starts with the mind, all thought with the mind, how you perceive them.
I would even had gone there. I was like, you had to
communicate more, but yeah, the perception. Definitely, we have to communicate
more with each other. We have a let's see, we haven't learned how
to do that. And a lot of us haven't learned how to do that
because we weren't taught that at home. You know, we didn't learn to
talk about things. We yelled it out, you know, or you couldn't
talk about things. You better be quiet before I fell in the blank.
So we haven't learned to unlearn dysfunctional bad behavior. It has been so ingrained
in us, you know, where now it just comes out so where I'm
not gonna talk to Susie because she said something I didn't like. I'm not
gonna talk to her anymore. I'm just gonna avoid her for the rest of
my life, because that's the way that we do. We we avoid stuff,
you know, but rather you know, hey, what's a better way
for me to salvage a relationship? Oh and that's one other thing. That's
the other thing that we see so often on social media and it makes me
sick to my stomach when they talk about I see so many posts talking about,
you know, dismissing people. You know. Oh, you know,
this year, I'm peace and this and that and listen, I'm all for
peace, all for peace. There's some people that you just should not be,
you know, entangled with. However, have you tried to talk?
Did you come to the table right before? You're just a smiss people?
Right, just go on and talk, have a conversation, right, you
know, it might have been just a slight under misunderstanding. Absolutely, you
know that's that my you know, my thought initially would be too communicate better
and learn how to communicate, you know, don't hit below the belt.
You know, don't hit below the belt by saying certain things that you know
that would get a rise out of the person. Yeah, hey, that's
why you went to bed until you were thirteen? Like why would you say
that? And it just starts with the thought that's like, you know,
their perception of the person. Yeah, it gives them like, you know,
makes them feel like they have the right to do that. Absolutely,
And this hip was critical, I think too, because at the end of
the day, you know, if you are over here saying this person deserves,
let's say, to be counseled, that this person deserves to be you
know, completely segregated because of this or whatever it is, then how about
when you make a mistake when it's your turn, should we segregate you?
You're right, she should we stone you? Right? Right? So,
um, at the end of the day, we need to understand that we
are all humans. You know, we all have flaws, we all have
things that we need to work on, we all have things that we can
learn from each other. Nobody knows everything. You could be very skilled at
one particular area, but all the other areas are like, oh, you
need some album. So let's learn from each other's diversity and differences. Right,
Let's be open to have a conversation, even if I disagree with you,
that's the point. Let's have some curiosity. M I wonder, I
really disagree with what she's saying and how she views things, but I wonder
how she came about that that conclusion. Let me see, let me just
hop you know what I mean. You hit the nail on the head.
You hit the nail on the head. You you went from what to why?
And that isn't the thing that we don't do. We don't ask why,
you know, we know what? Why? Right? Why do you
think what you do? We don't take the time to take time. We
don't like that. Yeah, we don't do it. Yeah, that's really
real and it's just like something we definitely that conversation. We could go on
and on about it because it's just like so much um to say about it.
So I think we're gonna have like a part two part two. Guys,
we are just getting started, like because like we um we mentioned uh
like how we think and like you know, better communication, but we want
to go into details. How do we go about like you know, start
rethinking our old ways of thinking and start like you know, rethinking our ways,
our communication styles, reprogramming, right yeah yeah, and psychology we call
it cognitive reframing. Oh yeah, so that is something we definitely have to
continue that conversation, so we we we definitely will be back to continue that
conversation. Conversation. That's been fun, yes, isn't it. I mean
seriously, we could talk like all day, the three of us because like,
uh, I think the three of us week like so well yeah definitely,
yeah, So thank you so much ladies for being here, Thank you
for me, Thank you so much. Fun. I wish I could have
you guys every every Sunday. You know, it's like so much fun to
be able to discuss because like those are important topics that need to be um
addressed. Yeah, you know, ka is like we are going on a
time downward spiral and it starts with talking. Yeah. Absolutely, yes,
definitely, So thank you so much, Crystal, and thank you our lady.
See you guys next time for part two, Yes, part two two
man, guys, and I'm yeah, how's doctor Louise Bobron Macaluso. We'll
see you next time. Bye, Hope for today's show with your host Louise Boobron Macaluso