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Once in a while on the radio, I'll come up with an idea and

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then it comes time to do it, and I'm like, oh god.

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I think one of the worst was
fifteen, probably close to twenty years ago.

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I decided to broadcast from the Toys
r Us down in Bloomington on a

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lift, like an outdoor construction lift, and I set up a tent up

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there and I would broadcast from there
all day. Every day. I lived

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up there. I slept in a
tent, and I remember I got there

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on a Monday morning and I was
gonna be there until Friday afternoon, raising

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toys for Toys for tot So it
was around this time of the year and

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it was cold, but you know, I'm a camper and I know how

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to be like outdoors and stay warm
and whatever, so I was fine.

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It was just long and boring,
and I remember that Monday morning going,

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what have you done? You're gonna
be here all week on this fucking scissors

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lift and you're gonna be broadcasting live. Big of a mistake was this?

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Did you so you had to do
it till Friday? Yeah, That's what

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I decided to do, and I'd
be like, bring by your toys,

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and I remember I was right across
from the Best By corporate office and they

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hung a big sign in their window
that said go Dave or something like that,

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which was cool and people would honk
as they drove by. But it

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was just the long thing that I
decided that was nutted. Was I didn't

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like it? Well, yeah,
and like, I know you said that

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you camp and whatever, but it's
still like not fun to be outside in

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the cold. And were you able
to get off a lift and go like

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enjoy your day in machine? Okay? God, yeah, I had to

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go to the bathroom and I could
walk inside of Toys r Us and you

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know whatever, and you know,
people would come by, so I didn't

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have to stay on the lift the
entire time. But that was one.

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There was another one where and I've
done this several times. When I was

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twenty two, I lived in Las
Vegas, and I decided to raise money

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for some charity by sitting in every
single seat at the Thomas and Mack Center,

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which is basically their version of the
Excel Energy Center. It's still there,

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and I sat in every single seat
while I was twenty one or twenty

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two. Wasn't that hard then?
I did it when I lived in Columbus.

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I sat in every seat at the
Ohio State Stadium, the Horseshoe.

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Huh. And that's like one hundred
thousand seats. That was a bad idea.

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That took a week. I was
going to say, was it a

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matter of you getting up and then
moving immediately to the next seat and then

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keep going. Yeah, his knees
up and down, and then you would

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bang your hips on the side of
the arm rest as you did it,

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so you had to give it up
enough you couldn't just slide over. Then

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I did it in Arizona, and
then I did it here at the Excel

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Energy Center. And by the time
I did it here, I was like,

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way too old to do that.
I was probably like, I don't

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know, thirty five or something,
and was like, this is a terrible

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idea. A friend of mine who
was pretty heavy, he called me a

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couple of years ago and he's like, hey, I'm thinking about doing your

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sit in the seat marathon. And
he lived in Indianapolis, and I said,

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Okay, yeah, do it,
but before you commit to doing it,

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go down to the stadium, have
him let you in and do a

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couple of sections to see what it
feels like, because you might be surprised

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at how fucking exhausting it is.
And so he did, and he called

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me back later that day or next
day or whatever, and he said,

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I am so glad I talked to
you because I had no idea how hard

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that was, and I am not
going to do it. Yeah. So

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the reason I bring it up is
because I'm doing the whale joke later on

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today. Yes, the whale jokethon
and it sounds like fun, but an

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hour of telling the whale joke could
be a lot. I think it'll be

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a lot. You've been drinking some
coffee this morning, so that's probably good.

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Like the heat on your throat,
I feel like you should probably sit

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on some tea from the kitchen up
over here. Yeah, I sit on

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some tea beforehand, just because I
think that, Like, I don't know,

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I'm speaking from perspective of I just
hosted a game at the Timberwolves and

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my voice was hurting from like screaming
on the microphone. And I only screamed

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every like five minutes. It wasn't
like a consistent and hour of going.

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And so I'm concerned, not that
you can not do it, but that

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your throat is going to start to
hurt to the point where you get like

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coffee, and like you your coffee
and you can keep going. We'll have

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some water. The hot tea is
a good idea. The good news with

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the whale joke is I can take
long pauses. I can be like so

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I can take long pauses in there, but I might regret doing it.

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But we're raising money for Christmas wish. I hope you'll come through. By

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the time you hear this, the
whale joke on will probably be over because

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we're recording right now. Before the
whale joke, all right, let us

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move on to this is somebody requested
this. I think they requested Jenny's Christmas

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song? Is that the story?
They did? Yeah last week and so

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sorry, we're just getting to it, but we finally remember to do it

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on the Minnesota Goodbye because we're not
allowed to play it on the radio.

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They did request it on the radio, and it is inappropriate and cannot be

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played on the radio. Okay,
I don't re remember it well enough to

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remember why, but now I'm curious
to find out what it is. So

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here's Jenny's It's called Last Christmas.
Is that right? Yep? Here it

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is Jenny's Christmas song on kW parody
song what's it called? You want to

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get? Called Last Christmas? Oh? Wow? Original title? I love

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that. Yes, Now, hopefully
when I push this button, it'll all

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work and we'll find it here we
go try it once I've left and twice

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right. Yeah, Christmas Day was
lonely, but then we match that night

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you said, baby, do you
want to wow? Wow, Well it's

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been a year. I'll like some
month. Wow Jesus Christmas. You whispered

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as you pumped it, then lefting
out the same. So much fun,

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but half split. Now I know
I won't see you again. You played

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me real good and I'll cry.
And last Christmas we humped in the sect

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and the very next day you ran
away. This to save me from tears.

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I'm giving up men in the boot
until one week they want to get

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you. In the next week they
can go see you, and then you

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talk again. And these two dumb
about meeting their mommy go to vacation together,

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but you've never even been to their
place. So oh you know they're

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married, but you're crazy one and
they do then okay, wow, so

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many girls can relate. That's funny. I can see why Steve said no

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the first the second bleep. I
think the second was the problem. The

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fact that you got eight seconds into
the song and said what you wanted to

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do, and that you wanted a
blank and blank and blank. So no,

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very clever, good job, Jenny. I had forgotten about that song.

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So that goes back to like the
Steve days. Yeah, at least

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a couple of three years ago.
It probably it would have been at least

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like probably four to five Christmases ago
because I was single at the time.

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So that's why I was talking about
swiping on Tinder. But the best part

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of that was seeing that you have
some of the same reactions at the same

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time as you did originally. No, all these years later, that was

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my organic reaction. That's kind of
crazy. It is the basically the Minnesota

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Goodbye, and I think that's what
they're referring to on this one. Drake

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and heeds dnswering the phone. Drake
is. We love Drake, but a

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lot of the time he sits in
the other room and all the phones are

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ringing and blazing, and Drake is
on his phone and we don't know what

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he's doing on his phone. Don't
know, but he's probably swiping left and

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right on Tinder. That's probably what
he's doing, and he might be.

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But I just hate it when people
call it because this is how radio stations

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work. They give out their request
line number and then they never answer the

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fucking request line, and it's just
it really annoys me because I think one

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of the reasons that I love radio
so much and that I've acquired some moderate

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skill in it, is because I
know what it's like to be a listener,

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and so I know what it's like
when you call the radio station and

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they don't answer the request line.
Yeah, it's like you're either right there

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and you don't care, or you're
not there, but you ask me to

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come and support your party, but
you're not answering the calls. So when

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people call, we like to answer
the phone. All right, next one,

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And I'm originally from Minneapolis but relocated
to London about five years ago.

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I listen to your podcast every day
to help keep me connected to the cities.

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It's been a hectic year with my
one year old breaking his leg and

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being in a half body cast.
Wow a one year old. Wow.

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So I wanted to say thank you
to the Dave Ryan Show to help provide

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a little bit of normalcy and connection
to family back home over the past year.

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That is from Sonia, Sonia,
thank you very much for listening.

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Next one, echoing what a lot
of emails say. Thankful for your show

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and for you all. It'll be
our first Christmas morning where we will actually

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be at home. Normally we're all
out of town visiting extended family. I'm

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thrilled to be home with just my
crew, but now I'm a loss for

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what we should do. Please share
any Christmas morning or day traditions that you

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have that you do currently or from
your childhood, or any ideas that you

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have heard of. That is from
Kelly. I didn't have any from our

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childhood. Really nothing unusual. We
go to church on Christmas Night. We're

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going to the Vikings game this year
on Christmas Eve, so Christmas Eve we

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usually go to church. We come
home and we make oyster stew and crab

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legs. We sometimes will open one
present, and then the next morning we

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get up and we open presents.
We take our time, one person at

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a time, so you go around
the room instead of like just a big

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jumble. And then Susan makes egg
bake and then we watch the fireplace the

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ulogue and then that's kind of our
morning. What about you, Sice,

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I don't really have traditions ours.
Our Christmases are all over the place between

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my family in Wisconsin and Andrews's family
here, so we travel a lot between

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the Christmas time. But when I
was growing up, my favorite thing was

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we always did church and Christmas Eve
service was always fun because you basically just

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sang Christmas songs and there wasn't much
of like a sermon, you know,

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so that was always super fun.
And then afterwards we would go and look

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at all the Christmas lights around my
hometown. And there's one park called Lakeside

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Park that had Santa was there before
he went off and did all of his

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present delivery, and then it just
was really decked out in decorations. So

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that was our big tradition, was
doing the Christmas lights on Christmas Eve.

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That's pretty cool. I like that. It's funny because in our neighborhood there

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is an over the top Christmas display. The guy starts working on it like

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by Halloween, and is it like
the one that's sank to his music.

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It is synked to music on the
radio. He does such a great job,

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and people are like, on most
weekend nights there's a couple of cars

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parked in front of their house,
and it's just so cool that he does

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such a great job. Aye,
all right. Next one, totally different

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topic, and I love this one
all the way from Greenville, Ohio.

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This is Kaylee, and Kaylee says, I'm curious. Jenny has said in

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the past that she has paid her
student loans off. How I owe sixty

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five thousand. I paid seventeen thousand
so far, and only fifty dollars total

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has gone to principle. Wow,
Jenny, anything about paying off your student

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loans? Okay, I don't know
at what point you started paying your loans.

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So mine have already been paid off
for like six or seven years.

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But when I got out of college, I was a server, and I

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actually, like, I think there's
this misconception that servers don't make good money.

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You can make pretty good money as
a server. So I was paying

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and increments of like three or four
thousand dollars at a time once I reached

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that amount in my savings, and
so I was paying off so quickly that

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my interest wasn't building up, so
I only I did not have that much.

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I had thirty six thousand dollars in
student loans, which is a lot

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still, but I was paying them
off. And I also am just very

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good at saving money. I was
not traveling when I was younger. That's

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why I try to travel now because
I did not have a lot of fun

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in my twenties, my early to
mid to early late twenties, I did

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not have a lot of fun because
I was spending all my money putting it

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towards student loans. So you're very
disciplined that way, and I think that's

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the way to do it, because
you know, we did that with our

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homes. And yes, we've got
two homes. We had the one in

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Colorado and we've got the one in
Minnesota, and they are they're both paid

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off. We've been very lucky because
we were very, very very disciplined and

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we would pay extra so they got
paid off a little bit sooner, and

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that we did not. We got
a boat, but we got a seventeen

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foot boat that was way too small. And here I am bitching about my

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boat's too small. But we were
very, very very disciplined, and that's

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just the way we were so we
could pay extra on our house payment and

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get them paid off sooner. So
plus we're older, so we've had a

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lifetime of been able to you know, to pay off houses and that type

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of thing. So but yeah,
I mean, the more disciplined you are,

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it's kind of like this. It's
like I was telling Chase last night,

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my son, Chase is doing so
well at his TV station in Arizona

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that a couple of times they've his
stories have gone national. For example,

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there was a prom posal story that
Chase did that went national to all the

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NBC affiliates, and so after his
competition saw that it went national, they

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went and did the same promposal story
one day later, but it was Chase's

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story, And I said, Chase, the secret to success is working hard

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and having talent. Those two are
the magic bullet to success, working hard.

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And so it's kind of like financially, the secret financially is be disciplined

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and don't blow your money on shit
that you don't need. Yeah, I

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mean it also trusts me, I
get it. An important part of that

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is making enough money, and a
lot of people don't make enough. Right,

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I was gonna say it depends on
how much money you make. But

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I think that there are people who
start off making fifty thousand dollars and then

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they make one hundred thousand dollars and
they're still not saving any more money because

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they are just like, oh,
this is more money that I can spend.

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And I have been very lucky to
have the quality of I want to

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save money. There are other people
in my family who are the exact opposite

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of me. So I get it
that it's hard for some people to save

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money. I get that it is, But there's also a little mental thing

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that you fool yourself with where if
you get a raise, you think,

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oh my god, now I'm making
eighty two thousand dollars a year. Fucking

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great money, you tell yourself,
And it is. But now you think

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you've got a lot of disposable income. Well you really don't still. I

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mean, you don't have a whole
lot more disposable income. But it's like

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if somebody all of a sudden makes
one hundred and fifty thousand dollars a year

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and now they think they're rich.
Don't get me wrong, You're making really

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good fucking money, but you're not
a millionaire. That means you can't afford

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all the things that you want.
Don't listen to me. I have no

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idea what I'm talking about, all
right? Next one, I got an

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email from to my grad school account
from a Marine recruiters from the same person,

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trying to recruit me to be an
officer for seventy thousand dollars starting.

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Have any of your listeners ever heard
of this or is it a scam?

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Dave? I know you're an Air
Force family, so I don't know if

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you had any information. If it's
real, it might be something to look

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into, as I'm currently a public
school teacher and not making a lot of

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The recruiters said I'd move up to
one hundred and twenty five thousand and four

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years and cover grad school tuition and
beyond. The easiest thing to do is

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to call your local Marine recruiting office
and ask whether it's real. Yeah,

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that's the easiest way to do it. Don't take their word for it.

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It sounds like a scam to become
a Marine officer. They do want a

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college graduate and Marine and all military
branches are having trouble recruiting right now.

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But I don't know if you'd move
up to one hundred and twenty five thousand

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and four years. I don't know
easiest way to do it, very simple,

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go online, look up the phone
number of your marine recruiter and they

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will be able to tell you.
But it might be worth something to check

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into. I signed a devoted Ohio
listener Kaylee ps Dave. The way you

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tell jokes is reminiscent of my late
grandfather. It sometimes brings tears to my

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eyes listening to you tell jokes because
because practically no one tells jokes like that.

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Now I wish I knew what she
meant, but I'll take that as

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a compliment. Oh and if you're
feeling generous, I would love to have

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a listener sticker. Kayleie, you
got it. I will send you one

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out. Also shout out to Chris
who put our sticker on his garage fridge,

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the one that I accidentally called the
garbage fridge, and he sent a

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00:17:06.839 --> 00:17:10.079
picture of the Dave Ryan Show sticker
in the Minnesota Goodbye staff writer. So

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thank you, Chris. I appreciate
that. And that is going to do

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it for today. Tomorrow is Naughty
Tuesday on the Minnesota Goodbye. So if

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00:17:18.640 --> 00:17:23.599
you want to send in something Naughty
a funny love making story that went awry,

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00:17:25.000 --> 00:17:30.279
or advice or something about something to
do with anything sexual. Then send

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00:17:30.279 --> 00:17:36.039
it in to Ryan Show at ktwbat
dot com for Naughty Tuesday