Whoa, what's up, beautiful people. It is your baby mama, favorite
baby Mama, Stormy Pe And this is another episode of Chocolate Chip and Zip
the modern day female perspective, Damn Son, back at it again, and
back at it again. We got the home team in the building. We
got Dannity Kin. Oh yeah you so, but now you're back. Oh
yeah, yes. We also got Captain Cann in the building. I forgot
what camera. I was sweet baby Jesus, sweet savings it everyone was,
and everyone's favorite favorite jerk. We got chloroform color. Why am I a
jerk? Though? I don't, I don't know. The first thing that
came to my mind. I was gonna say something about you liking black girls
again, but I was like, ah, is that tired? No again,
it's a little tired. So now I just went straight to chloroform.
Crowd, right, we skipped the race and right onto chloroform. Yeah,
right onto the important stuff. Listen. Speaking of chloroform, Kyle, he
asked me a question before we started, and I wanted to kick the episode
off with this. So, Kyle X, can cheaters be reformed? Now?
What made you ask that? First of all, because you asked me
if I was a cheater, okay, and I said historically yes, okay,
okay, okay. Now do you think that you were no longer a
cheater? Though? I think it's like alcoholism. It's a choice every day
not to do it. M that was deep. I like that. Yeah.
I mean alcoholics, even when they're you know, reformed, are still
alcoholics. It's like just you can't have a shot of hendy, you can't
have a shot of jamison. They still have the cravings still happen, right,
exactly, And honestly, that's what it is. It's not about how
you feel in the inside. It's more about how you handle those feelings and
how you act. So you're saying you're still a cheater. You just know
how to handle it and keep it under control exactly. It's like, uh,
when Bruce Banner figure out how to control the Hulk exactly, Professor Hulk.
Now, yeah, let me ask you that this question. Does that
mean a difference? You know, what's crazy? Does the actions make a
difference? What you're saying makes sense. But to me, I think that
cheaters can be reformed, right. I just think you have to find someone
who you like or care about enough to where you don't want to cheat on
them. Now, I'm not saying I was a cheater. Okay, I'm
not saying I've ever been a cheater, Okay, But what I'm saying is
I do know that at some point in my life I possess some of the
characteristics of a cheater, right, And I feel like, once I came
across somebody who was really fulfilling all of my needs and was making me feel
like I didn't have to venture out elsewhere for anything, I no longer wanted
to cheat. And I'm not saying that that isn't excuse to cheat. Mark
my words, there's absolutely no reason. There is no excuse, there will
never be a reason to cheat. But I do know that once I came
across someone who I really liked enough, I didn't want to cheat anymore.
So you're saying that even though you're saying you never meant nobody that made you
not want to cheat, that's not true. Unfortunately, those relationships didn't last
long enough. I always ended up getting dumped. It didn't last long enough
for you to see if you still had to cheating. Bug. No,
no, no, no no no. I'm just saying, like the relationships
that I had where I was like all in for one reason another or another
didn't last. So you're specific in which relationships that cheating. I'm confused,
what's happening. I had not cheated in years, So I what do you
want from me? You know what? Okay, now here's another question.
What do you define this cheating? Because that could be another thing? Like
are we talking about full on penetration or are we just talking about like you
know, you're texting bitches or like you know, you buying bitches food at
your job, or you watching a movie without me When we said we was
gonna watch the movie together. Yes, that's cheating. I said, yes,
that is cheating. Okay, if we say we are watching a show
or a movie together and you watch it without me, that is cheating more
than anybody. I don't care. I don't care. Okay, don't tell
me we're gonna finish the Night Agent together and then I'll look up at your
house and Netflix then told me you don't watch it already, And don't try
to tell me you fell asleep. That's your fault for sharing Netflix profiles of
people. I know you didn't fall asleep with it on. I know you
watched it all. What do you mean from the beginning here? You know
what that bullshit I be talking about. I think that there is um various
levels of cheating and they're all just as hurtful, sexual, emotional, m
you know, action, all that stuff, and it's still cheating. It's
still cheating. Um hmm, good points points for mate. Points were mate.
Now have you ever been cheated on? Um? If I If I
was, I'm not exactly aware of it. UM. I had the girl
I lost my virginity too, pretty much outright told me that she was going
to sleep with someone else the next day. So I don't know that that's
not cheating. She made it very apparent that was what was going to happen.
I mean, were you guys in a relationship? We were until the
next day when I told that we weren't. Baby, I don't I don't
want to be the one to tell you this, but I don't think you
did a good job. It was my first fucking time. Probably not.
I still don't do a good job. Don't speak for me. You don't
know, I said me. Oh, okay, now I have another question,
all right, because someone d squattro Underscore said emotional cheating is worse because
it's the build up. So do you guys think emotional cheating is worse than
physically cheating? I think it all sucks. I think it's apples to oranges.
But I think, like Kyle said, they both suck, don't you
get for sure? For they both suck. I mean I can see like
how emotional cheating could be worse in a way because you know, I mean,
I think the way some guys go about it, it's just just like,
oh yeah, no, I just need to, you know, get
a nut out. But then I'm back from my woman, and I that's
who I want to be with, I'm happy with. But then you know,
they hear um, you know said woman is like, you know,
thinking about other guys, and it's the let me it's funny that you say
that, because not to make it a men versus women thing, but I
think that it's very rare that men emotionally cheat. Am I tripping? No?
I think when men cheat, they physically cheat. It happens, yeah,
but I mean it happens less often. Yeah, for sure. Let
me ask you this. So let's say I feel like it's all equally as
hurtful from the person who's receiving the news. If you if you're significant other,
it tells you, Hey, I have been fucking someone else, or
I have been dating someone else behind your back, or i've Your reaction is
not going to be any less severe dependent upon what form of cheating it is.
I feel like it. That's a lot of really, because if you
tell a man you cheat it, there's going to be different levels of emotion
based on what you did. If you cheat it okay, if you sucked
his dick, Oh my god, now, oh called the Paul Bears a
time for a funeral? What do you mean by you said if you cheated?
Okay? But if you sucked is like, what does cheating mean in
that statement? I think that both of them are cheating, whether you had
sex with somebody or whether you just sucked their dick, or whether the sex
involved sucking dick. So sex is less severe than sucking dick for men?
Am I lying? I don't think so. I hold them both the same.
But I do know what you're talking about because I have seen the instance
where like, yo, guys, first question is you know, did did
you ever see true detective? True? Detective? He kicks a mass over
that ship. What Woody Harrelson kicks Some dudes ask it was like, did
you suck your dick? Did she suck your dick? She'd been a dude
up over that ship? Watch you Detective? Season one? Is this a
show? It is on HBO. Woody Harrelson and Matthew McConaughey not gonna.
I don't think Witny Harrison or Matthew McConaughey would ever be mentioned on this podcast.
But look at us, look at that. Who would have thought you
had one more white person? There you go? Not me, but um
So through the wire says, I don't care what you did. As soon
as you cheat you a slut, um even if you're a dude. Apparently
apparently you're a duct you're you're no sluts. Is a slut, it's it's
it's gender neutral, gender neutral. Yeah, it's all inclusive, all inclusive.
I think I'd rather be veribally abused than jeeted on. What the one?
No? I miss her that my brain process that wrong. That makes
sense, Yeah, that makes sense. I mean I'll take some physical abuse
over getting cheated on. Yeah, I can exactly agree to that. Just
just throw a punch in my face. That's fine. What is just up
on his deck? No? No, no, no, no, don't
tuck his dick plays verbal verbal abuse. I think he is a different animal.
That's that gets down to like mental terrorism. I can't take verbal abuse.
Verbal abuse calls me to partake in. Not physical abuse, but it's
manipulation, including that. Maybe manula a part of verbal abuse. Yeah,
I would say so, I see, but my parents have always said that
six and stones may break my bones. But where whatever unless a toxic um.
I hate all of you. I just want to say that before I
go on to my next point. Does this show broken already? It's already
broken. And this is why I hate when Kyle comes because this, this
is what happens. Um So, A lot of people hate it when I
come ned correctal use only. I wanted to talk about a few things today,
and um would you guys take this journey on me? Um with me?
On you? It's the magic carpet. Oh don't you dare? Close
your eyes so we shall ride. I hope Disney flags this for copyright issues
and it never fucking comes out, just so you all now, So there's
that. Um So, I realized that we always talk about healing and you
know, bettering yourself and going to therapy, and what we don't address is
that when you're done healing, dating fucking sucks. Okay, when you are
done healing, dating fucking sucks because now you're intelligent enough. I take that
back, you're emotionally intelligent enough to realize all the red flags that are around
you. And it fucking sucks. Like it's so much harder for someone to
waste my time because I just see it. I see it coming a mile
away. And I feel like when we're talking about healing and in our therapy
journey, there should be some session about how to deal with like visibly being
able to recognize, no, the thin playing your face, girl, don't
do it, don't do it, because automatically, my first instant is to
say, you findn't playing in my face, don't do it, don't do
it. And that's not good. It's not good at all. And it's
like being able to recognize red flags early sucks. And it really, really,
I don't even have another word for it. Are you saying you wish
you could not recognize red flags early? On some level? I'm not gonna
lie, y'all. I really wish that I wasn't able to recognize it.
I really wish that I couldn't see this ship coming a mile away, because
now I can't, and it lowers the like field of people you could be
open to a lot. Dan, I was gonna say, is it because
like so many people just have red flags? Like and is it? You
know, like is it like every single red flag? You're like, nope,
nope, nope, or like some of you're like, I think that
there are common generational flat red flags. Oh yes, And I think there
are there are certain things that are specific to certain people based on you know,
shit that they might have gone through in their pass. But it's like
I can see it. So Jeff Fargo says, why is you bringing your
pass into the new relationship? You misheard me, my good brother. It's
not bringing your pass into the new relationship. It's me recognizing you want that
fuck shit that I already went through before, and I don't want to do
it no more. You know what I mean? Like, for example,
is a universal language. There are certain things right off the back already know
I don't want to partake in, and I already know you won't want that
bullshit, right for example, within the first week. No, I am
not going to text you every fucking day. Okay, that's a red flag.
Whatever abandonment issues you got, deal with that on your own. Because
I don't want to text you every day. I should not be your first
priority. Okay, you should be your first priority, and in me,
your family, your job, your hobbies, whatever comes second, third,
and so on. But I am not responsible for giving you joy or whatever
fucking fix you need by getting that notification on your phone. That's not me.
That's not my job. I don't have to do that. So if
like automatically you hit me with like you know, oh, I haven't heard
from you all day, and blah blah blah blah blah, because I'm an
adult and I have my own life, and it's like, if I'm not
purposely ghosting you, you have nothing to worry about. And I know some
of you might be like, well, stomy, how do I know he's
not ghosting me because it's been one fucking day, god late. Relax,
Relax like that's that's not cool, Like y'all like that. So you don't
want to be texted every day? I good does good morning count? Good
morning is fine? Okay, But there are some people who like, as
soon as they give you their number, they want to talk twenty four seven,
like every day they got nothing to do? You just want to sit
and text me all day, baby, I'm busy, like I can't like
and if you have time to text me all day every day, now,
I'm worried about when you got time to make money? Right? When you
got time to do you? When you got time to work on you?
Make it make sense? And you should come with a disclaimer. You take
three hours, if not longer, to take somebody back. So our one
dot feed says, no, I'm sorry, mal Underscore b Lion says,
but isn't that communication. There's a difference between communication and becoming reliant on someone,
right, And I feel like you want to text me all day?
What you're doing now, what you have for lunch? Were you at now?
Like that's not healthy? Like that tells me that you have some sort
of abandonment issue that you need to be working on within yourself, because it's
no reason I met you on Monday and you're on my line like this,
and this isn't getting to know me, because getting to know me, it's
like, hey, you know, when you get a good chance, can
we talk on the phone or like, you know, if you were an
animal, what would you be Like, it's not just saying what you're doing,
where you're going. Who you w that's trash, that's trash, trash
wolf, That's what I would be. Someone through the wires said, ain't
that much shit to talk about all damn day anyway? Exactly exactly, Like
there's no reason we need to be communicating twenty four seven yea, if we
can just skip to the whole, like sending back and forth memes and not
actually saying words to each other, Like, I'll be the happiest person in
the world, not gonna lie, if we can skip to sitting each other
memes, TikTok's reels, whatever I'm good like and I don't even have to
see a meme or TikTok before you send another one. Just low me up,
babe, Oh yes, yes, low me up. And when I
get to it, I get to it, and this will be us having
fun. That's the thing. Like I've had friends, like they've questioned,
they say to me like, oh, I'm sorry, I just sent you
like three tiktoks in a row about you, and I'm just like, I
just sent you ten so you know yes, yes, yes, yes yes.
Like. First of all, take some time to miss me. Why
do you want to talk to me all day? If you are talking to
me all day, when do you have time to miss me? You don't
need to speak to me all day. That's it. Take some time to
miss a nigga nam should like. I don't know what's unhealthy, and I
don't like it. My old performance director from the Air Force used to say
that how can I miss you if you won't let me? I agree with
that one thousand percent. How can I miss you if you won't let me?
Exactly? Yeah, my face on my damn phone. Please please,
Office says in the Book of Nigolations, y'all please because and I started saying
y'all names on alive, so y'all can stop asking me now I'm saying it,
and the Book of Nigolations. After acquisition of connected digits, thou must
remain unthirst and contact in ye chill manner. Why y'all at this absence make
the heart grow Founder saying Antonio, Yes, Shela Jay says, I'm clingy.
Give me all the attention right off the back. That scares me because
now that makes me feel like you're gonna be going through my trash. Dan,
can me, Kyle and keV read that book? Or how do we
even We can read it but we can't refer to it. Yeah, yeah,
you can read it, but you can't quote it? Right Boom,
It was like we can't Boom, we can't. We can't read Tom Sawyer
out louder. Yeah, another thing. Um, moving on, I'm sorry,
y'all. Moving on. Um, don't assume because someone is giving you
boyfriend treatment that they want to be your boyfriend. And I'm gonna say this
again, and I'm gonna say it's gender neutral. I'm gonna say it again.
Don't assume because someone is giving you relationship treatment that they want a relationship.
Okay, this goes back to recognizing those red flags. Yeah. Yeah,
Like and the part that really gets me is a lot of times these
people don't even realize that they're doing what they're doing, and you realize,
you recognize that when they say shit to you, like just because I let
you meet my mom and you ate my ass and we shared the same fork,
that don't mean I want a relationship And That's when I learned this week.
Hey, hold on, good brother, hold on, hold on and
hold on. What the fuck are you saying to me? What are you
saying to me? What does this mean? I'm confused because in my mind,
if I meet your mom and I iss your ass and we're sharing a
fark, you want a relationship? You just out here doing this with everybody
a red flag, A red fucking flag, a red flag. This is
eternal. Sincere says, situation ship syndrome. Yes, these people suffer for
from situation ship syndrome. Okay, And I feel like because their previous partners
let this ship slide, they don't know that everything that they're doing is something
you do in a relationship like make it makes sense. So Darryl the rock
Star says, just because I gave you the slow stroke don't mean we go
together. Well, what the fuck does it mean? Darren? Tell me?
Wait? Wait wait wait? Speed is it differentiator? You know when
he said slow stroke? In my mind, we are no longer fucking,
We're now making love. Do you all know the difference between fucking and making
love? Yes? I would say, nay, okay, So I feel
like when you're fucking there are um harder thrust sometimes um less intimacy. Um,
yes, it gets very porn Whereas when you're making love, you're there's
there's eye contact, there's um sometimes kissing in the mouth like while you're stroking.
I don't know, it's just a difference, dan um Okay, So
I guess I guess what threw me off at first was the whole Like,
so stroking is just the thrusting, like the that you're you're like motion of
thrust, because I always think of stroking like stroking, Like, no,
stroking is also thrusting, I know that much. But also like being intimate,
wouldn't that also be going hard in the paint then, you know,
like I feel like when I'm intimate sometimes I go hard in the paint.
You know, it's hard to explain, like, and I'm mad that the
words aren't really going there. But when you like somebody, or you're in
love, or you're with your person, you are supposed to fuck them differently
than you fuck someone who you're just in you're dating, or you know,
situation shit wise, like, but there are people out there who will legit
attempt to make love to you and then look you in your face and say,
but we're not in a relationship, but we don't go together relax,
Like, okay, so this is just me being inexperience. Yes, I
understand, yes, yes, and I won't say that. I don't think
it's being inexperience. I think that, um, it is a combination of
things, and one of them is being I'm I think one of my problems
is that I have not been in like actual love in a long time.
So you think you're out of practice, out of practice of being in love
and how to street people when you're in love, So you're malpracticing. I
don't think you use that in the right context. Not bless it's sorry.
I think the last time it's been years since, Like you know, you
say I love you and stuff like that, and it's possible to say to
meet it and say that you love somebody, but to be in love is
a different animal that I don't think i've felt in legitimately in years. You
know what's crazy. I am actually terrified for the next time that I fall
in love. Yeah, Like I don't mean like saying like I love you,
like I have love for someone, I mean actually in love, Like
I'm ready to take a charge for you, Like I'm ready to do anything
that you may need. Like I am fully terrified because, like I said,
I just know so much now. So it's like, godie, I
might really have to take a charge. God damn man. I'm sorry and
stormy, And I think to reference your earlier statement about my character, I
think that that might be a huge difference. M Okay, talk to me
about it. I mean that the fact that I have not been in love
in a long time effects my mental attitudes towards the relationship that I'm in.
While I might not have been a physical cheater or like or communicating with other
women. Uh, Like we said with alcoholics, the the mental wiring is
still there. I think maybe I need to be in an actual love.
And it's kind of like what you said, you need to write the right
person. Yeah, yeah, Do you think you're a good cheater? I
didn't act you it. And what's what makes a good cheater is you will
get caught nigga. Uh in the past, I wasn't you know. I
mean, I don't know. I mean, I can't speak for it now.
I don't know if I'm off my game. I'm just saying that in
the past that was it was pretty pretty good about it, um dick.
Another thing uh for women especially what? No, what got these open ended
responses without the reason why you asked me that question? What you asked me?
In my good cheater? I just wanted to know I hadn't it?
Okay? All right? We asked questions just here, we talked Kyle never
got a post for conversation, right, but okay, so what's what's the
resolution to that line of thinking? Nothing? The resolution is we just gonna
have to wait and see it till you like a bitch. Okay, But
I guarantee you if you if you genuinely like her and you genuinely have feelings
for her, you're not gonna want to cheat. You can't. I believe
you, I really do, until something goes wrong, until you Okay,
No, I take that back. What I meant to say was, if
you genuinely are in love with someone, right, you don't have a desire
to cheat unless you're not voicing your opinion on being unhappy about something. Because
if you're not voicing your opinion on about being unhappy on something, your brain
will trick you into thinking you have a reason to cheat. Well, she
not sucking my dick anyway, I might go off here, give me dick
sucked. Did you tell her she not sucking your dick anyway? Did you
did you tell her that you know you want to try to get your assay?
Did you tell her you want the finger in the blue hole? No,
You're just gonna go out and be like, well, fuck it.
She making me happy, she's satisfying me sexually. I'm out. But she
didn't kill her. I don't know why Y'll be making these sound drops on
what you'll be doing when I'm not here, but okay, okay. So
I think that this whole concept of there's a list of actions and things that
you need to say to get and keep a man is false. I think
that if your man is not reacting to you in the way that you want
him to do, or if he's not correcting behavior that you're asking him to
do, or you may be asking her to do because it's gender neutral,
they don't fucking want you. Hey, And this whole concept of there's this
list of actions and words indeed that you have to do to keep your partner,
it's false. These people don't want you, and they are trying to
subconsciously tell you that they don't want you. You shouldn't have to play gleams.
You shouldn't have to play games and do oh this this way and that
that way just to keep somebody Like that's trash. I don't want that.
I don't want to do that. I don't know. I think that's this
whole think like a man, act like a lady, and you know ten
ways to make her crazy about you. This is very manipulative. Yeah,
Like I feel like that's something we don't ever say. This is Steve Harvey.
That's what Stormy just said. I did not say that that Signora.
I did not say that. What I said was okay. I just think
that this whole line of thinking is manipulative when we don't talk about it like
that's crazy. These people are literally doing X, Y and Z only to
make you feel or behave a certain way. That's manipulative. It can be
gaslighting. Like that's trash. I don't want us to do that anymore.
Like, let's like people who like us. Bet uh So did you ever
hear the um? I know it came out as a book, but I
think it was just called like the game or whatever it is um. So
for context, uh uh, I took Trumpet lessons with a guy who later
became my boss. Um. And it's a long story, um, but
so high school me. He told me about this book he was reading because
he was always horrible with like women, like all throughout, like uh,
you know, high school, college, whatnotum. And it was essentially like
a whole like you know, method for how to get girls. And it
was very just like, oh, manipulative. You know what I'm talking about
now, guy who wears the funny hats. Probably I don't know that guy
who teaches men how to get girls. But all he's doing is taking advantage
of women and their insecurities and their daddy issues or whatever he had going on.
That's exactly what it is. It's the same thing, like you're literally
manipulating these people and taking a mantage of them. And that's like high school
me. He's explaining this to me for like trying to help me, like
yeah, girls, and I'm just thinking, they're like, this doesn't sound
right. And and then he, you know, years later he's complaining about
how he's always getting the same girls who have evidently you have daddy issues,
who don't know like how to be in a relationship. I'm like, well,
yes, the pickup artists, Yes, you wired the pickup artists.
The pickup artists, yes, um. But yeah, it's just like,
well, you're using the same shit you've been using for the last ten years.
It all works on the same type of woman. So and that's the
thing, right, these self help books that teach you how to move in
certain ways to get this man or this guy, it will only help you
get this certain type of man or woman. Yes, you know what I
mean. Like, it's going to be the women with the daddy issues.
It's going to be the men who think they're alpha's but actually betas. Like
they don't tell you how to get quality people. It's emotionally broken peace people
who are able to be manipulated. Right, you know what I mean?
Would you like a beta who knows he's a beta? I would love a
beta who knows he's a beta. Okay, I can I can fuck with
Okay, I can tolerate a beta who knows he's a beta. But I
can't tolerate a beta who thinks he's an alpha. This isn't going to work
now with a beta who knows he's a beta. Uh Like, Well,
one of the key things and knowing that there knowing the beta is if they're
like, yeah, peg me, that's not that's someone a dude who loves
a lot of ass play. That is not a beta. Okay. Just
because he wants to be pegged does not make him a beta. Okay,
all right, cool? So IMP I think that it's important to have a
beta who knows he's a beta, because this is somebody who knows how to
play their position. If you're a beta who think you're an alpha, you
out here trying to be Michael Jordan when you're the water boy, okay,
and now we're all dehydrated because we don't have water. It's like, and
that's not to say that the water boy isn't important. He's very important to
play his role, okay, but if you're out here trying to be Michael
Jordan, baby, you can't dunk, you can't shoot a three, you
can't dribble, you can't do nothing, Okay, So you're hurting the team.
So I would rather deal with somebody who knows they're a beta because they're
gonna play their fucking position and we're gonna win. That's it. Everybody is
hydrated electro lights for everybody. Baby. Yes, yes, Is there such
a thing as a beta point five, A beta and a half, A
beta and a half like someone who has alpha tendencies realistic ones but not quite
there, but it's a strong beta two. They're in a point guard.
I don't know. I don't know basketball, he's a quarterback. I think
that there are levels to be in beta, just like their levels to be
an alpha. So I think there could be a beta who has some alpha
tendencies, but as long as he realizes that he's a beta, that's all.
It's nothing wrong with being a cross trained. Okay, somebody might call
it out and you might have to stop up and do some alpha shit someday
you might, because you might. I think I'm a beata and a half.
I do what makes you to have Kyle give me the half? Because
I am definitely an alpha in the world that I'm most more comfortable with and
the things and the things that I know and am incredibly confident in. But
there are just some things that I can't fake my confidence in. And I
don't think that's beta and a half. I think that's a beta who knows
that they're a beta, Like you know that there are some shit that you
can't do, Like that's fine. There are betas out here who think that
they can conquer the world. And it's like, in all actuality, you
don't even know how to speak to a woman or maintain her attention like that
that that's trashed me, or like if something happens, I can't count on
you to lead the household, like I can't. You know what I mean.
You're saying betas can't lead a household. No, I'm just saying I
can't count on you. Okay, like you you can't count on betas.
No, I didn't say that. Now, Okay, we're going to the
next point. Next thing alam this shoe says. Problem is acting like you
actually like a woman today makes them think you're a beta? No, yes
or no? Right, I don't think. I don't think acting like a
woman makes women think that you're a beta. I think that realistically speaking,
women aren't strong enough all the time to tell men that they're not interested right,
or strong enough to just cut men off. So what they will do
is they will string these men along and then turn around and tell their girlfriends
like, oh my god, he's so thirsty. Look, I'm not texting
them back. He just stayed on my line. And yeah, because some
people don't understand that indecisiveness is a response. Indecisiveness is a decision, or
like you being distant or you being non rely liable is an answer. Like
they're doing that because they're not interested. Because best believe, if that nigga
who she likeking her DMS was on her line, she'd be hitting you right
the fuck back, the guy who she really likes when he's acting like that.
She ain't telling her friends, old girl, he on my top.
She ain't saying it. Hell no, she over here telling her girls what
colors they're gonna wear at the wedding. Okay, ladies, don't be mad.
I know I'm telling her lot right now, But am I lyon?
Am I lying? Like when men who you really like act that way,
you don't give no pushback. But when it's men who you don't want to
cut off, or you're not strong enough to cut off, or you're just
stringing along, act like that. Now you went around. Tell him right,
he is simp He a beta, he a bum? No, he
not. He just likes you and you haven't told him that you're not interested,
so he's giving it his all because he really fucking likes you. Like
that's just it. Then if she does tell him that she's not interested,
but he keeps up said habits, he's a no. Then he's a stalker.
Sierra Gole says, girls stop telling my business please, exactly by Sierra
No, I don't. I don't think that hold on a beta will prefer
for his woman to tell him how to resolve an issue instead of taking the
lead himself. I agree one thousand percent, because some people, man and
female, just aren't good leaders. And the alpha is the leader. That's
a part of being the alpha. And that's not to say that you can't
be a leader in anything. It's just that in more situations than not,
you work better being someone Because now another good thing though, and very important
to point out. I don't think you can't be an alpha if you don't
know how to take directions, if you don't know how to be a follower,
you cannot be a leader. That's just it. Point Blake, period,
right. And I think that this is another category of beta men and
women who feel like, oh well, I know everything about this one subject.
And can nobody tell me shit? And I know what's best and blah
blah blah blah blah. I don't never want anyone to tell me shit.
You're automatically abated to me. You're automatically abated to me because if you're not
wise enough to know that one man, it's impossible for one person to know
everything, then you automatically don't have all the skills that you need to be
a fucking leader. Like that's it. Like every leader had to be a
follower at one point, and if you don't know how to be a follower,
you can't be a leader. Go ahead, Dan, point to do
Alpha's believe in fifty fifty partnership? Do they believe in group efforts between the
relationship to come to decisions or problem solving? I think that and Alpha is
aware that in certain situations group input is needed. But I don't think it
has to be always like a commune vibe, you know what I mean?
Not commune, it's commune word. I'm thinking of communists, maybe severe lack
of Marxism A relationships these days. You know what I hate, y'all?
Fuck y'all, Okay, let me know. I expand abund that a little
bit because um, why uh, someone said, this is giving me that
recent Jill Squad Jill Scott quote. What quote? I ain't see it?
Tell me, tell me what it is, Tell me what it is?
Um, you said, expand on that. Yeah, okay, so I
feel like communicide, right. I think that an alpha is um smart enough
to know that, you know, one person doesn't know everything, right,
So there are certain situations where having a group input is important because sometimes you
may never understand one perspective because you never had to go through that. Okay,
Like, honestly, I think alpha knows that a man ain't got no
business telling a woman what to do with a body, So in that situation,
he would have to reach out to women and get like her input on
what she likes and what she doesn't like, you know what I mean?
All right, So alpha's are not Republicans. Kyle, shut the fuck up,
thank you, c R five. Someone says, well, I'm sorry.
Darwin Elmore says, a true alpha will consider all parties involved, feelings
and resolve it fairly. Yes. A true alpha will consider all parties involved
and feelings and reserved it. Resolved it fairly, Yes, couldn't have said
it better myself. Thank you, Thank you. Um, if you can't
tell me what to do, and then you can tell me what you're doing.
Okay, So if you can't tell me what to do, then you
can tell me what to do. But if you can tell me what to
do, you can tell me what to do. Um. Alright. Apparently
apparently that was jelly from Philly Jill Scott. I love this. Um.
So, the last thing that I really wanted to talk about today is not
the farts. Let's know, I really hate this conversation of, Oh,
you're so cute, you got so many hoes. I hate this conversation of
oh my god, you're so attractive, you got so many hoses? I
know it, right. I think a lot of people don't realize that the
baddest, the most handsome, the most attractive people don't have as many holes
as y'all think we do, because a a lot of people are, you
know, self conscious, and they don't really want to put themselves out there
like that because they're like, oh, they're at attractive, think e anybody,
why do they want me? Blah blah blah blah. B the holes
that we do get sometimes we don't want, so now we lower that amount
of holes to like, it's just we don't have as many holes as y'all
think we got. Okay, I just want to say that, especially women,
Stop telling women, oh, I know you got all the holes.
Okay, for those two previous reasons aside, women are tired, okay,
especially attractive women. We're fucking tired. Okay, We're tired. We're tired
of people playing on our face. We're tired of what we feel like is
wasting our time. Okay. A lot of us are enjoying our solitude.
We're out here going on solo trips, solo dates, like being in a
relationship with anyone is the last thing that's on our mind right now. Like
a lot of attractive millennials right now are enjoying their solitude. Respect that shit.
Okay, stop playing all these holes on me that I ain't got,
especially because I ain't got them, like god damn. Okay, I am
in a physically abusive relationship with myself. Do you know how many times I
jerk off? It's sad, Okay, So stop telling me what you take
you know, because you fucking don't. Okay, broke your vagina that is
how I broke my Jina. But you know what, I did give up
the Rose for Lint. What I gave up the Rose for Lynn. That's
not cool? Rose? Why is that not cool? No? Just kidding,
Rose? No, no, se Y, Yeah, my sex tooy.
Okay, it's Rosa's name Jerome. You know what, Now, I
do want to name Rose Jerome. I'm not gonna lie. I do want
to name my Rose Jerome now. And when I pull it out, I
want to say I said, JR. Rome's in the house, and I
want that to be like my intro for I set in the movie Rose,
the j Rose in the house, Like I'm really gonna make it like a
whole big thing. Um So yeah. So for Lyn, I decided I'm
going to give up the Rose because it is something that I love, right.
But I also decided that every Sunday I'm going to go to church or
watch church, which I had been feeling a miserably for the past few years,
bring Jerosa church. I would never bring Jerosa to church. Seek The
problem is Kyle want me to sit next to him in hell and I'm not
doing it. And for whatever reason, he just keeps trying to get me
down there, y'all. And I'm not going You're going to hell already.
Someone see her said, cut the fucking mic um Hollywood h underscore says,
a real one ain't worried about your hose. That was always my standpoint on
it, right, because when I'm dating and when I'm talking to guys who
are attractive and subconsciously in my mind, I might even had these conversations myself,
like I noticed a guy who's I automatically dead that with yeah, but
they ain't meet it. I don't give fuck like you know what I mean.
So don't don't tell women about or men about how many holes you think
they got, Like just say, I'm that nigga, I'm that bitch.
You don't matter. It ain't me though I've like in more recent years,
have tried to uh make my dating more singular. You only one dig one
person at the time. I think you told me that before. Yeah,
yeah, it's it's more of a like. And I think we said this
before the show. I don't have my time has spread out so thin.
I can't spread my attention out anymore, you know, And I don't know.
That's the thing about that I never understood about dating multiple people at the
same time, because how are you How can you ever be so sure about
one person if you're spreading your attention out so fucking thin? Well, you
know what the problem is a lot of people aren't able to differentiate or handle
giving their attention to just one person without catching feelings really fast. I think
that's his skill set that one should probably learn. That's not exactly what I
was talking about, but I understand how that happens. Are you saying that
it's more likely for someone to have that happened to them if they date one
person at the time. I'm not gonna lie. I know that a lot
of my female friends who purposely go out and date one person at a time
usually end up telling us what color bridesmates were dresses we're wearing within the first
couple weeks. So then, what's the benefit of dating multiple people at a
time that they just don't fall faster? Or I think you don't fall faster.
I think you enjoy getting to know multiple people. I think that when
you're dating multiple people at one time, you're less likely to put up with
bullshit Because it's like, why I'm gonna sit here and complain about how you
never take me on a date. You just keep inviting me to your house
when it is possible. Because these two men over here are fine going on
a walk, or fine going to the museum, or fine going out to
eat. Why are you acting like that's something that I can't get? But
shouldn't you know what you don't and don't want them? You should, right?
So I feel like as an adult, you should address a person like,
hey, I like hanging out with you, but this is like third
time you'ven inviting me to your house. I would like to go on a
date, a proper date. Cool, right. There's some people who will
spend you and be like, Okay, yeah, we can set something up
next week. But what you're doing to night, No, you want to,
you want to for a drink, you want chill, blah bla blah
blah blah. And it's like, when you're only dating one person, you
can fall victim to that shit. Sierra, get off my life, Sierra,
get on my life. Time you're talking about me verse thirty six to
forty eight hours. See, some people will playing away in that fast.
I don't know. I feel like it's a hindrance in some way. I
understand what you're saying. And I think that that is especially true for people
who have certain lifestyles right less time to get you know what kW I think
it's also a thing like you know, um, you know, like when
you're first entering the dating pool, you know, after you feel ready to
be in the dating pool, like you kind of want to you know,
test the waters and like several different things, but you don't want to like
be dating several people for months for years, like yeah, you know,
you try it out for a couple of weeks and then like, you know,
yeah, it's a it's um, it's a bracket. Like you just
start breaking down, like okay, I like, you know, these two
people bear all right now, I like this one person better. You just
keep you know. Yeah, And I think that you're you're you're honestly,
nine times out of ten, you're not going to be dating multiple people for
a long period of time, right, Like the cream will always rise to
the top. Like and I think that's a little bit of what I was
trying to say with why would I have to put up with this when I
know somebody who will Like if you're dating like three people at a time,
the more that people aren't meeting your standards, your requirements of what you're looking
for, You're going to get them less and less attention until now you're eventually
just dating one person. As someone who dates one person at a time,
Oh my god, well hold on, I say, as someone who dates
one person, can Alpha says Kyle better get a trapper keeper with a schedule
in it. Can't we just get a lower third for him days? You
know, Kyle Mack, person who dates one person at a time? Yes,
yes, yes, First off, what does the fucking trapper keeper have
to do with this? I don't. So you have a schedule for what
for your multiple bitches that you need to have? This person wants me to
have multiple Yes, we all do. I'm not gonna call our bitches.
But yes, it was a guy. So so remember when you show up
to the industry event with a binder and everyone called you out for it?
What the fuck did you have a bind? Gap? Because I had flyers
and business cards all one place and it was a it was a it was
a networking event. I was the only white person there and I was the
only one had a binder and I yes, no one came to the networking
event with any networking materials at all. Kyle, I'm gonna be I'm gonna
be rerod with you. Not only were you the only white person there,
you acted like a white person Like that's even worse. But why the fuck
are you add a networking event, wait a fucking Flyers and Sharp because I
wanted the podcast awareness to go out. I had flyers, I had business
cards, I had stats. Kyle, you didn't see the Hennessy on a
flyer. There was no Hennessy on the fire. Well it should have been,
so you would have known not to bring it. All right, the
only other person who had a business card was DJ at the event. But
no. What I'm saying is is, as someone who dates one person at
a time, I think the frustration for the person who does that when they're
trying to date someone who has who has made it clear that they're dating all
the people at the same time, is, uh, you're stuck waiting.
You're stuck waiting. I mean, and it's cool to it's cool to wait.
But I think also, if you're intent is to attract the appeal of
someone, Let's say that the person that's right for you is the person who's
dating one person at a time while you're dating multiple people, if they're stuck
at home waiting for you for an unreasonable amount of time while you're going out
dating two or three other people, you could miss out on the opportunity because
of their aggravation. And it's and I'm not saying that they're being clingy,
but there's there's a reasonable amount of attention that I think might be due that
it is not given because your attention is spread out so thin. Thank you
CR five CR five for Live Board of Badge. Thank you, baby,
Thank you. But I do want to say yes to what you're saying.
But another part of that that goes into it. That's why it's important to
x people what they're looking for and what they're dating style is at the moment,
because if you're someone who's just you know, looking to be in a
relationship or dating to be in a relationship, if you run into somebody who's
just open to whatever, nine times out of tend more than likely you're not
going to be on the same page. So like you're going to run into
that. Because even if like you have somebody who's you know, dating multiple
people, if they're dating to be in a relationship. If you're giving her
the vibes that she wants, she'll be more than likely to give you her
attention and give you her time. You know what I mean? I think
I think for me, I had a bad taste in my mouth from one
of these things. Yeah, that one was too easy. She didn't shower
that day. No, no, I I was not told that she was
dating multiple people at the same time to like date three. Why didn't you
ask her? You don't ask like dating styles, you don't like you don't
ask people what you're looking for. What's you're dating style? You know?
Swindle doorf No, And I'm sure that you're about to tell me that's a
problem. I didn't say anything. I'm just saying I think you would get
better results if you did. Thank you. See our five for life for
another badge? Come on baby, yeah? Um dann how much time we
got? We got about ten minutes. Okay, let's do some edibles real
quick. Okay, So the edible portion of the show is when we read
comments, question stories that you guys send in, or any advice that you
guys might you know, want to hear my take on so oh my god,
it's so hot in here, y'all. My baby here started flying up.
How long was that like that? I don't know. Oh my god,
you're gonna hit me out here looking crazy. My chest hairs are standing
up like, oh my gosh, we like crazy baby hairs up in here.
Look. I just like crazy hair in general. Okay, because he
doesn't have exactly so um first one, So all that working out just to
dragon Nigga out of a day party this summer, y'all think I'm joking.
Okay, I'm gonna find me somebody who I like this summer and I am
going to genuinely called him and be like come over. He would be like
no, And I'm like, where are you wet? And I'm a shot
wherever he at, and I'm gonna drag his ass out the party, real
beastie like like I'm gonna be like Debo, Like I'm gonna show up to
the party. And his friends would be like, yo, took your chain,
Debo coming, And I'm gonna come up strong as shit and drag his
ass out, okay, And he would be like, I'm hanging with my
friends and I'm like what friends? Pulp? Like, really, I am
going to find someone. That's only if they don't act right, because hopefully
I'll find someone who asks right now, I gotta do all that. I'm
not saying he can't hang with his friends, but like you know, make
time for me too. But if it happens, it better be on film
because I want to talk about it. We got to see it also.
I mean, like one, you already have my phone number two. This
might be the whiteness debo debo from Friday. Yeah, okay, I haven't
seen Friday. Sierra said, snatching at hooka out your mouth, Bookie.
Butt agreed snatching at hooka out your mouth, Booky. But that's it.
That's it. Don't have a question, yea, how much would your material
suffer if you actually found the one? You know what's crazy? I think
it will be so much better if I found the one. Yeah, because
I can tell y'all funny relationship stories. We can go back to sex stories
and all that good jazz, like you know what I mean. I've been
wondering this for a while, and I didn't want to ask this on the
air, but but you asked it anyway, because fuck me right right um
now, I think that um being in a healthy, successful relationship. Would
A give me a good opportunity to you know, see if all that shit
I was talking was real true, and B you know, it would give
me another perspective because like my take on relationships right now is coming from a
hindsight is twenty twenty view. Right, I'm able to acknowledge the things that
I could have done better or the things that my partner could have done better
my last relationship, But it's not from a spot of me implementing you know,
these healthy treats, you know what I mean. So I think we'll
be better and plus you know he's gonna be fine, and we're gonna get
this bag and that's it. It's gonna be great. I can't wait.
Thank you Sierra supoard a badge. Thank you CR five for lifeboard another badge.
I appreciate you. Um next question made me, So what games do
women play on men? Y'all want to answer that? First? What's y'all
thing? And then I'll give my answer. I mean manipulative bitch game?
Well, I would I say, realistically, like they probably play like the
Sims or like, you know, maybe my crafty Mario is popular again,
like shut the fuck up, y'all. That's it, y'all gonna answer?
Um, mine was an answer I mean not, you know, including Kyle's
very chauvinistic answer. I'm sorry. I've been hurt people. I feel like
I feel like the majority of games that women play is more so just trying
to figure out if they're compatible with this guy. So they set up false
scenarios like communication wise, Okay, you know where it's like, you know,
if I was a caterpillar, like, would you still talk to like,
you know, like those stupid things like that. You know what I'm
talking about. You know what I'm saying. Oh, maybe it's the mountain
dude talking. I wouldn't talk to you if you were a caterpillar who talks
to bugs. Um, I agree, Sierra. Sierra said, um,
we just played these niggas the end. No, I'm joking. So Darwin
Oh Moore says, women played chess, Dudes play PS five what? Um,
I've never seen one girl played chess. Oh, women played chess.
I've never met one who did what I haven't. I haven't met many dudes
I played chess either, I played chess. I like chess. All right,
you guys could just tell me this today. I don't know that I've
known you for four years. I never knew that I got chess on my
phone. For the record, I don't know I play chests. We'll teach
you. Um. I. I genuinely don't think women intentionally play games or
men. But I do think that there are certain things that we just keep
men unaware of, Like there are just certain things that we don't feel comfortable.
I don't even know if it's comfortable. It's just certain ship we don't
want yall to know because we know you can't handle it. So in a
sense, it's us protecting you. Right. Story. We were talking about
some stuff before the show, and I think, um, there have been
a lot of instances for me in the last couple of weeks where things have
been said to see what I would do, to see how I wouldn't react.
That's kind of what I was trying to say earlier, right, And
then it was blamed as jokes later, but it was you know what I
mean, I take that back. I recam my statement. Yeah, I
didn't think about that. Kyle's right, Kyle's rights that ever been said somebody.
I was like, somebody clip this please? Um so I don't think
women play games or men intentionally, but I do think that sometimes women will
say things that they don't really mean just to get a response from a man,
right, And a lot of times they do these things just because they
want reassurance in a certain area. But they don't know how to ask you,
and subconsciously they don't even realize they're doing it. So like they'll say
things like, um, so you know I am, Or you'll say I'm
going somewhere, you can come if you want. A woman want to say
I don't really want to go, like, but it's not that she doesn't
want to go, she just wants you to invite her, rather than saying
you can come if you want. You know what I mean, it's not
and respectfully as someone with a vagina, I'm gonna let you know it's not.
There's different behind Yeah, like you, women want to feel welcome.
They want to feel invited. So you're saying you can come if you want,
it's not you invite me, So now we don't want to go.
I don't give a fuck. I don't want to go. But that response
is trying to incite a reaction. Yes, like they're doing all these things
to incite a reaction, Like I'm trying to think of another example, and
the games are subtle, Yeah they are. Okay, yeah, okay,
I'll take that. I'll agree with that. And it's not like all out
in your face all the time, and they're tiny games. Like sometimes women
women will show you like a woman with a fat ass, right, but
they don't really like the women with the fat ass. They really just want
to see if you like the woman with the fat ass, so to say,
like, damn, look her ass. And some women will genuinely really
be like, oh my god, this is amazing and give her credit.
But there are other women who will literally bring that same ass up three months
from now an argument, and I say, shit, when you was looking
at that bitch ass when he was walking down the street, You'll pointed to
ass out to me. You'll pointed to ass out to me. How do
we get here? What's happening? Like, I don't know, Like I
feel like there are other examples I can't really think of right now. But
sometimes when we'll say things just to get a reaction out of you because they
need reassurance or confirmation on certain things. Yeah, it sucks, um,
last one, Uh, have you ever been ghosted? Um? Um,
I imagine that Stormy, you have not been ghosted often often? Okay,
doesn't count as ghosting if they spent the block later, what does that mean?
I feel like yes, because that's what can you translate? Translate that
to us? It doesn't count as ghosting. If they then came back and
said yes, it still counts as ghosting unless like unless they said, hey,
I've got you know, I've got shit going on, so I'm cut
off communication with you for a bit or you know, something like that.
But if if they disappear and eventually come back and like, hey, it's
been monst' mister C two nine eight three Board of Badge, thank you,
baby, thank you for the support. Um. I have been ghosted.
I've been ghosted once in my life. Once in my life. And this
whole situation really grinds my gears and it really triggers me talk about it,
so bear with me, y'all right. So, in this one situation,
this man managed to love bomb me, ghost me, then gas like me.
Okay, So I just got like a crazy ass run down of all
the fucked up shit one can do. Okay, and I'm not gonna lie.
He was a white ulster. His address will run in his pockets.
He was a white So I feel like y'all should jump him tell me his
name afterwards, because there's a good chance one of us knows it. Ah.
This was like ten years ago, but I'm not gonna lie like that.
Taught me all the lessons that I need to learn in boys, and
um that's it. Uh So yeah, this person we went on a date
and he like immediately after the first date, he sent me like, um,
about you to go to the spa, right, and he would take
me out to all these events and do nice things for me. And oh,
you're closing that wind, know, huh, it's so hot in here.
Just keep it like that. Okay, I don't want to stand up
from this chair. It's gonna be well. I know I got swap as
um. Anyway, So he brought me all these nice things. He took
me to these events and it was going great and then I don't know where,
he just stopped talking to me, right, And I really hate it
because at this point I didn't understand the power and who the fuck I was.
So I was really on this man phone like texting and crying, like
did I do something wrong? And okay, this man took me to me
his mom everything, y'all. He did hit my ass, just the nigga
who got me in ass. Actually this is the man who started me eating
ass, y'all. And I'm like, what the fuck is going on here?
Like shut down right? Then circle was the block a few weeks later
like yeah, you know, um, he misunderstood one of our conversations and
blah blah blah blah blah. And then afterwards we didn't go back to the
way we were, and he was trying to tell me like no, I
think you're just in your head about it and don't worry about nigga. You're
now gas lighting me, right, So long story short, this is how
I learned what love bombing, ghosting, and gas lighting was. And for
the record, he was gas lighting me because he just was talking to a
new bitch like that was it. He was another one who only dated black
girls. So he probably knows Kyle, we don't have a club. I
think you do. I think that there's a specific Facebook page for white men
with blue eyes who only dave black women. Yes, he did, you
know. I was scared for a second of what I don't know. Yeah,
so a long story short, fuck you what's up? I'm not I'm
not upset about it now. Like if I saw him, I really wouldn't
do anything to him. No, he wasn't bald. Oh I mean ten
years ago, you weren't bald. Oh my god, I'm crying. I'm
just saying, are you sure his name wasn't Kyle? I didn't know Stormy
then, or was it? What did he did? He say his name
was my old cack. You know what's crazy. I can't wait to finish
this conversation when we end the show. Yes, I really can't. Boy,
So Hollywood Age says, you mean started you getting your ass? Sate?
Well, yeah, he was the first one wearing my ass, and
that's actually how I started eating ass, because his ass too. This is
a safe space, like, yeah, that's what happened. Right through the
wire says somewhere in the world. Doctor Umar is saying, I beg your
pardon, I beg your pardon, I beg your pardon. Doctor Umar is
definitely side on this conversation. But if it helps doctor Umar, I learn
my lesson, I'm excited. Bombastic side Kevin listen, man Um you're not
in a social media cow. Oh my god, bombastic site. No not
shaggy okay rapper. Oh my god. Um listen man. Follow up me
on the Gram at Stormy p POW. Follow up me, I want to
see Maria Yester um keV Underscore two one five. Don't start with me,
um follow me on the gram a Stormy p p e A at chocolate Chip
and sip. And if you don't remember anything else, please remember there's a
group for white men with blue eyes who aren't only black one. I love
you, guys, and I see you next week. Peace for directal use only,