Anal is our first word of the Minnesota Goodbye Anal. Now we do get
a little spicy on the Minnesota Goodbye. And yesterday there was a question about
anal on Naughty Tuesday. Now is your question? Was it my question asking
the question? It was a woman who wrote in and she said, if
I remember right, her boyfriend really wanted to try it. And she's like,
we tried it and I didn't work and whatever, and so she's like,
he really wants it. Is there any suggestions to make it work?
And I said go slow? But she wrote today she said, Dave and
Jenny, as if messaging once wasn't embarrassing enough, why I don't do anal
But it's already embarrassing, But here I am messaging it again. Only reason
is because I really wish Jenny would have been there for the story advice being
it's the first time I ever wrote in No Offense Day or Bailey. But
if not, I totally get it because it is intense. But if I
could get Jenny's reaction or advice, that would be nice. Don't feel the
need to read this on the podcast unless you want to love you all dart
Lick Now, Jenny You're under no obligation, pressure or expectations to address this,
but here it is if you want to address it at all. What
was her question? Did she have a question? Yeah, it was I
could go back and look, but I let me just see if I can
go back and look. Her name is Hey, let me look for that
email again. Yeah, okay, here she goes, blah blah blah.
Hot summer day. The pool was packed, always barely any adults, with
a lot of kids around, weed smoking, making out. Met a guy
making out by the pool. He said, I'll bring you around the corner
to a stairwell. He says, bend over. So I did. He
bent over, and I assumed he would slip it into the v He goes,
no, straight for the ass hard What did I do? I lost
consciousness, went tumbling down at least four stairs of concrete. I came to
and I said, why you stick it in my ass? And he said,
because you bent over. So now my husband wants to do anal and
I told him I was writing this story. And he goes, hey,
ask advice on how you'd get back into anal again? L O, L
so any advice? Love you all so much? And she does says something
very sweet. She says, you made a bigger difference in my life than
you know. But that's for another email. So we answered yesterday, and
of course Bailey is like, I didn't want to ask a guest that I
don't know. Well, yeah, so I said, ghost slow. Uh,
you know, start small, ghost slow, and use lubrication. Okay.
I think that that's a huge important factor for it. I mean,
I'm gonna keep it. I'm going to keep my private life with anal to
myself. But I think that you didn't have a good first experience because who
would have a good first experience in that way? Like it wasn't spoken about
ahead of time. I'm sorry. I think that anal is something that you
talked to your partner about it at the time, and I understand that the
situation was, like what sounds like is you met this person at a pool
and you guys wanted to go get it on and a stairwell. I get
that, but like, it's a pretty bold move for him to assume that
that's what you wanted because you were bent over well, he must have not
known how the whole thing works, because you can't just you can't just like
enter. You have to, like, you know, you can't. You
have to like warm up a little bit. But nobody wants to hear me
talk about it. But I would say start small, ghost slow. Jenny's
advice is loop Yest's move on. Nothing to do with that one. I
need to know why that one shoe was on the side of the road when
you see it. That is a mystery that has plagued humankind since the beginning
of the shoe. We don't know. So here's what she says. We
bought a house on a lake out in the woods. We live between two
houses while the lake house is being completely gutted and our other house was for
sale. Sounds pretentious, but please know the lake house was a shit show
that needed to be gutted to make it livable, not glamorous. I feel
you. It's like when I say I'm at my house in Colorado, I
want to be modest and not sound like I'm like fancy fancy, because it
is a very modest house. It's been in my family for sixty years,
yep, And it's very modest. It's not a gorgeous, beautiful mansion.
It's just comfortable and nice. Any Who, we worked at the lake house
every night after my husband and I was ten houred work day and we were
exhausted. One night, I was cleaning stuff up in the yard and got
into my car to go back home for the night. I got in the
car and I could smell this horrible smell. I kept driving, but I
was literally gagging. I could not stop and eventually started dry heaving in my
car, laughing at this whole situation, gagging, tears rolling down my face,
and super tired. I pulled over to look at my shoe and realized
it was covered in pooh, not dog pooh, but rather some other large
animal from the woods pooh. I was exhausted and overwhelmed that my reasoning skills
were nil, and I immediately chucked the shoe out of the window. I
felt like I finally had the smallest sense of control. I drove home with
a crazy since that I owned one small part of the day. So when
you see that really cute Nike shoe on the side of the road, think
of me, little miss Poushoe, and don't judge. I have never littered
and will never do it again. But I was desperate. Staff writer Melissa,
longtime fan. I really do want a staff Rider sticker because my friend
has one and I'm jealous, so I will absolutely send you one. And
there's a mystery solved. Why there's a shoe on the side of the road.
Do they still have over on campus the tree by Washington on the bridge
where everybody's threw their shoes in. I mean they did what I went there,
but I've been graduated for a while now, so I would hope that
it's still there, but I'm not sure. Okay. I remember when Beth
was in college at the U and she was in Pioneer, which is right
across the other side of the bridge, and we would look at those shoes
as like, okay, you at tie your laces together and throw them up
in the tree. Hello, Katie. WB crew catching up on the podcast
head to chime in about the person who said all cats are assholes. Different
story for every cat, but for that person in particular. They said they
bottle raised that kitten from a super young age. Single kittens or puppies who
do not have a mom or siblings often have more issues with biting or inappropriate
behaviors. That makes sense because our cat, Roger, was a feral cat
found in a box somewhere and he had absolute biting issues. Mom and siblings
teach them how it's inappropriate to act or appropriate to act, and correct them
when they're being naughty. It doesn't happen with single cats, and so they
are often more assholey than others. I worked at shelters saw it a lot.
Always best to adopt and spend time with a kitten or cat before committing
to them. It's pretty easy to get a cat's personality, but no matter
how much research or prep you do, some cats are just grumps. Here's
a picture of my asshole cat, Darwin. Sweetest cat ever and acts more
like a dog, yet he is still an asshole for scratching or brand new
couch, meowing at the top of his lungs, for food, sitting in
the laundry that I'm trying to fold, eating my plants, and in general
being an idiot. On an unrelated note, I had the privilege of informing
my husband recently that Dave is in mensa. I haven't brought that up in
a while. You haven't, but I think I need to bring it back.
You should that I'm in the high IQ elite mensa. I think it's
when I first started on the show and I've been here for about seven and
a half years now, that you were heavy on bringing that up almost every
day. It was a mention of MENSA and it lasted probably a solid like
six months, and then you forgot about it, and times you go remember,
you'd remember, and then you bring it back full force again. It
comes and goes because when I used to get offended because the people would text
or call in or write in and say, you don't know you didn't go
to college, or you don't get a vote you didn't go to college,
or you're stupid you didn't go to college. Well, I did go to
college. I went to a two year community college because in my field,
you don't need to spend four years in college to be on the radio.
But I always felt a little bit less than because I didn't go to college.
So I always thought I was like, you know, like good at
puzzles and little thinky thinky things. Jenny thinks things. Yeah, So I
went online and I went on mensa dot org or dot com and I took
the test. And if you pass the test online, that doesn't count because
you could have cheated and had your mom look over your shoulder and help you.
So you then get invited to do one of their monthly tests locally.
So I went down to the Burnsville Library. There were two people giving the
test and two of us taking the test, and you sit there in the
library, and the people that were given the test were extremely nice and welcoming,
very nerdy and intimidating because they watch you the entire time, so you're
not going to break the rules or cheat off of each other or trade answers,
so they watch you and there's nothing more nerve racking than a genius level
like you person watching you take a MENSA test. Yeah, and I did
not do well on the ones that were like give us the next number in
this series, like three, six, twelve, twenty four, what comes
next? I didn't get those. But they would say something like bird is
to nest as, bear is too blank, okay, cave cave yeah yeah
right, I think so, yeah, cave is good. And that wasn't
a specific answer. But I did really good on the word ones, and
I did really good on the what is that? Like they would show a
picture and they'd show a next picture and then another one. They'd say,
what should the next picture look like okay, and I did really good on
those. So so it's not like random history trivia, not anything with knowledge.
It's more logic and probably intuition or things. And that part came really
easy to me. So you don't find your answer right away. We were
in the car, got the mail. Susan said, oh my god,
your MENSA results are in, and we were right over here by Benny Hannah
on three ninety four when I opened the envelope as she was driving, and
I'm like, oh my god, I think I cried because I was so
proud that I got in. So she says, I would love a staff
writer sticker. Thanks for all the entertainment you provide me. And she also
sent a picture of her cat, and the cat's name is Darwin, and
Darwin does he's adorable. He's a big, fat, fluffy not fat,
but fluffy, Persian brown cat is adorable. All right, next one,
Hey, Dave, you may not care what I have to say, but
I respect you and I've listened to your station for twenty plus years. Please
Oh wait a second, Okay, you know it is something that is complaining
about somebody that we've had on the show, and they don't want them on
the show. It was not Bailey and it was not Lily, just in
case you're wondering, So they said, please keep me anonymous, and so
I appreciate that head zone up. But yeah, okay, interesting that that
was something that I should have pre read. Probably should have like the next
one. We did that one yesterday, So I think we may almost be
out of Minnesota. Goodbyes. Okay, let's I've got a screenshot of a
Facebook post rose Mount neighbors. Okay, neighbors. I am desperate for help
with referrals. I am in need of a lawyer. We don't even know
what type of lawyer I need. I'm pretty sure family court lawyer. And
we have no time. We put in calls to eleven different lawyers, several
agencies. Not one lawyer is called back. We don't know what we're gonna
do, what we're doing wrong, or what, So I'll keep it short.
My brother rented a home for six years and bought it last year with
his fiance. Everything utilities, cars is in his name. The only her
name is only on the house. She moved her whole family in, and
her mother, her mother's boyfriend, and her adult son everyone is physically and
verbally assaulted my brother. They've threatened to poison him, kill him, just
unbelievable amounts of stuff. He was afraid for his life, so he stopped
staying at this house and filed an order for protection on his Now X filed
a restraining order on the other adults because he cannot evict them because the X
will still rebut it. We had court for his restraining order on her.
He submitted his evidence wrong, so the courts want to throw it out.
She went and filed an order for protection on her. Let's see, it's
another page. So I got to figure out where we left off. She
went and filed an order of protection on him the same day we had our
court against her. Basically, we need to retain a lawyer that can help
with resubmitting his evidence by Wednesday this week. Then he needs this lawyer to
represent him in these cases. There is a two year old involved. He
can't get his car out of the garage. They've started to roy the house.
His dogs are being mistreated. He has four police reports in his favor,
and her order was granted immediately, so we contested it again. We've
called multiple lawyers and have used all available time, hoping and praying someone was
going to call us back. At this point, we are so desperate for
help. I think we need someone to have a family member who's a lawyer
or something. We need my neighbor's help. Okay, I'm not sure.
It's interesting. They're not asking us for help. They're saying, hey,
take a look. Seems like the dude is in quite a pickle. Sister
posted a situation along with for loyal referrals. I'm getting an inkling this is
just me. I'm getting an inkling that he's partially to blame. There's part
of me that says he is not blameless here. Either he was really naive
and dumb to let all of these fucking people move into his house, or
there's something that we're not being told about him. I'm not going to blame
it on him, but I think there's something more to this story. Yeah,
I mean, I've never dealt with anything like that before, so I
don't know what the solution is. I don't know what kind of lawyer you
even need for something like that, but it sounds extremely complicated and unfortunate for
everyone involved, honestly. Absolutely. Okay, so then it reminded me,
I saw something on the next door app stupid in your neighborhood. You saw
it, yes, and it came in my email yesterday. Give me a
second, Jenny, and I will open this next door emails you. Next
door alerts me whenever they're whenever there's something going on, just like normal notifications.
Yeah, so let me open this bitch up. So silly, I
should get on the Sant Louis Park next door app? Is it for the
whole city that you live in? Is that what it is? Or in
the neighborhood. In the neighborhood, so a woman goes on, doesn't matter.
She's a woman, but she is. I went for a walk yesterday
afternoon and there were quite a few people on the trail that runs from Tonka
Wood Road to one oh one. I came home very saddened as to how
unfriendly they are. I try to say hello to all people and make eye
contact, Yet people will look right at me and not acknowledge my existence.
What happened to Minnesota nice? I say, it does not exist anymore.
And people riding their bikes are supposed to tell you when they're on their left
and two that I saw it did not. Now this is a dumb ass
complaint of somebody who you laugh at people like this. Yep, but let's
read some of the comments. Okay, I'm sorry. People are just busy
and probably don't even realize they're doing that. Keep being you, they're out
there. Just last night, we went to Benny Hanna as a group and
a random couple sat next to us friends and we were super interested in talking.
Made their day, but then they paid for their meal. It made
an old man. Oh, so they paid for their so they paid for
our meal. Basically, that's nice. Another one says nothing says Minnesota nice
like demanding a response or questioning a stranger's ability to speak English. I suggest
taking a deep breath and moving on. So, of course somebody had to
make an excuse for the people not saying hello and saying they probably don't speak
English. I don't think anybody owes me a hello when I'm out for a
walk. But if somebody gives me a hello, I always like say hello
back, you know, for a run, I give him a little wave.
But sometimes I'll be honest with you. I've changed my tune a little
bit. I used to say I'm going to wave and smile or say hello
to anybody, man or woman, and I did. It's like, you
know what, I'm going to wave and smile because I might be the only
person that waves and smiles at them all day. But then I stopped.
A lot of the time when I see a younger attractive or even a younger
woman, that's plain I don't always say hello because I don't want her to
think that she's obligated to say hello to an older guy. So I just
sometimes just I stare down or I look straight ahead, and if they wave
at me or say hello then and a lot of them do, then I'll
of course way back. But I don't always wave or say hello to a
woman, especially if she's younger, because I figure I don't want her for
a second to think, here's some old fuck who's saying hi to me,
and I don't want to. Yeah, I mean I it's very much based
on my mood for the day. If I'm looking at people and saying hi
or not back, I'm not like anti it, I'm not like super for
it. I think everyone's allowed to do what they want to do, but
I'm more so in the vibe of like if I'm really, what's the word.
If I'm just in like go mode with my run, I don't want
to pay attention to anything else besides the fact that I'm focused and I'm running,
so I don't look at the world around me, you know, And
so then I might look like a jerk because I'm not like acknowledging someone passing
me. But I don't. I mean, I don't really care. Yeah,
I you know, it's just kind of an odd thing. And you
don't have to do anything. You're under no obligation to say hi on path
while you're running and you cross somebody or whatever. I will say. I
always when I come up on a man or a woman and they're walking or
pushing a stroller and I'm going to pass them, I always say on your
left, or I clomp up really loud so they can hear me. Yeah,
Because I was out running one time fifteen years ago and there were three
women all walking abreast taking up most of the path, and I ran along
the red the left side of them, and it scared the shit out of
them. So I don't want to do that. Nobody wants to be scared.
So I clomp up pretty loudly. Most of the time they hear me,
and if they don't turn around to look, then I'll be like,
on your left, even if I'm running, you do that when you're running
or on a bike, on a bike, always running. I I don't
know that I passed too many people running unless I'm going around like the lakes.
The run routes that I do normally aren't very high traffic of me passing
people, so I don't. But even around the lakes, I don't think
I normally say on your left if I'm right, because I think that it's
kind of expected that you're going to get passed by people pretty often around the
lakes. Yeah, I guess you're right. Yeah, that kind of makes
sense. I don't really, you know, now that I think about it,
I don't think I do say on your left. I might, but
I clump so they can hear it. Yeah. Did you know? And
I didn't know this because I don't ride bikes on the path, But if
you're riding in a group, you're supposed to say on your left, and
then as you pass, you go three more behind me. Did you know
that? I didn't know that. No. Yeah, it's just kind of
courteous because if you say on your left, and you got your two kids
and your partner behind you, and you say three more behind me, and
then so you know, Yeah, And a lot of the time I'm trying
to run on the right side of the path, but sometimes I stray to
the middle or the left side. Yeah, but what sucks is when you
get two bicyclists riding side by side and they don't want to move their ass
over while you're trying to go the opposite direction. They're side by side taking
up the whole path. I've literally had to run off the path and around
them because they won't get single file. Yeah, I'm I get pretty annoyed
with people who take up an entire path when you see other people coming.
I will say though, that one time I was rollerblading on the bike path,
which is where you should be rollerblading, and it was on a stretch
of sidewalk that was super bumpy. So I was going to the left side
to stay away from the bumps so I wouldn't fall on my ass, you
know, And I had headphones in, so I didn't hear a biker saying
on your left, and I was taking up the left side and he was
not happy with me once he could finally get past me, and I was
like, dude, that sidewalk was super sketchy. I had to be on
the side roadblade. And then I watched him because there was like probably an
elderly couple in their seventies and they were biking together, side by side,
and I don't think they heard him say on your left either, and the
guy like literally turned around and gave him that like said something really mean to
them. I could tell that the older gentleman tried to kind of like catch
up to him to say something back, because he was like trying to defend
them. And it was a very angry biker, is what it comes down
to. And so I'm like, just can we all just be a little
bit more friendly on the cats? And you know what, and some people
are just gonna be that way. I got one more. Let me see.
I can find it here. It was there a minute ago. I
promise it was no. Okay, give me a second. It is worth
it because it is. It is a good email. It's a good solid
email. Jenny, Okay, good solid em. You found it? No
still looking so okay, god son of a Okay, I found it.
Good morning, Dave, Jenny Bailey, Drake, no matter, love you
all. I'm not sure what April's why. April's email yesterday, the one
putting gen Z's and Alpha, really rubbed me the wrong way. For context,
I'm near the same age as April, and her question of whatever happened
to individuality is laughable to me. Did she not go to school in the
same generation as I did. Sure we didn't have stan Lee's or Lululemon,
but we are forgetting the camelback water bottles, the pink yoga pants, the
Hollister fur lined sweatshirts, Abercrombie if you're lucky, And what about all the
trends that came before ours that were inspired by our Paris generation? The gauchos?
Are we forgetting gauchos? I digress goucha. They're just kids going through
the same motions we did. We didn't want to hear from the from old
bags like ourselves, putting us down. I just felt like it was uncalled
for. I think it's great she found her individuality earlier in life, but
that's not exactly how high school goes for the rest of us. Even so,
I imagine her inner circle had their own trends they followed, and there's
nothing wrong with that. I just think that as adults, it's not our
job to put down the generations younger than us. They are literal children.
We didn't appreciate it when boomers did it to us, and that leaves a
toxicity the generations with the generations to this day. Instead, it'd be better
to lead by ample, give them a little chuckle when they do something cringy
that reminds of our youth. Don't get me wrong, I'm not thirty yet,
I still have youth. I don't know rant over. I suppose let's
be nice to other people's kids while we do our best to raise kind,
respectful humans of our own, who will eventually find their own path as we
all do. Any hoodle, I've never heard that before. I hope you
have a dart licking great day. Thanks for all the laughs, Dominique,
Dominique, we went everything from individuality to anal advice today. I think we
covered a wide spectrum of entertaining issues. There is no emergency poop stories today
and no complaints about how the podcast doesn't work right, so I think it
was good. That's good. If we missed anything or you want to comment
everything from individuality to anal advice. We'd love to hear from you. Send
your emails to Ryan's show at KDWB dot com. I won't be on the
next couple of Minnesota goodbyes, so maybe you want to talk about me,
and Jenny and Drake can talk shit about me while I'm not here. Okay,
we don't do that. At least I was on the record, not
on the record exactly. And that is it for the Minnesota goodbye. Thank
you for listening. Send your emails to Ryan Show at KDWB dot com.