Everything is just messy, but all is fair in love and sea rats to
me, laughs at some insinuation that Natalia makes, and Sandy, having gone
through the leadership management circuit, having gone through recovery, having read and listened
to no less than fifty seven self help books, knows that this is just
not something that can be done from a leadership position. I mean, you
can't laugh like this. Welcome aboard another brand spanking new episode of another Blowdeck
podcast. My name is Dylan. I am far, far, far away.
Not saddle that next to one Patrick kicking. No, we're not together.
I miss you, Dell. It's not the same not having you in
the same rum pal. No, I know, it's not the same at
all. We're in very different places. I'm in Virginia, you were in
Los Angeles. There are trees here. There are also Can you hear my
family screaming right now? Oh no, no, no, no, no.
Finish your thought, Dylan, it's it's very mine. I actually like
the ambience of the love of a family. Okay, it sounds like you
guys are having dinner back there or something. We're playing a game called I
think it's called blank slate, and you pull up a word and then everybody
gets to write on the whiteboard what it is. So the most recent clue
was Maine, and I wrote bitch and everyone else wrote street except for my
wife who wrote how and it was it was a beautiful that's why you're married.
Yeah, exactly. You finish each other's sentences, hondo pe baby,
So listen, Pat, we got to hit some PSAs before we get out
of the way. One of them should probably be about how people need to
shut the fuck up that this is a zoom show. Go ahead, yes,
yes, yes, yes, Look, Dylan and I don't think I've
taken a week off in like two years, so God forbid one of us
has to travel. Well, when one of us has to travel, the
only way that we can record this to deliver this very popular podcast is to
a little technology called zoom. Zoom is inferior to how we typically record this
podcast, so we're doing it anyway, and please refrain from any comments.
Shut up. You know you were total American Airlines employee there for pretty much
the entire time, and then you told them to shut up, so you
saved it. But anyways, we have other public service announcements. Pat,
thanks for going Gangbusters. We can't thank you guys enough. I mean,
my goodness, the growth the numbers are up. Thank you for sharing the
show and to reward you as listeners of this another blow podcast feed, we're
going to add a second show. That second show is Winterhouse. Why would
we put Winterhouse on a below deck feed, well, dill Well, audience,
that's because half the cast of this season's Bravos Presents winter House is below
deck c rats, including a captain. Captain Sandy makes an appearance at Winterhouse.
Dare I say that's jumping the shark, but fuck it, they did
it anyway. Yeah, and you guys know, go to patreon dot com
for lots of other fun stuff. I will be recapping my trip. Some
of the fun stories include, you know, winter Houses. Maybe Hannah Burner
wasn't on that, but Summerhouses. Hannah Berner's boyfriend Dez saw him do stand
up at the Comedy Seller. That was an experience. Also went to Interactive
Theater where I saw a lot of cocks and somebody with a goat head,
poor blood all over a naked woman who was screaming with a baby in her
hand. So we'll talk about all that kind of stuff at patreon dot com.
Slash another podcast, Oh diill if you don't mind, let me do
one more tease on another podcast show, which is at our five dollars.
Here, I will be sharing a story where I got any road rate in
road rage incident this past Friday and the other person decided to threaten me with
a gun, so I will run everybody through that story. We just have
really really fun stuff coming to Patreon, so hop over there. But what
are we here to do tonight with one of the most fun things talk about
below Deck? Unfortunately for me if I could get into my pots, it
wasn't that fun for me tonight. Hmm, you go with me going,
of course, just a unremarkable episode of Below Deck med. An unremarkable episode
of below Deck med. Let's get the charter guests off, let's go sucking
fuck, let's let's do some binge drinking, and let's per ourselves of this
energy because this is not sustainable. Okay, there's too much backstabbing, there's
too much nastiness, there's too much toxicity. This early on in the season,
it gives you this sense of dread in your balls or whatever organs you
have that this is not going to be a good season, and nobody wants
that. People want to be optimistic, people want to see hope ahead of
them. That's not what we have right now. We are in the doldrums.
Natalia is a vile human being right now, a wow Chile human being.
If I was to me, I would either put eyedrops in whatever Stanley
cup she's drinking out of, or I would just try to get her fired.
I would just say I can't work with her. She's gone now,
Dylan, not a good episode, six Pots. I agree with of your
thoughts on that, Dylan. This environment is too toxic, too toxic for
my television. It reminded me of horrible jobs I've had where my co workers
are constantly backstabbing each other and that's not enjoyable. It's fun for a little
while and then it gets really old and you want the people to stop talking.
So in our case, we can't have that because we got to recap.
You know, we're the number one Below Deck podcast in the world,
so we have to cover this stuff. But yeah, I've had an ass
load of the infighting. It's time to try and end this misery and become
friends or whatever you can do to work together because we want the sucking and
fucking. That's the important part of this show. The fan, the sucking,
and the fucking. Mm hm, those three things, Dylan. One
note on Natalia. I will say her behavior this episode was unbecoming. She
would not let it go and try and communicate better and end this with Toomey
despite Toomey's efforts. That being said, Natalia, for a couple episodes,
as the chiefs do here, didn't have an issue with anybody, and so
this is like a different Natalia, and I don't know what's causing all of
this. Obviously, their first meeting did not go well, but initially both
of them weren't able to let it go. But it seems like Toomey has
now started to try and make amends with this and Italian refuses. So with
that, I will give you that natalia Is behavior is pretty bad. I
wouldn't call it vile, yeah, anyway, but I didn't like the episode
either of forty knots. Yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and call it vile.
You know, it reminded me of Danielle post Carl and Lindsay's marriage ceremony.
I know we talked about that last week, but it really was like
her going around and talking to the dish boys at the restaurant about how she
did not know that this was happening. Something that has added a wrinkle to
this is, yes, Natalia had a much easier time. She got along
with everybody, but Toomey is dealing with three things. Demanding charter guests who
have a vegan food scale. Okay, she's got, she's got whatever Shakespearean
I'm not I don't really know the plays all that well, but whatever deceitful
backstabbing sprite in whatever play, Kyle is filling fulfilling that role. So she's
got to deal with Kyle, and also she's got to deal with Natalia.
So there's a lot of things. There's a lot going on against Toomey.
But hopefully this whole thing gets sorted out. You gave it two pots forty.
So we pick up, yeah, oh yeah, I was gonna say,
who wants to start the show. It sounds like it's you. Yeah.
We pick up with quite a bit of beef. Toomy and Natalia are
not doing well, and Toomy is talking herself up like she is about to
kill somebody, because that's what you do when you're about to kill somebody for
the first time. If you're not a seasoned pro, you kind of have
to gash yourself up a little bit. And you know, we were talking
about early at dinner because this is what we talked about at dinner as a
tamdling. You know, it's there is nothing more terrifying than a human being
who has these little idiosyncratic improvements to their murder, like the Golden State Killer.
The fact that you learned how to put plates plates on people's backs,
that's like, that's like, Oh, I have this idea, I'm going
to execute it. You know, it's like an m you're talking about innovation,
don't yes, exactly, but to me it is not that I have
some thoughts on this. Okay, so the show starts off. I think
at this point both they both head back to their corners after the dustop and
can I just say this, don't because I experienced a very traumatic engagement with
another human with a stranger this past weekends. As I teased its top.
The worst thing is after you have one of these fights with someone, and
it's that five minutes after, it's one of the worst feelings. I think
it's a human being. Dude, one would aren't you being eaten by a
grizzly bear and then contemplating why did I not bring the pepper spray while he's
eating your arm? That is the worst feeling as a humand be But this
is second Yeah, or I like calling somebody fat and seeing them get really
hurt by it because you're like, boy, did I go too far?
Yeah? I go too far? All those thoughts of roll through your head.
It's not pleasant. But then what's weird about this is Natalia throughout the
episode bounced in this what a very unpleasant feeling to be taking carrying on for
a number of days. Yeah, she's She's like Godzilla. If you hit
Godzilla with a nuclear weapon, he just gets stronger, you know. But
yeah, dude, the whole episode, I was thinking about how shitty it
is to stew in this thing that they have just constant. Luckily, she's
relegated her to the sheet dungeon so she doesn't have to interact with her all
that much. But yeah, you know everybody's had this with a coworker where
you're just like, I want to I want you to be my first kill,
and hopefully I don't get better at it and eventually learn how to subdue
people like the Golden State Killer. But I want you to be my first
kill. She I guess the thing with Kyle being involved in this whole thing
is starting to come to the four and it's It's what we talked about last
week. There's no way that this guy cann There's really no way that anybody
can contain this kind of three faced back talking. Here's the insanity. Well
he is. He is Heath Ledger's Joker. All he wants is for the
world to burn. I don't think there's an endgame here. As far as
him coming on this boat, he's just starting to fire here, putting the
fire over there. Oh that fire is starting to go out. Let me
throw some more fucking kerosene on it. It's quite yeah, yeah yeah.
And then that that famous joker line where he's he says, uh all South,
South African and gay. He says, I have nothing to hide when
pressed. So we move on to you know, we'll get to them talking
to Sandy and failing to resolve this, but really quickly, Pat, what
what's your take on this Max guy? Because we can't do this guy all
season. This guy's got to get fired or swim away. It can't happen,
you know. I like a good attitude and kind of a positive attitude,
and he kind of brings that to the boat. But he doesn't feel
the same way about US Americans and South Americans. He thinks we work a
little too hard. Dylan. Yeah, he thinks everyone should sit down with
one of those fucking fancy croissants and wearing a beret outside a cafe. And
that's just not how you get That's not how you uh, you know,
earn your keeper on these boats, you know what I mean? Yeah,
Yeah, I'm wearing a croissant hat. I go at the Dominant again workshop
and yeah, if you want to see it, because it's a great hat.
I mean, pahat is it not a great hat? It's a wonderful
hat. We should probably, uh, I don't know, buy a few
while you're there doing and then we'll sell some online or something. I don't
know, what are you doing wearing a Houston's a Houston Astros hat. That's
not a Houston Astros hat? What is it? Just has an I don't
know, it just has an h on. I don't even know. Okay,
store, it's right, yeah, yeah, because you know people,
they when they first see us on YouTube, they're like, I don't know
who's who, and yeah, that's Pat Hacky and I'm chissant boy. So
go to another bull Deck podcast on YouTube. So Natalia is going around and
ship, talking to me, talking to me and the scouts or knows that
this needs to get solved because if it does not get solved, the boat
is going to hit a fucking iceberg and everybody aboard this vessel is going to
do And given given that hypothetical or what the scouser feels is a sure thing,
I agree it does need to get sorted out because that was a tragedy.
Oh oh the Titanic. Yeah yeah, man, yeah, man,
that was sad. It was so sad. Let me pull up some death
statistic Titanic real quick. I can tell you, man, I can tell
you because I was obsessed with that when I was a kid. I think
it was twelve hundred and fifty people. Wow, yeah, amazing, and
not one of them was Billy's same. So we're leaving the Dog for the
first time with these charter guests, and I completely forgot that we were in
the middle of a of a charter. I don't know how. Maybe it's
the weed, I'm not sure. But we get a little tutorial on how
to pour the proper mimosa from Mecca. Now, Pat, you are a
big mimosa boy. How do you feel about this tutorial? I believe it
was Uh it was a full glass of champagne doing blacks orange juice, So
that would just be a glass of the champs there. That is just some
bubble mimosa has orange juice in it. Yeah, yeah, and have strawberry
right right? Or charcoal that's right? What what what is your ratio for
a mimosa? Oh fifty fifty Okay, well that's patently insane. But but
the reason yours is fifty to fifty is because you're you're doing a long haul.
Okay, you gotta strip ahead of you on ad I got two bottles
I gotta kill Yeah. Yeah, you can't just kill them with ninety tens.
You gotta get drumsy fast. Okay. So Sandy, there's a pattern
of Sandy's leadership this entire episode, and it's really you got this she It's
she She Homer Simpsons, every Homer, Simpsons, Grandpa, every single person
that walks up, Harry, I have a question about what you'd like me
to do, and she just grabs some mother she turns them around, and
she goes, you got this, you got this, do your thing,
you do it. You're in charge, you make the decisions. Oh then
what do we need you here? I don't think she's driving the boat.
I think that Sandy would be really good on a sleep app or meditation app.
I do think that there is a rule within that space that people from
Florida cannot voice those things. But that's really the only thing keeping her out
of that. So get a little bit of a Meanwhile, meanwhile, Luca
telling us Laura is making his life really easy. I love this Laura girl,
quickly becoming one of my favorites. He's amazing and industrious, fun.
She's going to be his lead deckhand. But because Sandy did not give him
express permission or direct right, he's gonna wait on that. So breakfast is
syrup. The anchor has dropped, and we get to a pink underwear gossip
session with Kyle and Italia in the laundry dungeon. Yes, her and Kyle
chat and Italia she's complaining about to me and hinting her days are numbered.
And this is when Kyle does quite the hypocritical posture, takes quite the hypocartial
bost He says, are you talking shit? And then he tells us he's
realizing his involvement in all of this may have made things worse. This was
like, this would be like Charles Manson concening you probably shouldn't have hung out
with young people as much as he did, you know, and it really
understores, you know, level of involvement. Really, it would be Charles
Manson having regret that he allowed so many of his family to be a part
of a clandestine testing outfit called mk Ultra, which and listen, I got
all the vaccines. Okay. Everybody knows I got the vaccines, okay,
and everybody knows that. I'm kind of kidding Kyle. I think maybe a
source of just too much yucky this season. We've heard that he's gonna get
fired. I just that's that's going to be this kind of like I don't
know, like a wellspring of darkness like in a in a Zelda game or
something like that. I'm just very, very worried about it. So we
move on. Sandy tells to Mey that she can talk to her. To
me, you can talk to me, and that is an Abbot and Costello
thing waiting to happen. But you know, Toomey does confide in Captain Sandy.
And what does Captain Sandy say? She crouched by the shoulder. She
turns her right around and she says, you've got this. It's like,
how was help? I will say. She does leave her with some some
sage advice. She says, lead with kindness, not authority. Now go
get out of here and do whatever you're going to do. But because the
kindness line is is important and bigger issue, Sandy will step in, which
she does later on and we'll talk about it. But she does a similar
thing when she does step in. The Natalia continues to pull at Daniel at
the engagement. She's talking to Anne. This is how like? This is
how addicted to spreading this tea and Italia is She's talking to Okay, Anne
is an ironing board. She's not even a human being. Why are you
talking to Anne about this? She talks to microwaves anything that will listen.
Kind of Yeah, that's when we get a little bit of sea rat history.
By the way. I can't wait to get to to me sea rat
history, which is among, if not the most, if not like top,
it's top three bars. It is number one. It is the most
insane sea rat history I think I've ever heard. But we'll get what eight
year old ballet is important enough. This is a stadium, okay, This
is the venues not making seven hundred and fifty grand on this evening. Okay,
and there's no backup danser, but it has to be Yeah, no,
you could have. I think it would have been okay if you skip
that recital. Yeah, okay, so we get some sea red history here
though with here what what Max is? I can't say that word anymore.
Max is uh interesting? Yes, Max is interesting, and he has a
d D. And he was told to take Riddlin and through his own volition
he decided to one floor over, the one floor over the cuckoo's nest with
them. He did not take the pills. Max take the pills. Mm
hmm. Well, we don't want to advocate anybody take pills, but you
know it's your free choice, your free will. But if you have a
diagnosed problem and there is a pharmaceutical enhancement, you should take the pills for
everyone around him, perhaps not for him, but uh yeah, well we
live in a society, Patrick, I mean, you have to helpless at
some point, you do, I understand, I understand. Natalia is yeah,
the fire is spewing around the boat, and the scous are and Toomey,
despite that, are doing pretty well at this point. And the Scouser
realizes that it's because of Natalia's kind of firebrand gossip that they're his and Toomey's
relationship is strained. But we we more on that later. We've got plenty
of meanwhiles to hit here, unless you want to address anything's in particular.
We are we going to get to that surprise picnic at Santa Margarita. Yeah,
yeah, yeah, of course, because there's there's five minutes of poke
wave runners and I just have written down. Can we get to the fucking
in the sucking. I don't want us to be pervs or anything, or
for you to think that were pervs. Listen, we're happily married, committed
people who just who we lived through set. We lived through set. We
have to live vicariously through somebody. Let's get to the fucking sucking in the
fucking I can postmates poke whenever I want, and I can I can eat
it and I can go. Oh. Yeah, it isn't a good idea
to eat poke because it's trash fish for seventeen dollars. You can immediately taste
that. It's not. Okay, Yes, you can get to a castle
pick. Oh. Can I give a little history on this? I love
that. Okay. So Santa Margarita is a place where people killed each other,
and it's also where Leonardo DiCaprio is able to finger twenty five year old
models. Okay, it's nice to see the grounds of once dround in blood
now transformed into kind of a Torus destination. Yeah, you know what I
mean, which can kind of buy it now? Right? People used to
put swords to each other, right, and you go up there and party.
By the way, I did some research. I heard Leo tried to
rent Gettysburg for a day. Tourism commission said we know what you're up to,
buddy, and they would not let them out. I have been I've
been listening and watching some some press come out around Keller's of the Flower Moon,
and there's this vibe with people. I think now, given the cultural
movement that we've been going through where there are women actors who are like adults
and they're having to do press with Leo, and I could just feel like
a kind of vibe. You know, Leo, he's got the heck man,
Listen, you do all the coke you want have sex with older people.
M George Clooney. He had to hang it up. You know there's
a few of them out there, right. You can't take this into your
fifties. Pal, You're gonna be You're gonna look like a scumbag. I
know you want to finger twenty five year olds at the Santa Margarita Castle.
Okay, but we're gonna frown upon that. Okay. Yeah, it's not
cool anymore. It's just not so. While the women are lugging shit up
the mountain, Max is fucking off. I cannot do this silent film actor
anymore. I just I don't. He's kind of fun. He's in like
he's in a chaplain movie. In every scene is you know, and I
love that. Laura or Lara, I'm not sure which one it is,
just for such she hates him. She wants to kick him in the deck.
She wants to kick him in the deck. It just adding further to
the lore of her. She's just she's amazing. I love that Kyle gets
there after they've been lugging shit up and setting shit up, and he's like,
we have to walk up that. I'm sorry, we have to.
I got to get a South African accent down because we've got to do impressions
of him. I'm going to work work on that now. I want to
say this. I think I'm not sure if we're there. We skipped over
it. Jessica is starting to have an ass load of nats complaining and we
get a montage of it. So Bravo did not really dirty here, not
dirty or just kind of let it play how it's being perceived on the boat.
Meanwhile, Chef Jack has a novel idea. Hey, one of the
two you sit down in chat. Yeah, later Sandy will recommend that.
But yeah, Chef Jack thought that up. Well, that'd be a great
thing. Do you know why, because it's making his life difficult. No,
it has nothing to do with that Patrick. If they do not resolve
this, they're going to run into a fucking iceberg and everyone will die.
Lit in fucking half twelve people are going to die in the nineteen teens or
whatever it was twelve. So yes, this is when you know we're the
guest go shopping. Kyle's fat rolls are blowing in the wind, and Jessica
spills a little bit of tea here that Toomey has told her that Natalia's job
is not getting done. She's not okay with the quality of her work right
now. And all this is happening when Natalia is out having a little tryst
with Luca and Kyle like a bond girl. So I understand why Toomy's a
little pissed off. When Natalia is arrives back at the boat, Natalia,
in this where do you get off kind of way, calls Toomey up to
the bar to just fight with her. I mean, I didn't realize how
that came to be, all right, So del can I'm gonna get Can
I give the breakdown of this interaction between to Me. I guess Jessica had
some involvement in this, all right, So just catch everybody up, all
right? So first off, every all parties have a part to play in
this. In my opinion, both to Me and Natalia have been talking about
each other, and this leads to all sorts of issues. Nat has spent
the entire day complaining about Toomey to me to her lesser degree, but she
tells Jessica that Nat didn't finish the rooms. Jessica then, in a bad
game of telephone, tells Nat that to me is quote unquote annoyed with her.
Then Toomey enters the room, but or that's when Nat called her up
there and then Matt Natalia greets are with what now? And then we're off
to the races from there. So there's some plausible deniability that Natalia claims with
cleaning rooms versus freshening them up. But the argument isn't about that these two
girls hate each other. How do I do? This? Is like?
This is like tigers and I don't know other tigers. Yep, they do
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this where two people are in a row and they just despise each other for
no there's no real reason, there's no history, and right out of the
gate, they just cannot get along. Yeah, and they're both kind of
assholes to one of them one another. Yeah. You know, I guess
what happens is there's a perceived grievance and because of the communal hatred just on
an energetic level, the reaction to it is way over the top. So
there's this kind of blending of the origin, like who really started this whole
thing? There really is no chicken or an egg. It's just the two
of them just hated each other from the jump, like two estranged tigers.
So Sandy over here is the screaming, and she brings the gals up to
have a little performance review slash hr intervention here, and Natalia goes for the
throat. She says, the Tile messaged right or told her about a text
message that Toomey had been sending him about Natalia to start with that is fucking
vicious. That's like bringing a knife fight to a sanctioned boxing event and somehow
putting the knife in the boxing glove and then starting with that kind of stab.
I mean, it's just way out of line. Well, can I
say though, till that really was kind of the beginning of this, right,
we're really getting off on a foot with yours who will be your superior
already kind of potentially thinking that they could fire you or already have an opinion
of you. I've said this, and I'm not defending Natalia. I just
think that she can't, she can't let it go that it started that way,
and then I think she's behaved horribly and unable to just let it go
and try and work it out with Toomey. But maybe she's one of those
people that can't let that initial thing just like it's stuck in her craw and
she cannot let it go. I don't want to have a house floor debate
with you on this because the truth of the matter is I don't care.
But for the fan's sake, I will say I don't think it did start
like that. I think it started with them because Natalia and Toomey hated each
other before Kyle even got to the boat and told one another about the texts,
like he didn't text that Toomey was coming for her like he did with
Toomey. It was just the Everything is just messy, but all is fair
in love and Sea. Rats. Toomey laughs at some insinuation that Natalia makes,
and Sandy, having gone through the leadership management circuit, having gone through,
having read and listened to no less than fifty seven self help books,
knows that this is just not something that can be done from a leadership position.
You can't laugh like this. Sorry, I just heard myself talking and
got distracted. But it's fine, it's fine. I can't hurt myself talking
anymore. Unfortunately, this, this little this lapse, this error kind of
overshadows any conversation that we would have had, and nothing gets solved. Sandy
just says, uh, let me put my hands on your shoulders and she
turns to me around and she says, you got this, and some assistance
in navigating this diplomacy would have been really really helpful here, Sand, But
that's not I wonder if I wonder if Sandy, like you know, as
you mentioned, she's on this uh this uh what do you call it?
Life advice to her or wherever the hell she's on. I wonder if this
week she read a book that said, ah, hands off is the way
to go. Uh huh, and then she just turns on a dime,
you know, new management style, just like that. Well, I don't
do anything. There was a book about integrating Buddhism into the world place and
it's just kind of an even keelness you have to have with your staff and
you have to trust that the cup is going to be filled or don't.
I don't know what Buddhists talk about. Let's get to Kyle. Okay,
Natt once again goes to her corner and to continue to talk smack and I
just look, I understand why this was probably maddening to you. But while
she's doing that, Kyle finds Toomey to continue being a double agent, and
he refers to nat Natalia as a trapped rat that will chew her way out
of there. This is supposed to be in Italia's friend. I want to
remind little Finger want to be here. You clean toilets and fucking serve food.
It's not Game of Thrones, you idiot. It's so insane to like,
listen, you can talk poorly about people, even people that you love.
You can tell people you know. I don't think they're doing this right.
But to pull this Macavellian trap peas act and call someone a fucking rat,
I mean that you don't call people rats. That's just you don't fucking
do that. It's not right. So Kyle, you vicious bitch. Toomey
goes to ask Natalia to talk, and you know, this is again where
I don't know why Natalia is not being brought to heal. She's the third
stew I don't know why she has so much power. Who cares that she
has seventy thousand Instagram followers or whatever it is. She did not accept our
invite to be a collaborator on our posts, so it doesn't even matter.
Those followers don't matter, right, So why the fuck does n Italia get
to say no, I'm not talking to you right now. And now,
I know there has to be times when you know, you can't just force
your employees to do things, but this is uh, this is maritime law.
This there should be a hierarchy here and Toomy should be able to tell
Italia sit the fuck down. We're having a conversation right now. And it
turns out later in the episode spoiler alert, a night of rest did not
really help things. So we prep for dinner. We're gonna do uh jumbalaya.
We're gonna do jerk everything, and we're gonna need to be careful because
we've got a vegan here who wants you know, West Indies food, and
she wants it without any meat, which is listen, that's a tough putt.
That's a tough putt. But you know, I guess there are other
dishes, you know. The I don't know a lot about the cuisine down
there, and just because of the tricky history that this country has with that
part of the world. I'm gonna go ahead and move on. I'm gonna
move on. All right. Well, let's go over to Max bringing up
his work schedule and his break schedule. And this really gets onto Laura's skin.
Yeah, you know, because she just wants to work and this guy
has already gotten He's getting calls in with the labor board union. You know.
He needs four to ten minute breaks a day, a cigarette break a
bank day, and for four holidays. Yeah, and he's not allowed to
touch certain types of ropes. He can touch a lot of the ropes.
Don't act unreasonable. He can touch a lot of the ropes, but there
are just certain ones that he can't. But no, this is a This
is a pretty big flare up, and I feel like many people on the
show are not long for this show. I don't see a world where Max
makes it through this season. I just don't. Yeah, are you with
me on that? I think he's gonna get shitcted. I am, But
there's so many more unlikable people that could be shit canned before him, So
we shall see. But yes, he is definitely the weakest link in the
the exterior department. Yeah, and I'm not gonna do that American thing where
we dunk on the French. But they are lazy pieces of shit. Okay,
So no, he doesn't mean that. I don't mean that. I
want to go to Paris very very badly, and a lot of France I've
been de nice and they do not open things very often because they're lazy pieces
of fucking I'm absolutely kidding on all right, So we now get to what
is the craziest c red history in the history of this show we have or
top three? I think we said usually see rad histories are throwaways. We'll
get to one later on with Anne, who says that she got bullied in
uh in high school? Anne, why never mind breakdown to me's see rat
history. Oh you're gonna Oh boy, thanks for giving me this duty.
I can take it if you want. I could do this very colorfully if
you'd like me to, Oh, please do take it. Okay. Uh?
So to me was I believe eight? She was getting ready for a
ballet performance and again she was eight. Her father was gunned down and her
mother told her she's eight right before she was about to go on stage as
an eight year old ballerina, your father was just gunned down. Now to
me, being the Katy Perry professional that she is, oh yes, we
was able to put that bit of bummer news in her back pocket and go
out there and deliver a performance. Now, every once in a while she
did break and she had to go backstage and cry, but she wiped those
tears away. She went out and she delivered that performance to twelve or thirteen
people, and afterwards dealt with the fact that her father had been gunned down,
and maybe even worse that her mother had told her that right before she
went on stage. Jesus fucking Christ, what was that story? Oh my
god? Oh yeah, yeah, really really sad, of course, really
really sad. But but dad is made to me the tough manager that she
is. But not though, knock on wood and kiss the people you love,
because tomorrow is never guaranteed. You could have a horrific mother the toys
with your fucking mental health as an eight year old. I mean, things
can be out there. Yeah, I think she should have said out,
let's go home, and they said, well, I want to do my
ballet for him, so let's let's go get some ice cream. But that's
just me. Yeah, but that's just me, that's just you and you
were listen, You're not going to judge anybody's parenting. Leave that to me.
I don't have children. Okay. So and talks to to me,
apologizes for stirring stirring shit up. Then we get to the c red history
where she was bullied. That is just the most and shiit ever from Anne.
I mean, who was not bullied in school? No? Totally.
And I also, this is our second Sea Rat history touching upon that.
Didn't she mention that in her first Sea Rat History settment where she's a cheerleader.
It's like, okay, although I will say she also uses that as
to I think she was saying that Natalia was a mean girl as she shared
that story. Was this was sneakiness from Anne. I think that she had
no idea of the maximizing effect of this maneuver because she's Anne, which is
beautiful, because we don't need a bunch of Kyle's you know we need And
but although she is dipping her toes in the talking shit, backstabbing waters here
Dylan, I think right after this conversation, she goes to speak to Kyle
about not being a shit star, thus her being a shit star. Right.
Everyone's losing their goddamn minds on this yacht. This is like one of
those aluminum drums with all the ice in the truly is in it, but
it's filled with shit and everyone's stirring it. That's what the season is.
It's crazy Kyle hilariously. So he's like a way I don't want to compare
to gay men like this, but I don't think it's it's unpc enough to
where people are going to get really pissed off, but so I'll go ahead
and do it. He's just like a way worse version of Fraser. You
know, they have the the the gay excellence and service. They're funny,
but Fraser is trying to work. Kyle is trying to kill people emotionally.
I think Fraser is a nice guy who actually doesn't like to engage in this
really immature behavior. I think, way different level than Kyle at least.
I think Fraser has a game plan and goals and you know, maybe every
once in a while he doesn't join in the team building exercise of volleyball.
Yeah, but but he doesn't engage in what Kyle's doing here. And I'd
love to get Kyle on the on the blower and what the hell were you
thinking? Yeah, well, I I say they're similar because they they have
they the same witticisms, Like Kyle is just not the same. I'm doing
a derivative and reductive thing where I'm comparing two gay men, and for that
I apologized. But Kyle has this thing where he's like, if you don't
want to die, if you don't want to die, don't fucking cross her.
And you know that's that's what I'm telling you know, that's that's where
exaggeration and hyperbole can be used, you know, like a like a rape
yer in the world of comedy. And and Kyle's doing I'm telling you he
thinks he signed up to be on Game of Thrones and he forgot that.
He just cleans bowls of ship all day. Employer, All buddy, All
right, let's get to the nighttime. Well, I was gonna say Sandy
chats with nat encouragers encourages her to have a quote unquote healthy conversation. I
want to say I feel bad for Sandy this season because you know, she's
supposed to be driving the boat and now she's constantly being forced as a role
as a guidance counselor. It's kind of odd. I forget what the exterior.
They were all eating lunch, and I think Max was there, and
I think they said that they kicked the dick today. Yeah, yeah,
I think that that's what they said. By the way, I'll take a
kick to the dick anytime. It's the testicles that are the high value target.
You kick those fuckers. They're like the centifuge and the death Star.
You'll you fucking hit them at a right angle to do will fucking blow up.
And we've talked about kind of failures and evolution and or if you're a
sane person and intelligent design, but ah, why why the testicles are as
vulnerable as they are. It just makes no goddamn sense to me. So
we get to dinner. It is going to be jerk chicken jambalaya, and
there is going to be a separate jumbalaya for a Juwa. I believe it
is her name. Leave the fuck alone. If I didn't say that right,
Oh my god, she has a vegan scale that they that is not
hers. To be fair, they throw up the cairn. But on this
evening, it's a it's a two out of ten. It is not good.
She is not happy at all and requests season fride tofu and French fries.
Now, I thought that Mecca did a really really good job in letting
to me know that Ajulia is not happy. She was like, listen,
I you know that I care about my guests. I want them to be
happy. She doesn't like her food, that's fine, But then we go
fifty yards out of the end zone. We're not even on the field anymore.
When she calls up the chef to interrogate him and break down this cat's
cradle of communication between the chiefs Do and the chef about why the tofu was
pan seared instead of deep fried in breaded. What in the world is this?
And also like what it's just like at this thing where they're like,
you know, us is powerful black woman when we put our foot down boss
shit. No, that's this is not boss shit. There are plenty of
black women that put their feet down and they do do boss shit. This
is just it's jeekesaw killer ship. It's not good at all. What the
fuck well to me feels because I guess Chef Jackets said that there the communication
breakdown was was Toomey's fault, and then Toomey feels that once again, she's
uh, she's getting it up. I guess thrown under the bus, yeah,
or to me, stuck between a rock and madness. Yeah, madness,
madness. I was gonna say a rock and an evil gay, but
it's madness. It's good because it's much more than being just Kyle. So
Natalia and Toomy failed to talk once again, and it's really a Natalia failing
to talk to me. He's open to it, but we get you to
today and Max is doing pushups obviously because he's got to get the energy out,
and the guests have no minutes left in Paradise. Now the girls are
really the girls above deck are not doing well with Max at this point.
This is going to come to a head at some point, and at the
end of this episode, the entire crew implodes. When they're dog in the
boat, Haley tells Matt to shut the fuck up, essentially, and but
the real, you know, the real guts of the end of the episode
is this interaction between Natalia and to me, Pat, you want to break
this down for the gang, Yeah, to me, Well, I thought
to Mey's approach here was really good. She kind of just said, look,
I can relate to you, we can relate to each other. Perhaps
we're kind of similar people. That's a good way to kind of get people
to let, you know, kind of let down their guard a little bit.
But Natalia ain't having any of it and immediately gets defensive and begins telling
to me how she should have behaved upon entering the boat, which is never
a good idea because you can't you can't redo things. And then I believe
Natalia agrees that she'll never be friends with to Mey, but she'll do whatever
she asked her to do, something along those lines, which is that's not
going to work out. Yeah, thank you Natalia for making this such a
great work environment. Really, you're doing such a good job. Hopefully this
gets better in the coming weeks. We've got a TBC card, as we
usually get when there is extended tired drama, because what would happen if we
were afforded a glimpse into next week. The narrative of the show would be
ruined. It would be absolutely ruin. And this really gets my cheese because
I love a next Week on so much. I love an next week on
so much and the fact that they TBC US as often as they do.
I really think it's just Bravo not feeling like editing a next week on.
I think it's ridiculous. But anyways, that's it for us jumping the iTunes
ratings and reviews, five stars, kind words. Join us at patreon dot
com. Slash another podcast network for a banger of an aps coming up.
We will announce the live meetup probably next week. Well we can't do it
on hall, It'll probably be on the thirtieth, but we'll announce the meetup
next week for the twelve dollars chier members. Join us on YouTube, Instagram,
all that fun stuff. Pat Any final thoughts or are recent, Just
remember we'll be doing Winterhouse next week, so share that. If you're not
a fan of that show, you've never watched it, why don't you give
Dylan and I give us a shot. Give it a shot, all right,
we'll see a lovely people next week. I'm Dylan saying, Pats say
goodbye. Waiter bit