WEBVTT

1
00:00:02.919 --> 00:00:07.400
Welcome to the Parenting Roundabout podcast for
the week of June nineteen, twenty twenty

2
00:00:07.440 --> 00:00:12.599
three. I'm Nicole Erdic's time here
in Catherine Heleco Hello, and Terry Morrow

3
00:00:13.080 --> 00:00:16.760
Hello. Every week we chat about
what parents are talking, complaining, and

4
00:00:16.839 --> 00:00:23.079
obsessing about right now. This week
we're complaining about anti dopamine parenting and obsessing

5
00:00:23.120 --> 00:00:29.239
about what happens when kids want to
quit an activity. We also take a

6
00:00:29.280 --> 00:00:34.880
couple of breaks for an entertainment discussion
and a recommendation roundup. Today we are

7
00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:41.159
talking about things that make us proud. So I'm gonna just send that over

8
00:00:41.200 --> 00:00:43.759
to you, Terry, because you
had a big weekend a while. Yeah.

9
00:00:44.560 --> 00:00:49.960
Yeah, my family went to the
Special Olympics in New Jersey, which

10
00:00:49.960 --> 00:00:54.079
I believe I talked about earlier on
this podcast. We had a very successful

11
00:00:54.200 --> 00:00:58.039
and fun weekend and we ate a
lot of candy. There was, for

12
00:00:58.079 --> 00:01:00.920
some reason, a lot of candy
at the Special Olympics here. I don't

13
00:01:00.960 --> 00:01:06.439
know why. Shopwright I think,
which is a supermarket chain here, donates

14
00:01:06.439 --> 00:01:11.560
all the food, and this stuff
was totally remaindered Easter candy, and so

15
00:01:12.200 --> 00:01:17.200
there were like lots of eggs shaped
things and It's like, you're not fooling

16
00:01:17.239 --> 00:01:19.200
me shop right, you didn't just
buy these for the athletes. You're trying

17
00:01:19.239 --> 00:01:23.079
to unload big truckloads of sugar.
Yes, I will take some, thank

18
00:01:23.079 --> 00:01:32.560
you. So. But another really
sweet part of the weekend was not so

19
00:01:32.640 --> 00:01:36.799
much what my kids did in their
athletic endeavors, which they did great and

20
00:01:36.840 --> 00:01:42.920
I'm so proud of them. And
yeah, but my sons they were staying

21
00:01:42.920 --> 00:01:47.519
in the doors dorms and on Saturday
night they were all going to go out

22
00:01:47.519 --> 00:01:49.120
for an activity. I think they
were gonna go see a movie, and

23
00:01:49.439 --> 00:01:53.079
my son's roommate wasn't feeling well.
He had a stomachache, probably from all

24
00:01:53.079 --> 00:01:57.079
the candy, and my son stayed
with him. You know, he just

25
00:01:57.239 --> 00:02:00.640
didn't go out with everybody. He
stay with his roommate and kept him company,

26
00:02:01.359 --> 00:02:07.480
which, ah, yeah, more
to me than coming in first in

27
00:02:07.480 --> 00:02:13.120
a race. That's a good dude
right there. And you know, the

28
00:02:13.240 --> 00:02:15.159
coaches always tell me how he's always
the first one to help. If they

29
00:02:15.159 --> 00:02:20.000
need stuff carried, or they need
stuff put away, or whatever they need

30
00:02:20.039 --> 00:02:22.919
to do, he's there to do
it. And I love that. And

31
00:02:22.960 --> 00:02:27.520
then there was a time where my
daughter was in a race and watching it,

32
00:02:27.560 --> 00:02:30.280
we thought she had come in second. But when they were giving the

33
00:02:30.360 --> 00:02:35.120
medals, they have them walk out
in order so that when they stand on

34
00:02:35.719 --> 00:02:38.960
these platforms, the person who won
gold will be on the highest one,

35
00:02:38.039 --> 00:02:44.240
and then second and third next to
them. And when they put them placed

36
00:02:44.319 --> 00:02:46.159
them on the podium, she was
on the top like she had won the

37
00:02:46.199 --> 00:02:49.800
gold, and I thought, well, we didn't think that, but yeah,

38
00:02:49.919 --> 00:02:53.120
that's nice. And then when they
came to give the second place medal,

39
00:02:53.159 --> 00:02:55.800
they said her name, and everybode
who's a little confused for a minute

40
00:02:55.800 --> 00:02:59.560
and they realized what they had done. And then she just walked down to

41
00:02:59.599 --> 00:03:00.840
the second place one and the other
girl went up to the first place.

42
00:03:00.879 --> 00:03:04.919
One of my daughter immediately put her
hands over her head and cheered, and

43
00:03:04.960 --> 00:03:10.479
I'm like, good sportsmanship, bab
sportsmanship. I just loved it because some

44
00:03:10.560 --> 00:03:16.400
kids would have been understandably upset by
that, or at least not super psyched,

45
00:03:16.439 --> 00:03:21.719
but she just was the best sport
about it. And that's the stuff

46
00:03:21.719 --> 00:03:23.439
that makes you proud as an apparent. The other stuff is great and you're

47
00:03:23.479 --> 00:03:30.319
excited, but you know, to
see your kid being a good human,

48
00:03:30.159 --> 00:03:35.000
yeah, that's what really it doesn't
have to be something big. I mean,

49
00:03:35.000 --> 00:03:38.159
the big things are great, the
graduations and the driver's licenses and all

50
00:03:38.159 --> 00:03:44.719
those things are great. But just
the small gestures of kindness, the small

51
00:03:45.360 --> 00:03:51.840
acceptance of imperfect circumstances, is just
maybe I did something right somewhere along the

52
00:03:51.879 --> 00:03:54.919
line. Yeah, maybe that's the
thank you part. The few one comes

53
00:03:55.000 --> 00:04:00.360
later. But you know, not
everything was wrong. So I just want

54
00:04:00.400 --> 00:04:03.080
to ask you, guys, have
you had anything lately the just some small

55
00:04:03.080 --> 00:04:09.520
thing that made you stop and go, that's my kid, and feel good

56
00:04:09.520 --> 00:04:14.280
about yourself and feel good about them
and feel proud. Catherine, I know

57
00:04:14.280 --> 00:04:18.079
you've had some big things. Yes, well you mentioned the driver's license and

58
00:04:18.160 --> 00:04:25.199
the graduation, but also on the
same on the same day as the driver's

59
00:04:25.279 --> 00:04:32.600
license, I had to send my
computer away to the computer hospital, and

60
00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:40.519
I went to my son had just
gotten, you know, with his graduation

61
00:04:40.600 --> 00:04:46.120
money, he got a brand new
map book, and I said, you

62
00:04:46.160 --> 00:04:49.319
know, can I borrow the old
one because I'm going to be without a

63
00:04:49.399 --> 00:04:56.759
laptop for like a few weeks,
and you know, I can't function with

64
00:04:57.040 --> 00:05:00.199
I can only do so much on
my phone. You know, I can't

65
00:05:00.240 --> 00:05:04.199
work. I can't there's a lot
of things like yeah, yeah, so

66
00:05:04.000 --> 00:05:06.120
um, so I was like,
okay, you know, no problem.

67
00:05:06.279 --> 00:05:10.120
I we have this old mac book. You know, it had actually been

68
00:05:10.160 --> 00:05:15.519
my daughter's and then she sold it
to my son and when she got her

69
00:05:15.639 --> 00:05:19.639
new one and so and then he
got his new one and it just came

70
00:05:19.800 --> 00:05:25.600
I mean he'd had it for a
few days, and so I was like,

71
00:05:25.639 --> 00:05:28.800
can I borrow the old one?
He said, well, no,

72
00:05:28.920 --> 00:05:32.959
it doesn't work at all, like, it won't turn on. It's it's

73
00:05:33.040 --> 00:05:39.839
just completely it's completely dead, it's
deceased, it's it's yeah, it's a

74
00:05:39.839 --> 00:05:43.879
brick. And he said, but
you can use the new one, and

75
00:05:43.959 --> 00:05:47.759
you just let me use his brand
new one. So it's very lovely.

76
00:05:48.079 --> 00:05:56.000
I mean I also let him use
my car. So no, it's not

77
00:05:56.079 --> 00:06:00.439
a new car at all. It's
an eight year old car. Yeah that

78
00:06:00.319 --> 00:06:04.480
not coincidentally, just came back from
the body shop where it had to have

79
00:06:04.639 --> 00:06:14.439
some work done thanks to somebody who
was learning how to drive. So so

80
00:06:14.560 --> 00:06:17.519
yeah, I mean there were some
trade offs probably involved, but still he

81
00:06:17.720 --> 00:06:21.519
was super nice of him to offer
his You would have totally understood if he

82
00:06:21.600 --> 00:06:29.000
hadn't. Yes, so lovely that
he did, Yes, and then my

83
00:06:29.240 --> 00:06:33.800
other kid was just telling me how
a few weeks ago she went to stay.

84
00:06:33.959 --> 00:06:38.639
She has this new guy that she's
seeing and she went to stay at

85
00:06:38.680 --> 00:06:44.360
his family's house, and so was
you know, the first time she was

86
00:06:44.439 --> 00:06:47.319
meeting them. But she was also
kind. She was sick the whole time

87
00:06:47.360 --> 00:06:53.199
she was there, so she did
not feel great about the whole thing because,

88
00:06:53.600 --> 00:06:56.240
you know, she didn't feel like
she was very good company because she

89
00:06:56.360 --> 00:07:00.920
was sick and um. But she
said to me, I think I should

90
00:07:00.959 --> 00:07:02.959
send them a thank you note?
And I said, yeah, I think

91
00:07:03.000 --> 00:07:05.800
that would be that would be a
good idea, you know, because she

92
00:07:05.920 --> 00:07:12.800
stayed at her house. Um,
so she did. And I just talked

93
00:07:12.800 --> 00:07:18.879
to her today and apparently the boy's
mom was very impressed and that she had

94
00:07:18.920 --> 00:07:26.519
said a thank you note. She
thought of it herself. Yeah, rather

95
00:07:26.639 --> 00:07:30.199
do you having to say? Do
you think you should write and thank you?

96
00:07:32.079 --> 00:07:35.600
Yes? And she did say to
me like, well, they're going

97
00:07:35.639 --> 00:07:41.079
away, what do I do?
And and I said, just send it

98
00:07:41.120 --> 00:07:46.079
and then it will be there when
they get back. Don't don't wait on

99
00:07:46.120 --> 00:07:49.720
it. So nice. Now I
need to get the thank you note.

100
00:07:50.600 --> 00:08:03.120
Mojo going for the other kid with
those days he's done some let's just say

101
00:08:03.240 --> 00:08:07.800
it's done. I had two graduations
with kids who are not capable of doing

102
00:08:07.839 --> 00:08:15.920
that task themselves. It had to
me write this. Yeah, yeah,

103
00:08:16.360 --> 00:08:18.720
really sort of in the back of
your mind, makes you want to just

104
00:08:18.759 --> 00:08:22.720
have a party and say no gifts, no gifts please. It is worth

105
00:08:22.920 --> 00:08:26.199
worth me to get whatever you would
have given him. I will pay him

106
00:08:26.240 --> 00:08:31.000
that money not to have to do
things to do. Yeah, well this

107
00:08:31.000 --> 00:08:37.440
this kid will be doing them himself. Take a minute, I think you

108
00:08:37.440 --> 00:08:41.480
will be nagging gently. But you
have his computer now, so m hmm.

109
00:08:43.159 --> 00:08:46.720
Yeah, well he has to hand
right handwriting them. Yes, do

110
00:08:46.720 --> 00:08:54.279
you have like preprinted graduation thank you
notes? No, we just have little

111
00:08:54.360 --> 00:09:00.879
thank you cards, and he's done
several. But he he quickly, you

112
00:09:00.919 --> 00:09:05.759
know, stuffs them in velo before. So I don't know what they said

113
00:09:05.080 --> 00:09:13.159
or whether they were even legible at
all. So I'll have to ask my

114
00:09:13.240 --> 00:09:18.000
mom when she gets her, like, could you read it? I don't

115
00:09:18.039 --> 00:09:20.720
know. Maybe it's better not to
know just it. So he did it,

116
00:09:20.960 --> 00:09:24.200
you know, Oh I didn't see
it. Yes, he's taking care

117
00:09:24.240 --> 00:09:31.159
of it himself. I'm so proud
of him. So but yeah, he's

118
00:09:31.200 --> 00:09:33.960
doing well. How about you,
Nicole. Well, actually, my daughter,

119
00:09:35.200 --> 00:09:41.919
so she acquired a new roommate a
couple of days ago, and her

120
00:09:41.960 --> 00:09:50.159
other one has since left for the
Amazon Jungle. Oh yes, she's graduated

121
00:09:50.240 --> 00:09:54.399
with a science degree and she's off
to go study in the Amazon Jungle.

122
00:09:56.080 --> 00:10:00.919
Wow wow, so yeah, so
um, so my daughter he had to

123
00:10:01.240 --> 00:10:07.679
find herself a new roommate, and
so roommate moved in. But prior to

124
00:10:07.759 --> 00:10:09.639
that, just you know, in
the days prior to the new roommate moving

125
00:10:09.639 --> 00:10:13.919
in, my daughter has been working
full time and commuting, and so she's

126
00:10:13.960 --> 00:10:18.320
away from her place for you know, several hours, more than several hours

127
00:10:18.360 --> 00:10:22.960
a day. But I face timed
her one night beforehand, and I thought,

128
00:10:24.039 --> 00:10:26.360
what are you doing? How are
things going? And she's good,

129
00:10:26.399 --> 00:10:28.639
I'm just cleaning up for the roommate, and I'm like, well, that's

130
00:10:28.759 --> 00:10:35.600
nice. Well, I mean,
she cleaned that apartment spick and span,

131
00:10:35.200 --> 00:10:41.919
She cleaned out cupboards, she wiped
out the fridge. She like just really

132
00:10:41.960 --> 00:10:46.799
went above and beyond more than when
I ever had any of my roommates do

133
00:10:48.440 --> 00:10:52.559
more than she ever did at home, right right exactly. And then she

134
00:10:52.679 --> 00:10:58.039
even left a little gift for her
because she wasn't going to be there the

135
00:10:58.200 --> 00:11:01.519
day that or that when the room
was moving in because she's gonna at work,

136
00:11:01.639 --> 00:11:05.120
right, So she left a little
gift and then she put notes on

137
00:11:05.159 --> 00:11:09.279
all the cupboards like where there's space
that this new roommate could put her food

138
00:11:09.320 --> 00:11:13.559
in. And I was just like, wow, that's nice. Yeah,

139
00:11:13.879 --> 00:11:16.519
like you know, the fact that
you a went to the effort to clean

140
00:11:18.240 --> 00:11:22.440
and then you know, kind of
help her find her way around the apartment

141
00:11:22.480 --> 00:11:28.440
with messages and yeah, it was
very I thought that was really thoughtful.

142
00:11:28.480 --> 00:11:31.679
I was like, oh, that's
really nice. So yeah, I was

143
00:11:31.799 --> 00:11:37.559
very proud of her for that.
M Yeah, and I just have not

144
00:11:37.039 --> 00:11:41.080
really seen or talk to my son
at all because he's in the midst of

145
00:11:41.080 --> 00:11:50.480
studying for some major final medical school
exam. So I know he's alive about

146
00:11:50.559 --> 00:11:54.840
it. I check in for proof
of life every couple of days, right,

147
00:11:54.759 --> 00:12:01.799
the poor guy. He is in
a world a hurt right now,

148
00:12:01.919 --> 00:12:09.200
I imagine, So I am staying
away. Yeah, well, we're proud

149
00:12:09.240 --> 00:12:13.200
of him for going through all that. Anyway, we're proud of his perseverance.

150
00:12:16.120 --> 00:12:24.600
It's a macro pride and not a
micropride, so true. Yeah,

151
00:12:24.039 --> 00:12:31.200
but well, good we have raised
some good humans apparently, so we're cutting

152
00:12:31.200 --> 00:12:35.480
ourselves on the back just a little
bit. But we'll stop there before we

153
00:12:35.600 --> 00:12:41.360
tempt fate any fre and say that's
it for today's round one. Tune in

154
00:12:41.399 --> 00:12:46.279
tomorrow for our entertainment themed Round two
and later in the week to find out

155
00:12:46.320 --> 00:12:50.120
what we're complaining about, obsessing about, and recommending. Right now where I

156
00:12:50.200 --> 00:12:52.759
was interested in what you have to
say, so drop us a comment on

157
00:12:52.799 --> 00:12:56.600
our website, our Facebook page or
Twitter. We'll find us a round about

158
00:12:56.679 --> 00:13:01.200
chat the bar

