1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:03,560 I thought I had already overcome imposter syndrome. I was like, yep, 2 00:00:03,640 --> 00:00:06,480 I dealt with that earlier on in my business. I'm all good now. 3 00:00:07,000 --> 00:00:11,160 But what I realized was that it's something that keeps showing up over and over 4 00:00:11,199 --> 00:00:13,880 again. As you get a new level. It shows up in a different 5 00:00:13,880 --> 00:00:20,519 shape and a different size as your business grows. Welcome to imperfect Action. 6 00:00:20,760 --> 00:00:24,600 I'm Steph Taylor. For years, I read all the books, downloaded all 7 00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:28,719 the freebies, and did all the courses, but it wasn't until I started 8 00:00:28,719 --> 00:00:34,679 taking imperfect action that my business had its first million dollar yere. Imperfect action 9 00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:40,479 is about doing things before you're ready, prioritizing consistent action over perfect action, 10 00:00:40,920 --> 00:00:45,520 and moving forward even when you're not sure you're doing it right. On this 11 00:00:45,560 --> 00:00:50,200 show, you can expect mindset advice, actionable marketing tips and strategies to build 12 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:54,520 a business that brings you more profit, more freedom, and even more joy. 13 00:00:56,719 --> 00:00:59,679 Are you on the list to get my daily Businesses? Every day, 14 00:00:59,719 --> 00:01:03,119 I'll send you a bite sized prompt designed to help you grow your business in 15 00:01:03,159 --> 00:01:07,319 a more intentional way. Sign up at Steph taylor dot Co, forward slash 16 00:01:07,439 --> 00:01:14,480 DBB, or at the link in the show notes, Hey, welcome back 17 00:01:14,519 --> 00:01:18,439 to Imperfect Action. This is episode seven hundred and eighty four. Today we're 18 00:01:18,480 --> 00:01:26,319 talking about imposter syndrome, something that I know affects pretty much every business owner 19 00:01:26,480 --> 00:01:30,480 at some stage in their business, and for most of us, it actually 20 00:01:30,519 --> 00:01:37,120 shows up in different ways different stages of business. I think back to twenty 21 00:01:37,159 --> 00:01:42,079 twenty when my business grew really quickly and I knew that I wanted to invest 22 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:48,000 in pitching for media. I wanted to pitch some podcasts for interviews. But 23 00:01:48,079 --> 00:01:52,040 I was holding myself back from pitching and I couldn't figure out why. And 24 00:01:52,120 --> 00:01:57,799 it wasn't until I started working with a coach, Selen da Costa, helped 25 00:01:57,840 --> 00:02:02,400 me to really figure out what it was that was holding me back from sending 26 00:02:02,439 --> 00:02:07,480 these pitches out. Like I had, I'd outlined all the angles, I'd 27 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:12,199 drafted all the pitches, I just never quite got around to actually sending them. 28 00:02:12,919 --> 00:02:15,680 And what it turned out in the end was that there was a subconscious 29 00:02:15,759 --> 00:02:22,599 feeling of not being good enough, the subconscious impulse syndrome going on behind the 30 00:02:22,639 --> 00:02:28,080 scenes that was holding me back from sending these things out. Stories like no, 31 00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:30,280 oh, who would care about what I have to say, my story 32 00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:35,639 isn't very interesting, all of those little things that we have about ourselves in 33 00:02:35,680 --> 00:02:38,800 the back of our minds. That was going on for me, and I 34 00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:44,400 had actually, up until that point, I thought I had already overcome impulse 35 00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:46,080 syndrome. I was like, yep, I dealt with that early on in 36 00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:50,840 my business. I'm all good now. But what I realized was that it's 37 00:02:50,840 --> 00:02:53,520 something that keeps showing up over and over again. As you get to each 38 00:02:53,599 --> 00:02:57,479 new level. It shows up in a different shape and a different size. 39 00:02:57,879 --> 00:03:00,759 As your business grows, kind of grows with you, as they say, 40 00:03:00,879 --> 00:03:05,960 new level, new devil. So what is imposter syndrome really now? I 41 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:08,439 googled this because I was curious because I kind of had an understanding of what 42 00:03:08,479 --> 00:03:13,240 it is, but I was wondering what the official definitions were, and some 43 00:03:13,319 --> 00:03:16,879 of them they're quite different. So the Oxford definition of imposter syndrome is the 44 00:03:16,879 --> 00:03:23,240 persistent inability to believe that one's success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as 45 00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:30,560 a result of one's own efforts or skills. I think this definition only really 46 00:03:30,599 --> 00:03:35,479 captures one tiny little part of imposter syndrome, the part where when something goes 47 00:03:35,479 --> 00:03:38,680 wrong, you blame yourself for it, and when something goes right, you're 48 00:03:38,719 --> 00:03:42,439 like, oh, that was lucky, or you say that it was because 49 00:03:42,439 --> 00:03:46,560 of somebody else's work, or that it just none of it attributes back to 50 00:03:46,840 --> 00:03:52,639 your expertise and your work. Another definition I came across was from a website 51 00:03:52,639 --> 00:03:57,599 called very Well Mined, and their definition of imposter syndrome was it's the internal 52 00:03:57,639 --> 00:04:01,879 psychological experience of feeling like a forge in some area of your life despite any 53 00:04:01,919 --> 00:04:06,759 success that you have achieved in that area. I think this definition will resonate 54 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:12,879 with more of you than the Oxford definition. You know that feeling that someone 55 00:04:12,960 --> 00:04:15,279 is gonna come out of the woodwork and say, who are you to be 56 00:04:15,319 --> 00:04:19,040 talking about that? You're not qualified enough, You're an imposter. Even though 57 00:04:19,079 --> 00:04:23,839 you might have all of the qualifications and the experience and the client results, 58 00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:28,240 you still have that lingering feeling at the back of your mind. Now. 59 00:04:28,839 --> 00:04:31,800 The third definition I came across is actually the one that resonated the most with 60 00:04:31,959 --> 00:04:35,560 me, and this is from a website called Better Up. They say, 61 00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:43,920 imposter syndrome is the condition of feeling anxious and not experiencing success internally despite being 62 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:48,399 high performing in external objective ways. This condition often results in people feeling like 63 00:04:48,439 --> 00:04:55,160 a fraud or a phony and doubting their abilities. Oh that one resonated with 64 00:04:55,240 --> 00:05:00,319 me so much because it's like this endless success that we are chasing, this 65 00:05:00,439 --> 00:05:05,879 endless feeling of I will be successful when or if, and we never get 66 00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:12,199 there because the goalpost keeps on moving. So I want to talk today about 67 00:05:12,279 --> 00:05:15,680 some ways that imposter syndrome might show up in your business without you realizing it, 68 00:05:15,720 --> 00:05:21,120 because it's not necessarily just going to show up in the one way that 69 00:05:23,199 --> 00:05:26,800 we all, like stereotypically think that it is, you know, us holding 70 00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:30,439 ourselves back because we're doubting our ability and we're worried somebody's gonna call us an 71 00:05:30,439 --> 00:05:33,319 imposter. That is like the traditional sense of it. But there are a 72 00:05:33,360 --> 00:05:36,680 bunch of other ways that it might still show up. Now, all of 73 00:05:36,720 --> 00:05:40,879 these ones that I am sharing, I'm speaking to these from my own experience. 74 00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:44,319 These are ones that have shown up in my own business or my own 75 00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:48,240 life multiple times, and some of them I have worked through. Others still 76 00:05:48,279 --> 00:05:51,959 do show up from time to time, and sometimes they'll show up in a 77 00:05:51,959 --> 00:05:56,360 completely new way and it's like, huh, there you go, there's imposter 78 00:05:56,399 --> 00:06:00,680 syndrome again. How nice, how interesting that you're over there popping up in 79 00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:04,040 this new shape. So the first way that it might show up without you 80 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:10,240 realizing it, if you are overworking and constantly putting pressure on yourself to do 81 00:06:10,360 --> 00:06:14,399 more, that might be imposter syndrome showing up in your business. When you 82 00:06:14,639 --> 00:06:17,560 don't feel like you are successful or good enough, You're naturally gonna just want 83 00:06:17,560 --> 00:06:20,480 to keep doing more, keep putting more pressure on yourself, working harder, 84 00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:24,199 trying to achieve more and more and more to get to this point where you 85 00:06:24,279 --> 00:06:28,720 do feel good enough. Except the goalpost just keeps on moving, and it 86 00:06:28,839 --> 00:06:31,480 shifts as you reach each new level in your business. It never fully goes 87 00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:38,399 away until you intentionally work on it with a coach or with a therapist. 88 00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:42,240 So unless you go and work through it instead, you might just keep working 89 00:06:42,279 --> 00:06:45,319 more, keep doing more, hoping that one day you will hit this goalpost 90 00:06:45,439 --> 00:06:49,199 of success. And it's exhausting, and it might lead you to burn out. 91 00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:53,560 It might lead you to want to close your business down, no longer 92 00:06:53,560 --> 00:06:56,319 love it, so you're done, You throw it in and you go and 93 00:06:56,360 --> 00:07:00,959 get a job. I've seen people who've done that no. Second way, 94 00:07:00,199 --> 00:07:05,040 if you are not valuing your expertise, that could also be imposter syndrome showing 95 00:07:05,079 --> 00:07:09,800 up in your business. Maybe you're looking at others around you in your industry 96 00:07:09,839 --> 00:07:15,240 and you're comparing yourself, comparing how much you know next to somebody who's been 97 00:07:15,279 --> 00:07:17,680 in the industry longer than you. So you don't share your expertise with anyone 98 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:21,720 because you don't think you know enough. Or maybe you're not charging enough for 99 00:07:21,839 --> 00:07:27,480 what you do because you don't fully value your expertise and you don't think anyone 100 00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:30,800 would pay anything more to work with you. Maybe you're not putting your hand 101 00:07:30,879 --> 00:07:35,439 up for speaking engagements or podcast interviews because you don't think that you have anything 102 00:07:35,759 --> 00:07:41,360 worthwhile to share. And all the while, you have something that is so 103 00:07:41,879 --> 00:07:46,680 unique and so valuable, and that is your own blend of your personality, 104 00:07:46,839 --> 00:07:53,920 experiences, perspectives, insides, expertise that nobody else has. Now. The 105 00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:57,959 third way that it might be showing up in your business is letting others step 106 00:07:58,000 --> 00:08:03,240 into the spotlight while you hold yourself. This comes up when maybe you're thinking 107 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:07,920 about doing a webinar, you're doing your first ever launch, and you're like, 108 00:08:07,040 --> 00:08:11,560 oh, hey, everybody else is doing webinars, but I could never 109 00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:15,360 teach a webinar because what if somebody asked me a question that I can't answer 110 00:08:15,399 --> 00:08:18,399 live. Or I want to start a podcast, but I'm not really that 111 00:08:18,519 --> 00:08:22,240 much of an expert. Other people in my industry know so much more than 112 00:08:22,279 --> 00:08:28,639 me. This is where your imposter syndrome's really holding your business back from success. 113 00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:33,399 And I've felt this one a lot earlier on in my business. Back 114 00:08:33,559 --> 00:08:39,320 at my first legit speaking gig back in twenty eighteen, which was at a 115 00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:45,480 podcasting conference, I was by far the most inexperienced, the youngest speaker there, 116 00:08:45,919 --> 00:08:52,159 and at the speaker retreat afterwards, I noticed myself holding myself back from 117 00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:56,840 speaking up and contributing anything to the group because I felt like I had nothing 118 00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:58,759 to add. They'd all been in business, some of them for ten years, 119 00:09:00,559 --> 00:09:03,720 and here I was, like in a few years into my business, 120 00:09:03,720 --> 00:09:05,879 a few years into podcasting, or not even I'd been less than a year 121 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:11,039 into podcasting actually, and I was at this retreat with all these speakers who 122 00:09:11,039 --> 00:09:13,639 had been podcasting for so long, so I thought I had nothing to say, 123 00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:20,279 and I held myself back. Now, this limited the connections I could 124 00:09:20,279 --> 00:09:22,960 build the networks, the relationships, all of that because I was the person 125 00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:28,799 who was just sitting there quietly listening and observing. And in other areas of 126 00:09:28,840 --> 00:09:31,679 your business, you know, if you're not doing that podcast because you want 127 00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:35,279 to because you're worried you're not an expert enough, or you're not doing a 128 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:39,200 live webinar because you don't think you know enough, the only result of this 129 00:09:39,360 --> 00:09:45,200 is that everybody else gets ahead and you don't. You're holding yourself back so 130 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:48,840 that the other people who say are ahead of you just get further ahead. 131 00:09:48,919 --> 00:09:52,360 And it's only it's not you know, they don't even know about that. 132 00:09:52,639 --> 00:09:58,960 It's really only hurting you now. If you are over teaching over delivering in 133 00:09:58,000 --> 00:10:03,720 your courses webinars, if you are trying to prove to others that you know 134 00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:09,120 enough about your area of expertise that it leads you to overteach and over deliver, 135 00:10:09,960 --> 00:10:13,759 you're actually doing your students and your clients a disservice. Right. This 136 00:10:13,879 --> 00:10:18,399 is super common with course creators. You know, the webinar that they're teaching 137 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:22,320 for free becomes this big thing of if I can just show my viewers how 138 00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:26,120 much I know about this topic. Then they'll trust me and buy from you, 139 00:10:26,879 --> 00:10:31,320 and then their course becomes this mammoth thing with every piece of their expertise 140 00:10:31,399 --> 00:10:35,960 bundled into it. And then they go and overdeliver, like way over deliver 141 00:10:37,279 --> 00:10:39,360 because they're worried that people won't see the value in it, because they don't 142 00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:43,480 see the value in themselves. Maybe you've been there, I've been there. 143 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:46,559 Right. This is exhausting, and it is doing your students a disservice because 144 00:10:46,759 --> 00:10:52,159 they don't want to learn every single thing about your area of expertise. Otherwise 145 00:10:52,159 --> 00:10:54,200 they would go and study it, they'd go and get the qualification or do 146 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:58,600 the certification. They are buying your course because they want to get a very 147 00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:03,080 particular outcome. They don't want to have the knowledge. They want to have 148 00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:07,000 the outcome, and by teaching everything that you know, you're actually slowing them 149 00:11:07,039 --> 00:11:11,279 down from getting that outcome. The fifth way that Imposster syndrome shows up in 150 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:16,360 your business is saying yes when you want to say no, and just a 151 00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:20,279 general lack of boundaries when it comes to client relationships. You don't want to 152 00:11:20,279 --> 00:11:22,919 disappoint them because you're really worried that maybe they don't see the value in your 153 00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:28,000 services, So you go ahead and you add that extra service in even though 154 00:11:28,039 --> 00:11:31,720 it's way outside of the original scope and they're not paying you more. Maybe 155 00:11:31,759 --> 00:11:35,639 you're logging in on a Sunday night to make that sales page edit that they 156 00:11:35,639 --> 00:11:39,399 messaged you about because they said it was urgent. Or you're getting up at 157 00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:43,919 four am for that phone call because that's the only time that you can make 158 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:48,679 work for them in their calendar. Man, this was me like a few 159 00:11:48,759 --> 00:11:50,720 years ago, when I was working with a lot of one on one clients. 160 00:11:52,399 --> 00:11:56,480 I was so afraid to push back and set boundaries because I was worried 161 00:11:56,519 --> 00:11:58,759 that they would just not see the value and they'd be like, okay, 162 00:11:58,759 --> 00:12:01,759 cool, just going to go to somebody else. And what ended up was 163 00:12:01,759 --> 00:12:05,600 I ended up presenting them and I ended up not doing my best work as 164 00:12:05,639 --> 00:12:09,919 a result, because I was feeling resentful as I was jumping in to make 165 00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:13,399 those sales page edits. When you know, if I had just spoken up, 166 00:12:13,679 --> 00:12:16,679 they probably would have respected my boundaries and we all would have been happy. 167 00:12:16,440 --> 00:12:20,600 But no, instead I resented them because I couldn't speak up for myself. 168 00:12:22,799 --> 00:12:26,039 If you are self sabotaging, this is the next one. Self sabotaging 169 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:31,480 any opportunities or any projects that are a little bit scary. Maybe for a 170 00:12:31,519 --> 00:12:35,519 client, like a dream client, you're self sabotaging them. That is another 171 00:12:35,559 --> 00:12:39,919 way that imposter syndrome shows up in your business. For example, maybe you 172 00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:46,720 are procrastinating, procrastinating replying to that inquiry from a dream client because you are 173 00:12:46,720 --> 00:12:52,320 so worried that they're going to say no. Or maybe you're procrastinating preparing that 174 00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:56,360 presentation for the speaking event that you're really afraid about, or you're procrastinating that 175 00:12:56,440 --> 00:13:01,039 client project because you're worried it's not going to be good enough. When we 176 00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:03,919 do this, we actually turn it into a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy. 177 00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:07,519 Right when we procrastinate replying to that dream client, we're doing it because 178 00:13:07,519 --> 00:13:09,440 we think, oh, they're not going to want to work with someone like 179 00:13:09,519 --> 00:13:15,240 me, And then you're late to reply because you procrastinated it. That makes 180 00:13:15,279 --> 00:13:18,559 them not want to work with you, and it confirms what you already thought 181 00:13:18,679 --> 00:13:20,879 was true, even though it wasn't true. You thought that to be true. 182 00:13:20,919 --> 00:13:26,279 It's confirming your belief. Right, same with the presentation. If you're 183 00:13:26,279 --> 00:13:28,919 putting it off and then you're going to rush to create it. It's not 184 00:13:28,879 --> 00:13:31,799 gonna end up being your best work, so then you can tell yourself, 185 00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:35,679 oh, well, it wasn't that good anyway, I knew it wasn't going 186 00:13:35,759 --> 00:13:39,279 to be good enough for me. How I've started to overcome this. This 187 00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:43,399 is still something I deal with ongoing, but a big shift for me was 188 00:13:43,679 --> 00:13:48,720 noticing when I want to procrastinate something, asking myself, is this something I'm 189 00:13:48,759 --> 00:13:52,679 procrastinating because I'm worried it's not going to be good enough? And then catching 190 00:13:52,679 --> 00:13:56,720 myself out there and trying to make some kind of forward momentum, even if 191 00:13:56,720 --> 00:14:01,159 it's just like outlining the very first step to getting it done. Just getting 192 00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:07,080 that done so that it doesn't feel like as much of a scary mountain to 193 00:14:07,159 --> 00:14:13,879 climb. And then number seven, the seventh way that imposter syndrome shows up 194 00:14:13,879 --> 00:14:20,200 in your business is perfectionism. Who would have thought right? Perfectionism is actually 195 00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:22,440 another form of self sabotage, but it doesn't really feel like it, because 196 00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:26,240 it feels like you are just doing your best work. You care about the 197 00:14:26,240 --> 00:14:30,759 work, so you want to make it perfect. But it comes from wanting 198 00:14:30,799 --> 00:14:33,879 it to be perfect because you don't think that it's good enough, or you 199 00:14:33,919 --> 00:14:37,080 want to prove that it's good enough. If I can just make it perfect, 200 00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:41,039 then it'll be good enough. But of course it's never going to ever 201 00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:43,840 feel perfect enough for you, right, And I see, I know, 202 00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:48,320 creatives, designers, writers, you guys struggle with this one a lot, 203 00:14:48,440 --> 00:14:52,919 I know, because you want everything that you're creating to be like your best 204 00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:58,159 piece of work. But being a perfectionist about it is a waste of time. 205 00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:03,200 It's exhausting, and it stops you from having the impact that you could 206 00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:07,000 have with the work that is simply good enough. Right if you think that 207 00:15:07,039 --> 00:15:11,120 it is seventy percent good enough, chances are somebody else is like, oh 208 00:15:11,159 --> 00:15:16,639 my goodness, this is amazing. But if you're sitting there refining it forever 209 00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:20,000 and never ever putting it out into the world, then it doesn't get to 210 00:15:20,039 --> 00:15:24,200 impact anybody, all right. So there we have it. Seven ways that 211 00:15:24,639 --> 00:15:28,879 poster syndrome might be showing up in your business without you realizing it. Firstly, 212 00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:33,320 overworking and constantly putting pressure on yourself to do more. Next, not 213 00:15:33,440 --> 00:15:37,159 valuing your expertise, letting others step into the spotlight, and holding yourself back. 214 00:15:37,679 --> 00:15:41,799 Over teaching and way over delivering in all of your courses, programs and 215 00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:46,600 webinars, saying yes when you want to say no, and not having boundaries 216 00:15:46,639 --> 00:15:52,120 with clients, self sabotaging any good opportunities that come your way. And then 217 00:15:52,240 --> 00:15:56,559 lastly, perfectionism. All right, I don't know if you can resonate with 218 00:15:56,679 --> 00:16:00,279 any of those. If you can, yet you're not alone. And if 219 00:16:00,320 --> 00:16:03,759 you have any friends who think might be dealing with some of these things, 220 00:16:03,879 --> 00:16:07,559 hit the share button pop this episode over to them because it's how I get 221 00:16:07,559 --> 00:16:10,679 to help more people. And if you haven't already subscribed to the show, 222 00:16:10,799 --> 00:16:14,879 hit the subscribe button so you can get brand new episodes straight to your podcast 223 00:16:14,879 --> 00:16:18,279 app of choice every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Thank you so much 224 00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:19,639 for listening. Catch you next time.