Adventist Radio London. Inspiration for the song We Welcome the Talking Point with Ray
Sen Pedro Angeler discussing the hot topics and answering your questions, Saturdays five to
seven pm on Adventist Radio London. It's talking Point, It's Talking Point,
It's talking Point, it's Talking Point conversations you need to have. One of
my favorite from Maverick City Great is your Faithfulness to Me, and the song
is actually called Promises. Well, welcome to another edition of Talking Point.
It feels like it's been a long while since we've been live. We've had
a few recordings going and I'm hoping that you've been able to to stay with
us, stay connected, and I'm hoping you will stay with us this afternoon.
There's a deep conversation ahead, a relevant conversation ahead as always, and
leading out the conversation is Alison a Wuku, no stranger to Talking Point,
no stranger to Arl. In fact, I've called her our honorary Talking Point
member. Whether she knows this or not, whether she's agreed to or not,
I'm not sure, but she will be coming to sort of lead us
in a conversation as part of the series Breaking or bringing down strongholds. If
you remember, we started this series at the top of the year and I
thought it was an excellent series to start. Then as we approached the new
year, we were talking about the strongholds that were, you know, we
fight on a daily basis, and some of the topics that we discussed and
fleshed out were anxiety, stress, and worry, depression, self esteem.
And we've had excellent feedback. We've had people saying, you know what,
they want to connect with Alison. I'm sure she's had a few people coming
and connecting with her on that front. Persons who've wanted the recordings, you
can find them on spreaker dot com if you've missed any. In fact,
if you want to revisit any of those, you can find them on spreaker
dot com. And any of our conversations really are on that platform. So
we're looking to deep, to dig a little deeper into the topic dealing with
trauma, and that is because we acknowledge that On June twenty seventh, it
was PTSD that's post traumatic stress stress Disorder Awareness Day. That's a mouthful.
Let's say it again. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Awareness Day. On June twenty
seventh and our discussion. Our topic today is dealing with trauma. I am
hoping I've got Angie on the line. I think she's dropping on and off
having Wi Fi Internet connections, so we're hoping that she will be able to
join the conversation. As always, you can join us in the usual fashion
studio at Adventist Radio dot London, or you can text us eight triple two
eight hope and then space and your message, or you can WhatsApp zero seven
four or five nine six four two eight nine eight. I'm hoping you're hearing
me clearly and hearing myself, so I'm hoping you are. If you aren't,
also let me know and I can adjust you know, the volume and
the mics here in studio. Let's just have a quick prayer and then we
can launch into our discussion. Dear Heavenly Father, we thank you for bringing
us together again for another relevant conversation. We pray that you would be with
us. Be with the technology. I know that Angie's trying to connect.
Make that possible. Their Lord, be with our listeners, especially those who
may be facing and dealing with the issue of trauma. Help us prepare us
and power us in Jesus' name. Amen and Amen, Right, Alison,
it looks like it's just us. We're gonna have to hold the fort until
Angie connects. I see that there are a few people on the platform,
so oh, Angie's as well, so let's see if I can get her
to come through. And we've got someone on Justina. Justina is is Pedro's
sister, and I think she caught the fire and thought she would listen in.
So Justina, thank you very much for doing so. I'm not going
to share the zoom details since we are one down at the moment as another
commitment, but like I said, you can be part of the conversation in
the usual fashion by connecting with us via the studios contact details, okay,
and Jim getting a little bit of feedback from your end. I'm not sure,
maybe because yes, you've got two devices going, so that might be
why hello. Yeah, yes, okay, then I think I'm rooted one,
so you you decide. Okay, now, worries right, So,
as I said, we're talking trauma this afternoon, and it's the conversation led
by Alisson, author and psychotherapist, and as I said, no stranger to
talking point, Allison, how are you doing and welcome back to the program.
Thank you so much for accepting our invitation. As always, thank you
so much, Sanya. I'm doing good. It's a beautiful sunny afternoon where
I am. Yes, yes, I am doing good. Thank you.
It's good to be here, so thank you for having me back. Lovely.
Yeah, you've highlighted that it's it's summer. Summer has come at last.
I thought i'd missed it, but because at one point I was putting
back on my heating, I don't know if anybody else was, but it's
finally here and it's it's come with all its glory. In fact, a
few days ago I thought, well, be careful what you asked for,
Zenya. But it's mellowed out a little bit, cool down a little bit,
and it's definitely a pleasant afternoon here in London, and I hope it
is wherever you are. Angie, how are you Welcome to the conversation.
How are you doing? How was your week? I'm good and yeah,
thank you. Sorry so and a few technical difficulties there surrounded by devices,
but hopefully I just want to be working. But yeah, I'm good.
I've actually had a week off work this week so and whilst I say on
a week off, I had lots of things to do and probably didn't get
as much done as I wanted to, but I did life happening, everything
else you don't get a chance to do when you're working full time, and
sometimes don't know how people manage it. But it was nice. Obviously we've
had some really good weather, so I've been able to enjoy some of that.
So yeah, and today it's been a beautiful subburth day. I'm apparently
really hot, which I shouldn't really complain about, but they're just like,
oh, there's never had quite the right breeze and at the time and stuff.
But I certainly can't complain it's best day so far. We shouldn't really.
It's a point, a very British thing to be. In fact,
if Pedgure was here, he'd say the same thing, you know. That's
that's all we talk about. It seems the weather and we're either it's either
too hot or too cold, too rainy, I don't know, but we
we are blessed to be alive and we're thankful whatever the weather. Indeed,
uh, my week up and down, I don't know if anyone else has
noticed. But life for me is compartments. There there is the professional,
the personal. You know, there's family, there's my parenting relationship, my
marriage relationship. And I've found that over the years there's there's never completeness,
like there's always one compartment. Whenever I managed to put the pieces together in
that compartment, something else will go completely. You know, chaos will will
will will rain. And I suppose that is God's way of keeping me on
my knees. I don't know if I commit to being on my knees,
if things are going well, he'll He'll agree to that. But whenever I
sought one thing out, something else seems to to four spectaclely apart. And
at the moment I'm working at well, wherever I'm working, there seems to
be some issues and I'm trying to figure my way through them. So I'm
soliciting prayers because it's it's not always easy to make decisions. Sometimes difficult decisions
have to be made, Sacrifices have to be made. I would love to
do ministry full time, but it's the nine to five that pays the bills,
so I have to do that. I have to turn up on a
Monday morning. But I know God is able, He's able, he can
do all things, and I'm putting everything into his most capable hands. So
up and down week, but yeah, grateful for the Sabbath, and I'm
really looking forward to the conversation. It might be a timely conversation for me
to be fair and for so many but if not, it's definitely good to
keep these on record, you know, keep them somewhere because if you don't
need them today, you may need them tomorrow. And of course it ma
not being new information to you, but it's good to have refreshers. It's
good to hear it again something you may have overlooked, to be fair.
So I'm really looking forward to the conversation. The conversation today, Yeah,
Alison, as I promised, it's about twenty one minutes fast, and I
know time flies, so I'm going to hand it over to you so that
you can start the discussion for us bringing down strongholds, dealing with trauma.
Okay, thank you so much, Senya. So for anyone who is on
zoom, I'm actually sharing sides, so I'm going to be talking from slides.
But hopefully I was taken away that you know, for those listening and
if you're not, you're not actually looking at the sides. Hopefully, hopefully
you'll be able to follow the conversation as well and hopefully be able to join
in as well. So just by way of recap, like Zenya said,
this is a series. This is part of a series of conversations that we've
been having. We started at the start of the year and I think we
had four in January, and I think it's timely now to have this conversation
around trauma and PTSD seeing us. I think Zaanya said the Friday, I
think Friday was yesterday, So there's a there's a focus on on PTSD on
trauma. So we're gonna be talking about a topic which is quite heavy.
You know, if you do need any if you if you need to talk
just briefly, please do text. I think there's number that you can text
too, and I can. I can leave my email or contact and please
feel free to contact me. I do appreciate this. This can trigger people,
and if you find it a bit too much, please do take do
take time away and you know, get some ice cream or walk around or
you know, find a way to soothe yourself because I'm aware that you know
this is a subject that can trigger some people and if you're really struggling,
please do text. I think Senya will share a number. In fact,
can I share it again Allison, and also we'll share it as we progress
through the program. It is zero seven four five nine six four two eight
nine eight. That's the WhatsApp number. Obviously you can text eight triple to
eight hope space and give that detail as well. All email studio at Adventist
Radio dot London and we'll also give some resources throughout the program that you can
tap into as well. Thank you so much, Senya. So just by
way of overviews, so so you know what we're talking about today, we'll
just do a quick recap looking at what strongholds are and then we'll delve into
looking at what trauma is and the types of trauma, and then we'll have
look at we'll talk about the how trauma can manifest itself in people, so
you can you know, people can behave in certain ways that may not be
immediately ident identified as trauma, but underline that it's likely that you know it's
as a result of trauma that occurred at some point in their lives, and
then we'll have looked at trauma as a stronghold, and then we'll have look
at how we bring down the stronghold of trauma and how we can support other
people as well. So that's just an overview of what the discussion is going
to look like or be sound like today. So just by way of recap,
throughout the series bringing down strongholds and the text that has been a key
focus has been from Second Corinthians, Chapter ten, verses three to five.
Second second Corinthians ten versus three to five, and it rates for though we
walk in the flesh, we do not war against the flesh. For the
weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty in God, for pulling
down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exhorts itself against the
knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.
The Book of Corinthians was written by the apostle Paul, and when he talks
about when he was talking about strongholds from a spiritual perspectic, but he likened
it to like a fortress. So what is a stronghold in physical terms?
It's like a mighty fortress. It's a fortified place. It's a place that
you can normally has very high walls, it's normally quite fortified. But when
we talk about it from a spirit spiritual perspective, we're talking about a place
where a particular cause or belief is strongly of health. We're talking about the
mind, and we're talking about worlds of resistance in the mind. And we're
talking about strongholds in a negative context, because strongholds can be positive where it's
God who is the stronghold. But in this context, we're talking about where
the enemy puts the strongholds in our minds. And this is in the form
of arguments raised against the truth, the character and the knowledge of God.
So essentially it's a portrait of lies in the mind. And this can actually
be things that are true or factual, but then not everything that's true or
patrol is the truth as is as in aligned with the Word of God.
So you know, things can be true that they may not necessarily be the
truth. Anything that's an obstacle to our wholesome purpose, growth and fulfillment in
life is a stronghold and it does hold us captic. So why are we
doing this series we're doing the series because we want everybody. We want people
to be able to experience abundant living, and we know that price set in
Junte chapter ten, verse ten, I have come that you may have life
and have it more abundantly. So looking at the subject of trauma, what
actually is trauma? So trauma is actually an event or a series of events,
or a set of circumstances that is experienced by an individual as physically or
emotionally harmful or life threatening and has lasting adverse effects effects on the individual's functioning
and mental, physical, social, emotional, or spiritual wellbeing. The effects
have got to be lasting. So where a person simply cannot cope with a
situation and that leaves them in a state of extreme fear or anxiety over a
prolonged period of time, that's that that really is a truth. It's a
trauma, and will will have a look at how that happens or what happens
within in the brain when the trauma happens. So generally speaking, traumas can
happen as a result of kind of like physical halm, mental harm, or
a destruction of some sort. So say for example, there's a war or
where there's a threat of imminent death. So say, for example, there's
a car accident or something and you think, oh my goodness, I think
this is it. I'm going to die. So what what how does actually
affect the brain? So let's remember that the brain is the powerhouse of the
body, and there's a lot that goes on in the brain. And essentially
the effects that we experience from a trauma as a result of that incident or
that situation really adverst the impacting parts of the brain. And the key parts
of the brain that are impacted are, first of all, what we call
the prefrontal cortext and the prefrontal cortext is responsible for rational thinking in the brain.
It's the part of the brain where we call the that we call the
executive functioning of the brain. It's responsible for making decisions, for you know,
making choices, and it also is responsible for regulating emotions that we that
we feel, so things like fear, things like anxiety. It regulates those
emotions. Now, when we soffer trauma or when we suffer from PTSD,
the effectiveness of the prefrontal cortest cortext is significantly reduced, so we're not able
to make decisions as rational rationally as we would normally be able to. We're
not able to regulate our emotions as effectively as we would normally be able to.
So the other part of the brain that's affected is that is what we
call the amid dealer. Now, the amid dealers an almond sized part of
the brain that's located towards the back of the head. It's so it's quite
small and that it's very powerful. It's wired for survival, and this is
the part of the brain that we call the alarm the alarm system. So
when when we sense that there's a level of thread in our environment, that
part of the brain kind of kicks off and sends message is to other parts
of the body to glance in the body, and then we produce adrenaline and
cortisol. But when that's over effective, the adrenaline and corticol is released in
very high amounts and that can be detrimental to us. So then we become
quite hyperactive. Then we become quite hyper vigilant, and then we become the
anxiety levels actually arise, and the prefrontal cortex that we've just talked about,
which is the rational part of the brain starts to shut down because we start
to think that there's the danger that we have to address. We either have
to fight back or flight or freeze to protect ourselves. So the amid dealer
is hyperactive, the prefrontal cortex becomes less effective than it should be. The
other part of the brain that gets impacted is the part of the brain that
we call the hippocampus, and the hypocampus is responsible for kind of storing memory
and being able to tell the difference between the past and the present. So
it works to remember and make sense of anything that happens us, including trauma.
But when we are exposed to trauma consistent a consistent on a consistent basis,
then the hypo campus actually shrinks in the brain and so its ability to
tell the difference between the past and present is diminished. So then what that
means in terms of trauma is that we have the incidents played back in our
minds as though it's happening in the present, because the functioning of the hippo
campus is impaired. So those are the really I mean, other parts of
the body do get impacted, but those are the parts of the brain.
So that's the biology and that's the science behind what's happening with trauma. So
when somebody experiences a trauma, what are the effects what happens as a result
of all of those things that are happening or not happening in the brain.
We have things like, you know, emotional overwhelmed because the prefrontal cortex is
not able to regulate the emotions as it normally should be able to. We
have things like flashbacks and nightmares because the hypocampus is not able to tell the
difference between the past and the present, and so the past is playing back
what happens as if it's happening in the present. And obviously we have things
like what's something else numbing? You know, we just sometimes unable to connect
with any emotions because the emotional part of the brain is not functioning. But
you know, whatever is happening in the brain is impacting us from an emotional,
physical, spiritual perspective. So in addition to all of those things that
we experience as a direct effect of what's happening in the brain, we will
experience things physically like panic attacks. We become hyper vigilant, and you know,
we have high, very high levels of anxiety. We might think bout
having a heart attack, we can't cope. We have things like self disruptive
behaviors because we're just trying to escape from the pain. We might abuse substances
or things like eating disorders, or we might become depressed or very irritable,
losing interest in the things that we normally enjoy. Copelessness, we might dissociate
from what's happening around us, hype of vigilance, little or non memories.
Because our people campus is affected, we might experience feelings of shame, self
hatred builds. I mean, there's so much chronic pain, headaches because when
we have too much adrenaline and cortisol going on because the amid dealer has been
kind of triggered, then we have too much of the chemicals that we don't
need in the body, and that actually causes us to have maybe our heart
baits faster, we have headaches, we have chest pains, or we have
kind of somatic adverse experiences. So the effects of trauma are really really wide
ranging, and anything that affects us mentally is also likely to affect us physically
as well as emotionally and as well as spiritually. So types of trauma.
We talked about this being kind of PTSD awareness weak or period. But we
have what we call simple PTSD and we have complex PTSD. Now, simple
PTSD really normally is related to just one single event, but that's kind of
quite a big significant thing that happens. So say, for example, there's
a car accident, or there's a there's a hurricane and that's kind of very
destructive, or somebody experiences sexual assault. All of those things can be a
single event that has very high impact on our mental and emotional wellbeing. And
some of the symptoms of simple PTSD could include things like nightmares, flashbacks,
negative kind of cognitions, aggression, and avoidance. Avoidance is a big one
because what we try to do is we try to avoid anything connected to that
event, maybe the location of the event, maybe anything that sounds like anything
that sounded at the time the event happened, any smell that's kind of similar
to when that event happens. So that simple PTOs is say what we normally
call that is trauma with a big TA because it's a one time event but
it's quite significant. But then we also have complex trauma, and complex trauma
is related to prolonged or repeated trauma, and that can develop after abuse over
a long period of time, or neglect over a long period of time.
It could be over months, it could be over years. We call that
trauma with a small TA And sometimes this is trauma that people don't People actually
normally can be quite dismissive about this trauma. They can say, well,
oh well, don't worry about it. You know, don't worry about that
child in the playground who tried to believe you. It's not a big deal.
But if you know, if neglect or abuse is occurring, even on
a small scale over a long period of time, that eventually becomes quite complex
and becomes PTSD as well. And you know, there are a lot of
people with things like some personality disorders and some additional mental health problems, so
depression, anxiety, but in addition things like eating disorders, things like psychosis
and schizophrenia. Those more complex mental health problems can be as a result of
complex PTSD. PTSD so some of the symptoms could include difficulty in regulating our
emotions. You know. Sometimes I don't know, people can say I can
go from zero to eight hundred very quickly. I find it very difficult to
find a way to soothe myself, to regulate my emotions. Sometimes people can
be very impulsive and normally people who are kind of maybe suicidal or self coming
can have a background of complex PTSD. People may have trouble sleeping as well
because of the nightmares, flashbacks of past experiences, and you know, we
have to remember that trauma brings up memories involuntarily, so we don't necessarily plan
to think about certain things. Sometimes we get fragments of historical experiences involuntarily,
and sometimes that's very difficult, and it can cause a lot of problems with
sleep. And as a result, a lot of people have chronic physical health
problems chest pains, headaches, things that would be investigated, and the medics
would find it very difficult to actually diagnose anything physically that some of that could
be as a result of the complex trauma. And then the obvious things like
self hate, people with having poor memory and difficulties trusting people, hostility,
relational difficulties are all kind of consequences of complex trauma as well. So how
is trauma manifested? Like we've kind of mentioned before, anxiety people become hyper
vigilant because the part of the brain that's the alarm system. Raises an alarm,
we think that there's a threat in the environment all the time after experiencing
either simple PTSD or complex PTSD, and so we become quite fearful and we
become quite edgy and quite vigilant. So anxiety is normally a byproduct of PTSD
as well. So emotional pain or discomfort that doesn't get dealt with is normally
buried. So I have on the screen a picture of an iceberg, and
you know, normally anger that we see is normally secondary emotion when it comes
to trauma, the primary emotions are buried under the iceberg. So if we
know about the icebergs, will know that most of it is normally submerged and
underwater. And then what we see is just like a tenth of the iceberg.
And what we're seeing with anger is just this secondary emotion, but underneath
the anger. Normally, when people have like experienced PTSD, either simple or
complex PTSD, it's a lot of maybe guilds, a lot of shame,
feelings of abandonment, feelings of sadness, feeling offended, be humiliated, trapped,
jealous, may be insecure, defeated, lonely, confused, nervous,
manipulated, disconnected, So you name it feeling belittled. If you've been neglected,
if you've been abused over a long period of time, it's quite likely
that you will experience one or more of these emotions if they're not addressed,
If you if we don't recognize them for what they are and say, well,
this is quite traumatic. This must have made you feel sad, This
must have made you feel helpless or lonely or maybe betrayed. If we don't
address and validate those feelings, they don't they don't just go away. We
carry them unconsciously around and they will manifest as anger. So sometimes when we
when we feel angry out of proportion to what's just happened, it might be
that we are being triggered by a memory that's quite traumatic. And then obviously
depression. Depression is another way in which trauma is manifested. Again, if
we think about the iceberg iceberg theory, we see depression at the top of
the at the tip of the iceberg, but actually underneath are probably feelings of
maybe guilt, maybe emptiness, maybe anxiety, anger, numbness, all of
those things. Are happening. You know, betrayal, you know, our
helplessness. All of those emotions you know, if they're not addressed, will
make us feel depressed eventually, so I will. I think that's quite a
fair bit of information. I think we'll take it pause there and when we
come back, we'll talk about trauma as a strong fold back to your saying
thank you, Alison. I'm busy scribbling, as I have been throughout the
series. I feel like I've gone to sort of a biology lesson. It's
really full and rich, and again, thank you so much for me and
Agie. I'm not sure if you've got any questions or any comments, and
just enough, please feel free. If you don't want to come onto the
mic, then pop your question on the message and we will share that with
Alison or the rest of our listeners. But for me, Alison, what
struck me in what you've just said is how far reaching the effects of trauma
can be. And I don't know if I'm jumping ahead. I probably am,
and you'll come to that, but for me, it's how will one
know that what is manifesting, what's above water, as it were, based
on your analogy, is because of trauma because there's so many other things that
could be going on. Or is it always trauma if I'm if I'm depressed,
if I'm if I am struggling with sleep, if I can't moderate my
anger and my emotions. Is there always an underlying traumatic event that maybe I
haven't really sort of discovered or focused on. Is that at what point then
do I? Or is at this point that I go to the doctor or
to to you know, a therapist and so forth and try to unpack what
might be going on with me. So does that make sense? It does?
It does absolutely. So what you're trying to do is look for the
tell tale signs like this is actually as a result of trauma, not not
just anything else. So I'd just like to say that every every behavior has
a has a root and has a function, and it's likely that you know,
it's as a result topic trauma, or it's likely that it's as a
result of something else. But how we know is we can think of,
right, the way in which I'm behaving, is it proportionate to actually the
situation, the circumstances around me. Now, if there's an overreaction, then
it's wise to think, Okay, when was the last time when it's another
time that I felt this way and another time that I felt this way,
because that could lead you to a traumatic situation. And how was that handle?
How was that address? How did I feel at that time? Did
I feel like really threatened? Did I feel like my life was in danger?
Did I feel completely helpless? Do I have flashbacks about this situation?
Is there any situation in my life that I have difficulties kind of moving on
from because I have things that just bring but either the whole memory or bits
of memory, because you know, some of these very strong reactions, it's
likely that that connected to something else in the past. Otherwise your response would
be proportionate to the situation at hand. So by yourself you can you can
do a bit of kind of analysis. However, if you arrive at the
point where you think, oh, there's something in my past that's and you
know, what happens is a lot of people just try to get on,
just just keep going, depending on the culture. For some cultures are very
much for you know, just keep going, You're going to be okay or
pray about it is going to be fine. But we have to understand that,
you know, when it comes to trauma, there are things that are
happening in your brain as part of a natural process because something's gone wrong.
It's not you not wanting to move on, it's your brain playing back information
because the hippocampus has not been able to function and store things as memory.
The frontal cortex is not able to regulate the emotions as it should. So
I think it's you know, as human beings, we are integrated beings.
We're integrated with our present and our past are quite integrated, so it's really
really important. But we look out for the connections in our history or in
our earlier or significant experiences because it's likely that those experiences are triggers. And
you know, what's happening in the year and now is triggering memories from what's
happening. So if your response is disproportionate to the situation at hand, then
I'd say you need to investigate a bit more by just reflecting when another time
I felt this way. And if you're consciously and intentionally trying to avoid you
know, reflecting or thinking of that thing that's happening in the past, because
avoidance is one of the really big symptoms of PTSD, then you know that
it's likely that this trauma in the But then at that point you need to
go to it like mental health professional or go to a GP to get referred
to a mental health professional and get yourself assessed for trauma. There are quite
specific assessments for PTSD. Yeah, and when you as you're talking, I'm
thinking that these cases may more relate to those small teas that you're talking about.
If it's a catastrophic or a very big tea, then you may be
able to pinpoint what has caused this. But it's those small teas, you
know, the abuse as a child by your father or whatever, or sexual
abuse or that kind of those kinds of certain stances that might manifest themselves.
And you know, you may be in a relationship and you're not sure why
you're responding to your husband or your wife that when it could be those underlying
issues. Absolutely, it's it's like a chain reaction, and you know,
and I just I just want to highlight that abuse is not always active.
You know, abuse can be very passive. So if you know, if
you're emotionally unavailable to your child or this neglect, you can give them all
of the designer shoes and foods but they need. But you know, I
mean it's the truth because you know, I think often, you know,
we live in society where we think, but what's the problem. I give
you everything you need, but you know, fundamentally we need the emotional availability
of the people who are who God has entrusted to look after us. And
I think essentially that's what offers the security and the confidence and the ability to
trust and get by in life. And if that's consistently missing, that that
is a traumatic experience because that's not the natural design. Oh that's a powerful
word right there, Angie. I noticed you dropped out. I'm not sure
what you've missed and what you've caught, But do you have a question at
the point, I guess that it's funny because when I was thinking about this,
I mean, I guess now because in terms of the work that I
do, what have you have an aware as of awareness of PTSD. But
I always remember when I think back equating PTSD with something that was linked with
war veterans. I never really kind of thought of it in terms of something
that your average everyday person could suffer from. It was something that and obviously
that's linking into the kind of big traumas of war, what have You'd hear
that kind of use quite a lot. So it's really interesting now we see
again this is where our awareness months and days and weeks with red you come
in handy as it were, because I never really recognized I'm saying that on
reflection that PTSD was kind of a thing, that it's a disorder that you
know, people can can be suffering from. And I guess also, I
guess I wanted to then find out with that in terms of sort of numbers,
in terms of how prevalent PTSD is, because would would with your average
person recognize that's what they're going through and equate it to that or possibly not,
because obviously you're talking about some of these symptoms and we can kind of
link those to lots of other things. Possibly how with somebody been apart from
going to obviously a professional, you would necessarily know that's what you're experiencing.
So I kind of wonder, you know how prevalent it is in terms of
numbers man people you know, and is it something that's seen more in women
or in men, or is it kind of numbers by split quite even?
I should say, I mean, I can say set definitely, Angie that
we're saying more and more and more of it, and you know what we
used to kind of see us just maybe anxiety in the past or you know,
or depression in the past. Actually, more and more people are being
kind of diagnosed with PTSD, so it's quite it's quite prevalent. I acologies
haven't looked up the data before before before the show, But there's no particular
group of people that it impacts more than others, men, women, children,
everybody. I think I would say typically at least at least seventy percent
of clients I see have some trauma in their in their narrative. Whether or
not we actually where on the trauma is it's another thing. But you know,
it's very easy to identify, and you know, let's just remember especially
depression. Depression is one of those illnesses that is co mobid with things like
trauma and other things like low SELVI esteem. But how do these things come
about. It's normally something's happened in some of this past that has had a
huge impact on them, either on a consistent on a over a period of
time or as a one time event. So you know, trauma, trauma,
is actually very prevalent, unfortunately, and and it's something that you know,
if you think, if you if you suspect that you've got PTSD,
it needs professional help to treat. It's not one of those things that you
can just say, I'm just gonna, you know, do some exercise.
We need to systematically follow a protocol or a where your treatment and safely right,
because a lot of people who are experiencing a type of PTSD are not
safe at all, feel very unsafe, and there is a high potentially higher
risk associotypic traumas or higher risk of harming themselves of harming other people as well.
And following off with that, would you say that you know, a
lot of mental health disorders and difficulties, there's a lot of stigma surrounding it.
Is that quite similar with PTSD? Or you know, because I was
kind of wonder people may experience a traumatic event and not really think depending on
what it is, may not think much of it. They kind of say,
right, I've got to get back to normal or to get back to
st what I'm doing, and even though they may be struggling, may not
actually go and seek help for whatever. Woman's one hundred and one reasons I'm
sure. So I wonder if there's still this sort of there is a stigma
around it as well, you know, saying where that maybe there are for
some other disorders. There is there is stigma, not in the sense that
people think, well, I've got trauma, so I mean, I feel
embarrassed about it. There's stigma because they don't name it right, they don't
necessarily name it as trauma. I think there's less stigma around the simple PTSD
because everyone understands that. You know, if you're in a car accident or
a close member of your family passes away, that's quite a difficult experience.
So you know, the stigma there is less where there's more stigmas around the
complex trauma. And that even makes it more complex because people are not willing
to kind of disclose. They would see it as a sign that they're not
resilient enough, or they have very little self worth or self esteem, and
so the riddles with shame, with guilt, They doubt whether they are even
entitled to feel that way. And you know, we'll see later on when
I talk about supporting people with trauma. I'm just gonna say it now that
it's very important that we identify it as trauma. We call it by name
rather than saying, oh, you know it was your upbringing or because that
then really makes it very dismissive. But we actually identify it as the trauma
so that people can feel empowered to be able to do something to address it.
So it's not so that the stigma is not around the fact that trauma
is a terrible thing to have experienced. The stigma is around the fact that
people are worried about how they would be seen as not being able to cope,
or maybe not being spiritual enough or prayer full enough. But it's it's
quite sad, right because you know these symptoms you can't you can't actually help
them. You know, the things that happen to you, they are not
things that you make happen. Yeah, yeah, and that's true. Right.
I am going to take a short break, let that settle in,
sink in with our listeners, with ourselves, and then we'll come back and
continue. There's a question also, Yes, there's a question that's been asked
by our and by Justina. She's saying, if a person didn't receive emotional
support from their parents as a child, and the child grows to be an
adult and the adult is aware of it and wants to change. Would the
adult that need counseling to be able to learn how to change and how to
provide emotional support to their children, their own children. I think you touched
a little bit on that. Yes, I mean, yes, it's sometimes
if a person didn't receive emotional support from their parents, but then find as
they go through life, find an environment that's quite validating and quite supporting.
So maybe later on in life from their teach child or mentor or something that
are close to maybe their auntie, uncle, extended family, that can actually
repair the wounds, depending on how effective that that relationship is, that can
build a secure attachment. So, you know, the lack of emotional support
from parents obviously ends up in an insecure attachment, and you know there's all
sorts of problems that come with people being insecurely attached. But you know,
it doesn't mean that if we had an insecure attachment at childhood, were always
going to be insecurely attached, because we could later in life meet people who
are very loving, very supportive, very validating, and that could actually help
us grow in our confidence and enable us to have the tools to be able
to give that to other people as well. But you know, sometimes we
don't always notice some of the impacts of this lack of support, and some
of the impacts could be unnoticed until we actually start to have children ourselves,
and then we start to realize, oh, actually I was really affected by
this. I don't actually really know how to give the love and affection to
my own children in that in that If that's the case, then please do
get some child's counseling, seek some help, speak to somebody who understands attachments
and works with adverirst childhood experiences, and make sure that you get some help,
because that child, that little girl, that little boy who didn't get
that support needs to be reparented in a way that they can feel validated and
conflict because they will need to give that to their children. And you can't
give what you don't have. So if you notice at any point that you
don't feel equip but that there will say void earlier on in life, then
please to get the help. You owe it to yourself to get that help.
Wonderful, Thank you, Alison, thank you for the question. And
obviously that just speaks to how we need to. I mean, I can't
drive the point home enough. We need to get the help that we need.
We need to seek support. We can't suffer in silence if nothing else.
That's what I hope people take away from this program that we are able
to and we can. There's no shame in it, you know, if
you need help, get the help, because we need to stop these cycles.
If I'm a parent and I haven't had the love and the connections that
I needed to have as a child, I can't give it. Then the
cycle continues, doesn't it. I then raise a child who doesn't have that
support and won't be able to give it. And you know it's generations and
the consequence is long lasting. So if we need the help, and I
speak to our men as well, who are very I mean, Alison,
I know you said that there's a you know, there's no real difference in
who comes and who's asking. But we know that our men sometimes shy away
from I mean, even the common common cold or whatever they may have.
They don't want to go to the tor about moreover, you know, serious
issues that they may be dealing with and dealing with in silence. So we
want to just reiterate, please please seek the support that you need. All
right, I'm going to take a break. We're going to hear from ORLANDA.
Adams. The battle is the Lord's. I'm going to also play the
Cornerstone Counseling Service adverts. So if you want to make a note of that
number, that's a resource as well that you can tap into. What are
you trying to say? Your line and look forget about all that other junk.
This battle ain't yours. It's all make them out and then so shout
help me say no pay Jesus kid, feed therest book heart that he can
died. He all things w yes, they do according to the fastest purpose.
And this whole you will your madala, you and balcony I'm going through.
Remember the god of the wolves a chance to use it for the battle.
He is not a gets the boat. We're gonna tell the hello that
all right, that's no sadiness. Jesus cann sid that the pister is not
able and willing to hate. Remember that rule there. They're not gonna be
all good, but they shall on recording to God's purpose and his call medal.
No matter what you're going with, Broom the timber. God sees all
that it knows as all it wants to do is choose you. Oh dispatch
honess it notes, it's instance. It's the law, if not the laws
God, And think you got a hold feel head, had you belong to
the most men. You don't need fur. It's the wall, it's the
body. Say, no matter what you're going through, her piper is gonna
be Aura. He's just choosing no matter what you're happen to go through.
Man with pimper, this will be a memo for God is only choosing it.
It's not to have babe. You got to knowing your hot no matter
what comes, no matter what, don't he look he lock the battle.
It's not you. He be the tres approaching nice God. I'm like,
you got to hold up, hold down, old, don't get up,
don't get don't get step out of step out, one step out on the
word. This song says, God's mercy kept me so I wouldn't let go
anybody in here ever felt like giving up, just throwing in the towel,
just giving up. I'm not going to ask you to hunt anybody, but
just look at him. That person you're looking at is here tonight only because
of God's mercy and his grace. Somebody only just tell God, thank you
for your mercy and your grace set kept me? Just a wait, God's
mercy capt me. Can I get a witness in here so I would cool?
I almost gave him most Okay, I must ride the edge of the
break. I couldn't see de really, but Jesus came and grabbed me,
and so God's mercy keptain. Gods mercy. Can I get a witness in
here that knows about God's grace? So I'm here today because of his grand
Come on, hunt somebody next to tell me I was really down. I
was really down. The devil really had but God's mercy kept me. I'm
here tonight because of God's mercy. Come on, no, just thank him,
just thank him. I oh that I felt my I just couldn't take
a life. You need more my problems handy down the question way down?
God? Tell me, so I wouldn't lift god percy, so I wouldn't
live all there can be? She did the same, girl, who yeah,
you you don't know what I can through and how I would Russia happen
is so far down that I didn't know who looks yeah, but all to
become a teach. That's the son of my mama. Talk yeah, yeah,
yeah. Are you struggling to cope with life? Conflict, bereavement,
fear, relationship, anger, depression, negative thoughts, trauma and uncertainty can
all cause emotional imbalance. Don't struggle alone. CCS, your trusted confidential Counseling
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CCS a shoulder to lean on. We are here to listen. Welcome back
to Talking Point and we're bringing down strongholds. Continuing the series with Alison A.
Waku and today we're dealing with trauma. Alison, Okay, thank you,
thank you. Xanya. So you know, we've looked at we did
a bit of a recap at the starts, and then we looked at what
trauma is. We looked at the two main types of trauma, simple PTSD
and complex PTSD, and we looked at how trauma is typically manifested as anxiety,
depression, anger. Now what we're going to talk about is trauma as
a stronghold. So the series is all about bringing down strongholds, and trauma
can be quite a detrimental. So, just by way of kind of grounding
ourselves as Christians, our central belief is based on a God whose nature is
love and whose purpose for each one of us is to live life fully and
more abundantly. And in the Bible as we know, as we've read in
the beginning, Christ said I have come that day that we may have life,
and that we might may have been more abundantly. So each one of
us has the capacity to experience the fullness of God's immeasurable love and abundant life,
and to experience his peace and bad love. However, however, unfortunately,
because we live in the fallen world, we live in a world of
sin. At some point we will all experience in violation or avoid that leads
to beliefs, thoughts, and feelings that hold us captive and form mental and
emotional strongholds. Having said that, no matter what we've been through or what
we've experienced, we don't have to be held captive. We have the weapons
to bring down strongholds, and I think that's amazing news. We can bring
down strongholds and experience abundant life through mental and emotional well being, and we
can be set free. Indeed, So how do we do that? First
of all, let's understand stronghold as trauma as a stronghold. So at the
start, we talked about a stronghold being like a fortified kind of fortress that
has very high walls. Now the walls if we think about the walls in
trauma as walls of lies. So the lies that keep us remain, keep
us in that state of vigilance of peer, of feeling threatened all the time.
It's really really important to remember that in order to know how to defet
a lie, we know we need to know the truth and price said in
John eight thirty two. Then you will know the truth, and the truth
will set you free. So how is that wrole of lies created in terms
of trauma in our minds when we kind of think things like I'm not good
enough, I'm not lovable, I'm not worthy, I'm detective, something's wrong
with me. On the back of some really bad experience so I don't know,
maybe abuse, maybe neglect, maybe bullying, can have us thinking these
things, having these thoughts amongst ourselves. And these thoughts are not true.
That you're not good enough is not true. That you're not lovable is not
true, that you're not worthy, that there's your defective Those are not true.
But if we carry on repeating those messages to ourselves, then essentially we're
building walls of lies in our minds, very big, tall walls of lies,
and then we remain within those walls, surrounded by the lies that we
keep repeating to ourselves. Another lie could be I'm always going to be limited
by my past and by my negative experiences, that somebody didn't look after me,
that I was physically or sexually assaulted, that's going to limit me for
the rest of my life. Those are lies that the enemies would like us
to believe. That's not true. Another lie could be, I am defined
by my past because my mother or father didn't look after me. That made
me unlovable. That defines me as on where they That defines me as less
than other people. That's not true. Another lie could be what happens in
the past will repeat itself. Something terrible is going to happen to me again
because that thing happened to me in the past, because I don't know my
house got burgled when I was in there, because somebody physically assaulted me.
That's going to happen again. Essentially, these are the walls of lies that
get built in our minds, especially when we have the flashbacks and we have
the nightmares and the memories play up over and over again. These are lies
that keep us in a place of trauma because we keep us in that strong
hole because we think, well, these things are going to happen, or
this is who I am, or I'm never gonna be able to achieve this.
So the walls of lies is how the trauma, the stronghold of trauma
is built. Then when we think about a fortress, we also think about
within the walls are towers. Are towers where you know, strategic planning things
happen so that we can you know, the people within the within the stronghold
can defeat the other people on the other side. So these towers we can
liken to our imagination. So we think of the walls of lies that get
built in our minds, and then we think of the towers of unhelpful imagination.
If we decide to focus on the pain, then we get defeated by
the trauma. If we decide to grow from the pain, then we defeat
the trauma. How to tower Towers of unhelpful imagination develop when we when we
think, oh, we're going to link things that have happened in the past
to our future. So because these things happened in the past, that's what's
going to happen in our future. We have to understand that we're not stagnant.
We're always growing, we're always moping as human beings, we're always becoming
something else. So unhelpful imagination will keep us in the fear of imagining fearful
things. Imagining things that provoke anxiety and fear is something that's kind of in
the past. Fear is not in the future. Fear has never seen the
future. Fear only knows the past. So when we link in our minds,
in our imagination the future to something that happened in the past that was
quite threatening, that was quite detrimental, then our imagination just gets built on
that, and that keeps us in a place of stronghold. Unhelpful imagination also
looks like avoiding, avoiding maybe an area avoiding a similar situation. Every time
we avoid something that reminds us of that trauma, what we're doing is reinforcing
the trauma. What we're doing is telling our minds that the safe thing to
do is to stay away from that thing, because if we come into contact
with anything that's similar to that thing, we are going to re experience that
trauma all over again. And that's just not true. So in avoiding,
we pure our imagination with the symptoms of the trauma. Another way that we
build ours of unhelpful imagination is by identifying with the pain, refusing to heal
from the pain. And actually some people actually feel comfortable in their pain.
Some people cannot imagine having any kind of significance outside of the pain, or
cannot imagine imagine not connecting with that pain. That pain becomes something that is
part and part of them, And sometimes you know, the secondary gains to
why they would do that, But that would keep people in a place of
If all you're imagining is being in this place of pain all the time,
and you decide that forms your identity, then trauma is going to become a
stronghold and I've just got here on this slide just not to say, be
mindful of how your environment and other external factors influence your imagination. What are
people telling you that that's kind of adding fuel to this unhelpful imagination. What's
happening in your environment that's adding fuel to this unhelpful imagination. And then when
we talk about strongholds as well, so we think about the tower with very
high walls, we think about also, you know, people strategies who are
within the tower. We think about the captains within the tower or within the
fortress, and we can liken the captains or the people who strategize with the
thoughts that we have in our minds. So the thoughts that we have in
our minds can hold us captive. So if we have thoughts like I cannot
you know, I can't cope with the pain, or there's no hope for
the future, I'm stuck in this place, or things like I'm better off
dead, if those are the thoughts that we entertain. Yes, we can't
always control what thoughts will come into our minds, but we can challenge the
thoughts that we have. We don't have to accept every thought that comes into
our mind So when the thought comes into our mind to say, well,
I'm better off dead, we can challenge the thought by saying, you know,
the Word of God says that He's got good plans for me, plans
to give me hope in the future. When the thought comes into the mind
that says you can't cope with the pain, you can challenge that with the
Bible says I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength,
or that God's our weakness. God's strength is made perfect in our weakness.
So let's not allow our thoughts to hold us captive. We cannot determine what
thought comes into our minds, but we can absolutely decide whether or not our
thoughts are going to control us, or whether we're going to control those thoughts.
Okay, So I don't know if people have any questions or any thought
to any comments before I go to how do we actually bring down the strongholds
of trauma? An any questions? It has come through at the moment,
So go on and then we'll pick up at the end. Okay, So
bringing down the strongholds of trauma, So how do we break free? I
think I might have said some of this before, So it's just by way
of recap. Take time to understand and validate your emotions. Challenging emotions need
to be processed and addressed. Not every emotion we have has a place in
our in our in our minds, or in us. But it's very important
that we identify the emotions we're experiencing rather than try to pretend we're not experiencing
those emotions. So validate the emotions because when we validate them, it's like
taking something out of the box and giving it life. Right, then we
can do something with it. But if we don't identify the emotions, and
if we don't validate how we're feeling, we're never going to be able to
heal because we're never going to be able to address those emotions. Believe only
God's truth, only the truth of God's words. Believe a word says about
you about your future, not what other people are saying. Other people might
say nice things, but they don't have the power to determine your future,
and other people the same people can equally say things that will end up being
quite traumatic. So you know, focus on God's truth. What the truth,
according to God, God's words says about you. Truth Like Jeremiah twenty
nine eleven. I know the plans I have for you, plants of good
are not of evil, to give you a future some one three nine.
You are fearfully and wonderfully made. God has amazing, amazing things to say
about us in his word. So focus on those things. Update your thoughts
to align to present facts and truth. You know, sometimes we remain our
thoughts remain in the past. So maybe that little girl or that little boy
who was told you know, you're stupid, or you're you're not going to
amount to anything in the future, that sort of thing. Sometimes we live
in the past of those thoughts that we need to look at ourselves here right
now and look at ourselves in terms of what can what God can do with
us, and think of ourselves in that way rather than in ways from the
past that we're very negative face, rather than avoid your peers. So we've
talked a bit about, like you know, one of peace in terms of
PTSDs avoidance. So sometimes people avoid mentally thinking of certain experiences or talking about
certain experiences and physically going back to certain places. So for example, you
know, if somebody had a car accident somewhere, avoiding that location, that
area altogether is something that's quite common. But that avoidance only reinforces the fear
only tells you, only tells the mind that you need to be afraid of
that place because if you go back there, an accident is going to happen.
That's not necessarily true. So we need to learn and that's you know,
this actually comes with treating PTSD. One of the ways that we treated
is by gradually exposing people to the thing that they try to avoid that's connected
with their trauma, because that's the way that we're going to learn the truth
about us and the difference between our past, our present, and our future.
So if you avoid the thing that makes you fearful, it's only going
to reinforce the fear. Second Timothing, Chapter one, verse seven says I
have not given you a spirit of fear, but of power, of love
and a sound mind. And of course I think we've touched on this.
Get professional help, Get professional help. Trauma is a complex mental health problem.
You might be able to think, oh, and you know, I
think the term trauma gets misused quite a bit, just like the term OCD
gets misused quite a bit. It is a serious mental health problem, and
so let's try not to underplay or underestimate the impact of PTSD. If people
feel that they have symptoms or signs of trauma, we need to try and
help them to get the help professionally that they need. Just remember you're not
your thoughts, and not everything that is true is the truth, okay.
Not everything that is true, not everything that you see around, Not everything
that is intellectual is intelligent. Not everything that is true is the truth.
Okay. I think I'm going to put that on my status. Not everything
that's intellectual is intelligent. I love that. Sorry before you continue outs,
and let me just remind persons of how they can be part of the conversation.
They can email studio at Adventist Radio dot London, or they can text
eight triple to eight hope space and then your message, your question, your
comment, or you can WhatsApp zero seven four or five nine six four two
eight nine eight, thank you, thank god, that's a question as well.
Actually, just pulling on a bit your you were saying about the word
trauma cannot be often misused. I guess I was thinking because my word question
was going to be, what are some of the disconceptions that you would say
would need to be addressed with PTSD especially, And that's just as you've said
that, I thought, okay, actually it's well as words that could be
banded around without thoughts sometimes or you utilizing it like the word is sometimes depression.
You mentioned trauma before as well. Yeah, I mean I have heard
a lot of people say, oh my goodness, that that that was trauma,
that that that's my PTSD, or that's trauma. Honestly, you know,
in context, that's like completely not aligned with actual trauma. I was
driving home from church today and I happened to take a route that I don't
normally take. In a split second, I made a decision to go straight
rather than exit. I made a decision to exit to a main motorway towards
my house rather than harry on, and then I was hit with traffic.
It was like, you know, between my church and my home, it's
it's twenty five minutes under half an hour journey. It took me two hours
to get home. And I was saying to I was saying to my children,
that's traumatic, but that's not actually traumatic. And I'm then I,
well, I'm going to talk about traubat and honestly, that's just that's just
a horrible experience. That's just not a nice experience. I don't like sitting
in traffic, but I'm part of the traffic as well, and everyone's sitting
there going where is everyone going? And I was thinking, just because there's
a bit of sunshine doesn't mean everyone's got to be out, And I just
thought, I've been in this car for two hours. But that's not traumatic.
I'm not gonna have any flashbacks. I'm not gonna I'm not really visit
that motor because of the traffic. I'm not going to be hyper vigilant because
of the traffic. But you know, that's it's just the context in which
people use trauma. Sometimes, when they've gone through an experience that's not very
pleasant, day to day experience that doesn't have the impact of they don't end
up having the symptoms of trauma, and then call it trauma. That just
minimizes what what trauma actually is and what people who experience trauma are actually going
through. Yeah, yeah, no, I hear that because it is Yeah,
And I mean, I guess it's I guess it's all relative, Like
you said about the context, And I suppose I mean, I suppose if
you were to define what trauma is. That's kind of an interesting one because
it's quite subjective. But like you said, from a disorder perspective, it's
like you said, however you want to describe that experience, it's not necessarily
it's actual trauma in that sense. So that because yeah, I don't think
of that that I probably just thought, yes, I probably experienced and said
use the words myself because maybe in that moment that's what it feels like.
But like you said, it's not necessarily and have the lasting effects. Yeah,
I can. I also and I don't know if this sort of contradicts
what you're saying or but at least it it will open up the discussion.
I was said. I remember when we spoke to we had the Cornerstone team
on, and I remember that very day, was on my way to the
station, and this is the example I used on the program. There was
a guy who was walking ahead of me and he was all upset because he
had to go and get milk very early in the morning for his family.
And he was, you know, swearing and going at it. You know,
I'm just at the house. It's early, it's cold, it's blah
blah, blah, and I have to go get this milk and lah blah
blahlahlah. And he was making such a big deal out of it. And
I remember mentioning that to the team and I said, you know what,
how can people how do we put things in perspective? Because trauma affects people
differently differently, and different experiences affect people differently, So you know, for
me, he looked like he was making a mountain out of a molehill.
He was making a big deal out of just going to the shop in the
morning, Go on and get the milk and go home, go on with
your life. But one of the counselors said, you know what, that's
probably what needs to happen there. But let's also think that maybe in his
childhood, you know, he was abused or beaten to go and get his
milk, get the milk for the family, or you know, whatever else
might be going on. So yes, I understand your point, and I
really appreciate it, but I want to also interject there that maybe because we
don't see it as traumatic, because we've got better coping mechanisms, And I
think maybe we'll go on to that because some people, you know, melt
down after you know, breaking a nail, and some people, you know,
it doesn't matter to them. So there are obviously some things within us
that make us better able to cope as opposed to others, and there are
other things that may trigger us that won't trigger others. Yeah, and there's
no doubt that you know, he probably had trauma somewhere in his in his
history of some time in his childhood or in his life. But the reality
is that going to get that milk and not being able to get that milk
is not a traumatic experience. So the symptoms of trauma or how you know,
trauma is being manifested through his disproportionate anger and irritability in that situation,
so that the trauma from that childhood or past experience is being manifested in that
way that he's not being traumatized by not to get the milk. I wasn't
traumatized by not being able to kind of come home in twenty five minutes or
you know, it's not a traumatizing experience. But yet, you know,
granted, yes, he's probably suffering from trauma that he's not or nobody else
has actually identified. They just think he's an angry angry man or or irrational
person or something along those lines. And I like how you've Yeah, in
fact, I like how you've said it. It is not necessarily what's happened,
it's his reaction to what's happened. And you've made that point at the
very beginning. If it's disproportionate, if you're behaving in a way that you
know you shouldn't, really you've reacted in a way that you shouldn't, then
those are the signals that say, Okay, there may be something underlying.
And I love how you've you've concluded on that. Yeah, Yeah, Yeah,
I think I think that point is very important because it just highlights that
there's a lot going on for people, and you know, be kind,
you know, and let's not be quick to judge people and assume because we
don't actually know what lies beneath the surface of what we see of a person.
Yes, another question I have, Alison, because I just brought it
up. What makes the difference then? What what it is that that makes
one person better able to cope? Or does trauma? Trauma affects us all?
What makes a difference in what you know, how we respond, how
long it affects us how quickly we recover. What are some of the factors
there, So, community, so so who you're around, and the support
that you you get when when that happens. I would naturally, as a
Christian, I'd say obviously trusting God, believe in God, your your kind
of belief system, what or who you choose to believe in. I think
that's that's very important because then it highlights the resources that you actually have within
you. You know, if God says that you can do because you know
you're in Christ, then you know that you're well resourced and you have that
provides. Then hope that provides helps you to refocus and think about the future
rather than focus on the past. You know. So your belief system,
your support system are very important. Some people are naturally more resilient, you
know, so some people have it, have got the gift of kind of
rising up above after pacing challenges. For some people, you know, they
either kind of break down completely and that's the end. And for other people
that's the thing that really motivates them. But I think one of the biggest
things that will help is hope. Hope. You know, there's the saying
that we can go more than seventy days. I think somebody's gone more than
seventy days without food, something's gone more than six days without water, something's
gone more than six minutes without air. But nobody can go the amount of
time really without hope. And our ability to tap into hope is really really
crucial because when we tap into hope, we can start to make choices to
find, to seek community that will help, to seek the resources that we
have will help. But when we don't have any hope, then we become
distructive to ourselves and to other people as well, and for some unfortunately,
for some people, that's the end result of trauma. Yeah, when all
hope is gone, then there's there's destruction. None of that's fine. That's
fine. I think this is an excellent point to stop and play this song.
It's Bobby Mason's Trust his Heart. I want to encourage everyone to really
take note of the lyrics trust his Heart. All things work for world or
cool, though sometimes we don't see how they coold struggles that break ga our
hearts into sometimes blends to the true about them know what's best for her.
His ways are not hard. So when you're pathway gross team and you just
don't see him. Remember, you're never a love. God is too w
to be mistake. God is too good to be unclads when you don't unders
her, when you don't see his head, when you can't race his had,
Trust is hard. Trust he is hard. He sees the mast and
he holds on future in his spad. So told those thoughts who had no
home, and I hobby is home in he We see the press and clearly,
but he sees the first had the leam, And like a tadstreet,
he's weaving you there to someday be just like him all God, he's too
to be mistaken. God is too good to be uncind. So when you
don't unturstand when you're don't say, is bad when you can't trace his And
trust is hard. He alone is very ful true, He alone knows what
is best for you. God is too lost to be mistaken. God is
too good to be uncomd Some when you don't understand, when you don't see
his head, when you can't traces stand. Trust is hot when you don't
undurst, when you don't see his head, when you can't traces had,
trust, tease, trustteeze beautiful selection When you don't understand trust his hand and
his heart. I really do love that song, and I think quite appropriate
as we're talking, Alison about hope, and I think that's where we left
off, the facts that without hope we can do nothing. What can allow
us to rise again, rise above the ashes, you know, recharge and
reboot and go again despite what may happen to us and what our circumstances are
and how it may feel. And look, it's about rising above that and
finding hope in God and finding hope in the scripture and in this word and
this promises, and that song for me speaks very powerfully, and I know
it has gotten me through some difficult times because we don't know the future,
but we know who holds the future, and we know that he has helped
our path and our interest and in mind, as you said, Jeremiah twenty
ninety eleven, you know he has a plan for our lives to have to
give us an expected end, a good end, and that is the hope
that we have, no matter what we're facing. So thank you very much
for that and for that reminder, and I hope our listeners are taking that
away from the conversation today. Alison I'm going to throw it back over to
you as you launch into how to support someone who is experiencing trauma. Okay,
thank you so much, SNIA. So one of the things that we
probably have recognized or need to notice is that trauma usually impacts not only the
victim but those people around them, and so therefore good support network is necessary.
As we said in bringing down the stronghold of trauma from the past.
So what are some of the practical considerations for helping support people who have experienced
PTSD. So one thing is trying not to refer I think I've mentioned this
before, or trying not to refer to the person's upbringing, problem issues,
behavior, you know, like I said, call it for what it is.
It is trauma. If something is trauma, it's it's trauma. Don't
don't belittle it by saying, oh, you know, it's just you know,
this person's got this problem, or this person's got this behavior, it's
their upbringing. Just just recognize it as trauma. That's gonna help them.
That's gonna help them, you know, start to analyze and think about,
you know, how they can support themselves. So whether indeed what they're experiencing
is really trauma. It's gonna help them get their assessments, get the support
that they need, and it's gonna help to validate the feelings and the emotions
the experiences that are connected with the trauma. Let's remember that trauma because the
memories are not kind of thought properly. Sometimes it's just pragments of the past
that get played back, and it can be very difficult for people who have
had PTSD, especially complex PTSD, to actually recognize their experiences for what they
are, and they may sometimes doubt themselves. So let's call it what it
is. The other thing is being reciprocal, So giving what you're treating others
basically the way you'd like to be treated, So giving what you'd like to
receive from them, listening to them, empathy, put yourself in their shoes.
Don't just say, oh, well, you know I would do this
in that situation. No, just stop and just put yourself in their shoes
for a bit and empathize with them and empower them. You know, it's
also very important that we're kind, that we're patients. You know, sometimes
people who have had PTSD might behave in ways that don't actually make sense to
us. But we need to be patient. We need to be to be
empathic with them because then that provides a safe space for them to be able
to open up and to be able to heal. If we're not patient,
if we're not kind with them, we're only helping making them feel re traumatized,
and that's not going to help them, that's going to keep them in
the stronghold of trauma. It's very important that they have choice. So it
can be a big trigger when some people who survived trauma is denied of choice
and control. So it's very important that we confer, we collaborate, and
we cooperate with them so that they don't feel like all choice is taken out
of them. When they're going through a traumatic experience, that's how they feel
out of control. And when we take choice away from them, that's how
they feel they feel retraumatized. So we need to kind of like try not
to overreact. So we need to kind sorry, we need to try not
to say that overreacting, or that being over sensitive, or that being over
anything. I mean, sometimes when it doesn't align with our perspective of normal,
then we can tend to say, well, you know, people are
maybe attention taking or they're overreacting that that doesn't help them, That just makes
them feel unsafe, that makes them feel like they can't trust that environment and
they can't heal from that experience. So let's validate what people are feeling,
what people are telling us they're feeling, and let's not just dismiss it as
them being overreactive. Perspective is another thing, So be aware when the past
is intruding into the present. So for lots of people who have experienced trauma,
say, for example, you know they were neglected, they were rejected,
you know, they will they will have that past kind of trying to
take over what's happening in the hera now. And if we are aware that
they've suffered a particular type of trauma, we need to help them by kindly
and gently making the distinction between their traumatic past and the hear and now.
Also, that's going to mean that we don't take responsibility for stuff that happened
in the past that has nothing to do with us in that relationship with the
person who's been traumatized, Because if you take responsibility, if you allow them
to allow their past to keep contaminating the presence of the future, then you're
going to keep them in that place of trauma, in that stronghold of trauma
predictability. Not everyone loves surprises. Not every one love surprises. People who
are trauma survivors, they actually a lot of the time prefer to know what's
happening. They prefer predictability because it makes them feel safe, It doesn't make
them feel hyper vigilant, it doesn't make them feel anxious like they don't know
what's coming next. So just bear in mind that you know surprises might not
be a good idea, and then space allow time for the survivor to calm
down and take perspective. So trauma survivors often have difficulty regulating emotions and can
take longer to calm down. Okay, So hopefully those are some tapes to
help support somebody who has experienced trauma. So just rounding up lots of information
today, I think we can en there just in terms of summarizing when trauma
occurs in our lives, we experience avoid or evolation that threatens ourselves a sense
of safety and adversely impacts on our mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual
well being. Trauma from past experiences often hold us captive builds walls and tell
us of negative beliefs, imaginations and thoughts, which, if not addressed,
will manifest negatively, such as anger, anxiety, depression, eating disorders,
et cetera, et cetera. We can overcome the effects of our traumas by
believing the truth of God's words and by getting professional help and the support of
those who care about us. As a result, we can grow from our
pain, and God, in this way can turn our pain into purpose.
So a few words of encouragement from the world of God, God will bestow
on you a crown of being beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness
instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of the spirit of despair
Isaiah sixty one, verses three to seven and Romans eight twenty eight. And
we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who
love God and those who are called according to His purpose. And Romans eight
eighteen says that for I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not
worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.
We may suffer now, but if God is in our lives, he has
a plan for good, and he has a future for us, and we
will see ultimately how he's wet through our trauma and how he brings us to
a glorious end. John eight thirty two said this before, and I like
it. The truth. You will know the truth, and the truth will
set you free. Remember, the weapons of our warfare are not carnal,
but mighty in bringing down strongholds. And one of the greatest weapons is the
word of God, which is the truth, which is Christ himself. And
so the Bible says in John eight, that's at six this time. So
if the sun sets you free, you will be free, indeed. And
that brings us to the end of our discussion of well, my presentation today.
Thank you, whether discussion nor questions. We've got anything. Yes,
I think we may have a few more coming in. I wanted to add
to the scriptures that you shared, because this one came to me Romans eight
thirty one to thirty five, and then will end thirty seven. What then
shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us,
who can be against us? He who did not spare his own son,
but gave him up for us all, how will he not also along with
him graciously give us all things. Who will bring any charge against those whom
God has chosen? Is it God who justifies? Who, then is the
one who condemns no one. Christ Jesus, who died more than that,
who was raised to life, is at the right hand of God and is
also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ,
shall trouble or hardship, or prosecution, or famine or nakedness or danger or
sword and my favorite Romans thirty seven, No, in all these things,
we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. Thank you so much.
That's amazing. Thank you so powerful. Then ye yes, thank you,
thank you, And thank God for his promises. You know, it's
what keeps us going, I believe when we are facing some of the most
difficult of challenges. Angie, do you want to add? Have you got
any questions or comments? I think I'm just waiting to see if we've got
any more questions coming. Justin had a better comments. Justina, did you
want to come on and just make that comment? Or it doesn't like she's
got anything at the moment. Okay, okay, right, So Alison,
I was just going to I was going to add another text actually, and
I found this literally just clicked off it. Trouble lost that one. But
again, the idea, and I always love the idea that we're covered.
You know, God covers us, just covers us. Sosone's ninety one four
to six says he should cover you with his feathers, and under his wings
you should take refuge. His tree should be your shield of Butler, you
should not be afraid of the terror by night, nor the era that flies
by day, the pestlings that walk in the dark, just production that lays
waste at noon day. So you know, at the end of the day,
we are covered. And as you said, because of those one of
those things, you know, I guess people can. It may be something
that people are dealing with, it may be a consistent thing, but obviously
you can deal with it effectively. You can. I don't know if it's
necessarily something you get over, because I think it's a lot more complex than
that. It's not quite as simple as that, but definitely steps that you
can obviously go towards to kind of make that a much betteran experience for yourself.
So yes, thank you so much for that. That listen. And
I loved how you highlighted that the importance of network and support, and I
think that also speaks to how some people are more resilient than others. It's
because you've got if you've got a tight knit network, if you've got someone
you can talk to, rely on the shoulder, you can cry on.
All those things help to make you more resilient and more able to deal because
traumas, as we've said from the top, traumas come. It's part of
life, not because we're so not because where you know, whatever society we
see it, whatever degrees we have, you know, it affects us all.
But I think, as you've said, there there's there's there's support out
there if if we are able to tap into that, if we don't have
a circle as such, but there are places that we can go their organizations
and we'll share a little bit about that that you can tap into people who
are listening. They're willing to hear and listen to to your issues, your
troubles and guide you in the right direction. But how important a network is
and how important our faith is ya that's been the corner stone we see in
these in the series. How important faith is and having a relationship with God
that's the key to our resistance or resilience rather as well. Yeah, yeah,
I think, I think and this is amazing, right, having these
discussions, these conversations that really matter, Creating the space for people to to
listen in and and have these conversations. I think it is part of that
support network. The support network comes in different forms, and sometimes you know,
with people that we know, but not necessarily with you know. I
like the fact that you're creating these spaces and you're keeping a close eye on
the awareness days, and you're being proactive to to do the research and to
bring the people on to to have the conversations. And I think that,
you know, this is a way of providing support that goes a long way
compared to physically being in the presence of the people who will benefit from from
programs like this. So I think God, God's given us the ability to
be creative, and I think that's what's going on here, That creativity is
being used to heal the people that He wants to heal through the through this
sort of space on these sort of programs. So I just really want to
comment this program because I've been here a few times over the years, and
I think that, you know, there's been amazing discussions that have happened,
not just with myself, but with other people as well. You've had siblings,
days, you've had men, women, you know, you've covered the
whole kind of spectrum of society, and I think that that's absolutely amazing that
you're doing what you're doing. So keep going and God bless you, Thank
you, thank you. I appreciate that. As we were saying before,
one of the key things is obviously to reach out for support. There is
support out there, and I appreciate that it's not always the easiest thing to
reach out. But we mentioned our Cornerstone Counseling, so you can contact them.
They have a website CCS Counseling dot org dot UK. You can contact
them on zero three three zero one three three two four nine five. They
also have a dedicated listening nine oh to BO seven seven two three eight zero
five PO. We were talking about PTSD and it's been an awareness month and
awardness Day PTSD UK. It's a website there. We have lots of information
and resources there. That's pt SDUK dot org. And also we have to
mention mind as well. Minds dot org dot UK has a lot of good
resources on there as well, different organizations that cover a wide spectrum of traumatic
incidents or series, what have you. I don't think a word for that,
but different areas or different things that could cause a trout about that.
Yes, so there's some good reasons on there. So don't feel that you
have to struggle necessarily on your own reach out and I love Connor Stones kind
of struck lining a shoulder to lean on and that's often what people do need,
you know, whether it's from professional help or those who are supporting you
as well. So we've come to always, always, I just got the
time. It's three minutes fast seven. Oh wow. You know there's always
a good conversation and we know it's a good conversation when we get to this
point and we're like, we run out of time and we know we could
have gone on for another another hour probably, but you know, this all
just means that you know the space for another show, part two. So
we want to thank you Alison for joining us and once again but there's another
installments of this series. Again given us lots to think about, lots of
key information and I hope, you know, I hope that either work that
you that you do is indeed a blessing. I know it is that you
will continue to bless those that you kind of come into contact with, those
people that you work with and that you support, and these type of presentations
that you give us well, and also the work that's spending through your we're
writing your books and everything else that you do. So I do thank you
so much as well. SINAI was one of our guests on Zoom. Thank
you for joining us as well, and you know, for our listeners,
thank you for tuning in to talking point. We often say, you know,
we want to get people more people engaging in the conversation. So you
have a story, or we'd like to be on our panel, or you'd
like to be on us one of our Zoom calls to join the conversation.
Please do get in contact with you. So our time has been spent well.
So we're going to close with prayer. I will say that before I
finish. Don't so now you're doing your show afterwards. I am, I
am. I just decided reading in London. Sonya will be doing her Saturday
Night Praise. So if you're like you know, having a bit of a
jam. We've had a bit of a we've had a bit of a serious
conversation this sponsor. Change your pace there and also go forget. There's programming
back on Sunday as well, with a variety of different shows from our wonderful
presenters. So do stay tuned to Ventis Radio London. So just as we
often do, we start with prayer, they're going to end with prayer,
just to close out our program and pray for those on this topic as well.
Okay, let's pray. Oh my God, I want to thank you
for blessing us with another wonderful day. Thank you for the beautiful weather that
most of us are experiencing, and I hope that's similar for most people around
the world or where they're listening from. I thank you, Dear Lord,
that we can indeed trust you. You are a big God and awesome God,
and that's an amazing thing to do, Lord, And sometimes that can
be difficult for us to kind of comprehend and understand, but sometimes that's not
necessarily necessary for us to do. But we know, dear Lord, that
you can take on all the things that we are experiencing today. We've been
talking about PTSD in trauma, and I pray, Dear Lord, that you
will be with those people who have suffered horrific things, terrible things within their
lives. Dear Lord. I thank you that you are able to cover those
people and send people with skills and talent, Dear Lord to help and support
those people. I pray that you will be with those people, wash their
minds, bodies and souls with your blood, Dear Lord, And but yougin
to do the work that only you can do, a complete restoration. There
may be things, they may be a hard process for those people to go
through, but I pray, Dear Lord, with the right support and the
right network, that you can indeed help those people to become victorious. Please
bless anyone who really is struggling today, Dear Lord. I pray that you
will give them the strength courage to reach out to the support that they that
they can access. Dear Lord. No, it's not always easy, but
I pray that someone will be available for them to lean on. Definitely be
a shoulder. I pray that you will bring healing to those and release them
from the strongholds of their trauma and the impact that it has on them,
set them free, Dear Lord, and deliver them from the future schemes of
our enemy. I pray that you will bless each person who is listening and
who'll listened, Dear Lord, and that they make sense your presence and be
filled with your holy spirit. And thank you for everything you have done for
us and everything that you are going to do. And thank you Lord for
just being so awesome. This is my prayer. Amen, Thank you,
Thank you Alison again, thank you for the prayer, and thank you to
our listeners who were patient at the start and have stuck with us to the
end. I really do hope that you have gained some wealth of information from
here that you'll find useful in your own lives or for those that you may
be supporting. Saturday Night Praise is next. Yes, it is a shifting
gear, but I think it's a timely one. We're just going to unwind
and praise God for all his goodness and his greatness. And Allison, we'll
see you again next time. We'll see you again next time. Thank you
so very much. It's by from me. I'm back with me Angela and
bye from me. Allison. God bless you, so are you struggling to
cope with life. Conflict, bereavement, fear, relationship, anger, depression,
negative thoughts, trauma and uncertainty can all cause emotional imbalance. Don't struggle
alone. CCS, your trusted confidential counseling service, is here for you.
Call our listening line on zero double three zero one double three two nine four
five, our office line for appointments on zero two zero double seven two three
eight zero five zero, or visit our website www dot CCS Counseling dot org
dot UK. Our counselors speak various languages. CCS a shoulder to lean on.
We are here to listen. Adventist Radio London inspiration for the song