So this is a little development on the Minnesota Goodbye. We usually spend about
fifteen minutes or so recording it, and we have a computer rise little recorder,
and we hit the button that lights up and says record, and we
recorded an entire fifteen minute Minnesota Goodbye, and the light was lit up,
but the screen did not show the waveform, so it did not record.
This is one of the things about like digital equipment is just like your computer.
You'll have something, then it'll disappear, or you save something and then
it's not there, and then you're searching your computer for it. Anyway,
we did an entire Minnesota Goodbye a little while ago, and I looked at
the waveform and it was not recorded. So, Jenny, yep, are
you in for a little DejaVu? Let's do a little take two baby?
Oh my god. Okay, let's get started. I'm going to go to
the deleted folder because that is where most of our emails went to. Okay,
we're gonna start off with naughty Tuesday. Now, I'm gonna give you
a little heads up. We said a couple of days ago, let's do
naughty Tuesday, so you will tell us your naughty story and we'll see how
it goes. I will give you a heads up. This is not just
naughty. This is downright dirty and vulgar, and dirty and vulgar. But
this is I mean, if this is what you want to hear, if
these are the stories you want to share, we're all for it. Let's
see how and tell me what you think of Naughty Tuesday, because you might
say, you know what, that was too much, that is too much,
or you might go like, I fucking love naughty Tuesday. So let's
get started. Just wanted to kick off the new segment of the pod with
this gem of a sexual experience from my younger inexperienced days. And I'm gonna
give you a heads up. If you are in the car with a twelve
year old or listening with your fifteen year old son, this is not something
for them to listen to. Here we go. My boyfriend at the time
told me he really wanted to try a facial two finished the deed because he
saw it in a porno. Now. I agreed to do it with him.
So when the time came, no pun intended, I closed my eyes
and stuck my tongue out. He started to panic and said no, you
gotta have your eyes open. I reluctantly opened my eyes, only to get
many shots directly to the cornea. As you can imagine, it did not
feel good, But what I was not prepared for was the burning and stinging
that would come next. Long story short, that shit hurt. My eyes
were red and irritated for hours. It was terrible. So did everybody out
there learn from my mistake and don't open your eyes or make sure your partner
isn't an idiot who aims directly into your eyes. I'm so excited to hear
everyone else's emails, and I really hope this segment takes off staff writer wide
eyed and I will just call her h I have a couple of comments on
that one. First of all, I experienced that myself years ago with a
girlfriend, and I don't know who quested it, because some people like it
receiving it, and some people obviously don't. I've dated both. I've dated
some who like. Yes, I won't get into too many details, but
this time it got in her eyes and we didn't know that would burn and
sting, because you wouldn't think you would think it would be very benign and
not irritant to your eye, but it is an arantive of the eye,
and her eyes were bright red and burning for hours. It pretty much it
feels like lemon juice was squirted in your eye almost. And I was a
victim to this one time. Not a victim, that's the wrong word.
It happened to me. It wasn't a planned situation, and so I was
not prepared for it a and then I also was not prepared for the stinging
afterwards, and so that was not super fun for me, and I will
never do it again. And if this this emailer. The first time we
read this, I didn't catch this, but the second time I didn't realize
how aggressive. He was. Was like, no, you got to keep
your eyes open. I would have been like, the fuck I do.
Boy. That's like, you wouldn't want to keep your eyes open for anything
that's being squirted onto your face, Like even if it's a squirt gun,
you don't want that. I think it's really interesting that you said you weren't
expecting it, so he was. He got the distance out of it,
right, So he was down here and he got the distance right. Okay,
that's I applaud the distance. That's admirable. One other things. I
have a couple of gay friends and we've discussed this. It's like, okay,
somebody said, well, the discussion came up and I can't remember how
that they're demeaning and they're humiliating for a guy to do that on a woman.
And the gay friend of mine said, and I've heard at least two
guys say this, No, I'm a gay guy, and it's not about
humiliation at all. It's because we like it and we find it a turn
on. And I'm like, oh, because I never really thought it was
like a humiliation degradation thing at all. But you've heard that too, that
when a guy wants to do that is because he wants to degrade you.
I mean, I think I've heard it, but I do understand the opposite
side of it being a very big turn on for some people, because yeah,
I would say in my particular situation, I know that he wasn't trying
to get it in my eye, but what he was doing was a turn
on for him. And so that's why I just was like, all right,
all this forgiven. You know what, I think that's a great thing
about, like in a great sexual relationship, sometimes you're gonna do something that
your partner really wants to try and is really a turn on, and you
might be going, uh, you know, not really, but huh if
you really want to okay, And I think that's the best kind of relationship
because that way, if you try it, you might like it, but
you've also done something giving for them, and if you don't like it,
they should definitely respect, Like, oh, I didn't like that, I
don't really want to do that again. And then you've learned that they don't
really like it. But isn't it great to be with somebody who just fucking
loves everything? Jenny? I mean, I mean just everything. It is
great. I, on the other hand, just like to lay there most
of the time. You know that is funny. There's a whole other story
about that, but I will save it for another time. So thank you.
Your sticker is on its way. Next one, Naughty Tuesday, Here
we go. This is from Amy in Dallas, Texas. Did she want
her name? Said m Yes, she doesn't say one way or the other,
so she got a couple of stories, she says, Naughty Tuesday.
Not sure if you were still doing that, but yes we are. We'll
see if it takes off. Here's a quick one. We were doing it
doggie style and all of a sudden, my shoulder dislocated. Ah. That
led to a small scream and quickly ending our session. Then I had to
figure out how to pop it back in again myself. He wouldn't help you.
I mean what, Maybe he was scared. I would be scared to
do that for someone else, because it's already a painful thing. Like you've
seen probably videos of people getting their shoulders put back into place. It is
a painful crack of the bone, and I wouldn't want to do that for
someone. She had to do it herself, and I guess that was a
big interruption to the sacks. Okay, great story. If you got a
story and you want to continue Naughty Tuesday, then send it in to Ryan's
show at katwbeat dot com. Maybe it'll take off, Maybe it won't.
She also goes on to say the other day, I was posting about something
on Instagram and a friend of mine said that her niece was missing and for
people to keep an eye out for her. I went to hit the care
status button, but it instead hit the laugh reaction instead. Whoops, I
didn't realize it until Lady tagged me in the post and said, what the
hell is so funny? I felt so bad, and I said they should
not put those two reactions by each other or on Instagram. When you're looking
through somebody's story and you go to heart it and by the time you hit
the heart, it's onto the next story. Ug frustration. And finally she
says, and I like this, She says, why is it so bad
when you tell somebody you don't want to have a drink. I've been trying
not to drink the last couple of months because I don't like the way it
makes me feel anymore, especially the next day. But anytime I'm out with
people and pass on a drink, it's always why, come on, don't
be lame. I just wish it wasn't questioned. No means no, right.
I think that's a good point because I think that a lot of us
would do the same thing. It's like if I went out with Ginny and
Drake and I'm gonna get, like, I don't know, a vodka soda
and Drake is gonna get a beer, and Jenny's like I'm gonna get a
diet coke, we'd be like, you're pussy. What's your probably pussy?
I'd be like, fuck you guys, drink my diet coke. I've also
been in the non drinking phase, and you know, it's kind of funny
because you'll go to a bar and you'll be like, do you have anything
non alcoholic? Like a Heineken zero point zero or an o'duel's, and every
beer, almost every major label of beer, makes their own non alcoholic.
Now. I don't like beer enough to ever drink non alcoholic beer like I
drink beer for probably the sake of a little buzz, you know what I'm
saying that, Like, I'm not going to go to a place and get
the non alcoholic beer. I'm getting my sprite if I'm not drinking. There's
some good alcoholic beer. They've gotten better. They first came out when I
was like a kid, and they're much better now. They actually taste more
like beers. But there is one that is like a non alcoholic Old Fashioned,
and we have that once in a while, a little mocktail. Yeah
it's a mocktail, and I wish I had the brand, but it is
so good. It's got a little bit of something in it that tastes like
alcohol. Yeah, And I've actually gone back and looked at the can a
couple of times and like, is this really non alcoholic? Seriously? So
I'll find the name for you because it's really good. Next one, and
first off, I want to tell you how much I enjoy your show.
You're always entertaining and keep me company on days I work from home. Thank
you. So my next door neighbor who I get along with, will save
our newspaper plastic bags and give me the stash wadded up inside of another plastic
bag to use for dog poop bags. Very thoughtful. Last week, I
noticed that stash stunk a little bit, so I open it up and inside
one of the bags was a a bunch of cigarette butts. I'm gagging at
the smell and upset at myself thought I even looked at it. I'm not
upset with her. It was absolutely an accident that she had that bag,
and she'd be really embarrassed if she realized she did it. I'm just grossed
out by the surprise and had to share the grossness with someone. You are
the lucky ones who get to hear about it. Thank you, Autumn.
I appreciate that one so or no, it says happy Autumn, not thanking.
Her name is Anne, so happy Autumn. So thank you very much,
appreciate that. That's funny. I'm struggling to get through the ones here
that we haven't already read. Oh, this is kind of funny. This
is random. But a few years ago, maybe ten years ago, you
had people call in and answer the question what is something that you haven't done
in Minnesota but you've lived here forever with examples like I've never had a juicy
Lucy, which, by the way, she spelled it the correct way,
juc. Why that's the way they spell it down at Matt's Bar. I
did not know that there was an eye at it noe when they first put
it up like thirty forty fifty. I don't know how many sixty years ago
they spelled it wrong. They don't know whether they did it on purpose,
but they've left that up and now it is the jucy Lucy. Or I've
never been to Lake Minnetonka. It was supposed to be something iconic to Minnesota
that you've never done. Well, one person texted in, I've lived in
Minnesota my entire life and I've never been to Burger King once. My husband
and I quote this to this day. It hit us exactly the right spot
to be enduringly funny. We laugh endlessly at your show. But for some
odd reason, this is what stuck with us the longest one. Burger King
is delicious, but not iconic to Minnesota two. They had never been there
once. Anyway, I thought you might get a kick out of it.
Also, new trend Online is using AI to make a Pixar movie poster for
your dog, and it's so cute. I'd recommend trying it. I'm gonna
have to google it because I don't know. She didn't send the link for
the app, but what she did is she made a Google Pixar movie poster
for my dog Josie. And it looks almost like Josie, a little bit
more poodle ish, but is so freaking cute and it's like Disney Pixar Josie.
And it's got her sitting on a paddle board with a paddleboard paddle and
it is just adorable. And I'm going to look and see if I can
figure out. I'm going to google it right now. Hold on, let's
see what it is, because I feel like there's a. There's so many
AI filters that you can do on like TikTok even that are like turn your
animal into a Pixar thing. But what she did specifically is a lot different.
Uh you know what. I didn't find anything particularly here, but it
says the Pixar AI pet poster trend is cutless, cuteness overload. So let
me read a little bit here. It says taking to social media. People
go on Instagram, and I have to admit some are very surprisingly realistic.
Check our picks for best AI art generators. Listen, if you google it,
you're gonna find it. So just google Pixar are AI pet poster and
you'll find it somehow. Sorry, I'm struggling because I'm trying to sort through
emails that we did and did not get to. Okay, sorry, here
we go. Next one. Don't say a name. I was wondering,
what was something you believed in you were little, but when you grew up
you found it was all bogus. For example, the adults in my life
and the adults in my family told me that eating the chicken wing tip would
make me stupid. When I got older, I found out they just told
me that. So they can eat the wing tip. Okay. Another time
is when the adults lied to me that the frog legs were chicken wings.
Yep. The adults in my family are big fat liars. Thanks and happy
Halloween. PS Dave, since you're loaded, I wouldn't mind a couple of
benjamins along with the staff writer sticker. Okay, that is funny, business
person, you taking a picture right now. I believe that if you swallowed
gum, it stayed in your body for seven years. Yep. I believe
that if you swallowed a watermelon seed, it would grow in your body.
Okay, the watermelon see that I did not have. But I was told
that if you got all the way down to the white part of the watermelon
and you started eating that you would have to peek constantly. Really, yes,
which watermelon does make you pee more than like most food items, because
it is very filled with water. It is a very water rich I'm sure
there was like almost like some truth through it, only because you were already
eating watermelon. Possibly, I don't think there was any that. I never
never even heard of that one. But I don't think I've heard this one
that if you jump out of a building, you'll die of a heart attack
before you hit the ground. Now, I don't even want to find out.
Have you ever heard that one before? I haven't, But oh,
I don't know what's worse? Well, I yeah, let's not even think
about it. So, yeah, that's just one of the weird things that
we believe. See, if there's anything else, there's a couple of people
who wrote in giving advice to Drake on moving to Shakapee, and we'll cover
that another time. Okay, here is the last one, and this is
from Dawn, who lives in Braidwood, Illinois. I just listened to the
October twenty twenty third podcast where you talked about how police don't clean up a
home after a death. It reminded me of a story. I'll keep the
details more interesting than sad. But when I was house hunting a few years
ago, one home that I seriously considered buying had a locked garage. It
didn't have a great access to a window to see inside. If I remember
correctly, the window may have been blocked or covered from the inside. We
decided not to worry about seeing the inside of the garage unless I put an
offer in the house, and I didn't. I ended up buying a different
home next summer. Somebody on Facebook was given away a plant when I arrived
at the home and ended up being the house that I almost bought. I
mentioned to the current owner. Then she said, I really lucked out by
not buying it. Aside from a flooding issue, apparently there were locks on
the outside of the bedroom doors. Outside of the bedroom doors. No idea
how we missed this when looking at the home. She said she didn't look
in the garage until after they purchased the home, and when they went inside,
there was a noose hanging from the center of the garage. I could
not believe the police, family or realtor wouldn't cut that down nor give the
homeowner a home buyer a heads up. I'm so glad I didn't have access
to that garage. Love you guy. Staff writer Dawn. That is very
weird. You got to wonder what went on in that house that they locked
the bedroom door from the outside. And also, if somebody did kill himself
in the house, why wouldn't anybody care enough to take the noose down?
And finally, who would buy a house without ever seeing the garage because the
garage is like a big part of the house. How big is it?
Is it heated? Is it gross? Is it dirty? Is it roomy?
Is it got a drain on the floor? Does it have shelves?
So the fact that the second owner bought the house without seeing in the garage
is just weird. Yeah, it is very strange. And I'll look at
the garage. I feel like, uh, and that is it that I
think? Actually did record on the Minnesota Goodbye. Yes it did. Please,
so I hope you enjoyed it. Send your emails to Ryans show at
katiegb dot com and if you want to continue Naughty Tuesday, let me know.
Maybe you didn't like it, maybe like the facial conversation was too much
and you're like, that's not what to come here for. Hey, listen,
it's got to be about what you like. I thought it was funny
and naughty, but if you don't like it, we won't do it again.
So send me your emails and let me know. Ryan's show at katiwb dot com