This is the downbeat on ninety seven to one, the freak. When the
sun goes down on my side of town, that loadsome feeling comes to my
door, and the whole world turns blur. There's a rundown bar across the
railroad tracks. I got a table for two way in the vand where I
see loon and I think I'm losing you. I'm getting kind of hard spend
almost every night beneath the light of a kneeon moon. Now, if you
lose your wonde and only, there's always room here for the lonely, watch
your broken dreams dancing and out of the beames of an neon moon. I
was looking at the screen. Was that Kevin or Danny Singer? Which is
just bricks and done? I'm over turn cut? Right? We didn't carry
out that one? No, No, that's right, Ronnie done. I
was fair at the monitor. Player. Can this be our midpoint? Show?
Turn cut? Forever? Getting your money? Hour? Right now?
Elvis is backstage getting holders there stretch here. WHOA four minutes, I'm sorry,
four hours, Jesus thirty eight minutes and thirteen seconds away front totality,
totality. That song needs the drums of the Great Ronnie Tutt going into c
C Rider and the man in the white suit coming out doing a tobit.
Oh see see Roda. It doesn't just mean Roddy kick at the end of
that whatever. Man have a couple of things. My pictures Rick Flair strutting
out to their that's how different we are. Limousine riding, jet flying.
He was the first. He's having a hard time holding those gators down.
So this is a segment that's entitled Eclipse, a Celestial Phenomenon. I'm Kevin
Turner. Hello Kevin. It's Dandy Bayless. He's Mike Siroy. I'm Mike
Siroy. She's JJ Jackson. Hi, JJ can tell you Shody full confidence
that Danny's got Breaking country music news at eight thirty. The details are funny.
Someone was arrested, a huge name arrested behind bars. Maybe the biggest
name in country music spent the night in the clink. Who was it?
And why stick around for those beats? There's nowhere else to find these details
other than waiting for another thirty minutes yep for me to tell you, because
if you're like me, your internet's probably out. You got no way to
no way to look up these things. So rely on the downbeat Page Ellenburger.
Fox four is out in Ellis County covering the eclipse. The eclipse.
Yeah, of course Page got screwed. They sent her all the way out
of town again. We have Hannah bat of Fox four is at Clyde Warren
Park where the Benskin show on the speakeas you will be from ten to six
today. Uh yeah, go out there party with them. We have freak
Jesus as are volunteer field reporter today whom we might try to get him on
TV. Behind one of the reporters here, there's Hannah bought up in Clyde
Warren right now. Where is he? He should be there, He should
be naked under a robe. The robe flies off just he should be helicoptering
meat, Yes, three feet behind us, meat, Carrie, are you
where are you? He sent in a chair. I thought you'll told me
to go to the promism to see I roker both Where are you sading me?
Ma'am? So like everyone's out there, this is this is the story.
Whether you're tired of it or not. There's a reason it's been hyped
for three months. It's happening here it ain't happening again in our lifetime like
this. There will be more solar eclipses. They will pass, but not
with a totality like this. Even if you don't care at all, the
minute that starts, I don't care. Who will start to tear up?
Like will anyone be completely aware that it's happening outside and not walk out their
door or not lower a blind and walk outside. I'm going to get emotional.
Maybe if you're an immobile person, then we will paint a beautiful picture
for you and you can listen to us at ninety Someone in the freak if
you can't get outside, yeah, or if you're if you're blind, if
you're blind, clouds, d stop doing cringe, point in wow, and
I'm seeing cloud. If it's that amount of clouds, we're fine. That's
thin clouds. You're still going to be able to see the sun and you'll
get a great eclipse shot. If that it's as bad as it gets,
we're good. But there's a storm moving our way. Eight o'clock. It's
just gonne. Okay, Wow, the storm's not hitting until post eclipse.
I understand that, but there needs to be storm prep. This is the
beginning of storm prep prep all day. Yesterday, I looked at the map
on my phone and it was big clouds only clouds, only clouds only already
now, all the way through two pm, it's cloud and son, half
cloud, half son. It's already better. Every minute that we get closer
to this eclipse, you gets better. But you're looking at a stupid icon
on your connected to something that knows yes, does it? You need to
look at the actual doppler. The doppler tells the truth. Your Doppler's not
right. This is connected to the best oppler. Your doppler gives negative.
Don't question my models. I won't. Mine's broken. It got too hot
last summer point is a lot going on. US intelligence officials are worried about
this security warning right here in the US from the FBI and Homeland Security warning
of potential threats to public gatherings, The timing of this, and why they're
concerned. Tonight, here's our Chief Justice Course BoNT of Pre Thomas, with
late reporting tonight, FBI and Homeland Security officials are warning miss law enforcement about
the potential for terror inspired by that deadly ices attack in Moscow targeting a concert
hall. The concern According to the bulletin violence targeting mass gatherings such as sports
stadiums, concert venues, or houses of worship. In the United States,
the bulletin come just days before millions will gather to watch the eclipse on Monday,
authorities say. Following the Moscow attack, Ices and his supporters celebrated the
assault and shared graphic and violent attack footage. The terror group calling for similar
attacks in the United States. I'm told us law enforcement is being urged to
take this bulletin seriously. Jesus Kevin. Oh, I thought I was ruining
the eclipse clouds. Yeah, I thought Tim had ruined the eclipse for all
of us. Well, I'm just saying this bulletin. They kind of like
when this attack happened in Moscow the day, They're like, well, if
we did kind of warn them that this could happen, what does that mean
any group? Yeah, we try to tell them. Well, no,
like I'm talking about like intelligence officials were like, yeah, not surprised here,
Well are they telling us anything what you just heard? Look out,
Well it's just a general warning for any large gatherings. I hope you're right.
Well, yeah, but it felt like that one had a little more
specific specificity, do it. Yeah. Also, there's a little comment that's
going to be in the sky today. See a comet, a rare comment.
This is the devil comet all right now, it's horn shaped, but
it could make an appearance during the eclipse. Shut up, this comment is
No, it's way past Earth just as the moon crosses the Sun. This
part up. If you can time it out now, yeah, seriously,
have to turn it out within Yes, at the second that you and the
comet passes in front of the eclipse, you will achieve true divinity and everlasting
life. I believe this planet. And then there and look there's Jesus disguised
as the Statue of Liberty. Uh huh, you're like Jesus, you get
me. We need to get a nude carry roped up on Memorial Tower down
there and Clyde Warren all right, and we just slowly dangle him off the
tower and lower him down into the park right when the eclipse happened. Nude,
a nude freak Jesus. Ah, he's back. How many people would
really think that you have to returned? Yes, they would, as long
as we use a very thin cable. Yeah, which I'm recommending very very
monofilament cable. Well, I think the world is prepared to have the fact
that our Lord and Savior is a ginger. They don't want that revealed quite
yet. It's not a ginger. He's a brownie. He's pretty gingery brown
brunette. Four hours, twenty four minutes to get that, then cable,
and we just a monofilament cable and we lower him into Clyde Warn Park.
Everyone, so get this at and he's like Bubbas Bubba's The devil Comet has
a seventy one year orbit. It was last seen in nineteen fifty four,
will not be seen again until twenty ninety five. Today is the day of
the Devil Comet. Normally we would be talking about this, but we haven't
been because we're too caught up in the eclipse. Where did you read this?
Everywhere? No, no one has heard this worldwide web the devil comment.
Also, we're just gonna throw that in two three hours before showtime.
Well, I've been sitting on this. I could have done the story last
week, but I wanted to do it at eight o'clock on the big day
that we have to be wary of the devil comment. Four planets might be
able to be seen. Now you will need limited cloud cover here, but
you could get Jupiter on the left of the Sun. You could get Venus
on the right of the Sun. You could get a hint of Saturn and
Mars to the right of Venus, but harder to see. But you could
see four planets and the devil comet, which is shaped like a horn.
In't that amazing today? Now? Yeah? Hard to see to the naked
eye. Yeah, it gonna be tough. I'm not telling you. I
don't expect everyone to have a telescope, but it's possible that we could see
these things. Because we have not. Even if you've thought about it,
you've thought about it for five seconds and you've moved on. We have not
gone to the point it shuts down and gets dark for four minutes this afternoon.
That's insanity, that's crazy. If it happened I don't nowhere, we'd
be like freaking out and panicking. I don't yeah, okay, fine,
thousand years ago, yes, we'd have been freaking out and pancking and grunting
at the skies. What did they say on they had the earthquake? You
know, over the weekend and on SNL that you didn't have to happen to
see it. Well, they had. They interviewed the earthquake and the eclipse
at the same time, and they decided they were going to team up so
that if an earthquake happened during the eclipse. Can you imagine like if that
had happened three thousand years ago. They said that that would be something that
would cause them to throw virgins into a volcano. Yeah, exactly, that's
pretty funny. Came out started shaken out there in Irving. They're working on
serving up the world's largest moon pie. It weighs one hundred and eighty pounds,
it measures five feet in diameter, sixty four pounds of marshmallows. Now,
Mike, do not worry about this. But there's one hundred and twenty
eight eggs needed to make it. But you won't know taste them, you
won't know. And they're serving this at the Levey e vent Plaza off of
Los Colinas Boulevard, to which I say, moonpie heist. You're gonna steal
their moon pie? You want to no moonpie delicious street and never gets enough
credit. I haven't had one since I was a little granted, I'm a
marshmallow guy. I mean they're always pretty good. My favorite sandwich is the
fluffer, notre but like, well with that vanilla moonpie is spare give me
it's got to be the choco. They got the choco? Yeah, I
need choco. The yellow one's more of a banana though than vanilla. Right.
Yeah? Do you feel like only five feet diameter for the world's largest
moon pie? I saw this news story over the weekend. I was like,
that's the world record. We could beat that next week total, Let's
make a six foot moon pile. The size of this table wins it.
Yeah, seriously, let's do it right here on the table. A look
at that. That's a eight foot table, bro. I bet that's at
least eight feet. And then even then, it doesn't seem like that right
there, Like I've seen pizzas that are a mile long. Yeah, that
aren't good enough to get it. But they're gonna make a moon pie the
size of your your dynet set and it's ginnis get the nerd with a suit
on and a clipboard and a freaking measuring tape. Yeah said as dynet set.
The only time you hear Dynete sets on the prices right in casual conversations.
I don't want to steal the moonpie, but I am keep I'm staying
vigilant on eclipse heists. Okay, you know that's the time. It's a
time. If you know that, I can tell you everyone is going to
be looking with glasses on that prevent you from seeing anything else. They're all
going to be looking up. You know what you can do down watch out
for pockets. Clyde Warren Park and I am an accomplished pickpocket. I don't
use my powers for evil anymore, but I could go down there and be
standing in the parking lot with fifty wallets, watches, belts. You would
be none those phones in Wade's wallet. Is it were saggy pants easy,
like you could pluck, pluck pluck. I've seen these skills and action back
when you used to apply them for evil. Yea, But I mean you
could probably have twenty phones unlocked because people are too busy staring at the sun,
and when you put you wave wand wave wand the phone in front of
their faces, they're not gonna be able to see it because they're wearing those
stupid glasses show them, Yeah, this is your phone unlocked, venmo emptied
empty, and then put it back. D Bayless at gmail dot com zell
everything to their like you know, put the phone empty, your accounts,
phone back in your pocket. That was great. Let's all applaud the eclipse.
Guess who's rich? Yeh, guess who doesn't band? Right? Our
band is going to be rich. Meanwhile, you're stopping to get gas at
Valero to get back home, and guess what, you don't have any money
in your account? Declined, decline? What's that? Yeah? And him
and I laughing, drinking umbrella drinks and old fashions and our band Preemium gin
writing new songs together, new song. I already got a new van.
Yeah, I've been waiting for you guys to release some new stuff. Oh
just wait, Yeah, we're releasing an Eclipse concept double LP. Oh that'll
be good in twenty thirty three when Alaska gets one, because that's the next
one. Also, guess who will be headlining the Anchorage Civic Center in nineteen
years for nine years? I don't know that bit ran out? What else
do you have? Kevin Well? The other one's twenty forty four, but
that's gonna be Montana, North Dakota. There's no there's not another one hitting
us in our life. We got it today, not here. I just
think, what's the next devil commet? The devil comet is twenty seventy one
years from now, twenty ninety five. No chance you, no chance you
live that long. No, no, like there's like the next one that
happens here in dfwth three hundred years. Yeah, that's crazy and we won't
be. I mean started into the sun, so I mean, if there
are people who are made who can withstand big time heat, if they're heat
people, I don't know. The other thing is if you were going to
listen to Dark Side of the Moon, you could time it up. Oh
oh my god. People love timing up. It's forty the moon. It's
forty minutes and fifty three seconds now, they suggest on this article I was
reading, they suggest seventy seconds before the local total eclipse sign just fire up
eclipse. But what time do we have to start in the air tonight to
hit the part. Now that's getting tough. Now, yeah it goes dark
a reverse. What time do you have to fire up in your eyes?
By Peter Gabriel to where it hits the first chorus when the sun it's a
weird one to. Okay, So if you were going here, we know
it's gonna be one forty. That means we would start up the album at
twelve forty twelve thirty twelve twenty nine, six minutes after the it partially starts.
It starts cutting in anyways, because at twelve twenty three is when we
start grooving. Now on when we but twelve twenty three, well, there
will be a palpable buzz throughout the Metroplex and Hillsboro I'll imagine, is Dave,
there's somehow the city of note for this. Yeah, as one scientist
said, this is the best place to see the eclipse. That scientist who
said that he's on the city council for Hillsboro in cider trading or incisor trading
because he's also a dentist. Coming up next, Danny has Dinga's Morning News.
We'll try to recover from that punchline with the news where we will tell
you a tale about one of the biggest stars in the world of country music
spent the night in jail. You won't believe why. Next