WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.120 --> 00:00:02.640 What's up, beautiful people. I just had to jump in with a quick 2 00:00:02.680 --> 00:00:06.519 reminder that it's going to be a stormy September all right. September one, 3 00:00:06.719 --> 00:00:10.359 I'm in New York at City Winery. September fifteenth, I'm in Philly at 4 00:00:10.359 --> 00:00:14.160 World Cafe Live, and you don't want to miss this. I've teamed up 5 00:00:14.160 --> 00:00:16.960 with my girl each from the East Your Heart Out Podcast, and it is 6 00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:20.160 going to be lit all right. For tickets, click the link in my 7 00:00:20.199 --> 00:00:23.519 bio or go to stormyp dot com. I can't wait to see you guys. 8 00:00:23.640 --> 00:00:32.200 Now, let's get to the show. WHOA, what's up, beautiful 9 00:00:32.200 --> 00:00:35.039 people. It's your baby Mama, Favorite baby Mama, Stormy P. And 10 00:00:35.119 --> 00:00:40.280 we are back with another episode of Chocolate Chip and Sib The Modern Day Female 11 00:00:40.320 --> 00:00:44.359 Perspective. Damson back at it again, and we are back at it again 12 00:00:44.479 --> 00:00:48.359 at the se Content House once again. If you are in the Atlanta area 13 00:00:48.399 --> 00:00:51.759 and look for a dope spot to shoot your content, whether it be a 14 00:00:51.840 --> 00:00:55.119 podcast photo shoot. You want to have a bought mitzvah, you want to 15 00:00:55.159 --> 00:00:57.719 have a birthday party, you want to have a divorce party. You want 16 00:00:57.719 --> 00:01:00.200 to come down to the se Content House and get it done here because everything 17 00:01:00.280 --> 00:01:04.640 is chef's Kiss, luxury dogging, all right, something extraordinary, Yeah, 18 00:01:04.640 --> 00:01:08.519 they got the right name. Something Extraordinary. Content House, the se Content 19 00:01:08.599 --> 00:01:11.719 House. This is where you need to be. Make sure you gotta check 20 00:01:11.760 --> 00:01:15.959 it out. Okay, Now, this episode I'm very, very very excited 21 00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:19.879 about because I have one of my favorite people in the world, and I 22 00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:23.519 know a lot of y'all gonna give me some pushback for it. A lot 23 00:01:23.519 --> 00:01:26.120 of y'all gonna give me a pushback for it. But what y'all see on 24 00:01:26.120 --> 00:01:29.719 the internet is not real. This is one of the most kindest, sweetest, 25 00:01:29.879 --> 00:01:33.560 nicest people I know. Y'all know him as mister let Go. I 26 00:01:33.680 --> 00:01:36.799 know him as Aaron. How are you doing, baby, I'm good. 27 00:01:36.840 --> 00:01:38.959 How are you I'm good. So for those who don't know, tell us 28 00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.799 what you do, who you are other than you know, berating women or 29 00:01:42.879 --> 00:01:48.680 the internet. I am miss let Go, but I am Aeron to my 30 00:01:48.719 --> 00:01:57.680 friends and I help women let go of dysfunctional attachment styles altogether. But online 31 00:01:57.799 --> 00:02:01.640 people would see different things that I I would say, get offended, get 32 00:02:01.719 --> 00:02:07.239 upset, or get you know, enthusiastic about you know, want to talk 33 00:02:07.280 --> 00:02:12.520 about different things, getting a tizzy My whole thing is I believe in having 34 00:02:12.560 --> 00:02:16.039 the tough conversations, and the majority of the people out here are afraid to 35 00:02:16.080 --> 00:02:23.520 have them, So I'm gonna have them. And if nobody else is gonna 36 00:02:23.520 --> 00:02:27.159 say something, I'm gonna say it. Now. I don't agree with everything 37 00:02:27.240 --> 00:02:30.360 he'd be saying. She agrees with everything I say, but sometimes there'd be 38 00:02:30.400 --> 00:02:32.960 some gems up in there. Okay. So I really want to talk to 39 00:02:32.960 --> 00:02:37.639 you about this because I have put up a video not too long ago saying 40 00:02:37.680 --> 00:02:39.639 that it seems like me and a majority of the women out there are running 41 00:02:39.639 --> 00:02:45.719 into the same five types of men, and very rarely does my clips like 42 00:02:45.759 --> 00:02:49.599 one clip will goal viral on all the platforms, and this one did. 43 00:02:49.719 --> 00:02:53.599 Like everyone was in agreement, like yes, since yes, So I wanted 44 00:02:53.639 --> 00:02:57.719 to talk to you today to see if you can maybe provide some insight about 45 00:02:57.840 --> 00:03:00.800 these types, how we can avoid these types, or you know what to 46 00:03:00.840 --> 00:03:04.719 do when we find ourselves in these situations. Okay, let's do it. 47 00:03:05.199 --> 00:03:07.280 Okay. So the first one that I wanted to talk to you about is 48 00:03:07.599 --> 00:03:14.000 um and this one really really really gets under my skin. When you run 49 00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:17.039 into a guy who says he doesn't want a relationship, but he wants to 50 00:03:17.080 --> 00:03:23.120 do all the relationship things like he wants to basically be monogamous. He gonna 51 00:03:23.120 --> 00:03:25.840 be tight if you find out you went on a date. He wants to 52 00:03:25.879 --> 00:03:29.479 talk every day, he wants to text every day. He wants to ask 53 00:03:29.520 --> 00:03:31.840 me where am I going? Who am I wit Like, he wants to 54 00:03:31.879 --> 00:03:37.000 put in the time, the effort, but without the commitment. What is 55 00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:39.400 this about. I've been that person, you know that. I'm not surprised. 56 00:03:39.520 --> 00:03:45.800 I'm almost that person now, but I'm not. But I'm so yeah 57 00:03:45.840 --> 00:03:52.919 that that person sounds like it is that So since I understand that person, 58 00:03:53.319 --> 00:03:58.520 I'm going to speak as that person. Okay, so I'm not that person 59 00:03:59.360 --> 00:04:02.960 now, but I can easily say I was that person months ago. So 60 00:04:04.479 --> 00:04:12.960 what we want is we won't We want to love you right, but at 61 00:04:13.039 --> 00:04:17.680 the same time, we don't want you to love us back. See okay, 62 00:04:19.319 --> 00:04:25.160 See I want you to think about this. Men are action oriented. 63 00:04:25.959 --> 00:04:30.079 We love loving, but for a lot of us, y'all loving us back 64 00:04:30.759 --> 00:04:38.319 is annoying. What we don't want to deal with what y'all have. See. 65 00:04:38.720 --> 00:04:41.800 Women love to say I'm such a good woman. I can be a 66 00:04:41.800 --> 00:04:45.839 good woman. To this man, we don't want that. Sometimes sometimes we 67 00:04:45.920 --> 00:04:48.879 do, but sometimes we don't. And then when y'all start loving us back, 68 00:04:50.040 --> 00:04:56.720 it gets overwhelming annoying, and we get to the point where we're just 69 00:04:56.800 --> 00:05:00.040 like, so, y'all don't want to be treated nice. It's not about 70 00:05:00.079 --> 00:05:06.120 being treated nice. We just want you to sit down somewhere and just let 71 00:05:06.279 --> 00:05:11.759 us love you. But y'all want to just jump up and love us back, 72 00:05:12.160 --> 00:05:15.360 and we may not want that at that particular point, because the thing 73 00:05:15.399 --> 00:05:19.279 about it is when you start loving us back, it actually makes us have 74 00:05:19.439 --> 00:05:24.839 to keep or do more because now this reciprocal thing is going on right, 75 00:05:24.959 --> 00:05:30.839 but you're starting it right. But what this possibly means because it's too dysfunctional 76 00:05:30.879 --> 00:05:34.279 side of this a man and a woman. So I'm saying I'm dysfunctional in 77 00:05:34.279 --> 00:05:40.959 this situation. Also, I want to love you, and the fact that 78 00:05:41.079 --> 00:05:46.319 you just gotta jump up and love me back may actually look like you're not 79 00:05:46.439 --> 00:05:49.399 used to a man just loving you for the sake of you being you. 80 00:05:50.199 --> 00:05:55.920 I think it's a difference between courting, dating and you know, getting to 81 00:05:55.959 --> 00:06:02.399 know people. Once you start projecting as if you want the exclusive, the 82 00:06:02.680 --> 00:06:08.480 exclusivity benefits like the benefits that come with being exclusive and being in a relationship, 83 00:06:08.759 --> 00:06:12.560 Like you want to have unprotected sex. You want me to be in 84 00:06:12.560 --> 00:06:15.959 the house by a certain time, you want me to not text other men. 85 00:06:16.319 --> 00:06:19.680 So you're saying, once I start doing that, you're now you don't 86 00:06:19.680 --> 00:06:26.240 want anymore. No, I'm not that, Okay, I'm somewhat that okay, 87 00:06:26.360 --> 00:06:30.199 all right, So I'm never gonna make a woman do this or make 88 00:06:30.240 --> 00:06:33.399 a woman not you know, I'm not get upset when I'm not that type 89 00:06:33.399 --> 00:06:36.839 of guy. Yeah, I'm just saying. So I'm just speaking on my 90 00:06:38.000 --> 00:06:40.600 aspect of it, and then we could talk about the whole thing. Right. 91 00:06:41.439 --> 00:06:46.800 So my aspect of it is I enjoy loving a woman, caring for 92 00:06:46.879 --> 00:06:49.199 a woman. It could be a woman that I'm not even having sex with 93 00:06:49.360 --> 00:06:54.079 sometimes just so like, I actually have a friend of mine, she's in 94 00:06:54.240 --> 00:06:59.240 LA Her daughter actually got in a little car accident. Right, I didn't 95 00:06:59.240 --> 00:07:00.720 know what type of car accident. She calls me like, hey, you 96 00:07:01.360 --> 00:07:04.199 will you say, I'm at the house, my daughter's just in a car 97 00:07:04.199 --> 00:07:09.800 accident. I'm there, I'm in a car. We don't need seeving together. 98 00:07:10.600 --> 00:07:14.040 I love in that way, right, So when there's a woman that 99 00:07:14.079 --> 00:07:17.319 I'm actually liking, I'm dating, but I know that I can't give her 100 00:07:17.399 --> 00:07:23.439 all of me. I'm going to care for her, and me caring for 101 00:07:23.480 --> 00:07:27.959 her makes her think I'm giving her all of me, but I'm not. 102 00:07:28.519 --> 00:07:30.720 That is just a piece of me. I don't want to give you all 103 00:07:30.759 --> 00:07:35.040 of me. And then you start giving me all of you, And now 104 00:07:35.079 --> 00:07:40.399 I'm like, yo, what is you doing thinking that I'm giving you all 105 00:07:40.439 --> 00:07:44.439 of me? Yeah, so you're saying, y'all, don't purposely be acting 106 00:07:44.480 --> 00:07:46.240 like you want to be in a relationship. That's just how you show your 107 00:07:46.240 --> 00:07:50.160 feelings for people, and we internalize it as, oh, well, he's 108 00:07:50.199 --> 00:07:53.439 doing this, he must want to be in a relationship. So now when 109 00:07:53.439 --> 00:07:56.399 we start acting like, you know, reciprocating it, it's like you're doing 110 00:07:56.439 --> 00:07:59.519 too much, doing too much because, like I said, I am not 111 00:07:59.600 --> 00:08:03.720 to do Who's just like, let's have unprotected sets. Hey, who you 112 00:08:03.839 --> 00:08:07.839 talking to? I don't I'm not that person that part. I'm just loving 113 00:08:07.920 --> 00:08:11.000 you taking not taking care of you, like paying your bills, whatever, 114 00:08:11.199 --> 00:08:13.279 but taking care of your emotional needs, you know what I mean. And 115 00:08:13.399 --> 00:08:18.680 you start assuming that I'm something, and I'm like, yo, just chill 116 00:08:18.720 --> 00:08:22.079 out, man, Okay, Well, can we talk about those guys who 117 00:08:22.120 --> 00:08:26.279 do want to have unprotected sex and you want to be monogamous, but you 118 00:08:26.319 --> 00:08:30.079 don't want to be monogamous, Like, what is their problem? Well, 119 00:08:30.120 --> 00:08:35.559 that particular guy is keeping himself in a position where he always has an out. 120 00:08:37.440 --> 00:08:41.639 Because it goes back to the annoying part. Y'all are annoying, and 121 00:08:41.799 --> 00:08:48.480 we have an understanding that at some point you're gonna get annoying to the point 122 00:08:48.480 --> 00:08:52.080 where we don't want you no more, or we want to pull you away 123 00:08:52.240 --> 00:08:58.320 and start spending more time with another another woman, but expecting all the benefits 124 00:08:58.360 --> 00:09:01.559 of a relationship. And that you honestly think I'm annoying. It's crazy to 125 00:09:01.679 --> 00:09:05.799 me, like you are if if for whatever reason you're unable not you, 126 00:09:05.879 --> 00:09:09.679 but like the person is unable to get in contact me one night and I 127 00:09:09.799 --> 00:09:11.440 go on a date. You're ready to jump off a bridge. But you're 128 00:09:11.440 --> 00:09:15.639 just saying here and told me you didn't want a relationship. That's toxic. 129 00:09:16.240 --> 00:09:22.159 See that part is toxic because now you're like, so you do want to 130 00:09:22.200 --> 00:09:24.360 be with me? This is where we all are. See, I ain't 131 00:09:24.399 --> 00:09:30.960 like that like so so that's the toxic part of that trait that I have 132 00:09:31.679 --> 00:09:35.759 the toxic part of it, but I do have that I'm gonna love you 133 00:09:35.879 --> 00:09:39.720 and you're gonna want to be with me simply because I'm just being me, 134 00:09:39.320 --> 00:09:43.360 but I'm not gonna be toxic with it or whatever. So I think anything 135 00:09:43.360 --> 00:09:48.080 could be too hot, too cold, too toxic, too crazy, too 136 00:09:48.159 --> 00:09:52.639 down, so that that guy is just extremely toxic. And the reason why 137 00:09:52.639 --> 00:09:56.879 he's doing that is because he don't want you. He just wants access to 138 00:09:56.960 --> 00:10:01.559 you, and since y'all are having unprotected sex, he don't want you to 139 00:10:01.600 --> 00:10:07.799 have unprotected sex with somebody else. So, in my opinion, I think 140 00:10:09.200 --> 00:10:13.200 most people, I ain't gonna say most people. A lot of people just 141 00:10:13.279 --> 00:10:16.559 want to be in a relationship so they can have unprotected sex. And they 142 00:10:16.559 --> 00:10:20.559 don't really want to be in a relationship for real. They don't want to 143 00:10:20.639 --> 00:10:24.360 go through the relationship stuff for real, or they don't want to potentially get 144 00:10:24.399 --> 00:10:28.320 married for real. They just want to have unprotected sex with a person that's 145 00:10:28.360 --> 00:10:33.320 not having sex with somebody else for a long period of time until they get 146 00:10:33.320 --> 00:10:35.480 tired of them, and then they're gonna go have unprotected sex with another person 147 00:10:35.600 --> 00:10:39.639 and do the same ship with them. I've never thought about this before, 148 00:10:39.679 --> 00:10:43.039 but you made me onto something. Yeah, it's all about unprotected sex. 149 00:10:43.120 --> 00:10:48.200 It's all about unprotected sex. That's the wildest thing, Like, because you're 150 00:10:48.279 --> 00:10:50.120 right, like, the only way for me to guarantee that you're not doing 151 00:10:50.159 --> 00:10:54.320 it with anybody else or for me to kind of feel safe in this space 152 00:10:54.360 --> 00:10:56.919 and I have to worry about who else you're doing this with is well, 153 00:10:56.919 --> 00:10:58.519 maybe let's be in a relationship. Yeah, And it's like, that's why 154 00:10:58.519 --> 00:11:01.200 we'd be trying to figure out why our boyfriends act like they don't like us, 155 00:11:01.679 --> 00:11:05.559 because sometimes we don't want to be in a relationship with y'all. We 156 00:11:05.639 --> 00:11:09.000 just want to have unprotected sex. If you're trying to figure out why your 157 00:11:09.000 --> 00:11:13.399 boyfriend acts like he don't like you, might because he don't want to be 158 00:11:13.399 --> 00:11:16.399 with you. He just wants to have unprotected sex. Boom facts. Okay, 159 00:11:18.399 --> 00:11:22.440 So another type that I said I felt like we all were running into 160 00:11:22.080 --> 00:11:31.559 was the guy who's giving you everything that you need emotionally, mentally, physically, 161 00:11:31.720 --> 00:11:35.759 making you feel safe, give reciprocating the energy that you're giving out, 162 00:11:35.360 --> 00:11:39.240 making you feel like this is perfect. It's going well, y'all, this 163 00:11:39.360 --> 00:11:43.879 might end up being my husband and then out of nowhere he just ghost you. 164 00:11:43.720 --> 00:11:48.480 What is that about? That is? Remember I talked about I help 165 00:11:48.519 --> 00:11:54.960 people with dysfunctional attachment styles. That particular attachment style is the avoidant attachment style. 166 00:11:56.559 --> 00:12:00.279 So that particular avoidant person and that that could be women too, Because 167 00:12:00.320 --> 00:12:03.039 a woman did me like that. She didn't ghost me, but once she 168 00:12:03.200 --> 00:12:07.840 got what she needed, she just pulled away. And I didn't even understand 169 00:12:07.840 --> 00:12:15.320 why. People just I'm just I'm not gonna say people, but avoidant people. 170 00:12:15.480 --> 00:12:22.120 People with the avoidant attachment style don't want to lose their emotional freedom. 171 00:12:22.200 --> 00:12:26.840 So they are in love with love, but the second you get close, 172 00:12:28.960 --> 00:12:33.799 they get unlike, they get turned off, They don't know what to do 173 00:12:33.960 --> 00:12:39.799 themselves. They actually don't even like you no more. Because the dysfunctional part 174 00:12:39.840 --> 00:12:45.559 of being in an avoidant you, the other person has to be in an 175 00:12:45.600 --> 00:12:50.879 anxious attachment style. Those are the worst, right, So as long as 176 00:12:50.879 --> 00:12:54.879 you're anxious and I'm avoidant, it works if you're If you're if you don't 177 00:12:54.919 --> 00:12:58.720 know what anxious is, that would be like the you have to text back 178 00:12:58.759 --> 00:13:03.639 every five seconds, or like you're like I know you'd be thinking like sometimes, 179 00:13:03.639 --> 00:13:05.840 oh my god, every time he texts me, I get butterflies. 180 00:13:05.240 --> 00:13:07.960 No, you're actually going off on a deep ending. Yeah, you're getting 181 00:13:09.000 --> 00:13:15.720 confirmation. Yeah, confirmation and not butterflies. He's text back is confirming what 182 00:13:15.799 --> 00:13:20.279 you're already thinking, or is keeping you from thinking what you're already thinking, 183 00:13:20.320 --> 00:13:24.759 which I'm not worthy of love. So when he texts you back, you're 184 00:13:24.799 --> 00:13:28.799 like, maybe I am worthy of Yeah. It's like it's like a drug 185 00:13:28.879 --> 00:13:33.720 hit, like it fulfills you. Yeah. Yeah. So in an easier 186 00:13:33.759 --> 00:13:41.200 way, I can look at anxious and avoidant. Avoidant people are positive self 187 00:13:41.600 --> 00:13:48.440 negative other. Anxious is negative self positive other. And what this means is 188 00:13:50.000 --> 00:13:54.360 positive self means I am worthy of love. I know what I'm talking about. 189 00:13:54.639 --> 00:13:58.639 I am smart. I am worthy of somebody listening to me. But 190 00:13:58.720 --> 00:14:03.440 he's other people. They dumb, stupid, they don't got them sent d 191 00:14:03.759 --> 00:14:07.440 they can't park, they need to just you know, move, they need 192 00:14:07.440 --> 00:14:11.080 to get out my way on them in traffic. All these stupid ass people. 193 00:14:11.120 --> 00:14:13.399 You in traffic too, now, but all these other people stupid, 194 00:14:13.519 --> 00:14:16.720 Yes, instead of you, these stupid ass people, but you're traffic mord 195 00:14:16.720 --> 00:14:20.960 them right, You're probably holding up the traffic right right. The person that's 196 00:14:20.080 --> 00:14:24.679 about the park and somebody to grab your parking space. It's not your parking 197 00:14:24.679 --> 00:14:28.600 space, bro, it was never your It was never your parking space. 198 00:14:28.679 --> 00:14:33.559 But you think that's my parking space every day, every day, so random 199 00:14:33.600 --> 00:14:37.919 people was supposed to know that you parked there every day? Random? Right. 200 00:14:37.159 --> 00:14:41.200 So that type of person is the I know what I'm talking about, 201 00:14:41.320 --> 00:14:46.759 but other people are stupid. That person is going to look for the opposite 202 00:14:46.799 --> 00:14:52.639 of them, which is the anxious, and they feel the opposite of that. 203 00:14:52.240 --> 00:15:00.080 They feel like I'm well themselves, I'm not worthy of love. And 204 00:15:00.120 --> 00:15:05.879 then when they meet a person that actually loves them wants to be with them, 205 00:15:05.919 --> 00:15:07.679 since they don't think they're worthy of love, they're going to be like, 206 00:15:09.600 --> 00:15:16.240 why I don't understand all these beautiful women or all these good looking men. 207 00:15:16.720 --> 00:15:20.879 Why me? And then you start self sabotaging a relationship because you don't 208 00:15:20.919 --> 00:15:26.639 think you're worthy of a man or a woman like that. So you start 209 00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:31.799 fumbling around, arguing, texting too much. And when you do that too 210 00:15:31.840 --> 00:15:37.000 an avoidant, it feeds the avoidance ego. Say I knew you were stupid. 211 00:15:37.559 --> 00:15:41.399 All these bitches are stupid. You know what I'm saying. So the 212 00:15:41.480 --> 00:15:45.600 next thing, you know, it feeds his ego where he's now it confirms 213 00:15:45.639 --> 00:15:50.080 his existence as an avoidant person, and it can and when I avoid you, 214 00:15:50.960 --> 00:15:56.600 it confirms your existence of You're not I don't love. So now you 215 00:15:56.720 --> 00:16:03.320 feel safe in this particular little situation as unhealthy as it is right because you 216 00:16:03.559 --> 00:16:08.639 are feeling unworthy of love because you felt like you were unworthy of love before 217 00:16:08.679 --> 00:16:15.480 you met me. So when I actually make you feel loved, you pull 218 00:16:15.519 --> 00:16:22.120 away. But when you actually start making me feel like you are worthy of 219 00:16:22.159 --> 00:16:26.279 love instead of me, that's when I start avoiding you. Okay, okay, 220 00:16:26.360 --> 00:16:30.840 does that make sense? Okay, So for women out here who are 221 00:16:32.039 --> 00:16:37.159 experiencing this particular situation, you're whether they be or whether they have an anxious 222 00:16:37.159 --> 00:16:42.039 attachment style or not, what would you suggest or recommend? Well, first 223 00:16:42.080 --> 00:16:48.440 of all, this second person you're saying that love bombs you does everything right 224 00:16:48.840 --> 00:16:53.120 and then ghost and ghost you. They're ghosting you because the time simply has 225 00:16:53.200 --> 00:17:00.039 ran out. They already are expecting you to do something stupid, and the 226 00:17:00.039 --> 00:17:03.720 fact that you haven't, they're no longer interested. They're no longer interested. 227 00:17:03.799 --> 00:17:08.720 Because they're waiting for the other shooter drop because they already think you're dumb, 228 00:17:08.799 --> 00:17:12.400 stupid, ain't got no damn sense, and you're gonna mess it up anyway. 229 00:17:12.640 --> 00:17:18.160 So they're gonna put on this amazing show to make themselves feel good about 230 00:17:18.160 --> 00:17:22.480 themselves because they're a disavoidant person and now they're like, eye them good because 231 00:17:22.480 --> 00:17:26.960 if it keeps getting if it keeps going one, it could turn into a 232 00:17:26.960 --> 00:17:32.039 relationship. And you can't be avoidant in a relationship. You gotta you know 233 00:17:32.079 --> 00:17:34.000 you can. But it's gonna be dysfunctional. Yeah, you know. It's 234 00:17:34.000 --> 00:17:37.359 a dude like you know, often to go and we ain't even got an 235 00:17:37.400 --> 00:17:41.039 argument. We don't talking about. Man, I'm sicking of shit. What 236 00:17:41.240 --> 00:17:45.000 ship? What ships? What are you talking about? See you raise your 237 00:17:45.079 --> 00:17:48.759 voice. That's why I'm leaving right now. Well, I ain't doing nothing, 238 00:17:48.200 --> 00:17:53.119 you know what. You're toxic. Huh. That's what avoidant people do. 239 00:17:53.240 --> 00:17:57.400 Yes, So to keep them from struggling to be in the same room 240 00:17:57.440 --> 00:18:00.799 with you or the same relationship it with you, they're just gonna ghost you. 241 00:18:02.359 --> 00:18:04.759 Now what about? And this is the part that really gets because it's 242 00:18:04.799 --> 00:18:07.920 not freedom. This is the part that really gets under my skin. All 243 00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:11.400 that is understood. You didn't figure it out. You know I am stupid. 244 00:18:11.400 --> 00:18:14.039 Maybe I'm not stupid. You don't want to wait for me to be 245 00:18:14.079 --> 00:18:17.039 stupid. Now you're ghost me. Now you're going. Don't bring your sorry 246 00:18:17.079 --> 00:18:19.319 ass back around here in three months trying check the temperat you're talking about a 247 00:18:19.440 --> 00:18:22.519 big head? How you doing? You want to see if I'm still stupid? 248 00:18:22.680 --> 00:18:26.640 Is that what this is? No? See, the dysfunctional part of 249 00:18:26.680 --> 00:18:34.400 avoiding attachment is the back and forth, the ping pong. See think about 250 00:18:34.400 --> 00:18:38.240 this. For me to avoid you, I have to go here. But 251 00:18:38.319 --> 00:18:41.319 if I never come back, it's no longer. I'm not No, I'm 252 00:18:41.319 --> 00:18:45.279 not avoiding you anymore because you're gone. So for me to avoid you again, 253 00:18:45.480 --> 00:18:49.359 I gotta come back to avoid me again again. Hell no. So 254 00:18:49.680 --> 00:18:55.839 it's like hell no, hell no, I can't keep avoiding. You can't 255 00:18:55.839 --> 00:19:00.559 avoid a person twice, lady, You keep running into the person twice. 256 00:19:00.880 --> 00:19:03.680 So for them to keep avoiding you, they gotta keep coming back. Ladies, 257 00:19:03.720 --> 00:19:07.359 I want you to pay attention to what this man just said. When 258 00:19:07.359 --> 00:19:11.559 they spend the block, call the cops. Okay, you're trying to avoid 259 00:19:11.640 --> 00:19:15.480 you again yes, yes, when they spend the block, call the cops 260 00:19:15.720 --> 00:19:18.000 that that that's that's it. That's that's that's the takeaway. And an anxious 261 00:19:18.039 --> 00:19:23.000 I mean an avoidant attachment style needs to feel like, oh, I don't 262 00:19:23.039 --> 00:19:26.799 need this bitch. Oh I don't need this nigga, and they look to 263 00:19:27.039 --> 00:19:32.400 avoid you again, so they're gonna come back. Let me go remind myself 264 00:19:32.400 --> 00:19:36.319 that I'll need this nigga. That's it right there. Let me go remind 265 00:19:36.440 --> 00:19:41.079 myself that this bitch ain't shit yep, yep, and she needs me. 266 00:19:41.279 --> 00:19:47.160 That's it. That's it. So another type that we said we all were 267 00:19:47.200 --> 00:19:52.000 running into is the guy who's not over his ex and doesn't realize he needs 268 00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:56.559 to go seek therapy. Yeah. Like, because whatever you think you're doing, 269 00:19:56.599 --> 00:20:02.039 whether you're self medicating, whether you're trying to write a disk track, 270 00:20:02.200 --> 00:20:04.119 okay, it's not working. You need to go talk to the ladies. 271 00:20:04.119 --> 00:20:08.160 But rappers, not me. I'm speaking to the ladies. I got your 272 00:20:08.200 --> 00:20:14.200 back, I got your back, okay, But why don't they understand that 273 00:20:14.279 --> 00:20:18.079 they are stuck on their ex? And when you keep talking about it, 274 00:20:18.079 --> 00:20:22.759 it's not like you know, we're sharing experiences. Every three seconds you gotta 275 00:20:22.759 --> 00:20:26.799 bring this bitch up. Yeah, well I can answer that. I can 276 00:20:26.799 --> 00:20:30.000 answer that. Okay. To me, it's two different things. One and 277 00:20:30.039 --> 00:20:36.319 I might forget the second one Jesus Christ, because the one is the first 278 00:20:36.319 --> 00:20:42.240 one. It's so deep. It's not that he or she doesn't know that 279 00:20:42.279 --> 00:20:48.160 they're over the X. None of us really knows if we're actually healed until 280 00:20:48.200 --> 00:20:52.920 we're in another relationship. That's dangerous. I'm just saying. Just think about 281 00:20:52.920 --> 00:20:57.079 this. The typical person gets of a bad relationship. They don't go to 282 00:20:57.160 --> 00:21:02.119 therapy. It's just a bad relationship, or it's a good relationship and they 283 00:21:02.160 --> 00:21:04.319 got dumped or something. Right, you cry, you get sad, you 284 00:21:04.759 --> 00:21:08.759 ice cream or hang out with your boys, but whatever. Right, you're 285 00:21:08.880 --> 00:21:15.279 single for like a year. Life is beautiful, you're happy, you're skipping 286 00:21:15.359 --> 00:21:18.759 around. Your swag is back, you know what I'm saying. The opposite 287 00:21:18.799 --> 00:21:22.359 sex is back out at you, you know, trying to highlight you or 288 00:21:22.359 --> 00:21:25.599 whatever. But you outside, Yeah, you outside. At one point you 289 00:21:25.759 --> 00:21:29.240 wasn't seeing nobody because you like, you know what you're gonna do me just 290 00:21:29.279 --> 00:21:30.920 like the other part. You know what I'm saying, And you just ain't 291 00:21:30.920 --> 00:21:34.319 paying attention to nothing. But when you get back outside, you're feeling good 292 00:21:34.359 --> 00:21:41.720 about yourself and you decide to start dating somebody else. Those feelings were not 293 00:21:42.000 --> 00:21:48.559 nowhere in your world in the year that you were single because you wasn't talking 294 00:21:48.599 --> 00:21:52.599 to women. Wasn't you know you was talking to women, but you didn't 295 00:21:52.640 --> 00:22:00.480 have feelings for the women. So the trauma or the possible issues that may 296 00:22:00.559 --> 00:22:04.200 come up in your last relationships, you know, you gotta think about it. 297 00:22:04.720 --> 00:22:11.079 People have abandonment issues and they don't know they have abandonment issue. They 298 00:22:11.160 --> 00:22:15.200 have insecurities that they don't really know how deep they are. Right, So 299 00:22:15.319 --> 00:22:18.359 when you're say, say you don't like your titties, for example, right, 300 00:22:18.319 --> 00:22:22.440 if you're just sleeping with a dude, you don't care and he don't 301 00:22:22.440 --> 00:22:26.319 really care. But if you like him, right, you can have sex 302 00:22:26.359 --> 00:22:29.920 with the dude with your damn shirt on. You don't give a damn But 303 00:22:30.039 --> 00:22:33.440 your man is gonna be like, yo, why you don't never do you 304 00:22:33.519 --> 00:22:38.079 know? He's gonna hold your way That may make you feel safe, but 305 00:22:38.200 --> 00:22:41.400 he may hold your touch you in a way where you're just like, now, 306 00:22:41.440 --> 00:22:45.720 I forgot I'm insecure about it? Why he got touched for you there, 307 00:22:45.480 --> 00:22:48.400 What is he thinking? Does he think about titties are droopy? Does 308 00:22:48.440 --> 00:22:51.920 he you know what I'm saying, he see these donkeys when I'm riding the 309 00:22:52.079 --> 00:22:53.400 not you like, yeah, when you are, you know what I'm saying. 310 00:22:53.440 --> 00:22:56.079 But when it's a dude that you don't can on about, you don't 311 00:22:56.079 --> 00:23:00.359 give a damn about what he's thinking. So when you start a dating somebody 312 00:23:00.440 --> 00:23:06.680 that you really like, abandonment issues come out, insecurities come out, and 313 00:23:06.799 --> 00:23:11.880 you start sitting there like why am I feeling so bad? So you're saying, 314 00:23:14.039 --> 00:23:21.279 once you start seriously dating and seriously maybe even entertaining a relationship, it's 315 00:23:21.319 --> 00:23:25.359 a trigger the relationship and taking someone serious, it's a trigger. It's the 316 00:23:25.480 --> 00:23:30.160 opt or the ultimate trigger. Really. Yeah. See, the key to 317 00:23:30.759 --> 00:23:37.759 being in a relationship and getting out of a relationship is actually finding a way 318 00:23:37.039 --> 00:23:41.960 to get triggered without being in a relationship in a way. That's what I 319 00:23:42.000 --> 00:23:45.880 do in my coaching group, because that's how you resolve the issues. Right, 320 00:23:47.000 --> 00:23:51.920 So what I do in my coaching group and unintentionally i'm me, you 321 00:23:52.000 --> 00:23:56.160 know, and we go over different things. We talk about different books or 322 00:23:56.200 --> 00:23:59.359 whatever, and we talk about different subjects, right, so some of the 323 00:23:59.759 --> 00:24:02.839 young ladies there m mute and talk about this and talk about that, and 324 00:24:02.880 --> 00:24:07.000 then they'll say something about their boyfriend ex boyfriend or god they dated or whatever. 325 00:24:07.079 --> 00:24:11.839 Right, and then sometimes they get comfortable in the coaching group, which 326 00:24:11.920 --> 00:24:15.799 is a safe space, right, but to a certain degree, there's a 327 00:24:15.839 --> 00:24:21.799 relationship between me and the women in the coaching group, non sexual. Course, 328 00:24:22.880 --> 00:24:26.519 there's a comfort zone. And then they look at me as somebody that 329 00:24:26.599 --> 00:24:32.039 they see as trustworthy, right, and they start divulging what's going on or 330 00:24:32.039 --> 00:24:37.599 what went on or whatever in real time. See's one thing about my mom 331 00:24:37.720 --> 00:24:40.240 did this when I was little, or my dad did this when I was 332 00:24:40.279 --> 00:24:45.400 little. But when you say my ex that I was with two months ago 333 00:24:45.559 --> 00:24:49.079 or six months ago did this and said that is still running in your mind. 334 00:24:49.960 --> 00:24:52.720 And next thing, you know, when I'll be like, yo, 335 00:24:53.079 --> 00:24:59.160 that is kind of dysfunctional. Why did you go back? Why do you 336 00:24:59.200 --> 00:25:02.079 why did you why do you keep doing that? Why did you do that? 337 00:25:02.960 --> 00:25:06.640 And then next thing, you know, she gets triggered, she want 338 00:25:06.640 --> 00:25:10.319 to lead, she she want to uh cut her face out, you know, 339 00:25:12.480 --> 00:25:17.799 or or she starts talking way too much, trying to do what over 340 00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:22.039 explain because she's defensive. No, I didn't mean that. What I mean 341 00:25:22.079 --> 00:25:29.359 this? Wait wait wait wait no no, And now I don't like the 342 00:25:29.359 --> 00:25:33.119 way you say that. Look, so now I gotta mute her. Oh 343 00:25:33.160 --> 00:25:38.920 she's mad now because I muted her. Right, So now she's getting triggered 344 00:25:41.279 --> 00:25:45.200 in the coaching group, and it's a positive thing, even though she don't 345 00:25:45.200 --> 00:25:48.799 see it as a positive thing. But it's better for her to get triggered 346 00:25:48.799 --> 00:25:55.880 in my coaching group with me than with her next potential husband, because if 347 00:25:55.920 --> 00:25:57.799 you do that with your next potential husband, he's gonna be like, Yo, 348 00:25:57.799 --> 00:26:02.440 this bit crazy and I out. I'm out. Yeah, And then 349 00:26:02.519 --> 00:26:07.240 guess what, You're retriggered by the man leaving. So now you're like, 350 00:26:07.359 --> 00:26:08.599 you know what, None of these niggas shit, fucking all these niggas. 351 00:26:10.200 --> 00:26:15.759 So for women who happen to run it into men who you know are working 352 00:26:15.799 --> 00:26:18.559 through their triggers, they keep talking about they X, is it wrong for 353 00:26:18.680 --> 00:26:22.519 us to point it out to them that they keep talking about their Yes, 354 00:26:22.000 --> 00:26:23.680 it's wrong for us to do that. No, no, no, no, 355 00:26:23.519 --> 00:26:26.599 no, it's right for you to point because the thing about it is 356 00:26:26.680 --> 00:26:32.400 it's not pointing it out. It's about setting boundaries, so on the beginning 357 00:26:32.400 --> 00:26:36.279 of a relationship, or say, man, you start dating right if you 358 00:26:36.359 --> 00:26:40.079 say some crazy shit about your X, I'm the first thing I'm gonna say 359 00:26:40.079 --> 00:26:44.839 is YO, is there a reason why you keep saying that about your X? 360 00:26:45.039 --> 00:26:47.559 Yes, because I haven't worked through it, and I'm fucking triggered because 361 00:26:47.559 --> 00:26:51.440 I like you. Now I'm crazy. Either way, No, I'm letting 362 00:26:51.440 --> 00:26:56.599 you know that that's not cool with me. So you got two options. 363 00:26:56.200 --> 00:27:00.680 You get either like, we're just gonna pull back, keep having sex if 364 00:27:00.680 --> 00:27:11.960 you want to. Hey, hey we were and now I'm just saying you 365 00:27:11.000 --> 00:27:17.039 know, but you gotta leave that as an option, or let that shit 366 00:27:17.200 --> 00:27:23.119 go and we move on. But don't let that shit go and we move 367 00:27:23.160 --> 00:27:30.519 on knowing you now feel silenced because now you're going to resent me, because 368 00:27:30.559 --> 00:27:33.759 now you're going to say, I can't talk to him whenever I feel a 369 00:27:33.799 --> 00:27:37.160 certain kind of way. And now this doesn't feel like a safe space. 370 00:27:37.160 --> 00:27:41.799 It don't feel like a safe space. But the dude don't. He got 371 00:27:41.799 --> 00:27:45.319 to set his boundaries, or the woman has to set her boundaries. So 372 00:27:45.680 --> 00:27:52.240 my boundaries are more important than you. So if you want to keep talking 373 00:27:52.279 --> 00:27:55.400 all this shit about your ex. I ain't gonna say go back your X. 374 00:27:55.480 --> 00:27:56.839 It's not about going back your ex. Yeah, just gonna get some 375 00:27:56.880 --> 00:28:00.640 therapy or something. Is there all right? In a wrong way to set 376 00:28:00.680 --> 00:28:06.200 the boundary? Well. Um, one of the most beautiful things a woman 377 00:28:06.279 --> 00:28:10.880 said to me, which was so weird, was I don't like that. 378 00:28:11.039 --> 00:28:14.319 I don't like that ship. I'm gonna have to drop a dime on that 379 00:28:14.359 --> 00:28:22.119 ship. Go ahead. I Um. We were talking and everything's good, 380 00:28:22.200 --> 00:28:26.680 right, and I started calling her baby. I said, okay or something 381 00:28:26.720 --> 00:28:29.599 like that, a baby whatever. I don't remember what it was. She's 382 00:28:29.599 --> 00:28:33.119 like, Yo, I don't like that. I was like, Yo, 383 00:28:33.720 --> 00:28:37.680 that's what's up. I like that. She was like, huh, you 384 00:28:37.799 --> 00:28:42.079 set boundaries. I like a woman who has boundaries. Women don't be having 385 00:28:42.119 --> 00:28:45.559 boundaries. Now, Can I just say, I want to give you just 386 00:28:45.599 --> 00:28:52.000 a little bit of pushback here, Okay. Setting boundaries is often misconstrued as 387 00:28:52.119 --> 00:28:57.640 being too masculine. How does I don't like that? Same conversation, right, 388 00:28:57.720 --> 00:29:00.440 same conversation. If I tell you on your knee right now, You're 389 00:29:00.440 --> 00:29:06.640 like, I don't like that. Not even that. If you sometimes with 390 00:29:06.759 --> 00:29:11.240 men when you try to set your boundaries, they'll make it seem like, 391 00:29:11.279 --> 00:29:14.119 oh, you're trying to shake charge, or you're trying to be that niggle, 392 00:29:14.200 --> 00:29:15.200 or like you're trying to be the man of relationship. And it's like, 393 00:29:15.680 --> 00:29:18.000 I'm not trying to offend you. I'm just like you just said, 394 00:29:18.039 --> 00:29:21.480 I'm setting boundaries. I don't like that. I don't like being called that 395 00:29:21.599 --> 00:29:25.599 name. Don't ask me for no booty picks after day two, don't question 396 00:29:25.680 --> 00:29:27.759 me where I am when we're not exclusive. I don't like that. And 397 00:29:27.799 --> 00:29:30.839 it's like, oh, well, you you out here trying to be the 398 00:29:30.839 --> 00:29:32.839 man. You got the man's energy, and it's like, no, I'm 399 00:29:32.880 --> 00:29:34.599 not. I'm just telling you what I don't like. But for some reason, 400 00:29:34.759 --> 00:29:38.680 me having the voice to say what I don't like comes off as me 401 00:29:38.759 --> 00:29:41.559 trying to take charge and me trying to be masculine. So let me say 402 00:29:41.599 --> 00:29:45.960 this. One of the principles in my coaching group, we have seventeen principles 403 00:29:47.000 --> 00:29:52.759 letting go. One of the principles is I don't have to explain my boundaries 404 00:29:52.920 --> 00:29:59.279 to anybody. I set them, and that is it. So women sadly 405 00:30:00.039 --> 00:30:04.440 don't have the freedom because nobody has ever told them that they do. Women 406 00:30:04.519 --> 00:30:11.079 don't think they have the freedom to set boundaries. A lot of women don't 407 00:30:11.119 --> 00:30:14.680 want to do to take the condom off when they start having condomless sex. 408 00:30:15.119 --> 00:30:18.119 She just likes the guy and he just takes it off, and you just 409 00:30:18.160 --> 00:30:25.839 don't say nothing, and you just are like you know, because you aren't 410 00:30:25.960 --> 00:30:30.000 taught to say. See, this is what's crazy. Women are taught by 411 00:30:30.240 --> 00:30:36.880 their moms don't trust no man, which is dysfunctional. How are you going 412 00:30:36.920 --> 00:30:40.960 to be with a man by not trusting them? What is important for them 413 00:30:40.960 --> 00:30:45.960 to teach them? But you gotta remember, women don't teach structure. They 414 00:30:45.000 --> 00:30:49.640 teach fears. So women just teach other women how to be fearful of shit. 415 00:30:51.240 --> 00:30:53.640 But there's no structure, it's just fear. So don't trust no man 416 00:30:53.960 --> 00:31:00.359 is fear based. But if a woman was capable of teaching person of you 417 00:31:00.359 --> 00:31:07.799 know, about structure, she would say, tell a man what you want 418 00:31:07.000 --> 00:31:11.400 and what you don't want, and look them in the eye and don't make 419 00:31:11.559 --> 00:31:17.960 excuses because those are your boundaries and that is what you need, or those 420 00:31:18.000 --> 00:31:19.839 are the things that you don't want to happen. Listen to this. You 421 00:31:19.839 --> 00:31:22.960 don't gotta explain why you don't want to take the kind of them off. 422 00:31:22.079 --> 00:31:25.599 Okay, just tell them you don't want to do it. It's either that 423 00:31:25.720 --> 00:31:26.839 or you're gonna deal with your pH being off for the next two weeks. 424 00:31:26.839 --> 00:31:30.799 Now, you can't drink with your girlfriends on the weekends because you want anybiotics. 425 00:31:30.880 --> 00:31:32.960 You don't need all that. Just tell them no. If you don't 426 00:31:33.000 --> 00:31:33.680 want to do it, you don't got to do it. That's the bottom 427 00:31:33.720 --> 00:31:37.799 line. That's the bottom line. It's a people pleasing issue with women. 428 00:31:37.319 --> 00:31:42.559 Women have people pleasing issues, so they are so afraid to say no to 429 00:31:42.640 --> 00:31:48.480 certain things, setting boundaries and saying no and saying yes at the same time. 430 00:31:48.759 --> 00:31:52.079 You're saying, it's like this because another principle that goes right along with 431 00:31:52.160 --> 00:31:57.160 that is I must set boundaries with everyone, including my kids, my family 432 00:31:57.160 --> 00:32:04.400 members. Heavy on the family members members, my kids, my cat, 433 00:32:04.720 --> 00:32:09.440 my dog, get away from me, and I still love you. You 434 00:32:09.480 --> 00:32:14.559 get what I'm saying. You tell your kids, Hey, between this time 435 00:32:14.599 --> 00:32:19.440 and this time, you're gonna look at SpongeBob. You can't ask me nothing 436 00:32:19.920 --> 00:32:22.720 unless the room is on fire. Don't ask me nothing. I'm gonna go 437 00:32:22.759 --> 00:32:29.119 look at my show off to do what I'm going to do. Don't come 438 00:32:29.160 --> 00:32:34.480 in here unless the room is on fire. That is boundaries. After this 439 00:32:34.599 --> 00:32:38.279 time, you can come in here and ask me whatever is that? Okay? 440 00:32:38.319 --> 00:32:43.200 And then give them something to be excited about too. Hey, this 441 00:32:43.400 --> 00:32:45.599 time this comes on. So you're gonna look at your show, and I'm 442 00:32:45.599 --> 00:32:49.799 gonna look at my show. So we're gonna look at our shows in our 443 00:32:49.839 --> 00:32:53.799 own rooms together separately. Yeah, you get what I'm saying. So with 444 00:32:53.920 --> 00:32:59.519 your family members, can I just say what your family your family members sexual 445 00:32:59.559 --> 00:33:02.640 boundaries? Let them know for the holidays, I'm gonna come here, I'm 446 00:33:02.640 --> 00:33:07.119 gonna eat my turkey. I'm gonna bring my potato salad. You're not gonna 447 00:33:07.119 --> 00:33:09.920 ask me where my man at, Where I'm having more kids, How long 448 00:33:09.960 --> 00:33:14.880 I'm gonna keep talking to my special friend, none of that. I'm coming 449 00:33:14.920 --> 00:33:17.319 to lead the prayer, eat my food, and that's it, right, 450 00:33:17.480 --> 00:33:22.440 don't actually wear my man at. I know how long it's been. Oh 451 00:33:22.519 --> 00:33:25.599 my god, that's hilarious. How what is a healthy way to set those 452 00:33:25.599 --> 00:33:35.960 boundaries? Perfect example, Right, your mama calls you whenever talking about dumb 453 00:33:35.960 --> 00:33:40.359 shit, talking about her sister. She pops up at your house, right, 454 00:33:42.319 --> 00:33:47.319 and you set the first boundary, Mom, do not pop up at 455 00:33:47.359 --> 00:33:52.960 my house. Wow, you gotta ain't like you got a man. You 456 00:33:52.000 --> 00:33:55.319 know what I'm saying, ain't nobody ain't like nobody over here? Right, 457 00:33:58.400 --> 00:34:02.240 that's the first thing she's trying to gas like you, I said what I 458 00:34:02.279 --> 00:34:07.559 said, and that's it because there's no arguments. Remember, you do not 459 00:34:07.719 --> 00:34:12.800 explain your boundaries. You set them in. That's it. So even when 460 00:34:12.800 --> 00:34:15.199 she's saying I gave up my life for you and I pushed you out of 461 00:34:15.199 --> 00:34:19.519 this and not ruined my body, we're not even engaging in that. No, 462 00:34:19.599 --> 00:34:22.360 we're setting our boundaries and that is it. And you look at her 463 00:34:22.400 --> 00:34:24.400 with a stone face. Did you hear what I said? Ma? Right? 464 00:34:24.719 --> 00:34:28.639 So the next thing she's gonna do after she said that, tell the 465 00:34:28.679 --> 00:34:31.000 family you tried to fight her. She's gonna do it. So look, 466 00:34:31.159 --> 00:34:35.840 that's that's part of it too. So the second thing, because this is 467 00:34:35.880 --> 00:34:38.199 what's going to happen when you actually say this to your mama or any family 468 00:34:38.199 --> 00:34:44.800 member that is overstepping your boundaries, she's gonna say, you know what, 469 00:34:45.840 --> 00:34:50.679 You're right, I'm never coming over here again. Oh my god, I'm 470 00:34:50.760 --> 00:34:53.320 never coming over here. You ain't gotta worry about you, ain't gotta worry 471 00:34:53.360 --> 00:34:58.639 about me ever. Again. I know I've been a burden to your life 472 00:34:58.679 --> 00:35:00.679 all these years, that bird and all that burden. I don't want to 473 00:35:00.679 --> 00:35:05.440 be a burden to nobody. I'm just gonna go stay in my corner. 474 00:35:05.920 --> 00:35:10.119 I die. Y'all just want me to die, y'all don't love me? 475 00:35:10.719 --> 00:35:15.960 You know what you say? Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, 476 00:35:15.280 --> 00:35:19.679 that's it. So you want me to die if that's what you want 477 00:35:19.679 --> 00:35:23.000 to do, do you want you to die? You know what chicks be 478 00:35:23.039 --> 00:35:28.800 doing? Back to the avoiding dudes. Sometimes we have chicks just all in 479 00:35:28.800 --> 00:35:31.360 our house when we want them right, and we're just like, yo, 480 00:35:32.000 --> 00:35:36.440 how am I gonna get rid of this bitch? Right? And then at 481 00:35:36.480 --> 00:35:38.320 some point she does some dumb shit or say some dumb shit, or we 482 00:35:38.400 --> 00:35:42.480 do some dumb shit and she's like, you know what, I'm I'm leaving. 483 00:35:42.559 --> 00:35:46.039 I'm moving out, like yes, and then she walks around, so 484 00:35:46.159 --> 00:35:51.559 you're just gonna let me leave? Right? And were like, but you 485 00:35:51.679 --> 00:35:54.599 said you was gonna leave, but you you you want me to leave? 486 00:35:54.920 --> 00:35:59.440 No, you said you was gonna leave. So I'm just saying like you 487 00:35:59.480 --> 00:36:02.239 gotta be a woman of your word, and now you gotta be a woman 488 00:36:02.280 --> 00:36:07.559 of your word. That's crazy. It's crazy. It's the same thing you 489 00:36:07.559 --> 00:36:12.199 gotta do with your family members. They are going to hit you with all 490 00:36:12.360 --> 00:36:17.559 types of guilt trips, victimization, justification on why they're doing and why they 491 00:36:17.639 --> 00:36:22.920 all in your face and why they they're gonna make up shit about why they 492 00:36:22.039 --> 00:36:28.880 supposed to be this and have this and overstep boundaries and title to because they're 493 00:36:28.880 --> 00:36:31.239 yourn mama, because you just say, okay, mama, that's it, 494 00:36:31.320 --> 00:36:35.320 and you just look at it with a stone face. Because like I told 495 00:36:35.360 --> 00:36:38.440 you, men will look you straight in the face and be like, well 496 00:36:38.519 --> 00:36:44.199 you you said you're gonna move out, so um, just you want me 497 00:36:44.199 --> 00:36:47.880 to look at the U haul or we don't see what I'm saying. You 498 00:36:47.880 --> 00:36:52.159 you said you're gonna move out. Nope, You're just like so I'm just 499 00:36:52.280 --> 00:36:55.159 I'm just saying I've done it. You got just looking in the face with 500 00:36:55.159 --> 00:36:59.159 a stone face, like, well, that's what you said. So I'm 501 00:36:59.199 --> 00:37:02.400 just saying what you said, just following you. I'm supporting black women. 502 00:37:02.400 --> 00:37:08.360 I'm following protect women, protect black women. You know, Okay, so 503 00:37:09.119 --> 00:37:15.159 slash type that I wanted to talk. Okay, this is another one who 504 00:37:15.960 --> 00:37:19.760 I feel like all of our reactions when this happens to us is the fucking 505 00:37:19.800 --> 00:37:24.599 audacity, right. So you know a lot of times we hear that women, 506 00:37:24.840 --> 00:37:29.480 we have our standards too high, we're asking for too much, you 507 00:37:29.519 --> 00:37:32.280 know. So we decide, all right, we're going to give a certain 508 00:37:32.320 --> 00:37:36.679 type of man a chance. He may not be six feet tall, he 509 00:37:36.800 --> 00:37:38.840 may not have a pretty smile, he may not look like he belongs in 510 00:37:38.880 --> 00:37:43.320 a GQ magazine, he may not have the best job, drive the fancy 511 00:37:43.360 --> 00:37:46.000 it's car, all these imaginatory standards that we set up in our head. 512 00:37:46.039 --> 00:37:49.519 We're like, yo, you know what I'm gonna get us ugly and the 513 00:37:49.599 --> 00:37:53.679 good chance? Right, So you give him a chance and then he playing 514 00:37:53.760 --> 00:37:58.760 your fucking face and it's like, Yo, the audacity because I shouldn't even 515 00:37:58.800 --> 00:38:00.280 have been talking to you, Like, who the fuck do you think you 516 00:38:00.320 --> 00:38:04.519 are? Like, this is the one I feel like that stings the most. 517 00:38:05.880 --> 00:38:10.519 You don't think he feels that like that, I'm treating him like a 518 00:38:10.599 --> 00:38:16.559 charity case. Yeah, oh okay, so you're saying when he finally steps 519 00:38:16.599 --> 00:38:22.360 out, it's an act of rebellion. No, he doesn't belong there in 520 00:38:22.360 --> 00:38:28.679 the first place. He's the anxious attachment style. He's going to be the 521 00:38:28.760 --> 00:38:36.639 person that's going to self sabotage the relationship because he doesn't what belong, belong 522 00:38:36.840 --> 00:38:42.599 or deserve. You Remember, I'm not worthy of love the other person, 523 00:38:42.760 --> 00:38:46.239 which is the most beautiful person, and I'm the ugly person. They they 524 00:38:46.800 --> 00:38:51.960 belong, they deserve all these other things, right, they're entitled to. 525 00:38:52.840 --> 00:38:57.639 But I'm ugly, I'm dumb, and I'm insecure. Ain't nobody gonna look 526 00:38:57.679 --> 00:39:00.639 at me like that? So why is this woman with me? This is 527 00:39:00.679 --> 00:39:05.880 crazy? So I'm happy I'm with her, but I don't understand why I'm 528 00:39:05.920 --> 00:39:09.639 with her, So self self sapotage. So he self sabotages. He don't 529 00:39:09.679 --> 00:39:15.760 play in your face. He just understands that this ain't gonna last too long. 530 00:39:15.320 --> 00:39:21.440 And I'm gonna leave you before you leave me, or I'm going to 531 00:39:21.559 --> 00:39:28.599 hurt you before you hurt me. M hmmm. So we shouldn't give the 532 00:39:28.679 --> 00:39:39.400 ugly niggas a chance. No, fuck them ugly niggas a name of the 533 00:39:39.440 --> 00:39:46.360 pot. It's fucked him ugly niggas. But guys, what what you, 534 00:39:46.599 --> 00:39:51.559 so you don't think you don't believe in the mis mitch match system. Look, 535 00:39:51.719 --> 00:39:57.199 this is the bottom line. Biggie said it himself. You already know 536 00:39:57.199 --> 00:40:00.199 what I'm about to say. All I'm laughing. I ain't, I said, 537 00:40:00.519 --> 00:40:05.599 go ahead, go ahead, however, right if you know, you 538 00:40:05.639 --> 00:40:08.079 know, but if some people listening to who don't know? Now, everybody 539 00:40:08.079 --> 00:40:10.679 listening to Biggie say it, I don't know. I don't know it now, 540 00:40:10.719 --> 00:40:14.519 I don't know what y'all. Okay, he says, I'm black as 541 00:40:14.599 --> 00:40:19.480 ever, however, I'm in Gucci this and blah blah, blah blah. 542 00:40:20.679 --> 00:40:22.440 She's down to the socks, you feel me. So the thing about it 543 00:40:22.480 --> 00:40:31.440 is, he knows I'm ugly, but I have however, so ugly niggas 544 00:40:32.440 --> 00:40:37.679 unless you have a however, stay away from bad bitches, and that's really 545 00:40:37.719 --> 00:40:40.960 it, and you'll be okay, get your ugly chick, because in my 546 00:40:42.079 --> 00:40:46.960 opinion, I don't understand why the ugly fat chicks or the ugly fat dudes 547 00:40:47.320 --> 00:40:52.800 think they're supposed to get a person that looks totally different than them. And 548 00:40:52.840 --> 00:40:55.519 when I say, fat chicks want a skinny dude and the ugly dudes want 549 00:40:55.519 --> 00:41:00.679 a bad bitch when I say why when I say date with than your league, 550 00:41:00.719 --> 00:41:02.360 people look at me like I'm a villain, and I just think that 551 00:41:02.400 --> 00:41:06.639 it's much easier to get along with. We will be on the same page 552 00:41:06.639 --> 00:41:09.280 if we're dating within our league. A tiger don't hang with a lion, 553 00:41:09.440 --> 00:41:13.679 and a lion isn't ugly, or a tiger isn't ugly. They just look 554 00:41:13.760 --> 00:41:17.639 different. And all you're gonna do is develop an insecurity and project onto me 555 00:41:19.039 --> 00:41:22.679 your insecurities. I'm not even doing the most. You just don't throw secure 556 00:41:22.719 --> 00:41:25.320 because you know you really don't belong with me, right, But at the 557 00:41:25.360 --> 00:41:30.679 same time, you're not secure because you're with me. Maybe I like the 558 00:41:30.719 --> 00:41:36.880 way you treat me. No, you're lying to yourself. Why I can't 559 00:41:36.920 --> 00:41:39.039 like the way you treat me? No, maybe I like the way with 560 00:41:39.199 --> 00:41:43.280 my period on you bring me a care package with my favorite chocolate and my 561 00:41:43.320 --> 00:41:45.880 favorite you know, tiling or whatever the case may be. I don't like 562 00:41:46.000 --> 00:41:51.960 that shit. I need gramps. The reason why you are okay with it 563 00:41:52.119 --> 00:41:55.519 because I'm the only dumbass how to do the shit. The good looking niggas, 564 00:41:55.559 --> 00:42:00.000 the niggas with the money don't have time to be dealing with your ass 565 00:42:00.119 --> 00:42:01.920 when you're on your period. So they ain't gonna answer the phone when you 566 00:42:02.000 --> 00:42:06.599 on your period. But the ugly nigga, his dumb ass all in your 567 00:42:06.639 --> 00:42:09.360 face while you smell like period juice. First of all, it doesn't always 568 00:42:09.400 --> 00:42:15.880 have a smell. Let's start there. I'm just saying, so he's the 569 00:42:15.960 --> 00:42:19.199 only idiot that's gonna be around you, and I'm not. I'm just joking. 570 00:42:19.320 --> 00:42:21.960 Yeah, I'm just joking. If I'm in a relationship with you, 571 00:42:22.280 --> 00:42:23.920 I'm gonna be there for you. You know what I'm saying. I'm joking. 572 00:42:24.000 --> 00:42:30.800 But do you think it is a time frame on when to ask someone 573 00:42:30.880 --> 00:42:36.159 what they're looking for? So when I get these questions from when women or 574 00:42:36.199 --> 00:42:38.079 we're talking, it's like, you know, in the beginning, he asked 575 00:42:38.079 --> 00:42:42.159 me what I wanted, and I told him, and then he already knew 576 00:42:42.159 --> 00:42:45.159 what I was looking for, And then when I started acting like I wanted 577 00:42:45.159 --> 00:42:47.199 to be in a relationship, he pulled back. Do you think it's like 578 00:42:47.400 --> 00:42:51.840 a time fernal when you should let a person know that you're being purposeful, 579 00:42:51.880 --> 00:42:57.199 what you're pussy or when you're dating with intentions? Well, this is very 580 00:42:57.239 --> 00:43:04.559 important. Fuck what you're looking for? Okay? Do you have standards and 581 00:43:04.679 --> 00:43:08.280 do you have requirements? See all this? What are you looking for? 582 00:43:08.559 --> 00:43:14.199 That's some bullshit. You gotta say it with your chest. This is what 583 00:43:14.320 --> 00:43:19.440 I need and this is what's going to happen, and if it doesn't, 584 00:43:20.199 --> 00:43:22.800 I'm not going to be in this. Is this like something you say on 585 00:43:22.840 --> 00:43:27.719 the first date? Yeah, it goes back to the people please a thing. 586 00:43:27.920 --> 00:43:31.360 Women are so afraid to just put their foot down, not have an 587 00:43:31.400 --> 00:43:35.920 attitude. But just say it with your chest. You can say it feminine 588 00:43:36.079 --> 00:43:40.280 because earlier you said a man would look at you setting boundaries as masculine. 589 00:43:40.320 --> 00:43:46.480 That's gaslighting because any man that sees you setting boundaries, you know, you 590 00:43:46.519 --> 00:43:53.639 ain't stuttering. You're just literally was at the day like you know, so 591 00:43:53.719 --> 00:43:57.239 for example, we were on a date and I'm like, what are you 592 00:43:57.280 --> 00:44:00.320 looking for? And you're just like, whoa, it's not what I'm looking 593 00:44:00.360 --> 00:44:05.719 for? Is what I require? You know what I'm saying. And he'd 594 00:44:05.760 --> 00:44:07.840 be like, oh okay, I I okay, And you're like, I 595 00:44:07.960 --> 00:44:15.840 require a man that is serious about marriage. Now you you know you'll say 596 00:44:15.880 --> 00:44:21.039 that to me. You ain't got to marry me tomorrow. But if I'm 597 00:44:21.079 --> 00:44:25.039 a person that you see with a future, we keep going. But at 598 00:44:25.079 --> 00:44:29.159 some point, because I know y'all men, y'all see us as annoying, 599 00:44:29.360 --> 00:44:32.800 because we are annoying as hell, I'm gonna I'm gonna tell you so when 600 00:44:32.960 --> 00:44:38.079 I start annoying the shit out of you and you start seeing me as not 601 00:44:38.440 --> 00:44:44.719 marriageable, just let me go. You see how I gave a certain amount 602 00:44:44.719 --> 00:44:46.679 of empathy. Empathy to that. Yeah, I didn't say you gotta do 603 00:44:46.719 --> 00:44:51.159 this for me, you gotta do this for me. No, let me 604 00:44:51.320 --> 00:44:59.159 go if or when I start looking looking like unmarriagable, when you start looking 605 00:44:59.159 --> 00:45:02.119 like you don't meet my right, yeah, because you as a man, 606 00:45:02.360 --> 00:45:07.280 you know you're talking to me. You have requirements too, and you have 607 00:45:07.360 --> 00:45:10.639 the right to change your mind. But a lot of these niggas don't ever 608 00:45:12.039 --> 00:45:20.280 tell the other person that they change their mind. And that's the problem, 609 00:45:20.320 --> 00:45:23.840 because niggas still wants some ass. Because the easiest woman to have sex with 610 00:45:24.119 --> 00:45:28.239 is a woman that we've already had sex with. The easier woman to have 611 00:45:28.360 --> 00:45:32.880 sex with is a woman that we're already having sex with. So sometimes a 612 00:45:34.000 --> 00:45:37.039 man would easily deem a woman as Oh, hell no, I ain't gonna 613 00:45:37.039 --> 00:45:38.320 weary how I'm married this. I don't know why hell I started saying all 614 00:45:38.360 --> 00:45:45.239 this marriage shit because this is motherfucker cursy. But we already have unprotected sex, 615 00:45:45.320 --> 00:45:47.840 We already have a routine. Got to see it through my boy. 616 00:45:49.280 --> 00:45:52.639 Yeah, So it's like that. So next thing, you know, I 617 00:45:52.679 --> 00:45:58.000 don't tell you that you're no longer marriageable. And if I tell you that 618 00:45:58.039 --> 00:46:00.880 you're no longer marriageable, you gonna be blin what what the fuck you mean? 619 00:46:01.079 --> 00:46:04.800 Why am I? You're gonna be all in my face trying to prove 620 00:46:04.880 --> 00:46:07.639 to me that you are. So I ain't gonna say no ship like that, 621 00:46:10.280 --> 00:46:16.199 but you have to tell me that is okay for me to tell you 622 00:46:16.239 --> 00:46:22.480 this. Yeah, because we don't tell y'all shit, mainly because y'all spend 623 00:46:22.599 --> 00:46:28.960 so much energy trying to either prove otherwise when we said what we feel, 624 00:46:29.719 --> 00:46:36.880 or either you turn into this victim and now we're these terrible people because we 625 00:46:36.960 --> 00:46:39.039 said what we want or we had the right to change our mind. I 626 00:46:39.079 --> 00:46:43.280 think men do that a little bit too. Me personally, I never answer 627 00:46:43.320 --> 00:46:45.760 a man when he asks what I'm looking for because I feel like, every 628 00:46:45.760 --> 00:46:51.159 time I've done that, the man has curbed his lifestyle and curbed his beliefs 629 00:46:51.239 --> 00:46:53.559 to try to become that you don't really believe in none of this shit. 630 00:46:53.679 --> 00:46:58.199 And that's why six months from now, we're getting into arguments every three seconds 631 00:46:58.239 --> 00:47:00.840 because you can't maintain the lie that you've been trying to sell to me. 632 00:47:01.320 --> 00:47:06.639 So I also believe in don't tell nobody and what you're looking for. Well, 633 00:47:07.079 --> 00:47:12.920 one of the things that I tell people to do is one, and 634 00:47:12.960 --> 00:47:16.800 it's not a plug, but buy my card game deeper discussions because when you 635 00:47:16.920 --> 00:47:22.760 play a card game with a person you just start dating. You now don't 636 00:47:22.800 --> 00:47:30.280 necessarily have to have these awkward conversation conversations because it's built off of a game. 637 00:47:30.199 --> 00:47:35.519 It's like talking to a kid. And I'm not saying the man as 638 00:47:35.519 --> 00:47:37.960 a kid or the woman as a kid, but when you are talking to 639 00:47:38.039 --> 00:47:42.000 a kid, like say, you want your kid to go to sleep in 640 00:47:42.039 --> 00:47:45.239 the middle of the day, right, or you want to go to sleep 641 00:47:45.280 --> 00:47:50.559 while your kids are still awake. Drill No, oh, sorry, you 642 00:47:50.679 --> 00:47:53.880 say, hey, let's play a game. I want y'all to draw me 643 00:47:55.280 --> 00:48:00.800 why I sleep? So I'm just gonna lay here and I'm gonna like down 644 00:48:01.320 --> 00:48:07.159 somebody right to ship down. It works. So I'm gonna lay here and 645 00:48:07.199 --> 00:48:10.519 act like i'm sleep and I want y'all to draw me while I'm sleep. 646 00:48:10.880 --> 00:48:14.840 And when y'all get done drawing me, it gotta be a good drawing. 647 00:48:15.880 --> 00:48:21.039 Wake me up. You make it now, you gotta look nice, little 648 00:48:21.039 --> 00:48:28.000 twenty minute nap and the kids ain't moved an inch. My son is eleven, 649 00:48:28.280 --> 00:48:30.760 and I want you to know I have sadness in my heart that knowing 650 00:48:30.920 --> 00:48:34.679 ever, like weren't to shit up some gear, I never tried it. 651 00:48:34.840 --> 00:48:37.599 And the fun up part about this my son can draw, so I know 652 00:48:37.679 --> 00:48:40.480 I could have squeezed out at least a forty five minute nap in that damn. 653 00:48:42.239 --> 00:48:45.480 But that's what I'm saying. So, when you make life a game, 654 00:48:45.679 --> 00:48:50.920 because we're all children at heart, So when you make life a game, 655 00:48:52.000 --> 00:48:53.880 no man or no woman is now going to be like, why are 656 00:48:53.920 --> 00:48:57.360 you acting like this? Why why are you got to be so serious? 657 00:48:57.679 --> 00:49:01.360 Yeah, because it's a game. Let's game. Everybody likes playing games, 658 00:49:01.960 --> 00:49:07.480 so I think dating in itself has to be fun. So add a game 659 00:49:07.559 --> 00:49:13.880 to your dating life in this way, whatever comes out of it. It's 660 00:49:13.960 --> 00:49:17.320 fun, and now you can set boundaries because you're like, whoa, whoa, 661 00:49:17.440 --> 00:49:21.119 I was serious about what I said when I was playing a deeper discussions 662 00:49:21.119 --> 00:49:24.519 down but you know it was a game, but I was serious. Oh 663 00:49:24.559 --> 00:49:29.159 my bad, my bad. You don't set all your boundaries, You don't 664 00:49:29.199 --> 00:49:35.880 set all your standards and requirements by playing a game. And after him answering 665 00:49:35.920 --> 00:49:42.400 all these questions about childhood trauma, also right, yes, you can make 666 00:49:42.480 --> 00:49:45.519 sure that he wasn't lying about it, because usually when you play a game, 667 00:49:46.360 --> 00:49:52.039 you don't really lie because you don't think somebody, Yeah, you don't 668 00:49:52.039 --> 00:49:54.880 think somebody's gonna be writing all this shit down. You're just having fun off. 669 00:49:55.760 --> 00:50:00.559 I remember when I did this. Oh man, I I had full 670 00:50:00.599 --> 00:50:02.760 bitches at one time, and I'll you know what I'm saying, and he's 671 00:50:02.760 --> 00:50:06.239 having fun talking about it, and you can't bring that shit up in an 672 00:50:06.280 --> 00:50:09.519 argument later on either. Don't do that, do that, but you gotta 673 00:50:09.599 --> 00:50:13.199 keep it in your mind, like, Okay, so he had full bitches 674 00:50:13.360 --> 00:50:16.320 and he he fucked all on when o't calling them. Okay, you know 675 00:50:16.320 --> 00:50:20.920 what I'm saying. But the thing about it is it was all in fun. 676 00:50:21.039 --> 00:50:23.039 It was all in jest, but you got a good understanding of right 677 00:50:23.760 --> 00:50:27.880 who this person is that you have in front of you, and it's not 678 00:50:28.199 --> 00:50:32.800 awkward. Yeah, people, especially women, are so afraid of the awkwardness 679 00:50:32.800 --> 00:50:38.760 of one setting boundaries and two setting their requirements on what they want from a 680 00:50:38.800 --> 00:50:46.239 man, and the fear of losing said man for setting your boundaries like or 681 00:50:46.480 --> 00:50:49.760 like, I don't want to tell him that. No, I'm serious, 682 00:50:49.840 --> 00:50:51.880 I don't want to tell him that because I know if I do, he's 683 00:50:51.920 --> 00:50:55.440 not gonna want to talk anymore. But that doesn't that simply means that he's 684 00:50:55.480 --> 00:50:59.440 not for you. I agree, but I'm telling I want you to think 685 00:50:59.480 --> 00:51:01.119 about that. I get what you're saying, but just think about this. 686 00:51:02.239 --> 00:51:08.800 If you said you don't like men who wear red, I'm not for you. 687 00:51:09.639 --> 00:51:13.079 I'm not gonna be out here throwing up that sue who he's just a 688 00:51:13.079 --> 00:51:15.239 blood gang? Okay, all right? Every day every time I see this 689 00:51:15.280 --> 00:51:20.000 made on some red and that's no lie. So something as stupid as that, 690 00:51:20.360 --> 00:51:22.440 I'm gonna be like, no, I'm good, and then one of 691 00:51:22.519 --> 00:51:29.480 us could be like he left me, or he pulled away or she pulled 692 00:51:29.519 --> 00:51:34.920 away because of something that's small Uh, yeah, it's not gonna work. 693 00:51:35.000 --> 00:51:37.440 It's not gonna work because at the end of the day, it's not small 694 00:51:37.480 --> 00:51:42.400 to me or it's not small to you, and it's a billion of other 695 00:51:42.480 --> 00:51:45.679 people out here who cares. I'm gonna give a little bit of pushback on 696 00:51:45.760 --> 00:51:51.480 a billion of other people only because I really feel like, especially the women 697 00:51:51.719 --> 00:51:55.599 in my demographic, we really be out here scrapping and accepting and settling for 698 00:51:55.679 --> 00:51:59.480 whatever we can take, not saying this right and not saying that's what we 699 00:51:59.480 --> 00:52:02.400 should do. It really saddens me that wuld really be out here settling for 700 00:52:02.679 --> 00:52:07.880 the barrist of minimums and sometimes not even that. Yeah, yeah, sometimes 701 00:52:07.920 --> 00:52:10.840 you gotta stay single for a long time. Like the girl in high school, 702 00:52:12.320 --> 00:52:15.199 the girl that wasn't giving nobody no pussy, was the most valuable girl 703 00:52:15.559 --> 00:52:22.360 in the school, and she was actually fucking a dude that didn't go to 704 00:52:22.400 --> 00:52:27.039 that school, so she was giving up the pussy. It was somebody in 705 00:52:27.039 --> 00:52:30.400 another school or somebody that was you know what I'm saying. But at the 706 00:52:30.480 --> 00:52:32.880 end of the day, she didn't fuck nobody in that school, So even 707 00:52:32.920 --> 00:52:37.000 though she was fucking, she was super valuable to her environment. So at 708 00:52:37.079 --> 00:52:42.400 the same time. Y'all just gotta stop giving y'all pussy away to random folks 709 00:52:42.559 --> 00:52:45.840 because that's just what it is. Or just be a hole and then moved 710 00:52:45.840 --> 00:52:52.519 to Atlanta and start over. That's what the majority of women exactly. That's 711 00:52:52.559 --> 00:53:00.840 why I used those date women in Atlanta because they are holes. Yo, 712 00:53:01.039 --> 00:53:07.039 you need a chick. Hey, I'm from Nebraska. What are you doing 713 00:53:07.159 --> 00:53:13.800 here? Can you hear, bitch where you come from? I'm from Oklahoma? 714 00:53:14.239 --> 00:53:16.880 What this whole? Okay, all right, get out of here. 715 00:53:20.719 --> 00:53:23.480 Shoot it's crazy. Shoot, shoot I'm from Indiana. Yo, shut up 716 00:53:25.320 --> 00:53:30.239 here for three months? Okay, mmm, bitch right. Um, So 717 00:53:30.280 --> 00:53:34.159 I want to ask you one more question before we get into the questions that 718 00:53:34.159 --> 00:53:37.639 people have asked you reading them, I feel like we don't talk enough about 719 00:53:38.400 --> 00:53:47.960 the um the core demographic of men who have a good job. UM, 720 00:53:49.119 --> 00:53:52.559 don't have no baby mama drama. That's not say they don't got no kids. 721 00:53:52.760 --> 00:53:55.199 They don't gotta with mama drama. Um, they're looking for a relationship. 722 00:53:55.800 --> 00:54:04.079 We're raised right, but are still syncing because for whatever reason, women 723 00:54:04.159 --> 00:54:07.920 don't want to date them, or they give them the runaround, or they 724 00:54:07.960 --> 00:54:08.800 you know, just give them a bunch of back and forth, a bunch 725 00:54:08.800 --> 00:54:14.480 of bullshit. Honestly, why is that? And what advice do you have 726 00:54:14.639 --> 00:54:17.320 to those men? Well, I don't do women want to date them? 727 00:54:17.360 --> 00:54:21.719 Are they the ugly dudes or what? I don't know, just I don't 728 00:54:21.719 --> 00:54:24.519 know. I think there are. It's like, because we gotta put that 729 00:54:24.599 --> 00:54:30.519 in context. Why is the dude not getting their attention? You just said 730 00:54:30.639 --> 00:54:32.719 ugly dudes got to do with the ugly women. So if they're still not 731 00:54:32.800 --> 00:54:36.960 wanting to get you know, the women don't want them meet there or you 732 00:54:37.000 --> 00:54:39.519 know what, I'll say this because all they the good looking dudes and got 733 00:54:39.559 --> 00:54:44.440 all these different things going on for themselves. Are they ugly dudes that have 734 00:54:44.639 --> 00:54:47.119 all these things going the short dudes or the fat dudes or the you know, 735 00:54:47.320 --> 00:54:51.719 I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say what the largest demographic is. So 736 00:54:51.800 --> 00:54:55.159 I'm gonna say it's the average dudes who are having the hardest times being in 737 00:54:55.159 --> 00:55:00.400 a relationship because everybody is going for the good looking dudes or the dudes who 738 00:55:00.400 --> 00:55:02.840 treat them like shit, or the dudes who don't want a relationship. Like, 739 00:55:04.440 --> 00:55:07.239 what advice do you have for that demographic? Oh? Okay, and 740 00:55:07.239 --> 00:55:14.000 and and I hate to say this, the nice dudes. Okay, you 741 00:55:14.159 --> 00:55:21.920 niggas don't be outside. I'm sorry you little socially awkward ass niggas. Don't 742 00:55:21.960 --> 00:55:25.840 be outside, y'all just be on YouTube and shit and sitting around and on 743 00:55:25.920 --> 00:55:30.079 Twitch playing your little video games and shit. That's why you can't get no 744 00:55:30.119 --> 00:55:37.280 pussy. Go outside, bro, not pussy, relationships, relationship, okay, 745 00:55:37.320 --> 00:55:39.599 whatever, okay, but they can't get no pussy. But the point 746 00:55:39.760 --> 00:55:45.719 is these niggas don't go outside. They're socially awkward. They don't go nowhere. 747 00:55:45.719 --> 00:55:51.239 So that's the first thing I would say. Okay, okay, these 748 00:55:51.239 --> 00:55:54.760 women, No, nigga, you don't go nowhere. Oh you do what's 749 00:55:54.800 --> 00:55:57.679 go to work and go home? Right, You got to work, You 750 00:55:57.719 --> 00:56:01.599 go to gym and you go home. Yeah. Them niggas, Yeah, 751 00:56:01.679 --> 00:56:06.840 where they're supposed to be going. It's more places other than the gym and 752 00:56:06.920 --> 00:56:10.840 working at home. Just do you have a friend club? Maybe they don't 753 00:56:10.880 --> 00:56:14.320 like girls in the club. Look, it's not the club, it's just 754 00:56:14.440 --> 00:56:19.360 having friends. So when you have friends, right, male or female, 755 00:56:19.840 --> 00:56:22.840 you can go to sports bars. You know what I'm saying. Football season 756 00:56:22.840 --> 00:56:28.159 about to come, Basketball season, is about over all of these different events 757 00:56:28.239 --> 00:56:31.280 going on in whatever city you're in. Like, it's a sports bar in 758 00:56:31.400 --> 00:56:36.400 whatever city you're in. Just go to the sports bar, have a drink 759 00:56:37.239 --> 00:56:40.000 with your friends. Because some of you niggas don't have friends. That's another 760 00:56:40.039 --> 00:56:44.000 thing. You friendless ass niggas. They do have friends. They're just on 761 00:56:44.119 --> 00:56:45.880 the internet and they talk on call of duty. That's not friends, okay, 762 00:56:46.119 --> 00:56:50.880 A friends. A friend is if your call about to get reposed and 763 00:56:50.880 --> 00:56:52.920 you're like, yo, can I can I keep my call of your house? 764 00:56:52.239 --> 00:56:58.440 If you ain't never had no dude over your house, you ain't out 765 00:56:58.440 --> 00:57:01.360 on friends. So them type of niggas, they ain't got no friends. 766 00:57:02.039 --> 00:57:05.960 So find you some friends, get on I don't know, friends dot Com 767 00:57:06.039 --> 00:57:07.719 or some shit. I don't know what it's out here whatever, people I 768 00:57:07.760 --> 00:57:12.960 don't know. Just find you some damn friends in real life, and y'all 769 00:57:12.960 --> 00:57:16.840 go hang out at bars because women be at bars. Go to the strip 770 00:57:16.840 --> 00:57:20.559 club, do some shit. Don't spend no money at the strip club. 771 00:57:20.599 --> 00:57:24.000 Just go to strip club, sit down and just chill out and leave because 772 00:57:24.039 --> 00:57:27.599 at some point you're gonna get a certain amount pressure. Hey the dude sit 773 00:57:27.639 --> 00:57:32.280 over there, Hey, he ain't throwing no money right, then leave. 774 00:57:32.360 --> 00:57:36.760 But the thing about it is, just get used to being out doing stuff. 775 00:57:36.760 --> 00:57:39.599 You ain't got to spend a whole bunch of money. Bars, sports 776 00:57:39.599 --> 00:57:44.159 bars, they're not expensive. Get you some wings. How you're a beer 777 00:57:44.480 --> 00:57:47.760 and you're good. Get out the house, nigga, And that's where they 778 00:57:47.840 --> 00:57:52.559 meet the women. It's want to take serious. It's not about see. 779 00:57:52.639 --> 00:57:57.360 The thing about it is and what I do in my coaching group, I 780 00:57:57.400 --> 00:58:01.199 always say to the women, I don't care if you ever find a man. 781 00:58:01.840 --> 00:58:06.760 My job is to help you find yourself. And you gotta find yourself 782 00:58:07.000 --> 00:58:12.039 outside. So whether it's a woman or a man, you gotta get out 783 00:58:12.079 --> 00:58:15.679 in the world. Be social. Friend you remember, I keep saying what 784 00:58:15.960 --> 00:58:20.920 friends friend friend friend friend friend friend, Right, If you can't keep a 785 00:58:20.960 --> 00:58:23.599 male friend and you're a man, you can't keep a woman. If you 786 00:58:23.639 --> 00:58:28.880 can't keep a female friend, a new female friend, come on, somebody, 787 00:58:28.960 --> 00:58:32.079 because you ladies, y'all love to have your little friend from ninth grade 788 00:58:32.079 --> 00:58:36.360 and shit, and y'all still best friends and both y'all just dumb as hell 789 00:58:36.599 --> 00:58:40.760 at me, Bro, what the fucking I mean a new friend that you 790 00:58:40.800 --> 00:58:46.239 ain't never met before, and y'all can become friends like in two twenty three 791 00:58:46.719 --> 00:58:51.599 because y'all have to you know, interests or whatever, and y'all don't have 792 00:58:51.639 --> 00:58:53.880 the people please each other and act like y'all aren't this and aren't that, 793 00:58:53.960 --> 00:58:58.239 and y'all be cool with each other. So you can act like a hole 794 00:58:58.559 --> 00:59:02.000 with your friend that you have no ninth grade? But can you act like 795 00:59:02.199 --> 00:59:06.440 yourself, whether it's a whole or a good girl with this new woman? 796 00:59:07.320 --> 00:59:09.440 And that's the thing. Can you act like a hole with Sheila from Bible 797 00:59:09.519 --> 00:59:13.559 Study? No, you can't. You cannot be your real self with her, 798 00:59:13.760 --> 00:59:15.519 right, That's what I'm saying. So you gotta get out of this 799 00:59:15.639 --> 00:59:22.039 world and find your actual self and stop being so socially awkward. It's not 800 00:59:22.159 --> 00:59:28.119 about finding a mate, it's about finding yourself. Get the fuck out your 801 00:59:28.119 --> 00:59:30.159 house. Yeah yeah, Because at the end of the day, like ru 802 00:59:30.239 --> 00:59:34.119 Paul said, how you gonna love someone else if you can't love yourself? 803 00:59:34.239 --> 00:59:38.000 Yeah? Yeah, And love has to be looked at in We gotta look 804 00:59:38.039 --> 00:59:44.280 at things in context. Because I hate all this go love yourself shit because 805 00:59:44.400 --> 00:59:47.000 that don't help nobody do nothing. So my way of saying, go love 806 00:59:47.039 --> 00:59:52.599 yourself. Go find yourself is get your ass outside and go meet other people, 807 00:59:52.800 --> 00:59:55.119 male and female. I have female friends. You're one of my female 808 00:59:55.119 --> 01:00:00.000 friends. I have female friends. I have male friends. I'm outside, 809 01:00:00.280 --> 01:00:02.320 I run into people all the time. We're like, Yo, let's go 810 01:00:02.320 --> 01:00:05.519 get some to eat, let's go do this. Yeah cool, you know 811 01:00:05.559 --> 01:00:07.239 what I'm saying. But the thing about it is a lot of these people 812 01:00:07.280 --> 01:00:10.920 don't go nowhere and they just sit around the house and they go wind and 813 01:00:10.920 --> 01:00:15.760 tell me they can't find the mate. I ain't gonna lie for a long 814 01:00:15.800 --> 01:00:16.559 period of time. That was me. I was like, oh my god, 815 01:00:16.599 --> 01:00:19.880 I really want to man, I really want to man, and I 816 01:00:19.920 --> 01:00:22.400 did nothing to try to get mad. Well you and Philly, So don't 817 01:00:22.400 --> 01:00:24.119 do me like that. Don't love me like that, don't love me like 818 01:00:24.199 --> 01:00:28.719 dad. Okay, So now we're going to get into the edible portion of 819 01:00:28.760 --> 01:00:30.880 the show. So the edible portion of the show is when I read questions 820 01:00:30.960 --> 01:00:36.599 or stories that people send in. Um, there's no actual food. Oh 821 01:00:36.679 --> 01:00:39.719 my god, people say that every eating y'all tap in if you think we 822 01:00:39.719 --> 01:00:45.480 should rename the portion of the show something else, because everyone always says that 823 01:00:45.679 --> 01:00:49.039 either they think we're taking like drugs, or they think we have food something 824 01:00:49.199 --> 01:00:52.960 like, I'm gonna thinking something else because y'all get on my fucking nerves, 825 01:00:52.000 --> 01:00:55.199 all right, icy ass food or something yeah, something like that. Okay, 826 01:00:55.320 --> 01:00:59.519 okay, okay. UM. So I still had some questions left over 827 01:00:59.559 --> 01:01:02.360 from my live show at the se Constant House here in Atlanta. So I 828 01:01:02.440 --> 01:01:06.239 wanted to ask you some of them and get your inpoint on some of them. 829 01:01:06.320 --> 01:01:08.760 First, I want to say, shout out to you. We're writing 830 01:01:08.840 --> 01:01:13.480 down stuff on your card. This is what you know. Most people love 831 01:01:13.559 --> 01:01:16.039 to pull out their phone and then you you old school. I love it. 832 01:01:16.119 --> 01:01:21.719 You know what's crazy. My last live show in Philly in March sold 833 01:01:21.760 --> 01:01:23.960 out at City Winery. By the way, um, you know, you 834 01:01:24.000 --> 01:01:27.519 know, my third showed out show in Philly. But you know whatever, 835 01:01:27.960 --> 01:01:31.880 Um, my phone froze ten minutes into my set. I had to wing 836 01:01:32.000 --> 01:01:35.199 the whole show. If you was there, I apologize. I feel like 837 01:01:35.239 --> 01:01:37.119 you might need a refund because I just was all over the place. Um 838 01:01:37.159 --> 01:01:43.000 And every since then, ever since then, I've been doing cards or writing 839 01:01:43.039 --> 01:01:45.679 down or something else. But this is what people wrote in from the show. 840 01:01:45.840 --> 01:01:49.920 Okay, okay, So the first one. How many dates should it 841 01:01:49.920 --> 01:01:54.639 take before a woman pace? I don't know? What does? What does? 842 01:01:54.880 --> 01:02:00.239 Why do y'all have you learned about dumb shit? Y'all worried about the 843 01:02:00.320 --> 01:02:06.119 dumbest shit? What cares? What do they gotta do it at anything? 844 01:02:07.679 --> 01:02:12.000 Some independent woman or something. So I don't know if it was a woman 845 01:02:12.119 --> 01:02:14.920 or a man who wrote this, But if it was a man who wrote 846 01:02:14.960 --> 01:02:17.800 this, right, he's a loser. Not even that. I don't think 847 01:02:17.840 --> 01:02:25.199 that men should be looking for a dependent like you as a woman can't treat 848 01:02:25.280 --> 01:02:29.119 your man or make him feel special in any way, even if it's just 849 01:02:29.320 --> 01:02:31.079 paying for his haircut, paying for dinner every once in a while, Like, 850 01:02:31.199 --> 01:02:36.920 I don't buy into the fact that women have to just be treated all 851 01:02:36.960 --> 01:02:40.079 the time. If you are not able to give your man something simple every 852 01:02:40.079 --> 01:02:43.519 once in a while, you don't need to be with him. I'm not 853 01:02:43.559 --> 01:02:45.440 mad at this question if it came from a man. If it came from 854 01:02:45.480 --> 01:02:51.360 a woman, maybe she honestly doesn't know. How do I know we're serious 855 01:02:51.440 --> 01:02:53.119 enough for me to pay for something? Because I don't think you should do 856 01:02:53.119 --> 01:02:59.599 it for everybody? Right? Serious enough? And and another thing, that's 857 01:02:59.599 --> 01:03:01.840 see how we're you'll pay for you don't want to pay for the day? 858 01:03:01.880 --> 01:03:07.800 Okay, not even that, but then also automatically, automatically the first time 859 01:03:07.880 --> 01:03:10.679 you try to pay for an ass already, but look ahead, I'm just 860 01:03:10.719 --> 01:03:15.519 saying, just madness, go ahead. What I do in my booty hole 861 01:03:15.559 --> 01:03:19.079 is none of your business. I'm just saying. I'm just saying. I 862 01:03:19.719 --> 01:03:23.360 also think that whenever you offer to pay for a man's anything, there's automatically 863 01:03:23.360 --> 01:03:27.960 going to be pushback. So it's like, at one point, is it 864 01:03:28.079 --> 01:03:32.639 okay to endure the pushback? Enduring pushback and you're just some my aim, 865 01:03:32.719 --> 01:03:42.719 that's hilarious. But the answer to that is sit your ass down and shut 866 01:03:42.840 --> 01:03:46.199 up. Okay. Why is it so hard for women to sit their asses 867 01:03:46.239 --> 01:03:52.880 down somewhere? Why is it so whatevering to you to have to want to 868 01:03:52.960 --> 01:03:59.840 pay? Like it's okay to not pay, and it's okay to pay, 869 01:04:00.119 --> 01:04:01.480 but for you to turn around and say, when should I do this? 870 01:04:01.599 --> 01:04:04.880 When should I do that? There's a problem there because you want to make 871 01:04:04.920 --> 01:04:09.760 sure the man's comfortable. Now, I don't let you pay. I don't 872 01:04:09.800 --> 01:04:13.519 have that sentiment because y'all know I'll check on a nigga. I really don't 873 01:04:13.519 --> 01:04:15.880 care. I've said it multiple times. I don't really give a fuck. 874 01:04:15.159 --> 01:04:19.679 But some women, especially those who are not familiar with that space, they 875 01:04:19.719 --> 01:04:21.519 might have a question or two, like, Yo, when is it okay 876 01:04:21.519 --> 01:04:27.400 to pay for a nigga? Okay? So I would say this offer to 877 01:04:27.480 --> 01:04:31.239 pay on the third whatever day? Right, If you're like, no, 878 01:04:31.320 --> 01:04:34.159 it's it's cool, okay, cool? Right? I agree, you know, 879 01:04:34.519 --> 01:04:40.719 and then let it go. And then I would say the seventh, 880 01:04:40.760 --> 01:04:44.280 eighth day, Oh, I don't know, you know, hey I want 881 01:04:44.280 --> 01:04:49.079 to pay? No cool? You know. But according to what it's sounding 882 01:04:49.119 --> 01:04:53.880 like, you like, when am I just going to force this nigga to 883 01:04:54.079 --> 01:04:57.159 let me pay? So I get some asks? You know that? So 884 01:04:57.280 --> 01:05:00.719 I get some ask you get what I'm saying. That's kind like what what 885 01:05:00.920 --> 01:05:04.119 it sounds. If it's a woman asking that, she's just like, I 886 01:05:04.199 --> 01:05:06.599 want to be the man? Why? Why? Why he won't let me 887 01:05:06.639 --> 01:05:10.280 be the man? That's kind of like what I see, because if you 888 01:05:10.320 --> 01:05:14.800 want to do something, it's nothing wrong with saying hey can I can I 889 01:05:14.880 --> 01:05:19.320 pay tonight? I'm totally okay with a woman randomly saying hey, let me 890 01:05:19.519 --> 01:05:23.400 let me pay tonight? Yeah, I'm cool, or I'll be like yo, 891 01:05:23.480 --> 01:05:25.079 like, if you free later, can I take you to get some 892 01:05:25.119 --> 01:05:27.920 drinks? Yeah, but I'm gonna pay. But if you turn around and 893 01:05:27.920 --> 01:05:31.039 say can I pay, cool, I'm not funna be like no, I'm 894 01:05:31.079 --> 01:05:34.280 a man. I'm a man. You came at me like can I pay? 895 01:05:34.320 --> 01:05:38.119 I want to do something nice for you. Do something nice for me. 896 01:05:38.280 --> 01:05:42.599 I love that. So are we gonna act like that? Weird moment 897 01:05:42.679 --> 01:05:46.280 doesn't exist when the woman is paying and the nigga just looking around, anxious, 898 01:05:46.360 --> 01:05:49.159 not knowing what to do because he doesn't get it. Often because that 899 01:05:49.280 --> 01:05:55.280 is that's an awkward moment for men too. Okay, in my situations, 900 01:05:55.679 --> 01:06:00.320 me and a woman is sitting in the booth together because I'm all affect in 901 01:06:00.360 --> 01:06:01.760 that shit, right, I don't like you sitting across from me, so 902 01:06:02.079 --> 01:06:10.960 me and you, So me and you are sitting on the same side of 903 01:06:11.000 --> 01:06:15.280 the booth or whatever, right, And then she hands me the bill, 904 01:06:15.519 --> 01:06:17.599 right, and she's like, no, I'm taking that. I was like, 905 01:06:17.639 --> 01:06:23.079 okay, she's taking that, and I'm gonna sit my ass back while 906 01:06:23.079 --> 01:06:27.079 she sitting her ass forward and she hands the car. So you're saying double 907 01:06:27.119 --> 01:06:29.519 down, on it. Yeah, I'm gonna look back, I'm and I'm 908 01:06:29.519 --> 01:06:31.760 gonna look at the waitress like, yeah, I'm sucking shit out of this 909 01:06:31.800 --> 01:06:38.440 girl. Yeah, I'm paying with pipe. I'm paying with pipe. You 910 01:06:38.440 --> 01:06:42.320 know what I'm saying. You just sit back and just chill out. Well, 911 01:06:42.320 --> 01:06:47.760 one thing about me, I'm not going to be awkward nowhere what I'm 912 01:06:47.760 --> 01:06:51.239 just laughing, bitchuring you with your arms around your shirty waist while she's paying, 913 01:06:51.360 --> 01:06:55.119 Like, I don't know, I'm not doing that I'm doing I'm not 914 01:06:55.159 --> 01:06:58.639 doing that. I'm not doing that. I'm not because i know exactly what 915 01:06:58.679 --> 01:07:02.000 you're saying. I'm never going to be that dude that is holding his girl 916 01:07:02.119 --> 01:07:05.559 around the waist while she seeks the card and the thing to pay for all 917 01:07:05.599 --> 01:07:12.239 these groceries. That shit is so sad. But no, I'm gonna pay 918 01:07:12.280 --> 01:07:15.360 for the groceries. I'm gonna pay for no, because my whole thing is 919 01:07:15.360 --> 01:07:17.239 this. You can pay for the food, you can pay for the movies 920 01:07:17.320 --> 01:07:21.400 or whatever. But when it comes to like if I'm grocery shopping with you, 921 01:07:21.800 --> 01:07:26.800 like for example, right say, if me and you are just out 922 01:07:27.199 --> 01:07:29.880 and you say, hey, I gotta pick up some things let's stop at 923 01:07:29.920 --> 01:07:32.159 Target and we just walk around spending time together. Right, Yes, if 924 01:07:32.159 --> 01:07:35.280 you buying some little toiletry ship, I'm just gonna buy it. Now. 925 01:07:35.320 --> 01:07:39.960 If you go buy TV or something, you know, that's a different situation, 926 01:07:40.079 --> 01:07:43.440 and then I might just be holding you like to do because I'm not. 927 01:07:43.519 --> 01:07:46.440 I'm not buying that got them tv? Right, But altogether I'm just 928 01:07:46.480 --> 01:07:51.159 gonna pay for it. But not groceries. Yeah, groceries whatever, taught 929 01:07:51.400 --> 01:07:56.639 groceries or whatever. But if she get food stamps, I'm not dating to 930 01:07:56.719 --> 01:08:00.800 chick that work. Okay. I love hood rat so I this is the 931 01:08:00.800 --> 01:08:02.400 ones who got it. But I don't be out in the open with hood 932 01:08:02.440 --> 01:08:05.960 rats though, So who the hell is going grocery shop with a hood rat? 933 01:08:06.400 --> 01:08:12.199 Okay? The guys that the hood rets state, No, there' be 934 01:08:12.280 --> 01:08:15.559 the ones who we stand on what They aren't around the waist, but they're 935 01:08:15.559 --> 01:08:21.199 the hood rat dudes. Sometimes sometimes a dude, would you know, fly 936 01:08:21.359 --> 01:08:26.960 down to you know, mess around with a hood like the scent that you 937 01:08:27.119 --> 01:08:31.239 provided the descentsion? Right, is there a name for hood red dudes? 938 01:08:31.920 --> 01:08:35.640 Is there a name for hood red dudes? Pookies yea and ray Rays. 939 01:08:35.720 --> 01:08:41.920 I hate you so much. You do know want picks, the pookie pickers 940 01:08:42.159 --> 01:08:45.880 late, I've never heard that the pookie pickers. Yeah, shout out to 941 01:08:45.880 --> 01:08:50.520 the pookie pickers and the loser choosers. Please drop your information so you get 942 01:08:50.520 --> 01:08:56.640 the funk off my podcast. Thank you. But um, I am Missed 943 01:08:56.800 --> 01:09:00.920 let Go and you can find me on YouTube as mister let Go m R 944 01:09:00.159 --> 01:09:05.880 l Etgo, and I have another YouTube channel called Deeper Discussions because I'm pushing 945 01:09:05.960 --> 01:09:13.079 my brand Deeper Discussions. And on Instagram it's well, I have two different 946 01:09:13.119 --> 01:09:16.960 Instagrams also, but as I am underscore MISSI Lego, I am underscore MISSI 947 01:09:17.119 --> 01:09:21.000 Lego. But all this other shit who cares? But that's it okay. 948 01:09:21.000 --> 01:09:27.439 And what about your coaching my coaching that well, just send me a DM 949 01:09:27.520 --> 01:09:31.119 on Instagram or on well mainly on Instagram, and I can hook you up 950 01:09:31.159 --> 01:09:36.760 with that. I actually know a few people in your coaching things. Okay, 951 01:09:36.960 --> 01:09:43.159 yeah, bullshit, y'all, don't do it. I'm just shruging. 952 01:09:43.560 --> 01:09:45.319 Um, thank you so much for do you know some people in my coaching 953 01:09:45.359 --> 01:09:49.680 grotube? We were talking about it afterwards. Yeah, Um, I am 954 01:09:49.760 --> 01:09:53.279 so happy that you came to chop it up with me. I feel like 955 01:09:53.359 --> 01:09:58.119 we met on the set of Tonight's Conversations and everyone was like, just just 956 01:09:58.159 --> 01:10:00.000 whatever he say do only to get you. Just let it roll off your 957 01:10:00.039 --> 01:10:03.439 bet. Don't let him get under your skin. And I was terrified, 958 01:10:03.479 --> 01:10:06.439 and I think like my first or second show was with you. Yeah, 959 01:10:06.479 --> 01:10:09.479 and I was like, oh my god, I hope he's so nice. 960 01:10:09.520 --> 01:10:12.720 I really hope he's nice. And you are really the sweetest person. Like 961 01:10:12.720 --> 01:10:14.920 I said it at the beginning of the show, it is real, one 962 01:10:14.960 --> 01:10:17.399 of the nicest people I have ever met. Yeah, he's just been playing 963 01:10:17.439 --> 01:10:20.199 like an ass whole on the internet. Y'all promise, I really really promise. 964 01:10:20.319 --> 01:10:25.359 He's got around each other on set and we was like best friends and 965 01:10:25.439 --> 01:10:27.720 ship. Yes, yeah, you know. It was so gay. It 966 01:10:27.800 --> 01:10:31.880 was just like hilarious. We both eat ass and we started calling us the 967 01:10:32.079 --> 01:10:39.159 ass eating twins on the shelf. Yes, yes, um, thank you 968 01:10:39.199 --> 01:10:43.920 again for stopping by. Make sure you guys check out deeper discussions the conversation 969 01:10:44.000 --> 01:10:47.079 cards, especially if you're dating someone new. Cut all the bullshit, get 970 01:10:47.079 --> 01:10:49.760 it off the way from the beginning, okay, and that way nobody's watt 971 01:10:49.800 --> 01:10:54.520 in their time. Um follow me on the Gram at Stormy p Pea, 972 01:10:54.600 --> 01:10:57.840 at Chocolate chipp and Sip. Also thank you again to the se Constent House. 973 01:10:57.880 --> 01:11:00.239 If you're in the Atlanta area and looking for a place to court, 974 01:11:00.279 --> 01:11:02.439 your podcast, have an event, whatever, you definitely want to come down 975 01:11:02.520 --> 01:11:05.159 here and check it out. I love you guys, and if you don't 976 01:11:05.159 --> 01:11:11.079 remember anything else, please remember don't be a loser. Chooser. I love 977 01:11:11.159 --> 01:11:13.239 you and enjoy the rest of your day. See you next week. Peace, 978 01:11:19.119 --> 01:11:20.239 save as it ever was.