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Welcome to softcore History. Hello,
and welcome back to softcore History. It's

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officially spooky season Halloween horn Nights.
Now this is where Lightning Crash SFX.

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Yeah. I did an entire intro
for this, that's right, I forgot

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about we've done for the last You
did all this set deck to look at

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this. Subscribe to our YouTube so
you can see the glorious set deck got

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in here early spread some spider gorgeous, gorgeous. Actually just found these all

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throughout the studio. You probably,
to be honest, they were filled with

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Your main job was picking crickets out
of the webs. Yeah, you bet.

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We didn't have a cricket gin for
him anyway, Eli Whitney when you

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need him, and think about that
one. My name is Jake Goldman.

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I'm joined us always by my two
co hosts, Rob Fox and Dane Rojester.

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Before we get started today, I
just want to let you know about

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one thing our Patreon Paton dot com
slash software history. Oh I thought you're

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gonna talk about your sexual harassment allegations. No, okay, that's not this

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podcast, fair enough. Yeah,
one of the podcasts I listened to a

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lot of the few that I do. They're having some issues right now.

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So cool. Well, we would
never let you go because you control our

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finances and we couldn't if we wanted
to. You have access to the bank

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account. He really, he really, I would squeeze him out. Yeah,

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it's fine. It'd be incredibly easy. Do it. Squeeze me out.

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I just might fire me, do
it all right, if you're for

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it. No I'm not, but
yeah. Paton dot com slast software history

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two additional episodes every week. That's
eight total episodes or sometimes even more depending

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on the month. And uh,
it's five bucks man five bucks, eight

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episodes a month. You can't even
get lunch for that nowadays, you really

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can't. And it's sad. It's
a sad state of it. But you're

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getting like ten hours of extra content, all that content. But here's the

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thing, there's more. Wait what
literally, what what do you mean?

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Because there's a whole ass back catalog
of evergreen content, edburgh green content.

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So it's not just except when we
talk college football. Yeah, we may

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mention that everyone's a while zy bitches, but yeah, everything on the Patreon,

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everything on our main feed, everything
everywhere we do is evergreen except for

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this episode YouTube dot com software History
tell them Dan Sanchia, please subscribe.

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You can also go to software history
dot com and get some sick merch dance

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just in a little machine on shirts
Lately, I know I keep getting logged

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out of Shopify though, so yeah, we might have to that, but

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I want to he does it feel
like you're getting squeezed out. I want

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to start making shirts every week,
so let's have fun. Check out new

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merche every week. We're just gonna
let it rip, let it rip.

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All be on the lookout for me
and Jake. We might release our own

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pre workout. Yeah, you never
know Sky's limits. Substag muscle Holocaust,

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Yeah, anyway, but yeah,
check that out. Leave a review Apple

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iTunes. You know, you know
the deal that's all the house cleaning.

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Let's yeah, that was the house
cleaning. Yeah, so it is.

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Dan refers to it as Halloween Horrors. Well that's what it is. I'm

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tired of Halloween horrnnits don't with spooky
Halloween Horror month, Halloween Horror Month,

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yea, Halloween horror nights. I
mean, I went to school in Orlando,

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so universal did that. Yeah,
it's just that you like mush mouthed

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it. It just sounds like horror
horror nights. Yeah, just Halloween horrnnights,

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and a lot of people are We're
not gonna critique how I talk.

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Yeah, man, I remember Halloween
Hornites. We went actually last year for

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it, and it's still like the
dudes with the chainless chainsaws running around.

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Well, I pack a chainsaw,
you pack one that's getting that ass roll

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Jake, you should no, no, no no. It'd be funny if

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someone like just really hated someone else
that worked at Halloween Hornites and they did,

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like eventually at the end of OZ
spoiler alert, this episode came out

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like thirty years ago. But he
kills JK. Simmons with a real knife

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in a play like that. He
didn't mean to use it, but he

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the main character, didn't mean to
use it, but he did. It'd

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be funny if you just sorry they
were doing a play in prison. Yeah,

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Bloke vn HBO their shows if they
last too long, as we know

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from Game of Thrones, things get
kind of weird. And Jankie like The

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Wire, OZ was like the first
show, right, OZ was like the

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first show. Yeah, The Wire
the entire season where they do they follow

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a paper the news. Yeah exactly. But anyway, yeah, that'd be

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funny if someone just like affixed a
chain to the chainsaw, oh and just

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got like, oh, gonna go
out there and murder someone. Now,

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yeah, yeah, it'd be pretty
funny. I mean it probably a kid,

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so that's not funny, but not
so fun but yeah, no,

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you know, lately we've actually been
kind of veering into spooky topics. We

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talked about Gin not too long ago, and that's otherworldly. We talked about

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gnosticism and they're weird myths. By
Gin, he means Genie's not the alcoholic

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or not the liquor. Took It
took me a second even because I was

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like, oh, yeah, I
did do that episode. Well he's also

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done in an episode on Jamison Whiskey. Yeah, yes, and the horse.

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Now, to be clear, almost
every one of our episodes is horrifying.

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Yeah, it's like my episode on
Roman sexuality. It's really actually just

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a hall of nightmares. Political eunuchism
that isn't even part of it. Ye

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dudes getting fucking castrated. Yeah,
I know. I'm like, all right

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now we're doing the scary one.
No, I mean it's sometimes you just

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learned that a Unich made paper along
the way. You know, it's like,

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oh, that's cool, it's good. But uh yeah. Every now

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and then, though, we talk
about demons in Hell and all that stuff,

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and I bring up a little collection
of texts called the Key of Solomon.

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It's a magical grimoire filled with the
names of demons that were binded by

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none other than King Solomon himself to
build the Temple of Jerusalem, your guy,

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Yeah, the Temple of Solomon,
or maybe not the Temple of Jerusalem,

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but the Temple of Solomon. Solomon's
temple, Solomon's temple, Yeah,

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is not the one the Romans destroyed. I don't know, Okay, I

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don't. I don't know the history
of the temple, to be honest with

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you. What your history? Yeah, I can tell you the exact day

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the Vatican was built, Kenny,
and I can tell the exact day the

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Vatican is going to be destroyed.
That's more important. Probably, That's probably

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a really important day. Yeah,
that's when the sun goes black and the

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locusts come. There isn't eclipse coming
up this month. It's a lunar though.

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We have a Friday thirteenth, we
have a solar eclipse, and we

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have a super blue moon or blood
moon. We have super blood moon.

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Yes, we also next year in
October, I believe have a full eclipse

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over Austin, like a full solar
eclipse, which is the sun, you

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know, dark circle. You don't
have to explain it, we know.

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Okay, it'd be fun to just
like be a prophet that no one's impressed

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by, like just walk around Austin. Wouldn't work because this would just be

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a normal person in Austin. But
just go somewhere normal and just be like

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this guy will be black today and
then. But they're just like, yeah,

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we know it's science. Told us
science. That's like looks like apocalypto

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right when they were like waiting for
the eclipse. Yeah, it's like see

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good, we're good. You know
we're killing Yeah, tell him to tell

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him. We don't need to cut
anyone's heart's out anymore. God's happy.

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Yeah. No, I mean if
if no one knew about science, eclipse

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days would be the best day if
you knewbout him, because it like you're

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the one guy. Yeah, it's
just the purge. Really, science is

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out the window soon. Si.
Science is cyclical. It is I think

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it is. I think we're also
definitely in a state of like, uh,

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subjective reality, its objective. I
want to be alive long enough to

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take where believing in eclipse is just
an eclipse is a political belief. You

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think that's a fucking you think that's
the moon moving in between the sun.

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Can't wait, Yeah, I can't
wait. Well, yeah, the moon's

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a production. Everyone knows that it's
just that's hollow. I thought, right,

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well said it's a couple different made
of cheese robes. There's no way

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it could be hollow. What a
delicious what if it was made of cheese?

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And then you know the eclipse happen, which means it's getting fucking absolute

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direct sunlight. It just melted,
melting, scalding nacho cheese, just like

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just like nukes France, you know
what I mean, just dripping, Yeah,

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just too much dripped, just that
cheese beam. Yeah, it takes

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out the Vatican. Yeah, of
any country that could get nuked by cheese,

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France might be the most fitting the
US. Melted cheese that would make

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more scant yeah, just a cheddar. Yeah. Well, according to the

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non canonical text, we're going non
canonical today. Those are the good ones.

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Yeah, the Testament of Solomon.
Salomon used demon magic, goetic magic,

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you might call it. Basically,
what this means is spells to construct

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the Temple of Jerusalem. So it
is the Temple of Jerusalem. Actually,

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so he I'm reading them right now. What how high were you when you

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wrote this? Oh? I'm glad
you asked. You're like, can confirm

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a verry verry? You guys don't
right high? Come on the Hannibal episode

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on mushrooms. Yeah, you just
channeled Hannibal anyway. I gotta say,

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though, it kind of makes sense
that some people believe he actually did this

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with demons, not that demon.
Not that I think it makes sense that

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demons built the temple, but that
people will say anything not to give us

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credit for building things nicely. It
would be funny if he did straight up

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and slave demons instead of just having
you know, Jewish lave first do it,

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right. Yeah, No, aliens
did the pyramids, Demons did the

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temple in Jerusalem. Never juice,
never juice making nice buildings. No,

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it's fucked up. Man didn't do
the pyramids. So whatever, man like,

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that's confirmed. No pyramids, Yeah, okay, artisans whatever, Well,

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what's the difference. It's just made
up anyway. Yeah, the Temple

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of Jerusalem made by demons, apparently
according to the Testament of Solomon. Okay,

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so this was not the one destroyed
by the Romans, by the way,

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it was destroyed by Nebuchadnezzer and the
Babylonians. Classic fucking Babylonians tearing down

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our walls and stuff. I know, God damn Babylonian Blonians were the Jews

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Mongolians pretty much. Yeah, you
guys fucking hated the babylon Oh man,

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don't get me started on Babylon.
Well wiped him out. Good. Well,

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I don't know if you actually wiped
him out, but yeah, those

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they are gone. Those hanging gardens
ain't ship no, no, don't you

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know like how that works. They
have a whole like part in the Old

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Testament where they're just like King Cyrus
of Persia is the greatest king of all

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time and it's only because he conquered
the Babylonians and they were like finally were

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conquered by a nicer guy. Like
that's how grahmm it got. Yeah,

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00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:11,639
you gotta know, like when you're
praising another conqueror it's gotta be bad.

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The Persians were actually the good guys
in three hundred. They kind of were

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Spartans with the dicks. Yeah,
Spartans were the dicks. If you sparta

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00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:22,240
so overrated, it's not even fucking
well. We would throw babies off a

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cliff if they cry with wolves or
whatever. I get that. Yeah,

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no, that makes sense. Well
in most in the herd, yeah,

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you gotta, well, you gotta
cull the herd too to strengthen it.

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Getting conquered by Persia was pretty cool
though. They're just like, yeah,

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do whatever you want. I mean, just be yeah, just pay us.

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That's the kind of conquering that you
know. People are like, oh,

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taxes, It's like, do you
know how the other conquering works?

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Yeah, gets not on the stone. Well. In the Testament, of

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Solomon's most noteworthy passages, the text
describes how Solomon was n't able to build

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his temple by command ending demons by
means of a magical ring that was entrusted

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to him by the archangel Michael.
The ring, depending on where you read

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it, was either a hexagram or
a pentagram, so this is like the

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origin story for both of those.
Really a hexagram and a penagram. Yeah

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for being magically related, because people
use both in magical rituals. But scholarly

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opinion on when the Testament of Solomon
was written varies pretty widely. Despite texts

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claim to have been a firsthand account
of King Solomon's construction of the Temple of

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Jerusalem, it suggested dates for its
composition range anywhere between the end of the

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first century a d. And the
High Middle Ages, so we're not sure

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when it was written. Basically,
there's a lot of debate right now.

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So obviously take everything I say this
episode with a grain of salt. But

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you say this every episode. Not
trust you at all. It's already called

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00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:58,399
softcore history. Yeah, take everything
Jake says with the grain salt. That's

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00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:03,440
don't have to say that anymore.
You do it every time. We'll take

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00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:07,120
it with a grain of salt.
Please please, like we get it,

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00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:11,320
dude up here, bullshit and baby. So, now, though we are

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going to be largely talking about the
Key of Solomon today, the Testament of

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Solomon we are discussing right now sets
the stage for the existence of the key.

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But there's also a choice nug from
King Solomon himself in the Testament that

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I just had to share, and
this is it. While he describes how

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he bind the demons to bring him
different pieces of the temple in the aid

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of its creation, he also lays
out a nice little warning for everyone reading

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In it, he describes how he
fell in love with a Shunamite woman and

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agreed to worship rem Fan and Molok. Who are two demons. Oh,

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Molok, I've heard of Molok.
Molok's a big bad Yeah, for sure,

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Molok's not a good one. And
he agrees to worship them in exchange

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for sex with the lady. Well, you know, you know, sometimes

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you got to risk it all for
some Shunamite strange. Yeah, yeah,

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00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:03,120
you worry about it. Yeah,
you just nod, You're like, yeah,

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zodiac signs, I'm on Pisces.
Well, and then once you have

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that post not clarity, that's when
it really hits. Well, the post

202
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:16,960
not clarity is pretty crazy here.
Well, it's not postnut but close.

203
00:14:16,279 --> 00:14:22,120
So Salomon agrees to sacrifice to m
Fan and Malik. But at first he

204
00:14:22,120 --> 00:14:26,799
grabs five locusts and he crushes them
in his hands as an offering. Immediately.

205
00:14:26,919 --> 00:14:31,080
That's not that impressive, Nah,
it's not. But you know,

206
00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:33,720
really wasn't impressive. It's also a
dogshit offering. It's really bad. But

207
00:14:33,759 --> 00:14:37,960
you know who was even less impressed
than Malik and rem fan God? God?

208
00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:41,279
Yeah, God was probably not happy. Yeah, immediately upon crushing them

209
00:14:41,279 --> 00:14:43,519
for the two demons, the spirit
of God was just kind of like,

210
00:14:43,679 --> 00:14:46,960
you know what, I'm going to
head out. I'm out of here.

211
00:14:48,559 --> 00:14:54,559
And he departs Solomon's body, and
he becomes foolish to both men and demons

212
00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:56,960
and God himself. He appears foolish
to everyone around him. He has to

213
00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:01,840
get favor again from God, and
Salomon concludes the story by telling readers to

214
00:15:01,879 --> 00:15:09,159
not have beandoned their beliefs for sex
like he did. M you know they

215
00:15:09,159 --> 00:15:11,679
were so wise back then. Don't
give it away. I will give up

216
00:15:11,720 --> 00:15:16,000
on all my principles and everything I
believe in for like the right woman.

217
00:15:16,159 --> 00:15:20,440
Anna Darmis comes in. Is that
just yours? Now? Whatever you want

218
00:15:20,480 --> 00:15:22,840
me to believe in? Anna,
it's the accent really that gets me.

219
00:15:26,639 --> 00:15:28,559
Anna d Armis, Huh, that's
that's your one. I think that's your

220
00:15:28,559 --> 00:15:35,720
one. That's probably your one.
It's the combination everything build success. Yeah,

221
00:15:35,919 --> 00:15:39,679
yeah, yeah, so success seems
I didn't know you were into that.

222
00:15:41,919 --> 00:15:46,399
Yeah, you got a success thing. Yeah I guess not I'm on

223
00:15:46,480 --> 00:15:52,039
this fucking show. Or you're not
fucking anyone here, not yet. Okay,

224
00:15:52,759 --> 00:15:56,240
Oh boy, give us enough failure
to get those sexual harassment claims.

225
00:15:56,279 --> 00:15:58,639
Go it. Yeah, anyway,
it was Jake did it to Dan's I

226
00:15:58,679 --> 00:16:03,320
didn't you anything. You can clear
my name right now. You keep grabbing

227
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:06,840
my ass when I walk. Do
not touch your butt ever. I never

228
00:16:06,919 --> 00:16:10,879
touched your butt. Fact that,
the fact that you won't, yes,

229
00:16:10,919 --> 00:16:15,720
Saud of this joke is pretty sass. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You're

230
00:16:15,799 --> 00:16:22,240
right, Yes, I touched him. Cut that, don't do well.

231
00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:26,840
We going to Austin PD. Anyway, though, the main point of the

232
00:16:26,919 --> 00:16:30,519
Testament of Solomon is that he ran
into a couple of different demons. One

233
00:16:30,559 --> 00:16:34,320
of them in particular was Bielzebub.
He runs into all right, and he's

234
00:16:34,399 --> 00:16:38,320
able to using his ring as a
shield to protect himself with God's you know,

235
00:16:38,399 --> 00:16:44,759
divinity buying Bielsabub and get him to
start working for it. I would

236
00:16:44,759 --> 00:16:47,720
watch the ship out of this Constantine
prequel. Oh, it would be great.

237
00:16:47,799 --> 00:16:51,159
Are you kidding me? It's really
just it's kind of like Captain Planet

238
00:16:51,279 --> 00:16:55,559
meets like because he's got that,
but it's like almost like I'm just imagining

239
00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:59,159
like wonder Woman's golden lass out kind
of like get over here, Satan,

240
00:16:59,279 --> 00:17:03,720
get over here. As we know, Bielsabub is not Satan, it's not

241
00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:08,119
Lucifer. And we'll get a lot
more into Hellish hierarchy later. But he

242
00:17:08,240 --> 00:17:14,279
just says, like, Bill,
it's straight. Hey, like to pick

243
00:17:14,359 --> 00:17:17,720
up that rock, put it over
there, pretty much. Yeah, So

244
00:17:18,079 --> 00:17:19,599
he ran into a couple of different
demons. So Bielsabub kind of clued him

245
00:17:19,640 --> 00:17:22,920
in onto who the other demons roaming
around where, and he binded them all

246
00:17:22,960 --> 00:17:26,400
and so like yeah, what well, once you got him, the demons

247
00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:32,119
like got no honor amongst demons get
out. Really Yeah, you'd think they'd

248
00:17:32,119 --> 00:17:36,039
be a lot more tight. But
yeah, So I think he has Bielsabub

249
00:17:36,079 --> 00:17:38,680
help him get a column from under
the river. It's like underwater, it's

250
00:17:38,680 --> 00:17:41,839
a column that's like a beautiful obsidian. He has that become a part of

251
00:17:41,839 --> 00:17:45,440
the temple. He has another demon
like use a cornerstone that can't be lifted

252
00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:48,680
by men to become the cornerstone of
the temple. Basically uses them all for

253
00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:55,680
their magic to help him out.
I swear man this, Uh, there

254
00:17:55,680 --> 00:18:00,799
can't have been no Jews killed after
someone read this, like you literally,

255
00:18:00,839 --> 00:18:07,160
like an anti Semit reads about how
Solomon enslave demons to build your temple and

256
00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:10,759
that didn't send an already any Sematic
person over there, Like they're just like

257
00:18:11,599 --> 00:18:15,400
okay, okay, they're working with
demons. Yeah, like I've I've read

258
00:18:15,400 --> 00:18:18,799
it. I knew it. I
knew it. That's an allegory for other

259
00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:22,359
Jews, by the way, probably
no to them. Yeah right. Also,

260
00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:26,119
rob people that want to kill Jews, they don't need this, They

261
00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:30,680
really don't. They don't wait for
this to show up they have. This

262
00:18:30,720 --> 00:18:33,920
is actually what Saint Hitler over the
edge saw the Testament of Solomon on the

263
00:18:34,119 --> 00:18:38,200
edge, but this man and slave
demons. Yeah, well you might be

264
00:18:38,240 --> 00:18:41,480
asking, what does this have ever
anything to do with what we're talking about

265
00:18:41,519 --> 00:18:45,720
today. The Key of Solomon has
everything to do with it because it kind

266
00:18:45,720 --> 00:18:48,880
of sets the stage. I had
assumed. Yeah, so according to like

267
00:18:48,960 --> 00:18:52,440
receiving the city's key, No,
no, no, the key is the

268
00:18:52,519 --> 00:19:00,119
Key of Solomon is basically it's the
key on how to operate in binding.

269
00:19:00,680 --> 00:19:04,400
So it's like a key like an
index. It's an index exactly so.

270
00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:08,440
According to the mythical history of the
document, as recorded in its introduction,

271
00:19:08,920 --> 00:19:15,240
Solomon wrote the Key of Solomon for
his son Reheboem and commanded him to hide

272
00:19:15,279 --> 00:19:18,559
the book in his tomb upon his
death. This is how you get damn

273
00:19:18,559 --> 00:19:22,160
brown books. This would be a
great damn Brown book as well. Well.

274
00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:25,279
The Key of Solomon exists. You
can read it right now like I

275
00:19:25,359 --> 00:19:27,480
have it on my phone. There's
two. There's a greater and there's a

276
00:19:27,519 --> 00:19:32,119
greater and lesser Keys of Solomon.
But after many years, the book was

277
00:19:32,160 --> 00:19:36,279
discovered by a group of Babylonian philosophers
repairing Solomon's tomb. This is all according

278
00:19:36,319 --> 00:19:40,640
to lore. None could interpret the
text until one of them suggested that they

279
00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:45,160
should ask the Lord for understanding.
Well, ask their god. Yeah,

280
00:19:45,279 --> 00:19:48,759
I think ask your god, ask
their god whoever man. The God comes

281
00:19:48,759 --> 00:19:51,160
down and he's like, yeah,
this guy was a dick, So what

282
00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:52,960
do you want to know? And
then go with whatever answer you like better.

283
00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:59,039
You know, you might be onto
something. My dad's gonna say no,

284
00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:00,680
so I'll ask my mom. That's
pretty much it. Yeah, if

285
00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:03,640
you ask your God and you don't
like it, ask another just keep going

286
00:20:04,039 --> 00:20:07,680
anyway. They ask their God,
and the Angel of the Lord appears to

287
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:12,359
the translator and helps him. Oh, and the translator gives a promise that

288
00:20:12,359 --> 00:20:17,599
he would keep the text hidden from
the unworthy and the wicked, after which

289
00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:19,359
the Angel of the Lord allows them
to read it freely. And this is

290
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:23,200
where they say the translations of the
Keep Solomon come from. I'm gonna highly

291
00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:27,519
doubt that as a skeptic, but
that's where it's said to have come from.

292
00:20:27,519 --> 00:20:32,759
Basically, what they figured out is
that Solomon left his son rahel Boem

293
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:37,559
a manual for operating a demon ferrari
basically right like it was basically, Hey

294
00:20:37,559 --> 00:20:40,400
man, I made this for you. This is how to drive this sick

295
00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:42,880
car. Hey, if you ever
want to build dope shit, yeah,

296
00:20:44,079 --> 00:20:48,000
that's essentially it. So much of
keep a demon Ferrari. It's always in

297
00:20:48,039 --> 00:20:52,240
the shop, always in the shop
and in the parts. Or you have

298
00:20:52,279 --> 00:20:55,279
to get them from hell. You
do, shift from hell, you do.

299
00:20:55,559 --> 00:20:56,799
They're not made, They're not made
in your country. It's not even

300
00:20:56,880 --> 00:21:00,640
an easy oil change. There's a
lot of bureaucrat See two with demons come

301
00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:04,720
to find out, like a lot
demons have red tape out the ass sounds

302
00:21:04,759 --> 00:21:07,880
about right, and it is Hell. Right, it's Hell. And I

303
00:21:07,880 --> 00:21:11,079
think it's very funny that throughout the
Middle Ages, Like so, I'm I'm

304
00:21:11,119 --> 00:21:15,559
going off of the idea that all
this is actually written in the sixteenth seventeenth

305
00:21:15,559 --> 00:21:19,319
century, after the Renaissance. I
think it's I personally think it's inspired by

306
00:21:19,359 --> 00:21:22,440
a lot of the Renaissance stuff,
which is like, oh, the Kingdom

307
00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:23,880
of It, of Heaven is in
you, divinities in you. You know,

308
00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:27,799
it's the inner light, and they're
like trying to blend so that stuff.

309
00:21:27,839 --> 00:21:33,480
Jesus said, yeah, I mean, but but they get back to

310
00:21:33,519 --> 00:21:36,480
it a little bit. Yeah,
yeah, they I think what the key

311
00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:41,160
the Lesser and Greater Keith Solomon is
is it's trying to use like cabolistic magic,

312
00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:44,839
also blending, like it's up to
you and God's divinity. It's a

313
00:21:44,880 --> 00:21:48,160
lot of different pieces. Melbol I
will say, you'll probably find every good

314
00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:52,240
mechanic in hell, though, oh
yeah, like any good mechanics in hell?

315
00:21:52,359 --> 00:21:55,119
Have you Have you ever been to
a good auto shop and thought anyone

316
00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:57,680
there's gonna go to heaven? No? No, absolutely, even a bad

317
00:21:57,680 --> 00:22:03,119
auto shop. Yeah, they're actually
further down in Hell. There's different layers.

318
00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:07,119
Bad mechanics are further years. Yeah, that is an honest mechanic.

319
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:08,720
He's still in Hell. Yeah.
No, it's like he's just right.

320
00:22:08,839 --> 00:22:14,400
He's just knocking on purgatory. You
know. They're like, man, you

321
00:22:14,519 --> 00:22:17,839
murdered six people, but you never
lied about the cost of parts and labors.

322
00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:21,160
So you're tatted up. I'm sorry
you can't get into Heaven. You're

323
00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:25,039
not getting into Heven with a neck
tat. Absolutely not. People think that,

324
00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:29,440
so I guess, fools, it's
like going to a job interview.

325
00:22:30,839 --> 00:22:33,920
Heaven gotta wear a turtleneck. Hell
has bureaucracy, Heaven has job interviews.

326
00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:38,720
Life is a job interview for Heaven. Yeah that's stupid. Well that's your

327
00:22:41,920 --> 00:22:45,079
rolling into heaven. They're like,
what's a fun fact about you? We

328
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:48,400
know, we know everything, but
you tell us what you thinks you're fun

329
00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:49,720
for, Like, no, what's
one of your faults? Now? If

330
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:53,559
it actually is like some people think
where you have to roll the tape back

331
00:22:53,599 --> 00:22:57,720
with God and go over each play
of your life, Yeah that is hell.

332
00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:02,279
No, it's just God's like your
middle school coach, Like, no,

333
00:23:03,480 --> 00:23:04,640
so it fall flat on your face
here when you could have helped this

334
00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:07,160
old lady. Where were you at
there? Yeah? Man, there was

335
00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:11,200
a miss your opportunity here didn't hit
the whole hard enough. Yeah. There

336
00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:14,720
was a great short story I read
when I was in grade school, like

337
00:23:15,039 --> 00:23:17,960
SUC seven eighth grade, you know
how on like you're reading textbooks. They

338
00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:22,640
would be like stories essentially, like
short stories and stuff like that. So

339
00:23:22,759 --> 00:23:25,440
sometimes I'll get bored, bored as
fucking class and I just reread ahead and

340
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:26,720
I just like, I'm just gonna
read something. This is this class sucks

341
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:33,640
u. And one of the stories
was like it was basically like you waiting

342
00:23:33,680 --> 00:23:37,720
to get into heaven essentially, and
the way you were judged was like God

343
00:23:37,799 --> 00:23:42,039
can't judge you because he loves you. But I thought, only God can

344
00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:45,160
judge you. That's that's a lie. So what he does is he so

345
00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:48,079
many people have that tattooed on their
bodies. The well they're in hell too.

346
00:23:48,359 --> 00:23:51,799
They're in hell. Yeah, it's
fine. They like. Essentially,

347
00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:56,519
the theme is, or the the
story goes, was like God loves you

348
00:23:56,799 --> 00:24:00,000
infinitely, so he can't judge you, but he knows that he can't reward

349
00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:04,799
people for any type of behavior,
so he just uses judges throughout history as

350
00:24:04,839 --> 00:24:08,359
the judge, and he's the witness, and so they just ask him.

351
00:24:08,359 --> 00:24:12,519
They're like, give us a rundown
on his life, and so God like

352
00:24:12,559 --> 00:24:15,240
gives it, like he's not gonna
lie. He's just like, yeah,

353
00:24:15,279 --> 00:24:18,519
he's a nice guy. It was
like a bank robber who'd like killed through

354
00:24:18,559 --> 00:24:22,759
people and then got murdered by the
police went up and the guy was like,

355
00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:26,200
oh shit, God like explains when
I was like, yeah, I

356
00:24:26,279 --> 00:24:29,160
can't. I can't send you to
Hell. I love you, so I

357
00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:32,000
have to have someone else do it. Oh, God's your personal assistant.

358
00:24:32,079 --> 00:24:36,240
God outsources. Yeah, God outsources
the witness. So it's just like anything

359
00:24:36,279 --> 00:24:40,839
they ask him, he's just like
yeah, yeah, again. I just

360
00:24:41,119 --> 00:24:47,440
can't get behind the earthly like systems
of governance behind Hell and Heaven and every

361
00:24:47,440 --> 00:24:48,920
story you ever hear. It's like, I just don't think it would work

362
00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:52,920
that way, Like they used the
same thing we came up with as government,

363
00:24:53,359 --> 00:24:57,640
Like, no, I don't think
so. But essentially, the keepsaw

364
00:24:57,680 --> 00:25:04,000
him in his two books. Book
one contains conjurations, invocations, and curses

365
00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:08,359
to summon and constrained spirits of the
dead and demons of Hell. In order

366
00:25:08,400 --> 00:25:18,759
to compel them to do the operators
will. So it also describes how to

367
00:25:18,799 --> 00:25:22,519
find stolen items, become a visible, gain favor and love what so on.

368
00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:26,720
Yes, you can become invisible with
the help of a demon if you

369
00:25:26,759 --> 00:25:33,519
would like cool. Book two describes
various purifications, which the operator termed in

370
00:25:33,559 --> 00:25:37,640
the book exorcist. By the way, So you're called an exorcist when you're

371
00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:40,839
doing this. Oh, because you're
purified. Are you getting rid of the

372
00:25:40,880 --> 00:25:45,640
demons? You're exercising them up out
of hell into the space you want them

373
00:25:45,640 --> 00:25:48,920
to be. Just any place you
take a demon, any transportation of a

374
00:25:48,920 --> 00:25:52,839
demon is exorcist kind of. Yeah. Demon gets in a cab, you're

375
00:25:52,839 --> 00:25:56,039
exercising him. Yeah, well he's
getting some exercise. You take him on

376
00:25:56,079 --> 00:26:00,559
a walk, exercise in the demon. So yeah, it's basically about how

377
00:26:00,559 --> 00:26:03,559
you need to purify yourself before you
get into all this demon summoning, because

378
00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:06,119
like it's bad to not do it. It's gonna get it, it's gonna

379
00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:08,240
get real dirty. Yeah. So
it covers like the clothes you need to

380
00:26:08,279 --> 00:26:12,799
wear, how the magical implements used
in their operations should be constructed, and

381
00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:18,559
like what animal sacrifices should be made
to the spirits, things like that the

382
00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:22,240
lesser key of psalmon list in order
of seventy two demons that can be commanded.

383
00:26:22,519 --> 00:26:26,400
That's really important. Now, these
books are incredibly involved for the setup

384
00:26:26,640 --> 00:26:32,480
and for these rituals to go correctly, and by like, what I mean

385
00:26:32,519 --> 00:26:37,200
by complicated is like it's so fucking
complicated you would stop reading it. That's

386
00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:38,720
what happened to me. I was
like, it's just like dense, It's

387
00:26:38,799 --> 00:26:42,480
super dense. Man. So like
in my research on the book, the

388
00:26:42,559 --> 00:26:48,880
variables that are required for success are
like what where is the sun? Where's

389
00:26:48,920 --> 00:26:52,880
the moon? Where's Venus? Where's
Mercury? Like where's Jupiter? Like you

390
00:26:53,079 --> 00:26:56,720
have to have so every demon when
you're summoning it needs to have all these

391
00:26:56,759 --> 00:27:00,079
things in the correct place or they
won't show up, or they won't show

392
00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:03,759
up. And you need to be
lighting the right incense, you need to

393
00:27:03,799 --> 00:27:07,240
be doing the right geometric shapes.
You need to be like using the right

394
00:27:07,319 --> 00:27:11,279
kind of salt. So basically there's
sounds like the just a phone number but

395
00:27:11,359 --> 00:27:15,480
awful. Yeah, no, it
sounds like when you go out on a

396
00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:19,119
fishing trip and the guide is just
making up all these mistakes for why there

397
00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:23,559
was no bites. Yeah, it's
unlucky day. It's no, it's it's

398
00:27:23,599 --> 00:27:27,359
exactly that. It's a little choppy. Yeah, oh you didn't. You

399
00:27:27,359 --> 00:27:32,240
didn't light the siege before the you
put the amethyst in the cups. So

400
00:27:32,519 --> 00:27:34,400
yeah, it's right, that's why
that skeleton monkey didn't crawl out of that

401
00:27:34,440 --> 00:27:37,519
hole in the ground. Yeah no, I mean that's you actually described a

402
00:27:37,599 --> 00:27:42,720
demon. Wait, really there's Oh, there's descriptions and uh personalities for every

403
00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:45,359
demon. I'll go through a couple
of them later. I out not to

404
00:27:45,359 --> 00:27:48,279
sound racist, but I kind of
picture all demons to have roughly the same

405
00:27:48,319 --> 00:27:52,720
personality. They don't. They're all
very different. Okay, yeah, I

406
00:27:52,720 --> 00:27:55,759
didn't even plan this. I got
a bunch of demons on set. That's

407
00:27:55,799 --> 00:28:00,680
pretty cool. I actually wore this
to the sex the other day. You

408
00:28:00,759 --> 00:28:04,559
are you going back? Don't worry
about it, Okay, you just said

409
00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:08,160
anyway, there's so many variables that
are required for success in these spells that

410
00:28:08,200 --> 00:28:12,240
it would be really easy to describe
any non success to any one of the

411
00:28:12,279 --> 00:28:18,519
variables not being right, which is
handy for people that want to convince you

412
00:28:18,559 --> 00:28:21,559
it's real, right, Like you
go and it's like, Oh, you

413
00:28:21,599 --> 00:28:25,880
just need to practice harder and like
buy my magical rbs things like that.

414
00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:29,839
It's definitely a CD you'll get that
demon, right. But the variables,

415
00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:33,119
like I said, include planets,
incense, things like that. I think

416
00:28:33,119 --> 00:28:36,920
it's really important to note like why
they do these things too. I have

417
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:38,160
a big theory about what this really
is. I'll get to it at the

418
00:28:38,240 --> 00:28:45,039
end, but basically, yeah,
if you don't purify yourself, you're gonna

419
00:28:45,039 --> 00:28:48,000
get got by a demon. And
if you don't do everything correctly, it's

420
00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:52,119
not gonna work. So not only
do you have to do purification spells before

421
00:28:52,119 --> 00:28:56,119
all these demon spells as well,
those are also like incredibly time intensive and

422
00:28:56,119 --> 00:29:00,200
complicated. One of the big things, though I mentioned it earlier, is

423
00:29:00,240 --> 00:29:03,400
like the salt circles and the shapes
you have to draw. Yeah, I

424
00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:06,599
think it's pretty interesting because a lot
of like the shapes are one of the

425
00:29:06,640 --> 00:29:08,920
most important things, right. And
I think it's interesting because a lot of

426
00:29:08,920 --> 00:29:15,200
people say that Masonic like ritual is
based off of geometry, right, and

427
00:29:15,559 --> 00:29:21,279
that's based off of the Temple of
Jerusalem built Samson over here. Well,

428
00:29:21,279 --> 00:29:27,000
I've always said the most Satanic building
in the world the Pentagon. I mean

429
00:29:27,319 --> 00:29:33,440
many people would argue that just because
the shape alone, Now did your ritual,

430
00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:36,799
you can say, if you want, have any reference to the Temple

431
00:29:36,799 --> 00:29:41,039
of Solomon as a Freemason, Yeah, we didn't acknowledge it. Now really,

432
00:29:41,839 --> 00:29:44,519
I think you're just messing with me. But no, I mean,

433
00:29:44,559 --> 00:29:48,000
like there's a whole thing on,
like sacred geometry, how the space and

434
00:29:48,039 --> 00:29:51,759
proportions of different rooms can induce different
moods, things like that, and that's

435
00:29:51,799 --> 00:29:56,559
kind of what freemasonry takes from the
there's some linked here is what I'm trying

436
00:29:56,599 --> 00:29:59,119
to get to. I haven't like
uncovered it or I don't think that the

437
00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:03,000
saying that the space and proportion of
different rooms can make different moods is even

438
00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:07,079
controversial. No, For example,
if I shoved you and locked you in

439
00:30:07,079 --> 00:30:12,000
a closet, you would be in
a different mood then if you were sitting

440
00:30:12,039 --> 00:30:15,640
comfortably in a living room. But
you know the feeling like when you walk

441
00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:18,359
into a place with a really nice
like open atrium and you just feel different.

442
00:30:18,519 --> 00:30:22,319
Yeah, yeah, it's it's very
important. I think a lot of

443
00:30:22,359 --> 00:30:25,359
what we're gonna be talking about today, like a lot of the set and

444
00:30:25,440 --> 00:30:27,599
setting in the place of the stars
and stuff like that. That's all to

445
00:30:27,759 --> 00:30:32,240
induce a certain mood. Basically,
I'll get to like my big theory on

446
00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:36,200
it later. But one of the
demons I want to just talk about how

447
00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:38,079
insane this ship. As one of
the demons in the Lesser Key might be

448
00:30:38,119 --> 00:30:41,319
familiar to a couple of people listening
who enjoy horror films, that would be

449
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:45,759
King Payment of Hell, the eighth
demon on the list, King Payman,

450
00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:49,799
King, King Payman. He is
the named demon that the cult worshiped in

451
00:30:49,839 --> 00:30:55,079
the movie Hereditary. Oh yeah,
yeah, Payman. They all hail Payment.

452
00:30:55,119 --> 00:30:59,279
That is a very real demon.
I love Hereditary. Why do you

453
00:30:59,319 --> 00:31:02,960
hate that movie? Everyone was hyping
it up so much. It was good.

454
00:31:03,759 --> 00:31:04,839
It was fine. It was a
good horror movie. It was fine.

455
00:31:04,880 --> 00:31:07,279
It was a good horror movies aren't
good. It's not my it's not

456
00:31:07,359 --> 00:31:11,319
my my bag. Okay, well, it's very much my bag of all

457
00:31:11,359 --> 00:31:14,920
the horror movies I've seen. That's
a very footage movies or your bag.

458
00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:18,279
No, that's my guilty pleasure.
There's a difference. I have a bag

459
00:31:18,440 --> 00:31:22,640
and I have a guilty pleasure.
Corner right, turnaround and furiously watch intently.

460
00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:27,279
You don't like scary movies. He's
scared. Yeah, you get scared.

461
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:30,160
You hide your eyes, keep my
lad on. Scared boys, check

462
00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:33,359
your phone when it gets creepy so
you don't have to look. Yeah,

463
00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:37,480
he's just furiously scrolling. One of
the biggest stakes I ever made life,

464
00:31:37,759 --> 00:31:41,759
So I haven't had a very hard
life. I guess was coming home from

465
00:31:41,839 --> 00:31:48,279
some party or something in high school, turning on HBO, smoking weed and

466
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:52,279
watching twenty eight days Later, just
like as seventeen, extreme and extremely high.

467
00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:56,759
Oh that doesn't phaze me at all. Zombie movies are like whatever,

468
00:31:56,119 --> 00:32:00,640
Runners were a new thing. This
is this was the first Runner with Murphy

469
00:32:00,759 --> 00:32:06,079
right, Yeah, this was the
first Runner movie movie. Twenty tastes later.

470
00:32:06,119 --> 00:32:07,319
It's a good movie, and I
just remember being like, I mean,

471
00:32:07,519 --> 00:32:13,240
just white fucking knuckling the entire just
very high, being like, oh,

472
00:32:13,400 --> 00:32:15,920
this could be it. But I
didn't stop watching because the movie was

473
00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:19,519
dope. The movie's just good.
But I think I think the thing with

474
00:32:19,559 --> 00:32:22,480
like good horror movies is there good
movies despite the fact of their horror movie.

475
00:32:22,559 --> 00:32:25,200
Yeah. I will say this about
Hereditary, It was a horror movie

476
00:32:25,200 --> 00:32:28,680
first, not a movie first.
Yea, yeah, no for sure.

477
00:32:28,720 --> 00:32:30,880
But I think it's the closest like
it is true horror, Like it's a

478
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:35,240
true horror movie. But I think
it was tastefully done. I thought,

479
00:32:35,319 --> 00:32:38,599
like Tony Collette did a good job, and Tony Collette tastefully decapitate herself with

480
00:32:38,680 --> 00:32:43,880
piano wire. Yeah, spoiler alert, No, it's tastefully done. It

481
00:32:43,920 --> 00:32:46,400
was the right amount of gore,
of tastefuls, the right way put it.

482
00:32:46,519 --> 00:32:51,200
Definitely more tasteful than how the kid
got got with the telephone post.

483
00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:53,400
That was pretty funny. I laughed
at that because I honestly I laughed out

484
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:55,640
loud because I was like, wait, what is happening in this movie?

485
00:32:55,640 --> 00:33:00,680
And then all of a sudden,
like the fucking gooney girl who like was

486
00:33:00,759 --> 00:33:07,039
she mentally ill or something? Like
they just cast like a very interesting looking

487
00:33:07,200 --> 00:33:10,960
actress or something, and like,
yeah, she just gets decapitated out of

488
00:33:12,119 --> 00:33:15,240
nowhere. Yeah, it's great after
a party. Listen, that's life.

489
00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:19,720
That is life. The beat,
life beat like that. Sometimes sometimes on

490
00:33:19,799 --> 00:33:22,000
the water someone just gets their head
chopped clean off. Sometimes you go down

491
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:27,240
a slide at Schlitterbond, you don't
come back with a head. A kid

492
00:33:27,960 --> 00:33:31,160
Anyway, after the movie came out, people just wanted to summon payment too

493
00:33:31,240 --> 00:33:35,160
soon. This is the years ago. It's like ten years ago, wasn't

494
00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:38,440
it. Yeah, it's like the
kid that got his fucking head punted off

495
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:44,240
when he got went to retrieve his
hat from a leg dangling from a roller

496
00:33:44,319 --> 00:33:49,000
coaster. Oh dude, yeah,
don't do that. You shouldn't do that,

497
00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:52,400
just you lose the hat man.
To be fair, here's the difference.

498
00:33:52,759 --> 00:33:57,000
Roller coaster kid, don't walk under
a roller coaster. That's insane.

499
00:33:57,000 --> 00:34:00,839
Schlitterbond kid. But what slitterbon kid
was like, Okay, I'm getting on

500
00:34:00,880 --> 00:34:02,720
this ride, and they're like,
I trust that this ride is safe to

501
00:34:02,759 --> 00:34:07,720
go. I designed myself, no, no design degree whatsoever. I'm not

502
00:34:07,759 --> 00:34:10,599
even an engineer. What if it's
a really dope hath though together, Oh

503
00:34:10,599 --> 00:34:14,679
that's true. True, it could
be lucky true true, or a lucky

504
00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:16,639
hat. Well it's not. Well
he wasn't wearing it. Well, that's

505
00:34:16,639 --> 00:34:20,360
why it was unlucky at that point. I like to think he actually got

506
00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:22,920
to it. You got the hat
and then stood up and was like a

507
00:34:24,599 --> 00:34:28,559
final destination. Was that a real
thing? Though? Is this an urban

508
00:34:28,599 --> 00:34:31,400
myth? Urban legend. I'm pretty
sure somebody's got their head punted off.

509
00:34:31,760 --> 00:34:35,760
I don't think that's true. I
don't think that's fit the physics back that

510
00:34:35,880 --> 00:34:37,920
up. It could have died.
I don't think it was decapitated though,

511
00:34:39,400 --> 00:34:44,519
I'm just looking now. Head kicked
off. My rule kid was had did

512
00:34:44,559 --> 00:34:47,800
not deserve it, and but and
it did have some measure of decapitation.

513
00:34:49,039 --> 00:34:52,800
Yeah, team decapitated at six Flags
over Georgia. Yeah, this was in

514
00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:53,920
two thousand and eights, is a
while back, but yeah, it happened.

515
00:34:54,480 --> 00:34:59,280
Geez. Yeah, It's not a
good way to go anyway. All

516
00:34:59,320 --> 00:35:01,719
the fucking edge Lord goth kids,
I imagine, wanted to summon Payman after

517
00:35:01,760 --> 00:35:06,800
this because they saw it in a
movie. Which, if you want to

518
00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:07,920
do this stuff, I guess it's
fine. I don't think you're actually gonna

519
00:35:07,960 --> 00:35:12,159
do anything, but I think it's
probably not good for people. They won't

520
00:35:12,199 --> 00:35:15,960
be self aware enough for this.
But if you have mental issues, probably

521
00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:19,159
don't fuck around with this stuff because
you're gonna start believing it. Yeah,

522
00:35:19,320 --> 00:35:22,480
yeah, just don't don't mess with
this show. Is Payment related to Hayman

523
00:35:22,119 --> 00:35:27,039
Hayman? No, okay, they're
not Hayman. We don't even I'm not

524
00:35:27,079 --> 00:35:31,119
even supposed to say his name.
Oh that's the that's the Pyrum guy.

525
00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:36,760
Yeah, Hayman. Yeah, but
sudden little old boord action. Yeah,

526
00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:39,719
just we spit when you say his
name. He's like our Sherman juice.

527
00:35:39,760 --> 00:35:43,519
Oh for the South. Yeah,
that's funny. Yeah. You ever you

528
00:35:43,559 --> 00:35:46,840
ever say Sherman in the South and
someone spits, Uh, I think I

529
00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:51,360
yelled. I think it's died out. I definitely dunked on an Old Miss

530
00:35:51,519 --> 00:35:54,480
when I was at Missouri played at
Old miss in twenty thirteen when we went

531
00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:58,159
to the game because we wanted to
see the grove and everything, and uh,

532
00:35:59,000 --> 00:36:00,440
some fucker. That was the time
I ever been called a Yankee and

533
00:36:00,519 --> 00:36:05,239
anger, m that's a layman soul. And I was just like, we

534
00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:07,840
won that war. But I didn't
bring up Sherman in particular anytime I shoot,

535
00:36:07,880 --> 00:36:10,360
I'm mortar at one of my Southern
friends, I yell, Sherman,

536
00:36:12,679 --> 00:36:17,280
that's a good call. So a
bunch of people decided to interview some witches

537
00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:21,280
to figure out how hard it would
be to actually go through the go Ettic

538
00:36:21,360 --> 00:36:23,000
magic of summoning payment. And this
is a quote from one of the witches

539
00:36:24,199 --> 00:36:27,880
quote. One of the things that
you're supposed to do, specifically with the

540
00:36:27,960 --> 00:36:30,639
Key of Solomon, is that you
have a magical circle drawn around you,

541
00:36:30,719 --> 00:36:32,239
and this is the most important thing. And you have to have a triangle

542
00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:36,239
set up just outside of that,
and you're wearing the sigil of the demon

543
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:38,360
you're trying to summon. You'll put
that sigil into the triangle as well,

544
00:36:38,719 --> 00:36:42,840
and then the demon is supposed to
appear within that triangle. If you do

545
00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:45,880
it really, really right. Supposedly
you're supposed to see a physical form appear

546
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:50,400
in front of you. You should
physically see a demon at some point.

547
00:36:50,679 --> 00:36:52,920
I cannot comment on that, but
that's allegedly what happened. And then you

548
00:36:53,039 --> 00:36:58,280
shout that is a feather stiff as
a board. That is a feather stiff

549
00:36:58,280 --> 00:37:02,639
as a board. That's what's started
the Salem witch draw. Slumber party games

550
00:37:04,239 --> 00:37:08,320
got him out kind of. It
was bitchy girls. Yeah. To continue

551
00:37:08,320 --> 00:37:12,400
the quote, you may even have
to do some demon managing, as Payment

552
00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:15,639
is listed as one of the four
Kings of Hell in earlier gramoirs, who

553
00:37:15,679 --> 00:37:19,199
some say must be appealed to in
the correct order to ensure they obey the

554
00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:22,320
magic practitioner, continuing the quote,
I know that's a long one. This

555
00:37:22,360 --> 00:37:27,719
type of conjuration of spirits can involve
a potentially complex navigation of the bureaucracies of

556
00:37:27,760 --> 00:37:30,679
hell, compelling lesser spirits did do
once bidding by resort to the names of

557
00:37:30,719 --> 00:37:35,559
their superiors. And if there's one
thing that makes me believe any of this

558
00:37:35,559 --> 00:37:38,559
is out there is actually like a
fucking bureaucracy of Hell. So get this.

559
00:37:39,159 --> 00:37:43,239
You call up like a lesser demon
right right, You're like, all

560
00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:47,159
right, make me invisible. He's
like, I'd love to, but I'm

561
00:37:47,239 --> 00:37:52,920
like one of thirty six legion to
another guy. You gotta call my manager

562
00:37:52,119 --> 00:37:55,440
and then he's calling a sign off. Yeah, he's gotta like sign it

563
00:37:55,480 --> 00:38:00,039
and duplicate and also like I'm here, he's not. You gotta do a

564
00:38:00,039 --> 00:38:02,480
whole different things. You need at
least three forms of identificyess right now.

565
00:38:02,599 --> 00:38:07,760
Oh you're burning Paulo Santo. Oh
this is not he's not coming, man,

566
00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:12,559
he's not showing up today, Like
you gotta start next week. Payment

567
00:38:12,599 --> 00:38:17,760
doesn't get out of bed for anything
less than frankincense and Mars in retro grade.

568
00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:22,159
And if you bring apparently, if
you don't offer something good enough,

569
00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:25,880
they'll just fuck your life up.
Like if like they'll figure out like,

570
00:38:25,920 --> 00:38:29,679
oh man, you really came with
the wrong shit, and they'll like also

571
00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:30,760
be like, if he came with
the wrong shit, you probably didn't do

572
00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:35,559
the protection spell, right, So
I'm gonna ruin his life. That's funny.

573
00:38:35,679 --> 00:38:39,360
Yeah, so maybe come here.
Yeah, not for the right reasons.

574
00:38:39,519 --> 00:38:44,039
So yeah, yeah, there's gonna
be hell to pay. So a

575
00:38:44,119 --> 00:38:47,840
lot of theologians have tried to assign
a hierarchical system based on the titles across

576
00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:52,440
many different grim wars, including the
Key that I mentioned earlier. Most grimoires

577
00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:55,519
today that you hear about again that's
just a collection of demons and how to

578
00:38:55,559 --> 00:39:01,159
control them, are inspired by the
kIPS. Though. Yeah, like everyone

579
00:39:01,239 --> 00:39:05,400
steals ip. Yeah, this is
some of the oldest stuff. A lot

580
00:39:05,440 --> 00:39:07,719
of people would be like, this
is just total bullshit, but I mean

581
00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:09,800
it comes from somewhere like and this
is one of the older ones we have.

582
00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:15,119
But most important to note is that
all of these theologians disagree on everything

583
00:39:15,639 --> 00:39:20,320
as they do because they're talking about
how to rank demons from a book that

584
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:25,199
was either written in one thousand or
you know, fifteen hundred one thousand BCS,

585
00:39:25,559 --> 00:39:31,039
yeah, or fifteen hundred eighty yeah, right, So who t I

586
00:39:31,239 --> 00:39:36,159
l today? I learned I didn't
know this that the height of the Kingdom

587
00:39:36,199 --> 00:39:38,679
of Israel was one thousand BC.
I knew that. I actually didn't even

588
00:39:38,679 --> 00:39:43,519
know that the height of it was
under David and Solomon, but I definitely

589
00:39:43,599 --> 00:39:45,400
didn't realize they were that old.
I thought they were like eight hundred and

590
00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:49,440
seven hundred, maybe in the six
hundreds. I didn't realize they were one

591
00:39:49,599 --> 00:39:53,639
thousand BC. It's like having a
dynasty during the Pole era of sports,

592
00:39:53,639 --> 00:39:58,000
like Nebraska. No one cares anymore. It's just like, I think they

593
00:39:58,079 --> 00:40:00,280
got a BCS in there ne brasketed. Yeah, I think they did.

594
00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:04,840
You might be writing like two thousand
or something like late ninety eight, may

595
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:10,639
you think, Eric Crouch? Yeah, yeah, you're right. But yeah,

596
00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:15,599
someone finally did their best to sum
it up across all these different grandmoires

597
00:40:15,679 --> 00:40:20,519
and theologians, and these are the
seven distinct titles of all the positions you

598
00:40:20,519 --> 00:40:22,639
can have in hell, and how
they got them these demons. Right,

599
00:40:23,159 --> 00:40:30,039
So there's kings, princes, dukes, marquis, counts, presidents. So

600
00:40:30,119 --> 00:40:35,480
that's six and there's one night.
There's only one night of how I don't

601
00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:38,480
want to fuck with that guy who's
the night Fercus? Okay, Fercus,

602
00:40:38,559 --> 00:40:43,480
So that sounds like a nightly name. That sounds like somebody who's like from

603
00:40:43,519 --> 00:40:47,199
Flanders or France or something like that. Fercus. You fucking enough, Fercus.

604
00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:51,960
I'm not scared of Fercus. Fergus
is going to rip your spine out

605
00:40:52,000 --> 00:40:53,639
of your back. Guys, we
can't say his name too anymore times.

606
00:40:53,639 --> 00:40:59,599
Fercus, Frales, Fercus, Fercus, Fercus. Come on, I'm just

607
00:40:59,679 --> 00:41:02,360
kidding. You're not summoning anything right
now, You're totally fine. I brought

608
00:41:02,360 --> 00:41:06,280
my salt. I'm good. You
got some salt to throw around? Yeah?

609
00:41:06,400 --> 00:41:08,119
Yeah, you have the salt shotgun? Did you actually load it?

610
00:41:08,480 --> 00:41:13,800
Yeah? It's kind of funny to
me that demons are essentially just ethereal slugs.

611
00:41:14,000 --> 00:41:16,960
They just don't like salt. Yeah, like what happens like just salt

612
00:41:17,039 --> 00:41:22,719
it? Why why salt too?
I know, like table salt actually hold

613
00:41:22,760 --> 00:41:27,440
the police. I'm actually why do
demons? You gotta figure this out.

614
00:41:27,519 --> 00:41:34,440
Demons salt? It's more evil spirits, it's not necessarily demons. Uh yeah,

615
00:41:34,440 --> 00:41:37,079
why salt used to get rid of
ghosts and keep out demons? Literally

616
00:41:37,119 --> 00:41:43,960
this Uh why exactly? No one
can be sure. No one knows,

617
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:47,079
No one knows. There's a bunch
of different answers, right. Uh what

618
00:41:47,159 --> 00:41:53,920
if it's just deployed by big Salt, Dude, Big Salt. Hey,

619
00:41:54,679 --> 00:41:58,920
it's like you get rid of demons
for you. You find out that Morton's

620
00:41:59,000 --> 00:42:00,880
is like hobby lobby in Chick fil
A. It's just owned by this hyper

621
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:05,960
Christian. He's like, you know
what, everyone would really lack buying our

622
00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:09,480
salt for scared enough to demons.
That should be the first thing advertised in

623
00:42:09,519 --> 00:42:13,559
Mississippi that it does. Yeah,
put it on your food. It'll keep

624
00:42:13,559 --> 00:42:16,960
the demons out of your belly.
Yeah. If y'all lack flavor and hate

625
00:42:16,960 --> 00:42:22,719
the devil, drive Morton salt.
Yeah. Apparently it originates from Buddhism or

626
00:42:22,719 --> 00:42:25,960
Shintuism, where salt is used to
pre purify or sancify places and ward off

627
00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:30,320
evil spirits. That still doesn't explain
anything. No, that just kicks it

628
00:42:30,360 --> 00:42:35,199
down the road to ship. Also
puts it on religions that Christianity does not

629
00:42:35,360 --> 00:42:37,880
care about. Yeah. Yeah,
so it's pretty bad. That's a dumb

630
00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:40,480
answer. And whoever wrote that was
wrong. But okay, so here's how

631
00:42:40,480 --> 00:42:44,800
they all got their titles. The
kings of Hell were those angels who were

632
00:42:44,800 --> 00:42:47,760
closest to Lucifer when he led the
rebellion against God Almighty in heaven. They

633
00:42:47,800 --> 00:42:51,719
were promised their own crowns if the
attacks succeeded, but it did not,

634
00:42:52,079 --> 00:42:53,960
And when all the rebelling angels were
cast out of Heaven and Lucifer was made

635
00:42:53,960 --> 00:42:59,159
emperor of his own infernal dominion,
these angels received kingdoms of their own in

636
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:02,559
Hell to rule, and they got
the king level as recognition of their loyalty

637
00:43:02,599 --> 00:43:08,000
for being day one. So Lucifer
is emperor. Yes, Lucifer's emperor.

638
00:43:08,119 --> 00:43:10,400
Okay, well, like, I
mean, that's not really like a title

639
00:43:10,760 --> 00:43:15,400
like these are all the demons below
Lucifer. But princes were demons that were

640
00:43:15,400 --> 00:43:21,039
powerful angels who joined the rebellion in
heaven just a little. They needed a

641
00:43:21,079 --> 00:43:23,360
little convincing. They were Day two. They did not quickly follow Lucifer,

642
00:43:23,440 --> 00:43:29,239
but received rewards in Hell according to
the attributes they possessed as angels. Dukes

643
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:31,519
of Hell were the many angels who
joined the rebellion after seeing how many of

644
00:43:31,519 --> 00:43:37,000
the higher and more powerful angels had
already begun the assault, so most of

645
00:43:37,039 --> 00:43:39,079
the fallen angels were granted the title
of duke and recognition of their service to

646
00:43:39,159 --> 00:43:44,920
Lucifer. But they're like, oh, man, like Jim and Accounting is

647
00:43:45,079 --> 00:43:47,119
joining. Fuck, I gotta get
on that man. He's a doer.

648
00:43:47,199 --> 00:43:52,480
He's a smart guy. He's a
doer. Marquis of Hell rebelled against God

649
00:43:52,519 --> 00:43:54,960
after learning of the promises that Lucifer
had made. So the kings and the

650
00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:59,760
princes and the dukes, they all
got these promises like hey, yeah,

651
00:43:59,800 --> 00:44:01,360
you're you're in. It's like it's
kind of like a pyramid scheme really,

652
00:44:01,440 --> 00:44:06,559
Like it's just kind of like you
bought Facebook when it was at like one

653
00:44:06,639 --> 00:44:10,239
hundred and ten. Yeah, you
still make good money. Yeah we're getting

654
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:13,760
lower on the tone and pulled up. But yeah, you know you weren't.

655
00:44:13,760 --> 00:44:16,360
You didn't buy Facebook stock at fifteen
dollars or something. Now, counts

656
00:44:16,440 --> 00:44:21,039
of Hell are completely different than anything. They didn't join because they believed in

657
00:44:21,119 --> 00:44:25,880
Lucifer. They just I think counselor
gin. I think councer gin. Really,

658
00:44:27,159 --> 00:44:30,280
because these demons joined solely out of
their hatred for mankind and jealousy over

659
00:44:30,320 --> 00:44:35,480
God's love for man. Oh,
which is genis that's genies. Gin.

660
00:44:35,679 --> 00:44:40,639
We're like, what if you don't
remember the Gin episode? In Islam,

661
00:44:40,679 --> 00:44:50,079
it's believed that genies were made before
people were, and they are there the

662
00:44:50,079 --> 00:44:52,360
element they were made from his fire. Yeah, there's the element humans were

663
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:55,480
made from. Is dirt or mud
or whatever. I mean, this is

664
00:44:55,480 --> 00:45:00,519
in the Koran as far as I
know, and essentially the Gin. Rightfully,

665
00:45:00,639 --> 00:45:04,519
I think if you're made of fire, We're like, why does God?

666
00:45:04,599 --> 00:45:08,320
Why does a law like these mud
people more than they like us glorious

667
00:45:08,320 --> 00:45:13,719
fire people. Yeah, mud puts
off fire, dude, that's true.

668
00:45:13,760 --> 00:45:16,920
Mud beats fire. Mud does be
fire because it's wet unless check it out.

669
00:45:17,480 --> 00:45:24,559
The genies turned those mud people into
pots they can like, they killed

670
00:45:24,679 --> 00:45:29,159
them, they killed they killed them, they killed them, they've killing them.

671
00:45:29,400 --> 00:45:35,079
Yeah, yeahs turn us into pottery. Yeah. The night Furcus,

672
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:37,199
he's the only night in hell.
He was an angel who loved magic above

673
00:45:37,239 --> 00:45:42,400
all, but was prevented from practicing
dark arts by the holy powers. Lucifer

674
00:45:42,440 --> 00:45:45,920
promised him the ability to increase his
knowledge of all magical systems and to propagate

675
00:45:45,960 --> 00:45:49,719
them across the Earth and recognition of
his vow, Lucifer appointed Fercus as his

676
00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:53,119
soul knight. He's kind of like
the guy spreading the gospel of Like,

677
00:45:53,239 --> 00:45:58,719
dude, dark shit. So if
I can just ask a question for a

678
00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:04,079
second, sure telling me this angel
essentially had hobbies. Yeah, he liked

679
00:46:04,079 --> 00:46:07,679
to practice match Yeah, but Heaven
was like, no, that hobby's not

680
00:46:07,760 --> 00:46:12,079
really allowed here, and Satan was
like, hey, I'll let you do

681
00:46:12,119 --> 00:46:17,519
your He's just Palpatine recruiting Anakin pretty
much. Yeah. And then there's the

682
00:46:17,599 --> 00:46:23,800
last role. President is like the
lowest in Hell. So presidents of Hell,

683
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:28,480
we're servants to the higher angels who
rebelled against God and we're cast out

684
00:46:28,519 --> 00:46:30,400
of Heaven for following their leaders into
battle. They were the biggest lackeys of

685
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:35,320
them all. Okay, yeah,
they were not directly loyal to Lucifer,

686
00:46:35,360 --> 00:46:37,599
just their superiors, so they were
given the lowest rank amongst the fallen angels,

687
00:46:37,719 --> 00:46:40,000
and Lucifer's like, yeah, you
just kind of worked for these guys.

688
00:46:40,119 --> 00:46:45,199
Yeah. I think every president in
hell's the lowest person there too.

689
00:46:45,760 --> 00:46:50,400
Yeah. Fucking Americans fucking hate the
president, that's right, man, Which

690
00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:54,119
president doesn't matter, just fucking hate
them. Hate the government, Hate presidents,

691
00:46:54,920 --> 00:47:00,360
hate judges, hate them all real
quick. Before we get back to

692
00:47:00,360 --> 00:47:04,519
those demons, we need to talk
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693
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694
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698
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700
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701
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702
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703
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706
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707
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708
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715
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716
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717
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719
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722
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729
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730
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731
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Lot Dan Rejester do. But uh, tight T shirts are out, Rob.

732
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733
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734
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I rage when shirts are too long, are too short, I mean

735
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736
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I do, but I gotta have
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737
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sure, for sure covering up all
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738
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When I take off that pump cover,

739
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I blow the gym's mind, or
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740
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741
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off of the mAbs, off the
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742
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of a pec man. He's definitely
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743
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786
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comfy, it's spooky. I'm gonna
go through some descriptions some demons now too,

787
00:52:52,400 --> 00:52:54,639
just because I thought you guys would
be interested. Yeah, I want

788
00:52:54,639 --> 00:52:59,360
to hear about demons. Okay.
So the first demon listed in the grimoire

789
00:53:00,239 --> 00:53:07,800
ball bal depending on what be al
b aal bow is life brou He has

790
00:53:07,840 --> 00:53:12,280
described as a horseley voiced king with
the power to make men invisible, ruling

791
00:53:12,280 --> 00:53:15,639
over sixty six legions of demons.
Damn yeah, it's a lot of demons.

792
00:53:15,920 --> 00:53:19,840
He's got well legions a thousand,
right, so he's got an army

793
00:53:19,880 --> 00:53:22,440
of sixty six thousand. He's spreading
himself thin. No way, he's having

794
00:53:22,480 --> 00:53:27,360
these day to day interactions with his
troops. Well, no, but needed

795
00:53:27,360 --> 00:53:30,800
it, you know, Napoleon or
Patent. No, he talked every single

796
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:37,199
one the players like good job.
Battle doesn't start to none of his battles

797
00:53:37,199 --> 00:53:40,360
start to, like eight PM,
all of them. Victor, how's the

798
00:53:40,440 --> 00:53:45,920
family? What are you doing?
The lesser key of Solomon describes bal As

799
00:53:46,000 --> 00:53:51,320
appearing in the form of a cat, toad man, some combination of them,

800
00:53:51,480 --> 00:53:53,599
or other diverse shaves a horse.
He's as a horse voice, so

801
00:53:53,639 --> 00:53:58,800
it's just like a cat toad like
hops up and he's like, do you

802
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:02,000
want to be invisible? Pretty much? Yeah? You want to see what

803
00:54:02,039 --> 00:54:05,840
it looks like? Yeah? Is
what he looks like? Yeah? Pretty

804
00:54:05,880 --> 00:54:08,599
gross? Yeah, he kind of
looks like Charles. He does look like

805
00:54:08,679 --> 00:54:15,079
King Charles a little bit, doesn't
he? No? Is it the toad

806
00:54:15,119 --> 00:54:20,159
and cat head that throw it off? Kind of looks like he does look

807
00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:23,119
let me say again, Yeah,
dance right. He looks like Latimer Putin.

808
00:54:23,159 --> 00:54:27,320
He does look like Putin. Yeah. Uh, I'm just going like

809
00:54:27,400 --> 00:54:30,119
one demon for each rank. So
there's Duke A. Garris. He is

810
00:54:30,239 --> 00:54:35,159
under the power of the East.
He's described as an old man riding upon

811
00:54:35,199 --> 00:54:37,039
a crocodile and carrying a hawk on
his fist. I swear to God,

812
00:54:37,079 --> 00:54:40,079
if this guy looks like jan Pin, I'm gonna lose my mind. I

813
00:54:40,119 --> 00:54:45,960
will find a picture him. Garris
does not look like Jean Ping. Let

814
00:54:46,039 --> 00:54:50,000
me see. I'll be the judge
of that. The Garriss does not look

815
00:54:50,039 --> 00:54:57,000
like chi j Ping let me see. Okay, but they do both have

816
00:54:57,239 --> 00:55:01,360
tails. That's the crocodile's now,
that's mau man. I don't know.

817
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:07,480
That mustache is pretty uh, Mussolini. He might be Mussolini anyway, this

818
00:55:07,519 --> 00:55:09,280
guy's my favorite because you're riding a
crocodile and that's how he's supposed to show

819
00:55:09,360 --> 00:55:13,159
himself in your fucking magic circle.
I'd be I mean, that's dope.

820
00:55:13,239 --> 00:55:15,000
Yeah. By the way, my
favorite thing I forgot to chime in on

821
00:55:15,039 --> 00:55:21,440
this was that the witch was like, now, a lot of the summoning

822
00:55:21,519 --> 00:55:25,679
involves sort of demon management. It's
like, yeah, obviously, if you

823
00:55:25,800 --> 00:55:30,800
summon a demon, you're gonna have
to like be managing that demon. Yeah,

824
00:55:30,840 --> 00:55:32,599
of course, like you got to
talk to them very directly apparently.

825
00:55:32,679 --> 00:55:37,199
Yeah, Like you can't like mince
words or else will be like what fuck

826
00:55:37,280 --> 00:55:38,719
you? Like, they'll just ruin
your life. Yeah, I don't want

827
00:55:38,719 --> 00:55:44,440
to micromanage a demon. You have
to be very specific or else they find

828
00:55:44,480 --> 00:55:46,000
loopholes. That's the whole thing.
What do you just bring them up and

829
00:55:46,000 --> 00:55:58,400
they're like, you're just like,
suck my dick. Interpret that. They'd

830
00:55:58,440 --> 00:56:02,920
probably be like then balls, just
like a toad or cats. You want

831
00:56:02,960 --> 00:56:07,559
to toad head or the cat head? Yeah, like toad obviously, good

832
00:56:07,599 --> 00:56:09,840
lord, we want a demon in
the sack, that's true. You want

833
00:56:09,840 --> 00:56:15,159
to angel in the streets. But
a demon in the sheets. Yeah yeah,

834
00:56:14,880 --> 00:56:17,880
uh but yeah, So a Garris
teaches languages, He stops and retrieves

835
00:56:19,000 --> 00:56:22,920
runaway persons, which is interesting,
like why does he do that? Well,

836
00:56:22,960 --> 00:56:27,119
that used to be a profitable business. You can ask William Travis.

837
00:56:27,480 --> 00:56:35,400
You ask Big Milk. Those cartons. Those cartons will get you. Imagine

838
00:56:35,400 --> 00:56:38,039
a demon just coming up with a
milk carton. He uh, would be

839
00:56:38,079 --> 00:56:42,639
funny. It'd be funny if Milk
has been doing that since before the Civil

840
00:56:42,639 --> 00:56:45,400
War. And I just used to
be runaway. It just wanted posters on

841
00:56:45,440 --> 00:56:49,119
the milk. And then after all
the slaves are free, they were like,

842
00:56:49,119 --> 00:56:52,239
well we gotta pivot to kidnap kids. I guess, well, gotta

843
00:56:52,320 --> 00:56:55,199
do something. The space ain't kind
of sell itself. Find some grieving mothers.

844
00:56:57,280 --> 00:57:00,920
Anyway. Garis can also cause earthquakes, and he can grant noble titles.

845
00:57:00,679 --> 00:57:07,039
There's Prince Rod to bury the lead. He'll teach you languages. What

846
00:57:07,239 --> 00:57:12,800
was another dumb one he had retrieving
runaway Retrieving runaway people also causes earthquake,

847
00:57:12,840 --> 00:57:16,599
can rip the earth into two and
give you royalty I guess status. So

848
00:57:16,760 --> 00:57:20,079
yeah, you're like, I don't
have any one that's missing. You might

849
00:57:20,079 --> 00:57:22,719
not be very useful. It's like
I couldn't destroy any city you want.

850
00:57:23,599 --> 00:57:28,400
Oh okay, and then make you
king of something. Oh yeah, cause

851
00:57:28,519 --> 00:57:31,039
started with that. Yeah, you
need to flip your list, buddy.

852
00:57:31,320 --> 00:57:34,960
Oh he's limited, all right.
You can only do it where the tectonic

853
00:57:35,000 --> 00:57:38,079
plates are either way. He's like
de Moine, I can't do it.

854
00:57:38,159 --> 00:57:43,079
What's that The Mystery Man? Do
you remember that movie with Uh? It

855
00:57:43,199 --> 00:57:47,679
was like kel Mitchell. Kel Mitchell
played a superhero that could only turn invisible

856
00:57:47,679 --> 00:57:51,320
if no one was looking at him. Oh yeah, it was great.

857
00:57:52,000 --> 00:57:55,639
Uh. Print He's like Boo from
Super Mario pretty much. Yeah. But

858
00:57:55,679 --> 00:57:59,679
if you look at him, me
just is there you see him? Yeah?

859
00:58:00,559 --> 00:58:02,559
Uh. Prince of Robbie's is the
next one in the prince level.

860
00:58:02,840 --> 00:58:07,079
He answers questions and gives one power
and control over others. So if you

861
00:58:07,119 --> 00:58:10,880
want to do like one thing to
a person, like have one power over

862
00:58:10,920 --> 00:58:15,719
them, he can help you with
that. Okay. He protects from the

863
00:58:15,800 --> 00:58:20,039
persecution of evil spirits and also from
enemies. He will put a stop to

864
00:58:20,079 --> 00:58:22,480
slander and gossip, so he just
cuts that shit out. So if you

865
00:58:22,760 --> 00:58:27,719
get like me too, yeah,
you can hit up a Robbie's yeah,

866
00:58:28,480 --> 00:58:31,519
be like, hey, shut this
story down. This is one of my

867
00:58:31,519 --> 00:58:39,559
favorites of his. He can discern
the present what so he knows what's going

868
00:58:39,599 --> 00:58:44,559
on. Will makes sense if you're
like, hey, what like if you're

869
00:58:44,559 --> 00:58:46,599
like trying to do a business deal
or something like, what are they thinking?

870
00:58:46,840 --> 00:58:50,440
Yeah? I guess so well yeah, he can also foretell the future.

871
00:58:50,519 --> 00:58:53,480
So I burying the lead again.
He is the Patron of horses,

872
00:58:54,119 --> 00:58:58,880
the demon patron, I guess.
And he appears as a hybrid black stallion

873
00:58:58,960 --> 00:59:01,440
person bucking with so he's kind of
like a horseman. I will pull up

874
00:59:01,440 --> 00:59:05,840
a picture of him for you right
now. He's ridiculous looking. All of

875
00:59:05,840 --> 00:59:08,280
these guys are ridiculous and I love
them all. What's his name orobus o

876
00:59:08,679 --> 00:59:13,760
r abe? Did you said there
was an Eligis Elegis? I haven't said

877
00:59:13,880 --> 00:59:16,920
enough Elgius? Okay, Well,
Saint Eligius or Saint Elois is the patron

878
00:59:17,000 --> 00:59:22,840
saint of horses. So I was
just wondering if there was a this is

879
00:59:22,880 --> 00:59:27,719
your boy Orobis? Oh Lord,
that guy's gonna fuck you up. He's

880
00:59:27,719 --> 00:59:32,199
a black stallion man, run up
dog. That thing he kind of looks

881
00:59:32,239 --> 00:59:37,320
like he would just slap fight you, Like he wouldn't like throw fists just

882
00:59:37,480 --> 00:59:42,960
Rick Flair chop after Rick Flair,
definitely make that noise, which would be

883
00:59:42,960 --> 00:59:49,199
horrifying from a demon too. Yeah, yeah, all right. Some demons,

884
00:59:49,280 --> 00:59:52,760
by the way, are hot,
Okay, I would hope. So

885
00:59:52,920 --> 00:59:54,559
it's because they're none of them actually
look very good right now. Uh.

886
00:59:54,880 --> 01:00:00,320
Lore is a mighty great marquis of
Hell who has thirty legions of demons under

887
01:00:00,360 --> 01:00:04,920
his power. He causes great battles
and disputes. He makes gang Green wounds

888
01:00:04,960 --> 01:00:10,679
caused by arrows. So I feel
like that gang Green thing with a bigger

889
01:00:10,719 --> 01:00:15,800
deal back when they invented him.
Yeah for sure. I mean like you

890
01:00:15,840 --> 01:00:19,639
get shot by an arrow, you're
gonna die. Yeah for sure. No,

891
01:00:19,760 --> 01:00:22,280
So he like makes sure like if
you're going into battles, like I

892
01:00:22,360 --> 01:00:23,880
want all my arrows to cause gang
Green. Yeah, he's gonna be like

893
01:00:24,000 --> 01:00:30,760
where it's like now, antibiotics kind
of neutralize that power, right. He

894
01:00:30,000 --> 01:00:37,400
is described as a really gaalleant like
handsome archer, like kind of like a

895
01:00:37,480 --> 01:00:45,039
Robin Hood type guy or ah Jod
Orlando Bloom play in Troy Paris. I

896
01:00:45,159 --> 01:00:50,199
don't played Paris. I don't know
rob Legals, Gang Green Defense in the

897
01:00:50,280 --> 01:00:52,320
nineties pretty formidable. Was it the
nineties? I thought it was like the

898
01:00:52,400 --> 01:00:57,960
seventies, Papa Ryan. I thought
it was when Dick Vermeil coached him Gang

899
01:00:58,039 --> 01:01:04,039
Green Gang Green Defense was under Ryan. Okay, you don't even win shit,

900
01:01:05,519 --> 01:01:07,840
No, buddy, Ryan did not
win anything, but you know,

901
01:01:07,840 --> 01:01:15,199
we're fun. There's President Marbles of
Hell. He's a great President of Hell,

902
01:01:15,280 --> 01:01:19,960
governing thirty six legions of demons.
He answers truly on hidden or secret

903
01:01:20,000 --> 01:01:23,280
things, so like if you want
to know where something is or some secret

904
01:01:23,320 --> 01:01:25,400
knowledge that you don't know yet,
I'll tell you the truth. It's like,

905
01:01:25,440 --> 01:01:30,599
hey, we're their aliens are oswell, And he'd be like yeah,

906
01:01:30,679 --> 01:01:37,960
yeah, hey dude, uh fuck, I'm like totally blanking on the assassin's

907
01:01:37,000 --> 01:01:40,079
name. It did he kill JFK
da Lee Harvey aswell killed JFK? No,

908
01:01:42,280 --> 01:01:44,880
man, I'd be funny. He
was just like, yeah, actually,

909
01:01:45,239 --> 01:01:47,000
it's funny. I shot. One
of the most common things about these

910
01:01:47,079 --> 01:01:52,800
they all talk hoarsely, so like
a lot of smoke. Yeah, yeah,

911
01:01:52,920 --> 01:01:54,400
you know, yeah, totally.
All of this has to be done

912
01:01:54,440 --> 01:01:58,159
in an incredibly dim room by the
way, so like when you see them,

913
01:01:58,199 --> 01:02:01,880
you kind of see him because you
know, like plausible viability exactly.

914
01:02:02,559 --> 01:02:06,119
He caused for who, for everyone, for the demons, for you,

915
01:02:06,320 --> 01:02:08,559
it's just it's just fun in your
house. Yeah, with shapes and salt.

916
01:02:08,800 --> 01:02:13,039
It's really the journey and not of
the destination. He causes and heals

917
01:02:13,039 --> 01:02:15,239
diseases. He gives wisdom and knowledge
in mechanical arts, so I guess he

918
01:02:15,280 --> 01:02:20,199
can help you like rebuild your engine. His legions, all all the mechanics

919
01:02:20,280 --> 01:02:23,239
we were talking about. Mars Marbot's
just says a jiffy loop down and home.

920
01:02:23,320 --> 01:02:28,880
I just knew it. That's President
Marbles. He's really good at oil

921
01:02:28,960 --> 01:02:30,360
changes and it's and it. By
the way, it makes sense that all

922
01:02:30,360 --> 01:02:37,079
the mechanics work for the lowest president. That's the lowest one. Yeah,

923
01:02:37,159 --> 01:02:42,400
he is h He's depicted as a
great lion that, under the conjuror's request

924
01:02:42,519 --> 01:02:45,360
changes shape into a man. So
he'll show up as a lion first and

925
01:02:45,360 --> 01:02:47,960
he'll be like, hey, Marble's
chill out. I get it. Turn

926
01:02:49,000 --> 01:02:51,239
into a man. He's like,
I'm fine, I want to just be

927
01:02:51,280 --> 01:02:53,840
a lyon, but a hot one. Yeah, yeah, you can ask.

928
01:02:53,880 --> 01:02:57,119
I guess. Yeah, I'm not
trying to look at him. I'll

929
01:02:57,119 --> 01:03:01,000
go uh real quick. King Payment
is actually described as a very like flamboyant

930
01:03:01,000 --> 01:03:06,159
man that rides a camel and he
talks very loudly. He's super arrogant and

931
01:03:06,199 --> 01:03:07,719
like he has a bunch of people
just like playing tambourines in front of him.

932
01:03:07,719 --> 01:03:10,119
He kind of looks like a Manson
family person. Okay, I was

933
01:03:10,159 --> 01:03:15,039
gonna, I was almost picturing like
diet issis. Yeah, but count for

934
01:03:15,199 --> 01:03:16,360
first the last one I'm going to
talk about, So we hit all of

935
01:03:16,360 --> 01:03:22,000
our notes here. Count for Fur. That's a powerful great count of Hell,

936
01:03:22,480 --> 01:03:24,519
being the ruler of twenty six legions. He's a liar and less compelled

937
01:03:24,559 --> 01:03:29,719
to enter a magic triangle where he
gives true answers to every question. He

938
01:03:29,760 --> 01:03:31,840
speaks with a rough voice as well. He causes love between a man and

939
01:03:31,840 --> 01:03:37,079
a woman. He can create storms
and teaches of secret divine things, so

940
01:03:37,159 --> 01:03:43,400
like hidden God knowledge, he speaks
on not corporal like man knowledge. But

941
01:03:43,480 --> 01:03:46,800
I like that too. Yeah.
He's depicted as a deer or winged deer,

942
01:03:47,840 --> 01:03:52,199
and to some authors, he changes
from deer into angel when compelled to

943
01:03:52,280 --> 01:03:58,079
enter the magic triangle. Now,
all of this, to say the least

944
01:03:59,000 --> 01:04:02,880
is you want to make a bit
like I mean, if you want to

945
01:04:02,880 --> 01:04:05,840
dive into the stuff, it's pretty
interesting. It is a boring read.

946
01:04:06,000 --> 01:04:09,840
I never thought reading a book of
dem about dem like i'd hand, But

947
01:04:09,880 --> 01:04:14,920
it's here. That's what you really
needn't know though, right, Like if

948
01:04:14,960 --> 01:04:17,400
you were handed a manual a time
or if your hand, if if someone

949
01:04:17,519 --> 01:04:20,840
was like, hey, here's a
time machine. This is a real fucking

950
01:04:20,840 --> 01:04:25,320
time machine. But you have to
read this manual. Yeah, and it's

951
01:04:25,480 --> 01:04:28,719
on the time machine and it's hard. Yeah, it's really hard to make

952
01:04:28,760 --> 01:04:32,199
it work. Like you would be
bored to fucking tears reading the Delorean's manual.

953
01:04:32,239 --> 01:04:35,199
I will be real with you.
You could tell me step by step

954
01:04:35,519 --> 01:04:41,119
how to make a billion dollars.
If it's like longer than three pages,

955
01:04:41,840 --> 01:04:43,880
I'm not gonna read it. Why
are you so horse? Are you a

956
01:04:43,920 --> 01:04:47,920
demon? Perhaps the demon's coming out
within me? So well, I think

957
01:04:48,079 --> 01:04:55,199
all of this really is I'm going
like hyper practical here. Everything's about alignment

958
01:04:55,199 --> 01:04:59,440
of your room directions. You need
to be facing shapes you need to be

959
01:04:59,480 --> 01:05:05,400
looking at, including sigils, which
sigils are just very complex shapes drawn to

960
01:05:05,440 --> 01:05:09,039
represent something. You know, you
can make a sigil out of anything,

961
01:05:09,119 --> 01:05:15,320
really, but it's all I think
mental and transmitt So I think all of

962
01:05:15,360 --> 01:05:20,800
this really is like I don't think
Salomon binded physical hell demons. I think

963
01:05:20,840 --> 01:05:25,719
what he's doing is just hardcore meditation
because this stuff takes a long time,

964
01:05:25,800 --> 01:05:30,719
it takes repetitive movements, it's very
ritualistic. There's certain steps you have to

965
01:05:30,760 --> 01:05:32,840
go instant. There's things you have
to smell, things you have to say.

966
01:05:32,920 --> 01:05:36,239
I think it's all about getting yourself
into the right mind space in order

967
01:05:36,239 --> 01:05:41,800
to unlock these demons. Are just
mental states that allow you to do something

968
01:05:41,840 --> 01:05:45,599
differently. So like think about it
this way. You know, you have

969
01:05:45,840 --> 01:05:50,760
a big presentation right in the morning, say, or like in a week,

970
01:05:51,440 --> 01:05:56,119
and you want to make sure you
are in the right headspace and you

971
01:05:56,159 --> 01:05:59,840
want to make sure you deliver on
it. We don't have like what do

972
01:05:59,840 --> 01:06:04,119
you want to call it self help
training and like corporate management training in seventeen

973
01:06:04,199 --> 01:06:11,320
hundred or sixteen hundred. What you
have is superstition at demon yeah, or

974
01:06:11,440 --> 01:06:15,719
like this thing you can do and
yeah, sure you're committing a dark art

975
01:06:15,840 --> 01:06:17,679
or whatever, but at the same
time, you are spending so much time

976
01:06:17,719 --> 01:06:23,159
focusing intently on the thing you want
that you're tricking yourself into believe, like

977
01:06:23,199 --> 01:06:25,719
operating in a way that you're gonna
get it by doing all this stuff,

978
01:06:25,760 --> 01:06:30,360
Like you're programming yourself through physical shit
something. That's where the common that's come

979
01:06:30,360 --> 01:06:34,199
out and like the last probably fifty
sixty years is called chaos magic. It's

980
01:06:34,239 --> 01:06:38,679
basically taking all of the ship from
the lesser and greater keys of Salomon and

981
01:06:38,719 --> 01:06:42,400
being like, look, you're not
actually summoning a demon. You're just going

982
01:06:42,440 --> 01:06:45,519
to a place in your head.
So what if you just do it that

983
01:06:45,639 --> 01:06:49,119
instead of like all this bullshit dancing
around asking for demons, trying to pierce

984
01:06:49,199 --> 01:06:53,599
the veil, you just sit intently
and think about what you want, and

985
01:06:53,639 --> 01:06:57,440
you make your own little sigil,
and then you do a ritual whatever makes

986
01:06:57,480 --> 01:07:00,800
sense to you. The most modern
thing I've ever heard. Hey man,

987
01:07:01,280 --> 01:07:09,519
she say, you know you new
debut. What Solomon is so unimpressive that

988
01:07:09,920 --> 01:07:14,760
I can't even recall or think of
somebody that his name Solomon that has done

989
01:07:14,760 --> 01:07:23,159
anything notable. Solomon Patton. That's
a athlete, right, No, No,

990
01:07:24,039 --> 01:07:27,559
the only athlete I can think of
as Solomon Hill, who's a pretty

991
01:07:27,559 --> 01:07:30,400
average basketball player. Yeah he's not
that good. Yeah, it wasn't King

992
01:07:30,440 --> 01:07:32,679
Solomon. The when I was like, I'll cut this baby in half.

993
01:07:32,760 --> 01:07:35,280
Yes, that was King Solomon,
who that's like, all right, we'll

994
01:07:35,280 --> 01:07:38,840
figure out who the mom is.
We'll cut it in half and you can

995
01:07:38,840 --> 01:07:42,760
each half half. And the one
lady that was clearly lying was like that

996
01:07:42,880 --> 01:07:47,639
sounds good, which which what The
only thing I get added is that King

997
01:07:47,719 --> 01:07:51,039
Solomon was like, Oh, this
isn't gonna tell me who the real mother

998
01:07:51,199 --> 01:07:57,039
is by her getting upset. It's
going to just confirm to me that the

999
01:07:57,159 --> 01:08:00,599
woman trying to steal her baby is
in fact and say yeah, yeah,

1000
01:08:00,639 --> 01:08:04,119
pretty much, because like no right
person would be like, yes, that

1001
01:08:04,199 --> 01:08:10,039
makes sense. You should have followed
through. Give them sucked up. I

1002
01:08:10,079 --> 01:08:13,599
made my ruling. That's a classic, like Old Testament way of doing.

1003
01:08:13,639 --> 01:08:15,359
It's like, all right, stab
your son, yeah, kill him,

1004
01:08:15,479 --> 01:08:18,640
man. They just want you to
stab your kids. They want they really

1005
01:08:18,840 --> 01:08:23,279
they want you to get as close
as possible. But what'd you guys learned

1006
01:08:23,319 --> 01:08:30,520
today? I learned that, you
know, the first temple of Solomon was

1007
01:08:30,520 --> 01:08:33,039
built by demons or the first Jewish
Temple was built by demons. Not choose,

1008
01:08:33,199 --> 01:08:38,119
Yeah, not choose if you believe
in non canonical texts like the Book

1009
01:08:38,119 --> 01:08:44,039
of Enoch, I prefer my own
fan fiction to what really happen. But

1010
01:08:44,079 --> 01:08:45,520
also, what's the difference between a
Jew and a demon? You know?

1011
01:08:46,159 --> 01:08:51,199
Wow? I think that's kind of
what you're alluding to, right, No,

1012
01:08:51,279 --> 01:08:55,079
that's what you just set out,
wowed. No, I think that's

1013
01:08:55,079 --> 01:08:58,439
just what the text means. Everything
you just read. It's not actual demon,

1014
01:08:58,439 --> 01:09:00,800
it's just Jewish people. You're the
guy Rob was talking about earlier,

1015
01:09:01,800 --> 01:09:06,399
the anti Semiti that just needed the
push. Dan'smen I and that shotgun in

1016
01:09:06,399 --> 01:09:12,159
the in the room all all episode, the salt one, the real one.

1017
01:09:12,520 --> 01:09:16,399
Damn it? What'd you learned?
Dan? I learned that I can

1018
01:09:16,399 --> 01:09:24,439
take this night based on names Fercus, Fercus. I'm not getting mrked by

1019
01:09:24,439 --> 01:09:29,079
a dude named Fergus that is a
nineties nerd character and names like ferguson Yeah,

1020
01:09:30,159 --> 01:09:32,800
I'm shoving this dude in the locker
Fercus. It's like, oh,

1021
01:09:32,920 --> 01:09:39,720
yeah, who's up? Who's Hitler? Uh Man? I don't know,

1022
01:09:40,079 --> 01:09:45,760
uh Solomon, I guess we just
named like nine demons. Yeah, yeah,

1023
01:09:45,960 --> 01:09:50,119
but none of them are real,
you know, head honchos. Maybe

1024
01:09:50,239 --> 01:09:56,039
Lucifer bow Man. Lucifer could be
Hitler, you know who it's Lucifer or

1025
01:09:56,079 --> 01:09:58,640
Solomon. I actually I guess Lucifer
because he made all of you is.

1026
01:09:58,720 --> 01:10:01,279
It's really like, you know,
was was Hitler the worst guy in the

1027
01:10:01,359 --> 01:10:05,800
Nazis? No, they were people
under him Himler was arguably worse. Yeah,

1028
01:10:05,880 --> 01:10:10,319
but who enabled who enabled them,
who let them, who let them

1029
01:10:10,319 --> 01:10:14,159
loose on the world? Yeah,
yeah, totally definitely that. Well,

1030
01:10:14,800 --> 01:10:16,159
hey, guys, if you want
to summon some demons, check out the

1031
01:10:16,199 --> 01:10:20,359
Lesser Key of Solomon. Waste your
time for nine hours and find the right

1032
01:10:20,479 --> 01:10:24,479
day where the sun and the moon
and all that stuff sligne. Let us

1033
01:10:24,520 --> 01:10:28,079
know how it goes. Do it, especially if you need a boyfriend.

1034
01:10:28,720 --> 01:10:31,000
Yeah, I would definitely recommend it
for boyfriends. Look up the right one.

1035
01:10:31,079 --> 01:10:34,439
Make sure it's the right one.
Have a good offering too. Don't

1036
01:10:34,439 --> 01:10:38,239
be coming you got If you come
for a demon, you come correct.

1037
01:10:38,520 --> 01:10:41,760
Or I would say, if you
just need sex, get fucked by that

1038
01:10:42,159 --> 01:10:45,880
guy who was like one third human
two thirds tors ah. Yes, it

1039
01:10:46,000 --> 01:10:49,479
was like a minotaur, but only
the torso was human. But only one

1040
01:10:49,560 --> 01:10:55,760
third of him. His penis is
human. No penis, it's actually the

1041
01:10:55,760 --> 01:11:00,520
first parts with a human cock.
It's very unimpressive. That's the worst thing

1042
01:11:00,560 --> 01:11:04,800
I've ever pictured. So it's a
I think you should leave. It is

1043
01:11:04,960 --> 01:11:09,479
like it's it's a horse. There's
a bit about a horse farm where all

1044
01:11:09,479 --> 01:11:13,479
the horses have small dogs. So
the guys don't feel asculated by the show.

1045
01:11:13,600 --> 01:11:16,520
But it's very funny. I always
see the memes. Yeah, well

1046
01:11:17,199 --> 01:11:19,520
that's it for today. Again.
Check us out, leave a review,

1047
01:11:19,680 --> 01:11:24,119
go to YouTube, subscribe to us
there. Check out our patreon, Patreon,

1048
01:11:24,159 --> 01:11:27,680
dot com, slash software history,
leave a review, Apple and iTunes

1049
01:11:28,359 --> 01:11:30,920
Spotify five stars, Apple, Just
leave a review. Please, if you

1050
01:11:30,920 --> 01:11:38,439
can text, write something out,
make it funny and actually, let's let's

1051
01:11:38,560 --> 01:11:42,159
read some reviews. Let's do it. Let's do it. Yea review time.

1052
01:11:42,279 --> 01:11:45,640
Let's see how many reviews we've gotten
since that call to action? How

1053
01:11:45,640 --> 01:11:50,600
many you got the CTA most weeks? All right? Last one was titled

1054
01:11:50,680 --> 01:11:56,760
deeply educational by truly hard to say. I consider myself a very high brow

1055
01:11:56,880 --> 01:12:00,680
man, and this by far the
most high brow media I consume. Five

1056
01:12:00,720 --> 01:12:05,880
stars. That is sad, that's
that's you should really somebody check on you.

1057
01:12:06,159 --> 01:12:09,640
Yeah, up, up your game, bro, you should be the

1058
01:12:09,640 --> 01:12:14,960
lowest right making history fun. Love
this podcast. I almost get a full

1059
01:12:15,000 --> 01:12:17,880
heart on every time I get into
a notification for a new episode? Is

1060
01:12:17,880 --> 01:12:21,520
that gay or can it? Just
say no homo and they'll be fine.

1061
01:12:23,600 --> 01:12:26,239
It doesn't matter if it is or
it isn't, as long as you're enjoying

1062
01:12:26,239 --> 01:12:29,479
yourself, I know. Yeah,
that's all that matters. Yeah. And

1063
01:12:29,520 --> 01:12:32,239
by the way, in case you're
wondering, legally, you cannot get out

1064
01:12:32,239 --> 01:12:35,199
of a murder charge if you say
no homo before you kill someone. It

1065
01:12:35,199 --> 01:12:39,880
doesn't work. No, no,
it doesn't work in any aspect about you

1066
01:12:39,920 --> 01:12:46,680
will still be accused of being gay
anyway. Yeah. An Aphrodisiac by Caleb

1067
01:12:46,760 --> 01:12:50,760
Hutt. Long time listener here one
time while I was having sex with my

1068
01:12:50,840 --> 01:12:55,520
girlfriend. She also listens to the
show. The playlist that put on was

1069
01:12:55,560 --> 01:13:00,319
too short to finish the deed and
Spotify autoplated an episode of this show.

1070
01:13:00,880 --> 01:13:04,239
We let the episode play. Needless
to say, we both finished. Thanks

1071
01:13:04,319 --> 01:13:09,399
Dan Robin Jake Opie finished the episode
as well. We like when you listen

1072
01:13:09,399 --> 01:13:13,479
to the end. Well, look
after you fuck You're gonna like just lay

1073
01:13:13,479 --> 01:13:16,520
there for a little bit and then
they're clean up, So like you're gonna

1074
01:13:16,640 --> 01:13:21,960
I don't know how long they were
fucking or whatever, but like you're gonna

1075
01:13:23,119 --> 01:13:25,920
you get I feel like you get
like an extra ten to fifteen minutes of

1076
01:13:26,039 --> 01:13:28,520
just like chill time. Yeah,
totally. I let us know if it

1077
01:13:28,560 --> 01:13:30,960
was the facts or the banter that
got you there. That's the most important

1078
01:13:30,960 --> 01:13:35,239
thing. Whose voice really? Yeah? Who's voice? His voice? Did

1079
01:13:35,279 --> 01:13:41,319
you finish on? Not the Lady
the Man? Yeah, obviously. Anyway,

1080
01:13:41,760 --> 01:13:43,960
that's it for our show. Thanks
so much for listening. For Rob

1081
01:13:44,000 --> 01:13:46,600
Fox and Dan Rochester. I'm Jake
Goldman. You just goss all served
