WEBVTT

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Hello there, everyone, and welcome
back to the disc Connected. You are

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about to see me do an interview
with the wonderful Cat Ollinger. If you've

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been watching this channel for quite some
time, you have probably heard me say

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her name a countless infinite number of
times. Cat has been a part of

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many, many wonderful boutique releases throughout
the years from companies like Vinegar Syndrome,

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Severn Films, Aero Video, and
many more. On top of that,

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she's been announced as being a part
of the boutique label that is about to

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be launched officially in the next thirty
days or so from Franz Simioni who used

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to be at Aero Video. That
company will be called Radiance Films, and

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it does get mentioned in this interview. If you have anybody like this that

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you would like me to interview,
please let me know in the comments below,

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or if you are somebody that is
an expert in any of these fields

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and you would like to be involved, please send me an email. My

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email is in that description as well. On top of that, if you

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would like to have a hand in
some of these interviews by contributing questions,

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please consider joining the Patreon and the
description below. If by the end of

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this interview you enjoyed it, please
click that like button, and if you

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haven't, please subscribe. I've got
more interviews like this coming out all the

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time, and I'm looking to make
this community stronger than ever before, so

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I would love to have you be
a part of it. Without further ado,

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after the intro, here is myself
and kat Elancher, Kat, how

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are you tonight? Hello? Thank
you for having me. Thank you.

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I had the wonderful honor of previewing
the ridiculously great documentary that you just finished

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and premiered at FrightFest Orchestrator of Stores. You've done a lot behind that.

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What were all of your roles?
Oh my god, I was like the

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writer, producer, co director,
just thing on it. Basically, I've

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worked with Deema, my sort of
collaborative partner for years, and we've made

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quite a few films together, but
this was my first co director credit on

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that. Yeah. I'm glad you
liked it, though, because I didn't

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know this is I genuinely documentaries are
one of my favorite things because I really

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like diving into a niche that either
I tangentially sort of understand or I know

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nothing about and now I just want
to be absorbed and everything about it.

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And usually if it's successful, I
just want to immerse myself in it.

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And after watching this, it was
just feed everything that he has ever completed

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directly that is so good. That
was why we did it. One of

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the reasons why his his work is
a been like widely out there to everybody

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in a way that is like pervasive. Do you have any sense on why

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that would be? Perhaps, well, I don't know. I mean,

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we tried to cover some of it
in the film and sort of highlight that

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before the nineties, it was really
impossible to see this stuff. I mean,

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some people managed to see it.
I know Pete Tooms did some screenings

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in the late eighties, and you
know, obviously there were small French the

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actrical releases of some of his films, but by and large it was just

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ignored. And I guess because it
wasn't that marketable. It wasn't like straight

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on horror. Some of his porn
stuff came out as pawn but again it's

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like this weird mix, and so
it really was then. And Quino actually

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did blu rays of his stuff probably
about ten years ago, but even those

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have been kind of ignored, like
nobody was. I remember when they bought

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them out, they did the Jess
Branco stuff and they did the people because

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stuff all through Redemption, like Heino
Redemption. Obviously it's Nigel Wingrove again.

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And we had some releases here in
the UK. I'm trying to think what

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label it was. One of the
small ones like screen band maybe, but

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again, like I don't know,
it's just totally got overlooked. It's odd

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because obviously, like you go over
in the documentary, it's kind of a

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weird mix of genres for some people, so I think that that may be

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a part of it. But yeah, in the US, the maybe the

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Redemption branding was just different for people. But I know I was excited to

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see Nigel in the documentary and speaking. Yeah he was great. Yeah,

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he was great. And you know, the documentary video a lot of it

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to him because it started off as
as a much smaller product. And then

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I started talking to him about Rollin
and we had loads of phone conversations and

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he told me all this wonderful stuff
about him and it was like, we

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have to get this in the film
and put me in touch with Rolands and

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surgery who's not in the film,
but was also very helpful behind them scenes,

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and he put us in touch with
a very unique Roland's long term friend

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and she was great and you know
the stories that she had, So it

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kind of went from there, and
Nigel was just wonderful. He just wanted

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to the film to be made because
obviously he's champion Rolland for decades, and

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there was a big risk put in
those films out when he did, because

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they were virtually unheard of. And
I know he told me Pete Teams had

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a lot to do with that also, But you know, Pete was great

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behind the scenes but didn't want to
come on camera and his teacher, I

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love Pete. He was like,
I don't want to go on camera,

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but he was great behind the scenes. So we had so much support,

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Like even though it was like co
director, it really was like a kind

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of team effort of everybody working on
it. Levet Rollin, so I had

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a great energy about it. The
energy was palpable to a point where you

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know, it's chronological documentary for the
most part, and the winding thread through

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the whole thing is this life that
he's lived that's been super interesting and as

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you got his friend that you just
mentioned. And I don't want to spoil

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it because I really want people to
go see this, but the it was

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this emotional climax and near the end
of it that I was just gutted right

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alongside it, just to feel that, you know, the memories of this

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person and the pervasive imagery that he's
given to the world, you can just

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feel how much it's affected these people. Yeah, not a bad word,

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and nobody had a bad wood to
say about him, nobody, you know,

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they all loved him. And I
was very clear from the stock becas

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obviously I've championed, championed Rollin a
lot in my own writing career, but

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I really wanted to ever have very
super specific experts like we have Madeline to

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talk about things like anti clerical porn
and the fantasy Ekla Paris and and decadence

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stuff because she's just so good on
that, but also a massive fan of

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Rollin and Virginie as well, who
is also like and a total expert on

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the French fantastic and everybody else had
to be somebody who either knew Rollin or

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met Rollan. You know, we
didn't. We didn't want to just do

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like a kind of analysis of his
films. We wanted people that knew him

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in there that he could sort of
tell us personal things about him, because

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he's a difficult man to know.
We spent ments translating his autobiography from French,

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photographing every page and running them through
Google Translate. And he says very

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little about his family. It's all
about his films. Even his mothery we

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adored. There's like a little bit
about his mother, but again it's all

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about the films. And so getting
anything about him was so difficult because all

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he ever talked about was my film, my life in films. But yeah,

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he was married, he had children, his brother worked with him in

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films. The surge was helped him
with some of his films, but he

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kind of I don't know, he
was just like that. He just didn't

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like to talk about himself. It
was all to do with the film.

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So it was important that we had
people that had actually known him, yeah,

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to tell us something about that.
We did get some archive interviews with

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him, but again they were just
very straightforward talking and thought, this isn't

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really telling as much. I was
excited to see all of the pictures that

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were shown in the background. As
you know, there was a voiceover.

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Frequently with documentaries like this, it's
more of a retrospective with talking heads and

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this personal aspect that genuinely came across. And I checked to make sure that

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reviews were out there from Fight Fast
about this and all that before I posted

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mine online. But it was nice
to be able to post this review and

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immediately, not even kidding, within
about three minutes, had already somebody messaging

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me, where can I watch this
right now? That's good? That is

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good. There are people dying to
see this. I doubt that there will

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be anything but triumphant praise because this
is a remarkable, remarkable film. We

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had hell getting the photos as well, because that was a whole other thing,

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but with his family were really helpful. Kayla Janice was incredible and she

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was one of our assistant producers and
she was able to get a lot of

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stuff that she had in an archive. But even just getting photos like you

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can't just look online and find of
course, oh, so you know,

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we had people digging them up from
here, there and everywhere. We did

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have some people say, oh,
it's kind of conventional, but it was

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the only way we could do it
because, like Rollin, we had a

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tiny budget. Yeah, it's the
irony that people are kind of like,

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wow, it's kind of conventional,
and it's like wow, you know,

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if I'd been given a bag of
many, I would have had women dancing

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around and right, French poetry.
But also we didn't really want to detract

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from rolland so I think Roland's work
speaks for itself, right. And yeah,

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with the conventional aspect, it's not
like there's many of these documentaries about

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Rolan out there. So yeah,
there is a French one. Actually there's

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a French one with a lot of
interviews with him in it, and that's

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kind of good, but again it's
just very it's more like an extended interview,

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right. So we looked at that
and thought, well, no,

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we want to do something a little
bit different. We want to also bring

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context in and stuff, and so
it is a little bit different to that

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one. But in English language nothing
there's like been nothing exactly. So a

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conventional aspect kind of makes sense because
for a lot of people, this will

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be the intro to Roland, and
this will be the inspiration to dive in

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headfirst and forgive the pun, but
you know, find the fascination in his

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so fascinations was one of my working
titles, and everyone was like, you

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get to just stop. It was
something like the nude Vampire and other fascinations

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and that's actually pretty yeah. Come
up with orchestrated storms, which is a

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thing that he said, so yeah, that was a bit more abstract where

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his mine was like right right,
hitting the head on the or hitting the

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nail on the head. I get
that this played very well. I watched

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this last night with my mom and
my wife, and both of them had

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never seen any of his films,
So for me with the background and for

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them without the background, it worked
gangbusters for everybody. And do they want

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to watch them now? They interesting? Immediately my wife was literally like,

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I like vampire films. How can
you even show me any of these?

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You haven't seen too many things.
I'm trying to show you everything. It

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was a great time though, Like
I said, that conventional aspect makes sense

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because this will be the intro for
most people. So for me, I've

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got my personal things that I tell
people if they're looking for him what to

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watch first? What do you usually
throw out there as after this documentary?

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What would you say usually I'd say
fascination in The Living Dead Girl, which

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are is slightly later of films.
I think Grapes of Death is a kind

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of fan favorite as well. It's
like a very weird take on a zombie

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film. But The Living Dead Girls
especially plays out more like a conventional horror,

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even though it isn't really conventional horror, but it was the early eighties

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he was having to try and be
more conventional. It's also a masterpiece,

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and it's also one hundred percent rollin, but I think that's probably the best

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way in, and then work your
way back to things like Rape of the

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Vampire, which is one of his
most difficult films. That's about online exactly

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the way I usually say. And
for those in the US, the Redemption

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Films line that put them out.
They again, I think they're about a

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decade old now, but yeah,
they're probably about a decade, don't They

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were one of the reasons I actually
bought a multi region player them and The

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Pete Walkers because we didn't have them
that we only had the vhs then.

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Surprisingly, though, even though I
think they're his stuff, started around twenty

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twelve with that line, and they
look fantastic. They do they're really nice

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transwer Yeah, they are really nice
transwers. That was one of the first

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sort of blu rays that I got, and I thought, oh, this

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actually looks really good. I was
surprised, especially with the name that hasn't

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been pervasive with a lot of people
like REGI. Yeah, it's strange.

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They never seem to be big sells
for for Kino, and they're they're part

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of every sale and I don't get
it. I think that they should be

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doing very well. They should be
buying them all. And they're quite cheap

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as well. There's no exc they're
kind of bare bones, but you know,

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they're good for the films. I
can't the math little. Yeah,

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some of the have little interviews with
rollin on I think. I don't know

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if they all do, but yeah, especially some of the later ones,

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because a lot of the earlier ones
there was not a lot saved. I

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mean for a person that was born
in nineteen thirty eight, again, getting

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those photos must have been extremely difficult. Yeah, and some of them had

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to be restored. I mean,
it was a whole thing. But we

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really wanted to show that side of
him, right, which was amazing,

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and so we're indebted to everyone who
was just so generous and you know us

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pleading give us more, please,
so many photos for like nearly two hour

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film. I'm telling you well,
especially the style that you went, the

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stuff in the background with some of
that voiceover, it was the perfect backdrop

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to see the contextual side of his
life because it's not an easy story to

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tell with everything that he went through. Yeah, we decided to go with

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bits from his autobiography which are a
bit more personal, which he never actually

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said out loud in interviews, which
is interesting. So we thought, well,

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we'll get an actor to say this, and getting the right actor was

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was you know, we just had
to find someone who was right for that,

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and we had Avianna to do the
other narration and she actually Avianna Snow

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she actually looks like a Roland girl, though you don't see her in the

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film, but she went to fright
Fest and was having photos she's an actress,

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obviously saving photos taken outside the premiere. And then when there's a guy

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I think doing a double take.
It's almost as if one of the girls

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from the field wanted up. And
she's got a sort of floaty dress on

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which she's amazing did you get to
attend the premiere as well. Unfortunately,

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no, because my son's college induction. Yeah, the mundane world of being

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a parent, unfortunately, But it
was We had Bridget le Hay there and

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Virginally did a wonderful Q and A. So hopefully going to get some footage

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from that because it was recorded,
and yeah, it was. It was

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one of them things. Nice to
see Brigitte getting a lot of attention the

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last year and a half or so
with big, fancy releases of some of

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her films. Yes, it's about
time. She's wonderful and she was so

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great as well. It took us
a while to track her down. It

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was just before she kind of resurfaced
for the book, and it took us

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a while to track her down,
and we had to go through one of

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our producers, Jonathan'surin. He's also
our DP for a lot of the interviews.

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He's he's based in the UK,
but he's French, so he was

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going through French journalists to fight because
none of us speak French and she doesn't

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speak very good English. So that
we finally chatted her down, I was

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like, we need to do this
with Brigitte if we can, and She

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was great. She was absolutely wonderful. She was like, yeah, any

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excuse to talk about John. She
loved him so much they all did.

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She looked genuinely beaming happy the entire
time. So yes, she looks incredible

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as well. It's like she's Asia
exactly. How was the reception that you've

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heard from the premiere? It did
really well. I think it also premiered

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at Fantasia, and so it did
really well there because obviously Fantasia and Mitch

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Davis and Kayla Deanie, you know, they were bringing Rollan over sort of

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decades ago, and Kayla's actually in
the film talking about that how she accidentally

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invited him to a film festival,
which is great, and and Mitch has

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always been a massive support of Rollane
as well, so they actually gave him

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a lifetime Achievement world there in twenty
eleven. So it was lovely to have

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it like have its first premiere at
Fantasia because it kind of felt like Rolande's

236
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spiritual home, but the London one
because right fast, you do have like

237
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quite a lot of old guard that
go to that. He met Rollane in

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the nineties at what they call the
euro and they brought him over in the

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mid nineties with Brigitte, I think, and so a lot of those people

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who'd met Bridgite then went to see
the film, which was nice and got

241
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to meet her again. Awesome.
So there's like a special love in London

242
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and the London Films theme for Rollin. That's great, so good to hear,

243
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and that's the entire time. It
felt sort of like a return to

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home, kind of like very warm
belly, like I feel like I'm growing

245
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up again feeling while watching and it
was just nice, absolutely great speaking of

246
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euro so that there is so much
else that you've done other than Roland obviously,

247
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and I try to get prepared.
So I've got a couple of things

248
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here. First off, so many
people don't even know that you did Yeah,

249
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my Sergio Martino. But that was
for Arrow back. Now, how

250
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did that come about originally? Because
that was Yeah, Arrow just started this

251
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book line, which I think they
might have abandoned now. They did like

252
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a few of them. Tom Mes
did a really good one on Maker Cargi,

253
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they had the Hitcher, there was
a few, and so they just

254
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put out a call out to contributors. You know, if you have a

255
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book pitch, send us a pitch, so I did and send it to

256
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Francesco Simeoni, who was also my
producer on the Rollland thing so and now

257
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my boss at Radiance Films. So
I do o frown a lot, and

258
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he liked the pitch. I'd always
wanted to do either Sudio or Lensy.

259
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It's a very more book project,
though the idea was they fit next to

260
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a blue ray. So it ended
up quite a challenge because when I started

261
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writing it and then decided I also
want to cover his comedies because I love

262
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them. Then also I had the
hell, am I going to fit since

263
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exactly spect they've given me? But
it was fun, It was really fun.

264
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I'd like to expand me something expanded
at some point though, that is

265
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the perfect way. I was literally
about to say it's a great read.

266
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I just same with the documentary.
I just wanted more. Immediately. You

267
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could tell it's somebody that had that
passion behind it, and they were just

268
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itching to say more. Yeah,
I just yeah. It was It was

269
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kind of limited, but I wanted
to show and I love his shallow films,

270
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but I wanted to show he wasn't
just Jallo and a third of the

271
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films he made with comedies, and
he had this really long career and did

272
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TV and you know, and since
then I've had lots and lots of chances

273
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to talk about him as well,
So that that is cool speaking of And

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you're also on this disc for So
Sweet, So Perversal, I one of

275
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my favorite projects I've ever done,
because all my love for LENDSI that was

276
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the book I didn't write in that
track you can tell. And I don't

277
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think this was the first one,
but it's one of the first ones that

278
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I really went, you know what. I listened to a lot of my

279
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extras, but Cat is special and
that commentary is what kind of cemented it

280
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for me. And I do I
know this doesn't matter a whole lot,

281
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but I do a live show every
Thursday where I talk about the boutique announcements

282
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that are coming out and when I
go over special features. You are one

283
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of very few people that when I
see the name, I tell everybody that

284
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even if the film is trash,
this is worth buying just for this person.

285
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That is going to be explained.
Yeah, I did cover some trash,

286
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but it's always trash that I love. And yeah, some people take

287
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offense at that they think I should
be more critical with So I'm not going

288
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to waste my time doing something that
I don't like, you know, I'm

289
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there to, you know, work
on things that I love really, but

290
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the getting to do the Lenzi sat
was just brilliant. I remember when David

291
00:22:00.599 --> 00:22:04.039
Gregory emailed me to say they were
doing a LENSI Carol, because I was

292
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like, you are you are?
Can I swear? I was like all

293
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right, yeah, he'll fucking jokeing. I was just like, oh my

294
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god. But David Gregory tends to
do that a lot with stuff, you

295
00:22:18.039 --> 00:22:19.920
know, because sovereign perhaps some insane
stuff. You'll be like, oh,

296
00:22:21.000 --> 00:22:25.359
yeah, we're doing this like Massive
Christopher in Europe Box It's just like what

297
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we Oh my god, that Milligan
set. I don't buy that many disks

298
00:22:32.839 --> 00:22:37.119
because I can never afford them,
but that's one of the only things I've

299
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ever pre ordered. And I was
sweating through it, suddenly thinking why am

300
00:22:41.119 --> 00:22:47.279
I panicking that everyone's suddenly gonna buy
Andy Milligan, Like no one gives a

301
00:22:47.279 --> 00:22:49.640
ship about Andy Milligan. And then
and then it did. It sold out,

302
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so I was like, I was
like triumphant. I thought I get

303
00:22:52.759 --> 00:22:59.759
it. Now I get this whole
like if people keep up at midnight.

304
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It's very very true. I speaking
of the trash films that we all tend

305
00:23:03.880 --> 00:23:07.880
to love. When we're you know, discussing stuff like this. One of

306
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the things I tend to say on
this channel a lot is that every single

307
00:23:11.160 --> 00:23:15.599
film has been somebody's favorite film.
So, with all the work that you've

308
00:23:15.599 --> 00:23:19.200
done, is there any film that
you find especially hard to recommend to people

309
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even though you truly love it?
No? No, I mean all the

310
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work that I've done, I take
on largely to champion it. Yeah,

311
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and I think, you know,
say I did something that I didn't think

312
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was that amazing. I can't think
of anything, but no, it's normally

313
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I do have ADHD, so I
have to be like hyper focused and interested

314
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on something to engage with it.
But you're right, it's like every film

315
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as a fan, And so I
would never go on a commentary and be

316
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remotely critical exactly, you know,
because I'm not doing a commentary for some

317
00:23:56.200 --> 00:24:00.119
reviewer who've got a check disc.
I'm doing it for the that spent twenty

318
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dollars thirty dollars on the disc,
and the last thing they want is somebody

319
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pointing out flaws, you know,
like that is part of film criticism,

320
00:24:10.599 --> 00:24:15.200
but I don't think it should be
part of extras. You know, it's

321
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just an insult. So no,
I'd recommend everything I've ever worked on one

322
00:24:19.680 --> 00:24:23.119
hundred percent, like you have to
get it all because it's all amazing.

323
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And a lot of the stuff that
I've done, it's been stuff that just

324
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wasn't available before, or on very
bad quality copies and things like that,

325
00:24:34.200 --> 00:24:40.599
or just these terrible, awful ratio
DVDs, or you could only see it

326
00:24:40.680 --> 00:24:44.960
on bootlegs. So I do.
I have done some more mainstream stuff,

327
00:24:45.000 --> 00:24:48.599
but generally it tends to be that
That's what really excites me, the fact

328
00:24:48.599 --> 00:24:52.200
that somebody's actually bothered to think,
you know, I'm going to release this

329
00:24:52.599 --> 00:24:57.119
film, you know that maybe twenty
five people care about, and then sitting

330
00:24:57.240 --> 00:25:03.279
people discover it that it is the
best part. Because I think one of

331
00:25:03.319 --> 00:25:07.200
them was American Richual, the Sergio
Martino film, which I bloody love,

332
00:25:07.000 --> 00:25:10.519
and when Jesse told me they were
doing it, I was like, you

333
00:25:10.680 --> 00:25:14.799
just you can't be serious. This
is like the only way I could see

334
00:25:14.799 --> 00:25:18.440
that before because I missed it in
the eighties, was there was a bootleg

335
00:25:18.480 --> 00:25:22.319
that went around and it had and
it was even on Amazon Prime. At

336
00:25:22.359 --> 00:25:26.039
one point. I saw it on
Prime and I was like, oh my

337
00:25:26.119 --> 00:25:27.519
god, they've restored it. And
I put it on. It was the

338
00:25:27.559 --> 00:25:33.880
same and it had like the tracking
thing come a pathway through the I was

339
00:25:33.960 --> 00:25:37.720
like, why is this pe put
on Amazon? This is bizarre? And

340
00:25:38.559 --> 00:25:41.720
I loved that film, so when
he said they were doing it, I

341
00:25:41.759 --> 00:25:47.079
was like, Oh my god,
this is so good. And then it

342
00:25:47.119 --> 00:25:52.319
came out and I'm just seeing how
everybody loved that film too. That was

343
00:25:52.400 --> 00:25:56.319
just the best thing ever. I
was like, where is this Bee?

344
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I feel like lately you you are
genuinely hitting a lot of those titles that

345
00:26:02.359 --> 00:26:06.079
haven't been out for a long time. One of the most recent ones is

346
00:26:06.119 --> 00:26:11.480
this horror disc from Oh my God. Yeah, so good. I love

347
00:26:11.599 --> 00:26:14.759
seeing some of these films come out, and again, just seeing your name,

348
00:26:15.000 --> 00:26:19.039
I'm telling you everybody by this now
you absolutely have to You're branching out

349
00:26:19.039 --> 00:26:23.519
to all these new and different boutiques. How are you feeling about the state

350
00:26:23.599 --> 00:26:27.279
of the Union for boutique physical media
ry. I think it's the best it's

351
00:26:27.319 --> 00:26:32.519
ever been. I mean, this
is my full time job basically, and

352
00:26:32.559 --> 00:26:34.119
it's just me and my kids.
You know, it's just you know,

353
00:26:34.200 --> 00:26:40.920
but I managed to support myself that
way full time because I'm you know,

354
00:26:41.000 --> 00:26:44.680
my kids at home. He's been
homeschooled, so you know, that's given

355
00:26:44.720 --> 00:26:48.519
me the chance to also be at
home with my kids. And you know,

356
00:26:48.960 --> 00:26:52.799
the way it is at the moment, I just think we're really in

357
00:26:52.880 --> 00:27:00.920
some sort of renaissance period. For
it's almost like when I don't know VHS

358
00:27:00.960 --> 00:27:03.599
first came out and suddenly you could
just get things and take them home.

359
00:27:04.279 --> 00:27:10.359
It's that same sort of excitement because
there's all sorts of like bizarre check films

360
00:27:10.359 --> 00:27:14.599
that have just been available on fans, of bootlegs and all, like,

361
00:27:14.720 --> 00:27:18.440
I think companies are really sort of
going out of there. You know.

362
00:27:18.559 --> 00:27:22.200
It was great when Blu Ray first
came along and we just had all the

363
00:27:22.319 --> 00:27:23.680
like classics and that was good.
It was like, oh, this is

364
00:27:23.720 --> 00:27:27.160
exciting, it looks good. But
as it's gone along, it's got more

365
00:27:27.160 --> 00:27:33.680
and more esoteric, and you see
companies taking a lot more risks and obviously

366
00:27:33.759 --> 00:27:36.920
saving are one of the biggest of
those because some of the you know,

367
00:27:37.079 --> 00:27:45.799
quin que box sets and mostly it's
done pretty decent for them, so congress

368
00:27:45.839 --> 00:27:48.759
to them. Yeah, and I
think I think we're at a time now

369
00:27:48.759 --> 00:27:52.079
where film fans are more open to
wanting to discover. And that goes back

370
00:27:52.079 --> 00:27:57.240
to Rollin you said why not before. I think before people tended to be

371
00:27:57.599 --> 00:28:03.119
slightly more narrow mine, whereas you
find now, especially within the whole collective

372
00:28:03.200 --> 00:28:07.400
community, people are more open to
just buying other staff and oh, I

373
00:28:07.400 --> 00:28:11.079
don't know this direct or, great, I can do like a whole retrospective

374
00:28:11.119 --> 00:28:15.680
on him. So you're seeing a
lot more a lot more of that,

375
00:28:15.799 --> 00:28:18.519
probably within the last five or six
years. So it's like really taking I

376
00:28:18.599 --> 00:28:22.079
keep hearing people go, oh,
the bottom's about to fall out, but

377
00:28:22.359 --> 00:28:26.359
it doesn't look like that to me. Put it that way at all.

378
00:28:26.519 --> 00:28:30.400
I mean, there's still literally thousands
of films that can be released. I

379
00:28:30.640 --> 00:28:33.599
guess at this point many one of
the main questions is elements. Do we

380
00:28:33.680 --> 00:28:37.160
have proper film to be able to
scale? Yeah, that's always an issue.

381
00:28:37.200 --> 00:28:41.960
That is always an issue. And
you know, there's certain projects I've

382
00:28:41.000 --> 00:28:45.440
worked on behind the scenes that have
fallen through because of elements and things like

383
00:28:45.480 --> 00:28:48.160
that, and that's always getting but
you can always you know, LaaS when

384
00:28:48.200 --> 00:28:53.119
they found Symptoms that I never thought
anyone would find that. It showed on

385
00:28:53.160 --> 00:28:57.480
British TV here in the early eighties, and again somebody managed to record that

386
00:28:57.519 --> 00:29:03.480
and then transfer it to like a
you know, I don't know, some

387
00:29:03.519 --> 00:29:07.160
sort of m K four file on
it, and then it was on YouTube.

388
00:29:07.400 --> 00:29:11.119
Someone even tried to killor correct it
on YouTube at one point. But

389
00:29:11.200 --> 00:29:15.039
the but, the but this is
like just this a great thing. But

390
00:29:15.559 --> 00:29:18.599
the story was the elements are gone, We're never going to see this.

391
00:29:18.680 --> 00:29:23.079
And then all of a sudden BFI
come out with hey, we've restored Symptoms,

392
00:29:23.079 --> 00:29:27.640
and then all the other LRAs films
they started finding them, and it's

393
00:29:27.720 --> 00:29:34.359
like this is so never say never. Somebody somewhere might have a serviceable copy

394
00:29:36.200 --> 00:29:40.519
somewhere in some vault or something that
will turn up. So you know,

395
00:29:40.720 --> 00:29:44.400
I know, Ali Carter is one
of my most wanted and they're always saying

396
00:29:44.440 --> 00:29:48.240
they can't find the elements for that. I just booked a Jared from Mondo

397
00:29:48.319 --> 00:29:51.200
Macabreau earlier this year, and that
was one of the biggest things that we

398
00:29:51.200 --> 00:29:52.160
were like, I mean, what
do we have to do. We have

399
00:29:52.200 --> 00:29:56.759
to fund a trip to Mexico to
look through something we got to get it.

400
00:29:59.039 --> 00:30:02.079
But I am sort of that on
stuff that I know is being released

401
00:30:02.119 --> 00:30:06.160
as well that people never thought would
be released, and it's hard not being

402
00:30:06.200 --> 00:30:12.559
able to say it, but then
just waiting for people's shock. That's awesome.

403
00:30:12.720 --> 00:30:15.319
Yeah, I'm sure that that moment
has happened a lot over the last

404
00:30:15.319 --> 00:30:19.640
few years because some of these I
mean even like Hitcher from Second Site being

405
00:30:19.680 --> 00:30:23.519
able to be found when everybody thought
that was just yeah, ancient history basically,

406
00:30:23.880 --> 00:30:26.720
I do, but producing for Second
Site now, so I'm on the

407
00:30:26.759 --> 00:30:30.599
other side of it. I'm more
on the curation side, and I've been

408
00:30:30.599 --> 00:30:37.039
doing that for I'm working with Severin
on something obviously at Radiance. I just

409
00:30:37.039 --> 00:30:40.640
did a project for Arrow, which
means I get to bask in other people's

410
00:30:40.680 --> 00:30:45.519
shine. But yeah, the stuff
that goes on behind the scenes to really

411
00:30:45.559 --> 00:30:52.640
get this stuff together is it takes
a lot of commitment and from the people

412
00:30:52.680 --> 00:30:56.680
behind it a mondo. You know, it's only Pete and Jared and the

413
00:30:56.960 --> 00:31:03.440
stuff they go through to restore things, and that is incredible. So there's

414
00:31:03.440 --> 00:31:06.680
a lot of passionate people out there
that will keep this going, I think

415
00:31:07.680 --> 00:31:11.240
well, and with cult films in
general, there's always been some sort of

416
00:31:11.960 --> 00:31:17.920
unfortunate like disrespect, and I'm curious, just with your historical context, if

417
00:31:17.960 --> 00:31:22.440
you think that that has led to
either helping it in you know, possibly

418
00:31:22.480 --> 00:31:25.960
the outrage bringing it to more eyes, or do you think it's hindered it

419
00:31:26.039 --> 00:31:30.680
in terms of like lost elements or
people not getting chances to be as creative

420
00:31:30.680 --> 00:31:33.920
as they need to be. I
don't know, because some of the most

421
00:31:33.920 --> 00:31:38.039
creative stuff, like Roland's was made
under the most difficult circumstances, and that

422
00:31:38.119 --> 00:31:44.279
was definitely something we wanted to show
in the film, because you know,

423
00:31:44.319 --> 00:31:48.200
his budgets were so low and he
was so compromised a lot of the time

424
00:31:48.880 --> 00:31:52.039
that it forced him to be even
more creative. And you know, even

425
00:31:52.079 --> 00:31:56.319
though it was a strike, like
a huge struggle for him. So I

426
00:31:56.359 --> 00:32:00.319
don't know if it's necessarily hindered it. There'll always be that kind of poo

427
00:32:00.319 --> 00:32:04.279
poo in it, the cult thing, and I think nowadays, you know,

428
00:32:04.359 --> 00:32:07.599
it just makes people more emboldened to
say, you know, I'm going

429
00:32:07.680 --> 00:32:13.559
to defend this, because it's like
the underdog. You do still find the

430
00:32:13.599 --> 00:32:16.720
odd person. They all remember the
broth tracks that came out, and there

431
00:32:16.720 --> 00:32:21.039
were a few people they got to
the Beast and then they were like,

432
00:32:21.359 --> 00:32:29.119
oh my god, Oh that is
a gorgeous set too. I was glad

433
00:32:29.160 --> 00:32:31.359
when that came out. And it
seems like overall, I think Cult Epics

434
00:32:31.440 --> 00:32:35.240
or somebody in the US started putting
some of those out as well. So

435
00:32:35.440 --> 00:32:38.759
yeah, I know Jeremy Richie's been
working very closely with them and did his

436
00:32:39.279 --> 00:32:45.200
Sylvia Crystal. But yeah, I
saw that they're doing some stuff. I

437
00:32:45.200 --> 00:32:49.559
don't really get Cult Epics over here. They're quite expensive to import, so

438
00:32:50.200 --> 00:32:52.200
I don't. I don't think I
have any of their discs, but they're

439
00:32:52.200 --> 00:32:58.000
doing some interesting stuff. Yeah.
They put out a Angst, which one

440
00:32:58.000 --> 00:33:00.960
of the best films that it's just
brutal. Oh the German one. Yeah,

441
00:33:01.039 --> 00:33:07.839
oh my god, I fucking love
that film. Uh yeah, Ans

442
00:33:07.960 --> 00:33:10.599
is big with them, and then
they did Gosh, they've done a handful,

443
00:33:10.680 --> 00:33:15.000
like they really hyper focus on certain
things like Sylvia Cristell. They've done,

444
00:33:15.440 --> 00:33:19.559
oh gosh, a lot. But
yeah, Cold they do really good

445
00:33:19.599 --> 00:33:25.799
work overall. Yeah. Yeah,
see there's I just I just wonder where

446
00:33:25.839 --> 00:33:30.519
it's all going, because it's like
you said, there's still thousands of other

447
00:33:30.640 --> 00:33:35.400
things that are yet to be released. And as we get into weirder and

448
00:33:35.480 --> 00:33:40.279
weirder territory, you know, it's
like the sky's the limit. But then

449
00:33:40.319 --> 00:33:45.079
you have companies like to go back
to second Sight, you are a small

450
00:33:45.119 --> 00:33:51.920
company behind the scenes, they put
so much dedication into the restorations, like

451
00:33:52.440 --> 00:33:55.720
Martin for example, and it might
mean that we have to wait a little

452
00:33:55.759 --> 00:34:00.319
bit longer for them. And I
know Martin's been put back quite a few

453
00:34:00.359 --> 00:34:04.480
times and they've made announcements, but
they really want to get it right,

454
00:34:04.720 --> 00:34:09.280
they really really They even tried to
license that legendary what was it, three

455
00:34:09.360 --> 00:34:17.440
hour or four hour directed cut crazy
Yeah, which you know they couldn't unfortunately,

456
00:34:17.519 --> 00:34:21.719
But I love Martin, but I'm
not sure i'd want to sit through

457
00:34:21.800 --> 00:34:25.199
that. Yeah, Martin's good.
I'm really excited for people to see it

458
00:34:25.199 --> 00:34:29.280
because, especially in the US,
it's been a little difficult to see for

459
00:34:29.360 --> 00:34:32.239
a long time with even here.
Yeah, and and and just adding a

460
00:34:32.280 --> 00:34:36.440
decent copy of it that that was
another one where they thought the elements just

461
00:34:36.480 --> 00:34:40.480
weren't there. It added DVD and
it was it was always on my sort

462
00:34:40.480 --> 00:34:46.320
of you know, hassle companies about
list. And then a second site got

463
00:34:46.400 --> 00:34:52.159
hold of it. I did a
commentary on that one which cited about and

464
00:34:52.840 --> 00:34:58.000
yeah, it's just there. Their
restoration is beautiful. They're doing some really

465
00:34:58.039 --> 00:35:01.840
beautiful stuff. Yeah, I mean
their releases are astonishing. It doesn't get

466
00:35:01.880 --> 00:35:06.440
any better than you know, a
full hardcover, one hundred and fifty page

467
00:35:06.480 --> 00:35:14.880
book and soundtrack and yeah, all
brand new special features. It's incredible In

468
00:35:15.000 --> 00:35:19.920
terms of the hobby overall, I
would be remiss to not bring up the

469
00:35:19.920 --> 00:35:23.199
fact that I'm just a cisheit white
guy standing here giving my opinions, and

470
00:35:23.239 --> 00:35:29.239
that's kind of pointless in the grand
sea of things. So in your mind,

471
00:35:29.639 --> 00:35:32.440
there's a lot more diversity coming.
It feels like to me, at

472
00:35:32.519 --> 00:35:36.480
least some people are getting opportunities that
they never got before. How do you

473
00:35:36.559 --> 00:35:39.360
think about that? I think it's
great, and it's one of the reasons

474
00:35:39.400 --> 00:35:45.920
why I wanted to move into production, because, you know, I've always

475
00:35:45.960 --> 00:35:50.000
been quite outspoken about this, but
when I first started doing commentries, with

476
00:35:50.079 --> 00:35:55.280
barely any women doing commentries. When
I first got into sort of you know,

477
00:35:55.519 --> 00:36:00.239
the field, like writing professionally about
your cult, there were barely any

478
00:36:00.280 --> 00:36:06.119
women doing that, and Kayla Janie
really was like the forerunner for everyone,

479
00:36:07.000 --> 00:36:09.960
and it wasn't welcoming, and it's
still not welcoming. I still face a

480
00:36:09.960 --> 00:36:15.840
lot of flak online from certain type
of guys in certain types of communities.

481
00:36:15.880 --> 00:36:21.280
You just they're enraged that a woman
would dare to speak about this stuff and

482
00:36:21.320 --> 00:36:24.559
bring in other stuff. So,
you know, I think it's important that

483
00:36:24.599 --> 00:36:30.079
we have other voices in there.
You know, I wouldn't just hire somebody

484
00:36:30.119 --> 00:36:34.000
because you know, diversity, it
has to be the right person. But

485
00:36:34.119 --> 00:36:38.199
there are so many other people out
there, especially in even working class critics

486
00:36:38.840 --> 00:36:43.280
in Britain. That's a real issue. I am working class and that was

487
00:36:43.320 --> 00:36:47.079
another thing that I faced, was
classism, especially when I was first started

488
00:36:47.119 --> 00:36:54.360
out and certain peers of mine were
not accepting of the pleb that had been

489
00:36:54.400 --> 00:37:00.599
allowed into the ranks and made that
known, and when critic Atch even wrote

490
00:37:00.599 --> 00:37:04.679
a whole essay to that effect,
to saying, you know, well,

491
00:37:04.679 --> 00:37:08.400
I don't go to these exclusive European
film festivals, yeah, because they cost

492
00:37:08.519 --> 00:37:17.199
many and so the more voices the
better, because we get to hear different

493
00:37:17.559 --> 00:37:22.280
views on things. Film is subjective, and you know, if we always

494
00:37:22.320 --> 00:37:24.840
hear from the same voice and the
same type, we're only ever going to

495
00:37:24.920 --> 00:37:30.440
get one view, and that's been
very much the case with things like classic

496
00:37:30.559 --> 00:37:32.719
horror and things like that. But
now you got writers like Kelly Robinson.

497
00:37:32.800 --> 00:37:38.400
He's an amazing researcher breaking through into
that mold and she's incredible and sees all

498
00:37:38.440 --> 00:37:44.320
this other political stuff that's not really
been discussed. So you know, actually

499
00:37:44.400 --> 00:37:49.119
now being able to you know,
bring more people in. And I've always

500
00:37:49.400 --> 00:37:52.559
tried to do that. Yeah,
since I since I started sort of even

501
00:37:52.599 --> 00:37:57.639
as an editor at a magazine,
tried to platform all different types of people.

502
00:37:58.440 --> 00:38:00.400
Actually been able to make a change
in that is really important to me

503
00:38:00.440 --> 00:38:05.159
because it does get frustraight like,
it does get really frustrated when you see

504
00:38:05.320 --> 00:38:10.960
people shut out or whatever. So
it is changing. The revolution is coming.

505
00:38:12.840 --> 00:38:15.519
It is. It's really about that
part that you brought up, where

506
00:38:15.519 --> 00:38:20.239
it's the right person for the job. And it has been genuinely frustrating for

507
00:38:20.360 --> 00:38:23.360
years to see people that don't really
know what they're talking about. Yeah,

508
00:38:23.800 --> 00:38:30.760
I won't name names I have,
and it's just like, oh, yeah,

509
00:38:30.800 --> 00:38:35.519
it's the dude. We'll just bring
the dude in, or someone who's

510
00:38:35.599 --> 00:38:40.079
kind of only half interested in it, and they're just and that to me

511
00:38:40.360 --> 00:38:46.400
just feels really, I don't know, just depressing. It's like I want

512
00:38:46.400 --> 00:38:52.039
to hear somebody who's passionate. He's
going to give me something that I might

513
00:38:52.079 --> 00:38:55.559
not have thought of before, you
know, rather than someone who's just parenting

514
00:38:55.559 --> 00:39:00.280
out the same production history that we
can now read on Wikipedia. I feel

515
00:39:00.320 --> 00:39:05.800
like that type of film criticism is
becoming more and more redundant because at a

516
00:39:06.199 --> 00:39:08.760
tap of a keyboard we can look
at mine. It's not always right,

517
00:39:08.920 --> 00:39:13.920
but you know, we can find
quite a lot of stuff online now very

518
00:39:13.960 --> 00:39:19.199
easily when it comes to production stuff, you know. So I think that

519
00:39:19.280 --> 00:39:24.639
film criticism is slowly sort of moving
out into into something else. People are

520
00:39:24.639 --> 00:39:28.039
bringing a lot more into it,
and I want to see a lot more

521
00:39:28.079 --> 00:39:31.719
of that because that is the is
selfish, That's what I like in film.

522
00:39:35.119 --> 00:39:38.159
No we are the world thing.
It's just that's what personally interests me,

523
00:39:38.320 --> 00:39:43.400
and I want more of it.
And it's uh, I promise this

524
00:39:43.480 --> 00:39:45.840
is not just to you know,
give you pomp and circumstance or anything.

525
00:39:45.840 --> 00:39:50.360
But just reading some of the things
that you write, even you know,

526
00:39:50.440 --> 00:39:54.079
nonchalantly on Facebook or something, it
comes across as somebody that is just open

527
00:39:54.639 --> 00:39:59.559
and honest and feels you know,
passionate about all. It's like you're getting

528
00:39:59.599 --> 00:40:05.840
it and yeah, recently you had
that the Quentin Tarantino thing that you to

529
00:40:05.920 --> 00:40:08.480
me that that falls in exactly with
what we're kind of talking about right here.

530
00:40:08.480 --> 00:40:12.239
It's just the different realm and it's
the same toxic community that like,

531
00:40:12.599 --> 00:40:15.039
you know, the Hell the Hell
Raiser reboot that's coming with a female pin

532
00:40:15.119 --> 00:40:17.800
head and everybody's like, what is
this? We can't do that, Yeah,

533
00:40:17.800 --> 00:40:20.840
we can't have a female pin Head. And it's like, well,

534
00:40:20.840 --> 00:40:24.159
actually, have you read Hell Bound
Heart because you know it wasn't Doug Bradley

535
00:40:24.199 --> 00:40:34.679
in that book. In the book
a queer creative and they're like, you

536
00:40:34.719 --> 00:40:39.239
know, total straight man. It's
like, you know, is Clive Barker

537
00:40:39.440 --> 00:40:45.320
one of the most like transgressive queerest
Like you know, when you're arguing about

538
00:40:45.360 --> 00:40:52.280
the gender of the pin this character
from a series that is like hyper sexual

539
00:40:52.320 --> 00:40:58.199
throughout the entire Hell Raiser just insane. It's sad that there is still that

540
00:40:58.360 --> 00:41:00.320
part of it. But I do
do my part to kick back at it

541
00:41:00.400 --> 00:41:06.480
because you know, I can only
be me and I know some people don't

542
00:41:06.599 --> 00:41:09.440
like that. In critics, they
want critics to you know, be I

543
00:41:09.440 --> 00:41:17.400
guess more professional, but I like
that and kind of opinionated, and especially

544
00:41:17.559 --> 00:41:22.360
about things like this. And it
is sad, but I do find within

545
00:41:22.400 --> 00:41:27.840
the kind of collector community, outside
of very small pockets, there is an

546
00:41:27.840 --> 00:41:34.480
open mindedness from the people. We
are largely male, and obviously not all

547
00:41:34.480 --> 00:41:37.000
collectors are male. There are a
lot of women collectors as well, but

548
00:41:37.079 --> 00:41:40.199
the kind of bulk of that community
and they're very open minded that women doing

549
00:41:40.320 --> 00:41:46.639
countries and stuff. I've not really
experienced from that. It is this core

550
00:41:46.719 --> 00:41:51.280
thing of people that don't even buy
the disks half the time, or read

551
00:41:51.320 --> 00:41:54.719
the stuff, or buy the magazines. You know, they just want to

552
00:41:54.760 --> 00:42:00.239
go online and complain, you know, somebody's in their sound pit. And

553
00:42:00.280 --> 00:42:07.280
it's like they don't want to share
the professional side of it with sharing your

554
00:42:07.320 --> 00:42:12.199
opinion. And I kind of disagree
that they, you know, everybody else

555
00:42:12.199 --> 00:42:15.000
thinks it's not professional to share it
because if you don't share like this,

556
00:42:15.440 --> 00:42:21.000
it takes the personality of it.
It completely erases your identity other than just

557
00:42:21.079 --> 00:42:25.440
your professionalism. It's difficult because when
I first started, I was I was

558
00:42:25.519 --> 00:42:30.400
kind of hyper aware of my class, you know, I was hyper aware

559
00:42:30.440 --> 00:42:34.320
of a lot of things, and
I didn't. I had some great editors,

560
00:42:34.320 --> 00:42:38.360
and I had some really supportive people, especially like Chris Alexander at Fangoria

561
00:42:38.719 --> 00:42:44.840
was great and so I was lucky
there. But I didn't have this like

562
00:42:44.920 --> 00:42:51.079
big welcome thing, big welcome in
matt It was the opposite, which is

563
00:42:51.079 --> 00:42:53.360
funny because when I first started my
blog, I never had my name on

564
00:42:53.440 --> 00:42:57.840
them. Everyone thought I was a
dude and no one ever disagree with me.

565
00:42:57.920 --> 00:43:04.000
And then when I finally cat merged
I'm Cat, That's when it changed.

566
00:43:04.719 --> 00:43:08.599
And so it was difficult and so
I would sense myself because there is

567
00:43:08.679 --> 00:43:15.400
this whole thing I did have.
Without going into too much detail, I

568
00:43:15.440 --> 00:43:19.559
did get pressured by certain people in
the industry. You need to put a

569
00:43:19.599 --> 00:43:22.239
lid on that, you shouldn't do
that, you shouldn't do this. And

570
00:43:22.280 --> 00:43:28.199
I got to this like weird crossroads
and figured, you know, well,

571
00:43:28.440 --> 00:43:30.360
if I never did another commentary again, or I never did this, you

572
00:43:30.400 --> 00:43:34.239
know, I have my magazine,
I could blog, I can do a

573
00:43:34.280 --> 00:43:38.519
podcast. So if I lose that
by being myself, then fine, but

574
00:43:38.639 --> 00:43:43.920
I will just be myself. And
so that's and I'm glad I did because

575
00:43:44.000 --> 00:43:50.440
that was when my career actually really
took off, because there is a kind

576
00:43:50.480 --> 00:43:57.239
of like disingenuous thing around it.
You know that we have to be nice

577
00:43:57.320 --> 00:44:00.000
and professional and we shouldn't really talk
about politics, and we really need to.

578
00:44:00.559 --> 00:44:02.840
And I meet quite a few male
critics so like, well, I

579
00:44:02.880 --> 00:44:07.480
don't really like talking about politics.
Films should be escapism. And it's like

580
00:44:07.679 --> 00:44:10.880
it's because you don't have to talk
about politics. You know, that's your

581
00:44:10.920 --> 00:44:15.320
privilege, but some of us don't
have that privilege. We have to bring

582
00:44:15.320 --> 00:44:20.199
it into what we're doing. You
know, we can't ignore it. We

583
00:44:20.199 --> 00:44:22.639
don't get the privilege to ignore it. And just so I'm going to lock

584
00:44:22.639 --> 00:44:25.400
myself away with my DVDs and ignore
all this. And you shouldn't put that

585
00:44:25.480 --> 00:44:30.239
online. And occasionally it gets heated, and occasionally I get guys who kind

586
00:44:30.239 --> 00:44:34.960
of take it very personally. And
I had one who stalk me for a

587
00:44:35.000 --> 00:44:38.480
few years over it because I laughed
at someone posting a meme at him.

588
00:44:39.519 --> 00:44:44.400
Another one who recently resurfaced, I
kicked him off my page two years ago,

589
00:44:44.760 --> 00:44:50.079
got massive graduate against me and all
I could say was are you like,

590
00:44:50.239 --> 00:44:55.559
what are you doing? Wow?
So yeah, there's that there's that

591
00:44:55.840 --> 00:45:01.159
to deal with. So many people
don't understand those actions affect people, and

592
00:45:01.400 --> 00:45:08.400
really I'm laughing, but sometimes it
does. Sometimes it gets really intrusive.

593
00:45:08.880 --> 00:45:14.440
And I don't think I know a
single woman in this industry that's not doubt

594
00:45:14.440 --> 00:45:19.320
with that on some level, which
is unfortunate. Well, and fortunately it

595
00:45:19.400 --> 00:45:22.559
kind of leads to the one thing
that made me originally reach out because you

596
00:45:22.599 --> 00:45:25.239
had posted this on your Facebook.
Hopefully everybody could pause and read this.

597
00:45:25.599 --> 00:45:30.719
Oh yeah, I'm scared what you
were going to bring up there, no,

598
00:45:30.719 --> 00:45:34.800
no, no, nothing bad.
For those that maybe are just going

599
00:45:34.840 --> 00:45:36.840
to listen all the way through and
then go back and read this, I'm

600
00:45:36.880 --> 00:45:38.559
not going to have it up the
whole time. But it is about imposter

601
00:45:38.679 --> 00:45:44.199
syndrome and for some and I still
get that now, you know, I

602
00:45:44.320 --> 00:45:47.000
still I never take him for granted, the fact I get to do this

603
00:45:47.079 --> 00:45:52.559
work right, and you know the
fact that you know that meant that I

604
00:45:52.599 --> 00:45:58.679
was able to stay home with my
son and take care of him, because

605
00:45:58.760 --> 00:46:00.519
I've never taken that for granted.
But there is a lot of the time

606
00:46:00.559 --> 00:46:02.960
where I'm just like, everything I've
done is shit, this is shit.

607
00:46:04.039 --> 00:46:07.960
I don't think I've ever like submitted
a single thing, even the Roland film.

608
00:46:07.960 --> 00:46:12.320
At one point, I was just
so convinced that I was going the

609
00:46:12.360 --> 00:46:15.719
wrong way that I was I think
I need to get another writer in And

610
00:46:15.800 --> 00:46:20.119
I wrote that because I wanted other
people to know that, you know,

611
00:46:20.280 --> 00:46:24.159
just because you've been successful whatever,
doesn't mean that you don't still feel that

612
00:46:25.199 --> 00:46:30.159
it's natural. But I see it
as well. You care. At least

613
00:46:30.239 --> 00:46:34.480
you care, you know. I've
met people that don't feel like that,

614
00:46:34.639 --> 00:46:40.239
and generally their work's not very good, and because they never question it.

615
00:46:40.519 --> 00:46:45.760
And when I did first start blogging
about it, only it was only a

616
00:46:45.800 --> 00:46:49.280
decade ago that I started doing this
sort of movement, and I wasn't even

617
00:46:49.360 --> 00:46:53.320
really perfect. It kind of happened
by accident, but I started blogging.

618
00:46:53.440 --> 00:47:00.719
I used to write exclusively and run
on sentences like it was cringe as fuck,

619
00:47:00.719 --> 00:47:06.119
but I worked it. I just
kept taking grammar courses and listening to

620
00:47:06.239 --> 00:47:09.400
my editors and thinking how can I
improve that? And I still do that

621
00:47:09.559 --> 00:47:14.559
now, reading other writers and thinking
what do I like about this? Why

622
00:47:14.679 --> 00:47:17.760
is this good? I don't think
you should ever stop doing that if you're

623
00:47:17.800 --> 00:47:22.719
making stuff, you know, if
you're sort of creating stuff. But Unfortunately

624
00:47:22.719 --> 00:47:27.559
some people don't. But so many
people reach out and say, I didn't

625
00:47:27.599 --> 00:47:31.360
think you would feel like that,
and it's like, no, it's normal.

626
00:47:31.440 --> 00:47:37.079
I think it's part of the process
that we love to talk about and

627
00:47:38.320 --> 00:47:43.320
the funny thing and hopefully to make
this relative for this channel a little bit

628
00:47:43.360 --> 00:47:46.800
more. You are literally like a
dream guest. You are the type of

629
00:47:46.800 --> 00:47:52.800
person that I see as film school
in a see which I don't. I've

630
00:47:52.920 --> 00:47:57.199
never been able to connect myself to
that. I don't know. Maybe it's

631
00:47:57.280 --> 00:48:00.440
because you know, a lot of
my life is this in mundane, being

632
00:48:00.480 --> 00:48:07.519
a single mum, you know,
and you know the communities I live in,

633
00:48:07.079 --> 00:48:12.199
people aren't watching the films I watch
or remotely interested in film. Half

634
00:48:12.199 --> 00:48:16.840
the people I know don't even know
what the fuck I do, and so

635
00:48:16.960 --> 00:48:22.239
it kind of I don't know,
it doesn't seem real to me in that

636
00:48:22.320 --> 00:48:25.599
way. Whenever I do a podcast
or a commentary, I'm just I kind

637
00:48:25.599 --> 00:48:30.320
of forget that it's going to be
broadcast. Even now I'm talking to you

638
00:48:30.559 --> 00:48:36.480
totally suddenly become aware that it will
be on YouTube. But no, I

639
00:48:36.559 --> 00:48:38.480
never think of it in those turns. And then people say that, and

640
00:48:38.519 --> 00:48:44.199
I'm like, I don't know.
I just, yeah, it is something

641
00:48:44.199 --> 00:48:46.679
that I struggle with immenseally, and
so when I read that, it was,

642
00:48:47.000 --> 00:48:51.119
you know what, she's on my
side. It's somebody that I can

643
00:48:51.239 --> 00:48:54.639
reach out to. It is somebody
that shares a similar struggle. And there's

644
00:48:54.679 --> 00:48:57.880
a lot of people out there that
I'm sure you're dealing with it as well.

645
00:48:57.920 --> 00:49:00.280
And this is, you know,
a proof of exact concept of what's

646
00:49:00.280 --> 00:49:04.960
going on in your mind that even
those that are immensely successful, the good

647
00:49:04.960 --> 00:49:07.840
ones, at least, they question
their abilities and they push themselves to do

648
00:49:07.920 --> 00:49:13.079
better and they make sure that they're
on track. I think it's important that

649
00:49:13.119 --> 00:49:16.880
we talk about this stuff. We
shouldn't like keep it hidden and pretend that

650
00:49:16.920 --> 00:49:22.679
we're doing okay, because that doesn't
help anyone. You know. I started

651
00:49:22.679 --> 00:49:25.079
out and I didn't really know anything, and I just thought, is this

652
00:49:25.239 --> 00:49:29.880
normal? You know? There were
times that I just kept just thought I'm

653
00:49:29.920 --> 00:49:34.000
just going to give up, it's
like and then I was lucky that I

654
00:49:34.039 --> 00:49:38.480
had some people early on that were
honest with me, and we're like,

655
00:49:38.639 --> 00:49:43.159
you know, it's okay, Like
just keep going. And I think it's

656
00:49:43.199 --> 00:49:46.400
really important for me to pay that
back in some way. And just say

657
00:49:46.400 --> 00:49:52.679
to people, look, you know, it doesn't all this idea of you

658
00:49:52.719 --> 00:49:53.960
know, success, it doesn't really
mean anything. At the end of the

659
00:49:54.039 --> 00:49:59.840
day, you're still you. You're
still you sat at your computer probably doing

660
00:49:59.840 --> 00:50:01.480
what there it is on your own. Well, you have guests on,

661
00:50:01.679 --> 00:50:06.400
but most of the time you're on
your own doing stuff, and so it

662
00:50:06.440 --> 00:50:10.039
doesn't Yeah, it doesn't change you, but it is okay to feel like

663
00:50:10.119 --> 00:50:15.840
that. It's absolutely okay to feel
that you fucked up or you know you're

664
00:50:15.880 --> 00:50:23.199
not good enough. Just let that
sit for a moment. Yeah, our

665
00:50:23.199 --> 00:50:29.599
background is in social science, is
mine, So it does, I think

666
00:50:29.679 --> 00:50:32.800
come into my film work a lot. Oh yeah, I can certainly see

667
00:50:32.800 --> 00:50:36.280
that. I don't think I had
known that, and yet you can certainly

668
00:50:36.320 --> 00:50:40.360
feel it, especially in God there
was an essay that you did something recently.

669
00:50:40.719 --> 00:50:43.639
I feel like an idiot now that
I don't know which one, but

670
00:50:44.599 --> 00:50:45.960
yeah, the way you speak,
you can just tell. And I'm I

671
00:50:46.000 --> 00:50:50.599
have a psychology major myself, so
just dealing with a lot of what goes

672
00:50:50.639 --> 00:50:54.920
on mentally and can be long lasting
for people that happens at home, but

673
00:50:55.000 --> 00:51:00.079
also through art, and the way
that we can progress is by celebrating this

674
00:51:00.199 --> 00:51:05.559
art and learning from it and expanding
our horizons. That's what it's about,

675
00:51:05.599 --> 00:51:08.239
isn't it. Film Really, for
me anyway, is very much about connection.

676
00:51:09.719 --> 00:51:14.519
Yeah, I've talked about this,
I've written essays on it. You

677
00:51:14.559 --> 00:51:17.519
know. Obviously there's an intellectual part
about it, especially if you're writing a

678
00:51:17.519 --> 00:51:22.559
book or an essay. But to
me, first and foremost always, film

679
00:51:22.599 --> 00:51:25.559
has been about connecting to other people, like hearing a song and you hear

680
00:51:25.599 --> 00:51:30.000
a lyric in it, you know, And that could even be something like

681
00:51:30.119 --> 00:51:35.960
I don't know, American Rickshaw or
whatever, but anywhere that I can find

682
00:51:36.039 --> 00:51:40.119
something that touches me in a way, that's really what it's about. And

683
00:51:40.159 --> 00:51:45.679
I don't think that's a bad thing. I think we should celebrate that exactly.

684
00:51:45.639 --> 00:51:50.400
Well, speaking of celebrating, kat
is sending her son off to college,

685
00:51:50.519 --> 00:51:53.119
so I'll let her get back to
her family. So much for taking

686
00:51:53.119 --> 00:51:57.119
the time. Oh, thank you, thank you. I enjoyed this.

687
00:51:57.840 --> 00:52:00.400
I hope someday we can get you
back on and do process a little more.

688
00:52:00.440 --> 00:52:05.719
Definitely, definitely thank you for watching
everybody, and we'll see you next

689
00:52:05.760 --> 00:52:32.159
time. Tell me no

