Nowhere in man's history does he display more tenacity, more perseverance than in his
search for eternal youth. Holding. The relentless process of aging has been a
constant dream of man's and of woman's each youth. Is it really a dream?
Or is it possible? At somewhere someone found the secret. The following
experience gave me a new attitude on the whole subject of youth and aging.
September twenty eight, o five PM. William Cobby, aged twenty two,
deeply concerned with retaining his youthful vigor his trim physique. This concern had made
him a dedicated jogger. Cobby would never know if they jogging really helped.
He was the first of a series of Chicagolans who were spared the ordeal of
seeing their youth slip away slowly. That was the voice of reporter Carl Kolchak
in The Case that We Are Calling The Youth Killer. Originally released March fourteenth,
nineteen seventy five. It was directed by Don McDougall and written by our
old friend Rudy Borchett. Actually Don McDougall's also an old friend. He directed
Legacy of Terror and Rudy Borchett. Gosh, what was that? It was
the Trivy Collection. I am joined, of course by my co host,
supreme mister christass you no, I'm here And this was this was an episode
of Colchack that we watched. It was definitely an episode, Yeah, it
was. It was. It was interesting. There were a lot of good
parts and a couple couple of strange colchacky things. But I actually liked this
episode a lot. Did you have a chance to read the script? I
did not have a chance to read the script. There were some interesting differences.
The balance between the B story and the A story was a little bit
better. So our A story is a series of murders that are happening that
Kathy Lee Crosby, who we fine. So I remembered Kathy Crosby mostly from
That's Incredible, but I didn't realize that That's Incredible was nineteen seventy nine,
eighty eighty one. She was known primarily as being a big tennis star.
Apparently she got her start in tennis and then she started doing the acting thing,
and she was all over the place, both as herself in things like
Battle the Network Stars, and then a ton of guest appearances, including this
guest appearance here, and yeah, she's looking fantastic in this, and I
think it's very appropriate that she's basically Helen of Troy re not reincarnated, but
has lived. Oh god, she's lived forever, Chris, and she has
to make sacrifices every few years in order voice sounds like something we've seen on
this show multiple times, I'll tell you what. Like, I'm not going
to go down the road of bemoaning that again because we've done it too many
times now. But it's nice that it was a female character. Yeah,
it was nice to have a murder rest instead of our murderer this time.
However, it is the exact same shit we've seen before, and I don't
need to see it again. And guess what, They've got one episode and
I don't think we're seeing it again, So three times in twenty episodes.
Well, not only was I thinking of Ericastrata in this episode, but I
was also thinking of the episode that we just recently saw of the Coal Check
two thousand and five series, where it was the woman with the super sharp
teeth and the boys that were maybe her son's, maybe not. But I
was just like, Okay, here we go again. That's what it reminded
me of more than the original Cold Check was the reboot almost like very beat
for beat. So she's going around and killing all of these people, and
then it just so happens that her gig is that she has created an online
dating service so that she can or sorry, I should say a computer dating
service. Yeah, computer dating service, so that she can find the most
perfect specimens in Chicago, male or female, doesn't matter. She wants the
most perfect people so that she can sacrifice them to hectate the goddess and then
be able to get this eternal life that she's had for however many years now.
And luckily, Carl has been put on for the best story. He's
been put on the case of trying to write a story about or he's been
told by Vincenzo because New York wants that. New York wants a story.
Carl wants a story about the single scene, and you got to write about
it. Hecate is the god of herbs and poisonous plants. Like she's she's
not the god of beauty. She's like part of the underworld. That's where
she lives. In Greek mythology, in Greek religion is under the underworld.
I don't understand why that was the character that was picked as the one that
she's praying to. Yeah, it kind of reminds me again going back to
the Ericastrada one where it's like, well, katz a kuwadal would make more
sense than who you're saying, because that's supposed to be a good guy that
you're making sacrifices too. But whatever, it feels like, just just pick
some shit and we're gonna go with it, and people aren't gonna I mean,
nobody's gonna go and do like us. And you know, look,
I mean that's that's fair, Like I get it. But okay, like
that, that to me is just it's a I mean, look again,
we're overthinking it because the show came out fifty plus years ago and they didn't
they were just oh heckat sure, why not. But but again, that
whole the whole thing where it's just another sacrifice, I kind of overlooked it
because this episode was a lot of fun. There were some really fun side
characters like Dwayne Hickman is Sergeant Orkin. We get Gordy the goul back the
final time he's only been in it three times. I was so happy to
see Gordy. I was so excited when I was reading the screenplay. I
read the screenplay before I watched it, and when Gordy the Goul showed up
in there, I was like, there's no way, there's no way he's
coming back. I mean, we haven't seen him in what sixteen episodes or
something. There's no way he's going to be there. Sure enough, there's
Gordony the cool I'm trying to remember the last episode we saw him, and
I want to say it was they are, they have been, they will
be. They have been, they are, they will be, And that
would, like you said, that was a long time ago. I don't
know why he wasn't in more because if you go on IMDb and you look
at like the build buy and who's been in every episode, he is like
five people down. Darren mcavin, Simon Oakland, Jack Grinnage, Ruth McDevitt,
Craig Arbaxley who played you know, mister Ring and then apparently he plays
the monster in the next episode, and then you have John Fiedler. Yeah,
he was a more of a stunt man than a behind the camera guy.
But other than him in front of the camera with masks on. So
yeah, I was actually surprised because I was like, whoa shit, John
Fiedler's pack, Like what just randomly, It's like they're just acting like Dave
He's been in every episode, Dude, Hey, I'm back Gordy. It's
like what since when? And then we know that Jack Rennage wasn't in everything,
because there were a couple of times where he was over in Europe or
doing other stuff and it was just like, oh, yeah, Ron's on
assignment. But outside of the fact that we finally get to see Gordy again,
we did get George Savalas, yes, Telly Savalas's brother, and Kathleen
Freeman who's great in everything, and also Eddie Firestone playing what I can only
describe to be Gill from The Simpsons in human form, like that's his character,
Like, Hey, I'm I own my own business, like okay,
cool man. George Savalas being billed as the Masthenese in this episode. When
that title came up on the screen, I was like, who the what
am I missing? They were calling him cat yeah, but his his actor
name. Yeah, that was kind of crazy. I don't know what that
was all about. That was a little bizarre, but he's great, right.
I kind of wish George saval Us would have been a regular character because
he seemed to be like the man on the street guy that Carl really needed,
right like the oh, like he's my guy who takes me places like
I would have I would have loved that if that had been a bigger part
of the show, because you know, Colcheck never really had someone who wasn't
in the office as like a reoccurring character, and that's something I honestly think
the show was missing as Like another component was the kind of on the beat
on the street person Johnny, the guy that polishes his shoes, like from
police squad or something. What's the word in the street Johnny. I don't
know. I hear a lot of things. Pick a topic. One.
Look, we were never going to have a cop being that on the show
because Colcheck has always had even in this episode with Sergeant Orkin, like you
expect that you're almost going to have this like changeup of his a changeup of
his relationship with the cops. But there's it's not that it ends up.
It ends up one scene and then it's right back to the same you know,
antagonistic cop nonsense, which I was like, oh man, this is
going to be different, and then it wasn't, and I was really kind
of disappointed. Honestly, I want to say that there might have been like
one more scene that was in the script, because after please help me out
here, because it's one of those weird things where I'm like, Okay,
I read the script and now I saw the thing, and now I can't
remember which is which. Does he end up hearing back from Sergeant Orkin and
hearing your right, those prints match these old people. No, okay,
nope, that's in the script. The the final scene is throwing of the
pin wheel at cool. Okay, yeah, there's more to it, which
is a bummer. That's a bummer that there was not a bigger wrap up,
and you know, I always try to read the script ahead of time.
This was the only time I haven't gotten to read a script recently,
and I felt like if I had read that, I probably would have been
missing it too, because it needed it. It needed some little third bit
to put a cap on their relationship. So he's like, well, I
should have listened to Colchick, because there's never that moment, and to be
fair, there's never really that moment in the show anyway, so it kind
of tracks with the rest of the show. This episode almost has too many
things going on because there are just little shades of stuff that are missing.
It's like the whole thing of Tony has this whole subplot where he is going
to work out and he's eating right and all this stuff, and there's more
to that as well, like when Carl gets called into his office and Tony's
there, like stuck in the lotus position. There had been a scene where
Carl saw him in the lotus position and was like, what are you doing?
And then he explains, you know, oh I'm now I'm mastering yoga,
and he's just so full of himself. And then when he finally calls
for help from Carl, that's that breaking point. So we get much more
of like Tony being in charge of himself and you know, bettering himself alf
and like he even yells at Carl because Carl wants to rather than that donut,
Carl wants to tempt him by going down to like a greasy spoon diner,
and Tony's like, oh, you're not gonna have me pay for your
lunch and try to get by on the company dole and da da da da
da. So it's there's a lot more to that. There's a lot more
to the whole dating thing. There's one thing I want to read to you
because it is amazing. He goes, he has Tony yells at him like
I had this kid go around town and get you all of these papers and
all of these different catalogs for these dating places. And carl sits down at
his desk and he picks up a copy of a magazine called Singles Weekly,
and he reads his voice over is the single scene had indeed changed. Carl
leaves through the tabloid to the classified ads. Reads one white female, twenty
two good bod digs, light B and D, passive SNL, classical music
and water sports. No weirdos or Republicans please, there is no way that
that would have That's exactly what I said. And then the next one is
Carlos thoughtful form for a moment, reads another ad group square dancing, old
time fund singles or couples refreshments, nudity optional. Yeah, and it just
this whole scene is like him saying, like the most conservative newspaper in Chicago
had a classified column headed social clubs. The ads offered photo mating, Jewish
Polish, oriental introductions, computer matching, astrological matching. But it all boils
down to a simple need. So that's when he goes to see Bella.
Yeah, there's a lot more to him with this hell Singles thing, and
that's a bummer because, look, you know, ultimately at the end of
the day was something like this show the time constraint. Look, you know
there is a time constraint, but it's not like another show that I'm watching
right now for another podcast, like where Wolf. It's not a twenty three
minute show. This is a full hour long show. So there's some stuff
in this, like the whole subplot with Irvin that could have been completely cut
down. Well again, it's like Rudy is writing a script that seventy seven
pages long, and I'm like, this is not a ninety minute show where
you're leaving some room for commercials. What are you doing even handing in a
seventy seven page script Because maybe he knew that it was going to get cut
down anyways, could be, but I mean, every single one of these
pieces, and there's even a moment in the show where it like fades out
kind of quickly, and I was like, oh, there is more to
that. There's more to that particular scene. So it's like it almost looks
like they shot it and then just cut it out. It's a total bummer
because I actually kind of like this episode, even though we've talked about how
similar it is to some of the other ones. I thought it was.
Yeah, it was intriguing. I really liked some of the effects works they
were doing. I mean, yeah, old age makeup has come very far
since then. Boy right, But like the scene of the woman on the
balcony who's doing aerobics and she goes down, comes back up, and she's
older, goes down, comes back up and she's older still. I mean
that was it was a cheap effect, but it was really effective. Can
I ask you something, though, why do you think with the character of
Irvin they had someone playing him as an old man versus everyone else? It
was just the young actor an old person makeet That was kind of a strange
choice. It's a strange choice considering I mean, was it because we had
been following him? I mean, he just dies on a bench and then
the next scene, we get another character who just dies in their bed.
But it would have made more sense if you're going to do it once,
to just do it every time and just have like an older actor portraying that
person. It just seemed it was an odd choice. Yeah, the person
that dies in their bed. I was really scratched my head over that one.
I was like, did we need one more murder here? This is
kind of strange. The answer is no, because it felt just like,
oh, so I we get it. So it's it's just increasing the body
count. Two men and two women. Go oh okay. That's another one
where I was just like, I don't even remember that being in the script,
So why would they shoot that and not some of this other stuff that
actually like adds to the whole overall episode. But can you please tell me
what it is with Greek characters and having these bizarre home remedies, Because the
immediately when I saw him putting mayonnaise mayonnaise on Colcheck's hand, I thought of
Windex from my big fag Greek wedding. The whole thing of the cab and
them talking outside the cab and the conventionaire. You know you talked about Gil
coming to life from The Simpsons pretty much? Was he not? I think
that that's supposed to be in the cab And then they end up going to
a mechanics place and they put mechanics grease on his hand rather than mayonnaise,
because that was bizarre. Well, I mean even the show acknowledges how bizarre
it is, because Vincenzo goes, who the hell are you? Like,
Yeah, exactly who the hell is this guy? This Telly savals his brother
just in the you know, the ions like building, Like, what the
hell? Like, why is he in there with him? It's bizarre.
He does not look like Telly Savalas, Oh doesn't he not. That's that's
fine, though it would have been a little distracted. Oh yeah, I
mean if he just had like the word schlub written across him, it was
amazing. Yeah, he's a big old schluve, like an emphasis on the
big because a big old guy too. But he's great. I like him.
He portrays exactly what I was expecting from that kind of character in this
kind of show. Oh. Another thing that I forgot to tell you was
Carl is arguing with Vincenzo about covering the singles and he was like trying to
give him other people to do it, so like, oh, miss Emily's
too old. And then Ron it was like he had like this whole thing
about Ron doing the singles thing, and I was just like, oh again,
we're trying to pretend that Ron has had hersexual Okay, thanks, well
again, this is this is the seventies. But I know, I know,
but I mean, it can't have Light B and D in here,
but we can't have Ron being gay. Well they didn't have that in there
though, to be fair, well, but we did get that reference when
he's on the phone to the Yenta and he's just like, you know,
oh, I don't need a girl right now, and miss Emily is saying
good night and she thinks that he's ordering a prostitute. Yeah, that's true,
but it's not as overt as hey, Ron's gay true, or Light
B and D and water sports which who in the seventies would have known that
water sports is being paid on. But again, I will say this much
about the end of the episode. It has one of the best shots in
the series together where Colcheck is getting out of his car and all of a
sudden it's like really lit well, and it's like a tracking shot. It
like zooms out and then follows him into the building. It's really weird because
I was like, we don't get these like kind of high class shots in
this show. And then on top of everything else, col Tex straight up
breaks the fourth wall, yeah, right, which is not common. He's
like normally talking to you, but not directly at you. And at the
end of this episode he is talking at the audience like he is full on
facing the camera and I was like, what where did huh? Well,
that's kind of what they were trying to do with that last episode where he
looks at the camera that's in the wall and it's like you believe me,
don't you? Or whatever he was supposed to say when he was in the
a scene asylum, right, But in this episode it's it is that come
to fruition, but in a way that is just it's not that it doesn't
work, but it doesn't work like it's I am. I am appreciative of
what it is, but honestly, it feels a little ham fisted, and
by a little I mean a lot, because it's just it's they haven't done
that before, and the time that they were thinking about doing it in the
last episode they bailed out of it for whatever reason. Seems like there's something
else I was going to say about this episode, and I'm trying to remember
what it is. Is it that Colchack destroying the temple is amazing? He
is the laziest destroyer of a temple you have ever seen. He's just oh,
walking around, just lazily throwing. He's like, it might be the
best thing I've ever seen in this show. Colchack just like a yeah there's
column, sure, oh there's bust whatever. Yeah, this that whatever.
It's so lazy in the best way. It's lazy, and only the way
I would believe it's actually Colchack doing it. When Colchack puts on that ring,
he's actually supposed to start getting older. And there's this whole thing again
where it's like, hey, Carl, you looks so good, and they
talk about how it looks like he's aged five years since the last time they
saw him. I'm almost glad that they didn't try to do that, because,
like I said, the old age makeup could be a little distracting,
but thematically, it doesn't make any sense right. Thematically, it makes no
sense act that he would get older, that he wouldn't get older, that
he doesn't get older because everyone else who has the ring on eventually gets older.
And if he's not, then what's special about Colejack? He has the
mark of Kine. That's way. Oh is this not a crossover episode?
Yeah? I keeps looking at that half a gumby hanging from his windshield.
Ultimately, this episode is pretty good and Kathy Lee Crosby's a great female villain
and she's actually a pretty solid actress in this I like how apparently also,
a midnight interview, if you're a journalist, means you're breaking and entering.
We're going out for one of the midnight interviews, Coljack. That's b an
a dude, Like, that's straight up breaking and entering. Like, what
are you talking about? But I mean again, like we've had our issues
with this show, namely the way the villain's arc is resolved, and in
this episode it's resolved really well. She turns into a statue, Like that's
great. That works thematically in the context of the story. And it's not
that it's not believable, but it makes sense for what they were going with
for the mythology behind the villain right, and that Caz says, like she
looks exactly like every statue I've ever seen of Helen of Troy, and it's
like, okay, and if you disappoint the gods, you get turned into
stone. It just fits perfectly. And it's not one of those like they
couldn't find any traces or turns into a funny looking skeleton or something, or
is stabbed with a stick right, or becomes a dog and never turns back
again, or is stabbed with a stick. That's the one that will constantly
stick in my mind. The MATCHI mideo who just gets stabbed with a stick.
Oh you know, you could just take a battle axe and hold it
out and then the suit of armor just falls around it. A werewolf just
jumps off of a ship. Yeah later, Yeah pretty uh you know.
In regards to the way the villains tie up in the show, I might
go out on a limb and say that this is the best we've seen.
I think I'm there with you. Yeah, it's really good and it works,
and it makes it honestly makes a lot of sense, Like it makes
more sense than anything else we've seen in the show. Regarding a villain dying
in quotations. Yeah, this was a surprise that it was this solid,
because it's like, yeah, I mean, like, okay, the Trevy
Collection had a little bit of a problem with the way that he, you
know, that villain ended up, But like mister I n G, I
think this one, this goes in kind of the higher levels of of you
know, episodes. For me, I would agree. I mean, we're
look, I don't want to spoil the fun here, but we are one
episode away from the show being over, which something about one season shows I
know something about is that at the end of this we are going to want
more and we are not going to get anymore. And I am disappointed by
that because the last couple episodes have been pretty good and it feels almost like
the show is settling into a groove and the next episode is the last one.
Yeah, and I'm very curious to see what the next episode brings because
that's another al Ford Neil and John Huff episode and they were the ones that
gave us mister r I n G. So really very curious to see what
the centuries like. Yeah, me too, because again, this is a
really this was a really well done episode, and Richard if you're listening,
You're welcome. I was positive for once, so there you go. I
really can't find much wrong with this episode. No, and like you said,
those guest spots are fantastic. I love Dwayne Hickman, so was seeing
him in here. I was so happy. And you're right. As far
as Kathleen Freeman, she is always great. She is such a comic genius.
She used to be in a lot of the old Cherry Lewis stuff and
she could take him toe to toe. She was just a solid, solid
comedian. I just think of her from the Third Naked Gun movie and obviously
from the Blues Brothers. Oh my god, yes, yeah, so but
again, she's great in this and honestly, with the way we've had this
show going, with the way the show has gone, with how great the
like supporting characters have been, it's not surprising that she's good. But I
really like the fact that this episode's side characters almost steal the show because they're
all memorable, especially Telly Savalas's brother. Poor guy. He's probably always known
as Telly Savalas's brother, right, or Demosthites, Demo Steenies or whatever his
fake name is. I was looking through his filmography to see if he had
been called that any other time, and I wasn't seeing it. I wonder
if it was just to not bill him as tells of all as his brother
could be kind of weird, right, well, not really. I mean
when you and I talked about Lone Wolf and Cub, I mean Wakayama Thomas
a Burro. His name is a made up name because he is Katsu Shintaro.
Yeah, Kartsu Shintaro, I think, is the guy who played Zatuichi.
He was more of a star than his brother, and so he didn't
want to have the same name and be like, oh, it's the other
you know guy, So he took a completely different name. So I can
see Demosthenes doing the same thing. He was billed as Demosthenes to avoid confusion
with his brother. That's what it says. That's what it says an IMDb
and IMDb would never lie. It's got to be true, then it must
be true. So next month we are back and we're going to be covering
something a little different. We're not changing into an X Files podcast, but
we are covering it. An episode of The X Files, which was supposed
to be an episode of the Coal Chuck reboot, which is called Molder and
Scully Meet the wear Monster. It was based off of the script The M
Word, so we'll be talking both about the M word and Molder and Scully
Meet the wear Monster. What a horrible title, that is? Why are
we talking about the M word or Molder and Sculling Meet the wear a Monster?
Meet the wear a Monster. Yeah? I think it kind of works
in like a Pope comic book way, but that's not it's a little too
on the nose for its own good. I mean, at least like The
X Files didn't try to do. There are like shows out there that have
theme names to them. Now, so like you mean, like Chuck,
is that right? Chuck was like Chuck versus the That was the that was
the episode titles was always Chuck versus the and then the real was one of
the episodes where Chuck versus the Pink Banana or some horseshit like Friends, right,
I mean, Friends were the ones that came up with that dumb naming
convention. The Friends Friends one was the one with something right. I've never
seen a single episode of Friends. So hashtag roast me, please, You're
better off for it, I guess so, but everybody loves it, not
me, everybody but you. Yeah, And honestly, your opinion is more
important than the general public. Thank you, Chris. But here's the thing.
I am an X Files fan. I didn't watch that episode of the
show. Well, I look forward to seeing it with you for the first
time. Me too, I look forward to finding out if it is as
bad as everything else that came before and after it, with those reboots,
because those reboots spoilers were not good. Ah. This is one of the
few that I watched from that season. I think I watched actually the first
three, and I quit after watching this, So maybe that we'll say something.
I mean, I remember watching the Mythology episodes and thinking to myself,
good, great, Chris Carter's back to his old bullshit again. He's back
on that bullshit, because that's I mean, anyone who's a fan of The
X Files, and I'm sure some of you listening are, you know that
once Chris Carter got on that bullshit with the Mythology, the show just nosedived
real hard. It just never felt like he knew where it was going.
Well, it's like the jj Abrams mystery boxing right, I know what the
boxes, but I will never tell you what the contents are. And once
I start telling you what the contents are, it is immensely disappointing. And
the X Files kind of had the same problem. Yeah, I'm sure Ray
is related to the Skywalkers somehow. Oh dear God, Oh my god,
Chris, what is going on with you in your life? Sir? Right
now, we are third episode of the one season shows coming out. If
we had never done this podcast, cole Check probably would have been a show.
We would have done a one season show season because it only lasted one
season. And honestly, the effects and the influence of Colcheck cannot be understated
or overstated or stated enough, frankly, because I would say a lot of
modern television takes from Colcheck. So we're doing the one season show where we
talk about shows that only lasted one season. We are still talking about Werewolf
from nineteen eighty seven, which it's kind of like The Incredible Hulk meets I
Don't Know a Werewolf. Just replaced the Hulk with a werewolf, and you've
got Werewolf of the TV show. And also, I do a podcast called
the Culture Cast where we talk about movies once a week you're on there sometimes
this month we're talking about weird nineties comedies and boy there are a lot of
them. And you and I do a little podcast with a good friend of
ours called Dreams for Sale where we talk about twilds of nineteen eighty five,
So a lot of kind of not vintage but you know, pre Golden Age
or Golden Age of TV, before there was such a term being used for
everything TV. Where can people find you? What are you up to?
Well, we are in the midst of Chechtember over at the Projection Booth Projection
Booth podcast dot com, and yeah, we're just looking at Czechoslovakian Actually,
we've got some Slovakian centric films, even one from Milan Nasa or whatever that
middle part between like Bohemia and Slovakia is. So I'm learning more about the
actual layout of Czechoslovakia right now, the former Czechoslovakia aka the Czech Republic plus
Slovakia whatever. So yeah, that's what I'm up to. It's pretty exciting.
Come on down to the Projection Booth. You'll talk about movies and get
a history lesson, a little bit of geography, a little bit of history,
maybe some math. Oh the sadness. I can tell you that,
yeah, definitely. As someone whose family is from Eastern Europe, boy,
the Eastern European history is just one long famine. They're not all Oldiita sax
Nova, so there are some funny ones in there too. I'm just talking
about the country. That's true, that's true. I want to thank John
Walker for our theme music. I want to thank everybody for listening. Have
you stuck with us this long? You should be impressed. Pat yourself on
the back right now, do it. We love you, We too love
you. I took some pictures, but it seemed pointless. The destruction of
the room would be labeled vandalism or a faulty sprinkler system. I don't need
any photographs of Helen is that she would always be as she always was,
cold and beautiful and unchanging. As a PostScript, I offer this bit of
advice. Should you ever find a ring, no matter how pretty or valuable,
consider well before you slip it on your finger. You may never get
it off again. Bound h Chapter