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Welcome to Softcore History. Hello,
and welcome back to Softcore History. My

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name's Jake Goldman. I'll be your
host for this week. I'm joined as

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always by my two co hosts,
Dandrid Chester and Rob Fox. What's up

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boys? Hello, Hey guys.
Hey, we got a really sporty looking

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Dan Rechester today. Guys, I
don't know if you can see him.

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If you're not watching on YouTube,
you should be check us out on YouTube,

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check out our channel, subscribe to
that shit. Blondes just have more

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fun. Yeah, Danny blond again
should absolutely stay away from any protest about

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Israel and Palestine right now. It
doesn't even matter which side it is,

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those people will be fucking terrified of
you. It's like, maybe you should

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go. I think I'm more racially
ambiguous. You kinda are because I have

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the beard bag. But the blonde
hair makes a blonde blonde hair and the

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beard. Yeah, so I'm like
a gay Palestinian or a fucking like dude

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who has like knockoff SS uniforms in
his or just Portuguese. Yeah, I'm

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just embracing my roots. Yeah,
but that should just be you're literally bleaching

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your roots. What are you talking
about? I know, whitewashing away classic.

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That's our show, guys. I
mean that's Portugal though, that is

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Portugal. That's very port and through. I'm going back to the Homeland in

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December. So it's I'm jealous of
all those countries that get off the hook

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for their imperialism and colonialism because they
just ain't shit now like Prtugal, Belgiumgium,

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Belgium, like sorry, my people
controlled the seas, right, Yeah,

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we had we had a good,
like two hundred year run, uh,

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stunning two hundred year run. Really
good one, one of the best,

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one of the best. You know
what I did this weekend? You

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know I did today? Actually your
episode that you're about to do, I

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did that. Yeah, I did
do that. But I'll tell you in

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a minute. But first you should
check out our patreon. Go to patreon

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dot com slash softcore History. You
get two extra episodes a week, two

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episodes every week. Yeah, so
we do this episode for the masses,

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then we do two and we try
to ring you in for our special boys

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and girl. Boys and girl,
there's two, there's at least two.

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Well you could probably use the plural. Yeah, yeah, they're ladies.

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A couple of ladies. The catalog's
fucking huge because all our stuff's evergreen.

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So it's not just that that too
a week. It's just yeah, massive

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hours and hours, hundreds of hours. But you're right, our demographics like

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ninety four percent. Dudes, it's
you know, I'm cool with it.

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Ladies. Why do you hate history? Yeah? This is on you.

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I'm gonna blame you. Yeah,
I mean that's our spinoff show. Right.

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We eventually just like catalog out,
like like contract out, like Gabby

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and Courtney or something, and it's
soft core history. No, it's hardcore

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her story. Yeah. Okay,
we're going to the opposite way. I

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thought you're gonna be like fully red
Pill. Oh no, okay, that

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seems to work though, but I
will very successful podcast just being misogyny.

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We can have a red Pill one
too. Look, I i'm I'm I

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want to be loose on the red
I want to be like Disney here,

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all right, I don't know everything, right, I want to spectrum podcast,

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a black pilled podcast, a fucking
clear pill, yeah, a fucking

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all the pills pill, yeah,
every pill. I want a pharmaceutical's cabinet

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of all the history podcasts. Yeah. Yeah, but it's weird. I

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don't think we fall under any umbrella
of those. No, we pissed off

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red hats, we pissed off,
we pissed off everybody really confederates, uh,

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libs, libs, everyone really fucking
Normalso I really am just like when

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someone like if you told me,
if you came up to me and you're

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like, dude, someone got pissed
off about something you guys said on the

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podcast, I'd be like, where
who which one? Which which? Yeah?

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What corner was it? Because we
were we were factually an accurator.

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We said something mean, which one
was it? So so different, there's

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so many points of failure for us. I am only upset if we pissed

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somebody off because we're not funny.
Yeah, that's the only thing I can

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It's like, if this is not
entertaining, if we don't, you know,

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get you through that hour, mute, then I apologize. That's that's

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the only time I will apologize.
Yeah. But what I did today,

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I actually did a foraging class today. What I went foraging in the woods?

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Why do you have to take a
class? Why are you LARPing as

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a truffle pig? I won?
I was not foraging for fun. Guy,

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So I was not LARPing. You're
a squirrel, Yes, I was

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LARPing as a squirrel, a squirrel
boy, that's right. In the rain,

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I spent two hours just picking plants
and eating them, not just that

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somebody had to teach you how to
do so. Yeah. Yeah, you

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know why because when people self teach
that ship they die in a bus like

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an asshole. They die in a
bus like an asshole. Rule Number one

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of forging is lets someone that's written
a book about it teach you how to

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do it. Like well, except
for that guy on the bus. He

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was right now, I want you
to refer to me as Supertramp now,

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not dragon anymore, just super Tramp. Why in his honor? Oh right,

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right right? Yeah? Yeah,
the boy, our boy from memory.

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I mean, I'm of the belief
that anyone who calls himself an auto

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di deck deserves to die. But
if you believe you're an auto did act

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up specifically about mushrooms? Yeah,
then no. We asked the guy that

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was teaching, were like, oh, we're gonna learn about mushroom shoes.

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Like, dude, that's just a
whole different ballgame, Like do you think

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as he was dying on that aisle
of road, that that that row of

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bus seats like a fucking mile away
from a road. He was tripping a

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little bit. Yeah, was there
like a silver lining? Yeah, I

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mean you you get the d MT
hit from death and then b oh,

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dude, the ultimate release the fucking
whatever that that death. Oh, we're

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getting really close to topicle right now
in this conversation. The death trip's gonna

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be sick because it's just the afterlife. Yeah, it's just all the d

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MD in your brain gets released.
The problem is you have no concept of

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time when you dream, and that
is the after life, so can theoretically

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last forever. Yeah. The problem
is if your state of mind is shit,

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you gotta have a positive mind.
You really gotta be positively. You

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only go to hell if you're just
a pessimist. If you think you're going,

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you're going. And we've addressed this
pessimism. It's just covering up for

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a lack of intelligence. Yeah.
Basically, hey, I'm again, most

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positive dude here. He is.
He's more positive than anyone. He can

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shirt I'm wearing right now. You
know, you're just a tennis ball of

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a person today. Okay, pretty
much Yeah, it's the schizophrenia. Oh,

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that's we're leaning into that bit.
Well, I changed my looks like

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every two weeks. That's I mean, if you walk up to someone right

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now and they're like, hey,
I'm a schizophrenic, they would believe you

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because people that aren't don't say that. It's also the one disorder that nobody

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really claims yet. No one's got
that one. No one's like a bipolar

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and stuff. Yeah, I'm like
self diagnosed bipolar. I'm an autodij act.

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In psychology, there's influencers that are
like, they have tourets and they've

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convinced like a decent size of the
population that they have tourets. Yeah,

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and obviously everyone stole my valor a
long time ago. ADHD. Yeah,

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Oh, ADHD was like the nineties. Uh on the spectrum, I don't

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want to There's a big part of
me that's like, Okay, maybe you

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do have AAG and you just weren't
diagnosed as a kid or whatever. But

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look, if you didn't get told
you had ADHD when you were in grade

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school and genuinely believe you were mentally
retarded, because that's how people thought about

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ADHD back then. If you didn't
know anything about it or anything. Then

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you didn't really wouldn't know anything about
it, Rob, because they would separate

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me from my classmates and take me
to the trailer out back trailer kid reading

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comprehension. Yeah, I became a
professional writer, that's right. I had

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to. I had to take special
reading classes when I was in first grade

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because I was behind. I got
put into so this was like fourteenth grade.

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Okay, yeah, fourth what college. That's like halfway through college too.

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It's right behind the math and physics
building. Had to go to this

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like little trailer. That's great.
Yeah. I didn't have f GAT scores,

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so I went into public school.
So they thought I was stupid.

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They thought I'd just had zeros in
my standardized tests, so they put me

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into remedial. Just get that.
Just get that fucking GPA, bro.

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Standardized testing is probably the downfall of
education. All the school funding is through

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the schools is too well, well, you're talking about no Child Left Behind.

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Yeah, that's like a relatively new
well twenty years at this point.

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But it pissed It always pissed me
off because my best subject, the topic

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of this show, history never covered, not on any standardized test. You

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know why, because no one gives
a fuck if a factory worker knows about

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the Roman Empire. Dude, guess
so, man, Yeah, no,

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it's your curriculum is based around industrialization. It has been for way too long.

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But we're not talking about all that. I'm saying now that we're in

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a consumer economy, let's consider shoving
history in there, yeah for sure,

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and taking out man. Science should
not be reading or it should be content.

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It should be the content industrial complex. Yeah. Yeah, take out

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science like you don't because it's like
there's a chemistry and biology question that you

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just don't even But also, what
are you gonna do with that? What

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do you do with a photon?
What are you gonna do? We were

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moving away from the society of doctors
and electric electrical engineers and all that,

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and I just kind of lean into
it. Guys, let's just all be

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Internet creator. We are part of
that. I would probably prefer that before

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I die at some point, a
robot takes over the prostate exams I have

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to have for the rest of my
life starting in three years. Why don't

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you just shove that microphone up your
ass? Same thing. We do it

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every fucking Sunday, don't we Oh
yeah, okay, all right, So

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today I was reading kind of I
wanted to get into like mushroom trips and

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stuff like that, and I was
like, that's a little playing out.

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Started diving around into different historical topics
and one came up that I read about

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a long time ago I wanted to
get reacquainted with, and then it just

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went down a really big rabbit hole. Today we're talking about mystery cults from

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antiquity. Mystery cults are religious schools
that were primarily based on secret knowledge that

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have been around different parts of the
world for thousands and thousands of years.

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They had mystery cults in Egypt,
Greece, Rome. Some of them were

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just like sort of like inner circle
religious stuff, right. Oh no,

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these were like prominent religions in uh
like but where they're like religions within religions

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is what I mean. Yeah,
there were. We're gonna like the most

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famous one, we'll talk about a
little bit later is the Elucinian mystery school

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or mystery cult that was pretty much
the most prominent religious group from like sixteen

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hundred BC until like four hundred A
d what a run, dude, it's

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like a two thousand year run.
That doesn't get talked about a lot,

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dude, But it's actually one of
the most interesting things we'll talk about today.

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Meanwhile, we talked about is Heaven's
Gate. Those guys lasted like twenty

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years. They hadn't they still around? There's one guy he was one guy

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hung back and wrote to tell everyone
about how to tell their tale. Yeah,

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he manages like the website. They
can they interview that guy like regularly.

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What a gig? He's like,
yeah, I didn't do the thing.

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He's the spartan that left. Didn't
They all castrate themselves? A lot

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of them did a lot of them
castrated themselves. We can do it,

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you know, old fashioned. Hold
on, you know what I'm not going

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to tell you. I'll do that
episode for the Patreon in a few weeks.

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Technically, castrating yourself with a nice
knife is chemical castration. You have

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to bind those metals, fold the
steel and everything's organic. Everything's chemistry.

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If it's carbon based, it's organic, right, Ones and zeros. Really,

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hey, maybe we shouldn't get rid
of chemistry guys. But uh yeah.

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They were most known for their influence
in the Greco Roman world during the

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transition into the Christian era, and
they did last for about two thousand years

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in prominence. So the most commonly
motel now Christian or like into like,

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so the transition from pre Christian era
to Christian era, that was like the

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prominent thing. Like I said,
the Lucinian mystery school lasted from about sixteen

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hundred BC to the fourth century a
d. While the mystery cults are not

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completely understood because of their nature and
name they are centered around mystery, we

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do know a little bit about their
influence on the culture of the time,

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as well as their influence on Christianity
itself too. See. One of the

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things we've talked about a lot,
I think is pagan continuity in Christianity.

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Yeah, so you know, hey, you gotta you gotta get these people

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in. You gotta get them in
the full Germans being like, oh,

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well, we don't celebrate the solstice
with you, o Jesus, we hang

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a tree in a you a home. What if you're giving them too much

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credit? What if they're just on
original assholes the Christians? Yeah, that's

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my entire episode. So you're on
the right track. Christianity is a meme

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age. Actually, it's it's it's
Christianity is just like everything cool you've ever

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seen on Fuck Jerry someone else made. But you're like, oh man,

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I'm glad fuck Jerry poor roll together. At the end of the day,

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we're content aggregators. We're literally doing
that, rehashing stories that other people told.

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I would actually argue that what coucked
life. I watched sports all weekend,

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watch better men than me, and
then I come here and we have

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money watching better men than me.
That's how you beat the system. That's

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like, that's how you that's how
you get out of the tricks. It's

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only I'm not the red pill.
I'm not a cook. I make them

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pay pay me to fuck my wife. That's right. Wait what anyway,

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Early christian is a profit. Yeah, they that's a take home at the

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end of the day. They always
died and dash though in Courtney's like,

204
00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:50,879
don't worry about it, and I'm
like you just never you always say don't

205
00:13:50,919 --> 00:13:52,960
worry about it, and you got
to multiply your revenue streams, like you're

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00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:56,559
just a business. We'll figure it
out. We'll figure it out, you

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00:13:56,600 --> 00:14:00,360
know, we'll figure it out.
Cool, Yeah, it all out in

208
00:14:00,399 --> 00:14:05,919
the wash, you know, in
what the money? Yeah, yeah,

209
00:14:05,039 --> 00:14:09,399
but you're washing money now. Hey
man, what do you think this podcast

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00:14:09,519 --> 00:14:13,320
is? Haha? I knew you're
holding back, not holding back anything.

211
00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:16,080
We're actually way more successful than we
tell Rob. Yeah, Rob things like

212
00:14:16,080 --> 00:14:20,720
twelve people listening there and I have
a jet pack. Yeah, we share

213
00:14:20,759 --> 00:14:24,080
it. We're not that successful.
Don't get your hopes up. It's all

214
00:14:24,159 --> 00:14:28,240
fun, please please, But yeah, early Christianity was developing in a really

215
00:14:28,320 --> 00:14:33,360
vast swath of diverse religions, and
the reason for this was that people of

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00:14:33,399 --> 00:14:39,639
that period saw religion as a stabilizing
societal force. It was really important to

217
00:14:39,759 --> 00:14:43,480
them. It was also, like
Hella localized. It was super localized.

218
00:14:43,519 --> 00:14:46,679
Like it was like the same as
like religion was like cuisine. Yeah,

219
00:14:46,799 --> 00:14:50,360
it very much was. You also
have to think about what the Roman empires

220
00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:54,480
doing in this time period. They
are getting everybody. Yeah, they're going

221
00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:56,679
out and getting all the people.
Yeah. Right, so the Roman empires,

222
00:14:58,159 --> 00:15:03,480
like biggest expanse was about one hundred
years after Jesus' death. Yeah,

223
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so you see a lot of I
mean that's definitely the biggest part. But

224
00:15:07,639 --> 00:15:13,320
they're still growing. Oh and resurrection, shit, are you saying that Jesus

225
00:15:13,399 --> 00:15:24,039
Christ was preventing the Roman Empire from
colonialism. No, he wasn't anti colonial

226
00:15:24,039 --> 00:15:26,759
He actually wasn't. Even he was
like, dude, just let him give

227
00:15:26,799 --> 00:15:31,360
Caesar what he wants. It's beside
the point. Yeah. But in order

228
00:15:31,399 --> 00:15:37,519
for the Roman Empire to become this
juggernaut, Jesus had to go. Well,

229
00:15:37,679 --> 00:15:41,240
he was in opposition of some things
that I think people in the higher

230
00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:45,960
ups of Rome probably weren't so cool
with him being opposed to got to go.

231
00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:48,679
Yeah, but yeah, no,
I mean he was an imposing force

232
00:15:48,799 --> 00:15:50,759
for sure, and then the Roman
Empire was like, oh, we could

233
00:15:50,799 --> 00:15:54,200
totally parlay this. Can you imagine
what a headache if you're a Roman emperor,

234
00:15:54,279 --> 00:15:58,159
Like imagine now, like someone goes
to you know, the president,

235
00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:02,639
and they're like, sir, we
have a problem. There's this new religion.

236
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People are weird, uh, and
and it's spreading like fucking crazy.

237
00:16:07,799 --> 00:16:12,919
It started in Alabama. He's really
hurting our fishing economy. Yeah, No

238
00:16:14,039 --> 00:16:17,720
of the fishermen work anymore. They
just keep like it's he's like weird to

239
00:16:17,759 --> 00:16:19,720
start to see in the absolute butthole
of the country is where it's starting.

240
00:16:19,759 --> 00:16:25,519
No, it's the Mississippi Delta.
Yeah, and uh, everyone's converting and

241
00:16:25,759 --> 00:16:29,240
they're weird. Yeah, they're weird
as shit. Well it's only a Mississippi,

242
00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:30,960
right, No, no, no, in Alabama, it's it's kinda

243
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:34,159
Louisiana. It's actually all the way
up to Maryland. So wait what ye

244
00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:41,120
what they brought somebody back from the
dead. Weird We said about National Guard

245
00:16:41,159 --> 00:16:45,759
and we killed everyone in Mississippi.
But it just keeps spreading. Yeah,

246
00:16:45,840 --> 00:16:49,440
it's really weird. They're all nice, strange, but yeah. Religion could

247
00:16:49,440 --> 00:16:55,399
serve as a way to codify societal
norms and a constantly shifting power structure of

248
00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:57,200
like you know, these people rule
me, now these people rule me like

249
00:16:57,240 --> 00:17:00,320
so that was an easy way to, like in a local sense, just

250
00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:03,000
like hey, we're all gonna agree
to your baseline. Yeah, this is

251
00:17:03,039 --> 00:17:07,759
the thing we do. Yeah.
It was also being used to answer questions

252
00:17:07,799 --> 00:17:11,440
that all humans have had about life
and death. Of course that's not anything

253
00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:15,000
new, And it was also a
tool for how we could think in philosophical

254
00:17:15,079 --> 00:17:19,319
terms, like there's like a platonic
religion right of philosophy, and it's more

255
00:17:19,359 --> 00:17:23,079
about it's not about like you know, God and all that stuff. It's

256
00:17:23,079 --> 00:17:26,759
more about how we doesn't really deal
with the supernatural. Yeah, it's more

257
00:17:26,759 --> 00:17:30,720
of a philosophy, but also a
religion in a way too. Yeah,

258
00:17:30,839 --> 00:17:33,359
the time, while Christianity would kind
of take care of all these things with

259
00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:37,519
one doctrine and you know, get
all that shit under one umbrella. That

260
00:17:37,559 --> 00:17:41,920
took a lot of time to develop
and it was a really laborious process of

261
00:17:41,960 --> 00:17:45,799
getting all that to work right.
So today's episode, we're gonna be taking

262
00:17:45,799 --> 00:17:48,720
a look at some of the more
prominent mysteries of the mystery schools and how

263
00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:52,680
they shape the culture then as well
as now. And we're also going to

264
00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:57,880
talk about the connections and myth across
mystery schools and Christianity. Whether you find

265
00:17:57,880 --> 00:18:03,759
the comparisons like interesting or sacrilegious.
I think the Three Life well, let

266
00:18:03,759 --> 00:18:06,920
me just stop you there. Yeah, I assume it's sacrilegious. I'm sure

267
00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:10,000
it's sacrilegious. Now it's gonna infuriate
me. Yeah, no, it don't

268
00:18:10,039 --> 00:18:11,440
make me angry. I know.
I'm waiting for you to just say no,

269
00:18:11,519 --> 00:18:15,200
no, that's not right. No, actually that didn't happen. No,

270
00:18:15,839 --> 00:18:18,079
so I'm waiting for it. Well, Jake, I have a special

271
00:18:18,119 --> 00:18:22,799
guest. Actually, Jesus Christ.
It's Georgio. He's coming in to teach

272
00:18:22,799 --> 00:18:26,839
you about everything you have wrong in
your podcast. Just the one time we

273
00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:30,480
had him all that a respute an
episode and he's like, oh, can

274
00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:32,519
you remember when he did? That's
like I didn't read I didn't read that

275
00:18:32,559 --> 00:18:37,319
party. He came with more knowledge. Georgio just knew everything about resputing.

276
00:18:37,880 --> 00:18:42,240
He actually is resputing. He might
be, he could be. But yeah,

277
00:18:42,319 --> 00:18:47,079
so, like I said, you
might find the comparison sacrilegious, but

278
00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:51,279
I think the three lines in the
comparison of myth to Christian law speak to

279
00:18:51,279 --> 00:18:55,519
how Christianity is just a powerhouse when
it comes to marketing and adaptability. Like

280
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:59,119
Christianity doesn't exist because it was just
like, yep, that makes sense.

281
00:18:59,599 --> 00:19:03,440
What do you think built the Vatican
hugs No, it's the most adaptable religion

282
00:19:03,480 --> 00:19:06,279
of all time. They're like,
no, whatever works, get in,

283
00:19:06,799 --> 00:19:08,400
get in the car, bring it
in. Yeah, you know, the

284
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:17,400
Pope went around and he's like silver
lad, Yeah, he's the Pope was

285
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:22,039
really like Pablo for a while.
No one knows that there's kind of like

286
00:19:22,079 --> 00:19:26,480
a new funny rift. I don't
think it will ever happen, but I

287
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:30,680
read something the other day that like
American bishops in particular have become kind of

288
00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:34,359
like some of the more conservative in
the Catholic Francis just had to get rid

289
00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:40,039
of a guy really in the States, not for diddling, not for diddling.

290
00:19:40,119 --> 00:19:42,680
I think he was just going against
the being a dick hole. Yeah,

291
00:19:42,960 --> 00:19:47,759
asshole. Yeah, because Francis will
be Pope France will say sha,

292
00:19:47,920 --> 00:19:52,799
like transgender people go the hell,
but we should be nice to them.

293
00:19:55,359 --> 00:20:00,079
That's up bishops like no, no, imagine that though, right, what

294
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:03,960
a take that would infuriate almost everyone
else, but like that's pretty good for

295
00:20:04,039 --> 00:20:10,119
Catholicism. Of like, hey,
you gotta be googe. You're working at

296
00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:14,480
like a home depot and you're in
I don't know, like the paint department,

297
00:20:15,119 --> 00:20:21,640
and all of a sudden, the
CEO of home depot fires you because

298
00:20:21,759 --> 00:20:25,319
it was like listen, you little
fucking shit, just because they don't know

299
00:20:25,359 --> 00:20:30,720
the difference between Bear and Sherwan Williams
and they're confused about it. That's notes.

300
00:20:30,799 --> 00:20:33,000
I mean, you can yell at
them in the store and you have

301
00:20:33,160 --> 00:20:36,759
that in your back pocket, that
card I got fired by the Pope.

302
00:20:37,559 --> 00:20:41,119
Yeah, it's like that one girl
that was a TFM girl back in the

303
00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:45,039
day. I believe the Pope's account
liked her photo. She's a thoughtie and

304
00:20:45,319 --> 00:20:51,160
at Pontifix, Yeah, she gotta
like from aix from Francis. That's the

305
00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:53,920
Pope. That's the papal account at
It's like at Potus, that's just in

306
00:20:55,039 --> 00:20:59,920
her bio. Now it's just the
Pope's favorite. That's that's I would take

307
00:21:00,079 --> 00:21:03,480
that glorious look. Man, when
you're a bouncer at an argenty nightclub,

308
00:21:03,599 --> 00:21:07,079
you're gonna like thoughts. This just
happens Argent a nightclub in Buenos Aires.

309
00:21:07,119 --> 00:21:11,200
Yeah, and this girl was right
up his alley. This is the first

310
00:21:11,279 --> 00:21:15,599
pope we've had that. It hasn't
been a virgin from women in a long

311
00:21:15,720 --> 00:21:21,839
time, at least eighty year.
Even them were virgins. I think there

312
00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:26,839
was probably a run. You think
Benedict, Yeah, hondo p not to

313
00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:30,839
youth. I also think Pope John
Paul probably was too. Yeah, could

314
00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:36,400
he could get it? And John
Paul smoked some dude he got smoked.

315
00:21:36,759 --> 00:21:38,200
Yeah, but then he finished it
off. It's tree. He's like,

316
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:41,039
you didn't get me. He turned
the other cheek and then pulled the trigger.

317
00:21:41,079 --> 00:21:45,839
Pulled the trigger yeah, so yeah, back to the episode though,

318
00:21:45,839 --> 00:21:48,920
a stroke for stroke. I don't
think Christianity was even that radical for the

319
00:21:48,960 --> 00:21:53,599
time when you start comparing theologies here. But it was just really fucking good

320
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:57,640
at assimilation on both sides of the
street. Well, I don't think anyone

321
00:21:57,640 --> 00:22:00,599
else was really trying to assimilate.
No, that's the thing it was.

322
00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:04,759
Everything is based on secrecy for the
most part. We're gonna talk about it

323
00:22:04,759 --> 00:22:07,920
well. And also again it was
like localized. It's like, yeah,

324
00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:10,640
you know, I'm a Roman,
so I worship Jupiter, which I was

325
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:12,599
sold from the Greece. I'm a
Greek I worship or whatever. But then

326
00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:18,440
it's like, oh, but you're
you are you know, uh, I

327
00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:21,119
can't even think of that. You're
a Carthaginian. So you worship whoever you

328
00:22:21,160 --> 00:22:22,039
worship, you know what I mean. Like, and that's just how it

329
00:22:22,079 --> 00:22:27,039
is, like you worship. It
is honestly very similar like Jews being ethnic

330
00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:33,640
and a religion like that's kind of
how everyone was. Like every religion was

331
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:36,920
tied to like a region or an
ethnicity. There was no there was no

332
00:22:37,079 --> 00:22:40,920
goal to convert. That is a
Christian and Muslim thing. For the most

333
00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:44,000
part, I think maybe Buddhists were
doing that too. I don't know.

334
00:22:44,079 --> 00:22:47,240
I think Catholics are in some way, especially in the Northeast. That's a

335
00:22:47,279 --> 00:22:51,200
culture. Oh yeah, well no, now Catholic is yeah, Irish Catholic,

336
00:22:51,599 --> 00:22:57,039
Italian Catholic from but yeah. Much
like Roman monoculture was the result of

337
00:22:57,160 --> 00:23:03,599
Rome assimilating cultural aspect from lance conquered
to its own culture in order to assimilate

338
00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:07,720
newly conquered people, It's not surprising
that a religious movement birth in that same

339
00:23:07,799 --> 00:23:11,680
environment would be so adaptable in order
to accommodate its own growth and evangelist stage

340
00:23:11,799 --> 00:23:15,920
evangelization. God, that word,
why'd you write that? I don't know

341
00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:19,519
I wrote it. Actually, when
I was writing that, I was like,

342
00:23:19,599 --> 00:23:22,240
you wanted to sound what what do
you want to say in spreading it,

343
00:23:22,319 --> 00:23:26,960
spreading it, spreading it up,
talk out? They spread it good

344
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:29,799
and yeah, yeah, but you
know, like Robers just say a horrible

345
00:23:29,839 --> 00:23:30,759
note to get from a teacher.
Hey, you write like you talk.

346
00:23:32,319 --> 00:23:37,279
Don't don't do that. Don't talk
dumb, you talk like an idiot preaching

347
00:23:37,359 --> 00:23:44,799
in the choir. My man a
man like Rough said. Romans were being

348
00:23:44,839 --> 00:23:48,759
influenced by the Greeks and the Egyptians
and the Persians pretty much all the time.

349
00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:51,279
The most important thing to remember about
all of this, like I said

350
00:23:51,279 --> 00:23:55,480
earlier, though, is that religion
was all over the damn place during humanity's

351
00:23:55,519 --> 00:23:59,559
turn into this Christian era, and
people were pining for it. They wanted

352
00:23:59,559 --> 00:24:03,839
it like they wanted it again,
not just for like societal norms. But

353
00:24:03,839 --> 00:24:07,880
everyone's like, man, I'm gonna
die, and what's the deal with that?

354
00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:11,920
What's going on? Uh? And
there's a lot of religions that early

355
00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:15,160
didn't sell themselves well. They're like, you have to be this because you

356
00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:18,880
live here, and yes, there
is an afterlife, but it's only hell.

357
00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:23,039
Yeah, pretty much the mystery enjoy
your this nightmare on earth. It

358
00:24:23,160 --> 00:24:27,119
only gets worse after it's much worse. This is the best part. Yeah,

359
00:24:27,319 --> 00:24:30,799
No, the mysteries actually did a
good job of quelling people's fears about

360
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,559
dying. And we'll get to that
soon. But yeah, the thing that

361
00:24:33,559 --> 00:24:37,079
I found most of the like,
but make shit, but don't kill yourself.

362
00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:41,079
Don't do it. I think that's
in that's a joke in the invention

363
00:24:41,119 --> 00:24:48,279
of lying. That movie kind of
sucks, but kind of. I never

364
00:24:48,319 --> 00:24:52,240
saw it, but I read the
script when you're younger and you watch it

365
00:24:52,240 --> 00:24:56,160
for the first time. I'm sure
it held up it when we were in

366
00:24:56,359 --> 00:25:00,599
college, when you're first testing this
like thought in your head, it's like

367
00:25:00,839 --> 00:25:06,720
it's like low tier satire. Yeah, pretty much. But yeah. I

368
00:25:06,759 --> 00:25:08,440
think the most interesting thing though,
too, is because there's so much widespread

369
00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:14,440
religion, there's multiple religions that people
have at the same time. So mystery

370
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:18,960
religions were just one type of three
types of Hellenistic religion in the era,

371
00:25:18,599 --> 00:25:23,160
the others being there was an imperial
cult of course. Yeah, You've been

372
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:29,160
doing a lot of these kind of
you know, off the beaten trail religions

373
00:25:29,200 --> 00:25:33,799
recently, and I just need,
like I'm wondering everything good at home?

374
00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:37,839
Are you just kind of like in
the midst of a midlife crisis you don't

375
00:25:37,880 --> 00:25:41,680
really know your purpose? Like are
you do you know what I'm trying to

376
00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:48,559
do, like in the future,
have your own cult? Yeah, dog,

377
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:52,359
okay, just homework, but you
don't have the confidence for that.

378
00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:55,559
Oh do you think I'm Do you
think I'm the mouthpiece of the cult?

379
00:25:55,680 --> 00:25:59,799
Are you kidding? You're the puppet
masters? Back bro? You don't want

380
00:26:00,279 --> 00:26:03,839
you don't want to be the David
koresh Okay, I always forget you weren't

381
00:26:03,839 --> 00:26:07,720
at his wedding, but at the
ceremony he's been doing this sort of black

382
00:26:07,759 --> 00:26:14,240
magic for a while. That he
him and Katie join hands slit Wheeler's throat,

383
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:18,319
and then they had just dragged the
dog away and they sort of like,

384
00:26:18,599 --> 00:26:22,119
you know, did it in their
blood, like you know, like

385
00:26:22,759 --> 00:26:26,279
want made the bond and the blood. And then we get to the reception

386
00:26:26,039 --> 00:26:30,799
and Wheelers just running around. It
works that dog was dead. They made

387
00:26:30,839 --> 00:26:34,720
everyone in the wedding party put a
finger in the in the neck. There

388
00:26:34,799 --> 00:26:40,319
was a dead dog. And then
guess what, Then a dove popped out.

389
00:26:40,680 --> 00:26:42,839
Then he was alive. All I'm
saying is I didn't ask questions,

390
00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:47,559
and I was pretty drunk, nor
should you just tell the tale? I

391
00:26:47,599 --> 00:26:49,839
was just like this, this is
Florida, forget it. Jake's a magician.

392
00:26:52,440 --> 00:26:56,119
What is a prophet to a magician? You know? Anyway? Uh

393
00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:59,599
So, Yeah, during this time, a person could easily observe the rights

394
00:26:59,599 --> 00:27:03,079
of the state religion. They could
be an initiate and one or more mysteries.

395
00:27:03,119 --> 00:27:06,160
You could be an initiated into multiple
mystery schools as well, and at

396
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:10,599
the same time adhere to certain philosophical
schools or your ethnic religion as well.

397
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:14,920
I mean that kind of exists in
like Catholicism today and in other religions too,

398
00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:18,359
Like there's sex within and I'm not
talking about like Methodist, Baptist whatever,

399
00:27:18,799 --> 00:27:22,799
like within Catholicism, Like we don't
acknowledge those anyway. No, they're

400
00:27:22,039 --> 00:27:26,039
protates are worthless. You wear genes
to fucking church. Yeah. I actually

401
00:27:26,279 --> 00:27:29,599
my wife always gets to rry me
when I say that. And they were

402
00:27:30,960 --> 00:27:33,480
told I told my wife about Saint
Blaize last night because her mom was here

403
00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:37,000
and they were talking about Catholicism and
I was explaining the Hail Mary to them.

404
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:38,680
She didn't even know what a Hail
Mary was. It's like, you

405
00:27:38,720 --> 00:27:41,920
didn't know you're hail Mary. Yeah. I was like, hey, she's

406
00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:45,119
like, you pray to Mary's it
gives me pray to marry. So anyway,

407
00:27:45,319 --> 00:27:48,680
she's the main Eventually, I was
just like, I was like,

408
00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:52,119
well, maybe she's like I just
don't understand it. And I was like,

409
00:27:52,119 --> 00:27:53,440
well, maybe you'd be more into
it if the priests put on a

410
00:27:53,480 --> 00:28:00,000
denim frock. We also just have
the best architecture, like Gothic churches.

411
00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:03,640
This is the this is the peaked. I can't walk into a strip mall

412
00:28:03,680 --> 00:28:07,240
and think God's there. I can't. I need a gods not next to

413
00:28:07,319 --> 00:28:14,839
t J Max. You know that
is rock hard that I think can come

414
00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:18,039
to life at any moment like a
terrify O. And then like Michael with

415
00:28:18,079 --> 00:28:21,720
the sword, like at it.
That's religion, baby, that is it's

416
00:28:21,799 --> 00:28:26,759
it's fear, it's the slight maybe
yeah of oh no way. I like

417
00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:32,480
uh, Jewish and Islamic architecture too. I'm a big fan of religious architecture.

418
00:28:32,599 --> 00:28:40,200
Yeah, but a Methodism, baptisms
and that giant fucking yeah dome.

419
00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:44,799
Yeah it sick cube you walk around. Hell yeah, I would do anything

420
00:28:44,880 --> 00:28:48,079
to go inside that cube. Oh
dude, there's an Islam there's a meteorite

421
00:28:48,079 --> 00:28:52,519
in there. I'll do that in
prison. Yeah. Well. There are

422
00:28:52,640 --> 00:28:56,960
actually a ton of different mystery religions. They very wildly in tradition and ritual

423
00:28:57,039 --> 00:29:00,359
from mystery to mystery, but they
all have the following four things in common.

424
00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:07,000
So one all held that initiates shared
in symbolic fashion, the experience of

425
00:29:07,119 --> 00:29:12,200
the God. What that means,
more or less is there is a certain

426
00:29:12,279 --> 00:29:18,119
level of divinity to you and you
are learning about. Typically, these these

427
00:29:18,359 --> 00:29:22,319
mystery schools, there is a myth
at the center of their teachings and you

428
00:29:22,359 --> 00:29:30,079
would be kind of demonstrated through ritual
what that myth was really about. What

429
00:29:30,119 --> 00:29:33,079
I think is really fascinating as we
go forward to is these mystery school rights

430
00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:38,279
and rituals and things like that are
one thousand percent the basis for every Greek

431
00:29:38,400 --> 00:29:42,000
letter organ I was about to say
this sounds like my first pledge pledge ed

432
00:29:42,039 --> 00:29:45,400
mating. Yep, it is.
It is one thousand percent. How'd you

433
00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:51,880
guys react when you saw the robes
for the first time? Oh, like

434
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:55,119
when you you're going rich robes.
Yeah, I was like, fucking hey,

435
00:29:55,119 --> 00:29:56,640
I'm almost done. I know how
long it was gonna be. But

436
00:29:56,680 --> 00:30:00,160
I was like, I know the
robes that color with a row. We

437
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:03,400
had different colors. We had like
black, purple, and yellow, I

438
00:30:03,440 --> 00:30:06,839
think depending on what we had purple, I think we had read and then

439
00:30:06,880 --> 00:30:11,160
we had one white. Oh really
that was the first person you see?

440
00:30:11,720 --> 00:30:17,039
Oh so not a great impression.
Not a great firstpression. Probably not.

441
00:30:17,680 --> 00:30:21,519
Uh it's a guy to white hood. No, not your favorite site.

442
00:30:22,079 --> 00:30:25,720
No, weird? What did I
join, but yeah, number two all

443
00:30:25,759 --> 00:30:30,599
had secret rights for the initiated.
Three, all offered some sort of mystical

444
00:30:30,759 --> 00:30:36,119
cleansing from sin or rebirth from a
prior state, and for all promised a

445
00:30:36,119 --> 00:30:40,359
happy future life for the faithful that
we're initiated into. It is frats.

446
00:30:40,640 --> 00:30:45,039
It's frats. It's frats. But
like, there's a time with mushrooms,

447
00:30:45,079 --> 00:30:48,000
right, Oh, we'll get there. Okay, we'll get there. It

448
00:30:48,039 --> 00:30:49,839
makes more sense though, when you
are on mushrooms because you think you are

449
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:53,039
God. Yeah. Yeah, Now
when we get to the mushroom talk,

450
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:57,160
you know, we don't know.
I don't fully understand how you can have

451
00:30:57,160 --> 00:31:03,079
a negative reaction or experience on mushrooms, a bad trip, Like your ego

452
00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:07,799
is so inflated. What if you
just hate yourself? I guess yeah I

453
00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:11,039
do. But I'm still I think. I think the people that have a

454
00:31:11,079 --> 00:31:14,880
bad trip are integrating things that they
aren't happy about, and that takes a

455
00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:17,640
lot of personal work. Dog.
Yeah, do you know how much is

456
00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:18,960
wrong in my life right now?
Yeah? But I mean, like I

457
00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:23,680
still think I am the creator when
I'm on mushrooms. I don't know if

458
00:31:23,680 --> 00:31:27,039
you're using them right or you're using
them exactly right. What are the other

459
00:31:27,279 --> 00:31:32,400
Yeah, the people always talk about
ego death, no ego growth. Yeah,

460
00:31:32,680 --> 00:31:36,839
Dan's egos so big now. But
yeah, there's also a very clear

461
00:31:36,880 --> 00:31:38,759
theme that will be in apparent a
lot of these mystery cult teachings. See

462
00:31:38,799 --> 00:31:42,279
if you can spot it as they
go through them. But I just want

463
00:31:42,319 --> 00:31:45,599
to make a real quick note too. When I was doing this research,

464
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:49,279
I found a paper that was written
at Stanford that kind of kind of went

465
00:31:49,319 --> 00:31:52,680
deep in all of these and how
they influenced Christianity. It's like, oh,

466
00:31:52,759 --> 00:31:56,240
man, this is like Room is
written in nineteen between nineteen forty nine

467
00:31:56,240 --> 00:32:00,279
and nineteen fifty. I trust that
then and like modern day Stanford. I

468
00:32:00,319 --> 00:32:01,960
was like, man, these guys
like a really good writer. This kid

469
00:32:02,119 --> 00:32:06,519
like I didn't realize what the paper
was from, and so I scrolled back

470
00:32:06,559 --> 00:32:08,400
up to the top. It was
Martin Luther King Junior that wrote it.

471
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:13,920
Oh, so he has like an
entire like thesis on these mystery schools and

472
00:32:14,119 --> 00:32:19,000
Stanford. No, he wrote this
after graduating from Howard in his time at

473
00:32:19,079 --> 00:32:22,960
Seminary School and the University of Pennsylvania. But the King Institute is at Stanford.

474
00:32:23,160 --> 00:32:25,799
I was gonna say, would they
let him in Stanford in the forties

475
00:32:27,119 --> 00:32:30,519
if anywhere? Yeah, Jackie Robinson
was playing at ECLA in the forties.

476
00:32:30,839 --> 00:32:37,799
Yeah, but I mean MLK isn't
hitting dangers well and he Jackie was a

477
00:32:37,799 --> 00:32:42,119
two sport athlete. There's video of
Jackie playing in the Rose Bowl. That's

478
00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:45,839
crazy. I love that for him. But yeah. The first mystery school

479
00:32:45,839 --> 00:32:49,279
we're gonna get to is the cult
of Sibley and Attis. I'm sure all

480
00:32:49,440 --> 00:32:52,279
MLK had to do was throw a
ball over forty yards and they're like,

481
00:32:52,279 --> 00:32:57,920
all right, you can come in. Holy shit, they barely want a

482
00:32:57,920 --> 00:33:02,200
black guy to play quarterback. Now, who said anything about quarterback? Where's

483
00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:05,839
he still talking about baseball? Oh? I think well he said forty yards.

484
00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:10,960
Yeah, that's how little I think
of the athlete. Uh yeah,

485
00:33:12,160 --> 00:33:15,400
So we'll keep going. The cult
of sibyly and Addis, it's a cult

486
00:33:15,400 --> 00:33:21,079
centered around a myth. The cult
of Sibylian Addis could have easily influenced the

487
00:33:21,079 --> 00:33:24,160
thought of early Christians. We can
trace its origins till likely around the sixth

488
00:33:24,160 --> 00:33:30,640
century BC UH and having a pretty
prominent influence on religion in general into the

489
00:33:30,680 --> 00:33:35,119
second century AD. The Mystery religion
is anchored around the myth of Addis and

490
00:33:35,119 --> 00:33:38,640
Sibley. Addis was a shepherd,
the son of Sibylly, who is considered

491
00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:43,519
the Great Mother, who gave birth
to him without union with mortal man.

492
00:33:44,599 --> 00:33:47,119
Virgin birth to a shepherd, a
shepherd born of virgin birth. Okay,

493
00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:50,039
we I mean Jesus wasn't a shepherd, but yeah, virginal, but are

494
00:33:50,079 --> 00:33:52,920
still a shepherd for origin? Birth
is just like such a layup, low

495
00:33:53,160 --> 00:34:00,240
effort miracle. Oh baby, no
even fucked her. Yeah we are all

496
00:34:00,279 --> 00:34:05,119
people were using that excuse throughout time. Yeah yeah, so it's like,

497
00:34:05,119 --> 00:34:09,480
oh yeah, town had its eighth
miracle this month, another pregnant Jack and

498
00:34:09,559 --> 00:34:13,599
no one fucked He's crazy man Saturday. Now, yeah, we get all

499
00:34:13,599 --> 00:34:16,920
these miracles babies every time. But
yeah. According to the myth, Addis

500
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:22,360
died either he was slain by another
man or he killed himself, and at

501
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:28,440
the death of Addis, Sibilly mourned
until he rose to life again in the

502
00:34:28,480 --> 00:34:32,360
springtime. The central theme of the
myth was the triumph of Addis over death,

503
00:34:32,840 --> 00:34:37,559
and the participant in the rights of
the cult undoubtedly believed that his attachment

504
00:34:37,639 --> 00:34:42,599
to the victorious deity would ensure a
similar triumph in his life over obstacles and

505
00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:45,239
ultimately the fear of death. So
a lot of these are going to be

506
00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:50,320
centered around getting over the fear of
death too, in order to live a

507
00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:52,519
better life, because death is inevitable. I like to like, so,

508
00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:58,079
oh, you're about your cult about
a guy who beat death, So that

509
00:34:58,199 --> 00:34:59,719
if I'm in it and I'm gonna
beat death, is like, no,

510
00:35:00,079 --> 00:35:02,920
we'll care about it anymore. Oh, you'll beat it, but we'll get

511
00:35:02,920 --> 00:35:08,880
more into that nag death, the
Elucinian mystery, will get way more into

512
00:35:08,960 --> 00:35:13,719
why it's like that all right?
If it's offered, would you upload your

513
00:35:13,719 --> 00:35:20,079
consciousness? No? Zero percent chance. Uh, it would just depend on

514
00:35:20,119 --> 00:35:22,679
what was going on in my life. Yeah, if I was like really

515
00:35:22,679 --> 00:35:25,480
sad, maybe it depends. You
know, how successful your kids are.

516
00:35:27,239 --> 00:35:30,519
Yeah, Like, if they're giant
pieces of shit, just kill me.

517
00:35:31,199 --> 00:35:35,039
But if they succeed, if they
actually, you know, overcome all the

518
00:35:35,079 --> 00:35:37,880
obstacles, all these things that are
set in front of them because you're their

519
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:44,400
dad and they somehow become successful,
I think you should. No, I

520
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:46,000
would upload, I would see what
I would see. It's up. I

521
00:35:46,599 --> 00:35:50,480
just don't know if you it's really
you, like you're not experiencing, well,

522
00:35:50,480 --> 00:35:52,679
then you're deadway, I wouldn't do
it like right now, I wouldn't

523
00:35:52,679 --> 00:35:57,760
do it tomorrow. Yeah, but
like terminal cancer dying seventies. Yeah,

524
00:35:57,800 --> 00:36:00,960
there's gonna be a thing though whenever
that that I think that is inevitable,

525
00:36:00,119 --> 00:36:06,440
that concept. But it's gonna become
selfish of you to not do it if

526
00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:07,320
you like, they're gonna be like
what do you mean, like you know

527
00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:09,480
how, it's gonna be like why
do you want to drive down car?

528
00:36:09,519 --> 00:36:14,360
Dad was such a psycho, like
he fucking just died. He just died

529
00:36:14,400 --> 00:36:17,360
and didn't like leave any fragment of
himself behin and for kids to interact with

530
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:21,239
at least leave like one of those
Harry Potter paintings where if you die,

531
00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:24,480
you just like fucking hang out there. And they'll definitely do it in a

532
00:36:24,519 --> 00:36:31,920
way that it's just not for any
like uh reason to have you around.

533
00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:37,000
It's more just for convenience, like
oh shit, Dad knew about this.

534
00:36:37,719 --> 00:36:43,440
Conscious you're the Internet for your like
your family history. Now yeah, well

535
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:45,760
yeah, Uncle Greg was kind of
racist. I mean I think that that's

536
00:36:45,760 --> 00:36:49,719
what we thought. But at that
point, what you're in the middle of,

537
00:36:49,760 --> 00:36:52,960
Like you've been you're now alive for
like one hundred and you're like one

538
00:36:53,039 --> 00:36:57,119
hundred and sixty hundred and seventy years
old. You've been in the simulation almost

539
00:36:57,159 --> 00:37:00,039
as long as you've been alive,
and god knows how time moves or whatever

540
00:37:00,079 --> 00:37:02,599
in the simulation. So they just
like call you but you're in the middle

541
00:37:02,639 --> 00:37:07,440
of a digital pan sexual orgy because
nothing matters anymore. Yeah, just constant.

542
00:37:07,719 --> 00:37:13,039
You're just putting your fucking doug.
You're in a storage innit. Yeah,

543
00:37:13,119 --> 00:37:15,639
and then just rip you out of
it, Like, yeah, I

544
00:37:15,639 --> 00:37:19,639
thought you were thinking it was saying
it was like what was that upload,

545
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:23,559
black mirror upload or Ogah. Originally
that's what I thought, but then I'm

546
00:37:23,599 --> 00:37:27,840
like, no, this at the
end of the day would eventually just be

547
00:37:29,679 --> 00:37:32,519
for a convenience of others, the
poor people and upload Oh yeah, where

548
00:37:32,559 --> 00:37:37,039
they get frozen. Yeah, out
of minutes for this month. Yeah that's

549
00:37:37,039 --> 00:37:40,760
a nightmare. But back to sybil
Y. Yeah, So this was such

550
00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:45,199
a prominent story and myth that in
Rome there was a festival actually every year

551
00:37:45,239 --> 00:37:50,519
celebrating the death and resurrection of Attis. The celebration was held annually from March

552
00:37:50,559 --> 00:37:52,760
twenty second to twenty fifth. Is
that what the sex thing is named after?

553
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:58,519
A sibylists, I don't know.
Actually, what do you mean the

554
00:37:58,559 --> 00:38:01,360
little thing you ride? Oh,
Sybyan Sibyan, Sorry Sibby, I don't.

555
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:05,119
I don't think it's spelled the same, Okay, yeah, damn.

556
00:38:05,199 --> 00:38:07,199
On the first day of the festival, an effigy of Addis is fastened to

557
00:38:07,239 --> 00:38:10,639
the trunk of a pine tree to
signify him being slanged and hang on a

558
00:38:10,679 --> 00:38:14,800
tree. Don't act all coy.
You know what a Sybyan is? Uh?

559
00:38:14,880 --> 00:38:19,039
You knew the name? I fuck
up the name? I don't.

560
00:38:19,159 --> 00:38:21,800
I do know what it is?
The little like hump thing you sit on,

561
00:38:22,280 --> 00:38:25,320
the little half Uh? Yeah,
you're familiar with its work? Yeah?

562
00:38:25,360 --> 00:38:29,800
If not? You know I saw
burn after reading all right, that's

563
00:38:29,800 --> 00:38:31,840
why you know it? That's why? Or Howard Stern or we have to

564
00:38:31,840 --> 00:38:37,079
do Adam and Eve fucking ads on
the main show now here though they don't

565
00:38:37,079 --> 00:38:39,000
play that's two three. Yeah,
not on our show. But yeah.

566
00:38:39,039 --> 00:38:44,039
So. This effigy was later buried
in a tomb a couple of days later,

567
00:38:44,159 --> 00:38:45,440
two days later to be exact on
March twenty fourth, known as the

568
00:38:45,519 --> 00:38:50,639
Day of Blood, the high priest
of the town would impersonate Adis. He

569
00:38:50,639 --> 00:38:52,320
would draw a blood from his arm
and offer it up in place of the

570
00:38:52,360 --> 00:39:00,800
blood of a human sacrifice, sacrificing
himself at the sword of well. Okay,

571
00:39:00,239 --> 00:39:07,239
donating blood it's symbolic to the ground
of Addis's sacrifice for man. That

572
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:08,800
night, the priest would go back
to the tomb and proclaim it empty.

573
00:39:09,039 --> 00:39:13,320
The God having risen on the third
day from the dead, and on the

574
00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:16,159
twenty fifth, the resurrection was celebrated
with great rejoicing. During this great celebration,

575
00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:20,719
a sacramental meal of some kind was
taken, and initiates were baptized with

576
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:23,639
blood, whereby their sins were washed
away time they were said to be born

577
00:39:23,719 --> 00:39:27,880
again. Baptized with water. No
thank you, but yeah, blood,

578
00:39:27,920 --> 00:39:30,960
that's that's so HARDCOURTI it's pretty cool. Yeah it was. I always go

579
00:39:30,079 --> 00:39:32,320
up when I was a kid.
I would go up to communion and be

580
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:37,920
like, drink it, oh,
drink, and like this is wine.

581
00:39:39,519 --> 00:39:44,400
Oh no alcohol. Do you know
what it's like when you're given wine and

582
00:39:44,400 --> 00:39:47,440
you're told it's blood. I wantn't
blood, bitch, It's just here respondible

583
00:39:47,480 --> 00:39:52,119
to give me alcohol. Uh but
yeah. In Gaul, Italy and other

584
00:39:52,119 --> 00:39:55,039
countries where Atis worship was really powerful, the early Christians adapted the actual date

585
00:39:55,039 --> 00:40:00,360
March twenty fifth, as the anniversary
of the Lord's passion. We have a

586
00:40:00,400 --> 00:40:04,199
springtime that's Easter. Yep, it's
very much in line with like the early

587
00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:07,800
celebration of Easter. Yeah, the
Addis resurrection things. So also springs just

588
00:40:07,840 --> 00:40:12,639
crucifying season. Everybody knows that.
Yeah, you got out good lumber,

589
00:40:13,039 --> 00:40:15,360
you know, not too hot,
you can throw that cross up. Really,

590
00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:21,039
the nailors and the lifters, it's
you know, everyone's re energized.

591
00:40:21,079 --> 00:40:23,199
Yeah, July and Jerusalem is just
it's not the time. Great, it's

592
00:40:23,239 --> 00:40:27,920
great for the hanging of them because
you know, fuck fuck the criminals.

593
00:40:28,079 --> 00:40:30,159
Yeah, but you just got through
a brutal winner. Yeah. Spring and

594
00:40:30,159 --> 00:40:35,000
sprung. Yeah it's nice weather,
chopping down a tree, you getting to

595
00:40:35,039 --> 00:40:38,719
tailgate a couple. Yeah, but
yeah. The merging of the worship of

596
00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:43,320
Addis into that of Jesus was pretty
much combined without interruption. They were like,

597
00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:45,199
no, we're doing this one.
Oh, what a coincidence, that's

598
00:40:45,239 --> 00:40:51,039
our guy. Yeah. But of
note, the original ceremonies of the Attis

599
00:40:51,119 --> 00:40:55,639
Resurrection were enacted in a sanctuary on
the Vatican Hill, which the Christians would

600
00:40:55,639 --> 00:41:00,760
take over eventually. And you know
what they built there, I forget,

601
00:41:00,880 --> 00:41:04,880
Saint Peter's Basilica is built on the
Vatican on that rock. So the very

602
00:41:04,960 --> 00:41:09,039
place where they co opted this ritual
they built. I figured the Vatican was

603
00:41:09,039 --> 00:41:12,360
built on the Vatican Hill. Yeah, it's a good guess. Yeah,

604
00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:15,920
yeah, but specifically Saint Peter's Basilica. Super unstable foundation though, putting it

605
00:41:15,960 --> 00:41:21,599
on a rock. Mm hmmm,
it's fine, it'll be there for a

606
00:41:21,639 --> 00:41:25,280
while. I think, you know, I just think it's an oversized boulder

607
00:41:27,239 --> 00:41:30,320
that they just try to balance on. It's like a it's like a rock,

608
00:41:30,440 --> 00:41:34,280
Karen, like the stacking stones you
see on trails. There's just a

609
00:41:34,480 --> 00:41:37,280
you know, beautiful basilica on top
of it. No, it's an Easter

610
00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:42,480
Island statue. It's just ahead,
it's on one point, rolling around.

611
00:41:42,519 --> 00:41:45,320
Okay. But yeah, so,
uh, Doctor King. At the time,

612
00:41:45,880 --> 00:41:51,440
I believe that, you know,
that was very obviously the pine tree

613
00:41:51,840 --> 00:41:55,440
that they would put the figeon was
very similar to the cross process. And

614
00:41:55,519 --> 00:41:59,159
you know the tomb. I think
we all see the similarities there. The

615
00:41:59,199 --> 00:42:02,039
next group of the three coincidences.
Yeah, uh, this was happening way

616
00:42:02,079 --> 00:42:06,880
before the Christian Yeah, I'd be
kind of pissed off. If I was

617
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:12,159
nailed to a pine tree, I
would not see this is no, you

618
00:42:12,199 --> 00:42:15,880
didn't even make it into a shape
like I'm not christ Like, I'm just

619
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:20,559
dying on a tree. The Lucinian
mysteries, the ones I was referring to

620
00:42:20,599 --> 00:42:22,239
earlier, This is the one I'm
gonna dive really deep on. It's one

621
00:42:22,239 --> 00:42:25,159
of the more fascinating things that we
don't know a lot about, but no

622
00:42:25,400 --> 00:42:30,199
enough to make it even more fascinating, especially considering it's a run of two

623
00:42:30,199 --> 00:42:34,440
thousand years of revalence. Yeah,
in the Greco romanet era, But the

624
00:42:34,480 --> 00:42:37,679
basis for the mysteries can be found
in the myth of the kidnapping of Persephone.

625
00:42:38,840 --> 00:42:42,800
She of course was the daughter of
Demeter, the goddess of agricultural Of

626
00:42:42,840 --> 00:42:45,840
course, of course everyone knows this. Uh, and Persephone. I don't

627
00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:47,000
even know why I need to say
it. Yeah, yeah, you added

628
00:42:47,440 --> 00:42:51,480
unnecessary. If this is a script
and I was making edits, i'd be

629
00:42:51,519 --> 00:42:52,880
like cut. Obviously, that's recondent. We all know who po Stephanie is.

630
00:42:53,079 --> 00:42:58,159
Do you we all know who she
was kidnapped by? No, I'm

631
00:42:58,159 --> 00:43:00,920
just lying. I don't know anything
about seven. Oh you don't. This

632
00:43:00,000 --> 00:43:04,719
is like the classic uh oh,
this is the classic Greek myth of the

633
00:43:04,760 --> 00:43:07,960
seasons. So, uh yeah,
Persephone's captured by Hades, the god of

634
00:43:07,960 --> 00:43:13,159
the underworld. If you don't remember
the story, which I guess you don't,

635
00:43:13,519 --> 00:43:16,760
to meet her cost famine and drought
across Greece, killing many and depriving

636
00:43:16,800 --> 00:43:21,079
gods of proper sacrifice and worship.
Oh, it's the gods who are really

637
00:43:21,119 --> 00:43:23,840
hurt. And yeah, once the
big guys started hurting, you know,

638
00:43:23,880 --> 00:43:28,440
they're like, hey, Zeus,
yeah, Zeus, can you make Hades

639
00:43:28,440 --> 00:43:30,679
give Persephone back? Let's a trickle
up famine, I believe. Yeah,

640
00:43:30,760 --> 00:43:35,800
it was very trickle up. I
didn't get a single goddamn lamb slaughtered in

641
00:43:35,880 --> 00:43:38,800
my name? Can you can you
chill about your daughter being in the underworld,

642
00:43:38,920 --> 00:43:44,679
lady? So that was actually kind
of the plot. Did you guys

643
00:43:44,679 --> 00:43:50,199
ever read the original script to Gladiator
too? Oh? Again, No,

644
00:43:50,440 --> 00:43:53,400
I don't even really know how they're
gonna make Gladiator two. Yeah, Well,

645
00:43:53,440 --> 00:43:58,000
so the original script for Gladiator two
featured Maximus. He had to go

646
00:43:58,119 --> 00:44:00,440
back to Earth. Yeah, he
was in the he was dead and in

647
00:44:00,480 --> 00:44:05,840
the end of the world and the
Christianity was like booming. That's pretty sick.

648
00:44:06,039 --> 00:44:07,679
And the old is he there with
the son though, because remember his

649
00:44:07,760 --> 00:44:15,920
son got he does his son to
Chris, his son or something some family

650
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:19,199
member is a character that he has
to go back to Earth and deal with.

651
00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:24,559
And but like he the in in
the movie or whatever, it starts

652
00:44:24,559 --> 00:44:30,639
with these in the afterlife and the
old gods like Zeus and other people but

653
00:44:30,880 --> 00:44:37,760
like Horus or whatever are like dying
because no one worships them anymore. Yeah,

654
00:44:37,119 --> 00:44:40,480
and he has to go back and
like fuck up Christians or something.

655
00:44:40,599 --> 00:44:46,559
I low key hope Gladiator Too is
just the nephew of Joaquin Phoenix. The

656
00:44:46,719 --> 00:44:51,960
little child grows up to be an
emperor and is just a giant piece of

657
00:44:51,960 --> 00:44:52,719
shit. He is in it.
I think. I don't know if he

658
00:44:52,760 --> 00:44:57,039
goes up championship, but I'm pretty
sure that actor is like worse than his

659
00:44:57,440 --> 00:45:00,559
uncle. Yeah, you gotta you
gotta get a bigger bad his uncle dad

660
00:45:00,639 --> 00:45:05,639
maybe thing, whatever that relationship was. I don't know. I think he

661
00:45:05,679 --> 00:45:07,039
was trying to fuck his sister.
Yeah, I definitely wanted to. Yeah,

662
00:45:07,079 --> 00:45:14,079
it was very stated, but uh
yeah. Basically, uh, Persephone

663
00:45:14,440 --> 00:45:16,440
is allowed to come like Zeus like, haities, you gotta give Persephone back.

664
00:45:16,480 --> 00:45:20,079
All the gods are hungry. And
he's like, yeah, all right,

665
00:45:20,159 --> 00:45:22,119
whatever, and he's like, hey, Persephone, before you go,

666
00:45:22,639 --> 00:45:25,679
here's this fruit, this pomegranate fruit. Why don't you have a couple of

667
00:45:25,760 --> 00:45:30,360
seeds from it? And she has, depending on the myth four to six

668
00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:35,159
seeds, and the fates had decreed
that if anyone eats in the underworld,

669
00:45:35,239 --> 00:45:38,079
they have to spend a corresponding amount
of time in the underworld for the rest

670
00:45:38,079 --> 00:45:45,360
of their life. So basically Persephone
for the four to six seeds had every

671
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:49,760
year had to go to the underworld
for half the time and during that time

672
00:45:49,840 --> 00:45:53,719
to meet her her mother mourns her
her return to the underworld, and it's

673
00:45:53,719 --> 00:45:59,320
basically the that's winner. It's winter, right. So it's a big myth

674
00:45:59,480 --> 00:46:05,519
about the birth and death cycle of
plants and animals, as well as how

675
00:46:05,559 --> 00:46:08,719
that kind of trickles up into humanity, the life cycle of I like how

676
00:46:08,760 --> 00:46:13,599
they need like allegory to explain it, like why does it get cold and

677
00:46:13,639 --> 00:46:17,519
the plants don't grow anymore. It
just does. It just does. Because

678
00:46:17,559 --> 00:46:22,960
it's January. Get inside, it
is so cold. Yeah, you want

679
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:28,719
to tell you a story, this
is why. Yeah. But what's interesting

680
00:46:28,760 --> 00:46:30,440
is that this is like, obviously
that's a myth that I think everyone that's

681
00:46:30,679 --> 00:46:34,639
you know, studied Greek mythology a
little bit, is very aware of.

682
00:46:35,239 --> 00:46:38,760
But it's the basis and like the
foundational basis for the Elucinian mysteries. But

683
00:46:38,800 --> 00:46:43,440
it's not like that's kind of the
secret but not really. Yeah. So

684
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:50,920
the Elucinian mysteries were so prominent that
for two thousand years on, there were

685
00:46:50,960 --> 00:46:54,559
two kind of festivals they did.
They did one it the beginning of spring

686
00:46:54,920 --> 00:46:58,679
to celebrate you know, oh shit. Yeah, it's probably like a local

687
00:46:58,719 --> 00:47:02,920
harvesting celebration where people just planted crops
together and like got drunken stuff. But

688
00:47:04,599 --> 00:47:07,599
it's September to signify the beginning of
winter. This is when like the big

689
00:47:07,639 --> 00:47:14,199
thing they did every year was so
they had a giant meeting in Athens where

690
00:47:14,280 --> 00:47:17,840
like up to three thousand people at
a time would show up to be initiated

691
00:47:17,960 --> 00:47:23,519
into the cult of or into the
Lucinian cult. And it was like politicians

692
00:47:23,519 --> 00:47:28,440
were in this, people of nobility
were in this. It was the most

693
00:47:28,719 --> 00:47:35,440
important religious group for that period.
And basically what they would do, you

694
00:47:35,440 --> 00:47:38,079
could only go to this thing one
time in your life too, so like

695
00:47:38,119 --> 00:47:42,239
they would have thousands of people show
up every year, slaves, women,

696
00:47:42,679 --> 00:47:45,599
men, free men, like,
it didn't matter if anyone could go,

697
00:47:45,639 --> 00:47:46,800
and they would never deny you even
if you were a slave. They'd be

698
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:52,159
like, yeah, you can go
to that. And they would basically go

699
00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:59,280
to this spot I guess the Agora
of Athens, and they would bring their

700
00:47:59,280 --> 00:48:04,159
own sacrificial animals and kind of get
ready for the festival to start. The

701
00:48:04,159 --> 00:48:07,079
next day, they would go down
to the sea with their animals, they

702
00:48:07,119 --> 00:48:10,840
would purify them. Then three days
of rest would happen until a certain date,

703
00:48:12,440 --> 00:48:15,599
and then they would fill it up
with even more initiates as people were

704
00:48:15,599 --> 00:48:19,280
coming in. There's a process of
there's just thousands of people cleaning their sacrificial

705
00:48:19,280 --> 00:48:23,280
animals in Athens and getting ready for
this. Then once everyone was ready to

706
00:48:23,519 --> 00:48:29,880
Eleusian Eleucinian priestesses were kind of put
into a procession. They'd lead them fifteen

707
00:48:29,920 --> 00:48:32,880
miles to Eleusis, where the myth
took place. And the reason why it's

708
00:48:32,880 --> 00:48:37,679
eleusis is because that's where Demeter was
like wreaking havoc. I guess in the

709
00:48:37,719 --> 00:48:43,519
myth. But anyway, they get
to this place called I'm trying to remember

710
00:48:43,800 --> 00:48:50,519
the Telestarian, which is like the
sanctum for this religion, and they'd make

711
00:48:50,559 --> 00:48:55,239
everybody fast, and they'd teach them
first the story of the Demeter persephone thing

712
00:48:55,280 --> 00:48:59,400
that was like the lesser mystery,
so you weren't really supposed to talk about

713
00:48:59,440 --> 00:49:01,960
that, but if you no one
really gave a shit, then common knowledge

714
00:49:02,079 --> 00:49:06,519
is like, but they'd make them
do this this other part. I think

715
00:49:06,559 --> 00:49:09,119
the fastest solely because of the famine. Well, no, the fastest to

716
00:49:09,280 --> 00:49:15,000
actually, uh it's to trigger a
I'm not saying for this religion specifically,

717
00:49:15,039 --> 00:49:20,760
but I think in general a lot
of religions kind of had fast because there

718
00:49:20,800 --> 00:49:23,119
was a lack of food. Oh, I mean, I I definitely could

719
00:49:23,159 --> 00:49:25,760
see like a fast being like as
a way to remember too that like,

720
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:30,800
hey, food's not guaranteed either,
you know, it's symbolic of like we

721
00:49:30,840 --> 00:49:32,360
know that. Sometimes I don't even
think it's symbolism. I think it's straight

722
00:49:32,440 --> 00:49:35,599
up, hey, we don't have
enough food. To get through the winner.

723
00:49:35,719 --> 00:49:39,239
If everyone eats every day, I
mean, yeah, it could be

724
00:49:39,280 --> 00:49:43,480
like you know, I think it's
just logistic. It's like maybe it could

725
00:49:43,519 --> 00:49:45,480
be representative to of like, hey, we're all giving up this one day,

726
00:49:45,519 --> 00:49:50,239
so we have another day in the
winter too. So stay woke because

727
00:49:51,079 --> 00:49:55,800
all this intermittent fast and all these
forty eight hour fast trends. Hm hmm.

728
00:49:57,079 --> 00:50:01,760
I wonder why the feast trends we
should bring that They want you to

729
00:50:01,760 --> 00:50:05,039
eat bugs into the limelight. Yeah, they want you to eat bugs.

730
00:50:05,039 --> 00:50:08,440
They want you to fast. Amen. Bugs are fine. Crickets are good

731
00:50:08,440 --> 00:50:14,400
crickets, that's right, shall see
eli. But yeah, so this like

732
00:50:15,199 --> 00:50:17,239
explaining of the mysteries the first group
and the charge of two hundred fifty bucks

733
00:50:17,239 --> 00:50:21,199
for that reading. It is funny
though that people are like, I'm never

734
00:50:21,199 --> 00:50:23,719
reading a fucking bug. And then
it's like, crack open a lobster.

735
00:50:24,840 --> 00:50:29,719
It's a set delicious. Yeah,
eat a fucking octopus. Yeah, which

736
00:50:30,000 --> 00:50:32,599
I'm starting to get away from that. I don't eat octopus anymore. It

737
00:50:32,679 --> 00:50:37,400
was good, But man, they're
so smart. They're aliens. They are

738
00:50:37,440 --> 00:50:38,880
so smart. I don't want their
eating an alien. I don't want their

739
00:50:38,920 --> 00:50:43,800
space ancestors coming down soon and be
like, hey, where's all our octopus?

740
00:50:43,880 --> 00:50:45,639
Oh shit, we went to Central
Market. We saw what you did.

741
00:50:45,760 --> 00:50:49,519
Well, they're just gonna rip Italy
out of Europe and toss it into

742
00:50:49,559 --> 00:50:52,320
space. Dude. Yeah, Italy, Spain pretty much the entire Iberian impendence.

743
00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:55,519
That's why they gave up. Actually, Italy and Spain they're like,

744
00:50:55,760 --> 00:50:59,599
our days are numbered? Do you
see what we did to these things?

745
00:51:00,039 --> 00:51:04,239
I don't think we eat enough smart
animals because he the protein and octopus is

746
00:51:04,239 --> 00:51:07,079
incredible. Oh dude, you think
I don't need enough pig? Yeah,

747
00:51:07,159 --> 00:51:09,719
pig, I'm sure you plenty of
pig. But I think we need to

748
00:51:09,719 --> 00:51:15,159
go even further. Dolphin, elephant. I want to some elephant right now.

749
00:51:15,280 --> 00:51:17,480
Yeah, I want to eat.
What do you eat first though?

750
00:51:17,519 --> 00:51:22,199
In the elephant? Just some ass
meat? Yeah, that's probably like for

751
00:51:22,239 --> 00:51:23,960
the steak and stuff. But I
think maybe you could make some great tacos

752
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:28,000
out of the trunk, you know, like you put the you you smoke

753
00:51:28,079 --> 00:51:30,719
the whole trunk and then you just
scoop out the meat. Then you can

754
00:51:30,760 --> 00:51:34,639
make like ivory utensils out of the
tusks. Well, use every part.

755
00:51:34,840 --> 00:51:40,320
Yeah, yeah, you guys want
to poach later hell yeah, always be

756
00:51:40,400 --> 00:51:43,760
put. Apparently, when I was
working at the hunting company I was at,

757
00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:49,199
someone was telling me there's like an
Austin poaching bucket list for like what

758
00:51:49,400 --> 00:51:52,719
it's like, kill a like stuff
like kill a dove within Austin city limits,

759
00:51:53,039 --> 00:51:57,719
like just like during dumb season that's
not really or like yeah, just

760
00:51:57,760 --> 00:52:00,360
like random shit like oh, if
you get a deer like on off BKA

761
00:52:00,559 --> 00:52:04,440
Road or something like that. You
know, so there's like a bucket list

762
00:52:04,480 --> 00:52:07,639
for that, which I found like
horrifying and hilarious at the same time because

763
00:52:07,679 --> 00:52:09,800
it's like, eh, I mean, our friend Matt he would he told

764
00:52:09,840 --> 00:52:15,119
me about how like the Rednecks and
his fraternity would literally go to behind Miszoo's

765
00:52:15,159 --> 00:52:21,559
basketball areno because there's like a woods
right behind it and shoot deer guys that

766
00:52:21,679 --> 00:52:25,039
is in the city limits. How
do you think they solved the homeless crisis

767
00:52:25,039 --> 00:52:30,880
here? That was a different bucket
list. No, it's still poaching.

768
00:52:30,440 --> 00:52:35,639
It's poaching. Actually poaching is illegal
hunting, Yeah, yeah, this is

769
00:52:35,679 --> 00:52:39,039
clandestinely legal. So the crag Abbott
Mystery School, you're gonna drink a bunch

770
00:52:39,039 --> 00:52:44,480
of loan start I'm gonna give you
a rifle seven hours. What happens happens?

771
00:52:44,559 --> 00:52:45,880
Yeah, uh, real quick,
before we get back to proving why

772
00:52:46,199 --> 00:52:51,280
Jesus is Lord and the Pope is
infallible, which is what I've gathered this

773
00:52:51,280 --> 00:52:52,800
episode is about so far. We
do have some ads, and the first

774
00:52:52,920 --> 00:52:57,280
is Indo Chino. Go to Indo
Chino dot com. That's I N D

775
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815
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820
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821
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822
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825
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826
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827
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828
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829
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protein. Like it is not a
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830
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831
00:56:42,920 --> 00:56:45,239
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839
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840
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841
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842
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843
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844
00:57:32,840 --> 00:57:38,280
They have five different blends in the
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845
00:57:38,280 --> 00:57:42,639
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846
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848
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849
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852
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875
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important note though, between the two
mysteries, the lesser mystery, which was

876
00:59:21,480 --> 00:59:24,360
the myth, and the greater mystery, which is so fucking fraddy, it's

877
00:59:24,440 --> 00:59:30,760
ridiculous. They were given what is
called a drink out of what was called

878
00:59:30,760 --> 00:59:36,719
a kikion. Now this kikion is
a sacramental vase. A lot of the

879
00:59:36,800 --> 00:59:38,920
different like you'll see like the myths
portrayed on these vases too, So like

880
00:59:38,960 --> 00:59:43,440
you know when you see like the
scenes on vases, they were drinking something

881
00:59:43,440 --> 00:59:47,079
out of it in a fastested state
before the second round. And the recipe

882
00:59:47,119 --> 00:59:52,679
is so empty stomach, empty stomach, and the recipes water, honey,

883
00:59:52,440 --> 00:59:55,599
barley. There's one other thing.
I forget what it was. I didn't

884
00:59:55,599 --> 01:00:01,079
write it down for some reason.
But these or things, it's like,

885
01:00:01,119 --> 01:00:05,880
oh, maybe there's some sort of
like ergot things happening because it's water,

886
01:00:05,960 --> 01:00:10,039
grain, honey, you're creating the
fermentation process. They have found Ergo traces

887
01:00:10,079 --> 01:00:14,199
in these vases as well, so
they think it might have been hallucinatory,

888
01:00:14,480 --> 01:00:19,639
like on an LSD level. But
also someone had done some research and when

889
01:00:19,639 --> 01:00:22,719
you switched the ingredients, like they
were like, why is water listed in

890
01:00:22,760 --> 01:00:24,840
a drink recipe? Of course water's
in it. Yeah, you wouldn't list

891
01:00:24,840 --> 01:00:30,199
that unless there's a reason for it. And someone figured out that the ingredients.

892
01:00:30,559 --> 01:00:34,119
If you wrote them in ancient Greek, the first letter of each one

893
01:00:34,800 --> 01:00:39,199
spelled out a word that was the
hidden secret ingredient, which was a type

894
01:00:39,199 --> 01:00:44,320
of mushroom. Oh yeah, so
either they were tripping off of an acid

895
01:00:44,320 --> 01:00:46,639
type trip or a mushroom type trip, is what the or both or or

896
01:00:46,719 --> 01:00:50,960
both they were on LSD and mushrooms. Yeah, I mean, I don't

897
01:00:51,000 --> 01:00:52,480
even know. They just leave that
room and you're like, yeah, God

898
01:00:52,559 --> 01:00:58,199
was there, and there's many gods. So one of the people that was

899
01:00:58,239 --> 01:01:04,400
an initiate in this group was Plutarch, who was I believe a I want

900
01:01:04,400 --> 01:01:08,360
to say he was a student of
Plato, but I can't remember off the

901
01:01:08,360 --> 01:01:10,880
top of it he was. He
was very proud of the forgotten guys.

902
01:01:12,599 --> 01:01:16,159
He was Plutarch, Plutarch Roman,
but I'm trying to remember. Oh yeah,

903
01:01:16,199 --> 01:01:20,320
yeah, sorry, Yeah he's a
philosopher. But yeah, so Plutarch

904
01:01:20,360 --> 01:01:23,800
talks about we should do an episode
about the forgotten philosophers. Plutarch, there's

905
01:01:23,800 --> 01:01:27,920
the Big Three. Plutark's B tier
for sure. Oh yeah, I don't

906
01:01:27,920 --> 01:01:32,199
even want be tire. I want
like Z tier. You want philosophers.

907
01:01:32,239 --> 01:01:36,599
I want dudes that were just hanging
out in like one hundred he was taking

908
01:01:36,639 --> 01:01:38,519
to sixth Street and find some Z
tier philosophers. He was during He was

909
01:01:38,599 --> 01:01:45,480
during when Rome ran Greece, but
he was Greek. He was definitely not

910
01:01:45,000 --> 01:01:49,360
a direct student of Plato. They
were like about one hundred years apart,

911
01:01:49,639 --> 01:01:52,800
was it. Aristotle was after Plato, and Aristotle taught Alexander the Great?

912
01:01:52,840 --> 01:01:58,559
But was Aristotle like the total psychopath? No, that's the first one.

913
01:01:59,119 --> 01:02:01,760
He was like the loo hobo Socrates. Yeah, yeah, Socrates. He

914
01:02:01,880 --> 01:02:05,880
was like, well Socrates. Uh. They also think was an initiative.

915
01:02:05,920 --> 01:02:08,679
This okay, and he they think
one of the reasons he was like,

916
01:02:09,400 --> 01:02:13,559
hey, you can either fuck.
Like. The impiety thing that he got

917
01:02:13,639 --> 01:02:16,679
charged with was because not only was
he like teaching students shit that just wasn't

918
01:02:16,679 --> 01:02:21,559
going with societal norms, but also
he was giving up mysteries. Like he

919
01:02:21,639 --> 01:02:24,199
was telling people like, oh good, this is what we do, and

920
01:02:24,239 --> 01:02:28,239
like, hey, you never talk
about ritual dog. It's just funny me

921
01:02:28,280 --> 01:02:30,679
that the first of the three philosophers
was like a man wearing a barrel.

922
01:02:31,280 --> 01:02:35,159
He was just stinky. Yeah,
there was another one. It was just

923
01:02:35,199 --> 01:02:37,679
like a guy with the end is
near and someone was like I must learn

924
01:02:37,719 --> 01:02:40,440
from you. And then then they
just kept going and it became school.

925
01:02:40,639 --> 01:02:45,840
He's like the first person ever contemplate
death. Yeah, that would drive you

926
01:02:45,880 --> 01:02:47,679
insane. Probably, Yeah, I
mean he was barrel guy. Right.

927
01:02:47,760 --> 01:02:52,039
So there was also one of the
z tier philosophers that died because he had

928
01:02:52,039 --> 01:02:54,280
a really shiny bald head. I
guess like eagles would drop turtles on rocks

929
01:02:54,280 --> 01:02:58,079
to kill him. And so an
eagle dropped a turtle on his head?

930
01:02:58,239 --> 01:03:00,920
Was he the first person to like
get conscious? He's just a wo Socrates.

931
01:03:01,000 --> 01:03:07,079
No, I I think someone murdered
that guy and was like, oh,

932
01:03:07,280 --> 01:03:12,440
no, turtle, the turtle,
the eagle did it. No,

933
01:03:12,519 --> 01:03:15,079
he was murdered, right, He's
put to death. Socraties put to death.

934
01:03:15,480 --> 01:03:21,599
He could choose to either renounce his
teachings or he had to poison himself

935
01:03:21,599 --> 01:03:23,239
with a hemlock, which I learned
how to identify today. So I don't

936
01:03:23,239 --> 01:03:28,639
eat it because it looks just like
fucking cares feed me the poison. Yeah,

937
01:03:28,920 --> 01:03:31,079
he's like, I'll take the I'll
take the hell. But yeah,

938
01:03:31,159 --> 01:03:37,440
so these people, Plutarch talked about
the actual initiation and basically he's like,

939
01:03:37,480 --> 01:03:40,480
yeah, it was complete darkness.
I'm losing my mind. I'm going through

940
01:03:40,519 --> 01:03:46,119
hell basically, and then I see
a divine light and it's fields of people

941
01:03:46,239 --> 01:03:52,039
dancing and like partying and having a
great time. So they basically, I

942
01:03:52,039 --> 01:03:54,639
think what they did was they'd hold
wink them, they'd basically just cover them

943
01:03:54,719 --> 01:03:58,920
up, fuck with them, kind
of like the Kyo Coffin thing. It's

944
01:03:58,960 --> 01:04:01,119
like, you're dead. You're fucking
dead. You're dead now, you piece

945
01:04:01,159 --> 01:04:04,239
of shit. And they're tripping balls
and they haven't eaten, and they've gone

946
01:04:04,239 --> 01:04:09,679
through like a fifteen mile hike and
they've done all this shit to yeah,

947
01:04:09,719 --> 01:04:13,840
and then at the end they're like, and now you're initiated. You're a

948
01:04:13,880 --> 01:04:19,400
brother now in this in this great
world, and you've you've dealt with the

949
01:04:19,440 --> 01:04:23,679
pains and the fear of death.
You no longer have that as a barrier

950
01:04:23,760 --> 01:04:26,440
for your life to be what you
want it to be. And it was

951
01:04:26,480 --> 01:04:30,599
so important that everyone fucking did this
shit, like almost everyone did this shit

952
01:04:30,679 --> 01:04:33,199
in Greece, so like it was
a way to conquer the fear of death

953
01:04:33,239 --> 01:04:38,239
in order to live a better life. But again the concept of being born

954
01:04:38,280 --> 01:04:43,920
again was very important and it it
kind of assimilates into Christianity a little bit

955
01:04:43,960 --> 01:04:47,559
too, because there's this whole cleansing
period. But the difference is it's secret,

956
01:04:47,679 --> 01:04:50,280
right, and it's based on secret
knowledge. I know there's a part

957
01:04:50,320 --> 01:04:55,079
of Christianity too in its earlier years
where it was also very secretive. Yeah,

958
01:04:55,119 --> 01:04:59,119
and you know a lot of people
believe that early Christianity was just another

959
01:04:59,239 --> 01:05:04,239
form of a mystery school until it
gained statewide prominence, like and became the

960
01:05:04,800 --> 01:05:10,760
power, right that is. But
another funny story about this specific thing.

961
01:05:10,800 --> 01:05:15,719
The secret of the Lucinian mystery was
definitely the drugs because one guy apparently had

962
01:05:15,760 --> 01:05:19,079
dinner parties and like authorities busted it
down. I think this is in like

963
01:05:19,639 --> 01:05:24,480
three hundred eighties or something like that. They're busting parties for drugs and three

964
01:05:24,519 --> 01:05:29,880
hundred a d. Not just drugs, the Elucinian drugs. Because he was

965
01:05:30,400 --> 01:05:32,280
given out you were only allowed to
do this once in your life, so

966
01:05:32,320 --> 01:05:34,239
he was just like, that's the
best start about life. He's like,

967
01:05:34,239 --> 01:05:38,000
I gotta do this all the time. So he's having trip parties and people

968
01:05:38,000 --> 01:05:41,840
are like, you're propagating the mystery
and you're giving it out to whoever.

969
01:05:42,280 --> 01:05:45,679
I believe they killed him. He
was a noble in Athens at the time,

970
01:05:45,960 --> 01:05:49,679
and that's a a go to playbook. Like last last week, I

971
01:05:49,719 --> 01:05:56,760
was talking about the assassins. Yeah, Saba getting everybody high on opium.

972
01:05:56,840 --> 01:06:00,079
Oh yeah, fucking in a garden. Yeah. My next note here was

973
01:06:00,119 --> 01:06:03,239
literally, Yeah, it turns out
giving people drugs is a really good way

974
01:06:03,239 --> 01:06:08,719
of getting your message across. It's
the best. Great assassins. Tell a

975
01:06:08,760 --> 01:06:12,599
friend about this podcast and give the
mushrooms before they listen. Yeah, absolutely,

976
01:06:12,920 --> 01:06:14,800
or watch it on YouTube. We
all know you're on them. We

977
01:06:14,840 --> 01:06:15,880
all know you're on them. Okay, cool, Yeah, got them there.

978
01:06:16,440 --> 01:06:20,000
But yeah, either way. Again, the story features the demeter.

979
01:06:20,119 --> 01:06:24,320
Story is a story of descent and
then you relive it as well as an

980
01:06:24,360 --> 01:06:28,320
initiate. It's all about descending,
dying on the cross, whatever you want

981
01:06:28,360 --> 01:06:30,519
to call it, and being reborn
with a sense of divinity and that you're

982
01:06:30,559 --> 01:06:34,880
in touch with God in the afterlife. I mean, I think Catholicism has

983
01:06:34,920 --> 01:06:42,159
a version of that, because if
you've ever attended in entire stations of the

984
01:06:42,199 --> 01:06:46,679
Cross, it was like being crucified. Not only was I there, rob

985
01:06:46,719 --> 01:06:51,039
I participated. I was a Roman
soldier. I have been an aultar boy,

986
01:06:51,079 --> 01:06:55,119
in many decisions of the cross,
which is actually I was not good

987
01:06:55,199 --> 01:06:58,519
enough to be Jesus. Oh my
buddy, got it not ripped enough.

988
01:06:58,599 --> 01:07:03,320
He did die though unrelated Oh did
he come back? He did not come

989
01:07:03,360 --> 01:07:08,599
back? Yeah, unrelated totally.
The last mystery school IM going to talk

990
01:07:08,599 --> 01:07:11,880
about this is give me a longer
episode is the influence of Osyrus and isis

991
01:07:12,880 --> 01:07:15,360
So we're getting a couple of different
spots. Yeah, Cyrus is one that

992
01:07:15,599 --> 01:07:20,920
is like a big one that they
always mentioned, like Judus the first But

993
01:07:20,960 --> 01:07:25,320
that's the same thing, like like
are we ted? Like I joked earlier,

994
01:07:25,360 --> 01:07:28,440
it's like like it's such an easy, lazy miracle to be like,

995
01:07:28,480 --> 01:07:32,360
oh it's a baby did did nobody? Fucker pussy? Like it's the same

996
01:07:32,400 --> 01:07:35,719
thing with like, oh, hey
but he died, but yeah he did

997
01:07:35,760 --> 01:07:41,239
it. Why didn't Abel come back? He was a bitch? Yeah he

998
01:07:41,320 --> 01:07:45,119
had it coming. Little probably little
farmer boy bitch got the ship kicks.

999
01:07:46,159 --> 01:07:50,840
Figured out the logistics of how the
family grew. Seth. Well, yeah

1000
01:07:50,840 --> 01:07:56,400
there was Seth. There's an entire
religion, right, there's no dude said

1001
01:07:56,400 --> 01:07:59,840
that I have DIBs on Seth.
Okay, yeah, but it's really in

1002
01:07:59,880 --> 01:08:02,199
the gnosticism, So how many daughters
do they have? Because are they just

1003
01:08:02,239 --> 01:08:05,320
fucking their mom? Like what are
they doing? They explain that in canon,

1004
01:08:05,360 --> 01:08:10,280
don't they. I don't recall,
but yeah, it's very explained,

1005
01:08:10,320 --> 01:08:13,880
like there's more than just canaan Able
and Seth, and there's probably more than

1006
01:08:13,920 --> 01:08:17,359
Adam and Eve. I'd imagine,
well there's Lilith and you know. Yeah,

1007
01:08:17,399 --> 01:08:19,680
but don't worry about that. Yeah, we won't. That's a whole

1008
01:08:19,720 --> 01:08:25,880
other episode. You should do that
episode though, but yeah, you know.

1009
01:08:25,880 --> 01:08:29,880
The Egyptian mysteries of Isis and Osiris
were revered not only in Rome but

1010
01:08:29,920 --> 01:08:34,600
in many other places where Christian communities
were starting to get big. The legend

1011
01:08:34,600 --> 01:08:39,880
basically was that they were brother and
sister and husband and wife. O cyrus

1012
01:08:39,960 --> 01:08:44,279
Is murdered, his coffin body is
thrown into the Nile, and shortly afterward,

1013
01:08:44,359 --> 01:08:47,119
the widowed, exiled Isis gives birth
to their son Horace. So Horace

1014
01:08:47,199 --> 01:08:50,560
is not depending on who you ask, like in this mystery school, it's

1015
01:08:50,600 --> 01:08:54,960
he's not of virgin birth. It's
just the birth of a god. Right.

1016
01:08:56,640 --> 01:09:00,840
Meanwhile, the coffin washes up on
the Syrian coast and becomes miraculously lodged

1017
01:09:00,840 --> 01:09:04,319
in the trunk of a tree.
So he's again stuck in wood or affixed

1018
01:09:04,359 --> 01:09:09,039
to some sort of upright wooden thing. Right, it gets cut down and

1019
01:09:09,039 --> 01:09:14,359
made into a pillar in the Palace
of Biblos, and uh Isis finds it,

1020
01:09:15,239 --> 01:09:18,960
so she scrapes up all of his
dismembered body from the coffin and restores

1021
01:09:19,000 --> 01:09:23,159
him to life and installs him as
king of the Underworld or the nether World,

1022
01:09:23,239 --> 01:09:25,920
whatever you want to call. It's
kind of like a zombie Osiris,

1023
01:09:25,960 --> 01:09:28,560
Like he's kind of like depicted as
like a dead guy. Yeah, he

1024
01:09:28,680 --> 01:09:30,560
is the he is the ethereal god. Yeah, at this point, and

1025
01:09:30,600 --> 01:09:35,760
then Horace meanwhile is a man now
he just he becomes the rain on Earth,

1026
01:09:36,279 --> 01:09:40,119
like the ruler on Earth, becoming
the third person. And we talked

1027
01:09:40,119 --> 01:09:43,079
about this last week on Patreon.
Him and set go back and forth.

1028
01:09:44,239 --> 01:09:46,039
That's true. Yeah, they're a
little tricksters. Yeah, trying to trick

1029
01:09:46,079 --> 01:09:53,560
each other and who can win with
anal sex and breath holding contests five sex?

1030
01:09:54,119 --> 01:09:58,199
Yeah. Well well yeah, you
said the right, but he was

1031
01:09:58,239 --> 01:10:01,399
just hitting thigh. Yeah, uh, but idiot, shouldn't you if you

1032
01:10:01,399 --> 01:10:04,039
can't tell the difference between a buttthole
and thigh. And if you're a man

1033
01:10:04,119 --> 01:10:06,560
and you have come on your hands, you gotta cut him off. Got

1034
01:10:06,680 --> 01:10:11,399
cut off. That's that was that
was realistic. But well, no,

1035
01:10:11,439 --> 01:10:13,479
you got to show your mom she
cut him off. Yeah, I mean,

1036
01:10:13,479 --> 01:10:15,760
well you can cut How are you
supposed to cut your own hands off?

1037
01:10:15,840 --> 01:10:16,840
You're holding all go to your mom
and you said, bomb, my

1038
01:10:16,880 --> 01:10:19,319
hands are covered in jis if you
think any of this is just us being

1039
01:10:19,319 --> 01:10:23,840
stupid, by the way, it's
very much it's real story. Yeah,

1040
01:10:23,920 --> 01:10:28,600
it's it is Egyptian lore. But
yeah, so the Egyptians really were the

1041
01:10:28,640 --> 01:10:32,479
first people to like kind of kick
off the Holy Trinity concept of o Cyrus

1042
01:10:32,560 --> 01:10:39,000
isis Horus. Okay, but yeah, records show that there was a festival

1043
01:10:39,000 --> 01:10:43,239
celebrating this each year in Egypt,
and it celebrated the resurrection of Osyrus and

1044
01:10:43,319 --> 01:10:45,720
also all of the dead. But
also, if you think about it,

1045
01:10:45,800 --> 01:10:49,159
right, like you're starting a religion, do you really want to develop more

1046
01:10:49,199 --> 01:10:54,439
than three characters? That's a lot. I don't know how the Greeks did.

1047
01:10:54,399 --> 01:10:57,039
It's bad movie. It's just too
many. Well, that's why the

1048
01:10:57,039 --> 01:11:00,199
Greeks, like the Greek gods and
the Roman gods and everything. There's a

1049
01:11:00,239 --> 01:11:03,239
lot of like like Betier that you
forget about because it's like they're all like

1050
01:11:03,279 --> 01:11:06,199
Marvel, right, they're all trash. It's it's the same thing like they're

1051
01:11:06,319 --> 01:11:12,239
like comic book superheroes. You have
a lot of like lower level ones.

1052
01:11:12,399 --> 01:11:15,399
And that's why whatever stage they're in
now for Marvel is awful. Yeah,

1053
01:11:15,479 --> 01:11:19,640
because you're you're really scraping the fucking
bin. So it's the same thing with

1054
01:11:19,760 --> 01:11:25,600
Catholicism too, Right, You've got
you got Jesus and God, then you've

1055
01:11:25,600 --> 01:11:29,359
got the big saints like Saint Patrick, Mary, Saint Patrick. Then you

1056
01:11:29,399 --> 01:11:31,960
start getting in lesser saints. I
also told Corny last night our conversation about

1057
01:11:31,960 --> 01:11:34,199
Saint Blaize. So I just lie
to her a lot, just for fun,

1058
01:11:34,279 --> 01:11:36,560
okay, and just to just to
funk. We do that to us

1059
01:11:36,600 --> 01:11:40,800
too, so on this very podcast. Yeah, yeah, and uh but

1060
01:11:40,800 --> 01:11:44,600
but it I do that because then
but I like to tell her insane things

1061
01:11:44,600 --> 01:11:47,199
that are true just to throw her
off, just throw in a ranch.

1062
01:11:47,439 --> 01:11:49,880
Yeah. So I told her about
Saint Blaze and I was like, I

1063
01:11:49,920 --> 01:11:54,039
was like, yeah, we have
a patron saint of choking and she was

1064
01:11:54,119 --> 01:11:56,279
like, no, you don't,
that's made up. And I was like,

1065
01:11:56,319 --> 01:11:58,760
google it, same place, Patron
Saint of Choking, same place,

1066
01:11:59,279 --> 01:12:00,840
and she was like, I'm not
googling it. It's fake. You're not

1067
01:12:00,840 --> 01:12:03,560
gonna trick me. It's the Ladies
call Me in the Bedroom, same play,

1068
01:12:05,359 --> 01:12:11,159
just the patron Saint of Choking,
same play as actually strengths as Wiener,

1069
01:12:11,239 --> 01:12:16,359
so they don't joke. That's sosaccurate. Yeah, but she googled it

1070
01:12:16,399 --> 01:12:19,680
and was furious because now she doesn't
know, she's going to waste her time

1071
01:12:19,720 --> 01:12:29,039
on the front. But yeah,
they celebrate this, this Osiris thing basically

1072
01:12:29,199 --> 01:12:31,680
at the exact same It was co
opted into All Saints Day Are All Souls

1073
01:12:31,760 --> 01:12:38,680
Day basically remembering the dead was there
ship on November first, and second it

1074
01:12:38,760 --> 01:12:42,079
was on the eighth, but yeah, it was beginning of November based Okay.

1075
01:12:42,199 --> 01:12:46,479
Yeah, there's also, uh,
something that's kind of interesting about isis

1076
01:12:46,520 --> 01:12:51,399
this isn't dead ass months, so
it yeah, it is. Isis is

1077
01:12:51,479 --> 01:12:56,800
likely to have a direct bearing on
the elevation of Mary as a figure in

1078
01:12:56,840 --> 01:13:01,520
Catholicism as well. Isis had two
capacities which her worshippers uh worshiped her for

1079
01:13:01,720 --> 01:13:05,319
the images they saw of her and
represented her in one of sorrow for the

1080
01:13:05,359 --> 01:13:09,720
death of Osiris. So the weeping
Virgin Mary is a pretty direct parallel,

1081
01:13:09,880 --> 01:13:15,600
right, and then the other of
her nurturing her son Horace, which is

1082
01:13:15,680 --> 01:13:20,880
very similar to the Madonna yeah imagery, right, And it was so similar

1083
01:13:21,039 --> 01:13:26,520
the way those things were depicted that
like archaeologists searching things in that time would

1084
01:13:26,560 --> 01:13:29,560
often have a hard time figuring out
if they were looking at a depiction of

1085
01:13:29,960 --> 01:13:32,479
Isis or the Virgin Mary. That's
wild. That's a little bit surprising though,

1086
01:13:32,479 --> 01:13:36,600
because well, people don't know when
they I don't know when they split

1087
01:13:36,680 --> 01:13:45,560
off for what the how they became
different. But prior to I think I

1088
01:13:45,560 --> 01:13:48,800
could be tilly wrong on this,
but prior to is probably conquering Egypt.

1089
01:13:49,039 --> 01:13:54,039
Yeah, probably, Uh, Christianity
was booming in Egypt. They so the

1090
01:13:54,079 --> 01:13:58,760
Coptic Christians in Egypt or whatever.
I don't know when Coptics became their own

1091
01:13:58,800 --> 01:14:03,479
thing or anything like that, but
Christianity latched on I think pretty prey what

1092
01:14:03,520 --> 01:14:09,840
happened before the Catholic Crusades, Yeah, all the mother fucking crusades. Yeah,

1093
01:14:10,159 --> 01:14:12,399
they're like but the but with Islam
and it's like, oh, what

1094
01:14:12,439 --> 01:14:15,279
are you trying to conquer everything?
Oh, you're not trying to like retake

1095
01:14:15,319 --> 01:14:19,319
no everything, all all. It's
a lot easier of a mission. Yeah,

1096
01:14:19,399 --> 01:14:23,479
dude, just like this is ours. I mean, if you want

1097
01:14:23,520 --> 01:14:29,000
to call the beginning of Islam,
I kind of think the the ancient they

1098
01:14:28,960 --> 01:14:31,560
say anent the ancient period ended at
the end of Rome, but I kind

1099
01:14:31,600 --> 01:14:35,000
of really and I kind of think
there was a that's fine, but I

1100
01:14:35,079 --> 01:14:38,600
kind of think there was like a
middle like not a middle period, a

1101
01:14:38,640 --> 01:14:44,159
little odd awkward transitional period between the
ancient times fall Rome to the Middle Ages.

1102
01:14:44,159 --> 01:14:48,079
And I think the beginning of the
Middle Ages is basically the Muslim conquests

1103
01:14:48,199 --> 01:14:51,800
beginning, so like four hundred to
six hundred I think is like an awkward

1104
01:14:51,800 --> 01:14:57,439
transition phase. I wouldn't necessarily call
like five hundred AD, you know,

1105
01:14:58,000 --> 01:15:00,880
the medieval period and the Crusades are
the Catholic strikes back. Yeah, right,

1106
01:15:00,960 --> 01:15:06,600
exactly. But I think the first
I think the first non ancient colonial

1107
01:15:08,560 --> 01:15:15,920
endeavor was Islam. Yeah, post
Rome, absolutely, I would have a

1108
01:15:15,920 --> 01:15:18,359
hard time. I mean, I'm
sure you could refute that, and honestly,

1109
01:15:18,399 --> 01:15:21,640
they were probably you gotta speak to
like successful too. I think,

1110
01:15:21,720 --> 01:15:24,680
like I'm sure people were trying to
do some shit, well, right,

1111
01:15:24,720 --> 01:15:27,000
I mean, but there was a
little bit before that, like the Byzantines,

1112
01:15:27,000 --> 01:15:30,359
the Eastern Roman Empire. They at
one point reconquered quite a bit of

1113
01:15:30,399 --> 01:15:32,159
the Roman Empire, but they were
still the Roman Empire. They were just

1114
01:15:32,199 --> 01:15:36,760
kind of trying to politically retaking the
lands ahead. And you could definitely call

1115
01:15:36,800 --> 01:15:43,159
the Roman Empire up for the time
a semi global empire, as big as

1116
01:15:43,239 --> 01:15:45,720
any empire could be. There was
Chinese, yeah, I mean stuff about

1117
01:15:45,720 --> 01:15:49,359
the same size. But in terms
of like the first like it's not modern,

1118
01:15:49,439 --> 01:15:57,279
but the first like non ancient global
or like super regional colonial power was

1119
01:15:57,359 --> 01:16:00,039
the Umiya. However you say it
calif Yeah, no, I mean that's

1120
01:16:00,079 --> 01:16:06,399
totally fair. Yeah, I mean
because you know you're that designation of after

1121
01:16:06,479 --> 01:16:12,079
antiquity, right, That's why that's
that. Yeah, but yeah, no,

1122
01:16:12,199 --> 01:16:15,560
totally I think all in although,
like I found it pretty interesting how

1123
01:16:15,920 --> 01:16:19,479
like all these different things were very
prevalent in their locale, so like Greece

1124
01:16:19,600 --> 01:16:24,279
or Persia or Egypt, and like
Christians were just so good at like no,

1125
01:16:24,439 --> 01:16:28,000
no, that's us too. Yeah, And I don't think that's a

1126
01:16:29,079 --> 01:16:31,239
I don't think I think it's brilliant. And that's why Christianity is the largest

1127
01:16:31,279 --> 01:16:34,279
religion world. I mean, like
it makes total sense, right, Like

1128
01:16:34,359 --> 01:16:41,039
Rome is trying to do this on
like a governance form with their government and

1129
01:16:41,239 --> 01:16:44,760
new places. And do you know
how many Catholics there are? It's like

1130
01:16:44,840 --> 01:16:47,359
half of Christians, right, there's
a billion Catholics. Yeah, and there's

1131
01:16:47,399 --> 01:16:50,760
like two billion Christians or something.
I think there's three billion Christians and two

1132
01:16:50,800 --> 01:16:56,880
billion Muslims. Yeah, it's insane. I didn't realize after Christianity and Islam,

1133
01:16:56,920 --> 01:17:00,199
you know what the next biggest one
is Jay? How many Jews are

1134
01:17:00,239 --> 01:17:02,720
It's it's like tenth, it's point
one. How many Jews are there?

1135
01:17:02,840 --> 01:17:06,159
It's I think it's like fourteen to
sixteen million. Lest Why is that day?

1136
01:17:06,439 --> 01:17:14,279
What happened? What's your bit bit
happened? What happened? We didn't

1137
01:17:14,319 --> 01:17:18,079
do much conquering that's why. Okay, yeah, we didn't conquer? Is

1138
01:17:18,119 --> 01:17:23,319
that? Why? What? Dude? Say it loud? Say what you're

1139
01:17:23,359 --> 01:17:26,920
trying to say, be a fucking
cot You've been slaughtered countless times. Yeah

1140
01:17:26,920 --> 01:17:30,960
we're still here, motherfucker. I
know you guys, are you're doing it?

1141
01:17:30,079 --> 01:17:34,000
Yeah, we're doing it. But
the graph is really just like ded

1142
01:17:34,079 --> 01:17:40,199
deep deep deep bear deep deep bear. Jake, what the fuck do you

1143
01:17:40,199 --> 01:17:43,720
think I was saying? I just
wanted you to say it. You guys

1144
01:17:43,720 --> 01:17:48,159
get slaughtered a lot. Yeah,
dude, we're still here, not because

1145
01:17:48,199 --> 01:17:54,399
of anything you did. No,
we're just out here making movies. Bro

1146
01:17:55,880 --> 01:18:00,840
in the words in the words of
p Diddy in the song Welcome to Atlanta

1147
01:18:00,880 --> 01:18:09,800
remix, we still hear and we
building fomo new towers. That's fucking sick.

1148
01:18:09,920 --> 01:18:14,159
Yeah, we did build the first
two, and we collected the insurance

1149
01:18:14,359 --> 01:18:18,640
on that. We got that payment. Baby, it's all coming up us.

1150
01:18:19,760 --> 01:18:24,239
No man, but I found it
really fascinating. I think the Lucinian

1151
01:18:24,840 --> 01:18:28,359
mysteries are by far the most interesting
ones. I wish we knew more about

1152
01:18:28,439 --> 01:18:32,359
them. There's a lot of really
interesting other There's like an entire mystery school

1153
01:18:32,359 --> 01:18:36,239
based around sailors. I have to
see a Scooby Scooby Doo based on this

1154
01:18:39,079 --> 01:18:44,840
Scooby do you in the run row
Undrak from the Kiki Yak. Your face

1155
01:18:45,039 --> 01:18:48,800
it's melting. I can't. I'm
no, I think I'm banging when I'm

1156
01:18:48,800 --> 01:18:55,159
trying to Scooby do Hey, scoop
Man, I can see my bones.

1157
01:18:56,520 --> 01:19:01,560
Yeah, I can't clearly adopted the
dog, Scooby. So dumb Baine walks

1158
01:19:01,560 --> 01:19:06,079
in. You know who did the
voice for Shaggy, Casey Caseum. What?

1159
01:19:06,439 --> 01:19:11,039
Yeah, I would think he would
do Freddy over anybody. Casey Caseum

1160
01:19:11,039 --> 01:19:14,479
did the voice of Shaggy. I
can do it, Casey Kaseum, do

1161
01:19:14,600 --> 01:19:17,560
it now, we're coming. God
damn it. It takes a second.

1162
01:19:17,600 --> 01:19:19,520
I can't do it on the spot. But up, that's fine, that's

1163
01:19:19,560 --> 01:19:24,239
fair. So some of them you
need to get your getting them right mental,

1164
01:19:24,680 --> 01:19:30,359
mental and dedication. You have to, like Casey case We'll try again

1165
01:19:30,439 --> 01:19:32,800
next episode. Thank you. I've
done it before. I'll do it again

1166
01:19:32,880 --> 01:19:35,000
one day. I have to hear
his voice too. But yeah, no,

1167
01:19:35,039 --> 01:19:38,079
I just wanted to get into all
the things you guys co opted into

1168
01:19:38,079 --> 01:19:41,079
your own religion. I'm actually very
proud of it as a marketer. I

1169
01:19:41,079 --> 01:19:44,279
think it's very fascinating how you guys
just were like, we're doing the thing,

1170
01:19:44,800 --> 01:19:47,399
We're getting everybody in the tent were
riding. What did we learn today?

1171
01:19:48,239 --> 01:19:53,600
Humanity loves recycling, We love a
good story, we love like I

1172
01:19:53,600 --> 01:19:56,840
mean this is the hero's journey through
and through, right, it's the descent

1173
01:19:57,039 --> 01:20:00,520
and the return. It is that
is one of the ultimate thing about that.

1174
01:20:00,520 --> 01:20:02,840
The other day with just like creation
in general, and you know,

1175
01:20:02,920 --> 01:20:06,000
because you were telling me something about
how it was off mic, but it

1176
01:20:06,039 --> 01:20:11,359
was just like they found something that
maybe more proved we were in a simulation

1177
01:20:11,479 --> 01:20:14,720
because creation was like lazy or something. Oh, when you're not paying attention

1178
01:20:14,840 --> 01:20:19,720
to this experiment, it acts in
a pattern, right, but when you

1179
01:20:19,880 --> 01:20:23,720
start to pay attention to it,
it acts how you expect it to act.

1180
01:20:24,159 --> 01:20:26,600
But it is just like the double
slit experiment. Yeah, that's what

1181
01:20:26,680 --> 01:20:30,479
it is. That that has to
do with light particle behavior. Yeah,

1182
01:20:30,600 --> 01:20:35,800
so like in light is both a
wave and a particle. Yeah, so

1183
01:20:36,000 --> 01:20:42,119
like when you're observing it, it's
going to always act like a certain predictable

1184
01:20:42,119 --> 01:20:45,520
way. But like when it's not, they can like use quantum mechanics now

1185
01:20:45,560 --> 01:20:49,399
to unobserve the experiment but still observe
it. And like the light behaves differently,

1186
01:20:49,479 --> 01:20:53,560
and it behaves as a particle,
but under observation it behaves as a

1187
01:20:53,560 --> 01:20:58,439
wave. And it's I I'm not
going to try and get like into the

1188
01:20:58,520 --> 01:21:01,520
quantum mechanics of it. But yeah, it's it is a mind fuck our

1189
01:21:01,600 --> 01:21:04,520
understanding of So like in my mind, Jake, he goes home, he

1190
01:21:04,640 --> 01:21:08,760
just goes in the closet. I
just hang out there. But when he's

1191
01:21:08,800 --> 01:21:12,600
not turns off. But if he
looks, I'm just walking around doing home

1192
01:21:12,640 --> 01:21:15,000
stuff. That's a great one of
my favorite thirdy Roc lines from Tracy Jordan.

1193
01:21:15,079 --> 01:21:19,039
He's like, I'm Tracy Jordan.
Would I go to sleep? Nothing

1194
01:21:19,079 --> 01:21:26,119
in the world happens. But it's
just like we're both humanity is both like

1195
01:21:27,880 --> 01:21:38,479
obscenely creative and ingenuous or ingenious or
whatever the enuity. Yeah, but at

1196
01:21:38,479 --> 01:21:43,279
the same time so lazy and unoriginal. So it makes sense to me,

1197
01:21:43,359 --> 01:21:46,279
And if we're the universe experiencing itself, it makes sense to me that the

1198
01:21:46,399 --> 01:21:55,159
universe would be both this inexplicable and
original and incredible thing, but also really

1199
01:21:55,399 --> 01:21:59,000
like retold yeah, five people down
the line, I would. I would

1200
01:21:59,039 --> 01:22:01,880
honestly argue that if we are the
universe is experiencing itself, we're all resting

1201
01:22:01,880 --> 01:22:04,199
on our laurels at the end of
the day, right, Like, that's

1202
01:22:04,239 --> 01:22:08,399
that's just such a natural dance.
Well I did I did that remember that

1203
01:22:08,439 --> 01:22:12,359
one hit. I'm just gonna rewrite
that a bunch. Yeah, and we're

1204
01:22:12,399 --> 01:22:16,119
incredibly narcissistic and yeah we think with
the center of everything that's right, that's

1205
01:22:16,119 --> 01:22:21,840
absolutely right. But uh yeah,
what'd you guys learn today? Jesus is

1206
01:22:21,920 --> 01:22:27,760
Lord? Yeah, I mean that's
that's a fair lesson cart and aggregation,

1207
01:22:27,920 --> 01:22:30,239
recycling. That's what I said earlier. Yeah, Christianity is the fuck Jerry

1208
01:22:30,239 --> 01:22:35,199
of all really dope secret right religions. Can I tell you this as a

1209
01:22:35,199 --> 01:22:39,439
as a as a Catholic to a
Jew, No, No you can't.

1210
01:22:39,560 --> 01:22:43,560
I don't want to hear it.
And with that said, adapt or die,

1211
01:22:43,760 --> 01:22:48,000
Yeah pretty much. Yeah, Yeah, that false witness commandment, that

1212
01:22:48,000 --> 01:22:53,439
one's kind of lucy goosey these days
for us. But yeah, I think

1213
01:22:53,439 --> 01:22:55,920
the thing that I learned that was
so funny is like all of these ancient

1214
01:22:56,000 --> 01:23:00,520
ritual schools or just what frats are
based off of. Oh, get him

1215
01:23:00,520 --> 01:23:02,399
fucked up, throw him around in
the dark room, then you bring him

1216
01:23:02,439 --> 01:23:08,319
to the party. You did it. You gonna live forever. What do

1217
01:23:08,359 --> 01:23:11,279
you gotta be scared of? We
hate you for nine months, you're good

1218
01:23:11,680 --> 01:23:15,119
or nine weeks or whatever it is. Yeah, upload that consciousness. Yeah,

1219
01:23:15,119 --> 01:23:23,119
who's Hitler? Honestly? Religion?
Just in general, I would say

1220
01:23:23,119 --> 01:23:27,880
the guy that most of our issues
are all dated back to this made up

1221
01:23:27,920 --> 01:23:30,000
thing. Yeah, I think it
would totally if there was a Hitler.

1222
01:23:30,039 --> 01:23:32,399
It's probably the people that narked on
the dude that was just trying to party

1223
01:23:32,399 --> 01:23:38,039
on the Lucinian magic religions at whatever
you want it to be. All right,

1224
01:23:38,039 --> 01:23:42,960
fine, it's not religion. Then
it's people's sense of purpose. That's

1225
01:23:43,039 --> 01:23:47,399
Hitler, trying to find that you
mean something to this world, needing meaning,

1226
01:23:47,720 --> 01:23:50,800
need and meaning man Hitler, man
in search of his soul is Hitler.

1227
01:23:50,960 --> 01:23:56,079
Yes, look who who was trying
to find more meaning than Hitler did?

1228
01:23:56,239 --> 01:23:58,640
He was trying to find all the
meaning? Did I just like crack

1229
01:23:58,800 --> 01:24:02,359
the universe? Uh, your search
for humanity is actually the thing that's making

1230
01:24:02,399 --> 01:24:05,960
you less human every day, and
just race it, you know, just

1231
01:24:06,039 --> 01:24:11,760
kind of get in on the suck. Yeah, just be a little piggy

1232
01:24:12,439 --> 01:24:20,319
anyway. Yeah, there's no great
thing you're gonna do that's better than just

1233
01:24:20,399 --> 01:24:24,239
like having a nice day. Oh
No, that's the best thing you can

1234
01:24:24,319 --> 01:24:28,560
do. Joy the people you're around, Be pleasant, try not to hurt

1235
01:24:28,560 --> 01:24:30,600
anyone. And for Danner, Jester
and Rob Fox, I'm Jake Goldman.

1236
01:24:30,720 --> 01:24:31,760
You just got all served.