WEBVTT 1 00:00:03.240 --> 00:00:09.240 Ready. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, cause I'll be noticing that about 2 00:00:09.279 --> 00:00:13.439 me by myself too. Sometimes I'll be sitting back right, but I'll be 3 00:00:13.480 --> 00:00:15.960 trying to see, like I want to make sure it be looking good. 4 00:00:16.480 --> 00:00:19.879 I'm a little afraid for this because when I was at home, they popped 5 00:00:19.879 --> 00:00:26.399 out and I was like, that can't happen on camera. That can't happen 6 00:00:26.440 --> 00:00:35.240 on camera. It ain't that type of party. Ooh. Life is so 7 00:00:35.479 --> 00:00:42.479 real. Life is so real. Welcome back to the Black Girl Experience. 8 00:00:43.039 --> 00:00:52.520 I am your host, Jasmine Daniel. Life is so real because I had, 9 00:00:53.119 --> 00:00:55.439 of course, I kind of had a plan in my mind about what 10 00:00:55.479 --> 00:00:59.359 I wanted to talk about, but the universe came through like, oh, 11 00:00:59.399 --> 00:01:00.799 bitch, we gonna really talk about it, like we're gonna make some shit 12 00:01:00.920 --> 00:01:03.640 happen today, so you can really talk about it. Like you were just 13 00:01:03.640 --> 00:01:07.120 gonna come in here and play talk about it, Like no, we're gonna 14 00:01:07.159 --> 00:01:11.359 make some shit happen, so you can really talk about it. And like, 15 00:01:11.640 --> 00:01:14.040 just on the way here, I was just piecing all of this stuff 16 00:01:14.079 --> 00:01:18.640 together and I'm like, dog, the life is so fucking real. Life 17 00:01:18.719 --> 00:01:23.719 is so fuck real. So first of all, we were just trying to 18 00:01:23.719 --> 00:01:26.799 figure out what color to put behind me here. Y'all know, you know, 19 00:01:26.879 --> 00:01:30.799 I'm a purple girl. You know my favorite colors are purple and black. 20 00:01:30.799 --> 00:01:34.680 Off top is black. And then I had added I was so emo 21 00:01:34.920 --> 00:01:38.719 and just so dark, not not for real, but like I do, 22 00:01:38.760 --> 00:01:42.879 I just love black. This is the black girl experience. I love black. 23 00:01:45.200 --> 00:01:49.040 But at some point I'm like, I like purple and purple is symbolic 24 00:01:49.200 --> 00:01:53.799 of luxury royalty, you know what I'm saying. And I'm like, wow, 25 00:01:53.879 --> 00:01:59.519 So that became the colors of the podcast, black and purple. So 26 00:01:59.560 --> 00:02:00.519 today and I'm like, what color do I want? I'm like, I 27 00:02:00.560 --> 00:02:04.000 don't really fuck with these colors, but I feel like purple is my color. 28 00:02:04.040 --> 00:02:06.120 I'm like, fuck, let's do purple. But then I was looking 29 00:02:06.200 --> 00:02:08.639 at the blue and I'm like, the blue look good today. And then 30 00:02:08.680 --> 00:02:13.120 I also was like, nah, I'm on some throat chakra shit today. 31 00:02:13.280 --> 00:02:15.919 Like a lot of self expression, just a lot of expressing myself. And 32 00:02:15.919 --> 00:02:21.759 again that that is one of the things that I struggle with is which is 33 00:02:21.759 --> 00:02:24.439 crazy because I have a whole podcast and I talk my shit on here, 34 00:02:24.520 --> 00:02:30.879 but I do have a hard time expressing myself for whatever reason like that, 35 00:02:30.240 --> 00:02:34.280 and that's a part of my healing journey is learning how to express myself and 36 00:02:34.319 --> 00:02:39.520 really use my throat chakra. So throwt chakra blue, Okay, it's all 37 00:02:39.560 --> 00:02:46.759 about self expression today. So today was a motherfucking day. Like y'all know, 38 00:02:46.800 --> 00:02:49.879 I got a little note, I got Hella notes. But again, 39 00:02:49.960 --> 00:02:53.840 I'm probably only gonna touch on the bottom of what like just pretty much happened. 40 00:02:53.599 --> 00:02:59.000 And it's just so funny how it all come together. So I don't 41 00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:02.240 even know where I want to start. Like I was saying that I wanted 42 00:03:02.280 --> 00:03:05.960 to come on here, and like you know, I had an idea what 43 00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:07.719 I was gonna talk about. Oh, that's what I was saying. But 44 00:03:07.800 --> 00:03:12.400 the universe really made some shit happen for me to talk about. So I 45 00:03:12.479 --> 00:03:16.680 had put on my story today on Instagram when I was at work. I'm 46 00:03:16.719 --> 00:03:20.960 like, uh, I can't wait to get off work so I can go 47 00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:23.240 talk my shit. I got a lot of stuff to say. I'm like, 48 00:03:23.280 --> 00:03:27.759 I'm gonna be talking about toxic workplace. What else did I say? 49 00:03:27.800 --> 00:03:34.639 I said, toxic workplace, appreciating the season of life that you're in. 50 00:03:36.159 --> 00:03:45.199 Uh, I'm about to go listen on a love on the love what else, 51 00:03:45.240 --> 00:03:53.319 because I do want to just I'm just ready to so sh hurry up, 52 00:04:00.159 --> 00:04:14.560 appreciating hurry up. That'solations and boundaries and on business and all aspects of 53 00:04:15.800 --> 00:04:30.319 as a relationships the word okay. And then I had also took notes, 54 00:04:30.360 --> 00:04:32.199 and I said, I know I was talking about humanity and stuff or whatever, 55 00:04:32.879 --> 00:04:35.879 so all of that shit is just gonna come together. But okay, 56 00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:49.920 So I don't know where I wanna start with. The First of all, 57 00:04:49.920 --> 00:04:54.199 I knew that this episode was gonna be real ast fuck when I came in 58 00:04:54.240 --> 00:05:00.399 here because I cried today and I love that for me. I love that 59 00:05:00.560 --> 00:05:03.600 for me because you'll be having to let that shit out. And I didn't 60 00:05:04.519 --> 00:05:08.240 expect to cry to day, and I actually wish I could have cried some 61 00:05:08.279 --> 00:05:10.959 more. I wanted to cry some more, but I'm like, my eyes 62 00:05:11.000 --> 00:05:15.199 gonna be puffy, my fucking uh, I'm gonna fuck my lashes up. 63 00:05:15.319 --> 00:05:17.600 But at least I got some of that shit out, and I cry at 64 00:05:17.639 --> 00:05:20.879 work. I cried at fucking work. Oh, So that's where I was 65 00:05:20.879 --> 00:05:24.800 gonna go with it first, before I even like to let y'all know how 66 00:05:24.839 --> 00:05:29.800 divine this shit is. So you know, I be fucking with the angel 67 00:05:29.879 --> 00:05:31.120 numbers and not just the one, one, one to two, three, 68 00:05:31.160 --> 00:05:34.600 thy like I whatever numbers be hitting me, I'd be like, let me 69 00:05:34.600 --> 00:05:39.439 look that up and see what it's about. So which one did this one 70 00:05:39.480 --> 00:05:43.199 say something about work too? Okay? I just said that I was gonna 71 00:05:43.199 --> 00:05:46.839 talk about humanity too. One of the angel numbers that popped up before I 72 00:05:46.839 --> 00:05:55.639 got here was forty I mean, no, where's the other one? The 73 00:05:55.720 --> 00:06:00.600 first one was uh oh, seventy four to twenty one. So my toxic 74 00:06:00.680 --> 00:06:03.360 workplace and all of that. So I ended up looking up seventy four to 75 00:06:03.399 --> 00:06:08.279 twenty one before I came here. Is said that this first of all, 76 00:06:08.319 --> 00:06:13.439 this is a financial meaning that's big for me. I'm always heavy on finances. 77 00:06:13.800 --> 00:06:17.040 Seventy four to twenty one is meaningful when it comes to the workplace. 78 00:06:20.680 --> 00:06:25.360 I'm talking about what was it? A toxic workplace? I cry at work 79 00:06:25.399 --> 00:06:30.600 today. I can't make this shit up. It's meaningful when it comes to 80 00:06:30.600 --> 00:06:34.560 the workplace. Having vast knowledge is essential for success. So number seventy four 81 00:06:34.600 --> 00:06:39.759 to twenty one advises you to try different things. That way you will gain 82 00:06:39.800 --> 00:06:44.240 plenty of work experience, you will learn incredible lessons and improve your skills. 83 00:06:44.360 --> 00:06:48.399 Having a fresh perspective can make you more innovative and creative. These traits can 84 00:06:48.399 --> 00:06:53.639 help you solve your problems and achieve your success. Ultimately, number seventy four 85 00:06:53.639 --> 00:07:00.000 to twenty one tries to improve your career. What is something that I always 86 00:07:00.279 --> 00:07:03.680 talk about, y'all know another one of my biggest struggles in life is work 87 00:07:05.279 --> 00:07:12.000 because I see myself having a career creatively. I see a life of an 88 00:07:12.040 --> 00:07:16.680 abundance for me by doing what I love and living a fulfilling life. I 89 00:07:16.959 --> 00:07:24.680 struggle in the workplace because I don't belong there. Baby. I could sit 90 00:07:24.720 --> 00:07:28.199 here and do this all day for free. But guess what, I know 91 00:07:28.279 --> 00:07:30.879 the money is gonna come with this shit. Because bro, you telling me 92 00:07:30.920 --> 00:07:35.279 the money not gonna come with this This shit is so easy to me. 93 00:07:35.319 --> 00:07:41.600 Look at my smile. I do not look like this at work. However, 94 00:07:43.040 --> 00:07:46.000 one of the best things about me at my job that my manager told 95 00:07:46.000 --> 00:07:48.519 me today was like, you have so much charisma. Your energy is great, 96 00:07:48.639 --> 00:07:51.759 Like, we love you, know what I'm saying. They need that 97 00:07:51.879 --> 00:07:56.120 in there. On top of the fact that your performance has to be great 98 00:07:56.160 --> 00:08:03.560 too. But what really does it for them for me is my personality because 99 00:08:03.600 --> 00:08:07.839 we deal with a lot of bullshit in there, customer service. Dealing with 100 00:08:07.879 --> 00:08:15.399 customers, baby, you want to deal with somebody with personality. So that's 101 00:08:15.439 --> 00:08:22.519 one thing. What else did I let me see? The meaning of number 102 00:08:22.519 --> 00:08:26.600 seventy four to twenty one advises you to be bold, innovative and creative. 103 00:08:26.040 --> 00:08:31.079 Change can change, can show you a new perspective and transform your life. 104 00:08:31.240 --> 00:08:35.879 Remember these lessons the next time you see seventy four to twenty one. So, 105 00:08:39.000 --> 00:08:41.639 and the other one was about humanity. I'll get to that in a 106 00:08:41.639 --> 00:08:56.919 second. But so the toxic workplace I don't even know. So I'm getting 107 00:08:56.919 --> 00:09:05.399 to a point where my job is not really enjoyable. I think that one 108 00:09:05.440 --> 00:09:13.519 of the most important things in the workplace is that it should be enjoyable. 109 00:09:13.919 --> 00:09:16.240 It should be a pleasure to be here because I spend the majority of my 110 00:09:16.360 --> 00:09:22.519 time here. I gotta see y'all motherfuckers every day. I gotta show up 111 00:09:22.559 --> 00:09:26.360 and have a smile and give the best customers over. You know what I'm 112 00:09:26.360 --> 00:09:28.879 saying. Regardless of how people are treating me talking to me, you know 113 00:09:28.879 --> 00:09:33.559 what I'm saying, Like I gotta do this shit every day, right, 114 00:09:33.360 --> 00:09:37.360 so it should be enjoyable. But a part of that is making sure that 115 00:09:37.399 --> 00:09:41.559 the morale is high in that bitch. Y'all want me to be in here 116 00:09:41.679 --> 00:09:48.279 slaving for you, and y'all don't even make it enjoyable. It's hard to 117 00:09:48.320 --> 00:09:56.399 be productive when your job is not enjoyable, when it's not fulfilling, when 118 00:09:56.440 --> 00:09:58.200 you know what I'm saying, like, and of course, you gotta do 119 00:09:58.240 --> 00:10:01.519 what you gotta unders then everybody has to work at some point in their life 120 00:10:01.600 --> 00:10:03.320 or whatever you're playing it, Well, you know what I'm saying, some 121 00:10:03.360 --> 00:10:11.120 points you gotta work. But baby, when you a chosen one, that 122 00:10:11.200 --> 00:10:16.440 shit is so hard. It is so hard. Like I'm so ready to 123 00:10:16.440 --> 00:10:20.039 be past this point in my life. I feel like I've been talking about 124 00:10:20.039 --> 00:10:24.919 this shit for years. It's about to be six years for the podcast in 125 00:10:24.000 --> 00:10:28.080 January, like this is what I'm trying to tell it, like whatever, 126 00:10:28.240 --> 00:10:33.200 But I just know it's all a part of the journey. So yeah, 127 00:10:33.320 --> 00:10:37.720 just you know, just the regular stresses of a job, the fact that 128 00:10:37.759 --> 00:10:48.320 you're overworked and underpaid, the fact that people just don't respect you as a 129 00:10:48.360 --> 00:10:52.039 fucking human. Do you think I'm a fucking robot. Do you think that 130 00:10:52.080 --> 00:10:54.440 I don't have a family. Do you think that I don't have problems? 131 00:10:54.480 --> 00:10:56.960 Do you think that I don't have bills? Do you not think that I 132 00:10:56.000 --> 00:10:58.600 have to go take care of life outside of this bitch, Like I don't 133 00:10:58.600 --> 00:11:03.879 want to be here every day. At the same time, I have things 134 00:11:03.879 --> 00:11:07.960 that I have to take care of outside of this in my real fucking life, 135 00:11:09.080 --> 00:11:15.240 And y'all don't have just no consideration for that, no respect for that, 136 00:11:16.759 --> 00:11:20.919 and it shows and how you treat your employees, that's a problem for 137 00:11:20.039 --> 00:11:24.919 me, you know what I'm saying. So again the morale is very oh, 138 00:11:26.000 --> 00:11:30.000 y'all, no bunshit in this bitch. Y'all treat me like a slave, 139 00:11:30.639 --> 00:11:33.879 you know what I'm saying. It really weighs on you. So when 140 00:11:33.240 --> 00:11:39.039 I'm not showing up and giving my best performance, it becomes a problem for 141 00:11:39.120 --> 00:11:48.840 you. But I have problems with this job so today, like so it's 142 00:11:48.879 --> 00:11:54.879 just been you know, a number of things getting up until this point. 143 00:11:56.000 --> 00:12:05.000 So on top of that that you have like the fact I don't like that 144 00:12:05.480 --> 00:12:07.120 at a lot of job, well, I don't know some of my jobs 145 00:12:07.159 --> 00:12:11.799 like they have actual training processes where people come out with a binder on your 146 00:12:11.799 --> 00:12:13.799 first day and be like, hey, this is really the process, Like 147 00:12:13.840 --> 00:12:16.639 we really have a whole process. Sometimes you get to a job and it's 148 00:12:16.679 --> 00:12:18.200 like, okay, just watch this person for a day and this is what 149 00:12:18.240 --> 00:12:28.559 it is. Okay, Okay, So you know what I'm saying. You 150 00:12:28.639 --> 00:12:31.559 learn how to do things, and hey, this is how it is. 151 00:12:31.639 --> 00:12:35.759 Right, there's no real training process in here, so keep that in mind 152 00:12:35.799 --> 00:12:41.320 as well. Then you just have the fact that it's a toxic work environment, 153 00:12:41.519 --> 00:12:43.720 you know what I'm saying. I don't know if you work amongst a 154 00:12:43.720 --> 00:12:48.080 lot of older people or younger people, like that makes a difference. And 155 00:12:48.120 --> 00:12:52.279 it's so crazy because I've been on both sides of the fence where it's a 156 00:12:52.320 --> 00:12:56.519 toxic working environment with old people hating on you because you're the youngest in that 157 00:12:56.639 --> 00:12:58.080 bitch. But if you're in there with a whole bunch of people that are 158 00:12:58.120 --> 00:13:03.120 your peers or younger than you, that could be crazy too, you know 159 00:13:03.159 --> 00:13:09.240 what I'm saying. And then don't be the pretty quiet, unproblematic girl at 160 00:13:09.320 --> 00:13:13.639 work, because that's a problem too. So it's like, bro, it's 161 00:13:13.240 --> 00:13:18.240 oh and I hate and when I think about this and saying it out loud. 162 00:13:18.600 --> 00:13:22.480 I never want to make it seem like damn, somebody always hating on 163 00:13:22.519 --> 00:13:26.600 you or it all like no, because I take accountability in all my situations. 164 00:13:26.600 --> 00:13:28.600 But you also got to understand that when you're a solid individual, like 165 00:13:28.679 --> 00:13:33.600 people just hate on you and that shit is crazy to me. So that 166 00:13:35.200 --> 00:13:41.320 what else? So many things had So I had a conversation after my shift 167 00:13:41.360 --> 00:13:46.240 today with my manager and we did talk about my performance and all of that, 168 00:13:46.360 --> 00:13:52.039 and he asked me, he said, is it is it personal or 169 00:13:52.200 --> 00:13:56.679 is it the work? Is it the workplace? And I'm like, it's 170 00:13:56.759 --> 00:14:01.159 both. It's both, Like you know what I'm saying, It's just all 171 00:14:01.200 --> 00:14:05.519 of these things going on. And so he was just like, you know, 172 00:14:05.759 --> 00:14:07.240 just saying like, well, it's about to be a new year whatever, 173 00:14:07.519 --> 00:14:11.080 da da da da, just I guess given that advice or whatever. 174 00:14:11.679 --> 00:14:13.559 But then it was just asking me, like, well, what is it? 175 00:14:13.720 --> 00:14:16.799 I said that it was both. I addressed a lot of I addressed 176 00:14:18.080 --> 00:14:20.799 all of those things in the workplace, the toxic workplace, the messy people. 177 00:14:22.600 --> 00:14:26.039 I had to address the fact that I'm like, you have racist employees. 178 00:14:28.559 --> 00:14:31.480 He was like, are you sick? Dead ass. I'm like, 179 00:14:31.480 --> 00:14:35.480 if you don't believe me, ask the people in this bitch, Like you 180 00:14:35.600 --> 00:14:43.320 have racist employees that had to be addressed, like just other just toxic shit 181 00:14:43.559 --> 00:14:46.039 with them. BLA. I'm like, bro, all of this stuff, 182 00:14:46.200 --> 00:14:50.960 all of this stuff. So again, it's the workplace, but also hell 183 00:14:52.039 --> 00:14:54.759 yeah, I got a whole personal life in this bitch outside of it, 184 00:14:54.879 --> 00:14:58.720 And that's what I'm trying to say. Y'all have no regard for that. 185 00:15:01.200 --> 00:15:03.559 And I'm not a person that's just come to work, Like first of all, 186 00:15:03.600 --> 00:15:05.639 I'm not a person that's gonna take work home and I'm not gonna bring 187 00:15:07.559 --> 00:15:09.480 whatever I got going on at home to work. But at the end of 188 00:15:09.519 --> 00:15:13.320 the day, like you gotta understand that that's going on. You know what 189 00:15:13.360 --> 00:15:18.440 I'm saying, And I've said on this podcast many many times, like I'm 190 00:15:18.440 --> 00:15:22.679 a very strong person. Motherfuckers think you don't be shit wrong with me, 191 00:15:22.720 --> 00:15:26.799 and I'd be like, y'all don't even know, like I be going through 192 00:15:26.840 --> 00:15:35.320 it. And that that's another thing about social media, Like I'm not a 193 00:15:35.360 --> 00:15:39.639 motherfucker at pretend like it ain't shit right, Like it ain't shit wrong with 194 00:15:39.720 --> 00:15:45.639 me, It ain't like and maybe it's not. And again, I feel 195 00:15:45.720 --> 00:15:48.840 like, you know, no everybody posts their highlight reel on social media. 196 00:15:48.879 --> 00:15:50.960 You know what I'm saying, nobody's gonna be on the internet, like I 197 00:15:50.960 --> 00:15:52.720 got X, Y and Z going on, But a lot of people just 198 00:15:52.759 --> 00:15:58.000 be acting like, ain't shit wrong, and that's cool, But stay over 199 00:15:58.039 --> 00:16:00.879 there. I got real life shit going on. You know, I'm a 200 00:16:00.919 --> 00:16:07.320 real fucking person, And the only way that I can deal with that is 201 00:16:07.399 --> 00:16:15.039 by expressing myself about talking about it, about letting it out. I'm a 202 00:16:15.240 --> 00:16:18.840 very emotional person by nature. I'm a Pisces. I don't give a like 203 00:16:19.080 --> 00:16:22.559 I know a lot of I know a lot of people don't believe in astrology. 204 00:16:22.679 --> 00:16:26.159 But even before I got deep into birth charts and all of that and 205 00:16:26.200 --> 00:16:30.720 all the different placements in your chart, always knew just me being a Pisces, 206 00:16:30.799 --> 00:16:33.799 I'm like, bro, like, I'm really an emotional person, Like 207 00:16:33.080 --> 00:16:40.320 I feel on a very deep level and that's a strength, but it's also 208 00:16:40.360 --> 00:16:45.480 a weakness for real, Like I'm really a fucking Pisc's. I'm super dreamy, 209 00:16:45.879 --> 00:16:52.279 super intuitive, like a very spiritual person I like, and I'm like, 210 00:16:52.320 --> 00:16:56.559 I just feel very deeply for real, like I'm a very passionate person, 211 00:16:56.039 --> 00:17:00.840 so that shit, yeah, I don't even know. I just lost 212 00:17:00.840 --> 00:17:06.279 my train of thought with that. But oh, I was saying, like 213 00:17:06.640 --> 00:17:10.880 people be acting like they don't go through shit or were like, yeah, 214 00:17:10.960 --> 00:17:14.359 I go through shit, and I'd be having to let that shit out. 215 00:17:14.599 --> 00:17:22.920 And again, I feel like the podcast is my outlet. It's like really 216 00:17:22.960 --> 00:17:26.799 one of my only outlets. And I think that again, I said that 217 00:17:26.920 --> 00:17:30.240 I feel like a lot of people be like it don't never be shit wrong 218 00:17:30.279 --> 00:17:33.000 with you. You just hold everything together. You're a strong person, like 219 00:17:33.119 --> 00:17:45.119 because I hold a lot in you know what I'm saying, like, and 220 00:17:45.160 --> 00:17:53.759 I've always known that that's not good. But also like I feel like just 221 00:17:53.839 --> 00:17:59.880 dealing with shit and just like compartmentalizing it all and just putting it like you 222 00:18:00.440 --> 00:18:03.599 trying to hold it together. So yeah, like you start to become strong, 223 00:18:04.839 --> 00:18:10.519 but also you have to release that stuff. So I cried today. 224 00:18:10.680 --> 00:18:12.000 I cried at work when I was talking to my manager, and not like 225 00:18:12.039 --> 00:18:15.559 a oh my god, like not a crazy cry, but it was like 226 00:18:15.599 --> 00:18:18.359 one of them cries where like you put your hand over your face and like 227 00:18:18.400 --> 00:18:22.440 the tears is flowing down, and he was just kind of looking at me. 228 00:18:22.519 --> 00:18:25.799 But it was like, oh, this is a deep cry cause he 229 00:18:25.839 --> 00:18:27.920 asked me, is it personal or is it work? And I said it's 230 00:18:27.960 --> 00:18:34.359 both and that's triggering when it's like you have so much shit going on, 231 00:18:36.079 --> 00:18:40.559 it's like this is all I can do. And he was like damn. 232 00:18:40.839 --> 00:18:42.799 And then he asking me like, so what can I do for you? 233 00:18:45.599 --> 00:18:49.279 Amazing question, great, great, great question to hear. You know what 234 00:18:49.279 --> 00:18:52.839 I'm saying, what can I do for you? Honestly, it ain't shit 235 00:18:52.960 --> 00:18:56.519 you can do for me, sir, you know what I'm saying. I 236 00:18:56.559 --> 00:19:00.119 wanted to be like, give me some motherfucking money, like on some city 237 00:19:00.359 --> 00:19:03.960 shit, like for real, that'll really help some shit. But of course 238 00:19:03.000 --> 00:19:07.079 I didn't say that. But other than that, like it's not really shit 239 00:19:07.160 --> 00:19:08.240 that he can do for me, you know what I'm saying. But I 240 00:19:08.279 --> 00:19:15.240 appreciate the gesture, the question whatever, you know what I'm saying. But 241 00:19:15.400 --> 00:19:21.599 yeah, it's a lot so and of course niggas came up with a whole 242 00:19:21.599 --> 00:19:26.640 action plan about whatever job and all of that, but it just it was 243 00:19:26.680 --> 00:19:29.799 a very real moment for me. I was happy that I got to cry 244 00:19:29.839 --> 00:19:33.799 today. I was happy that I got to let that shit out because I 245 00:19:33.839 --> 00:19:37.440 am dealing with a lot. I am going, man, and that's the 246 00:19:37.480 --> 00:19:45.400 thing, so appreciating the season of life that you're in right now. I 247 00:19:45.519 --> 00:19:47.720 be thinking about this like the other day I was thinking about it. I 248 00:19:47.759 --> 00:19:52.480 was like, Jazmine, you have to learn, like, hut, I'm 249 00:19:52.480 --> 00:19:55.240 trying to think. Do I really think like I'm just like a super big 250 00:19:55.279 --> 00:19:59.400 complainer. I don't think that I am, but I do notice that every 251 00:19:59.440 --> 00:20:03.279 time I get to a different phase in my life, I see when I'm 252 00:20:03.319 --> 00:20:06.759 complaining and I'm like, Jasmine, this is where you wanted. I remember 253 00:20:06.759 --> 00:20:08.119 when I prayed for days like this. I remember when I was like I 254 00:20:08.160 --> 00:20:11.680 can't wait to be in Texas and that, like you know what I'm saying, 255 00:20:11.440 --> 00:20:15.759 every day I do wake up and I express gratitude for being here. 256 00:20:15.400 --> 00:20:18.240 I love being here. I'm happy being here, but it's all of the 257 00:20:18.279 --> 00:20:22.079 shit around me that just makes it be like you know what I'm saying, 258 00:20:22.519 --> 00:20:27.319 And I really have to bring myself out of that and be like, Jasmine, 259 00:20:27.319 --> 00:20:30.680 you need to be looking at the good shit, don't look at the 260 00:20:30.759 --> 00:20:36.440 problems. But it's hard because the problems be on your ass like some fucking 261 00:20:36.599 --> 00:20:41.200 panties like get off, like the problems be crazy. But you know what 262 00:20:41.240 --> 00:20:42.839 I'm saying, you just really got to learn how to change your perspective. 263 00:20:45.039 --> 00:20:52.480 I one of the most important things for me, especially during this time. 264 00:20:52.559 --> 00:20:57.000 So this is said to be like the seasonal depression season. A lot of 265 00:20:57.000 --> 00:21:03.920 people be depressed around these times, around the holidays. Money don't be right, 266 00:21:03.359 --> 00:21:07.720 all these fake ass pagan holidays that y'all break, y'all fucking next for 267 00:21:08.160 --> 00:21:11.680 all of this shit whatever, you know what I'm saying, It's still just 268 00:21:11.160 --> 00:21:15.119 everyday life. And then the fact that the sun goes down earlier, you 269 00:21:15.119 --> 00:21:18.039 know what I'm saying, all of that, the weather change, like, 270 00:21:18.200 --> 00:21:23.720 it gets to be a very depressive time. So again, just lost my 271 00:21:23.720 --> 00:21:30.519 train of thought. I be mad. So it's a crazy time. It's 272 00:21:30.559 --> 00:21:37.119 a really crazy time. I don't know where I was about to go with 273 00:21:37.160 --> 00:21:38.440 that. I was really about to uh, I was really about to hit 274 00:21:38.440 --> 00:21:44.160 on something with that. I don't know. But let's see, because again 275 00:21:44.200 --> 00:21:52.920 I have so much stuff on here. Oh what do you do when you're 276 00:21:52.920 --> 00:22:00.680 in a dark place? So I was saying that I know that this is 277 00:22:00.759 --> 00:22:06.119 the time of seasonal depression, but also I have moments where I catch myself. 278 00:22:07.799 --> 00:22:10.440 Like, you know, you have those days where you're super high energy, 279 00:22:10.519 --> 00:22:12.160 you want to wake up and work out, you're feeling good. Like 280 00:22:12.200 --> 00:22:15.880 some days you just wake up and be like, damn, I feel good 281 00:22:15.880 --> 00:22:18.119 as fun today today. But some days you wake up and you just don't 282 00:22:18.119 --> 00:22:22.000 be feeling it, you know what I'm saying. Some days you wake up 283 00:22:22.039 --> 00:22:25.000 thinking about your fucking problem. Some days you wake up like, damn, 284 00:22:25.000 --> 00:22:27.279 I gotta do x x X. Damn you wake up you got this going 285 00:22:27.319 --> 00:22:30.119 on, You got this going on, you got a tax coming from everywhere, 286 00:22:30.119 --> 00:22:33.000 You got all this, you know what I'm saying. Some days you 287 00:22:33.039 --> 00:22:36.279 wake up like, damn, can I catch a break on top of the 288 00:22:36.319 --> 00:22:40.519 fact that again you might have to go to a job that you don't like, 289 00:22:41.480 --> 00:22:44.000 you know what I'm saying. So whatever it is that you're dealing with 290 00:22:44.200 --> 00:22:48.359 is like, you gotta be able to acknowledge when you're in that dark place 291 00:22:48.160 --> 00:22:52.359 and how the fuck do you get out of there? The main thing is 292 00:22:52.480 --> 00:22:57.119 acknowledging when you're in that dark place, cause you can you can spiral, 293 00:22:57.720 --> 00:23:03.960 you can fucking spire. You gotta catch yourself, You gotta catch your thoughts. 294 00:23:04.079 --> 00:23:08.160 You gotta bring it me. You gotta really back end my boy, 295 00:23:08.240 --> 00:23:12.680 like, hey, you about to go off the DPN, like for real. 296 00:23:14.319 --> 00:23:18.559 So I noticed that. I'm like, you know, on certain days, 297 00:23:18.559 --> 00:23:22.200 it just be like you're really going there, You're really in your head. 298 00:23:22.359 --> 00:23:26.480 It's okay, you know what I'm saying, And just depending on what 299 00:23:26.519 --> 00:23:29.319 you're dealing with. And that's why when he was asking me, is it 300 00:23:29.359 --> 00:23:33.119 work or is it really really to me? In my mind, It's like, 301 00:23:33.160 --> 00:23:36.000 I don't give a fuck about work. I care about the real shit 302 00:23:36.240 --> 00:23:40.559 that I gotta deal with every when I go home, my real life shit, 303 00:23:40.680 --> 00:23:42.640 you know what I'm saying, The stuff that's in my immediate fucking circle, 304 00:23:44.400 --> 00:23:47.839 the shit that's in my everyday life, the shit that I really have 305 00:23:47.920 --> 00:23:51.359 to deal with when I go home and lay down in my bed at night. 306 00:23:51.400 --> 00:23:53.240 What is the last thing on my mind. Not that motherfucking job. 307 00:23:55.160 --> 00:24:00.359 It's about what's going on here. And that's the thing, you know. 308 00:24:00.680 --> 00:24:04.960 I feel like I talk about people dealing with demons internally, you know what 309 00:24:06.000 --> 00:24:08.599 I'm saying, Like, you don't know what a person is dealing with, 310 00:24:11.079 --> 00:24:15.640 what's in their mind, was in their heart, was in the soul, 311 00:24:15.920 --> 00:24:18.559 think about all the shit that you don't Again, I said, I was 312 00:24:18.559 --> 00:24:22.680 so happy that I cried. I was able to release, I was able 313 00:24:22.720 --> 00:24:25.559 to let some shit go. Today, think about all of the shit that 314 00:24:25.599 --> 00:24:30.400 you hold inside, all of the thoughts that you hold in your mind. 315 00:24:30.839 --> 00:24:33.400 And baby, people be thinking some crazy stuff, but even still, it's 316 00:24:33.480 --> 00:24:37.559 just like all the shit on your mind. Just think about if you think 317 00:24:37.599 --> 00:24:45.039 about all of your problems, that shit manifests in your physical world, all 318 00:24:45.079 --> 00:24:48.000 of you. If all that you're thinking about is your problems, how does 319 00:24:48.039 --> 00:24:52.920 that manifest in your world? If you holding on to shit in your heart, 320 00:24:53.680 --> 00:24:57.359 if you holding grudges in your heart, if you whatever, you know 321 00:24:57.400 --> 00:25:00.200 what I'm saying, Whatever you've been through in your life that was traumatic is 322 00:25:00.920 --> 00:25:07.319 shit. That's like, damn, that's my heart. Imagine if a person 323 00:25:07.319 --> 00:25:12.680 got hate in their heart and they hold on to that shit inside. Again, 324 00:25:12.759 --> 00:25:17.319 we're not even talking about work. We're talking about again. This is 325 00:25:17.319 --> 00:25:22.000 what I'm saying. Is it is it personal or is it work? It's 326 00:25:22.039 --> 00:25:26.240 both. But when you think about the shit that's going on internally, people 327 00:25:26.319 --> 00:25:36.240 be talking at mental health shit. Are you okay? Are you okay? 328 00:25:37.039 --> 00:25:40.000 Are you okay? My eyes look glossy as fusal. You could tell I 329 00:25:40.039 --> 00:25:45.039 was crat Why shit look glossy? So you gotta let that shit out, 330 00:25:45.160 --> 00:25:53.440 bro Like, So realizing when you're in that dark space and pulling yourself out. 331 00:25:53.440 --> 00:25:57.160 I think for me, it's just like, I don't know if y'all 332 00:25:57.160 --> 00:26:02.000 talk to y'allselves, I talk to myself. I gotta consult the realist nigga 333 00:26:02.000 --> 00:26:03.920 in the room. I gotta have one on one with me. If you 334 00:26:03.920 --> 00:26:07.079 don't talk to yourself, I think that you're crazy. You don't have conversations 335 00:26:07.119 --> 00:26:10.680 with yourself in the mirror. You don't be giving yourself pep talks, you 336 00:26:10.680 --> 00:26:12.680 don't be like Jazmine, what's wrong with you? Like, if you don't 337 00:26:12.680 --> 00:26:21.559 talk to you, I talk to myself for sure. So yeah, that's 338 00:26:21.680 --> 00:26:26.319 what happened with work. And so that angel number was very just on point 339 00:26:26.440 --> 00:26:44.920 for me. We all have struggles in life. We all have struggles, 340 00:26:48.480 --> 00:26:52.720 and I feel like if you feel like you ain't got no type of struggle. 341 00:26:52.799 --> 00:26:55.480 First of all, if you feel like you ain't got no type of 342 00:26:55.519 --> 00:27:00.839 struggle in your life, you're lying. That's number one. Number two, 343 00:27:03.240 --> 00:27:07.839 if you can't acknowledge the fact that you struggle with something. I don't even 344 00:27:07.880 --> 00:27:14.440 want to talk to you because we all have struggles. We're all struggling with 345 00:27:14.599 --> 00:27:21.759 something. So if you can't even acknowledge that, I don't know, you 346 00:27:21.759 --> 00:27:23.799 know what I'm saying. Your struggle looks different than mine. But we all 347 00:27:23.839 --> 00:27:29.880 have a struggle, so whatever that may be. Like am I struggle with 348 00:27:29.920 --> 00:27:37.039 communication. I struggle with giving and receiving love. I struggle with selfishness. 349 00:27:37.480 --> 00:27:41.319 I struggle with I don't know, finances, with money management, like you 350 00:27:41.400 --> 00:28:04.119 struggle with something. Everybody has a struggle. I struggle with food. Let 351 00:28:04.160 --> 00:28:07.440 me, let me, let me bring this in. Let me let me 352 00:28:07.480 --> 00:28:10.839 bring this in because I ain't gonna I love food, Okay, I love 353 00:28:10.920 --> 00:28:21.519 food. But it's very important to be health conscious if you're a spiritual person, 354 00:28:21.640 --> 00:28:26.000 because that's the only way that you can hear God. That's the only 355 00:28:26.000 --> 00:28:30.119 way that you can hear the God within you is by being health conscious. 356 00:28:30.240 --> 00:28:34.319 So when people be on the internet to making jokes about low vibrational plates like 357 00:28:34.559 --> 00:28:38.000 that, shit lowers your vibration, that like, you can't hear God with 358 00:28:38.119 --> 00:28:45.400 you can't you can't hear God on that. So that's something that I struggle 359 00:28:45.440 --> 00:28:51.000 with. But I know that everything would be so much more clearer if I 360 00:28:51.079 --> 00:28:56.559 really got on my ship. As far as being health conscious, that's something 361 00:28:56.559 --> 00:29:00.880 that I struggle with but okay, and again that's me acknowledging it though, 362 00:29:02.039 --> 00:29:07.119 right and then taking the proper steps to change that. But again, if 363 00:29:07.119 --> 00:29:22.680 you can't acknowledge that you struggle with something, that's a problem. So yeah, 364 00:29:22.079 --> 00:29:33.519 I was very vulnerable today. I'm being very transparent on here. I 365 00:29:33.519 --> 00:29:45.920 think that's a very great trait to have those to be vulnerable. Like I 366 00:29:45.920 --> 00:29:49.480 don't like to go deep into like celebrity shit and stuff like that, but 367 00:29:51.319 --> 00:29:59.000 I really I felt a little triggered today for my homegirl, for Cardi B 368 00:30:00.680 --> 00:30:06.559 because I was on TikTok and I guess she had went live on Instagram and 369 00:30:07.039 --> 00:30:14.680 was like going the fuck off about Offset And I love Offset, I love 370 00:30:14.720 --> 00:30:18.480 a migos, I love the music. And I was thinking about this in 371 00:30:18.519 --> 00:30:22.519 the shower. I was thinking about this in the shower about you. Sometimes 372 00:30:22.559 --> 00:30:27.480 I don't know, I do think like I used to think that it was 373 00:30:27.559 --> 00:30:33.720 hard to separate the music from a person, but it's very important. I 374 00:30:33.799 --> 00:30:40.640 think it's very important to do that, Like, especially with the way the 375 00:30:40.680 --> 00:30:45.839 celebrity world is now like people are separating the music from the person. But 376 00:30:47.000 --> 00:30:51.640 yeah, she was going off about offset. You know, I saw something 377 00:30:51.680 --> 00:30:55.559 the other day that she was saying, like they're no longer together. I'm 378 00:30:55.640 --> 00:30:59.319 assuming that they're just separated right now or whatever. He popped out with a 379 00:30:59.359 --> 00:31:03.880 new cheek whatever. But on the line, she was just going off talking 380 00:31:03.920 --> 00:31:10.720 about how he's made a fucking full of her the entire time that they've been 381 00:31:10.759 --> 00:31:17.000 together, and she said that he was ungrateful, like I guess just never 382 00:31:17.039 --> 00:31:18.960 showed thanks for the way that she supported him and all of that. And 383 00:31:21.240 --> 00:31:23.319 hate to make it a bashing nigga moment, but I just I was thinking 384 00:31:23.319 --> 00:31:27.880 about this. It brought me back just as a woman, and I felt 385 00:31:27.920 --> 00:31:33.200 her past like cause she was really going off on that video, like you 386 00:31:33.240 --> 00:31:36.559 could hear it in her voice, you could hear the pain in her voice. 387 00:31:36.559 --> 00:31:40.119 And I was like, niggas, just don't be giving a fuck about 388 00:31:40.279 --> 00:31:42.759 us, bro, That shit is crazy to me. So it's like she's 389 00:31:42.759 --> 00:31:48.160 saying all of this, but I felt it as a woman because it's like, 390 00:31:48.720 --> 00:31:49.759 again, I said, he popped out with some chick as I'm a 391 00:31:49.799 --> 00:31:53.519 ven or whatever and It's like she was on there saying, like he know 392 00:31:53.599 --> 00:31:56.359 that I'm in the house. He know I'm not doing nothing. He knows 393 00:31:56.359 --> 00:31:59.880 that I'm not an easy woman. You know, she gonna be at the 394 00:31:59.880 --> 00:32:04.079 create with her kids problem, you know what I'm saying. And again being 395 00:32:04.160 --> 00:32:07.079 Cardi B. It's not a lot of people that she could just go out 396 00:32:07.119 --> 00:32:09.680 and be with. She could, but on some real shit, she's her. 397 00:32:10.039 --> 00:32:13.759 She's that girl. So it's not a lot of people that she could 398 00:32:13.759 --> 00:32:16.279 go be with. A dude is gonna run and be with a million chicks, 399 00:32:16.519 --> 00:32:20.359 you know what I'm saying. But guess what, none of them girls 400 00:32:20.440 --> 00:32:23.720 is Cardi B. And I'm bringing it back to me like as a woman, 401 00:32:24.519 --> 00:32:30.039 because you know how that shit feels to be a good woman to a 402 00:32:30.160 --> 00:32:34.640 man. And it's like, yeah, you could go on and you know 403 00:32:34.720 --> 00:32:39.480 whatever, go live your life, but you could be again, you could 404 00:32:39.519 --> 00:32:44.160 be with a million women, but you're not gonna find another good woman like 405 00:32:44.279 --> 00:32:45.640 me. Not. I don't want to say that you can, you know 406 00:32:45.720 --> 00:32:49.880 what I'm saying, That people could change or whatever, but you're not gonna 407 00:32:50.000 --> 00:32:52.759 You're not gonna find a lot of good women, is the point I'm trying 408 00:32:52.799 --> 00:32:55.799 to make you know what I'm saying. So it was just fucked up because 409 00:32:55.880 --> 00:33:00.759 like and again I had to go into the celebrity but even like the Tianna 410 00:33:00.759 --> 00:33:06.359 Taylor situation and all of that, like men really be jealous of women, 411 00:33:06.400 --> 00:33:08.359 and that's that's the only way that they could get back at you when you 412 00:33:08.440 --> 00:33:12.240 a good woman is to cheat on you or try to you know what I'm 413 00:33:12.240 --> 00:33:15.359 saying, or degrade you or disrespect you and just do all that crazy, 414 00:33:15.519 --> 00:33:20.640 foul dumb shit got people out here looking like why would you embarrass me like 415 00:33:20.720 --> 00:33:25.519 that? Bro? Just so as a woman, I feel for my girl, 416 00:33:25.559 --> 00:33:31.200 Like that's fucked up. That's fucked up. And you just look at 417 00:33:31.240 --> 00:33:36.440 all of this shit, well all of these again, like all of these 418 00:33:36.440 --> 00:33:45.960 different situations where like the real character of people are being exposed and at some 419 00:33:46.079 --> 00:33:50.359 point you gotta separate the music from the person, like damn, you're really 420 00:33:50.440 --> 00:33:55.319 just a terrible person. And it ain't get that deep for him. You 421 00:33:55.319 --> 00:34:01.480 know, it's other celebrities too, But it's just like that shit is very 422 00:34:01.519 --> 00:34:13.519 wild to me. There was another Angel number and I was talking about humanity, 423 00:34:13.599 --> 00:34:27.719 what else let's see And that's the thing too with humanity. Let's go 424 00:34:27.800 --> 00:34:36.960 okay, let's go see what I said about that, and it's so funny, 425 00:34:37.159 --> 00:34:38.440 and I did. I talked to my homegirl Tammy today. Shout out 426 00:34:38.440 --> 00:34:43.320 to Tammy cause I'll talk to her about that work shit on the phone, 427 00:34:43.440 --> 00:34:45.880 you know, cause I was like, I she had text me, and 428 00:34:45.920 --> 00:34:49.920 I'm like, what did I say? I said, I let me see 429 00:34:49.920 --> 00:34:53.239 what I said to her. I said, I have a really bad feeling 430 00:34:53.360 --> 00:34:59.719 right now, like my stomach was in knots, Like so just that whole 431 00:35:00.519 --> 00:35:08.079 work situation or whatever, but hold on, let me see. So the 432 00:35:08.119 --> 00:35:13.280 whole humanity thing, I don't know, maybe a couple of weeks ago or 433 00:35:13.320 --> 00:35:19.840 something, my friend Tammy had sent me like this little I don't even know 434 00:35:19.840 --> 00:35:24.519 what to call it kind of like a personality test type thing for careers, 435 00:35:25.239 --> 00:35:29.760 and so, like, you know, she was talking about how she scored 436 00:35:29.800 --> 00:35:30.559 on it or whatever, and she was like, you should take it, 437 00:35:30.559 --> 00:35:34.360 and I'm like, so we both like we already know what it's gonna say, 438 00:35:34.400 --> 00:35:36.519 like you know what I'm saying, and ours were very similar. But 439 00:35:37.000 --> 00:35:43.360 I took it and it came out like it was like zero percent for anything 440 00:35:43.440 --> 00:35:46.559 work for real, and it was just like all creative, just all creative, 441 00:35:46.559 --> 00:35:49.480 and that's what I'm saying, that's what I know about myself. And 442 00:35:49.480 --> 00:35:54.599 it had also said something about so it gave me like creative art type jobs, 443 00:35:54.639 --> 00:35:58.199 all of that type of stuff. But it had also said something about 444 00:35:58.280 --> 00:36:04.000 like being a humanitarian and so again like I really feel like my purpose here 445 00:36:04.039 --> 00:36:09.920 on this earth is to serve and again to be a light for the world 446 00:36:09.960 --> 00:36:15.079 and to be on some humanitarian shit because we don't have that in the fucking 447 00:36:15.119 --> 00:36:20.360 world. When you look at the state of the world, this shit is 448 00:36:20.480 --> 00:36:23.159 going to shit. This shit is going straight to hell, and I don't 449 00:36:23.199 --> 00:36:29.719 want no fucking parts of it. And I feel like that's why I am 450 00:36:29.760 --> 00:36:31.320 the way that I am. That's why I am the person that I am. 451 00:36:31.480 --> 00:36:37.360 Like, that's why I try to bring that goodness wherever I go, 452 00:36:37.519 --> 00:36:42.719 you know what I'm saying, and keep that light flowing all around the room, 453 00:36:42.840 --> 00:36:47.719 because that shit is not there. It's not there in the world, 454 00:36:47.960 --> 00:36:53.039 and that shit is scary to me. Like this how we live in. 455 00:36:53.320 --> 00:36:57.960 This is how we live in, Like this is really how we're living. 456 00:36:58.000 --> 00:37:05.840 So okay, so Angel number forty two ten, you will live longer. 457 00:37:05.920 --> 00:37:09.920 Okay, It looked like it looking younger every day, got that Benjamin Buddon 458 00:37:10.000 --> 00:37:15.960 period. So if you're seeing this angel number, it is a good sign. 459 00:37:15.119 --> 00:37:21.679 Don't worry. Angels are sending you the right message. Therefore, be 460 00:37:21.840 --> 00:37:27.079 kind to people. It makes them feel special and loved. Furthermore, the 461 00:37:27.159 --> 00:37:31.079 angels assure you that goodness travels far and wide. Also, being kind will 462 00:37:31.199 --> 00:37:37.599 enable you to learn to tolerate it. Number forty two ten is a symbol 463 00:37:37.679 --> 00:37:45.159 of hard work, compassion, enjoy. It relates to the act of kindness 464 00:37:45.199 --> 00:37:49.679 to humanity. In this case, you should do well in the community. 465 00:37:51.599 --> 00:37:54.960 Round at y'all. I'm in the community, okay. However, self determination 466 00:37:55.119 --> 00:38:00.239 and discipline our vital in helping others. This act makes you warm person. 467 00:38:00.840 --> 00:38:07.079 Let me see what else? Mmm. It's saying that I have complete support 468 00:38:07.119 --> 00:38:09.360 and protection from my angels, my spirit, guys, my ancestors, all 469 00:38:09.360 --> 00:38:15.000 of that. The presence of divine force indicates that you're on the right path. 470 00:38:15.119 --> 00:38:19.880 Therefore, it should act as inspiration and encouragement to you. Believe in 471 00:38:19.920 --> 00:38:25.199 your dreams and goals and your reap abundantly. Again, we're talking about workplace 472 00:38:25.800 --> 00:38:30.000 and how I struggle there every day that I wake up, I'd be like, 473 00:38:30.199 --> 00:38:34.519 man, how do I get closer to my dreams? How do I 474 00:38:34.559 --> 00:38:37.559 get closer to my goals? How do I get closer to my aspirations? 475 00:38:37.960 --> 00:38:46.159 How do I live a fulfilled life? How do I put fucking goodness back 476 00:38:46.199 --> 00:38:58.280 into humanity? Because it's not there? It's not there. Mm. The 477 00:38:58.400 --> 00:39:01.880 angels are speaking to you, and it reveals that your project will succeed. 478 00:39:02.119 --> 00:39:08.599 This video gonna go crazy, okay. Period. Moreover, professionally you will 479 00:39:08.639 --> 00:39:14.199 be promoted again. Were talking about workplace? So am I gonna be promoted 480 00:39:14.199 --> 00:39:19.320 in the workplace? Or I'm gonna be promoted in my purpose? Am I 481 00:39:19.360 --> 00:39:22.960 gonna be promoted creatively? What did I say earlier? I could do this 482 00:39:23.039 --> 00:39:28.800 shit or day I could literally stay in this bitch until six in the morning 483 00:39:29.440 --> 00:39:34.440 and like be having an amazing time. Obviously I don't. I probably would 484 00:39:34.440 --> 00:39:36.880 not really talk to six in the morning. But I'm just saying, like, 485 00:39:38.000 --> 00:39:44.280 I could do this shit for hours and hours and not like for real, 486 00:39:44.519 --> 00:39:50.280 I love this at work, baby mama. And that's the thing I 487 00:39:50.360 --> 00:39:53.280 talk. They treat you like a slave in that bitch. You gotta stand 488 00:39:53.360 --> 00:40:01.639 for eight hours. I can't take a seat for five seconds I don't have. 489 00:40:02.119 --> 00:40:07.800 There is no HR at my job. I gotta stand for eight hours. 490 00:40:08.079 --> 00:40:15.400 I don't get a lunch break. My job position, we don't get 491 00:40:15.400 --> 00:40:20.719 a lunch break. Other departments do, but we don't. I have to 492 00:40:20.840 --> 00:40:22.400 stand there and eat my lunch behind the desk, and people be coming up 493 00:40:22.440 --> 00:40:24.280 like, Oh, I'm so sorry. I don't mean to interrupt you. 494 00:40:24.320 --> 00:40:30.239 No, I'm on the clock. Let me let me help you. You 495 00:40:30.320 --> 00:40:32.760 know what I'm saying. I don't get a lunch break. They got a 496 00:40:34.199 --> 00:40:37.079 first of all, I didn't even like this in elementary school for kids. 497 00:40:37.760 --> 00:40:42.119 I don't gotta raise my motherfucking hand to go to the bathroom. I don't 498 00:40:42.119 --> 00:40:45.360 need a pass. And if I have to go to the fucking bathroom, 499 00:40:45.400 --> 00:40:53.159 I'm walking off this floor and I'm going to the fucking bathroom where they do 500 00:40:53.239 --> 00:41:07.199 that at again, were talking about humanity. I've said, no, I 501 00:41:07.199 --> 00:41:09.440 don't ask to go to the bathroom at work. Let's get that clear. 502 00:41:09.480 --> 00:41:13.360 I don't ask. I walk the fuck off. If I come back and 503 00:41:13.440 --> 00:41:15.840 somebody sitting at the front desk, oh, how can I help you? 504 00:41:15.840 --> 00:41:20.559 You know what I'm saying, I had to go to the fucking bathroom. 505 00:41:20.599 --> 00:41:28.239 What else, no HR, no lunch break, the bathroom shit. And 506 00:41:28.239 --> 00:41:30.679 that's another thing. So with the whole yoga thing, and I didn't want 507 00:41:30.679 --> 00:41:34.480 to be you know what I'm saying. I was really excited. I think 508 00:41:34.960 --> 00:41:37.639 when did I bring that up on the last episode. I don't know, 509 00:41:37.400 --> 00:41:44.480 but I was really excited about that. And then I was getting in my 510 00:41:44.559 --> 00:41:47.840 head about it cause but it's because I have problems with the workplace period. 511 00:41:49.239 --> 00:41:53.440 So number one again, and this is the thing. Oh so working at 512 00:41:53.440 --> 00:42:00.079 the front desk two. Like again, we got very minimal employees and that 513 00:42:00.159 --> 00:42:05.880 position, and you need some employees there because guess what, a person that 514 00:42:06.039 --> 00:42:09.079 works at the front desk at a hotel, we can't leave until we get 515 00:42:09.079 --> 00:42:13.000 relieved. You can't just walk off the front desk. Somebody gotta be there 516 00:42:13.039 --> 00:42:17.440 at all times. So again, imagine somebody being stuck in traffic or something 517 00:42:17.440 --> 00:42:21.639 happened with their family, you know what I'm saying. So, but the 518 00:42:21.719 --> 00:42:27.760 thing about that is I'm considerate of others because I want people to be considerate 519 00:42:27.800 --> 00:42:32.079 of me. I do my best to be on to I do my best 520 00:42:32.079 --> 00:42:35.960 to be early, you know what I'm saying, Because when that clock hit 521 00:42:36.239 --> 00:42:38.320 motherfucker's be ready to go. I don't want to be sitting around waiting on 522 00:42:38.360 --> 00:42:42.480 you because you walked out the house fifteen minutes late. And you know what 523 00:42:42.519 --> 00:42:45.440 I'm saying. Like, but first of all, I'm first shit in that 524 00:42:45.559 --> 00:42:51.480 bitch. So but still it's more than trafficking whatever. But I try to 525 00:42:51.480 --> 00:42:53.519 be considerate of others in that situation because I want you to be considerate of 526 00:42:53.559 --> 00:42:58.880 me. I'm ready to go after dealing with the bullshit in here, you 527 00:42:58.920 --> 00:43:02.159 know what I'm saying. So, so that's the thing. So in that 528 00:43:02.199 --> 00:43:07.239 position, for me, if I do a yoga event in my job, 529 00:43:07.079 --> 00:43:13.159 I want every First of all, everybody wants to participate, but the gang. 530 00:43:13.320 --> 00:43:15.719 Can the gang participate? Can the people that work my position, can 531 00:43:15.760 --> 00:43:20.880 they participate? Because somebody always has to be at the front desk. They're 532 00:43:20.920 --> 00:43:24.000 having a holiday, a holiday party, and this is the thing, this 533 00:43:24.079 --> 00:43:32.360 is not like a typical job. Look at my cousin, how you're on 534 00:43:32.559 --> 00:43:42.320 live, You're on the podcast now I'm recording. So no, I'm gonna 535 00:43:42.360 --> 00:43:46.760 hit you when I when I'm done with this, everybody, What was I 536 00:43:46.880 --> 00:43:51.559 saying? So I want the gang to be able to participate, First of 537 00:43:51.559 --> 00:43:54.039 all a lot of people. Everybody wants to part I don't want to say 538 00:43:54.039 --> 00:43:59.639 everybody, but motherfuckers want to participate in yog Everybody love everybody love me in 539 00:43:59.639 --> 00:44:02.239 that bitch. Not everybody, not everybody, but for the most part, 540 00:44:02.519 --> 00:44:06.000 everybody love me in that bitch. So you know, niggas want to do 541 00:44:06.079 --> 00:44:14.400 yoga and shit. My thing is, though, I got a whole plan 542 00:44:14.480 --> 00:44:20.760 for my shit, and if I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do it 543 00:44:20.840 --> 00:44:25.400 right right. First of all, if I'm going to do this, I 544 00:44:25.440 --> 00:44:30.639 gotta have at least thirty minutes. I want to do a legit session. 545 00:44:30.800 --> 00:44:34.360 So this is not a ten minute, fifteen minute we're gonna throw this on 546 00:44:34.480 --> 00:44:37.840 during and employee lunching. I'm not doing that, you know what I'm saying, 547 00:44:37.920 --> 00:44:39.320 Like, this is real, and I want people to be able to 548 00:44:39.360 --> 00:44:44.039 really participate. You talking about you care about people's health and wellness. Let's 549 00:44:44.039 --> 00:44:45.920 really care about health and wellness. Not Oh, we're just gonna do this 550 00:44:45.920 --> 00:44:49.480 for five minutes and then we're gonna go eat that pizza that we got from 551 00:44:49.519 --> 00:44:53.519 Domino's. No, it's gonna be a real thing. Don't mix my sh 552 00:44:53.639 --> 00:44:57.239 don't travel my shit in with the employee lunching. No, this is a 553 00:44:57.239 --> 00:45:01.679 rett health and wellness in the workplace. Okay, So that that's I was 554 00:45:01.719 --> 00:45:06.519 feeling some type of way about that. That was number one. Number two, 555 00:45:06.719 --> 00:45:09.039 can the gang participate? First of all, is this gonna be happening 556 00:45:09.079 --> 00:45:13.920 on a day where I'm working. I gotta go to the bathroom, I 557 00:45:13.960 --> 00:45:16.159 gotta put on my yoga gear. I want other people put on their yo 558 00:45:16.280 --> 00:45:22.440 nobody's doing yoga and fucking work clothes. So again, this has to be 559 00:45:22.519 --> 00:45:27.000 a set aside timed. This has to be a real event, you know 560 00:45:27.039 --> 00:45:30.840 what I'm saying, Like again, this is not no five minute thing, 561 00:45:31.239 --> 00:45:36.960 like, this is for real. So that was a thing for me. 562 00:45:37.280 --> 00:45:44.320 And then again you got all the toxic workplace shit going on as well as 563 00:45:44.400 --> 00:45:46.920 well, is in addition to the shit going on, like you know what 564 00:45:46.960 --> 00:45:51.880 I'm saying, all the others that's going on. So yeah, so still 565 00:45:51.960 --> 00:45:54.079 trying to figure that thing out as well. You know, maybe we can 566 00:45:55.800 --> 00:45:59.119 again he was talking about, oh it's supposed to be a new year. 567 00:45:59.159 --> 00:46:00.559 Yeah, maybe we'll bring a new year in, right, Maybe gonna bring 568 00:46:00.599 --> 00:46:09.400 the new year in right. So all of that and then just everything that's 569 00:46:09.400 --> 00:46:13.840 going on in life. So like back to it again where he was asking 570 00:46:13.960 --> 00:46:16.880 was it the workplace or was it personal? There are a lot of things 571 00:46:16.920 --> 00:46:22.880 going on in my personal life. There are a lot of things going on 572 00:46:22.960 --> 00:46:31.480 in my personal life. And that's tough because I'm a tough cookie, but 573 00:46:31.559 --> 00:46:36.880 I'm very tough on myself, Like, and I just want to tell y'all 574 00:46:36.920 --> 00:46:45.480 to be easy with yourself, Be gentle with yourself, talk to yourself in 575 00:46:45.519 --> 00:46:51.199 a positive manner, like you already got the whole world ready to come down 576 00:46:51.239 --> 00:46:53.719 on you. One of the funniest fucking videos that I'll be watching on TikTok, 577 00:46:53.760 --> 00:47:00.840 I don't even know her name, is this girl that like she'd be 578 00:47:00.840 --> 00:47:07.679 acting like a cashier at a gas station and it's just like a reenactment of 579 00:47:07.679 --> 00:47:10.280 how people talk to cashiers and shit, and she'd be so loud and what 580 00:47:10.320 --> 00:47:14.880 the fuck like just going off and it just be like, this is really 581 00:47:14.880 --> 00:47:19.440 how people be. So that shit is funny. It's fuck to me. 582 00:47:19.480 --> 00:47:23.159 But yeah, so if you got people, you already gotta deal with people 583 00:47:23.280 --> 00:47:27.679 in the fucking world. You gotta deal with the motherfuckers trying to tear you 584 00:47:27.719 --> 00:47:30.840 down. Uh, don't be on your Cardi B Tianna Taylor, jazz and 585 00:47:30.880 --> 00:47:35.719 rapper shit, where you be in relationships or in whatever and them motherfucks. 586 00:47:35.760 --> 00:47:37.679 That's what I'm saying, Like, that's how you know the hate be real 587 00:47:37.719 --> 00:47:40.599 because people in the world won'ta try to tear you down when your spot's trying 588 00:47:40.599 --> 00:47:45.320 to tear you down. That's a different type. Like it's different. But 589 00:47:45.400 --> 00:47:52.920 if you know, you know, So, yeah, lost my trailer thought 590 00:47:52.960 --> 00:48:05.679 again, But yeah, that just threw me. Oh, I just wanted 591 00:48:05.679 --> 00:48:10.920 to show this real quick. My homegirls, my homegirl's been on my head, 592 00:48:12.119 --> 00:48:15.960 like, girl, you don't be doing the tarot cards no more, 593 00:48:15.800 --> 00:48:21.559 you don't be talking about astrology no more. And I had to really, 594 00:48:24.079 --> 00:48:28.079 I had to really have a moment with myself, like, jasn't it up. 595 00:48:28.159 --> 00:48:30.920 But again, it goes back to appreciating the season of your life that 596 00:48:30.960 --> 00:48:36.360 you're in. Cause I am definitely an astrology girly. I'm definitely a tarot 597 00:48:36.360 --> 00:48:38.920 girly. Y'all know. I had my face where I was heavy on the 598 00:48:38.960 --> 00:48:44.559 tarotts, pulling cards whatever. I was heavy with the astrology shit. Taking 599 00:48:44.639 --> 00:48:47.599 online class I took online classes for tarot and for astrology and all types of 600 00:48:47.599 --> 00:48:51.400 shit, and it's like that shit kind of died out. But there was 601 00:48:51.440 --> 00:48:53.199 a time on the podcast where I was doing that heavy and people love that 602 00:48:53.360 --> 00:48:58.679 pulling for the signs and just whatever, doing shit for the collective, and 603 00:48:58.719 --> 00:49:02.320 that shit just kind of went ghosts for a minute. So my homegirls always 604 00:49:02.360 --> 00:49:05.480 be like, you should pull cars, you could do this, and so 605 00:49:05.719 --> 00:49:08.639 like I left all my tyrot cars, all that shit is still in Detroit. 606 00:49:08.760 --> 00:49:15.440 Like again, I came here on a trial run at first, just 607 00:49:15.480 --> 00:49:17.400 to see and you know what I'm saying, just to see if it was 608 00:49:17.440 --> 00:49:21.760 gonna work out, if opportunities was gonna present themselves with the jobs and shit. 609 00:49:21.800 --> 00:49:22.800 And again when I stepped off the plane, I had a fucking job. 610 00:49:22.920 --> 00:49:30.119 But you know, so I didn't bring everything here, but I had 611 00:49:30.119 --> 00:49:36.960 to have a moment with myself, like I think you should get back to 612 00:49:37.000 --> 00:49:40.519 that. I think you should tap back into the tarrot, the astrology. 613 00:49:44.360 --> 00:49:47.639 You know. I feel like I'm kind of getting away from my intuitive side 614 00:49:47.639 --> 00:49:52.880 and ways, and I think that's very important because as a very spiritual person, 615 00:49:55.760 --> 00:50:04.440 it's very important to be in tune with your intuition, very important, 616 00:50:04.679 --> 00:50:07.039 and a lot of people, I feel like I get a lot of flak 617 00:50:07.199 --> 00:50:12.119 for again being an emotional person, for being an intuitive person, for Ooh, 618 00:50:12.400 --> 00:50:14.800 you feel like you ain't supposed to go with how you feel, You're 619 00:50:14.800 --> 00:50:17.400 supposed to go off your logic in your brain. Like absolutely, it's a 620 00:50:17.400 --> 00:50:22.840 place in time for that. But also you gotta walk through life, you 621 00:50:22.920 --> 00:50:30.079 know, off your intuition. Think about when you are in dire situations like 622 00:50:30.199 --> 00:50:34.039 dang, your intuition tap in like dang, I feel like something about to 623 00:50:34.079 --> 00:50:37.280 happen, or you know what I'm saying, those gut feelings. You have 624 00:50:37.360 --> 00:50:42.079 to be in tune with your intuition. So yeah, I think And y'all 625 00:50:42.159 --> 00:50:47.480 remember when I was the High Priestess Queen on Instagram again in It Again seasons 626 00:50:47.519 --> 00:50:52.039 seasons? Remember when I was High Priest's Queen. I remember when I was 627 00:50:52.119 --> 00:50:54.440 podcast Bay. I remember when, like when I first got on Instagram, 628 00:50:54.480 --> 00:50:58.599 I was Mommy Sita. I don't know why the fuck, but you know 629 00:50:58.639 --> 00:51:00.599 what I'm saying, I went, you go through those phases. Now I'm 630 00:51:00.639 --> 00:51:07.880 healing my homies, So you go through those seasons. Cat shout out to 631 00:51:07.960 --> 00:51:13.440 Cat Miss Cat. She was. I've been seeing her on Instagram live in 632 00:51:13.480 --> 00:51:15.760 the mornings. She getting back on her morning routine. She said, like 633 00:51:15.800 --> 00:51:19.679 she was in her grinding season with her job, trying to get much she 634 00:51:20.079 --> 00:51:23.159 at that season, I'm like, I feel you. And she had said, 635 00:51:23.400 --> 00:51:28.599 we were talking about yoga, and I'm like, yeah, I remember 636 00:51:28.599 --> 00:51:30.039 when I was. We were talking about like when we was on our health 637 00:51:30.039 --> 00:51:34.239 shit, when we was on our yoga kicked tough. I'm talking doing yoga 638 00:51:34.280 --> 00:51:39.440 every day, every day, sometimes multiple times a day. I was in 639 00:51:39.519 --> 00:51:44.320 better physical shape. You know what I'm saying. I was a little more 640 00:51:44.320 --> 00:51:46.400 healthier. But guess what that and I hate this word, but we both 641 00:51:46.440 --> 00:51:49.519 said it's like I was like, that was one of the broken times in 642 00:51:49.599 --> 00:51:52.119 my life. I'm not gonna lie. I was on my shit, but 643 00:51:52.800 --> 00:52:00.599 I didn't have a lot of money. I had lost my job. Did 644 00:52:00.599 --> 00:52:05.760 I look. Oh, when I was working at Yoga six and that location 645 00:52:06.039 --> 00:52:08.920 like just was not doing it, just wasn't but it wasn't doing well before 646 00:52:08.960 --> 00:52:14.079 I got there and the manager had just hit me up. It was a 647 00:52:14.119 --> 00:52:15.880 couple of days before Christmas or it might have been the start of December, 648 00:52:15.880 --> 00:52:19.599 and she was like, Hey, I'm shutting this bitch down my fence, 649 00:52:19.679 --> 00:52:22.400 Like I can't do this. I gotta pay bills, and I'm like, 650 00:52:22.599 --> 00:52:24.199 oh damn, Like, do you think that we don't have family? You 651 00:52:24.280 --> 00:52:27.920 knew that shit was going under? You should have you should have warned people 652 00:52:27.920 --> 00:52:30.079 a long time ago. But anyway, So I had lost my job and 653 00:52:30.199 --> 00:52:36.199 during that I had just signed up for yoga teacher training. I was like, 654 00:52:36.199 --> 00:52:38.159 how the fuck am I gonna pay for this? Like what? So? 655 00:52:38.440 --> 00:52:42.960 And that was that was a very crucial time in my life. I 656 00:52:43.000 --> 00:52:49.639 was working my ass off. Literally, I was working at the yoga studio 657 00:52:49.800 --> 00:52:53.360 that I was taking my yoga teacher training at. I wasn't seeing a penny 658 00:52:53.400 --> 00:52:58.760 of that money that shit was going to the training. I was like, 659 00:52:59.000 --> 00:53:02.599 this is crazy as hell, But I did that. Shit. That's one 660 00:53:02.599 --> 00:53:07.840 of my greatest accomplishments to this day. And as quick as I did it, 661 00:53:07.000 --> 00:53:16.000 like I've been doing yoga. It was a year in October of this 662 00:53:16.119 --> 00:53:23.679 year. It's December. I've only been doing yoga year. I became a 663 00:53:23.719 --> 00:53:31.199 certified yoga teacher in February of twenty twenty three. Was that this year? 664 00:53:34.320 --> 00:53:37.440 Yeah? That was this year I started. Yeah, I started in October 665 00:53:37.519 --> 00:53:40.760 last year. October twenty twenty two is when I first started doing didn't know 666 00:53:40.920 --> 00:53:46.480 shit I had. Man, I had did yoga a couple times. The 667 00:53:46.519 --> 00:53:51.000 first couple of times that I had did yoga, I hated it. I 668 00:53:51.079 --> 00:53:54.960 was like, this is terrible, uh Like, and also I think it 669 00:53:55.039 --> 00:53:58.440 was the shape that I was in, you know what I'm saying, just 670 00:53:58.480 --> 00:54:02.400 because I wasn't super active, but also like yoga is a different type of 671 00:54:02.440 --> 00:54:06.119 beast, Like you know what I'm saying, stretching your body and all that, 672 00:54:06.119 --> 00:54:08.280 that's not just like people like to just go work out real quick, 673 00:54:08.320 --> 00:54:13.360 but baby, actually stretching your body and being in them poses like that shit 674 00:54:13.480 --> 00:54:16.360 is uncomfortable as hell. I was like, I hate this and it wasn't 675 00:54:16.400 --> 00:54:22.599 hot yoga. I love fucking hot yog Like that's that's my shit. Like, 676 00:54:22.840 --> 00:54:28.599 but okay, you can't really you gotta your hair gotta be braike if 677 00:54:28.639 --> 00:54:30.920 you're a black girl, your hair has to be braided to do yoga for 678 00:54:31.000 --> 00:54:35.760 real, Like you gonna switch your shit again if you just doing regular yoga, 679 00:54:35.840 --> 00:54:39.440 maybe, but I like hot yoga, so you can't really have your 680 00:54:39.440 --> 00:54:44.679 hair like this every day. But yeah, like I hated yoga. I 681 00:54:44.719 --> 00:54:49.239 was like this, Like I did it a couple of times. I used 682 00:54:49.280 --> 00:54:52.800 to hate Cat Kyle. I used to think that was the worst. How 683 00:54:52.800 --> 00:54:54.880 do you do your back? Like, like I hated that shit. I 684 00:54:54.920 --> 00:54:59.719 was like, yoga is just not it. So I had did it a 685 00:54:59.800 --> 00:55:04.440 few few times and then you know, I've talked about this before on the 686 00:55:04.519 --> 00:55:08.880 podcast, so but whatever, we'll tell the story again. So it wasn't 687 00:55:08.920 --> 00:55:15.840 really until I had that incident where I fainted twice, and I was like, 688 00:55:15.119 --> 00:55:19.280 bro, I got it. I'm like, literally, I need to 689 00:55:19.280 --> 00:55:22.719 get balanced. Not I fainted, even though that probably ain't that's not like 690 00:55:22.719 --> 00:55:25.199 one hundred percent of it, like actually being balanced with you know, just 691 00:55:25.199 --> 00:55:28.760 on some funny shit like I need to get balanced, I need to figure 692 00:55:28.800 --> 00:55:30.400 something out. But also I felt like it was a lot of stress and 693 00:55:30.480 --> 00:55:34.239 anxiety in my life. I had so much going on. I'm like, 694 00:55:34.880 --> 00:55:38.280 let me just I don't know whatever. I just felt called to look into 695 00:55:38.360 --> 00:55:46.159 yoga, and I remember they had started building or yoga studio was about to 696 00:55:46.159 --> 00:55:50.880 open up on fucking seven mile of Livernoids. I'm like, that's crazy as 697 00:55:50.880 --> 00:55:55.440 fuck, that's dope. So I remember just like looking into yoga studios and 698 00:55:55.559 --> 00:56:00.800 yoga teacher training and all of that, and then that's when I had got 699 00:56:00.800 --> 00:56:04.639 the job at Yoga six and I was working at the front desk and baby 700 00:56:05.119 --> 00:56:08.800 the free yoga membership. So and I remember even then like I had took 701 00:56:08.840 --> 00:56:12.239 a few of the classes and I'm like, oh, this is you know, 702 00:56:12.400 --> 00:56:16.280 whatever is cool, It's cool. And then I just fell in love 703 00:56:16.360 --> 00:56:21.559 with that shit. And I was doing that shit every day, multiple times 704 00:56:21.559 --> 00:56:25.840 a day. And then I felt called to do Yoga's teacher training and I'm 705 00:56:25.880 --> 00:56:28.920 like, bro, I'm really about to do this shit, like I'm about 706 00:56:28.920 --> 00:56:31.920 to be like I really love that shit, and I'm like I want to 707 00:56:31.920 --> 00:56:37.000 be a teacher. So again, lost the job all of that, and 708 00:56:37.039 --> 00:56:39.920 again that was like one of the I hate that but you know what I'm 709 00:56:39.920 --> 00:56:44.559 saying, It was a very hard time in my life financially, but I 710 00:56:44.679 --> 00:56:50.239 was very proud of myself for accomplishing that in such short time. Again, 711 00:56:50.280 --> 00:56:52.320 like I said, just this past October just made it a year that I've 712 00:56:52.320 --> 00:57:00.400 been doing yoga. So yeah, like, and that shit really get you 713 00:57:00.440 --> 00:57:08.159 together physically, mentally, spiritually, Like it's just I just can't even describe 714 00:57:08.239 --> 00:57:12.480 the release, Like I just love going to class. I look, oh, 715 00:57:12.960 --> 00:57:16.320 I don't know. But also, you know, there are a lot 716 00:57:16.360 --> 00:57:23.800 of lessons that you learn on the mat just through body movements and also through 717 00:57:23.920 --> 00:57:28.840 if you got a dope ass, deep ass teacher talking that shit to you. 718 00:57:28.840 --> 00:57:32.159 You know what I'm saying, But it's just a reflection of life and 719 00:57:34.960 --> 00:57:37.760 having to be strong physically, you know what I'm saying, to be able 720 00:57:37.800 --> 00:57:43.880 to withstand those tough moments, those hard times when you want to give up 721 00:57:43.880 --> 00:57:47.639 where you like in yoga, there are a lot of times where you want 722 00:57:47.639 --> 00:57:51.320 to where your body want to give out, and it's like no, hold 723 00:57:51.320 --> 00:58:00.800 this post, hold it. That shit gets painful, But SODA's life. 724 00:58:02.039 --> 00:58:07.559 Trying to keep it together, trying to keep pushing through, trying you know 725 00:58:07.599 --> 00:58:14.360 what I'm saying, to remain standing to like to man, life is gonna 726 00:58:14.400 --> 00:58:17.920 take you through some shit. Life is gonna beat your ass. Life got 727 00:58:19.039 --> 00:58:27.079 hands. So it's a lot. And again it's a lot physically, but 728 00:58:27.159 --> 00:58:30.960 it's a lot mentally as well. And that's what you gotta understand about life 729 00:58:31.000 --> 00:58:37.920 too. Like you literally are in this three D reality like going through life 730 00:58:37.960 --> 00:58:40.079 physically, but it's a lot on you mentally. What was I talking about 731 00:58:40.119 --> 00:58:49.639 earlier, Like mental health is real? Are you okay? Are you okay, 732 00:58:49.679 --> 00:58:52.320 are people asking you? Are you okay? Are you asking people? 733 00:58:52.400 --> 00:58:59.679 Are you okay? Uh? Are you being kind to others? Because again, 734 00:58:59.719 --> 00:59:01.559 you don't know what somebody is dealing with. You don't know what somebody 735 00:59:01.639 --> 00:59:07.119 is going through, you know what I'm saying. Back to humanity, and 736 00:59:07.159 --> 00:59:10.239 again in the way that we're treating people, man, look at again, 737 00:59:10.360 --> 00:59:15.960 look at the state of the fucking world. My homegirl Panda okay, free 738 00:59:15.000 --> 00:59:19.719 Palestine, she okay, she don't fucking play. But again, shit like 739 00:59:19.840 --> 00:59:28.480 that, like, look all we're treating people in the world. So yeah, 740 00:59:28.639 --> 00:59:32.280 this shit goes beyond a fucking job to me. And again, if 741 00:59:32.280 --> 00:59:37.840 I have to show up to a place every fucking day and I'm not being 742 00:59:37.920 --> 00:59:46.079 treated right, yeah, it's a problem. Let's see. Is there anything 743 00:59:46.079 --> 00:59:57.440 else I want to talk about? Should I get into these cards? It's 744 00:59:57.480 --> 01:00:04.840 real life shit over here. I also just want to say, you could 745 01:00:04.880 --> 01:00:09.360 put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig. Because you really 746 01:00:09.360 --> 01:00:14.559 gotta live this fucking life, Okay, you really gotta do the work, 747 01:00:14.599 --> 01:00:19.880 You really gotta heal, you really gotta be about the shit that you say 748 01:00:20.280 --> 01:00:25.639 you're about. You could see through it when people are not doing the work. 749 01:00:25.639 --> 01:00:34.079 You can see through it when people be lying, like it's gonna show 750 01:00:34.079 --> 01:00:40.079 what type of person you really are. Period, move like your blessing is 751 01:00:40.119 --> 01:00:43.559 around the corner. I had to do that at work for real one day. 752 01:00:45.840 --> 01:00:49.960 That was one of my high energy days. I was listening to my 753 01:00:50.079 --> 01:00:52.880 morning affirmations and all that stuff, and I was like, Jasmin, going 754 01:00:52.960 --> 01:00:58.079 to work today and move like your blessing is around the corner. And I 755 01:00:58.159 --> 01:01:00.679 remember that day. I had got in a work and I was about to 756 01:01:00.679 --> 01:01:01.599 go clock in. I was going down the steps and I turned the corner. 757 01:01:01.599 --> 01:01:04.679 I'm like, bitch, you gotta move like the blessings around the corner. 758 01:01:04.679 --> 01:01:06.920 So I was at the shock that, like I literally had to do 759 01:01:06.960 --> 01:01:09.960 that in my mind, but for real, like and then I had to 760 01:01:09.960 --> 01:01:15.239 ask myself, so if you how would I move if I was moving like 761 01:01:15.280 --> 01:01:20.599 my blessing was around the corner. Initially, you're gonna be kind of anxious, 762 01:01:20.639 --> 01:01:22.719 kind of scared, you know what I'm saying, Because if it's around 763 01:01:22.760 --> 01:01:24.039 the corner, that bitch gonna pop out, like you know what I'm saying. 764 01:01:24.079 --> 01:01:28.400 So, but how would you move if you knew that it was around 765 01:01:28.440 --> 01:01:31.280 the corner. I wouldn't be worried about my problems. I wouldn't be you 766 01:01:31.360 --> 01:01:34.960 know what I'm saying. I wouldn't be in that negative energy. I wouldn't 767 01:01:34.960 --> 01:01:37.639 be in that low vibrating energy. I'm gonna be happy as fuck. I'm 768 01:01:37.760 --> 01:01:38.920 I got it in the bag. I already know what's coming. It's around 769 01:01:38.920 --> 01:01:42.400 the corner. As soon as I turned this corner, boop, my blessing, 770 01:01:42.599 --> 01:01:45.280 my abundance, my prosperity, my you know what I'm saying, My 771 01:01:45.400 --> 01:01:52.360 success, my happiness, my peace, my beautiful life, my you know 772 01:01:52.360 --> 01:01:58.639 what I'm saying. Like, so you have to move in that energy. 773 01:01:58.719 --> 01:02:01.519 You have to move and that energy, and the energy has to be real. 774 01:02:04.480 --> 01:02:09.679 The energy has to be real with the people around me. The energy 775 01:02:09.760 --> 01:02:19.039 has to be real. And that's what's really fucked up about being a very 776 01:02:19.039 --> 01:02:23.880 intuitive person, like on some real shit when you know the energy not right, 777 01:02:23.920 --> 01:02:28.199 and motherfuckers still sit there and smile on your face, and it's like, 778 01:02:28.400 --> 01:02:36.360 bro, fucking fraud. When you can feel the energy, when you 779 01:02:36.360 --> 01:02:43.840 can feel the tension, when you can feel the This is me looking at 780 01:02:43.880 --> 01:02:51.679 a person that like, bro, you in here lying to my face. 781 01:02:51.719 --> 01:02:53.840 You look at me dead in my eye, youre key king with me. 782 01:02:54.840 --> 01:03:00.639 You're saying all of the things, but the energy that's real. I can 783 01:03:00.679 --> 01:03:07.119 feel the energy, you know what I'm saying, So it's like the energy 784 01:03:07.119 --> 01:03:15.639 gotta be real. I said that detaching and separating is where you gain clarity 785 01:03:16.199 --> 01:03:28.039 and it gives you the time to really self reflect and grow. I really 786 01:03:29.320 --> 01:03:38.480 recognized my growth within these past couple months, and I love the clarity that 787 01:03:38.519 --> 01:03:46.639 I have received with a lot of things. But with so many things, 788 01:03:47.199 --> 01:03:52.880 I do a lot of self reflection. But I love the clarity that I 789 01:03:52.920 --> 01:03:57.159 get when I really just look at my life and all of my experiences and 790 01:03:57.159 --> 01:04:17.119 the shit that I'm going through. I've had a couple encounters with someone and 791 01:04:17.480 --> 01:04:25.559 I was able to see like the clarity of myself again, you know what 792 01:04:25.559 --> 01:04:31.280 I'm saying. Now that I'm detached or separated from a situation, I'm able 793 01:04:31.360 --> 01:04:36.360 to see clearly now. Remember when I said, like from the outside looking 794 01:04:36.400 --> 01:04:41.880 in, when you in a situation, you can't you can't really see what's 795 01:04:41.920 --> 01:04:45.760 happening. Now that I'm detached and separated, I can really see clearly now. 796 01:04:57.159 --> 01:05:00.760 Uh. I d like I just I have clarity in my mind I 797 01:05:00.760 --> 01:05:09.559 can see things clearly, and it's always great. First of all, I'm 798 01:05:09.559 --> 01:05:14.480 a person that always takes the high road. I always have been, and 799 01:05:15.280 --> 01:05:17.039 that sucks to always be the person that has to take the high road. 800 01:05:17.119 --> 01:05:21.639 But it's whatever. It's like, that's again, that's why, like I'm 801 01:05:21.679 --> 01:05:26.000 always just gonna be blessed. And when my big blessing come through, it's 802 01:05:26.039 --> 01:05:30.840 gonna be like again, it's gonna be like damn, because I always took 803 01:05:30.840 --> 01:05:36.639 the high road, So my shit gonna be you know, my cup gonna 804 01:05:36.679 --> 01:05:45.880 be runneth over. Like when people see me blessed, it's gonna be like, 805 01:05:46.079 --> 01:05:48.719 oh my God, like you gonna be able to see it. And 806 01:05:48.760 --> 01:05:53.519 it's just like a part of that is because I always took the high road. 807 01:05:54.280 --> 01:05:58.599 I was always a good person. But anyway, yeah, I always 808 01:05:58.599 --> 01:06:08.440 take the high road. So again, I feel like I'm a person that 809 01:06:08.519 --> 01:06:15.000 takes accountability. You can't force that on people, you know what I'm saying. 810 01:06:15.079 --> 01:06:16.719 People got their own path and their own life to live, and they 811 01:06:16.760 --> 01:06:20.800 own shit to figure out. Uh. When I reincarnate, I'm hoping I'm 812 01:06:20.800 --> 01:06:24.360 gonna be up to the next level. You know, I hope I'm not 813 01:06:24.400 --> 01:06:28.400 dealing with no bullshit. But again, I think because I take a lot 814 01:06:28.440 --> 01:06:32.000 of accountability and I do a lot of self reflection, I think I'm gonna 815 01:06:32.039 --> 01:06:39.840 be good. But to see a person not grow, to see a person 816 01:06:40.199 --> 01:06:48.199 not take accountability, to see a person not self reflect at all, it's 817 01:06:48.280 --> 01:06:58.840 a very sad sight to see. I feel like a lot of people be 818 01:06:58.920 --> 01:07:08.760 adult toddlers, and you could see how people's growth is stunted emotionally and mentally, 819 01:07:10.239 --> 01:07:13.199 and it's just like I said, it's just a sad sight to see. 820 01:07:13.239 --> 01:07:18.760 But again, I am just glad that I have a sense of clarity, 821 01:07:20.639 --> 01:07:26.000 and again not just about other people, but I have a sense of 822 01:07:26.079 --> 01:07:31.000 clarity about my growth and what my issues were in certain situations. You know 823 01:07:31.039 --> 01:07:36.440 what I'm saying, And that's why I'm working on myself. That's why I'm 824 01:07:36.480 --> 01:07:45.639 working on myself too. Only accept the best, going forward, only accepting 825 01:07:45.719 --> 01:07:54.679 the best. There are times, like a couple of days ago, I 826 01:07:54.719 --> 01:07:58.480 was like, that would not be the best, Jasmine, that would not 827 01:07:58.559 --> 01:08:01.639 be the best. So you know, I just had to tell myself that. 828 01:08:01.800 --> 01:08:08.920 But you know, you gotta acknowledge those things. So it's the clarity 829 01:08:09.000 --> 01:08:24.840 for me. Okay, let's get to these cards. I don't even know 830 01:08:26.439 --> 01:08:31.560 what's about to happen with this. I told y'all I was on an astrology 831 01:08:31.920 --> 01:08:41.880 in terror hiatus, so I have no idea what is about to happen. 832 01:08:44.720 --> 01:08:54.479 I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know what happened, but 833 01:08:54.560 --> 01:08:56.520 I'll pull you know what. And I know, y'all, I'm like, 834 01:08:56.359 --> 01:08:58.800 oh my god, pulls. I know, y'all would just die if I 835 01:08:58.840 --> 01:09:03.600 pulled something for every sign. Oh that was another thing. So, man, 836 01:09:03.640 --> 01:09:09.079 we're coming to a close of twenty twenty three. The end of the 837 01:09:09.199 --> 01:09:12.880 year is coming. It's about to be twenty twenty four. That is so 838 01:09:13.359 --> 01:09:19.960 crazy to me. I will be thirty four next year, March third. 839 01:09:20.319 --> 01:09:26.439 That's a very odd age. Like I feel like, you know, it's 840 01:09:26.520 --> 01:09:29.680 not like a milestone birthday, So thirty four I have to think of like 841 01:09:29.720 --> 01:09:34.399 a theme or a vibe for thirty four. But twenty twenty four is crazy 842 01:09:34.439 --> 01:09:39.800 to me, Like did you ever think that you would be here? I 843 01:09:39.840 --> 01:09:44.000 don't know. I don't know. Like when I think back to young Jasmine, 844 01:09:45.600 --> 01:09:49.279 I don't even know what I would have seen for myself at thirty four 845 01:09:49.359 --> 01:09:54.000 for real, Like if I went back to Jasmine at thirteen right now and 846 01:09:54.119 --> 01:09:56.399 was like, where do you think you would be at thirty four? I 847 01:09:56.479 --> 01:10:00.720 wonder what I would have said. It wouldn't have been this for show, 848 01:10:01.239 --> 01:10:05.880 It would not have been this. I could not have seen this coming. 849 01:10:08.840 --> 01:10:13.880 But as a thirty four year old woman, I look back at thirteen year 850 01:10:13.920 --> 01:10:21.119 old Jazmine, do you know how you got here? And look at the 851 01:10:21.199 --> 01:10:30.439 road that it took to get here. I'm looking at myself on the screen 852 01:10:30.560 --> 01:10:33.479 right now, because to me, I look the same, Like I said, 853 01:10:33.479 --> 01:10:36.199 I feel like I still look very young. I feel like I look 854 01:10:36.359 --> 01:10:42.359 very youthful. I feel like I look very radiant and vibrant. I love 855 01:10:42.439 --> 01:10:49.960 my energy. I've always been this person. I've this personality just like this 856 01:10:50.000 --> 01:10:53.600 is again, what did I say? What did my managers say about me? 857 01:10:53.680 --> 01:10:56.560 He said that he loved my energy in my charisma, Like I've literally 858 01:10:57.079 --> 01:11:01.319 always been this person. So I'm proud of me for that. I have 859 01:11:01.520 --> 01:11:08.960 been through a lot, like in my life from thirteen from I say thirteen 860 01:11:09.000 --> 01:11:14.880 because I feel like thirteen was a very monumental point in my life. If 861 01:11:14.960 --> 01:11:17.720 y'all listen to the podcast over the years, y'all y'all know, I talk 862 01:11:17.760 --> 01:11:23.279 about this all the time about like where I came from and like what it 863 01:11:23.359 --> 01:11:29.119 was like for me growing up, Like thirteen is a very significant point in 864 01:11:29.159 --> 01:11:31.680 my life because I was grown at thirteen. I'm not gonna lie. I 865 01:11:31.720 --> 01:11:36.079 had a very very mannish boyfriend. He was the same age as me, 866 01:11:36.159 --> 01:11:41.760 but he was just super experienced, super mannish, and so that's like that's 867 01:11:41.800 --> 01:11:45.560 when life started for me for real at thirteen. I started smoking weed at 868 01:11:45.600 --> 01:11:49.720 thirteen. Not that like I like the first time I ever smoked weed, 869 01:11:49.760 --> 01:11:54.119 I didn't enjoy it, like it was like I was tweaking for real, 870 01:11:54.760 --> 01:11:57.359 But I did start smoking at thirteen, Like you know what I'm saying. 871 01:11:57.439 --> 01:12:00.119 Thirteen was just like that was it for me. That's when life changed. 872 01:12:00.359 --> 01:12:04.239 And that's also crazy to me because my son is twelve. But it's so 873 01:12:04.319 --> 01:12:08.600 crazy because my son is on a whole different wavelength than me. Like I 874 01:12:08.640 --> 01:12:11.359 can't see my son being on the shit that I was on at thirteen at 875 01:12:11.359 --> 01:12:14.319 thirteen, my son is so different. And not to say like I was 876 01:12:14.359 --> 01:12:16.920 bad, Like I don't think that I was a bad kid, but I 877 01:12:16.960 --> 01:12:19.920 mean I just the environment that I was in, the kids that I went 878 01:12:19.920 --> 01:12:24.920 to school with like that's just what we was on. I don't I can't 879 01:12:24.960 --> 01:12:28.279 really say what the kids are doing at at school. I don't know what 880 01:12:28.439 --> 01:12:30.760 you know, what kids are really doing for real. But I have a 881 01:12:30.880 --> 01:12:35.600 very good child and you know, the world, the world has not gotten 882 01:12:35.640 --> 01:12:40.319 to him yet. Knock on wood. I don't want the world to get 883 01:12:40.359 --> 01:12:43.720 to him. But the reality of it all is that the world is going 884 01:12:43.800 --> 01:12:45.680 to get to him at some point, you know what I'm saying. But 885 01:12:45.720 --> 01:12:47.800 for right now, he's still in a very good space. He's still a 886 01:12:47.920 --> 01:12:53.760 child. I love that for him. But back to me, kid, 887 01:12:55.239 --> 01:13:01.479 So thirteen year old me, like I said, thirteen was like was grown. 888 01:13:04.680 --> 01:13:13.720 Like I said, I experienced a lot. I had a conversation with 889 01:13:13.760 --> 01:13:16.239 my homegirl, Cherish the other day. I was just checking in on her 890 01:13:16.800 --> 01:13:19.279 and she was talking about her daughter. I want to say, her daughter 891 01:13:19.359 --> 01:13:24.000 is thirteen, so she's at that age and it's like, you know, 892 01:13:25.640 --> 01:13:30.600 as a parent, you could do the best that you the best that you 893 01:13:30.680 --> 01:13:32.039 can do is all that you can do, you know what I'm saying. 894 01:13:32.760 --> 01:13:35.439 Like, at the end of the day, a kid is going to be 895 01:13:35.479 --> 01:13:40.399 a kid. A child is going to be a child. A child is 896 01:13:40.479 --> 01:13:43.560 going to do childish things, you know what I'm saying, And when you 897 01:13:43.640 --> 01:13:45.920 start to come of age, you're just gonna do things, you know what 898 01:13:45.920 --> 01:13:50.079 I'm saying. So you can never be down on yourself as a parent for 899 01:13:50.239 --> 01:13:55.720 a kid being a kid. But like I said, for me and even 900 01:13:55.720 --> 01:13:59.680 for my homegirl, like I feel like we are doing some of the best 901 01:13:59.760 --> 01:14:04.079 mother that I fucking know. So it's like, you know, however, 902 01:14:04.119 --> 01:14:08.079 our kids turn out like and I don't think that our kids are going to 903 01:14:08.119 --> 01:14:11.239 be bad or nothing like that, but it's just like we did a really 904 01:14:11.239 --> 01:14:15.720 good job. We are doing a very good job. So I'm proud of 905 01:14:15.800 --> 01:14:27.079 that young Jasmine went through a lot and as a black girl, as a 906 01:14:27.119 --> 01:14:31.000 black woman, Like right now, I'm only a mother of one. I 907 01:14:31.000 --> 01:14:36.359 have a son. I really do want to have a daughter, and if 908 01:14:36.399 --> 01:14:44.159 I ever do have a daughter, I am going to be the person that 909 01:14:44.319 --> 01:14:50.199 I needed as a young girl. You know what I'm saying. You can't 910 01:14:50.239 --> 01:14:56.159 speak to everybody else's parenting, you know what I'm saying, But I definitely 911 01:14:56.159 --> 01:14:58.119 want to be able and it's different, you know what I'm saying. With 912 01:14:58.159 --> 01:15:00.239 a son is different. Of course, my son is a mama's boy and 913 01:15:00.279 --> 01:15:06.520 all of that, but it's gonna be different with a girl because just the 914 01:15:06.560 --> 01:15:11.520 mother daughter thing, you know what I'm saying. And with me, I 915 01:15:11.560 --> 01:15:15.720 didn't really have like a very close relationship with my mom growing up. You 916 01:15:15.760 --> 01:15:20.760 know what I'm saying. That relationship was very it was a very unique relationship. 917 01:15:20.800 --> 01:15:26.720 It was a very unique experience. My mother daughter experience is very different. 918 01:15:30.079 --> 01:15:32.000 So I want my experience with my daughter, if I ever had one, 919 01:15:32.039 --> 01:15:34.800 I wanted to be different and I wanted to be a very good one. 920 01:15:35.199 --> 01:15:42.760 But it's just important to be you know, that that good influence over 921 01:15:42.800 --> 01:15:46.479 your child's life and to be the person that I want to be the person 922 01:15:46.520 --> 01:15:51.000 that I needed for my daughter. You know what I'm saying. Because when 923 01:15:51.039 --> 01:15:57.279 I tell y'all, women and girls go through a lot, and not to 924 01:15:57.319 --> 01:15:59.760 say that man don't, but this ain't This ain't for you know what I'm 925 01:15:59.760 --> 01:16:03.680 saying. That's your podcast. I don't know, but women and girls we 926 01:16:03.800 --> 01:16:12.399 go through so much. And it's like, but that's why I love myself 927 01:16:12.439 --> 01:16:16.359 though, because of my strength, you know what I'm saying. That's the 928 01:16:16.479 --> 01:16:23.920 masculine energy, my strength, but also that divine feminine energy you know what 929 01:16:23.920 --> 01:16:29.199 I'm saying, that nurturing spirit, that loving spirit, that creative spirit, 930 01:16:29.399 --> 01:16:34.479 that sensual spirit, that sexual spirit, like that grace, that that eloquence, 931 01:16:34.640 --> 01:16:38.600 that all of that, Like you know what I'm saying, like all 932 01:16:38.640 --> 01:16:45.399 of that to be a fucking black girl, to be a woman. So 933 01:16:45.760 --> 01:16:56.840 let's see, I'm just gonna pull some cards for the collective spirit. What 934 01:16:56.920 --> 01:17:04.279 are the vibes? What are the vibes? That's the lies I feel because 935 01:17:09.520 --> 01:17:15.439 I want to be able to hm whatever, I'll take it. These fell 936 01:17:15.439 --> 01:17:30.000 out first quinno Wan's two a Pinnacles fell out first. Okay, first of 937 01:17:30.039 --> 01:17:43.279 all, it's giving confidence, it's giving passion, it's giving creative energy and 938 01:17:43.359 --> 01:17:49.920 trying to find your balance with that. What do you need to take action 939 01:17:50.119 --> 01:18:03.479 on in your life creatively passionately? The page lines, Okay, it's giving 940 01:18:08.039 --> 01:18:15.880 new opportunities, new creative opportunities, and you're gonna be on fire with it. 941 01:18:16.520 --> 01:18:25.319 You're gonna be on fire with it. You're gonna be on fire with 942 01:18:25.479 --> 01:18:45.439 it. Let's see out of cups again. We're talking about juggling something. 943 01:18:45.479 --> 01:18:55.239 We're talking about trying to make a decision about something, making a decision about 944 01:18:55.239 --> 01:19:00.399 a creative opportunity that's gonna be coming in or some type of mess. Bitch 945 01:19:00.800 --> 01:19:13.159 an idea on something to do. When one door opens, another door closes. 946 01:19:13.600 --> 01:19:18.560 So you have to walk away from something I was talking about, detaching 947 01:19:18.600 --> 01:19:25.800 and separated from, you know, a situation in life. You have to 948 01:19:26.199 --> 01:19:28.680 like I just said, when one door opens, another closes. So in 949 01:19:28.720 --> 01:19:31.600 life, we have to walk away from a lot of things. We have 950 01:19:31.680 --> 01:19:35.880 to walk away from things that we were once emotionally attached to. We have 951 01:19:35.960 --> 01:19:50.800 to walk away from mm. We gotta walk away from those things that got 952 01:19:50.920 --> 01:19:55.159 to because usually those things have a hold on you. King of Pinnacles, 953 01:19:55.199 --> 01:20:04.079 not of swords, it is given. Walk away from whatever is in the 954 01:20:04.159 --> 01:20:10.319 past and look coming in fast on that new shit. Talk your shit. 955 01:20:11.640 --> 01:20:15.279 It's given. Talk your shit about what you wanna manifest in your life. 956 01:20:15.600 --> 01:20:19.680 Talk your shit about what you wanna manifest in your life. King of Pinnacles 957 01:20:19.840 --> 01:20:26.720 energy is somebody that is super grounded. This is okay. That that's the 958 01:20:26.760 --> 01:20:31.760 big dog. That's that, that's the that's the big boss. Sitting on 959 01:20:31.800 --> 01:20:35.560 the bag, sitting on the throat, secure the back, this gives secure 960 01:20:35.600 --> 01:20:43.319 the bag alert, Okay, King of Pinnacles, is secure the bag alert. 961 01:20:43.640 --> 01:20:47.800 Ooh, I didn't talk about my legal battles. I'm also going through 962 01:20:47.800 --> 01:20:56.279 a legal battle. That's not a sort of energy. But that's another thing 963 01:20:56.319 --> 01:21:05.560 too. That's that's another thing too. But yeah, you have to manifest 964 01:21:05.720 --> 01:21:15.920 whatever it is that you want for yourself, step into your creative back. 965 01:21:15.039 --> 01:21:20.279 I feel like with the way that the world is moving, society is moving, 966 01:21:20.520 --> 01:21:25.920 social media is moving, especially like if you're a social media influencer or 967 01:21:26.000 --> 01:21:31.039 you in that bag, like, baby, the coins is there, the 968 01:21:31.119 --> 01:21:40.359 coins is there. This makes this also makes me think about the people around 969 01:21:40.399 --> 01:21:45.640 me that I'm around creative energy all the fucking time. I have a lot 970 01:21:45.640 --> 01:21:56.720 of creative friends. Baby, creativity is key. No, I'm not. 971 01:21:56.840 --> 01:22:02.039 I'm gonna be honest with y'all. I'll keep it, but I don't really 972 01:22:02.039 --> 01:22:05.000 funk with reversals. But I'll keep it because I'll keep it in the reverse. 973 01:22:10.600 --> 01:22:14.000 Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold off, 974 01:22:14.279 --> 01:22:32.319 because why it's giving hold on. I want to clarify it to me. 975 01:22:32.920 --> 01:22:40.000 This is saying that whatever situation you got going on is not a divine 976 01:22:40.000 --> 01:22:44.119 connection. The lovers in reverse is not a divine connection. That's what it's 977 01:22:44.159 --> 01:22:48.880 giving you. Also got the six of cups the Emperor in the Will of 978 01:22:48.920 --> 01:23:06.720 Fortune again because we had the edcups two and I said the lovers in reverse 979 01:23:06.840 --> 01:23:11.560 is not a divine connection, walk away from and it doesn't have to just 980 01:23:11.640 --> 01:23:16.720 be a romantic relationship. But walk away from anything. Of course, everybody, 981 01:23:16.800 --> 01:23:23.399 let us say that's no longer serving you. But walk away from anything 982 01:23:23.439 --> 01:23:28.439 that is not divine. Walk away from anything that is not aligned with you, 983 01:23:28.439 --> 01:23:34.359 your goals, your purpose, whatever, Like anything that is unsettling in 984 01:23:34.399 --> 01:23:39.000 your spirit, anything that you are unsure of, anything that is like a 985 01:23:39.079 --> 01:23:44.600 hesitation to in your life, any relationship, but especially the lovers like cause 986 01:23:44.640 --> 01:23:48.800 again we were talking about Cardi b Tianna Taylor or like. Those relationships are 987 01:23:49.079 --> 01:23:56.680 some of the most important relationships in your life. Those relationships can make or 988 01:23:56.840 --> 01:24:01.119 break you. So anything that's not divine, anything that's not walk away from 989 01:24:01.159 --> 01:24:16.119 that or remove it from your energy. Because there are stable connections in your 990 01:24:16.199 --> 01:24:21.079 life. Will of fortune meaning good fortune is coming. You know what I'm 991 01:24:21.079 --> 01:24:27.880 saying. As the tables turn will a fortune given is short time. So 992 01:24:27.960 --> 01:24:34.520 you're going to come into stable connections. You're gonna come into relationships where there's 993 01:24:34.560 --> 01:24:39.960 an equal give and take where there is generosity, where there is like where 994 01:24:40.000 --> 01:24:49.119 you're getting where your energy is being reciprocated. It's also given daddy energy, 995 01:24:49.640 --> 01:24:56.760 ladies. It's given Daddy energy, it's given big dog energy. It's giving 996 01:24:56.880 --> 01:25:01.359 King energy, it's giving Emperor energy. Okay. And that's what you need 997 01:25:01.439 --> 01:25:12.199 in a connection. Okay, I don't need I don't need a three. 998 01:25:12.479 --> 01:25:27.640 And also it's like when I talk about situations aligning in your life that when 999 01:25:27.680 --> 01:25:34.119 I talk about situations aligning in your life, go wer shit feels good, 1000 01:25:34.920 --> 01:25:43.159 Go where shit flows. Go where the energy is reciprocated. Go where you 1001 01:25:43.279 --> 01:25:56.039 get back what you get. Will of fortune is good, Karma energy, 1002 01:25:58.119 --> 01:26:06.560 Queen of cups. Go where your heart is, Go where your heart is. 1003 01:26:10.359 --> 01:26:12.880 And again I said, what did I say earlier when I first got 1004 01:26:12.880 --> 01:26:15.039 out here. I said, I'm a Pisty's I said that I'm emotional by 1005 01:26:15.159 --> 01:26:21.199 nature. I'm really tapped into my spirituality and my intuition. I'm gonna always 1006 01:26:21.199 --> 01:26:26.479 go with my heart, baby, and I ain't gonna lie. I always 1007 01:26:26.479 --> 01:26:31.720 talk about that too on the podcast. Like that one little picture on Instagram, 1008 01:26:31.800 --> 01:26:35.319 it's a picture like the heart and he walking out the door on the 1009 01:26:35.359 --> 01:26:39.399 crutches, and the brain is like, don't go back out there again, 1010 01:26:39.600 --> 01:26:42.760 Like that's me every time i'm'a still go. I'm still gonna go back out 1011 01:26:42.760 --> 01:26:46.159 there. What's the Drake song? I still got some loved inside of me, 1012 01:26:46.439 --> 01:26:49.680 please drag it out. I still got love inside of me. I 1013 01:26:49.720 --> 01:26:56.039 still got love inside of me. So go where your heart is, Go 1014 01:26:56.079 --> 01:27:03.239 where the passion is. Why should you go there? Because that's where the 1015 01:27:03.279 --> 01:27:06.600 money is. That's what that that's where the money is. That's where the 1016 01:27:06.680 --> 01:27:13.920 Nina pinnacles is. That is giving secure the bag alert. Also the Hermit 1017 01:27:13.960 --> 01:27:19.359 card. So earlier I talked a lot about self reflection, right, the 1018 01:27:19.439 --> 01:27:25.520 hermit card is self reflection, it's it's retreating, it's going deep within. 1019 01:27:27.119 --> 01:27:29.039 Earlier when I was talking about what do I struggle with? And I was 1020 01:27:29.039 --> 01:27:31.800 talking about food and stuff like that, the own So it's very important to 1021 01:27:31.840 --> 01:27:35.039 be health conscious because that's the only way that you can hear God. The 1022 01:27:35.079 --> 01:27:40.319 hermit card is going inside, listening to the voice within, listening to the 1023 01:27:40.359 --> 01:27:46.239 God within, so you can receive those answers. And I am a motherfucking 1024 01:27:46.239 --> 01:27:49.600 hermit. I don't be out in these streets either, Yah, That's what 1025 01:27:49.640 --> 01:27:54.680 I'm saying. I told y'all, chaos is not quiet. I need peace. 1026 01:27:54.800 --> 01:28:05.119 I need to be able to give my answers. We need clarification on 1027 01:28:05.199 --> 01:28:12.359 the devil in the wh Energy is who the fuck? Energy is this? 1028 01:28:15.640 --> 01:28:24.159 And that's why and that's why, that's why, just how how I just 1029 01:28:24.239 --> 01:28:27.119 use the food as an example, but I'm just saying, so, the 1030 01:28:27.119 --> 01:28:32.760 hermit card is is that retreat energy going within? Is that inner guy energy? 1031 01:28:32.840 --> 01:28:40.520 Right, the devil and the nanosaurds. When you are attached to negativity, 1032 01:28:42.119 --> 01:28:47.399 whether that be lower vibrational plates at the table, whether that be sex, 1033 01:28:47.840 --> 01:28:55.640 drugs, alcohol, toxic relationships, bad friends, bad boyfriends, bad 1034 01:28:55.760 --> 01:29:01.399 girlfriends, situations, and people that want to keep you bonded together on bullshit, 1035 01:29:01.600 --> 01:29:08.439 on toxic negativity, on all of that type of shit, this is 1036 01:29:08.479 --> 01:29:15.560 the energy that you're going to be in up at night, mental anguish, 1037 01:29:15.640 --> 01:29:23.840 mental anxiety. Can't fucking sleep. What did I say earlier when I first 1038 01:29:23.840 --> 01:29:30.640 got out here. The swords are also symbolic of communication. I said that 1039 01:29:30.720 --> 01:29:40.399 this was gonna be the throat shocker episode. The color is blue. Self 1040 01:29:40.439 --> 01:29:47.960 expression, It is very important. But yeah, you can't. You can't 1041 01:29:47.960 --> 01:29:57.159 be in your hermit energy. You can't hear God. You don't know what 1042 01:29:57.199 --> 01:30:05.359 type of decision to make when you're in this energy, So you have to 1043 01:30:05.399 --> 01:30:11.640 get clear. What was I talking about earlier? I was able to. 1044 01:30:12.000 --> 01:30:15.159 I feel like I have clarity now, and not that I'm trying to make 1045 01:30:15.199 --> 01:30:17.399 this about me, but I'm just trying to get your to understand where I'm 1046 01:30:17.439 --> 01:30:26.319 going with this. Some boom I'll do that. I also was gonna say 1047 01:30:27.800 --> 01:30:33.800 I was thinking about doing a like I guess, like just an overview or 1048 01:30:34.039 --> 01:30:40.359 recap of my twenty twenty three but I don't even feel like I gotta do 1049 01:30:40.399 --> 01:30:45.000 that, cause I did that on my first video back on YouTube. I 1050 01:30:45.039 --> 01:30:48.520 talked about the last eight months of my life and like whatever, so I 1051 01:30:48.600 --> 01:30:51.279 kind of filled you all me in on what I did all year. So 1052 01:30:51.359 --> 01:30:55.560 I don't really think that. I mean, y'all know that I'm I'm here 1053 01:30:55.680 --> 01:31:01.159 now. I'm gonna always be here, Okay, that's what you gotta know. 1054 01:31:01.399 --> 01:31:13.319 So whatever monkey wrenches that the universe throws into plans, whatever, whatever 1055 01:31:14.199 --> 01:31:17.479 obstacles step in my way, whatever, you know, all of that bullshit, 1056 01:31:18.159 --> 01:31:25.279 I'm still here. I am still here. I am still here, 1057 01:31:25.600 --> 01:31:30.279 period. So yeah, Today was a Today was a very good day. 1058 01:31:30.520 --> 01:31:32.840 That was an interesting day. Like I said, I'm glad that I cried. 1059 01:31:32.920 --> 01:31:39.399 I'm glad that I had that moment. I told you after all of 1060 01:31:39.439 --> 01:31:42.319 that happened, I knew this was gonna be a real last episode when I 1061 01:31:42.359 --> 01:31:50.720 came in here today. That's what the fuck it is. Let me see, 1062 01:31:54.720 --> 01:31:57.720 I really got like four more minutes A girl can talk for two Well 1063 01:31:57.800 --> 01:32:02.640 it wasn't two hards because again I didn't the traffic and I think what else 1064 01:32:02.680 --> 01:32:06.600 held me up? Again that that happened the last time I got held back 1065 01:32:06.600 --> 01:32:13.479 at work too, But again it all it always works together for the greater 1066 01:32:13.560 --> 01:32:19.119 goods. So is there anything that I want to leave you guys with? 1067 01:32:21.560 --> 01:32:36.760 Let me see anything anything. Let's go back on here? Hm, No, 1068 01:32:38.520 --> 01:32:44.039 liven with something off the top of the dome jasmine, mm hmm. 1069 01:32:53.640 --> 01:33:03.960 What can I say? Until about twenty twenty four, it's about to be 1070 01:33:03.960 --> 01:33:20.039 a new year. What is my goal for the new year? My goal 1071 01:33:20.159 --> 01:33:34.720 is to step into my true self. My goal is to step into the 1072 01:33:34.880 --> 01:33:44.079 highest version of myself. And I say that and I truly honestly want to 1073 01:33:44.119 --> 01:33:48.720 do it from the bottom of my heart and I am going to do that. 1074 01:33:51.560 --> 01:33:58.159 However, I know that there's still a lot of work. You know 1075 01:33:58.159 --> 01:34:03.439 what I'm saying. We are all all works in progress. It's not an 1076 01:34:03.439 --> 01:34:11.039 overnight thing. Again, I do a lot of self reflection, so just 1077 01:34:11.079 --> 01:34:14.520 even on a daily I just look at myself, like I'd be really hard 1078 01:34:14.560 --> 01:34:19.800 on myself about just everyday life. Like Jazmine, you're not doing enough, 1079 01:34:19.840 --> 01:34:24.119 You're not doing enough, and it's like, I have to again, I 1080 01:34:24.119 --> 01:34:27.840 have to catch myself in those moments. You're doing a lot, baby girl, 1081 01:34:28.439 --> 01:34:31.000 You're doing a lot. You're doing good, You're doing great. You're 1082 01:34:31.000 --> 01:34:38.159 doing fan fucking tastic, Jazzmine, And that must be the thirteen year old 1083 01:34:38.239 --> 01:34:41.840 me saying that, because like, and that's the thing. Thirteen year old 1084 01:34:41.920 --> 01:34:45.600 Jazzmin would love me. She would be like, oh my god, like 1085 01:34:45.680 --> 01:34:47.039 she's so dope, Like I want to hang with her, like that's my 1086 01:34:47.119 --> 01:34:51.079 big sister. Like that's how I know. That's how I know, Like, 1087 01:34:53.119 --> 01:34:59.039 that's how I know. So I'm doing fan fucking tastic. Life is 1088 01:34:59.079 --> 01:35:02.000 gonna happen, problems are gonna be there, all of that shit. But 1089 01:35:03.079 --> 01:35:11.479 I am very proud of myself. I'm proud of my growth spiritually, mentally, 1090 01:35:11.880 --> 01:35:18.399 emotionally, as a woman, as a mother, just as a dope 1091 01:35:18.479 --> 01:35:27.399 ass individual. So like, I am very proud of myself, Like I'm 1092 01:35:27.479 --> 01:35:34.000 kind of myself, Like no for real though, Like I'm that girl period. 1093 01:35:34.079 --> 01:35:42.600 Okay mm hmmmm. So yeah, but that's it. That's that's all 1094 01:35:42.680 --> 01:35:45.199 that I have for y'all. Hope that y'all really enjoyed this episode. Let's 1095 01:35:45.199 --> 01:35:53.119 look at let's let's look at the stats. Let's look at the really quick 1096 01:35:54.319 --> 01:35:57.760 see how we're doing in life. What do the likes say, what other 1097 01:35:57.880 --> 01:36:01.279 views say? That stuff means nothing, guys, but we're gonna check it 1098 01:36:01.319 --> 01:36:09.840 out anyway. So that first video we're now at three hundred and forty views. 1099 01:36:10.119 --> 01:36:14.399 That second video is at three hundred and six views. Where's the third 1100 01:36:14.479 --> 01:36:20.159 video gonna be at? Until next time? On Dragon ball Z, we're out