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When a consequence has not worked.
We know that because your son keeps repeating

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the inappropriate behavior and yesterday we said
don' t change the consequence so fast

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wait good. Normally you have to
maintain the consequence because if you punished the

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video game today and didn' t
care and didn' t do the homework

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anyway and you trade the video game
for the bike, it won' t

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work out, nor at least by
probabilities law. It' s not gonna

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work out because no one cares about
sacrificing a thing one day. You need

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to keep the same consequence for several
ors because it' s going to come

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a time where you' re already
going to care about the video game,

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oh, if it was the bike, you' re going to care about

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playing with the bike and when you
really want to do what you took away

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is when the behavior is going to
change. And that' s when,

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you' re actually going to realize
if the consequence works, but if every

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day you go away with the pretend
that that thing you took off didn'

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t matter to him and you trade
it for something else, the feeling you

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' re going to have is that
you already ended up taking everything away and

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anyway, the behavior doesn' t
change. You' re gonna have a

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lot of frustration. You' re
gonna get the feeling that I took everything

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away from him and nothing matters to
him, but you weren' t really

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consistent with anything. And one of
the rules of education is consistency. So

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be patient and one thing just keep
it, for at least two or three

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weeks before concluding that that consequence did
not work. Whenever you want to solve

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a problem, of whatever kind and
with whomever. You do things in a

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way that doesn' t work out. You try it the same way again,

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it doesn' t work out and
you keep trying it the same way

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and it doesn' t work out. It doesn' t go that way,

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even if you think about it,
and think about it, and you

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keep believing with all the logic of
the world that that would be the best

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solution. If you don' t
get the change, it means that it

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doesn' t go around there and
you know that it' s the worst

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Zion problem that ends up becoming your
attempt to solve part of the problem.

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So you have to do it another
way. Try it. My son is

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twenty- four years old. He
got his girlfriend pregnant. She left for

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a while to live with her and
doesn' t live with us, she

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doesn' t live with her either. He' s got a bit of

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a complicated life, but he'
s always in trouble. He' s

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always got a money problem for one
thing, for the other, he'

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s gonna pay my husband, and
I' m not my kids' dad.

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However, I don' t know
what to do anymore, I don

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' t know how to cheer him
up, how you can ask him to

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win. But here the issue is
and sometimes I support it financially, but

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sometimes I feel very committed, because
he says he left because my husband didn

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' t give him a dad'
s affection. Then I know that they

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are pretexts and is to justify the
bad decisions that he has made. But

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I' m wrong if I keep
at least supporting him morally financially. Maybe

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not anymore, but what I can
do, how complex this becomes because you

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make a clear distinction between economic support
and moral support. And I sometimes have

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a lot of doubt about what we
mean when we talk about moral support.

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Without a doubt, the doors of
our homes must be open for our children.

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Hence, our children have to live
with us eternally, there is an

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abysmal difference. One of the great
incentives that, as parents, we have

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to give our children is the clear
confidence that they know that one of the

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independence they have to achieve in life
is economic independence. And when they are

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already parents, when they made an
independence as a couple and make it or

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not in their relationship as a couple, that would not necessarily mean that they

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have to go back to our home
again as family children. Independence means taking

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charge of themselves in every way and
you say something here all the time has

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problems. He gets in trouble all
the time. And I think one of

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the schemes here is how your son
tends to make decisions, because I think

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that' s where he gets stuck, because being constantly in trouble is intimately

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related to the way we make decisions. What it takes into consideration when making

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decisions is impulsive and clearly, one
of the things that helps us make better

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decisions is to be economically restricted,
because when we have easy access to money,

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either because it doesn' t make
it easy for someone, because it

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helps us to have money in an
easy way and not necessarily because we gain

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it by working, because we easily
get involved in situations that seem like easy

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ways out. When we work it
out and earn it from the sweat on

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our forehead, we' re much
more careful where we' re going to

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deposit that money we earned. So
yes. I think sometimes restricting the money

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and not making it easier makes the
person unable to get involved in situations.

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What is moral support to tell someone
to see I believe in you and I

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can help you come and make me
think and that you can hear opinions that

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I can give you with the coldest
head so that you can decide the pros

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and cons of the circumstances that come
before you, because you probably decide impulsively,

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Who you hear when you have to
make a decision, where you go

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when you have to make a decision, which you take into consideration. Because,

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at the end of the day,
he has an ex and he has

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a son, a son, a
daughter, this thing that tells you about

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me, I left here because he
didn' t give me father' s

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affection. How he would see a
father' s affection, because this father

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who is your husband would say yes
to what he wants. And since you

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didn' t say yes to what
he wants, then you feel that you

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don' t get affection, how
do you see translated that affection? So

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I think there' s a number
of things to rethink, because you have

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a 24- year- old son
who sounds like he' s not a

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mature person. So what if he
doesn' t get what he wants,

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then he doesn' t get the
support he needs to give himself or he

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would want to receive then abused a
little, what it means or how it

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translates support, moral support. You
make a presence in his life. That

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' s to give moral support,
how he wants to see it translated into

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fact. That' s another topic. Many times we have talked here about

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crying and how suddenly we have to
teach children to deal a little bit with

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crying. However, it' s
very important to understand that when we have

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a little one and I' m
talking here about a baby who cries a

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lot that we do, whatever we
do, crying is a constant that you

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' ve already changed it, that
you' ve already eaten, that you

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' ve changed your position and that
the crying doesn' t stop. It

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is very important always before any educational
strategy you see your doctor. There are

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many medical causes of which crying warns
us that this baby has to be cared

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for because something may be happening to
him. Let us always remember that a

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little child is born without language and, therefore, cannot tell us I have

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pain. There are discomforts that are
part of an educational process that your little

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one has to adapt to and has
to learn to relate to. But there

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are other discomforts that are telling us
that your little one is sick and requires

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medical attention, and that it'
s not just that you' re rocking

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him or that you' re carrying
him or that you' re giving him

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affection, because love doesn' t
cure him. Everything requires medical attention.

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So, before resorting to educational strategies, we first rule out that physiologically,

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your baby is healthy. So come
and give her the medical attention or welcome

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tari. The couple' s problems
can be a challenge or it' s

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just a disagreement to resolve. It' s two o' clock. It

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' s two o' clock,
we' ve got two problems. Yeah,

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not in the aspect of what a
challenge is, because here I'

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m going to see what my skills
are. We have seen it later on

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what my skills are and what my
efficiencies are. Of course the skills are,

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because I' m going to put
them in front, but my incompetences,

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my vulnerable parts, I don'
t want to see them, but

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that gives us a great opportunity.
It' s a challenge And it'

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s also a challenge to talk to
the couple about what' s going on.

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Not one thing is to chanclars,
to shouts, etcetera. And another

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thing is to sit down because you' ll find out what' s going

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on. There are many and there
are other things where the hour agreements were

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broken that become a problem. Not
the monetary agreements, the social agreements,

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the sexual agreements, the agreements on
how to educate, etcetera. Then you

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have to readjust, you have to
sit down and every contract we make or

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every agreement, in my opinion,
has to be reviewed every time, because

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we have changed and we have to
review the different conditions. I' ve

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grown up, I' ve seen
et cetera. Then yes, we can

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resume the agreements. It' s
not what we had five years ago and

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we won' t see it again, let' s get back to your

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perspective on life and you' ve
grown up. What about this whole theme

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of aspiring to happy endings. Notice
that no doubt people, in general terms,

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aspire to happy endings in life.
However, reality does end up imposing

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necessary endings on us. No one
would want that, but on many occasions

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we will need to resort to ends
that are needed and that are not the

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happy endings of life. In fact, sometimes the happy ending, for example,

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of fairy tale is and were happy
until death separates it, not that

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it is the great promise of love
of a couple and, if we think

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it very crudely, it is a
couple that came to the end, for

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it is until one of the two
faults, because it is law of life.

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But at the end of the day, this relationship ends with the death

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of one of the two. And
even though it' s sad for the

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death of one of them. We
find it nice to think that the couple

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managed to get to that moment where
there is no other alternative. But sometimes

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along the way we have to end
up making decisions because a couple relationship,

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for example, had no choice but
to end before death separated him. Sometimes

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a job has to be left because
there was a personal cut. Sometimes a

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friendship ended because there was some betrayal, because someone went to live elsewhere and

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suddenly, well, the distance made
the relationship go out. Anyway, what

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happened in your life when you had
to finish something because that was necessary And

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what let you notice that one of
the ideas that we have to learn to

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fight in the good sense of the
word is to men as a single homogeneous

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group and women as that other homogeneous
group of people. Not all men are

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equal, though they are eclipsed,
and all women are equal, though it

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also sounds the same as cliché,
because things are not so. There are

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many different men among themselves, as
we see, many different women among themselves,

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and suddenly these classifications appear that seem
to make us all enter into the

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same group, even within non-
feminist or non- feminist classifications, as

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if within feminists. All feminists will
think the same way. And there are

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so many subgroups of feminists, there
are so many groups of machisms, there

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are so many different misogyny types within
the extinct systems of machismo. In short,

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and in these processes, people differ
in many different ways. And notice

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that in these contexts, without a
doubt, you have to learn to know

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what defines you and how and how
you define who you are and what you

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look like, who you are,
who you identify with, but also how

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and how and who you differ from, Even if you are part of a

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certain family, even if you take
with certain people and from there, how

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and how you form your own identity. One of the questions that remains surprising

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is the automatic response that is presented
on social networks when videos are uploaded especially

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of influencers, of youtubers, which
have a great impact many followers and suddenly

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you start to see the answers.
It is not enough for any of these

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to have a bit of grace,
sympathy, to say things in a funny

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way or to grasp some idea or
some cliché that is some popular idea,

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and to do so in a friendly
insistence, to then begin to see the

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reactions and the answers. Where there
is zero self- critical ability, when

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we educate self- criticism from very
small in our children, What is this

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ability to make our children think,
What implication has that which is said only

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because it is said by someone who
has many followers or someone who is famous

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and only because that person said it
already in automatic. That becomes true,

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or it becomes worthy to be applauded, but without considering what is behind it

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and what meaning it acquires in your
children self- criticism. What do you

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think that means and how do you
think that is reversed if it' s

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about you and how it makes you
feel, because self- criticism is going

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to be important all your life.
Well, then, it' s time

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to tell them until tomorrow, god
E, chayo busquets, this is chayo

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conti higo Audio Center