WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:11.759 This is pod Populi Podcast for the People, the Great Love Debate. It's 2 00:00:11.800 --> 00:00:18.199 the Great Love Debate, the Great Love Debate. It's a Great Love Debate. 3 00:00:18.559 --> 00:00:23.199 Hi again, Everyone's Brian Howe. Welcome to the Great Love Debate, 4 00:00:23.239 --> 00:00:28.160 the world's number one dating and relationship podcast since two thousand and fifteen. I 5 00:00:28.239 --> 00:00:33.399 am here in I'm outside the actually the very fine studios of pod Populi Podcast 6 00:00:33.479 --> 00:00:37.920 for the People. It's very crowded with podcasters in there, and I was 7 00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.880 kicked out, so I'm It's not like I own the place, and I 8 00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.560 um so I'm sitting outside recording on the mic. People are walking by listening 9 00:00:46.560 --> 00:00:52.240 to me. So be it. So About a week ago, I'm flipping 10 00:00:52.359 --> 00:00:57.200 through channels on a Jet Blue flight. Jeff Blue's gone bad in a lot 11 00:00:57.240 --> 00:01:00.799 of ways, but they still have the TVs UM and I usually don't watch 12 00:01:00.840 --> 00:01:04.000 TV on the flight because Jeff Blue has WiFi, and I would rather be 13 00:01:04.040 --> 00:01:07.079 online than on TV because I'd like to get some things done. But anyway, 14 00:01:07.319 --> 00:01:12.439 I'm flipping around. I stumble upon TBS and they are showing probably for 15 00:01:12.439 --> 00:01:18.480 the millionth time, Jerry McGuire, and so I got sucked in for a 16 00:01:18.480 --> 00:01:21.359 minute. I hadn't seen Jerry McGuire in a while, and Jerry McGuire is 17 00:01:21.920 --> 00:01:26.359 great. It still holds up, and there's a lot in there to think 18 00:01:26.400 --> 00:01:30.239 about, especially what's his name, keep going, Junior. The relationship with 19 00:01:30.280 --> 00:01:34.480 his family is really good, and his wife is really strong. I just 20 00:01:34.840 --> 00:01:38.480 there's lots through that movie and it still holds up. There's a lot to 21 00:01:38.519 --> 00:01:42.959 break down and otherwise enjoy. But a few things struck me about it. 22 00:01:42.400 --> 00:01:47.719 So first of all, that movie is over twenty five years old, and 23 00:01:47.840 --> 00:01:49.599 so there's probably some of you who are like, that's an old movie. 24 00:01:49.640 --> 00:01:53.480 I've never seen that, But twenty five years old for Jerry McGuire is like 25 00:01:53.599 --> 00:01:59.280 Jesus. Secondly, Tom Cruise is the biggest movie star of the last forty 26 00:01:59.359 --> 00:02:04.200 years, and I don't think there's any arguing that. From Risky Business through 27 00:02:04.280 --> 00:02:07.800 the Latest Mission Impossible. And no matter when you're listening to this show, 28 00:02:07.800 --> 00:02:10.840 whether you're listening to it in twenty twenty three or twenty twenty seven, I'm 29 00:02:10.840 --> 00:02:15.199 sure we could say the latest Mission Impossible movie because I'm sure he's going to 30 00:02:15.280 --> 00:02:21.120 keep making them. But for forty years he has been a huge, huge 31 00:02:21.159 --> 00:02:24.240 star and almost everybody agrees, you always want to see a Tom Cruise movie. 32 00:02:24.280 --> 00:02:30.400 It is what it is. But a couple other things struck me about 33 00:02:30.680 --> 00:02:37.240 Jerry McGuire. First of all, Tom Cruise a little bit of a sidebar, 34 00:02:37.360 --> 00:02:42.800 handsome, still looks great, famous, wealthy, He's never really been 35 00:02:42.800 --> 00:02:47.520 in the dating pool. He's married very young to a quite a bit older 36 00:02:47.560 --> 00:02:53.599 Mimi Rodgers. And then he went immediately into Nicole Kidman, and then he 37 00:02:53.680 --> 00:02:58.280 went into Katie Holmes. And all of those have sort of their own backstory 38 00:02:58.360 --> 00:03:02.199 and strange story, and this is scientology, bashing observation. Believe what you 39 00:03:02.199 --> 00:03:06.800 want to believe, and to each their own. But post Katie Holmes, 40 00:03:07.080 --> 00:03:12.439 he spent the last decade quote unquote focused on his career. I'm not sure 41 00:03:12.520 --> 00:03:15.759 Tom Cruise was ever not focused on his career, but he wasn't really in 42 00:03:15.800 --> 00:03:19.000 the dating pool and isn't in the dating pool. So bravo for him, 43 00:03:19.319 --> 00:03:22.639 and all the better for us because we get I think great movies because he's 44 00:03:22.639 --> 00:03:29.240 not focused on distractions. I'll call him distractions. But I was thinking, 45 00:03:29.280 --> 00:03:34.919 how would he have done in the dating pool. He's short, sorry, 46 00:03:35.039 --> 00:03:38.240 but the shallow ladies who listened to this podcast have issues with that, and 47 00:03:38.319 --> 00:03:44.400 he has a personality that is a combination of intensity and fake laughs. So 48 00:03:44.439 --> 00:03:46.000 how would that do on a dinner date? I don't think so well. 49 00:03:47.759 --> 00:03:52.960 But away from Tom cruising back to Jerry McGuire. Second, let me get 50 00:03:52.960 --> 00:03:59.520 back to Jerry McGuire. Jerry McGuire has three all time great lines in it 51 00:03:59.719 --> 00:04:09.199 through memorable quotable part of the American lexicon, show me the money, you 52 00:04:09.280 --> 00:04:14.400 complete me and you had me at Hello. Say any of the three and 53 00:04:14.479 --> 00:04:17.000 you know exactly where they came from. Props to Cameron Crowe. He has 54 00:04:17.079 --> 00:04:21.519 written some great movies. He won an Oscar for almost famous. But all 55 00:04:21.639 --> 00:04:27.199 of us who have made our living writing hope to write one memorable or quotable 56 00:04:27.279 --> 00:04:30.360 line. And he got three in a ninety minute sequence, and two of 57 00:04:30.399 --> 00:04:35.600 them are in one scene. That's amazing. But the other thing I noticed 58 00:04:35.600 --> 00:04:41.040 watching Jerry McGuire again that's relevant to the Great Love debate, is how they 59 00:04:41.439 --> 00:04:48.199 met. He was her boss and convinced her to leave, and eventually became 60 00:04:48.639 --> 00:04:51.319 close to her, working a bunch of late nights, and then one night 61 00:04:53.240 --> 00:04:57.000 he makes a move. I mean, would that fly today? I say, 62 00:04:57.079 --> 00:05:00.680 Jerry McGuire holds up. But could you make that movie today? Is 63 00:05:00.720 --> 00:05:04.600 that no longer? Okay? Can we even have that in the movies anymore? 64 00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:09.279 I don't know. I don't think you can. That really sucks. 65 00:05:10.480 --> 00:05:15.240 And if someone said, hey, how did you guys meet, and the 66 00:05:15.319 --> 00:05:19.920 answer is or was we worked together? Well for most of our American existence, 67 00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:26.160 that was a very common and completely normal answer. It's the way most 68 00:05:26.199 --> 00:05:30.279 people met. They worked together. It's been fifty hours a week with somebody. 69 00:05:30.519 --> 00:05:34.279 That's your dating pool. So I don't want to get into dating in 70 00:05:34.319 --> 00:05:38.480 the dating dating in the work pool today, but I want to get into 71 00:05:38.600 --> 00:05:44.399 that how we met and how a great line can figure into all of that. 72 00:05:44.720 --> 00:05:46.360 So let's meet again in sixty seconds or so, a little early on 73 00:05:46.439 --> 00:05:48.480 the break time today, but I gotta do it. I gotta take a 74 00:05:48.560 --> 00:05:54.040 quick break. We will be back with some semi great lines and a whole 75 00:05:54.079 --> 00:06:03.959 lot more right after this, and we are back. So a question that 76 00:06:04.079 --> 00:06:11.600 everyone likes to ask is how did you guys meet? I get it, 77 00:06:11.879 --> 00:06:15.360 I've gotten it, you've gotten it. We all get it. And I 78 00:06:15.360 --> 00:06:20.000 think people ask that for three reasons. I think A I think they have 79 00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:26.279 a genuine curiosity. I think people are like, where does a nuclear physicist 80 00:06:26.360 --> 00:06:30.040 meet a circus clown? They see something in the two of you that doesn't 81 00:06:30.120 --> 00:06:34.319 quite fit. So they were wondering how did these two worlds collide? And 82 00:06:34.360 --> 00:06:40.240 I think they're interested in that, legitimately interested. Secondly, they want to 83 00:06:40.240 --> 00:06:44.000 know because they want to know how it might help them. You guys met 84 00:06:44.040 --> 00:06:46.600 at a comic book convention? Is that where I should go to meet a 85 00:06:46.600 --> 00:06:53.879 guy? Because you think their relationship is or can be a roadmap to your 86 00:06:53.920 --> 00:06:56.680 own pot of gold. That's why you ask. You're like, how did 87 00:06:56.680 --> 00:06:58.480 you do it? This is how I'll do it. I'll copy that and 88 00:06:58.560 --> 00:07:03.839 that'll work. Maybe not. But thirdly, I think they want to hear 89 00:07:03.879 --> 00:07:09.959 how you met because they're hoping for a swoonable story. I think they really 90 00:07:10.000 --> 00:07:15.399 want to hear a meat cute that will melt their heart. And I'm as 91 00:07:15.399 --> 00:07:19.360 guilty of that as anyone, not of asking the question, but of seeking 92 00:07:19.399 --> 00:07:23.480 it, and to a big degree, for a big chunk of my life 93 00:07:24.360 --> 00:07:29.120 chasing it. So I am a storyteller by nature, That's what I have 94 00:07:29.240 --> 00:07:33.199 done for a living. I always want to entertain. So I was always 95 00:07:33.279 --> 00:07:39.639 in my twenties and in my thirties, obsessed with having the greatest here is 96 00:07:39.639 --> 00:07:43.199 how we met story ever. And I met some women who share that I 97 00:07:43.240 --> 00:07:46.360 haven't met too many men who have that I really want to be here is 98 00:07:46.399 --> 00:07:48.959 how we met to be the greatest story ever. And I would bail out 99 00:07:48.959 --> 00:07:55.279 of relationships too early because I didn't like how mundane the meeting was. We 100 00:07:55.319 --> 00:07:58.959 met through a neighbor. Eh oh hum that that just didn't quite do it 101 00:07:59.000 --> 00:08:01.720 for me. One time, my neighbor in New York she's like, I 102 00:08:01.800 --> 00:08:03.319 want to introduce you to somebody. I'm like, no, no, that'll 103 00:08:03.319 --> 00:08:09.480 be a terrible meeting. And I would stay in terrible relationships too long because 104 00:08:09.519 --> 00:08:15.680 how we met was too valuable an asset to me to toss away. So 105 00:08:15.759 --> 00:08:20.000 one time, years ago, I was in a bar in Stamford, Connecticut. 106 00:08:20.120 --> 00:08:24.600 It's just side of here and just forty five miles northeast of New York 107 00:08:24.639 --> 00:08:28.399 City. And this girl comes up to me in the bar and she goes 108 00:08:28.120 --> 00:08:35.600 David, and I said yeah, and she says I'm Caroline, Sorry I'm 109 00:08:35.679 --> 00:08:39.679 late. And it dawned on me after a few seconds. This is a 110 00:08:39.679 --> 00:08:45.320 blind date and she has no idea what David looks like or what or who 111 00:08:45.360 --> 00:08:46.559 I am? But I'm a little drunk, so I'm like, fuck it, 112 00:08:46.720 --> 00:08:50.399 Let's let's see how long I can keep this going online dating. That 113 00:08:50.480 --> 00:08:52.960 is one advantage. You at least get somewhat of a picture of the like 114 00:08:54.000 --> 00:08:54.919 I say, an accurate picture, but he gets so out of a picture. 115 00:08:54.919 --> 00:08:58.440 But apparently she was hooked up with somebody named David and told him me 116 00:08:58.480 --> 00:09:00.600 to the bar at a certain time. She was a little late. Oh 117 00:09:00.639 --> 00:09:03.080 well, so I was like, all right, let's roll with this. 118 00:09:05.200 --> 00:09:07.639 So ten minutes in, she's like, how do you know Lisa and Tom? 119 00:09:07.720 --> 00:09:11.000 And I'm like, oh, Tom, and I go way back and 120 00:09:11.120 --> 00:09:13.440 Lisa's just great and blah blah blah, and hey, you want to go 121 00:09:13.440 --> 00:09:16.000 to this cool place around the corner, because first of all, yes, 122 00:09:16.080 --> 00:09:20.360 I'm going to steal the blind date, and second I'm fucked if David actually 123 00:09:20.360 --> 00:09:24.559 shows up and fuck him, because apparently he was even later than she was, 124 00:09:24.639 --> 00:09:30.720 so too bad. So anyway, we go somewhere else and she is 125 00:09:30.919 --> 00:09:35.799 laughing and loving the date and she is awesome, and around eleven PM, 126 00:09:35.840 --> 00:09:37.480 I'm like I decided to tell her. I don't know why, but I 127 00:09:37.519 --> 00:09:41.840 decided to sort of come clean. I thought it was risky, but I 128 00:09:41.879 --> 00:09:45.360 thought it would help me. I thought she would think this is so ballsy, 129 00:09:46.720 --> 00:09:50.519 And you know what she did. She loved it. She laughed about 130 00:09:50.600 --> 00:09:54.919 it, and we laughed about what a poor asshole David must be. Blah 131 00:09:54.960 --> 00:09:58.279 blah blah. We toasted Lisa and Tom, who I did not know, 132 00:09:58.320 --> 00:10:03.039 who apparently got us to this position where we had met. And so we 133 00:10:03.080 --> 00:10:07.960 start dating and I cannot wait to get married and have kids with her, 134 00:10:07.000 --> 00:10:11.080 because all I could think about is I want the kids to know how cool 135 00:10:11.240 --> 00:10:15.840 Dad was for stealing mom in a blind date, the greatest story ever. 136 00:10:16.240 --> 00:10:20.720 But three months into it, the relationship isn't quite as good and things aren't 137 00:10:20.799 --> 00:10:24.759 quite as blissful, and she starts to get super annoyed with me because of 138 00:10:24.840 --> 00:10:28.279 the time I'm sure I was super annoying, and she would start to say 139 00:10:28.320 --> 00:10:33.399 things like I bet you David wouldn't have done that and so on. So 140 00:10:33.480 --> 00:10:37.399 in the back of her mind she never quite got over the fact that I 141 00:10:37.480 --> 00:10:43.159 reached in and fucked with her dating fate and her sliding doors moment, and 142 00:10:43.240 --> 00:10:46.519 somehow it didn't turn out also great for her. She didn't care as much 143 00:10:46.519 --> 00:10:50.480 about the cute story as I did. So we broke up. She wasn't 144 00:10:50.519 --> 00:10:52.600 as enamored or obsessed with it. Wasn't that cool back in the day when 145 00:10:52.600 --> 00:10:58.879 I stold you that she didn't fucking care anymore. Say levee, not to 146 00:10:58.000 --> 00:11:01.320 get too much to my own sort of dating history. There's a point here. 147 00:11:01.720 --> 00:11:05.840 But another time I went out on a date and me and this girl 148 00:11:05.879 --> 00:11:07.360 went to dinner, and then we went to a bar to meet her friend, 149 00:11:07.600 --> 00:11:11.759 and I woke up with the friend and we started dating. I started 150 00:11:11.840 --> 00:11:16.240 dating the friend and people would ask how we met, and she would answer 151 00:11:16.320 --> 00:11:20.679 through friends, and I'm like, that's not exactly how this happened. And 152 00:11:20.720 --> 00:11:24.039 then we would argue about how much to reveal that didn't make her look like 153 00:11:24.120 --> 00:11:28.840 both a bad friend and a total hoe. So why do I bring this 154 00:11:28.960 --> 00:11:35.200 up? Because how people met matters to you, and I think it matters 155 00:11:35.279 --> 00:11:41.080 to me. On a Sunday, A lot of you have read the wedding 156 00:11:41.120 --> 00:11:43.399 section of New York Times. I think they called the vows section, and 157 00:11:43.879 --> 00:11:50.360 you can spend hours pouring over that because it spins a little tale of how 158 00:11:50.399 --> 00:11:56.279 people met, and I think that's entertaining. But the downside of that particular 159 00:11:56.320 --> 00:12:01.639 column is, for some reason, they always throw in a sad sentence into 160 00:12:01.679 --> 00:12:05.039 the mix. Either at the end they'll tell the long story and then I'll 161 00:12:05.080 --> 00:12:11.039 say the bridegroom's first marriage ended in divorce, or they'll lead it with Jenny 162 00:12:11.120 --> 00:12:15.399 thought after her first marriage ended badly that she would never find love again. 163 00:12:15.840 --> 00:12:18.360 And I always read that, I'm like, why do they have to put 164 00:12:18.399 --> 00:12:24.159 that in there? Why put the specter looming over the whole thing of breaking 165 00:12:24.240 --> 00:12:28.919 up or having broken up or having bad relationships into what should be a little 166 00:12:28.240 --> 00:12:33.679 three paragraph fairy tale. And that's what all of these hope to be, 167 00:12:33.960 --> 00:12:37.759 these stories, my stories, your stories, a little fairytale. We meet 168 00:12:37.840 --> 00:12:41.600 cute and then hopefully we get to happily ever after. So I did a 169 00:12:41.639 --> 00:12:45.639 quick browsing of some of them in the New York Times last week after this 170 00:12:45.679 --> 00:12:48.080 all got started with the Jerry McGuire and I want to think about meeting and 171 00:12:48.120 --> 00:12:50.159 I want to share it with you guys, And some are similar to mine. 172 00:12:50.240 --> 00:12:54.600 So just to read a couple. Kelly Carter's fantasies of meeting a man 173 00:12:54.879 --> 00:13:01.440 while shopping for almond milk took a bad seat when Marino Mccaplan and unexpectedly commented 174 00:13:01.519 --> 00:13:07.000 on her tweet, so you get a modern love and modern technology, and 175 00:13:07.080 --> 00:13:09.559 it kind of threw off her dreams. And then she met who she met, 176 00:13:09.879 --> 00:13:11.600 so she was like me, she wanted this cute almond milk story. 177 00:13:11.759 --> 00:13:15.159 I don't even know if that's cute. That's what she wanted, and then 178 00:13:15.200 --> 00:13:20.240 the tweet changed your life. Good for the tweet. Another one. Sarah 179 00:13:20.360 --> 00:13:24.960 Gwen and Eric Coon's connection grew slowly during early morning meetups at Brooklyn cafes. 180 00:13:26.360 --> 00:13:30.559 Now they are partners in life and at Gwynn Coffee supply founded by Miss Gwen. 181 00:13:31.360 --> 00:13:33.000 So I read that, I'm like, does that count as a good 182 00:13:33.000 --> 00:13:37.879 old fashioned workplace romance or do they just say I can help with your business. 183 00:13:37.919 --> 00:13:41.320 I don't know, maybe, and I kind of like it. Another 184 00:13:41.360 --> 00:13:48.399 one. Ross oo Rick and Jessica Carter Altman, the daughter of Linda Carter 185 00:13:48.480 --> 00:13:52.759 Altman, who played Wonder Woman in the nineteen seventies, expected their encounter to 186 00:13:52.879 --> 00:13:56.879 be brief, and it was not. That's the way their wedding things started 187 00:13:56.960 --> 00:13:58.919 up. So I have some issues with that one. On the downside, 188 00:14:00.080 --> 00:14:03.279 I'm sure miss Carter didn't like growing up in the shadow of her famous and 189 00:14:05.240 --> 00:14:07.720 definitely beautiful mom, so I'm not sure why mom has to be in the 190 00:14:07.759 --> 00:14:13.799 first sentence of the wedding story. On the other hand, Linda Carter has 191 00:14:13.799 --> 00:14:18.759 aged stunningly, so props on the road ahead for Ross Urick on his wedding 192 00:14:18.799 --> 00:14:24.360 day. I'll give you one more. After a year long dating hiatus, 193 00:14:24.399 --> 00:14:30.519 cautiously embracing something new, friendship came naturally to Andy Flower and Veronica Savage, 194 00:14:30.679 --> 00:14:35.200 but romance was difficult to see. Yet they persisted all the way to the 195 00:14:35.279 --> 00:14:39.919 yacht rock dating altar. So there's a lot to unpack in this one. 196 00:14:39.960 --> 00:14:41.679 But if you if you the opening sentence, if the opening sentence of your 197 00:14:41.679 --> 00:14:50.080 wedding announcement contains the words dating, hiatus, cautiously, difficult, and persisted, 198 00:14:50.639 --> 00:14:54.240 I think these two got to file the divorce papers now. And I 199 00:14:54.320 --> 00:14:58.080 say that as someone who loves yacht rock and would love a yacht rock wedding. 200 00:14:58.080 --> 00:15:01.600 I don't care how much Christopher Cross is on your soundtrack. This whole 201 00:15:01.639 --> 00:15:07.799 relationship seems like it needs a therapist couch, particularly her. But these stories, 202 00:15:09.519 --> 00:15:13.000 or any stories, don't have quite as much relevance to me now because 203 00:15:13.039 --> 00:15:18.200 going back to Jerry McGuire, I think now, as I record this in 204 00:15:18.240 --> 00:15:22.799 twenty twenty three, I think I came rover about the line. The great 205 00:15:22.960 --> 00:15:28.879 line because more than half of relationships now are beginning online, and we met 206 00:15:28.919 --> 00:15:33.840 online is never going to be a great story. Sorry, I you know, 207 00:15:33.919 --> 00:15:37.039 not to throw another one of my dating stretches. Back in the day, 208 00:15:37.039 --> 00:15:37.759 back in the match dot com days, I went out with a girl 209 00:15:37.799 --> 00:15:41.120 I met on match dot com. I'm just couldn't get over the fact that 210 00:15:41.120 --> 00:15:43.159 I met her on match dot com. I'm like, what a loser she's 211 00:15:43.159 --> 00:15:45.480 on match dot com. Even though I found her on match dot com. 212 00:15:45.480 --> 00:15:48.679 That's how fucked up I was. But I never really got over like we 213 00:15:48.720 --> 00:15:52.720 met online. It just seemed too boring for me. But even if you 214 00:15:52.799 --> 00:15:58.200 meet online, that's where the silver lining is. Meeting online has to begin 215 00:15:58.639 --> 00:16:04.279 with a great conversation, and a great conversation I believe either starts with or 216 00:16:04.360 --> 00:16:11.399 contains a really inspiring line. Somebody said something. So now when I ask 217 00:16:11.440 --> 00:16:15.639 a couple of how they met, I always want to know what did he 218 00:16:15.759 --> 00:16:19.200 say as an opener, what words did he used to stand out from the 219 00:16:19.240 --> 00:16:26.440 crowd, or if it's bumble, what did she say? Because it absolutely 220 00:16:26.440 --> 00:16:30.240 matters. You know, two thirds or so of opening lines online are either 221 00:16:30.639 --> 00:16:38.480 hey, hi, or the worst one, how is your day? And 222 00:16:38.679 --> 00:16:44.840 none of those none of those have ever led to or will ever lead to 223 00:16:45.279 --> 00:16:48.279 marriage. Zero none. I don't have the facts to back that up, 224 00:16:48.320 --> 00:16:52.919 but I'm gonna say that's true. So you got to rethink that, all 225 00:16:52.960 --> 00:16:56.600 you guys. If you're leading with that, you'll never find a couple who 226 00:16:56.639 --> 00:17:00.600 says, well, they said hey, and I responded and now are engaged. 227 00:17:00.879 --> 00:17:03.039 You're just not gonna find that. So you may not need a great 228 00:17:03.039 --> 00:17:08.200 story to find eternal happiness. And maybe you had me at hello. It's 229 00:17:08.240 --> 00:17:11.240 probably used in online dating, which you should not use that either. But 230 00:17:11.480 --> 00:17:15.920 something similar to that, or as evolved is that is probably beyond your conversational 231 00:17:15.920 --> 00:17:21.480 capability, and mine too. So wato I bring this all up? I 232 00:17:21.559 --> 00:17:23.839 think because now we're at a point where the actions when it comes to dating, 233 00:17:25.200 --> 00:17:29.960 don't speak louder than the words. I think the words are the story 234 00:17:30.039 --> 00:17:33.640 now, so you got to make the words matter, and you got to 235 00:17:33.680 --> 00:17:38.319 make a memorable In ten years, your kids will assume you met through some 236 00:17:38.440 --> 00:17:44.440 sort of technology, virtual dating or an app or social media. They won't 237 00:17:44.480 --> 00:17:48.279 ask how you met mom? They will ask what did you say to get 238 00:17:48.319 --> 00:17:51.880 mom's attention? Because kids are very big into that. What did you do 239 00:17:51.960 --> 00:17:59.279 to separate yourself from this sea of other people? How did you ask mom 240 00:17:59.279 --> 00:18:03.480 out? What was the line? What were the words? And not everybody 241 00:18:03.559 --> 00:18:08.680 is eloquent, and not everybody's particularly quippy or witty. Because I've always said 242 00:18:08.720 --> 00:18:11.119 knock knock has as good a chance to work as anything else, because you're 243 00:18:11.119 --> 00:18:14.680 probably gonna get an answer, because they're gonna be like, how could this 244 00:18:14.759 --> 00:18:18.680 jackass come out with knock knock? The curiosity will kill them and they'll want 245 00:18:18.720 --> 00:18:21.240 to know. They'll say who is there? And then you go from there. 246 00:18:21.319 --> 00:18:25.119 But anyway, you can overcome not being that original or any of this 247 00:18:25.160 --> 00:18:36.240 stuff with sincerity and honesty and originality. Hey, that's nothing, Hi, 248 00:18:36.759 --> 00:18:45.000 that's lazy. How is your day completely pointless? To our dreams of me 249 00:18:45.039 --> 00:18:48.559 and a girl or you and a guy fighting over a parking space and then 250 00:18:48.559 --> 00:18:52.119 falling in love romcom style? I think they absolutely can and should remain. 251 00:18:52.319 --> 00:19:00.200 But most meetings are a lot less interesting than that. So let's make the 252 00:19:00.240 --> 00:19:04.359 words matter, make those the one you talk about for generations, the ones 253 00:19:04.400 --> 00:19:08.279 to impress your friends, the ones to tell your kids. A lot of 254 00:19:08.319 --> 00:19:12.240 relationships do start with showing me the money, but those aren't romantic. Those 255 00:19:12.279 --> 00:19:17.920 mostly happened in Vegas and you had me at hello. I think you need 256 00:19:17.960 --> 00:19:21.440 to have a whole lot words before and after hello to make the Hello matter 257 00:19:21.519 --> 00:19:26.599 at all. So you got to focus on what you say, and you 258 00:19:26.640 --> 00:19:32.240 got to think about what you said. That's the new meet cute. Ask 259 00:19:32.319 --> 00:19:37.799 the next I don't know dozen couples you encounter, what was the first thing 260 00:19:37.880 --> 00:19:41.200 she said to you? What was the first thing you remember him saying? 261 00:19:42.799 --> 00:19:48.079 And their answer. It could be silly, it could be fun, It 262 00:19:48.079 --> 00:19:55.160 could even be offensive. But if they're still together, there's definitely some cute. 263 00:19:56.440 --> 00:20:00.720 It's not a mission impossible. You want more words, Give me some 264 00:20:02.799 --> 00:20:06.759 like, share, follow, Please review this podcast. Your reviews have and 265 00:20:06.839 --> 00:20:11.359 will always mean a lot in the podcasting ecosystem. Shoot us an email, 266 00:20:11.559 --> 00:20:14.319 Great Love Debate at gmail dot com. Give me your thoughts, give me 267 00:20:14.359 --> 00:20:17.680 your words, Give me the first thing you said to your significant other. 268 00:20:17.720 --> 00:20:19.680 I really want to hear those where I think we're gonna do an episode totally 269 00:20:19.680 --> 00:20:25.480 devoted to Great opening lines. Send those in Great Love Debate at gmail dot 270 00:20:25.480 --> 00:20:27.880 com. Go to Great Love Debate dot com for information on upcoming shows. 271 00:20:30.319 --> 00:20:36.359 Hopefully we'll be cute in a town near you, because, as always at 272 00:20:36.359 --> 00:20:38.839 the Great Love Debate, we never stopped making love. See you next time, 273 00:20:44.079 --> 00:20:49.400 Great Love Debate. It's a Great Love Debate, The Great Love Debate. 274 00:20:51.279 --> 00:20:52.880 It's a Great Love Debate.