In the year two thousand seven fourteen, a new squad of Opera Davis was
chosen by the College of Illusion. These fools promptly went on to frustrate their
DM at every opportunity. Today, still working together, because really, who
else would work with them? They survive as adventurers of fortune. If you
have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can
find them, maybe you can hire the Second Breakfast Club. Tony Kinney as
Eddie Falzoni, Jess Owen as a deer a Glow, Michael Cole as Urag
and Jesse Wicks as Bill Crilliance, Nico Rodriguez as your DM. Welcome back
to the continuing Tales of a Fool's Quest. All right, So next morning
you go wake up and you make your way back early, like as soon
as you can see a little bit of sunlight. You head toward the cranes.
Yeah, all right. So you get to the cranes and they let
Eddie out to go potty, but they're all still at the house. When
you're getting good boy Eddie. I want to follow Eddie, not like closely,
but when he's done doing his thing, I want to catch him on
the way back I get a sniffery p's and p there as well. But
that's the point. This is my road, bitch. I'll just kneel down
and go to Patty. Okay, Strange things happen around here, boy,
And he's like, man, what would Eddie's voice be? He's like,
yeah, now, strange things happened around here. People get eaten by shadowy
creatures. That's the after effectually be eaten. So I imagine you've explored a
good bit of this place. I've looked around, but I didn't find any
of the treasure stuff they're looking for. I'm just looking for other things.
Have you seen anything interesting? I went in and looked around the castle.
That was kind of cool. What can you tell me about the castle?
Uh? There are like fancy art and paintings and stuff like my Crane family
has around their house, those giant statues and stuff. Anyone in there?
I didn't see anyone. I got to several spots where there were doors closed
and you know, no thumbs. Oh bear, Well, thank you,
Eddie. Have a good day. Yeah, thank you, Rag he's your
goodness boy, I'm gonna shake my butt. Just do it, Eddie,
don't broadcast. I always say that. Just no one ever hearsha hmmm.
Cute. It's got music, is it? As soon as we get there,
I'm going to get in a hot pocket. Okay, so you grab
a hot pocket. Valley's like, hey guys, I, oh hey,
what's up Valley? You left me here last night? Yeah, we figured
it was safer. You know, you hit that you'd gotten ran over by
the cart, So yeah, I did. I had twisted. Yeah.
I thought it was the best if you, you know, rested here instead
of because we had a fight out there to get over to the tavern.
Oh you did? Is everyone? Okay? Yeah, we're good. You
all look really tired. My shoulders a little bruised. Well, I know
it's not the up plate. See, I was working on a ritual,
is uh? Freder around Yeah, Fraser was just getting some water from the
fountain. Yeah. See, well, why don't you tell me what you
think before he gets back, and I'm gonna show her my ritual and explain
him. So it's gonna hide us. It's gonna hide our life for us
and make it appear like we're undead to anything in the city. Oh that's
cool. During the fight, they only attacked living things like Bill and Neurag.
But when Irag was just a puddle of water, didn't bother him.
When I made an illusion, they didn't care. Maybe I should have just
hit our life for us and instead of making this appear undead zombies. That's
probably fine. She's like, I'm looking at this ritual spell you've drafted.
This is so good. I could never write something this good. I mean,
this is wild good. Yeah, I don't see how it wouldn't work.
Remember, she's like a cantrip level only lash right. Yeah. She's
like, are you gonna tell them you trapped it this last night? Because
I'm pretty sure when I was using the bathroom I heard you say that you
weren't an illusionist. Oh yeah, no, I'm gonna tell I found this
in the tavern. Oh okay, Yeah, the map that I was looking
over with Roz last night. They hadn't explored the tavern yet. Really,
they knew it was there, but they hadn't gone inside, so good deal.
Yeah, they knew the tavern was there, but they didn't go to
check it o out. Trust these people. I wrapped their own brandy,
but there could be more, but it's not their brandy. They're very posh.
Yeah, yeah, I actually got thrown the stellery. When we leave,
let's just take the brandy and leave them like the good brandy. The
Fraser comes back carrying a bucket of water. He's like, oh, good
morning, I trust you all had a wonderful evening. Yeah, I had
a good evening, Doctor Crane. Uh listen. I mean, like I
said, I'm not an illusionist. But while we were over there, I
was poking around in the office and it seems like whoever ran that tavern might
have been some kind of magician. We found this ritual diagram or whatever it
is here. I thought you might want to take a look at it.
See what you think. Well, that is fascinating. Yes, I'd love
to look at it. Let me see that. Yeah, there you go.
So he takes a look at this. I will note there's a good
chance that this was delivered there by one of the shadow creatures as a way
to try and get people to come to the town. So, even if
there was no illusionists there before, someone easily could have been attracted to this
or could have had a pull. You know, maybe maybe your friend huag
here has somehow intertwined with the spirits of Germo's gambit. Maybe not. Well,
don't illusionists kind of like mark their rituals, you know, with a
stamp. Then you say, you know that stamp from summer ready? Oh
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, there's a there's a mark on it.
You can shadow creatures would be that, right? Oh yeah, see
it seems legit. But see what you think? He looks at it,
and he's like, I'm not much of an illusionist, but it looks it
looks pretty neat. Can you tell what it'll do? No? Not really?
Damn well, well, Bill thought it might, you know, hide
us from the shadow creatures out there. So it seems like they're more attracted
to life force than anything in our experience. Do you have a similar experience
to that? We'll say that is an interesting theory. They're attracted to life
force. Fantastic make a parley thing six? Okay, yeah, no,
I think that's an interesting theory. I'd love to see it. And we're
being tested. Are you planning on using this? What? What effect will
that have on you? What is what? What effect will that have on
you? Well? I don't know. Okay, wonderful, I would love
to study it. Please use this in front of me. I would love
to document. Niles, Niles, come here, bring me my bring me
my scroll and and my quill. Niles hurry, and Niles brings it over.
He's like, I'm gonna keep this with me in my in my pocket,
and when you're ready, you just tell me and I will watch and
I will document what happens when you use this scroll. Fantastic. I'll put
it in my next book. Oh well, all right then, h should
we wait till dusk? Yeah? See so the shadow creatures don't come out
during the day right now, So I'll tell you what. I'm not sure
what kind of a search pattern or you know that you guys have been working,
but I say, you know, your group goes and does your thing.
We'll go do our thing and we'll be back around here close to sunset.
Yeah, okay, Lovely, are you going to look at the chest
that was next to the statue? Yeah, I guess we should all go
check that out first time. Yes, in the castle Roz, they're gonna
go look at the statue. We are going to go south of town.
We're gonna see if we can find the exit today. All right, We'll
see you back here around sunset. Okay, be safe you as well.
Oh are you using that thing while you're out? Oh? That no?
See if it hides u from us from the things I thought we might use
it, you know when we get back here, well hide all night.
I don't know. It seems like it'll hide several people. It's a ritual,
right, Oh, yes, I should have been more intuitive forgive me,
but mess, you know, we'll see brilliant. Come on, and
he motions Eddie, Eddie, come with us. No, I'm gonna go
with these guys. Oh yeah, I mean Eddie barks. He's like,
his name is Eddie too? Who rags along when they hears that? All
right? So what are you guys gonna go do in Valley's? Like,
do you want me to go with you or stick with us? I'm sure
you rested up enough from that getting run over by the cart thing, so
you can stick with us at the treasure chest at the tavern. Yeah,
yeah, yeah, there's a there's a desk in the manager's office. Seems
pretty secure. Okay, I'll help her with that, all right, So
you guys do that. What do the rest of you guys do? Well,
wait, and then we'll head over to the statue after that, Okay,
we have eaten something. Yep. Yeah, you all had a hot
pocket. Hot pockets, yep. Pocket. So you have a head over
to the statue and you find a chest there. You can see that it
is dented pretty hard right at the latches on the face of the chest.
It is kind of buried into the base of the statue though, so there's
not really a good leverage spot. Like maybe if she had full access to
the chest when she swung her hammer to bust it open, she could have
done that, But it's like in the ground and the base of the statue,
so there's not really a good spot to get to it. It's more
like you have to unlock it and then pull it out of the base of
the statue. Well, I don't know how to pick clocks. Seems like
a useful skill I should pick up and I don't do that either. Well,
we can. I would probably just smash it open if we drag it
out first, right, Yeah, we can't drag it out without unlocking it,
right right, got unlock it first. You have to unlock it to
drag it out of the ground, or the odds you can turn into a
termite. I'm not sure. I could do a swarm did a puddle alright,
it was worth a try. Yeah, well I could pointed giant termite.
I'm a single large giant carpenter ant antlers. How about new playing the
drum? I could do the stone horse again and just try to mule kick
it. I want to look at the statue. Is there anything the crow?
Is there anything that stands out about it at all? Make a discertained
reality role. That's ten on the dice. Okay. Its eyes are the
only thing that isn't stone. They appear to be some kind of marble.
How tall is the statue? Is it like real tall? Kind of get
up to them. It's about seven foot, but it's it's a statue.
It's got its wings like kind of folded in front of it, and it's
got like one of its legs cocked up. So you could easily climb up
this statue to get leverage on it. Yeah, I'm gonna climb up at
them and get a closer look at those eyeballs. Does it look like they're
like removable or something. It looks like they could be. Yeah, I'm
gonna start picking at him. Okay, so you start picking at him and
you find that it twists. It twists. I'm gonna twist the other one
too, Okay, So you twist them and as you're twisting these eyeballs,
they continue to twist out and out and out and out, but they never
pop out right. They're like this marble like little screw And as they do
it, you finally hear a click at the bottom of the statue. Huh.
You go ahead and try that again with the chest. Try pulling that
out. Yeah, it slides right now, we got it. Cool,
I'm gonna climb back down. What's in it? You open it up?
Try to open it? Okay? Do you open it up? And a
dart shoots out of it? As a trap is activated? So would you
like to avoid danger? To try to avoid this dart from hitting you,
sure, throw a bill in front of me. You will not strength.
That's a seven. That's dexterity, right, if that's how you want to
avoid danger, Yeah, it would be a dodge. But yeah, I
got no bonus. So it's a seven. Okay, So this actually is
already you guys remember yet an inspiration each that was a sixth worse? Okay,
So this dart shoots out and I will. I will let you decide.
Either it's going to hit you in your neck and cause a lot of
damage but not poison you, or it's going to hit you in your chest,
cause no damage, but you will get poisoned. Take the poison well,
I figured i'd be uh like squared up with it. So yeah,
right in the chest. Okay, right in the chest, all right.
So it hits you and you are poisoned, and you take your minus one
to your constitutions modifier. I'm gonna toss them in Anti Todds. Drink this.
I'm gonna get rid of all of those by the end of this session.
Got one left. I think there might be one other place for you
to use it too. We'll find out. Well, we'll find it there
is now, all right, So you opened it. Inside the chest is
a scroll. It's rolled up and a black like a jet black crossbow with
its six ammo oh cool. I'm gonna grab the scroll out and unroll it.
What is it? A magic scroll? It is? What? What?
What is? We should make an intelligence roll to see if you can
identify what it is because it's not labeled. It's very old. Nine A
nine will tell you it is a scroll of shadow step oo mm hmmmm.
With a nine, I will tell you what the scroll is, but I'm
not gonna tell you exactly what it does. A ten or more, I
would have told you everything. You have an inspiration, I do have an
inspiration, can use all those two? Ten? Okay, well done?
Oh shadow step. Shadow step will let the party step through a shadow and
into a place of power that they are familiar with. Sweet back to the
bar. So essentially, anyone that can be touching you, when you activate
your shadow step, you can step through a shadow and into a place of
power that you are Yeah connected to voice than coming. You only have two
of those basically, right, Yeah, you only have two right now,
one of the school and one here. The one only last is a month.
It's a long time for us. We can barely make it through dinner.
We did ten episodes in twenty four hours. That's right, That was
all right? And anyone want to inspect the crossbow, or anyone want to
take the crossbow, I'll fucking look at that, all right. Do you
want to try and identify and see if it's magical in nature at all?
Are you just going to take it? Well? I don't have a bonus
to anything, But what what would I roll to try to identify it?
It is your and it's an intelligence role, but it's minus two for anyone
that's not an enchanter. So two D six plus your intelligence minus two seven.
You have inspiration? I do have an inspiration. Do I want to
waste on this though? Because it's if they can. I'm gonna do it
anyway, because everybody else is doing it and it worked. It was an
eight that time. Okay, so who's better anyway? And eight? Lets
you know that this crossbow will do additional shadow damage to an enemy that is
shot with it. That is all an eight is going to tell you that.
Anybody else want to look at this? Yes, since I don't have
a billy club anymore? Oh yeah, you lost your billy club? It
does it additional? What this? No shat shadow damage? Ten with your
minds too? Yeah, it would have been twelve? Oh man? Nice?
Who spill it? What's easy? What's easy? It is called a
shadow spot on crossbow. You've seen something like this before in books, and
it will do an additional one D foreshadow damage anytime somebody is hit with a
crossbow that it like enchants the bolt itself that it shoots at nice, So
that is a good amount of damage that possibly with each shot. There's also
a really strong chance that this might be cursed. How do we figure that
out? Should I just grab it and try to shoot somebody? But you
don't know what the curse would be if there is one. Now, I
say, we hold on to it, but we're going to see an enchanter
or anyway the bolts were those normal bolts or their standard demo? Can we
go to the castle? Now? Are to? He doesn't still feel that
urge to go there? Does he? Or does he? Oh? Bill
feels that urge? Hardcore? Yeah, I'm sleeping here for what a couple
hours of sleep he actually got last night between bashing the symbols to keep you
up and not? He is he is ready to get into this castle.
He dreamed about it. He get fantastic dreams about this castle. Fancy parties,
cool hats, the outfits world. There's gonna be so many hats,
not beer hats, not beer hats, wine hats. They're gonna be classics.
I'm gonna be so fancy minstrels with all sorts of symbols and drums.
Well, I'm getting kind of excited because he's just got a really awesome treasure
chest here at the fucking statue. And you're you were talking to the dog.
What did he tell you earlier? I saw you tremember what Eddie said?
That's place? Oh yeah, yeah, I asked. I asked Eddie
about if there was anyone in the castle, and he said no, but
he said he saw lots of pictures and nice things inside. That's that is
the dream. This is why I've been saying we should go there. I
did. All right, let's go check it out. Let's we'll let Bill
loose and just follow him. Then. All right, So you you walk
through the gated community. The big iron door or iron hinges squeak as the
gates open up for you. You I skip, you skip toward the castle.
Up these giant marble stairs. Statues of ancient spellcasters, back when the
chroniclers were in power line the stairwell up toward this building. You see gargoyles
lining the rooftops of this place, but not like scary looking menacing gargoyles,
but like fancy, beautiful, beautifully designed gargoyles cherubs. Yeah. Well,
no, I mean they're still gargoyles. They've got like things, but they're
like they're happy. Yeah, they're happy gargoyles. Everything here is inviting into
this castle. You see as you walk through the entranceway a giant open ballroom
and foyer there, and it looks like it was you know, there are
so many doors here. It looks like it was probably open to the general
public when it was a city for people to come to. It's not closed
off. It is wide open. There are pillars that kind of hold the
place up, but there's not a lot of walls. As you enter into
this place. The farther you go into the castle, Phil is being drawn
more and more to a pointed location. And Bill, give me one more
wisdom save as you make your way in eight an eight, do you have
a wisdom motifor no? Okay, Ira, yeah there the last person with
inspiration. I do, but I'm in this way. I don't mind this.
You get the feeling that the only way out is in, and that's
the vibe you get. That's all I'm gonna give you with an eight.
Okay, something cryptic that you kind of that you make it with with what
you want see. See, I'm telling you this is the solution. We
have to go here this way specifically, and I'm gonna keep just going towards.
So you come up to these doors and you pass through a set of
several different halls right there there. You walk through the different halls of this
castle, the different rooms, you know, kitchens, area like, there
are stained glass windows, there are statues, just beautiful art and decor everywhere.
And you come to these two doors that's just calling you. You open
them both up and you step in. And as you step into this this
one big hall, you see on each side of the hall that you are
like elevated in the castle. Now you're a couple floors up at this point.
Just from walking around, you see that there are twelve stained glass windows,
six on each side of the hall. On the left side in this
specific order, and I will give you guys this in a second, so
don't feel like you need to jot everything down, And this specific order is
Baine, Lou, Loki, the Many Face, God, Dionysus, and
Greyhawk. And then on the right side in this specific order, directly opposite
of the first six is Hephestus, then math fab Mathanway, then Mannanon,
Maclear, kalim Voor, Kathulhu and Salune obviously just their characters put up into
stained glass for these imagery, and then on the floor in between the windows,
a ruin rests between each pair. Also in this specific order, so
the room for workmanship, access, aptitude, soul, mind, and per
So, for example, Bain was the first on the left, directly across
from him with Hephaestus on the right, and the run in between them was
workmanship. And while the fools are checking out this weird ass hallway, we
are going to cut to commercial be right back. Microphones and Monsters is a
Cthulhu D and D actual play with a balance of horror, mystery, and
comedy. Our story begins in a nineteen twenties Magitech nouir setting. We follow
the story of Alistair. That power is very much something that I need and
I don't want that to stop. Victor. I don't think I want to
help you and Julian it's burning what happened here, can't see the light of
day as they come face to face with Eldrich horrors. I don't think you
could ever stop me, and try not to fall into madness. Go to
Microphones at Monsters Dot com or listen wherever podcasts are found. A very special
thank you to our executive producers from Patreon, Nick Mead and Patrick t Arsenal.
And now let's get back to the food. Okay. So these rooms
on the floor, do they are they movable? Nope, they are like
painted into the floor. Okay. And is there anything underneath each of the
windows that would seem out of the ordinator as just a window set in a
wall. If you look under each window at look, looks like there is
a line in the stone carving in the center of each window. The stone
has like a where it's joined adjoined with like cement or concrete or whatever.
And the stone hallway that you're in, that line goes all the way across
through the room and up to the other stained glass window of the other god
on the on the other side. Okay, this first room says workmanship.
Yep, it's got bane on the left and have faced us on the right.
M So I'm going to go step across the line on the right side.
I have faced us. Okay, I mean nothing happens. Okay,
the next one will be nothing. Nothing happens. Access being like traveling and
commerce math fab so I would say the left side for that one, I
agree. Next one, lou aptitude trick or your ocean aptitude, I would
say mos pretty pretty capable kind of fella. This one's a problem though.
Soul is death or dead many face god. You think the many faced god
or do you think Kelimbar. Kalimbar is the god of the dead, which
would be Soul's right Calibar was the the many faced was the god of death.
No, I'm thinking the Kalimbar side. Kalim Bar is lawful neutral god,
dead, just the god of the dead. And then but the many
faced God was the god of death. Yeah, he was also lawful neutral.
Yeah, they had different roles though. When I'm trying to remember Kalimbor's
role, he takes care of the souls after they die, after they're dead
and death distributes the souls where they need to go, as well as the
process of death in its necessity. So like that's why he has assassins that
worship him, So that would go with Klimbar. Then I'm thinking Kalimbar stepping
across the Klimbar line. Mind, we have cthul hill Ornys. Yeah,
and then perspective, we have Greyhawk or salone mm hmm, light and law
probably Salunae the moon I mean, the old cranes would probably go with Salunae.
Their followers the moonlight pass right, Yeah, but you know what,
they have an insider perspective. Yeah, let's go with the saloon a side.
Yeah okay, but now, how do we make any kind of correlations
like in the actual room, Like it's just I'm stepping across these lines as
we're going, like bounce up from left to right depending on which one.
Yeah, yeah, okay, I'm with him. And you get all the
way to the end to double doors, I'm going to push open the door
on the right or whichever. Oh, yep, you push it open into
a chamber. Do you all go in? Or yeah, I'm going Okay,
I'm getting good vibes. Yep, do you bill, bill the vibes
that pole that you felt was pulling you to that hallway, Okay, you
know that there's some kind of connection between each two of the gods and the
room. You're not sure what it was, but you know that that was
there and that was drawing you, and now that you went through it,
you feel a lot better. But also like something is still just on the
tip of your tongue, and because of your last role, I'm not gonna
tell you what it is. So you walk into this room, and it
is the throne room. A skeleton sits in the Queen's chair. There is
no skeleton in the King's chair. There is a word etched into that chair,
over and over, scratched in it looks like with a dagger or something.
You can't read it from this distance, so you're still quite aways from
it. Between the two thrones, a small table holds two bottles. You
are not certain what's in the bottles, but they both appear to be clear
bottles with red liquids inside. Oh and on the skeleton. On that's in
the queen's chair is the queen's crown, adorned with very very large urge gems
and made of solid gold. I don't know. I'm gonna go up to
the queen's chair and see what she was etching in there. The king's chair
has the etching the games chair. Then, sorry, Bill. As you
chat travel through the chamber, you no longer feel that pole. So the
skull, the skeleton, the cups, the bottles, none of that was
pulling at you. It literally was that hallway, and you can kind of
still feel it behind you, but just not to that same degree now that
you've experienced it. As you approach the chair, you see the word relay
etched across the chair over and over and over again. Do I know the
word religion? Check? That would be a lore about lore about That's what
I was wondering. I mean metagaming. We all know. Yeah, you
got it, So I take it you're all going in to inspect things.
Now. I don't know that name at all. Okay, So when you
were studying those old ones, you were not paying attention in class. Now
I studied legends of heroes past. There were no heroes. Yeah, I
mean there's not a lot of heroes in those stories of the old ones.
It's mostly just bouts of insanity and tortured souls. So, yes, I'm
an optimist. I like a happy ending. It's not it's not my stuff.
Everyone likes a happy ending. I'm saying that's okay. So orag knows
though, And Eddie, I got a nine. You got a nine,
So you know something about it, right, something about it. You know
that relay is not a part of not only not a part of you frey
in the world, but also not a part of this universe as far as
you know. But you can't quite connect. Why a dear did you roll
to? Yeah? I got nothing, I got three okay, so yeah,
you also don't know ouag you know it's specifically connected connected to the old
ones, uh, in particular that Cuthulhu image that was just out in the
hallway. Okay, what's the word? Really? Really, now that we're
here, I should mention I forgot you were busy last night the king here
before he killed everybody, he made a blood packed with something some some kind
of war wac That's what happened here. Oh, it seems like it might
be relevant information for you. Yeah, that seems it seems he bound himself
to Cuthulhu. Relay relates to Kasulu and is mithos. Ah. Yeah,
I knew relay it was not from this world, but that makes which stands
if he bound himself to Cuthulhu, he probably ended up mad, which explains
possibly what happened to the city blood sacrifices to a god of madness. I
mean, we can see the queen here, but what happened to him said
came in and he bound himself with this. He was trying to get magic
back, and they wound up killing everybody in the killing everybody in the city.
Him and some elders elder wizards or something trying to recapture their magic.
As you motioned to the skeleton in the Queen's chair, you noticed that the
skeleton has a couple oddities. First, there is a knee it seems to
be hinged together by some kind of metal contraption. And there's a cane next
to the chair laying on the floor by the skeleton's feet. She has a
prosthetic me. I'm going to check out that knee real quick. Yeah,
it looks like the legs on the skeleton they well, everything on the skeleton
appears to be more like hollow boned, like like a bird. Was she
and Eric Cokra you would know the queen from the Legends of Old was not.
Huh is it yet? Does the skeleton look human other than being hollow?
Nope, it looks like an Araic Cocra skeleton for their inspection. You
said there was a cane. Yep, I'm going to pick that up and
investigate it see if I know anything weird about it. Wonderful, Thank you
for picking that up and investigating it. As you pick it up, the
skeleton's eyes flare to light, and the two double doors slam behind you.
The creature says, in a very deep old man, you cannot believe,
no want to have such numbers to Lambrey like tentacles thrust out from the ground,
shadow and form. The windows themselves all tint to black so that no
sunlight can come in, and the room goes completely dark. There are,
before the room completely fades out, probably at least three tentacles for each of
you that you could tell we're shooting up from the floor, and we all
roll initiative on. I'm more serious now. There are twelve gods that are
each uniquely connected to the world of Euprey. We will briefly cover each of
the twelve in this segment. Please note a few things before we begin.
First, all twelve of them these gods are considered higher gods with smaller demigods
that might report to them. Second, all twelve are accepted as legitimate,
regardless of their benevolence or malevolence. In many major cities, there are temples
of the twelve where worship of any or all of the gods is accepted and
encouraged. Finally, this list will be presented in alphabetical order. The first
god is Bain. Bain is the god of tyranny and is considered an evil
deity. He reigns in the Nine Hells, and his cruelty has been written
about in thousands of fictional tales. Boons from Bain. Boons from Bain to
his followers will generally require some sort of sacrifice and will likely enhance the damage
in chaos Servant can inflict. The second god is Cthulhu, the Old God.
Cuthulhu is considered to be the oldest of all the deities and is the
embodiment of madness. Cthulhu is said to rule in the space beyond the stars,
in another universe, yet still touching Neu Fray. In general, the
followers of the Old God are touched with varying degrees of madness. They are
prone to premonitions and unnatural abilities. The third god is Dionysus, the god
of mirth and wine. This god is one of the most common gods to
worship. This is likely because part of worshiping him requires his followers to drink
and party. Who is going to argue with that type of devotion. The
fourth god is Greyhawk. Greyhawk is identified as the primary god of Euphray.
While lore places all the other gods in other realms or universes, Greyhawk is
singled out as the only deity to rule directly over Euphray. It is said
that when the gods left Euphray that it is because Greyhawk willed it. The
Church of Greyhawk is the primary religion in all Euphray. The fifth god is
Hephaestus, the god of smithing and crafting. Many of his followers attribute their
own personal successes in craftsmanship to his blessings. He's a pretty to god,
as far as legends have it. The sixth god is Kalambor, the god
of the dead. He rules over the realm of the grave. This is
an interesting domain, as there is also Bane, the god of the nine
hells, and the many faced God, the god of death. Priests love
to lecture about the differences between three gods, attributing one to hell and suffering,
one to the dead in body and spirit, and one to the actual
act of death. For a full lecture on the differences, we recommend you
attend a sermon in any of the temples of the twelve. The seventh god
is Loki, the trickster God. He is the king of deception and prince.
Quite frankly, he's a real asshole and the other gods get really tired
of his shit. While he doesn't have many followers, the members of the
Thieves Guild really love him. The eighth god is Loch, the god of
arts, travel and commerce. Loch might not seem like a rewarding, interesting
god, but he is the second most worshiped deity in Euphrae. Due to
the hostility between national borders and the random magic events that continue to occur,
travelers have faith in law and hopes that their travels may be protected. The
ninth god menanon Maclear, the god of the ocean and sea creatures. While
he isn't a highly worshiped deity, it isn't uncommon to see a sailor or
naval officer burn a prayer to Menanon Maclear for protection while at sea. It
is also said that this deity will make deals with mortals should they ever offer
him an appropriate sacrifice. The tenth god is math fab Mathanui, the god
of magic. Many followers believe that all twelve of the gods have their own
boons that they set upon their people, but magic as a whole is believed
to be gifted by Math fob Mathanwi. There is much disagreement on Math.
Many scholars believe that Math is evil and stole magic from other gods. He
collected magic and used it to imprison his enemies in eternal torture. Others believe
that they are simply stories and Math is a benevolent god gifting magic to many,
regardless of who they worship. The eleventh god is the many Faced God,
the God of death. It was noted before, but should be stated
again. The many face God does not lord over the dead, but rather
the magical process of death itself. The Many Face God is not evil by
any means. Instead, death is a lawful and neutral process. Many assassins
subscribe to this faith. Both and final god is Salune, the goddess of
the Moon. The Cult of the Moonlit Path believes that Slunae is the true
god of Euphray, having dethroned an evil Greyhawk before returning to her own realm.
They believe that the goddess both cares for the people of Euphray while hating
the world itself. While the Church of Greyhawk prides itself on allowing all faiths
to worship how they please, the Cult of the Moonlit Path is commonly viewed
as heretical and problematic. Thank you for listening, and I hope that you
enjoyed this small piece of floor. If you would like more tidbits, or
maybe to see the maps or talk to cast and crew, be sure to
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and more can be found at www dot a fools quest dot com. Thank
you. This concludes this episode of A Fool's Quest, and join us next
time for more fun and daring adventure. Thank you for listening, and don't
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