No alone. Hello, you cannot do that show. You can't get this
episode, bann This one's got to stay up. I know. Oh gosh,
leave it to you. Welcome to Laura Kane after Dark, everybody,
thank you for tuning in. Eric just gave me like a boo boo just
to wake up a little bit. What he was doing before was way worse.
It can't be banned from anything else. Please. Oh by the way,
what love that Renegade scene? So that okay, hilarious. I know
it's so funny. So back in the day, in the nineties, there
used to be a show called Renegade. Stu Siegal Productions did Renegade Pensacola and
Silk Stockings from San Diego, and they were like nationwide shows and they were
they played on I forgot what station. They were, like the UPN or
you say network or something. Yeah. Anyway, So I was cast throughout
a couple of years in different various roles. Now this one popped up because
I recently got a residual check for a scene that I was in almost thirty
years ago. Okay, it was nineteen ninety six, okay, and I
don't even have a speaking line for three cents. No, it was twenty
nine bucks. Oh really. Yeah. So this episode where I played Jennifer,
I just walk in behind the one of the main characters and I'm like,
I'm sorry, I couldn't I couldn't stop him from coming in. But
I'm whispering I don't really have lines, and she's like, that's okay,
and then I leave, like I'm literally on for like two seconds. Yeah,
and I got twenty nine bucks thirty years later. Come on, that's
awesome. Go so I found it online somehow. Oh my god, that
was delicious. I know it. I had the really poofy bangs and everything.
Yeah, it was great. You had the total turd role. Awesome
in nineteen ninety six. Eighty six, not ninety six. This is a
big episode, you guys, because apparently we Brian and I are about to
get the gift of all gifts. Brian gets his two year anniversary with Laura
can after Dark Podcast producing the show Gift. I get my birthday gift a
little early, and now can you can you say exactly how do you think
Brian is going to react? Brian will probably faint on site, and as
he's fainting, he'll say, I love you, Eric. This is bigger
and better than what you've previously. Oh, this makes the other the other
stuff look like oop what? And then okay, how do you think I'm
going to react to the gift? You will scream, I yeah, did
you look for my birthday gift? Or did you just have and upon something?
And I was like, oh my god, I looked you did?
Yes? Oh my god, I hate this is. Okay, let's roll
some ass and let's jump. No, no, no, we're going to
stretch this out. No, no, I've waited so long. Oh my
god, this is You're gonna have to come up here when we do.
Okay, so let's play the ste all right, So we have to talk
about something from Capital Growthingwordsler. It's their annual shred event. It's back on
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et cetera. Have them shredded while chatting with the financial advisors. Now's your
chance to come and see the new office. The location is one two six
eight zero High Bluff Drive, right off of Delmar Heights Road. You make
the first ride. I think up nine thirty am till eleven thirty am on
May twenty fifth. Refreshments will be served and then you can tear the new
office. It's really cool. Yeah, we'll keep you posted, Okay,
So that's on May twenty fifth. May twenty oh, we'll talk about our
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dot com and we got to talk about our party which is coming up,
Brian's second year anniversary party where he's going to show up for an hour and
a half and then go gamble. But that's fine. At Viehas Resort and
Casino. It's May twenty fourth, which happens to be my birthday. Yes,
and so doors open at six o'clock. I'm getting you a cake.
You are, yes, I know, just the kind of you're just a
simple girl with the dream. I know exactly what kind of a cake you
want or what kind of cake? Yellow cake with any kind of frosting,
any kind of frosting, well, not too sweet and nothing with fruit,
yes, yes, and you know the frosting. I want chocolate, thank
you, not any kind I don't well, I mean any yes, any
kind of chalk. Okay, thank you. You scared me there from it
that we weren't best friends anymore. Okay, you and Marla like the exact
same cake. Really THEFF number one and you're both of your birthdays are in
May. She Gemini. I think she's a Taurus if her birthday was on
Monday, yeah it was. Okay. Anyway, our party is May twenty
fourth. It's at Vahause Casino and Resort. And what we're doing is we're
giving away some prizes. From six to seven, doors open officially at seven
before you, guys, I'll open at six and then we're going to watch
a great band, George Michael Reborn. This guy sounds looks just like George
Michael, and you will have it is the best time. It's such a
fun show and it's already sold out completely. So the only way you can
get tickets, we have twenty five pair to give to you, guys,
and this is how you get them. Okay. We're not making you jump
through tons of hoops or buy anything or anything like that. You just have
to follow us on Instagram, follow us on TikTok, you have to tag
a friend on one of our posts or we'veposted or whatever, and then just
subscribe to our YouTube channel, which is free. You just hit the button
and then if you do all those things DM Laura Kane after dark on Instagram
and the first twenty five people, boom, I'll get your ticket. Boom
boom. We're checking too, so make sure you're actually subscribing. Oh yes,
we will be double checking each one of those boxes. Okay, so
that is on May twenty fourth. Oh my god, I can't, I
can't, I can't, I can't do this. I have to okay.
I'm like, my armpits are split. Why because I'm nervous about what's in
the bag. That's the bag, you know. The best part is is
such an underwhelming bag too. It's laying a flat, like, yeah,
so he didn't have these. He was panicking before he got here, and
he's like, I didn't I didn't wrap Brian's gift or wars. Do you
have any gift bags? And I'm like, well, what size do you
need? He goes, well, probably the size of like a bread a
bread box or whatever. And I'm like, so it's an odd size but
it's literally the size of a bread box, but it's flat. Well I
wasn't gonna play my hand and be like, oh I need one. Well
okay, so Eric claims that. Okay before so I'm going first my birthday
gift. Okay, so I'm getting my birthday gift early. Do you want
to explain anything before I open it up? Like? How well? Yes,
she went to get I do not have your card and hear that I'm
giving you on your actual birthday. Okay, but happy birthday, Laura Kane.
Oh my god, Okay, it's let's take guess. Okay, it's
it's got to be something, an autograph of some sort, or tickets to
something. I don't know why. Oh, but you wouldn't be in like
it doesn't feel tickety. It could be a big envelope with or cah it's
it's it's something that has a matt it's a I'll let you guys see it
first and then I'll turn it around. No, no way, how did
you get that? I have my sources the real Barbie, Margot Robbie.
Is that her actual autograph? Yes? Oh my god? Did you get
this? Like professionally dined? Oh my god, that's so cool. She's
like what I want to be when I grow up. For that, bro,
that's so cool. Okay, I would never be able to read her
her autograph. It doesn't look like Margot Robbie at all. Just looks like
a big scribble. But I am so stoked, thank you. And that's
such a cute picture of her. That's on. I know. Oh I
have to go see now, I'm gonna have to go to Michael's to get
a neat free, a neat one, and then I'll put it up on
our wall. Yes, all right, now, Brian's turn. Now,
Brian apparently he's going to faint. Yes, now, Brian, you have
to wait a minute. Let me make sure that it's in here. Okay,
make sure it's happy anniversary, Brian for everything you do. Look,
I'm taking claim to this too. Now you have to you have to pull
both out at the same time. So there's there. You go. Okay,
oh from what is it saying the anniversary to you? Oh wow,
god? Oh okay, so this is oh wow, it's so much I
love it. So you do realize there's two signatures. Yeah, so this
is halle Berry and ye halle Berry and Keanu Reeves. And this is from
the third third John Wick movie, I think Parabellum, which is a great
one, super good movie. Now the really, the real kicker is the
the third personalized Keanu Reeves thing I have, the Happy two years. That
was pretty crazy. That is insane, can I Yeah, yeah, okay.
It's just on a on a like a little square piece of paper.
It looks like his marker was running out a little bit. Brian, Happy
anniversary two years. Keanu. Look at that. Oh my god, I
go mag shaking because he actually was like touching this and then let me see
this. Oh my gosh, what is this movie? That's John Wick?
That's Wick. I've never seen a John Wick movie. Oh my god,
watch him. I know I heard it. I'm just I just love this
man, Keanum so much, just for he just seems like he's just so
cool with his well he obviously is so clearly with his fans. Oh my
god, Ryan, that's pretty crazy that I know you're gonna have like a
whole shrine to Keanu. No, I already have two things on my walf.
Oh by the way, Oh, he's like, there's something else coming
here. There is, holy shit, but it is not what you think
it is. Is it from some Is it from Keanu Reeves? I am
not going at leberty to say it's Harrison for what's the what's the et on
this? It's like another format, Yeah exactly. No, hopefully it'll be
here by your anniversary. Oh Jesus, my heart can't handle these things.
Oh it's another like one day my birthday started and it's just never stopped.
Oh my god. That's so cool. Now now that you have somewhat of
a rapport with either Keanu or people, what is the percentage in your opinion
of him? One day showing up in my living room. What is the
percentage right now? That's a very good question, missu. Yeah, yeah,
because that was the original goal. It was a lofty goal. It's
very lofty. And in the meantime, we've been we've been getting these autographs
for Brian, Yes, personalized letters to Brian that could be for nobody else
but Brian. Yeah, literally, And but we still haven't gotten an etam
maybe when he might sit in this seat right here, do you think he's
tired of writing my name? It's with a why? Remember it's with a
why, because I mean it's not just like, oh, you know Keanu
Reeves signed picture. Every single thing he sent me says to Brian on it,
like everything says to Brian. So it's at least four times. Now
what has Eric told is people or him about I know, I think that's
this is so cool, Eric, you have like the connections you are awesome,
like Farby real life Farvey, She's like I loved her. I've loved
her ever since I saw her in Wolf of Wall Street that she was great
and I'm ever thinking she was the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. And
then she became Barbie Marco Robbie, thank you Eric. Oh my gosh,
Oh my gosh. But I saw that dog Star was coming to the belly
up at some point, yes, like I think maybe it had already had
happened, and I was like, oh I better. It was like on
a Thursday, though, So I knew that it wasn't going to like coincide
with our when we record our podcast. But we'll get him in here one
of these days. I know it. I just know it, especially now
that he knows like who you are kind of. I mean, he he
knows you know, you know, Keanu Reeves knows you happy two years that's
what he knows. That's crazy that that's actually this is cool. This is
crazy, though, I know, are you going to go back to Michael's
or where'd you go? Hobby? Love your Michaels. I don't know how
I'm gonna frame this, because didn't they want to all want to touch it.
This has already got a mat on it though, So Matt, how
do you a frame that has a like a mat something that has a mat
on it? No, I'm talking about that. This is such a tiny
ast thing. I don't even know if they could frame something this small.
Oh my god, I have to see Oh my gosh. Well, congratulations,
that was awesome. Thank you, thank you, thank you Eric,
Eric, we love you so much, and thank you for in advance for
my cake. You're on twenty fourth. You're welcome, and no, we
can't wait to see you guys at the party. It'll be great. It'll
celebrate Brian and oh I learned how to. I'm very disappointed in one thing
though, what he didn't faint. I thought Brian was going No, Brian,
no, there's no if if Keano actually keep well, I just want
to say the ante for me, fainting is increased with everything I get.
So I've he's never been. This is as amped up as I've ever seen.
The first time, I almost fainted. The first thing, I almost
just die. I can I can safely say this, Oh god, what
when you see what's coming next? What the hell? Okay, how is
this happening? Just watch? Wait? When when did we say? When
did you him? I'm waiting for it. It could come next week.
It could like you could be presenting this to him at the party. I
could Oh my god, Oh my god, oh my god. All right,
well, I don't say I know I don't even know. I don't,
are you. I am pulling out every stop for the two of you.
I think he must be in the Illuminati or something. He's I am
working every angle, all your Hollywood sources. Yes, and I usually don't
I never would do that, But don't do that for the two of you.
I am doing it. My god, that is just so cool,
and I'm fine, there's more to come. That's just totally my heart can't
handle it. Crazy, but that's how I want to die. So okay,
So all right, I have what the most popular baby names are for
this year, the top ten. You don't care. The Social Security Administration
released its annual list of the most popular names in the US for boys and
girls. Now do we want to guess any names before I give you the
names? Well, you're for twenty three Nora, yeah, uh no,
Jake no, that was like two thousand and five. Emma, Emma is
number two, Olivia number one, y she did such a beautiful name.
Let me think, Come on, there's one that there's so many of I
know so many of these. Ryan. Ryan is not on the boy or
girl list. I'll just give you. I'll just give him to you.
Okay, here are the girls, Luna, Evelyn, Evelyn, Evelyn,
Ava, Isabella, Mia, Sophia. That's one of the one. I
know a lot of Sophia's Amelia, Charlotte. That's a pretty pretty name.
Emma, and then Olivia. And then for boys and he guesses on the
boys. Jake no, no, Jake no. William is number ten old
school, then Lucas Henry. I love it. I've already decided it's gonna
be my first son's name. Oh, Charlie was almost Henry more for Henry
Jones. But you know Henry Jones. Who's Henry Jones? If you think
about it will come to you. Maybe not. You should know, though
I probably should. Am I embarrassed right now? Henry Jones Junior? I
say, do you know who Jones Junior is? Ookay, we don't know,
well who is he? That's Indiana Jones's real name? Oh? Sorry,
oh, okay, okay? Uh Theodore Theodore Theo. Oh that's cute.
Matteo No, I hate the name. Oh, I love that.
I know a couple Mateo's and the great people by hate Nameteo call Maddie right
or Teo, Elijah, Oliver, Noah and Liam is the number one name.
Liam. Okay. So, now I have a game, you guys.
It's called the five second uh rule? Five second yeah, five second
rules, and the the the object of the game, I can't even think
straight. The object of the game is to name three things that are on
this card within five seconds. Here's the little timer, your whole one.
You need help, Yes, here's the timer goes like this, So you
have exactly that much time. I got it, I think. So that's
five seconds. That's five seconds. Okay, So I will just read you
what you're supposed to. Let me read the card to you. No,
I'm gonna read the card to you and then to you, and then you
read one to me, and then whoever gets it gets the card. Who
has the most cards at the end wins. Take turns individually, right,
Yes, okay? Ready, Eric, Yes, name three nicknames for sexual
intercourse, fucking doing it bareback? Okay, all right, but bear just
refers to the nature of the protection. Oh, I'll give it to him.
I'll give it to him. I'll give it to me. All right
now, Brian, name three places you'd like to hide a camera, plant,
cabinet, and TV. Okay, all right, okay, Laura,
things that get stuck under your nails, food, makeup, and hair?
Okay, hair, I don't know, you get hair stuck under your nails?
Well? Dog air? Maybe? Yeah? Sometimes? I know that's
totally gross. Okay, ready, yes, Eric, name three male body
parts dick, nipples, and balls. Okay, we're good at this game,
all right, Yeah, Brian, name three celebrities involved in a sex
scandal. Uh Marilyn Monroe. I don't know. Actually, okay, so
when you're not okay, so now you try it. Wait wait, you
can't say Mayln Monroe. So you said that, Yes, yes, you
can't say that three celebrities in a sex scandal. Uh. Kim Kardashian Uh,
Ellen degenerous? What okay? The lady who doesn't like penises? Okay,
oh my god, Okay wait a minute, Paris Hilton. Nope,
that's hard. It's hard. It's hard, see because I can't you can't
repeat what anybody else said? What's a sex scandal? Too? Like it?
Like? Is it just cheating? Pamela Pamela Anderson and Tommy Abou Russell
Crow che on his wife? Is that sex scandal? Sure? With Meg
Ryan? Yes, that was a sex scandal. Yes, totally okay,
Now, Eric, yes, named three songs about sex? Uh doing it
a big ship? I don't know, okay, Brian. Three songs about
sex, Go Cake by the Ocean, Pour some sugar on me, and
come on Eileen, that's about sex. I'm pretty sure. All right.
I hate that song. I didn't know that. Oh my god, I
hate that song more than you in that dress. My thoughts, I can
confess that song. Yeah, oh ver John dirty. At least it's a
very least a very I've never really listened to the lyrics except for come on,
Eileen. I love that song. Okay, come on come is in
the title true? So now it's my turn, Yes, okay. Jerks
named three jerks Antonio, Brian sometimes and for the word cock, thank you,
okay, Eric, three jerks go trump um ship. That's the only
jerk I can think. Ryan, Three jerks go Jimmy Kimmel, Charlie Sheen
and uh uh no, no, I know, I know. Sometimes it
is all right. Now it's Eric Stern. Name three ways you deal with
a hemorrhoid, cream, medicine and poking it. Okay, you get it?
Okay, Brian, name three places you'd hate to get a pimple.
But genitals and back easy anywhere. I guess. No one wants the camera
so we can see. There's no camera right now, there's no I know.
Can you turn it around? All right? Oh my god? Okay,
so here ready? Yeah, okay, go drugs? Three drugs ecstasy,
heroin, cocaine. Okay, yes, I know, thank you?
All right now it's Eric Stern named three times faster is better? No,
I'm going to name okay, name three things that burn, go fire,
a stove and oban, I mean whatever. Brian named three people with questionable
morals, uh, Trump, Charlie Sheen, and Jimmy Kim. Okay,
whatever, I'll give it to you, all right. But he seems like
a jerk. I don't. I don't think. Oh this is a great
one for Laura. Oh, here we go, ready. And activities that
make you hungry, oh, sex, working out and gardening. You wouldn't
know about any of those things, I know, not lately. Not.
Okay, Eric, name three words you say when you're angry, fuck,
shit and crap. Okay, Brian, name three lies you tell on a
job interview. Yes or no? I've never been to jail. Yes,
I have that work experience, and I don't have any weaknesses. You didn't
get it? What, yes, I did? No, the ball was
already there was still one. There was still one left. See I'm so
easy. Such a pushover. Okay, go one more round, luracane.
Okay, what reasons you get? Dirty gardening, playing in mud, and
sexual intercourse. That's the same thing you said last time you did the same
thing, didn't you. Okay? Eric, name three men who should consider
hair removal, Tom Selleck, Trump and Charlie Sheen. Ooh, Trump with
no hair, that would be you know what, I actually like him a
little bit better. A bald Donald Trump. You would look a lot more
imposing, like you look like good doctor No from the original James Bond.
He looked like this. Yeah, this structor evil? All right? Brian
named three people who need to gain weight. I don't know any innerxic people.
Okay, I'll give you a different one. Name three uses for coconut
oil lubricant good for your hair, and moisturizer lubricip. You know how I
know that? Like actually, because I used to like there was this one
time I saw like this, like this couple they walked into the target I
was like, in the same mile. I think it was in like the
super aisle, and they bought two things of coconut oil and they walked out.
That was all they got. And I was like why and so like
Google, I was like, well, else can you do with cocon oil?
And like the one of the top number results is lubricint. I was
like, it wasn't for just moisturizing. No, I mean, I guess
it is. It's like two and one's for moisturizing. You're wiener, all
right? Eric, Yes, named three people who would make better zombies than
humans. Uh, Trump, Charlie Sheen and Tom Selling recycling pot of answers.
Brian named three ways the world could end Trump nuclear annihilation, pandemic and
volcanoes. Perfect Okay, I don't know. I didn't see that one.
Uh shoot, juicy things okay, vaginas, oranges and pineapples one of those
things in your experiences. Okay, Eric, that's so gross. Name three.
I don't think you well, I don't think you know that. Named
three. Oh here, this is a good one. Named three uses for
your tongue, Oh, kissing, kunnelingus and analongus analongus. I don't think
that's a word. Yes, it is the word. What's the word rimming?
Oh yeah, in a lungus. Though, in a lungus, I
think they called eating ass or licking ass. Never have never will never have
never will a tasty treat there? No, no, no, Lauracane has
never done that. Chocolate factory is closed, yes, and I think that
goes in there. Everything has come out, okay, sometimes occasionally, like
once every month. Okay, name three items in a mob daughter's dowry.
What the hell does that mean? Okay? Uh, gaudy rings, drugs
and a pistol? Okay, Eric, wait, no, it's waits my
turn. Yes, okay, go tasty things okay, penis, chocolate,
cake and oranges. I don't think the first one counts. Why you never
taste right? But tasty? Ask Eric? Be tasting object like actually like,
oh this is a pleasant like I wish my drink was this flavor.
I it depends on the person, but I you know, I'm giving myself
that card. I get that card there. Okay, one more round and
then and then we'll stop. This is fun. We're getting we're getting good
at this now. Eric named three things you nibble nibble, neck cock and
ass neck, went from next straight to cock, and from cock to ask
how many cocks you nibble? No? No, okay, so it's like
he's like you want had like, no, I want you to nibble.
Brian named three reasons to feel shame nibbling on cock, getting a bad grade,
and committing a crime. Nailed it. Pick a good one for me
to end on. Oh well, this is a good one for you.
Ways to end a bad date. Leave the restaurant, pretend that you're going
to the bathroom, and pretend you get a phone call emergency. Oh that's
very good. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Do we want
to end one more round? Let's go one. I'm around okay, half
an hour right now? All right, we could go as we want.
Eric, Yeah, name three ways you get a bruise, falling, punching,
hitting, Okay, I mean those are all correct? Yeah okay,
Brian? Yeah. Three free things water, air, sun, well not
water, so outside water is free depending on where you get from not from
the sink. No, no, that's also not free. Okay, mix
it up. See if there's any good ones. Oh okay, okay,
let's see this is going to be oh god, okay, ready my god,
Oh my god, Laura, I'm gonna have to maybe do a couple
of these for you. Okay, Okay, nicknames for evacuating your bowels,
okay, dropping your kids off at the pool, put shitting, and crapping.
I'm gonna say you should have just said crapping and dumping. That's great,
but that was clever the first one, I guess. Okay, Eric,
mm hmmm, all right, name three uh uses for pantyhose, mask
for your legs, and for your hands. For your hands, I don't
think you could. We know if you describe what you can do with them
with your Okay, I was nice to you. I gave you one for
what I don't remember. No, I don't think you earned it. I
did. I didn't have a contentious answer. Okay, we have not withheld
one from anybody. Okay, here's the one, Brian, name three things
that could get stuck up your nose. A bean, a pencil, and
a paper clip. Okay, true, all those things are a dick.
Okay, here, okay, not one of those. I don't want that.
I don't want that top one because I don't know. I know this
is like the nod, isn't an uncensored version. There's a family version two
of this game. It's fun. Here's another death here, oh my god.
And there are some on the other side too. Oh yeah, they
were all over the place. Damn. Okay, okay, ready, yes,
reasons you wish you were a dog. I can sleep all day,
I can eat whatever I want, and I can ship in the yard.
You can do that, now, that's true. What I would have totally
said I could lick my own balls. Well, why would I have something
good? I don't want? Yeah? Use all right, Eric, Yes,
something wrong with your dog? He's been looking his balls the past three
hours. Three nicknames for urination, pissing, pee and uh uh urinating?
I don't know. Three nicknames for urination, whizzing, weeing, and tinkling.
Good. Have you ever heard of the term making water? No?
I got to make some water. That's that's old school. That doesn't make
sense. What it's an actual thing? It doesn't make sense. That came
to my head anyway. Okay, now it's my turn or whatever. Lour
Kane, Yes, sluts okay, Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, and Nicki
minaj Oh what I don't know. I'm sorry. Nikki. Well, yeah,
no, she talks about being a slut and her songs, right,
yeah, I think that was more car booty. Ho isn't that her song?
What? What about? What else pussy I should have? I don't
think. Well, I'm you know what, I'm keeping the card. Eric
name three places you find a prostitute, Ali Club and Vegas. There's the
one that lives here. Okay, Brian, Yeah. Three reasons to be
embarrassed. You ship yourself, you pissed yourself, or you came accidentally in
your pants. I got and I was like, I was like, all
right, I'm gonna go for them. Crazy one, my god, Okay,
that would be embarrassing. It would be totally embarrassing. Yeah, uh
okay, yes, let me see here. Colors your poop could be brown,
green, yellow, Look, I even have time to spare. God,
thank you give me another one that was boring yellow poop. I'm a
little concerned for you. I never will that's it could be asking for a
friend, okay, okay, ready, yeah, another one places you don't
want to find blood Okay, under my nose, coming out of my butt,
or coming out of my knee. Okay, then now it's Brian's turn
to do that same one. Okay, wait, where is the question?
Places you don't want to find blood? My bed, my bathroom, my
pants. You're good at keep it simple, stupid. Okay, Eric,
Yes, name three things you shout out during sex. I'm coming, oh
baby, Yeah, that's it. You get done a lot more than three
on that one. Okay, but Zinga, this is a good one.
Okay. Name three things you shouldn't buy on discount toilet paper, pregnancy tests,
and condoms. Good job, you guys are infesting my mind with just
sex stuff, and that's something I can think about. I had condom instantly,
but I was like, I don't want to say condom. That's gross.
Like we've done so many and I was like, all right, that's
all I got. Hey, we're on, you know what, we're on
a vibe right now, we're ready, yes, already, then we'll stop.
Okay, get ready to turn it? Okay. Things you bang drum
a guy a girl? I don't think you could. You can bang a
guy. You can bang a girl, of course. I alway here when
I say like, oh I'm a bang, it's always on, like I'm
not bang her, I'm going to bang him. Maybe you can say that.
I guess I'm just Eric named three things on a hooker's to do list.
Get cash, get blown, get her vagina eaten because I say get
tested. All right, okay, Brian pay Rent name uh three Oh this
is good, this is good. Name three places you don't want to have
diarrhea? Uh in my car, in a dressing room at the grocery store.
I thought have a grocery store too good, good, good good.
I had dressing room that came into my head for some reason. Okay,
yes, okay, let me see here. Did we do you? I
think we lost the order. I know we did. We did do you?
You're next? Okay, No, he's looking for one for me.
Okay, Okay, we are going to do this one. Okay. Places
you wish you could wear pajamas? Uh, the grocery store, work and
dinner out. I didn't see it, so you get it. I know,
yeah, I get it. You want to keep going? Yes,
okay, Eric, Eric, name three things that are no good dry dick,
fingers and a tongue. I thought you were going to say, like
badge or something. Okay, that was that was so far off my radar.
Okay, Brian, name three phallic shaped things A penis sometimes sticks,
and all right, I'll go to genus is shaped just like a paullus.
I realized that one day, even get that. I shouldn't the rules against
that? Okay, go Laura ca Yes, reasons you puke? Oh my
god, you're thinking about before you You drank too much, you ate too
much, you have the flu. Okay, Okay, there we go,
Thank you, welcome. Eric named three things you pay for by the hour,
hookers, parking, and movies. That's what you pay for movies by
the hour. You do? Oh okay, I can't relate, so either.
Just Brian, name three sexual positions. Go really really, I'm going
to pleat the fifth on that. All right again? Matrimony, matrimonial,
the chicken and donkey, the flying squirrel in the koala. You don't get
that one. I don't know why you're not. Wait, don't I have
to do it? I bet no, I bet if you look at the
commas suture, I bet those were all in there. Okay. They have
like the craziest names, like the h the monkey squatting football magicians. All
right, Eric, you give it a shot. Wait, what was the
question again. Uh places, Wait it is the position sexual positions named three
sexual positions go reverse, cow girl, Doggie style and missionary. Good.
Okay, wait, where's the card? Were here? You get the card?
The crotch card? Okay, okay, or unless you have you should
have answered that. I don't even know. I don't know what's happening right
now. Are people you never want to see naked? Trump? But you
know what though I would want to is do you naked? I just that
would make me tormy. Daniel's got a lot of money to see him naked.
I want to see I pretty much would want to see anybody naked?
Why not? Why not? You know what, I'm going to give it
to you. She got one that was good enough for me. God,
all right, it's totally fell apart. All right? Are we done?
Oh? Wait? Brian? Ok things you don't want to hear your doctor
say you have cancer, you have an infection disease. We're naming a new
disease after you. You're pregnant. I would never want to hear that.
Well, you'll never hear that. Lets count up your cards and then I'll
count up Brian's cards. I think Brian is the clear winner here, but
I don't think we get we held any cards back from anybody. I know.
I don't think so. The other one call it three way time,
all right, we'll call it a three way anyway. You guys just follow
our instructions on Laura Cane after Dark. They're right there. How you can
get tickets to suit our big party, which is on May twenty fourth at
Viejas Casino and Resorts. It's on May twenty fourth, Friday. We're going
to be seeing the band George Michael Reborn, and before that we'll be giving
away some prizes and we're just going to celebrate Brian's two years with the show.
And it just happens to fall on my actual birthday. It's going to
be a blast. Seventh seen so fun Ken, I didn't count. You
have seven Brian clear I think Brian clearly one one, two, three,
four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven,
twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen,
nineteenth. Yeah, Brian wins. Brian wins gradually, thank you. I'll
be here until next week. How to get the tickets? Just got a
Laura Kane after dark dot com. You'll see how and then we will email
you a pair of tickets if you win. All right, thank you so
much for watching, and thank you so much for listening. We love you,
guys, We love you. We'll wait to party with you. Love
your podcast, Love your podcast. I love you, my sweet babies,
I love you, Love you too. Thank you for my president. Oh
my god. Fine, you can turn this off. Mammy, mam ma,