WEBVTT 1 00:00:04.440 --> 00:00:16.559 Ninth Story Studios giving Story a Voice. Welcome to the list, get ready 2 00:00:16.600 --> 00:00:40.840 to take the ride. Hello, and welcome to season five, episode number 3 00:00:40.840 --> 00:00:44.960 two of Victoria's Lift. I'm Daniel Foytech, and I thank you for listening. 4 00:00:45.799 --> 00:00:49.759 Today's episode was written for us by a returning author, the very talented 5 00:00:49.920 --> 00:00:54.240 Lee Andrew Foreman. He has written audio fiction for us The Wicked Library, 6 00:00:54.560 --> 00:00:59.479 and has multiple books and collections available on Amazon, including The Very Creepy Berry 7 00:00:59.520 --> 00:01:03.880 Box. He is also one of the masters behind Siren's Call Publishing. You 8 00:01:03.880 --> 00:01:07.680 can find out more about Lee at Lee Andrew Foreman dot com. Before we 9 00:01:07.719 --> 00:01:11.439 begin, a sincere thank you to those of you supporting the show on Patreon. 10 00:01:11.879 --> 00:01:15.519 You truly make this show possible. It's because of your support that I 11 00:01:15.560 --> 00:01:19.159 can continue to pay the very talented authors, artist, voice actors, and 12 00:01:19.359 --> 00:01:23.680 composers. Simply, it's your support that allows us to continue to make sure 13 00:01:23.760 --> 00:01:29.079 those who contribute to the show do not work for free. A special shout 14 00:01:29.079 --> 00:01:33.439 out to our friend Jeremy. Saul's characters based on him and his special friend 15 00:01:33.439 --> 00:01:38.719 Apolo are immortalized in my three part tale Von Hamlin. So, Jeremy, 16 00:01:38.079 --> 00:01:42.840 I know it's hard to lose a dear companion. Victoria says she's taking very 17 00:01:42.840 --> 00:01:46.599 special care of Apollo and giving him lots of extra rubs and cuddles, and 18 00:01:46.799 --> 00:01:49.680 he is a very good boy. If you're not yet supporting the show, 19 00:01:49.840 --> 00:01:53.560 you can do that at patreon dot com forward slash Wicked Library. For as 20 00:01:53.560 --> 00:01:56.879 little as two dollars a month, you can help make the show you love 21 00:01:56.920 --> 00:02:00.719 possible and get fun rewards. A lot of hard work and money goes into 22 00:02:00.760 --> 00:02:04.120 making Victoria's Lift. I really do rely on your support to help me pay 23 00:02:04.159 --> 00:02:07.599 the contributors. In addition to knowing that you're a part of making this show 24 00:02:07.640 --> 00:02:12.080 possible, you can get fund rewards like ad free episodes and more. You 25 00:02:12.080 --> 00:02:16.280 can support us at patreon dot com forward slash Victoria's Lift. Today's story is 26 00:02:16.280 --> 00:02:22.719 performed by the incomparable Graham Rowet and the always spectacular Amber Collins as our girl 27 00:02:22.800 --> 00:02:27.120 Victoria. The episode features a custom scored by Nico Vites of We Talk of 28 00:02:27.199 --> 00:02:31.120 Dreams. This story is beautifully dark and packs a punch. Have a seat 29 00:02:31.120 --> 00:02:36.639 and relax as we present a tale about casting aside, self loathing, seeing 30 00:02:36.680 --> 00:02:43.800 your true nature, and overcoming self imposed exile in Carapis by Lee Andrew Foreman. 31 00:03:30.479 --> 00:03:38.120 I've lived here longer than I can remember. These walls, whole decades 32 00:03:38.199 --> 00:03:43.639 of dust and smoke and everything else, layers of my life waiting to be 33 00:03:43.879 --> 00:03:52.479 painted over, fresh, new clean. The cracks speak of broken promises and 34 00:03:52.919 --> 00:04:00.639 fractured hearts, the stained wallpaper of faded dreams. I've only wonders are left 35 00:04:00.680 --> 00:04:04.120 among all in me which has died, and that is to stay here in 36 00:04:04.240 --> 00:04:11.439 this crumbling apartment. Some have tried to get me to leave, but my 37 00:04:11.560 --> 00:04:15.639 world is here. I have no reason to go. If I want to 38 00:04:15.680 --> 00:04:18.519 see what's out there, all I have to do is look out the sixth 39 00:04:18.519 --> 00:04:25.480 floor window. I loathe this place as much as myself, but I don't 40 00:04:25.519 --> 00:04:31.800 d'er expose the innocent to my repugnant existence. I must remain here so the 41 00:04:31.839 --> 00:04:40.519 eyes of the world don't suffer. I'm sustained by drippings from a leaky faucet 42 00:04:40.920 --> 00:04:46.600 and the small meals I can scavenge. My tongue laps at each drip, 43 00:04:46.360 --> 00:04:53.160 my stomach groans at what little it receives. It's enough to get by, 44 00:04:53.279 --> 00:04:59.720 to survive, to remain within my prison, my cage, my haven. 45 00:05:00.720 --> 00:05:08.199 Footsteps thunder outside the door. Fear that I'll have to vacate this place always 46 00:05:08.360 --> 00:05:14.560 lurks within my shadow, But the loneliness filling the air as equally suffocating. 47 00:05:15.839 --> 00:05:21.399 Where is the middle ground? Where is the land of both solitude and tranquility? 48 00:05:23.600 --> 00:05:29.879 Does such a place exist? Or is all hell above and below? 49 00:05:31.240 --> 00:05:38.959 Maybe I've died and this is hell. But I wouldn't be so lucky for 50 00:05:39.079 --> 00:05:42.839 this to be. My punishment would also reveal itself to be a reward. 51 00:05:43.600 --> 00:05:48.120 What devil would extend such a gift? What pleasure would exist in the realm 52 00:05:48.160 --> 00:05:56.279 of damnation? As those trotting shoes come closer, I run for my sanctum 53 00:05:56.759 --> 00:06:01.199 dug tooth and claw into the wall. Backing my closet. I curl up 54 00:06:01.240 --> 00:06:06.720 in my little hole, pulling covers over my body to hide from anything and 55 00:06:06.920 --> 00:06:15.759 everything. But the footsteps pass, and, somewhat relaxed, I allow dreamless 56 00:06:15.759 --> 00:06:24.959 sleep to take me. When I wake, the door to the closet has 57 00:06:25.000 --> 00:06:29.480 shut, and when I try to get up, my foot pushes through the 58 00:06:29.600 --> 00:06:34.319 thin layer left in the back wall. On the other side, a place 59 00:06:34.360 --> 00:06:42.319 I've never seen waits. I stare through the hole with curious eyes. The 60 00:06:42.439 --> 00:06:48.000 dim green light seems calming and enticing, Yet I've not left this place in 61 00:06:48.160 --> 00:06:54.360 so long. What waits out there is not what I want to meet. 62 00:06:55.439 --> 00:07:00.279 My heart begs me to stay, to remain in place, but I'm otherwise 63 00:07:00.480 --> 00:07:05.759 trapped in my little heaven, and as much as I'd like to, I 64 00:07:05.879 --> 00:07:15.439 can't remain forever. I peel away enough thin wall to exit into this unknown. 65 00:07:15.560 --> 00:07:21.839 Black doors adorn the sides of a long hallway, each leading to rooms 66 00:07:21.920 --> 00:07:29.240 I've never seen, places of dread to be avoided. My legs tremble as 67 00:07:29.279 --> 00:07:34.720 I scurry across the carpet. My heart thumps. I smell the pungent odor 68 00:07:34.800 --> 00:07:41.759 of my own fear. It both drives me and holds me back, moves 69 00:07:41.839 --> 00:07:47.040 me forward while tugging my thoughts to what's behind. That shadowed hand we all 70 00:07:47.079 --> 00:07:55.319 possess always wants to remain in the past. It pulls wraps itself around our 71 00:07:55.360 --> 00:08:03.319 throats and chokes us of whatever happiness might wait in our future paths. Green 72 00:08:03.800 --> 00:08:11.360 fluorescent bulbs flicker above, darkness blinks its eyes. The rapid pounding in my 73 00:08:11.480 --> 00:08:16.920 chest stops from the affraction of time, then resumes its violent action. I 74 00:08:18.120 --> 00:08:22.759 keep forward until I reach the end, holes extending out at both sides. 75 00:08:24.759 --> 00:08:31.800 I look each way to my left, another corridor of unknown length, its 76 00:08:31.959 --> 00:08:37.879 end and unlit mystery. To my right, more of the same, lime 77 00:08:37.080 --> 00:08:46.559 walls and black doors. A repeating thumb echoes from the darkness. Heavy breaths 78 00:08:46.879 --> 00:08:54.720 gust from the unseen. They carry the stench of a wanting stomach. A 79 00:08:54.840 --> 00:09:01.600 growl pounds my ears. I don't know what's coming. Instinct begs me to 80 00:09:01.679 --> 00:09:07.879 flee. I don't argue. As I sprint away, the steps behind me 81 00:09:07.039 --> 00:09:13.879 quickened. A chase has begun. Howls of a predatory tone sound from my 82 00:09:15.080 --> 00:09:20.000 hunter. Its jaw slaps opened and shut. I dare not look back to 83 00:09:20.039 --> 00:09:26.840 see how close those teeth are. But hot breath puffs against my back. 84 00:09:26.600 --> 00:09:31.360 The scent of its hunger thickens the very air in which I run. One 85 00:09:31.519 --> 00:09:37.759 lined, Run as fast as you can, despite not knowing where the voice 86 00:09:37.799 --> 00:09:41.879 came from. I do exactly that. But my pursuer is closing in, 87 00:09:43.360 --> 00:09:48.200 and my strength is failing. The hot blood burning through my veins begins to 88 00:09:48.279 --> 00:09:56.159 slow. Every breath is a struggle for survival all its own. My subconscious 89 00:09:56.159 --> 00:10:03.279 begins to accept mortality, spilling into my thought says, all too calm realizations 90 00:10:03.279 --> 00:10:09.399 that the end is inevitable. Death has arrived and does not wait for anyone, 91 00:10:11.360 --> 00:10:16.679 especially not for a meager creature such as myself. The door gave for 92 00:10:16.799 --> 00:10:20.320 the door, a portion of wall just large enough for me to fit through. 93 00:10:20.440 --> 00:10:26.679 Opens. I make for it and skid through on scrambling legs. As 94 00:10:26.679 --> 00:10:31.600 it closes behind me, too small for the beast to follow, I get 95 00:10:31.600 --> 00:10:39.039 a glimpse at it pointed teeth line, Its more long, scraggly fur covers 96 00:10:39.120 --> 00:10:46.519 its entirety. On four legs, it walks tears, pointed tail, whipping 97 00:10:46.600 --> 00:10:52.279 back and forth in anger of its prey escaping. As I back up, 98 00:10:54.039 --> 00:11:01.159 a wall immediately stops me. Misty light creeps in through lay where the plaster 99 00:11:01.320 --> 00:11:07.120 has cracked. This door has led me inside the wall. I'm deeper in 100 00:11:07.200 --> 00:11:15.679 than I've ever been before, inside a hidden place, a special place that 101 00:11:15.799 --> 00:11:22.639 provides a neurotic comfort to a terror stricken mind. It must be safe here 102 00:11:22.519 --> 00:11:28.960 in this world, within a world. I make my way through cobwebs and 103 00:11:30.159 --> 00:11:37.639 dust, aimlessly searching the hidden labyrinth. I lose myself in its many paths, 104 00:11:37.639 --> 00:11:41.440 just as I'd lost myself in my own mind. Who I was doesn't 105 00:11:41.519 --> 00:11:48.759 matter, only what I've become, A filthy creature only deserving of a festering 106 00:11:48.919 --> 00:11:56.080 habitat and the scraps of nature on which to sustain a lowly existence. A 107 00:11:56.200 --> 00:12:03.000 life better left secret unknown, kept away from those who possess the will for 108 00:12:03.159 --> 00:12:11.080 joy, who seek out the pleasures and satisfactions of life. The monotony of 109 00:12:11.120 --> 00:12:16.919 this inner maze, both physical and mental, is as a mirror, one 110 00:12:16.960 --> 00:12:24.799 in which I see the worst reflection of myself. I gaze in apathy. 111 00:12:26.159 --> 00:12:31.039 There is no shock, no remorse. I witness only what I deserve. 112 00:12:33.080 --> 00:12:39.240 I've been driven deep into my sanctum, deeper still into my mind. My 113 00:12:39.279 --> 00:12:46.600 beady eyes can see from within and without. But it doesn't matter, because 114 00:12:46.639 --> 00:12:54.360 ever further I crawl, ever lower do I bring my value and expectations. 115 00:12:54.159 --> 00:13:03.960 The whole I've dug is fathoms deep in misery. Just when my indifferent epiphany 116 00:13:03.200 --> 00:13:11.480 reaches its peak, this haven proves unsafe. Its secret has been discovered. 117 00:13:11.279 --> 00:13:18.279 A vicious growl rattles this slender escape route. The beast has found its way 118 00:13:18.320 --> 00:13:24.440 in four legs, thumping toward me. Of course, I run, what 119 00:13:24.600 --> 00:13:30.120 else would one do? No matter how desolate and despaired and accepting of an 120 00:13:30.120 --> 00:13:37.000 emotionally numb fate, the bodies fight for survival always kicks in. There's no 121 00:13:37.240 --> 00:13:45.240 escaping the need to escape. Nature won't allow it. Air rushes against my 122 00:13:45.320 --> 00:13:50.320 back as a claw nearly tears flesh. My life is balancing on a thin 123 00:13:50.480 --> 00:13:56.639 line death laughing on the other side. It's pointing a finger directly at me. 124 00:13:58.759 --> 00:14:03.679 I've been chosen to this world in which I don't belong. But a 125 00:14:03.759 --> 00:14:13.399 thought comes I'd never expect. It, screams with feverish insistence. I don't 126 00:14:13.399 --> 00:14:20.399 want to die. With that thought, something in me changes, not conjured 127 00:14:20.440 --> 00:14:26.000 by adrenaline and fear, but by a fresh light in my soul, a 128 00:14:26.200 --> 00:14:33.440 new flame to bring life to my dead insides. In a burst of fury, 129 00:14:33.080 --> 00:14:41.480 this revelation nignites my blood boils. I run faster, harder, with 130 00:14:41.639 --> 00:14:48.559 determination. I want to live. That's it limit, Now you've got it. 131 00:14:48.399 --> 00:14:56.200 That kind voice lends hope to my position in this deadly chase. Sometimes 132 00:14:56.240 --> 00:15:01.799 the prey gets away, the hunter doesn't always catch its meal. I dart 133 00:15:01.919 --> 00:15:07.879 forward with all the strength I have around a bend and to a weak spot 134 00:15:07.919 --> 00:15:11.879 on the wall. I claw at the lathe. A cloud of dust obscures 135 00:15:11.919 --> 00:15:18.559 my vision. But I pull at this barrier by feeling alone. I must 136 00:15:18.600 --> 00:15:22.679 get away. I must escape the beast that hungers for my life. It 137 00:15:22.879 --> 00:15:30.720 steps slow as it nears, each footfall, a hearted stump of impending doom. 138 00:15:30.879 --> 00:15:35.200 My end is beating its drum, a song of death played for I 139 00:15:35.720 --> 00:15:43.039 and I alone. It is my melody, my unloving goodbye. Old plaster 140 00:15:43.200 --> 00:15:48.360 finally crumbles and gives way as I break through and spill back into the hall 141 00:15:48.440 --> 00:15:54.559 of doors. But in this hall there is an end. Darkness has not 142 00:15:54.720 --> 00:16:02.559 claimed it. Calm emerald light shines from the bulbs above, bathed in an 143 00:16:02.600 --> 00:16:10.960 illumination of solace. A girl stands in front of ornate elevator doors. Hello, 144 00:16:11.080 --> 00:16:15.840 linnit, it's nice to finally meet you. It's the voice, the 145 00:16:15.879 --> 00:16:21.320 one which led me from the depths of an inner hell and out into the 146 00:16:21.320 --> 00:16:26.879 world of the living, the place where all hope is not extinct, where 147 00:16:26.879 --> 00:16:33.919 it grows and flourishes, fills the air with fresh vibrancy. The mystery how 148 00:16:33.960 --> 00:16:37.960 this girl knows me? I hadn't questioned it. In the midst of fear, 149 00:16:38.440 --> 00:16:45.159 I only scrambled toward any and all hope, into any light that may 150 00:16:45.240 --> 00:16:51.799 shine. And her voice was that brilliant spectrum. So I followed without question 151 00:16:52.000 --> 00:16:59.720 or doubt. But now wonder piques my scrabbled mind. It is lost, 152 00:16:59.759 --> 00:17:04.160 as quickly is found. My pursuer breaks through the hole I made for myself 153 00:17:04.400 --> 00:17:10.720 and into the hole behind me. It shakes off the plaster dust coating its 154 00:17:10.759 --> 00:17:17.079 body. The creature licks its lips as it paces back and forth, anxious 155 00:17:17.359 --> 00:17:22.720 and waiting to devour my flesh. Despite my frenzied escape, Doom has not 156 00:17:22.960 --> 00:17:30.960 surrendered its pursuit. It has tracked me here, cruel and unrelenting. I 157 00:17:30.000 --> 00:17:37.039 am its meager plaything. But before death can lay its hand upon me, 158 00:17:37.759 --> 00:17:42.480 before its cold grasp can take the breath from my lungs and the heat from 159 00:17:42.480 --> 00:17:49.839 my body, the girl speaks. She she leave for Lenin alone. She 160 00:17:49.960 --> 00:17:56.160 waves her hand at the pacing beast. It squints its eyes and the owls 161 00:17:56.240 --> 00:18:03.599 incomplaint, before turning and disappearing down the hall. With a simple, defiant 162 00:18:03.880 --> 00:18:10.599 stance, an effortless confrontation, this girl has kept the reaper at bay. 163 00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:15.759 What I mused impossible has occurred before me. I thought such strength was reserved 164 00:18:15.920 --> 00:18:22.000 for the vicious and empowered, the speakers of great stature and doors of amazing 165 00:18:22.160 --> 00:18:30.079 things, never for the meek or average among us. But all you need 166 00:18:30.519 --> 00:18:37.400 is a voice. Words possess great power. I'm sorry she chased you where 167 00:18:37.480 --> 00:18:41.559 she did. She only sees people as they see themselves. The girl looks 168 00:18:41.640 --> 00:18:48.799 down at my pathetic form, the inferior skin I wear, the shield of 169 00:18:48.920 --> 00:18:56.359 scars, burns and bruises, my mental image that shrouds me as the worst 170 00:18:56.680 --> 00:19:03.640 version of myself. That what the hunter saw. I hadn't looked in so 171 00:19:03.839 --> 00:19:10.559 long. I'd forgotten from where I came, misremembered who and what I am. 172 00:19:11.119 --> 00:19:17.559 This blanket of healed stitching smothers the light inside, covers all that is 173 00:19:17.680 --> 00:19:23.359 good within me. For too long I have worn it, fused with my 174 00:19:23.480 --> 00:19:30.519 being, It grew wormed its way inside. It reached for the core of 175 00:19:30.559 --> 00:19:34.880 my soul and suckled until it flickered out, like a dead star in the 176 00:19:36.079 --> 00:19:41.960 night sky. But through the words of this strange girl, it has begun 177 00:19:42.079 --> 00:19:48.519 to retreat. Its greed, for my essence has faltered, and the feast 178 00:19:48.559 --> 00:19:55.720 of suffering no longer satisfies its fading appetite, a craving for something else, 179 00:19:56.440 --> 00:20:02.759 a longing for what I've feared so long, bonds from my center. It 180 00:20:02.920 --> 00:20:08.119 blooms through my veins and reaches as far as my extremities will allow. My 181 00:20:08.240 --> 00:20:15.359 soul begins to shine once again. Its warmth releases my inner self from the 182 00:20:15.400 --> 00:20:22.119 slowing cold of dead space. Stand up, Lennard, you don't have to 183 00:20:22.160 --> 00:20:26.720 crawl any longer. I didn't know it was possible until I heard those words. 184 00:20:27.920 --> 00:20:33.680 They had to be spoken, else the metamorphosis could never take place. 185 00:20:33.599 --> 00:20:41.079 It was like a spell to break myself imposed punishment. I'd banished myself from 186 00:20:41.200 --> 00:20:47.559 humanity, shoved away the pursuit of happiness, the right to joy, a 187 00:20:47.759 --> 00:20:55.640 human right while I didn't think I deserved. I shed my carapace of self 188 00:20:55.759 --> 00:21:03.640 loathing and push myself up, Straighten my cramped and crooked legs. Bones crack 189 00:21:03.960 --> 00:21:11.759 from their strained positions. As I straightened myself, I stand tall, breathe 190 00:21:12.119 --> 00:21:18.200 deep. My face looks forward, no longer pointed to the ground, at 191 00:21:18.200 --> 00:21:23.400 my own filth, at the failth of the world. See. I don't 192 00:21:23.400 --> 00:21:27.000 know why you thought of yourself as a rat. You have no tail, 193 00:21:27.160 --> 00:21:33.640 silly. I look down at my hands and curled my fingers to my palms, 194 00:21:33.799 --> 00:21:41.039 my human fingers, my human palms. She's right, I don't have 195 00:21:41.279 --> 00:21:48.839 a tail, nor does fur cover my body. I'd left my humanity behind 196 00:21:48.039 --> 00:21:55.359 at some point, being lost in this place so long I couldn't stand to 197 00:21:55.400 --> 00:22:00.799 be me, to be the lonely and unloved, the forgotten and ignored. 198 00:22:00.559 --> 00:22:07.440 I lost every one long ago, and so I misplaced myself here. But 199 00:22:07.599 --> 00:22:15.319 now I have a voice. I have the power to start again, to 200 00:22:15.480 --> 00:22:22.319 make a life to live. Come limmed. You won't be lost any longer 201 00:22:22.359 --> 00:22:27.079 if you leave this place. I look at her with watery eyes. My 202 00:22:27.200 --> 00:22:34.799 hands tremble as nerves fire in bursts of reanimating energy. I speak for the 203 00:22:34.839 --> 00:22:41.000 first time, use the will of force. I've been gifted. I'm afraid. 204 00:22:41.960 --> 00:22:48.720 She motions with her hand and behind her the elevator doors open. I 205 00:22:48.839 --> 00:23:12.279 take a deep breath and step inside. Thank you for listening to episode two 206 00:23:12.440 --> 00:23:18.400 of season five. Today's author was Lee Andrew Foreman with his story Carapass. 207 00:23:18.079 --> 00:23:23.640 Today's story featured Graham Rowitt as Leonard and Ambercollins as Victoria. Our season five 208 00:23:23.680 --> 00:23:30.559 producers are Daniel Foytech and Meg Williams. Our resident composer and music director is 209 00:23:30.640 --> 00:23:34.000 Nico Vites of We Talk Of Dreams. Our art director is Janet Andromeda. 210 00:23:34.359 --> 00:23:38.799 Artwork for today's episode was created by Greg Schaefer, our webmaster and graphic designer. 211 00:23:40.160 --> 00:23:44.319 Our editors are Meg Williams and Daniel Foytech. To find out more about 212 00:23:44.359 --> 00:23:48.839 today's contributors and all the members of our team, please visit Victoria'slift dot com 213 00:23:48.880 --> 00:23:52.240 and check out their biopages. If you'd like to help us keep bringing you 214 00:23:52.319 --> 00:23:56.079 Victoria's adventures, please consider supporting us on Patreon at patreon dot com, forward 215 00:23:56.119 --> 00:24:00.599 Slash Victoria's Lift. Victoria's Lift is created by Ninth Story of Studios LLLC. 216 00:24:02.240 --> 00:24:03.319 All rights reserved.