WEBVTT

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All right, here we go with
the Minnesota goodbye. I'm going to dive

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right into an email. Here we
go, good morning, Dave and Crue.

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I loved hearing Bailey talk about her
love for Joe Mauer as a young

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girl. I too had the delusional
dream that I would someday meet him.

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We would fall head over heels in
love. This is before he was married.

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But I got a funny story about
Joe that I would love to share.

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I was in my early twenties going
to college in Western Wisconsin. The

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background of my laptop was a picture
of Joe Mauer. On the first day

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of class, a girl sat down
next to me and said, Oh,

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do you like Joe Mauer. I
said, yeah, I'm going to marry

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him someday. The girl said,
oh, he's my brother in law.

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Pretty sure. My jaw hit the
floor at that comment. I will admit

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a small part of me probably thought, holy cow, I have a shot

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at meeting him. Ha ha.
Well. I ended up having many classes

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with that girl. She was very
private, never mentioned Joe again. I

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know her claim was legitimate though,
and her sibling is married to Joe's sibling.

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Oh wow, any who. One
of those moments when you realize what

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a small world we really live in. I would love to hear other people's

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stories about meeting Joe Mauer or even
meeting other Minnesota's celebrities. Thanks for reading,

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Please don't say my name. I
think it's an adorable story. Yes,

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I already told my story about Joe
Mauer, the one with the glasses

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where I said he looked hung glasses
and he said, thanks you too.

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But I when I met lou Ford, because lou Ford was my favorite baseball

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player at that time in two thousand
and five ish, and I met him

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on one day. It was just
like a regular meet and greet. I

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think I just said, you know, you're my favorite baseball player, blah

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blah blah. And then I got
my picture taken with him at this meet

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and greet. And then he had
another meet and greet the next day,

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and I met him again the next
day, but my mom printed out the

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picture that we had taken the day
before to have him sign the picture I

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got us I got from the day
before, which seems kind of creepy,

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and I did hug him without asking
permission. I was so freaking Jazz.

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I was also like fourteen years old. And was just like weird, you

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know what for? Yeah, I
think that people like, you know,

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like if somebody meets you and they're
excited enough that they're like, they got

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a picture the day before they came
back, they want you to sign it

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and they want a hug, and
you're there for an appearance. I mean,

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if I was having dinner at Cucumbers
with my family and this little lass

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whole fourteen year old girl came up
with a fucking picture, I'd like,

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take my salad and I'd throw it
at her. Oh but if I'm there

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for a meet and greet, sure, then I'd be like, oh that's

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worst. Okay, So at least
that's comforting because my mom makes it out

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to seem like he was turned off
by that entire experience. Oh no,

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I think one of the most flattering
things that people. And it amazes me

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when like a twenty year old,
usually a woman somebody young like, will

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see him on that shinedown cruise sir, and they'll be like, can I

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have a hug? And it's like, I am so flattered that I mean

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enough to you that you want a
hug to me. That is like really

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powerful, that's very touching. So
it doesn't happen very often. Stay fair.

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Like multiple years in a row,
people have just like handed me their

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babies and been like, here you
go, let's all get a picture,

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and like they like trust me enough
that they're like giving me their child right

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away. And I'm like, okay, sure I would a baby, baby,

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Yeah, hand me your baby,
Chow writes in Regular staff writer.

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Chow says, it's funny how you
sing that song when you saw the Swift

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for power mop Swift for power Mop
on top of the dryer. Every day

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when I come home, I drive
past the street called Harvester, and I

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sing the Hollister song Harvester, Harvester
down at Harvester. Whoa h A r

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V E s T E R Yeah
h A r V Okay, we get

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the idea. That's so funny.
I love it. And also about the

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kissing thing. Everybody thinks they know
how to kiss, even my wife,

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who's only been with one or two
guys. I've been with about ten women

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in my lifetime, and I never
claim to be a pro. I think

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you know you're a good kisser if
you're really enjoying it. I think I

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don't know, but they're right.
Chow. You're right, everybody thinks they're

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a great kisser. What if you
even told you're a good kisser. If

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you have to ask, then it's
not legit. But if they go,

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WHOA, you're a really good kisser, then that's legit. Can I ask

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you kind of like a dirty question, please do okay? If I don't

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know how much I can? Okay. If a guy says, oh,

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you're so good at like pleasing me
specifically, is that a lie just so

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that you'll do it more? Or
is that possibly she's talking about a specific

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a specific talking about a blowjob?
Are you're worried to bring you don't want

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to bring up the word blowjob?
You know what I'm supposed to say?

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Okay, Well, if a guy
says, like, you're so good at

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giving blue jobs, does that just
is that what they're saying to make you

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do it more? Or I don't
think so. I think he's probably sincere

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because then if he says you're good, then you're not going to change.

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Sure if you said so, if
he said something like, oh, you

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know what, you need to use
your hand a little bit more or whatever.

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So if he says you're good,
it's like then he approves of that

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method, and he doesn't want you
to change. Okay, so he wouldn't

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lie. I don't think sure.
Now, if you lie, then you

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think you're doing a good job.
You're not doing a good job. Oh

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okays, like you're using your teeth
a lot. Don't use teeth just a

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little bit. Though it depends on
your guy. Sometimes maybe guy likes the

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little teeth in there. So no, I think he's actually he's enjoying it.

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Okay, cool, Okay, I'm
going to delete this email and I'm

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going to bring up the loofa.
Okay, okay about that? Yeah,

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wig, yeah, you know what
I want to get. There's like this

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kind of like it's it's a version
of a loofa, but it's called like

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an African mesh something or other,
and it's like a long loofah, like

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if you took a loofa and you
unraveled the entire thing. And apparently it's

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super nice and like much better than
a loofah, and it dries easier and

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it doesn't like mold or anything.
So sounds I mean, it sounds like

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something I want to check out,
but I have no idea where to buy

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it. But Anyway, that's my
loof a talk for the day. I

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think you know you want to bring
up loof of talk again, then bring

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it up and we'll see what happened. Let's see, there are a couple

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of more. Let me click on
this one, don't same a name.

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Dave was talking about accidentally injuring his
brother in law or somebody else on the

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pontoon boat that was last week,
and then asked what others did to injure

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somebody else. Well, I have
a few, but it wasn't me that

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did the injuring. I was just
there growing up. I was the oldest.

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I had two younger siblings. All
of us are three years apart from

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the next sibling. My sister,
unfortunately, is the youngest of three with

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two older brothers. She probably got
more injured than us three. One time,

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a brother's swinging a hockey stick like
a baseball bat whacked her in the

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face, injuring her nose. To
this day we think her nose was broken

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and healed them properly, but at
the time we didn't know it was broken.

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So in other words, sisters got
a crooked ass nose or something,

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you know, m hm. Another
time she was climbing a fence after my

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brother and his friend, and when
she jumped down on the other side,

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she landed on a basketball. Now, imagine you land on a basketball is

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going to roll away and it's not
going to catch you. She injured her

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ankle in foot. Another time,
she's riding bitch on a bike, sitting

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on the handlebars, and when the
bike went over a bump, her foot

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slid through the spokes and injured her
ankle. Unfortunately, I do not remember

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which of the ankle injuries occurred first, and she was under the age of

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ten all of the causes. All
this to say, the causes of her

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injuries were likely due to her hanging
out with her brothers. Don't worry,

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she is fine now with her own
kids. Right. Thanks for the laugh.

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I usually only have time for the
Minnesota Goodbye these days, but I

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hope to get back on track with
listening daily. Hey, I'm really happy

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listening even to the Minnesota Goodbye.
Yeah. It always terrified me to write

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bitch on handlebars because I think we've
all done it. Oh I've never,

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Oh really, oh I've never.
Oh yeah as a child all the time,

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Wow, yeah, I think I'm
my brother, my friend's bike.

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It would be like, Okay,
you get on the handlebars really for no

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practical reason, sure, except just
to try something. Oh, we would

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do it because we wouldn't have enough
bike to get from front one friend's house

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to another. So it really dry, bitch and whatever or like. My

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parents lived decently close to each other
once they got divorced, so then we'd

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bike use one of my bikes to
get in between houses sometimes. So yeah,

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all the time, it was terrifying. I didn't like it. I

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didn't mind being the person who was
actually peddling. It was like a little

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bit harder, but yeah, riding
on it was not fun. I'd like

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I'd liked those the pegs that they
had on the back the back wheel,

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those I could do. I could
do the pegs because then you just stand

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and it's like a motorcycle and you
hold on. But having to like balance

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on handlebars absolutely not, because you're
gonna go tip forward or tip backward you

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hit a bump or something. Yeah, to play it out on the ground,

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I'll talk about the worst bike wreck
we ever got into. Okay,

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and I've told my story a million
times. I put a parachute on my

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bike. The parachute got caught up
in the in the back wheel, and

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I went down hard and scraped up
my side. And I've told the story

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a million times. Tell me about
the worst bike wreck you either of you

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two got into, Jenny Daily,
I don't know that one thing that's unique.

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I mean, I've fallen off a
bike plenty of times when I was

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younger, but nothing like super unique. I don't think you never tried to

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do a stunt or do a wheeling
and got a concussion or anything like that.

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No, I mean I skateboarded and
I hurt myself skateboarding once, hitting

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like a big bump when I was
going way too fast, and then I

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dislocated my shoulder, and so I
had to go to the yard. Well,

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maybe that's our topic. The worst
childhood injury from doing something sporty or

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stupid, you know, I think
that was probably mine. I was very

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fortunate not too sporty stupid do anything
worse than the parachute on the bicycle.

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Yeah, but we did a lot
of dumb things. There used to be

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a big, big, deep ditch
by our house that was kind of like

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a ravine, and so we made, you know how like a skateboard park

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will have all these dips and hills
and that type of thing. So we

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would ride our bikes down these steep
hills and ride around the edge, and

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the momentum would keep you hugging the
side of the ravine, and we never

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got hurt. It was just dumb
stuff to do. We could have easily

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gotten very hurt, but I should
have been hurt so many more times as

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a child, I feel like I
did dumb things. They had a kind

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of like a half pipe in this
one church parking lot, and it was

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super sketchy. There were never parents
around, and we would bike to it

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and we'd like pretend like we were
going to go on it, but we

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usually didn't because it was like so
sketchy. I think I got like a

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part of it and went down it, not from all the way up the

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top. And so there are multiple
times I did jump on a bed and

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fall off, hit my head and
get stitches in my head once as well.

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I was like your stereotypical kid who
was like, don't jump on the

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bed, and I hurt myself.
I don't know what else I never really

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did any I'm not like a sporty
person and Honestly, I didn't learn how

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to ride a bike for a long
time. Really, I didn't learn how

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to ride bike until I was eight. Oh okay, that's a little bit

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like that. Yeah, see that. It's funny like as adults you look

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at oh, eight years old,
that doesn't seem that late, But when

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you're eight years old, everyone is
riding a bike except for you. And

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I had to. I taught myself
on Mother's Day and I would just go

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up a hill and then try and
balance on the way down. And I

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just went from like not knowing how
to knowing how. I didn't do the

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like training wheels thing. I just
went It's interesting you say that because I

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also was like trying to just learn
one day. I did training wheels first,

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and I was trying to learn one
day and my parents gave up.

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And then I just got on it
and started doing it on my own.

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And suddenly I like had it.
Yeah, you just got to figure it

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out. Yeah it suddenly you had
it. I think. I remember the

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first time I think I had training
wheels. And training wheels really don't help

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you, No, they actually make
it worse. They yeah, because they

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do all the work for you.
But isn't it funny how you get on

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a bike as an eight year Once
you learn how to ride a bike,

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it is so effortless, it is
so effortless. But until you get it,

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it's like, how in the fuck
am I going to keep this bike

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up? How do I keep it
up? And I think if you google

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why does a bike stand up?
Science has not recognized an answer as to

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why a bike stands out? Really
weird. I was gonna say, I

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thought I would have involved just like
momentum, you would think so because the

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faster you go. But I read
this somewhere in the last year that science

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has never determined exactly why a bicycle
stands up. And I don't know,

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maybe I'm wrong about that one,
but you know, another mystery. And

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that is it for the Minnesota Goodbye. We're a little short on emails,

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so if you want to send in
an email about your childhood injury or anything

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you want to bring up, then
go ahead and send that in to Ryan's

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show at KDWB dot com. And
if we read your email and you don't

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have a staff rider sticker, we
would love to send you an official Minnesota

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Goodbye staff rider sticker to put on
your yetti, to put on your stanley,

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to put on your computer, to
put on your put it on your

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forehead. I don't care. Whatever
you're going to do, we'll send that

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over to you. And that is
it for the Minnesota. Goodbye,