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No ads, All us Dan. We have a really special episode today.
We are joined by Iraq war veteran and recent France visitor Jack Mandevil to talk
about what our relationship with France since the beginning of this country, since the
beginning of the United States of America, and even a little bit before that.
We're talking about France and whether or not we owe them an apology for
all the mean, stinky like they're cheese things we say about them. And
Jack is here to help discuss how the French people feel about America. He
was recently at the eightieth anniversary of D Day in Norman Dy, France.
Big expert on the subject, one of the funniest guys we know. We
are really really excited and without further ado today's episode, Welcome to soft Core
History. Welcome back to Softcore History. I'm your host for the week.
Dam Redchester and I'm joined us always by Rob Fox. What's going on Baby?
And special guest back from Normandy, Jack Mendeville, Jecille, Jimmabelle,
Danielle. Ah, you didn't take my pickup line advice, by the way,
I DMed you something to say to a French lady to just drop the
panties. Oh, I don't. I was not hitting on any chicks over
there. I was just eating back at, smoking cigarettes and drinking espresso.
Damn it. That's how you hit on French. There's no time to be
hitting on women, are there. Damn it? Dude. I wanted you
to say it to somebody that seems by the book though. Yeah, that
seems like how you would get a French chick ignore them, smoke cigarettes,
eat a big at. Oh yeah, you know. It was hilarious.
Uh uh. Jared is attempting his best Ben Franklin out. While he was
out in France. He went into clean up on all the French ladies he
was sitting on, like seventy year old women. Yeah, I mean he
was. He had the age range pretty wide. I don't think the French.
French women don't really connect with Americans. And then he went into Germany,
and he was just like as happy as can be. They love American
men over there. Somehow. It's you know, your abuser, you tend
to feel more connected to them in a weird way. Like it's not Stockholm
syndrome, because that's a different thing, but yeah, it's kind of just
you're you're held hostage. We've beaten them horribly twice, and they feel,
you know, like a weird connection to that. Yeah. Yeah, just
want to make us happy. They're just yeah, they're just trying to follo
us around and please us. Are you okay? Are you mad at me?
Are you mad at me? You better this time? Baby? Yeah?
I gotta say the relationship we have with the French is almost that of
an older cousin that helps us out in our youth. But then they get
more and more jealous as you've become successful. Hm. I could see that,
Like it's like, no, dude, you don't. I'm still better
than you. That's why I helped you, because I thought I'd always be
better than just a groan resentment like yeah, I provided a roof over your
head, I gave you some money, advice, naval power. Yeah,
yeah, now we'll talking about this because you were in D Day or you
were in France June sixth, nineteen forty four. I was there. He
was there, Yeah, just popping off German guys. He went to Normandy
for the eightieth anniversary of D Day. I did. Yeah, Holy moly,
how was that? That was something else I said. I said,
I don't know if I could ever do another one of these, because of
how amazing this first time. I'd be disappointed if I went over there again.
It was just so amazing being there for the eightieth with dude. I
was escorting World War Two veterans around, and I'm sure we'll talk about it
in the show. Yeah, the French I felt like I was escorting the
Beatles around. They were mobbing our van and like we had to like get
out and yell people to get away. Like they were handing these guys babies.
Like I've never seen anything like. I've been around some, you know,
celebrities before, I've never seen anything like that. But I'm almost positive
you've interviewed every World War Two veteran that's still alive. It seems like it.
It seems like it. Yeah, and at this point, it's not
all you know, the ones that they have there. They're not all D
Day veterans, because there's probably maybe five of those guys. Yeah, no
joke. So now it's just like, hey, you served. I mean,
I was with a guy named Alan. He was awesome. He's hilarious,
and he's like, I don't know anything about this man. I saw
the Japanese maybe twice while I was out there. Yeah. It's interesting though
that we brought up, you know, your time in France, our relationship
with the French. It's actually what the episode today is about America's relationship with
France, our entire relationship with the French. Sweet. That's a good analogy.
You use the cousin thing, but like the thing is the cousin.
From what I saw, the cousin still loves you. Even though there is
resentment, they roll their eyes at you, they do still love you because
you're still family at the end of the year's still family. Yeah. So
the idea of America as a concept itself could be pointed to colonists in just
in French political philosophy that would shape our own who is it again? There
was one guy in particular, I have a few Okay, there's one name
that's gonna jump out to me. A servant in the late eighteenth century by
Donald Lutz stated that French philosopher Montesquieu was the most quoted man in the British
Americas, cited more by the Founding Fathers than any other source outside of the
Bible, even more than John Locke or anything like that. Damn. They
were the real Enlightenment motherfuckers over there. Huh oh. Yeah. We also
had Jean Jacques Russo and the Social Contract, okay, really hit home with
the colonist and influenced the Declaration of Independence. Which is funny because they all
like kind of fucking hated the French, like they liked their thinking, like
they liked the philosophy, but like they just fought a war with them.
They disdained at least the French government because it was like the English monarchy was
already a constitutional monarchy, although still like the king was still in control,
but like the French was an absolute monarch yep, like a full yeah yeah,
yeah, yeah, Like it was a full on. There was the
what do they call the not the estates, but there was a kind of
a parliament in France, but it was called at the King's leisure and not
that often. Yeah, because that's where the estates come from, the first
state, second state, third estate, and that's actually where the terms left
and right wing come from. Oh I did not know that. Yeah,
there was a people sat on the left, people sat on the right,
people sat on the left where the annoying shit libs and people sat on the
right. Was like the church and fucking a yeah oh yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, I just said the church. I didn't think I needed
to add context to Yeah. Yeah, and you you see how much being
out in France, you see how much of a grip that the church had
on that had. I don't know if they still do, but every small,
tiny town you go to five hundred people and it's the most extravagant you
know. Yeah, I mean, and kudos to Catholic architecture. It is
phenomenal. It's the only good building in the whole fucking town for the best
part. Yeah, it is. It's just and every single town had the
most beautiful church in it. They put a lot of money in. I
think churches in France were kind of like high school football stadiums in Texas,
like it was the town's flex. Yeah, you know what I mean,
ye, like nothing else mattered, just to have a dope church. So
Russo kind of believed that all men and women are created equal. That sound
familiar, well, but sounds pretty freaking woke to me. An elected government
by the people would protect rights like freedom of speech, religion, and those
elected to if they did not uphold their duty to the people, they will
be removed. So essentially, bar for bar. The Declaration of Independence,
also Montsusque essentially came up with a power of checks and balances in government and
that no man need be afraid of another. James Madison was a huge monsuscue
guy. Okay, not Jefferson, more Madison. Okay, who is I
believe the father of the Constitution. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Madison I
think was yeah, the big guy for that. But oh no, I'm
thinking of the Declaration. Jefferson was the Declaration of Madison was the concert.
Yeah, Jefferson wrote the Declaration and Adams and Franklin edited it. Yeah.
And then John Hancock came in and just fucking just showed up in the fourth
quarter like I did this. Yeah. Yeah. Not to mention, Continental
Congress was able to secure money, clothing, ammunition, and supplies provided by
the French in Spanish by the fall of seventeen seventy five through a shell company
called Rodrigue Hordelais in company created by French playwright and watchmaker an international arms dealer,
Pierre but Marchie. What a what a life? Can you imagine?
If he's worth an episode himself? Aaron Sorkin was just and guns to Ukraine
on the side. We've had, you know, our Hemingway types, but
yeah, you know more about this guy Hemingway, though. I don't think
Hemingway wanted to do anything other than get shot at and shoot at people.
Yeah, Like he was just like bully, a man fights, takes us
one square to the jar. He's not a man. You know his D
Day story, right, Hemingway's. Yeah. They at that point he was
already a living legend, Like he was already an icon, and the Army
was like, we're not going to get Ernest Hemingway killed. So they didn't
allow him. They didn't allow him on the beach until like everything was secured.
Yeah, and then they they they really hindered his ability to move and
he just said f this and he he left. The US Army got you
know, because he spoke French because he had lived there, right, he
got hooked up with some French resistance guys and basically was breaking the Geneva Convention,
leading a group of French resistance around and killing Germans. Good lord,
and then they actually they actually is that what a Farewell to Arms is based
on? That was his first go around? Yeah over there. Yeah,
he was just real horny to get just fucking shot at. Yeah. And
they actually if they either came very close to or they did, they brought
him up on essentially war crime charges. Hemy because he's a gernalist. Who
brought him up on the US Army did oh really? Yeah? And then
but and then oh because he was there to write about it. He did
so many freaking operations as a civilian writer around France that they end up giving
him, if I'm not mistaken, a Bronze Star as a civilian, Like
it's on the record, Ernest Hemingway has a Bronze Star from the Second World
War as a civilian. That's insane. Yeah, so our boy. Beaumarcha
constantly described his own life as always at combat because he was always trying to
fight up hill. He provided all this financial aid, had millions of livers
in finite weapons money to the colonies while their own economy was on the vergic
collapse in Oh yeah, playing a major role in winning the revolution. And
how did we thank this vital man in our triumph. Dudes like Arthur Lee
and other members of Congress told him to kick rocks. Why, like,
we're not paying you back. Oh my god, Arthur Lee. Now that
name sound sounds very American of them. Let me look at that guy's definitely
related to Roberty Lee. They were all related if you heard the Lee name
up until the late nineteenth century, they were all related to each other.
They all came from that Yeah, Henry Lighthorse Lee lineage. But don't worry.
We paid back Beau Marches in eighteen thirty five when he was thirty six
years dead. Oh yeah, of course. Yeah, so his estate got
some money. Yeah, well that's nice. His kids got some money.
You know, quit whining. You're gonna give it to your kids. On
the time in history where I can recall the United States righted or wrong,
like you know, at the relatively right time is when in the nineties they
acknowledge how fed up the Japanese in tournament was and kind of compensated those families.
Yeah, they did get reparations. Yeah, and even that that was
still like what fifty sixty years fifty sixty years later, fifty fifty change.
But like, that's the only time I can think of where like, if
you look at you know, the big checklist of things that we weren't necessarily
the best boys on, that's the only time I can think we're like,
oh, yeah, we fucked up. Here's money. Sorry. Yeah,
I mean there was even they were suing, they were taking cases to the
Supreme Court at the time. Yeah, for the for the whole thing,
although it's hard to you're not going to commit I mean, I guess the
Supreme Court like half of it is like, oh, we're going to rule
on if it's you know, like if this is constitutional. But another half
is like, oh, is there precedent or whatever? You know, what
is their precedent to, like I guess, quote like abuse of power in
wartime, which there was plenty of precedent for that. Lincoln suspended habeas corpus,
So they were like, yeah, fuck, you're I mean, it's
corpus. Yeah, we don't, we don't care. Lincoln did it things
like what the what's the bush thing that he did? The Patriot Act and
all that kind of stuff. Now, Beau Marche was only one avenue of
aid. In total, France contributed something astronomical like one point seven billion livers
and ninety percent of all gunpowder used by war's end. This is this,
like fact is what makes me want to slam my head against the wall when
you hear like isolationist Americans talk about Ukraine. I'm not saying we owe Ukraine
support or anything like that, but when people say shit like you can't defend
your own country with your own shit, you to day to be independent,
that we did not. We had a lot of help, all the fucking
help in the world. We don't win that war without French help. Yeah.
Yeah, it was not a bunch of farmers that freed the United States.
No, like at fucking all, that is a myth. Well,
I mean people also forget it was uh already the population was either indifferent or
was actually pro Oh we talked about that on the show before. The highest
the approval rating ever got for the revolution was like forty percent, which is
crazy. Yeah, because I'm not I think it's more. I think indifference
and loyalists were like kind of tied roughly. You know, Ah, this
doesn't affect me. I'm right, I'm fucking yeah. I don't want to
get cannonball through the freaking face face. Yeah, but dude like it just
because like, look at look at lou what happened. We rebelled against the
biggest superpower in the world and immediately went to the only other two countries that
remotely resembled superpowers in uh fucking well, not even the dut well they were
in an economic power, but like in for military support, France and Spain.
We went to the Dutch for money, and we also went to the
other sort of pre eminent military power at the time, the Prussians, for
help with training. Yeah. What's his name, Fredick? Yeah uh.
We don't win the war without a Prussian military officer pretty much running our army
teach US soldiers. Yeah yeah, the same way NATO taught Ukraine how to
have an army and not just some slap dick Russian backwoods version of an army,
because the rush, the way the Russians organized their army is like dogshit
compared to you basically any Western army. Yeah, uh for the Russian Army
from what I understand, like it's so officer heavy, and it's so directed
on orders and do what you're told, like like like in the US military,
like you could have your whole squad wiped out and you're like a PFC
and you're like, well, I guess I'm in charge now, and you
you actually do have the means to take charge. Yeah, we're in the
Russian military. It's like, no, just do what you're told. If
that guy gets killed, we're all fucked. Yeah. There is no NCO
system in the Russian basically just about every firearm at Saratoga, one of the
most pivotal moments in the war was a French weapon. The victory resulted in
the Treaty of Alliance and Treaty of Amity and Commerce, which gave the colony's
legitimacy to the rest of Europe. Not to mention other than a few lunatics
like John Paul Jones, we didn't have a navy. Yeah, John Paul
Jones, sick dude, Go listen to our episode about him. Absolute animal
right, But like like I said, lunatic, Yeah, was that your
episode? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, I got that was a good one,
but France sent over sixty three warships with twenty two thousand men to combat
that brought it British blockade and dominance on the ocean, along with twelve thousand
foot soldiers, and helped secure victories in the Chesapeake and at Yorktown where Lafayette
cornered corn Wallace and essentially secured the dub And you know why the other American
revolution didn't win the Civil War, the Confederate Revolution, if you want to
call it that. The closest they got is the British sent them some observers
to see if they wanted to get involved, but they never committed it.
No naval power, So people were breaking Britain's blockade on us. No one
broke the Union blockade on the Confederacy. That was what they That's really what
they They didn't really need the troops, Like obviously you always want more troops,
right, the Confederates, But what they really fucking needed was the money
and the navy and the navy. And we'll get to the French involvement in
the Civil War. Oh hell yeah, oh, I can't wait for that.
But yeah, dude, like and Saratoga to your point, earlier.
That is essentially like the Gettysburg of the American Revolution. That is Yeah,
that's the turning point. It's more or less this isn't just some little skirmish
that the British are going to squash. Then, ge Dubs, you brought
up a good point earlier too, that like are founding fathers, guys like
George Washington had served in the British Army the majority of his life. Yeah,
so there was going to be some built in animosity towards the French,
and all of a sudden they come and save the fucking day. That changes
the whole dynamic. Oh yeah, I mean it was like the Seven Years
War slash French and Indian War, which she was a veteran of, he
was a veteran started it because allegedly started the war. I want to I
still need to get into that episode about how I didn't want to kind of
like, you know, step on your territory there, so I avoided that
for this episode. But Washington, I mean the Seven Years War slashed the
frenchman Nion War was just what it was called here. That was the First
World War, that was the first true global conflict, and it was for
different countries on different continents, navies all over the world. Yeah, and
that was listing the indigenous populations to fight for them. That flipped the power
for good, Like that put England in charge for good, because that was
a that was a sort of like exist Like it didn't destroy France, but
like that was an existential conflict where who is going to be number one throughout
the world, France or England essentially, and France fucking lost and England from
then on through up through World War two number one. Yeah. So after
Yorktown, the British soon come to the negotiating table and the colonies in France
agreed they would only make terms as a tandem, not separate from the with
the Brits. Oh, it was like the has to friends, We're all
going to negotiate together. Six years later, the French overthrow the Purple regime
burbone rip, and the US starts to sour on our feelings for these people.
They gave us help for our very own independence. Now and they're and
their revolution. We Americans like revolution. We beat the murders. We were
so awesome that when they do when they did that their revolution, they went
all in our our revolution was economic. Theirs was personal. There was yeah,
deeply like so that's kind of what's scared off a lot of Americans was
the reign of terror. Yeah, which, oh, you guys are nuts,
actually rightfully should scare you off. They were fucking psycho and but Jefferson,
from what I understand, Jefferson was all about it. He was he
was basically trying to rabble rouse all that bitch. You would get your head
cut off. Yeah, you fucking live on a plantation, you own human
beings. I love Thomas jeff I think he's awesome. I don't think a
single like Thomas Jefferson's statute she get taken down. But oh my god,
there's some hypocrisy there. Oh but the worst one. But forget the fucking
freedom versus slavery shit like that. The blood of the tree of liberty must
be refreshed from timetime with the blood of patriots and tires. That guy never
picked up a rifle in his life. Yeah, and I don't think he
ever said that. I think the debate's still out whether he's Oh, is
that not even necessarily from what I've been told, Yeah, So I don't
know. It's it's commonly attributed to him, but I think there's evidence that
he never see. But even just the social upheaval, like oh yeah,
like it is literally like a college professor who makes half a million dollars a
year. Yeah, being like on the side of the proletariat or something like,
Yeah, dude, you are fucking one of the wealthiest people in the
country. You are the one percent. You're just cause playing as I don't
even fucking know what. Yeah, like you're just bored. You're fucking bored.
So not Jefferson, but Thomas Paine actually had his head on the guillotine
in Paris in seventeen ninety four and was saved last minute by James Monroe.
Wow. Wow, I didn't realize that. I did not know the ambassador.
Was there a reason why he was He's a diplomat yet, Okay,
there's a lot of things I learned about James Monroe in this episode, and
he's dope. Yeah, Monroe is sick. Monroe doctrine nothing to do with
the mone Monto doctrines. Dope. Seventeen ninety three, the Brits double penetrate
France from all angles and Washington formally recognizes the new government but decides to sit
out with the proclamation of neutrality. So France is getting kind of butt fucked
by both sides during their own revolution by the English, and we're like,
you know what, we're sitting this one out, guys. Technically speaking,
it was Louis the sixteenth who came to our aid, not the French government
that was in currently in power, which is what we said when we didn't
want to pay them back. Yeah, oh no, no, no,
we owe we don't know France money. We owe the Louis money, Kingdom
of France. Yeah, so I don't know what you are the Kingdom of
France now, I don't know. Yeah, what does his contract say?
Yeah, it's fair, it's fair. It's not it's not a bad argument,
it's not. Yeah. Congress agreed and passed the Neutrality Act forbidding any
US citizen from participating in the conflict and prohibited the use of US soil as
a base of operation for either side. I think Washington definitely had to like
rain Jefferson in during that time, like he had to give him a talking
to about that. Fuck. Yeah, I'm sure he did. He was
just like head in the clouds at that point. I do. Like,
that's one of my favorite parts of John the mini series John Adams is that,
like Jefferson just gets like cook here and kok here. Oh yeah,
well that's where I based. Ninety nine point nine percent of my knowledge about
the Revolution is off that HBO mini series. Yeah. Yeah, it's a
good source. It's it's based off of David McCullough novel. Like it's not
like a writer's room with you know what I mean, Like, it's off
like one of the best biographies of all time. Yeah, yeah McCullough.
Uh. Not to go on a tangent here, that guy has he he
has made the underdog and because he did, he did Truman as well.
Yeah, he he's able to paint the underdog as such an awesome John Adams
was always overshadowed by Washington and Jefferson. He did Truman, who was overshadowed
by FDR and yeah, and then JFK two like is yeah, nobody cares
about Truman. Yeah, you find out that these are pretty extraordinary guys.
Yeah, Truman's sick, dude. I love I'm a Missourian though, so
I have to love here. Oh yeah, take a little trip to Independence.
See the Museum. The French, who were still not paid back for
their efforts in our Revolution, felt that it was an act of betrayal by
Washington, and when the Jay Treaty passed between England and the US and seventeen
ninety four, they saw it as an act of hostility towards their nation.
It's like, can you bet I don't know how much the French were invested
in the American relation, but like, can you imagine there's just this like
world altering revolution for like a government by the people you helped in that war.
You help them get that independence, and then you turn around and you're
like, we want our own democracy too, And then you turn back and
you're like yeah, bros. And you're and they're like, ah, we
just kind of we just didn't want to. And there's we signed almost with
the people that you helped them get independence from, right right who. By
the way, England was like but I think before the United States you could
plausibly say that either England or like the Dutch was essentially like the freest country
in the world. Like England was not a tyrannical No, and our system
of government to this day is very much based off of what they were doing.
They had a genuine constitutional monarchy, like a representative system that had been
there for centuries. Yes, they had already gone through their civil war,
through their civil war, through their question with themselves about what are human rights?
What are citizens rights? Yeah, they were pretty ahead of the curve.
What are civil rights? Yeah, and we were like, hey,
fuck you Yeah, no, well, and let's be honest, and I
know you guys have covered this and we just talked about it earlier, our
founding fathers and incredible figures. I'm glad it all went down. But the
fact is their decision for a revolution had less to do with ideals and it
was more economic. Yeah. Yeah, so they're yeah, see, I
think the economic opportunity or i'm sorry, the economic necessity presented them with the
philosophical opportunity. Yeah, you know what I mean. They were. They
they were like they were well read and all that. Yeah, they were
a running back hitting a hole, right. They were like like, once
they realized they could maybe put all the fun reading that they did into practice,
they did it, but only after the economics forced them again French reading.
Yeah, the average colonial had a pretty nice life. Those taxes really
didn't affect them and them. Certain quite a few of them were pissed off,
but that stuff only affected like the one percent. Yeah, that's why
you need ship like the Boston massacre to rile up everyone that happened to the
common man. Yes, which, by the way, all those soldiers got
a fair trial. Oh. I posted a clip the other day justified police
shooting. They were throwing rocks at him and someone yelled fire, Yeah,
as in shoot like from behind them. Yeah, it'd be ironic to see
if you see, you know, the people today that will find like any
excuse why a cop? Yeah, like, but they it'll be interesting to
which side they would have taken back then when. So on the other end
of that, I when I think maybe it was George Lloyd, maybe it
was one of the other fucking hundred, uh whatever. However, many there
was something something get to the point, caused a kerfuffle in the news about
a black guy getting shot by a cop. And I saw several people on
the on the liberal side be like like, be like essentially pose the Boston
massacre. It'd be like, see this unjustified police shooting is what caused the
revolution, so you should be against like the police essentially whatever, and I
wanted to be like, oh boy, I got bad news for you guys.
That was one hundred justifier. Speaking of the Boston massacre, John Adams
sent diplomats over to France in seventeen ninety seven to cool the tension, only
for those representatives to be with a pay to play scheme. Upon their arrival,
the French officials demanded bribes before they would meet with any American and Adams
was appalled by the whole ordeal. This would later be known as the x
y Z Affair, which escalated to the Quasi War, which was two years
of our navies having an on site policy in the West Indies. Okay,
so mostly in the like, not in the Atlantic, just in the West
Indies. Just a lot of maritime chaos. God damn. Like they would
just like kidnap our soldiers. Yes, I mean that was like a thing
like forever like piracy. It was as much about like taking slaves dudes.
Yeah, being like like that's what the War of eighteen twelve was over.
That's what the Barbary pirates were doing. I guess that's what they were really
Like a lot of piracy. It's like oh for plunder and it's like,
no, give me, give me the people. Yeah, the people is
my plunder. Yeah. The whole human trafficking, that's not a new concept.
There's no If you open a real pirates treasure chest, it's just twenty
babies inside and they're gonna sell them one day. Yeah. Our navy held
their own and disrupted French trade enough that they resolve their issues with us by
the year eighteen hundred with the agreement that we would not interrupt in the wars
of Napoleon. So was Napoleon was in charge at this point, So they
finally had a central authority, and a pragmatic, super intelligent one at that.
Speaking of the Poleman, eighteen oh three, we get hooked up with
perhaps the greatest going out of business sale in human history with the Louisiana Purchase.
Louisiana purchase baby, So I read the other Dad, I didn't realize
this. You know why the Louisiana purchase happened in particular, I'm about to
talk about it, Okay, I'll see if you cover the part of So
Napoleon gets a cool fifteen mil to help fight his wars while also not having
to dump many resources into territory recently taken back from the Spanish. He was
also pretty much out in the New World after the slavery volt in Haiti,
thank got it, yeah, y, and not being able to cash in
sugarcane. Do you do you think his willingness to just dump Louisiana do you
think it's because he knew America was just going to keep pushing west and he
didn't even want to deal with what that was going to look like. I
just don't believe he thought it was the juice was worth the squeeze at that
trying to put resources into the West. Yeah, if he could have gotten
some sort of peace in Europe, he would have turned his attention to the
Americas. And if he could have kept those plantations in Haiti, that would
have like churned over yeah, sugar cane money. I think he would have
kept it. But at that point with the slave revolts, he's like it's
not even worth so. Yeah, But between Haiti and New Orleans he had
a pretty decent like beachhead, I guess you could say, in the New
World. But once Overture Lilvituer fucking did the whole Haitian slavery volt and Haiti
was off the table. It was just like, God, damn, it's
gonna be so much work. It's gonna be like a fucking Vietnam and Haiti
probably they were, well, he's doing twelve other things and he didn't have
peace on the yeah, on the continent, right, so he still has
to deal with fucking England, and shit says, yes, just not,
can't do it. Jefferson then swoops in and sends James Monroe, initially to
get New Orleans and some land around it. But my dude, Monroe comes
back with the country double in size. He continues that sweet, sweet marsh
to manifest destiny. So is Monroe that actually negotiated the deal on behalf of
Jefferson and the the chunk of Louisiana and we got is not just the size
of Louisiana a day. It goes all the way up to like Missouri,
Montana. It is huge. We doubled the country overnight. Yeah. What's
crazy about that, too, is is that so Monroe went with one goal
and comes back with like eight x as like one hundred x as much or
whatever. The same thing happened in reverse at the end of the Mexican American
War. Polk was like, get every fucking ounce of Mexican land. He
can, every fucking thing which went all the way up to Montana. Yeah,
but so California, all this stuff all the way up to I think
we had an organ but like other stuff up there and everything. But his
negotiator, who I do not remember then because he did not become president,
was like, well, I'm not gonna steal all this shit from Mexicans.
I'm just gonna get I'm gonna be reasonable. I'm just gonna take the rest
of the contiguous. What is now that the United States just just several trillion
dollars worth of land and and uh yeah, so he we in the at
the end of the Mexican American War, he the guy actually had orders to
get a fucking like all of Mexico basically like he would orders to be like
just fucking tech, it's ours now, fuck it. And this guy was
like, this is stupid. Let's just take the good stuff. Yeah,
like we don't need this desert and whatever a jungle like fuck. That's how
the borders came to be. In ironically, this whole deal is broken by
British bankers taking American bonds and shipping gold to Paris, France, and England
would then resume their war immediately after this. Gotta get paid, Yeah,
I gotta make sure everything clears first fight again. I mean, I think,
honestly, in a way England. I don't know this at all for
sure, but it makes sense because I don't think England was ever comfortable with
Napoleon being on the throne, and so they knew another war was coming,
so like, let's just get into it. People forget I'm not comparing him
to Hitler by any means, but the way he stormed through the place that
was people in Europe felt the same time then as they did during the rise
of Nazi Germany. They felt the same about Napoleon as they did Hitler,
Like, well, this guy's taking land way too fast. Napoleon was.
They're like Europe, Europe's big bad. You know, the world's big bad.
Now it's Hitler, right, everyone's Hitler, Hitler, Hitler. Before
World War Two, it was Napoleon. So like, the best example I
have that is in Sherlock Holmes, Moriatti is the Napoleon of crime. Yeah,
like he's it's like that. That is the boogeyman. Napoleon is the
worst. He's Genghis Khan. He's like the worst. Do you know what
Napoleon and Hitler also both have in common. They were previously enlisted. What
do you mean they're just enlisted Jack, order to create a Napoleon or a
Hitler, he has to serve first. Well, no, I'm I'm saying
that. Uh, they say, And everyone that's enlisted right now has the
possibility of becoming either Napoleon or Hitler. Yes, officer corps, especially in
those in those periods, they there was a certain aristocracy, there was a
you know, they came from certain bloodlines, There was certain families that became
officers. Those two. Uh, those two came from very simple roots,
and they had an underdog. They had like a I'm gonna fuck I'm gonna
fucking take the world mentality because they were all pissed off at shit that happened
to him. Oh yeah, because they didn't feel respected enough. I think
Napoleon was an officer the whole time. I don't think he was ever but
you're right though, No, he was like lowborn. Yeah, but his
parents saved up and sent him to military academy. I believe, and he
became an officer because he was an artillery officer like from the Jump or Hitler,
though was a corporal. Never never got above corporal, which is like
impossible to do if you're in the military for four years in a war to
only get to corporal. Yeah, we remained neutral, but Jefferson and Monroe
took a more pro France stance, as the British would infringe on maritime rights
far more often and kidnapped way more US sailors, forcing them into the Royal
Navy. I like how you just I like how he said more they just
did it. Yeah. So both sides were doing it, yeah, but
one was doing it too much. The French did it a couple of times,
like all right, not again. Enslave my sailors once, shame on
me. Enslaved my sailors twice. Hold on pal but they only did it
twice. England was like three, four or five now eighteen oh seven.
This is probably Jefferson's biggest mistake under his presidency. He signs the Embargo Act
and forbid any trade with foreign nations in attempt to hurt the British, but
he then came to the realization that he was tanking our own economy and it
was rescinded in eighteen o nine us on his way out that dude, this
that's globalist propaganda. That's what I that's all I'm hearing. This is globalist
propaganda. We don't need to trade with a single other country. Trade is
good. Yeah, yeah, I know. Madison was made way more aggressive
on the British and ultimately declared war in eighteen twelve. Though both now at
war with the British, American French forces never tried to renew their old alliance.
I was gonna say at that point, that's like that's coming back to
an X too many times at that point. Yeah. Also, like and
we never coordinated any military activity together for the war of eighteen twelve for the
best. Yeah, that's like, that's like when you've already you know that
you've already fucked some chick over enough times and you don't even bother having the
conversation again, like she should. She probably hates me at this point.
Yeah, And also like you need to keep that arm's length in terms of
like, hey, like we hate youg but we're not with him because the
British really fucking hated him. Yeah, we were probably just pissing them off.
He was an existential evil threat, so to link up with him.
After they take care of him, they gonna turn around. You don't want
to be Italy to Germany's Germany. You know, you know you don't want
that smoke. Oh yeah too, Yeah, I forget about that. Ye
yeah, yeah, like it's it's good to just do your own thing.
Yeah. So the Monroe Doctrine drops in eighteen twenty three, and France straight
up ignores it as they start messing around in Latin America in Mexico. Yeah,
they're also still fucking with American shifts from time to time. We fast
forward to eighteen thirty one. We call on France to pay their twenty five
million francs to American ship owners for property seizure during the Napoleonic Wars. That's
rich. They refuse rightfully, and when Andrew Jackson was livid about this,
he was prone to anger very easily told the US Navy to gear up and
get ready to roll. Congress thankfully blocks Jackson's reactionary call for war. France
finally agrees to send money in exchange for an apology from Jackson, and he
says, fuck no. All he has to do is apologize to the French
and that they'd agree to reparations too much. It's too much for that man,
Are you kidding me? His pride has basically prevented us from getting a
nice little chunk of change. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know.
He comes a little bit more level headed. A year later, relations are
totally broken off, but in December of eighteen thirty five, Jackson has a
bit of a change of heart, doesn't apologize, but offers up kinder words
to France, toping up back more cordial relations. Are we still trading with
them at least here and there? Okay, it's still tense. Okay,
Now let's go to the American Civil War. Napoleon the Third favors the Confederate
States of America. Of course he does, hoping to weaken a growing power
in the US, protect his investment in the cotton trade, and have a
new ally in the Confederates to strengthen his own second empire in Mexico. So
the French were kind of being hypocrites too about their whole enlightenment, and all
men are free when they're supporting the side that had slaves. The French Revolution
ended with an emperor. Yeah, Like it was a fucking I mean,
like there was some interesting things shouted during it, but like it was dog
shit like through and through as far as I'm concerned, Like, and it
with an emperor and then like no revolution that helps people. It's it's it's
more akin to the Russian Revolution, right, Like it ends, it's supposed
to help people, and then it starts the world war, ends with an
emperor, and then that emperor gets opposed and the monarchy's back, and then
you've got like eight more revolutions and then you get another fucking emperor. They're
a mess. I love them. I do love the French. My aunt
was French. I took French in high school. Jimpobo. But Napoleon the
Third installed Austrian Archduke Maximilian of Habsburg on the Mexican throne in eighteen sixty three
despite a protest. Wow, I didn't know the Halfsburgs were still cleaning on
at that point. Despite a protest and refusal to acknowledge the new government by
Washington, DC, and he supported the Confederates, hoping to allow the French
free reign in Mexico, Yeah, the Confederates weren't gonna bother him. Do
whatever you want. But yeah, Maximilian of Hapsburg just doing this thing in
Austrian that's like the most inbred of all those families. Oh. We did
an episode on the King Charles Spain. Holy moly, dude, that guy
was a mess. Was a miracle, well, you know, in like
the way he was like alive. Yeah, he's essentially just that thing from
Alien Resurrection where they're trying to clone Sigourney Weaving a bunch of oh yeah,
yeah, she's like kill me kill but no. Actually, we're having this
really hot Portuguese princess come over and she's gonna marry you and you get to
have sex. Dude, I can't get it up. They inspected his underwear
mm hmm to see if there was any come in it. The actually that
was an actual thing, but he couldn't He couldn't even get it up right.
He was allegedly like a premature ejaculator. But there was also rumors of
ed. Yeah, so from all the breeding. Yeah yeah, yeah,
yeah, I don't think anything. We could barely speak, yeah, but
I think everything was just weird. It was like a broken cuckoo clock,
you know, like he would just be walking along and be and then you
know, yeah, everything falls apart, like it's not on time, not
when it's supposed to be. Yeah. So by eighteen sixty five, American
troops crowded the Mexican border. France pulls their resources and troops out of fighting
with the Democratic American backed Mexican rebels, and Maximilian was executed by fire and
squad. We actually, uh, sounds like a fitting end for a Frenchman.
We fight. We we brought after the Civil War was over, we
brought French diplomats to DC to watch the Grand Army Parade, the celebratory parade,
and we were like, hey, these are all combat veterans. They
all just fought a much tougher war than we would have with you. So
you can get the fuck out of Mexico, yeah, or we can send
these motherfuckers down there, like we have our war machines humming right, yeah,
like your fucking call. And they were like, oh fuck, all
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I just get back to the show. After the assassination of Abe Lincoln,
which caused an outpour of support from French citizens and the removal of Napoleon
to third. After the Franco Prussian War, relations with our two nations actually
improved. In the eighteen seventies, the French encouraged and activated a student exchange
program with hundreds of US women to practice medicine in Paris, as they were
prohibited from doing so in the United States. Rightfully so, they weren't ready.
Mark Twain described France as a nation with no winter, no summer,
no morals. Apart from that, it's a fine country usually governed by prostitutes,
sick, that's all. And Twain would say, yeah, and Twain,
I'm sure it was rolling through those prosteros. To be honest, are
do you are you going to cover why they gifted us one of the most
iconic structures of eighteen eighty four. France gifts us one of the most iconic
symbols in the United States, the Statue of Liberty. What was was there
any reason? Was it just like was it purely like, hey, we
like you guys, here's this, or was there some sort of what was
this a bi centennial gift? I think okay, oh yeah, And I
think it's just after all these years of or not a centennial gift. Yeah,
yeah, all these years of just a little bit of tension, just
kind of bringing everybody together statue. Yeah, and they have their own.
If you've seen National Treasure too, you would know that they have their own
statue of liberty. Nineteen oh six, Germany and France had a few dust
ups over Morocco. Teddy Roosevelt actually sides with the French here. Oh really
really showing our loyalty, you know, I think you know how like you're
saying, the fucking French were like good, yeah, go confederacy. That
is a big, new powerful country over there, and I don't want them,
like yeah, let's divide that power up, Like fuck that. I
kind of think a lot of people were that way because so Germany unified after
the Franco Prussian War in the eighteen seventies or whatever. I think a lot
of people were like that with Germany too, like oh, bully, that
giant just woke up. Yeah fuck oh man, they're really efficient. What's
funny is people don't realize it was like the best artistic country too. Yeah,
forty year the musicians that were coming out of there, Yeah, it
was no, it wasn't all military. They were a complete culture. Complete.
They were probably the most complete culture in Europe until the end of World
War One. Yeah, we just ripped it to pieces. Speaking of Germany,
World War One, the initial wave of US troops on the Western Front
or World War One brought no heavy equipment to load the ships up with it
as many boys in Blue as they could, and they relied on French tanks,
planes, and artillery. US gave Allied forces the edge they needed,
and Woodrow Wilson was received as a hero during the arrival in Paris in nineteen
nineteen. First president to ever go to Europe. I believe that sounds right.
It is. And actually what I read recently the other day I didn't
realize is that also a huge fucking racist. Yeah? Huge? Wait wait
what was your statement again? Sorry? Woodrow Wilson was the first US president
to go to Europe as president. Okay, I was gonna be like Jeffer
sentiment, not as president like in office. Yeah, they they had all
been to Europe, but in office he was. He was the first sitting
president to travel to Europe. And actually Harry Truman was the first hitting president
to go to Mexico. Wow. Yeah, I know right, that is
fucking wild. I mean they were they had their own issues with stability up
until you know his prey. They were great now yeah, I mean compared
to what years ago? Yeah, it was. Yeah, but what was
I gonna say? Oh, when we first got over there, when the
troops for World War One first got out there, Jack, tell me how
you would feel about this as a veteran of a war veteran specifically, we
got over there and the French and British, but I think more so the
French were like, Okay, here's what's going to happen. That's German.
Sorry, I can't do it. So here's what gonna happen. Thank you
for the troops. They will be under our command, under French general's command.
You're just just gonna take them and use them wherever we went. And
Pershing and the Americans were like, no, absolutely not. You can have
our blacks. That's exactly what happened. Yep. Yeah, would you like
our blacks? They're like, we'll take anybody. Yeah, they actually love
the Black troops. The I mean, that's that's a story with itself,
what those guys did over there. Oh yeah, they were awesome. They're
badasses. But yeah, for the White troops anyway, we were like,
no, we'll be under our own American That's why in World War Two Eisenhower
was very staunch on how things were gonna go down and what America's role was
going to be in And yeah, yeah, I mean he was in Woldar
one. Yeah. The honeymoon after World War One didn't last long. We
clashed over the Treaty of Versailles. France wanted money and resources to help it
recover from the absolute destruction visited upon it during the war, but the US
thought the treaty was just a breeding ground for another conflict down the line,
and we were right, very right. I don't blame sorry, no,
go for it. I don't blame the French for being pissed off at the
Germans. But strategically we in the history of the world, we know you
cannot you cannot punish in other people like that. After the fact, it's
only gonna empower the one hundred times it's gonna make it way worse. Yeah,
you can't make them bitter. You got to kind of just coddle them,
to be honest, like you kill the I mean, not necessarily in
World War One, because I don't think they were really what are you guys
talking about. This is a great place end because surely nothing of importance came
after that disagreement. That was it. Yeah, but I mean it was
it was the war to end all wars. Everyone lived happily and peacefully ever
after, and we didn't have to repay the favor from the beginning of the
episode. And say Francis asked a couple of decades later again, I went
to a museum. While I was out there, somebody explained the second time
around where the failure was. It's not that the French army was weak and
inefficient or inept, it's the but the Germans was just so freaking good.
And then the way that they went into France, they just found one little
hole. Yeah, and they once they punched through it, there there's nothing
you could do. Yeah, I mean you know that like once I mean
in any battle, like if the flank breaks or something like that, someone
gets behind it, it doesn't matter the whole country at that Yeah, because
the French equipment and everything, like they had really good tanks. Yeah,
they had a lot of I don't know how the air force was necessarily the
German Air Force was almost certainly, but their their armor and their army and
stuff like that was like the truly world class shit like, but it just
I mean, even the best fighter can catch get caught, you know what
I mean, Like you can catch anybody. And they did their job.
And when they went to the underground, well, boy did they do their
job around there. Yeah, I mean de Gaulle is kind of a dick.
But other than that. In the nineteen twenties, DC made tensions rise
as they believe France needed to repay some of their war loans. Meanwhile,
we also backed the Germans with the Dollars Plan, where American banks would finance
loans for the Germans to repay the reparations to France, who would then in
turn repay the Americans. Sure. Sure, this genius multi level marketing scheme
obviously collapsed during the Great Depression. Man. Yeah, I think when I
was a kid, like I remember seeing this on the History Channel, like
we were still owed money for World War One. Yeah, the Germans paid
off their debts for World War One. They did. They did it like
in the nineties. That's really I think they're chipping that World War They're chipping
away at World War two, and there they'll they'll have that paid off within
our lifetime. We'll get to it. Really fucking funny. All of our
great writers and jazz musicians of the twenties spent their time in France and had
their work influenced by the lives there. I mean Faulkner, f Scott,
Fitzgerald, Hemenway. Many black artists like Josephine Baker experienced somewhat equality during their
time overseas, as France had no discrimination laws in place. I mean,
just watch Midnight in Paris. You can get a history lesson just off a
couple movies. Really, you're good to go. Interracial marriage was not common,
but it was acceptable at that time. Anti American sentiment began to rise
in the late twenties, with French traditionalists fearing the power of Hollywood and influence
of New York advertising agencies who would threaten tradition customs in their own culture.
It's valid. They weren't wrong, Yes, people do. Americans do not
understand. Our most powerful thing is that our military. It's it's how we
sell our culture. Yeah. Oh, it's even more than the economy.
They're tied hand in hand on an extent. Yeah, but it is like
we are the global culture more yes, because of how because of Hollywood,
and are are the ad monster we have? Yeah, it's it's crazy.
There are no Chinese movies making a billion dollars overseas. There are no English
or French movies doing I mean we're kind of taught, like the English are
basically part of the Hollywood system at this point. Yeah, but like anyone
else, there's no Russian movie do it. There's no movie, there's no
films, and no television shows. There's no Yeah. It's and music even
more so, probably rap and fucking pop, like good rock and roll.
Yeah, rock and roll. And again you can say like, oh,
well the Rolling Stones, the Beatles or what, but that's I don't they
don't exist without a bunch of black guys in the South in the nineteen forties,
right and well, and even still which to stick from the make rock
and roll. Their global popularity doesn't exist if they don't blow up in America.
Yeah, like it all has to come out of America. Nineteen twenty
eight, the two nations co sponsored the Kellogg Bryand Packed, which outlawed war
as an instrument of national policy and called for countries to settle international disputes peacefully.
This obviously worked as their biggest concern. Germany signed the treaty few what
year twenty eight. Well, guess who wasn't a fan of that? Yeah.
When the Nazis started to buck, Roosevelt and the War Department secretly tried
to sell our most modern airplanes and equipment to France, Knowing the Nazis had
a much superior air force against the wishes of our own military factories here still
needed time the ramp up production, and in total only about two hundred planes
were delivered before the French surrendered in nineteen forty. Obviously, two hundred planes
in seven years. Yeah, we get involved because FTR showing to do this
secretly. Yeah yeah, yeah, and that so it's starting in thirty three,
Okay, so starting basically when Hitler, like thirty two, thirty three,
so six seven, the war starts in thirty nine. France is done
in forty Yeah, pretty quick. Yeah, I mean, that's a way
to get out of the pressient. Just start building shit for another country,
sell them your fucking military hardware. We get involved, patting and the boys
in Blue do their thing. On the east side of France, and Eisenhower
and the Ally command agree it should be General le Clerk in the French second
Armored Division who first stepped foot and liberated Paris in August of nineteen forty four,
after Patton continues to push the Nazis out of the country altogether. So
the French are the first people who technically liberate Paris. But I saw over
there that that, you know, that whole thing that people in our populate
ignorantly yelled quite a bit like theyd we speak in German if it wasn't for
us, and they they'll use that in Yeah, any possible way to wear
under monkeys. Yeah, the French are so aware of that. Really.
Yeah. I had a probably a man in his sixties seventies. We were
literally having a conversation with a Google Translate thing on my phone. He flat
out said, like we when he found out is American, he like his
complete demeanor change. He was so kind and polite to me, and and
he said, we'd be speaking German if it wasn't for you, guys.
Come, I'm sure like he's a generational Norman. Yeah, I'm sure his
parents and older siblings have vivid memories of what it was like to live occupied
for four or five years. Yeah, so, but they still they still
feel that over there, that liberation. I've never seen so many American flags
on the side of houses like I did while I was in France. Yeah,
the French, Canadian and British flags. They rocked that shit in all
their houses. That's fucking sick. I actually read something just to your point,
in the eightieth D Day celebrations or whatever. H some French guy who
was a lot I think he was like a kid or or teenager during it.
He was not fighting age. He was talking about how when his town
was liberated, it was like Saint Mark Gleeze or something like that. How
bombs American bombers like drop bombs on it, you know what I mean,
because there were German station there. Yeah, and a couple French civilians were
killed, I think, including like a kid or something that they're like,
do you harbor any you know, resentment for that or whatever, and he
was like He's like, no, it's what needed to be done. It's
unfortunate, but like it was like we had to be freed, right,
and that's so that and that's I one person that the Germans. The Germans
took h The Germans took for France relatively unopposed, right, Yeah, so
they got to go in there and have it. They just you know,
they're in charge. Where us liberating the French people. The Germans were going
to put up a fight. There was going to be collateral damage. Oh
yeah, the whole. Yeah, they really did get most of the country
like pretty easy peasy, because once they broke through that line, they were
in. Yeah, they were they rolled. There wasn't a lot of fighting.
Yeah, I mean, they're violence. But people don't realize we didn't
even get the whole of France. By the time the war ended, they
were still pockets of France that were still German controlled. It took us,
I think it took like almost two months to get the entirety of just Normandy
itself. That's not counting other parts of France. Oh yeah, it was
an Operation Cobra I think or something like that. Yeah, Sureberg where I
was staying, which is about twenty thirty miles from Saint Mary Glee. Yeah,
the the the big Omahan, all those beaches that it took them like
over a month to secure that poor all the hedgerow fighting and shit, yeah,
fucking nightmare. Yeah? Fuck that? Do you when you are when
you stand on those beaches when you I went to Saint Mary Glee as well,
when you're standing there and you're at that church in the center of town,
like it all becomes so real to you, like, yeah, do
they hanging the paratrooper off of it all? I Yeah. All I want
to do when I got on that flight back was watch Banded Brothers because it
made it so much more real once you're there seeing it. Okay, that's
like a huge that and Gettysburger like my two buckets. That's a good one,
man. I didn't know you were rocking on the Gettysburger. Come on,
bro, I grew up watching Gettysburg on TNT every weekend. Oh yeah,
Jeff Daniels fixed banets when he says that nothing gets me harder. Yeah,
Marshall plan putting that on during sex. But yeah, we do it.
Yeah, fixed my bayonet. Marshall Plan was enacted in nineteen forty eight
give people thirteen billion in economic recovery for Western Europe. We also forgave the
French of close to three billion loans from the First World War in nineteen forty
six and expected to uh no payment for close to five billion for the French
under the Marshall Plan, so just kind of here, here's five billion.
I think there's a reason for that, though, and it was because they
knew we were going to make so much god damn money selling them shit because
they had no capacity to create anything at that point. We also become formal
allies again under the North Atlantic Treaty, which set up the NATO Military Alliance.
In the fifties. We run into some issues over the French handling of
colonies in Africa and Southeast Asia. Specifically one we did not support one their
fight against communism in Vietnam. But Eisenhower was like, you know, like
we're not going to get involved right now, but here's some stuff I'll sell
you stuff. Yeah, like I would prefer there not be communism there.
I actually watched a really interesting TikTok the other day from some vet that was
like, we didn't lose Vietnam. That was like his whole point. I
could talk about that later, but it was an interesting thing. He was
like, we had a peace treaty signed, they did not take South Vietnam.
And we left and then they reinvaded a year later. Yeah, Like
we tried to make a peace deal, they walked off the table. So
we dropped more ordnance on North Vietnam than we did in like all of World
War two over the course of like twelve days, brought them back to the
peace table, separated the countries, basically tried to set up a Korea two
point zero. Right, got that done, and we're like, all right,
we're fucking leaving. Yeah, fucking chill. And then North Vietnam like
a year later was like we did okay, and then like went and took
South Vietnam and then they took cambody in. Yeah. The president down there
that we put in charge probably was more morally loose than Ho Chi man.
The guy we put in charge was not a good guy. Yeah, yeah,
sounds about right. Uh. The French, though, they they really
showed their side of the friendship though, because when we started ramping up in
Vietnam, they told us don't don't man, They're no, you can't win.
Yeah. Yeah, fucking nightmare over there. So Egypt, trus and
Nashaw is the sus Canal in nineteen fifty six and the British, French,
and Israel end up attacking. Eisenhower forces them to withdraw and the Birds aligne
with our Middle East policy. But France gets a little bit more distant and
they say, we're an unreliable ally Moody. I mean we we right out
of the gate. We we went back and forth and not paying each other
back and right. It's the type of thing where it's like, when things
get serious, we're totally there for each other. Yeah, you know what
I mean. When things get serious, it's wonderful. But when when things
are kind of like lower stakes, we're just petty little bitches to each other,
like we're just we're just dick holes the whole pot, like any any
little thing, we're just like you know what, man, fuck you and
yeah, fuck you. Yeah, And then like they call like it's what's
breaking into my fucking house? Oh god, And but you're in, You're
in the car immediately getting over there, and like it's happened a couple times
in my lifetime. I mean, I'm sure we're gonna be t are We're
gonna be talking about freedom Fries, right, we talk about freedom fries,
talking about freedom Fries. Yeah, that was the first time in my life
because I was like, I was in the military when all that was happening.
But that was the first time in my life where I realized America's animosity
towards the French could become so vehement. Oh my god. It was like
the dumbest thing. It was the dumbest reason to get if you want to
ever And you're not wrong for being angry or annoyed at like sort of like
woke policing of things or whatever. Can we just get to it, but
yeah, let me naturally get to it, all right, I'm sorry,
man, I we're just excited. Yeah, I'm ruining the groove here and
I'm hungover that is the groove here. France also sought help from the United
States on nukes during the fifties, but Eisenhower's like, no, shot it
down immediately. What they wanted some and he was like fuck off, Yeah,
yeah, he wanted they wanted help from us, and we're like,
we're not going to try to He was trying to de escalate the nuclear thing
anyway, So you're not going to give another power nukes, yeah, which
they figured it out eventually, right. Sometimes you just got to teach a
man of fish kid to give you fish bro. This French era had a
bit of a renewed tension of the US not really supporting one another. When
we do get involved in Vietnam, like you said earlier, they pretty much
warn us like, hey, you can't win that. Yeah, but they
leave us alone. From the seventies to the nineties, France uses the European
Union as a way to counterbalance the power of America and work towards building up
the euro to challenge the US dollar in world trade. Almost works, good
strategy, Yeah, it kind of works for a minute. Reagan tries to
prevent France and the rest of Europe from getting their natural gas from Russia.
They ignore him in the Siberia your pipeline was completed. Probably should have listened
to him. Probably not the best. We kind of make up during the
Golf War when all French troops were ordered to be under American command by the
Assemblee National. That's really funny that we got to Europe in World War One
and they're like the come out and we were like, no, well for
the for the Blacks, but not the rest of them. And then they
get to Gulf War and we're like they're like, here, take them,
pick them all. Nine to eleven happens. French secret Service work with our
own intelligence agencies set up a base in Paris to counter terror operations. However,
France disapproves of our invasion of Iraq in two thousand and three, Americans
get pissed and briefly boycott any and all French products. Like you said,
so fucking dumb you recall the freedom fries are of America. Yeah, do
you guys remember that? No, I used to. We used to call
print, call the restaurant I worked at, and other restaurants, and we
were like we would just like order, you know, like a burger and
fries and like that that burger and French fries and call them freedom from Yeah,
damn it, dude. That's why when't people now and I see people
get angry about, you know, the whole all the bud light stuff.
I don't get into that because I'm like, I never want to be a
freedom fries guy. I never want to become angry about something that's dumb and
not worth being angry about. And the best one of all, my favorite
wasn't even freedom fries, even though that is by far like the funniest,
gayest thing. But like the funniest one to me is that French is mustard
had to come out and be like, French is the last name. Oh
god, we are not from France. Please continue buying our mustard. Dude.
It got so dumb. And you know the thing is that's when America
got back on their military're weak, Their military sucks kind of drain, which
is not true. The French military bangs, dude. Really, they they
to this day they are into some shit. Do you did you ever serve
alongside any me, not like in a combat situation. Yeah, yeah,
but I've interacted with him. Yeah, but they get down in shit.
Ah. So like I like the French are they're at it? Man,
I feel like they have. I've seen that they have like pretty sweet,
like sci fi ass looking rifles. Yeah, Like the French and the Belgians
just have these like fucking spaceship rifles, like they just look crazy. Yeah.
I think the British dude too. I remember seeing the British rifles and
it looked like something out of a movie. That's hilarious. You're just you're
just holding your what even m do you have a M? Sixteen? At
that point sixteen, you're just like, yeah, I know, what is
it now? In four yeah? Yeah, And I kind of left it
there in two thousand and three because you know, our twenty year rule.
Yeah, I mean we are kind of like not much has happened since.
Nah. Nah. They've been great allies in combating terror throughout the world,
that's for sure. Yeah, because they've been to a lot. They fucking
deal with it. Yeah, I mean they people forget the I mean,
I guess if you want to classify this, there's probably way worse ones that
have been in like Africa or some or like some crazy country in the Middle
East or something like that. But like the biggest sort of like western mass
shooting, Charlie, yep, no, no, no, no, it
wasn't that one. It was the one that killed two hundred people in Paris.
That was a different mass shooting. When the heck was that, I
don't know, around the same time. It was within a couple of years
of that. What the heck they killed? It was like three terrorists with
aks killed two hundred people in Paris, just like going around town. I'm
too American to keep track of every shooting. And then there's a There was
a couple other ones too in France that were gnarly, like the trucks.
Remember they were just ram trucks into huge Yeah. What country was the American
Save the Day train? France? France? Yeah, Oh Alex s Carlettis.
I did a scene with him in a movie, a movie. Yeah,
well they made a movie about him. Yeah, they played themselves,
Yeah, which is a very American thing to do. It is what do
you guys learn today? I mean, you know that I like that.
I like France's petty little bitch that it is. I like it. They've
never horribly wronged us. We've never Yeah, we've never horribly wrong them.
The way you open it up was the best possible way to describe that relationship,
being the cousin that helped us out during childhood and is now a little
jealous of our own success. Yeah. Yeah, especially too, because that
cousin was extremely successful in their own right. Yeah, and to the point
where it was like, but had like a drug problem, Yeah, I
had like a drug problem. But even still, the success was so great
that they were to an extent where like, no one's gonna top that to
go to rehabit. Regular friends that they're related to you, if if if
it suit, if it fit suits that. I do believe we owe the
French and apology in general, just for helping us create our nation. Yeah,
that was the biggest that. I mean, that's forever friendship, right.
Yeah. Who's today's Hitler? Hitler? Yeah? Maybe I think we
mentioned my name? Yeah, man, I really is it? Arthur Lee?
Arthur Lee is a dick hole. I really uh Napoleon which one?
Oh yeah, both of them are assholes to be honest, I hate the
French Revolution to at least the reign of terror part of its acidine as fuck.
But I'll just go with Hitler because Hitler. Everything that we shipped on
France for is Hitler's fault. Also, Scholton Monroe, Monroe's dope, he
did so much. Yeah, we'll give him enough crack. Guys, got
to do a Monroe show now, Yeah, we do think that's you.
You're already halfway in, all right, Well, Jack, thanks for joining
us today. Thanks for having me, uh you know me. As soon
as we ye cut, I'm gonna be like, was I good? I'm
sorry, I'm sorry, I'm hungover. You brought it, all right,
you brought it baby, you brought it. I love your hair right now?
Oh thanks man? Yeah, I hyeah, I just don't. Yeah.
I started growing it because for a role that I was in and then
the whole project got canceled. But I just take that. I think you
should just hang out in a park. Oh yeah, the guy that looks
like me, they'd love that. Yeah. See how like, just just
watch Rob's kids. It's just it's not illegal. Yeah, that's why I
keep telling everybody's like, what are you doing here? You have kids here.
I'm like, it's not illegal for the public place. Yeah. The
man on the bench shout to Slice Street Pizza too, by the way,
because they gave us pizza for today. Oh yeah, and I'm it's gonna
be my nourishment for the way home and gip and springs. Baby, check
them out if you're in the area. They gave us some. Yeah,
some real good za. Anyway, that's all I got today. Hopefully you
have a new appreciation of our our French brethren. I always loved him.
My aunt was French. Very least don't talk shit about you and at least
call him French fries. Yeah, they vented French fries too. I mean
it's the kind of mean stake freak. Do you know what they have in
French McDonald's, what they have like tater tots there? Yeah, it's amazing.
I went to three French McDonald's. I want to go to I want
to get fucking drunk in a French McDonald's. Oh yeah, because you can.
That's a good bit by you. I remember when you went to uh
Hawaii, Hanolu. Yeah, you were just like, oh yeah cuisine,
yeah, oh yeah, Shane. You showed an intersection in France and I
was like, is this in Ohio? Oh yeah, Like it was just
a Burger King. I think a McDonald was just nothing but American fast food
chain and it just looked like the shittiest highway off ramp in Ohio, which,
by the way, the French from from there. Their influenced American influence
is pretty low compared to the rest of Europe. They do a pretty good
job keeping their frenchness. Yeah. Funny and like you heard off the top,
we have a Patreon patroon dot slash softcore History yet two additional episodes every
week. There's an entire back catalog of evergreen content of ad Free just you
know, episodes like this game shows a bunch of stuff. We got another
episode coming up this week about Willie Mays. Was he a cheater? Does
he deserve to be in the Hall of Fame? We're gonna piss all over
his grave? Ice? Is he rotting in hell right now? Yeah?
You couldn't even give it forty eight hours. H guys put for his crimes
against baseball. Find out picture on dot com slash Softcore History Jack, thank
you for joining us. Thanks for Jack Mandeville, Rob Fox. I'm Damna
Jester and you just got saw served.