Here is today's Minnesota Goodbye, good morning, good afternoon, good evening,
good middle of the night, happy weekend. Whenever you listen. The great
thing about the Minnesota Goodbye is you can listen in the time, Jenny,
I want to run something by you. Things that are not easy to open
that say they are. For example, I think probably one of the worst
offenders is Kraft Mac and Cheese in the box because it's like it's got the
easy open tab on the side and then you're supposed to push your thumb in
and then pull the top back. I never used that tab. How do
you open up a craft box of mac and cheese. Let's just go through
the top one with that the whole top layer where it's like one on top
of another. Yeah you pull that open and yeah yeah. I mean they
want to have a way for you to open it, but it doesn't work.
I think a lot of cereals you kind of mangle the lid of the
box when you open it. I don't know, but my favorite one is
one right now that I put on my Instagram on a reel is the Lando
Lakes Half and Half, because it is the classic box that says easy to
open and then it says open this tab, put your thumb under here,
lift this ease, and I've done it probably half a dozen times. I
buy that item fairly frequently, and you cannot. You cannot. I would
love to see the engineer who designed this and watch them try to open this
themselves and prove it doesn't work. If you want to see it, it's
on my Instagram, Dave Ryan and katwd I've actually seen that package before.
I'm looking at it right now. But yeah, you don't buy a lot
of coffee creamers then no. I usually do like the whole bottle jug ones
that you can get if I have creamers. So but yeah, it does
look as I'm watching it, it looks like it should be easy to open.
It doesn't open. I mean I've tried it, and I've made a
sincere effort to open this according to the instructions, and you're using logic and
it just it just doesn't. So Land of Lakes love you, love your
product, but whoever designed that box, you need to cancel the contract with
that motherfucker and seriously find somebody else who's bet called down to the U of
M and find an engineering student who can design a better box on the Lando
Lakes half and half? Moving on? You ready to move on? Let's
go all right? Fine? This one is from Laura and does she We
were talking about this a few weeks ago. Is it better to brush your
teeth before you eat breakfast or after you eat breakfast? I brush my teeth
before I eat breakfast. I brush one of the first things in the morning.
But what about you, Jenny Windy brush your te right away when I
get out. But I also don't eat for the first time every day,
at least during the week till like ten am ten thirty. So you and
I don't. We get stuff to do, we don't eat. Jenny gets
her yogurt and then I get whatever's left over from the night before, and
that's when we eat around ten o'clock. So she goes on to say,
this is actual information I learned later in life. And I'm not sure if
that's because the direction has changed or if I wasn't asking the right people.
But Google says it better than I could. Basically, there are two main
reasons why you should brush before you eat versus after breakfast. Number one,
when you sleep, your mouth grows bacteria, and you want to get that
stuff off, so the food doesn't feed it in, the feed in the
bacteria more so, you want to get rid of the bacteria in your mouth,
then eat breakfast. Okay. Also, when you eat sugar acidic stuff
coffee, your enamel is weak and that is the worst time to brush because
then you scratch it up more easily and that damage can be irreversible. Some
they say this applies no matter what food you eat, but the wait time
is shorter or longer based on the food. So basically, thank you,
Laura, brush your teeth before you eat breakfast. Yes, okay, all
right, that's fine. Thank you Laura for doing the research on that one.
The next one is from This is kind of Funny. She is her
name is Ashley, and she writes in not about people leaving dog poop,
but about leaving something else. She says, Dave, I know, I
know that people not cleaning up after their dog is a big, big pet
peeve of yours. So I wanted to get your take on cleaning up after
horses. After a long day at work, I decided, instead of cooking,
I'm gonna stop at q Doba to pick up dinner. As I pull
into the parking lot, I see two horses tied to a tree with two
teens putting their take out into the saddle bags. I thought, well,
that's interesting. They wanted to ride their horses into town, but to each
their own. By the time I was walking out of que Dob but the
horses were gone. But right on the handicap accessible section of the sidewalk a
pile of horseshit. How rude. I've attached picture for proof. I think
it's a sign. You need to design an XXL clip a doo for horses.
All right, says Ashley, there is a picture. I'm gonna click
it and zoom in on it as you live in Montana or something. Well,
that's what I wanted to do. She you know it. It is
in a city, And yeah, there's a pile of horseshit about the size
of a shoe box or so right there, kind of on the sidewalk where
you would roll up the ramp, you know, from the parking lot whatever.
But it is clearly horseshit. Obviously, out in the country you don't
have to clean that up. But if they clean it up in a parade,
you need to clean it up from the street. I don't think they
probably had a method to clean it up. I think that horseshit is different
from dog shit, but at the same time, it's still shit and it
still needs to be cleaned up. So it's interesting that they rode their horses
into the city. Maybe they live on the very edge of town. Jenny,
your thoughts on cleaning up horseshit. I mean I would say, yeah,
you got to clean that up if it's in the middle of the parking
lot and in the middle of a city. I just feel like that's a
proper way to do it. I mean, like, oh right, I
guess I don't know how. You got to be a bit oh my gosh,
bring them pigle the like, I don't know, grocery store bag instead
of here a little pool bags. You would think so, but I mean,
like like a shovel. I mean, if if you've got a horse,
you do have the same responsibility. If you're riding into the city and
you're gonna leave it on a sidewalk, yeah, then you got to bring
a little bag, just like a dog poop bag with a little shovel and
scrape it up. I'm gonna bet that somebody right now who rides a horse
owns horses would have an answer for us. Most of the time you do
not see a horse outside of ke Dooba and so it doesn't happen very often.
But if you own horses or ride horses, let us know, do
you carry a poop bag and a little scooper inside your saddle bags? Next
one, Dave and Jenny responding to a couple of topics that came up over
the last couple of weeks. Let's see what we've got. I think it
was last week Dave mentioned the show American Pickers and he heard it was staged.
Well, American Pickers came to our tiny Wisconsin town last summer and visited
the railroad roads museum we have here. The owner said it took three years
to get the show to come. I don't believe any part of it was
staged from what I've heard from the owners. The episode came out a few
weeks ago, and I believe you can stream it on Hulu. Also,
my kids and I got to meet Mike from American Pickers and he was so
nice. It was a very cool experience for our small town. Also,
Jenny, this is for you the situation where your mom would not let you
get a dog. I've come to side with Jenny's mom here. I'm a
working mom with three young kids, and we have dogs from before we had
kids. Sadly, my time and energy and patience is all taken up by
my kids, and the dogs just add to the exhaustion when you think about
all the things parents already have to juggle. Adding in extra duties like duties
like cleaning up dog hair, buying pet food every month, cleaning up dog
poop and vomit, and remembering pet vet visits, It's just so hard.
My oldest child can now let the dogs outside and give them water, but
the rest still falls on me and my spouse. So I sympathize with your
mom, Jenny. And when our current pups pass away, we won't be
getting another one either. I'm glad she's enjoying being a dog grandma now,
though I've been told by me many people that being a grandparent in general is
often more enjoyable than being the actual parent, due to less responsibility and more
room to just have fun. Have a great weekend from Allie. Any response
Jenny, Yeah, I mean I see where she's coming from, for sure,
but that doesn't mean I wasn't still sad every Christmas morning thinking that there
was gonna be a puppy under the tree, and I was like excited,
like maybe this will be the year, even though I knew it never would
be. But I mean, I of course I get where she's coming from.
Yes, we were three young kids. We're all I think the age
range is like six years between the three of us, so we weren't like
too far apart in age, and so I get it it would have been
even more responsibility. But I really think that my mom just like didn't think
she was a dog person back then, more so than it was the responsibility
factor. She just like always said she didn't really like dogs that much,
and now she loves them. So I feel like something changed a little bit
in her. But I'm sure it had to do with the responsibility aspect as
well. Oh no, absolutely, because you know, let's face it,
you buy a kid a dog, and who is going to do the majority
of you know, taken into that, the kid will say i'm gonna help,
I'm gonna help, but a lot of the time they don't help,
and they're busy doing homework or something. So mom or dad is like,
oh, Okay, fine, I'll clean up the dog poop. It's like
buying a kid a hamster. I just think I was talking to yesterday on
the show about Alison wanted a hamster or a gerbil or a white rat or
something when she was a kid, and I said no because I knew I'd
do be the one taking care of it. I wish I had gotten it
for because she never had a little pet like that. She had a cat,
and we had Josie, and we had Rex and Gracie, but she
never had her own little pet. Huh. We did have a hamsters,
and I've told the story before and it was a nightmare because we got to
it was a male and a female. They started pro creating. Yeah,
eventually we had like fifty hamsters and we had to take them to the pet
store because the parents wouldn't even let us like get into the what it's it
called, not turanium? What do they stay in? Just like a cage.
They wouldn't let us in there to do anything because the parents were like
protecting the kids, they and all that stuff. So gotcha, Wow,
So you had to give all your hamsters? Yeah, every one of them.
Yeah, we gave them all away to the pet store. They like.
Oh, and then they made a profit off of them, so good
for them. But yeah, good, you know what they found the little
hamster homes. Yeah, I had white mice when I was a kid,
and my dad built a big custom cage and it had a wheel in it.
That the wheel, he built a little device. My dad was so
brilliant that way. He built a little device out of an old analog gas
meter that would show how many times and how many miles the mouse ran in
this wheel. Wow, that's intense. I mean seriously, the wheel was
attached to this old gas meter, and he figured out how many revolutions made
a mile. And it was like I never figured out because you had to
do a computation on you know whatever. But this fucking mice, they would
run in the wheel all night because they're more nocturnal. So here's this mouse
in my bedroom while I'm trying to sleep. Oh, just having a good
old time running in that fucking wheel. Jenny, and I remember I'd wake
up and I'd pound on the cage and he would stop for a couple of
minutes. And I think finally I disabled the wheel by taking one of the
axles and pulling it out of its little hole and laying it down because yeah,
you're like, I need to sleep. Was your dad upset that you
messed with his contraption? You know, I don't. I don't think so.
I don't think so. I think there was a part of my dad
that gave up on me in a lot of way, not gave up on
me. Yeah, my dad was a great dad, and I think was
thinking yesterday he had so much to do with my work ethic. But I
think my dad was just so frustrated with trying to control me from being a
little asshole that I think he gave up on trying to control all of my
little asshole moves. You know, It's like you pick your battles, dad,
so he picked the battles whatever. But yeah, we were talking yesterday
about work ethic, and you and I both know certain people that did not
have a work ethic. And then you and I, Jenny, we have
a very strong work ethic. And I think you know, Jenny had a
paper route when she was like eight years old. I grew up on a
chicken farm. There was always always work to do, and so when I
got into radio, I was used to working hard, but this was fun
work. So you and I never had a work ethic problem. But you
and I have known some people that really they didn't like to work. Yeah,
they definitely didn't. We could not get work out of them. So,
yeah, one of my very best friends from home, she just like
didn't have a work ethic at all. She went to so many different colleges
trying to find the right thing, and school work wasn't her thing, and
then she like tried to get jobs and then like jobs weren't working out.
So now she kind of works like lots of just like little part time jobs
and it works for her now. But like she was really trying to like
fit this mold of society and it just didn't work for her. And she
finally was like, you know what, I'm going to be a server part
time and I'm going to do this part time and that's like how it works
for me. And she figured it out eventually. But yeah, I was
a struggle for her for a while. And you think a lot of it
just had to do with a lack of work ethic and maybe she didn't have
to work when she was a kid. Yeah, she'd I'm trying to remember,
Yeah, she didn't have to work as a kid, but I yeah,
she didn't have the work ethic at all. That's so funny. I
mean I totally get that. You know, Allison's got a very strong work
ethic that was self imposed, and she would come home, have a snack
and do her homework until it was done. Carson was a little lax and
he would forget to turn into assignments and he was in charge of boy scout,
you know, different things, and he was the senior patrol leader and
he just didn't really work that hard. And I really worried about Carson,
Like, you know, when you get into the real world, you got
to get up on time, and you got to do what your boss says
now. And if you can't do it now, you've got to tell your
boss I can't do it now, but I'll do it at three o'clock or
whatever. But he is shaped up. He works so hard, I think
because he realizes that if he wants to have the life that he once in
the music industry, he's got to be a hard worker. So yeah,
next one from Hannah on Minnesota. Goodbye. Hey guys, do you know
if flight attendants can help carry bags? Me? And my five year old
were on our way back from Oregon for my brother's wedding. I had two
bags and he had two bags that he was a champ at carrying through the
airport way there flawless. On the way back, we got one flight just
about to board our connecting flight home, but they canceled it because that plane
had been struck by lightning. Our only flight home was two more flights,
one at nine thirty PM to Vegas and then one from Vegas to Minnesota at
twelve thirty or so in the morning. My son slept the whole time on
the flight and in the airport waiting to get on our red high. He
was sleeping when we were boarding, so I was trying to carry him and
our four bags by myself. The flight attendants just looked at me and smiled
while I struggled, and no one offered to help. My husband said later,
like you would have let somebody else carry our kid. No, I
would have hand handed my child to a rando. Oh. No, I
would not have handed my child to a rando. Just wondering if that's the
standard that they can't help. I had to wake my son and make him
walk groggly wait to our seat anyway, I basically never want to fly again.
But my son thought it was the coolest thing to sleep all night on
an airplane. Laugh Emoji memories were made and Mama was traumatized. Hannah,
I don't think that they are allowed to help, don't you think, Jenny.
I kind of think that too. I've seen them like adjust things every
once in a while when someone else is like struggling a ton, but never
like help pick up. And I do think that that's just like not part
of their job. I think it's part of an insurance regulation, like if
you hurt yourself lifting a passenger's bag, we do not compensate you for that.
We don't cover that. So I think that they are told you cannot
help, because remember about three or four months ago, I injured my arm
trying to climb the rope, remember that, yep, And I injured my
right arm so badly I couldn't even lift it up to brush my teeth,
and so I couldn't lift my suitcase into the overhead bin. And I said
can you help me with this to one of the flight attendants, and they
said, no, I really can't help you. But I can help adjust
it. And I'm like, oh shit, So they did not, and
I get it. It's like they are told not to. What about all
the other people on the plane, Like she said, nobody offered a help.
Oh my god. I would have been offering to help immediately if I
saw someone in that situation. And that's what I thought too, unless people
were just like, well, it looks like somebody needs to help her,
but nobody stepped in. One of my favorite stories at the airport was a
woman who was struggling with like a stroller and a baby in a suitcase and
a carry on and she was going through TSA and she had her hands full,
literally had her hands full, and she's like, oh, she's looking
around like what do I do? And she said, will you hold my
baby for a minute? And I'm like, you bet, and I said,
you know. And she was a young black woman, and I'm glad
that she looked at an older white guy as somebody to help her out.
Yeah, you know, I just thought that was very, very sweet,
and I'm glad that she recognized me as somebody who was helpful. And I
said, I got four kids on my own, I'm great with babies and
the baby just looked at me and just like total is just like, you
know, totally chill. And I was so happy to be able to help
her out, but she needed help. What she gonna do Put the baby
down on the conveyor belt, slide the baby through the X ray machine and
get it to a TSA agent who they also probably cannot help with stuff like
that. But see, you and I would have, like, I mean,
you know, because we're perfect and we're wonderful, exactly, you and
I would have said, let me help you carry something, let me give
me that baby, yep. And they would have probably said, how about
you take the little suitcase instead and not the baby? So I think I
think your aunt sat Hannah is no, they can't. How are we doing
for time? Jenny? Uh? We got we got some time still?
Okay? Good, Let's go to Rinita, a regular staff writer. Rinita
says, heard y'all talking about underwear versus panties, But where do you fall
on knickers? I use that word instead, and I like to use other
old fashioned words like stellar, dapper, ufta, et cetera. I don't
use nickers because I just don't use I use underpants because panties is a gross
word. Underwear just I think underpants is funny. So I'll be like,
yeah, you know, Jenny left her underpants on the nightstand at the hotel
and Andrew found, you know, something like that, So why are you
out in my hotel room? None of your business. I miss parodies.
When can we get some more. One of the things I've always loved about
radio was the parodies the DJs would put together. In fact, I have
an old school CD of the K one O two morning shows parodies from where
Forever Ago, and I still laugh when I listened to the songs. We
used to do a ton of parodies on the show. And I'm going to
tell you the truth about a parody that I almost wrote last summer and or
last fall about Jenny, and we never and I wrote the words out out
and I never recorded it. I was like, going to record it,
but Diego, the guy who assists sometimes in recording stuff, he wasn't available
at that moment, and then the next day I wasn't available, and then
the moment passed. It was to you a little boo Thing, and it
was a song about Jenny called you a little poo thing, and it was
all about how Jenny has to shit all the time because Jenny has bowel problems.
And right now Jenny is probably you know, like clenching or butt cheeks
squirming in my chair because I even go to the bathroom. Yeah. Yeah,
So so I wrote the song You'm a Little Pooh Thing, and we
never recorded it. And but the biggest parody we ever did, I think
was the Hollister song. Really, no question was a Hollister song. And
I missed doing those. But I guess I don't know. I just have
not been inspired to write a parody song. You know what, Nita,
maybe I'll work on one. As I say, I think the last one
I did was Late Night's uh Snacking instead of Late Night Talking by Harry Style,
since I'm a little late night midnight snacker. I think that's the last
one. And that was probably a year and a half ago, yeah,
almost two years ago actually, And then you also did the cheese song,
right, Oh, yeah, I did the cheese song. I did a
really inappropriate song to Wham's Last Christmas that can't be played on the air.
Are the lyrics, Jenny. It was basically I don't remember, but it
was basically that I was swiping on Tinder and that we banged one Christmas and
then the next day he was gone and we haven't and so that was my
last Christmas. That sounds lovely, Yeah, it's like as a beautiful Christmas
song. Going back to couples arguing about the show, because we said,
you know, people will argue about whether they like Taylor Swift. Like somebody
will go, you like Taylor Swift? Yes, I like Taylor Swift.
Do you not It's like, no, I think she's overrated. Oh my
god, Well we can't be friends. So that type of thing. So
we said, to people argue about our show, my husband and I are
that couple. He says, the show panders and he hates it. Okay,
I'm not sure what that means, but I will say that we do
focus on a certain demographic and it's usually, you know, truth be told.
We get a lot of men that listen to the show, and I
love that, but the audience we target our show too is usually women that
are about thirty four years old. That's our bulls eye. That's our bulls
eye. If we hit the bulls eye, that's what we aim for.
But it's a shotgun approach. Just because we're hitting the bullseye of a thirty
four year old woman, We'll get a lot of forty two year old women
and a lot of eighteen year old women, and a lot of twenty five
year old men and a lot of fifty four year old men. Because I
think there's something on our show for everybody, and I am not a thirty
four year old woman. Jenny is almost right smack dab in the middle of
that bulls eye, So I think we're really good at and Vont's way out
of that bulls eye. So I think we do a good job of hitting
a lot of people. So I don't know what they mean by pander,
but you know, okay, he criticizes the ummms, which we probably do
a lot of what you come and try to do radio and not say aman
like every once in a while. Yeah, it does happen. I'm not
saying. I mean, I know we all do it, and it's like
something we all have to work on constantly. But yeah, I love the
show, and I tell him he can suck it. Love y'all from Rinita.
Thank you Rinita for sticking up for the show. Next one, this
is Nick. He says, short email in response to the holiday email.
Our school is a small public school and the Rocks and Cows part in the
Rocks and Cows part of Minnesota. Our school does religious release where one day
a week for an hour and a half, if the kids are signed up,
they leave the school to either go to the Lutheran church or bust to
the Catholic church and have religious studies. If not signed up, the kids
get an extra study hall and the regular classes are reduced in link for that
day. They do it every week, but it's a small school with an
average grade size of thirty kids per grade. Just thought i'd share. I
like that, you know, I there will be people who would just scream
and yell if that was happening here in Minneapolis. But you know, in
an outlying air are you somewhere up north, let's say, I don't know,
Cloquet or something like that. I feel like people wouldn't really screaming yell
about that. That's very like inclusive without having to be like forcing it upon
everyone. Like everyone gets to leave and go do their own thing, or
you just stay. You know, like I would be surprised if people found
that to be like offensive, you know, what's funny is you're probably right,
but people look, I mean, it's such a cliche to say this.
People want to be offended. There are these righteous do gooders that expect
they think the world should be a perfect, non offensive place. I was
watching a very short video on Instagram and somebody said they were at a college
campus and they did not like the speaker being there, and they said,
I am offended. I am personally, I feel victimized that you are here
speaking on my campus. And the woman speaking said, then put on a
helmet and gross and balls or something like that, because because I don't have
time for this, I'm too pregnant. And I thought it was funny because
I think that some people are actually taught to believe they should never be offended,
like they have a right to not be offended. For example, let's
say that I'm walking downtown and there's a band plane and they're playing I don't
know, I can hear like a sidewalk bar, and they're playing TikTok by
Kesha, and I let's say I don't but let's say I hate TikTok and
I hate Kesha. God damn it, I'm gonna go into that bar and
I'm gonna complain to that manager. I do not want to hear Kesha.
Her lyrics are disgusting and she's a disgusting human. Tough shit, bro,
you've I mean, seriously, there are people think that they should not be
offended. Good luck going through life not being offended. Yeah, I was
gonna say, I just you just got to move on with things, and
that's like not living if you're offended by everything. I think that, yeah,
and that's part of life, is like, you know, it's funny
because once in a while people will get mad at us because we didn't give
a trigger warning. And I still I totally get trigger warnings. I had
something very traumatic happened in my life a few years ago, and if anybody
brings up a similar situation, it kind of makes me shudder a little bit.
But I would never say and I kind of avoid that topic, but
I would never get mad at anybody for bringing it up because they didn't mean.
At the same time, if I'm going to talk about like sexual assault
or something like that, you know, probably a trigger warning is appropriate.
But if I'm going to talk about a tornado, yeah there's a tornado warning.
I guess there was a tornado in Missouri this weekend, and somebody's like,
oh, you should have given me a trigger warning, because you know,
a tornado scare me really bad. Because I remember there was a tornado
in my neighborhood and it did, you know, like blew apart my neighbor's
house or something like that. I need a trigger warning. I can only
say to you, grow up and put on a helmet, because am I
gonna get Should I be aware of every trigger warning? You know? I
think it's really hard to be aware. I don't think that like you would
ever talk about something obviously in a way that's like malicious to like hurt someone
and like bring back awful traumatic memories. But it's hard to be aware of
what could be the potential of bringing back a traumatic situation for someone like I
would have never have said trigger warning before talking about it a tornado. But
I'm sure there are people who might hear the word tornado and it does like
trigger some kind of anxiety because they were in a tornaico blame, then who's
to blame? Are you to blame for not being sensitive enough to maybe think
that a tornado could trigger somebody? Or are they to blame for bringing it
up. I understand they're upset, Sure they are traumatized and whatever by the
tornado, but they are they and the wrong to bring it up to embarrass
you or should they just say, you know what, that sucks, I
don't want to talk about a tornado, but not go you know what?
You need to give me a trigger warning, because we get that once in
a while. Yeah, if I say something like coffee, somebody will be
like, I got scalded by coffee when I was a baby, and I
cannot talk about coffee without remembering that horrible event when I got scalded when I
was a baby, So please give a trigger warning before you bring up coffee.
And I'll be like, are you serious? And we don't get that
often because I think that people that people do that they're literally looking for something
to be a victim for. Yeah, I would say that the person is
probably that's complaining about you bringing up coffee. They're a little bit in the
wrong. They could maybe approach it in a different way, obviously, like
on the radio. It's a little different if it was like a conversation with
a friend in person and they were like, hey, you know, can
you just like maybe not talk about this. That's like a different situation where
I think that they're in the right to like maybe bring that up. But
on the radio, it's like, we can't be aware of every single thing
that might set someone off. We're aware of obvious things like what you brought
up earlier, sexual assault. Obviously we're aware of stuff like that. But
you know, Jenny and I and Vought, we're talking about this in the
year. We got to wrap up Hyaht's wrap up. Then we'll continue.
We'll continue on Monday on the Minnesota Goodbye. Send your emails in to Ryan's
show at a d w B dot com. Love to hear from you,
and we'll see you next week.