Man, Thank y'all. Just just thank y'all for being supportive. Fake Love
premieres next week, that is April twenty five. I had to push it
back because I got kids and a wife that I got to tend to and
I can't just be a studio rap because they they think I don't love them.
That's how people lose their family. This is another convo behind the pie
with my best friend Brinny Taylor. I have to say that because if I
don't, she's gonna shoot me. And I am scared of her. But
enjoyed this episode, and uh, I'm gonna drop another one of these with
her, and then next week it's the first episode. Enjoy Yeah, you
don't have to meet about data. Why are you going dates? Where do
you like to go? The gun range of course? For dates? What's
the best first date? What's the best date you've ever been on? You
gotta talk directly into the mic, and you gotta breathe into it too.
I'm trying m even't breathe like that. Yeah, sure, that's fine.
The best day. I don't know, I don't know, I really don't
So I'll be going on some nice dates. Did they be scared of you?
Are you really soft? Do who be scared of me? The guys?
Oh? Girls? Why I don't go on dates with girls? Um?
Dan, it's crazy what I'm going to day with girls? Yeah?
Why you mean go on dace with girls? Well, they've eaten your vagina
before? You didn't go on a date with them? No? Oh nice?
Sound like a nigga eat No? Yeah? Um? Why would they
be scared of me? I don't know. I'm just asking. I'm a
nice person, you are, That's why I asked if you are you soft
with on the first day? Like? When do you when do you like?
When do you first start getting abusive with your man? As soon as
they pull up? I put up the motherfucker door. You wouldn't like this,
You wouldn't like this before. You were so sweet when I met you.
I never thought you When do you first punching a nick in his mouth?
Have you ever punched nig in his mouth? I have? I have
you laughing? Are you laughing? There's some truth in today? I never
I'm being honest. I have I never what what you never would? I've
never? Um, I've never been the aggressor. I've always been the defender.
Right you know what. The more and more I talked to my my
homegirls, the more I'm realizing that more of them have been in situations to
where they might have been in some domestic stuff. Yeah, as a nigga
who is terrified of hitting a woman, I am terrified of putting my hands
on a woman. You should be not because of what she can do.
No, not not, not even because of whatever people on her phone are
crazy. Yeah, Jesus, But sometimes what do the old folks be saying,
like fat meat ain't gry. Whatever they be saying, sometimes you gotta
let them know who knows. You gotta remind niggas because it's some niggas that
be thinking it's sweet out here and it ain't. No, I'm terrified,
but um and I ain't gonna say it like it's fun or it's funny.
Let me not joke about it, because it's really not funny. It's really
niggas I hear that really think shit sweet. Yes, but um, I
won't say like I've had some really good relationships. I've only had a few
right that have tested the waters and found out the hardway. But majority of
the guys that I do date m they know that that whist alone you not
even just they whistle. Are you do her? They know, like,
majority of them know my background. They know, they know my brothers.
They know that. They know now they didn't know before. No, majority,
majority of the ones I date they know. I've had some that want
to test the water and when they test the water drowned. They found out
they can't really swim. So and that's cool, you know, it's very
I remember going to the hookah bar and seeing my homegirl with glasses on,
and my dad mans just like, bitch, why are you in this motherfucker
with these Mary J blinde glasses on? And she was like shut up And
I was like, nah, I have I didn't see I haven't seen her
in a while, so I was excited to see her. But I was
like, why are you on some Hollywood ship with these classes on? And
she lived she lift at her, but I said, oh my god,
did I just felt really bad, like Dann, I felt really really bad
because in my mind, you know, yeah, I don't really be I
don't really be knowing my my homegirls like that, meaning like we ain't never
fucked, so I don't know that side. Once once once something happens once
the key going to the whole the vagina, the penis goes into the vagina.
You know, you know about the birds and the bees. Something happens?
Did they always talk about the birds and the bees? Where they never
talk about like the stinging? Like why they called the beat Because something happens
and the changes the dichotomy of the relationship. Really, yeah, and well,
I wonder what happens. I don't know, maybe orgasm releases the truth
serum never had one of those. Just where that come from. I don't
know what the fuck that is, but I'm having to listen, um,
but yeah, something Sorry, guys, something happens, um listeners. I
know y'all because mostly y'all, most of y'all are black women. Something happens
when a guy fucks you or you fuck a guy, and the attitude changes,
like the response like now I'm getting a different response when I take long
the text. Now I'm getting a different like you're my actions are getting different.
So you gotta show the motherfucker who you are up front. I try
to be. I try to be. I tell you up front, don't
play women before we even make it anywhere. Don't play with me I try
to be this dry asshole version of myself. I try to be an over
I try to be an overexaggerated version of myself. The problem is niggas.
Niggas in general, y'all work to get the coochie. Yes, and then
once you dumb get the coochie, y'all forget about the work y'all had to
put in to get it. So then y'all start slacking off. So then
that bitch just like a excuse me, nigga? If I text you at
ten o'clock, why the fuck is it? Father was like an I ain't
herphone you, I was fucking somebody else. Don't switch up, though,
because before I get you the coochie, I would text you at nine thirty,
and you was texting me back right at nine thirty. It wouldn't even
be nine thirty one. He was on my line calling. So don't switch
up. Be the same you. That's that's the don't. And then y'all,
oh, she's crazy, You give her the she gets to acting like
y'all go to get No, just keep the same entergy that you came with
when you when you first approached me. Don't all of a sudden start to
lag off. And then when I start lagging off, it's a problem my
wife. We got the CV turned up to fifty. Jesus Christ, I'm
talking like, what's that now she's talking about? N't know? You know
you at what I'm telling about. You know, that's when you are when
you are married, your spouse can be very uh petty because and I'm guilty
of it too, because I can't. I don't you know you're being petty,
so I'm not. I can't really say nothing because I know you're doing
it on purpose. Or now I have to retaliate TV. She can just
turn that shit down. Maybe she like me, we're hard to hear.
I need the TV up so I can hear what they're saying. Man,
this is why I hit Teena in that ear. I had to fix your
shit like a TV hit the side of that mother and that's why Teena hadn't
knocked them and get some sense of twhim. Yeah that's you shot that nigga.
Baby, It takes you one time. I really wouldn't. I really
would like your mama made a hole. I would I would like to see
that movie made again. But from her perspective, like I want her to
do diary entries like this nigga hit me today and blah. I want to
know say it was from her perspective. I want to know what she was
feeling. I don't want to see it. I want to hear her internal
thoughts about what she was thinking about that. Because has she never done interviews
about the abuse? I don't know that she always smiling when she interviewing.
She always it's happy, nigga got your name and you and your money and
you not here. I'm still stop, that's some crazy you mean? Yeah?
When when should I tell you if we're dating that my ex is crazy?
If we're dating, yeah, yeah, so say like we go out,
say say I got a crazy ex and she's currently like stalk and my
ship, my socials. She's on my phone using different apps. She texted
me from different numbers, this is and that and that. But I'm trying
to move on. I need to know up front, right, I like
what, like how like, hey my name is Eric, I have a
crazy X. Hey y'all, we'll be right back after these commercials like hey
my name is Eric, I have a crazy X. If we are if
we're talking, and you about to want to date. If you know that
you want to date me, take me on dates. So we're about to
be hanging out. I need to know this up front. Let me get
let me tell you. So. I'm talking to a dude and this is
uh, he's pretty no. Okay, Um, i'll tell you his name
after we get but he's pretty No. We're talking and we're going on dates,
movies, out to eat, walks. We're going on some real nice
dates. He's a nice ass guy. Right, Um, you gotta be
the walk you hear me, We're going on walk man. So um.
I finally he had been asked me to come over for a while. I
finally come over and we're chilling. We're listening to music like we really on
some chill type shit. Chier, let's settle down, that's what I want
to do. But no, for real me, I'm joeping. Why the
voice change here? Yeah? I was going out walking and stuff. Yeah,
really you feel me? We were enjoying each other's company. Girl.
He was a nice low vibe and I really I should have known better because
he's an a quarious That was the red flag, baby. I didn't panted
to the red flag. But so we're chilling one night, We're listening to
music like relaxing, and all of a sudden, I see a flash the
window. I'm like, I see a flash through the window. I'm like,
come all right. So he's like, hold on, hold on on
what I'm like what So then I'm gonna stop banging on the door. So
I'm sitting him like what the fuck is going? What's happening? On?
What was happening? The nigga had a crazy ax, and it's late,
it's late, and you she put up, and so my thing is this.
I know she was texting him this entire time exactly and looked his phone
his phone kept he kept looking at his phone and shit, but ignoring it.
And I'm like, you from if you got what you gotta do,
that's cool, I can go home him. No, no, no,
no, cools cool, it's just my probs, all right. Whatever.
So the flash through the window, then the banging on the door, it's
crazy. Then get the banging on the door. Then she stops. Then
she starts begging again, and she stops for about ten fifteen minutes, and
I'm just like, so I finally tell him. At this point, I'm
on the phone with my buddy, and I'm like, hey, I'm gonna
sucking pulled up at this ship. I was some bullshit and you know I
got that on me. What are we doing? So my buddies on her
way and he's I'm like, you can go outside and you can handle it
or I handle it. But if I handle it, yeah, yeah,
the Fox five, Fox fifty nine is gonna be out here. Listen.
So he goes outside and he talks to her day whatever, arguing back and
forth. He comes back in and he's like, I'm so sorry. I'm
so sorry. I'm like naschool, like you feel me. You just ain't
the nigga for me, Like, ain't nothing l to talk about. Don't
leave none of the leaf because I'm gonna catch the case play with you,
and this ain't for me and it ain't for you. So I was like,
when you get rid of that situation for real, Well, I can't
spend the block, But don't really spend the block because I'm not giving second
chance. Yeah, because you already in line. Yeah you could we could
have. We could have talked about this exactly. But that's what I'm saying.
You tell you say this up front. This is this is what I
say when I say your date. If you're dating and you know you want
to date. If you guys are just like texting and shit, you ain't
ever chilled or none of that, that's your business, right. But once
you are taking me out in public and you're wanting to hang with me and
wanted me to come over your house, you nip that ship in the bud
because bitches are returned and that could have went totally left. She could have
got on ship with me. I could have got on ship. Thank god.
I'm like, if I go ahead and she sucked my car up,
I'm about to set this home, my fucking block off. Thankfully Stallion was
out there, untouched, chiller, relaxed, mind in her business. You
just never know, man, it's so dangerous. And I said, I'm
not from the background where you feel me. I talk. I'm not talking
nothing out. If she get on some shit, I don't know you to
talk it out. I'm getting on some real retarded ship. So we might
as well. Just you feel me. But you should have told me that
this is walk outside. And I was like, I've been praying for a
night like this. Motherfucker starts slapping their stuff on the face. Listen slapping
their quads. This is crazy. The chick owned. Don't I told you
a little crazy? This? You ain't gonna know this girl. My sister's
friends. I felt my sister's friend was head over heels for me. Back
in the day, who don't you hate? I hate my man? Well,
I realized that I don't like anybody being hit over heels for me.
No, I got somebody right now. I don't want him to leave me
out. Yeah, she was. She was the worst, and I wanted
to tell her, like, man, you dive in too. There says,
no diving on the edge. You just keep diving. So I've check.
I'm checking in on her. It's been years, I'm married with kids.
I don't know what recently she followed the black widow page. So I'm
like, oh shit, hey, what's going on. How you being blah
blah blah blah. So she like, yeah, I got a question I
need to ask you. And I was like, she said, you always
give me the best advice. I should have known us some bullshit coming.
She said, what she said, what should I do? I'm dating this
guy. I like him, he likes me. Yeah, but they now
they now are associates because for reasons I can't say, because she might listen
to this. She retarded. Okay, yeah, she's just a bad bomb.
Stop being retard as ahead. But she said she was laying with this
nigga and she heard the banging, so she thought it was cute. She
was like, ah, did his ex? Won't his ex want him?
I got him now, she said. She said to stop, said she
was able to go back to sleep. Mind has always been is always crazy,
not med that I was loading the clip and there in there already.
Let me load this one too, because we don't know what's the missing turn
of john Wick. That's crazy. She said that she went back to sleep,
and then she heard the window open and that bitch was creepy crawling through
the window in the kitchen shut the all type of pots and pants falling through
the thing. I said, I said, what did you do? She
said, well, I didn't know what to do because I was scared at
that point. And I was like, so what happened? And she was
like, well, he got up and went in in the living room and
I said, so he was under the covers, like the girl from What's
the What's What's What's the girl from Players Club when they she was in the
bathroom scared Eby. She was she was definitely pulling the ebony and I was
just like, all y'all still y'all still sucking around and she was like yeah,
because that was just one time thing. I was like, bro,
you are probably take this one time, I said, breed. I said
what her name is, Brittany. I was like, you can't, you
can't be doing this. She ended up blocking me and deleting me. I
thought that was really Britney says, if you are listening Brittany to Brittany,
maybe I think you've been let it go. Yeah, but you sys.
I hate I also hate too that women have this biological clock that allows them
to, Yeah, that that that forces them to deal with bullshit for so
long because they don't want to start over. And I really do hate that
because niggas do not have that. I don't know what our problem and I
say ours because I'm currently going through it, and um, I don't understand
what it is with us, why we feel like we have to hold on,
like, well, you know black women. Black women are so supportive
that they hold on too long. Yeah, I feel like they'd be trying
to see the good. And we need to understand that that nigga ain't he
ain't got no good you know, it's just that simple white some of the
fuckers. I get it. But now when this nigga's going upside your head,
there's no good thing in him. Nothing's good. Oh but he's a
good dad. But her as my aunt, used to get her ass beat
by by my stepuncle right when we was little. I've never personally seen it,
but her, my great aunt, her sisters and everybody had seen it.
And my aunt, my aunt, not my great aunt. With my
aunt, like my sacond mom. She had a birthday party she turned fifty,
and I saw that nigga. That nigga looked like trauma. Cocaine and
malt liquor deteriorated this nigga's body from the outside end. Nigga was walking like
and and I and and because I'm I'm so, I overanalyzed everything. I
was like, man, what was making him be like this? And now
he he was? It was misplaced aggression. Was that he was hitting my
great aunt. That's how it is what most nigga's out yeagression and either they
were getting they asked us as kids or molested or molested, or is a
matter of their having struggles at work and taking it out on their woman or
just struggles in life period. He's taking that out in your woman, and
nigga, that's not my fault. I'm sorry, it's not I'm not gonna
it ain't my fault. No, nigga's it's not my fault that your manager,
Steve Yeah, belittle on you and you feel too small to say,
nigga, whooped Steve asked away. You're trying to whoop my ass every motherfucking
that. I was just looking at that nigga, like we should just jump
on your ass, right not for real, for real, for real,
Like I remember being young. I don't know how we're talking about domestic domestic
abuse, but my grandmother, my grandfather used to put his hands on her.
I heard, and then she left him and he got real, real
sick. He died from cerrosis. But he got real, real sick and
he died. And then my um, my grandmother, my grandma of the
game to the funeral with a black eye. Another nigga had put his hand,
I said, bro, But then it was Mike Tyson fight. I
never forget it. Back in like nineties six or seven, all I remember
is my mom and my auntie leaving the fucking house super fast. They didn't
say where they was going. They said, don't open his motherfucking door.
They took the bats, they took some knives, and they want to go
beat this nigga's ass. You know what. They went to go beat because
my grandma wasn't gonna do it. They went and beat his as they should
they should have been. You know what's crazy, but you you for it
for my standards. You ever seen you ever seen a husky nigga be violent?
Or is it always the skinny nigga? But so, but I keep
hearing that little niggas got big dick. So you mean is that it is
that the hook? It gotta be. It must be the Captain hook that
Megan was talking about. Must be. But you know what, um,
I was an Alacia with a big nigga and he tried it and I hadn't
let him know. Real quick, pop, real quick, I was playing,
just play. He taught it. To this day, he's still like
she's crazy. He says, I'm my friends, She's fucking crazy. Yeah,
because you thought it was sweet. But as a I cannot say that
I had any um abusive niggas in my family that I know of. But
I can't. Honest I didn't. Well, I take the back, I
know one. But when I say that, I mean like my grandfather,
my great grandfather, my father, like they're protect the protect Well, my
uncle's they're protectors. You know what I'm saying. So niggah, woman,
you got you really gotta be you really gotta be man when I tell you,
I remember um. First of all, the niggas my mama. Man,
my mom was nuts. Bro, my mama let niggas have it.
And have you seen my MoMA before? My mom was a little as fuck,
Okay, but she hits like a maybe eight hundred pounds seven eight foot
tall nigga. The motherfucking hits hurt. Okay, she got a bunch of
brothers. Listen, she is. She's the only girl. But I remember
Um having to see her knock him up. Pop Pop beat her due that
one day. And never I had seen my mama, my aunt, and
the nigga was big. He was a big nigga. I hadn't seen my
mom my aunt. She blacked out called my uncle's like, your sister's beating
me up. I don't never swing again. That's what these my uncle said.
I bet you want to swing again, nigga. I don't even think
the guy that my auntie went crazy on even Swan Gar. We was eating
cereal and she just started be bopping his ass. I was like, what
the fuck? I had one motherfucker try it, not one I have.
I've had a few try it, um, but one that stands out is
um one of my baby daddy's. I ain't said the names, but we
got into it and I was just telling my mom about this earlier. We
got into a We're outside and at the time, I'm pregnant, but I
didn't know I was pregnant. So we get into it and we're outside and
we're all back and forth, and he keeps taking you know how my fuckers
take their fingers and keep doing this to your forehead and all that shit,
and I'm like, hey, abrout, like for real, chill, I
like, I'm not trying to get on that with you. I'm just telling
you give me my keys so i can leave. I'm not even trying to
go back and forth. If you keep trying to argue and argue, bitch,
I ain't giving you shit, dude, I'm like, bro, like
give me. I'm not even trying to be on mad. I'm trying to
wea you get my shit. He takes me and shoves me so fucking hard
that my head bounced off the concrete. Okay, nigga, you could have
killed me. Yeah, on your head, But I go. So I
went to the car, got my my fucking back out because I knew I
wasn't gonna shoot you. It wasn't you feel me. But I knew that
I was gonna make you feel the pain I felt. And I'm wearing him
all over the play back legs feet, I'm wearing you out with this in
my fucking back. His friends wanted to stop me so bad, but they're
like you. You pushed her, and she wasn't trying to fight you.
You pushed her for no fucking reason I never really understood. So I'm up
with that. You're getting that mad because I want to leave? Well,
no, that's what But that's what I argument was about. Because I wanted
to leave. I didn't feel like sitting here. And why are you so
emotional? Why are you so emotional? That you won't let me leave.
Yeah, it's not that serious, bro, I'm not trying to what.
You gotta watch out for those like you have to watch out for those.
They tried it again one day. I thought it was sweet. So he
like, call your bitchy ass brothers. Who Yeah, hello, my fucker's
swinging on me. Yeah nah nah, I probably wasn't even like that.
I didn't even tell I didn't. Why would I tell her to call you?
How you cool niggas coping? Please? But I thought you said call
that bitch ass I called this base. Yeah, like, man, that's
scary, it's funny. Yeah, I just couldn't. I don't know.
I'll say I couldn't. It couldn't be me. But you don't know.
To you in that situation, I know that if it's me, um,
one of us, no one of us are gonna it's gonna be an icy
Yeah. And this is why I tell this is why I tell people that,
you know, being in a serious relationship, Um, it's probably Being
in a healthy relationship is hard work because you think you can, You think
that you can leave the way you think you should leave. You think you
got options and health in a healthy relationship. Yeah, like if something happens,
like if something happens, you in a healthy relationship and damn boom,
you had a rough spot. You had a rough patch, and you're like,
man, fuck this shit. You know what I'm saying, because in
a rough patch, like it's rough. Like it's rough because everything you do
annoys me. The way you breathe annoys me. You fart in too loud,
the fucking annoyment you. And yeah, me too. So it's like
but it's like everything you do, everything you wear, you wearing that again,
like that type of ship. And then I can I can see how
you like, you fucked this. I'm gonna go to my mom's house or
da da da, and those instant in those instances, you have to not
leave and not sleep on the couch and not do those things. You got
to kind of communicate. And the problem with niggas is important, Niggas do
not know how to communicate. Say it one more time, Niggas don't know
how to communicate effectively. I keep listen, were you either you are nigga?
You are niggas? But do you have that issue though? Do you
have I don't know how what have you heard have you do you run into
issue is because of your communication. No, listen, no, listen to
me. Listen, I'm being so serious. The issues I'll run into is
because of my attitude. Um, I wish, I guess goes into communication
to a certain extent, But I have the attitude of where I've you feel
like people to be playing you. No, I've just been through so much
that my tolerance is very low for bullshit, right, And if it looks
like some bullshit, it smells like bullshit, it's bullshit, right, And
I'm quick to tell them a fucker instead of letting you think you're playing me
for stupid, I'm quick to tell you, like, no, this is
not that you got me fucked up? Yeah, what did Jennifer Lewis say?
I don't want nobody fucking with me and Niche streets. No, you
never heard it. We got to listen to it. But it's just the
actress. Yeah, but it's just the old lady. Yeah, Jennifer Lewis
is that bitch. But it's just a matter of like my current situation.
Um, I'm not even current because I've checked out. It is like I'm
not gonna keep telling you stop playing with me. It's not even playing.
It's just a communication. That's it. You do not when there is an
issue. The way you communicate is you shut the fuck down. The way
I feel like it should be done is to talk it out. It doesn't
argument, and that's the problems. If you know how to you don't.
That's not when you love somebody, you hear about somebody, you gotta figure
out a way. You gotta meet in the middle. I'm not gonna play
with that's a had me in a blender listen, but no, the what
was it? X Factor? No? No, no, it is Expector.
But what's no? What's the song with her and mary Is that what?
No? I don't know. It's a song with her and Mary Ja.
But it's all X Factor. I just can't get a name of it.
It's not called X Factor. It's called a miseducation. It is called
miseducation. Watch this. We're just looking crazy, right, And it's on
the Miseducation album. I don't know. I don't know that album is Miseducation
Lauren he or some shit. Yeah, okay, it's on that album.
Yeah, I don't know why. I don't know why men shut down when
we were doing when we were When it comes to communication, and I've often
been called sensitive because I'm talking about, Hey, you hurt my feelings.
I'm I'm talking about this shit because you're gonna make the mistake of doing it
again, and then you don't wonder why I'm not. You're gonna wonder why
I don't want to talk to you anymore. Especially in a relationship and our
friendship with your family, you need to be able to tell someone when they
hurt your feelings and it be cruel, like nigga if you are I'm in
my family, and they listen to this, So I gotta be choosing my
very I gotta choose my word. It's very wisely. My family has a
shortage of men in it, right, so a lot of the women in
my family worsting. At one point, one just passed rest in peace to
her She was single. Her first cousin is single. Yeah, a lot
of what men in my family are single. My mom is single. So
a lot of the times, I'm the nigga that talks too much because y'all
don't have men. So I'm the dad that's with the kids all the time
because I'm gonna stay at home Dad. I'm the I'm the dude. I'm
the guy that's always in tune with his emotions. Now, because y'all don't
understand men that don't get loud or I get drunk or hit you, I'm
the one that's like, yo, um, I don't want to be over
here because this, this, this, and this always happens. And I'm
cool on that. I'm trying to protect my peace and my family and not
really I don't really want to be on that. Then they get defensive because
it feels like a personal attack. I'm not personally attacking you. I just
know you. I know what's about to come, and I don't want to
I don't really want to deal with that shit. And even in relationships,
I've been in situations where I'm like, I see where this is going,
so can we not go there? Oh? So what you're trying to look?
So now I just tried to avoid going there. But I guess me
trying to avoid going there just sent you there. And now I'm all the
way tapped out because I tried. We're not even now we're fighting because I
didn't want to fight. So this So a lot of the times it's just
you know their childhood traumas and shit just interfering and just the more, Like
Black Widow has shown me this, you haven't really done this, but everybody
else has done this. You Andrea Yourea Jones, and Byron y'all four are
the only four that has not done this. I start when people fuck up.
I start to see their childlike behavior come in and they start to shut
They start to shut down, and they try to they start to do themselves.
They start to they turn into little kids, and then I have to
become a parent or a coach and coach them out of that. But I
start to see how people doubting themselves make them get defensive. People people like
I'll be like, I know you can do it. I've heard you do
it, and then they'd be like, all right, I got it.
Then that cut me off and opposed to me because I don't like you when
you do that. So but I know you're not doing that to shut me
up. You're doing that because you feel uncomfortable. So I'm gonna allow that.
But that comes with growth, because at first I used to get really
shitty and I would I would just fire motherfucker's all right, Well, until
I understood that you you think you have to go on a defense with me,
and you don't, and I and yeah, and and but a lot
of the times a lot of people feel so let's say, let's say the
person you're currently talking to it whatever or what could talk to no more niggas.
I'm free. I don't hearing these streets. Get it. Don't get
at your girl, please don't. A lot of the times, a lot
of the times, people give up quickly because they give up at the point
in which most people have given up on them. That's what I've realized.
So it's not even the fact that they want to give up or they want
to shut down. It's that when I go past this point, it usually
doesn't end well for me, and I don't want to experience those feelings.
So I'm gonna shut down right here, which caused it the same outcome.
I'm going to lose you. But at least when I lose you, it's
not because it's something that idea. Even though I'm losing you because of something
that I did, which is not communicate it's it's some nigga. It's some
niggadum. But yeah, it's some niggadum. But a lot of the men
men women have made it hard for me to communicate because women do not like
men overly communicating their emotions because it kind of it comes up. They think
it's feminine. Seeing I'm the opposite. Talk to me, nigga, say
help me. Vulnerability with men, Vulnerability with men often ends. Vulnerability with
men often ends and me giving you information that then you turn around in my
face, and that is a problem. Somebody just who them? What's his
name? Nia? It's your people? Um you do? Why can't Keenan?
Kennan just made a status the other part? Yeah, he's he's he's
he's advocate for that. He made a status the other day, like I
can't even remember. I'm about to go look at it on Facebook. This
nigga said something like women hate Uh why do women hate men? Or some
shit like that where it And it made sense though, because hold, let
me see. Facebook will not show you what you saw the other day.
So if you find that, boom okay, he shared. That's what he
did. He shared a status it said this generation a man hate women so
bad? He said, I'm so tired of this possible shit. Y'all hate
yourselves. Start with that. Don't blame mus It goes both ways. What
I feel like we as let me not say well, because I'm not in
that category. Um black women due to a sense that they're always putting down
the black man. If a man expresses his feelings or any of that shit,
then he's gay or he's down low. But it goes with the men
too. If women express theirselves or you know, any of that shit,
then it's, uh, oh, well you feel me, she's a bitch
um that whole nine. Why is it that it's not okay for a man
to express how he feels without having to be called gay or down or because
femini it or he has bitch ways? Why why can't a woman express herself
without being called a bitch? Why because your tone is that? But I
don't, I shouldn't. Here's the thing. Though my tone is my tone,
it does not mean that what I am saying to you, I'm I'm
a bitch. I'm expressing my feelings. I'm coming I might be coming from
my hurt place, but that does not make me a bitch. My tone
does not. This is my tone twenty four seven. This is how I
talk to people. So when I come to you, and I say,
Eric, that hurt my feeling. I'm already feeling guilty. But this is
my tone. So you sh' you being a bit for being a bitch pretty,
but this this is my tone. So I'm talking to you how I
would normally talk to you. I think it's disappointment too. I think I
think like once Sar talk to me, I feel like a fucking kid,
especially like when I know I did, I know I'm slacking or something like
that, and she'd be like, she'll communicate that to me, and I'd
be like, I'm more so mad at myself, but I it's misplaced aggression
and I put that on her. But a lot of the time, sometimes
bitches be bitching sometimes. But but we can't group. But the problem is
we were grouping everybody even like during the I can't remember what happened, UM
and we were going through it was during the pandemic, but some something transpired
that UM had women, uh telling black men that they needed to protect us
more. Maybe that's what it. Maybe that's what it was black men.
Maybe I think there were so many men not defending her. Yeah, and
um, so I started seeing so many statuses on Facebook about how the black
man does not protect the black woman, and and I made the status like,
I don't know what black men y'all are surrounded by because the black men
in my life, from my daddy to my grandfather, to my great grandfather,
to my brothers to my uncles, I have always been protected no matter
what. It didn't matter if it was against the man, a woman,
an officer. I have always been protected. So when we when I kept
seeing he said it something like, y'all, we got we have we as
women, as black women and as black men. We have got to stop
um attacking one of one another. So we got to stop bringing each other
dawn. This is because that's where we keep getting this miscommunication from it.
Everybody's always oh with the black man's not protecting the woman. The woman's not
protected? To me, yes, yes we are so so I remember I
remember that just that time on Facebook, and I think this is why I
deleted my Facebook. Um, I don't know if people are saying these things
because they truly feel this way, or are they trying to get reactions from
people, right, So a lot of the times I don't be knowing And
then i'm I'm now I'm emotionally invested because I feel like, well, shit,
I protect all the black woman that all right, that I that I
that I uh that are in my circle, all the black women in my
circle. I hope they love me like I think about him, and I
be like like, I'm I've been missing my my home girls. I'd be
like, man, I really because I got kids and shit now and all
that, but I'd be like Dan, he went off on other day.
I just want you to know. I want to know real quick before you
finish. Yes, he is very protective. I had a panic attack last
week and I just told him about it a couple days ago, and my
god, he was ready to wring my neck about it. Well, because
because people be going through so much stuff, right, Like, people go
through so much shit. And we have a little community in your community is
your community and my community is mine, but we we are circles, crossover.
Yeah, And I just felt like, damn, something could have happened
to you and I wouldn't have known. And I think, you know,
I think that's what bothered me the most. But I understand it. I've
never had a panic attack, so I I don't understand. I don't know
the protocol that you should take once you have one. So I'm happy that
you did what you did so you can get the relief. I went to
the person that has experienced them the most, and do you know what's messed
up? I'm gonna shout her out because we were not even speaking at the
time. But y'all was cool at the party though, no, we weren't.
We didn't speak at the party. We didn't share not one I was
standing right next week and we didn't shared, not one conversation. I didn't
ask her to pass the sault or nothing we shared at that party was late
okay, happy motherfucker thirty fifth again, but we shared no conversation, No
conversation was shared. But we was on the dance floor side by side and
didn't dance with one of nothing. But the minute that it was going down,
it was going down, and she was there in two point five seconds.
So Jamilla Gonzealous, Jamilla Hernandez. I love because you don't come across
people like like you know, don't Yeah, you got and you have to
h you gotta hold them people that matters. You know what bothers me about
those people in your circles? Right, Well, I told my wife this
when we first got together. I said, she had two friends, and
I asked her, I said, how close are you and your friends because
they never come over here and you don't never go over there. And well,
one of her friends got some kids, she's married and stuff like that,
so I understood her work schedule. So I understood that, and that's
my niggatue. But the other one. I was very peculiar about this other
one. And we have not seen her since before we had the twins.
So I asked her, I said, well, I told her this before
we had the kids, Before we had kids, I said, you don't
know who your friends are until they're in a relationship. You do not know
that your friends are your friends until they are in a relationship, and the
friendship continues because a lot of the times your friends, you don't know your
friends because they're always available to you. And once somebody has to go out
of their way to make plans to see you, then that's when you kind
of that's when you kind of can see. Let me tell you, this
girl has been getting dicked and has disappeared. She has not heard from her,
has not talked to her, and I hate that I hate that for
my wife because this is a woman that you put in that circle, that
ring of I'm calling this person when something bad is happening to me, but
you her friend is maybe going through some shit with this guy and don't want
to reach back out because maybe she don't want to be embarrassed, or she's
embarrassed for herself, or or maybe she doesn't wan to burden her problems.
But y'all are friends. That's kind of my job. Let me tell you
though, this is how we think that, right, So how can I
protect you if if you're not allow me to do my job. But that's
how it's sometimes how we think. But if women, if black women think
like that, then how can a black man protect you? But but do
you understand me saying this is how we think sometimes? And it goes back
to that's why I said I don't understand what I can't um support or understand
when a woman or a man says that we don't protect one another. I'm
telling you why she might be doing it, But I'm not saying it's okay
even when my issues like even like when my my well, my grannie passed
away. Um, my friend Arianna her grandma passed away in twenty twenty one,
short stuff, and yes it's a really pretty face. She's gorgeous,
beautiful. But her granny passed away in twenty twenty one, and then she
lost her grandfather um early in twenty twenty two, and my grannie passed away,
and they're getting rid of all the old niggas. Ain't man, this
world's crazy. Let the let the take. It's a few young motherfuck never
mind anyway, because we'd we'd been listening, I'll make a list for you.
You want me to be the grand reapayer but um, but no.
So when my when my grannie passed UM. First of all, when she
was in the hospital, Porky stopped everything she was doing to beet by my
side and check on me. And I felt like she was reliving what I
had I am going through. She had already gone through it, so she's
not reliving this. And then when she passed, she was out with her
nigga at the time, and it's like one in the morning, and when
I'm calling her telling her I'm heading to the hospital, um, She's like,
okay, let me know if you need me to come. And I
get to the hospital I get the news and I call her. I didn't
even I couldn't even get the words out of my mouth. And that's exactly
what she said. And I'm trying to tell her through my tears, like
no, don't come, it's okay, you're out, baby. She hung
up on me within not even a full ten minutes. She was right there
by my side, picking me up off the ground. I have no idea
how she found me, how she knew what floor to come to, but
she came. Yeah, And we don't hang out every single We talked Dania
every day, but we don't hang out. The hanging out. I don't
hang out with her every day. How the hanging out part is not m
it's not essential. But you communicate with these people on a regular on a
regular yeah, but it's just like you know, to me, that's important
because we just maybe two years ago, we were in a bad space with
one another. Um we had missed a disagreement and it caused us to go
a few months without talking to each other. So we have been working to
fix our relationship with each other. Granted, we've still been you know,
talking and hanging out here and there, but we weren't hanging out every day,
and the relationship was a little strange, but that showed me that no
matter what me and her go through, that's my friend, right, That's
gonna always be my friend. She's gonna always for real, that's my Woody
to my buzz light Year. Okay, that's a good analogy. Yeah,
because she she is her shan Ya um Ebony Shany with the Jay. Why
don't know that person. I don't know that they call her. She calls
herself Erica, but um Erica Jay on Instagram? Oh yeah, yes,
yeah, he Shanay Christy, people of Kayla Turquoise. Those people no matter
what I'm going through, he was named all crazy people. Oh yeah,
they are, and they're crazy over me. They're crazy for me because it
doesn't matter what I go through. And it's times where I really be feeling
like I genuinely don't have nobody to go to, and I'm reminded of people
like y'all, like, you know, no matter what, pick up the
phone I got. That's all I do was make a phone call. And
you don't be wanting the burden people, but lay there even when you don't
want to be bothered. It's times I didn't. I didn't want to talk
to nobody for weeks, and they was popping up harassing me. Those are
type of people they are. I might have to I might have to.
I might have to harass my wife's friend and like, where the fuck are
you at? Ask her She's okay. Sometimes that's really what it takes.
Because it was during the pandemic. I had drifted off from them, and
they're like, are you good. I'm good. I'm enjoying this piece.
I'm enjoying not being in these streets. I'm I'm enjoying being on punishment for
the first time in my life. I've been grounded so many times as a
child. Maybe when they put us, I felt like I was falling down
as the rain dropped, I felt like, Eva me, I need my
mon. No, that's how I think. I think too. I think
too, And we can end this because it's been about an hour. I
think that. Um. I think communication and the trauma that people have experienced
has a huge impact how they receive love and how they give love. My
thing is I've always I've always been the one to either over communicate, like
we admit me and see era together. Well, I'll just be the one
that carries conversation. I'm always the way I talk too much, so i've
I've accepted that role. Or I'll know everything about a person and they know
nothing about me because I've allowed them important to me. But when it comes
to like arguing traumas or settling disputes, I try to foresee some shit and
I try to I try to nip that shit in the bud. I don't
really want to go there with you. I'm not trying to go there with
you. If I did something, I'm sorry. I did not mean to
do that, because if I was if I I feel like for me,
arguments don't make sense because either you're wrong or I'm wrong or a misunderstanding or
so. A lot of the times I'd be like, year, what did
I just say? And She'll repeat some shit back I said, I did
not say that. That is not at all what I said. She was
like what did you say? And I'd be like ABC. She'd be like,
oh, I'm like, bro, we could have had a full fledged
fucking fight over some shit that I never even said, and I would have
argued with you if I was in a bad mood. But I don't want
to go there with anybody. So I feel like I feel like I just
never understood getting into it with a person that you like. Dude, I'm
not trying to hurt you. I told my mom. She was like,
do you want to come up here? I was like, no, man,
I don't want to come up But why would you tell me that?
Well, I don't want it. I don't you ask me. But I'm
not trying to hurt you. I want you. I want to be and
I want you to be honest with me. Like a lot of the times,
I get backlash because I'm too honest. I'm like, bro, you
as you asked me a very specific question, I'm giving you a very specific
answer. I don't know understand why you be from with me, but see,
and then I get angry because I make it black and white for you.
I don't make nothing. I don't I don't give you no in between
I tell you, and then people will be giving you black dot com giving
me. That's like if I'm mad, I see in your face and I'll
tell you. Just tell me what it is, right, be honest with
me, because every time, every time somebody told me that before, somebody
told me to be honest, and I told him that, and I was
honest, and then I got backlash. So now I'm lying. See,
but I tell my son the same thing. This is this is why I
get angry when I'm lied to and he'll tell you back, I say,
I asked him when he when he lies? I say, what is the
number one thing I hate? What makes me more angry than anything in this
world? He says, being lied to? Why? Because it's it's on
your intelligence. Tell me the truth because you you lie to me. You
basically called me a dumb bitch, and I don't understand it. Tell me
what's up. Just be real. You don't have to lie to me about
shit, nothing, nothing. Just tell me the truth that I think.
You don't give me nothing else to be honest, I think, to the
repercussions of being honest, I don't really like those. I don't I'd rather
face repercussions of honesty than then me lying at someone and face that because you've
broken something. If you're being honest with me, and I'll get upset with
you, I'm probably gonna be upset for two point five seconds, if even
that. If you lie to me and I believe the lie, and then
I find out that it is a lie. Oh yeah, yeah, hey
baby, Yeah, because what did you lie for it? Now? I'm
mad at you forever and ever forever ever. Yeah, yes, it's because
I can't trust nothing. You say. You're gonna tell me two plus two
equal four, and I'm gonna keep thinking of equal six because why did you
just lie to me? Yeah? I think too. Um No, A
lot of men don't know how to communicate like a man should because there are
not enough men around that know that, that knows how to effectively communicate.
Because my dad sucks at communication. My grandfather is great at talking. See.
It used to be, Oh, we have my dads, but then
I get niggas. Got your dad, got your daddy and mama, your
mama, your daddy. Man, What do you say to Clarence O eight
mail? Yeah, you're your dadd you're your mom, got a real good
marriage, your mom and daddy still together? Niggah, What you mean you
don't know how to communicate? What your daddy been lying to your mamma all
this time? Yeah? But twenty thirty some years Yeah, Well, my
my serious parents, her parents, Sera's parents, her Sierra's parents said that
they would um not allow the kids to see them have arguments. And I
respect that. I appreciate, but I respect that. But that means that
they've never seen you argue and resolve it. You know what I'm saying.
I get that too, Like like this, it depends on what. It
depends on what. It depends on what the argument is over agree. So
I gonna say it. Certain things that your children just don't need. Like
my kids, I have never seen. They know I can get violent,
but they've never seen me get violent. They've they've never well, Corey had
to see it when they tried him at school. Baby came to the school
like what's up right? Then he had to see because I'm in the school
talking about who who don't fight? Kids? Baby, I look like a
kid. I look like I'm like thirteen. What are we doing right now?
He has some thirty year old cities, my niggas whatever. It's some
man, it's some kids. The keys kids today, Baby look like they
about thirty. So I could fit in the slide for a thirteen year old
real quick if I need, but boop your ass and then gonna get your
Mamaska to the fruity her ass because what and that's how to tell the principle.
He had some girls. One day, I'm gonna say this, I'm
done. Um he calls me. One day I'm handing my business and this
is around called Corey School, and this is around the time that my granny
had pass. I already have built up anger that need to be needed to
be let let out. And he calls me. He's like my At first,
I think he's playing around. He's like me, they jump me,
and I'm like, humh, I'm thinking he's talking about some dudes to jump
you. So I'm sliding in the shoes, telling my granddaddy I'm to have
to clock out real quick and slide to the school. So he's like,
yeah, they jump me. They jump me, And I'm like, who
jumped you? So I get to the car, He's like these girls and
gym and did it? I said, Oh, but okay, hold on,
baby, And I'm my grandaddy lived right across the street from the school.
So I'm at the school on two point five. As I'm dropping to
the school, I'm telling them to the principal, I'm on my way,
I'll be there. Had them girls up front and line them up. So
when I get in there. Do you hear me? I was p that
night. So I get there and the principal caused she caused him down.
We all getting air and we're all talking or whatever, and she's like,
so, um, yeah, I need names and d and he's like,
I don't know everybody named because they pulled my hood over my head so I
couldn't see everything that was going on. And so I'm like, well,
just give me one name. All I need is one. And by the
time I get done with her, she don't give me the rest, right,
but by the way, but so the principals like miss Taylor, she's
like, I understand. You know, if it was my son, i'd
feel the same way. And I'm like, that's cool. I'm glad that
you are, you know, emphasize one, but I don't care about none
of that. Bringing them kids down here, line them up and then call
their mama's and line them up nixt and if you need to call their dad.
He's called them. We're gonna line them up because you're not gonna put
your hands on my son. And like I told him, like she was
like, well, I for one, I appreciate you not putting your hands
back on them, and see the thug of me wanted to be like,
next time, you not her real quick, and she'll never do it again,
and so then her friends won't do it either. But but see he
We then got it established and I let the principal everybody, no, I
say, please, don't ever a mistaken think that because his little sister is
eight that he don't cut other people. That will shut things down. My
nieces playing kids, they will shut it down. So we had to get
it all understood in But why are we telling this story? I don't know
how we got on the subject you beating up kids. I didn't beat him
up, but I will. That's scary. Listen, listen, not you
beating up kids, but if it is scary to train your daughters not to
hit boys, train your boys not to hit girls. Because even my daughter
experienced a little boy hitting her and Coore, he had to go this is
becore. He was still at the school. He went over there and snatched
a little boy up and told him, he said, I will whoop your
ass if you put your hands on my sister again. Yeah, dangling,
I don't understand well now that now that Dorian is kind of like reciprocating or
repeating the behavior that I have with his sisters. He's he's doing exactly what
I do with him, So he's the own ladies. He'll kiss them on
the cheek and he'll do the exact same thing something like damn, Now it's
making sense to me, Like, oh, these niggas are they've seen this
somewhere before. Yeah, yeah, and it's at home because they don't even
have movies where niggas is hidden girls unless they're watching too be ye. But
yeah, that's communication communication and men men men feeling safe enough to be to
be vulnerable. But a lot of the times women are women are women are
repeating behaviors that they've seen their moms. Do you know what I'm saying,
Like they they on some this you gotta have this, or you can't come
to me and talking about this, or like some women just some women just
do not understand what it means to be your man's friend, to be in
love. It's a it's a it's being be your man's friend. Yeah.
A lot of the times Nigga's best friends be and a lot of the times
Nigga's friends don't even be knowing shit about them they keep that shitting. I
don't know. Man, women just gotta as a woman, we have business.
We have to open that door and let our men know that they are
protected as well. It is okay to come to me and talk to me.
We gotta communicate. We can't just shut each other out because we have
no relationship. There's no real love if I cannot express myself to you and
you express yourself to me and it not me. It won't come off me
being a bitch and you coming off being overly sensitive, or you being feminine,
or you, oh, you want to be the bitch you want me
to wear the pin? No, like, let that man express himself to
you. Hope the fuck it makes for better sex, does it? Yes?
Being able to get a good communicator when I get some good communication did
me, because because I had to. I was like, Hey, I'm
only giving you dick to please you. However I need to please you.
It's gonna make me come. So tell me exactly what you want me to
do, and I'm gonna listen to it. It's not me thinking that I
know everything. I want you to tell me what to do and tell me
what you like, and don't be afraid of telling me what you like or
and vice versa, tell me what you won't. Yeah, why are you
not doing the dance? Gets like that? Damn nig I never really understood
why niggas got so hyping that song came on? Stop playing? Hey,
you know what you know? A song? You know? A song really
gets on my nerves? Uh? And my bad remix so so death remix
not? I skip it? Because what the fuck are JD and the Bratt
talking about? What they say? I never pays this shit. They're talking
about money? All I got is a dollar dollar bill? Or what's the
deal? Like he uh boom do do du If you want to dance,
I'm gonna make you dance. They come on with that. I've got this
feeling. Why are we dancing to this? Getting names to you? You
gonna dance because God with you? Why? Because being who? I can't
lose? But what happened? My friends can't telling me, But what I
hope da wrong somebody. If my friends are telling me my girl is fucking
somebody else, I'm not hoping they're wrong, because why are they telling me
about what you're doing with your mouth? Hey, I didn't know, Stop
playing, man, it's really going down out of here? Why you to
my camera because it was First of all, I ain't shit. Let's record,
all right, Brittany, I love you, I love you. I
love that bonnut you have on. I'm not even being. I'm not being.
First of all, it's not a bonnet. Ladies and gentlemen, I
got on my Still it's really nice. Head scarf was really nice because it's
raining outside and she gots to protect the braids. Yes, it's really nice
because the baby's will come on. Now man, oh your hair, because
your hair is so fine, why would they come out? Not come out?
But I'm talking about mines and no, my hair will start getting napped
up. Okay, we gotta protect that. It get wet, it get
curly. Oh your hair get curly. Yeah, that's what I's not.
Be still, you're braided. It's like sit, doggy, sit, there's
your cored Episode three. Yes, it's hard to hear. Yes, please
all right, we'll see you'll when we see out man. Good day, governess ass