I want to run something by you, okay, because I'm gonna gonna be
honest with you a little bit, a little bit, a little bit transparent,
a little bit open. I've been a little sad lately because when Carson
graduated from college, I realize that I have no kids that really depend on
me. I mean a little emotional that that really depend on me. And
he does, because you know, he still needs me in calls and whatever.
But it kind of you look around and you go, Wow, who
needs me? You know what I mean? And it's a weird thing because
you know, I mean, Susan still needs me, and my kids still
need me, but you kind of go, who needs me? Now?
Yeah, I guess I thought I will say Carson definitely still does. I
mean, you pay a lot of his bills still, so until he can
actually pay his own bills, then that's the day when he's like, you
know what, Dad, I'm paying for my entire rent, myself and my
whatever. Then I feel like that's like the real that's part of it.
He doesn't pay all of his bills because we got to give him a chance.
The place the only place to get into the music business is to live
in La you cannot get into the music business really by living in Minneapolis and
trying to work in LA So we are paying for some of his bills,
but it's less and less all the time. He's working for an artist that
they have. Now this is kind of funny. They said, hey,
Carson, can you do this artist social media? And if I haven't told
you, I haven't even told Fallon. I don't think who the artist is.
I don't want to jink say change. But I was confused by it
because the last like the last last time we spoke, it wasn't the artist's
assistant. It was like his assistance assistant. And then when I came back
from one day off or but you were gone for a week, you then
said it was the artist assistant. So I was confused. Yeah, well,
he was working for one artist named Issa, and Issa is in a
he's a rapper and I can't remember, it's right on the tip of my
tongue. It doesn't matter. And Carson was working for his assistance assistant,
and that kind of like fell through that one. No, so there's another
one one that I have actually heard of, is what I'm talking about,
right, So he was offered last night the social media director for this artist,
so they'd be the social media The look on Felon's face right now says
it all. I said, Carson, you are not good at social media.
That why would they even offer that to him? They have he hasn't
even had he done anything to show them he knows how to do social media.
That is strange. No, but I think that they assume because he's
twenty two years old. Yeah, and this is something that you know.
I don't want to tell the Carson. I know, I told you so,
I told you so. But for years I've been saying, do social
media, dude, It's so important, just to get the hang of it.
And I said, you are a drummer, post videos of you playing
the drums. Nobody does that. I'm like, no, everybody does that.
So anyway, he's paying more and more of his bills. Is he
going to do it? Oh, he's gonna do it, but I'm gonna
lecture. I feel like you should he shouldn't say no, yep, because
what if you don't get another chance. And I looked at this artist social
media and it's I could do it. It's Dave Ran level. It's not
like really creative it's good as solid good photos. So anyway, so there
was that. So I want to bring up here's an idea for you,
so we all talk about mental health, mental health, mental health. I
want to bring up the idea of mental strength, and I want to get
your opinion on this one because I think that right now there is a trend
in our culture, in our society to say mental health, mental health,
mental health, and that's so important because now we feel comfortable about saying,
yeah, I would therapy, or I've got some depression or whatever. But
I also want to promote what I think is mental strength because listen, there
are going to be some hard fucking times in your life and you can't always
collapse on the couch and drink and cry, well, especially if people are
depending on you. True. So I want to promote the idea and I
want you to give me some feedback as you listen to the podcast of mental
strength combined with mental health and treatment and things like that, because I am
pretty lucky and pretty fortunate that I've got very good mental health. Right now,
I'm going through some stuff that makes me go, God, I'm kind
of sad, but I have a reserve of mental strength. That makes me
go, I'll get through this. I will go out for a run or
go for a walk, or ride my motorcycle or do whatever it is that
makes me regenerate my pool, recharge my mental strength. And I think that
some people go, oh, I'm really sad. I need to drink or
I am going to see if I can get on some sort of medication.
And I think that's valid if you and your doctor agree that it's valid.
But I also want to promote mental strength. Mental strength is going, Yeah,
that kicked me in the ass. I got fired. I didn't see
that coming, but I am motherfucking strong, so I am going to be
I'm going to have mental strength. So you're a friend, tell me your
thoughts. I guess I would be more curious on what the promotion of it
is, like what are you telling people to do? Because people like an
as action plan when there's something like what is the action plan? I think
to realize that you've been through stuff before, you can handle this. So
instead of just saying mental health, go get treatment, mental health, go
get treatment, to say, hey, you know what if you got a
bad sunburn and you can't join your friends on you know, like bedemcoska or
menetonka. This weekend, it's okay, mental strength. Tap into your mental
strength because you have more than you think you do. Yeah, you're stronger
than you think you are. Rather than saying, oh, this is the
worst go motherfucker. I can't be out there this weekend, but next weekend,
I'm going to be out there with you. Well, mind over matter
has always been a thing. I mean I said that, like, especially
when you're writing or something. You can physically do it all at the time,
but mentally quit. But I would say I support it to a degree.
I think I don't think it's necessarily the healthiest thing. If you have
gone through something and you're like, I'm strong, and you move on and
you don't address maybe some of the things with it. And I'm not talking
about medication. I'm a weird medication person. I grew up with parents who
are addicts. I don't I don't even like taking advil. I'm like,
I'm weird. I do not enjoy taking medication at all. So, like
anytime I've gone to a therapist and they've been like, maybe you should get
on anxiety medicine or something, I'm like, I don't think you're the person
for me because I don't. I am just so weird about it. But
I know that so many people need it. So aside from medication therapy,
for instance, I do think that there are some things you should work through
just because yeah, it's a natural thing to be like. For instance,
I don't. I don't like to talk about a certain point of my life,
and I just I honestly have I honestly forget about it sometimes because I
don't talk about it. I don't like to talk about it, and I
don't want to. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want
to address what happened. I want to move on. I don't think that's
the healthiest thing. But I have been strong enough for it to not completely
affect me anymore. No, and no, and you do great, And
I think that what you said is true. I will kind of compare it
to people who get overly sensitive and get overly offended by something. Let's say
you're on Facebook and you say something like, you know, I love peanuts.
There's nothing like a great bowl of peanuts, and somebody who like,
how dare you? I have a peanut allergy? And you just triggered me
and it's like, are you fucking kidding me? So that's a little bit
of an exaggeration where it's like the person with a peanut allergy, Hey,
listen, I sympathize with you, but get over it. All I did
was bring up peanuts. So I think my thing is just because your veterinary
bill is two thousand dollars and you're going to have to skip your trip to
Cancoon mental strength. So I'm just I'm kind of like advocating for you to
instead of to just fold right away, to be mentally strong, because I
really believe you're stronger than you think you are. You don't have to get
offended by somebody who posts a bowl of peanuts on your Facebook, so in
the same way, you don't have to collapse because you're a new muffler on
your car. Yeah, So anyway, tell me what you think. And
I could be totally wrong, but I think there might be something there.
It's kind of like we work out our bodies, right, so when we
get exposed to something, our bodies can fight it off. It's kind of
like the same way we like toughen up our bodies and you know, be
healthy in the same way we can toughen up our minds. But I have
no idea what I'm talking about, just a thought. Let's move on to
an email from a lease titled am I Crazy? Well, first of all,
I'm triggered by the word crazy because I think that it is not fun.
Oh, move on, okay, says hello friends. I was telling
somebody about my typical routine when I leave the grocery store. They said I
was excessive and crazy, so of course I want your opinion for reference.
I usually go grocery shopping after I'm off work six pm or so, and
I almost always have my one year old with me, So usually go to
Target, Walmart, Trader Joe's, and so pretty typical store. I always
parked near a cart return since I have my kid and I know I'm gonna
need a cart no matter how much I get, and I try to have
one side clear four ease of getting in and out. When I'm done,
I go to my car, open the trunk and I don't unlock the car.
I load up the trunk, go to return my cart with my son.
Then I put him in the car seat. After I opened the door,
I locked the doors from the outside, get him buckled in, keep
it locked until I get to my door, unlock my door, get in,
and drive away. I know I seem as excessive, but especially recently,
I've heard of so many things about a grocery store parking lot can be
one of the most unsafe, most unsafe areas for a woman and somebody with
kids, since you seem most vulnerable, and it's not hard for me to
clock my fob and lock the doors, so it's me or click my fob
and lock the doors. So to me, it's why not make sure my
son and I stay safe. I didn't used to be this cautious until I
had him, or quite honestly, and still I started taking him out of
the car seat when we go places. Am I crazy? Or is it
valid? If it makes you feel better? I am behind it. I
don't do that. My routine is I go out, I put Olive in
her car seat, get her locked in, then I put shut her door,
put all the groceries in the back, shut that. Then I go
return my cart, which you know now thinking of it is kind of unsafe,
but it's like usually two cars away from me, and then I get
in and start my car and leave. So I think that what you're doing
makes sense. It actually makes me question what I'm doing. Yeah, exactly.
No, I don't think you're crazy at all. I think that.
You know, there's some people live in the city or the country that they
don't lock their doors at night. No, my grandma never. I mean
she might now, but like my family, they just don't do that.
I don't know. I mean I locked my doors. I grew up locking
my doors. We just did. Even in the middle of nowhere, Colorado,
we locked our doors. It's whatever makes you feel comfortable, and if
that makes you feel comfortable and safe, then you are not crazy for doing
it at all. It's like somebody saying you go to the dentist twice a
year. You don't need to go to the dentist twice a year. Well,
if it makes you feel better, it's actually better for you. So
the next one that Jennifer says, I agreed. Are you signed up for
your team to clean up the road. But I'm scared of the ticks and
the media are saying they're so extra this season. Ug. I seriously hate
bugs and every living flying creature. I will kill them. Sorry, but
I have taken time off work and I will be there to clean up your
road clean up our roadways. See you there. You thank you, Jennifer.
You know what, I thanks for putting that fear into me. I
didn't fear ticks until you just now brought it up. Well, you were
out. Jake and Olive have both had a tick already this year, and
they're very, very popular, so you need to be checking. They're very
popular. They are. They're like, like how we mentioned that mosquitos are
going to be crazy this year, ticks are even worse. My friend posted
about her kid having when I posted it on my Instagram, tens people getting
them on their dogs. You need to be checking Josie when you bring her
in wearing a very wooded area. So I know it's like more intense,
But if you're going to parks and always check your kid's head, it's a
good point. I know. The mosquitos are out. I got my first
mosquito bite about three days ago. And last night was out for a walk
in an area in Chan that I walk all the time, and I got
bit probably ten or fifteen times last night by mosquitos. So the mosquitoes are
out. They're saying it's going to be a horrible mosquito season. But Jennifer,
thank you for signing enough for the road cleanup, and it's not too
late to do that. We're doing that Thursday at eleven o'clock and we'd love
to have you out there. It's an hour and fifteen minutes worth of picking
up trash. We don't want to overdo it because we want to enjoy it,
not go God. When is this over? Dear Dave, don't use
my name. I'm curious on your thoughts on paying your kids college education versus
letting them pay their own way. My daughter is off to college this fall
and FAFSA did not provide anything other than a small loan which will not cover
tuition tuitions roughly twenty nine thousand per year. She's applied for many scholarships,
no success. There seems to be an expectation from the college and frankly most
people around me that I will just co sign for a loan for her for
the rest. But I'm conflicted on this. First of all, I absolutely
trust my daughter to pair bills, but honestly, what parent ever co signed
thinking their kid was going to fail. I don't want to put my own
finances at risk for her college experience, even if it never comes back to
haunt me personally. I don't know that I can, in good conscience sign
her up for a lifetime of debt the moment she graduates from college. Am
I alone in feeling this way? Hopefully doesn't make me sound like a bad
parent? Thinks No, I think that I admire you for not absolutely open
it up the purse and saying I'm going to pay for this for you.
I think if you are a parent and you have enough means to make your
kids to pay for your kids college, even then you might want to say
I'm gonna pay part of it, but I'm not paying all of it,
because if you could easily afford twenty nine thousand dollars a year, sometimes it's
better for your kid to learn the responsibility of ownership. It's kind of like,
you know, you buy a car you're going to pay for You're going
to take better care of it if you paid for it yourself than if mommy
and Daddy bought it for you. I say, it depends a lot on
your daughter, but I say help her out if you can. But she
if she is able in some way to take out the loans and pay them
back. I would say, do that. I mean, I am.
I think I'm more like you in this situation. So we've had this discussion
with our financial advisor, Jake and I do not plan to pay for college
for our kids. She our financial advisor. So that paying for your kids
college. Paying for kids college is what keeps people from retiring now, people
who would have retired. It completely. It dramatically affects people's retirement, okay,
because average person doesn't have extra thirty thousand dollars a year, and that
if they do that, that is their retirement. And so people can't retire
at a certain age anymore because they're paying for kids college and it's outrageous.
So we do not plan to. However, we do plan to help them
if they need help. If they reach out and they need help with food,
they need help with housing, they need help with books or whatever,
We're not going to say no, we want to help them. We also
are doing things now to set them up to help them for their futures in
general. And I think that it's okay if you choose to pay for your
kids and that's really important to you. I know a lot of people do
that. That's great, but I don't think it makes you a bad person
if you don't do it. Loans are like the lowest interest rate you can
get for any type of loan. I'm pretty sure. And yeah, I
mean even with like Dylan's car, We're not buying Dylan a car will help
Dylan, but Dylan has to make payments to us. That's going to be
part of it. And that is it today for the Minnesota goodbye. Sorry
to cut it short, but send those emails to Ryan Show at katwdb dot
com. Let me know your thoughts on mental strength. Love to hear about
that. Thank you for listening.