What is up? Welcome back to the softcore history Patreon as we soldier our
way to five hundred patrons. I know we're supposed to be ever green,
but you know what, I'm just excited. I just want to hit that
five hundred number. I want to hit that fucking It's like a home run,
you know what I mean. I want that five hundred homer. I
feel like we're in the Hall of fame once we hit five hundred. Well,
financially, I'll feel better when we're at like five thousand. Yeah,
yeah, Yeah, that's where I will be really happy. Yeah. Please
tell your friends and family and I don't know, he don't even have to
tell them. Just sign them, sign them up for it. Sign up
your dad with dementia. He's still got a credit card, it hasn't expired
yet. Your ex adder on. Yeah, if you have a boss,
him on old card logged in your laptop like I still do somehow, I'm
not gonna say which boss. Yeah, expense it. Expense it to the
company that you don't work for it. If you're a history teacher, tax
right off, boom boom, all that all that type is. They're not
going to ask questions. They never do the I r S. I don't
look into stuff, hopefully not for my sake for real, not even because
I have anything to hide. And I don't mean that like I have nothing
to hide. I'm a moral person. I mean like I just don't have
anything and nothing too high. But I have nothing. I have nothing.
But still there's some things they could uncover. I definitely committed tax fraud at
some point. Is it fraud or are you just bad at taxes? Right?
It's it's only like you're saying that you're a murderer when you just committed
manslaughter. You know, I'm just bad with numbers. Really, you just
gotta go in with that. Yeah, oh dude, I didn't know any
murder. I should also treat every date like it's a business dinner, Like
yeah no if like, uh, I went out with my friend the other
night and she was in town. She's from Brooklyn, and that is gonna
be a tax ride off. To be fair, in a way, every
date is a business dinner because you are essentially trying to figure out if you're
compatible with this person to financially merge with them, among other things. I
mean, but the big the biggest daily influence on you will be the financial
implications of that, you know, relationship, whether it's kids or a home
or both. So yeah, it's a business owner, right, Am I
gonna acquire you? Yeah? And are you? Is a merger? An
acquisition? Yeah? Successions on the mind. Yeah, I can't wait.
What's it? What's an acquisition called? Uh, it's actually just a hostile
takeover? Yeah, Dan just kidnaps her a bear hug. Yeah, but
yeah, thanks for listening to the Patreon We love you guys. Um,
what's that voicemail number? The voicemail number is because we've been to watch Along
this week and we liked you and watch Lungs too, but we really love
answering your your history questions. Hopefully you like this one the Spartacus because it
was it was a tough watch like it No, for like forty percent of
it, that back half, the back nine on. Yeah, that was
fantastic. I'm still looking. You should have this in like a note,
a pinned note. Nah, just do it. No, well, first
off, you can also just search five one two in the note chap just
to start, or so many ways to do this. Maybe in the messages.
I believe you said it many times probably, but he texts a lot
of five one two people, so that there's gonna be a lot of noise
and searching your text mess I don't I don't have any five one twos.
It's Austin. I don't fuck with anybody from Austin. That's fair. I
wouldn't either. You know, you just blurt it out when you get it,
and we'll yeah, okay, I'll do that, and uh yeah,
we'll call the voicemail and call the voice. We love the voicemail. Yeah,
like dementia, Uh Tourette's from Monday. Yeah, just shout it out.
Yeah yeah yeah. But in the meantime, um, it's Patreon,
so you know, a lot of times we're just doing another episode, but
it's a patre On episode, just behind a paywall. But then I see
my Patreon is we can have a little more fun, can do whatever we
want. It's our little playground, it is, And so today we need
a little little whackier than we would on the main feat. Since Dan has
been slacking and won't write, I don't even it's been so long since we've
done the game show that I don't even remember what it's called. I can't
do the game show. If Coop isn't here, we could use other people.
That's not fun, though, yes it is. I guess all right,
fine, we'll ask Jesse to join Joel's team. Oh no, they
would get murdered. It needs to be another person. That number is five
one two eight one five one for three. Yeah, no, motherfucker,
it's five one two eight one five one for three. Pin the note.
No, we'll make it tough. I'll pin it right now. I mean
we could probably pin it as a Patreon post. What is the history game
called? Do you even remember the trading in the past? Trade the past?
It was a fun game. We always won. We didn't always win,
we always won, and we blew we blew we walls one. We
were fucking conspired against by Dan. Honestly, if you have not listened to
the three episodes we did with Coop and Joel Penetrating the Past, go back
in. Those are the three best episodes on Patreon by far. I would
say I'll do it. I just need we need to find another We got
to find another history for sure. Actually, I've never listened to those,
and now that I'm a patron, you should, I'm going it is it
honestly is hilarious, Like how ups that Rob gets this? Yeah right,
Yes, I'm deeply competitive, and not only my deep I'm a competitive person
like at most things, but like history is like the it is the thing
I'm not only very good at, but better than pretty much literally everyone,
and I actively sabotage you guys. Yeah, there was one question I remember
this notes like what US State doesn't have football program? And we're like,
well, there's a couple like are we d one? You're like that's the
question? Yeah, it wasn't that, but it was something like, um,
I remember asking like specific World Cup games and shit like what's the score
final? And then I was like Joel who h was the president of Jordan
the Civil War? Like yeah, it might not have gotten it, it's
he he. Essentially, it doesn't even take that much Like I was gonna
make a Mario karts who had the RBI record? You didn't know that,
no one, because that's not a normal thing people know. Nobody knows Hank.
Yeah, but like you essentially, as soon as Joel and Coop fall
like two questions behind, you'll start tossing them blue shells like it's fucking Mario
kart, you know what I mean. It's NBA jam where the uh,
the AI kind of picks up and it's like the other team has to come
back. Yeah, it's not fun this way. It's yeah, if you
blow them out of the water, and it's not fun, it's fun for
me. It's like it's like that. I know, it's I know it's
more fun for the viewer, so either our listener or whatever. So that
makes sense to me because like, but like, if you're a fan of
the team, you want to see them sweep the World Series, right,
But if you're but if you're casual and you don't have a vested in just
neither team, and if you have money on the game, you Georgia fins
probably loved the National Championship. I did too, honestly because fuck TCU,
that is such a soft ass team, no pass. But I don't want
Georgia winning anything. But that's fair, I know. Yeah, but still
like fuck, you know you definitely if you're on the team that's kicking ass.
It's so much fun. Oh yeah, But anyway, I decided to
do a little bit of a game here half acidly compared to pend to train
the pass, which you do put together. Well, so today you two
are gonna play a little bit of a guessing. What are you guessing?
Is it the first question? Yeah? Uh, gotta start, shit,
what are you guessing? Um? Actually, now I do want you to
guess what you're guessing? Okay, Uh, this is fun. I like
this. I have to think about who you are and the kind of questions
you would want me to answer. Uh, they're all related. It's one
category. It's one one thing that you're guessing. Oh, we're and over
again. Um, how big each president's dick was? I mean that's a
good guess. Yeah. Um, I was gonna say something presidential. Yeah,
I think it's gonna be president related. Um. How many Native Americans
died in wars with the colonies? Not even close on either one? On
anither one. Now, since this is primarily an audio show, you know
this, this is an audio focusing. We're gonna listen to ancient languages and
you're gonna guess which one it is. You're gonna make me do more work.
I already cut it up for you. Yeah, but still so it's
not gonna be that much work. It's gonna be you hitting copy and paste
and then having and also I do it now, so I doesn't do everything
I no, no, no, no, world us. You told us
about it. That's your fault. Yeah, you should really should gets it
expose the secret. Yeah you're like, hey, guys, good news.
I don't have to. I don't do the work I did anymore. Yeah,
isn't that great? Trust me. I've been trying to get the fucking
chat GPT to do the business Taxi'm sure it only does the video. Yeah,
but right off the bat, I do have to say, like,
you're not gonna get a lot of these, So I'm not gonna make you
guess which ancient civilization, every single one of them, any ancients? These
are these dead languages or mostly Yeah, okay, So what I'm gonna ask
you is region or country like modern country? All right? Uh? And
obviously you can throw out any You're gonna get some of them, right for
sure. For sure you're gonna get some of them, right one of you
is uh, but you can give me a modern region as well, be
like, oh, I think that's from fucking Mongolia or you know what I
mean? Sure, whatever, And also I want you to give me,
uh, you know what kind of vibe you're getting from these people. If
you're gonna give give a why, it's like, why'd you pick that?
It's like always gonna be a racist answer. Yeah, well yeah, that's
on you. I suppose no. But I mean like it's like, will
they sound kind of yeah, well A lot of them are from the Middle
East, so you can't. All right, well, let's let's get into
it. I'm gonna just guess Middle East every time. A lot, not
all of them, not even close to all of them. I mixed it
up. We'll start with um, that's what might be. All right,
I want of you to guess. Here's language number one l Teton hoopla,
the Latin. You going Latin? I'm gonna go with the Gungan race that
charge our banks. First off, that's not it at all, because they're
like miss ra ra ra, So that's I don't think it's Gungan. It's
not even a good guess. That's not even a good fake guess. Yeah,
we all know what mind to cling on? It's cling on. No,
I think it's gonna be um Latin. But I'm probably gonna say more
like closer to the step, not like I feel like it's close to the
step. But it's still European, like maybe like in that like Turkish Greek
kind of what kind of vibe? Well, you just said three different things,
step, Greek, and Latin. I said closer to the step,
but not at the step like, so I'm thinking, like it's probably it's
all the same shit. Man, Misa wants to kill myself. You don't
gotta guess, Missa, swim to the bottom of the lake and breathe it.
I'm going gungan we kind of vibe where you getting from that lang?
I was getting Latin. I was getting a little spooky, like I was
getting a curse put on me. Okay, that was an ancient Greek.
Oh so I was kind of close in my you were a little close your
piece of shit. That is what ancient Greek sounded like. I don't that
one in particular. I was like, what don't they still speak Greek?
Yeah? What changed? But yeah, I don't like what I mean,
I see you know, No, I don't fucking know softcore history. Okay,
that was I But like I read I heard. I mean, I
guess if I heard someone speak Greek, now I wouldn't really know what language
they were speaking. I understand. I would if I saw the Greek alphabet,
I would be like, oh yeah, that's the Greek alphabet. So
one of the few languages I know how to read a different alphabet. And
just because I'm loosely organ like in a fucking system that chose letters right randomly,
yeah, it's like cool. It's like, but our crest is in
Latin, what's up with that? And it's like, don't shut the fun
don't worry about it. And again, my crest has a sphinx on it
for me, sores a pyramid. Uh yeah, all of our houses is
your house should just be like vulture, dog cat, it should be higher
glyphs. Yeah, it really, it really should be like I would like
to say we were a Ptolemaic fraternity, but that was above everyone's head,
believe it or not. That's above my head. All right, next one,
next up again, this one, I'm gonna say, you probably should
be able to get the civilization, but if you want to give me a
region, that's fine too, okay, And you know, give me a
tell me what vibe you're getting from these people names. It's Russian, it's
old Russian, so it'd be like, like, I guess not crilic,
but like, is it crilic like Russian. I'm not gonna make you guess
the actual language. So if you want to say, like it's Russia Russian,
yeah, yeah, it's an ancient Russians some sort of. That's Guardian.
It's Heartsier, it's what as Guardian. Okay, you're doing comic and
you're you're having fun. A bit continues weirdly, though, I'm gonna give
it to you. What what's guard is? Oh wait, that was Viking?
Oh shit, that is closer than what I said. What's up?
Damn it? That's Viking. It's like I knew, Yeah, point for
Dan, that's bullshit. He's talking about a fucking planet in another dimension.
But it's a Viking planet. And actually I think can canonically they taught the
Vikings their language. That's fair. I hate it. It sounds so Russian.
It sounded a little Russian. But there's parts to me that scream Nordic.
I could know what parts screamed that to you, there's I don't know.
I have to re listen to it. You men, we go back
through scrub scrub the sound and be like, oh that one was that was
yeah? I mean yeah, I agree, and the Vikings did extend into
Russia for a while. They rated Russia a lot. It's interesting though,
too that the like the northern that part like that high up has similar sounds,
like even though it's you know, they're not the same country. And
yeah, like similar sounding language, Like how language. I wonder if there's
like a tone that changes as you go like up and down latitudinally. I
assume you know, South America has different accents and stuff, so probably yeah,
yeah, but I mean like like if you went like South America and
like East Coast Africa like or West Coast Africa, like, are there similar
tonal patterns, yeah, based on like environment and stuff. All right,
so Dan, you've got one out of two. Jake is oh for two
so far if you win by one point, can murder rob not Dan?
That's fine. Next up? Now, these aren't all When I say any,
I shouldn't have said ancient. These are historic languages. So it's mostly
ancient, but there's some Middle Ages in there too, Okay, all right?
Next up to ha to TV colupo um coon comique ubok. I want
to see Egyptian. I'm gonna go with the fine people of Chad. Chad
right next to Egypt. Yeah, so you think it's just country over Yeah,
what Egypt adjacent? It's Egypt adjacent, so north like North Africa basically
is what we're getting out, I guess. But I think the drums really
hammered it home for Chad. Chad, Chad known for their drums and drum
circles, the drumming country. Yeah, I did, Like that's the vibe
you were getting a Chad drums. I'm not just a vibe, I know.
The vibe I was getting was someone was presenting something to someone of an
exalted status and there was drums, like it was a reception playing or something
like that, like I am presenting to you this Like that's kind of it
felt. It had kind of like a dignitary vibe to it almost all right,
while these people, uh the Egyptians were not even aware they existed,
let alone the people of Chat. That was a mind that was the Mayan
language. Oh huh, I'm throwing a challenge flag you mean, well,
interestingly enough latitudinally pyramid people. I think I should get it because they have
pyramids. They do have pyramid Chad. I'm gonna go with Noah. Many
people go to the Pyramids of Chad. I think they're probably are pyramids and
Chad. It wouldn't surprise. I don't even know if it's called Chad anymore.
Yeah, I know. It changed his names many times. Here's the
thing about the continent we're talking about. Those countries change a lot. Yeah,
I change a lot. Also a lot more diverse than anyone gives him
credit for her It's really funny when people are just like Africa black, it's
not even black. Like actually had a lovely conversation with an uber driver estory.
He's like, here's the thing, like, this is a black guyed
driving the car. He's like, Kamala Harris isn't black. He explained it
to me and he was like, Kamala Harris can trace her fucking roots to
uh India and Jamaica. I can't do that. She's not black. She
has no idea like, well, her roots didn't start in Jamaica. No,
so she can't trace them past Jamaica. Yeah, I trust me.
I was letting the guy spit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was
very fun. But if he if he can trace his roots to Georgia,
that's the same as her tracing her roots to Jamaica. You understand, I'm
not getting I'm not touching it. So I just thought it was interesting.
Yeah, that's fair. Yeah, all right, So Dan, you're one
for three. Jake over three so far, dance Batton three thirty three.
I cannot believe you gave him a house guard. I mean, why wouldn't
he It was pretty close because it's not a real place. It's just funny
that the troll was correct, because he really it's not correct. It was
It's funny that the troll was closer. Sue, it was the same thing.
All right, we'll got with the next one. Maria sham Sua.
This is what Aladdin said. I was gonna says Jafar. Yeah, it's
just so far. It sounds like Jafar. Bro. Guys are in the
ballpark. I mean yeah, it's uh. Is it Arabian? You're the
ball is? Yeah? Arabic is airb Yeah, but um, you're in
the ballpark. I'm gonna go with uh. Let's go Mesopotamian like Sumerian.
Okay, pass, it's pass. It's from the country of past. I
got to say, Dan, the people have past wrote that is their language.
Dan is correct again, Yes, that was Egyptian. That was ancient
Egyptian. Damn, I was close last time you got it. I mean
you were gonna just start throw boy, I can't throw Egypt out now,
I mean you can't. Yeah, yeah, you still got Latin in the
hole. That one hasn't been done yet. Okay, neither has Samarian,
which is on the list. Oh, I have no idea what Sumerian would
fucking sound like. Honestly, I would have if someone told me that was
Samarian, it would have been like, yeah, sure, why not.
Yeah. I just by the way, I found this very fascinating, found
this YouTube video and was listening to all these ancient languages, and I think
it's fascinating to actually hear these people or hear what them speaking sounds like,
Yeah, how do they they just get like a scholar that knows how to
speak it? Yeah? Actually they got an ai bought like David from Prometheus.
Really they used to I'm about to no, no, no, no,
no. I just do just think that's funny that David just went back
to like Indo European languages until he got like to the root like twenty thousand
years. I was like, yeah, I could talk to advanced aliens now
because they just did this one language. It's like super basic language that they
taught humans. Uh okay, okay, that's I need to rewatch Prometheus.
Actually, like it's a good movie. People like shot on it way too
much. I like it standalone, yeah, like like I don't really try
to like play into the whole, like, oh, it's part of the
alien thing. I mean obviously it is, but it's kind of fine on
its own. Uh. It's yeah, it's completely like I enjoy, Like,
I think it's just fucking good. But a lot of people, for
whatever reason, don't like it. Just fucking shoot on it. Why.
I don't know for what reason? Uh? Next up, we have get
hold on Sorry I should pin it in the fucking playback ap bitch yep,
here we go. This is the next one. This is a medieval language,
Okay, so don't think ancient. I'm just gonna help you out there.
March huf parison to the Rota under bothered every vine in switch liquor,
of which virtue and gender is the floor one Zephyro's sake with his sweet breath
in spirit, huff in every holt and half the tender Coropus I would guess
Old English Elvish. Is this from the people of Elvia Dan right again,
I would say Old English, possibly Flemish. You're very close, but I
can't give it to you. Dude, hold on, let me get there.
Uh get through. You're even closer than you think you are. Old
English Flemish. You're even closer than close. God's say another UK. I
know that's what well, I'm just trying to think of. Like, all
right, I'll just say I can't give it to you because the one you
just said is also on the list. Okay, but it's Middle English Middle
English. Okay, so well, yeah, it wouldn't be old because it's
medieval. It's Middle English. Fuck sure, as guardians still stands at the
one point, but Old English and Middle somebody a point. I mean fine,
yeah, but yeah, that is you didn't hear like that. I
like you see you here, like every floor with gendered It's just like you
could almost understand it if you know what it is. I don't think you're
right. It's the language they speak in the SIMS. Yeah, it's just
the language you speaking SIMS. Can I get the point? No, No,
you don't get the SIMS point. Sims is on here later. Don't
worry about it'd be great, all right, next step one of you should
probably get this. I doubt it to you, but talking to Dan for
the audio listening, fucking bet dude. Actually that one's really hard for me
for some reason. Really. Yeah, it's like it sounds so familiar that
I'm like, why Jewish, that's not a language. Hebrew? There you
go. I guess it's Portugese. Seat it's actually I got a recording through
a wormhole of Dan's relative. Yeah. Uh, they're by a hill.
What vibe are you getting from this this guy? That guy's mad, he's
very mad. Yeah, Um, tango, first Hebrew? You're going with
Hebrew? So obviously wasn't Hebrew? It's not Hebrew? Um? How is
that obvious? Kind of almost want to hear Can I hear it again?
I'll pay back again, Okay, I don't take backs. You don't need
another ab Actually, Latin boom, you got it, fucking Latin, suck
it. Hebrew is the same, Doug. No, it's not still get
a point half point least you get zero points. You have a point.
You have a point for asgard to take yours. I know half point to
be above you. No, just get another one, rightly. Not Yeah,
you can actually only get troll. You can only give troll answers now,
but your troll answer has to be roughly of the culture that we're talking
about. Yeah, right, So if there's like a Middle Eastern wane,
I need you to be like, yeah, those people that are on the
other side of stargate, just like whatever the mummy speaks for Egyptian. Yeah,
all right, Emo, chep fucking said that Olmec from Legends of the
Hidden Temple's language, he was he would have been the South American oneer the
Mayans. Well, no, there is an OLMC culture as well. Oh
that's true. You're right, so maybe he's just he's o the Olemac.
That's weird. What's that bad? Hey, my name is American. You
have America, the American, Yes, America forever. I mean, there's
so many women that are named after cities. There's so many men that are
named after cities. Yeah, Dallas, Austin, Well, Austin was a
name first Waterloo. Yeah, so was Houston. Every everything in Texas is
named after somebody. Yeah, it's the other way around. Travis County,
Philadelphia, phil Yeah, it's Phil's city. It's Phil's Phil's del there is
isn't like Delphi? Doesn't that of something? Youna do who knows Philadelphia?
Who want? Who cares? You don't want to? You want to break
it down? No new language? Have you guys? Come on hit us?
All right, all right, it's fun. Next up hill tom zum
illatim bill it ishiktimist. This one, when I listened to it writing this
episode threw me the fuck off. I was like, what how so I'll
just say you right now? Not from where? Not? It did not
sound how I thought these people would sound at fucking all. Okay it that
almost sounded slightly Hebrew, which was crazy. Um, well you're in the
right region, yeah, I was, um massad so Hebrew. That's that's
it's their code, it's their coded Hebrew that they're speaking. Um uh final
answer, yeah, um, right regions. So that means they're on the
Mediterranean. Oh no, right, they're not on the Mediterranean. I'm gonna
just poke at that until you tell me where they are, right yeah.
Um, there is one in here that I'm not gonna do. Like I
kept a clip just in case we needed it for time. But the Hittites
is in here, and I was just like, that's people don't even know
what that fucking civilization is alone. Yeah, but the Hittites were on the
Metterrand. They were like up in Turkey and ship. But yeah, I'm
probably just gonna go like, uh, Lebanese, Okay. It was the
Sumerians. Ah, sumer Again, I didn't think it would sound like that.
It actually makes a lot of sense that it would sound like that though,
because kind of simple. Yeah, well it's simple, but like sound
wise, it sounds kind of Hebrew And I mean like we all trace our
roots back there anyway, so technically literally because Abraham was Sumerian from Er or
something Sumerian. Yeah, so it makes sense. Yeah, Mesopotamia kind of
the cradle there. People forget Abraham lived in Sumer he did. Or is
such a funny name for an ancient city. I know, er Her,
Like that's this one called Smeer. It's like a caveman city. They're like,
what do you call your city? Er? There's a couple like that
though, aren't there. There's like a couple two letter old cities out there.
Uh yeah, And I wonder if that's what the other that's what like
the Hub of Information called those cities versus like they had actually better names,
but they're like, oh yeah, we're we're sumer that's Er, Yeah,
that's Er, that's dah, Yeah, that's Ak, that's no. Yeah,
probably, But yeah, I kin't want to do an episode on like
historic Abraham be interesting. How much like how much do we really have on
him? Well he probably didn't exist, yeah, like as like it's all
Bible but it comes from a real place. Yeah, like they know that,
they know that, they know that, they know the Sumerian city that
didn't exist anymore by the time they were writing it. That's crazy that they
knew that, right, Yeah, that's fucking wild. How much like holdover
shit do you think we lost just from like people not writing stuff down?
It's probably so much shit? Uh most No, it's all written down is
in the supercomputer. Well actually it is all written down right now. Currently,
it's just mixed up with a million other combinations of things. But yeah,
like every I think I told you about this the AI project that they
put like every conceivable combination of written language into it, so like you can
go in there and it's like what I'm saying to you right now. It's
written in it already in like Samarian or no, no, it's written in
English. Jake's already said this. Yeah, it's it's what I am saying.
The cadence you cutting in and all that it is written in there.
Okay, it's pretty nuts. Actually, we should be able to use AI
one day because it can just run, especially the faster the computing power.
Guess, it can run every possible um, it's like the multiverse, right,
like every thing, every possible thing can happen, right, so essentially
it could get every single possible thing right in history, but then get everything
wrong right right, it's sifting out the wrong. But like, yeah,
they can essentially figure out every single little detail that happened in history by just
running it again and again and again and again and again, so we know
exactly what happened in like seventeen thousand. What do you think? Alright,
hit us with another language, damn it. That's kind of what they're doing
with this thing, this project. They're like, oh, well, we
can search like the cure for cancer is blank, and then like find every
result that starts with that and then work through it like with super computing.
What if they were just like, I hope chat chyp just like the cure.
Like you're like, hey, chat chypt, what's the cure for cancer?
And like the hold on and then it's like compute for a second,
Like the cure for cancer is honey, Jesus Christ, the prayer, the
power of belief in the power of prayer, and the power of faith in
Jesus Christ. It's just like something very widely available, pepto bismo, eat
more granola. Kale, It's kale. So I've been kale this whole time.
Damn it all right, hit us with the language computer, man,
let's see pick another one. I'm just kind of jumping around. Oh I
did that one already. I don't know why two of them. You probably
could throw the same one at us again, and I probably I easily could.
Yeah, and I will every time. He's just lying about the answers.
Old on, let me find the one I was on. Oh,
here we go. It is nuts that you organize us all in premiere.
Yeah, just so I could export clips quickly to give them to you.
Fat ansros ceo nmac is tatio san mantoos indra kenny st na um. That
sounded Latin based. Um, you will be wrong. Wow really yeah,
get off of that train immediately. Okay, Um it is however post Rome
post robe oh well during end post but it survived. H it's Goth the
goths going all right, I'm gonna go with the mental language and connection that
Pie from a Life of Pie had the tiger on the boat. That is
correct, unbelie does it a gas? It's human tiger parcel tug? How
does he do it? The man's incredible? Really, but like Indian?
Like what kind? Yeah? I don't think the language is Indian if I
had to guess India the same way, like people call it Chinese, but
it's really like Mandarin or something like. I don't know what they speak in
Indian? What do they speak in India? I have no fun I'll look,
I have English. I think it's Hindi. Oh it is Hindia.
Come on? Which is even which which sounds even more reductive than Indian kind
of yeah, that's what, damn Hindi. It's like you speak Mexican,
Mexican, I speak Mexi or it's like actually it's actually what it's really like
is you Israeli? You speak jew It's kind of that. Yeah, it's
kind of that. Hey, I'll speak that jew, don't you. Sounds
like change rattling in a pocket. Um. Yeah, they speak ching chong
over there, and they speak chuching over here. You know what I'm saying.
God, I could do this all day. Guys. It's really easy
to be a bigot. It's it's it is crazy. It's super easy.
It's the easiest thing you can do. Like, all right, what do
you say? I disagree because I hear a lot of fucking like low hanging
fruit jokes on a daily basis online and stuff like that, and that's much
better than all of them. Yeah. Yeah, uh Dan, you should
feel great shame for getting this wrong. That sporschius the Celtic language. I
did not expect that you have a Celtic tattoo. I'm not married to it.
You kind of are. If it's on your body up for the I
might you know, get covered up. Oh really, you're gonna your heritage
I don't know, but not the the Fiji one. Huh. I'll get
that covered up too. Don't get your frat tat covered uh boo. They
have like three year temporary tattoos. Now, have you seen these things ephemeral,
like it seems like a waste. I don't know, it seems like
a huge waste of time for three years. You see. If you like
it and what, it just goes away or you can get it perma if
fades. Basically, Actually, that's a genius thing, doesn't at all.
It's very symbolic of life. Yeah, well it's literally called aphemeral, So
yeah, I think it's a pretty good name for the company. Actually that
is genius though, because idiots, what what is someone like Pete Davidson?
W Yeah, twos of the people you date and well just more and more
tattoos. But you only have so much real estate unless you just get obees.
Yeah, that's actually a brilliant idea. Yeah right, I just gotta
make some more masks that stretches. Yeah, uh no, I mean it's
in theory. It's like, oh, you know, I want to give
SoundCloud wrapping a try. Let me. Uh, I'll give it a good
three year with all these faced stats and stuff and work out it's fine,
goes away. I get I thought about literally in my body with every girl
a date, just symbolic tattoo of them. That's giving a lot of ownership
to someone that's not yourself, of your body be a lot of people with
a himp, yeah, or so you just let's just get a tear drop.
No, it's like an NFL quarterback. So you know, if you
have if everyone owns your body, nobody owns your body. Hmmm. That
sounds like it doesn't work that way for that thing. You're just like the
town's slave and they're like, nah, if you all own me, none
of you own me. They're like, no, we'll figure out a schedule,
get back to work. It's called management. Yeah, all right,
let's put the language. I don't even know what I picked here, Okay,
here we go, meaning the steward eat bunk, snucks don't then snuck,
don't, the star don't. Those are some hard consonants to hit.
And it's throwing me because it sounds of the Asian continent. Okay, but
it could be like further north than I'm thinking. It's funny how because I
knew what these are in terms of like I was watching the video and it
was saying it, so I was like, oh m, that sounds like
that. Yeah totally, but like you guys not Yeah, no, I
have no anchor in this so like like honestly, like, there was a
couple like Sumerian where I was like, what the fuck that sound like that?
That can't be Sumerian. Yeah, you're like, that's not what I
imagined at all. But there's other ones where yeah, I just sat there
and nodded. I was like, mm yep, yeah, my this tracks
for me because I'm such a fucking expert on link with me. Yeah right,
No, I have no idea. Uh, that was Mulan. It
was just from Mulan, the Asian Chinese language release one. Yeah, I'll
go with Mongolian point Dan. It is ancient Chinese. Suck it, Okay,
Dan's got two points from only troll answers. Oh my god, I
guess I would have. I mean I was. I was definitely in the
right direction you were, Yeah, I mean I nailed it. I'm letting
dango first from now on. That's fine. Next up, make a man
of you, Jake. That was godkning fam Avros after kennedyng God send a
fold, cut off fear and thought, here Lung, I got this.
You want to go first. It's Gaelic, Okay, William Walker, It's
just William Walker's book. Oh not William Walker. Fuck Brave Heart, William
Wallace. William Wallace Scottish. You're saying it's old scott No, it's just
William Wallas. It's just literally a recording. So for the sake of the
troll, answer it's scott I'm going Gaelic. Okay, it is not Gaelic?
Is it like old Irish? Though it is. I just need to
check something to see if Dan's answers. Right? Oh god, where what
is it? Is that one Flemish? No? Give it to come on
seeing. Okay, I can't give this to Dan because William Wallace died one
hundred ish years after this language stop being spoken. But you were so close.
No was it old Scottish? Probably spoils that's old English, damn it.
Fuck? He probably in different spots. Twice Yeah, no, three
times, he said Samarian as well. Oh yeah, no, I mean
it doesn't matter. I'm still winning, right, Yeah, you're up to
one h yes, you know it's two two? No, it's not,
it's two one. I only can't go. Yeah, I'm sorry, it's
two one Dan, Yeah, it should be three one. It's not.
It's two one. Now, I was you were come on, come on,
and I mean you can make an argument that Scotland was a little backwards
and they were speaking Old English longer than and I will. Well, you
can put an asterisk wherever you want, but we really also need to subject
Dan to a penetrating the past at some point. Yeah, he can't only
be the host. No, yeah, I want you on the fucking stage.
It's my show. You go with you go with Joel. Yeah,
who's gonna host Jesse? Someone else? Yeah, we'll get Jesse does all
right? You could still write it fine, didn't know what the answers.
No, No, he won't. He'll forget. I'll forget most of them.
Yeah, but the end studies harder than for the for that than anything
he's got like flash cards for all the questions probably to be honest. All
right, let me find the next language here at Middle and Old English?
Oh man, oh that one is definitely not it. Um all right,
this one. I will accept the region as well, Like you can't say
Earth, Yeah, go on Earth. It's I'm not gonna take Asia.
But if you give me a relative radius type of situation game, like seven
countries you think it could be from, and if you get one of those
in there, go give it to you. Okay, don't need it,
I know you don't. Of Womb, I don't know why there's music to
nasill beon, but use it to guide you as hal Lahman, Sunkan and
Yumana join cobein What movie is this from that is gonna be? I think
it's what the rock speaks in Scorpion King. Okay, well, we've already
done Ancient Egyptian. It's not that he doesn't speak Ancient Egyptian in the Scorpion
King. I don't think he does. Okay, well, I can tell
you this language if we want to guess again he King because this language didn't
exist until I would guess, like fifteen hundred years after Scorpion King took place.
M hm. There is another movie that this language would have been spoken
in. There's and it does star someone who was um playing a different race
than they were, just like the rack can the Scorpion King. But again,
yeah, one more time. It don't help of wombs name Hal Lahmanskan
and yo MANABEI going like count your fortune you get a definition? Um?
What did you say though? Was the priamble before all that? The movie?
Shit he's asking about he's asking what you just said. Movie wise,
he played someone different its language features in a movie, or like it would
they speak English in the movie, but like the place where the movie takes
place, they would be speaking this language. And it's stars someone playing at
different race than their own, much like The Rock and the Scorpion King.
Oh, Valerius, because in House of Dragon the Valarians are black. Yeah,
so he says it's Old Valerian or High Valerian maybe, which, by
the way, that's not a The Valerians are the Romans of Game of Thrones.
Essentially, we already did Latin, so I can't even give you that
as a troll answer. Yeah, I'm gonna go like Turkey, Ottoman.
What I'm gonna say, Ottoman Empire, some Ottoman Empire country. You're going
Turkey, go like uh like yeah, Turkish crete crete Okay, I don't
know what movie you think crete involved, uh, and or Turkey for that
matter. Really they end up in Turkey sometimes Midnight express Its fair enough.
I am, of course referring to Jake Jillenhall's Prince of Persia, a Persian.
So this is Acham and I said Automan, that's not, a commented
persian. I didn't hear any nightclub music. You kind of did. Let
me play it again. Now, just imagine once put put that behind it,
and maybe I cannot hear you and there and that's your club music.
But there was no gold changed clanking making this. I mean, you can't
put it all in there, you know what I mean? Like it's I
don't hear the hookahs bubbling. Wow, that's the talk about. That's the
one. Huh? All right, next step, we got two more,
two more. I'm still winning, right, you are up two to one.
How embarrassed are you right now? So embarrassed he's hurting the guitar.
I'm gonna take that. See. The problem with it, The only problem
is with me doing this is that, Um, if it was one of
you doing it, I'd be pissed off and competing to win. Where is
I don't have that, It's not any anymore. I'm like, I'm guessing
this. I can't jar h this is this empire existed in the Middle Ages.
Uh. I think it's South American or maybe Central American. UM,
probably Aztec. I'm gonna go seminal specifically Seminal Seminal. Yeah, this is
the trailer tears like not then, oh, yeah, that's true. The
Cherokee get Jake has tied it up with the asstecs um Go San Diego State.
Can we uh let me look closer into that. We mean, I
think I think someone was close enough too. No, it's not, let
me have mine too. I'm you deserve the mulan one. Oh that's braves
first off. But yeah, you have tied. I was a good guest
on the ASTEC. Yeah, it sounded like apocalypto. Sounded like a jaguar.
That should have been my answer to goddamn it, jaguar. That's just
what jaguars say, like you're do not not even Indians or humans, like
this is the language of the jaguar. Now, if you had said that
was the language that a man was speaking to a jungle cat, but it
was a western hemisphere of jungle cat, I might have might have burned life
apart too early. Yeah, I might have been glad to give it here,
like Life of Pie. But there's a jaguar and he's he's Indian with
a feather, not a dot. I remember that being visually great. It
probably was for the time. I mean definitely had to make up for what
I imagined the story lacked. What a guy on the boat with the tiger.
Yeah, I read the other day like Paul Rudd or somebody was in
that and then they got cut because they're too famous. Probably you're just taking
us out, Paul, You're taking us out of this amazing movie, fucking
taking white men out of Hollywood. Yeah, it was some like weird situation.
All right, this last one, done that, done that in that.
Yeah, this last one for all the marbles or a tie. But
I think one of you should get it. Okay, personally, I think
give should get it. Stop it, let's play. I'm not spec kadish
what you mean and who I'm a. I'm a yeah, who means some
far Let it play. I know what it is. I know what it
is too. I know I know what you're playing right now. This is,
of course mel Gibson's classic, The Crash. It's a remic. I
said it first. I said, bitch, he did say, I said
mel Gibson's classic, Like you both got it right. That was the part
I knew. It was a fucking passing walks up to Jesus and the Austin
is like get yourself down from the cross if you're such a big man,
and then Jesus is like Father, forgive them. They know not what they
do. Yeah. As soon as I heard the shouting, it's like,
oh, it's it's the creuse of fiction, like yeah, it's a good
one. That ended on Yeah. Yeah, so we tied, tied at
three three h Yeah, good job guys. That bad. That's not bad.
Yeah, well fought Dan as guardian. To be fair, Milan was
a real fair nailed it. Yeah, yeah, you got it. He
said. I could only give troll answers at that point. Yeah, that's
true, that's fair. Uh the best. You wouldn't pat myself in the
back for getting seeing Old English when it was Middle English. Yeah, I
felt bad not being able to give it. You got a great tie here.
Um, I don't know. I was pretty close with William Wallace.
I thought get actually were really close. Yeah, you were close on that.
I thought Gungan probably deserves a second look as well. Gungan for sure
from the tape back might be Gungan just uh, I mean, I could
play some Gungan language real quick if we need no, No, it's okay,
I'd rather not. Oh wait, hold on, someone just said,
what is their Google showed up what is Gungan language based on? Oh no,
let's go. I don't have to look at that real quick. We
need to review it. Uh man, come on, mom, I'm not
gonna see it. Go mom. They don't want to. George Georgie boy
never reveals the creole. It's based on creole. It's based on Louisiana people,
which is pretty fucked up because they're like, they're swamp people. These
are swamp frogs, and so it's like, you know what we speaks swamp
frog. You know you should like at war racist as ever seen like the
Asian guys. Oh yeah, well they're like, oh like like those it
was just a trade federal ration for child give all these bug aliens Asian accents
are coming. Oh it's pretty wild, to be honest. I mean,
Jaba was dude, sad people. Who's the fucking dude that owns anakin?
Oh? The Turkish guy? Yeah, Persian dude auto or what? Yeah,
he's in a taktop you jedi on me. He's just like he's just
like an old Persian who like lives in New York and runs like owns a
child. I guess on tattooing. They have wife beaters, like where the
fuck Jedi bounced checks all the time. No, I don't take your credits
here, fucking landlord. Yeah yeah, George Lucas really wrote what he knew
in the worst way possible. Yeah yeah, what is that? Guess dude,
this fucker te Ubi Beard. Okay, he's just like a gross Middle
Easterner. That is the sand planet, you see. That is the propaganda
we put out after nine eleven. Yeah, that's before nine eleven. Bro,
that movie came out ninety nine. Oh, that's why nine to eleven
happened. Well, that's why we were so down with it. Yea.
The CIA knew nine eleven was gonna happen. The programming had Lucas put out.
Yeah, oh man oh man. Well, and then to get us
down with bombing the shit out of Iraqi children, he had anna can kill
the younglings. No, no, no, no, no, hold on
that snacks. He had Annakin kill the sand people children, and then Annakin
killed so many kids. Uh only killed kid. And then the third one
take us uh desensitized to school shootings. He had Anna can kill the youngling.
But then everything's cool because he killed Palpatine. Yeah, so he just
gets to go to Jedi Heaven, yes, to be a ghost. Yeah.
He killed jozens of children. He killed all the children, jozens and
dozens pretty much, there's no Jedi where. It's just like, yeah and
the kids. Oh no, I want to get out of here and play
Last Republic Dog, Let's go Star Wars toy. I think my kid Knights
of the Old Republic, the original one. It's like nine bucks right now.
I'm the Nintendo's story. Um, the game I'm playing is cheaper.
It was like thirty bucks because the new one came out. But it's not
for the old systems. M I know. But who the fuck has a
PS five or Xbox whatever. I know a lot of people that do.
Really, I know, easier to get now. It's way easier to get
now, and I'm by I'm holding off until like later. They're real cheap.
Yeah. Well that and also like I'm gonna not stop playing it if
that, well, I just want to get out of here and play.
Well, that's it. Obviously you were both in the game today because that
was the whole point. But what'd you learn? I don't know old languages.
I learned that I held my own and the believe in myself. I
think what we really learned is that you control your way through life and end
up pretty good. That's a good lesson to learn. Yeah, it's a
great life lesson and all right for Dannage Ester and Jake Goldman, I'm Robb
Fox. You got sauce served